Emily Adams

Psychology 673AIndividual Practicum

Laurie Gallagher, MFT
Individual Counseling Reflection
Throughout the past four months of counseling, I have met with a total
of 11 clients facing a variety of issues. While talking with them and hearing
their stories, I felt so proud of them to have sought counseling in a proactive
attempt to change their lives. Through these interactions, I learned a great
deal from my experiences with counter-transference, fearing confrontation,
and recognizing trauma.
At the beginning of this semester, I was very nervous as I adjusted to
my counseling role. While in these anxious states, I usually appreciate
reassurance through positive interactions with others to put me more at
ease. However, the five sessions between a particular client and me just
added to my anxiety and I sincerely questioned my abilities.
This client displayed multiple odd behaviors to which I interpreted to
be small challenges of my position. For example, asking if she may listen to
music through headphones during our session, regularly asking my
philosophical opinions, frequent, long pauses in the middle of a sentence, or
after I pose a question (usually staring at me during these pauses), and short
bursts of laughter that came out of nowhere, but had no explanation when
queried. In addition, when I inquired or stated with a feeling response, she
often interrupted. This reaction led me to believe my response or question
was incorrect or poorly timed. I began to dread our sessions, and found

myself avoiding any new clients for fear they would behave the way she did.
I thought they were each going to challenge my position and not be
responsive to me.
Over time and with a lot of constructive feedback from my professor, I
realized her behavior was most likely a result of psychological issues she had
developed from an early age. I could then recognize that these strange
interactions werent specific to me, but was probably how she acts around
others in her life as well. I kept these revelations in mind during our last two
sessions which proved to be much less anxiety provoking than the previous
three. As soon as I excluded myself from the equation, I was able to focus on
the difficulties she had connecting with other people. I no longer interpreted
her behaviors as personal attacks and could empathize more with her
situation. I am now more aware that everyone has his or her own issues that
may never involve me. By keeping this in mind, I can better attempt to
understand the individuals story as I continue counseling.
There was a client I saw for seven sessions who perhaps posed the
most pressing issue of all my clients; she had a serious drinking problem at
the age of 20. She had a traumatic childhood, and our first session was the
first time she had sought therapy. She never cancelled or rescheduled, and
each day she came with a big smile on her face. Some days she would be
happy to report she had control of her drinking while most other days she
acknowledged it was a constant struggle. She gradually grew more

disappointed in herself for not achieving her goals. I was very nervous to
assertively connect the drinking with her traumatic past. I understood this to
be a confrontation. I was afraid of being wrong and she would get defensive,
or being right and she would get defensive.
It was our fourth session when she admitted she had a problem, and
shared a painful memory from her childhood. I acknowledged she had
experienced trauma that she carried around with her, and explained that the
drinking had helped her cope for the past six years. I told her it was time to
start creating new ways to process this trauma and the emotions
surrounding it. When I said this I was anxious but also very concerned. She
immediately started crying from happiness that she was able to tell someone
her story and was so hopeful for her future possibilities once she no longer
has this problem.
I learned that if my motivation is to help someone, I need to provide all
the insight I can. I previously viewed this action as confrontation. This
clients reaction showed me that my insight wont always be met with
opposition, but instead with agreement and gratitude. It was this very same
client with the drinking problem who also taught me about the aftermath of
trauma.
The book I read for class was called, Treating the Aftermath of Sexual
Abuse: A Handbook for Working with Children in Care. Although this client
did not share any sexual abuse experiences, she displayed many enduring

symptoms this book stated. This helped me to realize the varying lasting
effects of trauma. This book has taught me that any traumatic event will
likely have developmental impacts. As I counsel children in schools, the
earlier I help identify the trauma and help them to process it, the sooner they
will recover. The actual event does not necessarily reflect the level of
trauma the child or adult walks away with. It is solely determined by the
individuals understanding of the event and the level of threat they felt for
themselves or for another.
Another important thing to keep in mind when counseling individuals
who have experienced trauma is the environmental and emotional triggers
that may emerge. Certain smells, physical contact, or even phrases can
unlock the painful memory leading the person to believe they are
experiencing the event all over again. While meeting with children,
teenagers, or adults who display symptoms from trauma of any kind, I will try
to minimize the risk of presenting any triggers. In addition, if a client I am
seeing shows indication of re-experiencing the abuse in my presence, I can
better identify the trigger in the environment and remove it.
I am very grateful for all of the experiences this semester has provided
me. I will build on these lessons as I continue to establish my role as
counselor. I now have a better understanding of the issues others carry with
them, and to avoid internalizing negative or anxiety-provoking interactions
as it may not have anything to do with me. Moreover, I am exponentially

farther on my path to being assertive without overly concerning myself with

the clients reaction. Finally, I have broadened my awareness of the affects
of traumatic events and the enduring symptoms they cause. Even though I
began this semester uncertain in the counseling role, once I realized there
were people who genuinely wanted to change their stories, I felt very
encouraged to help them as best I could.