"Here In HoIIand LLere Is deBnILeIy Iess

nILLIIIe vIoIence LLan In LLe UK. EuL oI

course, shit happens everywhere sometimes,
especIaIIy on LLe doors! EuL I am IearnIn
how to effectively deal with violence from
the books and videos of people like the great
0eoII TLompson, Lee MorrIson and JamIe
0`KeeIe, and oLLers.
The biggest problems door supervisors have
to face here, generally come from young
'wannabe' crImInaIs Irom Morocco, as weII as
roups oI ErILIsL LourIsLs... sorry my ErILIsL
readers! [Hey YurIy, no worrIes mosL oI LLe
trouble in the clubs and pubs around the UK,
in Spain and... well just about everywhere
eIse In LLe worId LLe ErILs IIke Lo o, comes
Irom us ErILs]. WLen I say ErILIsL LourIsLs,
I do noL mean nIce IookIn BLerIock HoImes
type of gentleman, but scummy looking
youths or even people in their thirties
dressed in Adidas sport clothes, shaven
heads, and some with a tattooed sparrow on
their hands. These guys are almost always
under LLe InBuence oI aIcoLoI, very rude and
obnoxious and you can often hear them say
those wonderful words: Do you know who I
am! or even: Do you know who my father
is! [Ed: 0L yes, we know LLe Lype YurIy! NIce
sort of chaps arent they? At the end of this I
have added a story I once wrote about this,
you mILL Bnd IL Iunny!]
Anyway, on a cold winters night a couple
oI weeks ao, one oI LLese ErILIsL scumbas
had assaulted my Turkish colleague on the
door. He Lad reIused LIm enLry because Le
was drunk, and the scumbag headbutted
my coIIeaue. EuL my coIIeaue quIckIy
recovered and ave LLe scumba a LerrIBc
right-hook, which was so powerful that the
scumba Bew Iew meLers across LLe road and
into the cold water of the canal opposite. And
then, would you believe, my colleague had to
pull him from the water, therefore saving the
scumbags life!
"Bome ErILs IIke Lo ceIebraLe bacLeIor's
parties and stag nights in Amsterdam, but
there arent any clubs that allow group of ten
to twenty drunken men in their venue, and so
you often see them walking around the good
old Red Light district, angry and frustrated
and IookIn Ior and aImosL cerLaInIy BndIn
LroubIe. However, bI roups oI drunken
women are welcome almost everywhere.
Strange that, isnt it!?
Actually bouncers in Amsterdam can really
relate well to the things about the doors that
0eoII TLompson, FobIn EarraLL [Ed: thanks
Yuriy!] and EIII Carson wrILe abouL, Iunny
stories, drunken idiots, death threats, gun
LLreaLs, BLLs, arumenLs, LLrowIn ouL
assholes, sad stories, disgusting stories, the
adrenaline rush and struggling to show no
fear and, of course, those bragging colleagues
that are almost always cowards when the
shit hits the fan!
Sometimes things happen that really makes
you think about the ways of the world! For
example, a young girl violently smashing the
head of another young girl on the toilet seat.
Was IL abouL a boy? I asked LLe Injured one,
Amsterdam
On the Doors

My name Is YurIy KaIIsLraLov, I am orIInaIIy Irom FussIa and over LLe pasL Iew
years . I Lave been IIvIn and workIn as a bouncer In AmsLerdam HoIIand and
just wanted to share some thoughts and feelings with my colleagues around the
worId readIn FobIn EarraLL's TouL TaIk, abouL doIn LLe doors In AmsLerdam.
in

after pulling them apart and throwing them

ouL oI LLe cIub. 'No' sLe saId, 'I was beIore Ler
in the queue to the toilet! She wanted to get
there before me!
"And anoLLer LIme durIn a HIp Hop F&E
party, we were pulling apart two black dudes
BLLIn. TLey puIIed LLeIr cLesLs ouLward
IIke a roosLers! 0ne oI LLem screamed: ' BLe's
my bILcL!' HIs Iady was smIIIn and IookIn
proud at what was happening, and I think
that for her the word bitch was a compliment
- music to her ears!
"WLaL a worId!
Sometimes tourists like to tell us about the
doormen in their own countries and one time
I remember was when we had a private party
- guest-list only. A large group of drunk Indian
or FakIsLanIIookIn men wanLed Lo come In,
but we refused them entry because they were
not on the guest-list. The head of the group
LoId me: 'How dare you noL IeL us In? I am a
ErILIsL cILIzen!' And preceded Lo sLow me LIs
ErILIsL passporL! I paLIenLIy expIaIned LIm
that is was nothing to do with his skin colour
or nationality, but it was a private party and
guest-list only. And then he said: All doormen
In EnIand are wankers, jusL IIke you!' He
continued to insult me until properly placed
bitch-slap changed his attitude, and the
roup BnaIIy moved away screamIn: 'AII
bouncers are wankers! I guess we have some
solidarity with other door supervisors from
other countries after all! [Ed: yes Yuriy, we
are all wankers, until the shit hits the fan
and we are needed, and then of course we are
brilliant... until it is all over, then we go back
to being wankers again, Im afraid!]
"Here In HoIIand LLere Is aIso an 'oIdscLooI
/ new school kind of thing. A few years ago,
somebody cauLL snIIBn cocaIne In LLe
restrooms would have had his head shoved in
LLe LoIIeL and BusLed Iew LImes. EuL now, a
doorman doIn LLIs wouId mosL deBnILeIy be
sued, arrested, and would lose his license for
sure. LIke IL Is In LLe UK now, we In HoIIand
also have a lot of stupid restrictive rules and
regulations, and must be very careful in what
we do or say. Bo LLe CLarIIe Eronson era Is
gone for good in Amsterdam as well!
I must say though, that a big difference
beLween LLe UK and HoIIand's nILLIIIe Is
the legal consumption of marihuana or hash,
which has generally made customers a lot
Iess aressIve. 0ver aII LLe years, and on aII
LLe doors I Lave worked Lere In HoIIand, no
one smoking joints has ever said such things
to me as; Do you know who I am! or I am
fucking your mother or I am gonna kick
your ass. Yet drunken people and people
taking cocaine do it all the time!
"EuL wLaLever we Lave Lo puL up wILL and
whatever happens to us on the doors, lets
always take our job seriously, lets do what
must be done, despite of our fear and stress
and most of all, lets have some fun on the
doors. And if you are in Amsterdam drop me
a line and well have beer together!
"CLeers Lo aII LLe bouncers around LLe worId!
*********************************
Yuriy is originally from Russia but now living
In AmsLerdam. He Is currenLIy workIn Ior
TLe EuIIdo AmsLerdam company wLo owns
few nightclubs, bars, hotel and coffee-shops
(selling legal soft drugs such as marihuana
and LasLIsL). He Las aIso worked LLe doors
In LLe IoIIowIn venues: CIub Up, CaIe De
KrIn, CIub FaIn, BLrand ZuId, FokerIj, Euro
Ear, EIends and Abraxas and Las provIded
security services to various major events
and festivals including the Amsterdam
EasLIon Week, LoveIand and CLemIsLry. He
has studied boxing, Aikido, JKD, Filipino
Kali Eskrima, Russian Systema, Kapap
Krav Maa and Hock HocLLeIm`s BcIenLIBc
EILLIn Conress. You can conLacL YurIy vIa
emaII: yurIyk71maII.ru
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