Professional Documents
Culture Documents
©MAY 2009
Authored by Christina Kyprianou, MBA 2009
Babson College
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TABLE OF CONTENTS
V. Conclusion ………………………………………………………………………………...16
References….………………………………………………………………………………………18
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Authored by Christina Kyprianou, MBA 2009
Babson College
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ABSTRACT
Coaching in general can prove to be a more productive and impactful process if coachees
engage in it in a well-planned and intentional manner. A coaching relationship is a two-
way street. Both coach and coachee need to be engaged, vested and committed to creating
the desired changes. The coaching profession has placed emphasis on developing and
training good coaches but little attention is usually paid to what makes a good coachee.
However, it is not adequately and often enough stressed that being a coaching client
comes with obligations. At the executive level, a coachee’s commitment to the coaching
process becomes even more important if obvious and lasting results are to be made. This
article serves as a guide to those considering hiring an executive coach or currently
working with one. It aims at helping coachees realize their own responsibilities and actions
that can make-or-break a coaching relationship. It can also help increase the success of
coaching relationships which ultimately increases satisfaction of both coaches and their
clients.
I. METHODOLOGY
This research article was written as part of a graduate independent research project with
the purpose of creating a practical guide for anyone considering hiring or currently
working with an executive coach. Ultimately, this study aims at helping both coaches and
coachees engage in more successful and fulfilling coaching relationships. The research
carried out focuses on executive coaching although most of the content is applicable in
other types of coaching.
Primary research was carried out through in-person and phone interviews with twenty
three individuals. Twelve of them have coached at some point in their careers on a full-
time basis or are currently full-time executive coaches. Their clients have been mid- to
senior-level executives as well as entrepreneurs. A couple of these coaches work primarily
with director-level executives. Three additional individuals have served as informal
executive coaches. They do not necessarily call themselves coaches but their work with
executives, entrepreneurs and owner-managers has many coaching aspects to it. The
majority of executive coaches interviewed have had more than ten years of experience in
the field while only a couple have recently transitioned to the coaching profession.
Although new to the coaching profession, these individuals have had years of experience
as informal or part-time coaches, lawyers, human resource professionals and practicing
psychologists.
Of the twenty three interviewees, eight have been solely on the coachee’s seat and have all
worked with executive coaches. It is also worth noting that half of all coaches interviewed
have had a formal coach themselves at some point in their careers. Several coaches also
report to have had various informal coaches, usually people who have mentored and
guided them throughout the years.
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Authored by Christina Kyprianou, MBA 2009
Babson College
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Lastly, the interview questions intended to identify the characteristics and personality
traits of good coachees as well as questions that need to be addressed when hiring a coach.
In the 1960’s and 1970’s, coaching existed as a form of developmental counseling. Its
popularity took off in the 80’s and continued through the mid-90’s. An expanding global
marketplace and increasingly complex business problems created opportunities for
coaching to flourish. Since the mid-90’s, coaching has maintained its popularity but its
growth has slowed down. Executive coaching today remains a popular tool both for
professionals and organizations. According to the American Management Association’s
study on executive coaching in 2008, coaching is used by about half of today’s
organizations and its popularity is expected to increase.
Opportunities for working with a coach can arise when one wants to develop new skills in
one’s current or future job, improve overall performance, or achieve specific business
results1. Based on the goals it strives to achieve, executive coaching can also be described
in two ways: remedial or developmental. It is common, however, for the two to overlap
and interact. Remedial coaching refers to the traditional type of executive coaching which
aims at correcting individual behavior that hurts the entire organization. In the past,
remedial coaching was equivalent to trouble. As a result, coachees did not view it
favorably and faced it with resistance. As coaching’s popularity as a leadership
development tool increased, so did its acceptance. Today, most coaching is developmental
in nature. Organizations use executive coaching to retain and develop their best talent,
plan for succession, correct, help employees face challenges of international assignments
and assess their career development. Nonetheless, coaching is still used to correct habits
that can limit one’s leadership potential. Coaching helps coachees put the brakes on
strenghts taken too far, understand how they are viewed by others and increase one’s self
awareness with the purpose of adopting healthier habits2.
1
Goldsmith, Marshall, Lyons, Laurence, and Freas, Alyssa, (2000). Coaching for Leadership, Pfeiffer.
2
Coaching - A Global Study of Successful Practice, (2008). American Management Association.
Available at www.amanet.org.
