Revisjul Donfont9

July 1
"FREELY YE HAVE RECEIVED, FREELY GIVE."

Health Is for Everyone
"Beloved, I wish above all things that thou mayest prosper and be in health, even as thy soul
prospereth."
3 John 2.
A quiet winter wedding had brought the bride and the groom into their marriage partnership.
On July 1 they celebrated their love with a summer wedding reception. A lovely outdoor pavilion in
the country had been chosen to host their many guests. We had arrived while the preliminaries were
still underway. The sights of dozens of chickens and a pig roasting renewed my commitment to
vegetarian food, of which plenty was awaiting us. Live musicians provided music for lovers. Only the
wedding party was missing.
Then it happened. From the doors of the recreation vehicle ushered forth the members of the
bridal party dressed in high style black and white attire. With camera in hand and confusion in mind,
I watched for our niece, the bride, to appear, until the procession was over. Not one lady looked like
the natural country beauty I remembered. When I sought her out, I knew I had just been ushered into
a new generation of bridal innovations. Her white high-top hat over a glamorous hairdo that crowned
her beaded mini-gown outfit had made her totally unrecognizable to me. The long veil that graced
her short gown marked her as the bride, but somehow it could not veil the shock felt by the
conservative guests who had not yet become accustomed to the new style.
The toasts to the health of the wedded couple go with them, and a new lesson goes with me,
as we bid farewell to the stuffed bride and groom placed by the sign announcing Julie and Joe's
reception. The events of life do not always match our expectations, nor affirm our values, nor cater to
our comfort zones. Still happiness and health maintain their priorities in both young and old among
us. How can we relate to foster the emotional, spiritual, mental, and physical health of our
relationships in an age when much diversity exists and more freedom for self-expression threatens
our norms?
Having studied our need for wisdom, knowledge, understanding, and prosperity, we now
encounter health, the fifth essential for abundant living. The roles in which we must pursue health
take us beyond our little circles of safety and press us into places where the needy await our
neighborly offers to spend our prosperity in ministry to their defects and deficiencies that destroy
their sense of well-being. We know our danger well: we tend to gauge others' emotional, spiritual,
mental, and physical well-being by our views of what comprises well-being. We think they should
desire whatever it takes to make us comfortable. We struggle against giving people the freedom to
act contrary to the decisions we make for ourselves. We want to withdraw our support from the
needy who resist becoming carbon copies of us. Are we ready to promote true health for all?
Lord, how shall I help people to prosper and be in health? Amen.
How do today's concepts relate to you?
Have you had events or deeds confront you that go against the standards you hold for yourself?
Did these deeds tend to establish or threaten your sense of well-being?
In which area of well-being did you feel most threatened: emotional, spiritual, mental, or physical?
Do you recall how you responded?
Did you act to protect yourself from notice by conforming to the disturbing element?
Or did you correct the people who were acting contrary to your view?
Or did you adapt to their unsettling deeds without expressing your opposition to them?
Or did you weigh the risk of damages they could suffer and try to keep them from doing what could
hurt them?
Or did you only cushion them from having to suffer the consequences of their dangerous deeds?
What responses to your efforts did you get from them?
Did the actual degree of well-being improve for you or them or both you and them or neither?
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July 2
Love Shines Light on Needs
"And the second is like, namely this, Thou shalt love thy neighbor as thyself. There is none other
commandment greater than these." Mark 12:31.
July 2 was among the rare days that I spend with my son, Steven, who enjoys his summer
vacationing in Michigan. When I consider who puts color in my life, he always ranks high on the list.
No human being knows me better than he does. While we were raising him as a child, he was raising
me as a parent. We both learned much in the process. Since his childhood years we have shared a
love for the wit and the wealth of language, especially as our common familiarity with literature,
poetry, and music have enriched it for us. During his visits I focus on his needs and enjoy the short
time we have. I must confess that I couldn't care less about what the neighbors are or are not doing
then. If left to my selfish inclinations, I would miss the chance to enjoy the fun awaiting us in the
Neighbor-Needy partnerships he and I shall soon initiate.
So far we have studied the parent-child, teacher-student, lover-friend, and manager-employee
partnerships in God's family circle. The violet, indigo, blue, and green rainbow colors assigned to
these role partnerships have been all the dark colors of the rainbow. It is sobering to realize that
many people live their whole lives within these dark-colored partnerships: they are born into their
violet family, learn from indigo teachers what they must, run into blue romantic relationships, and
settle into green-producing occupations. They pour their prosperity and energy back into sustaining
those ties. In thus limiting their loving, they fail to discover the joyous adventure that resides in the
brightest yellow partnership between the Neighbor and the Needy.
Of all the promises Jesus has
given us, He follows His promise that "Thou shalt love thy neighbor as thyself" with these words:
"There is none other commandment greater than these." Mark 12:31. When we first wholly love God
so, by His grace, He can empower us with the faith, hope, and love we need to love our neighbors,
then He can give us great joy in causing us to truly love our neighbors.
Yellow sets our scene. Early yellow daffodils and forsythia have signaled some good-neighbor
deeds, but now the yellow summer sunshine casts its neighborly golden light over every area of life
and exposes to us the needs that surround us. We sit like a city on a hill to the needy. By our
prosperity we light their candles with yellow flames of burning hope. They come, hoping not to see
bushels of empty excuses used to turn down their signals for help. If we do deny the needy by using
our empty bushels to hide from the light of their needs, the pale yellow of cowardice that fears to lift a
hand to love a neighbor, will surely engulf us in sallow selfishness. In which yellow shall we bask:
sympathy's sunshine or self-centered cowardice?
Lord, You promised that I shall love my neighbor as myself. May the golden glow of Your love light the
way for me to do it. Amen.
Consider how much time you spend relating within the dark-colored partnership circles.
Do your relations with parents, children, teachers, students, lovers, friends, managers or fellow
employees use up most of your time?
Can people in those roles also be brought into Neighbor-Needy roles with you? All of them probably
have some need and/or some resources and skills for meeting needs.
How do you feel when you can volunteer to help someone who has no way to reward you?
Do you think that recognizing our "love your neighbor" responsibility will detract from the joy of loving
them or deepen its meaning for you?
What thoughts does the color yellow bring to your mind?
Have you noticed how transparent yellow light is?
What does "transparent", as it relates to neighborly deeds, suggest to you?
Have you ever had people light candles of desire in your mind?
Have they hid those candles from their view by covering them with bushels of empty excuses for not
following through with their bright ideas?
Do you do that?
July 3
How Large Is Your House?
"Neither do men light a candle, and put it under a bushel, but on a candlestick; and it giveth light
unto all that are in the house." Matthew 5:15.
We live in a white dome-shaped home designed by my husband, Lloyd, who works for a
structural steel company. Its construction is of structural steel and polyurethane foam. Some people
think it resembles an igloo and others, a space craft. It appears small from the outside, but its open
area and 16 foot ceiling give it a spacious inside atmosphere. Much of what we own is housed within
its walls. Houses create the boundaries that shelter what we own and the people who benefit from it.
Some of our possessions cannot be confined by four walls, or in our case, by round
hemispheric walls. The light of love that God sets aglow within us is one of them. His lovelight is
given for our use in loving our neighbors as ourselves, people usually supposed to be outside of our
house. God-given love gives light to all that are in the house, and all who need it belong in the house.
In the noblest sense our house takes in all who need to be touched by God's loving influence as it
operates in us and through us. We cannot dismiss our responsibility to them by pushing them beyond
the boundaries of our love. We cannot say that because we do not love them, they do not qualify as
our neighbors.
In the general sense we cannot choose our neighbors. They may be people who are
prosperous and well-equipped to meet our needs. They may have a wealth of things for which we
have no use. They may be struggling with burdens of debt, some of which may be owed to us. They
may simply be nice guys who are ever ready to grant a favor. They may be hard to get to know or
hard to love. Or they may even be rude, annoying violators of our privacy, disturbers of our peace,
and destroyers of our property. Neighbors may include members of any of our role partnerships
(parents, teachers, lovers, managers, etc.) that we have studied thus far. Anyone we know may
qualify for Neighbor-Needy roles, as we shall define them.
From an endless variety we can choose with whom we will join in covenant Neighbor-Needy
partnerships. Prospects for such partnerships are limitless, as is the joy to be gleaned from them. In
this partnership context the leader is the Neighbor who is any person who has prospered in some way
and has something to give. The Needy is the partner who has some emotional, spiritual, mental, or
physical need, debt, or defect. The Needy's role is to receive whatever the Neighbor can give to meet
his need. As the Neighbor loves his partner by giving, the Needy loves his leader by receiving in a
manner that meets his need. True giving is giving what is truly needed. True receiving involves using
the needed gift to meet the given need. As they give and receive, the Neighbor gains joy, and the
Needy gains health. Genuine giving and receiving, good reasons for relating to one another, are
difficult skills to perfect. But the needy world waits for us to learn them.
Lord, teach me to give and receive in harmony with Your will. Amen.
What is your house keeping inside its walls that should be shared or discarded?
What are you shutting outside that could be beneficial to your family?
What possessions do you have, such as love and influence, that extend beyond your four walls?
Who might be hoping to benefit from having those possessions applied to their needy lives?
Does the sight of others' deficiencies motivate you to aid them or to alienate them?
Are your children learning to scorn the needy as inferior to them or to develop their response ability
to help them?
Which is easier for you: giving or receiving?
What do you have to give? Who needs it?
What do you need to receive? Who has it?
How can you build covenant partnerships with others that will solve these needs?
July 4
Against Your Neighbor?
"Thou shalt not bear false witness against thy neighbor." Exodus 20:16.
July 4, 1776, is Independence Day in the United States. On this day champions of freedom
gave birth to our nation. No longer would free people planted on this soil passively witness injustice
forced upon them by a distant monarchy. American patriots fiercely resisted our distant neighbor's
attempts to force its will upon us. Victory crowned their valiant efforts. God moved His hand in our
behalf then so that men could be free of oppression and free to love one another as their Spirit-guided
consciences directed. He has given His word that we shall not have to live falsely among our
neighbors if we keep His command promise IX in our mind and heart.
Today few of us have to fight for the privilege of loving our neighbors. Ample opportunities to
do so surround us. They test how well we bear witness to others that God can and does empower us
to love one another. While we would like to suppose that we do love our neighbors as we love
ourselves, we bemoan the fact that we have little time to do either. The dilemma is real. Our time is
consumed by catering to others' demands in the hope that they will supply our needs for love. We
find little time to show our God-given love to the needy by seeing and meeting their needs.
We hope they won't notice our neglect while we busy ourselves at seeking the good will of the
wealthy whom we've chosen to love us. If they do notice, we hope they'll not feel slighted, as we
pursue our more important goals. We detest the notion that the needy have any business judging our
witness as true or false, as long as we are not interfering with their business. Never mind that we've
been commanded to "Love your neighbor AS yourself [is loved]." We'll get to dealing with our duty to
love them in our own time, if they don't pester us too much in the meantime. We figure that as long
as we don't work against our neighbors' well-being, we cannot possibly bear a false witness against
them.
"You shall not bear false witness..." is commonly viewed as a God-given order to tell the truth
in any testimony given about a neighbor. But bearing a witness of what it means to be Christian goes
beyond stating the facts we gather about our neighbors. I may say, "My elderly neighbor cannot go to
her mailbox, but she can barely see to read anyway." Have I stated the facts? Yes. She's unable to
walk outside or to see to read. But truth goes beyond the facts. Truth puts facts we observe into a
need-meeting context, and looks for ways to bear true witness of Jesus love for the needy by
ministering to them. Jesus never shies away from peoples need for His love. The facts render
none "hopeless" nor helpless in His eyes: He is their Hope and their Help in time of need. How shall I
bear a true witness of Jesus that will bring hope and help to my neighbor? How can I work for, not
against, my neighbor's well-being? Could she and I try to agree on a plan for me to get her mail and
read it to her? Could we then ask God to empower us to fulfill that plan in her our behalf? What
would Jesus do?
Lord, can any witness be more false than is our relating as though You don't exist? Amen.
As you weigh your apparent overload of personal commitments against the list of neglected needy
awaiting your attention, which people top your list?
Have you thought of discussing their dilemma with them to see how you might be able to help them
within the time frame you have available?
Could it be that you are avoiding doing something for them because you fear they're expecting you
to do everything for them?
Do any of them not dare to ask you for help because they fear to be seen as imposing the least bit
upon your "important" agenda?
Would any of your personal friends or family members benefit by uniting with you in unselfish
ministry to them?
What message do you want to give each party about who Jesus is and who Christians are?
What message are you actually giving now? Since Jesus is the Truth, the way we relate to truth bears
a witness of Jesus that either draws our neighbors to Him or drives them away.
July 5
TEACH the "Boxed-in" Needy
"All scripture is inspired by God and profitable for teaching..." 2 Timothy 3:16 NASB.
"And ye shall know the truth.." John 8:32.
For several months several teen-aged youth had been seeking to know the truth about one
another by communicating online among themselves. As the months passed, one truth had passed
all others in its intriguing significance to them. Who are the people behind the messages that are
conveying such friendliness to them? How do the faces belonging to the typing fingers look? What
kind of characters hide behind the computer screens that delight them? How will the recipients of
their fondness respond to them directly?
To explore this truth they had engaged our son Steven to direct the first ever Teen Computer
Camp at Andrews University for them. In his search for volunteers to help with the project, he
included me. On July 5, 1995, he and I arrived at Andrews to prepare for the arrival of the teen
campers. It was clear that I'd be running the kitchen and supervising the teens in their attempts to
assist with the meals.
We'll return to that pioneer adventure after we examine the boxed-in state of this chapter's
Neighbor-Needy relationships. Within this box the needy of our world try to ascertain the purpose of
the people who knock at the IN FRONT door they have locked against threatening intrusions into their
space. The curious, the critical, the condemning, the con artists, and the debt-collectors have helped
to create the caution that keeps their door closed even to casual observers. Their instincts for pridepreservation are stronger than their desires to admit and announce their emotional, spiritual, mental,
and physical health-related deficiencies.
Our challenge to lead the neighborly charge to address their true needs calls for a measure of
sympathy that we do not have. Sympathy adds spice to life by prompting helpful deeds to match the
hurting needs of others. Although ours is sparsely sifted like spice into our selfish agendas, we
cannot wholly ignore our need to teach and to live God's will for our role. As we stand (around) at the
IN FRONT door awaiting our turn to knock, we hope that our small sprinkling of sympathy will satisfy
their big need for it. (But we're not yet convinced that sympathetic deeds can add as much spice to
life as our own ideas for selfish entertainment do.)
Printed under the TEACH sign on the door, commandment IX says, "Thou shalt not bear false
witness against thy neighbour." Below this God-given promise we read our Goal in teaching it: Value
God's Truth. We can plainly see it, but the Needy in the box won't see it until we demonstrate it. If we
value learning the truth about them, we're not likely to witness falsely against them. Instead we will
truly treat them as we would want Jesus to treat us in similar circumstances.
Lord, how can I show the countless needy that they count with You? Amen.
In our efforts to escape meeting the demands of others, we are tempted to stand as a witness to what
they're doing wrong and use it to justify our neglect of their needs.
As you scan the cases of the needy in your world, do you see yourself building cases against people
to avoid relating to them?
Can you distinguish between their needs and their demands?
Does your list of needy persons include people of all ages?
Do you tend to assume that young, talented, wealthy, or beautiful people have no needs that you can
meet?
Do you fear that meeting the needs of the impoverished and the ugly will make you impoverished and
ugly?
Do you feel guilty about meeting only one need for someone who has many needs to be met, as
though you, not God, were responsible to run that person's whole life?
Are you willing to value God's truth more than man's demands in regard to our duty to the needy?
How does God's truth about their need jive or clash with our desires to get love from the needy?
July 6
Teens Are Needy
"And ye shall know the truth, and the truth shall make you free." John 8:32. [to love]
On July 6, 1995, the teens converged on Andrews University from almost every direction of
the United States and from Canada to turn their electronic facts and fantasies into fleshed-out
realities. Shocks rippled through the group as their new facts exploded their fond fantasies. The
witty boys who had enjoyed electronic popularity in the club were discovered to be lacking in the
physical traits that captivate teen-aged girls. The girls who had seemed so sweet, friendly, and
organized were found to be sullen, partial, and ill-prepared, as they struggled to unite fantasy and
reality. Some of the disappointed even regretted having paid the price to come.
Dynamics that
were needless while relating online, now flew into action to build status and establish a social pecking
order. Teen status rests heavily upon the ability to gain a sweetheart. Just to enter the playing field of
this pursuit, each must pass the approval test of those who have the power to label others as
unworthy. So they mark the standard-setters, usually the pretty and the powerful, and defer to their
opinions, hoping to appear worthy of their favor. These models decide which activities and people will
gain their seal of approval. After that only the bravest dare participate freely in befriending
unapproved people or supporting their ideas and actions. As teens observe their models, they lessen
their own enthusiasm and behavior to match theirs.
By their teen years youth are painfully aware of the cost of violating the boundaries of those
who rule. They dare not surpass the rulers for fear they will be rejected rather than loved by them.
Those who wanted to win their teen models' approval were now faced with having to copy their aloof
attitudes toward the activities of the opening sessions. Sensing the climate, few youth felt free to
lead in front of the group and thereby risk the scorn, or be cast with the outcasts. Most were "boxedin" as needy.
None of the teens were equal to the task of valuing God's truth and ministering to the needy.
Opportunities to meet needs passed by ignored, as they sorted their frustrations and sought to
recover their losses. Only one romantic couple immediately set about to build their own cozy world
and test the outer boundaries of our guidelines for "loving" one another.
One thing is clear:
Teens are not easily turned from their romantic pursuits and
disappointments to uniting wholeheartedly in an unselfish agenda of integrated group activities
geared to loving one another. Another thing is equally clear: As adults we have generally failed to
teach the skills they need to perceive their problem, let alone provide a solution. We face a
challenge!
Lord, how do I treat the people You want me to love? Amen.
In your social sphere have you found that status rests heavily upon gaining or having a sweetheart?
Why?
Does being linked with another say were lovable and need not be rejected by others as unworthy of
their love?
Do you want your relationships to do more than merely protect against being targeted by outsiders as
unlovable?
Wouldn't you prefer relating in ways that remove the rejection occurring within relationships?
Are the assumptions of "I'm right. You're wrong." more difficult to handle with your partners than
with strangers?
Are you trying to truly love the people that should be loving you?
Do you dare to join in good activities that are frowned upon by the people with social status in your
group?
If each ignored people's attempts to control others by disapproval, would the controlling people have
any power
Since their power resides in our responses to them, do we not give them the power they have by our
cowardice?
July 7
Straightening the Front Line
"My heart goes out to the commanders of Israel, The volunteers among the people; Bless the Lord!"
Judges 5:9 NASB.
Just as the Lord had chosen commanders to work in the days of Judges 21:25 when "every
man did that which was right in his own eyes", the Lord had commanders chosen for pioneering the
way to success for this first ever Teen Computer Camp. My son, Steven, directed our group of adult
volunteers in planning our strategies to create an environment in which our teens could be loved as
they learned to bond into a working team.
I would like to say that all his volunteers banded together with a single purpose and corralled
the campers into cheerfully participating in pioneering an ideal model for all future computer camps
to follow. But this lesson is about truth, not tall tales. There was no contest about who would stand IN
FRONT of the boxed-in teens to face their frowns and risk their scorn. All agreed to let Steve fulfill that
role. He would lead the meetings, clarify the rules, and set the tone for the campers. He would work
the front lines in this battle to overcome their negative attitudes and define the camp agenda, which
had been agreed upon in their online meetings.
The challenges came with the criticisms regarding how he could best reach the goals we had.
Each volunteer came with an area of expertise and an aura of authority--at a safe distance from the
front lines, that is. We had a whole spectrum of differing views ranging from strict and strictly
conservative to lenient and unconditionally indulgent. Of course, the whole idea of a staff of
volunteers tampering with previously agreed-upon policies, such as bedtime, that the online teens
had bargained into place with Steve was unacceptable to the youth.
Fortunately, this was not Steve's first time at bat with youth or with adults. He took the job
kindly, but not blindly. He was the youngest of his staff, the closest to the years of knowing what it's
like and how it feels to be so needy and so unable to admit it. He had room in his heart for them just
as they were. He sat where they sat, he stood where they had promised to stand while they lacked
the courage to do so. He asked nothing of them that he knew they could not do, even though they
had promised. Yet he took no revenge: he robbed them of nothing he had promised them. In fact, he
held firmly against some staff opposition to his commitments with the youth. He would neither
violate their trust nor crush their hopes. He would simply love them according to their needs. He had
a heaven-sent university musician who stood with him and together they began to love the students
into a united group. As these men joined their guitar and keyboard and singing, we knew that the
Holy Spirit would not leave the youth comfortless. And the adults? We had the wisdom and the
authority to cooperate.
Lord, when we feel so smart, show us our ignorance. Amen.
Recall when you have volunteered to help a group.

