THE HISTORY OF THE ADVENTURES OF JOSEPH ANDREWS AND OF HIS FRIEND MR.

ABRAHAM ADAMS
Written in Imitation of the Manner of er!ante"# A$thor of Don Quixote %& Henr& Fie'(in)
PREFA E. As it is possible the mere English Reader may have a different Idea of Romance with the Author of these little Volumes; and may consequently expect a ind of Entertainment! not to be found! nor which was even intended! in the following "ages; it may not be improper to premise a few #ords concerning this ind of #riting! which I do not remember to have seen hitherto attempted in our $anguage. %he Epic as well as the &rama is divided into %ragedy and 'omedy. (omer! who was the )ather of this *pecies of "oetry! gave us a "attern of both these! tho+ that of the latter ind is entirely lost; which Aristotle tells us! bore the same relation to 'omedy which his Iliad bears to %ragedy. And perhaps! that we have no more Instances of it among the #riters of Antiquity! is owing to the $oss of this great "attern! which! had it survived! would have found its Imitators equally with the other "oems of this great ,riginal. And farther! as this "oetry may be %ragic or 'omic! I will not scruple to say it may be li ewise either in Verse or "rose- for tho+ it wants one particular! which the 'ritic enumerates in the constituent "arts of an Epic "oem! namely .etre; yet! when any ind of #riting contains all its other "arts! such as )able! Action! 'haracters! *entiments! and &iction! and is deficient in .etre only; it seems! I thin ! reasonable to refer it to the Epic; at least! as no 'ritic hath thought proper to range it under any other (ead! nor to assign it a particular /ame to itself. %hus the %elemachus of the Arch01ishop of 'ambray appears to me of the Epic 2ind! as well as the ,dyssey of (omer; indeed! it is much fairer and more reasonable to give it a /ame common with that *pecies from which it differs only in a single Instance! than to confound it with those which it resembles in no other. *uch are those voluminous #or s commonly called Romances! namely! 'lelia! 'leopatra! Astr3a! 'assandra! the 4rand 'yrus! and innumerable others which contain! as I apprehend! very little Instruction or Entertainment. /ow a comic Romance is a comic Epic0"oem in "rose; differing from 'omedy! as the serious Epic from %ragedy- its Action being more extended and comprehensive; containing a much larger 'ircle of Incidents! and introducing a greater Variety of 'haracters. It differs from the serious Romance in its )able and Action! in this; that as in the one these are grave and solemn! so in the other they are light and ridiculous- it differs in its 'haracters! by introducing "ersons of inferiour Ran ! and consequently of inferiour .anners! whereas the grave Romance! sets the highest before us; lastly in its *entiments and &iction; by preserving the $udicrous instead of the *ublime. In the &iction I thin ! 1urlesque itself may be sometimes admitted; of which many Instances will occur in this #or ! as in the &escriptions of the 1attles! and some other "laces! not necessary to be pointed out to the 'lassical Reader; for whose Entertainment those "arodies or 1urlesque Imitations are chiefly calculated. 1ut tho+ we have sometimes admitted this in our &iction! we have carefully excluded it from our *entiments and 'haracters- for there it is never properly introduced! unless in #ritings of the 1urlesque ind! which this is not intended to be. Indeed! no two *pecies of #riting can differ more widely than the 'omic and the 1urlesque- for as the latter is ever the Exhibition of what is monstrous and unnatural! and where our &elight! if we examine it! arises from the surpri5ing Absurdity! as in appropriating the .anners of the highest to the lowest! or 6 converso; so in the former! we should ever confine ourselves strictly to /ature from the 7ust Imitation of which! will flow all the "leasure we can this way convey to a sensible Reader. And perhaps! there is one Reason! why a 'omic #riter should of all others be the least excused for deviating from /ature! since it may not be always so easy for a serious "oet to meet with the 4reat and the Admirable; but $ife every where furnishes an accurate ,bserver with the Ridiculous.

I have hinted this little! concerning 1urlesque; because! I have often heard that /ame given to "erformances! which have been truly of the 'omic ind! from the Author+s having sometimes admitted it in his &iction only; which as it is the &ress of "oetry! doth li e the &ress of .en establish 'haracters! 8the one of the whole "oem! and the other of the whole .an!9 in vulgar ,pinion! beyond any of their greater Excellencies1ut surely! a certain &rollery in *tyle! where the 'haracters and *entiments are perfectly natural! no more constitutes the 1urlesque! than an empty "omp and &ignity of #ords! where every thing else is mean and low! can entitle any "erformance to the Appellation of the true *ublime. And I apprehend! my $ord *haftesbury+s ,pinion of mere 1urlesque agrees with mine! when he asserts! :%here is no such %hing to be found in the #ritings of the Antients.: 1ut perhaps! I have less Abhorrence than he professes for it- and that not because I have had some little *uccess on the *tage this way; but rather! as it contributes more to exquisite .irth and $aughter than any other; and these are probably more wholesome "hysic for the .ind! and conduce better to purge away *pleen! .elancholy and ill Affections! than is generally imagined. /ay! I will appeal to common ,bservation! whether the same 'ompanies are not found more full of 4ood0(umour and 1enevolence! after they have been sweeten+d for two or three (ours with Entertainments of this ind! than when soured by a %ragedy or a grave $ecture. 1ut to illustrate all this by another *cience! in which! perhaps! we shall see the &istinction more clearly and plainly- $et us examine the #or s of a 'omic (istory "ainter! with those "erformances which the Italians call 'aricatura; where we shall find the true Excellence of the former! to consist in the exactest 'opy of /ature; insomuch! that a 7udicious Eye instantly re7ects any thing outr;; any $iberty which the "ainter hath ta en with the )eatures of that Alma .ater. <#hereas in the 'aricatura we allow all $icence. Its Aim is to exhibit .onsters! not .en; and all &istortions and Exaggerations whatever are within its proper "rovince. /ow what 'aricatura is in "ainting! 1urlesque is in #riting; and in the same manner the 'omic #riter and "ainter correlate to each other. And here I shall observe! that as in the former! the "ainter seems to have the Advantage; so it is in the latter infinitely on the side of the #riter- for the .onstrous is much easier to paint than describe! and the ridiculous to describe than paint. And tho+ perhaps this latter *pecies doth not in either *cience so strongly affect and agitate the .uscles as the other; yet it will be owned! I believe! that a more rational and useful "leasure arises to us from it. (e who should call the Ingenious (ogarth a 1urlesque "ainter! would! in my ,pinion! do him very little (onour- for sure it is much easier! much less the *ub7ect of Admiration! to paint a .an with a /ose! or any other )eature of a preposterous *i5e! or to expose him in some absurd or monstrous Attitude! than to express the Affections of .en on 'anvas. It hath been thought a vast 'ommendation of a "ainter! to say his )igures seem to breathe; but surely! it is a much greater and nobler Applause! that they appear to thin . 1ut to return<%he Ridiculous only! as I have before said! falls within my "rovince in the present #or . < /or will some Explanation of this #ord be thought impertinent by the Reader! if he considers how wonderfully it hath been mista en! even by #riters who have profess+d it- for to what but such a .ista e! can we attribute the many Attempts to ridicule the blac est Villanies; and what is yet worse! the most dreadful 'alamities= #hat could exceed the Absurdity of an Author! who should write the 'omedy of /ero! with the merry Incident of ripping up his .other+s 1elly; or what would give a greater *hoc to (umanity! than an Attempt to expose the .iseries of "overty and &istress to Ridicule= And yet! the Reader will not want much $earning to suggest such Instances to himself. 1esides! it may seem remar able! that Aristotle! who is so fond and free of &efinitions! hath not thought proper to define the Ridiculous. Indeed! where he tells us it is proper to 'omedy! he hath remar ed that Villany is not its ,b7ect- but he hath not! as I remember! positively asserted what is. /or doth the Abb; 1ellegarde! who hath writ a %reatise on this *ub7ect! tho+ he shews us many *pecies of it! once trace it to its )ountain. %he only *ource of the true Ridiculous 8as it appears to me9 is Affectation. 1ut tho+ it arises from one *pring only! when we consider the infinite *treams into which this one branches! we shall presently cease to admire at the copious )ield it affords to an ,bserver. /ow Affectation proceeds from one of these two 'auses! Vanity! or (ypocrisy- for as Vanity puts us on affecting false 'haracters! in order to purchase Applause; so (ypocrisy sets us on an Endeavour to avoid 'ensure by concealing our Vices under an Appearance of their opposite Virtues. And tho+ these two 'auses are often confounded! 8for they require some &ifficulty in

distinguishing;9 yet! as they proceed from very different .otives! so they are as clearly distinct in their ,perations- for indeed! the Affectation which arises from Vanity is nearer to %ruth than the other; as it hath not that violent Repugnancy of /ature to struggle with! which that of the (ypocrite hath. It may be li ewise noted! that Affectation doth not imply an absolute /egation of those >ualities which are affected- and therefore! tho+! when it proceeds from (ypocrisy! it be nearly allied to &eceit; yet when it comes from Vanity only! it parta es of the /ature of ,stentation- for instance! the Affectation of $iberality in a vain .an! differs visibly from the same Affectation in the Avaricious; for tho+ the vain .an is not what he would appear! or hath not the Virtue he affects! to the degree he would be thought to have it; yet it sits less au wardly on him than on the avaricious .an! who is the very Reverse of what he would seem to be. )rom the &iscovery of this Affectation arises the Ridiculous< which always stri es the Reader with *urpri5e and "leasure; and that in a higher and stronger &egree when the Affectation arises from (ypocrisy! than when from Vanity- for to discover any one to be the exact Reverse of what he affects! is more surpri5ing! and consequently more ridiculous! than to find him a little deficient in the >uality he desires the Reputation of. I might observe that our 1en ?ohnson! who of all .en understood the Ridiculous the best! hath chiefly used the hypocritical Affectation. /ow from Affectation only! the .isfortunes and 'alamities of $ife! or the Imperfections of /ature! may become the ,b7ects of Ridicule. *urely he hath a very ill0framed .ind! who can loo on @gliness! Infirmity! or "overty! as ridiculous in themselves- nor do I believe any .an living who meets a dirty )ellow riding through the *treets in a 'art! is struc with an Idea of the Ridiculous from it; but if he should see the same )igure descend from his 'oach and *ix! or bolt from his 'hair with his (at under his Arm! he would then begin to laugh! and with 7ustice. In the same manner! were we to enter a poor (ouse! and behold a wretched )amily shivering with 'old and languishing with (unger! it would not incline us to $aughter! 8at least we must have very diabolical /atures! if it would-9 but should we discover there a 4rate! instead of 'oals! adorned with )lowers! empty "late or 'hina &ishes on the *ide0board! or any other Affectation of Riches and )inery either on their "ersons or in their )urniture; we might then indeed be excused! for ridiculing so fantastical an Appearance. .uch less are natural Imperfections the ,b7ects of &erision- but when @gliness aims at the Applause of 1eauty! or $ameness endeavours to display Agility; it is then that these unfortunate 'ircumstances! which at first moved our 'ompassion! tend only to raise our .irth. %he "oet carries this very far; /one are for being what they are in )ault! 1ut for not being what they would be thought. #here if the .etre would suffer the #ord Ridiculous to close the first $ine! the %hought would be rather more proper. 4reat Vices are the proper ,b7ects of our &etestation! smaller )aults of our "ity- but Affectation appears to me the only true *ource of the Ridiculous. 1ut perhaps it may be ob7ected to me! that I have against my own Rules introduced Vices! and of a very blac 2ind into this #or . %o which I shall answer- )irst! that it is very difficult to pursue a *eries of human Actions and eep clear from them. *econdly! %hat the Vices to be found here! are rather the accidental 'onsequences of some human )railty! or )oible! than 'auses habitually existing in the .ind. %hirdly! %hat they are never set forth as the ,b7ects of Ridicule but &etestation. )ourthly! %hat they are never the principal )igure at that %ime on the *cene; and lastly! they never produce the intended Evil. (aving thus distinguished ?oseph Andrews from the "roductions of Romance #riters on the one hand! and 1urlesque #riters on the other! and given some few very short (ints 8for I intended no more9 of this *pecies of writing! which I have affirmed to be hitherto unattempted in our $anguage; I shall leave to my good natur+d Reader to apply my "iece to my ,bservations! and will detain him no longer than with a #ord concerning the 'haracters in this #or . And here I solemnly protest! I have no Intention to vilify or asperse any one- for tho+ every thing is copied from the 1oo of /ature! and scarce a 'haracter or Action produced which I have not ta en from my own ,bservations and Experience! yet I have used the utmost 'are to obscure the "ersons by such different 'ircumstances! &egrees! and 'olours! that it will be impossible to guess at them with any degree of

'ertainty; and if it ever happens otherwise! it is only where the )ailure characteri5ed is so minute! that it is a )oible only which the "arty himself may laugh at as well as any other. As to the 'haracter of Adams! as it is the most glaring in the whole! so I conceive it is not to be found in any 1oo now extant. It is designed a 'haracter of perfect *implicity; and as the 4oodness of his (eart will recommend him to the 4ood0natur+d; so I hope it will excuse me to the 4entlemen of his 'loth; for whom! while they are worthy of their sacred ,rder! no .an can possibly have a greater Respect. %hey will therefore excuse me! notwithstanding the low Adventures in which he is engaged! that I have made him a 'lergyman; since no other ,ffice could have given him so many ,pportunities of displaying his worthy Inclinations. BOO* I. '(A". I. Of writing Lives in general, and particularly of Pamela; with a Word by the bye of Colley Cibber and others. It is a trite but true ,bservation! that Examples wor more forcibly on the .ind than "recepts- And if this be 7ust in what is odious and blameable! it is more strongly so in what is amiable and praise0worthy. (ere Emulation most effectually operates upon us! and inspires our Imitation in an irresistible manner. A good .an therefore is a standing $esson to all his Acquaintance! and of far greater use in that narrow 'ircle than a good 1oo . 1ut as it often happens that the best .en are but little nown! and consequently cannot extend the @sefulness of their Examples a great way; the #riter may be called in aid to spread their (istory farther! to present the amiable "ictures to those who have not the (appiness of nowing the ,riginals; and by communicating such valuable "atterns to the #orld! may perhaps do a more extensive *ervice to .an ind than the "erson whose $ife originally afforded the "attern. In this $ight I have always regarded those 1iographers who have recorded the Actions of great and worthy "ersons of both *exes. /ot to mention those antient #riters which of late days are little read being written in obsolete! and! as they are generally thought! unintelligible $anguages; such as Plutarch, epos, and others which I heard of in my Aouth! our own $anguage affords many of excellent @se and Instruction! finely calculated to sow the *eeds of Virtue in Aouth! and very easy to be comprehended by "ersons of moderate 'apacity. *uch are the (istory of !ohn the 4reat! who! by his brave and heroic Actions against .en of large and athletic 1odies! obtained the glorious Appellation of the 4iant0 iller; that of an Earl of Warwic", whose 'hristian /ame was #uy; the $ives of Argalus and Parthenia, and above all! the (istory of those seven worthy "ersonages! the 'hampions of 'hristendom. In all these! &elight is mixed with Instruction! and the Reader is almost as much improved as entertained. 1ut I pass by these and many others! to mention two 1oo s lately published! which represent an admirable "attern of the amiable in either *ex. %he former of these which deals in .ale0Virtue! was written by the great "erson himself! who lived the $ife he hath recorded! and is by many thought to have lived such a $ife only in order to write it. %he other is communicated to us by an (istorian who borrows his $ights! as the common .ethod is! from authentic "apers and Records. %he Reader! I believe! already con7ectures! I mean! the $ives of .r. Colley Cibber, and of .rs. Pamela Andrews. (ow artfully doth the former! by insinuating that he escaped being promoted to the highest *tations in 'hurch and *tate! teach us a 'ontempt of worldly 4randeurB how strongly doth he inculcate an absolute *ubmission to our *uperiorsB $astly! how completely doth he arm us against so uneasy! so wretched a "assion as the )ear of *hame; how clearly doth he expose the Emptiness and Vanity of that )antom! ReputationB #hat the )emale Readers are taught by the .emoirs of .rs. Andrews, is so well set forth in the excellent Essays or $etters prefixed to the second and subsequent Editions of that #or ! that it would be here a needless Repetition. %he authentic (istory with which I now present the public! is an Instance of the great 4ood that 1oo is li ely to do! and of the "revalence of Example which I have 7ust observed- since it will appear that it was by eeping the excellent "attern of his *ister+s Virtues before his Eyes! that .r. !oseph Andrews was chiefly enabled to preserve his "urity in the midst of such great %emptations; I shall only add! that this 'haracter of .ale0'hastity! tho+ doubtless as desirable! as becoming in one "art of the human

*pecies! as in the other! is almost the only Virtue which the great Apologist hath not given himself for the sa e of giving the Example to his Readers. '(A". II. Of $r. !oseph Andrews his %irth, Parentage, &ducation, and great &ndowments, with a Word or two concerning Ancestors. .r. !oseph Andrews, the (ero of our ensuing (istory! was esteemed to be the only *on of 4affar and 4ammer Andrews, and 1rother to the illustrious Pamela, whose Virtue is at present so famous. As to his Ancestors! we have searched with great &iligence! but little *uccess- being unable to trace them farther than his 4reat 4randfather! who! as an elderly "erson in the "arish remembers to have heard his )ather say! was an excellent 'udgel0player. #hether he had any Ancestors before this! we must leave to the ,pinion of our curious Reader! finding nothing of sufficient 'ertainty to relie on. (owever! we cannot omit inserting an Epitaph which an ingenious )riend of ours hath communicated. 'tay (raveller, for underneath this Pew Lies fast asleep that merry $an Andrew; When the last )ay*s great 'un shall gild the '"ies, (hen he shall from his (omb get up and rise. %e merry while thou can*st+ for surely thou 'hall shortly be as sad as he is now. %he #ords are almost out of the *tone with Antiquity. 1ut it is needless to observe! that Andrew here is writ without an s, and is besides a 'hristian /ame. .y )riend moreover con7ectures this to have been the )ounder of that *ect of laughing "hilosophers! since called $erry Andrews. %o wave therefore a 'ircumstance! which! tho+ mentioned in conformity to the exact Rules of 1iography! is not greatly material; I proceed to things of more consequence. Indeed it is sufficiently certain! that he had as many Ancestors! as the best .an living; and perhaps! if we loo five or six hundred Aears bac wards! might be related to some "ersons of very great )igure at present! whose Ancestors within half the last 'entury are buried in as great ,bscurity. 1ut suppose for Argument+s sa e we should admit that he had no Ancestors at all! but had sprung up! according to the modern "hrase! out of a &unghill! as the Athenians pretended they themselves did from the Earth! would not this Auto"opros have been 7ustly entitled to all the "raise arising from his own Virtues= #ould it not be hard! that a .an who hath no Ancestors should therefore be render+d incapable of acquiring (onour! when we see so many who have no Virtues! en7oying the (onour of their )orefathers= At ten Aears old 8by which %ime his Education was advanced to #riting and Reading9 he was bound an Apprentice! according to the *tatute! to *ir (homas %ooby, an @ncle of .r. %ooby*s by the )ather+s side. *ir (homas having then an Estate in his own hands! the young Andrews was at first employed in what in the 'ountry they call "eeping %irds. (is ,ffice was to perform the "art the Antients assigned to the 4od Priapus, which &eity the .oderns call by the /ame of !ac",o*,Lent- but his Voice being so extremely musical! that it rather allured the 1irds than terrified them! he was soon transplanted from the )ields into the &og0 ennel! where he was placed under the (untsman! and made what *portsmen term a Whipper,in. )or this "lace li ewise the *weetness of his Voice disqualified him- the &ogs preferring the .elody of his chiding to all the alluring /otes of the (untsman! who soon became so incensed at it! that he desired *ir (homas to provide otherwise for him; and constantly laid every )ault the &ogs were at! to the Account of the poor 1oy! who was now transplanted to the *table. (ere he soon gave "roofs of *trength and Agility! beyond his Aears! and constantly rode the most spirited and vicious (orses to water with an Intrepidity which surpri5ed every one. #hile he was in this *tation! he rode several Races for *ir (homas, and this with such Expertness and *uccess! that the neighbouring 4entlemen frequently solicited the 2night! to permit little !oey 8for so he was called9 to ride their .atches. %he best 4amesters! before they laid their .oney! always enquired which (orse little !oey was to ride! and the 1etts were rather proportioned by the Rider than by the (orse himself; especially after he had scornfully refused a considerable 1ribe to play booty on such an ,ccasion. %his extremely raised his 'haracter! and so pleased the $ady %ooby, that she desired to have him 8being now seventeen Aears of Age9 for her own )oot0boy.

?oey was now preferred from the *table to attend on his $ady; to go on her Errands! stand behind her 'hair! wait at her %ea0table! and carry her "rayer01oo to 'hurch; at which "lace! his Voice gave him an ,pportunity of distinguishing himself by singing "salms- he behaved li ewise in every other respect so well a divine *ervice! that it recommended him to the /otice of .r. Abraham Adams the 'urate; who too an ,pportunity one &ay! as he was drin ing a 'up of Ale in *ir (homas*s 2itchin! to as the young .an several >uestions concerning Religion; with his Answers to which he was wonderfully pleased. '(A". III. Of $r. Abraham Adams the Curate, $rs. 'lipslop the Chambermaid, and others. .r. Abraham Adams was an excellent *cholar. (e was a perfect .aster of the #ree" and Latin $anguages; to which he added a great *hare of 2nowledge in the ,riental %ongues! and could read and translate -rench, .talian and 'panish. (e had applied many Aears to the most severe *tudy! and had treasured up a )und of $earning rarely to be met with in a @niversity. (e was besides a .an of good *ense! good "arts! and good /ature; but was at the same time as entirely ignorant of the #ays of this #orld! as an Infant 7ust entered into it could possibly be. As he had never any Intention to deceive! so he never suspected such a &esign in others. (e was generous! friendly and brave to an Excess; but *implicity was his 'haracteristic- he did! no more than .r. Colley Cibber, apprehend any such "assions as .alice and Envy to exist in .an ind! which was indeed less remar able in a 'ountry "arson than in a 4entleman who hath past his $ife behind the *cenes! a "lace which hath been seldom thought the *chool of Innocence; and where a very little ,bservation would have convinced the great Apologist! that those "assions have a real Existence in the human .ind. (is Virtue and his other >ualifications! as they rendered him equal to his ,ffice! so they made him an agreeable and valuable 'ompanion! and had so much endeared and well recommended him to a 1ishop! that at the Age of )ifty! he was provided with a handsome Income of twenty0three "ounds a Aear; which however! he could not ma e any great )igure with- because he lived in a dear 'ountry! and was a little incumbered with a #ife and six 'hildren. It was this 4entleman! who! having! as I have said! observed the singular &evotion of young Andrews, had found means to question him! concerning several "articulars; as how many 1oo s there were in the /ew %estament= which were they= how many 'hapters they contained= and such li e; to all which .r. Adams said! he answer+d much better than *ir (homas, or two other neighbouring ?ustices of the "eace could probably have done. .r. Adams was wonderfully sollicitous to now at what %ime! and by what ,pportunity the Aouth became acquainted with these .atters- who told him! that he had very early learnt to read and write by the 4oodness of his )ather! who! though he had not Interest enough to get him into a 'harity *chool! because a 'ousin of his )ather+s $andlord did not vote on the right side for a 'hurch0warden in a 1orough %own! yet had been himself at the Expence of *ixpence a #ee for his $earning. %hat he had ever since he was in *ir (homas*s )amily! employed all his (ours of $eisure in reading good 1oo s; that he had read the 1ible! the #hole &uty of .an! and (homas / 0empis ; and that as often as he could! without being perceived! he had studied a great good 1oo which lay open in the (all #indow! where he had read! as how the )evil carried away half a Church in 'ermon,time, without hurting one of the Congregation ; and as how a -ield of Corn ran away down a 1ill with all the (rees upon it, and covered another $an*s $eadow . %his sufficiently assured .r. Adams, that the good 1oo meant could be no other than %a"er*s 'hronicle. %he 'urate! surpri5ed to find such Instances of Industry and Application in a young .an! who had never met with the least Encouragement! as ed him! if he did not extremely regret the want of a liberal Education! and the not having been born of "arents! who might have indulged his %alents and &esire of 2nowledge= %o which he answered! :(e hoped he had profited somewhat better from the 1oo s he had read! than to lament his 'ondition in this #orld. %hat for his part! he was perfectly content with the *tate to which he was called! that he should endeavour to improve his %alent! which was all required of him! but not repine at his own $ot! nor envy those of his 1etters.: :#ell said! my $ad! reply+d the 'urate! and I wish some who have read many more 1oo s! had profited so much by them.:

Adams had no nearer Access to *ir (homas, or my $ady! than by the waiting 4entlewoman- )or *ir (homas was too apt to estimate .en merely by their &ress! or )ortune; and my $ady was a #oman of 4aiety! who had been bless+d with a %own0Education! and never spo e of any of her 'ountry /eighbours! by any other Appellation than that of %rutes. %hey both regarded the 'urate as a ind of &omestic only belonging to the "arson of the "arish! who was at this time at variance with the 2night on *uits! which he then had for %ithes with seven %enants of his .anor! in order to set aside a .odus! by which the "arson proposed an Advantage of several *hillings per annum, and by these *uits had greatly impoverished himself! and utterly undone the poor %enants. .rs. 'lipslop the #aiting04entlewoman! being herself the &aughter of a 'urate! preserved some Respect for Adams; she professed great Regard for his $earning! and would frequently dispute with him on "oints of %heology; but always insisted on a &eference to be paid to her @nderstanding! as she had been frequently at London, and new more of the #orld than a 'ountry "arson could pretend to. *he had in these &isputes a particular Advantage over Adams- for she was a mighty Affecter of hard #ords! which she used in such a manner! that the "arson! who durst not offend her! by calling her #ords in question! was frequently at some loss to guess her meaning! and would have been much less pu55led by an Arabian .anuscript. %o her therefore! Adams mentioned the 'ase of young Andrews, and desired her to recommend him to her $ady as a Aouth very susceptible of $earning! and one! whose Instruction in Latin he would himself underta e; by which means he might be qualified for a higher *tation than that of a )ootman- and added! she new it was in his .aster+s power easily to provide for him in a better manner. (e therefore desired! that the 1oy might be left behind under his 'are. :$a .r. Adams, said .rs. 'lipslop, do you thin my $ady will suffer any Preambles about such a .atter= *he he is going to London very concisely, and I am confidous would not leave !oey behind her on any account; for he is one of the genteelest young )ellows you may see in a *ummer+s &ay! and I am confidous she would as soon thin of parting with a "air of her 4rey0.ares- for she values herself as much on one as the other.: Adams would have interrupted! but she proceeded- :And why is Latin more necessitous for a )ootman than a 4entleman= It is very proper that you 'largymen must learn it! because you can+t preach without it- but I have heard 4entlemen say in London, that it is fit for no body else. I am confidous my $ady would be angry with me for mentioning it! and I shall draw myself into no such )elemy.: At which words her $ady+s 1ell rung! and .r. Adams was forced to retire; nor could he gain a second ,pportunity with her before their London ?ourney! which happened a few &ays afterwards. (owever! Andrews behaved very than fully and gratefully to him for his intended 2indness! which he told him he never would forget! and at the same time received from the good .an many Admonitions concerning the Regulation of his future 'onduct! and his "erseverance in Innocence and Industry. '(A". IV. What happened after their !ourney to London. /o sooner was young Andrews arrived at London, than he began to scrape an Acquaintance with his party0 colour+d 1rethren! who endeavour+d to ma e him despise his former 'ourse of $ife. (is (air was cut after the newest )ashion! and became his chief 'are. (e went abroad with it all the .orning in "apers! and drest it out in the Afternoon; they could not however teach him to game! swear! drin ! nor any other genteel Vice the %own abounded with. (e applied most of his leisure (ours to .usic! in which he greatly improved himself! and became so perfect a 'onnoisseur in that Art! that he led the ,pinion of all the other )ootmen at an ,pera! and they never condemned or applauded a single *ong contrary to his Approbation or &isli e. (e was a little too forward in Riots at the "lay0(ouses and Assemblies; and when he attended his $ady at 'hurch 8which was but seldom9 he behaved with less seeming &evotion than formerly- however! if he was outwardly a pretty )ellow! his .orals remained entirely uncorrupted! tho+ he was at the same time smarter and genteeler! than any of the 1eaus in %own! either in or out of $ivery. (is $ady! who had often said of him that !oey was the handsomest and genteelest )ootman in the 2ingdom! but that it was pity he wanted *pirit! began now to find that )ault no longer; on the contrary! she was

frequently heard to cry out! Aye, there is some Life in this -ellow . *he plainly saw the Effects which %own0 Air hath on the soberest 'onstitutions. *he would now wal out with him into 1yde,Par" in a .orning! and when tired! which happened almost every .inute! would lean on his Arm! and converse with him in great )amiliarity. #henever she stept out of her 'oach she would ta e him by the (and! and sometimes! for fear of stumbling! press it very hard; she admitted him to deliver .essages at her 1ed0side in a .orning! leered at him at %able! and indulged him in all those innocent )reedoms which #omen of )igure may permit without the least sully of their Virtue. 1ut tho+ their Virtue remains unsullied! yet now and then some small Arrows will glance at the *hadow of it! their Reputation; and so it fell out to $ady %ooby, who happened to be wal ing Arm in Arm with !oey one .orning in 1yde,Par", when $ady (ittle and $ady (attle came accidentally by in their 'oach. %less me, says $ady (ittle, can . believe my, &yes= .s that Lady, 1ooby= 'urely, says (attle. %ut what ma"es you surpri2ed3 Why is not that her -ootman, reply+d (ittle= At which (attle laughed and cryed! An old %usiness, . assure you, is it possible you should not have heard it = (he whole (own hath "nown it this half 4ear. %he 'onsequence of this Interview was a #hisper through a hundred Visits! which were separately performed by the two $adies the same Afternoon! and might have had a mischievous Effect! had it not been stopt by two fresh Reputations which were published the &ay afterwards! and engrossed the whole %al of the %own. 1ut whatever ,pinion or *uspicion the scandalous Inclination of &efamers might entertain of $ady %ooby*s innocent )reedoms! it is certain they made no Impression on young Andrews, who never offered to encroach beyond the $iberties which his $ady allowed him. A 1ehaviour which she imputed to the violent Respect he preserved for her! and which served only to heighten a something she began to conceive! and which the next 'hapter will open a little farther. '(A". V. (he )eath of 'ir (homas %ooby, with the affectionate and mournful %ehaviour of his Widow, and the great Purity of !oseph Andrews. At this %ime! an Accident happened which put a stop to these agreeable #al s! which probably would have soon puffed up the 'hee s of )ame! and caused her to blow her bra5en %rumpet through the %own! and this was no other than the &eath of *ir (homas %ooby, who departing this $ife! left his disconsolate $ady confined to her (ouse as closely as if she herself had been attac ed by some violent &isease. &uring the first six &ays the poor $ady admitted none but .rs. 'lipslop and three )emale )riends who made a "arty at 'ards- but on the seventh she ordered !oey, whom for a good Reason we shall hereafter call ?oseph! to bring up her %ea0 ettle. %he $ady being in 1ed! called !oseph to her! bad him sit down! and having accidentally laid her hand on his! she as ed him! if he had never been in Love= !oseph answered! with some 'onfusion! :it was time enough for one so young as himself to thin on such things.: As young as you are! reply+d the $ady! I am convinced you are no *tranger to that "assion; :'ome !oey,: says she! :tell me truly! who is the happy 4irl whose Eyes have made a 'onquest of you=: !oseph returned! :that all #omen he had ever seen were equally indifferent to him.: :, then!: said the $ady! :you are a general $over. Indeed you handsome )ellows! li e handsome #omen! are very long and difficult in fixing- but yet you shall never persuade me that your (eart is so insusceptible of Affection; I rather impute what you say to your *ecrecy! a very commendable >uality! and what I I am far from being angry with you for. /othing can be more unworthy in a young .an than to betray any Intimacies with the $adies.: Ladies5 $adam, said !oseph, . am sure . never had the .mpudence to thin" of any that deserve that ame . :&on+t pretend to too much .odesty! said she! for that sometimes may be impertinent- but pray! answer me this >uestion! *uppose a $ady should happen to li e you! suppose she should prefer you to all your *ex! and admit you to the same )amiliarities as you might have hoped for! if you had been born her equal! are you certain that no Vanity could tempt you to discover her= Answer me honestly! !oseph, (ave you so much more *ense and so much more Virtue than you handsome young )ellows generally have! who ma e no scruple of sacrificing our dear Reputation to your "ride! without considering the great ,bligation we lay on you! by our 'ondescension and 'onfidence= 'an you eep a *ecret! my !oey.: .adam says he! :I hope your $adyship can+t tax me with ever betraying the *ecrets of the )amily! and I hope! if you was to turn me away! I might have that 'haracter of you.: :I don+t

intend to turn you away! !oey,: said she! and sighed! :I am afraid it is not in my power.: *he then raised herself a little in her 1ed! and discovered one of the whitest /ec s that ever was seen; at which !oseph blushed! $aB says she! in an affected *urpri5e! :what am I doing= I have trusted myself with a .an alone! na ed in 1ed; suppose you should have any wic ed Intentions upon my (onour! how should I defend myself=: !oseph protested that he never had the least evil &esign again her. :/o! says she! perhaps you may not call your &esigns wic ed! and perhaps they are not so.: <(e swore they were not. :Aou misunderstand me! says she! I mean if they were against my (onour! they may not be wic ed! but the #orld calls them so. 1ut then! say you! the #orld will never now any thing of the .atter! yet would not that be trusting to your *ecrecy= .ust not my Reputation be then in your power= #ould you not then be my .aster=: !oseph begged her $adyship to be comforted! for that he would never imagine the least wic ed thing against her! and that he had rather die a thousand &eaths than give her any reason to suspect him. :Aes! said she! I must have Reason to suspect you. Are you not a .an= and without Vanity I may pretend to some 'harms. 1ut perhaps you may fear I should prosecute you; indeed I hope you do! and yet (eaven nows I should never have the 'onfidence to appear before a 'ourt of ?ustice! and you now! !oey, I am of a forgiving %emper. %ell me !oey, don+t you thin I should forgive you=: :Indeed .adam! says !oseph, I will never do any thing to disoblige your $adyship.: :(ow! says she! do you thin it would not disoblige me then= &o you thin I would willingly suffer you=: :I don+t understand you! .adam!: says !oseph . :&on+t you! said she! then you are either a )ool or pretend to be so! I find I was mista en in you! so get you down *tairs! and never let me see your )ace again- your pretended Innocence cannot impose on me.: :.adam! said !oseph, I would not have your $adyship thin any Evil of me. I have always endeavoured to be a dutiful *ervant both to you and my .aster.: :, thou Villain! answered my $ady! #hy did+st thou mention the /ame of that dear .an! unless to torment me! to bring his precious .emory to my .ind! 8 and then she burst into a -it of (ears 9: :4et thee from my *ight! I shall never endure thee more.: At which #ords she turned away from him! and !oseph retreated from the Room in a most disconsolate 'ondition! and writ the $etter which the Reader will find in the next 'hapter. '(A". VI. 1ow !oseph Andrews writ a Letter to his 'ister Pamela. %o .rs. Pamela Andrews, living with *quire %ooby. :)ear 'ister, *ince I received your $etter of your good $ady+s &eath! we have had a .isfortune of the same ind in our )amily. .y worthy .aster! *ir (homas, died about four &ays ago! and what is worse! my poor $ady is certainly gone distracted. /one of the *ervants expected her to ta e it so to heart! because they quarrelled almost every day of their $ives- but no more of that! because you now! Pamela, I never loved to tell the *ecrets of my .aster+s )amily; but to be sure you must have nown they never loved one another! and I have heard her $adyship wish his (onour dead above a thousand times- but no body nows what it is to lose a )riend till they have lost him. :&on+t tell any body what I write! because I should not care to have )ol s say I discover what passes in our )amily- but if it had not been so great a $ady! I should have thought she had had a mind to me. &ear Pamela, don+t tell any body- but she ordered me to sit down by her 1ed0side! when she was in na ed 1ed; and she held my (and! and tal ed exactly as a $ady does to her *weetheart in a *tage0"lay! which I have seen in Covent,#arden, while she wanted him to be no better than he should be. :If .adam be mad! I shall not care for staying long in the )amily; so I heartily wish you could get me a "lace either at the *quire+s! or some other neighbouring 4entleman+s! unless it be true that you are going to be married to "arson Williams, as )ol s tal ! and then I should be very willing to be his 'ler - for which you now I am qualified! being able to read! and to set a "salm. :I fancy! I shall be discharged very soon; and the .oment I am! unless I hear from you! I shall return to my old .aster+s 'ountry *eat! if it be only to see "arson Adams, who is the best .an in the #orld. London is a bad "lace! and there is so little good )ellowship! that next0door /eighbours don+t now one another. "ray give my *ervice to all )riends that enquire for me; so I rest

4our Loving %rother, !oseph Andrews.6 As soon as !oseph had sealed and directed this $etter! he wal ed down *tairs! where he met .rs. 'lipslop, with whom we shall ta e this ,pportunity to bring the Reader a little better acquainted. *he was an antient .aiden 4entlewoman of about )orty0five Aears of Age! who having made a small *lip in her Aouth had continued a good .aid ever since. *he was not at this time remar ably handsome; being very short! and rather too corpulent in 1ody! and somewhat red! with the Addition of "imples in the )ace. (er /ose was li ewise rather too large! and her Eyes too little; nor did she resemble a 'ow so much in her 1reath! as in two brown 4lobes which she carried before her; one of her $egs was also a little shorter than the other! which occasioned her to limp as she wal ed. %his fair 'reature had long cast the Eyes of Affection on !oseph, in which she had not met with quite so good *uccess as she probably wished! tho+ besides the Allurements of her native 'harms! she had given him %ea! *weetmeats! #ine! and many other &elicacies! of which by eeping the 2eys! she had the absolute 'ommand. !oseph however! had not returned the least 4ratitude to all these )avours! not even so much as a 2iss; tho+ I would not insinuate she was so easily to be satisfied- for surely then he would have been highly blameable. %he truth is! she was arrived at an Age when she thought she might indulge herself in any $iberties with a .an! without the danger of bringing a third "erson into the #orld to betray them. *he imagined! that by so long a *elf0denial! she had not only made amends for the small *lip of her Aouth above hinted at- but had li ewise laid up a >uantity of .erit to excuse any future )ailings. In a word! she resolved to give a loose to her amorous Inclinations! and pay off the &ebt of "leasure which she found she owed herself! as fast as possible. #ith these 'harms of "erson; and in this &isposition of .ind! she encountered poor !oseph at the 1ottom of the *tairs! and as ed him if he would drin a 4lass of something good this .orning. !oseph, whose *pirits were not a little cast down! very readily and than fully accepted the ,ffer; and together they went into a 'loset! where having delivered him a full 4lass of Ratifia! Ratisia and desired him to sit down! .rs. 'lipslop thus began:*ure nothing can be a more simple Contract in a #oman! than to place her Affections on a 1oy. If I had ever thought it would have been my )ate! I should have wished to die a thousand &eaths rather than live to see that &ay. If we li e a .an! the lightest (int sophisticates. #hereas a 1oy proposes upon us to brea through all the 7egulations of .odesty! before we can ma e any Oppression upon him.: !oseph, who did not understand a #ord she said! answered! : yes $adam;<: :Aes .adamB: reply+d .rs. 'lipslop with some #armth! :&o you intend to result my "assion= Is it not enough! ungrateful as you are! to ma e no Return to all the )avours I have done you- but you must treat me with .roning= 1arbarous .onsterB how have I deserved that my "assion should be resulted and treated with .roning=: :.adam!: answered !oseph, :I don+t understand your hard #ords- but I am certain! you have no ,ccasion to call me ungrateful- for so far from intending you any #rong. I have always loved you as well as if you had been my own .other.: :(ow! *irrahB: says .rs. 'lipslop in a Rage- :Aour own .otherB &o you assinuate that I am old enough to be your .other= I don+t now what a *tripling may thin - but I believe a .an would refer me to any 4reen0*ic ness silly 4irl whatsomdever- but I ought to despise you rather than be angry with you! for referring the 'onversation of 4irls to that of a #oman of *ense.: :.adam!: says !oseph, :I am sure I have always valued the (onour you did me by your 'onversation; for I now you are a #oman of $earning.: :Aes but! !oseph,: said she a little softened by the 'ompliment to her $earning! :If you had a Value for me! you certainly would have found some .ethod of shewing it me; for I am convicted you must see the Value I have for you. Aes! !oseph, my Eyes whether I would or no! must have declared a "assion I cannot conquer. <,hB !osephB<: As when a hungry %ygress! who long had traversed the #oods in fruitless search! sees within the Reach of her 'laws a $amb! she prepares to leap on her "rey; or as a voracious "i e! of immense *i5e! surveys through the liquid Element a Roach or 4udgeon which cannot escape her ?aws! opens them wide to swallow the little )ish- so did .rs. 'lipslop prepare to lay her violent amorous (ands on the poor !oseph, when luc ily her .istress+s 1ell rung! and delivered the intended .artyr from her 'lutches. *he was obliged to brea off abruptly! and defer the Execution of her "urpose to some other %ime. #e shall therefore return to the $ady %ooby, and give our Reader some Account of her 1ehaviour! after she was left by !oseph in a %emper of .ind not greatly different from that of the inflamed 'lipslop.

