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THE WOMAN WITH THE STRONG FEELING FOR JUSTICE, BUT ALSO KINDNESS (Vinko Vasle)

Brochure about Vlasta Nussdorfer, meeting with her and organization The White Ring of Slovenia. AUTHORS

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Tina Suban, Teja Nusdorfer, Klara Mezinec, Kaja Baler, Aleks Birsa Jogan, Mojca Uhernik Pipan, Anja Humar Korei 1

Tina Suban, Teja Nusdorfer, Klara Mezinec, Kaja Baler, Aleks Birsa Jogan, Mojca Uhernik Pipan, Anja Humar Korei

THE WOMAN WITH THE STRONG FEELING FOR JUSTICE, BUT ALSO KINDNESS (Vinko Vasle)
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VLASTA NUSSDORFER
Vlasta Nussdorfer is a woman with a great sense for justice, but also for kindness. It was the latter in particular which she has chosen as her life's mission to work towards a better world, to help the helpless, the poor, the underprivileged and those stricken with illness. She graduated from the Ljubljana Faculty for Vlasta Nussdorfer Law in 1977 and started her career as an intern at the District Public Prosecutor's Office in Ljubljana a year later. After successfully passing her bar exam in 1980 she took up office as deputy public prosecutor and later, after the reorganization of the public Prosecutor's office, as district state prosecutor. In 2002 she became the head of the juvenile, family and sex crimes department at the District State Prosecutor's Office in Ljubljana, and in 2003 she took up
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office as higher state prosecutor. She now works at the Supreme State Prosecutor's Office of the Republic of Slovenia. She presided over the Slovenian State Prosecutors Association for six years and founded the White Ring of Slovenia, a support organization for victims of criminals acts, where s the Secretary General. Professionally familiar with family abuse and child abuse, the darkest side of life, she has chosen to fight it as a Human Being who, although she believes in just punishment for offenders of the most deplorable crimes against sexual integrity, is also aware of the fact that victims need more than that: they need Vlasta Nussdorfer is signing her books. our protection and support on all levels. And that is what separates Vlasta Nussdorfer, the humanist, the woman who turned her professional experience into a pursuit of Good and Betterment. It is for this reason that she was
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nominated for Slovenian Woman of the Year, and in this role she launched the initiative A Gift for Life, whose purpose was to establish a database of ten thousand bone marrow donors in Slovenia. For this purpose, she spearheaded the establishment of two funds: the Hipokrat fund, where funds are collected for the donation ob bone marrow; and the Flame of Kindness fund, which provides financial support for victims of criminals acts. The proceeds from the book you hold in your hands will be used to help the victims and ensure their better future. All of these deeds testify to the character of Vlasta Nussdorfer, a woman who cares. Although hard to find, this virtue helps her turn misfortune into happiness, hate into love and evil into something noble and beautiful. On February the first in 2013 the National Assembly of Slovenia elected Vlasta Nussdorfer the Slovenian Ombudsman.
Vlasta Nussdorfer is taking an oath in the national Assembly of Slovenia.

THE WHITE RING OF SLOVENIA


I. About the Society. Each year thousand of people directly or indirectly become victims of criminal acts, meaning that lose a relative or are themselves injured, beaten, robbed, mugged, sexually abused, or victims of domestic violence. The logo of The White Ring of This could Slovenia happen tomorrow to anyone we know or care about. Following the example of many European countries, the White Ring of Slovenia was established on December 5, 2003. It is a non-profit society providing support for victims of criminal offences. Its objective is to join the European Forum for Victim Service whose members include organizations from Austria, Belgium, the Czech Republic, Finland, France, Germany, Hungary, Luxembourg,
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Holland, Portugal, Ireland, Sweden, Switzerland, Great Britain. Founded in 1999, the Forums key tasks are to provide effective support for victims of criminal acts, fair and just compensation for damages, active involutions, and exchanging experience and representation before other institutions, and exchanging experience and information between members of the forum in other in order to ensure the best practice and knowledge. II. The Societys Activities- its numerous activities providing psychosocial and legal support for victims of criminal offences, training programs for expert counsellors dealing with the victims, informing the public about the entire spectrum of available help, preventive action, drafting legislation proposals to improve the position of victims, protecting victim and informing them of their rights, collaboration with governmental and non-governmental organizations, material support for victims, networking with related societies integration in

