By: Timothy Paul, J r

Creative Writing Collected Since 1999

Things Ive Learned

We come to love not by finding a perfect person, but by learning to see an imperfect
person perfectly, having to ever wonder which hurts the most: saying something and
wishing you had not, or saying nothing, and wishing you had, then learning that the
spaces between your fingers were created so that another's could fill them in...No
One Was Placed On This Planet To Be Alone...

Its Amazing How Beautiful Life Is When You Think Outside The Box...The
Possibilities Are Endless...Although Its Beautiful Inside Also, Because You Are
Grateful For What You Have...However It Just Seems More To Visualize And
Experience When Your Set Free And Know That Nothing Can Stand In Your Way
Or Hold You Back. One Step at a Time Father...One Step At A Time...

~What I s The Truth?~(I n A State Of Confusion)

-What Is The Truth?
-Can Anyone Tell Me?
-Do You Even Know?
-How Do You Know What You Believe To Be True Is Really The Truth?
-How Do You Know That You Werent Told A Lie As Well?
-They Say That The Truth Hurts Which I Believe Is In Fact True
-However I Also Believe That the Truth Hurts thats Why We Lie
-So if the Truth Really hurts and its so easy to believe a lie because it sounds better
to the ears
-Does that mean that in order to keep us in line to never question the reality of a
thing means that we have to be lied to in order for us just to Believe in falsehood and
that its ok?
-I would rather believe in A Truth based on what I feel and not what Ive been told
-Because living a constant lie only means that the chain of lies will continue until you
decide to wonder why

-Take Religion for example (This is Gonna Make Some of You Mad but I Dont
Care. The Truth is what Im Aiming for)I Believe in God because I feel HimI
know He is thereI Pray to Him in His NameI Believe in seeking 1st the
Kingdom of GodI Believe in His Angels and I also Believe that the Devil and His
Demons are real. One of many things that I find hard to believe is that a woman was
pregnant without intercourse and was able to give birth to a child that is the Son of
God and is the savior of us allDidnt they say that about all the other sub
divisions in religion? They say that Jesus Christ saved us from the Devils grasp on
our lives when how can that be when at first the Bible says that we should not
trust man. So if we shouldnt trust man then doesnt that mean that we shouldnt
trust in the things that man creates hence Jesus Christ, and all the other religions
that were created? Christianity (which has Subdivisions of Christianity including
the Roman Catholic Church, Mormon Church, Eastern Orthodox Church,
Lutheran Church, Jehovahs Witnesses, Baptist Church, Methodist Church, and
more. As in the case of Islam and Judaism, Christianity is an Abrahamic religion.),
Islam, Judaism, Bahai, Hinduism, Atheism, Candomble, Jainism, Jehovah's
Witnesses, Mormons, Paganism, Rastafari, Shinto, Sikhism, Taoism, Unitarianism,
Zoroastrianism, Agnosticism?

-I was raised to Believe in Jesus Christ and to be a Christian of a Baptist
background and to believe in the Holy Trinity of The Father, The Son, and The
Holy SpiritBut I began to wonder to myself how can there be so many ways to
serve one God? I mean isnt that all that really matters is to serve and believe in
God? To have Faith and Believe in God? That Ultimate Power, the Being and
Existence that wakes me up every morning, that allows me to go to work with no
harm done to me, that allows me to continue a healthy life? And not serve all the
subcategories under it? God is a jealous God Right? God is not a God of Confusion,
Bitterness against one another because of the division and difference to serve one
Living Godand this is all that isnothing but confusion, bitterness and hatred to
serve one God.

-Yeah people say that if being wrong could be right then Id rather be wrong
and just live how I am I disagreeI say if being wrong is wrong then let me find
the truth and be right then believe in a lie then decide to find the truth and what I
feel to be true so that way it wont be another case of the Blind leading the Blind. No
one has come from the dead to say that any of these Men of Religion are real. We
have all be told the Disney fairytale storiesand the stories of The Gods and
Goddess, and the Warriors and Fables, and the things that help us stay in linebut
doesnt that just mean that we are excepting the lie, living it and not wanting to
know the truth? Again I say:
-What Is The Truth?
-Can Anyone Tell Me?
-Do You Even Know?
-How Do You Know What You Believe To Be True Is Really The Truth?
-How Do You Know That You Werent Told A Lie As Well?
-They Say That The Truth Hurts Which I Believe Is In Fact True
-However I Also Believe That the Truth Hurts thats Why We Lie
-So if the Truth Really hurts and its so easy to believe a lie because it sounds better
to the ears
-Does that mean that in order to keep us in line to never question the reality of a
thing means that we have all been lied to in order for us just to Believe in falsehood?
-I would rather believe in A Truth based on what I feel and not what I've been told
-Because living a constant lie only means that the chain of lies will continue until you
decide to wonder why





