Danci

Tatton
Comm 2150-07
Shirene McKay
April 22,1916

Cultural Change Final Report

Overview
My final paper will include my competency area, my thoughts on why I chose what I
did, and my experiences that helped me become more aware of why I act the way I
do in social situations. Also I will include a reflection of what I learned and how it
has affected me.

Competency Area
Tolerance of Ambiguity: This dimension measures the extent to which I am able to
manage ambiguity as it relates to new and complex situations where there are not
necessarily clear answers about what is going on or how things should be done
{McKay 25).

I decided to do my Cultural Change Paper on Tolerance of Ambiguity. After I took
the Global Competencies Inventory test I realized that this was something that I
needed to improve on in my social life and my soon to be professional life. I am
getting ready to enter into the field of Interpreting for the Deaf. I figured
this will only help me be a better person. Thats what life is all about right?
Becoming a better individual? I have had some experiences that led me to where I
am now. I am an active LDS member. I grew up in the church. I have had many
callings where I work with other members of my faith. I have developed a habit of
not contributing to the conversations, because I feel there are many high strung
people that have a certain way they do things and it does not matter what I say or
do, I am wrong. So I have developed a bad habit of just letting the high strung
person lead the meeting. Which causes me to misunderstand what is going on
because I am not asking clarification on some aspects of the activities that I am
involved in.

I also get frustrated when we talk about the activity when its finished. The
leaders will ask What can we change? or How can we improve? My answers
would be sarcastic The whole thing. I dont really say that but that is what Im
thinking. Instead of saying that, I just sit quietly and let everyone else do the talking.
Those moments would be my opportunity to speak up. But, I dont. In the book it
states There is often a great deal of ambiguity in intercultural conflicts. We may be
unsure of how to handle the conflict or of whether the conflict is seen in the same
way by the other person. And the other person may not even think there is a
conflict (Martin and Nakayama 437). After reading that about ambiguity I thought
that is why the other leaders think that everything is okay. I am not speaking up. I
am not contributing to the meeting. If I want something to change I need to be apart
of that change. They think I am fine with it when Im not so this causes hurt feelings
with me and causes confusion in the relationships.





Goal: Ambiguity means unclear messages or meanings. This can go both ways. The
message going out can be unclear and the message being received can also be
unclear. This can cause confusion within the cultural, because the correct message is
not being conveyed. My goal is to speak up in my planning meetings when decisions
are being made especially when Im not sure about what is being said or dont like
what is being said. Also When I communicate with my family. The conversation can
become misunderstood due to lack of information or lack of attention. This can
cause some ambiguity in our family. I want to change this so that there is no
contention within our family.


Chapter #8 Understanding Intercultural Transitions

Tactic #8: As I communicate, I need to make sure I am not judging others as they
communicate with me. They may have something important to say but are being shy
about it. The quote I found was, In any interaction, it is important not only to
predict how someone will behave but also to explain why the person behaves in a
particular way (Martin and Nakayama 332).

My youth group was ready to go on this outing that we had planned earlier that
month. There was a Leader that was giving instructions to the group. He was not
very clear. I spoke up. I was able to get better directions on where we were going.
Knowing that the group was going to feel lost and frustrated I decided to speak up
and get clarification. That experience reminded me of the quote in the book it stated,
In any interaction, it is important not only to predict how someone will behave but
also to explain why the person behaves in a particular way (Martin and Nakayama
332).

Another experience I had was with my mother. We were having a girls night out
with my sisters. When we get together we all talk very rapidly. There was a point in
the conversation that was discussed where we were to go to Hobby Lobby. I did not
want to go. I should have paid closer attention to when this event was being talked
about. This caused me to be very frustrated. Earlier in the conversation I told my
family about all the homework I had waiting for me at home. I feel that they should
have predicted my behavior when suggesting that we go to another store. I felt like
the bad guy telling them that I didnt not hear them, and could not go with them.

Tactic Implementation: I feel that predicting behavior can go both ways. I need to
continue to be aware of how I come across when receiving clarification on certain
matters. I also can be more aware of others and how maybe they feel the same way.
If I see the frustration in their faces I can certaintly speak up for them or help them
not feel so frustrated. The issues with my family, that is one that I dont know if it

will ever change. Its been that way my whole life. I tried talking to them about the
situation. It was a waist of time. They did not see my side of the story at all.

Tactic Recommendations: Now with being aware of how others can feel in a
situation or how I can sometimes feel I think that I will continue with my course of
action. I like that I can predict someones behavior. One excellent aspect of Sign
Language is we are being taught to read body language. So this course of action will
help me as I become an Interpreter. Sometimes when a person is signing to a Deaf
individual they need to be able to explain through sign why someone is behaving in
a certain way. The Deaf Culture has different ways they express themselves. Because
of that I have to predict what is going to happen. This will only make me a better
Interpreter.