Was your role to lead or to support the leader?
Did you differ with others in your views of how to do it?
Did you discover that cooperation can work wonders?
Were you dealing with youth?
Did their behavior arouse any uncertainty about your own ability to deal with them?
Did you resist seeing their needs as your inadequacies, and then stay on the front lines to meet their
needs?
Or did you withdraw to avoid rejection and criticize the others who kept trying?
Recall some who have volunteered in your behalf. All leader roles are, in a sense, voluntary: parents,
teachers, lovers,
bosses, whether paid or not, must be willing to perform in their chosen roles. All of them can benefit
from our thanks for their services and our forgiveness of their mistakes.
How did they help or harm you?
Have you thanked them or forgiven them yet? Can you?
July 8
Common Ground
"All Scripture is inspired by God and profitable for teaching, for reproof..." 2 Timothy 3:16 NASB.
We shall leave the Teen Computer Camp in good hands for awhile, as we pursue our lesson
sequence. We have seen how hard it is to value the truth about the needy. We have felt our
reluctance to force ourselves upon those who are boxed in by their lack of emotional, spiritual,
mental, or physical health. The same pride and fear of rejection that keep us from asking others to
meet our needs, blocks us from daring to volunteer to meet theirs. Still the yellow of the Golden Rule
moves us to press on their door to reprove, rather than lean on our cowardice and retreat.
We step up to the welcome mat, as though it were a home plate, and prepare to swing into
action. We strike the door and get no answer. We turn the knob and pull without results. Then
shame sweeps over us, as we notice that the lock does not require an insider to act. The lever on the
lock is on the outside. The insiders are locked in, and it is we who ARE the key to setting them free. A
mass of old prejudices tumble into disorder, as we see old notions collide with the facts. How could
we have been neighbors to these needy so long without having discovered that? All this time we've
been locked away from them by our own choice.
The scene changes, as our concept of the Neighbor role does. Knowing now that the door will
open at our bidding and that we will be guests in this needy person's world, we prepare to enter: we
straighten our clothes, plant a pleasant look, and gently open the door. After all the rumors we've
heard and helped on their way, we do not expect what we see. Except for the details that differ, this
very lived-in box looks nearly identical to our own lives. We see that they are no more or no less
needy than we. As it is with us, the only things of value that they have are what God in His mercy has
given them. The rest of the clutter is merely waiting for them to find ways to rid themselves of it.
Standing on this common ground, we quickly lose sight of our "we and they" mind-set. We
find as many questions tumbling from our puzzled minds as answers. We can barely resist pouring
out news of our needs to those whom weve come to aid. We had not recognized our own illnesses
until we stood viewing them in others.
"What do you need?" I ask, regaining my composure. "From the wealth that God has given
me, I O U in the areas and to the degree that I'm given more than you. Shall we let God reprove us,
so He can keep His promise that we'll not bear false witness against each other? We can benefit from
the trust truth will furnish us, as we examine obstacles that keep us from valuing God's truth more.
Are we ready to have God reprove and remove what keeps us from loving?"
Lord, I O U sounds so easy, as You say Your yoke is. Amen.
As you recall people who have various needs, to what do you attribute the cause of their needs?
What abilities do you have to respond (response abilities) to their needs?
Would they let you open the door to helping them if they knew they could trust you to help them
without betraying them?
Have you ever prayed for the right person to come to your aid and had God send you a good
neighbor?
Have you ever confided your needs to others and had them use your words against you or lie about
you?
Did you wish you had been silent?
How can people who don't value the truth of another's needs truly be helpful?
How does the tendency to consider ourselves better than others affect our efforts to help them?
Would people want to remove others' ills if they were using those ills as a measuring stick to prove
their own superior worth?
July 9
REPROVE GRIEF
"Surely He hath borne our griefs, and carried our sorrows: ...He was wounded for our
transgressions.."
Isaiah 53:4, 5.
The Needy, whose needs have been kept within the darkness of their boxed-in state, now
decide to expose their issues by flinging open the OUT FRONT inner side of the front door to the light.
Under the REPROVE label on it the word GRIEF names the negative mental attitude that keeps the
needy from valuing God's truth. We hardly need the sign as we listen to the woes over the losses that
form the shape of the grief inundating us.
We step back a little at seeing GRIEF listed as a negative mental attitude. We have supposed
that grief is a natural emotion of human beings, not item 5 in the list of seven attitudes that invite
death. We've already seen how distrust, depression, guilt, and anxiety wreck our relationships. But it
seems that grief usually waits until someone or something has already caused us loss or wrecked a
relationship we prize before it manifests itself.
When we have indulged it, we have not supposed anything was out of order in our lives, nor
did we feel we were being OUT FRONT in revealing any sin problem by exposing grief. In fact, our chief
lament is often about how we did not deserve the loss we suffered. And our first question asks why
bad things happen to good people. But on second thought, grief is very much about what is out of
order. We never invite grief into our minds when all is well.
Does God blame us for feeling pain over losses He allows us to suffer? No, of course not.
He feels the pain of each true loss more keenly even than we can feel it, but pain and the GRIEF we
experience differ. Grief is not the direct result of the loss. GRIEF is the result of a series of responses
we make to the actual loss. Our responses can lessen or deepen grief. To understand God's will in
dealing with losses, let us consider some facts.
A loss is the act of unintentionally parting with
something of value, the absence of which leads to harmful loss rather than healthful gain. Whether
we view partings as causing harm or gain relates directly to what we value. We may not notice what
values we place on things or on people until some event removes them from us. Our reactions to
losses reveal what we value, why, and how wise we are in valuing them. Reactions raise questions:
Do our heart's values jive with what our minds call truth? Do truths we value jive with the revelations
of truth God gives us? Do we truly value God's truth, as we suppose, or do we actually value what
furthers our selfish purposes for reaching our own goals? Does God label losses as we do?
Lord, may I not label as losses the "partings" You allow to bring healthful gain and teach me to value
God's truth. Amen.
Recall a valued item in your house that a child broke.