the international network of support services for victims of criminal acts. III. Sources of funding The society main source of funding is the annual membership fee of EUR+ 12.50, but other options include gifts, bequeathals, donations, contributions and other sources. IV. Membership - currently, there are over 150 individuals involved in the society, including legal workers, doctors, psychiatrists, psychotherapists, social workers, politicians and other professions. There are also several other related societies involved, with years of experience with victims of abuse; they have become honorary members. V. Past activities- As part of our endeavours to provide better support for victims of child sexual abuse, two special rooms have been prepared where they can be questioned in a friendlier environment. The first was opened in The president of The Celje in March of 2004, White Ring of Slovenia Vlasta Nussdorfer and the second was
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opened in Trbovlje at the end of 2004. In 2005, we disbursed 1,000,000 SIT (EUR 4,100) in financial aid to victims of criminal acts. We also provided advice and organized numerous workshops on the subject of violence and sexual abuse. VI. Our plans- After setting up friendly rooms in the towns of Celje and Trbovlje, we added the town Krko to the list. It is our wish and expectation to have these kinds of rooms available in the police precincts. This is the only way for children to have equal opportunities during the process of questioning. As victims of criminal acts they are forced to discuss events that have affect them deeply in a highly stressful environment. These are rooms in police stations and in courts that have a special effect even on adult victims. In a friendlier environment with toys, drawings and music, children would find it easier to speak to experts and even other participants in the criminal proceeding, i.e. judges, prosecutors and defence attorneys who could monitor the situation from a different room and ask their questions from there. Children's advocacy services are also essential. It is the vision of a better future. We will endeavour to provide additional training for workers in the field of childcare, education, healthcare, etc. Only highly trained staff can effectively identify
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abuse and violence and provide assistance to the victims. The Flame of Kindness Fund was also established, which will collect the funds to provide complete assistance to the victims. On December 6 2005, the society's second anniversary, the book Our Little Match Girls was presented at the event held at the Faculty of Law in Ljubljana.

VII. An open invitation to become involved Come to us either as victims or experts, if you need help or if you wish to offer your help to others. There is another society that acts independently but works closely with us: SOS HELPLINE ASSOCIATION (DRUTVO SOS TELEFON) FOR ABUSED WOMEN AND CHILDREN

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MEETING WITH VLASTA NUSSDORFER


Within the Comenius project, we have to present a personality who has done or did a lot in the area of children's rights. We decided to invite among us Mrs Vlasta Nussdorfer, who has been helping abused children and other people in need for many years. The debate club at our school prepared some Converstion with Vlasta Nussdorfer questions for our guest and carried out the interview. Here is a short report of the meeting: Question: You have devoted your life and career to people in need. Why? Mrs. Nussdorfer: Since I remember, I have always noticed people in trouble and I've always felt a need to help them. Besides, I was born
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with the gift of speaking and I liked performing in public. And I strongly believe that every human being is talented for something and if you find a job that enriches you in your life, it is a blessing. The organization Beli Obro has been helping the victims of sexual and other kinds of abuse for nine years already. Mrs. Nussdorfer is planning to write her ninth book about the experiences with running this organization. She receives a lot of mail long confessions about terrible events that happen to people, especially women and girls. It is interesting that victims often cannot exit the circle of violence they experienced violent parents and they make partnerships with violent partners. Question: Which children's rights are most frequently violated? Mrs. Nussdorfer: Children often suffer inside a family, especially when the parents argue a lot or get divorced. Some parents succeed to establish a good communication even after the divorce, but most continue arguing and thus illtreat their children. A child suffers a lot when one of the parents tries to make him/her hate the other parent. It often happens that after a sexual abuse of a child inside a family, one of the parents is put in prison and the other would say to a child that he/she is guilty for reporting the imprisoned parent to the police.
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A lot of parents don't want to pay the alimony and it is very difficult for the parent who takes care of a child to survive. Question: How do you cope with terrible confessions you receive?

Members of the debate club and their teacher with Vlasta Nussdorfer

Mrs Nussforfer: A person who tries to help the victims of all kind of abuse must be strong and act very professionally. If you want to help, you shouldn't become a victim yourself. There are bitter moments, especially in the area of juvenile sex crime. Not everybody can work in this area. As a state prosecutor , she had to examine the victims and it was very shocking sometimes. When doing such a job, you have to be a very good listener and you have to be
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Mrs. Nussdorfer is an excellent interlocutor.