~Praying With Action~

-Praying Dont Make You Religious...
-Praying Dont Make You Weak....
-What Praying Does Is Help Your Insurance Policy Grow Stronger In The Area
That You Prayed In....?
-What Praying Does Is Establish A Growing Foundation In The Spirit World and
Beyond...
-But Praying Without Works Is Dead...
-So Dont Pray If You Not Going To Believe And Follow What You Prayed For...
-And When You Receive That Which You Prayed Only Thank The Father And
Continue OnDo You Pray And Act On Your Prayer? I Know I Am.

A Kiss From Her...

In deep affection, my lips await thee.
To dream in time, with the melodies of the heart.
Dance to the music of the soul.
Delight in the caress of gentleness of my lover's kiss.
My soul awaits thee in the morning of my love.
Ah.... but thou are only a message, sent to my heart.
And eagerly, gratefully, accepted for thy words.
Though thou shall be reunited with my touch in time,
I shall embrace small visions of memories and moments that are mine.
In Love is so divine from afar
Til the day all of thee in person is mine




~Angel~

-Her Eyes Hold All Of The Beauty In The Universe...
-Her Voice Is More Soothing Than the Sound Of Rain,
-More Comforting Than the Sound of the Ocean,
-More Beautiful Than All Of The Singing Birds of The World
-And As Perfect As An Angel's Voice...
-Her Eyes Can Freeze Your Every Motion With One Innocent Glance And Take
Your Breathe Away
-Just So She Can Replace Youre Breathe With A Passionate Engulfed Kiss...
-Her Touch Can Impair Any And All Bodily Functions Yet Allow You To Feel Her
Desires And Fall Hopelessly In Love With Her...
-Her Shape Can Tame Any Beast, Any Monster Or Any Man...
-Her Face Shines Brighter Than The Sun...
-And More Beautiful Than The Stars In The Vivid Night Sky...
-Her Entire Existence Is Overwhelmingly Surrounded With Desire And Passion,
-And Glows Brighter Than The Closest Sun,
-She Is More Beautiful Than The Dancing Northern Lights In The Night Sky.
-As She... Is My Angel...
~The Effect~

-When She's Around...I Can't Breathe...I Become All Jell-O Inside.
-My Knees Become As Solid As Water...My Heart Races...I Freeze Up.
-I Can't Talk...I Can't Think...I Get Butterflies As Big As Eagles.
-The Sound Of Her Voice Sets My Heart, Body, Soul And Mind A Flutter.
-I Am Mesmerized By Her Beauty...I Want To Tell Her:
-I Love You.
-You Are The Most Beautiful Woman To Have Ever Graced Life.
-You Mean So Much To Me...Even Though I Don't Know You.
-You Are The Angel I Dream About.
-You Are The Girl Who Consumes My Every Fantasy.
-You Are What I Think An Angel Looks Like.
-I Am So In Love With Your Smile, Youre Voice, Your Face, Your Body, Just...All
Of You.
-I'd Give Up Eternity To be Yours.
-I'd Do Anything For You...Anything That Has To Do With You.
-I'd Hold You.
-I'd Kiss You.
-I'd Embrace And Get Lost Within Your Existence And Your Sheer Beauty.
-I'd Love You So Much.
-You Are A Whole World Unto Your Own.
-This Is What I Go Through When You Enter My Mind.
-You Are My Angel.
-And I Thank God So Much For The Opportunity To Have Known You And For
Your Existence.









~Why I t's Real~

-If a Couple Doesn't Know Why They Love Each Other, Its real...
-Why Is It Real?
-Because It's a Boundless Love...
-Without Any Limitations...
-No Barriers What So Ever...
-No Reasons Why That Love Exists...
-Just a Pure Love That Is Stronger Than Diamonds, Any Metal, Any Stone And
Even Death...
-But What If a Reason Comes Along And Ruins All That?
-And Then That Reason Leaves?
-What's Happens To That Pure Love That Once Existed Between One Another?