How did the actual value of it differ from the value you gave it because of its connection to a beloved
person? Did your response to the breakage demonstrate that your child is of greater value than an
object that reflected a happy memory?
Did it smack of revenge for the broken object or savor of love that works to teach the child and
restore his sense of well-being despite the broken object?
Does being guilty of breaking an object differ from being accused of evil motives for doing so?
Did you weight the incident with accusations of the child's intent to hurt you by breaking something
you value to make sure he paid for his mistake with the cents of guilt and shame?
Did you focus on self-pity then or on the child's need to know that your love for him was bigger than
his mistake? Do we protect things best by modeling retaliation or gentle, corrective behavior toward
the erring?
Can you justify letting your grief press a false witness of guilty against a child even though you love
him?
July 10
Running to Mischief?
"Six things doth the Lord hate: yea, seven are an abomination unto Him:....
[5] feet that be swift in running to mischief.." Proverbs 6:16-18.
Still in a quandary about how grief could ever relate to sin, we read again the REPROVE with
Reason sign on the OUT FRONT door of the Needy's box. We are to REPROVE grief by revealing the
Reason for its affliction. It is caused by the fifth sin God hates: "feet that be swift in running to
mischief." Knowing how painful grief is, it's no wonder that God hates its cause.
Feet set the pace and the direction the person will travel to deal with his losses in life. The
direction that leads to GRIEF is mischief. Mischief is the behavior of choice when people suffer losses
that lessen the amount of love they can expect. When they lose their first place of importance in the
eyes of their essential friends, they "miss-being-chief" and swiftly run to mischief. A course of
mischief only guarantees more losses and much grief.
Let us revisit boxed-in Les and Lena from June 9 to track this misbehavior at work at wrecking
their marriage. Les and Lena had entered into a 50 - 50 partnership empowered by the force of the
favor. The strings attached to their favors had united them in a 2-D Guilt Cycle. See May 17. He
favored her with flattery and she did all the favors he demanded of her, fearing his disapproval yet
expecting his love. As time wore on, both devalued the favors they were getting as being worth less
than the favors they were giving. Their dissatisfaction with the voluntary responses of each other had
led them to putting prices on their services and demanding just
payment for them. Even so, favor by favor the debts they placed against each other mounted. At last
Lena, weary of trying to earn his approval and win his love, confronts Les: "I'm not satisfied with the
amount of love I'm getting for all my hard work. It seems that I cannot win your approval, let alone
your love, no matter how hard or how well I work. Will you love me or won't you?"
Confronted with two options, Les reviews his position. He had promised he'd love her in order
to get her to love him. In order to even dare to court her love, he had had to believe that if he could
get her to love him, he could love her in return. But now he was caught in a reality that he could not
even admit to himself: he didn't know how to love, nor did he have any love to give; the guilt cycle he
operated was about getting love, not giving it. He refused to admit that he had no love. If he did, she
would stop meeting his demands to win his love. And he would lose his lover, who was defined as
such as long as she met his demands. Trapped and unable to love her, he chooses the option she
fears: He will blame his failure on her by disapproving of her efforts to please him. He knows she
was conditioned in childhood to earn approval before expecting to be loved. He can avoid exposing
his own lack by withholding his approval of her.
Lord, do I hide my lack of love by blaming others for not deserving it? Amen.
Have you had to switch your priorities away from a chief person who misunderstood the necessity of
your action? Did that person include mischief in his/her reaction to your decision?
Have you ever lost your status as the chief friend of a person upon whom you depended for love?
Did you feel hurt by that person's move away from you toward another?
Did you feel that you were being blamed for it?
Were you to blame or had that person failed to keep a promise?
Did your response involve some type of mischief?
Was the grief you felt related in part to the mischief you practiced?
In what type of role partnership did it occur--parent-child, lover-friend, manager--employee, neighbor-needy, or other?
How did the degree of hurt you felt relate to the level of expectation you had?
July 11
Path to GRIEF
"For my life is spent with grief..." Psalm 31:10.
Lena's pressure for an answer to "Will you love me or won't you?" moves both Les and Lena to
the next stage "A" of the Guilt Cycle. Flattery and Fear lose their prominence. Les begins to act out
his resolve to blame Lena for the lack of love she perceives in their marriage. After all, he's been
nothing but nice to her: he has flattered her all the while he's favored her with demands to do favors
for him. It's not his fault she lacks love. She should know if she'd do more loving, she'd get more
loving.
Lena hears no answer, but she detects a change in him. He has withdrawn his flattery, which
was all she knew of his love for her. Removed from his pedestal of praise, she misses being chief in
his eyes. She watches Les sink into depression. Just as a deflated balloon finds escape from
likelihood of being punctured, Les leans on depression to create a protective zone from which he can
convey his disapproval of her efforts to love him. His depression silently states that he is right: if she
were doing her job of making him happy, he'd BE happy, not depressed. Right?
Lena hears his silent A-accusation of guilt loud and clear. The guilt he projects at her presses
heavily upon her. But his accounting of her loving deeds does not agree with hers. She has loved
much and gained little. She ceases feeling sad for him and examines her own plight. A wide gap
exists between what she has earned and what he has paid; that gap determines the size of the Great
Rift that will develop between them. She'll use that gap to justify executing her four-step plan (W-E-PT) to make him pay his debt. But her plan will only produce the GRIEF she will suffer, and firmly
establish their Great Rift In Essential Friendship (GRIEF). Note her plan:
W-Weigh the loss. She Weighs her loss and converts it into a debt against Les.. But he denies
owing the debt. After all, he has spent as much time with her as she has spent with him. The claims
that loom so large to her appear insignificant to him.
E-Escalate the debt. The 5 units of love he owed to her become 50, and the 50 become 500. The
interest on the debt rises as her interest in getting his payments mounts. He objects and disputes
the size of the debt by refusing to agree that he's wrong and by not paying it.
P-Prove shes correct. Since she must be "right" before she can expect him to meet her demands,
she sets out to Prove shes correct. To do so she invents mischief to annoy him. And that does it! He
moves from his covert anger (depression) to overt angry accusations against her. "Aha!" she says,
"see how you treat me? Your anger proves that I'm right: you DON'T love me!"
T-Try to collect. She Tries to collect the love debts. By her mischief of teasing, tirades, tantrums,
taunts, tears, threats she tries to recoup her loss. Can her attacks force from him love that he does
not have and cannot give?
Lord, Your love flows freely to all from Calvary. Why do I ruin lives trying to get love from loveless
people who are dying to have someone love them? Amen.
Recall a time when you've felt under-loved for all your effort.
Match your behaviors that followed with these steps to examine how you
1) weighed your loss,
2) escalated the debt,
3) proved you were correct, and
4) tried to collect.
Is anyone you know currently running this plan against you?
Do you know the reason why?
Are you expected to pay a debt that is impossible for you to pay?
Does the W-E-P-T process fix the problem or firmly fix the GRIEF between you and your friend?
If people are expecting you to sustain their inner sense of well-being, you face impossible
expectations. None can do that for another. God alone can provide us with life-sustaining love.
July 12
Accepting Guilt from Accusers
"I am weary of my crying:...then I restored that which I took not away." Psalm 69:3-4. [I apologized
for what I didn't do.]
Lena's plan fixed nothing. It only fixed the grief caused by her "feet that be swift in running to
mischief" firmly in place in her marriage. She had triggered the need for Les to launch the A stage of
the guilt cycle. His Accusations, dressed in depression, had moved her to resist them in ways that
fulfilled his charges which at first were false. Thus, her reactionary misbehavior gave him the
reasons he needed to "justify" not only his lack of love for her but also his charge of blame laid upon
her.
Now as Les angrily verbalizes his charges, she knows her plan has failed. She has given him
ample examples of her mischief. In doing so she has wrecked her chance to be "right" about
demanding his love. But she has WEPT long enough, and can weep no more. She moves from
grieving his lack of love to marketing hers. She wipes her tears with a new resolve: if she cannot win
his love by being right, she will win it by being wrong. Discarding all further attempts to win
approval, she uses his labels of her deficiencies and the mischief he has driven her to commit, to
prove to him her helplessness and to establish his responsibility to love her. She A-Accepts the guilt
he projected upon her and claims to be a victim of his abuse. He blames her for his refusal to love
her; thus he gives responsibility for his lack to one who can't fix it.
Sad to say, accepting guilt does not remove grief. In fact, grief intensifies when issues of guilt
are left unresolved. Such guilt sears "WRONG" in the mind that mistakenly surrenders control of its
conscience and will to its Accuser. Guilt destroys our belief that anyone could love us and bars our
escape from the cellar of grief.
Lena cannot live with the guilt between her and Les. Though she fueled his reasons for anger,
she cannot stand to have him be overtly angry at her. Her DOING must link with his BEING (right) in
order for her to be at peace. By accepting the guilt he claims she has, she enables him to be right
once again. Then when she does what he says, she too can be right. If only she can convince him to
say that it's all right for her to be wrong, she'll be fine. Taking a chance, Lena says, "Les, I Apologize
for not doing what I should to love you. I'm sorry for the way I acted, but I can't change that. Will you
just love me for who I am, not for what I do or don't do? I'm tired of trying to earn approval to win
love." She hopes he'll lovingly forgive her mischief and say she's "all right" no matter what she does
or does not do, but she listens in vain.
Les prizes her apology for deeds she did not do; it provides the proof he needs to justify his
failure to love her. "Since you apologize, you must know you're wrong. I can't even respect you, let
alone love you, when you do wrong and refuse to change. How can you escape BEING guilty when
you are DOING what proves guilt?"
Lord, I need to stop seeking acceptance of my supposed wrongdoing from those who project guilt at
me, and instead look to You for forgiveness for my real sins. Amen.
Recall a time when an essential friend became depressed.

