Third Culture Kids

Children raised between worlds

Terminologies for
TCKs
a person who has spent a significant part of his or her developmental
years outside the parents culture. The TCK builds relationships to all of
the cultures, while not having full ownership in any. Although elements
from each culture are assimilated into the TCKs life experience, the
sense of belonging is in relationship to others of similar background.
(David Pollock)
Global nomads
Cross Cultural Kids (CCKs), refers to children who have lived or
meaningfully interacted with two or more cultural environments for a
significant period of time during developmental years.
CCK is a much more inclusive concept. Includes traditional TCKs,
bi/multi-cultural and/or bi/multiracial children, children of
immigrants, children of refugees, children of minorities, international
adoptees, domestic TCKs and educational CCKs.

A group that hasnt

received much research
attention yet are the
children of international
educators

Metaphors to understand
the CCK/TCK experience
The cultural chameleons due to their intercultural, linguistic,

observation and adaptation skills. May try to fit in everywhere and

hide their background
The screamer who shouts and demonstrates that they are different
The wallflower who withdraws and observes from the outside, not
investing efforts to become part of the group.
An iceberg - what is hidden is much larger than what is seen on the
surface
A phoenix to describe process of establishing their identity
through the search for their own truth.

TCKs in their own words

I am
a confusion of cultures.
Uniquely me.
I think this is good
because I can
understand
the traveller, sojourner, foreigner,
the homesickness
that comes.
I think this is also bad
because I cannot
be understood
by the person who has sown and grown in one place.
They know not

TCK developmental
influences

Many influences go into a persons development not all TCKs develop

the same.
What are some influences you can identify?
The employing sponsor, the familys size, relationships, and cultures, the
number of countries lived in and for how long, the ages at which the
international sojourn takes place, the knowledge of and participation in
both the visited and passport culture, the type of schooling, and
where and how one lives in the visited culture all have an influence.

Benefits of being raised

a TCK
The book "Raising Global Nomads" by Robin Pascoe describes some of the
strengths of TCAs (adults who are grown-up TCKs):
Alert, intelligent and geographically aware
Mature, sensitive, skilled at listening
Likely to exhibit tolerance and cross cultural understanding
Flexible and open to change
High achieving
Drawn to careers associated with service to the community or world
Many parents note that, even while still young, their TCK children are
more confident, have strong multilingual skills, are more accepting of
differences in others, and tend to be more aware of the global
environment.

TCK Challenges

Identity Formation

This is a basic psychological task answering the question Who am I?

This task may be a TCKs biggest challenge, as they have so many
different influences to answer the question

Identity Formation
Some options that TCKs choose as their form of identity:
One is the culture that they currently live in.
The second is the "passport culture", which is the parents' country.
The third option is that they will choose NOT to identify themselves with
any culture, but would choose a common activity/hobby/talent, and that
would be the child's identity.
Another option is for the child to always say, "I'm OTHER." This child
knows enough about each culture that he would choose, on purpose, to
dress or behave differently enough to not fit in. Because he feels different
on the inside no matter what his location, he chooses to let everyone
know it by appearance and behaviour.

There was no funeral.

No flowers.
No ceremony.
No one had died.
No weeping or wailing.
Just in my heart.
I cant . . .
But I did anyway,
and nobody knew I couldnt.
I dont want to . . .
But nobody else said they didnt.
So I put down my panic
and picked up my luggage
and got on the plane.
There was no funeral.

Grief and Loss

Mock Funeral by Alex Graham James

Grief and Loss

Unresolved grief is often one of the major challenges of the TCK

experience.
David Pollock has found that most TCKs go through more grief
experiences by the time they are 20 than monocultural individuals do in
a lifetime.
Typical reactions of unresolved grief include denial, anger, bargaining,
sadness/depression, and acceptance, but not always in a linear or even
obvious fashion.
Withdrawal physical and emotional withdrawal is a way some TCKs
and TCAs try to avoid feeling the pain of their anger or sadness
Van Reken found that these signs of unresolved grief were often shown
later in life after high school and university.

Re-entry into the home

culture

A major difference between

children and adults when
repatriating is whether they
look backwards or forwards.
Most teenagers returning to their
passport home do not feel they fit
in.
TCKs have been shown to have
more in common with other TCKs,
regardless of their respective
passport countries.
TCKs often are cultural outsiders in
their own passport country.

Stability in a life without

roots

Build a strong foundation the family unit is often the most stable
part of a TCKs life. Supportive parental relationships, respect and
commitment are vital. This is both parent-to-parent and parent-to-child
Perception of parents work TCKs who understand and value
what their parents do are more willing to work through the challenges
than those who dont.
Parents attitude toward the job, the host country and culture, and
the sincerity of the beliefs that motivated them to go abroad in the first
place. The more positive parent attitudes are, the easier it is for a TCK to
adjust to their setting
Core beliefs and values maintaining consistent, identifiable, core
beliefs and values is the key to true stability throughout life.

Planning entries and

exits
Pollock and Van Reken, in their book Third Culture Kids: The Experience
of Growing up Among Worlds, talk about what is needed for a healthy
closure when it comes to saying goodbyes.
Think of saying goodbye as building a RAFT:
o
o
o
o

Reconciliation
Affirmation
Farewells
Think Destination

Planning entries and

exits

Reconciliation involves the need to forgive and the need to be

forgiven. This will allow us to reduce the heavy mental baggage of
unresolved problems that will stay with us. How you resolve a
misunderstanding or problem depends on what culture you are in.
Affirmation involves acknowledging those we are leaving behind by
letting them know we appreciate them.
Farewells involves saying good-bye to people, things, places, pets and
whatever you have to leave. Make time to do so.
Thinking destination: Think about where you are going at the same
time you are saying goodbye. Ask yourself what are the pros and cons
about saying goodbye and moving to your new home.

Will TCKs always be

different?

Third culture kids are the prototype citizen of the future

(Ted Ward, sociologist at Michigan State University, 1984)

TCKs experience will be the new normal

Thank you and enjoy the journey!