THE TRIALS OF A COMMON PLEAS JUDGE

THE HONORABLE MARK I. BERNSTEIN

PHILADELPHIA, PENNSYLVANIA 2016

CHAPTER TWO

AND TO EVERYONES SURPRISE

WHAT CONFUSION SHE must have experienced

when I asked her to identify herself and explain why she
was in my office. She responded with the exact same
questions of me. I told her I was Judge Bernstein and
room 530 City Hall has been my office for over five
years. Since I was obviously discomforted by the
conversation, Jenny, for that was the young ladys
name, became very solicitous and offered me a seat on
plush benches in the chambers anteroom to regain my
composure while she would fetch Judge Bachmann,
who was fortuitously still in his office. During the
moments it took for Judge Bachmann to appear, I
noticed that while the physical structure of the room
was exactly as I had left it a few hours before, all the
computers had been removed, and my pictures and

THE TRIALS OF A COMMON PLEAS JUDGE

decorations had been replaced by much more expensive

original lithographs, and an exquisite tapestry had been
hung from the ceiling, which totally transformed the
rectangular feel of the entire space. I had only begun to
wonder whether I had somehow mistakenly gone to the
third floor and to try to imagine which of our Judges
had the resources and taste to so beautifully decorate
such a chambers when Judge Bachmann appeared and
asked if he could help me.
I assured him that I hoped he could begin by
explaining what had happened to and so dramatically
transformed my office so quickly. He was completely
taken back by the question and asked if I had identified
myself as Judge Bernstein. I assured him that I was
Judge Bernstein having been duly appointed and elected
and in fact had served continuously, and, I might add,
honorably, for over four years. Although apparently
confused by my response, he ushered me into my very
own office, which to my further surprise had been
similarly redecorated in Victorian elegance. He invited
me to sit down on the couch so that we could get to the
bottom of this very peculiar situation, which equally
intrigued us both.
I found Judge Bachmann to be classically
educated and most engaging. He inquired as to whether
I knew that I was in Philadelphia, Pennsylvania, and
asked for the history of how I became a Judge.
Thinking back to this discussion I am sure that he
believed I was one of those poor unfortunates whose
delusional world placed himself into an exalted role that
was fully believed to be true but had of course no

THE TRIALS OF A COMMON PLEAS JUDGE

existence beyond the four corners of a disturbed mind.

However, being of a mind ready to accept all evidence
before judiciously reaching any conclusion, Judge
Bachmann kindly allowed me to fully explain. My
detailed explanation of how Governor Casey had
empanelled lawyers across the state to present to him
the most qualified individuals for appointment to a
judiciary decimated by corruption intrigued him rather
than convincing him that the medical authorities had to
be called. I apparently also convinced him that,
whatever my delusions, the depth of my knowledge and
acuity of judicial thought demonstrated that something
truly unusual had indeed occurred.
I explained that I had practiced law in
Philadelphia with offices at 16th and Walnut for over a
decade doing primarily civil litigation and some
criminal defense until the city experienced a
horrendous situation where 16 judges had been thrown
off the bench for taking the petty sum of $300 in
gratuities from a labor union, and three or four had
actually gone to jail because the gratuities could be
connected to actual judicial decisions. In response the
Governor had created merit selection panels which
had recommended me among many others to
judgeships, and that after confirmation by the Senate I
took the bench on April 7th and was elected for a full
ten year term the following November. I went on to
explain that for three years I had presided over
hundreds of criminal cases, many of which were bench
trials, until I had most recently been moved to the
courts civil division and was at that very time presiding

THE TRIALS OF A COMMON PLEAS JUDGE

in Courtroom 443 when I had left City Hall because of

the syncopatic episode that I have previously described.
He stopped me at this point and said that I must be
mistaken because I could not have been confirmed in
April since the legislature, of which he had been a
member for over a decade, routinely and uniformly
meets only January to March before breaking for the
summer. My quizzical look and taken aback demeanor
undoubtedly conveyed such sense of shock that my
listener thought perhaps he had misheard. He again
asked when I had taken the bench, to which I replied
with precision that I had been sworn in by the President
Judge Bradley in room 578 City Hall on April 7, 1987,
at 2:00 p.m.
Imagine the shock I saw in Judge Bachmanns face
as he slowly realized that I was fully in control of all my
senses and not in any respect suffering any delusions.
He went to his desk, picked up the evening Bulletin,
and showed me the date on the masthead, which read
July 3, 1913. I told him that of course this was
impossible and the paper obviously a replica. But after
some significant toing and froing we simultaneously
came to the inevitable conclusion that somehow after
my fall from my chair I had awakened 80 years earlier.
Judge Bachmann suggested that while we figured
out what was happening, since I was a fully
commissioned judge I should be treated to all the
emoluments of my office (which I must say I learned
were significantly greater in 1913 than 1993) and most
graciously offered that I was more than welcome to stay

THE TRIALS OF A COMMON PLEAS JUDGE

with him at his house in the Fairmount suburb of town

until a return to my proper era could be arranged.
He graciously asked if I would wait so he could
summon his President Judge, the Mayor, and the City
Fathers to meet me. Believing that I needed time alone
to sort out the amazing transformation I found myself
in, I agreed but asked for something to drink while he
was away. Although not my usual daytime habit I
readily accepted the brandy he offered. He clearly had
told his secretary Jennie ODonnell to check on me
frequently, which she did with countless diplomatic
excuses or offers of things she could provide. While
alone in what had been my former office, or more
precisely subsequently my previous office, I wondered
in disbelief at the oddity of the situation. Yet in
examining the appurtenances and appearances of the
chambersthe pens, the paper, the casebooks, the
newspaper articles, the pleadings, and the absence of
any modern appliances except for the antique
telephoneI became convinced that this was no
Potemkin village. Indeed the appellate court reports,
sitting on my shelves precisely as they had in 1993 when
it had last been my office, ended with the July, 1913,
decisions! Apparently I was not dreaming or under any
delusion but had in fact performed a reverse Rip Van
Winkle. Although this defied all scientific possibility I
was forced to admit that the reality was I was in the
different world of a time long passed and that until I
found a way to restore myself I could only conduct
myself in the manner my former law partner would

THE TRIALS OF A COMMON PLEAS JUDGE

frequently advise: when life hands you a lemon make

lemonade.
I resolved to learn as much as I possibly could
about 1913 and chuckled to myself as I unsuccessfully
tried to recall for investment purposes when Xerox and
IBM were incorporated and what industries were about
to boom when World War would break out some few
years hence. Unfortunately, these historical facts that
suddenly became so important had never seemed
worthy of note at any earlier time in my life, and except
for looking for the invention of the commercial airline I
found I had little investment knowledge of any use,
even with this potential opportunity for easy riches. (I
did think to note that if I was still in this predicament a
decade later I must sell all my stocks before the great
depression of 1927 or was it 1926?)
WATCH FOR CHAPTER THREE
JUNE 1, 2016