You are on page 1of 15

1

Claudine Dombrowskis Voice Claudine Dombrowski has been an activist in the domestic violence movement for a long time. Her picture has become synonymous with the term battered mother and for battered women, she has become a revered icon. Throughout her court cases and her blog, there is much talk about reporting domestic violence, not reporting, using ones voice to share their story, and remaining silent. The common opinion is that domestic violence will not stop unless it is reported and prosecuted. All states have mandatory reporting laws now, but there are times when those in authority discourage disclosure of abuse. The consensus is that domestic violence, as a whole will not stop unless it is reported and prosecuted. Perhaps when reporting and prosecuting are both applied according to the letter and intent of the laws, the incidences of domestic violence would decrease. One has to have an understanding of domestic violence in order to make it stop, and when children are involved the cycle gets much more complicated. Claudines life provides a view into the life of a battered mother as we try to understand when, how, why and if domestic violence should be reported by the victim. Claudine Dombrowski has been through family Court, Appeals court, the United States Supreme Court and her case is currently in the Inter-American Commission on Human Rights Court (IACHR), which is our international court. From her case record, the core issues that brought her into the system were child custody and domestic violence. She was a psychiatric LPN when she met the father of her child. She was four months pregnant when she found out he was married and their relationship went downhill from there. They later married and he filed for divorce four months later. During

litigation he admitted to hitting Claudine, and beating her two or three times a week. He kicked her out and at times she left in an effort to keep herself and her baby girl safe. The court used that as evidence that she would hide the child from the father. He had eight criminal convictions, including three for domestic violence against her and assaulting a police officer. He was ordered to anger management but they asked him to leave. Both parents went through psychological evaluations and Claudine was deemed safe to be around her child and he admitted to violence, yet he has custody. The photographs of her abuse are publicly available on the Internet, many were used as evidence in her case (Dombrowski et el). Jay Silverman wrote concerning a three year study on battered mothers in Massachusetts which included four hour interviews with abused mothers in their twenties to their fifties who were involved in family court. Their incomes ranged from fifteen thousand to one hundred and five thousand per year. Advocates for these women were also questioned about how the court experience was from their perception, and focus groups were also used. Mothers stated their evidence was ignored by court officials in regards to domestic violence and because of that custody of their children was stripped. The majority experienced continued abuse or mistreatment by their ex-partners after leaving them and entering the court system. More than a third claimed they were stalked after the separation and nearly one-fourth received death threats. Most women reported the restraining order was violated and they were abused either physically or sexually. Their children were also harmed during court-ordered exchanges or visits. More than half had lost complete or partial custody at some point during the proceedings (Silverman).

Phyllis Chesler explains in her book, Mothers on Trial, that in 82% of the disputed custody cases fathers were awarded sole custody even though only 13% had been involved in the care of their child before the divorce (79). The American Bar Association, in a publication for court judges has stated that abusive spouses may use threats to seek custody to maintain control (Rauber 104). One of the publications by the American Judges Association accepts the fact that batterers have been able to convince the authorities that victims are unfit or dont deserve sole custody in approximately 70% of challenged custody cases (American 5). Claudines IACHR case speaks of the role of court personnel in her legal battle too. Dr. Bernie Nobo, a licensed social worker diagnosed her as depressed and the father with adjustment disorder. He testified that he had to stop the father from assaulting Claudine in a meeting. He recommended supervised visitation for the father. The court services officer suggested the child be put into foster care, punishing the child and the mother further. The concern was the child having access to the father, not the safety of the mother and child. The Guardian ad litem, commonly referred to as a GAL, recommended custody go to the father because he lived closer to the court and the GAL said the violence was so far fetched he did not believe it. Judges were changed on her case over time and one judge said that she provoked the violence that was perpetrated against her. When her child spoke about the abuse Child Protective Services claimed the childs words were coached (Dombrowski et el). Silvermans 2005 study in Massachusetts discussed the fact that battered mothers get mixed messages from the government. These women are urged by state personnel to leave the abuser and go to a shelter, and when they comply they are pressured by the

