VOLUME TWO

0 3 . 0 7.13

ISSUE T E N

"If the system to kick authority in the teeth, public don't well use both feet." "'Causeyou're goingthrives on ignorance/What the you might as know, they can't reject" Keith Richards Subhumans (UK)

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LECTOR'S COVER! OM-ON-A-DOCK COL SOCCER-M

| Live Grappling | Va m p i re s

Errors and Omissions

P L U S : 7 D AY N E W B R A U N F E L S / S A N M A R C O S L I V E M U S I C G U I D E

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STAFF / CONTACT Publisher/Editor-in-Chief Mike Reynolds Director of Distribution Chase Cochran Art Director Kayla Wallace Editorial: news@txcitizen.com Advertising: sales@txcitizen.com Distribution: distribution@txcitizen.com

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Around & About Diversions

Were All In lives up to its name at the Junior Livestock show! Karaoke, trivia, pool tourneys, and such.

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The Beer Hunter

When Mitchell drinks, we all learn something.

Located in the heart of downtown New Braunfels, the Historic Faust Hotel & Brewing Company is a onestop destination offering a variety of House Brews, Full Bar and Tapas-Style Menu, and Redesigned Guestrooms, Suites, and Event Center, which feature 1920s Art Deco design while incorporating modern amenities.

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Errors and Omissions Errors: In last weeks issue of the TX Citizen, reader Trey sent us a letter that began, Was it Robert Duval that said, I love the smell of Napalm in the morning in the Deer Hunter? We then inserted a note that read (Editor: Yes). Later in the day, the aforementioned editor realized that while that was indeed Duvalls line, it was not from The Deer Hunter it was from Apocalypse Now. But deadlines being deadlines, it was too late to fix it. Thank you for the hundreds of phone calls, emails, and shouts from the street pointing out this error. Omissions: The Houston-owned HeraldZeitung failed to report that the City lost their appeal to keep a judge from ruling on the legality of the disposable container ban, and other anti-tourism ordinances, until ten days after the event. The decision was handed down by Austins Third Court of Appeals on Friday, February 21, and not reported by the HZ until Sunday, March 3. KGNB came in second on that story, with only a five-day delay in reporting on the piece. Both newsrooms are expected to receive gold stars, smiley faces and pats on the head from the City Manager for sitting on the story as long as they could. As usual, TX Citizen fans were subjected to the story first, as it hit our Facebook page (facebook.com/txcitizen) on Friday, February 22, and received deeper coverage in the First Word column in our February 28 edition. That issue is still available online at txcitizen.com, and apparently provided the impetus for the Houstonowned paper to finally relent and give the biggest story of the week a mention. #newsfail

Part I:

1 WORD
ST
MIKE REYNOLDS
WITH
be considered the first incarnation of the TX Citizen The Adolph Seidemann Instantaneous Forum. We got our hands on original copy of Adolphs publication, courtesy of TX Citizen reader Joe Lisk, who found it in an old trunk that he got from an estate sale. Cool. In the March 2, 1936, inaugural edition of his Forum, Adolph took on the Citys government for rejecting a petition he submitted that would have triggered an election to dissolve the Citys Board of Development, which served the purpose of todays 4-B Board namely redistributing wealth from taxpayers to the pockets of certain well-connected businessmen. That rejection was based on the City Attorneys insistence that City Hall simply didnt have to accept the petition that decision based on an intentional misreading of the Citys Charter. (The charter apparently over-ruled then, as it does now, both the Texas and United States Constitutions). In a crazy twist, it seems our current City Council did exactly the same thing, for the same reason, in December of 2011. You know, with the petition to hold a recall election for Bryan Miranda. They just decided they didnt want it. (The circumstances under which that petition was put together and contested are now under the scrutiny of the Comal County Grand Jury, but thats another story altogether, and one weve already covered in this column. Its a good one though, and well keep up with the case as it makes its way through the system.) Anyhow, Adolph blasted the thenlocally-owned Herald for their complaint that the election would be expensive. Just like they did during the whole Bryan Miranda debacle. Hmmm. It seems weve got a pattern developing here Adolph then went after the astronomical, taxpayer-funded, sweetheart salary paid to the head of the City Board of Development. Uh oh. Now were really getting somewhere. It wont be long before we start publishing taxpayer-funded salaries too, and if you think weve made enemies before, wait until we print those numbers. Whoa Nelly! Its going to be something else. Continued on next page.

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Part II:

The More Things Stay the Same, the Less Everything Changes You want to hear something funny? I mean, not like funny ha-ha but kind of weird funny. Back in 1936 a local attorney/ rabble rouser named Adolph Seidemann had a look at the Citys government and the thenlocally-owned Herald, and declared their relationship corrupt. He went out and bought a printing press, and produced what might TXCITIZEN.COM

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Continued from previous page. Anyway, heres the complete text of Adolphs first edition. We have no doubt you will find it an entertaining reminder that some things never, ever change. Note: While the text, including typos, is original, we have adjusted the formatting to allow for easier reading. THE ADOLPH SEIDEMANN INSTANTANEOUS FORUM. Dedicated to the preservation of The Constitution and laws under which we are living. March 2, 1936. To the Voters and Citizens of New Braunfels, Texas. On February 26, 1936, as stated and set forth in the article appearing in the New Braunfels Herald in its issue of Friday, February 28, 1936, which article will be published in the German language in the New Braunfels Zeitung in its issue of March 4,1936, I filed petition signed by 277 voters asking for the calling of an election for the purpose of submitting the repeal of the ordinance creating a Board of Development to a vote of the people. This petition, as you have seen was refused by the City Commission of the City of New Braunfels, acting upon the advice of Mr. Martin Faust, City Attorney of New Braunfels. Mr. Faust suggested that another petition be circulated, which would ask for the repeal of the amendment under which the ordinance was passed. Just for your information I want to state that Mr. Faust is mistaken in his views, and the election could have been called and we could have voted on the issue involved at the general election to be held in the City of New Braunfels on the first tuesday in April, but I did not want any legal controversy which would deprive you of your right to vote on the question in the near future, although to circulate another petition would cost a great deal of money, so I prepared the petition as suggested by him, and employed Paul Lindemann to circulate the same, and it is now being circulated. In the New Braunfels Heral of February 28, 1936, under the large headlines, PETITION SUBMITTED TO CITY SEEKS TO SMASH BOARD OF DEVELOPMENT reference is made to the petition filed by 277 voters of New Braunfels, and on page 4 at the end of the article in column 4 this article closes with the following language, towit; It is estimated that such an election would cost several hundred dollars. Now that is just too bad, is it not? Well, who caused this expenditure? Was it not the City Attorney, who had advised the City Commission of the City of New Braunfels, that the citizens of New Braunfels could not demand an election to repeal an ordinance?

www.NBSTREETS.com
We dig so you dont have to.

