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A Godly Marriage Is God's Way to Avoid Sex Sin

COPYRIGHT © 03/11/09
By L. Tyler, P.O.Box 620763, San Diego, CA 92162-0763
All rights reserved.This file, in its entirety, may be posted on or copied
off of computer networks like Internet or WWW by anyone so inclined
as long as it is not changed.
oldservant8@aol.com, oldservant@gmail.com,
anoldservant8@yahoo.co.in

I submit that the Greek and Bible context of Titus 2, Prov 5 and 1 Cor
7:2 is as follows:
1Cor 72But because of sexual immorality, each man SHOULD [i.e. is
under the absolute
command that requires full obedience to] be [SEXUALLY]
HAVING/HOLDING/ POS-
SESSING his own wife, CLOSELY [AND SEXUALLY] ADHERING,
CLINGING TO [her], and each woman SHOULD [i.e. is under the
absolute command that requires full obedience to] be [FONDLY
AND AFFECTIONATELY] HAVING/HOLDING/POSSESSING her own
husband CLOSELY [AND AFFECTIONATELY] ADHERING, CLINGING
TO [him].

These are the locations where you can find the Bible study resources I
used to do this study.

Strong's Greek = http://www.tgm.org/bible.htm - - -


www.biblestudytools.net/Lexicons/Greek/
www.tencommandments.org/concord.html
www.blueletterbible.org/search.cfm
http://bible.crosswalk.com/Lexicons/NewTestamentGreek/

******************1 Cor 7:1 Now concerning the things whereof ye


wrote unto me: It is good
for a man not to touch[G680] (5733) a woman.
Strong's Greek G680 = attach, touch
5733 = Tense - Present See 5774 = The present tense
represents a simple statement of fact
or reality viewed as 0CCURRING in actual present time,
becoming
It is good for a man not to be TOUCHING a woman, not to
be ATTACHING himself to a woman.

******************7:2 Nevertheless, to avoid fornication, let [G0] every


man have [G2192] (5720) his own wife, and let [G0] every woman
have [G2192] (5720) her own husband.

[G0] = This word is not in the original Greek. It was used to


show a command, but not the
apparent one, i.e. [You] let/allow every man [to] have his
own wife. The
subject/actor/agent is NOT "you let/allow", it is "every man
have." Every man is
commanded to be having his own wife.
The Southern Baptist's Holman Christian Standard Bible
[HCSB]: "2 But because of
sexual immorality, each man should have his own wife,
and each woman should have her own husband."

[G2192] = 1) to have, i.e. to hold


a) to have (hold) in the hand, in the sense of
wearing, to have (hold) possession
of the mind (refers to alarm, agitating
emotions, etc.), to hold fast keep, to have
or comprise or involve, to regard or consider
or hold as
2) to have i.e. own, possess
b) used of those joined to any one by the bonds
of natural blood or marriage or
friendship or duty or law etc, of attendance or
companionship
4) to hold one's self to a thing, to lay hold of a
thing, to adhere or cling to
a) to be closely joined to a person or a thing
5720 Tense - Present See 5774 = The present tense
represents a simple statement of fact or reality viewed as
0CCURRING in actual present time, becoming [HCSB expanded]: "2
But because of sexual immorality, each man should be HAVING
his own wife, and each woman should be HAVING her own
husband." 5720 Mood - Imperative See 5794 = The
imperative mood corresponds to the English
imperative, and expresses a command to the hearer to perform a
certain action by the order and authority of the one
commanding. . . an absolute command requiring full
obedience on the part of all hearers, becoming [HCSB expanded]: "2But
because of sexual immorality, each man SHOULD [i.e.
is under the absolute command that requires full
obedience to] be HAVING his own wife, and each woman SHOULD [i.e.
is under the absolute command that requires full
obedience to] be HAVING her own husband."
All this yields the following: 2But because of sexual immorality,
each man SHOULD [i.e. is under the absolute command that
requires full obedience to] be HAVING/HOLDING/POSSESSING his own
wife CLOSELY ADHERING, CLINGING TO [her], and each woman
SHOULD [i.e. is under the absolute command that requires full
obedience to] be HAVING/HOLDING/POSSESSING her own
husband CLOSELY ADHERING, CLINGING TO [him].

