Tran1

Tammy Tran
Mrs. Housepian/Mr. Conner
English 1H; Period 6
6 May 2016
Operation: Spying with Technology is a No Go
At the end of the day, the most overwhelming key to a child's success is the positive
involvement of parents (Jane D. Hull). According to Jane D. Hull, parents who are involved in
their children's life are successful. But it does not mean that parents need to be over involved to
the point where they are controlling their childs every move. Todays generation of teenagers are
become more tech savvy, therefore parents must also familiarize themselves with technology.
Technology can be useful at times, but it can also be harmful. Some parents might believe that it
is a good idea to use technology for monitoring their teenager, however it can restrict their ability
to be independent, prevent them from developing life skills, and lessen the bond between the
teen and the parent.
Parents should not use technology to monitor teens because it restricts their ability to be
independent. However, in the article Undercover Parent, Harlan Coben reports what teens may
be doing on the internet: yet when it comes to chatting with pedophiles or watching beheadings
or gambling away their entire life savings, then their children deserve independence? (Coben 5).
According to Coben, teens can be chatting with strangers and gambling away all of their savings.
Teens need to be monitored to prevent them from encountering dangers within the internet.
Although there are dangers on the internet, teens should be independent. The Meitivs, parents
from the article Parents Investigated by Donna St. George, believe in free range parenting and
how children need to have self-reliance: with the idea that children learn self-reliance by being
allowed to progressively test limits, make choices and venture out in the world to learn

Tran2

responsibility, to experience the world, to gain confidence and competency (George). Teens
should be able to venture out in the world and be independent. When the parent is excessively
watching and controlling the teens life, it restricts them from learning how to be responsible in
tough situations. Teens need to be able to be independent, therefore parents should not
excessively monitor teenagers. This will allow teens to explore the world, learn responsibility
and be more confident in themselves.
Moreover, when parents use technology to spy on teens, it can prevent them from
developing necessary life skills. MITs Sherry Turkle, from the article Big Brother meets Big
Mother, explains the downside of tethered adolescents: "There's always a parent on speed
dial We may be protecting them right out of the ability to make their own decisions. Including
their own mistakes (Goodman). Teens should be able to make their own decisions and mistakes
without having a parent breathing down their necks. Learning from mistakes is a necessary skill
in life because it makes the person realize that what they have done is wrong. This will lead them
to avoid that same mistake and go down the right path. Furthermore, in the article What is
Helicopter Parenting?, Kate Bayless, the author, mentions examples of physical tasks children
are able to do: Parents who always tie shoes, clear plates, pack lunches, launder clothes, and
monitor school progress, even after children are mentally and physically capable of doing the
task, prevent their children from mastering these skill themselves (Bayless). Parents who still
does simple tasks for the children, even though they are capable of doing it themselves, are
hindering their children from developing necessary skills. Children and teens need to master the
skills that are needed for life, so that when they become older they are independent. Teenagers
and children are expected to expand their knowledge of basic life skills as they grow, but using
technology to spy can hinder them from mastering it, hence the reason why parents should not
use technology to monitor teens.

Tran3

To add on, the bond between a child and a parent is one of a kind, but it can be destroyed
when parents depend on technology to watch their children. The author of the article Big
Brother meets Big Mother, Donna St. George, states the consequences of stalking: Then the
tether becomes a leash and parenting becomes stalking. We don't talk; we track. That's when it's
time to say, Black Helicopter down (George). Parents who stalk their teen utilize less
communication and depend more on the technology. When parents are not talking to their teen
about the problem face-to-face, it destroys the special bond between them. The parents and their
teen will start to drift away from each other and suffer communication problems. Likewise,
within the article Spy-master parents might uncover trust problems, John Keilman, the author,
illustrates the trust problems between a parent and a teen: The problem with that is that trust just
breaks down between parent and child. Without trust and mutual respect, things get a lot more
difficult." Trust breaks down when parents spy on their teen without them knowing. When there
is no trust from parents and mutual respect, the bonds between parents and teens are destroyed.
The teen can no longer trust the parent and vice versa. Teens should be able to communicate and
trust their parents, but how are they going to do that when parents are spying on them behind
their backs? Therefore technology should not be used by parents to watch teenagers.
One can argue that parents should use technology to monitor teenagers because it allows
parents to see what teens are doing on the internet. It can also help keep teens out of danger
whether it is online or outside. However, the use of technology for spying can create problems
for both parents and teenagers. Destroying the relationship between parent and child, stalling
their development of life skills, and restricting their ability to be independent are problems that
can be created by monitoring teens with technology. It is essential for parents to understand the
consequences of stalking teens with technology, so they can prevent teenagers from being too
dependent on others.

Tran4

Tran5

Works Cited
Bayless, Kate. What Is Helicopter Parenting? Parents. 2013. Web. 6 May 2016.
Coben, Harlan. The Undercover Parent. NYTimes.com. 16 March 2008. Web. 6 May 2016.
Goodman, Ellen. Big Brother Meets Big Mother. Boston Globe. 2 November 2007. Web. 6
May 2016.
Keilman, John. Spy-master Parents Might Uncover Trust Problems. Chicago Tribune. 19
August 2014. Web. 6 May 2016.
St. George, Donna. Parents Investigated for Neglect After Letting Kids Walk Home Alone.
Washington Post. 6 May 2015. Web. 6 May 2016.