'(A". VI. 'ayings of wise $en. A )ialogue between the Lady and her $aid, and a Panegyric or rather 'atire on the Passion of Love, in the sublime 'tyle. It is the ,bservation of some antient *age! whose /ame I have forgot! that "assions operate differently on the human .ind! as &iseases on the 1ody! in proportion to the *trength or #ea ness! *oundness or Rottenness of the one and the other. #e hope therefore! a 7udicious Reader will give himself some "ains to observe! what we have so greatly laboured to describe! the different ,perations of this "assion of $ove in the gentle and cultivated .ind of the $ady %ooby, from those which it effected in the less polished and coarser &isposition of .rs. 'lipslop. ,ne other "hilosopher! whose /ame also at present escapes my .emory! hath somewhere said! that Resolutions ta en in the Absence of the beloved ,b7ect are very apt to vanish in its "resence; on both which wise *ayings the following 'hapter may serve as a 'omment. /o sooner had !oseph left the Room in the .anner we have before related! than the $ady! enraged at her &isappointment! began to reflect with *everity on her 'onduct. (er $ove was now changed to &isdain! which "ride assisted to torment her. *he despised herself for the .eanness of her "assion! and !oseph for its ill *uccess. (owever! she had now got the better of it in her own ,pinion! and determined immediately to dismiss the ,b7ect. After much tossing and turning in her 1ed! and many *oliloquies! which! if we had no better .atter for our Reader! we would give him; she at last rung the 1ell as above0mentioned! and was presently attended by .rs. 'lipslop, who was not much better pleased with !oseph, than the $ady herself. *lipslop! said $ady %ooby, when did you see ?oseph= %he poor #oman was so surpri5ed at the unexpected *ound of his /ame! at so critical a time! that she had the greatest &ifficulty to conceal the 'onfusion she was under from her .istress! whom she answered nevertheless! with pretty good 'onfidence! though not entirely void of )ear of *uspicion! that she had not seen him that .orning. :I am afraid!: said $ady %ooby, :he is a wild young )ellow.: :%hat he is!: said 'lipslop, :and a wic ed one too. %o my nowledge he games! drin s! swears and fights eternally- besides he is horribly indicted to #enching.: :AyB: said the $adyB :I never heard that of him.: :, .adam!: answered the other! :he is so lewd a Rascal that if your $adyship eeps him much longer! you will not have one Virgin in your (ouse except myself. And yet I can+t conceive what the #enches see in him! so be so foolishly fond as they are; in my Eyes he is as ugly a *carecrow as I ever upheld.: :/ay!: said the $ady! the 1oy is well enough. <:$a .a+am!: cries 'lipslop, :I thin him the ragmaticallest )ellow in the )amily.: :*ure! 'lipslop, : says she! :you are mista en- but which of the #omen do you most suspect=: :.adam!: says 'lipslop, :there is %etty the 'hamber0.aid! I am almost convicted, is with 'hild by him.: :AyB: says the $ady! :then pray pay her her #ages instantly. I will eep no such *luts in my )amily. And as for !oseph, you may discard him too.: :#ould your $adyship have him paid off immediately=: cries 'lipslop, :for perhaps! when %etty is gone! he may mend; and really the 1oy is a good *ervant! and a strong healthy luscious 1oy enough.: :%his .orning!: answered the $ady with some Vehemence. :I wish .adam!: cries 'lipslop, :your $adyship would be so good as to try him a little longer.: :I will not have my 'ommands disputed!: said the $ady! :sure you are not fond of him yourself.: :I .adam=: cries 'lipslop, reddening! if not blushing! :I should be sorry to thin your $adyship had any reason to respect me of )ondness for a )ellow; and if it be your "leasure! I shall fulfill it with as much reluctance as possible.: :As little! I suppose you mean!: said the $ady; :and so about it instantly.: .rs. 'lipslop went out! and the $ady had scarce ta en two turns before she fell to noc ing and ringing with great Violence. 'lipslop, who did not travel post0haste! soon returned! and was countermanded as to !oseph, but ordered to send %etty about her 1usiness without delay. *he went out a second time with much greater alacrity than before; when the $ady began immediately to accuse herself of #ant of Resolution! and to apprehend the Return of her Affection with its pernicious 'onsequences- she therefore applied herself again to the 1ell! and resummoned .rs. 'lipslop into her "resence; who again returned! and was told by her .istress! that she had consider+d better of the .atter! and was absolutely resolved to turn away !oseph; which she ordered her to do immediately. 'lipslop, who new the Violence of her $ady+s %emper! and would not venture her "lace for any Adonis or 1ercules in the @niverse! left her a third time; which she had no sooner done! than the little

4od Cupid, fearing he had not yet done the $ady+s 1usiness! too a fresh Arrow with the sharpest "oint out of his >uiver! and shot it directly into her (eart- in other and plainer $anguage! the $ady+s "assion got the better of her Reason. *he called bac 'lipslop once more! and told her! she had resolved to see the 1oy! and examine him herself; therefore bid her send him up. %his wavering in her .istress+s %emper probably put something into the #aiting04entlewoman+s (ead! not necessary to mention to the sagacious Reader. $ady %ooby was going to call her bac again! but could not prevail with herself. %he next 'onsideration therefore was! how she should behave to !oseph when he came in. *he resolved to preserve all the &ignity of the #oman of )ashion to her *ervant! and to indulge herself in this last View of !oseph 8for that she was most certainly resolved it should be9 at his own Expence! by first insulting! and then discarding him. , $ove! what monstrous %ric s dost thou play with thy Votaries of both *exesB (ow dost thou deceive them! and ma e them deceive themselvesB %heir )ollies are thy &elight. %heir *ighs ma e thee laugh! and their "angs are thy .errimentB /ot the 4reat 7ich, who turns .en into .on eys! #heelbarrows! and whatever else best humours his )ancy! hath so strangely metamorphosed the human *hape; nor the 4reat Cibber, who confounds all /umber! 4ender! and brea s through every Rule of 4rammar at his #ill! hath so distorted the &nglish $anguage! as thou dost metamorphose and distort the human *enses. %hou puttest out our Eyes! stoppest up our Ears! and ta est away the power of our /ostrils; so that we can neither see the largest ,b7ect! hear the loudest /oise! nor smell the most poignant "erfume. Again! when thou pleasest! thou can+st ma e a .ole0hill appear as a .ountain; a !ew*s0(arp sound li e a %rumpet; and a &a5y smell li e a Violet. %hou can+st ma e 'owardice brave! Avarice generous! "ride humble! and 'ruelty tender0hearted. It short! thou turnest the (eart of .an inside0out! as a ?uggler doth a "etticoat! and bringest whatsoever pleaseth thee out from it. If there be any one who doubts all this! let him read the next 'hapter. '(A". VII. .n which, after some very fine Writing, the 1istory goes on, and relates the .nterview between the Lady and !oseph; where the latter hath set an &8ample, which we despair of seeing followed by his 'e8, in this vicious Age. /ow the Ra e 1esperus had called for his 1reeches! and having well rubbed his drowsy Eyes! prepared to dress himself for all /ight; by whose Example his 1rother Ra es on Earth li ewise leave those 1eds! in which they had slept away the &ay. /ow (hetis the good (ousewife began to put on the "ot in order to regale the good .an Phoebus, after his daily $abours were over. In vulgar $anguage! it was in the Evening when !oseph attended his $ady+s ,rders. 1ut as it becomes us to preserve the 'haracter of this $ady! who is the (eroine of our %ale; and as we have naturally a wonderful %enderness for that beautiful "art of the human *pecies! called the )air *ex; before we discover too much of her )railty to our Reader! it will be proper to give him a lively Idea of that vast %emptation! which overcame all the Efforts of a modest and virtuous .ind; and then we humbly hope his 4ood0nature will rather pity than condemn the Imperfection of human Virtue. /ay! the $adies themselves will! we hope! be induced! by considering the uncommon Variety of 'harms! which united in this young .an+s "erson! to bridle their rampant "assion for 'hastity! and be at least! as mild as their violent .odesty and Virtue will permit them! in censuring the 'onduct of a #oman! who! perhaps! was in her own &isposition as chaste as those pure and sanctified Virgins! who! after a $ife innocently spent in the 4aieties of the %own! begin about )ifty to attend twice per diem, at the polite 'hurches and 'hapels! to return %han s for the 4race which preserved them formerly amongst 1eaus from %emptations! perhaps less powerful than what now attac ed the $ady %ooby. .r. !oseph Andrews was now in the one and twentieth Aear of his Age. (e was of the highest &egree of middle *tature. (is $imbs were put together with great Elegance and no less *trength. (is $egs and %highs were formed in the exactest "roportion. (is *houlders were broad and brawny! but yet his Arms hung so easily! that he had all the *ymptoms of *trength without the least clumsiness. (is (air was of a nut0brown 'olour! and was displayed in wanton Ringlets down his 1ac . (is )orehead was high! his Eyes dar ! and as full of *weetness as of )ire. (is /ose a little inclined to the Roman. (is %eeth white and even. (is $ips full

red! and soft. (is 1eard was only rough on his 'hin and upper $ip; but his 'hee s! in which his 1lood glowed! were overspread with a thic &own. (is 'ountenance had a %enderness 7oined with a *ensibility inexpressible. Add to this the most perfect /eatness in his &ress! and an Air! which to those who have not seen many /oblemen! would give an Idea of /obility. *uch was the "erson who now appeared before the $ady. *he viewed him some time in *ilence! and twice or thrice before she spa e! changed her .ind as to the manner in which she should begin. At length! she said to him! :!oseph, I am sorry to hear such 'omplaints against you; I am told you behave so rudely to the .aids! that they cannot do their 1usiness in quiet; I mean those who are not wic ed enough to hear en to your *olicitations. As to others! they may not! perhaps call you rude- for there are wic ed *luts who ma e one ashamed of one+s own *ex; and are as ready to admit any nauseous )amiliarity as )ellows to offer it; nay! there are such in my )amily- but they shall not stay in it; that impudent %rollop! who is with 'hild by you! is discharged by this time.: As a "erson who is struc through the (eart with a %hunderbolt! loo s extremely surprised! nay! and perhaps! is so too. <%hus the poor !oseph received the false Accusation of his .istress; he blushed and loo ed confounded! which she misinterpreted to be *ymptoms of his 4uilt! and thus went on. :'ome hither! !oseph- another .istress might discard you for these ,ffences; 1ut I have a 'ompassion for your Aouth! if I could be certain you would be no more guilty. And consider! 'hild! 8laying her (and carelessly upon his9 you are a handsome young )ellow! and might do better; you might ma e your )ortune <.: :.adam!: said !oseph, :I do assure your $adyship! I don+t now whether any .aid in the (ouse is .an or #oman<:. :,h fieB !oseph,: answer+d the $ady! :don+t commit another 'rime in denying the %ruth. I could pardon the first; but I hate a $yar.: :.adam!: cries !oseph, :I hope your $adyship will not be offended at my asserting my Innocence- and by all that is *acred! I have never offered more than 2issing.: :2issingB: said the $ady! :do you call that no 'rime= 2issing! !oseph, is but a "rologue to a "lay. 'an I believe a young )ellow of your Age and 'omplexion will be content with 2issing= /o! !oseph, there is no #oman who grants that but will grant more! and I am deceived greatly in you! if you would not put her closely to it. #hat would you thin ! !oseph, if I admitted you to iss me=: !oseph reply+d! :(e would sooner die than have any such %hought.: :And yet! !oseph,: returned she! :$adies have admitted their )ootmen to such )amiliarities; and )ootmen! I confess to you! much less deserving them; )ellows without half your 'harms- for such might almost excuse the 'rime. %ell me! therefore! !oseph, if I should admit you to such )reedom! what would you thin of me=<tell me freely.: :.adam!: said !oseph, :I should thin your $adyship condescended a great deal below yourself.: :"ughB: said she! :that I am to answer to myself- but would not you insist on more= #ould you be contented with a 2iss= #ould not your Inclinations be all on fire rather by such a )avour=: :.adam!: said !oseph, :if they were! I hope I should be able to control them! without suffering them to get the better of my Virtue.: <Aou have heard! Reader! "oets tal of the 'tatue of 'urpri2e; you have heard li ewise! or else you have heard very little! how *urpri5e made one of the *ons of Cr9sus spea tho+ he was dumb. Aou have seen the )aces! in the Eighteen0penny 4allery! when through the %rap0&oor! to soft or no .usic ! .r. %ridgewater, .r. William $ills, or some other of ghostly Appearance! hath ascended with a )ace all pale with "owder! and a *hirt all bloody with Ribbons; but from none of these! nor from Phidias, or Pra8iteles, if they should return to $ife<no! not from the inimitable "encil of my )riend 1ogarth, could you receive such an Idea of *urpri5e! as would have entered in at your Eyes! had they beheld the $ady %ooby, when those last #ords issued out from the $ips of !oseph. <:Aour VirtueB 8said the $ady recovering after a *ilence of two .inutes9 I shall never survive it. Aour VirtueB Intolerable 'onfidenceB (ave you the Assurance to pretend! that when a $ady demeans herself to throw aside the Rules of &ecency! in order to honour you with the highest )avour in her "ower! your Virtue should resist her Inclination= %hat when she had conquer+d her own Virtue! she should find an ,bstruction in yours=: :.adam!: said !oseph :I can+t see why her having no Virtue should be a Reason against my having any. ,r why! because I am a .an! or because I am poor! my Virtue must be subservient to her "leasures.: :I am out of patience!: cries the $ady:&id ever .ortal hear of a .an+s VirtueB &id ever the greatest! or the gravest .en pretend to any of this 2indB #ill .agistrates who punish $ewdness! or "arsons! who preach against it! ma e any scruple of committing it= And can a 1oy! a *tripling! have the 'onfidence to tal of his Virtue=: :.adam!: says !oseph, :that 1oy is the 1rother of Pamela, and would be ashamed! that the 'hastity of his )amily! which is

preserved in her! should be stained in him. If there are such .en as your $adyship mentions! I am sorry for it! and I wish they had an ,pportunity of reading over those $etters! which my )ather hath sent me of my *ister Pamela*s, nor do I doubt but such an Example would amend them.: Aou impudent Villain! cries the $ady in a Rage! :&o you insult me with the )ollies of my Relation! who hath exposed himself all over the 'ountry upon your *ister+s account= a little Vixen! whom I have always wondered my late $ady !ohn %ooby ever ept in her (ouse. *irrahB get out of my sight! and prepare to set out this /ight! for I will order you your #ages immediately! and you shall be stripped and turned away.<: :.adam!: says !oseph, :I am sorry I have offended your $adyship! I am sure I never intended it.: :Aes! *irrah!: cries she! :you have had the Vanity to misconstrue the little innocent )reedom I too in order to try! whether what I had heard was true. ,+ my 'onscience! you have had the Assurance to imagine! I was fond of you myself.: !oseph was going to spea ! when she refused to hear him! and ordered him instantly to leave the Room. (e was no sooner gone! than she burst forth into the following Exclamation- :#hither doth this violent "assion hurry us= #hat .eannesses do we submit to from its Impulse= #isely we resist its first and least Approaches; for it is then only we can assure ourselves the Victory. /o #oman could ever safely say! so far only will . go. (ave I not exposed myself to the Refusal of my )ootman= I cannot bear the Reflection.: @pon which she applied herself to the 1ell! and rung it with infinite more Violence than was necessary; the faithful 'lipslop attending near at hand- %o say the truth! she had conceived a *uspicion at her last Interview with her .istress; and had waited ever since in the Antichamber! having carefully applied her Ears to the 2ey0(ole during the whole time! that the preceeding 'onversation passed between !oseph and the $ady. '(A". VIII. What passed between the Lady and $rs. 'lipslop, in which we prophesy there are some 'tro"es which every one will not truly comprehend at the first 7eading. :'lipslop,: said the $ady! :I find too much Reason to believe all thou hast told me of this wic ed !oseph; I have determined to part with him instantly; so go you to the *teward! and bid him pay him his #ages.: 'lipslop, who had preserved hitherto a &istance to her $ady! rather out of /ecessity than Inclination! and who thought the 2nowledge of this *ecret had thrown down all &istinction between them! answered her .istress very pertly! :*he wished she new her own .ind; and that she was certain she would call her bac again! before she was got half way down stairs.: %he $ady replied! :she had ta en a Resolution! and was resolved to eep it.: :I am sorry for it!: cries 'lipslop; :and if I had nown you would have punished the poor $ad so severely! you should never have heard a "article of the .atter. (ere+s a )uss indeed! about nothing.: :/othingB: returned my $ady; :&o you thin I will countenance $ewdness in my (ouse=: :If you will turn away every )ootman!: said 'lipslop, :that is a lover of the *port! you must soon open the 'oach0&oor yourself! or get a *ett of $ophrodites to wait upon you; and I am sure I hated the *ight of them even singing in an ,pera.: :&o as I bid you!: says my $ady! :and don+t shoc my Ears with with your beastly $anguage.: :.arry0come0up!: cries 'lipslop, :"eople+s Ears are sometimes the nicest "art about them.: %he $ady! who began to admire the new *tyle in which her #aiting04entlewoman delivered herself! and by the 'onclusion of her *peech! suspected somewhat of the %ruth! called her bac ! and desired to now what she meant by that extraordinary degree of )reedom which she thought proper to indulge to her %ongue. :)reedomB: says 'lipslop, :I don+t now what you call )reedom! .adam; *ervants have %ongues as well as their .istresses.: :Aes! and saucy ones too!: answered the $ady; :but I assure you I shall bear no such Impertinence.: :ImpertinenceB I don+t now that I am impertinent!: says 'lipslop. :Aes indeed you are!: cries my $ady; :and unless you mend your .anners! this (ouse is no "lace for you.: :.annersB: cries 'lipslop, :I never was thought to want .anners nor $odesty neither; and for "laces! there are more "laces than one; and I now what I now.: :#hat do you now! .istress!: answered the $ady= :I am not obliged to tell that to every body!: says 'lipslop, :any more than I am obliged to eep it a *ecret.: :I desire you would provide yourself!: answered the $ady. :#ith all my heart!: replied the #aiting04entlewoman; and so departed in a "assion! and slapped the &oor after her. %he $ady too plainly perceived that her #aiting04entlewoman new more than she would willingly have had her acquainted with; and this she imputed to !oseph*s having discovered to her what past at the first

Interview. %his therefore blew up her Rage against him! and confirmed her in a Resolution of parting with him. 1ut the dismissing .rs. 'lipslop was a "oint not so easily to be resolved upon- she had the utmost %enderness for her Reputation! as she new on that depended many of the most valuable 1lessings of $ife; particularly 'ards! ma ing 'ourt+sies in public "laces! and above all! the "leasure of demolishing the Reputations of others! in which innocent Amusement she had an extraordinary &elight. *he therefore determined to submit to any Insult from a *ervant! rather than run a Risque of losing the %itle to so many great "rivileges. *he therefore sent for her *teward! .r. Peter Pounce; and ordered him to pay !oseph his #ages! to strip off his $ivery and turn him out of the (ouse that Evening. *he then called 'lipslop up! and after refreshing her *pirits with a small 'ordial which she ept in her 'loset! she began in the following manner:*lipslop! why will you! who now my passionate %emper! attempt to provo e me by your Answers= I am convinced you are an honest *ervant! and should be very unwilling to part with you. I believe li ewise! you have found me an indulgent .istress on many ,ccasions! and have as little Reason on your side to desire a change. I can+t help being surpri5ed therefore! that you will ta e the surest .ethod to offend me. I mean repeating my #ords! which you now I have always detested.: %he prudent #aiting04entlewoman! had duly weighed the whole .atter! and found on mature &eliberation! that a good "lace in "ossession was better than one in Expectation; as she found her .istress therefore inclined to relent! she thought proper also to put on some small 'ondescension; which was as readily accepted- and so the Affair was reconciled! all ,ffences forgiven! and a "resent of a 4own and "etticoat made her as an Instance of her $ady+s future )avour. *he offered once or twice to spea in favour of !oseph- but found her $ady+s (eart so obdurate! that she prudently dropt all such Efforts. *he considered there were more )ootmen in the (ouse! and some as stout )ellows! tho+ not quite so handsome as !oseph- besides! the Reader hath already seen her tender Advances had not met with the Encouragement she might have reasonably expected. *he thought she had thrown away a great deal of *ac and *weet0meats on an ungrateful Rascal; and being a little inclined to the ,pinion of that female *ect! who hold one lusty young )ellow to be near as good as another lusty young )ellow! she at last gave up !oseph and his 'ause! and with a %riumph over her "assion highly commendable! wal ed off with her "resent! and with great %ranquility paid a visit to a *tone01ottle! which is of sovereign @se to a "hilosophical %emper. *he left not her .istress so easy. %he poor $ady could not reflect! without Agony! that her dear Reputation was in the power of her *ervants. All her 'omfort! as to !oey, was that she hoped he did not understand her .eaning; at least! she could say for herself! she had not plainly express+d any thing to him; and as to .rs. 'lipslop, she imagined she could bribe her to *ecrecy. 1ut what hurt her most was! that in reality she had not so entirely conquered her "assion; the little 4od lay lur ing in her (eart! tho+ Anger and &isdain so hoodwin ed her! that she could not see him. *he was a thousand times on the very 1rin of revo ing the *entence she had passed against the poor Aouth. $ove became his Advocate! and whispered many things in his favour. (onour li ewise endeavoured to vindicate his 'rime! and "ity to mitigate his "unishment; on the other side! "ride and Revenge spo e as loudly against him- and thus the poor $ady was tortured with "erplexity; opposite "assions distracting and tearing her .ind different ways. *o have I seen! in the (all of Westminster; where *er7eant %ramble hath been retained on the right *ide! and *er7eant Pu22le on the left; the 1alance of ,pinion 8so equal were their )ees9 alternately incline to either *cale. /ow %ramble throws in an Argument! and Pu22le*s *cale stri es the 1eam; again! %ramble shares the li e )ate! overpowered by the #eight of Pu22le. (ere %ramble hits! there Pu22le stri es; here one has you! there t+other has you; +till at last all becomes one *cene of 'onfusion in the tortured .inds of the (earers; equal #agers are laid on the *uccess! and neither ?udge nor ?ury can possibly ma e any thing of the .atter; all %hings are so enveloped by the careful *er7eants in &oubts and ,bscurity. ,r as it happens in the 'onscience! where (onour and (onesty pull one way! and a 1ribe and /ecessity another. <If it was only our present 1usiness to ma e *imilies! we could produce many more to this

"urpose- but a *imilie 8as well as a #ord9 to the #ise. #e shall therefore see a little after our (ero! for whom the Reader is doubtless in some pain. '(A". IC. !oseph writes another Letter+ 1is (ransactions with $r. Peter Pounce, :c. with his )eparture from Lady %ooby. %he disconsolate !oseph, would not have had an @nderstanding sufficient for the principal *ub7ect of such a 1oo as this! if he had any longer misunderstood the &rift of his .istress; and indeed that he did not discern it sooner! the Reader will be pleased to apply to an @nwillingless in him to discover what he must condemn in her as a )ault. (aving therefore quitted her "resence! he retired into his own 4arret! and entered himself into an E7aculation on the numberless 'alamities which attended 1eauty! and the .isfortunes it was to be handsomer than one+s /eighbours. (e then sat down and addressed himself to his *ister Pamela, in the following #ords:)ear 'ister Pamela, (oping you are well! what /ews have I to tell youB , Pamela, my .istress is fallen in love with me< %hat is! what great )ol s call falling in love! she has a mind to ruin me; but I hope! I shall have more Resolution and more 4race than to part with my Virtue to any $ady upon0Earth. :.r. Adams has often told me! that 'hastity is as great a Virtue in a .an as in a #oman. (e says he never new any more than his #ife! and I shall endeavour to follow his Examples. Indeed! it is owing entirely to his excellent *ermons and Advice! together with your $etters! that I have been able to resist a %emptation! which he says no .an complies with! but he repents in this #orld! or is damned for it in the next; and why should I trust to Repentance on my &eath0bed! since I may die in my sleep= #hat fine things are good Advice and good ExamplesB 1ut I am glad she turned me out of the 'hamber as she did- for I had once almost forgotten every word "arson Adams had ever said to me. I don+t doubt! dear *ister! but you will have 4race to preserve your Virtue against all %rials; and I beg you earnestly to pray! I may be enabled to preserve mine- for truly! it is very severely attac ed by more than onebut! I hope I shall copy your Example! and that of !oseph, my /ame+s0sa e; and maintain my Virtue against all %emptations.: ?oseph had not finished his $etter! when he was summoned down stairs by .r. Peter Pounce, to receive his #ages- for! besides that out of eight "ounds a Aear! he allowed his )ather and .other four! he had been obliged! in order to furnish himself with musical Instruments! to apply to the 4enerosity of the aforesaid Peter, who! on urgent ,ccasions! used to advance the *ervants their #ages- not before they were due! but before they were payable; that is! perhaps! half a Aear after they were due! and this at the moderate Premiums of fifty per Cent. or a little more; by which charitable .ethods! together with lending .oney to other "eople! and even to his own .aster and .istress! the honest .an had! from nothing! in a few Aears amassed a small *um of twenty thousand "ounds or thereabouts. ?oseph having received his little Remainder of #ages! and having stript off his $ivery! was forced to borrow a )roc and 1reeches of one of the *ervants- 8for he was so beloved in the )amily! that they would all have lent him any thing9 and being told by Peter, that he must nor stay a .oment longer in the (ouse! than was necessary to pac up his $innen! which he easily did in a very narrow 'ompass; he too a melancholy $eave of his )ellow0*ervants! and set out at seven in the Evening. (e had proceeded the length of two or three *treets! before he absolutely determined with himself! whether he should leave the %own this /ight! or procuring a $odging! wait +till the .orning! At last! the .oon! shining very bright! helped him to come to a Resolution of beginning his ?ourney immediately! to which li ewise he had some other Inducements which the Reader! without being a 'on7urer! cannot possibly guess; +till we have given him those hints! which it may be now proper to open. '(A". C. Of several new $atters not e8pected.

It is an ,bservation sometimes made! to indicate our Idea of a simple )ellow! (hat he is easily to be seen through- /or do I believe it a more improper &enotation of a simple 1oo . Instead of applying this to any particular "erformance! we chuse rather to remar the contrary in this (istory! where the *cene opens itself by small degrees! and he is a sagacious Reader who can see two 'hapters before him. )or this reason! we have not hitherto hinted a .atter which now seems necessary to be explained; since it may be wondered at! first! that !oseph made such extraordinary haste out of %own! which hath been already shewn; and secondly! which will be now shewn; that instead of proceeding to the (abitation of his )ather and .other! or to his beloved *ister Pamela, he chose rather to set out full speed to the $ady %ooby*s 'ountry *eat! which he had left on his ?ourney to London. 1e it nown then! that in the same "arish where this *eat stood! there lived a young 4irl whom !oseph 8tho+ the best of *ons and 1rothers9 longed more impatiently to see than his "arents or his *ister. *he was a poor 4irl! who had been formerly bred up in *ir !ohn*s )amily; whence a little before the ?ourney to London, she had been discarded by .rs. 'lipslop on account of her extraordinary 1eauty- for I never could find any other reason. %his young 'reature 8who now lived with a )armer in the "arish9 had been always beloved by !oseph, and returned his Affection. *he was two Aears only younger than our (ero. %hey had been acquainted from their Infancy! and had conceived a very early li ing for each other! which had grown to such a degree of Affection! that .r. Adams had with much ado prevented them from marrying; and persuaded them to wait! +till a few Aears *ervice and %hrift had a little improved their Experience! and enabled them to live comfortably together. %hey followed this good .an+s Advice; as indeed his #ord was little less than a $aw in his "arish- for as he had shewn his "arishioners by a uniform 1ehaviour of thirty0five Aears duration! that he had their 4ood entirely at heart; so they consulted him on every ,ccasion! and very seldom acted contrary to his ,pinion. /othing can be imagined more tender than was the parting between these two $overs. A thousand *ighs heaved the 1osom of !oseph; a thousand %ears distilled from the lovely Eyes of -anny, 8for that was her /ame.9 %ho+ her .odesty would only suffer her to admit his eager 2isses! her violent $ove made her more than passive in his Embraces; and she often pulled him to her 1reast with a soft "ressure! which! tho+ perhaps it would not have squee5ed an Insect to death! caused more Emotion in the (eart of !oseph, than the closest Cornish (ug could have done. %he Reader may perhaps wonder! that so fond a "air should during a %welve0month+s Absence never converse with one another; indeed there was but one Reason which did! or could have prevented them; and that was! that poor -anny could neither write nor read! nor could she be prevailed upon to transmit the &elicacies of her tender and chaste "assion! by the (ands of an Amanuensis. %hey contented themselves therefore with frequent Enquiries after each other+s (ealth! with a mutual 'onfidence in each other+s )idelity! and the "rospect of their future (appiness. (aving explained these .atters to our Reader! and! as far as possible! satisfied all his &oubts! we return to honest !oseph, whom we left 7ust set out on his %ravels by the $ight of the .oon. %hose who have read any Romance or "oetry antient or modern! must have been informed! that $ove hath #ings; by which they are not to understand! as some young $adies by mista e have done! that a $over can fly- the #riters! by this ingenious Allegory! intending to insinuate no more! than that $overs do not march li e (orse04uards; in short! that they put the best $eg foremost! which our lusty Aouth! who could wal with any .an! did so heartily on this ,ccasion! that within four (ours! he reached the famous (ouse of (ospitality well nown to the #estern %raveller. It presents you a $ion on the *ign0"ost- and the .aster! who was christened (imotheus, is commonly called plain (im. *ome have conceived that he hath particularly chosen the $ion for his *ign! as he doth in 'ountenance greatly resemble that magnanimous 1east! tho+ his &isposition favours more of the *weetness of the $amb. (e is a "erson well received among all forts of .en! being qualified to render himself agreeable to any; as he is well versed in (istory and "olitic s! hath a smattering in $aw and &ivinity! crac s a good ?est! and plays wonderfully well on the -rench (orn. A violent *torm of (ail forced !oseph to ta e *helter in this Inn! where he remembered *ir !ohn had dined in his way to %own. !oseph had no sooner seated himself by the 2itchin0)ire! than (imotheus, observing his $ivery began to condole the loss of his late .aster; who was! he said! his very particular and intimate

Acquaintance! with whom he had crac ed many a merry 1ottle! aye many a do5en in his %ime. (e then remar ed that all those %hings were over now! all past! and 7ust as if they had never been; and concluded with an excellent ,bservation on the 'ertainty of &eath! which his #ife said was indeed very true. A )ellow now arrived at the same Inn with two (orses! one of which he was leading farther down into the 'ountry to meet his .aster; these he put into the *table! and came and too his "lace by !oseph*s *ide! who immediately new him to be the *ervant of a neighbouring 4entleman! who used to visit at their (ouse. %his )ellow was li ewise forced in by the *torm; for he had ,rders to go twenty .iles farther that Evening! and luc ily on the same Road which !oseph himself intended to ta e. (e therefore embraced this ,pportunity of complimenting his )riend with his .aster+s (orses! 8notwithstanding he had received express commands to the contrary9 which was readily accepted- and so after they had dran a loving "ot! and the *torm was over! they set out together. '(A". CI. Containing many surpri2ing Adventures, which !oseph Andrews met with on the 7oad, scarce credible by those who have never travelled in a 'tage,Coach. /othing remar able happened on the Road! +till their arrival at the Inn! whither the (orses were ordered; where they came about two in the .orning. %he .oon then shone very bright! and !oseph ma ing his )riend a present of a "int of #ine! and than ing him for the favour of his (orse! notwithstanding all Entreaties to the contrary! proceeded on his ?ourney on foot. (e had not gone above two .iles! charmed with the hopes of shortly seeing his beloved -anny, when he was met by two )ellows in a narrow $ane! and ordered to stand and deliver. (e readily gave them all the .oney he had! which was somewhat less than two "ounds; and told them he hoped they would be so generous as to return him a few *hillings! to defray his 'harges on his way home. ,ne of the Ruffians answered with an ,ath! 4es, we*ll give you something presently+ but first strip and be d ;n*d to you. < 'trip, cry+d the other! or .*ll blow your %rains to the )evil . !oseph, remembring that he had borrowed his 'oat and 1reeches of a )riend; and that he should be ashamed of ma ing any Excuse for not returning them! reply+d! he hoped they would not insist on his 'lothes! which were not worth much; but consider the 'oldness of the /ight. 4ou are cold, are you, you 7ascal B says one of the Robbers! .*ll warm you with a <engeance; and damning his Eyes! snapt a "istol at his (ead- which he had no sooner done! than the other levelled a 1low at him with his *tic ! which !oseph, who was expert at 'udgel0playing! caught with his! and returned the )avour so successfully on his Adversary! that he laid him sprawling at his )eet! and at the same Instant received a 1low from behind! with the 1utt0end of a "istol from the other Villain! which felled him to the 4round! and totally deprived him of his *enses. %he %hief! who had been noc ed down! had now recovered himself; and both together fell to be0labouring poor !oseph with their *tic s! till they were convinced they had put an end to his miserable 1eing- %hey then stript him entirely na ed! threw him into a &itch! and departed with their 1ooty. %he poor #retch! who lay motionless a long time! 7ust began to recover his *enses as a *tage0'oach came by. %he "ostillion hearing a .an+s 4roans! stopt his (orses! and told the 'oachman! :(e was certain there was a dead .an lying in the &itch! for he heard him groan.: :4o on! *irrah!: says the 'oachman! :we are confounded late! and have no time to loo after dead .en.: A $ady! who heard what the "ostillion said! and li ewise heard the 4roan! called eagerly to the 'oachman! :%o stop and see what was the matter.: @pon which he bid the "ostillion :alight! and loo into the &itch.: (e did so! and returned! :%hat there was a .an sitting upright as na ed as ever he was born. < , !;sus,: cry+d the $ady! :A na ed .anB &ear 'oachman! drive on and leave him.: @pon this the 4entlemen got out of the 'oach; and !oseph begged them! :to have .ercy upon him- )or that he had been robbed! and almost beaten to death.: :Robbed!: cries an old 4entleman; :$et us ma e all the haste imaginable! or we shall be robbed too.: A young .an! who belonged to the $aw answered! :(e wished they had past by without ta ing any /otice- 1ut that now they might be proved to have been last in his Company; if he should die! they might be called to some account for his .urther. (e therefore thought it adviseable to save the poor 'reature+s $ife! for their own sa es! if possible; at least! if he died! to prevent the ?ury+s finding that they fled for it. (e was therefore of Opinion, to ta e the

.an into the 'oach! and carry him to the next Inn.: %he $ady insisted! :%hat he should not come into the 'oach. %hat if they lifted him in! she would herself alight- for she had rather stay in that "lace to all Eternity! than ride with a na ed .an.: %he 'oachman ob7ected! :%hat he could not suffer him to be ta en in! unless some body would pay a *hilling for his 'arriage the four .iles.: #hich the two 4entlemen refused to do; but the $awyer! who was afraid of some .ischief happening to himself if the #retch was left behind in that 'ondition! saying! :/o .an could be too cautious in these .atters! and that he remembred very extraordinary 'ases in the 1oo s! threatned the 'oachman! and bid him deny ta ing him up at his "eril; for that if he died! he should be indicted for his .urther! and if he lived! and brought an Action against him! he would willingly ta e a 1rief in it.: %hese #ords had a sensible Effect on the 'oachman! who was well acquainted with the "erson who spo e them; and the old 4entleman abovementioned! thin ing the na ed .an would afford him frequent ,pportunities of shewing his #it to the $ady! offered to 7oin with the 'ompany in giving a .ug of 1eer for his )are; till partly alarmed by the %hreats of the one! and partly by the "romises of the other! and being perhaps a little moved with 'ompassion at the poor 'reature+s 'ondition! who stood bleeding and shivering with the 'old! he at length agreed; and !oseph was now advancing to the 'oach! where seeing the $ady! who held the *tic s of her )an before her Eyes! he absolutely refused! miserable as he was! to enter! unless he was furnished with sufficient 'overing! to prevent giving the least ,ffence to &ecency. *o perfectly modest was this young .an; such mighty Effects had the spotless Example of the amiable Pamela, and the excellent *ermons of .r. Adams wrought upon him. %hough there were several great 'oats about the 'oach! it was not easy to get over this &ifficulty which !oseph had started. %he two 4entlemen complained they were cold! and could not spare a Rag; the .an of #it saying! with a $augh! that Charity began at home ; and the 'oachman! who had two spread under him! refused to lend either! lest they should be made bloody; the $ady+s )ootman desired to be excused for the same Reason! which the $ady herself! notwithstanding her Abhorence of a na ed .an! approved- and it is more than probable! poor !oseph, who obstinately adhered to his modest Resolution! must have perished! unless the "ostillion! 8a $ad who hath been since transported for robbing a (en0roost9 had voluntarily stript off a great 'oat! his only 4arment! at the same time swearing a great ,ath! 8for which he was rebu ed by the "assengers9 :%hat he would rather ride in his *hirt all his $ife! than suffer a )ellow0'reature to lie in so miserable a 'ondition.: ?oseph! having put on the great 'oat! was lifted into the 'oach! which now proceeded on its ?ourney. (e declared himself almost dead with the 'old! which gave the .an of #it an occasion to as the $ady! if she could not accommodate him with a &ram. *he answered with some Resentment! :*he wondered at his as ing her such a >uestion; but assured him! *he never tasted any such thing.: %he $awyer was enquiring into the 'ircumstances of the Robbery! when the 'oach stopt! and one of the Ruffians! putting a "istol in! demanded their .oney of the "assengers; who readily gave it them; and the $ady! in her )right! delivered up a little silver 1ottle! of about a half0pint *i5e! which! the Rogue clapping it to his .outh! and drin ing her (ealth! declared held some of the best antes he had ever tasted- this the $ady afterwards assured the 'ompany was the .ista e of her .aid! for that she had ordered her to fill the 1ottle with 1ungary #ater. As soon as the )ellows were departed! the $awyer! who had! it seems! a 'ase of "istols in the *eat of the 'oach! informed the 'ompany! that if it had been &ay0light! and he could have come at his "istols! he would not have submitted to the Robbery; he li ewise set forth! that he had often met (ighwaymen when he travelled on horsebac ! but none ever durst attac him; concluding! that if he had not been more afraid for the $ady than for himself! he should not have now parted with his .oney so easily. As #it is generally observed to love to reside in empty "oc ets; so the 4entleman! whose Ingenuity we have above remar +d! as soon as he had parted with his .oney! began to grow wonderfully facetious. (e made frequent Allusions to Adam and &ve, and said many excellent things on )igs and )ig0$eaves; which perhaps gave more ,ffence to !oseph than to any other in the 'ompany. %he $awyer li ewise made several very pretty ?ests! without departing from his "rofession. (e said! :If !oseph and the $ady were alone! he would be the more capable of ma ing a Conveyance to her! as his Affairs were not fettered with any .ncumbrance; he+d warrant! he soon suffered a 7ecovery by a #rit of &ntry, which was the proper way to create 1eirs in (ail; that for his own part! he would engage to ma e so firm a

'ettlement in a 'oach! that there should be no &anger of an &=ectment;: with an Inundation of the li e 4ibbrish! which he continued to vent till the 'oach arrived at an Inn! where one *ervant0.aid only was up in readiness to attend the 'oachman! and furnish him with cold .eat and a &ram. !oseph desired to alight! and that he might have a 1ed prepared for him! which the .aid readily promised to perform; and being a good0 natur+d #ench! and not so squeamish as the $ady had been! she clapt a large )aggot on the )ire! and furnishing !oseph with a great 'oat belonging to one of the (ostlers! desired him to sit down and warm himself! whilst she made his 1ed. %he 'oachman! in the mean time! too an ,pportunity to call up a *urgeon! who lived within a few &oors- after which! he reminded his "assengers how late they were! and after they had ta en $eave of !oseph, hurried them off as fast as he could. %he #ench soon got !oseph to bed! and promised to use her Interest to borrow him a *hirt; but imagined! as she afterwards said! by his being so bloody! that he must be a dead .an- she ran with all speed to hasten the *urgeon! who was more than half drest! apprehending that the 'oach had been overturned and some 4entleman or $ady hurt. As soon as the #ench had informed him at his #indow! that it was a poor foot "assenger who had been stripped of all he had! and almost murdered; he chid her for disturbing him so early! slipped off his 'lothes again! and very quietly returned to bed and to sleep. Aurora now began to shew her blooming 'hee s over the (ills! whilst ten .illions of feathered *ongsters! in 7ocund 'horus! repeat ,des a thousand times sweeter than those of our Laureate, and sing both the )ay and the 'ong; when the .aster of the Inn! .r. (ow,wouse, arose! and learning from his .aid an Account of the Robbery! and the *ituation of his poor na ed 4uest! he shoo his (ead! and cried! #ood,lac",a,dayB and then ordered the 4irl to carry him one of his own *hirts. .rs. (ow,wouse was 7ust awa e! and had stretched out her Arms in vain to fold her departed (usband! when the .aid entered the Room. :#ho+s there! %etty=: :Aes .adam.: :#here+s your .aster=: :(e+s without! .adam; he hath sent me for a *hirt to lend to a poor na ed .an! who hath been robbed and murdered.: :%ouch one! if you dare! you *lut!: said .rs. (ow,wouse, :your .aster is a pretty sort of a .an to ta e in na ed Vagabonds! and clothe them with his own 'lothes. I shall have no such &oings.< If you offer to touch any thing! I will throw the 'hamber0"ot at your (ead. 4o! send your .aster to me.: :Aes .adam!: answered %etty. As soon as he came in! she thus began- :#hat the &evil do you mean by this! .r. (ow, wouse= Am I to buy *hirts to lend to a sett of scabby Rascals=: :.y &ear!: said .r. (ow,wouse, :this is a poor #retch.: :Aes!: says she! :I now it is a poor #retch! but what the &evil have we to do with poor #retches= %he $aw ma es us provide! for too many already. #e shall have thirty or forty poor #retches in red 'oats shortly.: :.y &ear!: cries (ow,wouse, :this .an hath been robbed of all he has.: :#ell then!: says she! :where+s his .oney to pay his Rec oning= #hy does not such a )ellow go to an Ale0house= I shall send him pac ing as soon as I am up! I assure you.: :.y &ear!: said he! :common 'harity won+t suffer you to do that.: :'ommon 'harity! a )<tB: says she! :'ommon 'harity teaches us to provide for ourselves! and our )amilies; and I and mine won+t be ruined by your 'harity! I assure you.: :#ell!: says he! :my &ear! do as you will when you are up! you now I never contradict you.: :/o!: says she! :if the &evil was to contradict me! I would ma e the (ouse too hot to hold him.: #ith such li e &iscourses they consumed near half an (our! whilst %etty provided a *hirt from the (ostler! who was one of her *weethearts! and put it on poor !oseph. %he *urgeon had li ewise at last visited him! had washed and drest his #ounds! and was now come to acquaint .r. (ow,wouse, that his 4uest was in such extreme danger of his $ife! that he scarce saw any hopes of his Recovery. <:(ere+s a pretty 2ettle of )ish!: cries .rs. (ow,wouse, :you have brought upon usB #e are li e to have a )uneral at our own expence.: (ow, wouse, 8who notwithstanding his 'harity! would have given his Vote as freely as he ever did at an Election! that any other (ouse in the 2ingdom! should have had quiet "ossession of his 4uest9 answered! :.y &ear! I am not to blame- he was brought hither by the *tage0'oach; and %etty had put him to bed before I was stirring.: :I+ll %etty her!: says she< At which! with half her 4arments on! the other half under her Arm! she sallied out in quest of the unfortunate %etty, whilst (ow,wouse and the *urgeon went to pay a Visit to poor !oseph, and enquire into the 'ircumstance of this melancholy Affair.

'(A". CII. What happened to !oseph during his 'ic"ness at the .nn, with the curious )iscourse between him and $r. %arnabas the Parson of the Parish. As soon as !oseph had communicated a particular (istory of the Robbery! together with a short Account of himself! and his intended ?ourney! he as ed the *urgeon :If he apprehended him to be in any &anger-: %o which the *urgeon very honesty answered! :(e feared he was; for that his "ulse was very exalted and feverish! and if his )ever should prove more than 'ymptomatic", it would be impossible to save him.: !oseph, fetching a deep *igh! cried! : Poor )anny! . would . could have lived to see thee5 but 4<+s Will be done.: %he *urgeon then advised him! :If he had any worldly Affairs to settle! that he would do it as soon as possible; for though he hoped he might recover! yet he thought himself obliged to acquaint him he was in great danger! and if the malign 'oncoction of his (umours should cause a suscitation of his )ever! he might soon grow delirious! and incapable to ma e his #ill.: !oseph answered! :%hat it was impossible for any 'reature in the @niverse to be in a poorer 'ondition than himself- for since the Robbery he had not one thing of any ind whatever! which he could call his own.: . had a poor little Piece of #old which they,too" away, that would be a Comfort to me in all my Afflictions; but surely, -anny, . want nothing to remind me of thee. . have thy dear .mage in my 1eart, and no <illain can ever tear it thence. ?oseph desired "aper and "ens to write a $etter! but they were refused him; and he was advised to use all his Endeavours to compose himself. %hey then left him; and .r. (ow,wouse sent to a 'lergyman to come and administer his good ,ffices to the *oul of poor !oseph, since the *urgeon despaired of ma ing any successful Applications to his 1ody. .r. %arnabas 8for that was the 'lergyman+s /ame came as soon as sent for! and having first dran a &ish of %ea with the $andlady! and afterwards a 1owl of "unch with the $andlord! he wal ed up to the Room where !oseph lay- but! finding him asleep! returned to ta e the other *nea er! which when he had finished! he again crept softly up to the 'hamber0&oor! and! having opened it! heard the *ic .an tal ing to himself in the following manner:, most adorable PamelaB most virtuous *ister! whose Example could alone enable me to withstand all the %emptations of Riches and 1eauty! and to preserve my Virtue pure and chaste! for the Arms of my dear -anny, if it had pleased (eaven that I should ever have come unto them. #hat Riches! or (onours! or "leasures can ma e us amends for the $oss of Innocence= &oth not that alone afford us more 'onsolation! than all worldly Acquisitions= #hat but Innocence and Virtue could give any 'omfort to such a miserable #retch as I am= Aet these can ma e me prefer this sic and painful 1ed to all the "leasures I should have found in my $ady+s. %hese can ma e me face &eath without )ear; and though I love my -anny more than ever .an loved a #oman; these can teach me to resign myself to the &ivine #ill without repining. , thou delightful charming 'reature! would (eaven have indulged thee to my Arms! the poorest! humblest *tate would have been a "aradise; I could have lived with thee in the lowest 'ottage! without envying the "alaces! the &ainties! or the Riches of any .an breathing. 1ut I must leave thee! leave thee for ever! my dearest Angel! I must thin of another #orld! and I heartily pray thou may+st meet 'omfort in this.: < %arnabas thought he had heard enough; so down stairs he went! and told (ow,wouse he could do his 4uest no *ervicefor that he was very light0headed! and had uttered nothing but a Rhapsody of /onsense all the time he stayed in the Room. %he *urgeon returned in the Afternoon! and found his "atient in a higher )ever than when he left him! though not delirious- for notwithstanding .r. %arnabas*s ,pinion! he had not been once out of his *enses since his arrival at the Inn. .r. %arnabas was again sent for! and with much difficulty prevailed on to ma e another Visit. As soon as he entered the Room! he told !oseph, :(e was come to pray by him! and to prepare him for another #orld- In the first place therefore! he hoped he had repented of all his *ins=: !oseph answered! :(e hoped he had- but there was one thing which he new not whether he should call a *in; if it was! he feared he should die in the 'ommission of it! and that was the Regret of parting with a young #oman! whom he loved as tenderly as he did his (eartstrings=: %arnabas bid him be assured! that :any Repining at the &ivine #ill! was one of the

greatest *ins he could commit; that he ought to forget all carnal Affections! and thin of better things.: !oseph said! :%hat neither in this #orld nor the next! he could forget his -anny, and that the %hought! however grievous! of parting from her for ever! was not half so tormenting! as the )ear of what she would suffer when she new his .isfortune.: %arnabas said! :%hat such )ears argued a &iffidence and &espondence very criminal; that he must divest himself of all human "assion! and fix his (eart above.: !oseph answered! :%hat was what he desired to do! and should be obliged to him! if he would enable him to accomplish it.: %arnabas replied! :%hat must be done by 4race.: :!oseph besought him to discover how he might attain it.: %arnabas answered! :1y "rayer and )aith.: (e then questioned him concerning his )orgiveness of the %hieves. !oseph answered! :(e feared! that was more than he could do- for nothing would give him more "leasure than to hear they were ta en.: :%hat!: cries %arnabas, :is for the sa e of ?ustice.: :Aes!: said !oseph, :but if I was to meet them again! I am afraid I should attac them! and ill them too! if I could.: :&oubtless!: answered %arnabas, :it is lawful to ill a %hief- but can you say! you forgive them as a 'hristian ought=: !oseph desired to now what that )orgiveness was. :%hat is! answered %arnabas, to forgive them as<as<it is to forgive them as<in short! it is to forgive them as a 'hristian.: !oseph reply+d! :(e forgave them as much as he could.: :#ell! well!: said %arnabas, :that will do.: :(e then demanded of him! if he remembered any more *ins unrepented of; and if he did! he desired him to ma e haste and repent of them as fast as he could- that they might repeat over a few "rayere together.: !oseph answered! :(e could not recollect any great 'rimes he had been guilty of! and that those he had committed! he was sincerely sorry for.: %arnabas then proceeded to "rayer with all the expedition he was master of- *ome 'ompany then waiting for him below in the "arlour! where the Ingredients for "unch were all in Readiness; but no one would squee5e the ,ranges till he came. ?oseph complained he was dry! and desired a little %ea; which %arnabas reported to .rs. (ow,wouse, who answered! :*he had 7ust done drin ing it! and could not be slopping all day;: but ordered %etty to carry him up some *mall 1eer. 1etty obeyed her .istress+s 'ommands; but !oseph, as soon as he had tasted it! said! he feared it would encrease his )ever! and that he longed very much for %ea- %o which the good0natured %etty answered! he should have %ea! if there was any in the $and; she accordingly went and bought him some herself! and attended him with it; where we will leave her and !oseph together for some time! to entertain the Reader with other .atters. '(A". CIII. %eing very full of Adventures, which succeeded each other at the .nn. It was now the &us of the Evening! when a grave "erson rode into the Inn! and committing his (orse to the (ostler! went directly into the 2itchin! and having called for a "ipe of %obacco! he too his place by the )ire0 side; where several other "ersons were li ewise assembled. %he &iscourse ran altogether on the Robbery which was committed the /ight before! and on the poor #retch! who lay above in the dreadful 'ondition! in which we have already seen him. .rs. (ow,wouse said! :*he wondered what the devil (om Whipwell meant by bringing such 4uests to her (ouse! when there were so many Ale0houses on the Road proper for their Reception= 1ut she assured him! if he died! the "arish should be at the Expence of the )uneral.: *he added! :/othing would serve the )ellow+s %urn but %ea! she would assure him.: %etty, who was 7ust returned from her charitable ,ffice! answered! she believed he was a 4entleman- for she never saw a finer * in in her $ife. :"ox on his * in!: replied .rs. (ow,wouse, :I suppose! that is all we are li e to have for the Rec oning. I desire no such 4entlemen should ever call at the )ragon;: 8which it seems was the *ign of the Inn.9 %he 4entleman lately arrived discovered a great deal of Emotion at the &istress of this poor 'reature! whom he observed not to be fallen into the most compassionate (ands. And indeed! if .rs. (ow,wouse had given no @tterance to the *weetness of her %emper! /ature had ta en such "ains in her 'ountenance! that 1ogarth himself never gave more Expression to a "icture. (er "erson was short! thin! and croo ed. (er )orehead pro7ected in the middle! and thence descended in a &eclivity to the %op of her /ose! which was sharp and red! and would have hung over her $ips! had not

/ature turned up the end of it. (er $ips were two 1its of * in! which! whenever she spo e! she drew together in a "urse. (er 'hin was pec ed! and at the upper end of that * in! which composed her 'hee s! stood two 1ones! that almost hid a "air of small red eyes. Add to this! a Voice most wonderfully adapted to the *entiments it was to convey! being both loud and hoarse. It is not easy to say! whether the 4entleman had conceived a greater &isli e for his $andlady! or 'ompassion for her unhappy 4uest. (e enquired very earnestly of the *urgeon! who was now come into the 2itchin! :#hether he had any hopes of his Recovery=: he begged him! to use all possible means towards it! telling him! :it was the duty of .en of all "rofessions! to apply their * ill gratis for the Relief of the "oor and /ecessitous.: %he *urgeon answered! :he should ta e proper care- but he defied all the *urgeons in London to do him any good.: :"ray! *ir!: said the 4entleman! :#hat are his #ounds=: < :#hy! do you now any thing of #ounds!: says the *urgeon! 8win ing upon .rs. (ow,wouse=9 :*ir! I have a small smattering in *urgery!: answered the 4entleman! :a smattering!<ho! ho! hoB: said the *urgeon! :I believe it is a smattering indeed.: %he 'ompany were all attentive! expecting to hear the &octor! who was what they call a dry )ellow! expose the 4entleman. (e began therefore with an Air of %riumph- :I suppose! *ir! you have travelled.: :/o really! *ir!: said the 4entleman. :(oB then you have practised in the (ospitals! perhaps.: <:/o! *ir!: :(umB not that neither=: :#hence! *ir! then! if I may be so bold to enquire! have you got your 2nowledge in *urgery=: :*ir!: answered the 4entleman! :I do not pretend to much; but! the little I now I have from 1oo s.: :1oo sB: cries the &octor. <:#hat! I suppose you have read #alen and 1ippocratesB: :/o! *ir!: said the 4entleman. :(owB you understand *urgery!: answers the &octor! :and not read #alen and 1ippocratesB: :*ir!: cries the other! :I believe there are many *urgeons who never read these Authors.: :I believe so too!: says the &octor! :more shame for them- but than s to my Education- I have them by heart! and very seldom go without them both in my "oc et.: :%hey are pretty large 1oo s!: said the 4entleman. :Aye!: said the &octor! :I believe I now how large they are better than you.: 8at which he fell a win ing! and the whole 'ompany burst into a $augh.9 %he &octor pursuing his %riumph! as ed the 4entleman! :if he did not understand "hysic as well as *urgery.: :Rather better!: answered the 4entleman.: :Aye! li e enough!: cries the &octor! with a win . :#hy! I now a little of "hysic too.: :I wish I new half so much!: said (ow,wouse, :I+d never wear an Apron again.: :#hy! I believe! $andlord!: cries the &octor! there are few .en! tho+ I say it! within twelve .iles of the "lace! that handle a )ever better. < <eniente occurrite $orbo- %hat is my .ethod! I suppose 1rother! you understand Latin=: :A little!: says the 4entleman.: :Aye! and #ree" now I+ll warrant you- (on dapomibominos poluflosboio (halasses. 1ut I have almost forgot these things! I could have repeated 1omer by heart once.: < EfagsB the 4entleman has got a (raytor,: says .rs. (ow,wouse; at which they all fell a laughing. %he 4entleman! who had not the least affection for 7o ing! very contentedly suffered the &octor to en7oy his Victory; which he did with no small *atisfaction- and having sufficiently sounded his &epth! he told him! :he was thoroughly convinced of his great $earning and Abilities; and that he would be obliged to him! if he would let him now his opinion of his "atient+s 'ase above stairs.: :*ir!: says the &octor! :his 'ase is that of a dead .an. <%he 'ontusion on his (ead has perforated the internal $embrane of the Occiput, and divellicated that radical small minute invisible erve, which coheres to the Pericranium ; and this was attended with a )ever at first symptomatic", then pneumatic", and is at length grown deliruus, or delirious! as the Vulgar express it.: (e was proceeding in this learned manner! when a mighty /oise interrupted him. *ome young )ellows in the /eighbourhood had ta en one of the %hieves! and were bringing him into the Inn. %etty ran up *tairs with this /ews to !oseph; who begged they might search for a little piece of bro en 4old! which had a Ribband tied on it! and which he could swear to amongst all the (oards of the richest .an in the @niverse. /otwithstanding the )ellow+s persisting in his Innocence! the .ob were very busy in searching him! and presently! among other things! pulled out the "iece of 4old 7ust mentioned; which %etty no sooner saw! than she laid violent hands on it! and conveyed it up to !oseph, who received it with raptures of ?oy! and hugging it in his 1osom declared! he could now die contented.