Chapter #9 Popular Culture and Intercultural Communication

Tactic 9: Dont be afraid of others opinions. Speak up and express yours with
confidence. You dont have a problem with this anywhere else. Maybe something
might be considered the Norm it does not mean that I have to agree with it. The
quote I found was, It is difficult to avoid popular culture. Not only is it ubiquitous
but it also serves an important social function (Martin and Nakayama 362).

The experience I had with Popular Culture was when I was with a group of friends
and we were talking about music. They were so excited to talk about this group that
they all have listened to. I had no idea what they were talking about. Instead of just
sitting there, agreeing with what they were saying I said. I have no idea who that is.
When they clarified that this particular group was a gospel singing group I told
them, in a polite manner, that I dont listen to gospel groups. I love Rock and Roll.
They were a little surprised by my reaction.

I was asked to speak to a group of ladies at an upcoming activity. I was raised to
always say yes and to do it with a good attitude. This I feel ties into Popular
Culture because its what expected in my faith. I did not want to say yes, all I could
think about was a way out. I told her I would have to think about it. I called her back
and asked questions. I then realized that I could do this. I liked the topic. So I agreed.
I did it because I wanted to. Not because it was expected.

Tactic Implementation: Popular Culture is one that I was very aware of at an early
age. I always went against the grain. I didnt not like to be part of what everyone else
liked. Today I still fell that I am that way with certain aspects of our society. As I
mentioned above I really enjoy Rock music. I felt that I was able to speak up and
share my thoughts on why I like it. I know that I was viewed differently. I didnt care.
I enjoy what I enjoy. I feel that I could be left out of conversations about music in the
future. That could be a problem. I do think I could help them understand why I like
what I do.



Tactic Recommendations: I will continue to speak up. I dont want others to just
assume that I go with the Norm. I think society molds people to think that way. I
will be vocal about things that I like. However I know what I want and what I like,
but I will not be disrespectful of others likes and dislikes.


Chapter #10 Culture, Communication, and Intercultural Relationships

Tactic #10: I will learn to speak in a manner that will be understood by others. I will
do this as I continue to interact with my church group and communicate with my
family. The quote I found to go with this is from the book it states, We often learn
how to do new things in intercultural relationships. Through intercultural
relationships, newcomers to a society can acquire important skills; all of these
potential benefits can lead to a sense of interconnectedness with others and can
establish a lifelong pattern of communication across differences. We also hope that
it helps us become better intercultural communicators (Martin and Nakayama
392).

I had an experience where I needed a paper printed out. I do not have a printer at
home. I talked to my husband on the phone. He said to email it to him and he would
print it out. We continued the conversation with some details about an up coming
trip that we are planning. When the conversation ended I emailed my husband the
paper to be printed off and the details of the trip. I put in the subject of the email.
Trip and paper I thought he would understand what that meant. Nope! When I
asked him about it when he arrived home he said, I never saw that email with your
school paper come through. He thought the email was only our itinerary of our trip.
He was expecting 2 different emails.

I needed my husband to take my son to a neighbors house to order a birthday cake
(This lady sells birthday cakes to neighbors to earn a little money, they are out of
this world. Its so worth it) I had the appointment set up but had double booked
myself for that night. I asked him to go instead of me. He told me No, I am so tired
tonight, can you just reschedule please? I said no. Just go. When I came home from
my other engagement I asked what they ordered. My husband said, I told you I
didn't want to go I should have been more understanding of his long day. I was
forgiving to him because it was easy just to call her and reschedule.

Tactic Implementation: When it comes to blending two cultures together for
instance, in a marriage, there needs to be understanding and forgiveness, when
making mistakes. This can cause hurt feeling in the marriage. When I expect
something from my husband and he is honest with me, I need to be willing to work
with him and come to a compromise and not be the problem. The understanding can
go both ways. If we are honest with our feelings with each other then we can create
a happy environment in our home.


Tactic Recommendations: I will continue with my course of action. I see how my
friends treat their husbands. I see that someone is the controlling one. I see how this
can hurt the relationship. I do not want that in my relationship with anyone
especially my husband. I will continue to take what he has to offer and blend it with
how I do things. Talking with him about this helps him to also understand that he
needs to do the same for me. It just works better.

Chapter #11 Intercultural Communication Applications

Tactic #11: As the end of the semester is coming to a close, I will be aware of
how I talk to others and my expectations. I have a great deal of stress I am dealing
with and I would hate for someone to misunderstand me. I will slow down and think
through how to communicate with my husband and kids as well as in my church
group I will communicate with them so there is no misunderstanding.
In the book it states, There is often a great deal of ambiguity in intercultural
conflicts. We may be unsure of how to handle the conflict or of whether the conflict
is seen in the same way by the other person. And the other person may not even
think there is a conflict (Martin and Nakayama 437).