God's Bible makes it clear that having one's wife is a sexually


intimate experience: ***Prov 5: 18 Let your fountain be blessed,
and take pleasure in the wife of your youth. 19
A loving doe, a
graceful fawn— let her breasts always satisfy[7301] you; be
lost [7686] in her love[160] forever. [HCSB] *** 18
Let your
fountain be blessed, And rejoice with the wife of your youth.
19
As a loving deer and a graceful doe, Let her breasts satisfy you
at all times; And always be enraptured with her love. [New King
James Version] ***18Let your fountain be blessed, and rejoice in
the wife of your youth, 19
a lovely deer, a graceful doe. Let her
breasts fill [7301] you at all times with delight; be intoxicated
[7686] always in her love [160] . [ESV]

Strong's 7301 ravah = make drunk, (take the)


fill, satiate, (abundantly) satisfy
Strong's 7686 shagah = the idea of
intoxication) to reel, (figuratively) be enraptured
Strong's 160 'ahabah = affection

Strong's definitions yield the following:


***Prov 5:18Let your fountain be blessed,
and rejoice in the wife of your youth,
19
a lovely deer, a graceful doe.
Let her breasts INTOXICATE/SATIATE/SATISFY you at all times with
delight;
be INTOXICATED/ENRAPTURED always in her AFFECTION.

COUPLE THIS WITH TITUS


***2:3 The aged women likewise, . . . :4 That they may teach the
young wives . . . to love their husbands <5362>, . . . ,
Strong's 5362 - fond affectionate love
Yielding: That they may teach the young wives . . . to FONDLY
AND AFFECTIONATELY love their husbands

Since 1 Cor 6:18-7:5 shows us that the context is sexual,


specifically sexual morality, we can
know that all the above yields the following:
1Cor 72But because of sexual immorality, each man SHOULD [i.e.
is under the absolute
command that requires full obedience to] be [SEXUALLY]
HAVING/HOLDING/ POS-
SESSING his own wife CLOSELY [AND SEXUALLY] ADHERING,
CLINGING TO [her], and each woman SHOULD [i.e. is under the
absolute command that requires full obedience to] be [FONDLY
AND AFFECTIONATELY] HAVING/HOLDING/POSSESSING her own
husband CLOSELY [AND AFFECTIONATELY] ADHERING, CLINGING
TO [him].

*******************7:3 Let the husband render unto the wife due


[G3784] (5746) benevolence [G2133]: and likewise
also the wife unto the husband.
Strong's (3784) = to owe (pecuniarily); figurative to be under
obligation (ought, must, should);
morally to fail in duty: — behove, be bound, (be) debt (-or), (be) due
(- ty), be guilty (indebted),
(must) need (-s), ought, owe, should.
Strong's 2133 = "kindness; euphemism conjugal duty: —
benevolence, good will."
***3 A husband should fulfill his marital duty to his wife, and likewise
a wife to her husband.
[HCSB]
***3 Let the husband render to his wife the affection due her, and
likewise also the wife to her
husband. [NKJV]
*** The husband should give to his wife her conjugal rights, and
3

likewise the wife to her husband.


[ESV]

All of the above yields the following: The husband should give to his
wife the kindness, benevolence and good will in the marital/conjugal
rights that he owes to her and is morally bound to give her, and
likewise the wife should give to her husband the kindness,
benevolence and good will in the marital/conjugal rights that she owes
to him and is morally bound to give to her husband.

******************7:4 The wife hath not power [G1850] (5719) of her


own body, but the husband: and likewise also the husband hath not
power [G1850] (5719) of his own body, but the
wife.
Strong's (1850 fro, 1849) = to control: — exercise authority upon,
bring under the (have) power of.
***Rom 13:1 Everyone must submit to the governing authorities
[1849], for there is no authority
[1849] except from God, and those that exist are instituted by
God.
Strong's (1849) = privilege, i.e. (subject) force, capacity,
competency,
freedom, or (object) mastery (concrete magistrate,
superhuman,
potentate, token of control), delegated influence: — authority,
jurisdiction, liberty, power, right, strength.
The power [1850] of 1 Cor 7:4 is derived from the authority [1849] in
Romans 13. All of this means that husbands and wives have the
same authority over each other's bodies that civil
authorities (police, judges, firemen, legislators, governors,
presidents) have over those under their
authority. That means that the husband's and wife's authority is to
be obeyed, as unto the Lord.
***Rom 13:1 Everyone must submit to the governing authorities, for
there is no authority except from God, and those that exist are
instituted by God. 2 So then, the one who resists the authority is
opposing God's command, and those who oppose it will bring judgment
on themselves. 3 For rulers are not a terror to good conduct, but to bad.
Do you want to be unafraid of the authority? Do good and you will have
its approval.