Did you know why?
Did you wonder if you were being blamed as the cause for the depression?
If you concluded that you were, did it bother you to be blamed for something you did not do?
How did you react?
Did you ignore it or react to the silent accusation?
Did your response bring cheer or anger to your friend?
If anger, did you try to apologize to restore harmony between you?
Was your apology accepted or was it used against you to fix the blame firmly upon you?
Did you resolve the discord? How?
Must you pretend or assume that you are wrong to get along all right with that friend?
Does it work for you?
July 13
Gratitude Lessens Grief
"The Lord thy God in the midst of thee is mighty; He will save, He will rejoice over thee with joy; He
will rest in His love, He will joy over thee with singing." Zephaniah 3:17.
The Teen Computer Camp that we left to the care of Steven and his volunteers while we
explored the reason behind the grief reproof, lasted about a week. As my satisfied mind fit the
remaining scenes into the big picture of this camp, I saw how the Lord was in the midst of this
adventure in mighty ways. Having completed a variety of activities with good results and without
serious injuries, we were thankful that the Lord showed His loving muscle in our behalf. Gratitude
sang its grand finale.
What happened? Their play activity, which included traveling to top recreation spots, gave
them ample chances to discard their initial disappointments and build new rapport with one another.
Their work activities centered on a community work project that involved fixing up a house for
occupancy. The worship activities drew forth their increasing participation, as they came to feel safe
in the group. They especially enjoyed relating with a popular singing group that Steve had invited to
perform and to stay after awhile to personally visit with them. Each day brought new chances to
worship, work, play, relate, and learn to love one another.
Did they cease being teens and miraculously respond perfectly to every adult effort to enrich
their lives? No. They continued to need the leaders to set the pace and hold the boundaries. But
they demonstrated in miniature how a world can come together to learn to listen for needs and unite
to do something toward meeting them and making this earth a better place for God's diverse family.
The last day was a mixed blessing. It climaxed the great week of growing they had done
during their days together. While glad for the past week, many were sad the camp was ending.
Sadness deepened as parents arrived, and they had to tear themselves away from their friends.
They wanted to keep the comfort of their quickly formed friendships and deny that there is "a time to
embrace and a time to refrain from embracing." Ecclesiastes 3:5.
What better way can God teach us to set our affections on things above than to show us the
need for friendships to be built so that they can indeed become eternal? How shall we view life's
unexpected or unwanted partings with people we value? Shall we write "harmful loss" or "beneficial
gain" over the days and years that God has given us to befriend and love them, as they and we have
shared the road? Shall we wait until too late to worship, work, play, and love, then run swiftly to the
mischief that leads to GRIEF, or shall we daily pave the way to forever in Christ with gratitude to God
for His tastes of heaven and His songs of hope?
Lord, when I face sad partings, may gratitude for benefits You gave keep me from running to mischief
that ends in grief. Amen.
Although youth seem to be in a hurry, they sip life slowly.

Consider how long it takes them to learn to value the lessons from a chapter of friendship that is
completed.
How about you?
Do you write "beneficial gain" over the time spent in building friendships even after an unexpected or
unwanted parting has interrupted them?
Are partings more likely to be temporary when loving gratitude guides our responses to the partner
than when
mischief does?
Do you have a case in point that illustrates either response?
Which response represents best the love you shared with your friend before the parting?
Are you daily building forever-bonds of covenant friendship with people you love?
July 14
But He Promised...
"Oh, that men would praise the Lord for His goodness, and for His wonderful works to the children of
men!"
Psalm 107:8, again in 15, 21, and 31.
A view of life's down side is best seen from life's up side. We must learn to position ourselves
where we can grasp the needy with one hand and God's promises to meet their need with the other.
Having promoted the need to relate to apparent losses in positive ways, rather than with mischief, I
now face the obvious question: In what positive way may we avoid mischief and lessen grief?"
Any superiority vanishes, as I remember that without Jesus I can do nothing. So alike we are
as Neighbor and as Needy, I worry that I shall be mistaken as the needy one of the two of us. But the
surrounding darkness of this needy boxed-in world lessens my chances that I'll even be seen within
this territory. I'm ashamed that it matters to me! What kind of true witness would worry about not
wanting to be seen with the needy people? And knowing myself, how could I honestly call being
viewed as a needy person a mistake?
False pretense aside and Philippians 4:19 in one hand, we join hands and follow the light
beaming through the open front door until we find ourselves facing the cross outlined on the OUT BACK
inner side of the back door. I start to feel comfortable in the OUT BACK privacy of this needy person's
world, as I anticipate the perfect answer that Jesus will give us. With confidence I recite my promise
to my needy friend: "My God, I repeat MY God, shall supply all your need according to His riches in
Christ Jesus." "Now," I say, "we'll soon see the riches He has for you in Jesus."
As we turn our mind's eye to the cross to envision Jesus, who at our last visits had solved His
mother's and John's need to love one another, our expectations from Him are high. I beam as I hear
Him repeat my recent words, "My God, My God..." But something's wrong! The tone is anguish. The
words are not to us. Suddenly the script has changed. The benefits and the blessings that had been
pouring forgiveness for the executioners, paradise for the criminal, security for Mary, and guidance
for John have stopped. Stopped at our very point of need. The words sting their way into my security:
"My God, My God, why hast Thou forsaken Me?" Mark 15:34
I can't believe this! I can't believe that this God who has promised to supply our needs via
riches in Jesus is now forsaking His very own Son, His very Truth, the only hope we had. Angry and
embarrassed that I raised the needy's hope for nothing, I fear my "true witness" reputation is ruined if
God won't keep His promise I advertised. If only I had minded my own business and let the needy
alone, my "true witness" reputation would not be tainted by my glibly-quoted Philippians promise. Is
this tragic forsaking of Jesus part of God's wonderful works? My eyes shut.
Lord, why do I cling to self-pity in view of Calvary? Amen.
Think of a time you were trying to help needy people.