I state to you, that the citizens of New Braunfels can demand an election at any time. The right to petition a City Commission or other governing agency is one of the sacred rights of the American people. Let me quote the Constitution of the United States. Congress shall make no laws respecting an establishment of religion, or prohibiting the free exercise thereof; or abridging the freedom of speech, or of the press; or the right of the people peaceably to assemble, and to petition the Government for a redress of grievances. That is the Constitution of the United States. Now let me quote to you the Constitution of the State of Texas. Article 1 Section 27 reads as follows; The citizens shall have the right, in a peaceable manner, to assemble together for their common good, and apply to those invested with the powers of government for redress of grievances or other purposes, by petition, address or remonstrance. That is the Constitution of the State of Texas. Mr. Faust just happened to get his hands on the wrong law book, for the law that he pointed out to the Mayor and Commissioners provided the manner of changing the Charter of the City, which is nothing less than the Constitution of the City of New Braunfels. But let that be as it may, if the election does cost several hundred dollars, that is considerably less than the average of $5071.42 per year, collected from the citizens of New Braunfels by a tax on their little homesteads and other property for the purpose of maintaining the City Board of Development. Well, this tax of $5071.42 per year did not seem quite right to E.P. Nowotny Jr. and the Junior Chamber of Commerce of New Braunfels, so this Junior Chamber of Commerce, through its President, E.P. Nowotny, on September 18, 1934, presented a resolution to the City Board of Development to reduce the salary and the expenses of Mr. Bailey Jones to $100.00 per month. Well, that was simply horrible to think that Mr. Jones should receive only $100.00 per month, so the City Board of Development, on October 16, 1934, entered into their minutes, that Mr. Bailey Jones should receive a salary of $2400.00 per year, that there should be allowed the sum of $550.00 for miscellaneous and extra help, and $300.00 for traveling expenses, and $150.00 for telegraph and telephone expenses, and $125.00 for stationary and stamps. I feel quite sure that $15.00 was sufficient for the stationary bill, so that left, if I am right, just $110.00 for stamps. About 3660 stamps were thus used for the purpose of answering correspondence. I had no idea that such an amount of stamps would be required.

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Miss Sartor has been attending to some of the duties formerly performed by Mr. Jones and if I had the time, I would investigate, just for the purpose of ascertaining whether the Junior Chamber of Commerce was correct in its views that $100.00 per month was sufficient compensation for the work that the Secretary of the Board of Development was required to do during these last few years of depression. That however, is a matter that the Junior Chamber of Commerce of New Braunfels is better able to answer than I am. I am just wondering how many of these citizens of New Braunfels, were as fortunate as Mr. Jones during the year 1934. When Mr. Jones first came to New Braunfels, he received $350 per month, and I am quite sure, although I did not read the minutes of the Board of City Development for the first few years of Mr. Baileys administration, that he also received some additional expense money. I cannot afford the expense of publishing letters through the newspapers, so I bought myself a new printing machine, and I am doing my own work. I feel that the Printers Union will get after me, but after they realize that I am trying to save their sacred sights, and also to save them some taxes, they will, I am sure, forgive me. I cannot give you all the news in

one issue, so look for the second issue, which will probably instantaneously appear some time Friday morning, March 6, 1936, but I may decide to issue daily letters. These letters will probably be worth reading on days when news are dull, and I therefore advise you to save this issue for future reference. Have just seen Paul Lindemann, he showed me petition he is circulating, so take cheer, many, many good people are coming up voluntarily and signing, so come along, I have pen and ink waiting for you. The Herald analyzed the first petition which Mr. Faust turned down. I have a copy of the names, and I will tell you about the 75 women that signed that petition, and also something about these old retired citizens. I feel sure that many, many business men will also sign in the next few days. They are beginning to realize that it is foolish on their part to fight the majority of the people. So long until March 6, and perhaps before. Adolph Seidemann.

Editors Note: Seidemanns birthday, January 6, will now be considered a holiday at TX Citizen HQ. We will white-wash his unfortunate choice to lead a group of New Braunfels-based Kaiser Wilhelm II sympathizers during WWI, and completely ignore his civic activities during WWII. \m/ Mike Reynolds Publisher/Editor-in-Chief

March 8
@ 6 MC & The Mystyx

CALENDAR
The Order of the Eastern Star is hosting a Lenten enchilada dinner on Saturday, March 9, at the Masonic Lodge at 1353 Wald Road in New 1 2 3 Braunfels. The dinner runs from 11am to 5pm, with plates at $8 for adults and $4 for kids 8 and under. For tickets, please call Matron Simone Lambdin at 830-606-6329. Note: Tickets will not be sold at the door advance sales only. The New Braunfels Blues Society invites you to the Blues Evolution, on Saturday, March 9th, at the historic Brauntex Theatre. 5 6 7 The show starts at 7pm, and features International Blues Challenge winner, the Homemade Jamz Blues Band, along with local blues favorite, Adam Johnson and the Pay Mes, as well as Blue Generation, a group comprised of area high school students formed just for this event. Tickets available online at brauntex.com For more information about the New Braunfels Blues Society, go to nbbluessociety.org.
11 Get Dude on, and abide10 with your tailgate and cooler of any size at the Board of Realtors office at 936 Gruene Road for a FREE drive-in showing of the Coen Brothers masterpiece, The Big Lebowski. You get John Goodman, Steve Buscemi, AND Philip Seymour Hoffman in ONE MOVIE. You go see. 7pm. 9 your

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13 14 15

JP Ruin vs M

Rush vs Santana

iguel the Rin

g BOY
Majestic King vs Danny Donovan

Chase Stevens taunts the crowd pre-match.