*****************7:5 Defraud [G650] (5720) ye not one the other,


except it be with consent [G4859] for a time [G2540], that ye may give
yourselves to fasting and prayer; and come [G4905] (5741) together
[G1909] [G846] again, that Satan tempt you not for your incontinency
[G192].

Strong's = (650) (to deprive); to despoil: — defraud, destitute, kept


back by fraud.
Strong's = (4859) sounding together (alike), i.e. (figurative)
accordant (neuter as noun, agreement):
— consent.
Strong's = (2540) an occasion, i.e. set or proper time: — x always,
opportunity, (convenient, due)
season, (due, short, while) time, a while.
Strong's = (4905) to convene, depart in company with, associate
with, or (special) cohabit
(conjugally/maritally): — accompany, assemble (with),
come (together), come (company, go) with, resort.
Strong's = (192) want of self-restraint: — excess, incontinency. =
lack of self-control
***5 Do not deprive/defraud one another—except when you agree
[both consenting], for a time, to devote yourselves to
prayer. Then come together cohabiting again; otherwise, Satan may
tempt you because of your lack of self-control.

*****************7:97:9 . . . . , let them marry; . . .(KJV, NKJV, Darby)


---"they should get married." (Complete Jewish Bible)
---"they should marry" (NIV, NCV, NAB, NEB, AB)
---"they should go ahead and marry" (NLT)
---"go ahead and get married" (CEV,
---"they should by all means go ahead and get married" (Message
---"get married" (Beck

+++So the passage is much more correctly understood as saying "2


but because of cases of immorality every man should be having his
own wife, . . . . .3. The husband should be fulfilling his duty towards his
wife . . . 8 But I say to the unmarried and to the widows, It is good for
them that they remain even as I. 9. But if they are not exercising self-
control, they should marry. . . ."

+++The active aorist of the verse nine command to marry really


expands the meaning of the command. "The aorist is like the imperfect
in that it refers to past time. But the imperfect refers to continuous
action in past time (I was loosing), while the aorist is the simple past
tense (I loosed). . . . But in past time the distinction is very carefully
made; the Greek language shows no tendency whatever to confuse the
aorist with the imperfect" (pp.81ff; New Testament Greek; by J. G.
Machen; Macmillan Co.). This means that the fuller meaning of the
verse is as follows: "9. but if they are not exercising self-control they
should already be married. . . . " This means that those unmarried or
widows who were not exercising self-control successfully should
already have remedied the situation by marrying. The precedent for
this in Sinai Law, the Law that Jesus commanded be kept while He was
walking on earth (Mat 23:1-3), is found in Deut 22: 28 "If a man find a
damsel, a virgin, who is not betrothed, and lay hold on her, and
[sexually] lie with her, and they be found, 29 then the man that
[sexually] lay with her shall give unto the damsel's father fifty shekels
of silver, and she shall be his wife, because he has humbled her; he
may not put her away all his days."

+++This makes 1 Cor 7:8,9 more than just a command for the
unmarried or widows who are failing to exercise self-control. This
means that not only are they sinning by failing to control themselves, it
means that they failed to marry when they failed to exercise self-
control, and are continuing in the double sin of failing to exercise self-
control as well as failing to marry because of their self-control. Their sin
has two aspects, failure to be self-controlled and failure to have
married because of their self-control. We know that the correct
response to such failure and sin is to agree with Jesus about the sin
and forsake it (1 John 1:7-9; Prov 28:13). We know that forsaking of the
sin is to take the form of the godly sorrow of 2 Cor 7:11 "For, behold,
this same thing, your being grieved according to God, how much
diligence it wrought in *you*, but what excusing of yourselves, but
what indignation, but what fear, but what ardent desire, but what zeal,
but what vengeance: in every way ye have proved yourselves to be
pure in the matter."

