NOFEARTheCanterburyTales

GeneralPrologue
(ModernEnglishTranslation)



DIRECTIONS:Thebelowreadingiswritteninmoremodernlanguageversuswhatyouhavein
yourtextbook.However,thereadingcomprehensionquestionswithlinenumbersandpage
numbersarebasedonwhatispresentedinyourtextbook.Usebothtoassistyouincompleting
theguidedcomprehensionquestions.Seeinstructorifyouhavequestions.

Peoplewanttogoonreligiouspilgrimagestospiritualplacesinthespringtime,whentheApril
rainshavesoakeddeepintothedrygroundtowatertheflowersrootsandwhenZephyrus,the
godofthewestwind,hashelpednewflowerstogroweverywhereandwhenyoucanseethe
constellationAriesintheskyandwhenthebirdssingallthetime.Somepeoplegotoother
countries,butmanypeopleinEnglandchoosetogotothecityofCanterburyinsoutheastern
EnglandtovisittheremainsofThomasBecket,theChristianmartyrwhohadthepowerof
healingpeople.

Onespring,whenIwasmakingmyownhumblepilgrimagetoCanterbury,IstayedattheTabard
InninthecityofSouthwark.WhileIwasthere,agroupoftwentyninepeoplewhowerealso
makingthesamepilgrimagearrivedatthehotel.Noneofthemhadreallyknowneachother
before,buttheyhadmetalongtheway.Itwasaprettydiversegroupofpeoplefromdifferent
walksoflife.Thehotelwasspaciousandhadplentyofroomforallofus.Istartedtalkingwith
thesepeopleandprettysoonfitrightintotheirgroup.Wemadeplanstogetupearlyand
continueonthejourneytoCanterburytogether.ButbeforeIbeginmystory,Ishouldprobablytell
youallaboutthetwentyninepeopleinthisgroupwhotheywere,whattheydidforaliving,and
whattheywereallwearing.Illstartbytellingyouabouttheknight.

TherewasanhonorableKNIGHT,whohaddevotedhislifetochivalry,truth,andjustice.Hehad
foughtforhiskinginmanywarsthroughoutEuropeandtheMiddleEastandhadwonmany
awardsforhisbravery.Thisknighthadbeenthereanddoneitall.Hehadhelpedconquerthecity
ofAlexandriainEgyptin1365andhaddinedwithroyaltyinPrussiaonmanyoccasions.Hed
foughtinLithuaniaandRussiamoretimesthananyotherChristianknight.Hedbeenatthe
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siegeofAlgecirasinGrenada,Spain,andhadconqueredenemiesinNorthAfricaandEastern
Europe.HedbeenallovertheMediterraneanSea.Hedbeeninfifteenbattlesthreeofthem
againsttheheathensofAlgeriaandhedneverlostonce.Thisknighthadevenfoughtwiththe
pagankingofIstanbulinTurkeyagainstanothernonChristian.Despitehishugesuccessand
hisnoblelineage,hewaspractical,selfdisciplined,andhumble.Neverhadhesaidanythingbad
aboutanotherperson.Hetrulywasthemostperfectknightineverywaypossible.Now,totell
youabouthisclothes.Herodefinequalityhorses,buthedidntwearflashyclothes.Heworea
simplecottonshirtthathadstainsalloveritfromthechainmailhedworninthewarhedwon
justbeforestartingoutonthepilgrimagetoCanterbury.

Theknightssonwasalsowithus,ayoungSQUIREboywhowashisfathersassistant.Hewas
agentle,happyboywhowaswellonhiswaytobecomingaknighthimself.Hewasabouttwenty
yearsold,ofaverageheight,andhadverycurlyhair.Hewasalsoverystrongandphysicallyfit.
HedservedinthearmyinsomewarsinHollandandFranceandhadwonhonorstheretoo,
whichhehopedwouldimpressthegirlheloved.Infact,hewassomadlyinlovewiththisgirlthat
hecouldntevensleepatnight.Heworeaverycolorfullongshirtthathadwidesleeves,andit
lookedlikeafieldfullofredandwhiteflowers.Youcouldtellhewasyoungandcarefreebecause
hesangandplayedthefluteallday.Hedwritepoetryandsongs,draw,dance,andjoust.Allin
all,hewasaniceyoungmanhumble,polite,andalwayswillingtohelpouthisdad.

