How to Write an Effective Business Report

ACKNOWLEDGEMENTS

Many people have contributed to the development of the ideas presented in this thesis. Among them I owe a particular debt of gratitude to Professor CHEN Jie, my supervisor, for her enthusiastic support, expert advice and timely guidance during the process of the writing and revising of my thesis.

My acknowledgements also go to all the teachers at the Language School, particularly Professor LUO Guoliang, Professor HUANG Yuanshen, Professor ZHANG Chunhong, Professor XU Yaqin, and Professor LU Naisheng, whose lectures have offered me great insights into the thesis.

In addition, I feel grateful to my classmates, from whom I obtained many enlightening ideas in discussions.

Finally, my great appreciation is reserved for my family and my friends who have loved and supported me over the years.

For those whose names should have been mentioned but are left out here, I offer my sincere apology.

 WTO

Table of Contents .i Abstract..1 Chapter One The Business Report 1.1 Reports in general..2 1.1.1 Definition2 1.1.2 Function..2 1.1.3 Classification..3 1.2 Business Reports4 1.2.1 Definition....4 1.2.2 Function..6 1.2.3 Component Parts.7 1.2.4 Required Qualities..8 1.2.5 Guiding Principles.12

Chapter Two Communication 2.1 Communication Process...14 2.2 Definition of Communication..16 2.3 Written Communication...16 2.4 Business Communication.17 2.5 Basic Truths of Communication...18 2.6 Adaptation19

Chapter Three Linguistic Requirements for Effective Business Report Writing 3.1 Word Selection22 3.1.1Use Concrete Words.23 3.1.2 Use Familiar Words.24 3.1.3 Choose Short Words26 3.1.4 Use Technical Words with Caution.28 3.1.5 Prefer Active Verbs to Passive ones29 3.1.6 Avoid Overuse of Camouflaged Verbs.31

3.2 Sentence Construction.33 3.2.1 Emphasize Short Sentences..33 3.2.2 Design Effective Sentences..38 3.2.3 Give the Sentence Unity39 3.2.4 Write Sentences for Variety...42

3.3 Paragraph..43 3.3.1 Give the Paragraph Unity43 3.3.2 Keep the Paragraph Short..44 3.3.3 Make Good Use of Topic Sentences.45 3.3.4 Move the Paragraph Forward48 3.3.5 Use Transitional devices...48

Chapter Four Steps in Writing the Business Report 4.1 Define the Problem..51 4.2 Analyze the Reader..51 4.3 Collect Information.52

4.4 Arrange and Interpret Information...52 4.5 Construct the Outline..53 4.6 Write the Draft.53 4.7 Revise the Report.....54

Conclusion.55

Abstract

After Chinas entry into the WTO, more and more foreign enterprises have been targeting China as a market. The number of foreign-owned companies has increased dramatically. However, a problem of ineffective communication within a company has emerged as well.

Business report writing as a major means of communication can never be ignored or even overlooked, because our development in a company depends heavily on how we express ourselves. Only by effective communication (verbal of non-verbal), can we make known to our employers what we are doing and how well we are doing. Furthermore, no business can be run efficiently or can function at all without the regular flow of business reports.

With linguistics as the focus, this thesis falls into 4 chapters altogether.

Chapter one is a general introduction to the business report, including its definition, component parts, required qualities and guided principles of successful business report writing. Chapter two touches the basic theories on communication and the inherent relation between business report writing and communication. Chapter three discusses linguistic requirements for an effective business report: word choice, sentence construction, and paragraph building. Chapter four deals with several procedures for writing an effective business report.

Key Words: communication process, linguistic requirements, business report writing

Chapter One

The Business Report

1.1 Reports in General 1.1.1 Definition

There is no doubt that reports are commonplace in the 21st-century business world. Virtually all organizations use them. And most corporations use them extensively. In fact, it is unlikely that any modern organization of size could function without using reports. But in spite of the fact that reports are so commonplace there is disagreement in defining them.

Definitions in current use range from one extreme to the other. By the broadest definition, reports are all presentations of information ranging from the extremely formal to the highly informal.1 Narrower definitions limit reports to the more formalized presentations of information to improve readability. Also, to be impartial and objective a report presents accurate, reliable information logically, without emotional appeals.

1.1.2 Function
It is well known that todays complex, technological business organizations literally feed on information. In every phase of business work, people send and receive information. The information flow involves many forms of communication. Obviously oral communication makes up a large part of it. In addition, there are all the various types of forms and records that are kept and exchanged. And of course, there are various forms of written communication. Among the written forms of business communication, reports play a very major role. They enable management authority to keep track of normal operations, to learn about unexpected developments, and to judge whether progress is satisfactory on new projects. They enable the executive to base his or her decision on the advice of specialists. They are the link between research and the practical utilization of their discoveries. They sometimes are the only tangible result of long and expensive work. In general, they comprise one of the most important parts of the process of communication that is vital to efficient operation in government and industry.

1.1.3 Classification

1 Thomas A. Sherman, Modern Technical Writing. New Jersey: Prentice-Hall, Inc, 1982

Understanding the classification of the report help the writer to focus on the information and ideas to be expressed and the best format to present them. As they serve various purposes, reports can be classified according to the following factors.

Subject matter
Probably the simplest of all report classifications used is the one by subject matter. Obviously all reports concern some subject. It is equally obvious that reports can be classified on the basis of some logical grouping of subjects.

The possibilities of classifying by subject matter are almost limitless, being bound only by the infinite differences among report topics. Subject classifications, therefore, could be based on tiny differences in content, or they could follow broader and more general lines. For example, in the field of accounting, distinctions in subject matter could provide classifications such as cost, audit, tax, and finance. But such divisions generally are not practical. A more practical and more widely used subject classification is one that follows broader lines-----for example, one based on broad subject fields such as accounting, management, economics, finance, engineering, and marketing.

Function
Reports can be to inform or to analyze. The informational report merely presents the facts and a summary----without analyzing, interpreting, drawing conclusions, or making recommendations. The analytical report presents facts, analyzes and interprets them, and makes conclusions as well as recommendations if needed.

Formality
Formal reports are generally long and about complex problems. They always include---in addition to the body---some or all of these prefatory and supplemental parts: Prefatory parts---cover; title fly; title page; letters of authorization, acceptance, approval, transmittal; acknowledgments; table of contents; synopsis, abstract, or summary. Body---- introduction, text, terminal section Supplemental part---- appendix, bibliography, index

Informal reports usually include only the body. Some informal reports, however, may have a title page, transmittal, and appendix.

Origin
This is authorized or voluntary. We write authorized reports when requested or authorized to do so by another person. The voluntary report is written on our own initiative.

Frequency of issue
Reports may be periodic or special. The periodic report comes out at regular intervals, such as daily, weekly, monthly, or yearly. The special report involves a single occasion or unique situation.

1.1 The Business Report 1.2.1 Definition

A business report is an impartial, objective, and planned presentation of factual information that serves some business purpose.1

A careful inspection of this definition reveals the identifying characteristics of the business report. As an orderly communication, a report is given some care in preparation. And care in preparation distinguishes a report from the casual, routine exchanges of information that continually occur in business. This is not to say that all reports are carefully prepared, but it does mean that at least something above minimum care is given in their preparation.

The objective quality of a business report is its unbiased approach to the facts presented. The report seeks truth, regardless of its consequences. The word communication is broad by definition, concerning all ways of transmitting meaning (speaking, writing, drawing, gesturing, and such.). For all practical purposes, however, business reports are either written or oral. And for reasons that will be given shortly, in todays complex business operations the more significant reports are written.

1 Raymond U. Lesikar, Report Writing for Business. Illinois: Richard D. Irwin, Inc., 1981

The basic element of the report includes factual informationevents, records, and the various forms of data that are communicated in the conduct of business. Not all reports are business reports. Research scientists, medical doctors, ministers, students, and many others write reports. Thus, the need for the final phrase of the definition is obvious. To be classified as a business report, a report must serve some business purpose. The purpose may be to solve a problem, such as how a company can profitably use an electronic computer? The purpose may be to present information needed in the conduct of business: a weekly report of a salespersons activities, a summary of the days production, or an explanation of expenditures on a particular project. In general, a business report is an impartial, objective, planned presentation of facts to one or more persons for a specific, significant business purpose.