Fyre vs
Kill 30 vs Sean Mr 8 ian

Stevens

Results: Block Buster Wrestling at Big Als Gardens

The masked luchadore, Rush, got the show started, scoring an easy pinfall over Javier Taco Bueno Santana. In Match Two, rather than take on an actual wrestler, ultra-heavyweight JP Ruin chose to manhandle Miguel the Ring Boy in what could only be described as a cruel attack on a non-athlete. The Bully, Danny Donovan, had second thoughts about issuing his Bully Challenge to any and all comers, after the Majestic King took him up on the offer and put the Hardcore Title up for grabs. Most of that matchs action took place on the freshly blood-soaked pavement outside of the ring, with the King retaining his belt via pinfall, but only after nding himself on the receiving end of some brutal Donovan chairshots. The BBW Championship match was next, with a two out of three falls stipulation in the ght between submission specialist Sean Killian and current titleholder, Mr 830. Killian scored the rst fall, 830 the second, and the match ended in a time limit draw after 20 minutes. Under BBW rules, Mr 830 retained the belt. TNA veteran and three-time NWA Tag Team Champion Chase Stevens was upset by local grappler Mike Fyre. Stevens lighting fast workrate and powerful assualt were undone by his hubris, allowing underdog Fyre to unexpectedly and nearly inexplicably - roll him up for the pin. We expect Stevens to return sometime in the near future to even the score. In the Main Event, Irish Reds Blitz Title belt was hung high above the ring in preparation for Reds Belt vs Career ladder match against Judas Rage. After some devestating back-andforth brawling, (and interference from ring announcer and BBW promoter J-Rock), Rage climbed the ladder and retrived the belt, thus keeping his job with BBW. The show ended with wrestlers yelling at each other and the usual all-kid Battle Royal. Block Buster Wrestlings next shows are scheduled for Thursday, March 14, and Saturday, March 16 at RiverCity Range. For more information, logon to facebook.com/BBFNDUB.
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Irish R Judas Rage vs

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AROUND&ABOUT

Mike Besson, Jeff Dees , Levi McBee, Kathy Bearden-Porter, Bobby Craft, Eric Scroggin, Kelly Holmes, Tyler Handrick

Board of Directors - We're All In

2013 Contributors
Blake/Kelly Warren Canyon Lake FFA Center Point Station Chuck Nash Comaltex Insurance D & D Ranch Darrell/Julie Hill Ed/Dell Perry Eric White Hart Components/E. James Frost Bank Granzins Meat Market Greg/Vada Akery Guadalupe Valley Memorial Park J & R Gymnastics Jeff/Leigh Ann Dees Karl & Beth Hittle Kasey Mock Kenneth/Tonya Leonard Kiesling/Porter/Kiesling/Free Lancia Lennox Larry Hammonds Family Lee/Jamie Ezell Oakwood Baptist Pat/Becky Wiggins Perry Family LTD. Partnership Pete Bassett Riata Finacial Group L & L Camp Ground - R Skolaut Sac-N-Pac Tip Top Cleaners Zoeller Funeral Home Perry & Cindy Beyer Jeff & Melanie Beyer Point Collision Center 50 Foot Designs Boehringer-Ingelheim Chuck's Transport Inc. Cooper Ridge Felger & Friends for Hair GBMB Insurance Gruene with Envy/Giddy Up Gruene Jefferson Bank Mark & Kim Lehmann Meineke Car Care Center New Braunfels Elks Lodge Pure Party Ice Schertz Funeral Home Taste of New Braunfels The Vineyard at Gruene Tim & Wendi Langlinais Two P's & Calli's Boutique South Texas Steel Beinco of San Antonio Buffalo Wings & Rings El Nopalito Griffen Asset Management Jon Wayne Heating & Air Kenneth Fiebrich Outdoor Services TX Citizen Schnaps Haus, Inc. Taylor Designer Floors, Inc. Williams Supply Co. Woods Cycle Country Billys Ice House Dr Cole & Dr Smith Prime Lending & Steph Morgan Alamo Crane Service Midtex Oil James Gosset DDS Louis Liles Nathan Reneau Scott & Shelly Besson Steve Keller TexStar Bank J.R. & Janet Smith Karen Konecry McGhee Bros Mike & Melan Zimmerman First Commercial Bank Fuquay, Inc. Germana Insurance Valmark Chevrolet Southern Plains Fred & Jeri Lynn Scott New Braunfels Rotary Club Well Fargo Bank David Spencer Golesco, Inc. Guadalupe Valley Memorial Park Jeff Beyer Jeff & Melodie Beyer K & G Motors Old Ice House Perry & Cindy Beyer Serendipity Cakes Hill Country Poker League Re ection Taxidermy New Braunfels State Farm Agents Accents Decorative Concrete Bobby & Fern Lane Craig's Septic Pumping & Repairs Diana & Bobby Craft Providence Risk Russell & Jill Wenzel Justin Kelly Brien Brooks Daniel & Kandy Perkins JF Electrical Services Allen & Margie Eckhardt Bill & Angela Burton Brian & Gaye Werner Chris & Terry Wiemers Hill Country Customs Hill Country Customs Towing Jarrod & Tana Leonard Jeremy & Erin Leonard Maria & Mike Milewski Paige Rhodes Sherri Henwood Tim & Rosie Miner Russell & Karin Boos David & Elizabeth Doss David & Patty McDaniel Eric & Shawn Scroggin John & Pam Manchack Keith & Susan Smith Cassandra & Andrew Lindeman Rick & Julie Sheperd AA-Aarons Mini Storage Cravings Triple R Electric Dennis & Beverly Johnson Joe Bob & Annie James Rick James Kelly & Pam Holmes Charlie & Shawn Wimberly Jeff & Staci Neill Doug & D'Anndra Vader Gaylord Electric 3 Phase Technologies Dr Lee Luehl ng Excavating NB Booster Club Barney & Margi Handrick Bobby & Lori Jackson Clint & Lisa McElroy Culpepper Plumbing Services, Inc. Lance & Dawn Jonas Mamacitas Restaurant Molly Maid Ron Wetz R3K Farms Williams Heating, Air Conditioning & Appliances Bedford Family Dentistry The Leister Family Fiesta Lanes The Eastwood Family Canyon FFA Booster Club Hoffmann Show Goats Varni Roo ng Sage Capital Bank W & E Realty Co, LTD