Were you apprehensive about being mistaken as one of them, rather than one working for them?
Were you uncomfortable about the risk of having your good reputation damaged?
Can you see how our pride inhibits us from being of greater help to the needy?
Are there any needy people among the highly respected in our society?
What keeps us from relating to their needs?
Since it would not be a pride problem, might it be the fear of being rejected by them?
Since rejection leaves people feeling "not good enough", does fear of having our pride injured hinder
us in helping them also?
Have you ever lifted a person's expectations for something that didn't occur and been embarrassed
about what that person would think of you? Did you feel like you needed to make excuses for why
God did not prevent a tragedy or provide certain expected prosperity?
Did you feel like apologizing for God when He didn't do what you said He'd do?
Have you ever felt like God has forsaken you?
Was it when you knew you sinned or when you felt you hadn't done anything to deserve it?
July 15
Carry Sin; Feel Forsaken
"My God, My God, why hast Thou forsaken Me?" Mark 15:34.
With my eyes shut against the vision of Calvary, I can only hear the crowd railing on Him. I
begin to identify their noise as cruel jeers: "Save thyself, and come down from the cross.... He saved
others; himself he cannot save. Let Christ... descend now from the cross, that we may see and
believe." Mark 15:29-32.
Unable to hear its horror any longer, I pull the hand of my needy friend and start to leave. But
he is caught up in the scene, and refuses to follow me. Struck by the marvel of Jesus' response, my
friend speaks his awe: "Nails or no, He could come down, but He stays as God's sacrifice for our sins
to atone for the guilt we incur and project and accept among us, that we may be free of it."
"Let's go," I urge. "He dies in vain. He said His Father has forsaken Him. If God has given up
on Him, He has given up on us."
"No," he says, "you are missing the meaning. Jesus' words are proof that He took our sins
upon Him. Just as acid has properties that eat holes in cloth, the property of sin is to make any who
bear it feel that God has forsaken him. That's what was happening as Jesus cried, "My God, My God,
why hast Thou forsaken Me?" His was the cry of my breaking heart multiplied in intensity by all the
world's sin-damaged hearts. How often I have felt forsaken by God, as my sin has overwhelmed my
life and crushed my hope for His love. But unlike Him, I have resisted attacks and tried to prove I'm
right despite accusations of "WRONG" that Satan and his followers have pressed upon me. In
resisting I only invented more mischief and sin of my own. I've even apologized and begged to be
accepted and allowed to stay just as I am, preferring to live and die with my familiar faults rather than
to struggle to escape them. I need Jesus."
"Just look at Him!" he marvels. "He takes the blame for all the sin ever done, He feels the
sense of separation from His beloved Father that their guilt presses upon him, but he does not sin by
resisting the One who has laid sin upon Him, nor does He apologize for or regret their covenant to
make this sacrifice. He makes no mischief, no pleas for sin to be acceptable in God's sight. No selfish
words of warfare dilute the power of the pure word of God. Amidst the crowd's reviling rage He meets
our crucial need."
Overwhelmed by how God's healing love in Jesus has ministered to my needy friend, I
confront my own need. I had been quick to join in sin's work of accusing God of forsaking His Truth on
Calvary and in His promises of Scripture. How could I miss His supreme truth? My God had not given
up on Him or on me. He has given all in Him that I and any who'll believe in Jesus can gain
everlasting, abundant life.
Father, only the needy can really see what Jesus has done. Show me how needy I am. Show me how
much I need Jesus. Amen.
In the daily struggle for love to sustain your inner well-being, do you ever have to fight off the feeling
that your sins have caused God to turn His back on you?
Are you tempted to read your apparent losses as signs that God has stopped blessing you?
Do you fear that God accuses you of sin and punishes you by removing your friends and things?
Have you tried to open your eyes to the benefits that accrued in your life before you had to part with
whatever is gone?
Have you dared to believe that the God who supplied the former joys is able and eager to add new
ones, as you keep trusting His will to work in your behalf?
Could it be that focusing on the gifts to the exclusion of the Giver makes us near-sighted and blinds us
to the greatest gift of all--Calvary?
When we cannot hear Jesus singing our song, perhaps it's because we need to hear Him praying our
prayer in our behalf: "My God, My God, why hast Thou forsaken Me?" He knows exactly how we feel.
July 16
What Is Darkness?
"Now from the sixth hour there was darkness over all the land unto the ninth hour. And about the
ninth hour Jesus cried ..., My God, My God, why hast thou forsaken me?" Matthew 27:45, 46.
What is darkness? It is the time between the light we had and the light ahead. Some
darkness is merely our own indigo ignorance which lofty points of light dispel, as life's essence dawns
on us. Some learning comes not from lofty distances, but from hand-to-hand combat in life's
threatening situations. As in Genesis 32:24 Jacob wrestled in the darkness to keep a safe distance
between him and God, we also wrestle. We resist the light of God's truth as long as we can fight and
until our need to hold onto God dawns upon us.
Another darkness exists. It confronts us at noon when we, beaming with the bright yellow
sunlight of God's transparent truth, seem surrounded by the oppressive darkness of death at work
among us. We feel the heat is on us to enlighten these dwellers of darkness, but the more light we
give, the more evil opposes us and blinds dark minds to their need. We struggle in this darkness until
we see that only love's warmth can rescue them from the darkness they clutch for fear of exposure to
danger.
What is darkness? It is God's hiding place wherein He meets us in our weakness at our points
of need. Unseen He draws close to us in the heat of the day lest we faint under our heavy burdens of
distrust, depression, guilt, anxiety, and grief while He reveals our sins which cause these deathinviting attitudes. In His mercy He allows the darkness they create that we may learn to recognize
their darkness as symptoms of dynamics wrecking our relationships. Only an enemy would lighten
our darkness by removing our symptoms while blinding us to their cause, then leave us to die of our
diseases. As the sun's heat rises, symptoms of our sins increase until by life's noonday darkness
engulfs us. But God stays in our darkness until we see our need to ask Him why we feel forsaken by
Him and wait to hear His answer.
What is darkness? It's the dressing room wherein we find protection from the pain of
exposing our sin-caused wounds to the heavenly healer. In it the shame of our nakedness is hidden
from curious eyes and cruel enemies. In it the robe of righteousness that was woven in the darkness
on Calvary is fitted to our size. That Calvary darkness shaded Him from blistering sun and cowering
enemies. It reverently covered Jesus, as He placed the sins of the world before God, who had cloaked
His presence in the darkness of faith and hope. It made a way by which God, who cannot bear to see
sin destroy His beloved, could hide His face from its horror and protect the dignity of His Son "who for
the joy that was set before Him endured the cross, despising its shame, and is set down at the right
hand of the throne of God." Hebrews 12:2.
Lord, help me to see You at work in my life even in the darkness that signals the presence of sins that
I need to let You remove from me. Amen.
Try to find examples that show the two types of darkness we encounter:
1) your own ignorance; 2) others' ignorance.
How clear cut is the distinction?
Do your struggles with their ignorance stem from your lack of knowledge to deal with them?
Are you more likely to see yourself or them as doing evil?
Is love (attention to others' needs) the first thing you use to dispel darkness in your relationships?
Or are you more likely to prove that you are right and the others are wrong?
How do you define darkness?
Do you veil your presence in figurative darkness to protect others from feeling embarrassed over sins
or errors?
Have you ever felt forsaken by God when you feel depressed, guilty, anxious, or grief-stricken?
Can you see His love in wanting to expose the causes of your ill feelings and remove them instead of
just erasing your dark symptoms?
Do you listen for God's answers to "WHY me? or why the darkness of distrust, depression, guilt,
anxiety, grief, discontent, or remorse?" As we study, we find answers.
July 17
Expect Zero
"I am the light of the world: he that followeth Me shall not walk in darkness, but shall have the light of
life."
John 8:12. "Ye are the light of the world." Matthew 5:14.
With so much to see in such a dark world, we have lingered long at the cross to understand
the darkness and to savor the safety of God's presence with us near our OUT BACK door that is labeled
CORRECT with Obedience. We're ready to have Jesus light the way to cure our "feet that be swift in
running to mischief" and thus remove the grief it causes us. "Jesus, we came to you as Neighbor and
Needy and found that we are both needy. What light can You give to CORRECT this "mischief"
behavior that God hates? How can we deal with the debts that we keep assigning to each other that
neither of us know how to pay?"
"We have seen Lena use mischief to exact and collect the debts she held against Les. She
measured the loss to be the difference between what he gave her and what she expected. The more
she weighed her loss, the worse it became. The worse it got, the more she expected from him to fill
the gap and close the rift between them. So she escalated his debt to keep pace with her rising
expectations. The 5-sized loss that he had easily ignored became 50, which he labeled as unjust.
After a time the 50-sized loss grew to 500, and then to 5000. Unable to pay the 5-sized debt, he was
certainly unable to meet any greater expectations she had.
"Expectations of riches drove her into poverty. The 5-sized debt against Les registered as a 5unit loss in her life's ledger. The 50, 500, and 5000 amounts of debt she had assigned to Les
deepened her losses to 50, 500, and 5000, respectively. With each increase she herself sunk deeper
into the hole from which she dug the figures for his debt. None of the dirt or mischief that she threw
at him in her attempts to prove herself correct and to try to collect, did anything to pay her for her
trouble. By her talk and her walk she ran herself into debt's dark hole. The path she followed to
mischief did nothing to light her world or her life."
Jesus states that following Him will lead to the light of life, not the darkness of grief. It makes
more sense to expect Him to do what He says than it does to expect others to do what I say. In fact,
if I expect ZERO from others, I will not suffer the losses Lena did. Any gift they give will be more than
I expected. I can joyously appreciate the tiniest gifts if clouds of unmet expectations are not casting
shadows of disappointment and loss over them. Those who give nothing will have no power to write
LOSS in the ledger of my life, unless I am expecting to sustain my life with the favors I place them in
debt to pay to me. Nothing that I do not expect can cause me to feel loss. The light of the world has
power to light my life whether others do or don't give me love.
Lord, as I follow You, use me to light Your world. Amen.
Whom do you hold in debt for love that seems to be withheld from you?
Have you succeeded in forcing these people, who lack love, to pay you the love you may have every
"right" to expect from them?
Do you feel a growing loss of love in your relationships with them?
Do you blame them for it and imagine that your love keeps increasing as theirs lessens?
Or do you feel youve already earned their love?
Do you plan to refuse to give or do any more for them until they pay the debt of love they owe you?
Do you try to shut your eyes to God's truth about their inability to pay you, or do you value the light
He gives you regarding their dilemma?
Do you expect zero from them or insist that they pay because you count on their love to sustain your
life?
Is it wise to count on someone other than God to sustain your sense of well-being? Why or why not?
July 18
How Mercy Operates
"Blessed are the merciful: for they shall obtain mercy." Matthew 5:7.
Newly aware of how futile it is to pressure people to pay what they do not have, we form a
new question: How shall we relate to the people who are in debt to us? Our love has been given, and
our loss has already been recorded in our ledger. And yes, we do need their payments to sustain us.
We have not learned to expect zero.
Jesus points our thoughts to His Sermon on the Mount and speaks His fifth beatitude:
"Blessed are the merciful: for they shall obtain mercy." Matthew 5:7. The first step of CORRECTION
provides us with this promise. To love God with all our heart at this stage of relating, we must trust
that Jesus can use it to cure our problem. We mull over its implications for dealing with loss. Mercy is
God's love especially designed for paying debts that people can't pay. The merciful meet needs even
though they are not paid to do it. How does it work?
"Lord, Les owes me love. Please force him to pay me the love he owes."
"Lena, I don't force you or Les to love Me. Why do you suppose I would force Les to love you?
Les does not love because he has no love to give."
"Then, Lord, will You give Les the love he needs so he can pay me what he owes? Is Your love
greater than his 5000-sized debt?"
"Yes, Lena, My love is far greater than his lack of love for you. But tell Me, how did Les incur
such a huge debt to you? Who brought it against him?"
"I did," Lena replies, "I told him he owes it to me. It's the very debt I brought against him for
all the love I gave him, love he has not returned to me."
"I see, so it's YOUR debt caused by the love you GAVE him. If you GAVE him love, he owes you
nothing. I don't have to give him the mercy required to cover that amount. It's your debt, not his.
Your love creates no debt for him."
"But, Lord, don't you see that I need love to sustain my life? I can't live without love. I need it
to pay my debts. How can I keep loving him, if I receive no new love to give?"
"Ah, at last you see your own need for My mercy, My debt-paying love. New love comes from
Me. Now I can freely give My love directly to you and meet every need for love you have. My mercy
forgives your debts to Me. Use it freely to forgive the debts you hold against your debtors. Recognize
that the debts you put on others are really your own, not theirs. Trust that I've paid your debts
against others for you with My mercy. It's easy to forgive a debt that someone else has already paid
because that debt no longer exists."
Lord, I see how You can forgive my debts, as I am forgiving my debtors. I'm glad Your loving mercy
toward me is always greater than my need for it. Amen.
Think of someone who has not returned to you the love you expected to gain.
Have you hoped that God would convince that person to love you?
Have you resisted the idea of gaining the love you need from God rather than from that person?
Do you object to asking for mercy when you don't think you've done anything wrong?
Is it false witnessing to charge that people owe us what they don't?
How does moving God's love to the person and then to you differ from getting the love directly from
God?
What advantage is there in getting love directly from God?
But do you feel that you earned it from the person rather than from God?
Must we earn love to feel entitled to claim it?
How can love be freely given, not paid, if we think we have worked to earn it?
Does refusing unearned love indicate that we want to "be as gods" (Genesis 3:5) who can "produce"
our own love (by the work we do to earn it), so well not have to depend on our Creator to sustain us?
How much mercy do your neighbors need from you?
July 19
Who Is Merciful?
"With the merciful thou wilt show thyself merciful; with an upright man thou wilt show thyself
upright."
Psalm 18:25.
Does God make mistakes? If so, I'm willing to forgive Him, but not before it's clear that He is
aware of what He's done. This idea God has that I need His mercy when my friends neighbors are the
real offenders does not sit well with me. Let's review the history. For weeks I worked freely for my
friends. I did every favor that they asked. Free, mind you. I met every demand without any
complaints, hoping for some appreciation and perhaps a little love. I was the ideal Nice Guy, or Nice
Gal, if you prefer. But what did I get for it? Right. Nothing--unless you count the few seasonal
benefits of being a nice guy: the flattery people spring, the summer heat of their angry accusations,
the rejection as they fall out of relationship with me, and their wintry ice of scorn. They are like
broken vending machines who can only respond to my favors with behavior that reads like Out Of
Order signs. O. O. O.! (Also read as zeroes, empty of love.)
Well, as a Nice Guy, I'm upright with people, so why shouldn't I expect them to be upright with
me? How is it that, after all my hard work to win their love, God portrays them to be free of any
responsibility to love me in return? I just can't see it, so I did what most do. I converted my favors
into "professional deeds" for which I expected to be paid. It's only right. If they had wanted me to
keep doing free favors for them, they would've done favors for me in return. (The few they did do I
don't count; they were things I didn't need, and they had no value to me.) Can you tell me why I
should do anything free for these people? It was bad enough when I was loving people who had
nothing to give, but now the people God expects me to freely love actually owe me for the things I've
already given them. If I give them any more, they just go deeper into debt. Then I have to absorb
more losses, and become a bigger loser. I don't like being a loser, and I hate worse being viewed as a
loser in the eyes of others, let alone God. Yet He wants me to think that I'm the needy one who's
burdened with debts. Get this! He offers me mercy, free debt-paying love, to cover what He
considers to be MY debts, even though others owe them to me. He says, "Blessed are the merciful,
for they shall obtain mercy."
Merciful? Hold it. Does He mean that only the merciful--the people willing to freely pay
others' debts with His freely-given mercy--shall obtain mercy? But I'm NOT merciful. In fact, I'm
anything BUT that. I dont even feel goodor upright, for that matter. I see I need mercy. Im glad He
still offers mercy to pay my debts, so I can become mercy-full. Im glad God does loves me simply
because I need it, not because I do or dont deserve it. He wants me to love as He lovesbecause
they need it, not because they do or dont deserve it.
"Lord, is there hope for me? I've falsely witnessed about You against my neighbor by saying I
love him, as You love me. What a lie my get-love behavior has told about you! Have mercy on me."
Lord, how can I become merciful as You are? Amen.
Do you think God has made mistakes in responding to problems you have with your ex-friends?
Examples?
Do you think God is just, let alone merciful, in expecting you to be able to forgive--not just forgive and
forget, but forgive and remember to keep on loving those who are apparently in debt to you?
Do you know any Nice Guys--people who try to do whatever any demand of them just to be nice?
Are you a Nice Guy or Gal, in that sense?
Think of the "losers" that you know. Why do you label them losers? Is it because they owe you
something?
Or is it because you owe them and they complain because you didn't pay them back?
How did you incur the debts?
Did their so-called favors get converted into debts because you failed to "return the favors"?
If you didn't return the favor, why not? Was it becausein your mind-- they had nothing more to
give you that you wanted? Was it because they didn't deserve what they were asking?
Or was it because you truly did not see a need they had for you to meet?
Do ever feel you're being treated as a loser after you have done a kind deed?
Is doing a kind deed without pay something only Nice Guys who end up as losers do? I hope not.
July 20
Sea of Mercy
"The publican, standing afar off, would not lift up so much as his eyes unto heaven, but smote...his
breast, saying, God be merciful to me a sinner." Luke 18:13.
The Neighbor-Needy issues of life and death come into sharper focus as we stand near the
light of the world. Somehow the deadliness of our dastardly deeds becomes more apparent when
measured beside Christ rather than among ourselves. We have thought that good neighbors are
people who ask nothing of us and stay outside the periphery of our personal agendas. It seems that
only losers borrow, so if they can't return things, they have no business borrowing from us. But if we
need something, they should know that we are honest people who give love for love and thanks for
favors. We see no reason why Jesus would not agree with us.
Having spelled out our idea of how we want to be treated as we stand in our Neighbor role, we
do our best to be the kind of neighbor we prefer to have. We ask nothing of our neighbors. We stay
away from involvement in their agendas. We borrow nothing that we can buy for ourselves at the
store. And we refuse any payment other than thanks for the favors we rarely do. These definitions of
good neighbors are enshrined in our culture, and we do not expect to see a welcome mat out for any
who try to redefine them.
Good neighbors do not disturb the status in quo. We live as on islands in the ocean of Gods
love, and venture into its supposedly shark-filled waters only to do what we must to float our own
boats. With noses high and feet dry we watch the hungry, thirsty, naked, sick, imprisoned strangers
to our world go by. We need Gods mercy to equip us to minister to them, but mercy makes waves
that rock boats. As good neighbors we avoid any mercy-splashing moves that could get us labeled
all wet by those who scorn any attempt to highlight needs in the midst of a sea of plenty. We dare
not plumb the depths of God's love in behalf of the needy among our neighbors. Even the needy
shrink from discovery, as though to be found is to be drowned in shame and consumed by sharks.
Our own fear of sharks prevents us from diving in to minister to the invisible needy among us, lest we
be attacked for trying to make our selfish neighbors look bad. We dare not disturb the surface view
that all is well among us. But we are good neighbors--good neighbors with a bad problem: we lack
mercy. How can we obtain mercy for the needy if we refuse to come to God as needy sinners and ask
Him for His mercy?
Mercy is love freely given to cover sins or debts for which we cannot pay, hence it is always
undeserved. But again, God does not use deserved or undeserved as determiner of whom or how
much He loves: He uses need. (Philippians 4:19.) We must recognize that our shriveled notions of
being good neighbors are void of the water of God's love. We must know that receiving it means
changing our form from shriveled prunes to plum good neighbors. We must realize that we cannot on
our own ever return to the sinless state of being plum good. Such goodness can only be ours as
God's Spirit of goodness dwells in us. The sharks? They are mere figments of our fears to cross the
barrier between the have's and the have not's, lest we set precedents that press others to offer help
or to ostracize us for making them look bad. Any creatures who really live by drinking in God's ocean
of love and mercy will never become threats to our neighborhoods.
To our list of roles we must add Needy. Just as we must be children before parents,
students before teachers, and workers before bosses, we must know we are needy sinners before we
can become good neighbors.
God, be merciful to me a sinner; make me a good neighbor who knows what it's like to stand in the
needy's shoes. Amen.
What is your definition of a good neighbor?

