Caitlin Attong

Domestic Violence
Persuasive Essay Draft


You look at me and you seem to see an average 19 year old college student and by the
looks of the bags under my eyes Im lacking sleep from late nights of studying. What else can
you notice? A shy timid girl to herself, but then again you think thats just the type of girl I am.
Thats all you seem to know or at least can assume about me from the outside. Thats the thing
though Im just like every other victim who seemed normal and nothing was wrong. Its easy
to cover it up or just scared to say anything, but like me and 25% (1 in every 4) of women are in
a domestic violent relationship. 30-40% are recorded from the ER, and 17% are recorded from a
prenatal clinics. Domestic violence is one of the lowest raised awareness from the government.
You may think it should be easy to walk away, or get help, but its not as easy as it seems. There
are many dynamics that make this abuse cycle, that influences the women in many ways, from
the power of the man, the social standing of who he is and who he may know, and afraid of what
he may do next. These phases start with the tension building phase, then the acute battering
phase, and lastly the loving phase that makes the women stay. Abuse isnt the only thing these
relationships are carrying, women are reported to have emotional reactions; 50% of these abused
women will eventually develop depression and approximately 25-40% of them will attempt
suicide. Some view this as something inhumane, some just turn their cheek to the fact that it is
happening. We cannot avoid this forever, or until the numbers of women who are committing
suicide is rocketing. Our government policies on these actions are barely there to be enforced,
our police and first responder training has been improved but not enough that is eliminating the
problem, community and medical organizations are slim to none for these women and for that
matter there is no awareness being passed around. As far as Im concerned, we are allowing this
happen with a blind eye. The only way out is a stable support group, and without that you are
stuck in the same cycle with the same person, and I learned that. United Nations is one of the few
but many organizations that try to bring awareness for domestic violence against women, they
implemented every 25
th
of the month you wear orange as an awareness for those in a domestic
violent relationship. I didnt know about this until recently, to be honest not a lot do. This is the
root of the problem our lack of word to this situation. Like you and many other reading this
paper what do these numbers mean, what are we actually researching and collecting evidence,
and most of all what is the psychological affect these women are going through that we arent
taking action for. Domestic violence, say it to yourself and really think about it. It makes your
spine cringe up and disgusted by even the thought of this type of abuse. But this is where the
problem lays, we hate the thought of it so much we turn away, but you wont turn away if this
was your mother, sister, cousin, or any family member. Many girls and women who dont have a
voice who need our voice to help get through.
Domestic violence has been an issue for many years and even a worldwide issue. Lets
target this argument to the base of where it all starts, we could go as far as children witnessing
domestic violence but it comes to a point where this evidence has to be selected to college girls.
It is said women of the ages 20-24 are at the greatest risk of being victims of domestic violence.
This is the age of women who are starting college, out free willing and living life on their own.
Their most vulnerable state of mind, alone and finally have a partner that doesnt need approval
of their parents. At this age women are on their path to starting their future and living their life.
But little do they know they are at the top of the chart of being in a domestic violent relationship,
this is where the lack of awareness comes to play and isnt being introduced to young girls and
women properly or even at all. Domestic violence comes to a point where it is so crucial in the
relationship that in one year there is reported that 1 in every 3 women will die of homicide from
their partner, spouse or even former spouse. Now of course domestic violence can get to the
point of death of the women, in worse case scenarios, but with domestic violence it will come
with a lot of baggage to the women. In the New York City it has been studied that 25% of the
homeless recorded were women who were affiliated with domestic violence in their homes. My
targeted audience for young adult girls and college girls is because it was researched that without
the proper help and support or communication those female children and teens who are in a
house with domestic violence and are witnessing it, are more vulnerable to allow domestic
violence in their own life when they grow up with a partner or spouse. Girls and women are to
experience 4 million plus physical assaults and rape caused from their partners. College girls
living on an open campus are at a high risk to fall under these categories. On my campus alone
there has been reported 19 sexual assaults and two male break ins finding their partner, and one
victim was strangled by her partner. College is the easiest and highest rate of domestic violence,
but not yet have I seen awareness for domestic violence, rape, etc. We dont express this problem
enough, we dont reach out to girls who we may not know is in a domestic violent relationship,
but arent comfortable enough to seek the help she needs. It has been said that the number one
fact of this whole situation is known that majority of domestic violence cases are not reported.