AYEOMAN,orservant,accompaniedtheknightandhisson,andsincehewastheonlyservant
withthem,hegottorideoneofhismastershorses.Thisservantworeagreenhoodedjacket
andcarriedabowandabundleofarrowsmadewithbrightpeacockfeathers.Thequalityofthe
peacockfeathersalonetoldyouthathewasaprettymeticulousguywhoalwayspaidattentionto
thelittledetails.Hewasalsoanexcellentwoodworker.Hehadtanskin,shorthair,andworea
wristguardandasharp,shinydagger.HealsoworeasilverSaintChristophersmedalaround
hisneckandahuntinghornwithagreenstrapoverhisshoulder.Healsocarriedaswordanda
shield.Iguesshewasaforesterwhospendalotoftimeinthewoods.

TherewasalsoaPRIORESS,anunnamedMadameEnglantine,whoranaconvent.Shehada
sweetandmodestsmileandwasveryfriendlyandeasytogetalongwith.Shesanghymnskind
ofthroughhernose,whichactuallysoundedprettygood.ShespokeFrenchfluentlythoughstill
withanEnglishaccent.Shepridedherselfonherpropermannersandetiquette.Forexample,
shealwaysservedherselfsmallportionsandtooksmallbitesoffoodsothatnonewouldfallout
ofhermouthorgetherfingerstoomessy.Andbeforetakingadrink,shewoulddabherlipwitha
napkinsothatfooddidntgetalloverhercup.Shewenttogreatlengthstoappearwellmannered
andworthyofbeingaprioress.Shewasoneofthosepeoplewhofeltsostronglyforothersthat
shewouldburstintotearsifshesawamousecaughtinatrap.Infact,theonlytimeshedswear
wouldbetosayBySaintLoy!Shehadafewsmalldogswithherandwouldfeedthemonlythe
finestfoodroastedmeat,milk,finebread.Shedcryifoneofthosedogsdiedorwasabusedby
someoneelse.Shereallydidwearherheartonhersleeve.Shehadafinenose,brighteyes,a
smallredmouth,andabroadforehead.Infact,herforeheadwasalmostaswideasthespanof
myhand,sinceshewasagoodsizedwoman.Sheworeaprettycloakandawellpressedcloth
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aroundherneck.Aroundherarmsheworearosarymadeofcoralandgreenbeads,andonthis
stringofbeadshungagoldenbroochwiththeletterAandtheinscriptionAmorvincit
onmnialoveconquersall.Shewasaccompaniedbythreepriestsandanothernun,whowas
herassistant.

TherewasalsoaMONK,asplendidchap,whoinspectedhismonasteryslands.Hewasa
mansmanwholovedtohuntandwhomightonedaybecometheheadofhismonastery.He
keptmanyeleganthorses,andwhenherodethemyoucouldheartheirbridlebellsjingleas
clearlyasthebellsofhismonastery.Helikedallthingsmodernandnewanddidntcareforold
things,especiallySt.Benedictsrulethatmonksshouldlivesimplyanddevotethemselvesto
prayerandwork.Hedidntgiveadamnforthenotionthatsaysmonkscantbehuntersor
anythingbutchurchmen.Imyselfagreedwithhim.Whyshouldhedrivehimselfcrazyreading
booksandworkinginsideallthetime?Howisthatgoingtoaccomplishanythinguseful?Tohell
withSt.Augustinesstupidrules.Instead,themonkwasahorseman,andhekeptfast
greyhounds.Helovedtogohunting,andhisfavoritecatchwasafinefatswan.Hesparedno
expensepursuingthishobby.Itwasthereforenosurprisetoseethatthefinestfurlinedthecuffs
ofhissleevesorthatheusedafancygoldenpintofastenhishood.Infact,itappearedtobea
loveknot,asymbolofenduringlove.Hehadashinybaldheadandhisfaceseemedtoglisten.
Hiseyesrolledaboutinhisheadandseemedtoburnlikefire.Hisbrownhorsewaswell
groomed,hisbootswerewellworn,andhisskinlookedhealthy,notpalelikeaghosts.Indeed,
hewasafinelookingchurchman.