~The Logic~

-Love Is Never Without Pain,
-Pain Is Never Without Rewards,
-Rewards Is Never Without Sacrifice,
-Sacrifice Is Never Without Irony,
-Irony Is Never Without Reason,
-Reason Is Never Without Resolve
-Resolve Is Never Without Satisfaction.
-The Logic


~Your Hero~


-Let Me Save You.
-Let Me Save You From The Darkness Of This World And Of The Darkness In
Everyone's Heart.
-Let Me Save You From The Sorrow, The Pain And The Agony Guys Would Install
Into You.
-Let Me Save You From All Those Insipid Feelings That Guys Would Feed You.
-Let Me Save You From Your Past. Let Me Save You From Those Who Fills You
With Doubts And Lies.
-Let Me Save You From Your Goodbyes, From Your Disturbances, From Your
Darkness.
-Let Me Save You From The Delusions This World Places On You.
-I Want To Save You. I Need To Save You. I Can't Lose You.
-Please, Who Ever You Are, Let Me Save You.
-Let Me Keep You Safe. Let Me Make Your Dreams Come True.
-Let Me Protect You From The Evil Of This World.
-Let Me Protect You From 2-Faced People.
-You Are All I Wanted. All I Needed. And All I've Ever Known.
-Let Me Be Your Knight Saving You From The Dragons Of This Prosecuting
World.
-I'll Save You. I'll Love You. I'll Hold You. I'll Take Care Of You.
-I'll Make Things As Safe And Worry-Free As I Can Possibly Get Them.
-You'll Be All Mine. I'll Be All Yours. I Will Never Leave Your Side.
-I Can Save You. I Can Take You Away From Here.
-Just Please Let Me Be...Your Hero.


~My Beautiful Monster~

IT...
Wants You All Dead.
Wants You All To Hurt Like Us.
Want You All To Be Tortured.
Hates All Of You And Your Pitiful Feelings.
IT...
Will Hurt You People.
Will Torture All Of You.
Laughs At You.
Needs To Hurt.
Needs To Make People Cry As People Made Us Cry.
IT...
Wants Me To Die A Thousand Deaths And Will Bring Me Back To Life Just To
Torture Me Worse.
Makes Me Cry.
Makes Me Feel So Low.
Wants To Break Your Heart.
Wants To Chew You Up And Shit You Out Because You Are Nothing.
Will Leave You High And Dry The Moment You Need Me The Most.


IT...
Is My Darkness.
Is My Evil.
Tries To Make Me Kill Myself.
Tries To Make Me Kill Others.
IT...
Will Make You Feel So Low.
Will Make You Want To Die.
Will Torture Your Loved Ones In Front Of Your Eyes And Laugh At All Of You.
Convinces Me That Everyone Is Not Worth Anything But Shit.
IT...
Tells Me I'm Lower Than That.
Is Beautiful.
Is Cruel.
Hates Me More.

IT...
Makes Me Hate Everyone.
Makes Me Lie.
Makes Me Want To Die So I Can't Feel The Pain People Bring.
Makes Me Want To Die So I Won't Be Alone Anymore.

IT...
Convinces Me That I Am Worthless, Boring, Ugly, Unwanted By All, And That I
Am The Reason My Family Dies.
Ruins My Life.
Wants To Ruin Yours.
Makes Suicide Look So Rewarding.
Makes Death Look So Sweet.
IT...
Causes Me To Cry Until I Fall Asleep.
Causes Me To Be Distant From Everyone.
Causes Me To Run Away From Everyone.
Convinces Me That I Do Want To Die Every day.
Hurts Me So Badly.
IT...
Turns My Heart Cold And Desolate.
Turns Everyone Against Me Just When I Need Them So Badly.
Causes Me To Cut Myself.
Is Everyone's Worst Enemy.
Is My Own Worst Enemy.
IT....Is Me.