Once you fall into a vulnerable stage especially of fear, you fear your next move, word and who
you talk too without the thought of being abused again. From experience you stay on your toes,
you beware of what you are doing not to tick that trigger in their head, you feel as though your
best bet is stay quiet, and this is what happens with these girls who fall into the incidents of
domestic violence.
Now you may think well these women are fine once they are seen and treated, but that is
one of the most false accusations we can think of. Women who are abused probably fall into the
worst psychological mental state of mind that it gets to a point that the women who are carried to
the emergency room from domestic violence were women who were socially isolated from the
world because of their partner, and their social and financial standing are lowered because of
their spouse. With this these women are mentally not all there, believing they have nothing left
of themselves and they held on to that relationship afraid of being left alone or failing a failure of
their marriage. These women who are victims of domestic violence go through a long process to
get the thought and fear of her partner or spouse out of her mind and visual. Victims of domestic
violence are at a high risk of depression, sleep deprivation and disturbances, anxiety, flashbacks
and many more mental and emotional distress. These are all conditions that can be treated by a
psychologist, therapist etc. with proper help. Nothing that will be cured overnight but with time,
helping them get back on track. Unfortunately not all cases of domestic violence victims may be
able to get out as easily with conditions like those, many victims will take it so horribly that it
will start becoming chronic conditions as of heart diseases or gastrointestinal disorders and many
more serious conditions from domestic violence. We have heard about the conditions and
consequences from these actions, but no one knows the real reason why these men have these
urges, or what has happened at home to cause them to grow up like this. There are many
variations on to how to take the evidence. Starting at home as a child, when a child is around
these conditions growing up they will grow up to do the same actions that they were around as a
child, to them its a sense of lifestyle for them so they continue the lifestyle from their father and
so on. Thinking this is as easy as it sounds but children growing up in those types of conditions
will start to have eating disorders, abuse or neglect, causing the cycle of abuse to pass to the next
generation. These kids will grow up with many health and mental conditions that no one is
attending too because of the abuse at home. Research has shown that 60% of domestic violence
is occurring at home.
Now knowing the psychological and physical damage that victims of domestic violence
have to go through, and the insight of how it all starts, I ask myself and many others, what is
actually being done to help people get through this, what is our government doing non the
less what type of support systems are really out there and easy to contact. For over the years
there have been laws made about abuse towards your spouse and even your children, there
has been special training towards our first responders etc., but at the end of the day why isnt
this situation under control, why are these experts who know so much about the problem
getting out there talking to young girls to help them avoid and get out of these situations.
Safe Horizon states Domestic violence costs more than $37 billion a year in law
enforcement involvement, legal work, medical and mental health treatment, and lost
productivity at companies. It all comes down to we have all these resources supposedly, all
this money that is going towards domestic violence but how is it that the voice isnt loud
enough to stop these deaths, abuse, and conditions of 1 in every 4 women. There are many
organizations like NCADV (national coalition against domestic violence), NDAA (national
defense authorization act), NCCPR (national coalition for child protection reform). Many of
these organizations share facts, statistics and ways to help women get out of these situations.
Domestic violence is starting to get so out of hand and widely spread organizations like the
United Nations who are starting to get affiliated with the incidents and trying to spread the
word, personally I dont believe we are spreading the word in the right places, and
connecting to the right audience.
As a victim of domestic violence, it took a toll on my life, it was a dark spot in my life. It
was a sense of drowning and not knowing how to get above the water, or to even know how
to ask for help. It comes to a point where you isolate yourself, and wish someone could know
without telling them. No girl nor women should have to go through this. But we cant force
someone to talk even if we suspect the slightest about their situation. The way of action is to
bring awareness especially to the young adults of women who are at the highest risk of
falling into these circumstances. Domestic violence is an inhumane act that isnt getting put
to a stop no matter the amount of money we pour out to the causes or the number of hotlines
they are being spread to call. The root of the problem is not talking to the girls who need to
hear it, to reassure them of the homes, and facilities that are at their fingertips. The source
that I believe to reduce the problem is connecting to girls, young girls who are in college,
girls who are at their vulnerable stage and at the peak of being victims of abuse. The more
aware they are to what to look for and how to escape from the problem and being able to talk
to some and will be protected, soon the cases will be reported, and the incidents will start to
be reported and decrease of casa. The more comfortable environment that is introduced, the
less these victims will fall into farther crucial situations and harm.