TherewasalsoaFRIAR,wholivedhappilyandexcessively..Hewasabeggar,butasweet
talkingone.Ofallthefriarsintheworld,hewasthemostplayful.Hewasthebestbeggarintown
andwassosmooththathecouldevengetthepoorestlittleoldladiestogivehimmoney.Asa
result,hemademoremoneythanheactuallyneeded,whichmeantthathecouldplaylikea
puppyalldaylong.Hewasgoodatresolvinglegaldisputestoo,anddidanddidsowearingthick,
bellshapedrobesthatweresosplendidhelookedlikethepopeinsteadofapoorfriar.Heeven
pretendedtohavealisptomakehimselfsoundmoredignified.Hehadmarriedoffmanyyoung
ladiesmuchtohisowndismay.Oh,hewasoneoftheChurchsfinestallright!Alltheguysin
townandthewomentoothoughthewasjustgreatbecause,ashehimselfputit,therewas
noonewhocouldhearconfessionsbetterthanhecould.Allyouhadtodowassliphimsome
changeandhedswearupanddownthatyouwerethemostpenitentpersonthateverlived,no
matterwhatyouddoneorhowsorryyoureallywere.Andsincebribesareeasierthanactual
remorse,thisguyhadalotofnicestuff,includingafairamountofjewelryinhisrobesthathed
usetowootheladies.Hecouldalsoplaythefiddleandsingthesweetestsongswithatwinklein
hiseye.Heknewallthebarsintownandeverybartenderandbarmaidtoo.Heknewthemmuch
better,infact,thanheknewanyofthelepersorbeggarwomenorotherpoorpeoplewhomhe
wassupposedtobehelping.Itwouldnthavebeenfittingforhim,thepowerfulmanthathewas,
tobeseenwithsuchpeople.Besides,theresnomoneytobemadehangingoutwiththelikesof
them.Instead,hedspendallhistimewiththewealthy,flatteringthemsothattheywouldgive
himmoney.Nope,noonewasmorevirtuous!

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TherewasalsoaMERCHANTwhohadaforkedbeardandworeclothesthatlookedlikea
jesters.ThisbusinessmanworeabeaverhatfromHollandandhadexpensivelookingboots.He
spokeveryseriously,makingsurethateveryoneknewhowwealthyandsuccessfulhewas.He
wasparticularlyobsessedwithmakingsurethatthenavymaintainedorderintheNorthSea
betweenEnglandandHolland.HeplayedthemarketswellandsoldalotofDutchmoneyin
currencyexchanges.Thisguywasprettysmartallright:Hecarriedhimselfsowellthatnoone
suspectedhewasreallyheavilyindebt.Whatever.Hewasactuallyagoodguy,anditstoobadI
neverlearnedhisname.

TherewasanOXFORDCLERIC,whostudiedphilosophy.Hishorsewasasleanasarake,
andsowasheforthatmatter.Helookedhollowandserious.Heworeathreadbarecloak
becausehedidntmakeanymoney.Hedidnthaveajobbecausehedidntwantone.Hedrather
owntwentyphilosophybooksthanhaveniceclothesornicethings.Heusedallthemoneyhis
friendsgavehimtobuybooks,andheprayedforthesoulsofhisfriendsforhelpinghimto
pursuehispassion.Notsurprisingly,hespentmostofhistimereading.Hewaspolite,buthe
spokeonlywhenitwasnecessaryandimportanttodoso.Hisspeecheswereshortandquick
butveryinsightfulandoftenaboutmorality.Hewasbotheagertolearnandeagertoteach.

