Felicia Day: A Gamer Under Pressure.

In late 2014 Felicia sat at her computer screen, the gentle glow of the screen
reflecting off of her red hair as she poured her feelings into an online blog known as
Tumblr. Her feelings in response to bomb threats, death threats, DDoS (Distributed
Denial of Service) attacks, and many other alarming criticisms.
This was Gamergate: a series of attacks on several women who identified
themselves as gamers and game developers. A war on the women, critics, and
feminists who care about making gaming more diverse and inclusive. It was an
event filled with misogynistic ideas and went fairly under the radar with popular
news sources. The effects, however, still echo through much of the gaming
community. While a news source such as NBC or CNN wouldnt necessarily cover the
events, a lot of game journalists and reporters were the major source of information,
much of it skewed by opinions and heavily biased. It was an atrocious reminder that
there are several issues with game journalism, and the community in general.
In an interview with refinery29.com Felicia answered what it was like to be a
target during Gamergate. "Its definitely something that's scary to live through. No
one can dispute that we are all vulnerable. It doesnt matter how high-profile you
are." she says. She felt scared. Scared of the repercussions from just posting her
opinions to a message board. Gamers had always been viewed as an exclusive
group, but any shred of inclusiveness left was quickly taken away by Gamergate.
This quickly reinforced the ideas that games and their communities need to be more
diverse, offer more representation, and be more inclusive. Felicia agrees with a
quote in her book. The idea of representation is important. And I think the world of
gaming needs people from all walks of life to speak up and represent the positive
side of what we love. Because, lets be real: gamings reputation is NOT good in that
area right now."
Felicia Day grew up with a childhood that was thrust upon her. Made to do
unwanted hobbies like dancing, playing the violin, and performing in various shows.
Her family wanted her to fill a certain social role that they thought their little girl
should. She went through the first years of school being afraid of showing her true
colors. She was a gamer, a geek, but nobody could know, it would be improper and
humiliating. Nobody should be lonely or embarrassed for liking something, Felicia
says in her book You're Never Weird on the Internet (almost): A Memoir. Many kids
go through school living a life that isnt theres. A charade encouraged by anxiety
and the fear of being ridiculed for enjoying video games or nerdy activities meant
for lonely little boys. Gender roles and social stigmas are heavily prevalent in our
society, but their effects go relatively unnoticed.
Before she was out of elementary school Felicias parents pulled her from
public education and taught her from home. She and her brother would read books,
solve puzzles, and play online video games while her parents were at work. It wasnt
until she found these imaginary worlds filled with cyber-people who shared similar
interests that she felt truly accepted. She was able to embrace her lifestyle and not

feel any pressure. " A lot of the things I love like math, science-fiction, and geeky
things like video games, I think that if I were in school I would've been dissuaded
from being proud about saying that I love those things because of the way I was
born, I'm a girl." Felicia feels that the way she looks and the way she was born
would have influenced what people expected from her.
Outside of these virtual walls Felicia still grew. She entered college at age 16
and decided to pursue a major in mathematics, inspired by her love for math and
puzzles, despite being pressured by her family and friends not to do so. She went on
to graduate at the age of 19 with a double major in music performance as well as
mathematics. Furthering her strange career she then moved to California, chasing
dreams of becoming a big Hollywood actor. Job after job she was refused. I wasnt
used to being judged on my appearance for the things that people wanted from
me, Felicia tells the host of the Talks at Google video where she was featured in
August of 2015. After many missed opportunities Felicia felt peer pressured and
gave in to depression when she pitched the idea of an online comedy series known
as The Guild to some Hollywood executives, and was quickly shot down. Felicia
mentions during the Talks at Google video that
she found it to be infuriating and demoralizing
and ultimately the message of my book is you
have to change that." So she did.

In 2006 she
created and produced the show herself along with various friends. The Guild was
a purely online endeavor and was heavily backed by the internet and had a huge
following on social media. Felicia quickly turned her video game playing pass time
into a full time job when she created a Premium YouTube Channel in 2012 after the
success of many seasons of The Guild. Felicia received numerous awards for her
show and has become known for her comedic and down-to-earth geeky attitude.
She considers herself to be an avid and attached gamer, many of her experiences
with games influenced the creation of her show.
Geek & Sundry is Felicias company, website, and network of shows that are
created by video game and geek culture lovers such as her own brother and even
Wil Wheaton. The company has made it a goal to be an epicenter of gaming and
lifestyle for pop culture fans with an independent spirit, and they bring together

people from all over the world who love things in counter-culture, as stated on their
website: geekandsundry.com.
Felicia is an example of how someone can push through social stigmas to be
successful. She is an example of a woman who, despite popular opinions, has made
a life around a love for video games. She is a strong figure in a movement to make
the gaming community more inclusive. She aims to reverse negative responses and
inspire companies, CEOs, and gamers to make their interests more available to
anybody who wants to experience them. "Women have been made more prominent
in the media as representing gamers, programmers, and artists, and younger girls
can see gaming as a viable place where they can be included," Felicia commented
in her Refinery29 interview. Media like video games need to be more diverse to not
only cater to a wider audience but to also encourage and represent the gamers that
play them. Her words are an excellent indication of a call for change and that
something needs to be done about the unjust images that past events, people, and
games have chiseled into what it means to be a gamer. It is important that someone
like Felicia, a woman who has felt the conformable impacts of a narrow-minded
industry, continues to lead and advocate that diversity in video games is necessary
to accurately represent the society that buys and plays them. Not just the women,
but anyone brave enough to call them self a gamer.
With the last clicks responding from her keyboard, Felicia finalizes her
response to all of the Gamergate controversy. "I know this entry will probably draw
contempt from people in the Gamer Gate movement. Something to scorn,
something to rile them up against me and everything Ive ever made. Especially,
and most hurtfully, to mock my vulnerability. I just have one thing to say to you who
do that: Im genuinely sorry you are so angry."