Is it tempting to be a nice guy toward neighbors who need nothing and to remain aloof from the
needy ones?
Are you needy in that you sense a need to minister to the needy surrounding you?
Do you have a need to first discover their needs before you can minister to them?
Are you glad that God is quick to give us what we need and slow to give us what we deserve?
How does this fact impact your life style?
Do you really want God to "supply ALL your need according to His riches in Christ Jesus"? Philippians
4:19.
If He equips you to be a need-meeting neighbor, youll have no "good" reason not to love others as
Jesus loves.
July 21
Barrier-freeing Forgiveness
"And forgive us our debts, as we forgive our debtors." Matthew 6:12.
Reconciled to the fact that we do have debts and cannot deny that we create them and place
them on others, we accept our need to become merciful. But we cannot gain that divine quality on
our own. "Lord, now we trust the truth of Your promise for mercy with all our heart, but that's not
enough to make us merciful."
"You're right, it's not," Jesus replies. "In your neighbor role you need to love God with all your
soul by communicating with Him through Me, your indwelling Hope. Pray, "And forgive us our debts,
as we forgive our debtors." Then believe with all your soul that He does administer forgiveness within
you.
This fifth petition of the Lord's prayer just fits our need to have the fifth beatitude promise
acted out in us. It gives us the words we need to admit that we do have debts that we want to have
forgiven. We do qualify to receive God's mercy, His freely-given debt-paying love, and thus become
mercy-full. We can know that God's way of dealing with debts really works. We need not try to get rid
of our debts by converting them into duties for others.
Jesus sends us to His Father for forgiveness, knowing that His heavenly storehouse holds
ample forgiveness which is merely waiting for us to request it. At Calvary Jesus' first act of mercy was
to invite His Father to activate heaven's forgiveness account for all who'd want their sins, which cause
death, to be paid by the death of God's Lamb. Jesus chose death so He'd not lose us to death. John
6:39 says, "And this is the Father's will which hath sent Me, that of all which He hath given Me I
should lose nothing, but should raise it up again at the last day."
Forgiveness is the marvel that removes the barriers between us and God. Forgiveness means
that nothing we've thought or said or done can block God's love from us. Sin and guilt are gone. He
can supply every need we have. He can rekindle the light of truth and love in our relationships. Not
even death can create barriers between our forgiven souls and our forgiving Father and His Son.
Every day a man walks to the edge of his yard and peers down along the property line
between him and his Neighbor. He checks to see that the line is still straight between them. He
wonders what good or evil will cross the line in which direction, so he'll know where they stand with
one another. He reviews what's on his side and what's not. One day his eye moves from the line to
where his Neighbor's cross is lifted in love for him. He learns the lot next to him is his now and its
name is gateway to life. The property line vanishes. Now by faith he moves freely between here and
his new land and invites needy friends to join him in finding forgiveness.
Father, forgive our debts, as we forgive our debtors. Amen.
Pretend a friend needs your forgiveness.