court system work out a custody and visitation schedule with him. Victims are also pressured to encourage a positive relationship between the children and their father, even when he abused the children. The study also found situations where state personnel ignored or minimized reports of abuse made by the mothers, or the failure to investigate allegations. Documented evidence of abuse was also not examined by the proper authorities. One of those mothers reported telling the GAL about the history of violence and the fact that she was now disabled from the abuse. His response was, No one cares about that abuse crap (Silverman). Bemillers study on battered mothers losing custody in Ohio found that institutional abuse was prevalent in these cases. Women were denied basic rights in the court system and were discriminated against because of their gender resulting in the loss of their children. It was common for the women to speak of judges who ruled in favor of fathers who had been found guilty of abusing their wives and children. One mom refused to take her child to visit the father after medical professionals determined he was sexually and physically abusing the child, and that action caused her to lose custody. The study had a mix of races and the women had similar experiences, therefore race is not an issue. Women are also more likely to give up custody because they are scared of the perpetrator (Bemiller15-24). Crnkovics study involving mental health professionals perception to the needs of women in shelters reports therapists believe that the fear of retribution and patriarchy contribute to a block in family treatment. This study was done in 2000 and it states, Unfortunately, many competent health professionals have not received education specific to the dynamics of family violence. Mothers are viewed in a victim role by these professionals and are prescribed

more mental health issues than they actually have, which makes it more difficult for the mothers to move on with their lives (Crnkovick). Claudines case issues fit in well with the studies done on this issue. After she lost custody, she complained that if she wanted to see her child, the father forced her to have sex. The case manager told her that was just part of co-parenting. She was ordered not to call law enforcement in regards to the childs father without getting permission from her case manager. She was court ordered not to report abuse. She was silenced. Claudine was later assaulted with a hammer by a woman who later admitted the father paid her and assured her no charges would be filed. Claudines case history ends with a statement, the lesson is clear-dont report abuse (Dombrowski et el). Not reporting abuse is not always an option as we have mandatory reporting requirements in the states now. In a study published in a medical journal, Laura Iavicoli explains that often the emergency room is the first place women go to, and mandatory reporting means that medical records can be shared regardless of what HIPAA says. Those who support it believe it helps with the prosecution of batterers and the violence would escalate if it is not reported. Those opposed feel the violence will increase and it compromises the Dr. Patient issues of confidentiality. Most of the women surveyed believe that mandatory reporting decreases the rate of disclosure. Victims of sexual abuse do not want it reported because of embarrassment, fear of the perpetrator or fear of the public finding out (Iavicoli). Often women learn, after they have suffered at the hands of a violent man, that they can lose custody of their children for making a bad choice in a dating partner due to something called failure to protect. Lisa Homes, a shelter director in Kentucky thinks it

would be better if we could adjudicate cases of domestic violence faster and if women had the support of child protection workers instead of being afraid of them taking their children away. There are those who believe the cabinet recommends custody be removed from a domestic violence victim because she fails to protect her child (Spears) Kentucky revised statutes define an abused or neglected child, in part, as one whose health or welfare is harmed or threatened when a parent allows an act of abuse to be committed or creates or allows a risk of physical, sexual or emotional injury that is not accidental (KRS600.020). The statutes also require that definition of abuse to be considered in the best interest of the child, which is used in custody placement (KRS620.023). When Claudine spoke at the joint committee in Kansas hoping to get some visits with her child she said, It comes back to the family court that has a veil of immunity. They dont fully understand the impact of the violence. What battered women have if they report the abuse, then theyre failing to protect their child if they dont report the abuse, theyre still failing to protect their child. So, both ways, theyre going to lose their children (Drew). One must question why it is worse to try to protect your child and fail than it is to intentionally perpetrate acts of abuse on them or in front of them. There are those cases where the power of society combines with the mindset of a mothers duty to protect her children, which become quite ugly. Corrine Baker was the feature story on NBC news for a long time. She was mother of Dominick Calhoun, and is in prison for the murder of her child. Corrine used her body to shield Dominick against her boyfriends attacks. She failed to protect him from abuse. The perpetrator was also

jailed but the media focus was on her (NBC). In the Journal Of Criminal Law & Criminology , Jacobs discusses the case of Pauline Zile In one of their articles. Ms. Ziles daughter died at the hands of her husband, the childs stepfather. Pauline reported her missing at first and is currently in prison for failing to protect her. When she was sentenced to life without parole the public wanted her to die. The connections between violence perpetrated against the mother and her children have not been completely understood by the courts. As awareness increases, so does the likelihood of the mother being prosecuted. It makes no difference that the mother and child are abused by the same person. Just because the mother has been abused, courts will not excuse mothers who fail to protect their children. The courts perspective is that since she is aware of the violence at home, she needs to do more to protect her children. The law holds both parents to the same duty, but society labels the mother as the childs protector and expects the mother to suppress her own needs to protect her child. (Jacobs) The idea of failure to protect seems to subtly find its way into many court hearings with the common question Why did you return to the father of your child if he abused you? Once one knows the statutes the question is really quite moot. During an interview of Claudine with Kansas District Attorney Chad Taylor, she was asked that question. For Claudine the answer was simple, "I had a choice I could see my daughter, or I could never see her again. The abuser had complete control, so I got my daughter back and went back to him" (Spears). Claudines case in the IACHR claims that U.S. courts have failed to protect children from abuse by awarding custody to proven abusers and child molesters (Dombrowski). A study done in 2008 on those who murder their families reports that men almost always commit familicides, and they do it to control

