Ouch

Introduction
Hellooo. My name is Goldilocks. I am a golf ball and am--you never would have guessed
this--the color gold. Chloe started hitting me in 2008, when she was four years old. She started
playing with her older brother, Cody, six years old, and grandmother, Jackie, no idea how many
years old--they would do everything together.
Jackie was constantly disappearing throughout the summer and one day, Cody bravely
walked up to her and asked, Where are you going?
To the golf course, she replied.
What do you do there?
I play golf.
Can I play golf?
Sure, next time.
Chloe, who had been sitting on the couch, watching her favorite TV show, Go Diego Go,
jumped up and ran over to them. I wanna play golf, too, she exclaimed.
And so, the next day, Jackie went to the sporting goods store and bought two golf bags,
a pink one and an orange one, and signed them up for junior golf at Pelican Lakes Golf Course
in Windsor, Colorado.

Chapter 1. The Pink Bag (2008-2009)

Early in June of 2008, junior golf lessons started. Cody went to one and didnt like it, but
Chloe did and went to all of them. The lessons were on the driving range and after you hit a ball,
you couldnt go get it, so she and the other kids used range balls. Those range balls told me a
couple stories about Chloe learning to play golf.
The first story was when Emily, the junior golf teacher, called Chloe Jumper. Emily
taught all the junior golfers how to hold the golf club, tee us golf balls up, and swing the club.
She also taught them to keep their feet on the ground when hitting the ball, because golfers
have to stand still. Chloe couldnt do that; her right foot always turned up and out, the way
youre supposed to golf. Thats how Chloe got the nickname.
After Emily taught them how to hit golf balls, they had a contest to see who could hit a
ball the longest and straightest. One boy hit the longest, but Chloe hit it the straightest, so she
won. She got a Capri Sun for winning and felt so proud and giddy.

Chapter 2. The Orange Bag (2009-2010)

Halfway through the summer of 2009, Chloe grew too tall for the clubs in the pink bag,
and since Cody wasnt playing anymore, she moved me and my sisters to his orange bag.
Sometimes, we went to Collindale Golf Course in Fort Collins, because it was closer to
home, to practice. One day, when we went to practice at Collindale, Chloe noticed a contraption
sticking out of the ground, and asked Jackie if they could go see what it was. Jackie took her
over there and told her what it was. I couldnt believe it was a golf ball washer! They sat on the
bench and took out my sisters and I, and Chloe washed each of us, and gave us names as she
did so. She washed me first and called me Goldilocks. Then she washed one of my sisters, a
peach-colored ball, and called her Peachie. After Peachie was cleaned, she washed Pinkie, a
pink ball, and Silvie, who was silver. What a day!

One day, after we were named, we were playing at Pelican Lakes, and on the first hole,
Chloe hit me a little sideways, and I ended up in the potentially snake-infested dead grass.
Chloe wanted to look for me, but Jackie told her not to, because of the possibility of the snakes.
Chloe said something along the lines of I have to find Goldilocks! She searched for about ten
minutes until she finally found me. Then I got put in time-out and have been in the golf bag ever
since.

Chapter 3. The Blue Bag (2010-2012)

Once again, halfway through the summer 2010, Chloe had a big growth spurt, and the
clubs in the orange bag were too short, so she moved us to the blue bag. Since I was in time
out, Chloe started playing with my sister, Pinkie. Pinkie sure had some adventures that she told
me about! Heres four that I remember:
One of them was when Chloe got to drive the golf cart. It was so bumpy! According to
the golf course rulebook, she wasnt old enough to drive, so Jackie would drive until they were
hidden from view by the trees. Then, they would switch places and Chloe would drive (shes
driven ever since).
Another time, Pinkie told me about when Chloe got a par on the third hole. A par is the
expected number of times for someone to hit the ball (Ouch!). In golf, a lower score is a better
score. Chloe used to always get way above par. The third hole was a par three. Chloe hit Pinkie
with her driver all the way to the green. Then she putted twice and got a par.
The third one was on the sixth hole, when Jackie laughed at Chloe. The hole was on the
top level of the green and Pinkie was on the lower level. Chloe couldnt hit Pinkie hard enough
to get her onto the upper level of the green. She tried three or four times and Pinkie wouldnt go
over the hill. Jackie couldnt stop laughing while she was encouraging Chloe to hit Pinkie harder.
Finally, Chloe gave up, picked up Pinkie, and said something along the lines of Im never
playing this hole again! And she never did.
The last story happened on hole number nine. The ninth hole was a par three and had a
lake between the tee and the green. You had to hit your ball over the lake to get onto the green
or you lost the ball to the unforgiving water. This was the first and last time Chloe and Jackie
played the ninth hole. Chloe would get tired after the fifth hole and they would leave. This day,
she didnt get tired and asked to play the seventh, eighth, and ninth holes (she still refused to
play the sixth hole). At the ninth hole, Jackie hit her ball into the water. Chloe hit Pinkie over the
lake and onto the green. She putted twice and got a par. She was awesome!