Even though this definition of a business report is specific enough to be meaningful, it is broad enough to take into account the variations to be found in reports. For example, some reports do nothing more than present facts. Others go a step further by including interpretations. Still others proceed to conclusions and recommendations. There are reports formally dressed both in writing style and in physical appearance. And there are reports that evidence a high degree of informality. The definition given permits all these variations.

1.2.2 Function
The business report, in a real sense, is the vehicle that enables the organization to gather data in a single, coherent document, build understanding, solve problems and make decisions.

The business report is generally problem-oriented or opportunity-oriented. Sometimes it is written in order to identify and explain a problem facing the corporation. At other times, it is prepared to present possible solutions to problems. And the business report may be used to analyze a situation or describe how a unit or department is attempting to overcome previous or present problems.

The business report is also an action-oriented document. It is not a theoretical paper on an abstract and inconsequential question. The report puts a fence around a problem, presents an analysis of situation, offers justified conclusions, and finally, makes carefully substantial recommendations.

In general, the business report serves several purposes: To provide management with information needed for sound decision-making, or informing others of decisions already made. To provide information for the record: such as minutes of meeting. To serve as evidence in court cases.1

1.2.3 Component Parts

For ease and understanding, we will talk about the parts by groups. First are the prefatory parts. Then comes the report body, which, of course, is the meat of all business reports. The final group consists of appended parts. They are included largely to serve any special interests the reader 1 Warren L. Thomas, Technical Writing. California: Wadsworth Publishing Co., 1988

may have in the problems or to help the reader in his or her use of the business report. As illustrated below:

Prefatory parts

Title fly Title page Preface or foreword Table of contents and list of illustrations Introduction Text/Body Conclusions or summaries Appendix

The body of the report Appended parts

Bibliography

From the table above, we can get a general idea about the three parts of a business report. The following are the details of them.

The Prefatory Parts

Title fly Typically it contains only the report title, which displays with eye-appealing balance. Title page Like the title fly, the title page presents the report title. But it also displays other information essential to the identification of the business report. Usually, it presents the complete identification of the writer. Preface Most business reports contain some form of the personal communication from writer to reader. And preface performs this function.

Table of contents

If a business report is long enough for a guide to its contents to be helpful, it

should have a table of contents. This table is the report outline in the finished and polished form.

The Report Body

Introduction The purpose of the introduction of the business report is to orient the reader of

the problem at hand. Text/Body This part presents the information collected and relates it to the problems. Normally it comprises the bulk of the content of a report. Specifically this part consists of the presentation of findings of the research. It includes the analysis of these findings and application of them to the problem. It is all that appears in the logical order report between the introduction and conclusion sections, including the supporting tables and charts that relate to this part. Truly it is the heart of the report. The Ending of the Report The ending of the report usually consists of a summary,

conclusions, recommendations, or a combination of the three.

Appended Parts
Appendix As its name implies, is a section tacked on. It is used for supplementary information that supports the body of the report but has no logical place within the body. Possible contents include questionnaires, working papers, summary tables, additional references, other reports, and so on.

Bibliography In business report writing, investigations that make heavy use of secondary research normally require a list of the sources (such as books, periodicals, and newspapers) used. The bibliography is such a list.

1.2.4 Required Qualities

Like any other kind of writing or report, a business report can be considered good or not mainly on its success in performing its function: to affect the readers as it is supposed to affect them. What specific qualities will help it to produce that result? Some of these qualities have been

noticed because they should be the same in other reports as well as in business reports. These include accuracy, adaptation of the contents and organization to the needs and abilities of the reader, and effective style. But a business report makes additional demands.

The following discussion will touch upon several specific qualities. Some of them reinforce each other, but there are times when an excessive effort to achieve one quality will mean the sacrifice of another. Thus in considering the question of how vigorously to cultivate any of them on a specific occasion we will need to foresee the circumstances that will probably prevail when our report is actually used, and decide what the report must be if it is to perform its function under those circumstances.

Objectivity
Being a basic quality of good business reports, objectivity concerns both the attitude of the writers and the writing style. We need to maintain an objective attitude by divorcing our prejudices and emotions from our work and by fairly reviewing and interpreting the information

we have uncovered. Thus, we approach the problem with an open mind and look at all sides of each question. Our role is much like that of a judge presiding over a court of law. We are not moved by personal feelings. We seek truth, and we leave no stone unturned in quest of it. We make our decisions only after carefully weighing all of the evidence. Whats more, a report built on the quality of objectivity has another point essential to good report writing. The point is believability.

Impersonal writing
A report, some writing authorities say, can be just as objective when written in personal style as when written in impersonal style. Frequently they encounter the argument that impersonal writing leads to an overuse of passive voice and a generally dull and writing style. This argument, however, lacks substance. Impersonal writing can and should be interesting.

Completeness
The business report is complete when it contains all the facts the reader needs for the desired action. If all points and explanations are sufficiently detailed, no misinterpretation will follow.

Completeness is necessary for a successful business report because complete messages are more likely to bring the desired results without missing important information. Thus, reports that seem inconsequential can be surprisingly important if the information they contain is complete and effective.

To achieve completeness in business report writing, we need to do as follows.

Make all points detailed. Evidence must be precisely stated. The significance of the facts in relation to the problem must be shown. The treatment for each section of the report must be complete, or the reader may misunderstand that particular section. The analysis is a basis for the conclusions, and the conclusions are a basis for the recommendations. All must be used to accomplish the purpose of the report.

Answer all questions asked. If the business report contains one or more questions, answer all questions clearly. If there is no information on a particular question, express clearly, instead of omitting an answer to one or more questions.

Different readers need different levels of completeness. We must consider the reader to achieve completeness. If the reader is familiar with the problem, few details are needed. If the reader is uninformed, complete explanations and interpretations are necessary.

Consistency
Consistency means maintaining uniformity by conforming to a predetermined pattern. The writer must be consistent in the form and style used and in the method of presenting the message to the reader.

Consistency in form includes uniformity of typing details such as margins, indentation, degrees of subject headings, listings, tabulations, numbering of page, footnote and bibliography entries, and the like. Consistency means following a set pattern concerning abbreviations, hyphenation, capitalization, spelling, and punctuation. Consistency must be maintained in making comparisons and in reasoning to reach logical conclusions. Staying with one viewpoint throughout the business report. Shifting from one to the other is illogical as well as confusing.

Coherence
Smoothness in the flow of information presented is an essential characteristic of good business report writing. In the well-written business report, each fact is in its logical place, and the relationship of each fact to other facts and to the plan of the report is clear to the reader. Coherence gives the business report this smoothness of connection. The best contributor to coherence is good organization. By relating facts in a logical, natural sequence, coherence is given to the writing.

Interest
Like all forms of good writing, a good report should be interesting. Actually the quality of interest is as important as the facts of the report, for without interest, communication is not likely to occur. If interest is not held, readers cant avoid missing parts of the messages. The writing must maintain their interest.

To accomplish the result, at least two concrete suggestions can be made. First, organize the body of the report so that the reader discovers as early as possible what benefits may result if our

report receives attention. Our skill in organizing in this manner yet at the same time making our plan logical and coherent will be one of the decisive factors. Second, in the preliminary parts, namely, the letter of the transmittal, the introduction, or the summary---provide a sentence or two deliberately calculated to arouse interest by foreshadowing the significance of the report. These sentences should be specific and concrete.

1.2.5 Guiding Principles

There are many principles involved in good report writing, but the stated ones below are so important that they may be taken as a guideline on which further developments rest.

First, wed better always have in mind a specific reader, real or imaginary, when we are writing a report; and always assume that he or she is intelligent, but uninformed.

Second, before we start to write, always decide what the exact purpose of our report is; and make sure that every paragraph, every sentence, and every word makes a clear contribution to that purpose, and makes it at the right time.

Use language that is simple, concrete, and familiar. And at the beginning and end of every section of our report, check our writing according to this principle: we tell the reader what we are going to tell him.

Chapter Two Communication

Reports are specialized forms of communication. And just as any other form of communication, they involve the communication process. It is not surprising, therefore, that writing techniques developed to make the communication process more effective in reports.

2.1 Communication Process

In describing the communication process, I shall use a situation in which two people are involved. One is a man named Gorge; the other is a woman named Mary. We will begin the description of the communication process with one of the two people (say Gorge) communicating something to Mary. The message sent may be formsgestures, facial expressions, drawings, or, more likely, written or spoken words. The message sent enters the sensory world of Mary.

The sensory world of Mary consists of all things around her as her sensory receptors detect them. The sensory receptors, of course, are eyes, ears, and nose that record impressions from reality.