~Anomaly~
-What Is An Anomaly? Can You Tell Me?
-How Different They Are. How Pure They Are.
-How The Sight They Have Is The Sight No One Else Has.
-Can You See What I See? Can You See Things In Their Purest Form Like Me?
-To Sleep While You're Awake Can Be Rough. To Feel Where No One Else Can Is
A Little Much.
-My Expressions And Feelings Question Me.
-To Dream The Kind Of Dreams You Would While Asleep But Still Awake Puts A
Burden On You.
-Can You Hear Things The Way I Do? If Not, Be Glad.
-Will These Riddles Of My Life Ever Be Solved By Me Or Anyone?
-Will Anyone Listen To Me When I Actually Speak To Them?
-Will Anyone See With The Vision That I Have?
-I Desperately Need Someone To Unlock My Mysteries.
-Can You Feel Like I Do? Can You Describe Me?
-The Only Other That Can Understand Me Is Enigma, My Kind.
-Can Someone Help Me Understand? Or Will I Fail Again?
-Can Anyone Look Into My Soul And Save Me? Or Do I Have To Remain Alone?
-Look Into My Eyes, Tell Me What You See. Take "Him" Away From Me.
-Dig Your Hands Into My Heart, Pull It Out And Make Me Normal.
-My Dreams Are Confusing. My Mind Is A Tornado Of Ideas, Memories, Dreams,
Problems And Blinding Light.
-Why Must I Be Different And Not The Same? Why Can't I Be Like Everyone Else?
-Special, Is My Being, My Eyes, My Heart, Soul, Mind And Mouth.
-People Are Scared Of What They Do Not Understand. I Am The Anomaly In
Human Form.
-Will Anyone Love And Accept Me With How I Am? Or Am I To Remain Alone?
-Maybe No One Else Can Handle Me In Their Life. Maybe No Love Is Made For
Me.
-Just Maybe...I Am Destined To Be...Alone.
-The Light In Your Eyes Is The Sun In My World.
-Voices In My Head Keeps Whispering Me Away From You.








~Hope~
-To Fight When You Can't Even Move. To Live When All Is Taken Away.
-To Stay Alive When Death Is Breathing Down Your Neck.
-To Fight For Someone When The Deck Is Immensely Stacked Against You.
-To Grow Stronger When All Strength Is Striped Away Like Clothes.
-To Know You Can Go More Than Humanly Possible When Despair Is All That
Consumes You.
-To Live For That Someone Even Though They May Never Come Back.
-To Be Strong In A World Of Weakness. To Care When You Are Hated.
-To Not Care When People Degrade You. To Fight Back When You Are Out
Numbered.
-To Believe When Lies Are All That Is Taught. To Cry When All Your Feelings Go
Numb.
-To Laugh When Sadness Is What You Are Now Made Up Of. To Love In A World
Of Hatred.
-And To Ascend When All Try To Bring You Down.
-What Is Your Hope?





WHERE ARE YOU?
TO BE ABLE TO SUCCEED IN LIFE, YOU HAVE TO UNDERSTAND THAT
PRESSURE WILL BE CREATED OBSTACLES WILL PRESENT
THEMSELVES AND CAN BE OVERCOME!
WHEN YOU ARE SURE OF YOUR ABILITY AND KNOW YOU ARE AND
DECIDE TO BE THE BEST IN YOUR FIELD AND HAVE NO FEAR OF
COMPETITION OR OBSTACLES, THEN YOU CAN SUCCEED!
WHEN YOU CANT DETERMINE THE OUTCOME, YOU CAN JUST
NARROW YOUR MINDSET DOWN TO FEAR OF SUCCEEDING!
WHERE ARE YOU?













LAST CHANCE
I HAVE BEEN SENDING YOU DIFFERENT EMOTIONAL MESSAGES THIS
APPEARS TO BE YOUR WEAK POINT!
YOU LACK EMOTIONAL MUSCLE
YOU FAIL TO UNDERSTAND SUCCESS FULFILLMENT RATIO
YOU WILL NOT MAKE A GOOD DECISION TO CHANGE YOUR LIFE
THE BOTTOM LINE IS WHY DO YOU MAKE IT SO HARD-WHEN IT CAN
BE SO EASY
THE ANSWER
THE EMOTIONAL CIRCLE THAT YOU RUN INCLUDES PEOPLE WHO
SHARE YOUR SAME PROBLEM!
CHANGE.CHANGE.CHANGE.CHANGE.CHANGE.
YOU WILL FIND YOUR ANSWER!
TAKE A DAY OFF FROM WORK!
GO OUT AND DO SOMETHING FOR YOURSELF!
DONT TAKE THE CAR!
DONT DO ANY WORK FOR ANYBODY!
DONT TELL ANYONE WHERE YOU ARE GOING!
GET SOME FRESH AIR - FREE YOUR MIND - ENJOY YOUR DAY!
IT ISNT ABOUT THE MONEY HOW MUCH HAVE YOU LOSS
BECAUSE YOU CONTINUE WORRYING AND TAKING CARE OF
EVERYONE ELSE INSTEAD OF YOURSELF!



















A Son To His Father on Father's Day...