TherewasaSERGEANTOFLAW,whowasbothwiseandslightlysuspiciousofeverything.He
spentalotofhistimeconsultingwithhisclientsoutsideSt.PaulsCathedralinLondon.Hewas
verywiseandwellrespectedandchosehiswordscarefullywhenhespoke.Hehadservedas
thejudgeinacriminalcourtbefore,andhisvastknowledgeandwisdomhadmadehimfamous.
Hedearnedalotofmoneyasajudgeandhadbecomeagreatandpowerfullandowner.Hehad
memorizedallofthelaws,courtcases,anddecisionsinEnglandoverthelast300yearsand
couldthereforewritethemostperfectlegaldocument.Hewasanincrediblybusypersonbut
alwaysmadehimselflookbusierthanhereallywas.Hetraveledinasimplemulticoloredcoat
thatwastiedtogetherwithasilkbeltandsomesmallpins.AndthatsallIreallyhavetosay
abouthisclothing.

ThejudgetraveledwithaFRANKLIN.Hehadafleshyredfaceandasnowwhitebeard.He
lovedtoeatapieceofbreadsoakedinwineforbreakfasteverymorning.Hewasanepicurean
andbelievedthatthepleasuresoftheworldbringtruehappiness.Heownedalargehouseand
frequentlyentertainedguestswhocamefrommilesaround.Healwayshadthebestbreadand
beer,andtherewassomuchmeatandfishthatitmusthaverainedwineandhailedfoodathis
house.Healsolikedtomixuphisdietaccordingtotheseasons.Hischickencoopswere
actuallyfilledwithpartridgesandhisstewesfilledwithfish.Ipitythechefwhoservedhimbland
food!Hisdiningroomtablewasalwaysloadedwithfoodnomatterwhattimeofdayitwas.He
woreadaggerandawhitepurse.HewasapowerfulmemberofParliamentandaformersheriff.
Nowherewasthereamoreworthylandowner.

TherewasalsoaHABERDASHERahatmakeraCARPENTER,aWEAVER,aclothing
DYER,andaTAPESTRYMAKER.Thesemenallbelongedtothesameworkingmensunion,
calledaFRATERNITYGUILD.Becausetheybelongedtothesameguild,theyallworethe
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sameclothingtoo,whichseemedtohavebeenmadejustrecently.Theyworeexpensive
accessories,includingpurses,belts,andevenfancykniveswithhandlesmadeofpuresilver.
Eachofthemseemedlikehecouldhavebeenapowerfulleaderoftheirguildorevenatown
council.Theywerecertainlyallwiseenoughandwealthyenoughtodoso.Theirwiveswouldno
doubthavepushedthemtotakesuchpositionsofpowerbecausetheytoowouldbenefitfrom
beingmarriedtomenofsuchprestige.

TheguildsmenbroughtaCOOKwiththemtomakethemtastydishesontheirjourneyspicy
chickensandtartsandwhatnot.Thecookcertainlyknewagoodbeerwhenhesawoneand
couldroast,broil,fry,andstewwiththebestofthem.Hischickenstew(blancmange)was
particularlygood.Toobadhehadanastysoreonhisleg.

TherewasalsoaSKIPPER,whocamefromtheWest,maybeasfarawayasthecityof
Dartmouth.Heworeacheapshirtthatcamedowntohisknees,andherodeanold,shabby
horse.Healsoworeadaggertiedtoastrapthathungacrosshischest.Hehadjustrecently
broughtoverawinemerchantfromBordeauxonhisshiptheMagdalenandhadgottentan
andmorethanalittledrunkduringthevoyage.Hewasagoodguy,butdidntlethisconscience
botherhim.Whenhewonbattlesatseahewouldreleasehiscaptives.Hewasanexcellent
navigatortooandknewhowtoreadthestarsbetterthananyotherman.Hecouldsailinany
watersandknewallthesafespotsfromTunisiaandSpaintoSweden.Hewashardyandhad
weatheredmanystorms.Hewasbothwiseandpracticalineverythinghedid.