Thus, the sensory world of Mary contains all that she feels, sees, hears, or smells. From this sensory world, her receptors pick up impressions and send them to her brain.

It should be noted, however, that Marys receptors cant detect all that exists in the world about her. Just how much they can detect depends on a number of factors. One determining factor is the ability of her individual sensory receptors to receive impressions. Not all receptors are equally sensitive. All ears do not hear equally well. Likewise, eyesights differ. So do abilities to smell. And so do the other senses vary from person to person.

Another determinant is Marys mental alertness. There are times, for example, when her mind is keenly alert to all that its senses can detect. There are other times when it is dull--- in a daydream, or the like.

Still another determinant is the sill of Marys mind. In varying degrees, the mind has the ability to tune in or tune out the events in the world of reality.

When Marys sensory receptors record something from her sensory world, they relay the information to her brain. The message sent by Gorge probably would be recorded in this way, but it could be joined by other impressions, such as outside noises, detection of movements, facial expressions, and such. In fact, Marys brain receives these impressions in a continuous flow--- a flow that may contract or expand, go fast or go slow, become strong or become weak.

This flow of stimulations into Marys mind begins the preverbal stage of communication. At this stage, the stream of sensory perceptions produces reactions in her mindreactions that will be given meaning and may trigger a communication response.

It is at this preverbal stage that the most complex part of the communication process occurs. The sensory perceptions pass through the filter of Marys mind, and they are given meaning. And her filter is made of all that has ever passed through her mind. Specifically it is made up of all her experience, knowledge, bias, and emotions. Obviously no two people have precisely identical filters, for no two people have precisely the same experience, knowledge, bias, and such.

Because peoples filters differ, meanings they assign to comparable perceptions also differ. One person, for example, may smile pleasantly when his or her filter receives the word liberal; another with sharply different background may react with violent anger at the same word. In one persons filter, the word butterball rings a jolly note; in the filter of one who has long been troubled with weight problems a negative connotation may occur. Even a salespersons cheery good morning may produce sharply various reactions. In a filter surrounded with happiness, the full positive meaning is received. A filter of a burdened, emotionally upset mind, on the other hand, may react with annoyance at these words that break into the minds unhappy state.

Next in the communication process is the symbolizing stage. At this stage, Marys mind reacts to the filtered information it has received. If the filtered information produces a sufficiently strong reaction, her mind may elect to communicate some form of response by words, by gesture, by action, or by some other means.

When Marys mind does elect to communicate, it next determines the general meaning the response will take. This process involves the innermost and most complex workings of the mind; and little is known about it. There is evidence, however, to indicate that ones ability here, and throughout the symbolizing stage, is related to ones mental capacities and to the extent to which one will permit the mind to react. Especially is one ability to evaluate filtered information and formulate meaning related to ones ability with language. Apparently ability with language equips one with a variety of symbol forms, and the greater the number of symbol forms in the mind, the more discriminating one can be in selecting them.

Mary ends the symbolizing stage by encoding the meaning formed in her mind. That is, she converts her meanings into symbols, and she transmits the symbols. In most instances, her symbol form is words, either made as sounds or as marks on paper. She also may select gestures, movements, facial expressions, diagrams, and such.

Transmittal of the encoded message ends the first cycle of the communication process. The transmitted signals next enter the sensory world that surrounds Gorge, and then begins a second cycle, identical to the first. Now, he picks up these symbols through his sensory receptors. They then travel through his nervous system to his brain. Here they are given meaning as they pass through his individual filter of knowledge, experience, bias, emotional makeup, and the like. The filtered meanings may also bring about a response, which Gorge then formulates in his mind, puts in symbol form, and transmits. The process may continue indefinitely, cycle after cycle, as long as the participants want to communicate.

2.2 Definition of Communication

Defining abstract words like communication is very difficult because such words do not denote any material object to which we can conveniently refer. Many different definitions of the word communication have been formulated.

Since we have a good understanding of the communication process, we can define communication as a process of sharing meaning between persons through an exchange of symbols enabling each person to elicit in his or her own mind a meaning similar to that in the mind of the other. 1Communication occurs when a message actually reaches its destination and is perceived by the receivers as the sender intended. Or in simpler words, communication means making known, making common.2

2.3 Written Communication

Although the above description of the communication process applies more specifically to faceto-face communication than to other forms, it generally describes written communication as well. But there are some significant differences.

The most significant difference between face-to-face communication and written communication is that written communication is more likely to be creative effort of the mind. The fact is that it is more likely to be thought out and less likely to be the spontaneous reaction to signs received by

1 Herta O. Murphy, Effective Business Communication. New York: Mcgraw-Hill Inc., 1980 2 Oxford dictionary, fourth edition, P278

the receptors. More specifically, the message in a written communication is more likely to be a result of stimuli produced by the mind than of outside stimuli picked up by the sensory receptors.

In a report-writing situation, before beginning work on the report, we writers have decided to communicate. Before we begin the task of communicating, we gather the information that will form the basis of their communication. Then through logical thought processes they encode the communication that will accomplish their communication objective. Thus, there is not likely to be an interchange of stimuli between communicants, nor is there likely to be any triggering of desires to communicate. The process is a creative and deliberative one.

Another difference between face-to-face and written communication processes is the time factor. In face-to-face communication, the encoded messages move instantaneously into the sensory environments of the participants. In written communication, however, some delay takes place. Just how long the delay will be is indeterminate. For example, the administrative announcements may be read minutes after they are written. Routine letters require a day or two to communicate their content. Research reports may take weeks in communicating their information to the intended readers. And all such written communications may be filed for possible reference in the indefinite future. They may continue to communicate for months or years.

2.4 Business Communication

Business communication is the process of transferring technical information from someone who has to someone who needs through the use of special forms and techniques designed to strengthen the readers comprehension of and response to that information.

In business communication, we will use special forms for particular purposes. For example, when we are providing background information on a particular topic, we will use an informational report; and when we are trying to persuade our readers to do something, we will use a feasibility report. Whatever the form we choose, we can improve our reports through the skillful dealing with a wide range of special devices or techniques.

2.5 Basic Truths of Communication

Analysis of the communication process brings out three underlying truths, which are helpful to understand communication.

Meanings sent are not always received.

First, meanings transmitted are not necessarily the meanings received. No two minds have identical words, gestures, facial expressions, or any of the other symbol forms; nor do any two minds attach exactly the same meanings to all the symbols they have in common. Because of these differences, errors in communication are bound to occur.

Meaning is in the mind.

A second underlying truth is that meaning is in the mind and not in the words or other symbols used. How accurately meaning is conveyed in symbols depends on how skillful one is in choosing symbols and how accurately the person receiving the symbols is able to interpret the meaning intended. Thus, skillful communicators look beyond the symbols used. They consider

the communication ability of those with whom they want to communicate. When they receive messages, they dont look at the symbols alone but for the meaning intended by the person who used them.

Communication is imperfect.
Third is the basic truth that communication is highly imperfect. One reason for this imperfection is that words are limited and at best are crude substitutes for the real thing. The word man can refer to any one of a few hundred million human males, and no two are precisely alike. The word dog stands for any one of a countless number of animals varying sharply in size, shape, color, and in every other visible aspect. The verb run tells only the most general part of the action it describes; it ignores the countless variations in speed, grace, and style. The illustrations are not exceptions; they are the rule. Words simply cant account for the infinite variations and complexities of reality.

Another reason for communication imperfection is that communicators vary in their abilities to convey their thoughts. Some find great difficulty in selecting symbols that express their simplest thoughts; others are highly capable. Variations in ability to communicate obviously lead to variations in the precision with which thoughts are expressed.

Although the above comments bring to light the difficulties, we human beings do a fairly good job of communicating with one another. Even so, incidents of miscommunication occur frequently. Those people who attach precise meanings to every word, who feel that meanings

intended are meanings received, and who are not able to select symbols well are apt to experience more than their share of miscommunication.

2.6 Adaptation
The difficulty of communicating was stressed in the communication process. And it is clear that communication is not a precise activity---that some degree of miscommunication is the rule rather than the exception. It is also clear that communication involves fitting the message to the readers mind--- that is, using words and concepts that the reader knows and understands. This approach to communication is called adaptation.

By adapting to our readers we mean using words and concepts that they understand. Adaptation involves first visualizing the readers---determine who they are, what they know about the subject, what are their educational levels, and how they think. Then, keep this information in mind, and tailor the writing to fit these readers.