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Authored by Christina Kyprianou, MBA 2009
Babson College
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- during transitional phases such as transitioning to a new company, a new role within a
company or changing careers
- when professionals relationships were strained or needed improvements such as tension
with bosses, clashes with colleagues or need for more effective ways of managing
subordinates
- when an organization wanted to identify and develop a future leader or successor.
The benefits for coachees are numerous but a general consensus exists among the coachees
interviewed. They report a higher degree of clarity, confidence and focus as a result of
coaching. Most importantly, they admit having the ability to deal with challenges that
would have otherwise been paralyzing. An entrepreneur mentioned that a coach helped
him be more motivated and energetic when tackling all the problems of his business. “I
now spend less time worrying about my surroundings and more time taking action” he
said. Another coachee identified the benefits of coaching in the structure and discipline her
coach put around the process of overcoming various work-related obstacles. Several
coachees find value in the accountability that coaching creates for them. Coachees find that
having deliverables and someone to report to on a regular basis who is focused entirely on
them and their goals, listens and guides them along the way gives them an extra push to
make the necessary changes. The consensus from the coaches’ side is that coaching opens
the door to new perspectives and new ways of thinking. Getting to the point where a
coachee can see and act on challenges in new and more productive ways can be a lengthy
and trying process. Nonetheless, every single one of the interviewees would recommend
coaching to others – a testament to coaching’s effectiveness and popularity.
When Strengths are Taken too Far – Behaviors that Derail Executives
Robert Hogan in his book Personality and the Fate of Organizations identifies eleven personality
factors that can be both strengths and shortcomings especially in leadership positions. One
objective executive coaching clients often have is learning how to capitalize on their strengths
while controlling the tendency to overdo them.
Note: Table taken from Hogan, Robert, (2006). Personality and the Fate of Organizations, p. 132 Lawrence
Erlbaum Associates.
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Authored by Christina Kyprianou, MBA 2009
Babson College
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III. DOING YOUR PART - SETTING THE STAGE FOR A SUCCESSFUL COACHING
RELATIONSHIP
A coaching relationship is exactly it: a relationship between a good coach and a good
coachee. Results are never guaranteed even when you hire the best coach. In fact, the
results attributed to coaching are directly related to the level of effort a coachee invests in
the process. Coachees can increase the success of a coaching relationship by thinking about
the following questions and taking into account the recommendations in this article.
Am I coachable?
The consensus is that not everybody is coachable. The ‘uncoachables’ often do not think
they have a problem, they are unhappy in their jobs and are convinced they have no way
out and think everyone else is the problem. In such cases, coaching cannot produce any
positive results, and their mindset does not allow them to reflect on their own behavior or
change it4. Our research suggests that uncoachable individuals are also ones who are
limited in their development because they are dealing with personal issues which may not
be adequately handled through coaching. Furthermore, individuals who are forced into
coaching by their organization and thus see no reason to be coached are also uncoachable.
Coachability does not necessarily exhibit the opposite attributes. Interviews with coaches
and coachees revealed certain common themes around people’s ability to own the
coaching process. Coachable individuals are:
Committed to change. Individuals who have a strong motivation to improve, do not think
they are perfect, welcome and are not afraid of change, take responsibility for outcomes in
their lives, place themselves out of their comfort zones and are disciplined about the
changes they want to make are usually the ones that are able to change themselves for the
better.
Able to open up and communicate. Coaching will be successful only if coachees are willing
to share and be honest in their discussions with their coach especially when it comes to
3
Goldsmith, Marshall, (2007). What Got You Here Won’t Get You There: How Successful People Become
Even More Successful, Hyperion.
4
Goldsmith, Marshall, (2009/ March). How to Spot the "Uncoachables”, Ask the Coach, Harvard Business
Publishing. Available at
http://blogs.harvardbusiness.org/goldsmith/2009/03/how_to_spot_the_uncoachables.html.
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Authored by Christina Kyprianou, MBA 2009
Babson College
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their shortcomings. They also have to be willing to engage in discussions about topics that
may often be uncomfortable but can nonetheless hamper their professional development.
Open to feedback. Individuals who are willing and able to listen to constructive criticism,
overcome their defensiveness and listen not only to their coach’s suggestions but also their
own insights are more likely to benefit from coaching.
Self- aware of themselves and others. Coachable individuals have a fair amount of insight
about them, are able to reflect on their own behavior and its impact on their environment.
Emotional intelligence is a characteristic of highly effective leaders5- an attribute that can
be developed over time. Coaching aims at developing one’s emotional intelligence through
increased self awareness.