#ithin a few .inutes afterwards! came in some other )ellows! with a 1undle which they had found in a &itch; and which was indeed the 'lothes which had been stripped off from !oseph, and the other things they had ta en from him. %he 4entleman no sooner saw the 'oat! than he declared he new the $ivery; and that if it had been ta en from the poor 'reature above stairs! he desired he might see him- for that he was very well acquainted with the )amily to whom that $ivery belonged. (e was accordingly conducted up by %etty- but what! Reader! was the surpri5e on both sides! when he saw !oseph was the "erson in 1ed; and when !oseph discovered the )ace of his good )riend .r. Abraham Adams. It would be impertinent to insert a &iscourse which chiefly turned on the relation of .atters already well nown to the Reader- for as soon as the 'urate had satisfied !oseph concerning the perfect (ealth of his -anny, he was on his side very inquisitive into all the "articulars which had produced this unfortunate Accident. %o return therefore to the 2itchin! where a great variety of 'ompany were now assembled from all the Rooms of the (ouse! as well as the /eighbourhood- so much delight do .en ta e in contemplating the 'ountenance of a %hief.r. (ow,wouse began to rub his (ands with pleasure! at seeing so large an Assembly; who would! he hoped! shortly ad7ourn into several Apartments! in order to discourse over the Robbery; and drin a (ealth to all honest .en- but .rs. (ow,wouse, whose .isfortune it was commonly to see things a little perversly! began to rail at those who brought the )ellow into her (ouse; telling her (usband! :they were very li ely to thrive! who ept a (ouse of entertainment for 1eggars and %hieves.: %he .ob had now finished their search; and could find nothing about the 'aptive li ely to prove any Evidence- for as to the 'lothes! tho+ the .ob were very well satisfied with that "roof; yet! as the *urgeon observed! they could not convict him! because they were not found in his 'ustody; to which %arnabas agreed- and added! that these were %ona Waviata, and belonged to the $ord of the .anor. :(ow!: says the *urgeon! :do you say these 4oods belong to the $ord of the .anor=: :I do!: cried %arnabas. :%hen I deny it!: says the *urgeon. :#hat can the $ord of the .anor have to do in the 'ase= #ill any one attempt to persuade me that what a .an finds is not his own=: :I have heard!: 8says an old )ellow in the 'orner9 :?ustice Wise,one say! that if every .an had his right! whatever is found belongs to the 2ing of London.: :%hat may be true!: says %arnabas, :in some sense- for the $aw ma es a difference between things stolen! and things found- for a thing may be stolen that never is found; and a thing may be found that never was stolen. /ow 4oods that are both stolen and found are Waviata; and they belong to the $ord of the .anor.: :*o the $ord of the .anor is the Receiver of stolen 4oods-: 8says the &octor9 at which there was a universal $augh! being first begun by himself. #hile the "risoner! by persisting in his Innocence! had almost 8as there was no Evidence against him9 brought over %arnabas, the *urgeon! (ow,wouse, and several others to his side; %etty informed them! that they had over0loo ed a little "iece of 4old! which she had carried up to the .an in bed; and which he offered to swear to amongst a .illion! aye! amongst ten %housand. %his immediately turned the *cale against the "risoner; and every one now concluded him guilty. It was resolved therefore! to eep him secured that /ight! and early in the .orning to carry him before a ?ustice. '(A". CIV. 'hewing how $rs. (ow,wouse was a little mollified; and how officious $r. %arnabas and the 'urgeon were to prosecute the (hief+ With a )issertation accounting for their >eal; and that of many other Persons not mentioned in this 1istory. %etty told her .istress! she believed the .an in 1ed was a greater .an than they too him for- for besides the extreme #hiteness of his * in! and the *oftness of his (ands; she observed a very great )amiliarity between the 4entleman and him; and added! she was certain they were intimate Acquaintance! if not Relations.

%his somewhat abated the severity of .rs. (ow,wouse*s 'ountenance. *he said! :4od forbid she should not discharge the duty of a 'hristian! since the poor 4entleman was brought to her (ouse. *he had a natural antipathy to Vagabonds- but could pity the .isfortunes of a 'hristian as soon as another.: (ow,wouse said! :If the %raveller be a 4entleman! tho+ he hath no .oney about him now! we shall most li ely be paid hereafter; so you may begin to score whenever you will.: 1arnabas! and the *urgeon went up to !oseph, to satisfy themselves concerning the piece of 4old. !oseph was with difficulty prevailed upon to shew it them; but would by no Entreaties be brought to deliver it out of his own "ossession. (e! however! attested this to be the same which had been ta en from him; and %etty was ready to swear to the finding it on the %hief. %he only &ifficulty that remained! was how to produce this 4old before the ?ustice- for as to carrying !oseph himself! it seemed impossible; nor was there any greater li elihood of obtaining it from him- for he had fastened it with a Ribband to his Arm! and solemnly vowed! that nothing but irresistible )orce should ever separate them; which Resolution! .r. Adams, in clenching a )ist rather less than the 2nuc le of an ,x! declared he would support him. A &ispute arose on this ,ccasion concerning Evidence! not very necessary to be related here; after which the *urgeon dress+d .r. !oseph*s (ead; still persisting in the imminent &anger in which his "atient lay- but concluding with a very important $oo ! :that he began to have some hopes; that he should send him a 'anative soporiferous &raught! and would see him in the .orning.: After which %arnabas and he departed! and left .r. !oseph and .r. Adams together. Adams informed !oseph of the occasion of this ?ourney which he was ma ing to London, namely to publish three Volumes of *ermons; being encouraged! he said! by an Advertisement lately set forth by a *ociety of 1oo sellers! who proposed to purchase any 'opies offered to them at a "rice to be settled by two "ersonsbut tho+ he imagined he should get a considerable *um of .oney on this occasion! which his )amily were in urgent need of; he protested! :he would not leave !oseph in his present 'ondition-: finally! he told him! :he had nine *hillings and three0pence0half0penny in his "oc et! which he was welcome to use as he pleased.: %his 4oodness of "arson Adams brought %ears into !oseph*s Eyes; he declared he had now a second Reason to desire life! that he might shew his 4ratitude to such a )riend.: Adams bid him be chearful! for that he plainly saw the *urgeon! besides his Ignorance! desired to ma e a .erit of curing him! tho+ the #ounds in his (ead! he perceived! were by no means dangerous; that he was convinced he had no )ever! and doubted not but he would be able to travel in a day or two.: %hese #ords infused a *pirit into !oseph; he said! :he found himself very sore from the 1ruises! but had no reason to thin any of his 1ones in7ured! or that he had received any (arm in his Inside; unless that he felt something very odd in his *tomach- but new not whether that might not arise from not having eaten one .orsel for above twenty0four (ours.: 1eing then as ed! if he had any Inclination to eat! he answered in the Affirmative; then "arson Adams desired him to name what he had the greatest fancy for; whether a poached Egg! or 'hic en0broth- he answered! :he could eat both very well; but that he seemed to have the greatest Appetite for a piece of boiled 1eef and 'abbage.: Adams was pleased with so perfect a 'onfirmation that he had not the least )ever- but advised him to a lighter &iet! for that Evening. (e accordingly eat either a Rabbit or a )owl! I never could with any tolerable 'ertainty discover which; was by .rs. (ow,wouse*s order conveyed into a better 1ed! and equipped with one of her (usband+s *hirts. In the .orning early! %arnabas and the *urgeon came to the Inn! in order to see the %hief conveyed before the ?ustice. %hey had consumed the whole /ight in debating what .easures they should ta e to produce the "iece of 4old in Evidence against him- for they were both extremely 5ealous in the 1usiness! tho+ neither of them were in the least interested in the "rosecution; neither of them had ever received any private In7ury from the )ellow! nor had either of them ever been suspected of loving the "ublic well enough! to give them a *ermon or a &ose of "hysic for nothing. %o help our Reader therefore as much as possible to account for this Deal! we must inform him! that as this "arish was so unfortunate to have no $awyer in it; there had been a constant 'ontention between the two &octors! spiritual and physical! concerning their Abilities in a *cience! in which! as neither of them professed it! they had equal "retensions to dispute each other+s ,pinions. %hese &isputes were carried on with great

'ontempt on both sides! and had almost divided the "arish; .r. (ow,wouse and one half of the /eighbours inclining to the *urgeon! and .rs. (ow,wouse with the other half to the "arson. %he *urgeon drew his 2nowledge from those inestimable )ountains! called the Attorney*s Poc"et,Companion, and .r. !acob*s Law,(ables; %arnabas, trusted entirely to Wood*s .nstitutes. It happened on this ,ccasion! as was pretty frequently the 'ase! that these two learned .en differed about the sufficiency of Evidence- the &octor being of opinion! that the .aid+s ,ath would convict the "risoner without producing the 4old; the "arson! ? contra, totis viribus. %o display their "arts therefore before the ?ustice and the "arish was the sole .otive! which we can discover! to this Deal! which both of them pretended to be for public ?ustice. , VanityB (ow little is thy )orce ac nowledged! or thy ,perations discerned= (ow wantonly dost thou deceive .an ind under different &isguises= *ometimes thou dost wear the )ace of "ity! sometimes of 4enerosity- nay! thou hast the Assurance even to put on those glorious ,rnaments which belong only to heroic Virtue. %hou odious! deformed .onsterB whom "riests have railed at! "hilosophers despised! and "oets ridiculed- Is there a #retch so abandoned as to own thee for an Acquaintance in public = yet! how few will refuse to en7oy thee in private= nay! thou art the "ursuit of most .en through their $ives. %he greatest Villanies are daily practised to please thee- nor is the meanest %hief below! or the greatest (ero above thy notice. %hy Embraces are often the sole Aim and sole Reward of the private Robbery! and the plundered "rovince. It is! to pamper up thee! thou (arlot! that we attempt to withdraw from others what we do not want! or to withhold from them what they do. All our "assions are thy *laves. Avarice itself is often no more than thy (and0maid! and even $ust thy "imp. %he 1ully )ear li e a 'oward! flies before thee! and ?oy and 4rief hide their (eads in thy "resence. I 2now thou wilt thin ! that whilst I abuse thee! I court thee; and that thy $ove hath inspired me to write this sarcastical "anegyric on thee- but thou art deceived! I value thee not of a farthing; nor will it give me any "ain! if thou should+st prevail on the Reader to censure this &igression as errant /onsense- for now to thy 'onfusion! that I have introduced thee for no other "urpose than to lengthen out a short 'hapter; and so I return to my (istory. '(A". CV. (he escape of the (hief. $r. Adams*s )isappointment. (he Arrival of two very e8traordinary Personages, and the .ntroduction of Parson Adams to Parson %arnabas. %arnabas and the *urgeon being returned! as we have said! to the Inn! in order to convey the %hief before the ?ustice! were greatly concerned to find a small Accident had happened which somewhat disconcerted them; and this was no other than the %hief+s Escape! who had modestly withdrawn himself by /ight! declining all ,stentation! and not chusing! in imitation of some great .en! to distinguish himself at the Expence of being pointed at. #hen the 'ompany had retired the Evening before! the %hief was detained in a Room where the 'onstable! and one of the young )ellows who too him! were planted as his 4uard. About the second #atch! a general 'omplaint of &rowth was made both by the "risoner and his 2eepers. Among whom it was at last agreed! that the 'onstable should remain on &uty! and the young )ellow should call up the %apster; in which &isposition the young )ellow apprehended not the least &anger! as the 'onstable was well armed! and could besides easily summon him bac to his Assistance! if the "risoner made the least Attempt to gain his $iberty. %he young )ellow had not long left the Room! before it came into the 'onstable+s (ead! that the "risoner might leap on him by surpri5e! and thereby! preventing him of the use of his #eapons! especially the long *taff in which he chiefly confided! might reduce the *uccess of a *truggle to an equal 'hance. (e wisely therefore! to prevent this Inconvenience! slipt out of the Room himself and loc ed the &oor! waiting without with his *taff in his (and! ready lifted to fell the unhappy "risoner! if by ill )ortune he should attempt to brea out. 1ut as it hath been discovered by some great .an or other! 8for I would by no means be he understood to affect the (onour of ma ing any such &iscovery9 human $ife very much resembles a 4ame at Chess- for! as in the latter! while a 4amester is too attentive to secure himself very strongly on one side the 1oard! he is apt to leave an unguarded ,pening on the other; so doth it often happen in $ife; and so did it happen on this

,ccasion- for whilst the cautious 'onstable with such wonderful *agacity had possessed himself of the &oor! he most unhappily forgot the #indow. %he %hief who played on the other side! no sooner perceived this ,pening! than he began to move that way; and finding the "assage easy! he too with him the young )ellow+s (at; and without any 'eremony! stepped into the *treet! and made the best of his #ay. %he young )ellow returning with a double .ug of *trong 1eer was a little surpri5ed to find the 'onstable at the &oor- but much more so! when! the &oor being opened! he perceived the "risoner had made his Escape! and which way- he threw down the 1eer! and without uttering any thing to the 'onstable! except a hearty 'urse or two! he nimbly leapt out at the #indow! and went again in pursuit of his "rey- being very unwilling to lose the Reward which he had assured himself of. %he 'onstable hath not been discharged of *uspicion on this account- It hath been said! that not being concerned in the ta ing the %hief! he could not have been entitled to any part of the Reward! if he had been convicted. %hat the %hief had several 4uineas in his "oc et; that it was very unli ely he should have been guilty of such an ,versight. %hat his "retence for leaving the Room was absurd- that it was his constant .axim! that a wise .an never refused .oney on any 'onditions- %hat at every Election! he always had sold his Vote to both "arties! Ec. 1ut notwithstanding these and many other such Allegations! I am sufficiently convinced of his Innocence; having been positively assured of it! by those who received their Informations from his own .outh. All the )amily were now up! and with many others assembled in the 2itchin! where .r. (ow,wouse was in some %ribulation; the *urgeon having declared! that by $aw! he was liable to be indicted for the %hief+s Escape! as it was out of his (ouse- (e was a little comforted however by .r. %arnabas*s ,pinion! that as the Escape was by /ight! the Indictment would not lie. .rs. (ow,wouse delivered herself in the following #ords- :*ure never was such a )ool as my (usbandB would any other "erson living have left a .an in the 'ustody of such a drun en! drowsy 1loc head as (om 'uc"bribe;: 8which was the 'onstable+s /ame9 :and if he could be indicted without any harm to his #ife and 'hildren! I should be glad of it.: 8%hen the 1ell rung in !oseph*s Room9 :#hy %etty, !ohn Chamberlain, where the &evil are you all= (ave you no Ears! or no 'onscience! not to tend the *ic better= <*ee what the 4entleman wants; why don+t you go yourself! .r. (ow,wouse= but any one may die for you; you have no more feeling than a &eal01oard. If a .an lived a )ortnight in your (ouse without spending a "enny! you would never put him in mind of it. *ee whether he drin s %ea or 'offee for 1rea fast.: :Aes! my &ear!: cry+d (ow,wouse. *he then as ed the &octor and .r. %arnabas what .orning+s &raught they chose! who answered! they had a "ot of 'yder,and, at the )ire; which we will leave them merry over! and return to !oseph. (e had rose pretty early this .orning- but tho+ his #ounds were far from threatning any danger! he was so sore with the 1ruises! that it was impossible for him to thin of underta ing a ?ourney yet; .r. Adams therefore! whose *toc was visibly decreased with the Expences of *upper and 1rea fast! and which could not survive that &ay+s *coring! began to consider how it was possible to recruit it. At last he cry+d! :(e had luc ily hit on a sure .ethod! and though it would oblige him to return himself together with !oseph, it mattered not much.: (e then sent for (ow,wouse, and ta ing him into another Room! told him! :(e wanted to borrow three 4uineas! for which he would put ample *ecurity in his (ands.: (ow,wouse who expected a #atch! or Ring! or something of double the Value! answered! :(e believed he could furnish him.: @pon which Adams pointing to his *addle01ag told him with a )ace and Voice full of *olemnity! :that there were in that 1ag no less than nine Volumes of .anuscript *ermons! as well worth a hundred "ound as a *hilling was worth twelve "ence! and that he would deposite one of the Volumes in his (ands by way of "ledge; not doubting but that he would have the (onesty to return it on his Repayment of the .oney- for otherwise he must be a very great loser! seeing that every Volume would at least bring him ten "ounds! as he had been informed by a neighbouring 'lergyman in the 'ountry- for! said he! as to my own part! having never yet dealt in "rinting! I do not pretend to ascertain the exact Value of such things.: %ow0wouse! who was a little surpri5ed at the "awn! said 8and not without some %ruth9 :%hat he was no ?udge of the "rice of such ind of 4oods; and as for .oney! he really was very short.: Adams answered! :'ertainly he would not scruple to lend him three 4uineas! on what was certainly worth at least ten.: %he $andlord

replied! :(e did not believe he had so much .oney in the (ouse! and besides he was to ma e up a *um. (e was very confident the 1oo s were of much higher Value! and heartily sorry it did not suit him.: (e then cry+d out! Coming 'irB though no body called! and ran down *tairs without any )ear of brea ing his /ec . "oor Adams was extremely de7ected at this &isappointment! nor new he what farther *tratagem to try. (e immediately apply+d to his "ipe! his constant )riend and 'omfort in his Afflictions; and leaning over the Rails! he devoted himself to .editation! assisted by the inspiring )umes of %obacco. (e had on a /ight0'ap drawn over his #ig! and a short great 'oat! which half covered his 'assoc ; a &ress! which added to something comical enough in his 'ountenance! composed a )igure li ely to attract the Eyes of those who were not over0given to ,bservation. #hilst he was smoa ing his "ipe in this "osture! a 'oach and *ix! with a numerous Attendance! drove into the Inn. %here alighted from the 'oach a young )ellow! and a 1race of "ointers! after which another young )ellow leapt from the 1ox! and shoo the former by the hand! and both together with the &ogs were instantly conducted by .r. (ow,wouse into an Apartment; whither as they passed! they entertained themselves with the following short facetious &ialogue. :Aou are a pretty )ellow or a 'oachman! !ac"B: says he from the 'oach! :you had almost overturned us 7ust now.: :"ox ta e you!: says the 'oachman! :if I had only bro e your /ec ! it would have been saving somebody else the trouble- but I should have been sorry for the "ointers.: :#hy! you *on of a 1<!: answered the other! :if no body could shoot better than you! the "ointers would be of no use.: :&<n me!: says the 'oachman! :I will shoot with you! five 4uineas a *hot.: :Aou be hang+d!: says the other! :for five 4uineas you shall shoot at my A<.: :&one!: says the 'oachman! :I+ll pepper you better than ever you was peppered by !enny %ouncer.: :"epper your 4rand0mother!: says the other! :here+s (ow,wouse will let you shoot at him for a *hilling a time.: :I now his (onour better!: cries (ow,wouse, :I never saw a surer shot at a "artridge. Every .an misses now and then; but if I could shoot half as well as his (onour! I would desire no better $ivelihood than I could get by my 4un.: :"ox on you!: said the 'oachman! :you demolish more 4ame now than your (ead+s worth. %here+s a 1itch! (ow,wouse, by 4< she never blin"ed a 1ird in her $ife.: :I have a "uppy! not a Aear old! shall hunt with her for a hundred!: cries the other 4entleman. :&one!: says the 'oachman! :but you will be pox+d before you ma e the 1ett. If you have a mind for a 1ett! cries the 'oachman! I will match my spotted &og with your white 1itch for a hundred! play or pay.: :&one!: says the other! :and I+ll run %aldface against 'louch with you for another.: :/o!: cries he from the 1ox! :but I+ll venture $iss !enny against %aldface, or 1annibal either.: :4o to the &evil!: cries he from the 'oach! :I will ma e every 1ett your own way! to be sureB I will match 1annibal with 'louch for a thousand! if you dare! and I say done first.: %hey were now arrived! and the Reader will be very contented to leave them! and repair to the 2itchin! where %arnabas, the *urgeon! and an Exciseman were smoa ing their "ipes over some 'yderand, whither the *ervants! who attended the two noble 4entlemen we have 7ust seen alight! were now arrived. :%om!: cries of the )ootmen! :there+s "arson Adams smoa ing his "ipe in the 4allery.: :Aes!: says (om, :I pulled off my (at to him! and the "arson spo e to me.: :Is the 4entleman a 'lergyman then=: says %arnabas, 8for his 'assoc had been tied up when first he arrived!9 :Aes! *ir!: answered the )ootman! :and one there be but few li e.: :Ay!: said %arnabas, :if I had nown it sooner! I should have desired his 'ompany; but what say you! &octor! shall we ad7ourn into a Room! and invite him to ta e part of a 1owl of "unch=: %his "roposal was immediately agreed to! and executed; and "arson Adams accepting the Invitation; much 'ivility passed between the two 'lergymen! who both declared the great (onour they had for the 'loth. %hey had not been long together before they entered into a &iscourse on small %ithes! which continued a full (our! without the &octor or the Exciseman+s having one ,pportunity to offer a #ord. It was then proposed to begin a general 'onversation and the Exciseman opened on foreign Affairs- but a #ord unluc ily dropping from one of them introduced a &issertation on the (ardships suffered by the inferiour 'lergy; which! after a long &uration! concluded with bringing the three Volumes of *ermons on the 'arpet. 1arnabas greatly discouraged poor Adams; he said! :%he Age was so wic ed! that no body read *ermons#ould you thin it! .r. Adams, 8said he9 I once intended to print a Volume of *ermons myself! and they had

the Approbation of two or three 1ishops- but what do you thin a 1oo seller offered me=: :%welve 4uineas perhaps 8cried Adams.9: :/ot %welve "ence! I assure you!: answered %arnabas, :nay the &og refused me a 'oncordance in Exchange. <At last! I offered to give him the printing them! for the sa e of dedicating them to that very 4entleman who 7ust now drove his own 'oach into the Inn! and I assure you! he had the Impudence to refuse my ,ffer- by which means I lost a good $iving! that was afterwards given away in exchange for a "ointer! to one who<but I will not say any thing against the 'loth. *o you may guess! .r. Adams, what you are to expect; for if *ermons would have gone down! I believe<I will not be vain- but to be concise with you! three 1ishops said! they were the best that ever were writ- but indeed there are a pretty moderate number printed already! and not all sold yet.: <:"ray! *ir!: says Adams, :to what do you thin the /umbers may amount= :*ir!: answered %arnabas, :a 1oo seller told me he believed five thousand Volumes at least.: :)ive thousandB: quoth the *urgeon! :what can they be writ upon= I remember! when I was a 1oy! I used to read one (illotson*s *ermons; and I am sure! if a .an practised half so much as is in one of those *ermons! he will go to (eaven.: :&octor!: cried %arnabas, :you have a profane way of tal ing! for which I must reprove you. A .an can never have his &uty too frequently inculcated into him. And as for (illotson, to be sure he was a good #riter! and said things very well- but 'omparisons are odious! another .an may write as well as he<I believe there are some of my *ermons!:<and then he apply+d the 'andle to his "ipe. <:And I believe there are some of my &iscourses!: cries Adams, :which the 1ishops would not thin totally unworthy of being printed; and I have been informed! I might procure a very large *um 8indeed an immense one9 on them.: :I doubt that;: answered %arnabas- :however! if you desire to ma e some .oney of them! perhaps you may sell them by advertising the $anuscript 'ermons of a Clergyman lately deceased, all warranted Originals, and never printed. And now I thin of it! I should be obliged to you! if there be ever a )uneral one among them! to lend it me- for I am this very day to preach a )uneral *ermon! for which I have not penned a $ine! though I am to have a double "rice.: Adams answered! :(e had but one! which he feared would not serve his purpose! being sacred to the .emory of a .agistrate! who had exerted himself very singularly in the "reservation of the .orality of his /eighbours! insomuch! that he had neither Ale0house! nor lewd #omen in the "arish where he lived:.< :/o!: replied %arnabas, :that will not do quite so well; for the &eceased! upon whose Virtues I am to harangue! was a little too much addicted to $iquor! and public ly ept a .istress. <I believe I must ta e a common *ermon! and trust to my .emory to introduce something handsome on him.: :<%o your Invention rather!: 8said the &octor9 :your .emory will be apter to put you out- for no .an living remembers any thing good of him.: #ith such ind of spiritual &iscourse! they emptied the 1owl of "unch! paid their Rec oning! and separatedAdams and the &octor went up to !oseph; "arson %arnabas departed to celebrate the aforesaid &eceased! and the Exciseman descended into the 'ellar to gage the Vessels. ?oseph was now ready to sit down to a $oin of .utton! and waited for .r. Adams, when he and the &octor came in. %he &octor having felt his "ulse! and examined his #ounds! declared him much better! which he imputed to that 'anative soporiferous )raught, a .edicine! :whose Virtues!: he said! :were never to be sufficiently extolled-: And great indeed they must be! if !oseph was so much indebted to them as the &octor imagined! since nothing more than those Effluvia! which escaped the 'or ! could have contributed to his Recovery- for the .edicine had stood untouched in the #indow ever since its arrival. ?oseph passed that day and the three following with his )riend Adams, in which nothing so remar able happened as the swift "rogress of his Recovery. As he had an excellent (abit of 1ody! his #ounds were now almost healed! and his 1ruises gave him so little uneasiness! that he pressed .r. Adams to let him depart! told him he should never be able to return sufficient %han s for all his )avours; but begged that he might no longer delay his ?ourney to London. Adams! notwithstanding the Ignorance! as he conceived it! of .r. (ow,wouse, and the Envy 8for such he thought it9 of .r. %arnabas, had great Expectations from his *ermons- seeing therefore !oseph in so good a way! he told him he would agree to his setting out the next .orning in the *tage0'oach! that he believed he should have sufficient after the Rec oning paid! to procure him one &ay+s 'onveyance in it! and afterwards he would be able to get on! on foot! or might be favoured with a lift in some /eighbour+s #aggon! especially as there was then to be a )air in the %own whither the 'oach would carry him! to which /umbers from his "arish resorted. <And as to himself! he agreed to proceed to the great 'ity.

%hey were now wal ing in the Inn Aard! when a fat! fair! short "erson rode in! and alighting from his (orse went directly up to %arnabas, who was smoa ing his "ipe on a 1ench. %he "arson and the *tranger shoo one another very lovingly by the (and! and went into a Room together. %he Evening now coming on! !oseph retired to his 'hamber! whither the good Adams accompanied him; and too this ,pportunity to expatiate on the great .ercies 4od had lately shewn him! of which he ought not only to have the deepest inward *ense; but li ewise to express outward %han fulness for them. %hey therefore fell both on their 2nees! and spent a considerable time in "rayer and %han sgiving. %hey had 7ust finished! when %etty came in and told .r. Adams, .r. %arnabas desired to spea to him on some 1usiness of 'onsequence below *tairs. !oseph desired! if it was li ely to detain him long! he would let him now it! that he might go to 1ed! which Adams promised! and in that 'ase! they wished one another good /ight. '(A". CVI. A pleasant )iscourse between the two Parsons and the %oo"seller, which was bro"e off by an unluc"y Accident happening in the .nn, which produced a )ialogue between $rs. (ow,wouse and her $aid of no gentle "ind. As soon as Adams came into the Room! .r. %arnabas introduced him to the *tranger! who was! he told him! a 1oo seller! and would be as li ely to deal with him for his *ermons as any .an whatever. Adams, saluting the *tranger! answered %arnabas, that he was very much obliged to him! that nothing could be more convenient! for he had no other 1usiness to the great 'ity! and was heartily desirous of returning with the young .an who was 7ust recovered of his .isfortune. (e then snapt his )ingers 8as was usual with him9 and too two or three turns about the Room in an Extasy. <And to induce the 1oo seller to be as expeditious as possible! as li ewise to offer him a better "rice for his 'ommodity! he assured him! their meeting was extremely luc y to himself- for that he had the most pressing ,ccasion for .oney at that time! his own being almost spent! and having a )riend then in the same Inn who was 7ust recovered from some #ounds he had received from Robbers! and was in a most indigent 'ondition. As soon as he had seated himself! the *tranger began in these #ords! :*ir! I do not care absolutely to deny engaging in what my )riend .r. %arnabas recommends- but *ermons are mere &rugs. %he %rade is so vastly stoc ed with them! that really unless they come out with the /ame of Whitfield or Westley, or some other such great .an! as a 1ishop! or those sort of "eople! I don+t care to touch! unless now it was a *ermon preached on the @Ath of !anuary, or we could say in the %itle "age! published at the earnest 7eBuest of the 'ongregation! or the Inhabitants- but truly for a dry "iece of *ermons! I had rather be excused; especially as my (ands are so full at present. (owever! *ir! as .r. %arnabas mentioned them to me! I will! if you please! ta e the .anuscript with me to %own! and send you my ,pinion of it in a very short time.: ,! said Adams, if you desire it! I will read two or three &iscourses as a *pecimen. %his %arnabas, who loved *ermons no better than a 4rocer doth )igs! immediately ob7ected to! and advised Adams to let the 1oo seller have his *ermons; telling him! if he gave him a &irection! he might be certain of a speedy Answer- Adding! he need not scruple trusting them in his "ossession. /o! said the 1oo seller! if it was a "lay that had been acted twenty /ights together! I believe it would be safe. Adams did not at all relish the last Expression; he said! he was sorry to hear *ermons compared to "lays! :/ot by me! I assure you!: cry+d the 1oo seller! though I don+t now whether the licensing Act may not shortly bring them to the same footing- but I have formerly nown a hundred 4uineas given for a "lay<.: :.ore shame for those who gave it!: cry+d %arnabas. :#hy so=: said the 1oo seller! :for they got hundreds by it.: :1ut is there no difference between conveying good or ill Instructions to .an ind=: said Adams; :would not an honest .ind rather lose .oney by the one! than gain it by the the other=: :If you can find any such! I will not be their (inderance!: answered the 1oo seller! :but I thin those "ersons who get by preaching *ermons! are the properest to lose by printing them- for my part! the 'opy that fells best! will be always the best 'opy in my ,pinion; I am no Enemy to *ermons but because they don+t sell- for I would as soon print one of Whitfield*s, as any )arce whatever.:

:#hoever prints such (eterodox *tuff! ought to be hanged!: says %arnabas. :*ir!: said he! turning to Adams, this )ellow+s #ritings 8I now not whether you have seen them9 are levelled at the 'lergy. (e would reduce us to the Example of the "rimitive Ages forsoothB and would insinuate to the "eople! that a 'lergyman ought to be always preaching and praying. (e pretends to understand the *cripture literally! and would ma e .an ind believe! that the "overty and low Estate! which was recommended to the 'hurch in its Infancy! and was only temporary &octrine adapted to her under "ersecution! was to be preserved in her flourishing and established *tate. *ir! the "rinciples of (oland, Woolston, and all the )ree0%hin ers! are not calculated to do half the .ischief! as those professed by this )ellow and his )ollowers.: :*ir!: answered Adams, :if .r. Whitfield had carried his &octrine no farther than you mention! I should have remained! as I once was! his #ell0#isher. I am myself as great an Enemy to the $uxury and *plendour of the 'lergy as he can be. I do not! more than he! by the flourishing Estate of the 'hurch! understand the "alaces! Equipages! &ress! )urniture! rich &ainties! and vast )ortunes of her .inisters. *urely those! which favour so strongly of this #orld! become not the *ervants of ore who professed his 2ingdom was not of it- but when he began to call /onsense and Enthusiasm in to his Aid! and to set up the detestable &octrine of )aith against good #or s! I was his )riend no longer; for surely! that &octrine was coined in (ell! and one would thin none but the &evil himself could have the 'onfidence to preach it. )or can any thing be more derogatory to the (onour of 4od! than for .en to imagine that the All0wise 1eing will hereafter say to the 4ood and Virtuous! otwithstanding the Purity of thy Life, notwithstanding that constant 7ule of <irtue and #oodness in which you wal"ed upon &arth, still as thou did*st not believe every thing in the true Orthodo8 manner, thy want of -aith shall condemn thee= ,r on the other side! can any &octrine have a more pernicious Influence on *ociety than a "ersuasion! that it will be a good "lea for the Villain at the last day; Lord, it is true . never obeyed one of thy Commandments, yet punish me not, for . believe them all =: :I suppose! *ir!: said the 1oo seller! :your *ermons are of a different 2ind.: :Ay! *ir!: said Adams, :the contrary! I than (eaven! is inculcated in almost every "age! or I should belye my own ,pinion! which hath always been! that a virtuous and good (ur", or (eathen! are more acceptable in the sight of their 'reator! than a vicious and wic ed 'hristian! tho+ his )aith was as perfectly ,rthodox as *t. Paul*s himself.: <:I wish you *uccess!: says the 1oo seller! :but must beg to be excused! as my (ands are so very full at present; and indeed I am afraid! you will find a 1ac wardness in the %rade! to engage in a 1oo which the 'lergy would be certain to cry down.: :4od forbid!: says Adams, any 1oo s should be propagated which the 'lergy would cry down- but if you mean by the 'lergy! some few designing factious .en! who have it at (eart to establish some favourite *chemes at the "rice of the $iberty of .an ind! and the very Essence of Religion! it is not in the power of such "ersons to decry any 1oo they please; witness that excellent 1oo called! A Plain Account of the ature and &nd of the 'acrament; a 1oo written 8if I may venture on the Expression9 with the "en of an Angel! and calculated to restore the true @se of 'hristianity! and of that *acred Institution- for what could tend more to the noble "urposes of Religion! than frequent cheerful .eetings among the .embers of a *ociety! in which they should in the "resence of one another! and in the *ervice of the supreme 1eing! ma e "romises of being good! friendly and benevolent to each other= /ow this excellent 1oo was attac ed by a "arty! but unsuccessfully.: At these #ords %arnabas fell a ringing with all the Violence imaginable! upon which a *ervant attending! he bid him :bring a 1ill immediately- for that he was in 'ompany! for aught he new! with the &evil himself; and he expected to hear the Alcoran! the $eviathan! or Woolston commended! if he staid a few .inutes longer.: Adams desired! :as he was so much moved at his mentioning a 1oo ! which he did without apprehending any possibility of ,ffence! that he would be so ind to propose any ,b7ections he had to it! which he would endeavour to answer.: :I propose ,b7ectionsB: said %arnabas, :I never read a *yllable in any such wic ed 1oo ; I never saw it in my $ife! I assure you.: < Adams was going to answer! when a most hideous @proar began in the Inn. .rs. (ow,wouse, .r. (ow,wouse, and %etty, all lifting up their Voices together- but .rs. (ow,wouse*s Voice! li e a 1ass Viol in a 'oncert! was clearly and distinctly distinguished among the rest! and was heard to articulate the following *ounds. <, you damn+d Villain! is this the Return to all the 'are I have ta en of your )amily= %his the Reward of my Virtue= Is this the manner in which you behave to one who brought you a )ortune! and preferred you to so many .atches! all your 1etters= %o abuse my 1ed! my own 1ed! with my own *ervant- but I+ll maul the *lut! I+ll tear her nasty Eyes out; was ever such a pitiful &og! to ta e up with such a mean %rollop= If she had been a

4entlewoman li e my self! it had been some excuse! but a beggarly saucy dirty *ervant0.aid. 4et you out of my (ouse! you #hore:. %o which! she added another /ame! which we do not care to stain our "aper with. <It was a monosyllable! beginning with a 1<! and indeed was the same! as if she had pronounced the #ords! 'he )og. #hich %erm! we shall! to avoid ,ffence! use on this ,ccasion. %etty had borne all hitherto with "atience! and had uttered only $amentations- but the last Appellation stung her to the >uic ! :I am a #oman as well as yourself!: she roared out! :and no *he0&og= And if I have been a little naughty! I am not the first; if I have been no better than I should be!: cries she sobbing! :that+s no Reason you should call me out of my /ame.: :(u55y! hu55y!: says .rs. (ow,wouse, :have you the Impudence to answer me= &id I not catch you! you saucy<: and then again repeated the terrible word so odious to )emale Ears. :I can+t bear that /ame!: answered %etty, :if I have been wic ed! I am to answer for it myself in the other #orld! but I have done nothing that+s unnatural! and I will go out of your (ouse this .oment- for I will never be called 'he )og, by any .istress in &ngland.: .rs. (ow,wouse then armed herself with the *pit- but was prevented from executing any dreadful "urpose by .r. Adams, who confined her Arms with the *trength of a #rist! which 1ercules would not have been ashamed of. .r. (ow,wouse being caught! as our $awyers express it! with the .anner! and having no &efence to ma e! very prudently withdrew himself! and %etty committed herself to the "rotection of the (ostler! who! though he was not pleased with what had happened! was in her ,pinion rather a gentler 1east than her .istress. .rs. (ow,wouse, at the Intercession of .r. Adams, and finding the Enemy vanished! began to compose herself #e will therefore leave her in this %emper! to open to the Reader the *teps which led to a 'atastrophe! common enough! and comical enough too! perhaps in modern (istory! yet often fatal to the Repose and #ell0being of )amilies! and the *ub7ect of many %ragedies! both in $ife and on the *tage. '(A". CVII. (he 1istory of %etty the Chambermaid, and an Account of what occasioned the violent 'cene in the preceding Chapter. 1etty! who was the ,ccasion of all this (urry! had some good >ualities. *he had 4ood0nature! 4enerosity and 'ompassion! but unhappily her 'onstitution was composed of those warm Ingredients! which! though the "urity of 'ourts or /unneries might have happily controuled! were by no means able to endure the tic lish *ituation of a 'hamber0maid at an Inn! who is daily liable to the *olicitations of $overs of all 'omplexions! to the dangerous Addresses of fine 4entlemen of the Army! who sometimes are obliged to reside with them a whole Aear together! and above all are exposed to the 'aresses of )ootmen! *tage0'oachmen! &rawers! and others! all of which employ the whole Artillery of issing! flattering! bribing! and every other #eapon which is to be found in the whole Armory of $ove! against them. 1etty! who was about one and twenty! had now lived three Aears in this dangerous *ituation! during which she had escaped pretty well. An Ensign of )oot was the first "erson who made any Impression on her (eart; he did indeed raise a )lame in her! which required the 'are of a *urgeon to cool. #hile she burnt for him! several others burnt for her. ,fficers of the Army! young 4entlemen travelling the #estern 'ircuit! inoffensive *quires! and some of graver 'haracter were set afire by her 'harmsB At length! having perfectly recovered the Effects of her first unhappy "assion! she seemed to have vowed a *tate of perpetual 'hastity. *he was long deaf to all the *ufferings of her $overs! till one day at a neighbouring )air! the Rhetoric of !ohn the (ostler! with a new *traw (at! and a "int of #ine! made a second 'onquest over her. *he did not however feel any of those )lames on this ,ccasion! which had been the 'onsequence of her former Amour; nor indeed those other ill Effects! which prudent young #omen very 7ustly apprehend from too absolute an Indulgence to the pressing Endearments of their $overs. %his latter! perhaps! was a little owing to her not being entirely constant to !ohn, with whom she permitted (om Whipwell the *tage0 'oachman! and now and then a handsome young %raveller! to share her )avours. .r. (ow,wouse had for some time cast the languishing Eyes of Affection on this young .aiden. (e had laid hold on every ,pportunity of saying tender things to her! squee5ing her by the (and! and sometimes of issing her $ips- for as the Violence of his "assion had considerably abated to .rs. (ow,wouse; so li e

#ater! which it stopt from its usual 'urrent in one "lace! it naturally sought a vent in another. .rs. (ow, wouse is thought to have perceived this Abatement! and probably it added very little to the natural *weetness of her %emper- for tho+ she was as true to her (usband! as the &ial to the *un! she was rather more desirous of being shone on! as being more capable of feeling his #armth. Ever since !oseph*s arrival! %etty had conceived an extraordinary $i ing to him! which discovered itself more and more! as he grew better and better; till that fatal Evening! when she was warming his 1ed! her "assion grew to such a (eight! and so perfectly mastered both her .odesty and her Reason! that after many fruitless (ints! and sly Insinuations! she at last threw down the #arming0"an! and embracing him with great Eagerness! swore he was the handsomest 'reature she had ever seen. ?oseph in great 'onfusion leapt from her! and told her! he was sorry to see a young #oman cast off all Regard to .odesty- but she had gone too far to recede! and grew so very indecent! that !oseph was obliged! contrary to his Inclination! to use some Violence to her! and ta ing her in his Arms! he shut her out of the Room! and loc ed the &oor. (ow ought .an to re7oice! that his 'hastity is always in his own power! that if he hath sufficient *trength of .ind! he hath always a competent *trength of 1ody to defend himself- and cannot! li e a poor wea #oman! be ravished against his #ill. 1etty was in the most violent Agitation at this &isappointment. Rage and $ust pulled her (eart! as with two *trings! two different #ays; one .oment she thought of stabbing !oseph, the next! of ta ing him in her Arms! and devouring him with 2isses; but the latter "assion was far more prevalent. %hen she thought of revenging his Refusal on herself- but whilst she was engaged in this .editation! happily &eath presented himself to her in so many *hapes of drowning! hanging! poisoning! Ec. that her distracted .ind could resolve on none. In this "erturbation of *pirit! it accidentally occurred to her .emory! that her .aster+s 1ed was not made! she therefore went directly to his Room; where he happened at that time to be engaged at his 1ureau. As soon as she saw him! she attempted to retire- but he called her bac ! and ta ing her by the hand! squee5ed it so tenderly! at the same time whispering so many soft things into her Ears! and! then pressed her so closely with his 2isses! that the vanquished )air0,ne! whose "assions were already raised! and which were not so whimsically capricious that one .an only could lay them! though perhaps! she would have rather preferred that one- %he vanquished )air0,ne quietly submitted! I say! to her .aster+s #ill! who had 7ust attained the Accomplishment of his 1liss! when .rs. (ow,wouse unexpectedly entered the Room! and caused all that 'onfusion which we have before seen! and which it is not necessary at present to ta e any farther /otice of. As every Reader of any *peculation! or Experience! though not married himself! may easily con7ecture! that it concluded with the &ischarge of %etty, the *ubmission of .r. (ow,worse, with some things to be performed on his side by way of 4ratitude for his #ife+s 4oodness in being reconciled to him! with many hearty "romises never to offend any more in the li e manner- and lastly! his quietly and contentedly bearing to be reminded of his %ransgressions! as a ind of "enance! once or twice a &ay! during the Residue of his $ife. (he &nd of the -irst %oo". BOO* II. '(A". I. Of )ivisions in Authors. %here are certain .ysteries or *ecrets in all %rades from the highest to the lowest! from that of Prime $inistring to this of Authoring, which are seldom discovered! unless to .embers of the same 'alling. Among those used by us 4entlemen of the latter ,ccupation! I ta e this of dividing our #or s into 1oo s and 'hapters to be none of the least considerable. /ow for want of being truly acquainted with this *ecret! common Readers imagine! that by this Art of dividing! we mean only to swell our #or s to a much larger 1ul than they would otherwise be extended to. %hese several "laces therefore in our "aper! which are filled

with our 1oo s and 'hapters! are understood as so much 1uc ram! *tays! and *tay0tape in a %aylor+s 1ill! serving only to ma e up the *um %otal! commonly found at the 1ottom of our first "age! and of his last. 1ut in reality the 'ase is otherwise! and in this! as well as all other Instances! we consult the Advantage of our Reader! and not our own; and indeed many notable @ses arise to him from this .ethod- for first! those little *paces between our 'hapters may be loo ed upon as an Inn or Resting0"lace! where he may stop and ta e a 4lass! or any other Refreshment! as it pleases him. /ay! our fine Readers will! perhaps! be scarce able to travel farther than through one of them in a &ay. As to those vacant "ages which are placed between our 1oo s! they are to be regarded as those *tages! where! in long ?ourneys! the %raveller stays some time to repose himself! and consider of what he hath seen in the "arts he hath already past through; a 'onsideration which I ta e the $iberty to recommend a little to the Reader- for however swift his 'apacity may be! I would not advise him to travel through these "ages too fast- for if he doth! he may probably miss the seeing some curious "roductions of /ature which will be observed by the slower and more accurate Reader. A Volume without any such "laces of Rest resembles the ,pening of #ilds or *eas! which tires the Eye and fatigues the *pirit when entered upon. *econdly! #hat are the 'ontents prefixed to every 'hapter! but so many Inscriptions over the 4ates of Inns 8to continue the same .etaphor!9 informing the Reader what Entertainment he is to expect! which if he li es not! he may travel on to the next- for in 1iography! as we are not tied down to an exact 'oncatenation equally with other (istorians; so a 'hapter or two 8for Instance this I am now writing9 may be often pass+d over without any In7ury to the #hole. And in these Inscriptions I have been as faithful as possible! not imitating the celebrated $ontagne, who promises you one thing and gives you another; nor some %itle0"age Authors! who promise a great deal! and produce nothing at all. %here are! besides these more obvious 1enefits! several others which our Readers en7oy from this Art of dividing; tho+ perhaps most of them too mysterious to be presently understood! by any who are not initiated into the *cience of Authoring. %hese have the *anction of great Antiquity. 1omer not only divided his great #or into twenty0four 1oo s! 8in 'ompliment perhaps to the twenty0four $etters to which he had very particular ,bligations9 but haw ed them all separately! delivering only one 1oo at a %ime! 8probably by *ubscription9. (e was the first Inventor of the Art which so long lay dormant! of publishing by /umbers! an Art now brought to such "erfection! that even &ictionaries are divided and exhibited piece0meal to the "ublic; nay! one 1oo seller hath 8to encourage Learning and ease the Public 9 contrived to give them a &ictionary in this divided .anner for only fifteen *hillings more than it would have cost entire. Virgil hath given us his "oem in twelve 1oo s! an Argument of his .odesty; for by that doubtless he would insinuate that he pretends to no more than half the .erit of the #ree"- for the same Reason! our $ilton went originally no farther than ten; +till being puffed up by the "raise of his )riends! he put himself on the same footing with the 7oman "oet. I *hall not however enter so deep into this .atter as some very learned 'ritic s have done; who have with infinite $abour and acute &iscernment discovered what 1oo s are proper for Embellishment! and what require *implicity only! particularly with regard to *imilies! which I thin are now generally agreed to become any 1oo but the first. I will dismiss this 'hapter with the following ,bservation- %hat it becomes an Author generally to divide a 1oo ! as it doth a 1utcher to 7oint his .eat! for such Assistance is of great (elp to both the Reader and the 'arver. And now having indulged myself a little! I will endeavour to indulge the 'uriosity of my Reader! who is no doubt impatient to now what he will find in the subsequent 'hapters of this 1oo . '(A". II. A surpri2ing .nstance of $r. Adams*s short $emory, with the unfortunate ConseBuences which it brought on !oseph. .r. Adams and !oseph were now ready to depart! when an Accident determined the former to return! which (ow,wouse, %arnabas, and the 1oo seller had not been able to do. %his Accident was no other than the forgetting to put up the *ermons! which were indeed left behind; what he had mista en for them in the *addle01ags being no other than three *hirts! a pair of *hoes! and some other /ecessaries! which .rs.