compassionate as victims are often suspicious and hardly confide in you. Question: Does the fact that you have been chosen as one of the ten most influential lawyers help you in running Beli Obro? Mrs. Nussdorfer: Of course it helps. People donate more. From my experiences, modest people are more generous than those who consider themselves to be important. They probably understand people in distress more. Very rich people don't often sympathize with the poor. Especially those, whose mouth are full of social issues and generosity are usually not very compassionate. And there is something else you need to consider when trying to help people:
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Some people refuse help. A person in need should decide himself/herself if he/she wants to be helped. Question: A lot of children suffer silently and supress the problems into their subconscious. What is a good relationship between children and parents? Mrs. Nussdorfer: There are different kinds of relationships: a) Families with no real conversation the relationships are cold, parents who hanker for money. A child in a rich family can be a victim, too! b) Families who maintain proper communication. In such families parents help the children when they are in trouble. Usually, children from this type of family grow into responsible adults. c) Families in which children are considered to be princes and princesses and spoilt immensely. This is very harmful for the child's development. A child has to take responsibility for his/her actions and he/she has to be patient. The family is very important. Teachers in schools can help form a child's personality, but it is the family that has to do the lion's share. Proper education can be carried out by responsible parents. Anybody can become a parent, but can anybody bring up a child? Question: What about social networks?
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Mrs. Nussdorfer: If used inappropriately, they can be very harmful. Nowadays children spend too much time on the internet. The virtual

Vlasta Nussdorfer answered the questions of parents, teachers and other participants

world is unreal. Besides, young people post a lot of personal data on these social networks. Are they aware that this data can never be removed? Internet can be of great help in studying, but do not overuse it. Question: How can parents help children to start living on their own?

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Mrs. Nussdorfer:A child needs to be equipped with all the necessary knowledge, he/she has to be able to cope with a pain and distress. Parents should not spoil children. If there is a shortage of money in a family, a child should understand the situation and behave economically. Parents should never become their children's slaves. Childre n should respect their parents and vice versa.

So, once again: good communication, responsibility, discipline, warmth and friendliness. These are the things that are important in a family.

Vlasta Nussdorfer receives a bunch of flowers.

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VLASTA NUSSDORFER'S STORIES


Vlasta Nussdorfer writes real stories about people whom she helped. We have copied one of these stories. Its title is Neli.
One of Vlasta Nussdorfer's books

A beautiful little girl was playing in the sandbox. The six-year-old came with her grandmother. She built some sandcastles, then went to play on the swing for a while, and then on the wooden playtrain. Her grandmother cheered her on. She handed her a peach and a poppy seed bun. Then they went to the vegetable market and then home. Grandfather was sitting in the room. He was always reading a newspaper or a book. He didn't care about anyone. Grandmother told her what was a bit
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NELI