Open to new ideas. A great part of coaching is looking at yourself and your environment
from a perspective other than your own. Therefore, coachable individuals are willing to
learn from others and see value in getting an outsider’s perspective to a situation.
An executive described coachable individuals as those who “have clear goals and
remember their dreams. They are constantly working towards achieving those goals”.
Speak up about what works for you. It is also important to have a conversation with your
coach about aspects of coaching that may or may not be working for you. One of the
coaches interviewed suggested that journaling was not always the best way to get his
clients to reflect between coaching sessions. He had to find alternatives that worked for
different clients, their time limitations and learning style. If your time is extremely limited,
ask if you can complete some of your assignments during the coaching session or whether
your coach can help you find practical ways to incorporate assignments in your schedule.
Do not cancel meetings. A simple suggestion but critical one is not to cancel coaching
sessions last minute. Asides from being financially liable for them, you will also be
signaling that coaching is not a priority for you. If, in fact, you are finding it difficult to
commit to the meetings and homework, rethink whether coaching or the timing of it is
right for you.
Set each session’s agenda. Be prepared in every session to discuss the coaching agenda for
the day and the goals you want to achieve by the end of it. Your coach will spend time on
discussing your progress since the previous session but the session should be largely
driven by you.
5
Sparrow, Tim and Knight, Amanda, (2006). Applied EI, Wiley.
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Authored by Christina Kyprianou, MBA 2009
Babson College
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Be open to feedback. Be open to both positive and negative feedback. Most importantly, be
ready to act on it! If coaching does not entail action based on feedback you receive both
from your coach and other parties involved, it is unlikely you will see any lasting results.
Reluctance to take action also signals you may not be ready for coaching. Remember that
getting to the desirable results may be a lengthy and rocky road but well worth the effort.
The ride may be slightly easier if you consider that coaching provides a rare occasion
when someone is entirely focused on you and your goals in a confidential and risk-free
environment.
Manage your own expectations. Be reasonable and understand that the coach has other
obligations. Furthermore, do not try to get your money’s worth by asking your coach to
help you reach as many goals as possible. As in life, spreading yourself too thin and
overburdening others will eventually bring the opposite results. Several coaches spoke to
the subject of ‘firing’ clients either because there was not a good fit or coachees had
unrealistic expectations of them.
The executive coaches interviewed were asked to identify groups of individuals whose
coaching needs followed a pattern or theme.
Entrepreneurs vs. Corporate Executives. The consensus was that entrepreneurs have
different coaching needs than corporate executives. Entrepreneurs face challenges
balancing their professional and personal lives and thus coaching often wanders in the
realms of life coaching. “Entrepreneurs are also more willing to try new things and their
lives are in the middle of it all. There’s more emotion”, a coach said. On the other hand,
corporate executives have more difficulties navigating the politics of their organizations
and figuring out their next steps.
Women vs. Men. Another finding was that women tend to seek coaching on how to
navigate male-dominated environments and how to deal with the expectations
organizations have of them that can often be different from those of men. Women are
generally more open to coaching and tend to do better than men in developing the
relationships needed to reach their goals. “Women see power differently, use
relationships and collaborate. Women leaders can teach men leaders to be more effective
and build cohesiveness and collaboration. It’s not a gender thing but women have been
socialized in certain ways”, said an executive coach.
Cross-cultural coaching. Although data was not conclusive on this subject, certain
coaches suggested that coaching needs as well as approaches may vary from culture to
culture. An executive coach noticed that women of a particular culture were less willing
to open up to their coach which tends to be the opposite in the American culture. On the
other hand, another coach who works primarily with Americans has found that women
take longer before getting comfortable discussing their personal lives than his male
clients do.
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Authored by Christina Kyprianou, MBA 2009
Babson College
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and frequency of sessions at least at the beginning. As you get closer to your goals, you
will probably have more flexibility around scheduling. A commitment of 3 to 6 months is
usually the minimum and one year is fairly standard. Shorter or longer engagements will
depend on your goals and your coach. Almost all of the interviewees said that the duration
of a coaching relationship is not etched in stone; in fact, many end up evolving into long-
term relationships and friendships.
What will success look like for me at the end of the coaching engagement?
Think about what you want to be doing better or differently. What would your behavior
look like once coaching ends? Also think about what you want to get out of the coaching
process. A coachee told us that good coachees appreciate the process of coaching rather
than getting fixated on the end result. At the same time, be realistic about the time it takes
to make great leaps in changing long-standing habits especially if you tend to be your
toughest critic.