Adams, who thought her (usband would want *hirts more than *ermons on his ?ourney! had carefully provided him. %he 1ill was now called for! and on Examination! amounted within a *hilling to the *um which .r. Adams had in his "oc et. "erhaps the Reader may wonder how he was able to produce a sufficient *um for so many &ays- that he may not be too much surpri5ed! therefore! it cannot be unnecessary to acquaint him! that he had borrowed a 4uinea of a *ervant belonging to the 'oach and *ix! who had been formerly one of his "arishioners! and whose .aster! the ,wner of the 'oach! then lived within three .iles of him- for so good was the 'redit of .r. Adams, that even .r. Peter the $ady %ooby*s *teward! would have lent him a 4uinea with very little *ecurity. .r. Adams discharged the 1ill! and they were both setting out! having agreed to ride and tie- a .ethod of %ravelling much used by two "ersons who have but one (orse between them! and is thus performed. %he two %ravellers set out together! one on horsebac ! the other on foot- /ow as it generally happens that he on horsebac out0goes him on foot! the 'ustom is! that when he arrives at the &istance agreed on! he is to dismount! tie the (orse to some 4ate! %ree! "ost! or other thing! and then proceed on foot; when the other comes up to the (orse! he unties him! mounts and gallops on! +till having passed by his )ellow0%raveller! he li ewise arrives at the "lace of tying. And this is that .ethod of %ravelling so much in use among our prudent Ancestors! who new that (orses had .ouths as well as $egs! and that they could not use the latter! without being at the Expence of suffering the 1easts themselves to use the former. %his was the .ethod in use in those &ays- when! instead of a 'oach and *ix! a .ember of "arliament+s $ady used to mount a "illion behind her (usband; and a grave *er7eant at $aw condescended to amble to Westminster on an easy "ad! with his 'ler ic ing his (eels behind him. Adams was now gone some .inutes! having insisted on !oseph*s beginning the ?ourney on horsebac ! and !oseph had his )oot in the *tirrup! when the (ostler presented him a 1ill for the (orse+s 1oard during his Residence at the Inn. !oseph said .r. Adams had paid all; but this .atter being referred to .r. (ow,wouse was by him decided in favour of the (ostler! and indeed with %ruth and ?ustice- for this was a fresh Instance of that shortness of .emory which did not arise from want of "arts! but that continual (urry in which "arson Adams was always involved. ?oseph was now reduced to a &ilemma which extremely pu55led him. %he *um due for (orse0meat was twelve *hillings! 8for Adams who had borrowed the 1east! had ordered him to be fed as well as they could feed him9 and the 'ash in his "oc et amounted to *ixpence! 8for Adams had divided the last *hilling with him9. /ow! tho+ there have been some ingenious "ersons who have contrived to pay twelve *hillings with *ixpence! !oseph was not one of them. (e had never contracted a &ebt in his $ife! and was consequently the less ready at an Expedient to extricate himself. (ow,wouse would probably have been willing to give him 'redit +till next time! had not !oseph, when he honestly discovered the /a edness of his "oc ets! pulled out that little "iece of 4old which we have mentioned before. %his caused .r. (ow,wouse*s Eyes to water! and he told !oseph, he did not conceive a .an could want .oney whilst he had 4old in his "oc et. !oseph answered! he had such a Value for that little "iece of 4old! that he would not part with it for a hundred times the Riches which the greatest Esquire in the 'ounty was worth. A pretty #ay indeed! said .r. (ow,wouse to run in debt! and then refuse to part with your .oney! because you have a Value for it. I never new any "iece of 4old of more Value than as many *hillings as it would change for. /ot to preserve my $ife from starving! nor to redeem it from a Robber! would I part with this dear "iece! answered !oseph. %hen I cannot part with the (orse! replied (ow,wouse. A Resolution highly commended by a $awyer then in the Aard! who declared .r. (ow,wouse might 7ustify the &etainer. As we cannot therefore at present get .r. !oseph out of the Inn! we shall leave him in it! and carry our Reader on after "arson Adams, who! his .ind being perfectly at ease! fell into a 'ontemplation on a "assage in Cschylus, which entertained him for three .iles together! without suffering him once to reflect on his )ellow0%raveller. At length having spun out this %hread! and being now at the *ummit of a (ill! he cast his Eyes bac wards! and wondered that he could not see any sign of !oseph. As he left him ready to mount the (orse! he could not apprehend any .ischief had happened! neither could he suspect that he had miss+d his #ay! it being so broad

and plain- the only Reason which presented itself to him! was that he had met with an Acquaintance who had prevailed with him to delay some time in &iscourse. (e therefore resolved to proceed slowly forwards! not doubting but that he should be shortly overta en! and soon came to a large #ater! which filling the whole Road! he saw no .ethod of passing unless by wading through! which he accordingly did up to his .iddle; but was no sooner got to the other *ide! than he perceived! if he had loo ed over the (edge! he would have found a )oot0"ath capable of conducting him without wetting his *hoes. (is *urpri5e at !oseph*s not coming up grew now very troublesome- he began to fear he new not what! and as he determined! to move no farther; and! if he did not shortly overta e him! to return bac ; he wished to find a (ouse of public Entertainment where he might have dried his 'lothes and refresh himself with a "intbut seeing no such 8for no other Reason than because he did not cast his Eyes a hundred Aards forwards9 he sat himself down on a *tile! and pulled out his Cschylus. A )ellow passing presently by! Adams as ed him! if he could direct him to an Alehouse. %he )ellow who had 7ust left it! and perceived the (ouse and *ign to be within sight! thin ing he had 7eered him! and being of a morose %emper! bid him follow his ose and be d;n*d. Adams told him he was a saucy !ac"anapes ; upon which the )ellow turned about angrily- but perceiving Adams clench his )ist he thought proper to go on without ta ing any farther notice. A (orseman following immediately after! and being as ed the same >uestion! answered! )riend! there is one within a *tone+s0%hrow; I believe you may see it before you. Adams lifting up his Eyes! cry+d! I protest and so there is; and than ing his Informer proceeded directly to it. '(A". III. (he Opinion of two Lawyers concerning the same #entleman, with $r. Adams*s &nBuiry into the 7eligion of his 1ost. (e had 7ust entered the (ouse! had called for his "int and seated himself! when two (orsemen came to the &oor! and fastening their (orses to the Rails! alighted. %hey said there was a violent *hower of Rain coming on! which they intended to weather there! and went into a little Room by themselves! not perceiving .r. Adams. ,ne of these immediately as ed the other! if he had seen a more comical Adventure a great while= @pon which the other said! :he doubted whether by $aw! the $andlord could 7ustify detaining the (orse for his 'orn and (ay.: 1ut the first answered! :undoubtedly he can- it is an ad7udged 'ase! and I have nown it tried.: Adams! who tho+ he was! as the Reader may suspect! a little inclined to )orgetfulness! never wanted more than a (int to remind him! over0hearing their &iscourse! immediately suggested to himself that this was his own (orse! and that he had forgot to pay for him! which upon enquiry! he was certified of by the 4entlemen; who added! that the (orse was li ely to have more Rest than )ood! unless he was paid for. %he poor "arson resolved to return presently to the Inn! tho+ he new no more than !oseph, how to procure his (orse his $iberty- he was however prevailed on to stay under 'overt! +till the *hower which was now very violent! was over. %he three %ravellers now sat down together over a .ug of good 1eer; when Adams, who had observed a 4entleman+s (orse as he passed along the Road! enquired to whom it belonged- one of the (orsemen had no sooner mentioned the ,wner+s /ame! than the other began to revile him in the most opprobrious %erms. %he &nglish $anguage scarce affords a single reproachful #ord! which he did not vent on this ,ccasion. (e charged him li ewise with many particular )acts. (e said!<:he no more regarded a )ield of #heat when he was hunting! than he did the (igh0way; that he had in7ured several poor )armers by trampling their 'orn under his (orse+s (eels; and if any of them begged him with the utmost *ubmission to refrain! his (orse0 whip was always ready to do them 7ustice.: (e said! :that he was the greatest %yrant to the /eighbours in every other Instance! and would not suffer a )armer to eep a 4un! tho+ he might 7ustify it by $aw; and in his own )amily so cruel a .aster! that he never ept a *ervant a %welve0month. In his 'apacity as a ?ustice!: continued he! :he behaves so partially! that he commits or acquits 7ust as he is in the humour! without any

regard to %ruth or Evidence- %he &evil may carry any one before him for me; I would rather be tried before some ?udges than be a "rosecutor before him- If I had an Estate in the /eighbourhood! I would sell it for half the Value! rather than live near him.: Adams shoo his (ead! and said! :he was sorry such .en were suffered to proceed with Impunity! and that Riches could set any .an above $aw.: %he Reviler a little after retiring into the Aard! the 4entleman! who had first mentioned his /ame to Adams, began to assure him! :that his 'ompanion was a pre7udiced "erson. It is true!: says he! :perhaps! that he may have sometimes pursued his 4ame over a )ield of 'orn! but he hath always made the "arty ample *atisfaction; that so far from tyranni5ing over his /eighbours! or ta ing away their 4uns! he himself new several )armers not qualified! who not only ept 4uns! but illed 4ame with them. %hat he was the best of .asters to his *ervants! and several of them had grown old in his *ervice. %hat he was the best ?ustice of "eace in the 2ingdom! and to his certain nowledge had decided many difficult "oints! which were referred to him! with the greatest Equity! and the highest #isdom. And he verily believed! several "ersons would give a Aear+s "urchase more for an Estate near him! than under the #ings of any other great .an.: (e had 7ust finished his Encomium! when his 'ompanion returned and acquainted him the *torm was over. @pon which! they presently mounted their (orses and departed. Adams, who was in the utmost Anxiety at those different 'haracters of the same "erson! as ed his (ost if he new the 4entleman- for he began to imagine they had by mista e been spea ing of two several 4entlemen.: :/o! no! .asterB: answered the (ost! a shrewd cunning )ellow! :I now the 4entleman very well of whom they have been spea ing! as I do the 4entleman who spo e of him. As for riding over other .en+s 'orn! to my nowledge he hath not been on horsebac these two Aears. I never heard he did any In7ury of that ind; and as to ma ing Reparation! he is not so free of his .oney as that comes to neither. /or did I ever hear of his ta ing away any .an+s 4un; nay! I now several who have 4uns in their (ouses- but as for illing 4ame with them! no .an is stricter; and I believe he would ruin any who did. Aou heard one of the 4entlemen say! he was the worst .aster in the #orld! and the other that he is the best- but as for my own part! I now all his *ervants! and never heard from any of them that he was either one or the other.<: :Aye! aye!: says Adams, :and how doth he behave as a ?ustice! pray=: :)aith! )riend!: answered the (ost! :I question whether he is in the 'ommission- the only 'ause I have heard he hath decided a great while! was one between those very two "ersons who 7ust went out of this (ouse; and I am sure he determined that 7ustly! for I heard the whole matter.: :#hich did he decide it in favour of!: quoth Adams = :I thin I need not answer that >uestion!: cried the (ost! :after the different 'haracters you have heard of him. It is not my 1usiness to contradict 4entlemen! while they are drin ing in my (ouse- but I new neither of them spo e a *yllable of %ruth.: :4od forbidB: 8said Adams,9 :that .en should arrive at such a "itch of #ic edness! to be0lye the 'haracter of their /eighbour from a little private Affection! or what is infinitely worse! a private *pite. I rather believe we have mista en them! and they mean two other "ersons- for there are many (ouses on the Road.: :#hy prithee! )riend!: cries the (ost! :dost thou pretend never to have told a lye in thy $ife=: :/ever a malicious one! I am certain!: answered Adams; :nor with a &esign to in7ure the Reputation of any .an living.: :"ugh! maliciousB no! no!: replied the (ost; :not malicious with a &esign to hang a .an! or bring him into %roublebut surely out of love to one+s self! one must spea better of a )riend than an Enemy.: :,ut of love to your self! you should confine yourself to %ruth!: says Adams, :for by doing otherwise! you in7ure the noblest "art of yourself! your immortal *oul. I can hardly believe any .an such an Idiot to risque the $oss of that by any trifling 4ain! and the greatest 4ain in this #orld is but &irt in comparison of what shall be revealed hereafter.: @pon which the (ost ta ing up the 'up! with a *mile dran a (ealth to (ereafter- adding! :he was for something present.: :#hy!: says Adams very gravely! :&o not you believe another #orld=: %o which the (ost answered! :yes! he was no Atheist.: :And you believe you have an immortal *oul!: cries Adams- (e answered! +4od forbid he should not.: :And (eaven and (ell=: said the "arson. %he (ost then bid him :not to prophane- for those were %hings not to be mentioned nor thought of but in 'hurch.: Adams as ed him! :why he went to 'hurch! if what he learned there had no Influence on his 'onduct in $ife=: :I go to 'hurch!: answered the (ost! :to say my "rayers and behave godly.: :And dost not thou!: cry+d Adams, :believe what thou hearest at 'hurch=: :.ost part of it! .aster!: returned the (ost. :And dost not thou then tremble!: cries Adams, :at the %hought of eternal "unishment=: :As for that! .aster!: said he! :I never once thought about it- but what signifies tal ing about matters so far off= the .ug is out! shall I draw another=

#hilst he was gone for that purpose! a *tage0'oach drove up to the &oor. %he 'oachman coming into the (ouse! was as ed by the .istress! whom he had in his 'oach= A "arcel of 'Buinny,gut 1<s! 8says he9 I have a good mind to overturn them; you won+t prevail upon them to drin any thing I assure you. Adams as ed him! if he had not seen a young .an on (orse0bac on the Road! 8describing !oseph 9. Aye! said the 'oachman! a 4entlewoman in my 'oach that is his Acquaintance redeemed him and his (orse; he would have been here before this time! had not the *torm driven him to shelter. 4od bless her! said Adams in a Rapture; nor could he delay wal ing out to satisfy himself who this charitable #oman was; but what was his surpri5e! when he saw his old Acquaintance! .adam 'lipslop= (er+s indeed was not so great! because she had been informed by !oseph, that he was on the Road. Very civil were the *alutations on both sides; and .rs. 'lipslop rebu ed the (ostess for denying the 4entleman to be there when she as ed for him- but indeed the poor #oman had not erred designedly; for .rs. 'lipslop as ed for a 'lergyman; and she had unhappily mista en him for a "erson travelling to a neighbouring )air with the %himble and 1utton! or some other such ,peration- for he marched in a swinging great white 'oat with blac 1uttons! a short #ig! and a (at! which so far from having a blac (atband! had nothing blac about it. ?oseph was now come up! and .rs. 'lipslop would have had him quit his (orse to the "arson! and come himself into the 'oach- but he absolutely refused! saying he than ed (eaven he was well enough recovered to be very able to ride! and added! he hoped he new his &uty better than to ride in a 'oach while .r. Adams was on horsebac . .rs. 'lipslop would have persisted longer! had not a $ady in the 'oach put a short End to the &ispute! by refusing to suffer a )ellow in a $ivery to ride in the same 'oach with herself- so it was at length agreed that Adams should fill the vacant "lace in the 'oach! and !oseph should proceed on horsebac . %hey had not proceeded far before .rs. 'lipslop, addressing herself to the "arson! spo e thus- :%here hath been a strange Alteration in our )amily! .r. Adams, since *ir !ohn*s &eath.: :A strange Alteration indeedB: says Adams, :as I gather from some (ints which have dropped from !oseph.: :Aye!: says she! :I could never have believed it! but the longer one lives in the #orld! the more one sees. *o !oseph hath given you (ints.: <:1ut of what /ature! will always remain a perfect *ecret with me!: cries the "arson; :he forced me to promise before he would communicate any thing. :%hey are no *ecrets to me! I assure you!: cries 'lipslop; :and I believe! they will none any where shortly- for ever since his &eparture she hath behaved more li e a mad #oman than any thing else.: :%ruly! I am heartily concerned!: says Adams, :for she was a good sort of a $ady; indeed I have often wished she had attended a little more constantly at the *ervice! but she hath done a great deal of 4ood in the "arish.: :, .r. AdamsB: says 'lipslop, :"eople that don+t see all! often now nothing. :.any %hings have been given away in our )amily! I do assure you! without her nowledge. I have heard you say in the "ulpit! we ought not to brag- but indeed I can+t avoid saying! if she had ept the 2eys herself! the "oor would have wanted many a 'ordial which I have let them have. As for my late .aster! he was as worthy a .an as ever lived! and would have done infinite 4ood if he had not been controlled- but he loved a quiet $ife! (eavens rest his *oulB I am confident he is there! and en7oys a quiet $ife! which some )ol s would not allow him here.: Adams answered! :he had never heard this before! and was mista en! if she herself!: 8for he remembered she used to commend her .aster and blame her .istress!9 :had not formerly been of another ,pinion.: :I don+t now!: 8replied she!9 :what I might once thin - but now I am confidous .atters are as I tell you- %he #orld will shortly see who hath been deceived; for my part I say nothing! but that it is wondersome how some "eople can carry all things with a grave )ace.: %hus .r. Adams and she discoursed- +till they came opposite to a great (ouse which stood at some distance from the Road; a $ady in the 'oach spying it! cry+d yonder lives the unfortunate Leonora, if one can call a #oman 7ustly unfortunate! whom we must own at the same time guilty! and the Author of her own 'alamity. %his was abundantly sufficient to awa en the 'uriosity of .r. Adams, as indeed it did that of the whole 'ompany! who 7ointly solicited the $ady to acquaint them with Leonora*s (istory! since it seemed! by what she had said! to contain something remar able. %he $ady! who was perfectly well bred! did not require many Entreaties! and having only wished this Entertainment might ma e amends for the 'ompany+s Attention! she began in the following manner.

'(A". IV. (he 1istory of Leonora, or the Dnfortunate !ilt. Leonora was the &aughter of a 4entleman of )ortune; she was tall and well0shaped! with a *prightliness in her 'ountenance! which often attracts beyond the more regular )eatures 7oined with an insipid Air; nor is this ind of 1eauty less apt to deceive than allure the 4ood0(umour which it indicates! being often mista en for 4ood0/ature! and the Vivacity for true @nderstanding. $eonora was now at the Age of Eighteen! lived with an Aunt of her+s in a %own in the /orth of &ngland. *he was an extreme $over of 4aiety! and very rarely missed a 1all or any other public Assembly; where she had frequent ,pportunities of satisfying a greedy Appetite of Vanity with the "reference which was given her by the .en to almost every other #oman present. Among many young )ellows who were particular in their 4allantries towards her! 1oratio soon distinguished himself in her Eyes beyond all his 'ompetitors; she danced with more than ordinary 4aiety when he happened to be her "artner; neither the )airness of the Evening nor the .usic of the /ightingale! could lengthen her #al li e his 'ompany. *he affected no longer to understand the 'ivilities of otherswhilst she inclined so attentive an Ear to every 'ompliment of 1oratio, that she often smiled even when it was too delicate for her 'omprehension. :"ray! .adam!: says Adams, :who was this *quire 1oratio =: (oratio! says the $ady! was a young 4entleman of a good )amily! bred to the $aw! and had been some few Aears called to the &egree of a 1arrister. (is )ace and "erson were such as the 4enerality allowed handsome- but he had a &ignity in his Air very rarely to be seen. (is %emper was of the saturnine 'omplexion! but without the least %aint of .oroseness. (e had #it and (umour with an Inclination to *atire! which he indulged rather too much. %his 4entleman! who had contracted the most violent "assion for Leonora, was the last "erson who perceived the "robability of its *uccess. %he whole %own had made the .atch for him! before he himself had drawn a 'onfidence from her Actions sufficient to mention his "assion to her; for it was his ,pinion! 8and perhaps he was there in the right9 that it is highly impolitic to tal seriously of $ove to a #oman before you have made such a "rogress in her Affections! that she herself expects and desires to hear it. 1ut whatever &iffidence the )ears of a $over may create! which are apt to magnify every )avour conferred on a Rival! and to see the little Advances towards themselves through the other End of the "erspective; it was impossible that 1oratio*s "assion should so blind his &iscernment! as to prevent his conceiving (opes from the 1ehaviour of Leonora; whose )ondness for him was now as visible to an indifferent "erson in their 'ompany! as his for her. :I /ever new any of these forward *luts come to good!: 8says the $ady! who refused !oseph*s Entrance into the 'oach!9 :nor shall I wonder at any thing she doth in the *equel.: %he $ady proceeded in her *tory thus- It was in the .idst of a gay 'onversation in the #al s one Evening! when 1oratio whispered Leonora, :that he was desirous to ta e a %urn or two with her in private; for that he had something to communicate to her of great 'onsequence.: :Are you sure it is of 'onsequence=: said she! smiling. <:I hope!: answered he! :you will thin so too! since the whole future (appiness of my $ife must depend on the Event.: $eonora! who very much suspected what was coming! would have deferred it +till another %ime- but 1oratio, who had more than half conquered the &ifficulty of spea ing by the first .otion! was so very importunate! that she at last yielded! and leaving the rest of the 'ompany! they turned aside into an unfrequented #al . %hey had retired far out of the sight of the 'ompany! both maintaining a strict *ilence. At last 1oratio made a full *top! and ta ing Leonora, who stood pale and trembling! gently by the (and! he fetched a deep *igh! and then loo ing on her Eyes with all the %enderness imaginable! he cried out in a faltering Accent; :, LeonoraB it is necessary for me to declare to you on what the future (appiness of my $ife must be foundedB .ust I say! there is something belonging to you which is a 1ar to my (appiness! and which unless you will part with! I must be miserable=: :#hat can that be!: replied Leonora= <:/o wonder!: said he! :you are surpri5ed! that I should ma e an ,b7ection to any thing which is yours! yet sure you may guess! since it is the only one which the Riches of the #orld! if they were mine! should purchase of me. <, it is that which you

must part with! to bestow all the restB 'an Leonora, or rather will she doubt longer= <$et me then whisper it in her Ears! It is your /ame! .adam. It is by parting with that! by your 'ondescension to be for ever mine! which must at once prevent me from being the most miserable! and will render me the happiest of .an ind.: Leonora, covered with 1lushes! and with as angry a $oo as she could possibly put on! told him! that had she suspected what his &eclaration would have been! he should not have decoyed her from her 'ompany; that he had so surpri5ed and frighted her! that she begged him to convey her bac as quic as possible;: which he! trembling very near as much as herself! did. :.ore )ool he!: cried 'lipslop, :it is a sign he new very little of our 'ect.: :%ruly! .adam!: said Adams, :I thin you are in the right! I should have insisted to now a piece of her .ind! when I had carried matters so far.: 1ut .rs. #rave,airs desired the $ady to omit all such fulsome *tuff in her *tory- for that it made her sic . #ell then! .adam! to be as concise as possible! said the $ady! many #ee s had not past after this Interview! before 1oratio and Leonora were what they call on a good footing together. All 'eremonies except the last were now over; the #ritings were now drawn! and every thing was in the utmost forwardness preparative to the putting 1oratio in possession of all his #ishes. I will if you please repeat you a $etter from each of them which I have got by heart! and which will give you no small Idea of their "assion on both sides. .rs. #rave,airs ob7ected to hearing these $etters- but being put to the Vote! it was carried against her by all the rest in the 'oach; "arson Adams contending for it with the utmost Vehemence. 1oratio to Leonora. (ow vain! most adorable 'reature! is the "ursuit of "leasure in the absence of an ,b7ect to which the .ind is entirely devoted! unless it have some Relation to that ,b7ectB I was last /ight! condemned to the *ociety of .en of #it and $earning! which! however agreeable! it might have formerly been to me! now only gave me a *uspicion that they imputed my Absence in 'onversation to the true 'ause. )or which Reason! when your Engagements forbid me the extatic (appiness of seeing you! I am always desirous to be alone; since my *entiments for Leonora are so delicate! that I cannot bear the Apprehension of another+s prying into those delightful Endearments with which the warm Imagination of a $over will sometimes indulge him! and which I suspect my Eyes then betray. %o fear this &iscovery of our %houghts! may perhaps appear too ridiculous a /icety to .inds! not susceptible of all the %endernesses of a "assion which requires every human Virtue to exert itself in its full Extent. *ince the 1eloved whose (appiness it ultimately respects! may give us charming ,pportunities of being brave in her &efence! generous to her #ants! compassionate to her Afflictions! grateful to her 2indness! and! in the same manner! of exercising every other Virtue! which he who would not do to any &egree! and that with the utmost Rapture! can never deserve the /ame of a $over- It is therefore with a View to the delicate .odesty of your .ind that I cultivate it so purely in my own! and it is that which will sufficiently suggest to you the @neasiness I bear from those $iberties which .en to whom the #orld allow "oliteness will sometimes give themselves on these ,ccasions. 'an I tell you with what Eagerness I expect the Arrival of that blest &ay! when I shall experience the )alshood of a common Assertion that the greatest human (appiness consists in (ope= A &octrine which no "erson had ever stronger Reason to believe than myself at present! since none ever tasted such 1liss as fires my 1osom with the %houghts of spending my future &ays with such a 'ompanion! and that every Action of my $ife will have the glorious *atisfaction of conducing to your (appiness. Leonora to 1oratio. %he Refinement of your .ind has been so evidently proved! by every #ord and Action ever since I had first the "leasure of nowing you! that I thought it impossible my good ,pinion of 1oratio could have been heightened by any additional "roof of .erit. %his very %hought was my Amusement when I received your last $etter! which! when I opened! I confess I was surpri5ed to find the delicate *entiments expressed there! so far exceeded what I thought could come even from you! 8altho+ I now all the generous "rinciples human /ature is capable of! are centered in your 1reast9 that #ords cannot paint what I feel on the Reflection! that my (appiness shall be the ultimate End of all your Actions. ,h 1oratioB what a $ife must that be! where the meanest domestic 'ares are sweetened by the pleasing 'onsideration that the .an on Earth who best deserves! and to whom you are most inclined to give your Affections! is to reap either "rofit or "leasure from all you doB In such a 'ase! %oils must be turned into

&iversions! and nothing but the unavoidable Inconveniences of $ife can ma e us remember that we are mortal. If the solitary %urn of your %houghts! and the &esire of eeping them undiscovered! ma es even the 'onversation of .en of #it and $earning tedious to you! what anxious (ours must I spend who am condemn+d by 'ustom to the 'onversation of #omen! whose natural 'uriosity leads them to pry into all my %houghts! and whose Envy can never suffer 1oratio*s (eart to be possessed by any one without forcing them into malicious &esigns! against the "erson who is so happy as to possess it- but indeed! if ever Envy can possible have any Excuse! or even Alleviation! it is in this 'ase! where the 4ood is so great! that it must be equally natural to all to wish it for themselves! nor am I ashamed to own it- and to your .erit! 1oratio, I am obliged! that prevents my being in that most uneasy of all the *ituations. I can figure in my Imagination of being led by Inclination to love the "erson whom my own ?udgment forces me to condemn. .atters were in so great forwardness between this fond 'ouple! that the &ay was fixed for their .arriage! and was now within a )ortnight! when the *essions chanced to be held for that 'ounty in a %own about twenty .iles distance from that which is the *cene of our *tory. It seems! it is usual for the young 4entlemen of the 1ar to repair to these *essions! not so much for the sa e of "rofit! as to shew their "arts and learn the $aw of the ?ustices of "eace- for which purpose one of the wisest and gravest of all the ?ustices is appointed *pea er or 'hairman! as they modestly call it! and he reads them a $ecture! and instructs them in the true 2nowledge of the $aw. :Aou are her guilty of a little .ista e! says Adams, which if you please I will correct; I have attended at one of these >uarter *essions! where I observed the 'ounsel taught the ?ustices! instead of learning any thing of them:. It is not very material! said the $ady- hither repaired 1oratio, who as he hoped by his "rofession to advance his )ortune! which was not at present very large! for the sa e of his dear Leonora, he resolved to spare no "ains! nor lose any ,pportunity of improving or advancing himself in it. %he same Afternoon in which he left the %own! as Leonora stood at her #indow! a 'oach and *ix passed bywhich she declared to be the completest! genteelest! prettiest Equipage she ever saw; adding these remar able #ords! O . am in love with that &Buipage B which! tho+ her )riend 1owella at that time did not greatly regard! she hath since remembered. In the Evening an Assembly was held! which Leonora honoured with her 'ompany- but intended to pay her dear 1oratio the 'ompliment of refusing to dance in his Absence. , #hy have not #omen as good Resolution to maintain their Vows! as they have often good Inclinations in ma ing themB %he 4entleman who owned the 'oach and *ix! came to the Assembly. (is 'lothes were as remar ably fine as his Equipage could be. (e soon attracted the Eyes of the 'ompany! all the *marts! all the *il #aistcoats with *ilver and 4old Edgings! were eclipsed in an instant. .adam! said Adams, if it be not impertinent! I should be glad to now how this 4entleman was drest. *ir! answered the $ady! I have been told! he had on a 'ut0Velvet 'oat of a 'innamon 'olour! lined with a "in *atten! embroidered all over with 4old; his #aistcoat! which was 'loth of *ilver! was embroidered with 4old li ewise. I cannot be particular as to the rest of his &ress- but it was all in the -rench )ashion! for %ellarmine, 8that was his /ame9 was 7ust arrived from Paris . %his fine )igure did not more entirely engage the Eyes of every $ady in the Assembly! than Leonora did his. (e had scarce beheld her! but he stood motionless and fixed as a *tatue! or at least would have done so! if 4ood01reeding had permitted him. (owever! he carried it so far before he had power to correct himself! that every "erson in the Room easily discovered where his Admiration was settled. %he other $adies began to single out their former "artners! all perceiving who would be %ellarmine*s 'hoice; which they however endeavoured! by all possible means! to prevent- .any of them saying to her! :, .adam! I suppose we shan+t have the pleasure of seeing you dance %o0/ight;: and then crying out in %ellarmine*s hearing! :, Leonora will not dance! I assure you; her "artner is not here.: ,ne maliciously attempted to prevent her! by sending a disagreeable )ellow to as her! that so she might be obliged either to dance with him! or sit down- but this *cheme proved abortive.

$eonora saw herself admired by the fine *tranger! and envied by every #oman present. (er little (eart began to flutter within her! and her (ead was agitated with a convulsive .otion; she seemed as if she would spea to several of her Acquaintance! but had nothing to say- for as she would not mention her present %riumph! so she could not disengage her %houghts one moment from the 'ontemplation of it- *he had never tasted any thing li e this (appiness. *he had before nown what it was to torment a single #oman; but to be hated and secretly cursed by a whole Assembly! was a ?oy reserved for this blessed .oment. As this vast "rofusion of Ecstasy had awa ed her @nderstanding! so there was nothing so foolish as her 1ehaviour; she played a thousand childest %ric s! distorted her "erson into several *hapes! and her )ace into several $aughs! without any Reason. In a word! her 'arriage was as absurd as her &esires! which were to affect an Insensibility of the *tranger+s Admiration! and at the same time a %riumph from that Admiration over every #oman in the Room. In this %emper of .ind! %ellarmine, having enquired who she was! advanced to her! and with a low 1ow! begged the (onour of dancing with her! which she with as low a 'urt+sy immediately granted. *he danced with him all /ight! and en7oyed perhaps the highest "leasure! which she was capable of feeling. At these #ords! Adams fetched a deep 4roan! which frighted the $adies! who told him! :they hoped he was not ill.: (e answered! :he groaned only for the )olly of Leonora.: $eonora retired! 8continued the $ady9 about *ix in the .orning! but not to Rest. *he tumbled and tossed in her 1ed! with very short Intervals of *leep! and those entirely filled with &reams of the Equigage and fine 'lothes she had seen! and the 1alls! ,peras and Ridotto+s! which had been the *ub7ect of their 'onversation. In the Afternoon %ellarmine, in the dear 'oach and *ix! came to wait on her. (e was indeed charmed with her "erson! and was! on Enquiry! so well pleased with the 'ircumstances of her )ather! 8for he himself! notwithstanding all this )inery! was not quite so rich as a Cr9sus or an Attalus. Attalus, says .r. Adams, but pray how came you acquained with these /ames=: %he $ady smiled at the >uestion! and proceeded<(e was so pleased! I say! that he resolved to ma e his Addresses to her directly. (e did so accordingly! and that with so much warmth aud bris ness! that he quic ly baffled her wea Repulses! and obliged the $ady to refer him to her )ather! who! she new! would quic ly declare in favour of a 'oach and *ix. %hus! what 1oratio had by *ighs and %ears! $ove and %enderness! been so long obtaining! the -rench, &nglish %ellarmine with 4aiety and 4allantry possessed himself of in an instant. In other words! what .odesty had employed a full Aear in raising! Impudence demolished in FG (ours. (ere Adams groaned a second time! but the $adies! who began to smo e him! too no /otice. )rom the ,pening of the Assembly +till the End of %ellarmine*s Visit! Leonora had scarce once %hought of 1oratio- but he now began! tho+ an unwelcome 4uest! to enter into her .ind. *he wished she had seen the charming %ellarmine and his charming Equipage before .atters had gone so far. :Aet! why: 8says she9 :should I wish to have seen him before! or what signifies it that I have seen him now= Is not 1oratio my $over= almost my (usband= Is he not as handsome! nay handsomer than %ellarmine= Aye! but %ellarmine is the genteeler and the finer .an; yes! that he must be allowed. Aes! yes! he is that certainly. 1ut did not I no longer ago than yesterday love 1oratio more than all the #orld= aye! but yesterday I had not seen %ellarmine. 1ut doth not 1oratio doat on me! and may he not in despair brea his (eart if I abandon him= #ell! and hath not %ellarmine a (eart to brea too= Aes! but I promised 1oratio first; but that was poor %ellarmine*s .isfortune! if I had seen him first! I should certainly have preferred him. &id not the dear 'reature prefer me to every #oman in the Assembly! when every she was laying out for him= #hen was it in 1oratio*s power to give me such an Instance of Affection= 'an he give me an Equipage or any of those %hings which %ellarmine will ma e me .istress of= (ow vast is the &ifference between being the #ife of a poor 'ounsellor! and the #ife of one of %ellarmine*s )ortuneB 1ut can I suffer 1oratio to die= for he hath sworn he cannot survive my $oss- but perhaps he may not die; if he should! can I prevent it= .ust I sacrifice my self to him= besides! %ellarmine may be as miserable for me too.: *he was thus arguing with herself! when some young $adies called her to the #al s! and a little relieved her Anxiety for the present. %he next .orning %ellarmine brea fasted with her in presence of her Aunt! whom he sufficiently informed of his "assion for Leonora; he was no sooner withdrawn! than the old $ady began to advise her /iece on this ,ccasion. <:Aou see! 'hild!: 8says she9 :what )ortune hath thrown in your way! and I hope you will not

withstand your own "referments.: Leonora sighing! :begged her not to mention any such thing! when she new her Engagements to 1oratio.: :Engagements to a )ig!: cry+d the Aunt! you should than (eaven on your 2nees that you have it yet in your power to brea them. #ill any #oman hesitate a .oment! whether she shall ride in a 'oach or wal on )oot all the &ays of her $ife= <1ut %ellarmine drives six! and 1oratio not even a "air.: :Aes! but! .adam! what will the #orld say=: answered Leonora; :will not they condemn me=: %he #orld is always on the side of "rudence!: cries the Aunt! and would surely condemn you if you sacrificed your Interest to any .otive whatever. ,! I now the #orld very well! and you shew your own Ignorance! my &ear! by your ,b7ection. ,+ my 'onscience the #orld is wiser. I have lived longer in it than you! and I assure you there is not any thing worth our Regard besides .oney- nor did I ever now one "erson who married from other 'onsiderations! who did not afterwards heartily repent it. 1esides! if we examine the two .en! can you prefer a snea ing )ellow! who hath been bred at a @niversity! to a fine 4entleman 7ust come from his %ravels= <All the #orld must allow %ellarmine to be a fine 4entleman! positively a fine 4entleman! and a handsome .an.<: :"erhaps! .adam! I should not doubt! if I new how to be handsomely off with the other.: , leave that to me!: says the Aunt. Aou now your )ather hath not been acquainted with the Affair. Indeed! for my part! I thought it might do well enough! not dreaming of such an ,ffer- but I+ll disengage you! leave me to give the )ellow an Answer. I warrant you! he shall give you no farther %rouble.: $eonora was at length satisfied with her Aunt+s Reasoning; and %ellarmine supping with her that Evening! it was agreed he should the next .orning go to her )ather and propose the .atch! which she consented should be consummated at his Return. %he Aunt retired soon after *upper! and the $overs being left together! %ellarmine begun in the following manner- :Aes! .adam! this 'oat I assure you was made at Paris, and I defy the best &nglish %aylor even to imitate it. %here is not one of them can cut! .adam! they can+t cut. If you observe how this * irt is turned! and this *leeve! a clumsy &nglish Rascal can do nothing li e it. < :"ray how do you li e my $iveries=: Leonora answered! :she thought them very pretty.: :All -rench,: says he! :I assure you! except their 4reat 'oats; I never trust any thing more than a 4reat 'oat to an &nglishman; you now one must encourage our own "eople what one can! he! he! heB but for myself! I would see the dirty Island at the bottom of the *ea! rather than wear a single Rag of &nglish #or about me! and I am sure after you have made one %our to Paris, you will be of the same ,pinion with regard to your own 'lothes. Aou can+t conceive what an Addition a -rench &ress would be to your 1eauty; I positively assure you! at the first ,pera I saw since I came over! I mistoo the &nglish $adies for 'hambermaids! he! he! heB: #ith such sort of polite &iscourse did the gay %ellarmine entertain his beloved Leonora; when the &oor opened on a sudden! and 1oratio entered the Room; +tis impossible to express the *urpri5e of Leonora. :"oor #oman!: says .rs. 'lipslop, what a terrible Euandary she must be inB: :/ot at all!: says .iss #rave, airs, :such *luts can never be confounded.: A $ong *ilence! continued the $ady! prevailed in the whole 'ompany- If the familiar Entrance of 1oratio struc the greatest Astonishment into %ellarmine, the unexpected "resence of %ellarmine no less surpri5ed 1oratio. At length Leonora collecting all the *pirits she was .istress of! addressed herself to the latter! and pretended to wonder at the Reason of so late a Visit. :I should! indeed!: answered he! :have made some Apology for disturbing you at this (our! had not my finding you in 'ompany assured me I do not brea in on your Repose.: %ellarmine rose from his 'hair! traversed the Room in a .inuet *tep! and humm+d an ,pera %une! while 1oratio advancing to Leonora as +d her in a #hisper! if that 4entleman was not a Relation of her+s; to which she answered with a *mile! or rather *neer! :/o! he is no Relation of mine yet;: adding! she could not guess the .eaning of his >uestion.: 1oratio told her softly! :it did not arise from ?ealousy.: :?ealousyB: cries she! :I assure you;<it would be very strange in a common Acquaintance to give himself any of those Airs.: %hese #ords a little surpri5ed 1oratio, but before he had time to answer! %ellarmine danced up to the $ady! and told her! :he feared he interrupted some 1usiness between her and the 4entleman.: :I can have no 1usiness!: said she! :with the 4entleman! nor any other! which need be any *ecret to you.: :Aou+ll pardon me!: said 1oratio, if I desire to now who this 4entleman is! who is to be intrusted with all our *ecrets: :Aou+ll now soon enough!: cries Leonora, :but I can+t guess what *ecrets can ever pass between us of such mighty 'onsequence.: :/o .adamB: cries 1oratio, :I+m sure you would not have me

understand you in earnest.: It+s indifferent to me!: says she! :how you understand me; but I thin so unseasonable a Visit as difficult to be understood at all! at least when "eople find one engaged! though one+s *ervants do not deny one! one may expect a well0bred "erson should soon ta e the (int.: :.adam!: said 1oratio, :I did not imagine any Engagement with a *tranger! as it seems this 4entleman is! would have made my Visit impertinent! or that any such 'eremonies were to be preserved between "ersons in our *ituation.: :*ure you are in a &ream!: says she! :or would persuade me that I am in one. I now no pretensions a common Acquaintance can have to lay aside the 'eremonies of 4ood01reeding.: :*ure!: said he! :I am in a &ream; for it is impossible I should be really esteemed a common Acquaintance by Leonora, after what has passed between usB: "assed between usB &o you intend to affront me before this 4entleman= d<n me! affront the $ady!: says %ellarmine, coc ing his (at and strutting up to 1oratio, :does any .an dare affront this $ady before me! d<n me=: (ar ee! :*ir!: says 1oratio, :I would advise you to lay aside that fierce Air; for I am mightily deceived! if this $ady has not a violent &esire to get your #orship a good drubbing.: :*ir!: said %ellarmine, :I have the (onour to be her "rotector! and d<n me! if I understand your .eaning.: :*ir!: answered 1oratio, :she is rather your "rotectress- but give yourself no more Airs! for you see I am prepared for you!: 8sha ing his #hip at him9 :,hB 'erviteur tres humble,: says %ellarmine, 6!e <ous entend parfaitement bien.: At which time the Aunt! who had heard of 1oratio*s Visit! entered the Room and soon satisfied all his &oubts. *he convinced him that he was never more awa e in his $ife! and that nothing more extraordinary had happened in his three days Absence! than a small Alteration in the Affections of Leonorawho now burst into %ears! and wondered what Reason she had given him to use her in so barbarous a .anner. 1oratio desired %ellarmine to withdraw with him- but the $adies prevented it by laying violent (ands on the latter; upon which! the former too his $eave without any great 'eremony! and departed! leaving the $ady with his Rival to consult for his *afety! which Leonora feared her Indiscretion might have endangered- but the Aunt comforted her with Assurances! that 1oratio would not venture his "erson against so accomplished a 'avalier as %ellarmine, and that being a $awyer! he would see Revenge in his own way! and the most they had to apprehend from him was an Action. %hey at length therefore agreed to permit %ellarmine to retire to his $odgings! having first settled all .atters relating to the ?ourney which he was to underta e in the .orning! and their "reparations for the /uptials at his return. 1ut alasB as wife .en have observed! the *eat of Valour is not the 'ountenance! and many a grave and plain .an! will! on a 7ust "rovocation! beta e himself to that mischievous .etal! cold Iron; while .en of a fiercer 1row! and sometimes with that Emblem of 'ourage! a 'oc ade! will more prudently decline it. $eonora was wa ed in the .orning! from a Visionary 'oach and *ix! with the dismal Account! that %ellarmine was run through the 1ody by 1oratio, that he lay languishing at an Inn! and the *urgeons had declared the #ound mortal. *he immediately leap+d out of the 1ed! danced about the Room in a frantic manner! tore her (air and beat her 1reast in all the Agonies of &espair; in which sad 'ondition her Aunt! who li ewise arose at the /ews! found her. %he good old $ady applied her utmost Art to comfort her /iece. *he told her! :while there was $ife! there was (ope- but that if he should die! her Affliction would be of no service to %ellarmine, and would only expose herself! which might probably eep her some time without any future ,ffer; that as .atters had happened! her wisest way would be to thin no more of %ellarmine, but to endeavour to reconcile herself to 1oratio.: :*pea not to me!: cry+d the disconsolate Leonora, :is it not owing to me! that poor %ellarmine has lost his $ife= have not these cursed 'harms: 8at which #ords she loo ed stedfastly in the 4lass!9 :been the Ruin of the most charming .an of this Age= 'an I ever bear to contemplate my own )ace again=: 8with her Eyes still fixed on the 4lass9 :Am I not the .urderess of the finest 4entleman=<: :/ever thin of %hings passed!: cries the Aunt! :thin of reconciling yourself to 1oratio.: :#hat Reason!: said the /iece! :have I to hope he would forgive me= no! I have lost him as well as the other! and it was your wic ed Advice which was the ,ccasion of all; you seduced me! contrary to my Inclinations! to abandon poor 1oratio,: at which #ords she burst into %ears; :you prevailed upon me! whether I would or no! to give up my Affections for him; had it not been for you! %ellarmine never would have entered into my %houghts; had not his Addresses been bac ed by your "ersuasions! they never would have made any Impression on me; I should have defied all the )ortune and Equipage in the #orld- but it was

you! it was you! who got the better of my Aouth and *implicity! and forced me to lose my dear 1oratio for ever.: %he Aunt was almost borne down with this %orrent of #ords! she however rallied all the *trength she could! and drawing her .outh up in a "urse! began- :I am not surpri5ed! /iece! at this Ingratitude. %hose who advise young #omen for their Interest! must always expect such a Return- I am convinced my 1rother will than me for brea ing off your .atch with 1oratio at any rate.: :%hat may not be in your power yet!: answered Leonora; :tho+ it is very ungrateful in you to desire or attempt it! after the "resents you have received from him.: 8)or indeed true it is! that many "resents! and some pretty valuable ones! had passed from 1oratio to the old $ady- but as true it is! that %ellarmine when he brea fasted with her and her /iece! had complimented her with a 1rilliant from his )inger! of much greater Value than all she had touched of the other.9 %he Aunt+s 4all was on float to reply! when a *ervant brought a $etter into the Room; which Leonora hearing it came from %ellarmine, with great Eagerness opened! and read as follows$ost )ivine Creature, %he #ound which I fear you have heard I received from my Rival! is not li e to be so fatal as those shot into my (eart! which have been fired from your Eyes! tout,brilliant. %hose are the only 'annons by which I am to fall- for my *urgeon gives me (opes of being soon able to attend your 7uelle; +till when! unless you would do me an (onour which I have scarce the 1ardiesse to thin of! your Absence will be the greatest Anguish which can be felt by! .adam! Avec tout le respecte in the World, 4our most Obedient, most Absolute &evot;! 1ellarmine. As soon as Leonora perceived such (opes of %ellarmine*s Recovery! and that the 4ossip )ame had! according to 'ustom! so enlarged his &anger! she presently abandoned all farther %houghts of 1oratio, and was soon reconciled to her Aunt! who received her again into )avour! with a more 'hristian )orgiveness than we generally meet with. Indeed it is possible she might be a little alarmed at the (ints which her /iece had given her concerning the "resents. *he might apprehend such Rumours! should they get abroad! might in7ure a Reputation! which by frequenting 'hurch twice a day! and preserving the utmost Rigour and *trictness in her 'ountenance and 1ehaviour for many Aears! she had established. $eonora+s "assion returned now for %ellarmine with greater )orce after its small Relaxation than ever. *he proposed to her Aunt to ma e him a Visit in his 'onfinement! which the old $ady! with great and commendable "rudence advised her to decline- :)or!: says she! should any Accident intervene to prevent your intended .atch! too forward a 1ehaviour with this $over may in7ure you in the Eyes of others. Every #oman +till she is married ought to consider of and provide against the "ossibility of the Affair+s brea ing off.: Leonora said! :she should be indifferent to whatever might happen in such a 'ase- for she had now so absolutely placed her Affections on this dear .an 8so she called him9 that! if it was her misfortune to lose him! she should for ever abandon all %houghts of .an ind.: *he therefore resolved to visit him! notwithstanding all the prudent Advice of her Aunt to the contrary! and that very Afternoon executed her Resolution. %he $ady was proceeding in her *tory! when the 'oach drove into the Inn where the 'ompany were to dine! sorely to the dissatisfaction of .r. Adams, whose Ears were the most hungry "art about him; he being! as the Reader may perhaps guess! of an insatiable 'uriosity! and heartily desirous of hearing the End of this Amour! tho+ he professed he could scarce with *uccess to a $ady of so inconstant a &isposition. '(A". V. A dreadful Euarrel which happened at the .nn where the Company dined, with its bloody ConseBuences to $r. Adams.