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The Were All In buying group went all the way at last Saturdays Junior Stock Show, raising over $85,000 from local contributors which was then put toward purchasing animals at the show, along with two additional steers and two hogs. After processing, the meat was quick-frozen by Granzins Meat Market, and then distributed to the Comal County Crisis Center, the Comal County Senior Foundation, the New Life Childrens Center of Canyon Lake, and St Judes Childrens Shelter. After the event, Were All Ins Levi McBee had these words for the press: Wed like to send congratulations to all the youth that participated in this years show, and a huge thank you to all of the local businesses that stepped up and contributed funds to the buying group without their generous support none of this would have been possible.

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Dirtys Bar & Q

Steven Roloff & Friends 8pm 50s/60s Country Open Mic 6pm Jam Night w/ Scott Boddacker 6pm Lucas Taylor 5pm

The Bottom Feeders 6pm Collin Gee, DDot Elles, SymmaTree, Matty Dee, Anna Beth & Gost, Lace Tunes, Evan Taylor, DJ Notion 9pm, $5 Barry Adams 8pm Tom Gillam 7pm Jon Magill 8pm

Gruene Hall

Statesboro Revue 1pm Texas Tornados w/ Jeff Strahan 9pm, $10 Bonnie Lang 6pm Guadalupe Pirates 9pm David Grace 8pm Buster Jiggs 9pm, $3

Freiheit Country Store

The Happy Cow

Uptown Piano Bar Vineyard at Gruene Vino en Verde

The Pour Haus

Oma Gruenes Secret Garten Phoenix Saloon Adobe Verde

Oma Gruenes Secret Garten Phoenix Saloon

River Road Ice House Tavern in the Gruene Texas Music Theater

Garrett Heinrichs 8pm Rock & Roll Sing Along Piano Bar Show 9pm The Possum Posse 8:30pm

Daniel Thomas Phipps 5pm Indivine 9pm Hot Texas Swing Band 9pm Dry River Religion 8pm Rock & Roll Sing Along Piano Bar Show 9pm Wes Nickson 8pm

Sat 3.9
Black Whale Pub
Tyler Brown 9pm

Rileys Tavern Adobe Verde

AJs Ale House

Dirtys Bar & Q

Blues Burners 9pm, $3

Billys Ice House Black & Tan Pub

Spring Break San Marcos Margaritas in Paradise Son of a Sailor- Jimmy Buffett Tribute Classic Car Cruise In Margarita Contest 7:30pm, $20-$80 Unsurpassed Profit, Promise, Nosaprise, Fambly, Magna Carda, Ichi Ni San Shi, Chief & TheDoomsDayDevice, Christian Hyun, DJ Wahrk 8pm, $6 John Maclean 8pm Jeff Wood 7pm

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The Happy Cow

Manzy Lowry Band 8pm The Lesti Huff Band 1pm Peppers Blues 6pm Scott H Biram w/ The Beaumonts 9pm, $7

Triple Crown

Jennifer Sullivan 5pm DJ Tofer, DJ Newell, Gilbert Carrizalez 9pm Will Arrington Band, Brett Hauser Band 9pm Walt Wilkins & the Mystiqueros 6pm Josh Holden 9pm

Billys Ice House Black & Tan Pub

Treehuggerz Show 9pm

Oma Gruenes Secret Garten

Uptown Piano Bar Vineyard at Gruene Vino en Verde

Isis the Voice 9pm

Cheatham Street Warehouse Gruene Hall

Phoenix Saloon

Cheatham Street Warehouse

Adam Johnson Band 9pm Bart Crow 8pm, $10

Rileys Tavern Adobe Verde

The Knowhow 8pm

On The Half Shell Oyster Bar The Pour Haus

Gruene Hall On The Half Shell Oyster Bar

Josh Holden 9pm

Roy Heinrich & the Pickups 9pm

Sun 3.10
Oma Gruenes Secret Garten
The Blue Bucks 2pm

Steven Vee & Junior Nash 7pm Scott Wiggins 8pm

AJs Ale House

Tavern in the Gruene Triple Crown

The Pour Haus

Ike Eichenberg 6pm Buzz n Bangs, The Lion & The Giraffe, Sp_aces, The Wild Oats 9pm, $5 Ashley Stone 8pm

Paul Elridge 6pm Ransom Jack (acoustic) 9pm Matt Begley & Bitter Whiskey w/ Mike Stanley Band 8pm Tanner Louis & the Aviators 8pm

Rock & Roll Sing Along Piano Bar Show 9pm LC Rocks 8pm

Billys Ice House Black & Tan Pub

Phoenix Saloon
Al Barlow 2pm Jason Marbach 7pm Fallon Franklin 8pm

River Road Ice House

Prizmatic, Shadows of Recliation, Skies of Fire 10pm The Fossils 8:30pm

Adobe Verde Billys Ice House

Mark McKinney 8pm

Uptown Piano Bar

Tavern in the Gruene

Cheatham Street Warehouse

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Bret Graham 12:30pm The Whiskey Sisters 5pm Larry Martin Sweeney 7pm Andy Evans & the Brotherhood 8pm Mohawks for Food Benefit for the Hays County Food Bank Joel Hofmann Band 2pm