Perhaps we'll never understand each other.
On some levels and in some ways
Loving doesn't mean that we always agree and stay on the same page
There are things I know, and Things I'll never see.
I'm sure your heart knows these things in of which I speak.
I know you only wanted to impart the things that I don't yet know:
The pain of loving a reluctant son;
The anger, coming fast and building slow yet with love still there,
Of being helpless to control someone who seems like is never there
You want only that I grow up right,
Because you know what right is, and I sometimes still don't.
I have to learn to wield my own inner light,
And if I follow yours,
I would never know my own fight
I'm sorry for the anger that was in the air;
Im sorry that sometimes I wasnt there or you though I seemed to not care
Im sorry for the times where I felt I hated you for the past
When In fact Im glad your love, and your pride made me last
Im sorry for not being there when you wanted to spend time with me
The fact is I became mad at me.
Although we have fought back and forth so far from a distance
Im glad and proud to have a father that cares and fights so hard as much as you
I see fathers nowadays and they just dont have a clue
I guess in this new age we are all out of touch.
Although we are so different in many ways
Your love for me has never changed.
You will always be my father, and I your son
Through a blood connection we are always one.
I dont want you to ever depart from me one day
And I not tell you how much Im glad your love from me didnt change.
So lastly what I want to say,
I Have A Happy Fathers Day

YOU ARE BLESSED & LOVED ALWAYS
Your Son
















A Kiss by the Fountain

By the fountain as she held my hands in hers,
Passion filled my soul.
As we sat talking by the fountain,
Our warmth and friendship grew.
I felt myself yearning to be kissed,
Amidst the crowd of people there.
We snuggled closer together, as we talked.
Our happiness filled the air.
All at once, the crowd seemed to disappear,
And our Passion seemed to grow.
Happiness and Joy overwhelmed me
As she kissed my soft lips so slow.
An invitation of something more
As our lips joined together again.
Her soft kisses and passion
Released my joy and unlocked my heart inside.
As the beautiful fountain sprayed around us,
Glory filled our souls.























Let Love Come Your Way

Sometime we wonder when to start anew.
Holding back, waiting, for that chance,
for a special person to come into our life.
To make things seem more worthwhile.
Why not take the first chance step?
You've nothing left to lose!
For, but taking chances things happen,
To our existence we once knew.
Try out new places that excite your soul.
Look deep into one's eyes and find the love.
Touch a shoulder, share a kiss, and find the new you.
Come out of the shelter of your soul.
You'll find others like yourself,
Waiting to welcome you in love.
When you do, you'll find life begins anew.
Give away the magic of your love.
Let love come your way!
Find the happiness of sharing yourself today!




The Date

While they play sitting at their keyboards
Flipping through the personals
His eyes stop on one..."Need a Little Sparkle?" it read,
And Boy Do I.... he thought!
They he began to read the personal.
"She knows what she wants, he thought.
"And she has lots of passion too!"
She's romantic and likes the better things of life,
Yet takes time for small pleasures too, like rainbows and sunsets,
And holding hands and walking along the beach, he read.
"Uuuummm," he thought....
She 's looking for a passionate man who's romantic and kind
One that knows how to treat a lady..."Aha," he sighed.
Maybe she is ok! And she likes short men, thats just great!!!!
Think I will write her a note today.
She opens his email smiling, and began to read.
What a smile, it would add sparkles from the moon.
What an attitude, she dances to her own tune.
But, to share with her, a waltz across the floor.
Would make me want to kiss her, even more.
Ummm, she thought. He sounds like just what the doctor ordered.
She happily closed the email.... and saw his name pop up...
In the Buddy list...."My there he is..." she thought.
"Can't wait to chat with this passionate guy."
Well, a little time when on, and few more chats,
And Saturday came.... And she got brave.
When are you coming to see me? She asked.
How about 6 pm? He said with a sigh...
And so they decided they would meet for a while.
Ihop was the place and the hour was 6 pm.
He crossed the parking lot with a smile; she met him with a hug...
And in they went to chat for a while....
First of all, her eyes were brown as they beckon to her Brown skin...come play with
me.
The butterflies flew through them, while they giggled and stared,
And imagined things about each other there.
The time went fast and it was soon time to go....
Then time for so long and the goodnight kiss.
The kisses, yes the kisses were wonderful,
And wanting for more. But it was late and time to go.
And off they went, in their own little way.
Better to have found a friend to meet for a while, than home on the Web....
For there is no hug or kiss from a cold computer screen.
Hopeful for another chance to spend,
The time and warmth of a new loving friend.