As soon as the "assengers had alighted from the 'oach! .r. Adams, as was his 'ustom! made directly to the 2itchin! where he found !oseph sitting by the )ire and the (ostess anointing his $eg- for the (orse which .r. Adams had borrowed of his 'ler ! had so violent a "ropensity to neeling! that one would have thought it had li ewise been his %rade- nor would he always give any notice of such his Intention; he was often found on his 2nees! when the Rider least expected it. %his )oible however was of no great Inconvenience to the "arson! who was accustomed to it! and threw himself forward on such ,ccasions with so much dexterity! that he never received any .ischief; the (orse and he frequently rolling many "aces distance! and afterwards both getting up and meeting as good )riends as ever. "oor !oseph, who had not been used to such ind of 'attle! tho+ an excellent (orseman! did not so happily disengage himself- but falling with his $eg under the 1east! received a violent 'ontusion! to which the good #oman was! as we have said! applying a warm (and with some camphirated *pirits 7ust at the time when the "arson entered the 2itchin. (e had scarce express+d his 'oncern for !oseph*s .isfortune! before the (ost li ewise entered. (e was by no means of .r. (ow,wouse*s gentle &isposition! and was indeed perfect .aster of his (ouse and every thing in it but his 4uests. %his surly )ellow! who always proportioned his Respect to the Appearance of a %raveller! from #od bless your 1onour, down to plain Coming presently, observing his #ife on her 2nees to a )ootman! cried out! without considering his 'ircumstances! #hat a "ox is the #oman about= why don+t you mind the 'ompany in the 'oach= 4o and as them what they will have for &inner=: :.y &ear!: says she! :you now they can have nothing but what is at the )ire! which will be ready presently; and really the poor young .an+s $eg is very much bruised.: At which #ords! she fell to chafing more violently than before- the 1ell then happening to ring! he damn+d his #ife! and bid her go in to the 'ompany! and not stand rubbing there all day- for he did not believe the young )ellow+s $eg was so bad as he pretended; and if it was! within twenty .iles he would find a *urgeon to cut it off. @pon these #ords! Adams fetched two *trides across the Room; and snapping his )ingers over his (ead muttered aloud! (e would excommunicate such a #retch for a )arthing- for he believed the &evil had more (umanity. %hese #ords occasioned a &ialogue between Adams and the (ost! in which there were two or three sharp Replies! +till !oseph bad the latter now how to behave himself to his 1etters. At which the (ost scornfully repeating the word %etters, flew into a Rage! and telling !oseph he was as able to wal out of his (ouse as he had been to wal into it! offered to lay violent (ands on him; which Adams perceiving! dealt him so found a 'ompliment over his )ace with his )ist! that the 1lood immediately gushed out of his /ose in a *tream. %he (ost being unwilling to be out0done in 'ourtesy! especially by a "erson of Adams*s )igure! returned the )avour with so much 4ratitude! that the "erson+s /ostrils li ewise began to loo a little redder than usual. @pon which he again assailed his Antagonist! and with another stro e laid him sprawling on the )loor. %he (ostess! who was a better #ife than so surly a (usband deserved! seeing her (usband all bloody and stretched along! hastened presently to his assistance! or rather to revenge the 1low which to all appearance was the last he would ever receive; when! loB a "an full of (og+s01lood! which unluc ily stood on the &resser! presented itself first to her (ands. *he sei5ed it in her )ury! and without any Reflection discharged it into the "arson+s )ace! and with so good an Aim! that much the greater part first saluting his 'ountenance! tric led thence in so large a current down his 1eard! and over his 4arments! that a more horrible *pectacle was hardly to be seen or even imagined. All which was perceived by .rs. 'lipslop, who entered the 2itchin at that Instant. %his good 4entlewoman! not being of a %emper so extremely cool and patient as perhaps was required to as many >uestions on this ,ccasion; flew with great Impetuosity at the (ostess+s 'ap! which! together with some of her (air! she pluc ed from her (ead in a moment! giving her at the same time several hearty 'uffs in the )ace! which by frequent "ractice on the inferiour *ervants! she had learned an excellent 2nac of delivering with a good 4race. "oor !oseph could hardly rise from his 'hair; the "arson was employed in wiping the 1lood from his Eyes! which had intirely blinded him! and the $andlord was but 7ust beginning to stir! whilst .rs. 'lipslop holding down the $andlady+s )ace with her $eft (and! made so dextrous a use of her Right! that the poor #oman began to roar in a 2ey! which alarmed all the 'ompany in the Inn.

%here happened to be in the Inn at this time! besides the $adies who arrived in the *tage0'oach! the two 4entlemen who were present at .r. (ow,wouse*s when !oseph was detained for his (orse+s0.eat! and whom we have before mentioned to have stopt at the Alehouse with Adams. %here was li ewise a 4entleman 7ust returned from his %ravels; all whom the horrid ,utcry of .urther! presently brought into the 2itchin! where the several 'ombatants were found in the "ostures already described. It was now no difficulty to put an end to the )ray! the 'onquerors being satisfied with the Vengeance they had ta en! and the 'onquered having no Appetite to renew the )ight. %he principal )igure! and which engaged the Eyes of all was Adams, who was all over covered with 1lood! which the whole 'ompany concluded to be his own; and consequently imagined him no longer for this #orld. 1ut the (ost! who had now recovered from his 1low! and was risen from the 4round! soon delivered them from this Apprehension! by damning his #ife! for wasting the (og+s "uddings! and telling her all would have been very well if she had not intermeddled li e a 1< as she was; adding! he was very glad the 4entlewoman had paid her! tho+ not half what she deserved. %he poor #oman had indeed fared much the worst! having! besides the unmerciful 'uffs received! lost a >uantity of (air which .rs. 'lipslop in %riumph held in her left (and. %he %raveller! addressing himself to .iss #rave,airs, desired her not to be frightened- for here had been only a little 1oxing! which he said to their )isgracia the &nglish were accustomata to; adding! it must be however a *ight somewhat strange to him! who was 7ust come from .taly, the .talians not being addicted to the Ciffardo, but %aston2a, says he. (e then went up to Adams, and telling him he loo ed li e the 4host of Othello, bid him not sha"e his gory Loc"s at him, for he could not say he did it . Adams very innocently answered! 'ir, . am far from accusing you. (e then returned to the $ady! and cried! I find the bloody 4entleman is uno insipido del nullo senso. ,ne of the 4entlemen having learnt from the (ost the ,ccasion of this 1ustle! and being assured by him that Adams had struc the first 1low! whispered in his Ear- (e+d warrant he would recover . :RecoverB .aster!: said the (ost! smiling- :Aes! yes! I am not afraid of dying with a 1low or two neither; I am not such a 'hic en as that.: "ughB said the 4entleman! I mean you will recover &amages! in that Action which undoubtedly you intend to bring! as soon as a #rit can be returned from London; for you loo li e a .an of too much *pirit and 'ourage to suffer any one to beat you without bringing your Action against him- (e must be a scandalous )ellow indeed! who would put up a &rubbing whilst the $aw is open to revenge it; besides! he hath drawn 1lood from you and spoiled your 'oat! and the ?ury will give &amages for that too. An excellent new 'oat upon my #ord! and now not worth a *hillingB I &on+t care! continued he! to intermeddle in these 'ases- but you have a Right to my Evidence; and if I am sworn! I must spea the %ruth. I saw you sprawling on the )loor! and the 1lood gushing from your /ostrils. Aou may ta e your own ,pinion; but was I in your 'ircumstances! every &rop of my 1lood should convey an ,unce of 4old into my "oc et- remember I don+t advise you to go to $aw! but if your ?ury were 'hristians! they must give swinging &amages! that+s all. :.aster!: cry+d the (ost! scratching his (ead! :I have no stomach to $aw! I than you. I have seen enough of that in the "arish! where two of my /eighbours have been at $aw about a (ouse! +till they have both lawed themselves into a 4oal.: At which #ords he turned about! and began to enquire again after his (og+s "uddings! nor would it probably have been a sufficient Excuse for his #ife that she spilt them in his &efence! had not some Awe of the 'ompany! especially of the .talian %raveller! with0held his Rage. #hilst one of the above0mentioned 4entlemen was employed! as we have seen him! on the behalf of the $andlord! the other was no less hearty on the side of .r. Adams, whom he advised to bring his Action immediately. (e said the Assault of the #ife was in $aw the Assault of the (usband; for they were but one "erson; and he was liable to pay &amages! which he said must be considerable! where so bloody a &isposition appeared. Adams answered! if it was true that they were but one "erson he had assaulted the #ife; for he was sorry to own he had struc the (usband the first 1low. I am sorry you own it too! cries the 4entleman; for it could not possibly appear to the 'ourt- for here was no Evidence present but the lame .an in the 'hair! whom I supposed to be your )riend! and would consequently say nothing but what made for you. (ow! *ir! says Adams, do you ta e me for a Villain! who would prosecute Revenge in cold 1lood! and use un7ustifiable .eans to obtain it= If you new me and my ,rder! I should thin you affronted both. At the word ,rder! the 4entleman stared! 8for he was too bloody to be of any modern ,rder of 2nights!9 and turning hastily about! said! every .an new his own 1usiness.

.atters being now composed! the 'ompany retired to their several Apartments! the two 4entlemen congratulating each other on the *uccess of their good ,ffices! in procuring a perfect Reconciliation between the contending "arties; and the %raveller went to his Repast! crying- (utta ? Pace; so send in my )inner, good 1oniface. %he 'oachman began now to grow importunate with his "assengers! whose Entrance into the 'oach was retarded by .iss #rave,airs insisting! against the Remonstrances of all the rest! that she would not admit a )ootman into the 'oach- for poor !oseph was too lame to mount a (orse. A young $ady! who was! as it seems! an Earl+s 4rand &aughter! begged it with almost %ears in her Eyes; .r. Adams prayed! and .rs. 'lipslop scolded! but all to no purpose. *he said! :she would not demean herself to ride with a )ootman- that there were #aggons on the Road- that if the .aster of the 'oach desired it! she would pay for two "lacesbut would suffer no such )ellow to come in.: :.adam!: says 'lipslop, :I am sure no one can refuse another coming into a *tage0'oach.: :I don+t now! .adam!: says the $ady! :I am not much used to *tage0'oaches! I seldom travel in them.: :%hat may be! .adam!: replied 'lipslop, :very good "eople do! and some "eople+s 1etters! for aught I now.: .iss #rave,airs said! :some )ol s! might sometimes give their %ongues a liberty! to some "eople that were their 1etters! which did not become them- for her part! she was not used to converse with *ervants.: 'lipslop returned! :some "eople ept no *ervants to converse with- for her part! she than ed (eaven! she lived in a )amily where there were a great many; and had more under her own 'ommand! than any paultry little 4entlewoman in the 2ingdom.: .iss #rave,airs cry+d! she believed! her .istress would not encourage such *auciness to her 1etters.: :.y 1etters!: says 'lipslop, :who is my 1etters! pray=: :I am your 1etters!: answered .iss #rave,airs, :and I+ll acquaint your .istress.: <At which .rs. 'lipslop laughed aloud! and told her! :her $ady was one of the great 4entry! and such little paultry 4entlewomen! as some )ol s who travelled in *tage0'oaches! would not easily come at her.: %his smart &ialogue between some "eople! and some )ol s! was going on at the 'oach0&oor! when a solemn "erson riding into the Inn! and seeing .iss #rave,airs, immediately accosted her with :&ear 'hild! how do you=: *he presently answered! :,B "apa! I am glad you have overta en me.: :*o am I!: answered he- :for one of our 'oaches is 7ust at hand; and there being room for you in it! you shall go no farther in the *tage! unless you desire it.: :(ow can you imagine I should desire it=: says she; so bidding 'lipslop, :ride with her )ellow! if she pleased;: she too her )ather by the (and! who was 7ust alighted! and wal ed with him into a Room. Adams instantly as ed the 'oachman in a #hisper! if he new who the 4entleman was= %he 'oachman answered! he was not a 4entleman! and ept his (orse and .an- but %imes are altered! .aster! said he! I remember! when he was no better born than myself. Aye! aye! says Adams. .y )ather drove the *quire+s 'oach! answered he! when that very .an rode "ostilion- but he is now his *teward! and a great 4entleman. Adams then snapped his )ingers! and cry+d! he thought she was some such (rollop. Adams made haste to acquaint .rs. 'lipslop with this good /ews! as he imagined it; but it found a Reception different from what he expected. %hat prudent 4entlewoman! who despised the Anger of .iss #rave,airs, whilst she conceived her the &aughter of a 4entleman of small )ortune! now she heard her Alliance with the upper *ervants of a great )amily in her /eighbourhood! began to fear her Interest with the .istress. *he wished she had not carried the &ispute so far! and began to thin of endeavouring to reconcile herself to the young $ady before she left the Inn; when luc ily! the *cene at London, which the Reader can scarce have forgotten! presented itself to her .ind! and comforted her with such Assurance! that she no longer apprehended any Enemy with her .istress. Every thing being now ad7usted! the 'ompany entered the 'oach! which was 7ust on its &eparture! when one $ady recollected she had left her )an! a second her 4loves! a third a *nuff01ox! and a fourth a *melling0 1ottle behind her; to find all which! occasioned some &elay! and much swearing of the 'oachman. As soon as the 'oach had left the Inn! the #omen all together fell to the 'haracter of .iss #rave,airs, whom one of them declared she had suspected to be some low 'reature from the beginning of their ?ourney; and another affirmed had not even the $oo s of a 4entlewoman; a third warranted she was no better than she should be! and turning to the $ady who had related the *tory in the 'oach! said! :&id you ever hear! .adam! any thing so prudish as her Remar s=: #ell! deliver me from the 'ensoriousness of such a "rude. %he fourth added! :, .adamB all these 'reatures are censorious- but for my part! I wonder where the #retch was bred;

indeed I must own I have seldom conversed with these mean ind of "eople! so that it may appear stranger to me; but to refuse the general &esire of a whole 'ompany! hath something in it so astonishing! that! for my part! I own I should hardly believe it! if my own Ears had not been #itnesses to it.: :Aes! and so handsome a young )ellow! cries 'lipslop, the #oman must have no 'ompassion in her! I believe she is more of a (ur" than a 'hristian; I am certain if she had any 'hristian #oman+s 1lood in her Veins! the *ight of such a young )ellow must have warm+d it. Indeed there are some wretched! miserable old ,b7ects that turn one+s *tomach! I should not wonder if she had refused such a one; I am as nice as herself! and should have cared no more than herself for the 'ompany of stin"ing old )ellows- but hold up thy (ead! !oseph, thou art none of those! and she who hath no Compulsion for thee is a $yhummetman, and I will maintain it.: %his 'onversation made !oseph uneasy! as well as the $adies; who perceiving the *pirits which .rs. 'lipslop was in! 8for indeed she was not a 'up too low9 began to fear the 'onsequence; one of them therefore desired the $ady to conclude the *tory<:Ay .adam!: said 'lipslop, :I beg your $adyship to give us that *tory you commencated in the .orning!: which Request that well0bred #oman immediately complied with. '(A". VI. Conclusion of the Dnfortunate !ilt. Leonora having once bro e through the 1ounds which 'ustom and .odesty impose on her *ex! soon gave an unbridled Indulgence to her "assion. (er Visits to %ellarmine were more constant! as well as longer! than his *urgeon+s; in a word! she became absolutely his /urse! made his #ater0gruel! administred him his .edicines! and! notwithstanding the prudent Advice of her Aunt to the contrary! almost intirely resided in her wounded $over+s Apartment. %he $adies of the %own began to ta e her 'onduct under consideration; it was the chief %opic of &iscourse at their %ea0%ables! and was very severely censured by the most part; especially by Lindamira, a $ady whose discreet and starch 'arriage! together with a constant Attendance at 'hurch three times a day! had utterly defeated many malicious Attac s on her own Reputation- for such was the Envy that Lindamira*s Virtue had attracted! that notwithstanding her own strict 1ehaviour and strict Enquiry into the $ives of others! she had not been able to escape being the .ar of some Arrows herself! which however did her no In7ury; a 1lessing perhaps owed by her to the 'lergy! who were her chief male 'ompanions! and with two or three of whom she had been barbarously and un7ustly calumniated. /ot so un7ustly neither perhaps! says 'lipslop, for the 'lergy are .en as well as other )ol s. %he extreme &elicacy of Lindamira*s Virtue was cruelly hurt by these )reedoms which Leonora allowed herself; she said! :it was an Affront to her *ex! that she did not imagine it consistent with any #oman+s (onour to spea to the 'reature! or to be seen in her 'ompany; and that! for her part! she should always refuse to dance at an Assembly with her! for fear of 'ontamination! by ta ing her by the (and.: 1ut to return to my *tory- As soon as %ellarmine was recovered! which was somewhat within a .onth from his receiving the #ound! he set out! according to Agreement! for Leonora*s )ather+s! in order to propose the .atch and settle all .atters with him touching *ettlements! and the li e. A little before his Arrival! the old 4entleman had received an Intimation of the Affair by the following $etter; which I can repeat verbatim, and which they say was written neither by Leonora nor her Aunt! tho+ it was in a #oman+s (and. %he $etter was in these #ords:'.7, I am sorry to acquaint you that your &aughter Leonora hath acted one of the basest! as well as most simple "arts with a young 4entleman to whom she had engaged herself! and whom she hath 8pardon the #ord9 7ilted for another of inferiour )ortune! notwithstanding his superiour )igure. Aou may ta e what .easures you please on this ,ccasion; I have performed what I thought my &uty! as I have! tho+ un nown to you! a very great Respect for your )amily.: %he old 4entleman did not give himself the trouble to answer this ind Epistle! nor did he ta e any notice of it after he had read it! +till he saw %ellarmine. (e was! to say the truth! one of those )athers who loo on 'hildren as an unhappy 'onsequence of their youthful "leasures; which as he would have been delighted not to have had attended them! so was he no less pleased with any opportunity to rid himself of the Incumbrance.

(e pass+d in the #orld+s $anguage as an exceeding good )ather! being not only so rapacious as to rob and plunder all .an ind to the utmost of his power! but even to deny himself the 'onveniencies and almost /ecessaries of $ife; which his /eighbours attributed to a desire of raising immense )ortunes for his 'hildren- but in fact it was not so! he heaped up .oney for its own sa e only! and loo ed on his 'hildren as his Rivals! who were to en7oy his beloved .istress! when he was incapable of possessing her! and which he would have been much more charmed with the "ower of carrying along with him- nor had his 'hildren any other *ecurity of being his (eirs! than that the $aw would constitute them such without a #ill! and that he had not Affection enough for any one living to ta e the trouble of writing one. %o this 4entleman came %ellarmine on the Errand I have mentioned. (is "erson! his Equipage! his )amily and his Estate seemed to the )ather to ma e him an advantageous .atch for his &aughter; he therefore very readily accepted his "roposals- but %ellarmine when he imagined the principal Affair concluded! and began to open the incidental .atters of )ortune; the old 4entleman presently changed his 'ountenance! saying! :he resolved never to marry his &aughter on a 'mithfield .atch; that whoever had $ove for her to ta e her! would! when he died! find her *hare of his )ortune in his 'offers- but he had seen such Examples of @ndutifulness happen from the too early 4enerosity of "arents! that he had made a Vow never to part with a *hilling whilst he lived. (e commended the *aying of 'olomon, he that spareth the 7od, spoileth the Child but added! he might have li ewise asserted! that he that spareth the Purse, saveth the Child.: (e then ran into a &iscourse on the Extravagance of the Aouth of the Age; whence he launched into a &issertation on (orses! and came at length to commend those %ellarmine drove. %hat fine 4entleman! who at another *eason would have been well enough pleased to dwell a little on that *ub7ect! was now very eager to resume the 'ircumstance of )ortune. (e said! :he had a very high value for the young $ady! and would receive her with less than he would any other whatever; but that even his $ove to her made some Regard to worldly .atters necessary; for it would be a most distracting *ight for him to see her! when he had the (onour to be her (usband! in less than a 'oach and *ix.: %he old 4entleman answer+d! :)our will do! )our will do;: and then too a turn from (orses to Extravagance! and from Extravagance to (orses! till he came round to the Equipage again! whither he was no sooner arrived! than %ellarmine brought him bac to the "oint; but all to no purpose! he made his Escape in a .inute! till at last the $over declared! :that in the present *ituation of his Affairs it was impossible for him! though he loved Leonora more than tout le monde, to marry her without any )ortune.: %o which the )ather answered! :he was sorry then his &aughter must lose so valuable a .atch; that if he had an Inclination at present! it was not in his power to advance a *hilling- that he had had great $osses and been at great Expences on "ro7ects! which! though he had great Expectation from them! had yet produced him nothing- that he did not now what might happen hereafter! as on the 1irth of a *on! or such Accident! but he would ma e no promise! or enter into any Article- for he would not brea his Vow for all the &aughters in the #orld:. In short! $adies! to eep you no longer in suspense! %ellarmine having tried every Argument and "ersuasion which he could invent! and finding them all ineffectual! at length too his leave! but not in order to return to Leonora; he proceeded directly to his own *eat! whence after a few &ay+s stay! he returned to Paris, to the great delight of the -rench, and the honour of the &nglish /ation. 1ut as soon as he arrived at his home! he presently dispatched a .essenger! with the following Epistle to Leonora. Adorable and Charmante, I Am sorry to have the (onour to tell you I am not the heureu8 "erson destined for your divine Arms. Aour "apa hath told me so with a Politesse not often seen on this side Paris. Aou may perhaps guess his manner of refusing me<Ah mon )ieuB Aou will certainly believe me! .adam! incapable of my self delivering this triste .essage- #hich I intend to try the -rench Air to cure the 'onsequences of<Ah =amaisB C9urB AngeB <Ab )iableB <If your "apa obliges you to a .arriage! I hope we shall see you at Paris, till when the #ind that flows from thence will be the warmest dans le $onde- for it will consist almost entirely of my *ighs! Adieu, ma Princesse5 Ah Amour B %&LLA7$. &.6 I *hall not attempt $adies! to describe Leonora*s 'ondition when she received this $etter. It is a "icture of (orrour! which I should have as little pleasure in drawing as you in beholding. *he immediately left the

"lace! where she was the *ub7ect of 'onversation and Ridicule! and retired to that (ouse I shewed you when I began the *tory! where she hath ever since led a disconsolate $ife! and deserves perhaps "ity for her .isfortunes more than our 'ensure! for a 1ehaviour to which the Artifices of her Aunt very probably contributed! and to which very young #omen are often rendered too liable! by that blameable $evity in the Education of our *ex. If I was inclined to pity her! said a young $ady in the 'oach! it would be for the $oss of 1oratio; for I cannot discern any .isfortune in her missing such a (usband as %ellarmine. #hy I must own! says 'lipslop, the 4entleman was a little false0hearted- but howsumever it was hard to have two $overs! and get never a (usband at all< 1ut pray! .adam! what became of Ourasho= (e remains still unmarried! and hath applied himself so strictly to his 1usiness! that he hath raised I hear a very considerable )ortune. And what is remar able! they say! he never heard the name of Leonora without a *igh! or hath ever uttered one *yllable to charge her with her ill 'onduct towards him. '(A". VII. A very short Chapter, in which Parson Adams went a great Way. %he $ady having finished her *tory received the %han s of the 'ompany! and now !oseph putting his (ead out of the 'oach! cried out! :/ever believe me! if yonder be not our "arson Adams wal ing along without his (orse.: :,n my #ord! and so he is!: says 'lipslop; :and as sure as %wo0pence! he hath left him behind at the Inn.: Indeed! true it is! the "arson had exhibited a fresh Instance of his Absence of .ind- for he was so pleased with having got !oseph into the 'oach! that he never once thought of the 1east in the *table; and finding his $egs as nimble as he desired! he sallied out brandishing a 'rabstic ! and had ept on before the 'oach! mending and slac ening his "ace occasionally! so that he had never been much more or less than a >uarter of a .ile distant from it. .rs. 'lipslop desired the 'oachman to overta e him! which he attempted! but in vain- for the faster he drove! the faster ran the "arson! often crying out! Aye aye, catch me if you can- +till at length the 'oachman swore he would as soon attempt to drive after a 4reyhound; and giving the "arson two or three hearty 'urses! he cry+d! *oftly! softly 1oys! to his (orses! which the civil 1easts immediately obeyed. 1ut we will be more courteous to our Reader than he was to .rs. 'lipslop, and leaving the 'oach and its 'ompany to pursue their ?ourney! we will carry our Reader on after "arson Adams, who stretched on without once loo ing behind him! +till having left the 'oach full three .iles in his Rear! he came to a "lace! where by eeping the extremest %rac to the Right! it was 7ust barely possible for a human 'reature to miss his #ay. %his %rac however did he eep! as indeed he had a wonderful 'apacity at these inds of bare "ossibilities; and travelling in it about three .iles over the "lain! he arrived at the *ummit of a (ill! whence loo ing a great way bac wards! and perceiving no 'oach in sight! he sat himself down on the %urf! and pulling out his Cschylus determined to wait here for its Arrival. (e had not sat long here! before a 4un going off very near! a little startled him; he loo ed up! and saw a 4entleman within a hundred "aces ta ing up a "artridge! which he had 7ust shot. Adams stood up! and presented a )igure to the 4entleman which would have moved $aughter in many; for his 'assoc had 7ust again fallen down below his great 'oat! that is to say! it reached his 2nees; whereas! the * irts of his great 'oat descended no lower than half way down his %highs- but the 4entleman+s .irth gave way to his *urpri5e! at beholding such a "ersonage in such a "lace. Adams advancing to the 4entleman told him he hoped he had good *port; to which the other answered! very little. :I see! *ir!: says Adams, :you have smote one "artridge-: to which the *portsman made no Reply! but proceeded to charge his "iece. #hilst the 4un was charging! Adams remained in *ilence! which he at last bro e! by observing that it was a delightful Evening. %he 4entleman! who had at first sight conceived a very distasteful ,pinion of the "arson! began! on perceiving a 1oo in his (and! and smo ing li ewise the Information of the 'assoc ! to change his %houghts! and made a small Advance to 'onversation on his side! by saying! *ir! . suppose you are not one of these Parts=

Adams immediately told him! /o; that he was a %raveller! and invited by the 1eauty of the Evening and the "lace to repose a little! and amuse himself with reading. :I may as well repose myself too! said the *portsman; for I have been out this whole Afternoon! and the &evil a 1ird have I seen +till I came hither.: :"erhaps then the 4ame is not very plenty hereabouts! cries Adams .: :/o! *ir!: said the 4entleman! :the *oldiers! who are quartered in the /eighbourhood! have illed it all.: :It is very probable!: cries Adams, :for *hooting is their "rofession.: :Ay! shooting the 4ame!: answered the other! :but I don+t see they are so forward to shoot our Enemies. I don+t li e that Affair of Carthagena; if I had been there! I believe I should have done other guess things! d<n me; what+s a .an+s $ife when his 'ountry demands it; a .an who won+t sacrifice his $ife for his 'ountry deserves to be hanged! d<n me.: #hich #ords he spo e with so violent a 4esture! so loud a Voice! so strong an Accent! and so fierce a 'ountenance! that he might have frightned a 'aptain of %rained01ands at the (ead of his 'ompany; but .r. Adams was not greatly sub7ect to )ear! he told him intrepidly that he very much approved his Virtue! but disli ed his *wearing! and begged him not to addict himself to so bad a 'ustom! without which he said he might fight as bravely as Achilles did. Indeed he was charm+d with this &iscourse! he told the 4entleman he would willingly have gone many .iles to have met a .an of his generous #ay of thin ing; that if he pleased to sit down! he should be greatly delighted to commune with him- for tho+ he was a 'lergyman! he would himself be ready! if thereto called! to lay down his $ife for his 'ountry. %he 4entleman sat down and Adams by him! and then the latter began! as in the following 'hapter! a &iscourse which we have placed by itself! as it is not only the most curious in this! but perhaps in any other 1oo . '(A". VIII. A notable )issertation, by $r. Abraham Adams; wherein that #entleman appears in a political Light. :I do assure you! *ir!: says he! ta ing the 4entleman by the (and! :I am heartily glad to meet with a .an of your 2idney- for tho+ I am a poor "arson! I will be bold to say! I am an honest .an! and would not do an ill %hing to be made a 1ishop- /ay! tho+ it hath not fallen in my way to offer so noble a *acrifice! I have not been without ,pportunities of suffering for the sa e of my 'onscience! I than (eaven for them- for I have had Relations! tho+ I say it! who made some )igure in the #orld; particularly a /ephew! who was a *hop eeper! and an Alderman of a 'orporation. (e was a good $ad! and was under my 'are when a 1oy! and I believe would do what I bid him to his dying &ay. Indeed! it loo s li e extreme Vanity in me! to affect being a .an of such 'onsequence! as to have so great an Interest in an Alderman; but others have thought so too! as manifestly appeared by the Rector! whose 'urate I formerly was! sending for me on the Approach of an Election! and telling me if I expected to continue in his 'ure! that I must bring my /ephew to vote for one 'olonel Courtley, a 4entleman whom I had never heard %idings of +till that Instant. I told the Rector! I had no power over my /ephew+s Vote! 84od forgive me for such "revaricationB9 %hat I supposed he would give it according to his 'onscience! that I would by no means endeavour to influence him to give it otherwise. (e told me it was in vain to equivocate; that he new I had already spo e to him in favour of Esquire -ic"le my /eighbour! and indeed it was true I had- for it was at a *eason when the Church was in )anger, and when all good .en expected they new not what would happen to us all. I then answered boldly! If he thought I had given my "romise! he affronted me! in proposing any 1reach of it. /ot to be prolix- I persevered! and so did my /ephew! in the Esquire+s Interest! who was chose chiefly through his .eans! and so I lost my 'uracy.: :#ell! *ir! but do you thin the Esquire ever mentioned a #ord of the 'hurch= e verbum Buidem, ut ita dicam; within two Aears he got a "lace! and hath ever since lived in London; where I have been informed! 8but 4< forbid I should believe that9 that he never so much as goeth to 'hurch. I remained! *ir! a considerable %ime without any 'ure! and lived a full .onth on one )uneral *ermon! which I preached on the Indisposition of a 'lergyman- but this by the 1ye. At last! when .r. -ic"le got his "lace! 'olonel Courtly stood again; and who should ma e Interest for him! but .r. -ic"le himself- that very identical .r. -ic"le, who had formerly told me! the 'olonel was an Enemy to both the 'hurch and *tate! had the 'onfidence to sollicite my /ephew for him! and the 'olonel himself offered me to ma e me 'haplain to his Regiment! which I refused in favour of *ir Oliver 1earty, who told us! he would sacrifice every thing to his 'ountry;

and I believe he would! except his (unting! which he stuc so close to! that in five Aears together! he went but twice up to "arliament; and one of those %imes! I have been told! never was within sight of the (ouse. (owever! he was a worthy .an! and the best )riend I ever had- for by his Interest with a 1ishop! he got me replaced into my 'uracy! and gave me eight "ounds out of his own "oc et to buy me a 4own and 'assoc ! and furnish my (ouse. (e had our Interest while he lived! which was not many Aears. ,n his &eath! I had fresh Applications made to me; for all the #orld new the Interest I had in my good /ephew! who now was a leading .an in the 'orporation; and *ir (homas %ooby, buying the Estate which had been *ir Oliver*s, proposed himself a 'andidate. (e was then a young 4entleman 7ust come from his %ravels; and it did me good to hear him discourse on Affairs! which for my part I new nothing of. If I had been .aster of a thousand Votes! he should have had them all. I engaged my /ephew in his Interest! and he was elected! and a very fine "arliament0.an he was. %hey tell me he made *peeches of an (our long; and I have been told very fine ones- but he could never persuade the "arliament to be of his ,pinion. < on omnia possumus omnes. (e promised me a $iving! poor .an; and I believe I I should have had it! but an Accident happened; which was! that my $ady had promised it before un nown to him. %his indeed I never heard +till afterwards- for my /ephew! who died about a .onth before the Incumbent! always told me I might be assured of it. *ince that %ime! *ir (homas, poor .an! had always so much 1usiness! that he never could find $eisure to see me. I believe it was partly my $ady+s fault too- who did not thin my &ress good enough for the 4entry at her %able. (owever! I must do him the ?ustice to say! he never was ungrateful; and I have always found his 2itchin! and his 'ellar too! open to me; many a time after *ervice on a 'unday, for I preach at four 'hurches! have I recruited my *pirits with a 4lass of his Ale. *ince my /ephew+s &eath! the 'orporation is in other hands; and I am not a .an of that 'onsequence I was formerly. I have now no longer any %alents to lay out in the *ervice of my 'ountry; and to whom nothing is given! of him can nothing be required. (owever! on all proper *easons! such as the Approach of an Election! I throw a suitable &ash or two into my *ermons; which I have the pleasure to hear is not disagreeable to *ir (homas, and the other honest 4entlemen my /eighbours! who have all promised me these five Aears! to procure an ,rdination for a *on of mine! who is now near %hirty! hath an infinite *toc of $earning! and is! I than (eaven! of an unexceptionable $ife; tho+! as he was never at an @niversity! the 1ishop refuses to ordain him. %oo much 'are cannot indeed be ta en in admitting any to the sacred ,ffice; tho+ I hope he will never act so as to be a &isgrace to any ,rder- but will serve his 4od and his 'ountry to the utmost of his power! as I have endeavoured to do before him; nay! and will lay down his $ife whenever called to that purpose. I am sure I have educated him in those "rinciples; so that I have acquitted my &uty! and shall have nothing to answer for on that account- but I do not distrust trust him; for he is a good 1oy; and if "rovidence should throw it in his way! to be of much consequence in a public $ight! as his )ather once was! I can answer for him! he will use his %alents as honestly as I have done. '(A". IC. .n which the #entleman descants on %ravery and heroic <irtue, *till an unluc"y Accident puts an end to the )iscourse. %he 4entleman highly commended .r. Adams for his good Resolutions! and told him! :he hoped his *on would tread in his *teps;: adding! :that if he would not die for his 'ountry! he would not be worthy to live in it; I+d ma e no more of shooting a .an that would not die for his 'ountry! than< :*ir!: said he! :I have disinherited a /ephew who is in the Army! because he would not exchange his 'ommission! and go to the West,.ndies. I believe the Rascal is a 'oward! tho+ he pretends to be in love forsooth. I would have all such )ellows hanged! *ir! I would have them hanged.: Adams answered! :that would be too severe- %hat .en did not ma e themselves; and if )ear had too much Ascendance in the .ind! the .an was rather to be pitied than abhorred- %hat Reason and %ime might teach him to subdue it.: :(e said! a .an might be a 'oward at one time! and brave at another. 1omer,: says he! :who so well understood and copied /ature! hath taught us this $esson- for Paris fights! and 1ector runs away- nay! we have a mighty Instance of this in the (istory of later Ages! no longer ago! than the HIJth Aear of 7ome, when the 4reat Pompey, who had won so many 1attles! and been honoured with so many %riumphs! and of whose Valour! several Authors! especially Cicero and Paterculus, have formed such Elogiums; this very Pompey left the

1attle of Pharsalia before he had lost it! and retreated to his %ent! where he sat li e the most pusillanimous Rascal in a )it of &espair! and yielded a Victory! which was to determine the Empire of the #orld! to C9sar . I am not much travelled in the (istory of modern %imes! that is to say! these last thousand Aears- but those who are! can! I ma e no question! furnish you with parallel Instances.: (e concluded therefore! that had he ta en any such hasty Resolutions against his /ephew! he hoped he would consider better and retract them. %he 4entleman answered with great #armth! and tal ed much of 'ourage and his 'ountry! +till perceiving it grew late! he as ed Adams, :what "lace he intended for that /ight=: (e told him! :he waited there for the *tage0'oach.: :%he *tage0'oachB *ir!: said the 4entleman! :they are all past by long ago. Aou may see the last yourself! almost three .iles before us.: :I protest and so they are!: cries Adams, then I must ma e haste and follow them.: %he 4entleman told him! :he would hardly be able to overta e them; and that if he did not now his #ay! he would be in danger of losing himself on the &owns; for it would be presently dar ; and he might ramble about all /ight! and perhaps! find himself farther from his ?ourney+s End in the .orning than he was now. (e advised him therefore to accompany him to his (ouse! which was very little out of his way!: assuring him! :that he would find some 'ountry0)ellow in his "arish! who would conduct him for *ixpence to the 'ity! where he was going.: Adams accepted this "roposal! and on they travelled! the 4entleman renewing his &iscourse on 'ourage! and the Infamy of not being ready at all times to sacrifice our $ives to our 'ountry. /ight overtoo them much about the same time as they arrived near some 1ushes- whence! on a sudden! they heard the most violent *hrie s imaginable in a female Voice. Adams offered to snatch the 4un out of his 'ompanion+s (and. :#hat are you doing=: said he. :&oingB: says Adams, :I am hastening to the Assistance of the poor 'reature whom some Villains are murdering.: :Aou are not mad enough! I hope!: says the 4entleman! trembling- :&o you consider this 4un is only charged with *hot! and that the Robbers are most probably furnished with "istols loaded with 1ullets. %his is no 1usiness of ours; let us ma e as much haste as possible out of the way! or we may fall into their hands ourselves.: %he *hrie s now encreasing! Adams made no Answer! but snapt his )ingers! and brandishing his 'rabstic ! made directly to the "lace whence the Voice issued; and the .an of 'ourage made as much Expedition towards his own (ome! whither he escaped in a very short time without once loo ing behind him- where we will leave him! to contemplate his own 1ravery! and to censure the want of it in others; and return to the good Adams, who! on coming up to the "lace whence the /oise proceeded! found a #oman struggling with a .an! who had thrown her on the 4round! and had almost overpowered her. %he great Abilities of .r. Adams were not necessary to have formed a right ?udgment of this Affair! on the first sight. (e did not therefore want the Entreaties of the poor #retch to assist her! but lifting up his 'rabstic ! he immediately levelled a 1low at that "art of the Ravisher+s (ead! where! according to the ,pinion of the Ancients! the 1rains of some "ersons are deposited! and which he had undoubtedly let forth! had not /ature! 8who! as wise .en have observed! equips all 'reatures with what is most expedient for them;9 ta en a provident 'are! 8as she always doth with those she intends for Encounters9 to ma e this part of the (ead three times as thic as those of ordinary .en! who are designed to exercise %alents which are vulgarly called rational! and for whom! as 1rains are necessary! she is obliged to leave some room for them in the 'avity of the * ull- whereas! those Ingredients being entirely useless to "ersons of the heroic 'alling! she hath an ,pportunity of thic ening the 1one! so as to ma e it less sub7ect to any Impression or liable to be crac ed or bro en; and indeed! in some who are predestined to the 'ommand of Armies and Empires! she is supposed sometimes to ma e that "art perfectly solid. As a 4ame0'oc when engaged in amorous %oying with a (en! if perchance he espies another 'oc at hand! immediately quits his )emale! and opposes himself to his Rival; so did the Ravisher! on the Information of the 'rabstic ! immediately leap from the #oman! and hastened to assail the .an. (e had no #eapons but what /ature had furnished him with (owever! he clenched his )ist! and presently darted it at that "art of Adam*s 1reast where the (eart is lodged. Adams staggered at the Violence of the 1low! when throwing away his *taff! he li ewise clenched that )ist which we have before commemorated! and would have discharged it full in the 1reast of his Antagonist! had he not dexterously caught it with his left (and! at the same time darting his (ead; 8which some modern (eroes! of the lower 'lass! use li e the 1attering0Ram of the Ancients! for a #eapon of ,ffence; another Reason to admire the 'unningness of /ature! in composing it of those impenetrable .aterials9 dashing his (ead! I say; into the *tomach of Adams, he tumbled him on his 1ac ! and not having any regard to the $aws of (eroism! which would have restrained him from any farther