+++Jesus, by His Spirit in Paul, indicated how He wants us grieve over


such sin, so that with diligence, indignation, fear, ardent desire, zeal,
vengeance, and on account of and to avoid sexual immorality each
man would be having his own wife and each woman would be having
her own husband (1 Cor 7:2; 1 Thess 4:3-8). "9. but if they are not
exercising self-control they should already be married. . . . ". Jesus
solution for avoiding sexual immorality is not cold showers, fasting,
exercising and praying alone. Jesus ultimate solution for avoiding
sexual immorality is marriage, each man having his own woman and
each woman having her own man. So we see that the widows and
unmarried of 1 Cor 7:8,9 who are failing to exercise self-control are
under command to grieve and repent with diligence, indignation, fear,
ardent desire, zeal, and vengeance by finally getting married. The
question of who to marry is discussed below.

+++What does it mean to not be having self-control, to not be


exercising self-control?
9* But if they are not having<5736> control<1467> over themselves,
let them marry; for it is better to marry than to burn.

>>>But if they are not having<5736><<<<<


[<5736> Tense - Present, Voice - Middle or Passive Deponent,
Mood - Indicative, See 5791]

///This signifies an act or condition that is continuing on in the


present moment, e.g. she is breathing, she is having fun

>>>>>>>control<1467> over
themselves<<<<<<<<<<<<<<<<<
1467 egkrateuomai, middle voice; v
1) to be self-controlled, continent
1a) to exhibit self-government, conduct, one's self temperately
1b) in a figure drawn from athletes, who in preparing themselves
for the games abstained from unwholesome food, wine, and
sexual indulgence
But if they are not having<5736> control<1467> over themselves, . . .
---------------- being continent . . . .
-----------------exhibiting self-government . . . . .
---------------- abstaining from sex . . . . . .

///Having control over oneself is continuing in union with Jesus, keeping


on in practicing and living in His will, continuing to act righteously. Not
having control over oneself is failing to continue in union with Jesus,
failing to keep on practicing and living in His will, failing to continue to
act righteously.

This is the point where one knows he/she is not having control over
oneself, and must call on Jesus (Rm 10:17) to be saved from the sin,
agreeing with Jesus about one's sin (1Jn1:9), and yielding oneself to
Jesus for Him to work and will Godly sorrow and repentance of the sin
(Ph 2:13;4:13;Heb 13:20,21; Prov 28:13; 2 Cor 7). Part of the
repentance and godly sorrow (2Cor7) is to obey the command to get
married to deal with the problem. Why is such repentance so
important? One has lost control of oneself and is snared (2Tim2:22-26)
in sin when one habitually falls out of union with Jesus, practicing and
living sin. God will not allow His children to knowingly - (knowing that
what they are doing is declared to be sin explicitly and specifically in
the Bible) - keep on sinning, to continue on in sin, to practice and live
in sin (Hebrews 12:1-15; 1 Cor 5:1-11; 11:30ff).

1 John 3:6 No one who continues in union with Him keeps on practicing
and living in sin: no one who keeps on living in sin has seen Him or
knows Him. 7 Dear children, let no one lead you astray. The man who
continues acting righteously, practicing righteousness, is righteous,
just as He is righteous. 8 He who is habitually practicing and living in
sin is a child of the Devil, . . . . 9 No one who is a child of God habitually
practices and lives in sin. A God-given germ of life remains in him, and
he cannot habitually sin--because he is a child of God. 10 By this we
can distinguish God’s children and the Devil’s children: no one who
keeps on failing to act righteously is a child of God, nor he who does
not keep on loving his brother man. 1 John 3 WEY+TCNT+DBY

1 John 2: 3And this is how we may discern [daily, by experience] that


we are coming to know Him [to perceive, recognize, understand, and
become better acquainted with Him]: if we keep (bear in mind,
observe, practice) His teachings (precepts, commandments).
4
Whoever says, I know Him [I perceive, recognize, understand, and am
acquainted with Him] but fails to keep and obey His commandments
(teachings) is a liar, and the Truth [of the Gospel] is not in him. 5But
he who keeps (treasures) His Word [who bears in mind His precepts,
who observes His message in its entirety], truly in him has the love of
and for God been perfected (completed, reached maturity). By this we
may perceive (know, recognize, and be sure) that we are in Him:
6
Whoever says he abides in Him ought [as a personal debt] to walk and
conduct himself in the same way in which He walked and conducted
Himself. [AB]