TherewasalsoamedicalDOCTORwithus,thebestdoctorinthewholeworld.Thisdoctor
knewastrologyandtheworkingsofthenaturalworldandwouldonlytreathispatientswhenit
wasastrologicallysafetodoso.Heknewthemovementoftheplanetsandhadstudiedallthe
greattheoriesofdiseaseandmedicine.Heknewthecauseofeverydiseaseandwhereitcame
from.Hewasreallyagreatdoctor.Oncehedfiguredoutwhichdiseasehispatienthad,he
immediatelygavehimthecure.Heandthepharmacistshadquitetheracketgoingandwere
quicktoprescribedrugssothattheydbothprofit.Heatesimplefoodthatwasnutritiousand
easytodigestnothingmoreandhemostlyreadtheBible.Heworebrightredandblue
clothesmadeofthefinestwovensilk,buthesavedtherestofhismoneybecausehereally
lovedgoldmorethananythingelse.

TherewasaWIFEfromthecityofBATH(WIFEOFBATH),England.Shehadastriking,noble
facethathadareddishtinttoit,though,sorrytosay,shehadagapinherfrontteethandwasa
littlebitdeaf.Sheworeahatthatwasaswideasashield,sharpspurs,andapleatedcloakover
herlegstokeepthemudoffherdress.Shealsoworetightlylacedredstockingsand
comfortablenewshoes,andherkerchiefsweremadeofhighqualityfabric.Infact,theonesshe
woreonherheadeverySundayweresonicetheymusthaveweighedtenpounds.Shewasso
goodatweavingcloththatshewasevenbetterthanthefamousweaversfromthecitiesof
YpresandGhentinBelgium.Shedlivedanhonorablelifeandhadmarriedfivetimes,not
countingherotherboyfriendsshedhadwhenshewasyoungthoughtheresnoneedtotalk
aboutthatnow.Shewasthekindofwomanwhoalwayswantedtobethefirstwifeatchurchto
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makeadonationtohelpthepoorbutwouldgetangryandkeephermoneyifanywomanmadea
donationbeforeshedid.Sherodeherhorsewellandknewalotabouttravelingbecauseshed
beentosomanyforeignplaces.ShedbeentoJerusalemthreetimes,forexample.Shedalso
beenonreligiouspilgrimagestothecitiesofRomeandBologneinItaly,totheshrineofSt.
JamesinSpain,andtoCologne,France.Shewasagoodconversationalistandlikedtolaugh
andgossipwiththeothers.Shecouldtelllotsofstories,especiallyromanticones,becauseshe
wasanoldprowhenitcametolove.

TherewasalsoapoorPARSON,thepriestofaruralcountychurch.Hewasagoodman,a
personwhothoughtonlyholythoughtsanddidonlygooddeeds.Hewasverygentle,diligent,
andalwayspatientinthefaceofadversity.Hewouldntlookdownonanyofhispoorparishioners
fornotdonatingmoneytothechurch.Infact,hedrathergivethemwhatlittlemoneyhehimself
had,especiallysincehelivedhappilyonverylittle.Hedidntthinkhimselfbetterthanothers,but
hewouldscoldpeopleforbeingtoostubbornintheirways.Thecountywherehelivedwaslarge
andthehouseswerespreadfarapart,butthatdidntstophimfromvisitingeveryoneofhis
parishioners,richorpoor.Withhiswalkingstickinhand,hedmakehisroundsfromhouseto
housenomatterwhat,evenifhewassickoritwasraining.Hetrulywastheembodimentofthe
teachingsofJesusChrist.Helivedashepreached,whichsettheperfectexampleforhis
parishioners,hisflockofsheep.Helivedbythemotto,Ifgoldrusts,whatwouldirondo?by
whichhemeant,Thepriestmustliveaholylifeifheexpectsordinarypeopletoliveholylivesall
hopeislostifheturnsouttobecorrupt.Itsashamewheneveryouseeafilthyshepherd
watchingovercleansheep,whichiswhypriestsshouldlivebyexampletoshowtheirsheephow
tolive.Theparsonremainedloyaltohisparishionersandwouldneverthinkaboutleavingthem
foramoreprestigiouspostinLondonortomakemoremoneyworkingforachurchonawealthy
landownersestate.Hewasntinterestedinwealthorstatusandwasntobsessedwiththe
philosophyofethicsormorality.No,hewasmerelyasimpleshepherdwhosoughttosavethe
soulsofhisflockbylivingagoodlifehimselfandsettingagoodexample.Ibelievehewasthe
finestpriestintheworld.