In many business situations, adapting to our readers means writing on a level lower than our own. For example, sometimes we will need to communicate with people below our educational level. Or we may need to communicate with people of our educational level who simply do not know much about the subject of our message. On such occasions we will need to write for them at a lower level than we would normally use.1 Lets look at an example of adaptation.

1 William Zinsser, On Writing Well. New York: Harper & Row Publishers, Inc., 1976

There is a story told around Washington of plumber who wrote the Bureau of Standards that he had found hydrochloric acid good for cleaning clogged drains.

He got this response: The efficacy of hydrochloric acid is indisputable, but the corrosive residue is incompatible with metallic permanence.

Believing that these big words indicated that the Bureau agreed with him, the plumber wrote back telling how pleased he was that they liked his discovery.

The bureaucrat tried again: We cant assume responsibility for the production of toxic residue with hydrochloric acid and suggest alternative procedure.

The plumber was even more impressed. Again he expressed his appreciation to the Bureau for agreeing with him.

The bureaucrat got the message. He replied in words the plumber was certain to understand: Dont use hydrochloric acid. It will eat hell out of popes.

To illustrate, assume that we need to write a memorandum to a group of laborers. Our knowledge of them tells us that their vocabularies are limited. If we are to reach them, we will have to use the words they know. If we do not, we will not be likely to communicate. On the other hand, if we had to write the same message to a group of highly educated people, we would have a wider choice of words from which to choose. Obviously, these people have relatively larger vocabularies than the laborers. In either case, however, we would select words that are understood easily by the intended readers.

Lets look at the following paragraph from a company annual report illustrating this basic principle. The writer of the report apparently viewed the stockholder readers as people who are not well informed in finance:

Last year our companys total sales were $117,400,000, which was slightly higher than the $109,800,000 total for the year before. After deducting for all expenses, we had $4,593,000 left over for profits, compared with $2,830,000 for 1980. Because of these increased profits, we were able to increase your annual dividend payments per share from the 50 cents paid over the last ten years.

Chapter Three Linguistic Requirements for Effective Business Report Writing

Having understood the communication process, we can say that an effective business report will communicate well. Because its writing fits the readability of the reader. Thus, we need to take linguistic requirements into consideration.

3.1 Word Selection

In business report writing, we writers task is to produce in our readers mind the meanings formulated in our mind. To do this, we need to use written symbols of meaning (words). Thus, our task is largely one of selecting the right words that communicate best. The right words are those that have correct and clear meanings in the readers mind.

Selecting the right words depends on our ability to use language, our knowledge of the reader, and etc. But we should keep in mind one approach --- simplicity in writing. This approach is supported by three good reasons. First, many of us tend to write at too difficult a level. Instead of

being friendly, we become cold and stiff. We work to use big words and complex structures. Winston Churchill was referring to this tendency when he made his classic remark: Little men use big words; big men use little words. We would do well to follow the example set by this big man.

The second reason for simplification is that we writer usually know the subject of the message better than our readers. Thus they are not equally equipped to communicate on the matter. If we do not work at reducing the message to our readers level, communication will be difficult.

The third reason for simplifying writing is that convincing research supports this approach. According to the findings of some experts, writing slightly below the readers level of understanding communicates best.

3.1.1 Use Concrete Words

Successful business report writing is marked by specific words---words that form sharp and clear meaning in the readers brain. Such words are concrete. Concrete words are the opposite of abstract words, which are words of fuzzy and vague meanings. In general, concrete words stand for things readers can see, feel, taste, or smell. Concrete words hold interest, for they move directly into the readers experience. Because concrete words are best for holding interest, we should prefer them to abstract words wherever possible.

Generally speaking, concrete words are the short and familiar words. In addition to be more meaningful to readers, such words generally have more precise meaning than the other words. For example, the sentence is filled with long, unfamiliar words: The magnitude of the increment of profits was the predominant motivating factor in the decision. Written in shorter and more familiar words, the idea becomes more concrete: The size of the profit gained was the chief reason for the decision.

The effect of the concrete words can be easily illustrated by comparing the following examples:

Abstract

Concrete

a sizable profit a significant loss substantial amount

A 22 percent profit A 53-percent loss $4,549,000

in the near future good attendance record

by Thursday afternoon 100-percent attendance record

Now let us look at the following passage, and it is an example of some abstract wording.

It is imperative that the firm practice extreme conservatism in operating expenditures during the coming biennium. The firms past operating performance has been ineffectual for the reason that a preponderance of administrative assignments have been delegated to personnel who were ill equipped to perform in these capacities. Recently instituted administrative changes stressing experience in operating economies have rectified this condition.

This message written for concreteness might read like this:

We must cut operating expenses at least $3,000,000 during the year 2002-2003. Our $2,340,000 deficit for the year 2000-2001 was caused by the inexperience of our two chief administrators, Mr. Harrison and Mr. Douglas. We have replaced them with Ms. Duff and Mr. Levy, who have had 13 and 17 years, respectively, of successful experience in operations management.

3.1.2 Use Familiar Words

As a general rule, the familiar everyday words are the best for us to use. Familiar words refer to those we will use in face-to-face communication or the simple words. Of course, what is familiar to some people may be unfamiliar to others. This is where the principle of adaptation comes in. We will have to use our judgment in determining what is likely to be familiar to our readers.

Specifically, using familiar words means using the language that most of us use in normal conversation. We should avoid the stiff, more difficult words that do not communicate so precisely or quickly. For example, instead of using the more unfamiliar word endeavor, use try. Instead of using terminate, use end.

The communication advantages of familiar words over the formal complex ones are obvious from the following contrasting examples.

unfamiliar and complex

familiar and easy

accomplish..do ascertain.. find out contradict.deny dissimilar..unlike erroneous..wrong evinceshow encountermeet facilitate. help formulate.draw up

glutinous sticky gradientslope initial.. first incrementincrease institutebegin modificationchange optimum..best predisposition..tendency proximity.nearness reimburse.pay subsequentlylater substantiate..prove utilization.use ultimatelast

The following contrasting examples illustrate the communication advantages of familiar words over the less familiar ones.1

1 For some of these examples I am indebted to friends who gave them to me over the years.

a. The antiquated mechanisms were utilized for the experimentation. b. The old machines were used for the test.

a. Company operations for the preceding accounting period terminated with a substantial deficit. b. The company lost much money last year.

a. The conclusion ascertained from a perusal of pertinent data is that a lucrative market exists for the product. b. The data studies show that the product is in good demand.

3.1.3 Choose Short Words

Short words tend to communicate better than long words. Certainly there are exceptions. Some long words like automobile generally are well known; some short words like vie are understood only by a few. On the whole, however, word length and word difficulty clearly are related. Thus, we should concentrate on the short ones and use the long ones with caution. Use a long word only when we are reasonably certain that our readers know it. Though highly educated readers are likely to understand long words, yet the heavy proportion of long words interferes with communication of the message. Without question, the short-word versions communicate better.

A comparison between the five groups of sentences will show that sentence b in each group is better, for short words were used.

a. They acceded to the proposition to terminate business b. They agreed to quit business

a. b.

During the preceding year the company operated at a financial deficit. Last year the company lost money.

a.

This antiquated merchandising strategy is ineffectual in contemporary business operations.

b.

This old sales strategy wont work in todays business.

a. b.

Definitive action was effected subsequent to the reporting date. Final action was taken after the reporting date.

a.

The decision was predicated on the assumption that an abundance of monetary funds was forthcoming.

b.

The decision was based on the belief that there would be more money.

Here are other examples of shorter expressions, substitution of long wordings.

along the lines oflike at the present time..now in the meantime..meantime in accordance with..by in very few cases.seldom in view of the fact that.since, because in the event thatif in advance of.before in view of foregoing circumstances.therefore on the basis ofby subsequent to.after taking this factor into consideration..therefore with regard to.about with a view to to

3.1.4 Use Technical Words with Caution

Every field has its own technical language. Truck drivers have onelong enough, in fact, to fill a 36-page dictionary.1 To those in the field, much of the jargon is a part of the everyday working vocabulary. Certainly it is logical to use this jargon in writing to members of the field. Frequently, one such word will communicate a concept that would take dozens of other words to describe.