What you Need to Know When Executive Coaching is Initiated and Funded by your Company
What are the most important goals I want to achieve through coaching?
Focus on a maximum of 2 to 3 goals. Narrowing the scope of your efforts increases your
chances of creating lasting change. Having a general idea of what you want to achieve is
sufficient while your coach’s job is to help you flash out all the details. What you need to
identify is what you are willing to change right now; not a few months down the road or
when you find free time. You will always have a busy life and a myriad of competing
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Authored by Christina Kyprianou, MBA 2009
Babson College
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priorities. Change will not come about unless you accept that your life will always be
hectic. It is up to you to make time for what is important.6
Revise when necessary. Since coaching is geared towards helping you make changes that
you most need, you can always revise your goals if and when you see fit. Make sure you
discuss any changes with your coach so you are in sync. If you discover issues that ‘change
the game’, you may also realize that your coach’s ability to help you changes as well. In
such instances, evaluate whether your coach is still a good fit for you and have an honest
discussion about how or if she can help you any further.
Knowing how to find the right coach and what to expect from formal coaching
relationships creates the foundation for a successful experience. The following questions
were common among coachees and recommended by coaches interviewed.
When deciding on a good fit, ask the coach about her philosophy of coaching. It is
important to understand how she approaches the coaching relationship and whether it
resonates with you. Always bear in mind that no coach will do the work for you. “Too
many people think that a coach - especially an accomplished one - will solve their
problems. That’s like thinking that you’ll get in shape by hiring the world’s best trainer
and not by working out yourself.”7
Understand your own learning style. Find a coach whose style is compatible with yours. In
their book the Alpha Male Syndrome, Erlandson and Ludeman describe how alpha males
see coaching as a “touchy-feely fad with little substance, like aromatherapy and they are
about as eager to be coached as they are to cut their salaries”. Such individuals tend to
work better with coaches who are not afraid to stand up to them, challenge them and “hit
them between the eye” according to a coach interviewed. A coachee mentioned that she
likes working with her coach because he ‘kicks her butt’ and tells her to think like a
business woman instead of a girl. On the other hand, you may work better with a coach
who does not take the process too seriously and gives you opportunities to laugh at
yourself. Pay attention to what works for you best.
6
Goldsmith, Marshall, (2008/September). Become a More Effective Leader by Asking One Tough
Question, Ask the Coach, Harvard Business Publishing. Available at
http://blogs.harvardbusiness.org/goldsmith/2008/09/become_a_more_effective_leader.html.
7
Goldsmith, Marshall, (2004/October). It's Not About the Coach, 120, Fast Company.
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Authored by Christina Kyprianou, MBA 2009
Babson College
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you can have a ‘trial’ period of one to two months before committing to a coach for longer.
Usually the first session is complementary so you can do your research at no cost. Friends
and colleagues can also be a great source for references. Lastly, ask your coach about her
experience in similar settings, her clients, methodology, training, and anything that is
important to you. Always keep in mind that no one person may be able to help you with
all your goals - there may be a different coach for different issues or different phases of
your life.
If you are unsure about the commitment you can make to coaching, you can always look for
coaching opportunities from informal coaches such as peers, seasoned professionals in your
industry, people who ask good questions and are not attached to your issues, people in
your network who may have been in situations similar to yours and ‘internal coaches’, i.e.
senior managers in your organization that are not direct supervisors.
In order to engage in informal coaching successfully, you have to create the necessary
conditions for people such as your peers or subordinates to give you feedback. If you do not
make clear to them that feedback can be given without retribution, then there is no use in
asking for any. If feedback is associated with risks, then be sure that no one will offer it
freely or honestly.
Clarify what information gets shared and with whom. When your boss or HR department
is involved in the coaching process, clarify what information gets shared with them and
8
Coutu, Diane and Kauffman, Carol, (2009/January). What Can Coaches Do for You?, Harvard
Business Review.
9
Hart, Wayne E. and Kirkland, Karen, (2001). Using your executive coach, Center for Creative Leadership.