Attac on his Enemy! +till he was again on his $egs! he threw himself upon him! and laying hold on the 4round with his left (and! he with his right belaboured the 1ody of Adams +till he was weary! and indeed! +till he concluded 8to use the $anguage of fighting9 that he had done his 1usiness; or! in the $anguage of "oetry! that he had sent him to the *hades below; in plain &nglish, that he was dead. 1ut Adams, who was no 'hic en! and could bear a drubbing as well as any boxing 'hampion in the @niverse! lay still only to watch his ,pportunity; and now perceiving his Antagonist to pant with his $abours! he exerted his utmost )orce at once! and with such *uccess! that he overturned him and became his *uperiour; when fixing one of his 2nees in his 1reast! he cried out in an exulting Voice! .t is my turn nowand after a few .inutes constant Application! he gave him so dextrous a 1low 7ust under his 'hin! that the )ellow no longer retained any .otion! and Adams began to fear he had struc him once too often; for he often asserted! :he should be concerned to have the 1lood of even the #ic ed upon him.: Adams got up! and called aloud to the young #oman!<:1e of good cheer! &amsel! said he! you are no longer in danger of your Ravisher! who! I am terribly afraid! lies dead at my )eet; but 4< forgive me what I have done in &efence of Innocence.: %he poor #retch! who had been some time in recovering *trength enough to rise! and had afterwards! during the Engagement! stood trembling! being disabled by )ear! even from running away! hearing her 'hampion was victorious! came up to him! but not without Apprehensions! even of her &eliverer; which! however! she was soon relieved from! by his courteous 1ehaviour and gentle #ords. %hey were both standing by the 1ody! which lay motionless on the 4round! and which Adams wished to see stir much more than the #oman did! when he earnestly begged her to tell him :by what .isfortune she came! at such a time of /ight! into so lonely a "lace=: *he acquainted him! :she was travelling towards London, and had accidentally met with the "erson from whom he had delivered her! who told her he was li ewise on his ?ourney to the same "lace! and would eep her 'ompany; an ,ffer which! suspecting no harm! she had accepted; that he told her! they were at a small distance from an Inn where she might ta e up her $odging that Evening! and he would show her a nearer way to it than by following the Road. %hat if she had suspected him! 8which she did not! he spo e so indly to her!9 being alone on these &owns in the dar ! she had no human .eans to avoid him; that therefore she put her whole %rust in "rovidence! and wal +d on! expecting every .oment to arrive at the Inn; when! on a sudden! being come to those 1ushes! he desired her to stop! and after some rude 2isses! which she resisted! and some Entreaties! which she re7ected! he laid violent hands on her! and was attempting to execute his wic ed #ill! when! she than ed 4<! he timely came up and prevented him.: Adams encouraged her for saying! she had put her whole %rust in "rovidence! and told her :(e doubted not but "rovidence had sent him to her &eliverance! as a Reward for that %rust. (e wished indeed he had not deprived the wic ed #retch of $ife! but 4<+s #ill be done; he said! he hoped the 4oodness of his Intention would excuse him in the next #orld! and he trusted in her Evidence to acquit him in this.: (e was then silent! and began to consider with himself! whether it would be properer to ma e his Escape! or to deliver himself into the hands of ?ustice; which .editation ended! as the Reader will see in the next 'hapter. '(A". C. #iving an Account of the strange Catastrophe of the preceding Adventure, which drew poor Adams into fresh Calamities; and who the Woman was who owed the Preservation of her Chastity to his victorious Arm. #hilst Adams was wisely weighing in his .ind the ,b7ections which might be made to either of these two .ethods of proceeding! his ?udgment sometimes inclining to the one and sometimes to the other; for both seemed to him so equally adviseable! and so equally dangerous! that probably he would have ended his &ays! at least two or three of them! on that very *pot! before he had ta en any Resolution; he lifted up his Eyes! and spied a $ight at a distance! to which he instantly addressed himself with 1eus tu, (raveller, heus tuB (e presently heard several Voices! and perceived the $ight approaching toward him. %he "ersons who attended the $ight began some to laugh! others to sing! and others to hollow! at which the #oman testified some )ear! but Adams said! :1e of good cheer! &amsel! and repose thy %rust in the same "rovidence! which hath hitherto protected thee! and never will forsa e the Innocent.: %hese "eople who now approached were no other! Reader! than a *et of young )ellows! who came to these 1ushes in pursuit of a &iversion which they

call %ird,batting. %his! if thou art ignorant of it 8as perhaps if thou hast never travelled beyond 0ensington, .slington, 1ac"ney, or the %orough, thou mayst be9 I will inform thee! is performed by holding a large 'lap0 /et before a $anthorn! and at the same time! beating the 1ushes- for the 1irds! when they are disturbed from their "laces of Rest! or Roost! immediately ma e to the $ight! and so are enticed within the /et. Adams immediately told them! what had happened! and desired them! :to hold the $anthorn to the )ace of the .an on the ground! for he feared he had smote him fatally.: 1ut indeed his )ears were frivolous! for the )ellow! though he had been stunned by the last 1low he received! had long since recovered his *enses! and finding himself quit of Adams, had listened attentively to the &iscourse between him and the young #oman; for whose &eparture he had patiently waited! that he might li ewise withdraw himself! having no longer (opes of succeeding in his &esires! which were moreover almost as well cooled by .r. Adams, as they could have been by the young #oman herself! had he obtained his utmost #ish. %his )ellow! who had a Readiness at improving any Accident! thought he might now play a better part than that of a dead .an; and accordingly! the moment the 'andle was held to his )ace! he leapt up! and laying hold on Adams, cried out! :/o! Villain! I am not dead! though you and your wic ed #hore might well thin me so! after the barbarous 'ruelties you have exercised on me. 4entlemen!: said he! :you are luc ily come to the Assistance of a poor %raveller! who would otherwise have been robbed and murdered by this vile .an and #oman! who led me hither out of my way from the (igh0Road! and both falling on me have used me as you see.: Adams was going to answer! when one of the young )ellows! cry+d! :&<n them! let+s carry them both before the ?ustice.: %he poor woman began to tremble! and Adams lifted up his Voice! but in vain. %hree or four of them laid hands on him! and one holding the $anthorn to his )ace! they all agreed! he had the most villainous Countenance they ever beheld! and an Attorney+s 'ler who was of the 'ompany declared! he was sure he had remembered him at the %ar. As to the #oman! her (air was dishevelled in the *truggle! and her /ose had bled! so that they could not perceive whether she was handsome or ugly- but they said her )right plainly discovered her 4uilt. And searching her "oc ets! as they did those of Adams for .oney! which the )ellow said he had lost! they found in her "oc et a "urse with some 4old in it! which abundantly convinced them! especially as the )ellow offered to swear to it. .r. Adams was found to have no more than one (alfpenny about him. %his the 'ler said! :was a great "resumption that he was an old ,ffender! by cunningly giving all the 1ooty to the #oman.: %o which all the rest readily assented. %his Accident promising them better *port! than what they had proposed! they quitted their Intention of catching 1irds! and unanimously resolved to proceed to the ?ustice with the ,ffenders. 1eing informed what a desperate )ellow Adams was! they tied his (ands behind him! and having hid their /ets among the 1ushes! and the $anthorn being carried before them! they placed the two "risoners in their )ront! and then began their .arch- Adams not only submitting patiently to his own )ate! but comforting and encouraging his 'ompanion under her *ufferings. #hilst they were on their way! the 'ler informed the rest! that this Adventure would prove a very beneficial one- for that they would be all entitled to their "roportions of KI l. for apprehending the Robbers. %his occasion+d a 'ontention concerning the "arts which they had severally born in ta ing them; one insisting! :he ought to have the greatest *hare! for he had first laid his (ands on Adams ;: another claiming a superiour "art for having first held the $anthorn to the .an+s )ace! on the 4round! by which! he said! :the whole was discovered.: %he 'ler claimed four fifths of the Reward! for having proposed to search the "risoners; and li ewise the carrying them before the ?ustice- he said indeed! :in strict ?ustice he ought to have the whole.: %hese 'laims however they at last consented to refer to a future &ecision! but seem+d all to agree that the 'ler was intitled to a .oiety. %hey then debated what .oney should be allotted to the young )ellow! who had been employed only in holding the /ets. (e very modestly said! :that he did not apprehend any large "roportion would fall to his share; but hoped they would allow him something- he desired them to consider! that they had assigned their /ets to his 'are! which prevented him from being as forward as any in laying hold of the Robbers! 8for so these innocent "eople were called;9 that if he had not occupied the /ets! some other must; concluding however that he should be contented with the smallest *hare imaginable! and should thin that rather their 1ounty than his .erit:. 1ut they were all unanimous in excluding him from any "art whatever! the 'ler particularly swearing! :if they gave him a *hilling! they might do what they pleased with the rest; for he would not concern himself with the Affair.: %his 'ontention was so hot! and so totally

engaged the Attention of all the "arties! that Attention of all the "arties! that a dextrous nimble %hief! had he been in .r. Adams*s situation! would have ta en care to have given the ?ustice no %rouble that Evening. Indeed it required not the Art of a 'hepherd to escape! especially as the &ar ness of the /ight would have so much befriended him- but Adams trusted rather to his Innocence than his (eels! and without thin ing of )light! which was easy! or Resistance 8which was impossible! as there were six lusty young )ellows! besides the Villain himself! present9 he wal ed with perfect Resignation the way they thought proper to conduct him. Adams frequently vented himself in E7aculations during their ?ourney; at last poor !oseph Andrews occurring to his .ind! he could not refrain sighing forth his /ame! which being heard by his 'ompanion in Affliction! she cried! with some Vehemence! :*ure I should now that Voice! you cannot certainly! *ir! be .r. Abraham Adams=: :Indeed &amsel!: says he! :that is my /ame; there is something also in your Voice! which persuades me I have heard it before.: :$a! *ir!: says she! :don+t you remember poor -anny=: (ow -annyB: answered Adams, :indeed I very well remember you; what can have brought you hither.: :I have told you *ir!: replied she! :I was travelling towards London; but I thought you mentioned !oseph Andrews, pray what is become of him=: :I left him! 'hild! this Afternoon: said Adams, :in the *tage0'oach! in his way towards our "arish! whither he is going to see you.: :%o see me= :$a! *ir!: answered -anny, :sure you 7eer me; what should he be going to see me for=: :'an you as that!: replied Adams= :I hope -anny you are not inconstant; I assure you he deserves much better of you.: :$aB .r. Adams,: said she! :what is .r. !oseph to me= I am sure I never had any thing to say to him! but as one )ellow0*ervant might to another.: :I am sorry to hear this!: said Adams, :a vertuous "assion for a young .an! is what no #oman need be ashamed of. Aou either do not tell me %ruth! or you are false to a very worthy .an.: Adams then told her what had happened at the Inn! to which she listened very attentively; and a *igh often escaped from her! notwithstanding her utmost Endeavours to the contrary! nor could she prevent herself from as ing a thousand >uestions! which would have assured any one but Adams, who never saw farther into "eople than they desired to let him! of the %ruth of a "assion she endeavoured to conceal. Indeed the )act was! that this poor 4irl having heard of !oseph*s .isfortune by some of the *ervants belonging to that 'oach! which we have formerly mentioned to have stopped at the Inn while the poor Aouth was confined to his 1ed! that instant abandoned the 'ow she was mil ing! and ta ing with her a little 1undle of 'lothes under her Arm! and all the .oney she was worth in her own "urse! without consulting any one! immediately set forward! in pursuit of ,ne! whom! notwithstanding her shyness to the "arson! she loved with inexpressible Violence! though with the purest and most delicate "assion. %his *hyness therefore! as we trust it will recommend her 'haracter to all our )emale Readers! and not greatly surpri5e such of our .ales as are well acquainted with the younger part of the other *ex! we shall not give our selves any trouble to vindicate. '(A". CI. What happened to them while before the !ustice. A Chapter very full of Learning. %heir )ellow0%ravellers were so engaged in the hot &ispute concerning the &ivision of the Reward for apprehending these innocent "eople! that they attended very little to their &iscourse. %hey were now arrived at the ?ustice+s (ouse! and sent one of his *ervants in to acquaint his #orship! that they had ta en two Robbers! and brought them before him. %he ?ustice! who was 7ust returned from a )ox0'hace! and had not yet finished his &inner! ordered them to carry the "risoners into the *table! whither they were attended by all the *ervants in the (ouse! and all the "eople of the /eighbourhood! who floc +d together to see them with as much 'uriosity as if there was something uncommon to be seen! or that a Rogue did not loo li e other "eople. %he ?ustice being now in the height of his .irth and his 'ups! bethought himself of the "risoners! and telling his 'ompany he believed they should have good *port in their Examination! he ordered them into his "resence. %hey had no sooner entered the Room! than he began to revile them! saying! :that Robberies on the (ighway were now grown so frequent! that "eople could not sleep safely in their 1eds! and assured them they both should be made Examples of at the ensuing Assi5es.: After he had gone on some time in this manner! he was reminded byBby his 'ler ! :that it would be proper to ta e the &eposition of the #itnesses against them.: #hich he bid him do! and he would light his "ipe in the mean time. #hilst the 'ler was

employed in writing down the &epositions of the )ellow who had pretended to be robbed! the ?ustice employed himself in crac ing ?ests on poor -anny, in which he was seconded by all the 'ompany at %able. ,ne as ed! :whether she was to be indicted for a 1ighwayman=: Another whispered in her Ear! :if she had not provided herself a great 1elly! he was at her service.: A third said! :he warranted she was a Relation of (urpis.: %o which one of the 'ompany! a great #it! sha ing his (ead and then his *ides! answered! :he believed she was nearer related to (urpis;: at which there was an universal $augh. %hey were proceeding thus with the poor 4irl! when somebody smoa ing the 'assoc ! peeping forth from under the 4reat 'oat of Adams, cried out! :#hat have we here! a "arson=: :(ow! *irrah!: says the ?ustice! :do you go a robbing in the &ress of a 'lergyman= let me tell you! your (abit will not entitle you to the %enefit of the Clergy.: :Aes!: said the witty )ellow! :he will have one 1enefit of 'lergy! he will be exalted above the (eads of the "eople!: at which there was a second $augh. And now the witty *par ! seeing his ?o es ta e! began to rise in *pirits; and turning to Adams, challenged him to cap Verses! and provo ing him by giving the first 1low! he repeated! $olle meum levibus cord est vilebile (elis. @pon which Adams, with a $oo full of ineffable 'ontempt! told him! he deserved scourging for his "ronuntiation. %he witty )ellow answered! :#hat do you deserve! &octor! for not being able to answer the first time=: #hy I+ll give you one you 1loc head<with an '= 'i licet, ut fulvum spectatur in igdibus haurum. #hat can+st not with an $ neither= %hou art a pretty )ellow for a "arson<. #hy did+st not steal some of the "arson+s Latin as well as his 4own. Another at the %able then answered! :if he had! you would have been too hard for him; I remember you at the 'ollege a very &evil at this *port! I have seen you catch a fresh .an- for no body that new you! would engage with you.: :I have forgot those things now!: cried the #it! :I believe I could have done pretty well formerly. <$et+s see! what did I end with<an $ again<ay< $ars, %acchus, Apollo, virorum. :I could have done it once.: <AhB evil betide you! and so you can now!: said the other! :no body in this 'ounty will underta e you.: Adams could hold no longer; :)riend!: said he! :I have a 1oy not above eight Aears old! who would instruct thee! that the last Verse runs thusDt sunt )ivorum, $ars, %acchus, Apollo, virorum. :I+ll hold thee a 4uinea of that!: said the #it! throwing the .oney on the %able. <:And I+ll go your halves!: cries the other.: :&one!: answered Adams, but upon applying to his "oc et! he was forced to retract! and own he had no .oney about him; which set them all a laughing! and confirmed the %riumph of his Adversary! which was not moderate! any more than the Approbation he met with from the whole 'ompany! who told Adams he must go a little longer to *chool! before he attempted to attac that 4entleman in Latin. %he 'ler having finished the &epositions! as well of the )ellow himself! as of those who apprehended the "risoners! delivered them to the ?ustice; who having sworn the several #itnesses! without reading a *yllable! ordered his 'ler to ma e the $ittimus. Adams then said! :he hoped he should not be condemned unheard.: :/o! no!: cries the ?ustice! :you will be as ed what you have to say for your self! when you come on your %rial! we are not trying you now; I shall only commit you to 4oal- if you can prove your Innocence at 'i2e, you will be found .gnoramus, and so no (arm done.: :Is it no "unishment! *ir! for an innocent .an to lie several .onths in 4oal=: cries Adams- I beg you would at least hear me before you sign the $ittimus.: :#hat signifies all you can say!:= says the ?ustice! :is it not here in blac and white against you= I must tell you! you are a very impertinent )ellow! to ta e up so much of my time. <*o ma e haste with his $ittimus.:

,ne of the 'ompany having loo ed stedfastly at Adams, as ed him! :if he did not now $ady %ooby=: @pon which Adams presently calling him to mind! answered in a Rapture! :, *quire! are you there= I believe you will inform his #orship I am innocent.: :I can indeed say!: replied the *quire! :that I am very much surpri5ed to see you in this *ituation;: and then addressing himself to the ?ustice! he said! :*ir! I assure you .r. Adams is a 'lergyman as he appears! and a 4entleman of a very good 'haracter. I wish you would enquire a little farther into this Affair- for I am convinced of his Innocence.: :/ay!: says the ?ustice! :if he is a 4entleman! and you are sure he is innocent! I don+t desire to commit him! not I; I will commit the #oman by herself! and ta e your 1ail for the 4entleman; loo into the 1oo ! 'ler ! and see how it is to ta e 1ail; come<and ma e the .ittimus for the Woman as fast as you can.: :*ir!: cries Adams, :I assure you she is as innocent as myself.: :"erhaps!: said the *quire! :there may be some .ista e; pray let us hear .r. Adams*s Relation.: :#ith all my heart!: answered the ?ustice! :and give the 4entleman a 4lass to whet his #histle before he begins. I now how to behave myself to 4entlemen as well as another. /o body can say I have committed a 4entleman since I have been in the 'ommission.: Adams then began the /arrative! in which! though he was very prolix! he was uninterrupted too! unless by several 1ums and 1a*s of the ?ustice! and his &esire to repeat those "arts which seemed to him most material. #hen he had finished; the ?ustice! who! on what the *quire had said! believed every *yllable of his *tory on his bare Affirmation! notwithstanding the &epositions on ,ath to the contrary! began to let loose several Rogues and Rascals against the #itness! whom he ordered to stand forth! but in vain- the said #itness! long since finding what turn .atters were li e to ta e! had privily withdrawn! without attending the Issue. %he ?ustice now flew into a violent "assion! and was hardly prevailed with not to commit the innocent )ellows! who had been imposed on as well as himself. (e swore! :they had best find out the )ellow who was guilty of "er7ury! and bring him before him within two &ays; or he would bind them all over to their good 1ehaviour.: %hey all promised to use their best Endeavours to that purpose! and were dismissed. %hen the ?ustice insisted! that .r. Adams should sit down and ta e a 4lass with him. As for -anny, she was! at her own Request! recommended to the 'are of a .aid0 *ervant of the (ouse! who helped her to new dress! and clean herself. %he 'ompany in the "arlour had not been long seated! before they were alarmed with a horrible @proar from without! where the "ersons who had apprehended Adams and -anny, had been regaling! according to the 'ustom of the (ouse! with the ?ustice+s *trong 1eer. %hese were all fallen together by the Ears! and were cuffing each other without any .ercy. %he ?ustice himself sallied out! and with the &ignity of his "resence! soon put an end to the )ray. ,n his return into the "arlour! he reported! %hat the ,ccasion of the >uarrel! was no other than a &ispute! to whom! if dams had been convicted! the greater *hare of the Reward for apprehending him had belonged.: All the 'ompany laughed at this! except Adams, who ta ing his "ipe from his .outh fetched a deep 4roan! and said! he was concerned to see so litigious a %emper in .en. %hat he remembered a *tory something li e it in one of the "arishes where his 'ure lay- :%here was!: continued he! :a 'ompetition between three young )ellows! for the "lace of the 'ler ! which I disposed of! to the best of my Abilities! according to .erit- that is! I gave it to him who had the happiest 2nac at setting a "salm. %he 'ler was no sooner established in his "lace! than a 'ontention began between the two disappointed 'andidates! concerning their Excellence! each contending! they two only had been the 'ompetitors on whom my Election would have fallen. %his &ispute frequently disturbed the 'ongregation! and introduced a &iscord into the "salmody! +till I was forced to silence them both. 1ut alas! the litigious *pirit could not be stifled; and being no longer able to vent itself in singing! it now bro e forth in fighting. It produced many 1attles! 8for they were very near a .atch;9 and! I believe! would have ended fatally! had not the &eath of the 'ler given me an ,pportunity to promote one of them to his "lace; which presently put an end to the &ispute! and entirely reconciled the contending "arties.: Adams then proceeded to ma e some "hilosophical ,bservations on the )olly of growing warm in &isputes! in which neither "arty is interested. (e then applied himself vigorously to smoa ing; and a long *ilence ensued! which was at length bro en by the ?ustice; who began to sing forth his own "raises! and to value himself exceedingly on his nice &iscernment in the 'ause! which had lately been before him. (e was quic ly interrupted by .r. Adams, between whom and his #orship a &ispute now arose! whether he ought not! in strictness of $aw! to have committed him! the said Adams; in which the latter maintained he ought to have been committed! and the ?ustice as vehemently held he ought not. %his had most probably produced a >uarrel! 8for both were very violent and positive in their

,pinions9 had not -anny accidentally heard! that a young )ellow was going from the ?ustice+s (ouse! to the very Inn where the *tage0'oach in which !oseph was! put up. @pon this /ews! she immediately sent for the "arson out of the "arlour. Adams, when he found her resolute to go! 8tho+ she would not own the Reason! but pretended she could not bear to see the )aces of those who had suspected her of such a 'rime!9 was as fully determined to go with her; he accordingly too leave of the ?ustice and 'ompany! and so ended a &ispute! in which the $aw seemed shamefully to intend to set a .agistrate and a &ivine together by the ears. '(A". CII. A very delightful Adventure, as well to the Parlour concerned as to the good,natur*d 7eader. Adams, -anny, and the 4uide set out together! about one in the .orning! the .oon then 7ust being risen. %hey had not gone above a .ile! before a most violent *torm of Rain obliged them to ta e shelter in an Inn! or rather Alehouse; where Adams immediately procured himself a good )ire! a %oast and Ale! and a "ipe! and began to smo e with great 'ontent! utterly forgetting every thing that had happened. )anny sat li ewise down by the )ire; but was much more impatient at the *torm. *he presently engaged the Eyes of the (ost! his #ife! the .aid of the (ouse! and the young )ellow who was their 4uide; they all conceived they had never seen any thing half so handsome; and indeed! Reader! if thou art of an amorous (ue! I advise thee to s ip over the next "aragraph; which to render our (istory perfect! we are obliged to set down! humbly hoping! that we may escape the )ate of Pygmalion- for if it should happen to us or to thee to be struc with this "icture! we should be perhaps in as helpless a 'ondition as arcissus; and might say to ourselves! Euod petis est nusBuam . ,r if the finest )eatures in it should set a $ady<+s Image before our Eyes! we should be still in as bad *ituation! and might say to our &esires! C9lum ipsum petimus stultitia. )anny was now in the nineteenth Aear of her Age; she was tall and delicately shaped; but not one of those slender young #omen! who seem rather intended to hang up in the (all of an Anatomist! than for any other "urpose. ,n the contrary! she was so plump! that she seemed bursting through her tight *tays! especially in the "art which confined her swelling 1reasts. /or did her (ips want the Assistance of a (oop to extend them. %he exact *hape of her Arms! denoted the )orm of those $imbs which she concealed; and tho+ they were a little redden+d by her $abour! yet if her *leeve slipt above her Elbow! or her (and erchief discovered any part of her /ec ! a #hiteness appeared which the finest .talian "aint would be unable to reach. (er (air was of a 'hesnut 1rown! and /ature had been extremely lavish to her of it! which she had cut! and on 'undays used to curl down her /ec in the modern )ashion. (er )orehead was high! her Eye0brows arched! and rather full than otherwise. (er Eyes blac and spar ling; her /ose! 7ust inclining to the 7oman; her $ips red and moist! and her @nder0$ip! according to the ,pinion of the $adies! too pouting. (er %eeth were white! but not exactly even. %he *mall0"ox had left one only .ar on her 'hin! which was so large! it might have been mista en for a &imple! had not her left 'hee produced one so near a /eighbour to it! that the former served only for a )oil to the latter. (er 'omplexion was fair! a little in7ured by the *un! but overspread with such a 1loom! that the finest $adies would have exchanged all their #hite for it- add to these! a 'ountenance in which tho+ she was extremely bashful! a *ensibility appeared almost incredible; and a *weetness! whenever she smiled! beyond either Imitation or &escription. %o conclude all! she had a natural 4entility! superior to the Acquisition of Art! and which surpri5ed all who beheld her. %his lovely 'reature was sitting by the )ire with Adams, when her Attention was suddenly engaged by a Voice from an inner Room! which sung the following *ong%he *,/4. 'ay, Chloe, where must the 'wain stray Who is by thy %eauties undone, (o wash their 7emembrance away, (o what distant Lethe must run3 (he Wretch who is sentenc*d to die,

$ay escape and leave !ustice behind; -rom his Country perhaps he may fly, %ut O can he fly from his $ind5 O 7apture5 unthought of before, (o be thus of Chloe possest; or she, nor no (yrant*s hard Power, 1er .mage can tear from my %reast. %ut felt not arcissus more !oy, With his &yes be beheld his lov*d Charms3 4et what he beheld, the fond %oy $ore eagerly wish*d in his Arms. 1ow can it thy dear .mage be, Which fills thus my %osom with Woe3 Can aught bear 7esemblance to thee, Which #rief and not !oy can bestow3 (his Counterfeit snatch from my 1eart, 4e Pow*rs, tho* with (orment . rave, (ho* mortal will prove the fell 'mart, . then shall find rest in my #rave. Ah5 see, the dear ymph o*er the Plain, Comes smiling and tripping along, A thousand Loves dance in her (rain, (he #races around her all throng. (o meet her soft >ephyrus flies, And wafts all the 'weets from the -low*rs Ah 7ogue5 whilst he "isses her &yes, $ore 'weets from her %reath he devours. $y 'oul, whilst . ga2e, is on fire, %ut her Loo"s were so tender and "ind, $y 1ope almost reach*d my )esire, And left lame )espair far behind. (ransported with $adness . flew, And eagerly sei2*d on my %liss; 1er %osom but half she withdrew, %ut half she refus*d my fond 0iss. Advances li"e these made me bold, . whisper*d her, Love,;we*re alone, (he rest let .mmortals unfold, o Language can tell but their own. Ah5 Chloe, e8piring, . cry*d, 1ow long . thy Cruelty bore3 Ah5 'trephon, she blushing reply*d, 4ou ne*er was so pressing before. Adams had been ruminating all this %ime on a "assage in Cschylus, without attending in the least to the Voice! tho+ one of the most melodious that ever was heard; when casting his Eyes on -anny, he cried out! :1less us! you loo extremely pale.: "aleB .r. Adams, says she! , ?esusB and fell bac wards in her 'hair.

Adams 7umped up! flung his Cschylus into the )ire! and fell a roaring to the "eople of the (ouse for (elp. (e soon summoned every one into the Room! and the *ongster among the rest- 1ut! , Reader! when this /ightingale! who was no other than !oseph Andrews himself! saw his beloved -anny in the *ituation we have described her! can+st thou conceive the Agitations of his .ind= If thou can+st not! wave that .editation to behold his (appiness! when clasping her in his Arms! he found $ife and 1lood returning into her 'hee s; when he saw her open her beloved Eyes! and heard her with the softest Accent whisper! :Are you !oseph Andrews=: :Art thou my -anny=: he answered eagerly! and pulling her to his (eart! he imprinted numberless 2isses on her $ips! without considering who were present. If "rudes are offended at the $usciousness of this "icture! they may ta e their Eyes off from it! and survey "arson Adams dancing about the Room in a Rapture of ?oy. *ome "hilosophers may perhaps doubt! whether he was not the happiest of the three; for the 4oodness of his (eart en7oyed the 1lessings which were exulting in the 1reasts of both the other two! together with his own. 1ut we shall leave such &isquisitions as too deep for us! to those who are building some favourite (ypotheses! which they will refuse no .etaphysical Rubbish to erect! and support- for our part! we give it clearly on the side of !oseph, whose (appiness was not only greater than the "arson+s! but of longer &uration- for as soon as the first %umults of Adams*s Rapture were over! he cast his Eyes towards the )ire! where Cschylus lay expiring; and immediately rescued the poor Remains! to0wit! the *heep0s in 'overing of his dear )riend! who had been his inseparable 'ompanion for upwards of thirty Aears. )anny had no sooner perfectly recovered herself! than she began to restrain the Impetuosity of her %ransports; and reflecting on what she had done and suffered in the "resence of so many! she was immediately covered with 'onfusion; and pushing !oseph gently from her! she begged him to be quiet- nor would admit of either 2iss or Embrace any longer. %hen seeing .rs. 'lipslop she curt+sied! and offered to advance to her; but that high #oman would not return her 'urt+sies; but casting her Eyes another way! she immediately withdrew into another Room! muttering as she went! she wondered who the Creature was. '(A". CIII. A )issertation concerning high People and low People, with $rs. 'lipslop*s )eparture in no very good (emper of $ind, and the evil Plight in which she left Adams and his Company. It will doubtless seem extremely odd to many Readers! that .rs. 'lipslop, who had lived several Aears in the same (ouse with -anny, should in a short *eparation utterly forget her. And indeed the truth is! that she remembered her very well. As we would not willingly therefore! that any thing should appear unnatural in this our (istory! we will endeavour to explain the Reasons of this her 'onduct; nor do we doubt being able to satisfy the most curious Reader! that .rs. 'lipslop did not in the least deviate from the common Road in this 1ehaviour; and indeed! had she done otherwise! she must have descended below herself! and would have very 7ustly been liable to 'ensure. 1e it nown then! that the human *pecies are divided into two sorts of "eople! to0wit! 1igh "eople and Low "eople. As by (igh "eople! I would not be understood to mean "ersons literally born higher in their &imensions than the rest of the *pecies! nor metaphorically those of exalted 'haracters or Abilities; so by low "eople I cannot be construed to intend the Reverse. (igh "eople signify no other than "eople of )ashion! and low "eople those of no )ashion. /ow this word -ashion, hath by long use lost its original .eaning! from which at present it gives us a very different Idea- for I am deceived! if by "ersons of )ashion! we do not generally include a 'onception of 1irth and Accomplishments superior to the (erd of .an ind; whereas in reality! nothing more was originally meant by a "erson of )ashion! than a "erson who drest himself in the )ashion of the %imes; and the #ord really and truly signifies no more at this day. /ow the #orld being thus divided into "eople of )ashion! and "eople of no )ashion! a fierce 'ontention arose between them! nor would those of one "arty! to avoid *uspicion! be seen public ly to spea to those of the other; tho+ they; often held a very good 'orrespondence in private. In this 'ontention! it is difficult to say which "arty succeeded- for whilst the "eople of )ashion sei5ed several "laces to their own use! such as 'ourts! Assemblies! ,peras! 1alls! :c. the "eople of no )ashion! besides one Royal "lace called his .a7esty+s 1ear04arden! have been in constant "ossession of all (ops! )airs! Revels! :c. %wo "laces have been agreed to be divided between

them! namely the 'hurch and the "lay0(ouse; where they segregate themselves from each other in a remar able .anner- for as the "eople of )ashion exalt themselves at 'hurch over the (eads of the "eople of no )ashion; so in the "lay0(ouse they abase themselves in the same degree under their )eet. %his &istinction I have never met with any one able to account for; it is sufficient! that so far from loo ing on each other as 1rethren in the 'hristian $anguage! they seem scarce to regard each other as of the same *pecies. %his the %erms strange Persons, People one does not "now, the Creature, Wretches, %easts, %rutes, and many other Appellations evidently demonstrate; which .rs. 'lipslop having often heard her .istress use! thought she had also a Right to use in her turn- and perhaps she was not mista en; for these two "arties! especially those bordering nearly on each other! to0wit the lowest of the (igh! and the highest of the $ow! often change their "arties according to "lace and %ime; for those who are "eople of )ashion in one place! are often "eople of no )ashion in another- And with regard to %ime! it may not be unpleasant to survey the "icture of &ependance li e a ind of $adder; as for instance! early in the .orning arises the "ostillion! or some other 1oy which great )amilies no more than great *hips are without! and falls to brushing the 'lothes! and cleaning the *hoes of !ohn the )ootman! who being drest himself! applies his (ands to the same $abours for .r. 'econd,hand the *quire+s 4entleman; the 4entleman in the li e manner! a little later in the &ay! attends the *quire; the *quire is no sooner equipped! than he attends the $evee of my $ord; which is no sooner over! than my $ord himself is seen at the $evee of the )avourite! who after his (our of (omage is at an end! appears himself to pay (omage to the $evee of his *overeign. /or is there perhaps! in this whole $adder of &ependance! any one *tep at a greater distance from the other! than the first from the second- so that to a "hilosopher the >uestion might only seem whether you would chuse to be a great .an at six in the .orning! or at twelve. And yet there are scarce two of these! who do not thin the least )amiliarity with the "ersons below them a 'ondescension! and if they were to go one *tep farther! a &egradation. And now! Reader! I hope thou wilt pardon this long &igression! which seemed to me necessary to vindicate the great 'haracter of .rs. 'lipslop, from what low "eople! who have never seen high "eople might thin an Absurdity- but we who now them! must have daily found very high "ersons now us in one "lace and not in another! %o0day! and not %o0morrow; for all which! it is difficult to account for! otherwise than I have here endeavour+d; and perhaps! if the 4ods! according to the ,pinion of some! made .en only to laugh at them! there is no part of our 1ehaviour which answers the End of our 'reation better than this. 1ut to return to our (istory- Adams, who new no more of all this than the 'at which sat on the %able! imagining .rs. 'lipslop*s .emory had been much worse than it really was! followed her into the next Room! crying out! :.adam 'lipslop, here is one of your old Acquaintance- &o but see what a fine #oman she is grown since she left $ady %ooby*s *ervice.: :I thin I reflect something of her!: answered she with great &ignity! :but I can+t remember all the inferior *ervants in our )amily.: *he then proceeded to satisfy Adams*s 'uriosity! by telling him! :when she arrived at the Inn! she found a 'haise ready for her; that her $ady being expected very shortly in the 'ountry! she was obliged to ma e the utmost haste! and in Commensuration of !oseph*s $ameness! she had ta en him with her;: and lastly! :that the excessive Violence of the *torm had driven them into the (ouse where he found them.: After which! she acquainted Adams with his having left his (orse! and exprest some #onder at his having strayed so far out of his #ay! and at meeting him! as she said! :in the 'ompany of that #ench! who she feared was no better than she should be.: %he (orse was no sooner put into Adams*s (ead! but he was immediately driven out by this Reflection on the 'haracter of -anny . (e protested! :he believed there was not a chaster &amsel in the @niverse. I heartily wish! I heartily wish!: cry+d he! 8snapping his )ingers9 :that all her 1etters were as good.: (e then proceeded to inform her of the Accident of their meeting; but when he came to mention the 'ircumstance of delivering her from the Rape! she said! :she thought him properer for the Army than the 'lergy- that it did not become a 'lergyman to lay violent (ands on any one! that he should have rather prayed that she might be strengthened.: Adams said! :he was very far from being ashamed of what he had done;: she replied! :want of *hame was not the Currycuristic" of a 'lergyman.: %his &ialogue might have probably grown warmer! had not !oseph opportunely entered the Room! to as leave of .adam 'lipslop to introduce -anny- but she positively refused to admit any such %rollops; and told him! :she would have been burnt before she would have suffered him to get into a 'haise with her; if she had once respected him of having his *luts way laid on the Road for him!: adding! :that .r. Adams acted a very pretty "art! and she did not doubt but to see him a

1ishop.: (e made the best 1ow he could! and cried out! :I than you! .adam! for that Right Reverend Appellation! which I shall ta e all honest .eans to deserve.: :Very honest .eans!: returned she with a *neer! :to bring good "eople together.: At these #ords! Adams too two or three *trides a0cross the Room! when the 'oachman came to inform .rs. 'lipslop, :that the *torm was over! and the .oon shone very bright.: *he then sent for !oseph, who was sitting without with his -anny; and would have had him gone with her- but he peremptorily refused to leave -anny behind; which threw the good #oman into a violent Rage. *he said! :she would inform her $ady what &oings were carrying on! and did not doubt! but she would rid the "arish of all such "eople;: and concluded a long *peech full of 1itterness and very hard #ords! with some Reflections on the 'lergy! not decent to repeat- at last finding !oseph unmoveable! she flung herself into the 'haise! casting a $oo at -anny as she went! not unli e that which Cleopatra gives Octavia in the "lay. %o say the truth! she was most disagreeably disappointed by the "resence of -anny; she had from her first seeing !oseph at the Inn! conceived (opes of something which might have been accomplished at an Alehouse as well as a "alace; indeed it is probable! .r. Adams had rescued more than -anny from the &anger of a Rape that Evening. #hen the 'haise had carried off the enraged 'lipslop; Adams, !oseph, and -anny assembled over the )ire; where they had a great deal of innocent 'hat! pretty enough; but as possibly! it would not be very entertaining to the Reader! we shall hasten to the .orning; only observing that none of them went to bed that /ight. Adams, when he had smo ed three "ipes! too a comfortable /ap in a great 'hair! and left the $overs! whose Eyes were too well employed to permit any &esire of shutting them! to en7oy by themselves during some (ours! an (appiness which none of my Readers! who have never been in love! are capable of the least 'onception of! tho+ we had as many %ongues as 1omer had to describe it with! and which all true $overs will represent to their own .inds without the least Assistance from us. $et it suffice then to say! that -anny after a thousand Entreaties at last gave up her whole *oul to !oseph, and almost fainting in his Arms! with a *igh infinitely softer and sweeter too! than any Arabian 1ree5e! she whispered to his $ips! which were then close to hers! :, !oseph, you have won me; I will be yours for ever.: !oseph, having than ed her on his 2nees! and embraced her with an Eagerness! which she now almost returned! leapt up in a Rapture! and awa ened the "arson! earnestly begging him! :that he would that Instant 7oin their (ands together.: Adams rebu ed him for his Request! and told him! :he would by no means consent to any thing contrary to the )orms of the 'hurch! that he had no $icence! nor indeed would he advise him to obtain one. %hat the 'hurch had prescribed a )orm! namely the "ublication of 1anns! with which all good 'hristians ought to comply! and to the ,mission of which! he attributed the many .iseries which befel great )ol s in .arriage; concluding! As many as are =oined together otherwise than #;*s Word doth allow, are not =oined together by #;, neither is their $atrimony lawful .: -anny agreed with the "arson saying to !oseph with a 1lush! :she assured him she would not consent to any such thing! and that she wondred at his offering it.: In which Resolution she was comforted! and commended by Adams; and !oseph was obliged to wait patiently till after the third "ublication of the 1anns! which however! he obtained the 'onsent of -anny in the presence of Adams to put in at their Arrival. %he *un had been now risen some (ours! when !oseph finding his $eg surprisingly recovered! proposed to wal forwards; but when they were all ready to set out! an Accident a little retarded them. %his was no other than the Rec oning which amounted to seven *hillings; no great *um! if we consider the immense >uantity of Ale which .r. Adams poured in. Indeed they had no ,b7ection to the Reasonableness of the 1ill! but many to the "robability of paying it; for the )ellow who had ta en poor -anny*s "urse! had unluc ily forgot to return it. *o that the Account stood thus%hey stood silent some few .inutes! staring at each other! when Adams whipt out on his %oes! and as ed the (ostess :if there was no 'lergyman in that "aris=: *he answered! :there was.: :Is he wealthy=: replied he! to which she li ewise answered in the Affirmative. Adams then snapping his )ingers returned over7oyed to his 'ompanions! crying out! :Eure a! Eure a!: which not being understood! he told them in plain &nglish :they need give themselves no trouble; for he had a 1rother in the "arish! who would defray the Rec oning! and that he would 7ust step to his (ouse and fetch the .oney! and return to them instantly:.

'(A". CIV. An .nterview between Parson Adams and Parson (rulliber. "arson Adams came to the (ouse of "arson (rulliber, whom he sound stript into his #aistcoat! with an Apron on! and a "ail in his (and! 7ust come from serving his (ogs; for .r. (rulliber was a "arson on *undays! but all the other six might more properly be called a )armer. (e occupied a small piece of $and of his own! besides which he rented a considerable deal more. (is #ife mil ed his 'ows! waited in his &airy! and followed the .ar ets with 1utter and Eggs. %he (ogs fell chiefly to his care! which he carefully waited on at home! and attended to )airs; on which occasion he was liable to many ?o es! his own *i5e being with much Ale rendered little inferiour to that of the 1easts he sold. (e was indeed one of the largest .en you should see! and could have acted the part of *ir !ohn -alstaff without stuffing. Add to this! that the Rotundity of his 1elly was considerably increased by the shortness of his *tature! his *hadow ascending very near as far in height when he lay on his 1ac ! as when he stood on his $egs. (is Voice was loud and hoarse! and his Accents extremely broad; to complete the whole! he had a *tateliness in his 4ate! when he wal ed! not unli e that of a 4oose! only slower. .r. (rulliber being informed that somebody wanted to spea with him! immediately slipt off his Apron! and clothed himself in an old /ight04own! being the &ress in which he always saw his 'ompany at home. (is #ife who informed him of .r. Adams*s Arrival! had made a small .ista e; for she had told her (usband! :she believed he was a .an come for some of his (ogs.: %his *upposition made .r. (rulliber hasten with the utmost expedition to attend his 4uest; he no sooner saw Adams, than not in the least doubting the cause of his Errand to be what his #ife had imagined! he told him! :he was come in very good time; that he expected a &ealer that very Afternoon;: and added! :they were all pure and fat! and upwards of FI *core a piece.: Adams answered! :he believed he did not now him. Aes! yes!: cry+d (rulliber, :I have seen you often at -air; why! we have dealt before now mun! I warrant you; yes! yes!: cries he! :I remember thy )ace very well! but won+t mention a word more till you have seen them! tho+ I have never sold thee a )litch of such 1acon as is now in the *tye.: @pon which he laid violent (ands on Adams, and dragged him into the (ogs0 *tye! which was indeed but two *teps from his "arlour #indow. %hey were no sooner arrived there than he cry+d out! :&o but handle them! step in! )riend! art welcome to handle them whether dost buy or no.: At which words opening the 4ate! he pushed Adams into the "ig0*tye! insisting on it! that he should handle them! before he would tal one word with him. Adams, whose natural 'omplacence was beyond any artificial! was obliged to comply before he was suffered to explain himself! and laying hold on one of their %ails! the unruly 1east gave such a sudden spring! that he threw poor Adams all along in the .ire. (rulliber instead of assisting him to get up! burst into a $aughter! and entering the *tye! said to Adams with some contempt! Why, dost not "now how to handle a 1og- and was going to lay hold of one himself; but Adams, who thought he had carried his 'omplacence far enough! was no sooner on his $egs! than he escaped out of the Reach of the Animals! and cry+d out! nihil habeo cum Porcis- :I am a 'lergyman! *ir! and am not come to buy (ogs.: (rulliber answered! :he was sorry for the .ista e; but that he must blame his #ife;: adding! :she was a )ool! and always committed 1lunders.: (e then desired him to wal in and clean himself! that he would only fasten up the *tye and follow him. Adams desired leave to dry his 4reat 'oat! #ig! and (at by the )ire! which (rulliber granted. .rs. (rulliber would have brought him a 1ason of #ater to wash his )ace! but her (usband bid her be quiet li e a )ool as she was or she would commit more 1lunders! and then directed Adams to the "ump. #hile Adams was thus employed! (rulliber conceiving no great Respect for the Appearance of his 4uest! fastened the "arlour0&oor! and now conducted him into the 2itchin; telling him! he believed a 'up of &rin would do him no harm! and whispered his #ife to draw a little of the worst 'yder. After a short *ilence! Adams said! :I fancy! *ir! you already perceive me to be a 'lergyman.: :Ay! ay!: cries (rulliber grinning; I perceive you have some 'assoc ; I will not venture to call it a whole one.: Adams answered! :it was indeed none of the best; but he had the misfortune to tear it about ten Aears ago in passing over a *tile.: .rs. (rulliber returning with the &rin ! told her (usband :she fancied the 4entleman was a %raveller! and that he would be glad to eat a bit.: (rulliber bid her :hold her impertinent %ongue;: and as ed her :if "arsons used to travel without (orses= adding! he supposed the 4entleman had none by his having no 1oots on.: :Aes! *ir! yes!: says Adams, :I have a (orse! but I have left him behind me;: :I am glad to hear

you have one! says (rubiller; for I assure you! I don+t love to see 'lergymen on foot; it is not seemly nor suiting the &ignity of the 'loth.: (ere (rulliber made a long ,ration on the &ignity of the 'loth 8or rather 4own9 not much worth relating! till his #ife had spread the %able and set a .ess of "orridge on it for his 1rea fast. (e then said to Adams, :I don+t now! )riend! how you came to call on me; however! as you are here! if you thin proper to eat a .orsel! you may.: Adams accepted the Invitation! and the two "arsons sat down together! .rs. (rulliber waiting behind her (usband+s 'hair! as was! it seems! her custom. (rulliber eat heartily! but scarce put any thing in his .outh without finding fault with his #ife+s 'oo ery. All which the poor #oman bore patiently. Indeed she was so absolute an Admirer of her (usband+s 4reatness and Importance! of which she had frequent (ints from his own .outh! that she almost carried her Adoration to an opinion of his Infallibility. %o say the truth! the "arson had exercised her more ways than one; and the pious #oman had so well edified by her (usband+s *ermons! that she had resolved to receive the good things of this #orld together with the bad. *he had indeed been at first a little contentious; but he had long since got the better! partly by her love for this, partly by her fear of that, partly by her Religion! partly by the Respect he paid himself! and partly by that which he received from the "arish- *he had! in short! absolutely submitted! and now worshipped her (usband as 'arah did Abraham, calling him 8not $ord but9 .aster. #hilst they were at %able! her (usband gave her a fresh Example of his 4reatness; for as she had 7ust delivered a 'up of Ale to Adams, he snatched it out of his (and! and crying out! . called vurst, swallowed down the Ale. Adams denied it! and it was referred to the #ife! who tho+ her 'onscience was on the side of Adams, durst not give it against her (usband. @pon which he said! :/o! *ir! no! I should not have been so rude to have ta en it from you! if you had called vurst; but I+d have you now I+m a better! .an than to suffer the best (e in the 2ingdom to drin before me in my own (ouse! when I call vurst.: As soon as their 1rea fast was ended! Adams began in the following manner- :I thin ! *ir! it is high time to inform you of the business of my Embassy. I am a %raveller! and am passing this way in company with two young "eople! a $ad and a &amsel! my "arishioners! towards my own 'ure- we stopt at a (ouse of (ospitality in the "arish! where they directed me to you! as having the 'ure:<:%ho+ I am but a 'urate!: says (rulliber, :I believe I am as warm as the Vicar himself! or perhaps the Rector of the next "arish too; I believe I could buy them both.: :*ir!: cries Adams, :I re7oice thereat. /ow! *ir! my 1usiness is! that we are by various Accidents stript of our .oney! and are not able to pay our Rec oning! being seven *hillings. I therefore request you to assist me with the $oan of those seven *hillings! and also seven *hillings more! which peradventure I shall return to you; but if not! I am convinced you will 7oyfully embrace such an ,pportunity of laying up a %reasure in a better "lace than any this #orld affords.: *uppose a *tranger! who entered the 'hambers of a $awyer! being imagined a 'lient! when the $awyer was preparing his "alm for the )ee! should pull out a #rit against him. *uppose an Apothecary! at the &oor of a 'hariot containing some great &octor of eminent * ill! should! instead of &irections to a "atient! present him with a "otion for himself. *uppose a .inister should! instead of a good round *um! treat my $ord<or *ir< or Esq;<with a good 1roomstic . *uppose a civil 'ompanion! or a led 'aptain should! instead of Virtue! and (onour! and 1eauty! and "arts! and Admiration! thunder Vice and Infamy! and @gliness! and )olly! and 'ontempt! in his "atron+s Ears. *uppose when a %radesman first carries in his 1ill! the .an of )ashion should pay it; or suppose! if he did so! the %radesman should abate what he had overcharged on the *upposition of waiting. In short<suppose what you will! you never can nor will suppose any thing equal to the Astonishment which sei5+d on (rulliber, as soon as Adams had ended his *peech. A while he rolled his Eyes in *ilence! some times surveying Adams, then his #ife! then casting them on the 4round! then lifting them to (eaven. At last! he burst forth in the following Accents. :*ir! I believe I now where to lay my little %reasure up as well as another; I than 4< if I am not so warm as some! I am content; that is a 1lessing greater than Riches; and he to whom that is given need as no more. %o be content with a little is greater than to possess the #orld! which a .an may possess without being so. $ay up my %reasureB what matters where a .an+s %reasure is! whose (eart is in the *criptures= there is the %reasure of a 'hristian.: At these #ords the #ater ran from Adams*s Eyes; and catching (rulliber by the (and! in a Rapture! :1rother!: says he! :(eavens bless the Accident by which I came to see you; I would have wal ed many a .ile to have communed with you! and! believe me! I will shortly pay you a second Visit- but my )riends! I fancy! by this time! wonder at my stay! so let me have the .oney immediately.: (rulliber then put on a stern $oo ! and

cry+d out! :%hou dost not intend to rob me=: At which the #ife! bursting into %ears! fell on her 2nees and roared out! :, dear *ir! for (eaven+s sa e don+t rob my .aster! we are but poor "eople.: :4et up for a )ool as thou art! and go about thy 1usiness!: said (rulliber, :dost thin the .an will venture his $ife= he is a 1eggar and no Robber.: :Very true indeed!: answered Adams. :I wish! with all my heart! the %ithing0.an was here!: cries (rulliber, :I would have thee punished as a Vagabond for thy Impudence. )ourteen *hillings indeedB I won+t give thee a )arthing. I believe thou art no more a 'lergyman than the #oman there! 8pointing to his #ife9 but if thou art! dost deserve to have thy 4own stript over thy *houlders! for running about the 'ountry in such a manner.: :I forgive your *uspicions!: says Adams, :but suppose I am not a 'lergyman! I am nevertheless thy 1rother! and thou! as a 'hristian! much more as a 'lergyman! art obliged to relieve my &istress.: :&ost preach to me!: replied (rulliber, :dost pretend to instruct me in my &uty=: :Ifac s! a good *tory!: cries .rs. (rulliber, to preach to my .aster.: :*ilence! #oman!: cries (rulliber; :I would have thee now! )riend!: 8addressing himself to Adams,9 :I shall not learn my &uty from such as thee; I now what 'harity is! better than to give to Vagabonds. 1esides! if we were inclined! the "oors Rate obliges us to give so much 'harity!: 8cries the #ife.9 "ughB thou art a )ool! "oors ReateB hold thy /onsense!: answered (rulliber, and then turning to Adams, he told him! :he would give him nothing.: :I am sorry!: answered Adams, :that you do now what 'harity is! since you practise it no better; I must tell you! if you trust to your 2nowledge for your ?ustification! you will find yourself deceived! tho+ you should add )aith to it without good #or s.: :)ellow!: cries (rulliber, &ost thou spea against )aith in my (ouse= 4et out of my &oors! I will no longer remain under the same Roof with a #retch who spea s wantonly of )aith and the *criptures.: :/ame not the *criptures!: says Adams, :(ow! not name the *cripturesB &o you disbelieve the *criptures=: cries (rulliber. /o! but you do!: answered Adams, :if I may reason from your "ractice- for their 'ommands are so explicite! and their Rewards and "unishments so immense! that it is impossible a .an should stedfastly believe without obeying. /ow! there is no 'ommand more express! no &uty more frequently en7oined than 'harity. #hoever therefore is void of 'harity! I ma e no scruple of pronouncing that he is no 'hristian.: :I would not advise thee!: 8says (rulliber 9 :to say that I am no 'hristian. I won+t ta e it of youfor I believe I am as good a .an as thyself;: 8and indeed! tho+ he was now rather too corpulent for athletic Exercises! he had in his Aouth been one of the best 1oxers and 'udgel0players in the 'ounty.9 (is #ife seeing him clench his )ist! interposed! and begged him not to fight! but shew himself the true 'hristian! and ta e the $aw of him. As nothing could provo e Adams to stri e! but an absolute Assault on himself or his )riend; he smiled at the angry $oo and 4estures of (rulliber; and telling him! he was sorry to see such .en in ,rders! departed without farther 'eremony. '(A". CV. An Adventure, the ConseBuence of a new .nstance which Parson Adams gave of his -orgetfulness. #hen he came bac to the Inn! he found !oseph and -anny sitting together. %hey were so far from thin ing his Absence long! as he had feared they would! that they never once miss+d or thought of him. Indeed! I have been often assured by both! that they spent these (ours in a most delightful 'onversation- but as I never could prevail on either to relate it! so I cannot communicate it to the Reader. Adams acquainted the $overs with the ill *uccess of his Enterpri5e. %hey were all greatly confounded! none being able to propose any .ethod of departing! +till !oseph at last advised calling in the (ostess! and desiring her to trust them; which -anny said she despaired of her doing! as she was one of the sourest0fac+d #omen she had ever beheld. 1ut she was agreebly disappointed; for the (ostess was no sooner as ed the >uestion than she readily agreed; and with a 'urt+sy and *mile! wished them a good ?ourney. (owever! lest -anny*s * ill in "hysiognomy should be called in question! we will venture to assign one Reason! which might probably incline her to this 'onfidence and 4ood0(umour. #hen Adams said he was going to visit his 1rother! he had unwittingly imposed on !oseph and -anny; who both believed he had meant his natural 1rother! and not his 1rother in &ivinity; and had so informed the (ostess on he Enquiry after him. /ow .r. (rulliber had by his "iety! 4ravity! Austerity! Reserve! and the ,pinion of his great #ealth! so great an Authority in his "arish! that they all lived in the utmost )ear and Apprehension of him. It was therefore no wonder that the (ostess!