TherewasalsoaPLOWMANinourgroup,whowasactuallytheparsonsbrother.Heworea
simpleshirtandrodeuponahorse.Hewasalowlylaborerwhoworkedwithhishands.Hislove
forGodwasalwaysforemostinhisthoughts,whenhewasbothhappyandsad.Healsothought
abouttheneedsandwantsofotherpeopleandhadjustasmuchloveforothersashehadfor
himself.Hehadcartedmanyloadsofmanureandwoulddigandworkhard,allfortheloveof
Godandhumanityifhecould.Hedonatedagoodpercentageofhisincomeandthevalueofhis
otherpropertytotheChurchonaregularbasis.Hewasagoodandloyalmanwholivedin
happinessandpeace.

TheMILLERwasshort,buthewasstillaprettybigguymuscular,broad,andbigboned.He
likedtoprovehowstronghewasbywrestlingotherpeoplewhereverhewent,andhealways
wonthematches.Therewasntadoorhecouldnteitherripoffitshingesorbreakdownwitha
runningheadbutt.Heworeawhitecoatwithabluehoodandcarriedaswordandsmallshieldat
hisside.Helovedtotalk,andhecouldtellthebestbarstories,mostofthemaboutsexandsin.
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Hewouldstealcornandthensellitforthreetimesitsworth.Hehadabeardthatwasasredas
afoxandaboutthesamesizeandshapeasagardeningspade.Hehadawidemouthdeep,
gapingnostrilsandawartonthetipofhisnosethatbristledwithredhairsthatlookedlikethey
grewoutofapigsears.Hecouldplaythebagpipeswell,andheplayedforusaswelefttown.

TherewasalsoaMANCIPLE(anofficerwhobuysprovisionsforacollege,monastery,orother
institution),aclerkinchargeofbuyingfoodandprovisionsfortheInnerTemple,oneofthecourts
inLondon.Othermanicplescouldreallylearnfromthisguy,whowassocarefulaboutwhathe
purchasedandwhathespentthathealwayssavedalotofmoney.Heworkedforthirtylawyers,
allofwhomwereverysmartandeducatedinthelaw.Atleastadozenofthemmanagedthe
wealthandlandsofsomeofthemostpowerfularistocratsinEngland.Theirjobwastohelpthe
lordssavemoneyandhelpkeepthemoutdebt.Andyetthemanciplewaswiserwithmoney
thanallofthem!ItsproofofGodsgracethatanuneducatedmanwithnaturalintelligence,such
asthismanciple,canbesmarterandmoresuccessfulthansomeofthemosteducatedmen.

ThentherewastheREEVE,anoverseerwholookedafterhismasterslandsandpropertyinthe
townofBawdeswellinNorfolk,England.Hewasabadtemperedguywhogotangryeasily.The
haironhisheadwasclippedveryshortlikeapriestsandnearlyshavedcleanaroundhisears.
Healsohadaneatlytrimmedbeard,whichwasalsoshavedprettyclose.Hewastalland
slenderandhadganglylegsthatlookedlikesticksyoucouldntevenseehiscalves.Hedbeen
inchargeofhismastersestatesincehewastwentyyearsold.Hewasverymeticulousabout
hisjob,andnoonecouldfaulthimforbeinginaccurate.Healwaysknewhowmuchgrainwasin
thegranaryandcouldfigureoutcropyieldsinadvancebasedonsolelyonhowmuchrainhad
fallenthatyear.Hekneweveryoneofhislordshorses,chickens,cows,sheep,andpigs.Allthe
otherpeasantswhoworkedforthelandlordwereterrifiedofthereevebecausehecouldtell
whentheywerelyingortryingtocheathim.Hedbeenacarpenterwhenhewasyoungerand
wasstillprettygoodatit.Hehadahouseunderneathsomeshadetreesinthemiddleofa
meadow.Heknewmoreaboutmoneyandpropertythanhismaster,whichishowhewasable
tosaveupasmallfortuneovertheyears.Italsohelpedthathedbeenquietlytrickinghismaster
allalong,bylendinghimthingshealreadyowned,forexample,andthentakingthemasters
thankyougiftsinreturn.Herodeasturdyplowhorse,adappledgreynamedScot,andworea
rustysword.Heworealongbluecoatthatheworedrapedaroundhim,whichmadehimlooklike
thefriar.Herodelastinourgroup.