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Mon 3.11
Rileys Tavern
Songwriter Showcase w/ John Whipple Wink Keziah 8pm

Wed 3.13
Buffalo Wings & Rings
Steven Roloff & Friends 7:30pm

Floores Country Store

Robert Earl Keen w/ Doug Moreland 8pm, $25

Floores Country Store

Mario Flores & the Soda Creek Band 8pm, $8

Billys Ice House Gruene Hall

Rileys Tavern

Big Red Drum Artist Spotlight 9pm Vagabonds del Sol 8:30pm 3 Man Front 8pm

Bo Porter & Redd Volkhaert 1pm Bret Graham 6pm Empty Handed Vagabonds 8pm Court Nance & Friends 8pm

Watering Hole Saloon Billys Ice House Cheatham Street Warehouse

Kent Finlays Songwriters Circle 9pm Slim Bawb 12pm Ryan Bingham w/ Honeyhoney 8pm, SOLD OUT Nick Lawrence 7pm Chris King 8pm

Red Eyed Fly

Blasted Engines w/ The Standoffs 9:30pm, Inside Riversyde w/ So it is Written, Jimmy Jets TV Set, The Green View, E.B.M. 8:30pm, Outside

Red Eyed Fly

Sam Pace & The Gilded Grit w/ J Ray 10pm, Inside Holy Ka-Kow w/ Anacostia, Superette, The Household, Dewey Decibal System 8:30pm, Outside

River Road Ice House Tavern in the Gruene Triple Crown

Gruene Hall

Samantha Lynn 6pm Chief & TheDoomsdayDevice 10pm

Sams Burger Joint

Mingo Fishtrap w/ Josh Weathers 8pm, $17

Sams Burger Joint

Wheeler Brothers w/ Wild Child 8pm, $13

Tues 3.12
The Happy Cow
Open Jam w/ Uncle Daddy 8pm

The Pour Haus River Road Ice House Triple Crown

Beth Lee 6pm Colin Colby 9pm, $4

Stetson Bar
Widow Maker 9:30pm

Stetson Bar
Southern Voice 9:30pm

Rileys Tavern

Mark Sebby & Friends 9pm Chris Vetter 8:30pm

Watering Hole Saloon Billys Ice House

TXCITIZEN.COM

Thirsty Horse Saloon

Dave Jorgenson 8pm

Thirsty Horse Saloon

Jay Eric Band 8pm

Uptown Piano Bar

John Maclean 8pm

Ratliff Dean, Austin Gilliam 8:00pm

-A R R ES TE D -

BAXTER, EDWARD LEE

LYNCH, ALLAN LEE

Male 506 150 lbs DOB: 03/16/1953 CHARGE: Possession of a controlled substance

Male 507 175 lbs DOB: 12/18/1982 CHARGE: Failure to comply with sex offender registration

-A R R ES TE D -

CARRILLO, JUANITA DELEON

Female 500 140 lbs Female 505 130 lbs DOB: 10/21/1981 DOB: 08/16/1957 CHARGE: Failure to CHARGE: Theft appear for possession with two or more of a controlled convictions for same substance offense

MLADEK, MERANDA K

-A R R ES TE D -

DIAZ, RAUL A
Male 503 145 lbs DOB: 02/08/1971 CHARGE: Motion to revoke probation for driving while intoxicated with child under 15 YOA

Male 508 200 lbs DOB: 05/21/1972 CHARGE: Bail jumping/ failure to appear

ORTIZ, DANIEL

Male 600 185 lbs DOB: 05/26/1989 CHARGE: Courts Motion to revoke probation for possession of a controlled substance pg 1 under 1 gram

Female 509 170 lbs DOB: 08/05/1986 CHARGE: Failure to appear for burglary of habitation

LEE, BRADLEY JOE

Male 510 225 lbs DOB: 09/24/1982 CHARGE: Motion to revoke for possession of a controlled substance

SERRANO, RICARDO RICKY

Male 506 165 lbs DOB: 02/17/1986 CHARGE: Two counts of bail jumping/ failure to appear

$200 REWARD
10

FOR INFORMATION LEADING TO THE ARREST OF COMAL COUNTYS MOST WANTED. Callers will remain anonymous.

