Connecting Church & Home 2013 Tim Kimmel Published by Randall House 114 Bush Road Nashville, TN 37217

7 All rights reserved. No part of this publication may be reproduced, stored in a retrieval system, or transmitted in any form or by any meanselectronic, mechanical, photocopy, recording, or any other meansexcept for brief quotation in critical reviews, without the prior permission of the publisher. All Scripture quotations, unless otherwise indicated, are taken from The HOLY BIBLE, NEW INTERNATIONAL VERSION. NIV. Copyright 1973, 1978, 1984, 2011 by Biblica. Inc. All rights reserved worldwide. Used by permission. All rights reserved. ISBN 978-0-8926-5679-0 Printed in the United States of America

ACKNOWLEDGEMENTS

ost people reading a book skip this page. Its too bad. Lives arent solo acts and stories dont happen in vacuums. There are always key people and entities surrounding a writer that not only enable his words to appear on a page, but help those words have richer meaning. I owe a ton of thanks to Steve and Barbara Uhlmann for their cabin in the mountains and to Steve and PollyAnna Stephens for their home on the range. They provided the keys and quiet that was needed to move this book from my head to your hands. Scottsdale Bible Church doesnt just give lip service to the transforming power of Gods grace; they want it to permeate their entire culture. They have been a key proving ground for the concepts of this book. I want to especially thank the great folks that met so often, prayed so passionately, and worked so hard to develop and rene the Family Ministry Map: Michael & Chris Tooker, Peter & Julie Bartolini, David & Julie Dickerson, Mark & Robin Snyder, Matt & Janna Everroad, and Trevor & Haley Strawhecker. And I want to give a special shout out to John Trent who was also part of that group. JT is one of the best examples of consistent encouragement Ive ever known. Kory Schuknecht played a huge role in the development of the grace-based philosophy of families. But even more, hes now lighting the way for thousands of families who want to make Gods grace the DNA of their relationships.

Then theres Darcythe great synthesizer of some of the most profound features of Gods love. If you had this book tested for ngerprints, hers would be all over it. Ive thoroughly enjoyed doing our personal family ministry together with this amazing lady. Theres a reason why Gods grace cant be embraced in the abstract; its because it was delivered in person, on a cross, by the Son of God. And its to Him that I offer the ultimate acknowledgement and glory.

IV

DEDICATION

TO

KYLER WILLIAM KIMMEL

&
HAYES DAVIS KIMMEL

YOUNG GUNS OF A GREAT NEW FAMILY MINISTRY.

TABLE OF CONTENTS
1 CHURCH FAMILY MINISTRY: SUB-CONTRACTED PARENTHOOD . . . . . . . . . 1

2 HOMEGROWN FAITH . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . 13 3 A PLAN THAT WORKS . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . 25 4 THE PLACE OF GRACE . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . 37 5 PAPER NAPKIN FAMILY MINISTRY . . . . . . . . . . . 49 6 GRACE-BASED FAMILIES; GRACE-BASED
FAMILY MINISTRIES . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . 61

7 A GRACE FOR ALL SEASONS . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . 83 8 A FAMILY MINISTRIES MANDATE . . . . . . . . . . . . 95 9 THE HAPPIEST MOST GRACIOUS PLACE
ON EARTH . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . 107

10 PORCH LIGHTS . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . 129

CHAPTER 1

CHURCH FAMILY MINISTRY: SUB-CONTRACTED PARENTHOOD

his is a book about starting at the right place. Some prefer to focus on the path we take or the destination we ultimately reach. Obviously these deserve their place in the sunand well weigh in on them before were done. But where we startits the more critical point. It denes our journeys as well as our objectives: whether its raising a family, maintaining friendships, making a living or wasting time, etc. And it denitely has the dening impact on how parents and churches team up to produce a new generation of passionate followers of Jesus. Thats why I want to begin with a denition, two, in fact. Since just about every word in the dictionary has multiple ways of being described, its obvious that these denitions dont cover the totality of these two words. But they clearly help us dial in on the bigger discussion were going to have in this book.
FAMILY: THE DOMESTIC CHURCH

CHURCH: A GATHERING OF DOMESTIC CHURCHES

Obviously some people appear to be ying solo when they show up for church. We like to call them singles but thats really an illusion. No one is truly single. Everyone is part of a family,

regardless of how healthy it is (or was). Most of us that show up for church walk from the parking lot with the people we live with throughout the week. We represent the families that make up the shared body of our churches. This book is about how a family leverages its collective assets to raise the spiritual stock value of its local church . . . and how a local church leverages its collective assets to raise the spiritual stock value of its familiesand both of these done with the combined goal of enhancing Gods power and presence within our culture. Theres a reason why it would be nice if both families and churches got on the same page. We need each other. More important, God always expected us to. In fact, we were designed to operate in rhythm like dancers. Families and churches are the only two cradle-to-grave organisms in a Christian worldview. But busy churches and hurried families have gotten their respective bodies operating more like break dancers than as dance partners. For most families, church is a line item on their schedules. Thats fair, I guess. There are a lot of food, clothing, shelter, health, education, and welfare priorities that ll most of the other lines. And for most churches, families, though highly valued, equally show up as a line item on its agenda. Thats understandable, I guess. There are lots of evangelism, discipleship, marrying, burying, and caring for the hurting priorities that ll most of its other lines. These other priorities cause these two to intersect occasionally with each other. Before you nish this book, I hope to show you how a deliberate partnership between families and churches will do more to enhance and fulll these other priorities (line items) than any other efforts either of them can make individually. I dont see the church as an entity having absolute authority
2