TherewasalsoaSUMMONERtravelingwithus,amanwhoworkedasabailiffinareligious
court.Hehadafireredfacejustlikealittleangelsbecausehehadsomanypimples.Hewasa
prettysketchyguywhoscaredlittlekidsbecauseofhisscabbyblackeyebrowsandhisscraggily
beard.Therewasntamedicineorointmentintheworldthatcouldgetridofthepimplesand
boilsonhisface.Helikedtoeatgarlic,onions,andleeksanddrinkwinethatwasasredas
blood.Andwhenhedgetgoodanddrunk,hedgoaboutshoutinglikecrazyinLatin.Hereally
onlyknewafewwordsinLatin,onlybecauseheheardthejudgessaythemdayinanddayoutin
thecourtroom.Hedrepeatthemoverandoverlikeaparrot.Andifanyonechallengedhimby
askingtosaysomethingelseinLatin,hedsimplyrepeatthesamequestionoverandover:
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Questioquidjuris?whichmeant,Iwonderwhichlawappliesinthissitutation?Hewasa
friendlyguywhodloanhisgirlfriendtoyouforayearforabottleofwine,probablybecausehe
knewhecouldsecretlyfindanothergirlontheside.Hehadalltheladiesofthecourtwrapped
aroundhislittlefingerAndifhecaughtanothermancheating,hedtellhimnottoworryabout
beingpunishedbytheChurchbecauseallhehadtodowaspayabribe.Onthissubject,though,
Iknowhewaslying.Everyoneshouldfearexcommunication.Hewasridingaroundwitha
garlandonhisheadtobefunny,andhecarriedaroundacakethathepretendedtobehisshield.

WiththesummonerrodeaPARDONERfromthehospitalatRouncivallenearLondon,aman
whosoldofficialpardonstocriminalsafterhearingtheirconfessionstoGod.Hehadeyesthat
poppedoutofhisheadlikearabbitsandavoicethatsoundedlikethebleatingofagoat.He
didnthaveabeardeither,andIdontthinkheeverwillhaveone.Hisfacewasalwaysassmooth
asifhehadjustshaven.Histhinblondhairwasasyellowaswaxandhunginstraight,stringy
wispsfromhishead.Justforfun,hekepthishoodpackedupinhisbag,thinkingthatwithoutit
hedlookcoolerandmorestylishwithhishairfallingoverhisshoulders.Instead,heworeonlya
capthathadapatchsewnonit,showingthathedbeentoRometoseetheveilofSt.Veronica
withJesusfaceonit.Infact,hedjustcomebackfromRome,andthebaghecarriedonhislap
wasstuffedfulloflettersofpardonforhimtosell.Heandthesummonerwereclosefriendsand
togetherwouldbeltoutroundsofthesongComehere,mylove.Notevenatrumpetwashalf
asloudasthesummoner.Imprettysurethepardonerwaseitheraeunuchorgay.Still,hewas
oneofthemostinterestingpardonersinallofEngland.Hecarriedapillowcaseinhisbagthathe
claimedcontainedabunchofholyobjects,includingMarysveil,apieceofcanvasfromthesails
ofSaintPetersfishingboat,acrucifixmadeofbrassandjewels,andevenajarofpigbones.He
couldmakemoremoneyinadaychargingcountrybumpkinsandprieststoseetheserelics
thanthosepriestscouldearnintwomonths.Andso,throughflatteryanddeceithedmakefools
outofthecountryfolkandtheirpriests.But,togivehimcredit,hetookchurchgoingseriouslyand
couldreadlessonsandstoriesfromtheBiblewell.Andhewasbestatsingingtheoffertorysong
becauseheknewhehadtosingloudlyandhappilyifhewantedpeopletodonatetheirmoney.