their wives (Liem, Marieke, and Frans Koenraadt). Claudines case raised a good strong point in 2007, but the court has yet to render a decision. Apparently they have mistaken her for someone who will give up, shut up or go away. Regarding domestic violence in general, Kathleen Waits states reasons for underreporting include the belief that family issues are private, the taboo stigma of abuse, and people are ashamed that they violated the norm of a happy home life. Before victims admit the violence to another they must first admit it to themselves. Both partners lie about the existence of abuse as well as the extent. Battering occurs in all socio economic groups but the issues of the poor are more likely to come to the governments attention. The abused woman cannot control the batterer and violence will only cease with intervention. The sooner the intervention comes after the couples first violent experience the better the chance of stopping the violence. Economic issues and alcohol may trigger abuse but they do not cause it. Both parties blame the victim for the violence, which makes it more difficult for the victim to prosecute. Fear and manipulation are used to keep the victim from leaving or to persuade her to return. Abuse escalates when she tries to leave. Social forces keep victims trapped in the relationships when they condone the abuse. Friends and family may refuse to acknowledge that abuse exists in the relationship or they dont believe her when she discloses. That will push her further into denial. Often people will focus on what she could have done to provoke him, and she may be discouraged from leaving for economic reasons. On the other hand, those who condemn her for not leaving increases her fears that she is crazy and force her into further secrecy. Considering the convicted batterer may only receive a lecture as punishment, the decision if and when to leave must be hers (Waits).

A criminologist states that victims will contemplate if calling the police will be helpful in attaining their goals as there are incentives and costs to reporting. They will call police for immediate crisis or to stop further attacks, but if they view the incident as trivial, they will not call. A mother is motivated to call to protect her children. To receive legal assistance they must be able to convince the police a crime has been committed, and they may not call if they think the perpetrator will not be punished or the punishment will be minimal. Reasons for not reporting include maintaining their social status, the desire to protect the offender, economic dependence or desire to protect children, fear of reprisals, if they have engaged in illegal activities and the fear of the cost of ongoing legal proceedings. (Deane). In her meeting with the judiciary committee Claudine said, When women try to get away from people who hurt them I heard somebody say its really hard to believe you wont call the police I tell people not to contact the police, because as soon as you walk into court with a domestic violence issue and children, youre already cutting your throat. You will lose your children. Thats the way it is right now. Kiegerl, a chair person in the meeting did not believe that her abuse was totally ignored, or that a person could be prohibited from speaking about their own case. Abuse should always be reported he said (Drew). In reading various things written in Claudines blogs and articles I observed some mixed messages. Much was posted on how detrimental it was to report, but there were also articles on how silence can kill. There was also encouragement to speak out on domestic violence. She openly encourages women to share their story. It made no sense to have a woman not report and yet publicly share her experience. A college friend

10

contacted her through Facebook for me and she agreed to an interview. When I asked her if a victim should report or not, she said A woman should follow her gut. She explained that because domestic violence is not prosecuted, it becomes acceptable and is used as a weapon to lose children in the court proceedings. The situation is similar to the story of the prisoners of war as it includes coercive control, torture and basic human rights violations. She said she would report abuse if it was validated, and she shares her story because that is validation. She said one has to have validation before they can begin to heal from the trauma. When a report is made there is no validation, only more punishment and victim blaming. The sharing of the experience, in whatever form the survivor chooses is her validation (Claudine 11/5/12). Jay Silverman states In many cases, the telling of the stories itself was reported by participants to be part of their healing process as well as a catalyst for their growing activism (Silverman). Claudine Dombrowski is still in the legal system, her daughter will be of age very soon. She and Lorraine Tipton are Co-founders of a group called The American Mothers Political Party. They are considered radical feminists, as well as radical anti-feminists but they consider themselves maternalists. Lorraine and Claudine encourage mothers to share their voice and assist in any way they can. The Duo have invited mothers to share their story on their blog talk radio show with or without their name shared. Being forced into silence either by fear of the perpetrator or by the court system, is a form of abuse. The American Mothers are a huge group of mothers who advocate for other mothers. They will write each others stories and make calls to the judges in each others cases. The following is huge but the majority of mothers will not publicly speak out because the fear of judicial retaliation or physical abuse is so great (Claudine 11/12).