A problem comes about, however, when we use these words to people outside our field. Because these words are everyday words to us, we tend to forget that everyone does not know them. The result is miscommunication. We can avoid such miscommunication by using technical words with extreme caution, because business report is reader-centered. The purpose of the business report writing is not just to get a message down a paper, but to get it into the mind of the reader. Especially in longer reports, the boss pays more attention to the opening pages (title page, abstract, table of contents, and introduction), conclusions or recommendations. In these sections technical words should be carefully avoided. But in the detailed discussion following, technical words may be safely used. In fact, most writers on business reports agree that even when we are writing exclusively for the technically trained reader, it is best to use technical words only when we need it.1

1 Jean M. Walker, Truck Driving Dictionary and Glossary, American Trucking Association, Inc., Washington,
D.C., 1980

1 Gerald Cohen, A World Without People. Arizona State University, 1969

We can find many examples of misuse of technical writing. For instance, annuity has clear meaning to one in insurance. But a contract that guarantees an income for a specified period would have more meaning to uninformed outsiders. When a physician uses cerebral vascular accident to other physicians, they understand. Most people would get little meaning from the words, but they would understand a little stroke.

Lets look at the following sentence written by a physician.

It is a methodology error to attempt to interpret psychologically an organic symptom that is the end-result of an intermediary change of organic processes instead of trying to understand these vegetative nervous impulses in their relation to psychological factors that introduce a change of organic events resulting in an organic disturbance.

Undoubtedly the heavy proportion of technical terms also makes understanding difficult. The conclusion that may be drawn here is obvious. We may use technical terms in writing to fellow technicians, but we should use such words in moderation.

These words would be clear to a seasoned railroader:

Run that hog into four and tie on to that cut and snake it out of there. Then shake it out. After you finish that, pick up those two reefers on eight and cut them in behind the gondolas on ten. Thatll wrap up the hot shot. Then tie her together and blue flag her. 1

3.1.5 Prefer Active Verbs to Passive Ones

We should prefer the active to the passive voice. Active voice produces stronger, livelier writing. It places more emphasis on the action, and usually it saves words.

Active-voice verbs show their subject doing the action. They contrast with the dull passive forms that act on their subjects. The following contrasting sentences illustrate the distinction.

Active: The auditor inspected the books. Passive: The books were inspected by the auditor

Clearly, in the first sentence, the doer of the action acts, and the verb is short and clear. In the second sentence, the helping word were dulls the verb, and the doer of the action is relegated to a role in the prepositional phrase. The following sentences give additional proof of the superiority of active over passive voice.

Active:

Soft drink sales gained 49 percent.

1 John OHayre, Gobbledygook Has Gotta Go, Bureau of Land Management, Washington, D.C.,1966

Passive: A gain of 49 percent was recorder for soft drink sales.

Active:

The president completely reorganized the administration.

Passive: A complete reorganization of the administration was affected by the president.

Active:

Investigators believed that the new process is superior.

Passive: The new process is believed to be superior by the investigators.

The emphasis of active voice does not mean that passive voice should be eliminated or that it is incorrect. It has its place, and it certainly is correct. The fact is that passive voice is a poor choice for reports because it slows the reader down in recognizing the pattern of a sentence. When the mind perceives an actpaying a bill, for exampleit visualizes a person in the act of paying the bill. It does not visualize the bill being paid. To process the passive into active, the reader must reverse the pattern. This processing action is almost instantaneous, of course, and the occasional use of passive voice creates no great loss of time. But when it appears over and over again in the report, the conversion time begins to build up. And if no performer is ever identified, the reader enters a world there no one does anything: thing just happen. That mystification coupled with wasted time, finally leads to frustration. Passive verbs occur in Time magazine only about 10 to 12 percent of the time. 1

1 Thomas A. Sherman, Modern Technical Writing. Prentice-Hill Inc., 1982

As a consequence, in revising our report, change as many verbs from passive to active voice as we can. Doing so helps our readers. To summarize, using active voice verbs saves both words and time because it is more natural and because it enables readers to recognize sentence patterns swiftly.

3.1.6 Avoid Overuse of Camouflaged Verbs

When we camouflage a verb, we take the verb describing the action in a sentence and change it into a noun. Then we have to add action words. For example, suppose we want to write a sentence in which eliminate is the action to be expressed. We change eliminate into its noun form, elimination. Now in order to have a sentence, we must add action wordsperhaps was effected.

Our sentence would then be something like this: Elimination of the surplus was effected by the staff. We could have avoided the camouflaged construction with a sentence using the word eliminate: The staff eliminate the surplus.

Here are some additional examples. We could take the good action word cancel and make it into a noun, cancellation. Then we would have to say something like to effect a cancellation in order to communicate the action desired. So it would be with these examples:

action verbs

Noun form

Wording of camouflaged verb make an acquisition

acquire.. acquisition

appearappearance apply..application discussdiscussion investigateinvestigation record.recording liquidate.liquidation reconcile.reconciliation

make an appearance make an application have a discussion make an investigation make a recording effect a liquidation make a cancellation

Note the difference in overall effect in the contrasting sentences:

a. We must bring about a reconciliation of our differences. ( camouflaged verb) b. We must reconcile our differences. (clear verb form)

From these illustrations we can see that camouflaged words made from the verbs are abstract nouns. We have discussed the point that we prefer the concrete to the abstract words. Second, camouflaged wordings frequently require passive voice. And the active voice is preferable.

3.1.7 Avoid Misplacing Modifiers

Modifiers are the describing words that help us to clarify the meaning of what we write. For example, modifiers help us to describe the subject in a sentence, to tell how the action of the sentence took place, and to tell our reader where or when something occurred.

Careful use of modifiers makes our meaning clearer and enables us to express our ideas in color. But careless use of modifiers results in misunderstanding and hard-to-read sentences.

Likewise, if we do not use modifiers at all, our sentences may be uninteresting and colorless, and if we use too many modifiers, our sentences may be wordy and confusing.

The basic principle for using modifiers is simple to put them as close as possible to the word or words they are modifying. Naturally, if we want to discuss a potential market, we will want potential to appear right before market; we will not put the modifier in some distant part of the sentence.

Examples: We have ordered a hundred cupcakes for the children dipped in chocolate. (wrong: dipped in chocolate modifiers cupcakes, not children) We have ordered a hundred cupcakes dipped in chocolate for the children. (poor)

We have ordered for the children a hundred cupcakes dipped in chocolate. (better)

3.2 Sentence Construction

As we have known, choosing the right words is basic to clear communication. Equally basic is the task of arranging the words into sentences that communicate clearly. Just as with words, constructing clear sentences involves adaptation. That is, it involves fitting sentences to the minds of the intended readers.

Fitting sentences to the minds of readers requires the same kind of analysis of the readers. We simply need to study our readers to find out how we should communicate with them. We should especially consider their knowledge of the subject of the report, their education, and their intelligence. Then, with this information in mind, we should construct the sentences that are likely to communicate best with them.

As a general rule, the more educated and intelligent our readers are, the better they are to understand messages. Thus, in writing to the lower levels, we should use the simpler sentence designsthose easier to understand. In writing to the higher levels, we can use more complex designs.

In adapting sentences, we should aim a little below the level of our reader. Research tells us that writing communicates best when it does not tax mind. Thus some degree of simplification is best for all readers.

3.2.1 Write Short Sentences

Writing the simpler, more understandable sentences largely involves writing short sentences. The more words and the more relationships in a sentence, the greater is the possibility for misunderstanding. Apparently, the mind can hold only so much information at one time. Thus, to give it too much information is to cause miscommunication

The emphasis on short sentences does not mean that occasionally we may not use long sentences. We may, and we should if we can construct them clearly. Longer sentences sometimes are useful in subordinating information. Sometimes the information needed to complete a thought requires a long sentence.

Writing in simple, short sentences involves two basic techniques. First is the technique of limiting sentence content; second is the technique of expressing thoughts in fewer words, that is, of economizing the words used.

