EMOTIONS

Communication shapes our feelings, and feelings

shape our communication.

EMOTIONAL INTELLIGENCE

Ability to understand and manage ones own

emotions and to be sensitive to others feelings.

positively linked with:

self-esteem
life satisfaction
self-acceptance
healthy conflict management
relationships

WHAT ARE EMOTIONS?

Physiological Factors
Nonverbal Reactions
Cognitive Interpretations
Verbal Expression

PHYSIOLOGICAL CHANGES

Bodily changes occur:

Increased heart rate
Rise in blood pressure
Increase in adrenaline
Elevated blood sugar level
Slowing of digestion
Dilation of pupils
Churning stomach
Tense jaw

NONVERBAL REACTIONS

Observable changes:
Blushing, perspiring
Facial expression, posture
Vocal tone, rate

Ambiguous

Nonverbal behavior can cause emotional state

COGNITIVE INTERPRETATIONS

The mind impacts how we feel.

Experience of emotions comes from labels we give

VERBAL EXPRESSION

Used to display emotions

Use specific emotion words to represent intensity.
Annoyed Angry Furious
Pensive Sad Grieving
Content Happy Ecstatic
Anxious Afraid Terrified
Liking Loving Adoring

INFLUENCES ON
EMOTIONAL EXPRESSION

Personality (i.e. extrovert, neurotic)

Culture (i.e. display rules, norms & values)

Gender (men vs women, feminine vs masculine)

Social Conventions and Roles (unwritten rules?)

Fear of Self-Disclosure (risk unpleasant consequences)

Emotional Contagion transferring of emotions

PERSONALITY

There is a clear relationship between personality

and the way we experience and express emotions

Extroverts tend to report more positive

emotions
Neurotic individuals tend to report more
negative emotions

Personality doesnt have to govern your

communication satisfaction

CULTURE

A significant factor that influences emotional

expression in different cultures is whether that
culture is:

Individualistic (United States and Canada)

These cultures feel comfortable revealing their
emotions to people with whom they are close

Collectivistic (Japan and India)

These cultures prize harmony and discourage
expressions of negative emotions which may
upset relationships

GENDER

Biological sex and gender roles shape the ways

men and women experience and express their
emotions.

While men and women experience the same

emotions, there are differences in the ways they
express them.

SOCIAL CONVENTIONS

The unwritten rules of communication discourage

the direct expression of emotion

Emotion labor (shaped by social roles)

Managing or even suppressing emotions is both
appropriate and necessary

FEAR OF SELF-DISCLOSURE

In a society that discourages the expression of

emotions, revealing them can seem risky

Someone who shares feelings risks unpleasant

consequences:

others might misunderstand

might look like a sign of weakness
might make others uncomfortable
could be used against you

EMOTIONAL CONTAGION

The process by which emotions are transferred

from one person to another

Is it possible to catch someones mood?

GUIDELINES FOR EXPRESSING EMOTION

Recognize your feelings

Recognize the difference between feeling, talking, and acting

Expand your emotional vocabulary

Share multiple feelings

Consider when and where to express your feelings

Accept responsibility for your feelings

Be mindful of the communication channel

MANAGING DIFFICULT EMOTIONS

Facilitative

Debilitative

Contributes to effective
functioning.

Detracts from effective

performance.

Difference between the two isn't quality but degree.

- Intensity
- Duration

SOURCES OF DEBILITATIVE EMOTIONS

Physiology

Emotional Memory

Self-Talk

SELF-TALK

Interpretations people make of an event,

during the process of self-talk that
determine their feelings

Thoughts Cause Feelings

THOUGHTS CAUSE FEELINGS

Event

Thought

Feeling

Being called names

Ive done
something wrong

hurt, upset

Being called names My friend must be concern, sympathy

sick.
Hearing I love you This is a genuine
statement

delight

Hearing I love you Shes saying this to

manipulate me.

anger

Key is to reappraise the event through self-talk

(internal monologue)

IRRATIONAL THINKING &

DEBILITATIVE EMOTIONS

Fallacy of perfection (138)

Fallacy of approval (138)

Fallacy of should (140)

Fallacy of overgeneralization (140)

Fallacy of causation (141)

Fallacy of helplessness (141)

Fallacy of catastrophic expectations (142)

MINIMIZING DEBILITATIVE EMOTIONS

Monitor your emotional reactions

Note the activating event
Record your self-talk
Reappraise your irrational beliefs
offer an alternative way of thinking
that is more rational

JOURNAL SUGGESTIONS

Describe how the influences on emotional

expression (pg 121-125) have affected your
communication in an important
relationship.

Keep a two or three-day record of your

debilitative emotions. Are any of them
based on irrational thinking? Examine your
conclusions, and see if you repeatedly use
any of the fallacies described. How can you
reappraise your irrational beliefs?