830.620.3400 - 24-Hour 830.620.3411 - Mon-Fri 8am to 5pm

-A R R ES T ED -

KINCAID, RYAN ANDREW

SALINAS, LARA NOEL

By Gustavo Arellano gabachos call all Latinos Mexican). Chino is one of the more fascinating homographs Dear Readers: The Mexican is currently (words with the same spelling but different dealing with deportation issues but will return meanings) in Spanish. Its Old World meaning next week once he builds his 15-foot escalera specifically refers to a person of Chinese to climb over that pesky 14-foot wall. In the descent, but in his Dictionary of Latin American meanwhile, here are some oldies-but-goodies Racial and Ethnic Terminology, Rutgers linguist to tide you by like yesterdays menudo. Enjoy! Thomas M. Stephens documents how chino assumed different connotations once the Dear Mexican: It seems that conquistadors pillaged the Americasand whenever Chicano professors want to none of those connotations was positive. show off their mexicanidad, they wear Stephens book devotes an incredible a guayabera. In fact, I saw a picture of seven pages to chino; some of its more you in the Los Angeles Times donning peculiar Latin American definitions include the shirt, along with Dickies pants female servant, slave from Mozambique, and Converse All Stars. How trite and concubine, young Indian female who bourgeois! You go to a caf or bar in served in a convent, and, yes, curlyany university town in Mexico, and the haired. Chino also was the category in students will think youre totally naco. the Spanish Empires Byzantine castas I stopped wearing the guayabera when a friend said I looked like a waiter in a (caste) system designated for the offspring Mexican restaurant. Do certain clothes of parents with varying degrees of African and Amerindian blood. Stephens only sin determine your Mexicanness? is that he doesnt explain why chino took on Sexy Mexy so many non-Chinese connotations, though Dear Wab: Abso-pinche-lutely. The he did write that china in Quechua signifies bigger the sombrero, the wabbier the man, is female servant or animal, while Nahuatl a commandment all Mexicans learn from the speakers used chinoa (toasted) to describe Virgin of Guadalupe. But seriously, Mexican dark-skinned people. And he offers no insight clothes correspond to social and economic into the chino-curly connection. But it doesnt take a Ph-pinche-D to statussweaty T-shirt indicates laborer, identify the common threads in chinos various calf-length skirt means a proper Mexican woman, and if a cobbler used the hide of an meanings: African blood and servitude. endangered reptile to fashion your cowboy Many blacks, of course, have naturally kinky boots, youre probably a drug dealer or a hair, so at some point over the centuries, Texan. The guayabera (a loose-fitting, pleated chino became an ethnicon (a term meant to shirt common in the Mexican coastal state of comment on an ethnic groups prominent Veracruz and other tropical regions of Latin cultural characteristic that become popular America) also announces something about its shorthand for said characteristic) for both owner: the gey is feeling hot and wants to black person and curly. Mexicans then look sharp. Why the hate, Sexy? Remember went on to drop the black denotation and kept what Andy Warhol said: Nothing is more the curly connection. Such linguistic amnesia bourgeois than to be afraid to look bourgeois. isnt unprecedented in Mexican Spanish: Who cares if people mistake you for a waiter if marrano, which many Mexicans use to call you sport a guayabera? Just spit in their soup. someone a pig or filthy, comes from the And who cares if Mexican university students Inquisition-era slur used against Jews who call me, you or any guayabera wearer a naco converted to Christianity. All this wordplay is (Mexico City slang for bumpkin)? They cant further proof that Mexico is a country with a racial problem that makes America seem like be that smart if theyre still in Mexico. Sesame Street. The proper Spanish word for Why do Mexicans call people with curly, by the way, is rizado.

The names listed have been released in accordance with the Texas Public Information Act Code 552.001 st.seq.annotated Public Record and Information disclosure statues. This is a true and accurate account as of Monday, March 04, 2013 at 9:45 am and may not be current by the time it is read. Do not try to apprehend anyone. For anonymous tips and rewards, please contact Crime Stoppers at: 24-Hour Phone number 830.620.3400; Mon-Fri 8am to 5pm 830.620.3411. These are listings of criminal warrants with the Sheriffs Office and are not indicative of guilt or innocence. Officers are to verify the status of each warrant prior to making an arrest. Any person is innocent of wrongdoing unless proven guilty in a court of law.

curly hair chinos? Most chinos I know have very straight, hard-to-curl hair. China Confundida
Dear Confused Chinita: The Mexican has discussed the word chino before, as in why Mexicans call all Asians chinos (same reason

MOST WANTED

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Ask the Mexican at themexican@ askamexican.net, be his fan on Facebook, follow him on Twitter @gustavoarellano or ask him a video question at youtube. com/askamexicano!
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UNCLE ESEL
Uncle Esel, One day I heard someone from the city mention that public bathrooms in the park or somewhere were used for other things with a big emphasis on the word other. I wasnt sure what to make of it. Is there some big drug problem that they are referring too? Thank You, Hellen
Dear Hellen, I dont really think they were talking about drug problems in public restrooms though that may at times pop up. I think the thinly veiled reference was about illicit sexual behavior occurring in the bathrooms. You see, there is a group of George Michael wannabees hanging out in public bathrooms, and I dont mean wannabee singers in that bunch. In years past, public bathrooms in the parks of this city and many other cities have been utilized as meeting places for an occasional anonymous sich treffen or hooking up. Seems like over the years, one of the most notorious places has been the bathroom at Cypress Bend Park, where even some well respected (previously respected) ahhemm, gentlemen have gone to display their wide stance. Businessmen and even school teachers have been caught in the act of lewd behavior and in other cities, politicians, priests and policemen have been caught. Perhaps the time has come for some group to enact a bathroom ban. From what the Esel hears, most of our local lewd behavior comes from inappropriate photography by people on the banks of the Comal River, but thats all in the interest of monitoring behavior, so once again, no problem here. Right? Love, K you have a duty to find out what she is up to, but youve already set up a relationship that sounds less like a mother and more like a running around pal. You are fighting a battle that you should never have set up. You need to assert your role as mother and show that your interest is as her mother and then you can get some control back. There is nothing wrong with being friends with your children, but when that blocks your role as parent, youre doing it wrong. When Esel was thirteen, a switch was still in good use and boy did I deserve it from time to time. Unfortunately, the switch has gone the way of the pay phone, U.S. born presidents and quality TV. Gain control soon and just maybe you wont be a Grandma in the fall. Love, K

ADVICE FROM

Dear Mr. Esel, Saw the sinkhole that swallowed up some poor dude in Florida. Any chance of sink holes around here? Cheers, Eddie
Dear Eddie, There is no record of any sinkhole swallowing up any local dudes. While we occasionally have some cliff edges fall off in the Hill Country as well as water carving up some dirt and disappearing into a recharge feature in the limestone hills, that stuff doesnt happen as much here. Thats not to say they dont exist, as one very famous sinkhole is called the Devils Sinkhole near Rock Springs. Sinkholes can more frequently occur further into the Edwards Plataea, but they are not like the ones we more commonly see in Florida, East Texas, or Southeast Texas that make the news. One more famous sinkhole in Texas occurred near Houston, in Daisetta, Texas which has suffered from many sinkholes given that the entire town sits on a what is essentially a big salt dome. Many of these East Texas sinkholes are actually the result of human activity in the form of abandoned salt mines. Rest assured, the prospects of suffering a sinkhole here in town are far, far less than the effect of a whole other kind of hole that coincidently, probably comes from East Texas also. Love, K

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Uncle Esel, My 13 year old daughter has a steady and serious boyfriend and Ive recently heard her awake after midnight with what I think is texting. I want her to respect me as a mother but I am a little curious about the texting. Do I dare messing up our relationship as best friends by demanding to see her texts or sneaking a look while she is in the shower, which is the only time she doesnt take her phone with her? Sincerely (withheld)
Dear No-Name Clueless Mom, Shes thirteen. Do you really have to ask this question? This Esel may be old fashioned, but this girl is way too young to be in a steady and serious relationship with a boy. Heck yeah TXCITIZEN.COM

Uncle K. Esel is a lifetime resident of our fair city, and is well known for his sage advice on a wide range of topics. If you find yourself perplexed with no one to turn to, send your question to Uncle Esel at: askesel@TXCITIZEN. COM. Be sure to write Question for Uncle Esel in the subject line of your email.