11

Reporting of domestic violence and sexual abuse is a sensitive issue and it is more complicated when children are involved. Race, income and state of residence have no bearing when it comes to battering. All states have mandatory reporting laws in place, but a victim still holds the power of disclosure. Victims are expected to report abuse even if it occurs to them, and that is a problem if they are unable to face it long enough to admit it exists. There are criminal charges for not reporting, but for many, it is still in their best interest not to report. Court officials and mental health professionals still do not understand the cycle of domestic violence, and yet they are quick to make decisions and treatment plans for this issue. Professionals and court officers are not educated enough to tell a woman she and he children are safer when they leave their abuser. Claudine Dombrowskis role in the movement is not only positive but also necessary. If women cannot receive protection from the courts or the police they have no where to go. If they disclose to health care professionals they can lose their children. There is no way for them to stay safe or keep their children safe in our current system. It is very clear that the choice of if, when and how to report needs to remain with those who have had violence perpetrated against them. Claudines group offers support for these moms and helps them find ways to get their voice out so they can heal. At least those women who lose custody to those who abuse them are not alone, thanks to Claudine.

Works Cited

12

American Judges Association. Domestic Violence in the Courtroom Understanding the Problem...knowing the victim. American Judges Association, 2012. Web. <http://aja.ncsc.dni.us/domviol/publications_domviobooklet.htm>. Bemiller, Michelle. "When Battered Mothers Lose Custody: A Qualitative Study Of Abuse At Home And In The Courts." Journal Of Child Custody 5.3/4 (2008): 228255. Academic Search Premier. Web. 31 Oct. 2012. Chesler, Phylis. Mothers on Trial: The Battle for Children and Custody. New York: Harcourt Brace Jovanovich, Publishers, 1991. 79. Print. Crnkovic, A. Elaine, Robert L. Del Campo, and Robert Steiner. "Mental Health Professionals' Perceptions Of Women's Experiences Of Family Violence." Contemporary Family Therapy: An International Journal 22.2 (2000): 147. Academic Search Premier. Web. 31 Oct. 2012. Dobrowski, Claudine, dir. Abused Mom Wants Unsupervised Visits with Daughter. Dir. KansasWatchdogTV. 2009. Web. 5 Dec 2012. <1.http://www.youtube.com Dombrowski et el v US (2007) http://www.stopfamilyviolence.org/pages/308 Dombrowski, Claudine. Telephone Interview. 10 2012. Drew, Jessica. "Domestic Violence is on the Rise in Shawnee County." The Genocide of Battered Mothers and their Children. Claudine Dombrowski, 28 2011. Web. 1 Nov 2012. Deane, Glenn et al. "Reasons For Reporting and Not Reporting Domestic Violence To The Police." Criminology 40.3 (2002): 617. Academic Search Premier. Web. 31 Oct. 2012

13

Iavicoli, Laura G. "Mandatory Reporting Of Domestic Violence: The Law, Friend Or Foe?." Mount Sinai Journal Of Medicine 72.4 (2005): 228-231. Academic Search Premier. Web. 31 Oct. 2012. Jacobs, Michelle S. "Requiring Battered Women Die: Murder Liability for Mothers under Failure to Protect Statutes." Journal of Criminal Law & Criminology 88.2 (1998): 579-660. Academic Search Premier. Web. 31 Oct. 2012. KRS600.020 http://www.lrc.ky.gov/KRS/600-00/020.PDF KRS620.023 http://www.lrc.ky.gov/KRS/620-00/023.PDF Liem, Marieke, and Frans Koenraadt. "Familicide: A Comparison With Spousal And Child Homicide By Mentally Disordered Perpetrators." Criminal Behaviour & Mental Health 18.5 (2008): 306-318. Academic Search Premier. Web. 4 Oct. 2012 NBC, prod. Corrine Baker Interview Part 2. Perf. Corrine Baker. 2011. Film. 2 Oct 2012. <http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=SzZy84dYSsw>. Rauber, Diane. American Bar Association. Judges Guide Making Child-Centered Decisions in Custody Cases. 2008. Web. <http://apps.americanbar.org/legalservices/probono/childcustody/judges_guide.pd f>. Silverman, Jay G.et al. "Battered Mothers Speak Out." Violence against Women 11.11 (2005): 1367-1395. Academic Search Premier. Web. 4 Oct. 2012. Spears. "Safety of Children not Always a Priority for State in Domestic Violence Cases." Lexington Herald Leader 26 Feb 2012, n. pag. Print. <6.http://www.kentucky.com/2012/02/26/2084442/safety-of-children-not-

14

always.html>.

http://www.kentucky.com/2012/02/26/2084442/safety-of-

children-not-always.html Waits, Kathleen. "The Criminal Justice System's Response to Battering: Understanding the Problem, forging the Solutions." Trans. Array Feminist Jurisprudence. Patricia Smith. 1st. Oxford: Oxford Publishing Co., 1993. 188-209. Print.

15

You might also like