strange, and that he was a little sick, too. They never told her what was wrong with him. Grandmother made lunch and they all sat down at the table and chatted for a little bit. Then the doorbell rang and mommy came to pick her up. Neli flew in her arms and they went home. Daddy and her brother were there. They talked a lot, they played, watched TV, and entertained guests, they loved each other dearly. They were a proper happy family. Neli went to school, the big one, just like her older brother. She was doing well. She met her classmates, and she liked Petra the most. She lived on the next street. She was an only child. It wasnt long before they started walking home from school together. There were no roads on the way, anyway. Just a few side alleys. They had the time of their lives when they were at home. Petras family had a little fluffy dog called Taka. As soon as they put the key in the lock, she would run up to greet them, barking with joy.
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She smelled them, licked their hands and played with their school bags. She tore up Petras mathematics workbook one day but they bought her a new one. She wanted a doggy of her own, too. She wrote to Santa and Father Frost, but they didnt bring her one. She became inseparable with Petra; they would see each other in school and after school, too. Then the school holidays came. The very first ones! Because their parents were at work, they decided to spend the first week with Nelis grandparents. Petras grandparents lived far away, in the countryside. They packed their clothes and toys and went to grandma Mila and grandpa Tonko. They took the adorable Taka along, too. They slept in a beautiful guestroom. They had a pillowfight. They had so much fun! Taka slept under Petras bed. She lay there quiet and still, occasionally crawling out from under it to lick their feet. Wrapped up in a blanket, they waited for grandma Mila to come in the room. They were pretending to be asleep and when she came up quietly to wake them up, they jumped at her and gave her a real scare! They wanted out to the garden with her to pick the sweet strawberries and nibble on the homegrown carrots. They also picked some flowers to put in the vase. And then they brushed each others hair, put on grandmas earrings, giggled and enjoyed every second. In
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the afternoon, Nelis mummy came over. She brought a whole bunch of candy and fruit, chatted for a while with grandma and grandpa, then left. Then, grandma went to watch her beloved daytime drama. She told them not to disturb her, and then she sighed and ranted and shed a tear here and there. They thought those shows were so silly. Grandpa was in his room. Doesnt he ever get bored from all that reading? So the day passed and they were back in bed after supper and a bath. Grandma tucked them in and told them she wasnt feeling very well and that she was going to go to bed early. But they werent sleepy yet. They talked and talked late into the night, making plans for the coming day. Such a beautiful friendship this is! Suddenly, Taka stirred. Grandpa came in the room. Neli was pretending to be asleep. The moonlight lit up the room well enough for her to
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see him pull the blanket of Petra and started to take off her clothes. He pulled her pyjamas down to her knees and started to fondle her down there. Petras chest rose and fell slightly, but she was fast asleep. Grandpa lifted up her and kissed her on the neck and chest. And suddenly he started to take off his own clothes, too. She saw him touching his willy, it looked so strange and it was getting bigger. And he was breathing heavily. He was still touching Petra, fondling her the he knelt by the bed and started to put his willy between Petras legs. Suddenly she was afraid he might do something to her and she twitched. Then he stepped up on her. Naked from the waist down, with that thing sticking outhe was making sure she was asleep. She started to snore a little to convince him. She was so scared! And then he lifted up her over her face, so she couldnt see him anymore. She was hardly breathing . He started to kiss herpeepee, breathing heavily as he did. He rubbed against her body, then put a finger inside her an it started to hurt. She moved and
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he stopped for a moment, but then started again. She wanted to shout out, Granny, granny, help me! Please! But she didnt make a sound. And then felt him pushing inside her. He touched her chest and belly he did so. She was completely stuff, like she was dead. She wanted to leave her body and get away from him. He made a slimy puddle on her belly, then wiped it off and left the room. He quietly closed the door behind him. She looked at Petra, and she was asleep. She felt sick in her belly. She left a tightness in her chest. She touched her belly. It was sticky and she felt a searing pain down below, it burned and hurt. She asked herself what it was. She doesnt like him touching her there, she doesnt like looking at that ugly body of his. Or at that willy. And he was panting and shaking. Suddenly she hated her, immensely. Grandfather Tonko and her sleeping grandmother. And her parents who have to work. The next morning she went to the bathroom and she couldnt stop washing her self. Her grandmother yelled, Neli, what are you doing? Were waiting for you! Breakfast is
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ready! How much water do you need? Stop washing yourself, you must be clean by now! She came downstairs. She wanted to tell her granny. But how? They wouldnt believe her, they wouldnt understand. She was carrying a heavy burden inside. She didnt feel like playing anymore, and she didnt care for Petra and Taka anymore, they didnt protect her from him. She just kept on sleeping, she didnt even bark. A real dog would have bitten him. She was mad at the whole world. That afternoon, her mother came she brought fruit and candy again. She didnt want them. She hugged her tightly and said, Mommy, I wanna go home with you. But Mommy just looked at her and said, Neli, you cant, Daddy and Mommy have to work. Dont you like staying with Grandma and Grandpa? she didnt wait for reply. She kissed her cheek and rushed out. Neli started to hate her. How could she do this to her? If she was a good mommy, shed see that she was unhappy and that she wanted to leave this place, to go with her. She didnt see her grandfather all day. He was in his room again and She wanted to take Taka-no, their neighbours dog Lord in that room so it would bite that thing off. She was afraid to go sleep. She wondered if it would happen again. She didnt let Petra go to sleep. She talked and talked and woke Grandma up. She came in the room, annoyed, and said,
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Girls, go to sleep. Its late! Neli took the chair and leaned it against the door so it would make a noise if he opened the door at night. She didnt sleep much that night, she was always looking towards the door and at Taka and Petra, both fast asleep. She could hardly get up in the morning. Grandma leaned down over the bed and asked her: Whats the matter, Neli? You look so tired. But she just stayed in bed all day. Flashing before her eyes were the horrific images of her grandfather, of his greasy, sweaty body, his panting and that willy of his. Would anyone save her? She kept asking herself. They all came in the room, but he wasnt there. Dirty old man, he cant even show his face. Her mommy came, then her daddy and brother. They took her home. She didnt care for Petra either. Why didnt she wake up? she asked herself. When they came home, she just kept staring at the wall. Her tummy hurt and she didnt feel like eating. Everybody kept asking what was wrong. When she was alone with mommy, she started to cry and she told her everything. Sobbing, crying, in total desperation. She saw her mothers eyes and the tears were running down her cheeks. Then she heard her yelling to her daddy, That bastard, the pig, how could he do this to our baby! Her father started to avoid her. She didnt see her grandma for a long time, and she never saw grandpa again. Mommy took her to a
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big grey building. There was a nice lady there, and she asked her to tell her what happened. She pointed at the rag dolls and told her to pretend that one of them was grandpa and other one was her. She threw grandpa to the floor immediately. Then the hard days came. They didnt think talk much at home, mommy was hysterical, her brother was asking her what shed done wrong, and daddy grew distant. One day, grandma came by and hissed at her, You little brat, why did you make up story? What has Grandpa ever done to you? Hes so good. Cant you see hes ill? You should be ashamed people lies!