NB INGS xt W Te 727 S to 72 FFER AT O GRE AYS! FOR IVEAW &G

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983 LOOP 337 NEW BRAUNFELS, TX 78130

11

830-626-9464(WING)

GIT CHA SUM

Lip Smackin', Finger Lickin', Award Winnin' South Texas BBQ and a Cold Beer!

H APPY COW
B A R & G R I L L
T h e U d d e r P l a c e i n H u n t e r, T X

Thursday march 7
Steven Roloff & Friends 8pm-12am

Pool Tournament Every Monday 8pm Every Tuesday is Open Jam

hosted by Uncle Daddy 8pm

Friday March 8
Randy Sosa & Friends 8pm-12am

Saturday March 9
Blues Burners 9pm-1am "Where Texans Eat Dirty Good!" dirtystexas@yahoo.com 830-379-8883

BELTSANDER RACES March 16! March 8 Kim Meeks and Her Bad Habits March 9 Manzy Lowry Band ER NEV R! March 15 3 Chord Rodeo VE A CO March 16 AC & the Bad Billys
Following Beltsander Races

Parties/Catering

Kitchen Hours:
Tues-Fri 11:30am-10pm Sat & Sun 2pm-10pm
Including sh and fried bologna sandwiches
9103 FM 1102 San Braunfels (Hunter, TX) 512.353.0030

NEW MENU!

HWY 46, 2 MILES PAST CLEAR SPRINGS

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THE

WITH MITCHELL WILBURN

Sierra Nevadas Ruthless Rye IPA Whats in a name? A moniker? A hashtag, even? So whats in Rye? Consider the rye, if you will, and tell me what you see. Is it a toasty bread with fennel seeds, literally sandwiching a pile of salty pink meat? Is it a brown liquor, kind of spicy and sweet and filling the glass of a man from the 1950s? Or is it an IPA with a real animal spirit to it? Yes, if the world of IPAs was football, I think Rye IPAs would be rugby. Slightly different, a little more scary, but oddly unappreciated. Not to mention largely ignored by the media. Regardless, there are some real honeys of Ryes out there. One of which is a seasonal release by the famous desert brewery, Sierra Nevada. While it seems that they dont get much play outside of their wheelhouse beers, this seasonal is more celebrated than any of them. Im particularly fond of their hefe, but thats neither here nor there. You can find this IPA in grocery stores these days, bought up by the sixer and twelve pack. Of all the beers that occupy that kind of no-mans land between bottom-shelf gas station fodder and proper bottle shop alums, Ruthless Rye IPA is certainly... one of them. Ok, I have to admit, to myself and the world, that I just dont really swallow the hype on this one. Im not saying its bad or anything, Im just saying that judged as a Rye IPA, it doesnt really cut the mustard (screw thousand-island, Ill make my Reuben how I want). Im thinking that sometimes these kinds of beers are given a bit of a leeway with how they are judged, considering their middle-market competition. Its like the fact that when you generally see something next to the shrink wrapped Miller Lite tall-boy three pack, anything above a Blah gets a gold star and a pat on the back and free tickets to a magic show. If Sierra Nevada wasnt already so big, and the standards for big places so low, Ruthless Rye wouldnt shake so many moneymakers. Or hell, at least it wouldnt be a freakin ninety-something on review sites. Alas, let us observe it objectively. Ruthless Rye pours a solid dark amber, pretty clear, and has a pretty large, fluffy, and retaining head. I did mine in a tulip glass, but the aromas coming off of it were strong enough without it. Very floral, and a good enough hit of a grapefruit citrus note, but all were cranked up to eleven. It made it a little hard to appreciate the namesake, the rye. Maybe in the taste then? Well, the first thing you get is just a ton of resinous hops and a very sweet, almost cloying bready malt. The overt sweetness I can contribute to the rye, and there was a kind of aftertaste of a spice, but for a Rye IPA to be a fairly onedimensional IPA with hardly any Rye, I dont think this is deserving of the praise. The resin lingers in a kind of chalky dryness, dissuading me from trying more. I think that is the real Achilles Heel here, it just brings down the drinkability so much. I am sad to say that of the several I drank this past week, I barely finished the first one, and let the other attempts Mitchell Wilburn is our resident bon vivant and arbiter of all things barley. Send your beer questions to him at hops@txcitizen.com. at trying it out go to waste.

Your Birthday this Week

PRICKLY PEAR

WITH THE "HEAVENLY BODIES", HELEN AND EILEEN CUNNINGHAM

Dear Pisces: I'm sure you've seen the news regarding Pope Benedict's retirement. I'm sure you have - I'm an astrologist. And I'm also sure of what you're thinking, and I say GO FOR IT! Find a decent campaign manager, plan a bus tour, print up bumper stickers, and get ready to kiss a lot of beautiful babies. The road to Conclave is long and arduous, fraught with archdioceses and cardinals who'll want to see you, a layperson, fail, but it's about time that white smoke announced that a staunch believer in the Zodiac is now leader of the gaudiest church in the land! Congratulations Pisces! You are the new Pope. Now the press and the Vatican and other useless organizations are going to try to snuff you out. It's a conspiracy. Now, do yourself a favor and dress the part. Get thee to a funky hat shop! I believe it was psychic acting teacher Juan LeToutoufitte who said "Commit! Commit! Commit!" And breathe. Act the Pope, talk the Pope, become the Pope. Godspeed.

