Kill safe kill clean

The corporate ninja’s guide to sanitary ninjutsu-based habits

Shuriken, snipers, poison, quarterly evaluations—

for protection from these and countless other threats, the modern ninja
relies on years of training in martial arts and corporate best practices.
Likewise, against infection, disease, and tailored killer bacteria, trust in
your secret ninja weapon: good personal hygiene!

Metaphorically, we’ve all got Your mask or cowl


blood on our hands

�
does NOT protect from
When metaphor becomes airborne viruses! Wear a
reality, use disposable surgical mask over your cowl.
latex gloves while handling Witnessing your target’s last
blood, sweat, saliva, breath should fill you with
miscellaneous excretions, pride, not tuberculosis.
organs, and brain matter.

Keep electronic devices virus-free—

all of them, not just the kind you attach to your

 victim’s extremities—by washing them regularly in

warm, soapy water. A clean gizmo is the way to go!


Bloodborne Seduction
R

diseases is the ninja’s

You’re exposed constantly, venerable tool
assuming you’re any good. Remember, only FDA-approved
For protection from sprays prophylactic latex can protect you
of blood and errant bodily from STDs, as well as from possible
fluids, use an ordinary paternity headaches down the line.
umbrella. Upgrade to Ancestral sharkskin provides dubious
Kevlar for protection protection and also chafes.
from small arms fire.

Management is not mistaken: G ood

Cleanliness can save your bacon! Ninja
Remember GNAT on every mission. Always
Hygiene keeps a ninja ninjin’! T idy

Copyright ©2009 Ninjalistics. Written by Greg Ingber.

Layout by Allen Varney. For further helpful counsel
in ISO 9000-compliant corporate espionage and
assassination, visit www.ninjalistics.com