Chapter 4. The Purple Bag (2013-Present)

In 2013, Chloe moved us from Pelican Lakes to the Fort Collins Country Club. In the
middle of the summer, she moved us to a new golf bag, a purple one. Im still in time out, and
Chloe played with Silvie for the summer of 2013. Silvie told me that nothing really exciting
happened that summer. Chloe sprained her ankle in July of 2014. It got worse instead of better,
because Chloe didnt do what the doctor told her to do, so she ended up in a cast and on
crutches. So she didnt get to play with us that year. We just moped in the golf bag.
This year, 2015, was eventful. The first time Chloe and Jackie played, they discovered
the Magic of Hole Number Five. That day, Chloe hit Silvie onto the green very close to the hole.
She wouldve gotten a birdie (one under par) if the horn hadnt blared. The horn meant there

was a lightning storm and told the golfers to get off of the course and get back to the clubhouse.
Jackie told Chloe to get into the golf cart, as she went to grab Silvie. Chloe was surprised and
scared, so Jackie drove, very fast, I might add. They didnt play the rest of the hole or course.
Then, another day on hole five, the golf cart was low on gas and they got stuck. Jackie
called the Pro Shop and someone brought a new cart. They kept playing and on hole six that
same day, Chloe found a Callaway, which is a better brand of ball than my sisters and I. My
sisters and I were excited to finally have a brother.
The third time the curse went into play, Chloe hit Silvie into the dead grass, as she did
with me at Pelican Lakes years ago. She looked and looked for at least fifteen minutes, but
never found her. Afterward, Chloe was so upset that they just went home.
The next time they played, she used the Callaway (she curiously never named him). On
the fifth hole that day, she missed the green and hit the Callaway a long way, over the dead
grass, that she had hit Silvie into, next to the white tee of the next hole. Chloe and Jackie went
to go look for him and a couple of golfers asked if they had lost a ball. Jackie said yes and one
of the golfers pointed to the ball.
The fifth time they played, nothing bad happened. Chloe hit the Callaway onto the green
and two-putted, getting a par. Thank goodness, the curse had ended!

Conclusion
Obviously, golf and us golf balls are a very important part of Chloes life. With each golf
bag, Chloe did either junior golf or had private lessons. With each bag, she got better, hitting the
ball farther and more consistently. And with each bag, she had more of a strive to keep playing
and get better. As her favorite, retired golf ball, I cant wait to see how far Chloe goes in her golf
career.

Memoir
LT: I can write a descriptive memoir!

CRITERI
A

ADVANCED 4

PROFICIENT 3

PARTIALLY
PROFICIENT
2
I can
write about
myself using
Th
oughts
and
feelings
Di
alogue
H
as some
element
s of my
personal
ity

INSUFFICIENT
EVIDENCE - 1

About
me

I can
write about
myself using
Co
nvincing
thoughts
and
feelings
Aut
hentic
dialogue
Sh
aring
many
aspects
of my
personali
ty

I can
write about
myself using
Th
oughts
and
feelings
Dia
logue
Sh
ows my
personali
ty

Use in
my
memoir
a
proble
m or
conflict
with a
climax/
high
point in
the
story
that
connect
s to the
so
what
A
working
plan/or
ganized
piece of
writing.
Your
story

I can
tell about a
problem that
occurred and
needs a
solution
provide a high
point in my
story
write a strong
conclusion that
wraps up the
plot and
connects to the
so what

I can
tell about a
problem or
event
provide a
high point in
my story
write a
conclusion that
wraps up the
plot

I can
tell about an
incident in my
life, but it
doesnt really
tell a story so
my reader
does not care
about it
write a
conclusion

I can
write just the
facts

I can
focus my
ideas so that
my main idea is
interesting and
clear
create a flow
in my story that

I can
write about
ideas that are
interesting
create a story
that has a clear
beginning,
middle and

I can
put my ideas
in writing but
they are not
connected. It
is difficult for
my reader to
understand

I can
Brainstorm
many ideas, but
I havent figure
out a central
topic or theme
yet
Have ideas in

I can
write about
myself, but I
dont share
much about
myself.
use
dialogue,
but
conversati
on is not
realistic
my
personalit
y doesnt
come
through

needs
to have
a so
what.

carries my
reader along
include a
larger purpose
to my writing.
My so what is
easily to
discern

end.
include a
larger purpose,
although my so
what may be
hard to figure
out

what is going
on in the story
write a story
but there is no
larger purpose

Conven
tions

I can
Edit my
writing so that
there are ZERO
errors in
grammar,
punctuation,
capitalization,
and spelling
Keep
consistence
verb tense
throughout
Punctuate my
dialogue
correctly

I can
Edit my
writing so that
there are
THREE OR LESS
errors in
grammar,
capitalization,
punctuation,
and spelling

I can
Edit my
writing, but I
am still
making some
consistent
errors in
capitalization,
spelling,
grammar,
punctuation
that have a
negative
impact on the
overall quality
of writing

In-Class
Work
Time

I can
Utilize my
time wisely in
order to
produce an
excellent paper
Refrain from
distracting my
friends and
peers
Ask questions
when I need
help

I can
Usually use
my time
positively in
order to
produce a well
written paper
Usually
refrain from
distracting my
friends and
peers
Usually ask
questions if I
need help

I can
Sometimes
use my time in
a positive way
in order to
produce a
finished paper
Sometimes
refrain from
distracting my
friends and
peers, but I/we
are often off
task
Sometimes
ask questions
if I need help

Final Paper Grade: 4

my head, but
Im having a
hard time
getting them on
the paper
Use some
details, but I
may be
repeating or
listing them.
I can
Edit my
writing, but my
piece is difficult
to understand
due to
consistent
errors in
capitalization,
grammar,
spelling, and
punctuation

I can
Occasionally
use my time in
a positive way
to work on my
paper, but I am
usually off task
and lack focus
Occasionally
refrain from
distracting my
friends and
peers, but more
often than not,
we are not using
our time wisely
Occasionally
ask questions if
I need help

Chloe,
This a fabulous paper! I am so impressed and would like to use it as an
exemplar for future classes. You used dialogue extremely well, I couldnt find
any errors that needed correcting, and you wrote in such a way that I wanted
to know more! I love hearing about your golf journey and am very sad you
couldnt find Silvie! Thank you for a fun read!