Would you be content with just knowing that you have a forgiving spirit toward him?
Or would you want him to recognize his need and ask for forgiveness?
How can you encourage him to face his need and ask for it?
What help for him do you include with the forgiveness you give him?
Do you know people whom you trust to give you whatever you need?
Do they rely on you to tell them what you need?
Or do they load you with needless articles, hoping to guess your need?
Would it be easier to state your needs if you knew they had endless supplies of money and goods
awaiting your request?
Did you ever need forgiveness from someone?
Were you content to suppose that you had it without asking for it?
Once forgiven, do you relate anxiously in fear of making a mistake, or do you relate as though that
person has endlessly forgiving love for you?
Which is better?
How does God want us to relate to Him when we need His forgiveness?
July 22
A True Witness is Merciful
"..ye were not redeemed with...silver and gold, from your vain conversation received by tradition from
your fathers; But with the precious blood of Christ, ...that your faith and hope might be in God." I
Peter 1:18-21.
When we have all the money we need, it is easy to forget about the debts we owe. We can do
without the good will of our unpaid lender. We can even temporarily forget about debts others owe
us. The possession of money seems to give a mistaken sense of security. The term, debts, sounds as
though dollars can suffice to cover them, but our sins are not merely nickel and dime debts. Nor can
the debts sin creates be paid with silver or gold. They cost the blood of Jesus. We can only receive
our payment of these debts by receiving the Son, who died for us, into our lives. Since God supplies
our needs according to His riches in Christ Jesus, then our needs are not supplied until we gain His
riches IN Christ.
It is not enough to trust that God can give us mercy, and to ask Him to forgive our debts with
it. We must love God with all our mind and choose to allow His riches in Christ Jesus to enter our
lives. When we choose to submit our own mind to His will as He dwells in us, He eagerly gives us His
riches contained within the mind of Christ. He who chose to die that He might live in us awaits our
choice to let Him give us life's essentials, including fourfold health.
Choosing the mind of Christ includes choosing the promises He has in His mind for us. We
need two promises in our Neighbor-Needy roles so what we do can match who we claim to be. The
BEING promise is beatitude 5, Blessed are the merciful: for they shall obtain mercy. The DOING
promise is Commandment IX: Thou shalt not bear false witness against thy neighbor. We must be
merciful in order to truly witness of God's character in merciful ways that do not work against our
neighbor's well-being.
When I choose His promises and agree to let Him fulfill them in me, I am ready for step four in
His First Love Commandment: You shall love the Lord thy God with all your strength. When God has
us choose Him, He wants to follow through by fulfilling His promises to us. It matters not that we are
weak. He asks only that we keep His promises to us; HE fulfills them in us. His strength overcomes
our weaknesses in witnessing. "My grace is sufficient for thee: for My strength is made perfect in
weakness." 2 Corinthians 12:9.
Now fully equipped with the provisions that solve the problem that keeps us from valuing
God's truth, we have completed our session of CORRECT with Obedience. We have prayed for
forgiveness, we have accepted the presence of Jesus, who pays for our sins, and allowed Him to write
His law in our hearts and minds. No longer do our feet swiftly run to the mischief that causes grief.
Now in sympathy we bear true witness of Him by doing merciful deeds, as He did. Now we show by
our deeds that we have obtained mercy and are indeed merciful. We watch the back Door open to us
the chance to love our neighbors.
Lord, You gave me Jesus to pay my debts to You. I choose You to empower me to be and do what
pleases You. Amen.
Are the non-attention-getting tasks getting the attention they need from you?
The tasks of choosing what promises we treasure and what we shall allow Christ to do in us may not
attract attention,
but they are essential in building partnerships. We cannot ignore them.
Have you chosen to let Christ dwell in you and write His ninth commandment in your mind and heart,
so He can cause you to become a merciful, true witness of Him to your neighbors?
Have you seen that our own grief is lessened, as we allow sympathy for others' needs to motivate our
behavior?
July 23
The Needy World Is Waiting.
"All Scripture is...profitable for teaching, for reproof, for correction, for training in righteousness; that
the man of God may be...equipped for every good work." 2 Timothy 3:16, 17 NASB.
With a light step and lighter hearts, we step from our boxed-in world through the door Jesus
opens to us, as we enter the sunny fourth phase of building Neighbor-Needy covenant partnerships.
We turn to thank Him for His loving Correction, and we see the outer side of the back door where
counsel for moving BACK IN to covenant relating is posted. Beneath the BACK IN label is written TRAIN
with Work of Grace.
We see diagramed upon it God's Family Circle portraying each covenant partnership we have
studied nestled neatly in concentric circles to show how they relate one to the other and yet move
freely, as wheels within wheels. The cross in the center is surrounded by the violet, indigo, blue,
green, and now yellow circles of color. Each smaller circle securely in place makes it possible for each
larger circle to surround it and build upon it. We see that the circles follow the path of growth that a
person takes in developing Christian character. First the wisdom of parenting, next the knowledge of
teaching, then the understanding of covenant loving, followed by the prosperity of managing, and
now in bright yellow the health of neighbor-needy--all working by God's grace to guide growing
Christians into the fullness of joy that God has for His children.
We need all the good that they offer--the decision-making skills for guiding, the learning for
teaching, the submission for making commitments, the producing that we may provide, and the grace
to receive that we may give. With this set of tools we are equipped for the training process of
learning to love our needy neighbors.
We almost forget the problem of grief, self-directed pity, that plagued our boxed-in world and
prevented us from valuing the truth about our neighbor and needy roles. Now the sunlight of God's
mercy overshadows the darkness of mischief that had overtaken us. Now sympathy for the needs
others have to achieve emotional, spiritual, mental, and physical health holds our attention. In the
new yellow light of God's truth we see a needy world awaiting our healing message of God's love for
them.
The truth is that man's condition is worse than we had supposed when we were hoping to
depend upon the love of the world to meet our needs. Then we tried to blind ourselves to the real
truth in the hope that the world could give what we now know it does not have. But now the heat is
on, the need is obvious and grave, the work is apparently endless. With Jesus we say, "I must work
the works of Him that sent me, while it is day: the night cometh, when no man can work." John 9:4.
Lord, open my eyes to see the needy that You can help through me. Amen.
How does your world view change when you stop focusing on yourself in grief and adopt a
sympathetic view of the needs that surround you?
In planning what you can do, survey your skills and look to see where you can make a difference.
In view of the great need surrounding you, are you tempted to think that the little you can do will
make no difference in the grand scheme of things?
Recall someone who found you among the millions in need and ministered to you?
What difference has it made to you?
As you scan the needy surrounding you, whom do you see being ignored?
July 24
Righteousness Is a Triplet
"I must work the works of Him that sent Me.." John 9:4.
Few things in life bring more satisfaction than knowing that one has done a good job in
completing an essential task. People who excel at their work are considered master workers. One
path to becoming a master worker is to apprentice oneself to a master at the job he seeks to learn.
As we train in righteousness, we face a problem: "There is none righteous, no, not one." Romans
3:10. That means we are not wise to copy human beings in the area of righteousness, if we wish to
become well trained in living righteously. It also means that any true righteousness we exhibit will
not be ours but God's. As we value the truth promised to us in "Thou shalt not bear false witness
against thy neighbor", we know we cannot bear witness of Jesus unless we do live righteously, as He
did. To do so we need to pursue God's righteousness, not self's false righteousness. False
righteousness, like counterfeit money, may resemble the true in appearance, but its claim to value is
not legitimate. Its only power lies in its ability to deceive and exploit the ignorant.
"Thus saith the Lord, Let not the wise man glory in his wisdom, neither let the mighty man
glory in his might, let not the rich man glory in his riches: But let him that glorieth glory in this, that
he understandeth and knoweth Me, that I am the Lord which exercise lovingkindness, judgment, and
righteousness, in the earth: for in these things I delight, saith the Lord." Jeremiah 9:23, 24. The selfrighteous wise man may glory in how much wiser he is than the needy, who, in his opinion, deserve
their lot in life for not making wiser decisions.
But he will extend no healing ministry of
lovingkindness to them. The self-righteous mighty man may pronounce his "might makes right"
motto to sanction his efforts to see that the fittest survive at the expense of the weak, but he will not
use his muscle to strengthen the hand of the needy or his mouth to plead their just causes. The selfrighteous rich man will count himself greatly blessed of God because he's such a righteous man, but
he will not spend a nickel of love or cash to promote the righteous causes of the needy or give a dime
toward the discovery of the kingdom of God wherein righteousness dwells.
Self-righteous people star the beings they are, and tar the doings of the needy to justify doing
nothing to meet their needs. But Righteousness is a triplet who never betrays or stands aloof from
her two sisters, lovingkindness and Judgment.
The Master Trainer in righteousness counsels us to "Seek ye first the kingdom of God and His
righteousness; and all these things shall be added unto you." Matthew 6:33 What is it? "The
kingdom of God is...righteousness, and peace, and joy in the Holy Ghost. For he that in these things
serveth Christ is acceptable to God, and approved of men." Romans 14:17, 18.
Lord, train me in righteousness to love the needy. Amen.
When athletes train for victory, countless spectators are ready to tell them how to perform. But the
wise athlete listens to his trainer who has mastered the techniques that work.
In your efforts to love the needy, do you have spectators shouting their opinions of your errors and
demanding that you do what they say?
Give an example of someone's unwise attempt to change your course.
Do you keep in touch with the Master Trainer in righteousness and follow His counsel despite the
noise spectators make when you resist their pressure?
Many claim to speak for the Master.
Do you measure their counsel with the Scripture to test its truthfulness? with their lives to test its
fruitfulness?
Do you have a training program in place for learning to meet needs?
How do lovingkindness and judgment accompany your exercise of righteousness in relating?
Are you more focused on making things right with/for others than on looking righteous yourself?
July 25
Remember the Day!
"For if ye forgive men their trespasses, your heavenly Father will also forgive you:" Matthew 6:14.
Apprenticed to Jesus, let's look at His words, listen, and learn some lessons about loving the
needy. A needy person is one, who, regardless of how much or little he has, lacks what he needs to
deal successfully with the trial he faces. He may not even know his need until the trial before him
confronts him with it. So it was with Peter in Matthew 14:30. He had dared to walk on the water at
the command of Jesus, never before having been on top of its surface in the calm, let alone when
boisterous winds were blowing. Jesus quickly answered his cry, "Lord, save me." and caught him.
Can you imagine how you would feel toward one who rescued you from drowning? I can
imagine an unending song of deepest gratitude flowing from me to my rescuer each time I'd see him.
I can hear myself saying to him, "I remember the day you rescued me from drowning. Is there any
way I can help you? Do you need anything I can get for you? Do your children need any help?" I
would never tire of nor retire from showing my loving gratitude to him.
When we forgive men their trespasses against us, we rescue them from the sea of guilt that
drowns their hope that we could ever love them. They become willing to hear our counsel, to
cooperate with our efforts to meet their needs. The ability to forgive others keeps us in the driver's
seat with those we can forgive. They gladly move with us along the road toward total fourfold health.
[Forgivers in drivers seats must avoid exploiting the forgiven by trying to control them. Next month
we study the need to govern self in ways that bless others.]
The joy of knowing that Jesus fully saves us from dying in our sins reminds us of the joy of
knowing that we are fully saved from drowning. We often remember the day He pulled us out of the
sea of guilt that was overwhelming us. We eagerly respond in love to Him. We ask, "How can we help
You? Do You have any needy children we can help?" We look around us for others who still feel as we
felt. We know their torment: we cannot be silent about Jesus' power to lift them from despair.
We must beware of diluting our joy in Gods gift of salvation to us. We do God no favor by
harassing ourselves with a steady stream, or even a constant drip, of guilty feelings about our
forgiven sins, as though some pious benefit could be derived from doubting God's work of grace.
Such doubt-stained faith takes the edge off the joy of His gift of life, spoils our song of gratitude to
God, kills our enthusiasm for serving Him, and pushes Jesus from the driver's seat in our lives. As we
value God's truth about His mercy and freely accept His deliverance from death, we gain sympathy
for others who need it. Do you know by experience that Jesus can empower you to walk and run and
sing and dance on His water? Try it. You'll never, ever drown in His water of life.
Lord, I'm glad you rescued me from the sea of guilt. Do any of Your children need my help? Are any
You love struggling in that deadly sea? Send me. Amen.
How do you want your children to feel when forgiven?

Do you want them loaded with lingering guilt feelings or restored to lighthearted joy?
Do you respond to your heavenly Father's forgiveness with lingering guilt or with joy?
Which response bears a true witness of His love? which, a false?
Does guilt residue, which hinders us from loving God and man, bring any benefit into our covenant
love relationships?
Do we need it?
Why then do we entertain such an unnecessary evil?
We have a true (or false) choice in the matter.
July 26
Forgiving Shows I'm Forgiven.
"And the lord commended the unjust steward, because he had done wisely: for the children of this
world are in their generation wiser than the children of light." Luke 16:8.
In two parables Jesus presented two examples of how people deal with forgiveness. The one
in Matthew 18:23-35 describes the servant who owed the king a debt that a lifetime of work could
never repay. The servant begged for the king to be patient until he paid it all, but the king knew he
held the servant's only hope, so he offered his forgiveness of the servant's debt. Then the servant
found a fellowservant who owed him a pittance by comparison to his own debt the king had forgiven.
Still he demanded payment of it. He refused to listen to his debtor's pleas for patience until he could
pay. Instead, he had him cast into debtor's prison.
When the king heard of his servant's unforgiving spirit, he rebuked him and delivered him to
the tormentors until he should pay his impossible debt to the king. What shall we think? Did the king
change his mind and take back his forgiveness? Did he withdraw it because the servant did not
forgive? No, what seems to be the king's refusal is really the servant's rejection of the gift.
Forgiveness cannot reside where it is denied the freedom to function. The king read the servant's
rejection in his refusal to forgive. Had he received the king's offered forgiveness, he would have had
on hand ample forgiveness for his fellow debtor. His unforgiving spirit showed that he had not truly
received what the king offered. His refusal to let forgiveness influence his attitude and actions made
it impossible for it to exist as a reality within him. It left the king no choice but to require payment
and deliver punishment. Our own slowness to forgive others can warn us that we are not letting God
forgive us of our own sins. God will show us wherein we are choosing grief over mercy if we read the
warnings.
The other parable in Luke 16:1-9 describes how the steward, facing the loss of his job,
contacted his employer's debtors and reduced their amounts of debt. He wanted to make friends who
would help him in time of need. Does Jesus commend this unjust steward to teach us to falsify
people's financial accounts and win friends for times of need? No, of course not. The steward was
unjust in forgiving debts that his employer hadn't authorized him to forgive.
But our Lord does command us to freely forgive debts. He does give His mercy to us so that
we may give it freely to forgive the debts of all who need it. His mercy fuels our sympathy. Unlike
grief which stocks self-pity pots, sympathy designs our deeds to meet others' needs. God wants His
debt-paying love freely invested in forgiving debts to win friends for His kingdom. Stewards of mercy,
not stewers of mischief, truly witness of Him to the needy.
Lord, use me to grasp the hand, not grab the collar, of those who need Your forgiving love. Amen.
Have you found yourself slow to forgive an essential friend who has fallen in debt to you?
Could it be that your supply of forgiveness is low or gone? You cannot give what you do not have.
It's a good time to ask God to show you wherein you're refusing His forgiveness in your own life.
What are you nagging yourself about that God is waiting to forgive?
Over what past sin do guilt feelings still linger? Ask God for His gift of repentance for the sin.
Once received, you will truly feel sorry. Express your repentance, ask, and claim His forgiveness.
God is waiting to remove that guilt and shame from the past that dogs you daily, and place you,
forgiven, in a position of honor.
God, our heavenly "boss", sends us to freely forgive all who are in debt to us.
Can you imagine what joy it would be to freely pass a bag of money to people who have debts waiting
to be paid? Would it be easy or hard to get people to take the money?
God wants us to take the bundle of mercy He gives us and lavish it upon any and all who need it. We
can be spendthrifts with God's forgiveness by spending what is needed to save the needy from
perishing in a sea of guilt.
July 27
Meekness Equips Us for Ministry
"But the fruit of the Spirit is love, joy, peace...faith, meekness." Galatians 5:22, 23.
In silence the Holy Spirit is at work in the Neighbor and the Needy who try to love one another
as Jesus loves. He uses commandment IX, Thou shalt not bear false witness against thy neighbor,
which He wrote in their hearts and minds. As He empowers His promise to operate in them and
teaches them to value God's truth, His Spirit fruit adds a new quality: meekness. In May we met
meekness, the willingness to learn, in the Lover-Friend role partnership. We needed it to be willing to
learn what it was like to be in another's shoes in order to apply the Golden Rule wisely. We learned
that God empowers us to love, to see needs and meet needs, so that His will can be done in earth and
in us, as it is in heaven.
Now that we know how to love, and how to be fueled with love by eating the Bread of life, this
month we face our need to actually love the people who need it. While we gladly stand in the shoes
of our lovers who have so much to offer, we do not naturally desire to stand in the shoes of our
debtors and other needy who have nothing to offer us that we want. But we do choose to have the
indwelling Holy Spirit empower us to do so. Our Spirit-given meekness moves us beyond the people
who do what they say, to the people who can't, won't, or don't do what they say. We see that God's
love is absent from their lives. Is it absent from ours? We wonder as we weigh our willingness to
stand in the shoes of one who is a loser with multiple deficiencies. We know that it will cost us to
treat him as we'd want to be treated. We realize that no benefits are likely to be gained. We have
plenty of "better" things to do. We hesitate to risk the frown of the proud for associating with him.
But despite the weight of the responsibility, we keep our commitment. We know too well that, but for
the work of God's grace in us, wed be at least as needy as they. And in a sense we are: their
increased need to receive increases our need to gain from God what we need to help them. Then we
can share God's love with all who need it.
The major task we face is forgiving the debts of the needy and giving the help they need to
gain their emotional, spiritual, mental, or physical health. In Luke 7:36-50 the meek and lowly Jesus
demonstrates forgiveness. As a guest at Pharisee Simon's home, He is approached by a needy
woman, thought to be Mary Magdalene. Simon had secretly led her into sin and knew her stained
condition. He scorned the wisdom of Jesus, Who allowed her to wash His feet with tears, wipe them
with her hair, kiss and anoint them. If He were really a prophet, Simon thought, wouldnt He know
she was an adulteress who should not be touching Him? Jesus, aware of Simon's thoughts, knew all
this. He knew that Simon stood in greater social jeopardy than did Mary. His reputation for religious
piety and perfection would be ruined if the Truth should expose his evil. But confessions forced do not
bring repentance that works reformation of character. Despite the fact that Simon had exploited a
woman Jesus loved, Jesus stood in Simon's shoes and invited him to repent by teaching him that he
who is forgiven little loves little, while she who is forgiven much can love much. Much forgiveness
fosters meekness, a willingness to learn to love much.
Why did not Jesus avenge the woman? As He stood in her shoes, He knew that forgiveness is
far sweeter than revenge. He did not make her joy dependent upon exposing Simon. What joy could
be found in being joined in sin to his name? He knew something better: "Thy sins are forgiven...go in
peace." And Jesus loved Simon. Perhaps His words would also move Simon to see his need for God's
mercy.
Lord, shall I excuse, expose, exploit, or love the needy? Amen.
Is it easier to love those who love you than to love those whose behavior shows they need love?
Do you think generosity with forgiveness improves the forgiven one's behavior or worsens it?
Do you differentiate between forgiving and excusing or ignoring sins?
Do you use the Golden Rule to avoid exposing sins that would ruin reputations and place sinners
beyond reach?
Has someone let you correct a mistake without exposing your error and embarrassing you?
Do you really value the spirit of forgiveness more than the spirit of revenge?
How do you think Simon may have responded later to Jesus' teaching?
Is our love wasted if people do not respond the way we hope they will?
July 28
Who Is My Neighbor?
"I was sick, and ye visited Me...sick...and ye visited Me not." Matthew 25:36, 43.
The symbolic road from Jerusalem to Jericho is downhill. It leads from a place of peace
wherein God's temple resides to a place where idolatry plagues its victims. By God's grace two-way
traffic is possible so idolaters can walk the road uphill from being palaces of self to becoming temples
of God. Along the literal Jericho road a man had fallen among thieves who had beaten him, bruised
him, and left him for dead. He was in critical need when the priest noticed him but passed him by,
unable to stop being religious long enough to help him. Then the Levite, perhaps a curious educator,
came for a closer look, maybe long enough to see to it that he was labeled disabled, as educators do
to assign blame when they're unwilling or unable to love to meet needs.
Then the Luke 10 Samaritan, schooled neither in their rules nor in their ethics, dared to walk
where these angelic authorities feared to tread. He experientially knew what Paul later stated: "I will
very gladly spend and be spent for you; though the more abundantly I love you, the less I be loved." 2
Corinthians 12:15. He knew that the proud do not love the neighbors who minister to them. To
express loving gratitude to their need-meeting neighbors is to admit that they are needy. The more
they need, the more they must be loved. Since the proud know nothing of unselfish love, they view
the loving help they're given as favors which must be repaid. Since they can only return so many
favors, they must limit the amount they let others love them. They limit their intake of love by
devaluing the love others give them, by rejecting their offers to help, and by diluting their responses
of loving gratitude with disapproval. In doing so they learn to be proud, arrogant, needless people.
Such needless men would have refused the Samaritan's love, but none stopped him from loving the
needy man they left to die.
Caring not whether he would be loved more or less by this dying man, he treated his wounds,
transported him to a resting place, spent what was needed, and promised to spend more as needed.
The meekness given him by the Holy Spirit of this universe's Good Samaritan empowered him to love
the sick man without hope of gain.
Millions traverse the symbolic Jericho Road between peace and self-idolatry. Many feel
beaten, bruised, and left for dead. We need meekness to face what we must learn about the
emotionally, spiritually, mentally, and physically sick people in order to treat their ailments, as we
would want ours to be treated. We must be willing to learn that our unselfish love grows greater in
quality and quantity by doing love, not by getting love from the loveless, needy, or needless people
who say by their sick behavior that they need to be restored to health. "I have showed you...ye ought
to support the weak, and to remember the words of the Lord Jesus, how He said, It is more blessed to
give than to receive." Acts 20:35.
Lord, can a thief who takes by force of the favor be worse than one who refuses to give?
receive so I can give. Amen.
May I
Why is it so hard to love our neighbors who help us?