A recent meeting we were organizing the remaining birthday gifts we give out to
each of our girls in our church. I told them to separate each necklace and put them in
a small bag, then put all the bags in a box or basket. A few days later when it came
time to hand out the birthday gifts I noticed that the necklaces were still tangled
together and had not been separated. Very casually I asked a leader sitting next to
me why they were still tangled and not organized. I was just curious. She shyly said
well you came across kind of rude and I dont think she completely understood you.
I felt so bad. I started to think of what the situation was and why my statement
would have offended her. I could not come up with any conclusion. When the
meeting ended I pulled her aside and she would not answer my question. I then just
decided to tell her that I was a very direct person and if I offended her I was sorry.
Also I told her why my idea was good. I just wanted to help her feel more organized.
She accepted my apology and we have moved on from that.

I had an experience this week with a woman who is the secretary for the primary in
my church. The primary is the organization for the kids ages 3 to 11. The
Presidency of the Primary wanted to come over and visit my son who just turned 8.
He is ready to be baptized into our church and that is why they wanted to come
over. She said, Are you ignoring my text messages? I just looked at her and wanted
to punch her in the throat. That was rude I thought. So I told her I am now My
husband was there and said in his calming voice Why? Are you trying to get a hold
of her for something? She then explains the purpose of the text message. I calmed
down. I hate it when someone accuses me of Avoiding them I am very busy. I will
answer my texts when I have time. I always tell people if its important, call me and
leave a message. Or be patient with my response to any text you may send me. She


didnt realize that I was in a bad mood and didnt realize her approach was
aggravating to me. I was able to work out a time for the visit and then told her the
reason I responded the way I did and she apologized for the sarcastic approach.


Tactic Implementation: With the two experiences that I have had with this chapter
I can see that I need to be clear in my messages but pay attention to the person Im
talking to. I see that some people are very sensitive to others approach. I had the
experience of being on both sides of things. The first one was me being upfront with
what I wanted and expected, then someone got offended by me. The next was me
being in a bad mood and someone approached me and made me mad. It does go
both ways. However, I can change the way I come across to others by paying better
attention to them. I only can control my feelings when others are communicating
with me. If I am in a bad mood I need to be aware of that and not let it affect the
situation.

Tactic Recommendations: I am aware of how I am when I am in a bad mood. My
husband laughs at me. He tells me he wishes he had a microphone in my head so he
can hear all my thoughts that run through my head when I am in a bad mood. So
knowing how I come across when I am mad can be hard on others. I will change this
behavior. I will also pay attention to how I come across to others when I am being
assertive with my decisions. The last thing I want to do is hurt someone through my
actions.

Reflection:
Q: How does this assignment illustrate the growth/change/progress you have had
in this class?

A: I didnt even know there was such a thing as Ambiguity. I didnt even know how
to say it at first. As I studied the meaning of the word, I realized that I have that
problem. I need to speak up more in social situations to understand the meaning of
what we were doing or talking about. I found a website that had a compilation of
quotes one of my favorites that I feel applies states, The most important thing in
communication is hearing what isnt said (Drucker). Body language is just as
important as how we use words. The family I grew up with is a big factor in why I
have communication problems. My mom does a lot of implying and she Assumes
so much. My communication with her has always been bad. I think that is part of the
problem I have with her. I wish I could say that through this class its gotten better
with her but it hasn't. It needs to go both ways.

The communication within my immediate family has changed. My husband and I
have a lot more to talk about now. We have learned from each other about how we
communicate, whether its through words or through body language. We need to be
sensitive to all the factors.




Q: How can you apply what youve learned in this class to other classes, to the
workplace, and/or other areas of your life?

A: I have grown in my knowledge of communication. I have learned what has caused
conflicts with how I communicate as well as how others communicate with me. I can
implement these tactics, and new knowledge in my family as my husband and I raise
our children. They can benefit from this as well as I can. Also I can implement this
new found knowledge in the work place as I continue to go to school I will be able to
practice these and hopefully the good ones will become a habit. Then when I start to
work I will be able to feel successful in what I am doing.





Work Cited
Martin, Judith N. and Thomas K. Nakayama. Intercultural Communication in Contexts.

6th Ed. Boston, MA: McGrawHill, 2013.

McKay, Shirene. Intercultural Communication Learning Packet. Salt Lake City, Ut: Salt
Lake Community College, 2015.

"The Heart of Innovation: 24 Awesome Quotes on Good Communication." The Heart of
Innovation: 24 Awesome Quotes on Good Communication. 27 Dec. 2010. Web.
21 Apr. 2016.