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Authored by Christina Kyprianou, MBA 2009
Babson College
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what stays confidential. Most coaches will not disclose specific information about the
coachee without the coachee’s permission. There are times when a conversation will occur
among the coach, the coachee and the coachee’s boss. In such cases, the content of the
discussion is defined by the coachee but you should prepare for such meetings in
collaboration with your coach. It is important to note that having a three-way relationship
or a counterpart to whom you report (could be other than your boss) regarding your
progress has proved to be more effective than simply working with your coach on your
own10. A few coachees I interviewed suggested that such arrangements create
accountability on your part and help you keep coaching a priority even when work gets
hectic.
Disclose enough information to help your coach help you. Open and honest
communication is vital for coaching to be effective. You should disclose information you
think may affect your coach’s ability to help you reach your goals no matter how personal
they may be. At the same time, keep in mind that your coach is not necessarily a therapist.
Therefore, certain issues such as ones deeply rooted in your past may be useful for your
coach to know but not necessarily your coach’s job to help you overcome them.
Coaching and therapy are often confused and often considered competing professions.
However, each one is different in its approach and has different types of goals. A simple
way to distinguish the two is to think of therapy as a tool that helps one deal with the past
while coaching is goal-oriented and focuses on one’s future.
10
Goldsmith, Marshall, Lyons, Laurence, and Freas, Alyssa, (2000). Coaching for Leadership, Pfeiffer.
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Authored by Christina Kyprianou, MBA 2009
Babson College
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tell you that there is no right or wrong answer; simply one that is best for you. What you
get is guidance to find that answer yourself.
Confidentiality and no hidden agenda. Expect your coach to treat your relationship with
the utmost discretion and create a safe for environment for your professional
development. Again, be wary if confidentiality is not guaranteed.
Honesty and professionalism. Coaches are expected to be honest the same way you are
expected to tell the truth. Their job is to offer the truth in ways that you can reflect on it.
Ultimately, a good coach will lead by example.
Active listening. A coach is above all someone who listens even to your craziest ideas.
An objective voice and a sounding board. A good coach is someone who does not judge or
impose her own opinions on you but someone who serves as an impartial party.
When your problems remain. If you feel you are not resolving problems you set to solve
despite your efforts and time, it may be best to let your coach go. You may need to work
with a different coach who is a better fit. If your problems are reoccurring, stemming from
your personal life or rooted in past experiences then working with a different type of
counselor may bring more tangible results.
When the cookie-cutter approached is used on you. When your coach is using only one
technique and does not customize the coaching session to your goals, look for someone
else who can cater to your individual needs. A coachee I interviewed said “I knew I
needed to walk away when I realized she was using a cookie-cutter approach. After each
session, I felt I could do it better myself”.
If you are consistently ‘faking it’. If you find yourself lying to your coach about doing
your homework and if you cancel sessions on a frequent basis, it may be a sign your
formal coaching relationship has come to an end.
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Authored by Christina Kyprianou, MBA 2009
Babson College
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Keep in touch. Coaches have an innate desire to help people and are thus interested in
knowing that you have reached your destination. Many coachees keep in touch with their
coaches on an informal basis, which can also keep your coach adequately informed should
you decide to have a follow-up session.
Organization may choose to use internal coaches because lower cost, or because these
individuals already know the organization well and can bring insight to the coachee’s
challenges that an executive coach cannot (Hunt & Weintraub 2007). Internal coaching is also
a way for organizations to develop a coaching culture in which managers are also coaches.
However, internal coaching poses other challenges. Internal coaches often face the challenge
of balancing their other roles and their coaching responsibilities. The degree to which
confidentiality and objectivity can be maintained is another challenge (Hunt & Weintraub
2007). Furthermore, internal coaches may not be as effective at the executive level as
confidentiality becomes extremely important at those ranks. According to a survey
conducted by the American Management Association and the Institute for Corporate
Productivity Coaching in 2008, organizations tend to use internal coaches – and find them
more effective – for supervisors and middle-level managers rather than executives.
V. CONCLUSION
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Authored by Christina Kyprianou, MBA 2009
Babson College
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Some individuals are more coachable than others based on various personality traits.
Coachees who are more likely to gain the most out of coaching are know themselves well
and know where they want to head, are open to receiving feedback, have a desire to learn
from others, always find room for improvement and above all are proactive about putting
it all into action. Potential coachees can follow some of the guidelines mentioned in this
article to ensure first they are ready for coaching and become informed about their role in
engaging in a successful coaching relationship. More importantly, some or all of these
guidelines can help one find the coach and create the experience that fits one’s needs.
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Authored by Christina Kyprianou, MBA 2009
Babson College
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REFERENCES
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Authored by Christina Kyprianou, MBA 2009
Babson College
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