Idolatry, Conditional Love and the Western/American Wife - -

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The case of the Western/American Husband is dealt with in another post. 01/30/13 Tyler & Tyler Posts and Publications http://www.facebook.com/group.php?gid=2648256332; http://www.scribd.com/Elkanah21stCent; http://biblicalmarriagepolygyny.yuku.com/forums/66; PolyPolygamyPolygynyNJesus-owner@yahoogroups.com Go to almost any wedding and it is almost all about the bride. She is the main center of attraction. Her thoughts are of all that is being done for and about her, not for and about Jesus. So often her thoughts about the wedding night is about all what she wants him to do for her, not what she wants him to do for Jesus. And then she steps into the future of her marriage thinking that success in her marriage is measured by how he serves her, meets her needs, gives her what she wants, and what she expects him to do first if he wants her respect and sexual affection; not measured by how he serves Jesus and gives Jesus what He wants. This is selfcentered behavior and not the Christ centered behavior that is the standard for the godly woman. Even 1 Corinthians 13 is twisted and misapplied in the case of the Christian wife. Christ's true Love standard is a Love which is characterized by patience, kindness, gentleness, fairness, humility, unselfishness, kind and supportive speech, forbearance, hope, optimism, laughter, fun, affirmation, acceptance, physical and emotional safety, friendliness; free of envy or boasting; by the absence of arrogance or rudeness; free of insisting on one's own way and rivalry; without irritableness or resentment; without rejoicing at wrongdoing, but rejoicing with the Truth. It is a Love that bears with all things, wantsto believe the best in all things, hopes for all good things for each other, and endures all things with and for each other. So often the Christian wife is encouraged to have conditional love, a love that holds that the Christian wife will have 1 Corinthians 13 Love for her husband if he has earned it, or has behaved well enough to deserve it. The husband is told that he won't or can't get it unless he behaves well enough, has earned it. This conditional love teaching encourages the wife to feel that if her husband isn't having 1 Corinthians 13 for her, she has the right to relate to him in a manner that is impatient, unkind, envious, insolent, self-centered, selfish, irritable and resentful. This conditional love is sinful, ungodly, carnal, a work of the old sin nature and devilish. A major tragedy in the Christian community, as the divorce statistics indicate, is that the wife fails to recognize the crucial importance of her sexual ministry to her husband. She doesn't see her marital ministry as that which God has prescribed for her and her husband to avoid sexual immorality (1 Corinthians 7:2-5). So many have been tricked into thinking that marital sex is a duty that she should perform reluctantly or under coercion, (1) rather than thinking that she sexually ministers to her husband because she Loves Jesus enough to obey Him, (2) rather than knowing that her sexual ministry to her husband saves them both from experiencing the heart break of seeing their marriage fail because of sexual immorality. The tragedy is compounded by the wife's coming to think that she doesn't have to Love Jesus enough to obey His instructions about her behavior with and to her husband if he doesn't deserve it or hasn't earned it. This is how that looks: [1] God's instruction in 1 Corinthians 7:2 but because of [and to avoid] sexual immorality . . . each woman should be [sexually] having her own man sinfully BECOMES each wife should be sexually having her own man IF he has been giving her 1 Cor 13 Love and treating her like a princess or goddess. [2] God's instruction in 1 Corinthians 7:3 . . . the wife [should be rendering the kindness, intimate marital duty, benevolence and good will <Lexicon 2133> that is due, owed and obligated<Lexicon 3784>] unto the husband sinfully BECOMES the wife will render the kindness, intimate marital duty, benevolence and good will that is due, owed and obligated unto the husband IF he has been rendering the kindness, intimate marital duty, benevolence and good will that is due, owed and obligated unto her, giving her 1 Cor 13 Love and treating her like a princess or goddess. [3] God's instruction in 1 Corinthians 7: 4. The woman doesn't have [sexual] authority over her own body, but the husband [does]; in like manner also the man doesn't have [sexual] authority over his own body, but the woman [does] sinfully BECOMES the woman doesn't have [sexual] authority over her own body, but the husband does IF he has been giving her 1 Cor 13 Love and treating her like a princess. [4] God's instruction in 1 Corinthians 7:5 Do not be denying each other [sexually], unless, it may be, by consent for a time, that you may devote yourselves to fasting and prayer, and again be conjugally

cohabiting [sexually reuniting], that Satan might not tempt you because of your failure to control yourself sinfully BECOMES I can deny him sexually IF I don't feel like it, don't want it or he hasn't treated me right; and I will be conjugally cohabiting [sexually reuniting] with him again only IF I feel like it, want it or if he has been treating me well enough. [5] God's instruction in Proverbs 5:19 . . . her breasts should satisfy/intoxicate/saturate you at all times; you should be intoxicated continually with her affectionate loving sinfully BECOMES her breasts might satisfy/intoxicate/saturate him only IF she feels like it, wants it or IF he has been treating her well enough; he might be intoxicated continually with her affectionate loving only IF she feels like it, wants it or if he has been treating her well enough. [6] God's instruction in Ephesians 5:***Ephesians 5:33 . . .each man should [kindly, gently, humbly, generously, unselfishly and perseveringly] be Loving his wife as he does [Love] himself [WHETHER OR NOT SHE DESERVES IT], and the wife is [instructed] to be respecting her husband [WHETHER OR NOT HE DESERVES IT] BECOMES the wife is [instructed] to be respecting her husband only IF he has earned it [conditional love], she feels like it, wants it or IF he has been treating her well enough So both the wife and the husband have the same choice that Adam and Eve had in the Garden, i.e. should I obey Jesus or should I do what I want to do. Jesus has given us the choice between marital death or abundantly joyful marital life. To do one's marriage the way one wants to do it leads to heartache, grief, anger, resentment, bitterness, sexual immorality and the loss of the consciousness of Jesus' presence. To do one's marriage the Way Jesus instructs us to do it is to experience in one's marriage Jesus' kind Love, everlasting Life, liberating Truth, enlightening Light and His wonderful Way of being married. To do one's marriage the Way Jesus instructs us to do it, doing it for Jesus, is to know that you are in Him and know Him and that He knows you as His own child. ***John 14:15 If you love me, you will keep my commands; . . . 21 Those who accept my commandments and obey them are the ones who love me. My Father will love those who love me; I too will love them and reveal myself to them. ***1 John 2:3 This is how we are sure that we have come to know Him: by keeping His commands. 4 Anyone who says, I know Him, but isnt obeying His commands is a liar the Truth is not in him. 5 But whoever keeps His Word, in him truly the Love of God is perfected. By this we may know that we are in Him: ***Hebrews 5:8 Though He was Gods Son, He learned obedience from the things which He suffered. 9 And having been made perfect, He became to all those who obey Him the source of eternal salvation, For the details and testimonies about this godly kind of marriage cn be found at http://peacefulwife.com/.