who new it was in his ,ption whether she should ever sell another .ug of &rin ! did not dare affront his supposed 1rother by denying him 'redit. %hey were now 7ust on their &eparture! when Adams recollected he had left his 4reat 'oat and (at at .r. (rulliber*s As he was not desirous of renewing his Visit! the (ostess herself! having no *ervant at home! offered to fetch it. %his was an unfortunate Expedient- for the (ostess was soon undeceived in the ,pinion she had entertained of Adams, whom (rulliber abused in the grossest %erms! especially when he heard he had had the Assurance to pretend to be his near Relation. At her Return therefore! she entirely changed her /ote. *he said! :)ol s might be ashamed of travelling about and pretending to be what they were not. %hat %axes were high! and for her part! she was obliged to pay for what she had; she could not therefore possibly! nor she would not trust any body! no not her own )ather. %hat .oney was never scarcer! and she wanted to ma e up a *um. %hat she expected therefore they should pay their Rec oning before they left the (ouse.: Adams was now greatly perplexed- but as he new that he could easily have borrowed such a *um at his own "arish! and as he new he would have lent it himself to any .ortal in &istress; so he too fresh 'ourage! and sallied out all round the "arish! but to no purpose; he returned as pennyless as he went! groaning and lamenting! that it was possible in a 'ountry professing 'hristianity! for a #retch to starve in the midst of his )ellow0'reatures who abounded. #hilst he was gone! the (ostess who stayed as a sort of 4uard with !oseph and -anny entertained them with the 4oodness of "arson (rulliber; and indeed he had not only a very good 'haracter! as to other >ualities! in the /eighbourhood! but was reputed a .an of great 'harity. Adams was no sooner returned the second time! than the *torm grew exceeding high! the (ostess declaring among other things! that if they offered to stir without paying her! she would soon overta e them with a #arrant. "lato or Aristotle, or some body else hath said! %hat when the most exquisite 'unning fails! 'hance often hits the .ar ! and that by .eans the least expected. <irgil expresses this very boldly(urne Buod optanti )ivFm promittere nemo Auderet, volvenda )ies en attulit ultro. I would quote more great .en if I could- but my .emory not permitting me! I will proceed to exemplify these ,bservations by the following Instance. %here chanced 8for Adams had not 'unning enough to contrive it9 to be at that time in the Alehouse! a )ellow! who had been formerly a &rummer in an .rish Regiment! and now travelled the 'ountry as a "edlar. %his .an having attentively listened to the &iscourse of the (ostess! at last too Adams aside! and as ed him what the *um was for which they were detained. As soon as he was informed! he sighed and said! :he was sorry it was so much- for that he had no more than six *hillings and *ixpence in his "oc et! which he would lend them with all his heart.: Adams gave a 'aper! and cry+d out! :it would do- for that he had *ixpence himself.: And thus these poor "eople! who could not engage the 'ompassion of Riches and "iety! were at length delivered out of their &istress by the 'harity of a poor "edlar. I *hall refer it to my Reader! to ma e what ,bservations he pleases on this Incident- it is sufficient for me to inform him! that after Adams and his 'ompanions had returned him a thousand %han s! and told him where he might call to be repaid! they all sallied out of the (ouse without any 'omplements from their (ostess! or indeed without paying her any; Adams declaring! he would ta e particular 'are never to call there again! and she on her side assuring them she wanted no such 4uests. '(A". CVI. A very curious Adventure, in which $r. Adams gave a much greater .nstance of the honest 'implicity of his 1eart than of his &8perience in the Ways of this World. ,ur %ravellers had wal ed about two .iles from that Inn! which they had more reason to have mista en for a 'astle! than &on Eui8ote ever had any of those in which he so7ourned; seeing they had met with such &ifficulty in escaping out of its #alls; when they came to a "arish! and beheld a *ign of Invitation hanging

out. A 4entleman sat smoa ing a "ipe at the &oor; of whom Adams enquired the Road! and received so courteous and obliging an Answer! accompanied with so smiling a 'ountenance! that the good "arson! whose (eart was naturally disposed to $ove and Affection! began to as several other >uestions; particularly the /ame of the "arish! and who was the ,wner of a large (ouse whose )ront they then had in prospect. %he 4entleman answered as obligingly as before; and as to the (ouse! acquainted him it was his own. (e then proceeded in the following manner- :*ir! I presume by your (abit you are a 'lergyman- and as you are travelling on foot! I suppose a 4lass of good 1eer will not be disagreeable to you; and I can recommend my $andlord+s within! as some of the best in all this 'ounty. #hat say you! will you halt a little and let us ta e a "ipe together- there is no better %obacco in the 2ingdom=: %his "roposal was not displeasing to Adams, who had allayed his %hirst that &ay! with no better $iquor than what .rs. (rulliber*s 'ellar had produced; and which was indeed little superior either in Richness or )lavour to that which distilled from those 4rains her generous (usband bestowed on his (ogs. (aving therefore abundantly than ed the 4entleman for his ind Invitation! and bid !oseph and -anny follow him! he entered the Ale0(ouse! where a large $oaf and 'heese and a "itcher of 1eer! which truly answered the 'haracter given of it! being set before them! the three %ravellers fell to eating with Appetites infinitely more voracious than are to be found at the most exquisite Eating0(ouses in the "arish of 't. !ames*s. %he 4entleman expressed great &elight in the hearty and chearful 1ehaviour of Adams; and particularly in the )amiliarity with which he conversed with !oseph and -anny, whom he often called his 'hildren! a %erm! he explained to mean no more than his "arishioners; saying! he loo ed on all those whom 4od had entrusted to his 'ure! to stand to him in that Relation. %he 4entleman sha ing him by the (and highly applauded those *entiments. :%hey are indeed!: says he! :the true "rinciples of a 'hristian &ivine; and I heartily wish they were universal- but on the contrary! I am sorry to say the "arson of our "arish instead of esteeming his poor "arishioners as a part of his )amily! seems rather to consider them as not of the same *pecies with himself. (e seldom spea s to any unless some few the richest of us; nay indeed! he will not move his (at to the others. I often laugh when I behold him on 'undays strutting along the 'hurch0Aard! li e a %ur y0'oc ! through Rows of his "arishioners; who bow to him with as much *ubmission and are as unregarded as a *ett of servile 'ourtiers by the proudest "rince in Christendom. 1ut if such temporal "ride is ridiculous! surely the spiritual is odious and detestable- if such a puffed up empty human 1ladder strutting in princely Robes! 7ustly moves one+s &erision; surely in the (abit of a "riest it must raise our *corn.: :&oubtless!: answered Adams, :your ,pinion is right; but I hope such Examples are rare. %he 'lergy whom I have the honour to now! maintain a different 1ehaviour; and you will allow me! *ir! that the Readiness! which too many of the $aity show to condemn the ,rder! may be one reason of their avoiding too much (umility.: :Very true indeed!: says the 4entleman; :I find! *ir! you are a .an of excellent *ense! and am happy in this ,pportunity of nowing you- perhaps! our accidental meeting may not be disadvantageous to you neither. At present! I shall only say to you! that the Incumbent of this $iving is old and infirm; and that it is in my 4ift. &octor! give me your (and; and assure yourself of it at his &ecease!: Adams told him! he was never more confounded in his $ife! than at his utter Incapacity to ma e any return to such noble and unmerited 4enerosity.: :A mere %rifle! *ir!: cries the 4entleman! :scarce worth your Acceptance; a little more than three hundred a Aear. I wish it was double the Value for your sa e.: Adams bowed! and cried from the Emotions of his 4ratitude; when the other as ed him! :if he was married! or had any 'hildren! besides those in the spiritual *ense he had mentioned.: :*ir!: replied the "arson! :I have a #ife and six at your service.: :%hat is unluc y!: says the 4entleman; :for I would otherwise have ta en you into my own (ouse as my 'haplain- however! I have another in the "arish! 8for the "arsonage (ouse is not good enough9 which I will furnish for you. "ray does your #ife understand a &airy=: I can+t profess she does!: says Adams. I am sorry for it!: quoth the 4entleman; I would have given you half a do5en 'ows! and very good 4rounds to have maintained them.: :*ir!: says Adams, in an Ecstacy! :you are too liberal; indeed you are.: :/ot at all!: cries the 4entleman! :I esteem Riches only as they give me an opportunity of doing 4ood; and I never saw one whom I had greater Inclination to serve.: At which #ords he shoo him heartily by the (and! and told him he had sufficient Room in his (ouse to entertain him and his )riends. Adams begged he might give him no such %rouble! that they could be very well accommodated in the (ouse where they were; forgetting they had not a *ixpenny "iece among them. %he 4entleman would not be denied; and informing himself how far

they were travelling! he said it was too long a ?ourney to ta e on foot! and begged that they would favour him! by suffering him to lend them a *ervant and (orses; adding withal! that if they would do him the pleasure of their 'ompany only two days! he would furnish them with his 'oach and six. Adams turning to !oseph, said! how luc y is this 4entleman+s goodness to you! who I am afraid would be scarce able to hold out on your lame $eg! and then addressing the "erson who made him these liberal "romises! after much bowing! he cried out! :1lessed be the (our which first introduced me to a .an of your 'harity- you are indeed a 'hristian of the true primitive ind! and an honour to the 'ountry wherein you live. I would willing have ta en a "ilgrimage to the holy $and to to have beheld you- for the Advantages which we draw from your 4oodness! give me little pleasure! in comparison of what I en7oy for your own sa e; when I consider the %reasures you are by these means laying up for your self in a 'ountry that passeth not away. #e will therefore! most generous *ir! accept your 4oodness! as well the Entertainment you have so indly offered us at your (ouse this Evening! as the Accommodation of your (orses %o0morrow .orning.: (e then began to search for his (at! as did !oseph for his; and both they and -anny were in order of &eparture! when the 4entleman stopping short! and seeming to meditate by himself for the space of about a .inute! exclaimed thus- :*ure never any thing was so unluc y; I have forgot that my (ouse02eeper was gone abroad! and has loc ed up all my Rooms; indeed I would brea them open for you! but shall not be able to furnish you with a 1ed; for she has li ewise put away all my $innen. I am glad it entered into my (ead before I had given you the %rouble of wal ing there; besides! I believe you will find better accommodations here than you expect. $andlord! you can provide good 1eds for these "eople! can+t you=: :Aes and please your #orship!: cries the (ost! :and such as no $ord or ?ustice of the "eace in the 2ingdom need be ashamed to lie in.: :I am heartily sorry!: says the 4entleman! :for this &isappointment. I am resolved I will never suffer her to carry away the 2eys again.: :"ray! *ir! let it not ma e you uneasy!: cries Adams, :we shall do very well here; and the $oan of your (orses is a )avour! we shall be incapable of ma ing any Return to.: :AyB: said the *quire :the (orses shall attend you here at what (our in the .orning you please.: And now after many 'ivilities too tedious to enumerate! many *quee5es by the (and! with most affectionate $oo s and *miles on each other! and after appointing the (orses at seven the next .orning! the 4entleman too his $eave of them! and departed to his own (ouse. Adams and his 'ompanions returned to the %able! where the "arson smoa ed another "ipe! and then they all retired to Rest. .r. Adams rose very early and called !oseph out of his 1ed! between whom a very fierce &ispute ensued! whether -anny should ride behind !oseph, or behind the 4entleman+s *ervant; !oseph insisting on it! that he was perfectly recovered! and was as capable of ta ing care of -anny, as any other "erson could be. 1ut Adams would not agree to it! and declared he would not trust her behind him; for that he was wea er than he imagined himself to be. %his &ispute continued a long time! and had begun to be very hot! when a *ervant arrived from their good )riend! to acquaint them! that he was unfortunately prevented from lending them any (orses; for that his 4room had! un nown to him! put his whole *table under a 'ourse of "hysic . %his Advice presently struc the two &isputants dumb; Adams cried out! :#as ever any thing so unluc y as this poor 4entleman= I protest I am more sorry on his account! than my own. Aou see! !oseph, how this good0natur+d .an is treated by his *ervants; one loc s up his $inen! another physic s his (orses; and I suppose by his being at this (ouse last /ight! the 1utler had loc ed up his 'ellar. 1less usB how 4ood0nature is used in this #orldB I protest I am more concerned on his account than my own.: :*o am not I!: cries !oseph ; :not that I am much troubled about wal ing on foot; all my 'oncern is! how we shall get out of the (ouse; unless 4od sends another "edlar to redeem us. 1ut certainly! this 4entleman has such an Affection for you! that he would lend you a larger *um than we owe here; which is not above four or five *hillings.: :Very true! 'hild!: answered Adams; :I will write a $etter to him! and will even venture to sollicit him for three (alf0'rowns; there will be no harm in having two or three *hillings in our "oc ets- as we have full forty .iles to travel! we may possibly have occasion for them.: )anny being now risen! !oseph paid her a Visit! and left Adams to write his $etter; which having finished! he dispatched a 1oy with it to the 4entleman! and then seated himself by the &oor! lighted his "ipe! and betoo himself to .editation.

%he 1oy staying longer than seemed to be necessary! !oseph who with -anny was now returned to the "arson! expressed some Apprehensions! that the 4entleman+s *teward had loc ed up his "urse too. %o which Adams answered! :It might very possibly be; and he should wonder at no $iberties which the &evil might put into the (ead of a wic ed *ervant to ta e with so worthy a .aster-: but added! :that as the *um was so small! so noble a 4entleman would be easily able to procure it in the "arish; tho+ he had it not in his own "oc et. Indeed!: says he! :if it was four or five 4uineas! or any such large >uantity of .oney! it might be a different matter.: %hey were now sat down to 1rea fast over some %oast and Ale! when the 1oy returned; and informed them! that the 4entleman was not at home. :Very well!: cries Adams; :but why! 'hild! did you not stay +till his return= 4o bac again! my good 1oy! and wait for his coming home- he cannot be gone far! as his (orses are all sic ; and besides! he had no Intention to go abroad; for he invited us to spend this &ay and %o0morrow at his (ouse. %herefore! go bac ! 'hild! and tarry +till his return home.: %he .essenger departed! and was bac again with great Expedition; bringing an Account! that the 4entleman was gone a long ?ourney! and would not be at home again this .onth. At these #ords! Adams seemed greatly confounded! saying! :%his must be a sudden Accident! as the *ic ness or &eath of a Relation! or some such unforeseen .isfortune;: and then turning to !oseph, cried! :I wish you had reminded me to have borrowed this .oney last /ight.: !oseph smiling! answered! :he was very much deceived! if the 4entleman would not have found some Excuse to avoid lending it. I own!: says he! :I was never much pleased with his professing so much 2indness for you at first sight- for I have heard the 4entlemen of our 'loth in London tell many such *tories of their .asters. 1ut when the 1oy brought the .essage bac of his not being at home! I presently new what would follow; for whenever a .an of )ashion doth not care to fulfil his "romises! the 'ustom is! to order his *ervants that he will never be at home to the "erson so promised. In London they call it denying him. I have my self denied *ir (homas %ooby above a hundred times; and when the .an has danced Attendance for about a .onth! or sometimes longer! he is acquainted in the end! that the 4entleman is gone out of %own! and could do nothing in the 1usiness.: :4ood $ordB: says Adams; :#hat #ic edness is there in the 'hristian #orld= I profess! almost equal to what I have read of the 1eathens. 1ut surely! !oseph, your *uspicions of this 4entleman must be un7ust; for! what a silly )ellow must he be! who would do the &evil+s #or for nothing= and can+st thou tell me any Interest he could possibly propose to himself by deceiving us in his "rofessions=: :It is not for me!: answered !oseph, :to give Reasons for what .en do! to a 4entleman of your $earning.: :Aou say right!: quoth Adams; :2nowledge of .en is only to be learnt from 1oo s! Plato and 'eneca for that; and those are Authors! I am afraid 'hild! you never read.: :/ot I! *ir! truly!: answered !oseph; :all I now is! it is a .axim among the 4entlemen of our 'loth! that those .asters who promise the most perform the least; and I have often heard them say! they have found the largest Vailes in those )amilies! where they were not promised any. 1ut! *ir! instead of considering any farther these .atters! it would be our wisest way to contrive some .ethod of getting out of this (ouse- for the generous 4entleman! instead of doing us any *ervice! hath left us the whole Rec oning to pay.: Adams was going to answer! when their (ost came in; and with a ind of ?eering0*mile said! :#ell! .astersB the *quire has not sent his (orses for you yet. $aud help meB how easily some )ol s ma e "romisesB: :(owB: says Adams, :have you ever nown him do any thing of this ind before=: :Aye marry have I!: answered the (ost; :it is no business of mine! you now! *ir! to say any thing to a 4entleman to his face- but now he is not here! I will assure you! he has not his )ellow within the three next .ar et0%owns. I own! I could not help laughing! when I heard him offer you the $iving; for thereby hangs a good ?est. I thought he would have offered you my (ouse next; for one is no more his to dispose of than the other.: At these #ords! Adams blessing himself! declared! :he had never read of such a .onster; but what vexes me most!: says he! :is! that he hath decoyed us into running up a long &ebt with you! which we are not able to pay; for we have no .oney about us; and what is worse! live at such a distance! that! if you should trust us! I am afraid you would lose your .oney! for want of our finding any 'onveniency of sending it.: :%rust you! .asterB: says the (ost! that I will with all my heart; I honour the 'lergy too much to deny trusting one of them for such a %rifle; besides! I li e your fear of never paying me. I have lost many a &ebt in my $ife0time; but was promised to be paid them all in a very short time. I will score this Rec oning for the /ovelty of it. It is the first I do assure you of its ind. 1ut what say you! .aster! shall we have t+other "ot before we part= It will waste but a little 'hal more; and if you never pay me a *hilling!

the $oss will not ruin me.: Adams li ed the Invitation very well; especially as it was delivered with so hearty an Accent. <(e shoo his (ost by the (and! and than ing him! said! :he would tarry another "ot! rather for the "leasure of such worthy 'ompany than for the $iquor;: adding! :he was glad to find some 'hristians left in the 2ingdom; for that he almost began to suspect that he was so7ourning in a 'ountry inhabited only by !ews and (ur"s.: %he ind (ost produced the $iquor! and !oseph with -anny retired into the 4arden; where while they solaced themselves with amorous &iscourse! Adams sat down with his (ost; and both filling their 4lasses and lighting their "ipes! they began that &ialogue! which the Reader will find in the next 'hapter. '(A". CVII. A )ialogue between $r. Abraham Adams and his 1ost, which, by the )isagreement in their Opinions seemed to threaten an unluc"y Catastrope, had it not been timely prevented by the 7eturn of the Lovers. *ir!: said the (ost! :I assure you! you are not the first to whom our *quire hath promised more than he hath performed. (e is so famous for this "ractice! that his #ord will not be ta en for much by those who now him. I remember a young )ellow whom he promised his "arents to ma e an Exciseman. %he poor "eople! who could ill afford it! bred their *on to #riting and Accounts! and other $earning! to qualify him for the "lace; and the 1oy held up his (ead above his 'ondition with these (opes; nor would he go to plough! nor do any other ind of #or ; and went constantly drest as fine as could be! with two clean 1olland *hirts a #ee ! and this for several Aears; +till at last he followed the *quire up to London, thin ing there to mind him of his "romises- but he could never get sight of him. *o that being out of .oney and 1usiness! he fell into evil 'ompany! and wic ed 'ourses; and in the end came to a *entence of %ransportation! the /ews of which bro e the .other+s (eart. %here was a /eighbour of mine! a )armer! who had two *ons whom he bred up to the 1usiness. "retty $ads they were; nothing would serve the *quire! but that the youngest must be made a "arson. @pon which! he persuaded the )ather to send him to *chool! promising! that he would afterwards maintain him at the @niversity; and when he was of proper Age! give him a $iving. 1ut after the $ad had been seven Aears at *chool! and his )ather brought him to the *quire with a $etter from his .aster! that he was fit for the @niversity; the *quire! instead of minding his "romise! or sending him thither at his Expence! only told his )ather! that the young .an was a fine *cholar; and it was pity he could not afford to eep him at O8ford for four or five Aears more! by which %ime! if he could get him a 'uracy! he might have him ordained.: %he )armer said! :he was not a .an sufficient to do any such thing.: :#hy then!: answered the *quire; :I am very sorry you have given him so much $earning; for if he cannot get his living by that! it will rather spoil him for any thing else; and your other *on who can hardly write his /ame! will do more at plowing and sowing! and is in a better 'ondition than he- and indeed so it proved; for the poor $ad not finding )riends to maintain him in his $earning! as he had expected; and being unwilling to wor ! fell to drin ing! though he was a very sober $ad before; and in a short time! partly with 4rief! and partly with good $iquor! fell into a 'onsumption and died. %here was another! a young #oman! and the handsomest in all this /eighbourhood! whom he enticed up to London, promising to ma e her a 4entlewoman to one of your #omen of >uality- but instead of eeping his #ord! we have since heard! after having a 'hild by her himself! she became a common #hore; then ept a 'offee0(ouse in Covent,#arden, and a little after died of the -rench &istemper in a 4oal. I could tell you many more *tories- but how do you imagine he served me myself= Aou must now! *ir! I was bred a *ea0faring .an; and have been many Voyages; +till at last I came to be .aster of a *hip myself! and was in a fair #ay of ma ing a )ortune! when I was attac ed by one of those cursed #uarda,Costas, who too our *hips before the 1eginning of the #ar; and after a )ight wherein I lost the greater part of my 'rew! my Rigging all demolished! and two *hots received between #ind and #ater! I was forced to stri e. %he Villains carried off my *hip! a 1rigantine of LJI %ons; and put me! a .an! and a 1oy! into a little bad "in ! in which with much ado! we at last made -almouth; tho+ I believe the 'paniards did not imagine she could possibly live a &ay at *ea. @pon my return hither! where my #ife who was of this 'ountry then lived! the *quire told me! he was so pleased with the &efence I had made against the Enemy! that he did not fear getting me promoted to a $ieutenancy of a .an of #ar! if I would accept of it! which I than fully assured him I would. #ell! *ir! two or three Aears past! during which! I had many

repeated "romises! not only from the *quire! but 8as he told me9 from the $ords of the Admiralty. (e never returned from London, but I was assured I might be satisfied now! for I was certain of the first Vacancy; and what surpri5es me still! when I reflect on it! these Assurances were given me with no less 'onfidence! after so many &isappointments! than at first. At last! *ir! growing going weary and somewhat suspicious after so much delay. I wrote to a )riend in London, who I new had some Acquaintance at the best (ouse in the Admiralty; and desired him to bac the *quire+s Interest- for indeed! I feared he had sollicited the Affair with more 'oldness than he pretended. <And what Answer do you thin my )riend sent me= <%ruly! *ir! he acquainted me! that the *quire had never mentioned my /ame at the Admiralty in his $ife; and unless I had much faithfuller Interest! advised me to give over my "retensions! which I immediately did; and with the 'oncurrence of my #ife! resolved to set up an Alehouse! where you are heartily welcome- and so my *ervice to you; and may the *quire! and all such snea ing Rascals go to the &evil together.: :,h fieB: says Adams ; :,h fieB (e is indeed a wic ed .an; but 4< will! I hope! turn his (eart to Repentance. /ay! if he could but once see the .eanness of this detestable Vice; would he but once reflect that he is one of the most scandalous as well as pernicious $yars; sure he must despise himself to so intolerable a degree! that it would be impossible for him to continue a .oment in such a 'ourse. And to confess the %ruth! notwithstanding the 1aseness of this 'haracter! which he hath too well deserved! he hath in his 'ountenance sufficient *ymptoms of that bona .ndoles, that *weetness of &isposition which furnishes out a good 'hristian.: :AhB .aster! .aster!: 8says the (ost!9 :if you had travelled as far as I have! and conversed with the many /ations where I have traded! you would not give any 'redit to a .an+s 'ountenance. *ymptoms in his 'ountenance!: quothaB :I would loo there perhaps to see whether a .an had had the *mall0"ox! but for nothing elseB: (e spo e this with so little regard to the "arson+s ,bservation! that it a good deal nettled him; and ta ing the "ipe hastily from his .outh! he thus answered- <:.aster of mine! perhaps I have travelled a great deal farther than you without the Assistance of a *hip. &o you imagine sailing by different 'ities or 'ountries is travelling= /o. Coelum non Animum mutant Bui trans mare currunt. :I 'an go farther in an Afternoon! than you in a %welve0.onth. #hat! I suppose you have seen the "illars of 1ercules, and perhaps the #alls of Carthage. /ay! you may have heard 'cylla, and seen Charybdis; you may have entered the 'loset where Archimedes was found at the ta ing 'yracuse. I suppose you have sailed among the Cyclades, and passed the famous *treights which ta e their name from the unfortunate 1elle, whose )ate is sweetly described by Apollonius 7hodius; you have past the very *pot! I conceive! where )9dalus fell into that *ea! his waxen #ings being melted by the *un; you have traversed the &u8ine *ea! I ma e no doubt; nay! you may have been on the 1an s of the Caspian, and called at Colchis, to see if there is ever another 4olden )leece.: <:/ot I truly! .aster!: answered the (ost! :I never touched at any of these "laces.: :1ut I have been at all these!: replied Adams. :%hen I suppose!: cries the (ost! :you have been at the &ast .ndies, for there are no such! I will be sworn either in the West or the Levant.: :"ray where+s the Levant,: quoth Adams, that should be in the &ast .ndies by right.: <:, hoB you are a pretty %raveller!: cries the (ost! :and not now the Levant. .y service to you! .aster; you must not tal of these things with meB you must not tip us the %raveller; it won+t go here.: :*ince thou art so dull to misunderstand me still!: quoth Adams, :I will inform thee; the travelling I mean is in 1oo s! the only way of travelling by which any 2nowledge is to be acquired. )rom them I learn what I asserted 7ust now! that /ature generally imprints such a "ortraiture of the .ind in the 'ountenance! that a s ilful "hysiognomist will rarely be deceived. I presume you have never read the *tory of 'ocrates to this purpose! and therefore I will tell it you. A certain "hysiognomist asserted of 'ocrates, that he plainly discovered by his )eatures that he was a Rogue in his /ature. A 'haracter so contrary to the %enour of all this great .an+s Actions! and the generally received ,pinion concerning him! that the 1oys of Athens threw *tones at the "hysiognomist! and would have demolished him for his Ignorance! had not 'ocrates himself prevented them by confessing the %ruth of his ,bservations! and ac nowledging that tho+ he corrected his &isposition by "hilosophy! he was indeed naturally as inclined to Vice as had been predicated of him. /ow! pray resolve me!<(ow should a .an now this *tory! if he had not read it=: :#ell .aster!: said the (ost! :and what signifies it whether a .an nows it or no= (e who goes abroad as I have done! will always have opportunities enough of nowing the #orld! without troubling his head with 'ocrates, or any such )ellows.: <:)riend!: cres Adams, :if a .an

would sail round the #orld! and anchor in every (arbour of it! without $earning! he would return home as ignorant as he went out.: :$ord help you!: answered the (ost! :there was my 1oatswain! poor )ellowB he could scarce either write or read; and yet he would navigate a *hip with any .aster of a .an of #ar; and a very pretty nowledge of %rade he had too.: :%rade!: answered Adams, :as Aristotle proves in his first 'hapter of "olitics! is below a "hilosopher! and unnatural as it is managed now. %he (ost loo +d stedfastly at Adams, and after a .inute+s silence as ed him :if he was one of the #riters of the #a2etteers= for I have heard!: says he! :they are writ by "arsons.: : #a2etteersB: answer+d Adams. :#hat is that=: :It is a dirty /ews0"aper!: replied the (ost! :which hath been given away all over the /ation for these many Aears to abuse %rade and honest .en! which I would not suffer to lie on my %able! tho+ it hath been offered me for nothing.: :/ot I truly!: said Adams, I never write any thing but *ermons! and I assure you I am no Enemy to %rade! whilst it is consistent with (onesty; nay! I have always loo ed on the %radesman! as a very valuable .ember of *ociety! and perhaps inferior to none but the .an of $earning.: :/o! I believe he is not! nor to him neither!: answered the (ost. ,f what use would $earning be in a 'ountry without %rade= #hat would all you "arsons do to clothe your 1ac s and feed your 1ellies= #ho fetches you your *il s and your $inens! and your #ines! and all the other /ecessaries of $ife= I spea chiefly with regard to the *ailors.: :Aou should say the Extravagancies of $ife!: replied the "arson! :but admit they were the /ecessaries! there is something more necessary than $ife it self which is provided by $earning; I mean the $earning of the 'lergy. #ho clothes you with "iety! .ee ness! (umility! 'harity! "atience! and all the other 'hristian Virtues= #ho feeds your *ouls with the .il of brotherly $ove! and diets them with all the dainty )ood of (oliness! which at once cleanses them of all impure carnal Affections! and fattens them with the truly rich *pirit of 4race= < #ho doth this=: :Ay! who indeedB: cries the (ost; :for I do not remember ever to have seen any such 'lothing or such )eeding. And so in the mean time! .aster! my service to you.: Adams was going to answer with some severity! when !oseph and -anny re0returned! and pressed his &eparture so eagerly! that he would not refuse them; and so grasping his 'rabstic ! he too leave of his (ost! 8neither of them being so well pleased with each other as they had been at their first sitting down together9 and with !oseph and -anny, who both exprest much Impatience! departed; and now all together renewed their ?ourney. (he &nd of the first <olume. BOO* III. '(A". I. $atter prefatory in Praise of %iography. /otwithstanding the "reference which may be vulgarly given to the Authority of those Romance0#riters! who intitle their 1oo s! the (istory of &ngland, the (istory of -rance, of 'pain, Ec. it is most certain! that %ruth is only to be found in their #or s who celebrate the $ives of 4reat .en! and are commonly called 1iographers! as the others should indeed be termed %opographers or 'horographers- #ords which might well mar the &istinction between them; it being the 1usiness of the latter chiefly to describe 'ountries and 'ities! which! with the Assistance of .aps! they do pretty 7ustly! and may be depended upon- 1ut as to the Actions and 'haracters of .en! their #ritings are not quite so authentic! of which there needs no other "roof than those eternal 'ontradictions! occurring between two %opographers who underta e the (istory of the same 'ountry- )or instance! between my $ord Clarendon and .r. Whitloc", between .r. &chard and 7apin, and many others; where )acts being set forth in a different $ight! every Reader believes as he pleases! but all agree in the *cene! where it is supposed to have happen+d. /ow with us 1iographers the 'ase is different! the )acts we deliver may be relied on! tho+ we often mista e the Age and 'ountry wherein they happened- )or tho+ it may be worth the Examination of 'ritics! whether the *hepherd Chrysostom, who! as Cervantes informs us! died for $ove of the fair $arcella, who hated him; was ever in 'pain, will any one doubt but that such a silly )ellow hath really existed. Is there in the #orld such a *ceptic as to disbelieve the .adness of Cardenio, the "erfidy of -erdinand, the impertinent 'uriosity of Anselmo, the #ea ness of Camilla, the irresolute )riendship of Lothario; tho+ perhaps as to the %ime and "lace where those several "ersons lived! that good (istorian may be deplorably deficient- 1ut the most nown Instance of this ind is in the true

(istory of #il,%las, where the inimitable 1iographer hath made a notorious 1lunder in the 'ountry of &r. 'anglardo, who used his "atients as a Vintner doth his #ine0Vessels! by letting out their 1lood! and filling them up with #ater. %he same #riter hath li ewise erred in the 'ountry of his Archbishop! as well as that of those great "ersonages whose @nderstandings were too sublime to taste any thing but %ragedy! and perhaps in many others. %he same .ista es may li ewise be observed in 'carron, the Arabian ights, the (istory of $arianne and Le Paisan Parvenu, and perhaps some few other #riters of this 'lass! whom I have not read! or do not at present recollect; for I would by no means be thought to comprehend those great 4enius+s the Authors of immense Romances! or the modern /ovel and Atalantis #riters; who without any Assistance from /ature or (istory! record "ersons who never were! or will be! and )acts which never did nor possibly can happen- #hose (eroes are of their own 'reation! and their 1rains the 'haos whence all their .aterials are collected. /ot that such #riters deserve no (onour; so far otherwise! that perhaps they merit the highestfor what can be nobler than to be as an Example of the wonderful Extent of human 4enius. ,ne may apply to them what %al2ac says of Aristotle, that they are a second /ature; for they have no 'ommunication with the first; by which Authors of an inferiour 'lass! who can not stand alone! are obliged to support themselves as with 'rutches; but these of whom I am now spea ing! seem to be possessed of those 'tilts, which the excellent <oltaire tells us in his $etters carry the #enius far off, but with an irregular Pace . Indeed far out of the sight of the Reader! %eyond the 7ealm of Chaos and old ight. 1ut! to return to the former 'lass! who are contented to copy /ature! instead of forming ,riginals from their confused heap of .atter in their own 1rains; is not such a 1oo as that which records the Atchievements of the renowned )on Eui8otte, more worthy the /ame of a (istory than even $ariana*s; for whereas the latter is confined to a particular "eriod of %ime! and to a particular /ation; the former is the (istory of the #orld in general! at least that "art which is polished by $aws! Arts and *ciences; and of that from the time it was first polished to this day; nay and forwards! as long as it shall so remain. I shall now proceed to apply these ,bservations to the #or before us; for indeed I have set them down principally to obviate some 'onstructions! which the 4ood0nature of .an ind! who are always forward to see their )riends Virtues recorded! may put to particular parts. I question not but several of my Readers will now the $awyer in the *tage0'oach! the .oment they hear his Voice. It is li ewise odds! but the #it and the "rude meet with some of their Acquaintance! as well as all the rest of my 'haracters. %o prevent therefore any such malicious Applications! I declare here once for all! I describe not .en! but .anners; not an Individual! but a *pecies. "erhaps it will be answered! Are not the 'haracters then ta en from $ife= %o which I answer in the Affirmative; nay! I believe I might aver! that I have writ little more than I have seen. %he $awyer is not only alive! but hath been so these JIII Aears! and I hope 4< will indulge his $ife as many yet to come. (e hath not indeed confined himself to one "rofession! one Religion! or one 'ountry; but when the first mean selfish 'reature appeared on the human *tage! who made *elf the 'entre of the whole 'reation; would give himself no "ain! incur no &anger! advance no .oney to assist! or preserve his )ellow0 'reatures; then was our $awyer born; and whilst such a "erson as I have described! exists on Earth! so long shall he remain upon it. It is therefore doing him little (onour! to imagine he endeavours to mimic some little obscure )ellow! because he happens to resemble him in one particular )eature! or perhaps in his "rofession; whereas his Appearance in the #orld is calculated for much more general and noble "urposes! than to expose one pitiful #retch! to the small 'ircle of his Acquaintance; but to hold the 4lass to thousands in their 'losets! that they may contemplate their &eformity! and endeavour to reduce it! and thus by suffering private .ortification may avoid public *hame. %his places the 1oundary between! and distinguishes the *atirist from the $ibeller; for the former privately corrects the )ault for the 1enefit of the "erson! li e a "arent; the latter public ly exposes the "erson himself! as an Example to others! li e an Executioner. %here are besides little 'ircumstances to be considered! as the &rapery of a "icture! which tho+ )ashion varies at different %imes! the Resemblance of the 'ountenance is not by those means diminished. %hus! I believe! we may venture to say! .rs. (ow,wouse is coeval with our $awyer! and tho+ perhaps during the 'hanges! which so long an Existence must have passed through! she may in her %urn have stood behind the 1ar at an Inn! I will not scruple to affirm! she hath li ewise in the Revolution of Ages sat on a %hrone. In short where extreme %urbulency of %emper! Avarice! and an Insensibility of human .isery! with a &egree of

(ypocrisy! have united in a female 'omposition! .rs. (ow,wouse was that #oman; and where a good Inclination eclipsed by a "overty of *pirit and @nderstanding! hath glimmer+d forth in a .an! that .an hath been no other than her snea ing (usband. I shall detain my Reader no longer than to give him one 'aution more of an opposite ind- )or as in most of our particular 'haracters we mean not to lash Individuals! but all of that li e sort; so in our general &escriptions! we mean not @niversals! but would be understood with many Exceptions- )or instance! in our &escription of high "eople! we cannot be intended to include such! as whilst they are an (onour to their high Ran ! by a well0guided 'ondescension! ma e their *uperiority as easy as possible! to those whom )ortune hath chiefly placed below them. ,f this number I could name a "eer no less elevated by /ature than by )ortune! who whilst he wears the noblest Ensigns of (onour on his "erson! bears the truest *tamp of &ignity on his .ind! adorned with 4reatness! enriched with 2nowledge! and embelished with 4enius. I have seen this .an relieve with 4enerosity! while he hath conversed with )reedom! and be to the same "erson a "atron and a 'ompanion. I could name a 'ommoner raised higher above the .ultitude by superiour %alents! than is in the power of his "rince to exalt him; whose 1ehaviour to those he hath obliged is more amiable than the ,bligation itself! and who is so great a .aster of Affability! that if he could divest himself of an inherent 4reatness in his .anner! would often ma e the lowest of his Acquaintance forget who was the .aster of that "alace! in which they are so courteously entertained. %hese are "ictures which must be! I believe! nown- I declare they are ta en from the $ife! nor are intended to exceed it. 1y those high "eople therefore whom I have described! I mean a *et of #retches! who while they are a &isgrace to their Ancestors! whose (onours and )ortunes they inherit! 8or perhaps a greater to their .other! for such &egeneracy is scarce credible9 have the Insolence to treat those with disregard! who have been equal to the )ounders of their own *plendor. It is! I fancy! impossible to conceive a *pectacle more worthy of our Indignation! than that of a )ellow who is not only a 1lot in the Escutcheon of a great )amily! but a *candal to the human *pecies! maintaining a supercilious 1ehaviour to .en who are an (onour to their /ature! and a &isgrace to their )ortune. And now! Reader! ta ing these (ints along with you! you may! if you please! proceed to the *equel of this our true (istory. '(A". II. A ight,'cene, wherein several wonderful Adventures befel Adams and his -ellow,(ravellers. It was so late when our %ravellers left the Inn or Ale0house! 8for it might be called either9 that they had not travelled many .iles before /ight overtoo them! or met them! which you please. %he Reader must excuse me if I am not particular as to the #ay they too ; for as we are now drawing near the *eat of the %oobies; and as that is a tic lish /ame! which malicious "ersons may apply according to their evil Inclinations to several worthy 'ountry +*quires! a Race of .en whom we loo upon as entirely inoffensive! and for whom we have an adequate Regard! we shall lend no assistance to any such malicious "urposes. &ar ness had now overspread the (emisphere! when -anny whispered !oseph, :that she begged to rest herself a little! for that she was so tired! she could wal no farther.: !oseph immediately prevailed with "arson Adams, who was as bris as a 1ee! to stop. (e had no sooner seated himself! than he lamented the loss of his dear Cschylus; but was a little comforted! when reminded! that if he had it in his possession! he could not see to read. %he * y was so clouded! that not a *tar appeared. It was indeed! according to $ilton, &ar ness visible. %his was a 'ircumstance however very favourable to !oseph; for -anny, not suspicious of being overseen by Adams, gave a loose to her "assion! which she had never done before; and reclining her (ead on his 1osom! threw her Arm carelesly round him! and suffered him to lay his 'hee close to hers. All this infused such (appiness into !oseph, that he would not have changed his %urf for the finest &own in the finest "alace in the @niverse. Adams sat at some distance from the $overs! and being unwilling to disturb them! applied himself to .editation; in which he had not spent much time! before he discovered a $ight at some distance! that seemed approaching towards him. (e immediately hailed it! but to his *orrow and *urpri5e it stopped for a moment and then disappeared. (e then called to !oseph, as ing him! :if he had not seen the $ight.: !oseph answered!

he had.: :And did you not mar how it vanished.: 8returned he9 :tho+ I am not afraid of 4hosts! I do not absolutely disbelieve them.: (e then entered into a .editation on those unsubstantial 1eings! which was soon interrupted! by several Voices which he thought almost at his Elbow! tho+ in fact they were not so extremely near. (owever! he could distinctly hear them agree on the .urther of any one they met. And a little after heard one of them say! :he had illed a do5en since that day )ortnight.: Adams now fell on his 2nees! and committed himself to the care of "rovidence; and poor -anny, who li ewise heard those terrible #ords! embraced !oseph so closely! that had not he! whose Ears were also open! been apprehensive on her account! he would have thought no danger too dear a "rice for such Embraces. ?oseph now drew forth his "en nife! and Adams having finished his E7aculations! grasped his 'rabstic ! his only #eapon! and coming up to !oseph would have had him quit -anny, and place her in their Rear- but his Advice was fruitless! she clung closer to him! not at all regarding the "resence of Adams, and in a soothing Voice declared! :she would die in his Arms.: !oseph clasping her with inexpressible Eagerness! whispered her! :that he preferred &eath in hers! to $ife out of them.: Adams brandishing his 'rabstic ! said! :he despised &eath as much as any .an! and then repeated aloud!: 6&st hic, est animus lucis contemptor,;illum, 6Eui vita bene credat emi Buo tendis, 1onorem.6 @pon this the Voices ceased for a moment! and then one of them called out! :&<n you! who is there=: %o which Adams was prudent enough to ma e no Reply; and of a sudden he observed half a do5en $ights! which seemed to rise all at once from the 4round! and advance bris ly towards him. %his he immediately concluded to be an Apparition! and now beginning to conceive that the Voices were of the same ind! he called out! :In the /ame of the $<d what would+st thou have=: (e had no sooner spo e! than he heard one of the Voices cry out! :&<n them! here they come;: and soon after heard several hearty 1lows! as if a number of .en had been engaged at >uarterstaff. (e was 7ust advancing towards the "lace of 'ombat! when !oseph catching him by the * irts! begged him that they might ta e the ,pportunity of the dar ! to convey away -anny from the &anger which threatned her. (e presently complied! and !oseph lifting up -anny, they all three made the best of their way! and without loo ing behind them or being overta en! they had travelled full two .iles! poor -anny not once complaining of being tired; when they saw far off several $ights scattered at a small distance from each other! and at the same time found themselves on the &escent of a very steep (ill. Adams*s )oot slipping! he instantly disappeared! which greatly frightned both !oseph and -anny; indeed! if the $ight had permitted them to see it! they would scarce have refrained laughing to see the "arson rolling down the (ill! which he did from top to bottom! without receiving any harm. (e then hollowed as loud as he could! to inform them of his safety! and relieve them from the )ears which they had conceived for him. !oseph and -anny halted some time! considering what to do; at last they advanced a few "aces! where the &eclivity seemed least steep; and then !oseph ta ing his -anny in his Arms! wal ed firmly down the (ill! without ma ing a false step! and at length landed her at the bottom! where Adams soon came to them. $earn hence! my fair 'ountrywomen! to consider your own #ea ness! and the many ,ccasions on which the strength of a .an may be useful to you; and duly weighing this! ta e care! that you match not yourselves with the spindle0shan ed 1eaus and "etit .aMtres of the Age! who instead of being able li e !oseph Andrews, to carry you in lusty Arms through the rugged ways and downhill *teeps of $ife! will rather want to support their feeble $imbs with your *trength and Assistance. ,ur %ravellers now moved forwards! whither the nearest $ight presented itself! and having crossed a common )ield! they came to a .eadow! whence they seemed to be at a very little distance from the $ight! when! to their grief! they arrived at the 1an s of a River. Adams here made a full stop! and declared he could swim! but doubted how it was possible to get -anny over; to which !oseph answered! :if they wal ed along its 1an s they might be certain of soon finding a 1ridge! especially as by the number of $ights they might be assured a "arish was neat.: :,dso! that+s true indeed!: said! Adams, :I did not thin of that.: Accordingly !oseph*s Advice being ta en! they passed over two .eadows! and came to a little ,rchard! which led them to a (ouse. -anny begged of !oseph to noc at the &oor! assuring him! :she was so weary that she could hardly stand on her )eet.: Adams who was foremost performed this 'eremony! and the &oor being immediately opened! a plain ind of a .an appeared at it; Adams acquainted him! :that they had a young

