Assignment One Reflection Jacob Shaw September 19, 2013

In assignment one I believe I demonstrated several strengths and weaknesses when it came to the figured world of Fretwell. My observations are strong and the details that I include are accurate and detailed so that my readers feel like they are sitting with me in the Fretwell caf. One strong observation is The caf phone just started to ring for the first time since I have been in the Fretwell Caf. Of the remaining 5 students diligently working on their laptops all but one looked up when the phone began to ring. The phone seems to be a distracting noise in a place like this caf where silence is key. My observation displays my ability to distinguish between the various aspects of the figured world and how it is portrayed through actors and artifacts. Another strength of mine was the fact that my interview questions are worded and left open allowing me to get rich and detailed answers. For example I asked the question Explain how you view this establishment? What do you believe is its most useful aspect? My question was left open which allowed me to get a long and detailed answer from the student that I interviewed. She answered The most useful aspect of the Fretwell Caf is it location. It is in a good place because it is accessible between classes. I dont have to walk all the way to the student union if I need something to eat or drink. A weakness that I noticed about assignment one has to do with the location of my observation. While Fretwell is a busy location, the events are very repetitive. Just about everyone uses the Caf for the same thing and there is not a wide array of different activities going on. Without a lot going on, discourse communities are limited. The comments that I received during the workshop were positive and negative. Each of the comments I found useful when it came to revising my paper. The good comments provided an example for me to base the rest of my paper off, and the negative comments showed me what needed to be fixed. The negative comments also gave me an example of what not to do grammatically. The comments both negative and positive helped me improve the overall flow of my paper and to better clear up ideas and or sentences that would require background knowledge to understand. Some of the comments included: The word who should be placed in sentence. When I personally read this sentence it sounded fine, but once it was brought to my attention by a group member it suddenly was not clear what I was trying to say. Another very useful comment was Reword so that people know they are the only couple in the caf. Combine the two sentences to make it flow better. A sentence in my paper originally stated that there was a couple in the caf, but it did not mention that they were the only couple in the caf, which was the entire point of the sentence. My group members gave me great feedback that helped me improve the quality of my paper. I would like you to pay particular attention to the details that I have in my observations. I have gotten great feedback on my observations but I would like to see if you have any further recommendations that would otherwise improve them even more.