Limiting Sentence Content

Limiting sentence content is largely a matter of mentally selecting the thought units and making separate sentences of most of them. Sometimes, of course, we should combine thoughts into one sentence. But we should do this only when we have good reason to do so. The advantage of following this practice is evident from the following contrasting sentences.

a. Regardless of their seniority or union affiliation, all employees who hope to be promoted are expected to continue their education rather by enrolling in the special courses to be offered by the company, which are scheduled to be given after working hours beginning next Wednesday, or by taking approved correspondence courses selected from a list which may be seen in the training office. (long and hard to understand)

b. Regardless of their seniority or union affiliation, all employees who hope to be promoted are expected to continue their education in either of two ways. 1. They may enroll in special courses to be given by the company. 2. They may take approved correspondence courses selected in the training office. (short and clear)

a. Some authorities in personnel administration object to expanding normal salary ranges to include a trainee rate because they fear that probationers may be kept at the minimum rate longer than is warranted through oversight or prejudice and because they fear that it would encourage the spread from the minimum to maximum rate range. (long and hard to understand)

b. Some authorities in personnel administration object to expanding the normal salary range to include a trainee rate for two reasons. First, they fear that probationers may be kept at the minimum rate longer than is warranted, through oversight or prejudice, Second, they fear that it would, in effect, increase the spread from the minimum to the maximum rate range. (short and clear)

Without question, the longer sentences are difficult to understand. The obvious explanation is the length of the sentence. So many words and relationships are in this one unit that they confuse the mind. The result is fuzzy communication at bestcomplete miscommunication at worst. Clearly, the shorter versions are easy to understand. They fit into the mind better. They give more emphasis to content and to organization of the subject matter.

Economizing on Words
Economizing on words largely involves consciously looking for shorter ways of expressing things. In general, the shorter wordings not only save our readers time, but also make reading more interesting.

Cluttering phrases
Our language is cluttered with numerous phrases that are best replaced by shorter expressions. Although the shorter forms may save only a word or two here and there, the little saving over a long piece of writing can be significant. The following are contrasting pairs of expressions:

Cluttering phrase

shorter substitution

along the lines of

like

for the purpose of for the reason that in accordance with in very few cases on the occasion of with regard to

for because, since by seldom on about

Lets compare the following three pairs of sentences:

a. b.

In the event that payment is not made by January, operations will cease. If payment is not made by January, operations will cease.

a. b.

In spite of the fact that they received help, they failed to exceed to quota. Even though they received help, they failed to exceed the quota.

a.

The invoice was in the amount of $30,000.

b.

The invoice was for $30,000.

Surplus words
To write economically, we need to eliminate words that add nothing to the sentence meaning. We often use extra and meaningless words as a matter of habit. Sometimes eliminating the surplus words requires recasting the sentence. But sometimes they can just be left out. Here are some examples of surplus wording from a business report: a. It will be noted that the records for the past years show a steady increase in special appropriations. b. The records for past years show a steady increase in special appropriations.

a.

There are four rules that should be observed.

b. Four rules should be observed.

a.

In addition to these defects, numerous other defects mar the operating procedure.

b. Numerous other defects mar the operating procedure.

a. b.

By the keeping of production records, they found the error. By keeping production records, they found the error.

a.

I am prepared to report to the effect that sales increased.

b. I am prepared to report that sales increased.

Obviously, by eliminating the surplus words, sentence b. in each pair is strong, without loss of meaning.

Eliminate redundancies
Most rough drafts are wordier than they should be because they resemble the way we think and speak. But remember that every unnecessary word wastes a little of our readers time. And wordy writing is boring. If we dont want our efforts to end up in the readers wastebasket, we should make sure the writing is concise.

Our goal is not to impress people with the number of words we can write; our goal is simply to get our message across a reader. To avoid using further words, lets see how we can do something to cut the flab from the sentences.

The following are some common phrases in our language, which are redundant. We should stop to think about the words that roll onto our page.

REDUNDANT..CONCISE advance planning brief in length collect together desirable benefits important essentials merge together past history planning brief collect benefits essentials merge history

The tip for us business report writers is: Dont bury an idea in several unnecessary words. Though the temptation to say things twice is often hard to fight, we should cut out extra words that add length and no real information.1

3.2.2 Design Effective Sentences

Writing sentences also involves giving the right emphasis to content. Any written business communication contains a number of items of information, not all equally important. Some are very important, such as a conclusion in a report or the objective in a letter. Some are relatively unimportant. Our task as report writer is to determine the importance of each item and then to form our sentences to communicate this importance.

1Warren L. Thomas, Technical Writing. California: Wadsworth Publishing Co., 1988

Sentence length affects emphasis. Short, simple sentences carry more emphasis than long ones. The short ones stand out and call attention to their contents. Thus the reader gets one message without the interference of related or supporting information.

Longer sentences give less emphasis to their contents. When two or more ideas are in one sentence, the ideas share emphasis. If the two ideas are presented equally (in independent clause, for example), they get about equal emphasis. But if they are not presented equally (for example, in an independent and a dependent clause), one gets more emphasis than the other.

For instance, we have two items of information to write. One is that the company lost money last year. The other is that its sales reached a record of high volume. We could present the information in at least three ways.

The company lost money last year. The loss occurred in spite of record sales.

Although the company enjoyed record sales last year, it lost money.

The company enjoyed record sales last year, although it lost money.

Which sentence we would use depends on how much emphasis each item deserves. We need to think the matter through and follow our best judgment. But the point is clear: our choice of arrangement makes a difference.

3.2.3 Give the Sentence Unity

Good sentences must have unity. For a sentence to have unity, all of its parts must combine to form one clear thought. In other words, everything that is put together as a sentence should have a good reason for being together. Violations of unity in sentence construction fall into three categories: (1) unrelated ideas, (2) excessive details and (3) illogical constructions.

Unrelated ideas
Placing unrelated ideas in a sentence is the most obvious violation of unity. Of course, putting two or more ideas in a sentence is not grammatically wrong. But the ideas must have a reason for being together. They must combine to complete the single goal of the sentence. It is not enough that the ideas just are on the same subject.

There are three basic ways of giving unity to sentences that contain seemingly unrelated ideas. 1. We can put the ideas in separate sentences. 2. We can make one of the ideas subordinate to the other. 3. We can add words that show how the ideas are related.

The following contrasting pairs of sentences illustrate the technique:

a.

Our territory is the southern half of the state, and our sales people cant cover it thoroughly. ( unrelated )

b.

Our territory is the southern half of the state. Our sales people cant cover it thoroughly. (improved)

a.

Operation of the press is simple. But no machine will work well unless it is maintained. (unrelated)

b.

Operation of the press is simple; but, like any machine, it will not work well unless it is maintained. (improved)

a.

We concentrate on energy-saving products, and 70 percent of our business is from them. (unrelated)

b.

As a result of our concentration on energy-saving products, 70 percent of our business comes from them. (improved)

Excessive details

Putting too much detail into one sentence tends to hide the central thought. If the detail is important, it is better to put it in a separate sentence. For long sentences definitely lead to lack of unity, as illustrated in the following contrasting sentences:

We have attempted to trace the Ply-technology insulation that you ordered from us October 1, and about which you inquired in your October10th letter, but we have not yet been able to locate it, although we are sending you a rush shipment immediately. (Excessive detail)

We are sending you a rush shipment of Ply-technology insulation immediately. Following your October 10th inquiry, we attempted to trace your October 1st order. We were unable to locate it. ( Improved)

Illogical constructions
Illogical constructions may destroy sentence unity. Primarily, illogical constructions result from illogical thinking. Although illogical thinking is too complex here, a few examples of this violation will acquaint us with the possibilities involved.

First we cut prices, and then quality was reduced. The sentence contains two main thoughts both in correct clauses. But one clause is in active voice ( we cut ); the other is in passive voice ( quality was reduced )

Unity can be given by making both clauses active, as in this example: First we cut prices, and then we reduced quality.

Here is another example: Job rotation is when you train people by moving them from job to job.

Revised for good logic the sentence might be read like this: Job rotation is a training method involving moving people from job to job.

3.2.4 Write Sentences for Variety

We all know the clich about the spice of life. Well, variety certainly adds spice to any piece of writing. 1We should not let our writing become monotonous just because we are writing a business report.

The key to sentence variety is subordination. We can inject secondary ideas into our sentences in a multitude of ways. Once we recognize the main point of our sentences, we should be able to incorporate the less important ideas into phrases or dependent clauses. And the following ways to subordinate material will help to add variety to our sentences and give proper emphasis to the points we are conveying.

1 1998

For example, we have many versions of the sentences: John is a manager. John works ten hours a day. John is the companys best salesman.

a.

John, who is the companys best salesman, works ten hours a day. (Dependent clause inside an independent clause )

b. John, the companys best salesman, works ten hours a day. (Appositive in the independent clause) c. Since he works ten hours a day, John is the companys best salesman. (Dependent clause + independent clause) d. Working ten hours a day, John is the companys best salesman. (Modifying phrase+ independent clause)

3.3 Paragraph Building

Paragraphing is also important to clear communication. Paragraphs show the reader where topics begin and end, thus, helping to organize the information in the mind. Paragraphing helps to make the ideas stand out.