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QUESTIONNAIRE ABOUT CHILDREN'S RIGHTS IN SLOVENIA


QUESTIONNAIRE
Please, take a few minutes and fill in the survey for the Comenius project. Thank you.
1. Do you think thatchildren's rights are often violated in Slovenia? Yes No

2. Label the rights with numbers from 1-8 according to the frequency of their violation . The right to family The right to education The right to protection from abuse The right to freedom of speech and thought The right to health care
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The right to privacy The right to play The right to food and water Other: _________________

3. In your opinion, why are children's rights violated? ______________________________________ ______________________________________ ______________________________________ ______________________________________

4. Where do you think the rights are most frequently violated? At home At school or kindergarten At relatives Other: ________________

5. Do you know any organizations that help the children?


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Yes No

If yes, can you name the organizations? ______________________________________ ______________________________________

6. In your opinion, who is the person that has done the most in the field of children's rights? ______________________________________ ______________________________________

7. What do you think our society should do to prevent or at least reduce the violation of children's rights? ______________________________________ ______________________________________ ______________________________________ ______________________________________

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THE ANALYSIS OF THE SURVEY


1. Do you think thatchildren's rights are often violated in Slovenia? Yes - 31 No- 28

2. Label the rights with numbers from 1-8 according to the frequency of their violation . The right to family : 17 The right to education: 12 The right to protection from abuse : 33 The right to freedom of speech and thought : 25
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The right to health care: 10 The right to privacy: 24 The right to play: 14 The right to food and water: 3 Other: 2

3. In your opinion, why are children's rights violated? Some children are not obedient Some parents are too strict
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Some adults take advantage of their social position Parents take decisions without considering children's opinions children children

schools

4. Where do you think the rights are most frequently violated? At home: 33 At school or kindergarten: 30 At relatives : /

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Other: 5

5. Do you know any organizations that help the children? Yes: 27 No: 31

If yes, can you name the organizations? Beliobro: 19 The association of children's friends: 1 Karitas : 3 Unicef: 1 Red Cross: 2
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6. In your opinion, who is the person that has done the most in the field of children's rights? VlastaNussdorfer: 22 ZdenkaebaekTravnik: 1 Pedro Opeka: 1 Ivan Kramberger: 1 My Mum: 1 My neighbour: 1

7. What do you think our society should do to prevent or at least reduce the violation of children's rights? More severe penalties for the offenders
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We should increase control over violation asures to protect children More empathy More love among people

people aware of violations about their problems children talk about children's rights in public would take control over violations

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CONTENTS
Vlasta Nussdorfer page 3 The White Ring of Slovenia page 6 Meeting with Vlasta Nussdorfer page 11 Vlasta Nussdorfer's stories page 18 Questionnaire about children's rights in Slovenia page 27

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Publisher O Antona ibelja Stjenka Komen Publishing 20 copies Texts typed by Tina Suban Klara Mezinec Teja Nusdorfer Kaja Baler Mojca Uhernik Pipan Literature NUSSDORFER, V. Our little match girls. Ljubljana: Zavod Meta, 2007 Text about the meeting and questionnaire Mojca Uhernik Pipan Text on the last page Aleks Birsa Jogan Editor Aleks Birsa Jogan Graphic design Aleks Birsa Jogan Proofreader Mojca Uhernik Pipan

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Vlasta Nussdorfer is really a woman with the strong feeling for justice, but also kindness. She founded the organization The White Ring of Slovenia, which helps victims of sexual abuse. She also writes books. In these books are the true stories about victims of sexual abuse. One of these stories is the story entitled Neli, which we have copied in our brochure. We also organized a meeting with Vlasta Nussdorfer. The conversation was very interesting. At our school we also carried out questionnaire about childrens rights in Slovenia and we analysed the answers.

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