Your Children Need To Know
Estate planning lawyers
always encourage you to
establish estate planning
documents. We do it be-
cause we know first-hand
that those documents can
safeguard you, your fam-
ily and your nest egg.
But in my practice, the
encouragement does not
end when the ink is dry and Joseph S. Karp,
my clients walk out the C.E.L.A.
door. I strongly encourage clients to
share their plans with their loved ones,
with anyone who will be instrumen-
tal in carrying out their wishes. Yes,
those documents are the letter of the
law. But the spirit of the law and the
nitty-gritty details—well, those are
another thing. Your agents, trustees
and personal representatives need
# #
to know the entire picture.
Listen to Joe Karp with
Anita Finley on Saturday,
June 6 from 7:30-8:00 AM
on WSBR 740AM and on the
# #
Internet at www.wsbrradio.com.
Naturally, many clients resist.
They’ve spent a lifetime taking care
of themselves and nurturing their
children, so even a short discussion
on how they want their children to
take care of them can be uncomfort-
able. And the adult kids are compli-
cit in avoiding the discussion. Many
of my clients have heard comments
like, Oh mom, we don’t need to hear
about your accounts, you’re going to
live forever! or You’re in great shape,
don’t worry about that stuff! or We
drove a thousand miles with the grand-
kids to spend Thanksgiving with you,
and you want to talk about where to
find your brokerage statements if you
have a stroke? Let’s switch the topic,
shall we?
Remember the time your kids were
little and you just had to make them
listen to you? Well, now is another of
those times. Your children need to
know, if they are ever called upon to
step into your shoes, what your assets
are, where they are, and how to get to
them and where the key to the safe
deposit box is. If they have to start
paying your bills or mak-
ing expenditures on your
behalf, they should know
what funds to tap into first,
and which to hold onto.
Tell them if you’ve stashed
valuables anywhere; you’ll
sleep better knowing that
if anything happens to you,
the gold necklace you
stashed inside the sofa
won’t end up at Goodwill
along with the sofa.
Health care is another hot-button
issue you must address with your
children. No matter how expertly craft-
ed, no health care document can ever
cover every scenario, so it’s impor-
tant to spell out your values and
preferences. Case in point concerns
a friend of mine who I will call “Lynn.”
Lynn’s widowed mother lived across
the country from Lynn, close to Lynn’s
sister. After several years in assisted
living and ultimately a nursing home,
the mother became terminally ill and
was hospitalized. Mother’s health care
power-of-attorney appointed Lynn
and her sister as decision-makers.
Mother had a Living Will rejecting
life-extending procedures if she was
in a terminal state. But Lynn’s sister,
who was at the hospital every day, felt
that the Living Will did not preclude
a feeding tube. Lynn understood the
Living Will to mean her mother would
not have wanted one. A long-distance
battle ensued. Mom died after a few
weeks, but it’s only now, bitter argu-
ments and years later, that the siblings
are talking again. Perhaps if Lynn’s
mother had had an earlier heart-to-
heart with both her daughters about
these q ua lity o f l i f e i s s u es , t h e
conflict could have been eliminated
or minimized.
Joseph S. Karp is a nationally certified
and Florida Bar-certified elder law attorney
(C.E.L.A.) specializing in the practice of Trusts,
Estates and Elder Law. His offices are locat-
ed at 2500 Quantum Lakes Drive, Boynton
Beach; 2875 PGA Blvd., Palm Beach Gar-
dens; and 1100 SW St. Lucie W. Blvd., Port
St. Lucie. Call him at 561-752-4550 (Boyn-
ton); 561-625-1100 (Palm Beach Gardens);
or 772-343-8411 (Port St. Lucie). Toll-free
from anywhere: 800-893-9911. E-mail: KLF@
Karplaw.com or website www.karplaw.com