3.3.1 Give the Paragraph Unity

Unity is the primary requirement of the paragraph. When applied to paragraph structure, unity means that the paragraph builds around a single topic or idea. Thus, all that we include in a paragraph should develop this topic or idea. When we finished the paragraph, we should have no difficulty in answering what the paragraph concerns.

Unity is not always easy to determine. All of a report, for example, may deal with a single topic and therefore have unity. The same could be said for each major division of the report as well as for the lesser subdivisions. Paragraph unity, however, concerns smaller units than theseusually the lowest level of a detailed outline. That is, in reports written with detailed outlines, each paragraph may well cover one of the lowest outline captions. In any event, one good test of a paragraph is to reduce its content to a single statement. If this statement does not cover the paragraph content, unity is not likely to be there.

A violation of unity is illustrated in the following paragraph from an application letter.

At the University I studied all the basic accounting courses as well as specialized courses in petroleum, fiduciary, and systems. I also took specialized coursework in the behavioral areas, with emphasis on human relations. Realizing the value of human relations in business, I also actively participated in some social organizations. I selected my elective coursework to round out my general business education. Among my electives were courses in investments, advanced business report writing, financial policy, and forecasting. A glance at my resume will show you the additional courses that round out my raining.

As the goal of the paragraph is to present a summary of the applicants coursework, all the sentences should pertain to coursework. By shifting to personal qualities, the third sentence violates paragraph unity. Taking this one sentence out would correct the fault.

3.3.2 Keep the Paragraph Short

As discussed earlier, paragraphs help the reader to follow the organization plan of the paper. Writing shorter paragraphs points out more of the details of the organization plan. In addition, writing marked by short paragraphs is inviting to the eye. People read writing that gives them frequent breaks more easily than unbroken writing, which is easily proved by illustration. A glance at the figure below shows the effect of paragraph length.

..

..

 .. .. ..

Figure one re two

Figu

Figure 1 is a report written with long paragraphs. Its pages are solid with type. Figure 2 is a report that has short paragraphs, thus providing frequent rest stops throughout. No doubt we would prefer the one with short paragraphs. It is more inviting, and it appears to be less difficult. Perhaps the difference is largely psychological, but it is a very real difference.

Just how long a paragraph should be, of course, depends on the topic. Some topics are short, some are long, and others are in between. Even so, this general guide can be given on paragraph length: Most well-organized and well-paragraphed reports may have paragraphs that average about eight to ten lines. Some good paragraphs may be quite shorteven a single line. And some may be well above the eight to ten averagely.1

A good rule to follow is to question the unity of all long paragraphs, say those over 12 lines. After looking over the paragraph, we find more than one topic. When we do, we should make each topic into a separate paragraph.

3.3.3 Make Good Use of Topic Sentences

One good way of organizing paragraphs is to use topic sentences. The topic sentence expresses the main idea of paragraph, and the remaining sentences build around and support it. In a sense, the topic sentence serves as headline for the paragraph, and all the other sentences supply the story.

1 Ruggiero, Vincent Ryan, The Art of Writing. California: Alfred Publishing Co.,1981

Not every good paragraph must have a topic sentence. Some, for example, serve to introduce ideas, to relate succeeding items, or to present an assortment of facts that lead to no conclusion. The central thought of such paragraphs is difficult to put into a single sentence. Even so, we should use topic sentence whenever we can. We should use them especially in writing reports in which we must discuss a number of topics and subtopics. Using topic sentences forces us to find the central idea of each paragraph. Another advantage is that it helps to given us a check for paragraph unity.

How a topic sentence should fit into a paragraph depends primarily on the subject matter and we writers plan. Some subject matter develops best by first presenting details and ending with a conclusion or summary statement (the topic sentence). Others develop best by beginning with the summary or concluding statement. Other possible arrangements exist.

Topic sentence at the beginning

The most common of all paragraph plans begins with the topic sentence and follows with the supporting sentences. As this arrangement fits most units of business information, we should find it useful. In fact, appropriate business information is that one companys writing manual suggests that this arrangement be used for virtually all paragraphs. As illustrated in the following paragraph, the plan has merit.

A majority of the economists consulted think that business activity will drop during the first quarter of next year. Of the 147 economists interviewed, 20 percent looked for continued increases in business activities; and 13 percent anticipated little or no change from the present

high level. The remaining 67 percent liked for a recession. Of this group, nearly all believed the down curve would occur during the first quarter of the year.

Topic sentence at the end

The second most common paragraph arrangement places the topic sentence at the end, usually as a conclusion. Take the following short passage as an example:

The significant role of inventories in the economic picture should not be overlooked. At present, inventories represent 4 months supply. Their dollar value is the highest in history. If considered in relation to increased sales, however, they are not excessive. In fact, they are well within the range generally believed to be safe. Thus, inventories are not likely to cause a downward swing in the economy

The passage first presented the supporting details, and from these details they lead the readers to the conclusion.

Topic sentence within the paragraph

This arrangement is rarely used, and usually for good reason. It does not emphasize the topic sentence, and usually the topic sentence deserves emphasis. Even so, sometimes we can justify using this arrangement for special effect, as in this example:

Numerous materials have been used in manufacturing this part. And many have shown quite satisfactory results. Material 447, however, is superior to them all. Built with material 447, the part is almost twice as strong as when built with the next best material. Also, it is three ounces lighter. Most important, it is cheaper than any of the other products. (topic sentence is underlined)

Leaving out unnecessary details

In writing paragraph we should include only information we need. The chances are that we have more information than we need. Thus, a part of our communication task involves selecting what we need and dropping what we do not need.

What we need, of course, is a matter of judgment. We can judge best by putting ourselves in the readers place. Ask ourselves questions such as these: How will the information be used? What will be used? What will not be used? Then make the decisions. If we follow this procedure, probably we will leave out much that we originally intended to use.

For example, wed better not write: As a matter of fact, the X-210 copier is not really the kind of machine the company needs, since the X-200 has the capability of meeting virtually all of our needs We d better write:

We do not need the X-210 since the X-200 meets our needs.

3.3.4 Move the Paragraph Forward

Good report writing has movement. Movement is the writing quality that takes the reader in definite and logical steps toward the goal without side trips and backward shifts. The progress is steadily forward, namely, step by step. The sentences move step by step to achieve the paragraph goal, and the paragraphs move step by step to achieve the report goal.

Perhaps movement is best explained by examples. The following paragraph is from the annual report of The Walt Disney Company:

There are two principal attributes that make a brand powerful from a business perspective. It must be unique and it must be relevant. Uniqueness is the quality that determines the ability to use the brand to differentiate one's products. In this sense, the Disney brand is truly unique. And ESPN, through considerable effort and investment, has also established its uniqueness despite the tough competition in the sports programming business. However, to be commercially powerful, a brand must also be relevant to consumers. Clearly, both Disney and ESPN pass this test. Disney is about family, fun and fantasy. ESPN embodies the edgy and irreverent excitement of sports.

The flow of thought in the preceding paragraph is orderly. The first sentence sets up the paragraph structure and the parts of the structure follow.

3.3.5 Use Transitional Devices

When we have put together our supporting material and our topic sentence, our paragraph may still be lacking one major element: a flow between ideas. We need transitions from one sentence to the next and transitions between paragraphs. When transitions are lacking, readers sense that a paragraph is choppy or disorganized.

One rule of thumb to consider while writing and organizing paragraphs is that we do not want to confuse our readers. Instead, we should be setting up road sign along the way, telling our readers that we are adding materials, providing a slightly different perspective, moving on in time, or giving examples. The road sign may consist of transitional words or phrases, pronouns, or echoes. 1

One of the easiest ways to make transitions is to add transitional words. The following is the opening paragraph of a marketing report for a canned goods company.

I am the product manager of the Food Service Division. I was instructed by John Carson to evaluate our Lite Fruit marketing strategy. I have analyzed the effect of the marketing campaign on the division. The campaign has run at a loss for two years. I studied the divisions recent costincome data and consumer-trend reports. I recommend continuing the Lite Fruit campaign. I urge increasing the price of Lite Fruit and directing a large portion of the advertising budget to male consumers.