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WED MARCH 13
WOO-HOO! Hump Day. IKR? Pre-Season St Pat's Day Party Wear some Green, Spend some Green Ladies Night Karaoke w/Johnny V Big Warm-up Party for St Pat's Day Green Beer & DJ KC ALL OUT ST PAT'S DAY PARTY! Green Beer & Karaoke/Johnny V

Est. 1986

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Last Word
With Kelly Colby
The Politics of the Undead Modern culture has developed an interesting relationship with vampires. We have taken the monster into our hearts and developed compassion for him, even idolized him. Where once the vampire was a ghastly horror that slinked in the shadows and threatened our very souls, he is now a hero, (or at the very least misunderstood), a sparkly heartthrob for teenage girls to swoon over. We invite him in; feed him ourselves and find others for him to feed on; and when he has drained us unto death, we accept our own demise gratefully and consider it a gift. Nothing could be more dangerous, and our foolish fascination with, and veneration of, the fiend may cost us dearly. The vampire is a supernatural being but comes from mankind. Each vampire was once, himself, human, but now stands apart from humanity, abnormal and abhorrent to human nature. In fact, the vampire is such that it transcends both humanity and nature. He can mold, alter, and forestall many of what we see as the natural laws of the universe, but for all his purported immortality, his efforts are only temporary, and when nature reasserts itself, it does so savagely, often bringing woe to the vampire and all held under his sway. The vampire, likewise, has no actual humanity but is subject to all of humanitys failings. He is ever consumed by greed, lust indeed all of the deadly sins. A vampire can certainly feign virtue, but any such virtuous acts inevitably lead to benefit primarily for the vampire. A vampire might feed or protect a thrall, but this is hardly compassion. It simply cements his own power over the hapless underling. Being supernatural does not prevent the vampire from having some corollaries in nature, though. Vampires clearly exhibit features of both the predator and the parasite. Like most predators, the vampire fills its niche perfectly. Its abilities mirror humanitys weaknesses. While it stands vastly outnumbered by its prey, it prevails by using guile, trickery, and raw power. The vampire preys on easy meals first, focusing on the weak, ill, and outcasts of society, and he is more likely to turn the wealthy and powerful to his own purposes than confront them directly. In some respects, the vampire is a parasite as well. It feeds on its host and offers nothing of value in return. It uses humanity to TXCITIZEN.COM reproduce itself either by making other vampires or creating thralls bound to its will. The gifts a vampire appears to offer are always illusionary and do nothing but create new victims. While vampires are powerful, they are not invulnerable. No vampire can abide any true faith. They may take on the trappings of virtue and holiness as a means of disguise, but they cringe in horror from anyone holding a philosophy that is pure of heart. Here, even symbols are of value, and when a vampire is faced with any true symbol of faith, they will do their best to demean, desecrate, or destroy it. Vampires may also be sent into a state of torpor through loss of or inaccessibility to blood. Generally, this is done by driving a stake through the beasts heart. This paralyzes the vampire, and without blood it will waste and wane in power, but a vampire dispatched in this way is not truly dead. Many vampires have been destroyed by lopping off their heads, but this is no protection against whatever progeny they may have created, and a hardy group of villagers throwing off one vampire lord may find themselves in no better position after the dust has settled. Sunlight is the only true destroyer of vampires. Vampires cannot abide the light of day. Their flesh will smoke, their bodies shrivel, and ultimately they are turned to dust when exposed to the light. This has less to do with any scientific properties in sunlight than it does with removing all a vampires powers. A vampire in sunlight is laid bare in his evil for all to see. He cannot hide or beguile anyone in this position. A vampire is in this way made completely powerless, and a powerless vampire is nothing and as such, reverts to nothing, quite literally. That is not to say that we should seek to destroy vampires. A vampire is so dangerous a creature that it is better to avoid one, if one can, than to kill it. Many vampire hunters have fallen under the power of the vampire they sought to destroy, and they can often be turned and used against those they once professed to protect. Its the height of hubris to take combat to a vampire. Protect yourself if you can, but attacking a vampire directly is rarely prudent. A better solution is to recognize the vampire for what it is and neutralize it as a threat. Putting distance between yourself and the vampire is a good tactic. Its hardly wise to live in the shadow of a vampires lofty castle. Place yourself as far out of reach of a vampires power as you can. In addition, there are ways to make your self less attractive to a vampire. Garlic, running water, and various herbal remedies have been suggested, but it is just as useful to remember that a vampire is a predator and prevent the vampire from using his predatory talents to make you prey. Prepare yourself against the vampires guile, and assume that all favors have a compensatory cost. Likewise, avoid a vampires stealth. Be mindful of your surroundings during the night, and when faced with a situation where you must deal with someone you suspect is a vampire, insist that all his dealings be done in the daylight. As mentioned before, faith can be a powerful protector. Not only is it distasteful to the vampire, but it also allows someone to recognize the vampire for the evil that he is and resist his temptations. Lastly, never invite a vampire into your home. A vampire will often rely on your compassion and good nature to trap you. He may seem harmless or even attractive, but underestimate him at your own peril. This last thing is our greatest problem currently. From time immemorial vampires have been recognized as a danger and evil. They kill as easily as they breathe. Now, though, we seem to have lost our traditional good sense. This may not be a social accident. Vampires have long hoped to have a placid and willing group to prey on. They have, no doubt, put a good deal of resources into public relations, skewing public opinion to make it easier for them to ply their unspeakable trade. It has certainly happened before. Dont be fooled. A vampire is at all times seeking to victimize you, or someone else through his dealings with you. Remember that a vampire is first and always a predatory beast, seeking to live unjustly on the lifeblood of others. Dont fall under the vampires spell. Dont give up your life or your soul without a fight. Revile these creatures of the night, and force them into the sunlight when opportunity presents itself. We may never be rid of vampires, but we can, and should limit their power over us.

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