So,nowIvetoldyouasbestIcaneverythingaboutthepeopleinourlittlegroupwhotheywere,
whattheylookedlike,whattheywore,andwhywewerealltogetherintheTabardInninthecity
ofSouthwark,England.Next,Imgoingtotellyouaboutwhatwealldidthatnightafterwed
checkedintothehotel,andafterthatIlltellyouabouttherestofourpilgrimagetoCanterbury.
Butfirst,IhavetoaskforyourforgivenessandnotthinkmevulgarwhenItellyouwhatthese
peoplesaidanddid.Ivegottotellyouthesethingsexactlyhowtheyhappenedandrepeatthese
storieswordforwordasbestIcansothatyougetthefactsstraightwithoutanyofmy
interpretation.JesusChristtolditlikeitisinthescriptures,andthatwasntconsideredtobe
vulgar.AndPlatosays(tothepeoplewhocanreadGreekanyway)thatwordsmustmatchthe
actionsascloselyaspossible.Ialsobegyourforgivenessifmystorytellingchangesyour
perceptionofthekindsofpeoplethesetravelerswere:Imreallynotthatclever,yousee.

OurHOST,theowneroftheTabardInn,welcomedallofusandservedusdinnerrightaway.
Thefoodwasreallygoodandthewinereallystrong,whichweallweregratefulfor.Thehost
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seemedlikehewasagoodenoughinnkeepertohaveevenbeenabutlerinsomegreathouse.
Hewas100%man,bigandwithbulgingeyesbiggerthananyofthemerchantsinthemarkets
ofLondon,thatsforsure.Hespokeinastraightforwardmannerthatconveyedhiswisdomand
hislearning.Hewasalsoprettyjolly,andafterdinnerhestartedtellingjokesandfunny
storiesafterwedpaidthebill,ofcourseandsaid,Gentlemen,Iwelcomeyoufromthe
bottomofmyheart.Totellyouthetruth,wehaventhadaslargeagroupofpeopleallyearwho
seemashappyasyou.IwishIcouldthinkofsomewaytoentertainyou,andoh,wait!Ive
thoughtofsomethingand,bestofall,itwontcostyouapenny!

YouareallgoingtoCanterbury,wherethemartyr,ThomasBecketwillhearyourprayersand
blessyou.Godbewithyouandspeedyouonyourway!Well,Ifigurethatyoullprobablytell
storiesandwhatnottopassthetimeduringyourjourneybecauseitdbeprettyboringotherwise.
IsaidbeforethatIwanttoentertainyou,sowithyourpermission,IaskthatyoulistentowhatI
havetosay.AndIswearonmyfathersgravethatifyouarententertainedasyourideoffto
Canterburytomorrow,youcanhavemyownhead!Nowholdupyourhands,anddontsay
anotherword!

Ididnttakelongforustodecidetodoasheasked,andwetoldhimtojusttelluswhattodo.

Gentlemen,hesaid,listencarefully,andtrytounderstandwhatImabouttopropose.Illmake
thisshortandsweet.Iproposethateachofyoutellustwostoriestohelppassthetimeonthe
waytoCanterbury,andthentelltwomorestoriesabouttheoldendaysonthewayback.And
whicheveroneofyoutellsthemostinformativeorfunnystorywillgetafreedinnerpaidbythe
restofusrighthereinmyhotelwhenyouallgetback.And,tomakesureyouenjoythejourney,
Illpaymyownwaytogowithyouandbeyourguide.Illalsodecidewhotellsthebeststory.And
anyonewhoquestionsmyjudgmentcanpaytheentirecostofthetripforeveryone.Letmeknow
ifthissoundslikeagoodideatoyou,andIllgogetready.

Wealllovedtheideaandpromisedthatwedfollowtherulesofthebetandaskedhimtocome
withustoCanterburyandbethejudgeofthecontest.Weallorderedsomewineanddranka
toast,thenimmediatelywenttobed.


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