1 1998

The information in this paragraph is acceptable for the beginning of report. And the problem with the paragraph is that the writer does not provide transitional words to move us from one point to another. A few helpful words will make the paragraph much more accessible and effective.

John Carson instructed me, as product manager of the Food Service Division, to evaluate our Lite Fruit marketing strategy. When I analyzed the effect of the marketing campaign on the division, I found the campaign had run at a loss or two years. To determine the root of the problem, I studied the divisions recent cost-income data and consumer-trend reports. Now that I have completed my report, I recommend continuing the Lite Fruit campaign, increasing the price of Lite Fruit, and directing a large portion of the advertising budget to male consumers.

The few words added to these sentences provide a chronological sense as well as a logical sequence to the paragraph. We can also make transitions between paragraphs by using a pronoun referring to a noun in the previous sentence.

Chapter Four Steps in Writing a Business Report

In the previous chapters we discussed the definition, parts and qualities of a successful business report, all of which will help us write an effective business report. In this chapter, we will talk about the process in writing a business report.

4.1 Define the Problem

The first step is to analyze the problem involved and know the purpose of our report. Try to write our purpose in one concise, clear sentence. This step often can be the toughest in the entire report-writing process.

Our statement of the problem puts a verbal fence around the situation and insures, to some degree, that the planning, research, conclusions, recommendations, and decisions will remain within the fenced area. In many situations, the problem can be stated in a paragraph or two. However, when investigating more complex problems or when reporting on problems with which the reader of the report is unfamiliar, it may be necessary to provide more information in stating the problem.

The central purpose of many business reports often is to help the receiver solve a problem and/or make a decision. For example, if our firm is experiencing too great a turnover of employees, that s a problem. The purpose of the report may be to find out what causes the high turnover and how to keep the employees after they have been hired.

4.2 Analyze the Reader

Visualizing our readers and their needs is an extremely important step in business report writing. We need to take the following points into consideration. Who wants this report? Who will read it? How much detail do they prefer? What is the reader s point of view? Experience? Knowledge? Will the report be sent to several or perhaps hundreds of persons at the same time? Will it be passed on from the primary readers to secondary readers? And so on.

If our report goes, say, to our department supervisor, we can use technical terms and abbreviations used in our area. But if it is routed to other departments within our firm or if it goes to someone outside the firm, or to our stockholders, our language may have to be non-technical, with intricate explanations.

4.3 Collect Information

With the problem analyzed, we know the objective. We know, also, what information we will need to achieve the objective. Next, we must make careful plans for collecting the information needed.

In this task we may use secondary research, or we may use a form of primary research. Secondary research through published materials. It is research through materials that someone else has uncoveredperiodicals, brochures, and such.

Primary research, as the term implies, is research that uncovers findings firsthand. It is originating research. That is, it brings about new findings-- findings that were hitherto unknown. Logically we use primary research when secondary information on a subject is not available.

4.4 Arrange and Interpret Information

After gathering the information we need, the information may be in various states of order. If it has been collected through an orderly form of bibliographical research, the information is arranged by like subjects and is likely to be ready for interpretation and application to the problem. Information collected through primary research, however, is likely to need classifying, and editing.

Classifying data simply means grouping them by some logical basis, such as time, quantity, and place. In primary research problems, the plan for classifying usually precedes the work of editing and tabulating.

Editing generally involves inspecting all the data collected; looking for possible errors, inconsistencies, and omissions; making corrections whenever possible; and generally preparing the forms of tabulation.

Because interpretation is a mental process, the ability to interpret is closely correlated with our mental capability. And like most mental functions, interpretation is improved with knowledge. Normally we will gain interpretation knowledge through experience. But such knowledge may

also be acquired from a review of the fundamentals of interpretationfundamentals that ordinarily we would learn through experience.

4.5 Construct the Outline

The report outline, of course, is the plan for the writing task that follows. It is to us writers what the blueprint is to the construction engineer or what the pattern is to the dressmaker. In addition to serving as a guide, the outline compels us to think before writing. And when we think, the writing is likely to be clear.

Although this plan may be either written or mental, a written form should be used in all but the shortest of problems. In long reports, where tables of contents are needed, the outline forms the basis of this table. Also, in most long reports, and even in some short ones, the outline topics may serve as guides to the reader when placed within the report text as captions to the paragraphs of writing they cover.

4.6 Write the Draft

The draft is written to construct the general shape of the report. At this point we write down facts and ideas with the framework of the outline and leave behind us the spelling, grammar and other mechanical errors. We will correct them when revising the report. The draft of the report will tell the reader what is to come in the final report.

4.7 Revise the Draft

Most of us should face the fact that writing is not an easy job. Especially when complicated ideas are included in a business report, there is no doubt we must work on the report over more than once. The revision may result in more words, but more often, in other improvements as well. One authority, when asked the secret of good writing, replied, Revise, revise, revise. 1

In revising the report, wed better ask ourselves the following questions.

1. Did we organize our message in a logical, forceful, and forward-flowing manner, from sentence to sentence and from paragraph to paragraph? 2. Did we express our thoughts accurately, completely and concisely in correct and plain English? 3. Is all the essential information included?

Conclusion
1Wilcox, Communication at Work. Houghton Mufflin Company,1977

Good business report writers always receive promotion, because they impress their superiors with their ability to communicate with others. While written communication plays a role at least as important as, if not more important than, the oral channel, the business report distinguishes itself from other varieties of writing on account of its particular function and requirements. Thus, the ability to write good business reports is a requisite for business advancement. To write an effective business report, one is demanded of not only skills shared by other forms of writing, but also a set of principles serving its unique purposes.

The first chapter of this thesis presents some general but important knowledge of the business report, and a description of the essential qualities for effectiveness. The second chapter covers the inherent relation between communication and business communication. And the last chapter deals with the step in writing a business report.

Regarding the components of a business report, this thesis presents a comprehensive study of their respective roles. While the significance of the report body is obvious, the introduction and the ending, though generally taking up only a small space, receive due treatment as elements that catch the readers attention.

The focus of my thesis is on the various linguistic devices, through which business report writers should strive to achieve their targets For example, word selection, which involves using concrete, familiar, and short words, is the stone that kills two birds at once. It plays a vital role in making the business report both interesting and clear. Similarly, simple and vivid language is applied and active voice is preferred. Furthermore, short sentences and paragraphs with unity and good transition ensure the flow of thoughts, while variety in sentence length as well as change in

emphasis makes the business report stand out and holds the readers attention from beginning to end.

Since business report writing has always been an area that interests me, I hope in the future I will have the chance to make a further study of this subject and to explore into domains yet unknown to me.

Bibliography

1. Brusaw / Gerald J. Alred / Walter E. Oliu, Handbook of Technical Writing. New York: St. Martins Press, 1982 2. Gerald Cohen, A world Without People. Arizona State University, 1969 3. Herta O. Murphy, Effective Business Communications. New York: Mcgraw-Hill Inc., 1980 4. H.G. Widdowson, Teaching Language as Communication. Oxford University Press.1996 5. Kesselman, Judi R. Good Writing. New York: Franklynn Watts, 1981

6.

Lilian O. Feinberg, Applied Business Communication. California: Alfred Publishing Co., 1982

7. L. Sue Baugh / Maridell Fryar / David Thomas, Handbook for Business Writing. Lincolnwood: National Textbook Company. 8. Norman B. Sigband / David N. Bateman, Communicating in Business. Scott, Foresman and Company. 1985 9. Raymond U. Lesikar, Report Writing for Business. Illinois: Richard D. Irwin, Inc., 1981 10. Ruggiero, Vincent Ryan, The Art of Writing. California: Alfred Publishing Co., 1981 11. Roger P. Wilcox, Communication at Work. Boston: Houghton Mifflin Company, 1977 12. Quible K. Zane, Introduction to Business Communication. New Jersey: West Publishing Co., 1981 13. Salvatoore J. Iacone, Modern Business Report Writing. New York: Macmillan Publishing Company. 1985

14. Thomas A. Sherman, Modern Technical Writing. New Jersey: Prentice-Hill Inc., 1982 15. Warren L. Thomas, Technical Writing. California: Wadsworth Publishing Co., 1988 16. William H. Wood, Clear Writing. New York: St. Martins Press, 1982

17. William Zinsser, On Writing Well. New York: Harper & Row, Publishers, Inc., 1976 18. William W. Wilmot, Selectivity in Communication. New York: John Wiley & Sons, Inc., 1983 19. , 1998 20. 1997