Do you hate to greet guests when you don't look personally presentable? When our life is messed up
by unmet needs, do we expect those who come to help us to be willing to love us in our need-exposed
state?
Does fear of rejection, even when they are loving to help us, keep us from loving our neighbors?
Do we act inferior to reflect what we think they think about our needy state?
Do we expect to be devalued by them? Can we not see that they DO value AND love us as they meet
our needs? Have you ever felt so embarrassed by your needs that you dared not love a neighbor
helping you?
If you were that neighbor, would you rather see you with a shame-filled face or a glad, grateful, loving
smile? Would a loving response motivate you to want to help the needy again?
Can being cheery receivers help to increase our neighbors' love for giving, and thus speed their task
of restoring us to health, so we can also become equipped to be need-meeting neighbors?
Meekness makes us willing to receive whatever must be done to restore us to healthy states in which
we are free to love. Knowing Jesus, the truth, makes us free, debt-free, guilt-free, shame-free, free to
love our neighbors as they work to restore us to health. Perfecting love removes fear.
July 29
Meet the Greatest Neighbor
"This is My commandment, That ye love one another, as I have loved you." John 15:12. "And this
commandment have we from Him, That he who loveth God love his brother also." I John 4:21.
The hydrologic cycle through which water gives and receives its goodness illustrates how the
water of love moves constantly to bless mankind. From the moment of its descent from the sky it falls
on the just and on the unjust, where some is absorbed by the plants, some stomped into mud in the
soil, or some drained into underground reservoirs to feed the wells and springs. Some slides down
slopes into the ever widening creeks and rivers into the lakes and oceans to await the sun's kiss that
draws it skyward and cushions it in pillowy clouds until it rains down again upon the just and the
unjust. At many points along the way water appears to be wasted, but each drop does its intended
work without fail, so water abounds for all who place themselves within reach of it.
When the fullness of time was come, God's flow of love bundled in Jesus made its descent
from heaven and loosed its crimson flow amidst the dark clouds at Calvary. Through the centuries all
who reach for Him have felt His love bathe their bruises and heal their hearts. Just as the yellow sun
empowers the hydrologic cycle, so also the glorious Son of God empowers His Golden Rule that sends
His love in an endless stream for all to all. Often it may seem rejected, wasted, stomped into the
mud, unabsorbed where it's placed, even stolen by death into the ground, but no one or no thing can
destroy its mighty current of life-giving power. "For as the rain cometh down...so shall My word be
that goeth forth out of My mouth: it shall not return unto Me void, but it shall accomplish that which I
please, and it shall prosper in the thing whereto I sent it." Isaiah 55:11. "Cast thy bread upon the
waters: for thou shalt find it after many days." Ecclesiastes 11:1.
We may wonder if we are worthy to cast our lot with Jesus and become part of the stream of
His need-meeting lovers. Our need-exposed state hounds us to hide from His mercy glowing upon us.
We hate standing in the hard place of debt. We despise what seems so demeaning to us--this beaten,
bruised, left-for-dead condition sin has cast upon us. We think that giving is all glory, that all
receiving is wretched. But as our eyes follow the crimson stream of God's love to its Calvary source,
we see that glory wrapped in a beaten, bruised, broken-hearted, left-for-dead Lord. In a moment the
revelation of oneness that unites the receiver with the Giver lifts our hearts in praise, drops us to our
knees in prayer, and bows our heads in promise to let Him cause us to love one another, as He has
loved us. Oh, that we would flow with the holy rhythm of receiving and giving and receiving without a
pinch of pride to pollute the power that works within us. Love flows via our bruises in behalf of the
bruised for the sake of our bruised Lord.
Lord, You are my Greatest Neighbor, my greatest need. I'm glad that as I love you, my Neighbor, by
loving the needy, You meet my own great need. Amen.
The big picture of ever-flowing love finds a place of beauty for every truth we experience.
Do you have any experiences that don't seem to fit your picture of God's love for His world that Satan
has beaten and bruised and left for dead?
In the big picture nothing done in love is lost. Can you see how each drop of suffering for Jesus' sake
is as given to Him Who dissolves it in the glory that shall be revealed in us?
"For our light affliction, which is but for a moment, worketh for us a far more exceeding and eternal
weight of glory; while we look not at the things which are seen, but at the things which are not seen:
for the things which are seen are temporal; but the things which are not seen are eternal." 2
Corinthians 4:17, 18.
Can you see the evaporated water in the air? Is it there? Does your God-given love which seems to
evaporate from your relationship into thin air still work to accomplish God's will for you?
Do you daily replenish your working supply at the Source?
Are you aware of how much your brothers and neighbors resemble you? That being so, is there any
good reason to hide from them your God-given need to love or your need for God-given love?
July 31
Loving Use of Our Leisure Time
"To every thing there is a season, and a time to every purpose ..:. a time to love.." Ecclesiastes 3:1,
8.
LEISURE, A TIME TO LOVE

At last on this most tiring day I'd done the work that came my way.
I set my tools beside my desk and pondered what I might suggest
To those who always wait for me to entertain their company.
So far the best amusement parks had failed to light in them a spark.
I saw that gourmet did not ease the hunger of their selfish pleas.
The thought of wasting leisure time seemed almost equal to a crime.
No good idea I'd begun had by them e'er been labeled fun,
And yet they stood outside the door expecting me to offer more.
I spoke to God on bended knee, and asked Him to enlighten me.
And e'er I had to face the crew, I knew just what I had to do.
Of all my friends this was the sum: pleasure was their rule of thumb.
"Loving pleasure more than God" defined the leisure-loving crowd.
Among them I must find the few still eager for a clearer view
Of how to heal men's broken hearts and how to do their useful parts
In lining up the loving deeds by which we could meet crying needs.
The hungry long to taste the love that God is sending from above.
The thirsty souls drink sin in vain to find good ways to deaden pain.
Loveless strangers locked outside wait for our doors to open wide.
The shivering naked dare not show their need to anyone they know.
The sick seek folks that understand how to use need-meeting hands.
Imprisoned held in low regard wait within their barbed-wire yard.
And we, whom Jesus has set free, must help to stop their misery.
Equip us now and send us, Lord, to do the best we can afford.
Turn our leisure into time in which we do Your will sublime.
Without Your grace it could be we waiting for eternity
For a witness to arrive who cares if we are dead or 'live.
Oh God, empower us to be neighbors meeting needs we see.
by Norma Timm
Lord, what will it take to wake us to events about to shake us? Amen.
Do you resist the duty to meet needs (love) in your free time?
How can you restructure your leisure time to truly enrich your relationships?
The world wants to be free to do nothing about anything, free to be uninvolved in meeting needs.
Now that you know the truth that makes you free, what do you want to be free to do?
Since loving brings joy, whom and how can you love? How can you make worthy use of your leisure?

Revisjul Donfont9

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July 1

"FREELY YE HAVE RECEIVED, FREELY GIVE."

Recall when you have volunteered to help a group.

Recall a valued item in your house that a child broke.

Recall a time when an essential friend became depressed.

Although youth seem to be in a hurry, they sip life slowly.

Think of a time you were trying to help needy people.

What is your definition of a good neighbor?

Pretend a friend needs your forgiveness.

How do you want your children to feel when forgiven?

How do today's concepts relate to you?

Why is it so hard to love our neighbors who help us?

LEISURE, A TIME TO LOVE

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