#oman with them! who was so tired with her ?ourney! that he should be much obliged to him! if he would suffer her to come in and rest herself.: %he .an! who saw -anny by the $ight of the 'andle which he held in his (and! perceiving her innocent and modest $oo ! and having no Apprehensions from the civil 1ehaviour of Adams, presently answered! the young #oman was very welcome to rest herself in his (ouse! and so were her 'ompany. (e then ushered them into a very decent Room! where his #ife was sitting at a %able; she immediately rose up! and assisted them in setting forth 'hairs! and desired them to sit down! which they had no sooner done! than the .an of the (ouse as ed them if they would have any thing to refresh themselves with= Adams than ed him! and answered! he should be obliged to him for a 'up of his Ale! which was li ewise chosen by !oseph and -anny. #hilst he was gone to fill a very large ?ugg with this $iquor! his #ife told -anny she seemed greatly fatigued! and desired her to ta e something stronger than Ale; but she refused! with many than s! saying it was true! she was very much tired! but a little Rest she hoped would restore her. As soon as the 'ompany were all seated! .r. Adams, who had filled himself with Ale! and by public "ermission had lighted his "ipe; turned to the .aster of the (ouse! as ing him! :if evil *pirits did not use to wal in that /eighbourhood=: %o which receiving no answer! he began to inform him of the Adventure which they had met with on the &owns; nor had he proceeded far in his *tory! when somebody noc ed very hard at the &oor. %he 'ompany expressed some Ama5ement! and -anny and the good #oman turned pale; her (usband went forth! and whilst he was absent! which was some time! they all remained silent loo ing at one another! and heard several Voices discoursing pretty loudly. Adams was fully persuaded that *pirits were abroad! and began to meditate some Exorcisms; !oseph a little inclined to the same ,pinion- -anny was more afraid of .en! and the good #oman herself began to suspect her 4uests! and imagined those without were Rogues belonging to their 4ang. At length the .aster of the (ouse returned! and laughing! told Adams he had discovered his Apparition; that the .urderers were *heep0stealers! and the twelve "ersons murdered were no other than twelve *heep. Adding that the *hepherds had got the better of them! had secured two! and were proceeding with them to a ?ustice of "eace. %his Account greatly relieved the )ears of the whole 'ompany; but Adams muttered to himself! :(e was convinced of the truth of Apparations for all that.: %hey now sat chearfully round the )ire! +till the .aster of the (ouse having surveyed his 4uests! and conceiving that the 'assoc ! which having fallen down! appeared under Adams*s 4reat0'oat! and the shabby $ivery on !oseph Andrews, did not well suit with the )amiliarity between them! began to entertain some suspicions! not much to their Advantage- addressing himself therefore to Adams, he said! :he perceived he was a 'lergyman by his &ress! and supposed that honest .an was his )ootman.: :*ir!: answered Adams, :I am a 'lergyman at your *ervice; but as to that young .an! whom you have rightly termed honest! he is at present in no body+s *ervice! he never lived in any other )amily than that of $ady %ooby, from whence he was discharged! I assure you! for no 'rime.: !oseph said! :he did not wonder the 4entleman was surpri5ed to see one of .r. Adams*s 'haracter condescend to so much goodness with a poor .an.: :'hild!: said Adams, :I should be ashamed of my 'loth! if I thought a poor .an! who is honest! below my notice or my familiarity. I now not how those who thin otherwise! can profess themselves followers and servants of him who made no distinction! unless! peradventure! by preferring the "oor to the Rich. :*ir!: said he! addressing himself to the 4entleman! :these two poor young "eople are my "arishioners! and I loo on them and love them as my 'hildren. %here is something singular enough in their (istory! but I have not now time to recount it.: %he .aster of the (ouse! notwithstanding the *implicity which discovered itself in Adams, new too much of the #orld to give a hasty 1elief to "rofessions. (e was not yet quite certain that Adams had any more of the 'lergyman in him than his 'assoc . %o try him therefore further! he as ed him! :if .r. Pope had lately published any thing new=: Adams answered! he had heard great 'ommendations of that "oet! but that he had never read! nor new any of his #or s.: :(oB hoB: says the 4entleman to himself! :have I caught you=: :#hat!: said he! :have you never seen his 1omer=: Adams answered :he had never read any %ranslation of the 'lassic s.: :#hy truly!: reply+d the 4entleman! :there is a &ignity in the #ree" $anguage which I thin no modern %ongue can reach.: :&o you understand #ree", *ir!: said Adams hastily. :A little *ir!: answered the 4entleman. :&o you now! *ir! where I can buy an Cschylus, an unluc y .isfortune lately happened to mine.: Cschylus was beyond the 4entleman! tho+ he new him very well by /ame; he therefore returning bac to 1omer, as ed Adams :what "art of the Iliad he thought most excellent.: Adams

return+d! :(is >uestion would be properer! what ind of 1eauty was the chief in "oetry! for that 1omer was equally excellent in them all.: :And indeed what Cicero says of a complete ,rator! may well be applied to a great "oet; who ought to comprehend all "erfections. Indeed 1omer did this in the most excellent degree; it is not without Reason therefore that the "hilosopher! in the FFd 'hap. of his "oetic s! mentions him by no other Appellation than that of (he Poet- (e was the )ather of the &rama! as well as the Epic- /ot of %ragedy only! but of 'omedy also; for his $argites, which is deplorably lost! bore! says Aristotle, the same Analogy to 'omedy! as his ,dyssey and Iliad to %ragedy. %o him therefore we owe Aristophanes, as well as &uripides, 'ophocles, and my poor Cschylus. 1ut if you please we will confine ourselves 8at least for the present9 to the Iliad! his noblest #or ; tho+ neither Aristotle, nor 1orace give it the "reference! as I remember! to the ,dyssey. )irst then as to his *ub7ect! can any thing be more simple! and at the same time more noble= (e is rightly praised by the first of those 7udicious 'ritics! for not chusing the whole #ar! which! tho+ he says! it hath a compleat 1eginning and End! would have been too great for the @nderstanding to comprehend at one View. I have therefore often wondered why so correct a #riter as 1orace should in his Epistle to Lollius call him the (ro=ani %elli 'criptorem. *econdly! his Action! termed by Aristotle Pragmaton 'ystasis; is it possible for the .ind of .an to conceive an Idea of such perfect @nity! and at the same time so replete with 4reatness= And here I must observe what I do not remember to have seen noted by any! the 1armotton, that agreement of his Action to his *ub7ect- )or as the *ub7ect is Anger! how agreeable is his Action! which is #ar= from which every Incident arises! and to which every Episode immediately relates. %hirdly! (is .anners! which Aristotle places second in his &escription of the several "arts of %ragedy! and which he says are included in the Action; I am at a loss whether I should rather admire the Exactness of his ?udgment in the nice &istinction! or the Immensity of his Imagination in their Variety. )or! as to the former of these! how accurately is the sedate! in7ured Resentment of Achilles distinguished from the hot insulting "assion of Agamemnon= (ow widely doth the brutal 'ourage of A=a8 differ from the amiable 1ravery of )iomedes; and the #isdom of estor, which is the Result of long Reflection and Experience! from the 'unning of Dlysses, the Effect of Art and *ubtilty only. If we consider their Variety! we may cry out with Aristotle in his FGth 'hapter! that no "art of this divine "oem is destitute of .anners. Indeed I might affirm! that there is scarce a 'haracter in human /ature untouched in some part or other. And as there is no "assion which he is not able to describe! so is there none in his Reader which he cannot raise. If he hath any superior Excellence to the rest! I have been inclined to fancy it is in the "athetic . I am sure I never read with dry Eyes! the two Episodes! where Andromache is introduced! in the former lamenting the &anger! and in the latter the &eath of 1ector. %he Images are so extremely tender in these! that I am convinced! the "oet had the worthiest and best (eart imaginable. As to his *entiments and &iction! I need say nothing; the former are particularly remar able for the utmost "erfection on that (ead! namely "ropriety; and as to the latter! Aristotle, whom doubtless you have read over and over! is very diffuse. I shall mention but one thing more! which that great 'ritic in his &ivision of %ragedy calls Opsis, or the *cenery! and which is as proper to the Epic as to the &rama! with this difference! that in the former it falls to the share of the "oet! and in the latter to that of the "ainter. 1ut did ever "ainter imagine a *cene li e that in the LNth and LGth Iliads= where the Reader sees at one View the "rospect of (roy, with the Army drawn up before it; the #recian Army! 'amp! and )leet! !upiter sitting on .ount .da, with his (ead wrapt in a 'loud! and a %hunderbolt in his (and loo ing towards (hrace; eptune driving through the *ea! which divides on each side to permit his "assage! and then seating himself on .ount 'amos- %he (eavens opened! and the &eities all seated on their %hrones. %his is *ublimeB %his is "oetryB: (e then rapt out a hundred #ree" Verses! +till the 4entleman was so far from entertaining any further suspicion of Adams, that he now doubted whether he had not a 1ishop in his (ouse. %he 4oodness of his (eart began therefore to dilate without any further Restraint. (e said he had great 'ompassion for the poor young #oman! who loo ed pale and faint with her ?ourney; and in truth he conceived a much higher ,pinion of her >uality than it deserved. (e said! he was sorry he could not accommodate them all- 1ut if they were contented with his )ire0side! he would sit up with the .en! and the young #oman might! if she pleased! parta e his #ife+s 1ed! which he advis+d her to; for that they must wal upwards of a .ile to any (ouse of Entertainment! and that not very good neither. Adams, who li ed his *eat! his Ale! his %obacco and his 'ompany! persuaded -anny to accept this ind "roposal! in which *ollicitation he was seconded by !oseph.

/or was she very difficultly prevailed on! $ove itself being scarce able to eep her Eyes open any longer. %he ,ffer therefore being indly accepted! the good #oman produced every thing eatable in her (ouse on the %able! while the 4uests being heartily invited! as heartily regaled themselves! especially "arson Adams. As to the other two! they were Examples of the %ruth of that physical ,bservation! that $ove! li e other sweet %hings! is no #hetter of the *tomach. *upper was no sooner ended! than -anny at her own Request retired! and the good #oman bore her 'ompany. %he .an of the (ouse! Adams and !oseph, who would modestly have withdrawn! had not the 4entleman insisted on the contrary! drew round the )ire0side! where Adams, 8to use his own #ords9 replenished his "ipe! and the 4entleman produced a 1ottle of excellent 1eer! being the best $iquor in his (ouse. %he modest 1ehaviour of !oseph, with the 4racefulness of his "erson! the 'haracter which Adams gave of him! and the )riendship he seemed to entertain for him! began to wor on the 4entleman+s Affections! and raised in him a 'uriosity to now the *ingularity which Adams had mentioned in his (istory. %his 'uriosity Adams was no sooner informed of! than with !oseph*s 'onsent! he agreed to gratify it! and accordingly related all he new! with as much %enderness as was possible for the 'haracter of $ady %ooby; and concluded with the long! faithful and mutual "assion between him and -anny, not concealing the .eanness of her 1irth and Education. %hese latter 'ircumstances entirely cured a ?ealousy which had lately risen in the 4entleman+s .ind! that -anny was the &aughter of some "erson of )ashion! and that !oseph had run away with her! and Adams was concerned in the "lot. (e was now enamour+d of his 4uests! dran their (ealths with great 'heerfulness! and return+d many %han s to Adams, who had spent much 1reath; for he was a circumstantial %eller of a *tory. A)A$' told him it was now in his power to return that )avour; for his extraordinary 4oodness! as well as that )und of $iterature he was .aster of! which he did not expect to find under such a Roof! had raised in him more 'uriosity than he had ever nown. %herefore! said he! if it be not too troublesome! *ir! your (istory! if you please. %he 4entleman answered! he could not refuse him what he had so much Right to insist on; and after some of the common Apologies! which are the usual "reface to a *tory! he thus began. '(A". III. .n which the #entleman relates the 1istory of his Life. *ir! I am descended of a good )amily! and was born a 4entleman. .y Education was liberal! and at a public *chool! in which I proceeded so far as to become .aster of the Latin, and to be tolerably versed in the #ree" $anguage. .y )ather died when I was sixteen! and lest me .aster of myself. (e bequeathed me a moderate )ortune! which he intended I should not receive till I attained the Age of twenty0five- )or he constantly asserted that was full early enough to give up any .an entirely to the 4uidance of his own &iscretion. (owever! as this Intention was so obscurely worded in his #ill! that the $awyers advised me to contest the "oint with my %rustees! I own I paid so little Regard to the Inclinations of my dead )ather! which were sufficiently certain to me! that I followed their Advice! and soon succeeded- )or the %rustees did not contest the .atter very obstinately on their side. :*ir!: said Adams, :.ay I crave the )avour of your /ame=: %he 4entleman answer+d! :his /ame was Wilson,: and then proceeded. I stay+d a very little while at *chool after his &eath; for being a forward Aouth! I was extremely impatient to be in the #orld- )or which I thought my "arts! 2nowledge! and .anhood thoroughly qualified me. And to this early Introduction into $ife! without a 4uide! I impute all my future .isfortunes; for besides the obvious .ischiefs which attend this! there is one which hath not been so generally observed. %he first Impression which .an ind receives of you! will be very difficult to eradicate. (ow unhappy! therefore! must it be to fix your 'haracter in $ife! before you can possibly now its Value! or weigh the 'onsequences of those Actions which are to establish your future Reputation= A little under seventeen I left my *chool and went to London, with no more than six "ounds in my "oc et. A great *um as I then conceived; and which I was afterwards surpri5ed to find so soon consumed.

%he 'haracter I was ambitious of attaining! was that of a fine 4entleman; the first Requisites to which! I apprehended were to be supplied by a %aylor! a "eriwig0ma er! and some few more %radesmen! who deal in furnishing out the human 1ody. /otwithstanding the $owness of my "urse! I found 'redit with them more easily than I expected! and was soon equipped to my #ish. %his I own then agreeably surpri5ed me; but I have since learn+d! that it is a .axim among many %radesmen at that polite End of the %own to deal as largely as they can! rec on as high as they can! and arrest as soon as they can. %he next >ualifications! namely &ancing! )encing! Riding the great (orse! and .usic ! came into my head; but as they required Expence and %ime! I comforted myself! with regard to &ancing! that I had learned a little in my Aouth! and could wal a .inuet genteelly enough; as to )encing! I thought my 4ood0(umour would preserve me from the &anger of a >uarrel; as to the (orse! I hoped it would not be thought of; and for .usic ! I imagined I could easily acquire the Reputation of it; for I had heard some of my *chool0fellows pretend to 2nowledge in ,peras! without being able to sing or play on the )iddle. 2nowledge of the %own seemed another Ingredient; this I thought I should arrive at by frequenting public "laces. Accordingly I paid constant Attendance to them all; by which means I was soon .aster of the fashionable "hrases! learn+d to cry up the fashionable &iversions! and new the /ames and )aces of the most fashionable .en and #omen. /othing now seemed to remain but an Intrigue! which I was resolved to have immediately; I mean the Reputation of it; and indeed I was so successful! that in a very short time I had half a do5en with the finest #omen in %own. At these #ords Adams fetched a deep 4roan! and then blessing himself! cry+d out! #ood LordB What wic"ed (imes these are3 /ot so wic ed as you imagine! continued the 4entleman; for I assure you! they were all Vestal Virgins for any thing which I new to the contrary. %he Reputation of Intriguing with them was all I sought! and was what I arriv+d at- and perhaps I only flattered myself even in that; for very probably the "ersons to whom I shewed their 1illets! new as well as I! that they were 'ounterfeits! and that I had written them to myself. :W7.(& Letters to yourselfB: said Adams staringB , sir! answered the 4entleman! .t is the &rror of the (imes. (alf our modern "lays have one of these 'haracters in them. It is incredible the "ains I have ta en! and the absurd .ethods I employed to traduce the 'haracter of #omen of &istinction. #hen another had spo en in Raptures of any one! I have answered! :& <n her! sheB #e shall have her at 1;d*s very soon.: #hen he hath reply+d! :he thought her virtuous!: I have answered! :Ay! thou wilt always thin a #oman virtuous! till she is in the *treets! but you and I! !ac" or (om, 8turning to another in 'ompany9 now better.: At which I have drawn a "aper out of my "oc et! perhaps a %aylor+s 1ill! and issed it! crying at the same time! %y #ad . was once fond of her. :"roceed! if you please! but do not swear any more!: said Adams . *ir! said the 4entleman! I as your "ardon. #ell! *ir! in this 'ourse of $ife I continued full three Aears!< :#hat 'ourse of $ife!: answered Adams; :I do not remember you have yet mentioned any.: <Aour Remar is 7ust! said the 4entleman smiling! I should rather have said! in this 'ourse of doing nothing. I remember some time afterwards I wrote the ?ournal of one &ay! which would serve! I believe! as well for any other! during the whole %ime; I will endeavour to repeat it to you. In the .orning I arose! too my great *tic ! and wal ed out in my green )roc with my (air in "apers! 8 a #roan from Adams9 and sauntered about till ten. #ent to the Auction; told $ady <she had a dirty )ace; laughed heartily at something 'aptain<said; I can+t remember what! for I did not very well hear it; whispered $ord<; bowed to the &u e of<; and was going to bid for a *nuff0box; but did not! for fear I should have had it. )rom F to G! drest myself. A 4roan. )rom G to O! dined. A 4roan. )rom O to K! 'offee0house. )rom K to P! )rury,Lane "lay0house. )rom P to LI! Lincoln*s,.nn,-ields.

)rom LI to LF! &rawing0Room. At all which "laces nothing happened worth Remar . At which Adams having fetched a great 4roan! said with some Vehemence! :*ir! this is below the $ife of an Animal! hardly above Vegetation; and I am surpri5ed what could lead a .an of your *ense into it.: #hat leads us into more )ollies than you imagine! &octor! answered the 4entleman; Vanity- )or as contemptible a 'reature as I was! and I assure you! yourself cannot have more 'ontempt for such a #retch than I now have! I then admir+d myself! and should have despised a "erson of your present Appearance 8you will pardon me9 with all your $earning! and those excellent >ualities which I have remar ed in you. Adams bowed! and begged him to proceed. After I had continued two Aears in this 'ourse of $ife! said the 4entleman! an Accident happened which obliged me to change the *cene. As I was one day at 't. !ames*s 'offee0house! ma ing very free with the 'haracter of a young $ady of >uality! an ,fficer of the 4uards who was present! thought proper to give me the lye. I answered! I might possibly be mista en; but I intended to tell no more than the %ruth. %o which he made no Reply! but by a scornful *neer. After this I observed a strange 'oldness in all my Acquaintance; none of them spo e to me first! and very few returned me even the 'ivility of a 1ow. %he 'ompany I used to dine with! left me out! and within a #ee I found myself in as much *olitude at 't. !ames*s, as if I had been in a &esart. An honest elderly .an at last told me! he had a 'ompassion for my Aouth! and therefore advised me to shew the #orld I was not such a Rascal as they thought me to be. I did not at first understand him- 1ut he explained himself! and ended with telling me! if I would write a 'hallenge to the 'aptain! he would out of pure 'harity go to him with it. :A very charitable "erson trulyB: cried Adams. I desired till the next &ay! continued the 4entleman! to consider on it! and retiring to my $odgings! I weighed the 'onsequences on both sides as fairly as I could. ,n the one! I saw the Ris of this Alternative! either losing my own $ife! or having on my hands the 1lood of a .an with whom I was not in the least angry. I soon determined that the 4ood which appeared on the other! was not worth this (a5ard. I therefore resolved to quit the *cene! and presently retired to the (emple, where I too 'hambers. (ere I soon got a fresh *et of Acquaintance! who new nothing of what had happened to me. Indeed they were not greatly to my Approbation; for the 1eaus of the (emple are only the *hadows of the others. %hey are the Affectation of Affectation. %he Vanity of these is still more ridiculous! if possible! than of the others. (ere I met with smart )ellows who dran with $ords they did not now! and intrigued with #omen they never saw. Covent,#arden was now the farthest *tretch of my Ambition! where I shone forth in the 1alconies at the "lay0houses! visited #hores! made $ove to ,range0#enches! and damned "lays. %his 'areer was soon put a stop to by my *urgeon! who convinced me of the /ecessity of confining myself to my Room for a .onth. At the End of which! having had $eisure to reflect! I resolved to quit any further 'onversation with 1eaus and *marts of all inds! and to avoid! if possible! any ,ccasion of returning to this "lace of 'onfinement. :I thin !: said Adams, :the Advice of a .onth+s Retirement and Reflection was very proper; but I should rather have expected it from a &ivine than a *urgeon.: %he 4entleman smiled at Adams*s *implicity! and without explaining himself farther on such an odious *ub7ect went on thus- I was no sooner perfectly restored to (ealth! than I found my "assion for #omen! which I was afraid to satisfy as I had done! made me very uneasy; I determined therefore to eep a .istress. /or was I long before I fixed my 'hoice on a young #oman! who had before been ept by two 4entlemen! and to whom I was recommended by a celebrated 1awd. I too her home to my 'hambers! and made her a *ettlement! during 'ohabitation. %his would perhaps have been very ill paid- (owever! she did not suffer me to be perplexed on this account; for before >uarter0day! I found her at my 'hambers in too familiar 'onversation with a young )ellow who was drest li e an ,fficer! but was indeed a 'ity Apprentice. Instead of excusing her Inconstancy! she rapped out half a do5en ,aths! and snapping her )ingers at me! swore she scorned to confine herself to the best .an in &ngland. @pon this we parted! and the same 1awd presently provided her another 2eeper. I was not so much concerned at our *eparation! as I found within a &ay or two I had Reason to be for our .eeting- )or I was obliged to pay a second Visit to my *urgeon. I was now oblig+d to do "enance for some #ee s! during which %ime I contracted an Acquaintance with a beautiful young 4irl! the &aughter of a 4entleman! who after having been GI Aears in the Army! and in all the 'ampaigns under the &u e of $arlborough, died a $ieutenant on (alf0"ay; and had left a #idow with this only 'hild! in very distrest 'ircumstances- they had only a small "ension from the 4overnment! with

what little the &aughter could add to it by her #or ; for she had great Excellence at her /eedle. %his 4irl was! at my first Acquaintance with her! sollicited in .arriage by a young )ellow in good 'ircumstances. (e was Apprentice to a $inen0draper! and had a little )ortune sufficient to set up his %rade. %he .other was greatly pleased with this .atch! as indeed she had sufficient Reason. (owever! I soon prevented it. I represented him in so low a $ight to his .istress! and made so good an @se of )lattery! "romises! and "resents! that! not to dwell longer on this *ub7ect than is necessary! I prevailed with the poor 4irl! and convey+d her away from her .otherB In a word! I debauched her. <8At which #ords! Adams started up! fetch+d three *trides cross the Room! and then replaced himself in his 'hair.9 Aou are not more affected with this "art of my *tory than myself- I assure you it will never be sufficiently repented of in my own ,pinion1ut if you already detest it! how much more will your Indignation be raised when you hear the fatal 'onsequences of this barbarous! this villainous Action= If you please therefore! I will here desist. <:1y no means!: cries Adams, :4o on! I beseech you! and (eaven grant you may sincerely repent of this and many other things you have related.: <I was now! continued the 4entleman! as happy as the "ossession of a fine young 'reature! who had a good Education! and was endued with many agreeable >ualities! could ma e me. #e liv+d some .onths with vast )ondness together! without any 'ompany or 'onversation more than we found in one another- 1ut this could not continue always; and tho+ I still preserved a great Affection for her! I began more and more to want the Relief of other 'ompany! and consequently to leave her by degrees! at last! whole &ays to herself. *he failed not to testify some @neasiness on these ,ccasions! and complained of the melancholy $ife she led; to remedy which! I introduced her into the Acquaintance of some other ept .istresses! with whom she used to play at 'ards! and frequent "lays and other &iversions. *he had not liv+d long in this Intimacy! before I perceived a visible Alteration in her 1ehaviour; all her .odesty and Innocence vanished by degrees! till her .ind became thoroughly tainted. *he affected the 'ompany of Ra es! gave herself all manner of Airs! was never easy but abroad! or when she had a "arty at my 'hambers. *he was rapacious of .oney! extravagant to Excess! loose in her 'onversation; and if ever I demurred to any of her &emands! ,aths! %ears! and )its! were the immediate 'onsequences. As the first Raptures of )ondness were long since over! this 1ehaviour soon estranged my Affections from her; I began to reflect with pleasure that she was not my #ife! and to conceive an Intention of parting with her! of which having given her a (int! she too care to prevent me the "ains of turning her out of doors! and accordingly departed herself! having first bro en open my Escrutore! and ta en with her all she could find! to the Amount of about FII l. In the first (eat of my Resentment! I resolved to pursue her with all the Vengeance of the $aw- 1ut as she had the good $uc to escape me during that )erment! my "assion afterwards cooled! and having reflected that I had been the first Aggressor! and had done her an In7ury for which I could ma e her no Reparation! by robbing her of the Innocence of her .ind; and hearing at the same time that the poor old #oman her .other had bro e her (eart! on her &aughter+s Elopement from her! I concluding myself her .urderer 8:As you very well might!: cries Adams, with a 4roan;9 I was pleased that 4od Almighty had ta en this .ethod of punishing me! and resolved quietly to submit to the $oss. Indeed I could wish I had never heard more of the poor 'reature! who became in the end an abandoned "rofligate; and after being some Aears a common "rostitute! at last ended her miserable $ife in ewgate. < (ere the 4entleman fetch+d a deep *igh! which .r. Adams echo+d very loudly! and both continued silent loo ing on each other for some .inutes. At last the 4entleman proceeded thus- I had been perfectly constant to this 4irl! during the whole %ime I ept her- 1ut she had scarce departed before I discovered more .ar s of her Infidelity to me! than the $oss of my .oney. In short! I was forced to ma e a third Visit to my *urgeon! out of whose hands I did not get a hasty &ischarge. I now forswore all future &ealings with the *ex! complained loudly that the "leasure did not compensate the "ain! and railed at the beautiful 'reatures! in as gross $anguage as !uvenal himself formerly reviled them in. I loo ed on all the %own0(arlots with a &etestation not easy to be conceived! their "ersons appeared to me as painted "alaces inhabited by &isease and &eath- /or could their 1eauty ma e them more desirable ,b7ects in my Eyes! than 4ilding could ma e me covet a "ill! or golden "lates a 'offin. 1ut tho+ I was no longer the absolute *lave! I found some Reasons to own myself still the *ub7ect of $ove. .y (atred for #omen decreased daily; and I am not positive but %ime might have betrayed me again to some common (arlot! had I not been secured by a "assion for the charming 'aphira; which having once entered upon! made a violent "rogress in my (eart. 'aphira was #ife to a .an of )ashion and 4allantry! and one who seemed! I own!

every way worthy of her Affections! which however he had not the Reputation of having. *he was indeed a CoBuette achevGe. :"ray *ir!: says Adams, :#hat is a 'oquette= I have met with the #ord in -rench Authors! but never could assign any Idea to it. I believe it is the same with une 'otte, Anglic6 a -ool.: *ir! answer+d the 4entleman! perhaps you are not much mista en- but as it is a particular ind of )olly! I will endeavour to describe it. #ere all 'reatures to be ran ed in the ,rder of 'reation! according to their @sefulness! I now few Animals that would not ta e place of a 'oquette; nor indeed hath this 'reature much "retence to any thing beyond Instinct- for tho+ sometimes we might imagine it was animated by the "assion of Vanity! yet far the greater part of its Actions fall beneath even that low .otive; )or instance! several absurd 4estures and %ric s! infinitely more foolish than what can be observed in the most ridiculous 1irds and 1easts! and which would persuade the 1eholder that the silly #retch was aiming at our 'ontempt. Indeed its 'haracteristic is Affectation! and this led and governed by #him only- for as 1eauty! #isdom! #it! 4ood0nature! "oliteness and (ealth are sometimes affected by this 'reature; so are @gliness! )olly! /onsense! Ill0nature! Ill0breeding and *ic ness li ewise put on by it in their %urn. Its $ife is one constant $ye! and the only Rule by which you can form any ?udgment of them is! that they are never what they seem. If it was possible for a 'oquette to love 8as it is not! for if ever it attains this "assion! the 'oquette ceases instantly9 it would wear the )ace of Indifference if not of hatred to the beloved ,b7ect; you may therefore be assured! when they endeavour to persuade you of their li ing! that they are indifferent to you at least. And indeed this was the 'ase of my 'aphira, who no sooner saw me in the number of her Admirers! than she gave me what is commonly called Encouragement; she would often loo at me! and when she perceived me meet her Eyes! would instantly ta e them off! discovering at the same time as much *urpri5e and Emotion as possible. %hese Arts failed not of the *uccess she intended; and as I grew more particular to her than the rest of her Admirers! she advanced in proportion more directly to me than to the others. *he affected the low Voice! #hisper! $isp! *igh! *tart! $augh! and many other Indications of "assion! which daily deceive thousands. #hen I play+d at #his with her! she would loo earnestly at me! and at the same time lose &eal or revo e; then burst into a ridiculous $augh! and cry! I would not have you guess what I was thin ing of for the #orld. %o detain you no longer! after I had gone through a sufficient 'ourse of 4allantry! as I thought! and was thoroughly convinced I had raised a violent "assion in my .istress; I sought an ,pportunity of coming to an Eclaircissement with her. *he avoided this as much as possible! however great Assiduity at length presented me one. I will not describe all the "articulars of this Interview; let it suffice! that till she could no longer pretend not to see my &rift! she first affected a violent *urpri5e! and immediately after as violent a "assion- *he wondered what I had seen in her 'onduct! which could induce me to affront her in this manner- And brea ing from me the first .oment she could! told me! I had no other way to escape the 'onsequence of her Resentment! than by never seeing! or at least spea ing to her more. I was not contented with this Answer; I still pursued her! but to no purpose! and was at length convinced that her (usband had the sole "ossession of her "erson! and that neither he nor any other had made any Impression on her (eart. I was ta en off from following this .gnis -atuus by some Advances which were made me by the #ife of a 'iti5en! who tho neither very young nor handsome! was yet too agreeable to be re7ected by my amorous 'onstitution. I accordingly soon satisfy+d her! that she had not cast away her (ints on a barren or cold *oil; on the contrary! they instantly produced her an eager and desiring $over. /or did she give me any Reason to complain; she met the #armth she had raised with equal Ardour. I had no longer a 'oquette to deal with! but one who was wiser than to prostitute the noble "assion of $ove to the ridiculous $ust of Vanity. #e presently understood one another; and as the "leasures we sought lay in a mutual 4ratification! we soon found and en7oyed them. I thought myself at first greatly happy in the possession of this new .istress! whose )ondness would have quic ly surfeited a more sic ly Appetite! but it had a different Effect on mine; she carried my "assion higher by it than Aouth or Vanity had been able- 1ut my (appiness could not long continue uninterrupted. %he Apprehensions we lay under from the ?ealousy of her (usband! gave us great @neasiness. :"oor #retchB I pity him!: cry+d Adams. (e did indeed deserve it said the 4entleman! for he loved his #ife with great %enderness! and I assure you it is a great *atisfaction to me that I was not the .an who first seduced her Affections from him. %hese Apprehensions appeared also too well grounded; for in the End he discovered us! and procur+d #itnesses of our 'aresses. (e then prosecuted me at $aw! and recovered NIIIl. &amages! which much distressed my )ortune to pay- and what was worse! his #ife being divorced!

came upon my hands. I led a very uneasy $ife with her; for besides that my "assion was now much abated! her excessive ?ealousy was very troublesome. At length &eath rid me of an Inconvenience! which the 'onsideration of my having been the Author of her .isfortunes! would never suffer me to ta e any other .ethod of discarding. I now bid adieu to $ove! and resolved to pursue other less dangerous and expensive "leasures. I fell into the Acquaintance of a *et of 7olly 'ompanions! who slept all &ay and dran all /ight- )ellows who might rather be said to consume %ime than to live. %heir best 'onversation was nothing but /oise- *inging! hollowing! #rangling! &rin ing! %oasting! *p<wing! *mo ing! were the chief Ingredients of our Entertainment. And yet bad as these were! they were more tolerable than our graver *cenes! which were either excessive tedious /arratives of dull common .atters of )act! or hot &isputes about trifling .atters! which commonly ended in a #ager. %his #ay of $ife the first serious Reflection put a period to! and I now became .ember of a 'lub frequented by young .en of great Abilities. %he 1ottle was now only called in to the Assistance of our 'onversation! which rolled on the deepest "oints of "hilosophy. %hese 4entlemen were engaged in a *earch after %ruth! in the "ursuit of which they threw aside all the "re7udices of Education! and governed themselves only by the infallible 4uide of (uman Reason. %his great 4uide! after having shewn them the )alshood of that very antient but simple %enet! that there is such a 1eing as a &eity in the @niverse! helped them to establish in his stead a certain 7ule of 7ight, by adhering to which they all arrived at the utmost "urity of .orals. Reflection made me as much delighted with this *ociety! as it had taught me to despise and detest the former. I began now to esteem myself a 1eing of a higher ,rder than I had ever before conceived! and was the more charmed with this Rule of Right! as I really found in my own /ature nothing repugnant to it. I held in utter 'ontempt all "ersons who wanted any other Inducement to Virtue besides her intrinsic 1eauty and Excellence; and had so high an ,pinion of my present 'ompanions! with regard to their .orality! that I would have trusted them with whatever was nearest and dearest to me. #hilst I was engaged in this delightful &ream! two or three Accidents happen+d successively! which at first much surpri5ed me. )or! one of our greatest "hilosophers! or 7ule of 7ight,men withdrew himself from us! ta ing with him the #ife of one of his most intimate )riends. *econdly! Another of the same *ociety left the 'lub without remembring to ta e leave of his 1ail. A third having borrowed a *um of .oney of me! for which I received no *ecurity! when I as ed him to repay it! absolutely denied the $oan. %hese several "ractices! so inconsistent with our golden Rule! made me begin to suspect its Infallibility; but when I communicated my %houghts to one of the 'lub! he said there was nothing absolutely good or evil in itself; that Actions were denominated good or bad by the 'ircumstances of the Agent. %hat possibly the .an who ran away with his /eighbour+s #ife might be one of very good Inclinations! but over0prevailed on by the Violence of an unruly "assion! and in other "articulars might be a very worthy .ember of *ociety- %hat if the 1eauty of any #oman created in him an @neasiness! he had a Right from /ature to relieve himself; with many other things! which I then detested so much! that I too $eave of the *ociety that very Evening! and never returned to it again. 1eing now reduced to a *tate of *olitude! which I did not li e! I became a great )requenter of the "lay0houses! which indeed was always my favourite &iversion! and most Evenings past away two or three (ours behind the *cenes! where I met with several "oets! with whom I made Engagements at the %averns. *ome of the "layers were li ewise of our "arties. At these .eetings we were generally entertain+d by the "oets with reading their "erformances! and by the "layers with repeating their "arts- @pon which ,ccasions! I observed the 4entleman who furnished our Entertainment! was commonly the best pleased of the 'ompany; who! tho+ they were pretty civil to him to his )ace! seldom failed to ta e the first ,pportunity of his Absence to ridicule him. /ow I made some Remar s! which probably are too obvious to be worth relating. :*ir!: says Adams, :your Remar s if you please.: )irst then! says he! I concluded that the general ,bservation! that #its are most inclined to Vanity! is not true. .en are equally vain of Riches! *trength! 1eauty! (onours! :c. 1ut! these appear of themselves to the Eyes of the 1eholders! whereas the poor #it is obliged to produce his "erformance to shew you his "erfection! and on his Readiness to do this that vulgar opinion I have before mentioned is grounded1ut doth not the "erson who expends vast *ums in the )urniture of his (ouse! or the ,rnaments of his "erson! who consumes much %ime! and employs great "ains in dressing himself! or who thin s himself paid for *elf0&enial! $abour! or even Villany by a %itle or a Ribbon! sacrifice as much to Vanity as the poor #it! who is desirous to read you his "oem or his "lay= .y second Remar was! that Vanity is the worst of

"assions! and more apt to contaminate the .ind than any other- )or as *elfishness is much more general than we please to allow it! so it is natural to hate and envy those who stand between us and the 4ood we desire. /ow in $ust and Ambition these are few; and even in Avarice we find many who are no ,bstacles to our "ursuits; but the vain .an see s "reeminence; and every thing which is excellent or praise0worthy in another! renders him the .ar of his Antipathy. Adams now began to fumble in his "oc ets! and soon cried out! , laB I have it not about me<@pon this the 4entleman as ing him what he was searching for! he said he searched after a *ermon! which he thought his .aster0piece! against Vanity. :)ie upon it! fie upon it!: cries he! :why do I ever leave that *ermon out of my "oc et; I wish it was within five .iles! I would willingly fetch it! to read it to you.: %he 4entleman answered! that there was no need! for he was cured of the "assion. :And for that very Reason!: quoth Adams, :I would read it! for I am confident you would admire it- Indeed! I have never been a greater Enemy to any "assion than that simple one of Vanity.: %he 4entleman smiled! and proceeded<)rom this *ociety I easily past to that of the 4amesters! where nothing remar able happened! but the finishing my )ortune! which those 4entlemen soon helped me to the End of. %his opened *cenes of $ife hitherto un nown; "overty and &istress with their horrid %rain of &uns! Attorneys! 1ailiffs! haunted me &ay and /ight. .y 'lothes grew shabby! my 'redit bad! my )riends and Acquaintance of all inds cold. In this *ituation the strangest %hought imaginable came into my (ead; and what was this! but to write a "lay= for I had sufficient $eisure; )ear of 1ailiffs confined me every &ay to my Room; and having always had a little Inclination and something of a 4enius that way! I set myself to wor ! and within few .onths produced a "iece of five Acts! which was accepted of at the %heatre. I remembred to have formerly ta en %ic ets of other "oets for their 1enefits long before the Appearance of their "erformances! and resolving to follow a "recedent! which was so well suited to my present 'ircumstances; I immediately provided myself with a large /umber of little "apers. (appy indeed would be the *tate of "oetry! would these %ic ets pass current at the 1a ehouse! the Ale0(ouse! and the 'handler+s0*hop- 1ut alasB far otherwise; no %aylor will ta e them in "ayment for 1uc ram! *tays! *tay0tape; nor no 1ailiff for 'ivility0.oney. %hey are indeed no more than a "assport to beg with! a 'ertificate that the ,wner wants five *hillings! which induces well0disposed 'hristians to 'harity. I now experienced what is worse than "overty! or rather what is the worst 'onsequence of "overty! I mean Attendance and &ependance on the 4reat. .any a .orning have I waited (ours in the cold "arlours of .en of >uality! where after seeing the lowest Rascals in $ace and Embroidery! the "imps and 1uffoons in )ashion admitted! I have been sometimes told on sending in my /ame! that my $ord could not possibly see me this .orning- A sufficient Assurance that I should never more get entrance into that (ouse. *ometimes I have been at last admitted! and the great .an hath thought proper to excuse himself! by telling me he was tied up . :(ied up,: says Adams, :pray what+s that=: *ir! says the 4entleman! the "rofit which 1oo sellers allowed Authors for the best #or s! was so very small! that certain .en of 1irth and )ortune some Aears ago! who were the "atrons of #it and $earning! thought fit to encourage them farther! by entring into voluntary *ubscriptions for their Encouragement. %hus Prior, 7owe, Pope, and some other .en of 4enius! received large *ums for their $abours from the "ublic. %his seemed so easy a .ethod of getting .oney! that many of the lowest *criblers of the %imes ventured to publish their #or s in the same #ay; and many had even the Assurance to ta e in *ubscriptions for what was never writ nor intended. *ubscriptions in this manner growing infinite! and a ind of %ax on the "ublic; some "ersons finding it not so easy a %as to discern good from bad Authors! or to now what 4enius was worthy Encouragement! and what was not! to prevent the Expence of *ubscribing to so many! invented a .ethod to excuse themselves from all *ubscriptions whatever; and this was to receive a small *um of .oney in consideration of giving a large one if ever they subscribed; which many have done! and many more have pretended to have done! in order to silence all *ollicitation. %he same .ethod was li ewise ta en with "lay0house %ic ets! which were no less a public 4rievance; and this is what they call being tied up from subscribing. :I can+t say but the %erm is apt enough! and somewhat typical! said Adams; for a .an of large )ortune! who ties himself up! as you call it! from the Encouragement of .en of .erit! ought to be tied up in reality.: #ell! *ir! says the 4entlemen! to return to my *tory. *ometimes I have received a 4uinea from a .an of >uality! given with as ill a 4race as Alms are generally to the meanest 1eggar! and purchased too with as much %ime spent in Attendance! as! if it had been spent in honest Industry! might have brought me more "rofit with infinitely more *atisfaction. After about two .onths spent in this disagreeable way with the utmost .ortification!

when I was pluming my (opes on the "rospect of a plentiful (arvest from my "lay! upon applying to the "rompter to now when it came into Rehearsal! he informed me he had received ,rders from the .anagers to return me the "lay again; for that they could not possibly act it that *eason; but if I would ta e it and revise it against the next! they would be glad to see it again. I snatch+d it from him with great Indignation! and retired to my Room! where I threw myself on the 1ed in a )it of &espair<:Aou should rather have thrown yourself on your 2nees!: says Adams; :for &espair is sinful.: As soon! continued the 4entleman! as I had indulged the first %umult of my "assion! I began to consider coolly what 'ourse I should ta e! in a *ituation without )riends! .oney! 'redit or Reputation of any ind. After revolving many things in my .ind! I could see no other "ossibility of furnishing myself with the miserable /ecessaries of $ife than to retire to a 4arret near the %emple! and commence (ac ney0writer to the $awyers; for which I was well qualify+d! being an excellent "enman. %his "urpose I resolved on! and immediately put it in execution. I had an Acquaintance with an Attorney who had formerly transacted Affairs for me! and to him I applied- 1ut instead of furnishing me with any 1usiness! he laugh+d at my @nderta ing! and told me :he was afraid I should turn his &eeds into "lays! and he should expect to see them on the *tage.: /ot to tire you with Instances of this ind from others! I found that Plato himself did not hold "oets in greater Abhorrence than these .en of 1usiness do. #henever I durst venture to a 'offee0house! which was on 'undays only! a #hisper ran round the Room! which was constantly attended with a *neer<(hat*s Poet Wilson- for I now not whether you have observed it! but there is a .alignity in the /ature of .an! which when not weeded out! or at least covered by a good Education and "oliteness! delights in ma ing another uneasy or dissatisfied with himself. %his abundantly appears in all Assemblies! except those which are filled by "eople of )ashion! and especially among the younger "eople of both *exes! whose 1irth and )ortunes place them 7ust without the polite 'ircles; I mean the lower 'lass of the 4entry! and the higher of the mercantile #orld! who are in reality the worst bred part of .an ind. #ell! *ir! whilst I continued in this miserable *tate! with scarce sufficient 1usiness to eep me from starving! the Reputation of a "oet being my 1ane! I accidentally became acquainted with a 1oo seller! who told me :it was a "ity a .an of my $earning and 4enius should be obliged to such a .ethod of getting his $ivelihood; that he had a 'ompassion for me! and if I would engage with him! he would underta e to provide handsomely for me.: A .an in my 'ircumstances! as he very well new! had no 'hoice. I accordingly accepted his "roposal with his 'onditions! which were none of the most favourable! and fell to translating with all my .ight. I had no longer reason to lament the want of 1usiness; for he furnished me with so much! that in half a Aear I almost writ myself blind. I li ewise contracted a &istemper by my sedentary $ife! in which no part of my 1ody was exercised but my right Arm! which rendered me incapable of writing for a long time. %his unluc ily happening to delay the "ublication of the #or ! and my last "erformance not having sold well! the 1oo seller declined any further Engagement! and aspersed me to his 1rethren as a careless! idle )ellow. I had however! by having half0wor +d and half0starv+d myself to death during the %ime I was in his *ervice! amassed a few 4uineas! with which I bought a $ottery0%ic et! resolving to throw myself into )ortune+s $ap! and try if she would ma e me amends for the In7uries she had done me at the 4aming0%able. %his "urchase being made left me almost pennyless; when! as if I had not been sufficiently miserable! a 1ailiff in #oman+s 'lothes got Admittance to my 'hamber! whither he was directed by the 1oo seller. (e arrested me at my %aylor+s *uit! for thirty0five "ounds; a *um for which I could not procure 1ail! and was therefore conveyed to his (ouse! where I was loc ed up in an upper 'hamber. I had now neither (ealth 8for I was scarce recovered from my Indisposition9 $iberty! .oney! or )riends; and had abandoned all (opes! and even the &esire of $ife. :1ut this could not last long!: said Adams, :for doubtless the %aylor released you the moment he was truly acquainted with your Affairs; and new that your 'ircumstances would not permit you to pay him.: ,h! *ir! answered the 4entleman! he new that before he arrested me; nay! he new that nothing but Incapacity could prevent me paying my &ebts; for I had been his 'ustomer many Aears! had spent vast *ums of .oney with him! and had always paid most punctually in my prosperous &ays- 1ut when I reminded him of this! with Assurance that if he would not molest my Endeavours! I would pay him all the .oney I could! by my utmost $abour and Industry! procure! reserving only what was sufficient to preserve me alive. (e answered! (is "atience was worn out; that I had put him off from time to time; that he wanted the .oney; that he had put it into a $awyer+s hands; and if I did not pay him immediately! or find *ecurity! I must lie in 4oal and expect no .ercy. :(e may expect .ercy!:

cries Adams starting from his 'hair! :where he will find none. (ow can such a #retch repeat the $ord+s "rayer! where the #ord which is translated! I now not for what Reason! (respasses, is in the ,riginal )ebts= And as surely as we do not forgive others their &ebts when they are unable to pay them; so surely shall we ourselves be unforgiven! when we are in no condition of paying.: (e ceased! and the 4entleman proceeded. #hile I was in this deplorable *ituation a former Acquaintance! to whom I had communicated my $ottery0%ic et! found me out! and ma ing me a Visit with great &elight in his 'ountenance! shoo me heartily by the (and! and wished me ?oy of my good )ortune- )or! says he! your %ic et is come up a "ri5e of NIIIl. Adams snapt his )ingers at these #ords in an Ecstasy of ?oy; which however did not continue long)or the 4entleman thus proceeded. AlasB *ir! this was only the %ric of )ortune to sin me the deeper- )or I had disposed of this $ottery0%ic et two &ays before to a Relation! who refused lending me a *hilling without it! in order to procure myself 1read. As soon as my )riend was acquainted with my unfortunate *ale! he began to revile me! and remind me of all the ill 'onduct and .iscarriages of my $ife. (e said! :I was one whom )ortune could not save! if she would; that I was now ruined without any (opes of Retrieval! nor must expect any "ity from my )riends; that it would be extreme #ea ness to compassionate the .isfortunes of a .an who ran headlong to his own &estruction.: (e then painted to me in as lively 'olours as he was able! the (appiness I should have now en7oyed! had I not foolishly disposed of my %ic et. I urg+d the "lea of /ecessity- 1ut he made no Answer to that! and began again to revile me! till I could bear it no longer! and desired him to finish his Visit. I soon exchanged the 1ailiff+s (ouse for a "rison; where! as I had not .oney sufficient to procure me a separate Apartment! I was crouded in with a great number of miserable #retches! in common with whom I was destitute of every 'onvenience of $ife! even that which all the 1rutes en7oy! wholesome Air. In these dreadful 'ircumstances I applied by $etter to several of my old Acquaintance! and such to whom I had formerly lent .oney without any great "rospect of its being returned! for their Assistance; but in vain. An Excuse instead of a &enial was the gentlest Answer I received. <#hilst I languished in a 'ondition too horrible to be described! and which in a $and of (umanity! and! what is much more 'hristianity! seems a strange "unishment for a little Inadvertency and Indiscretion. #hilst I was in this 'ondition! a )ellow came one day into the "rison! and enquiring me out deliver+d me the following $etter'.7, $y -ather, to whom you sold your (ic"et in the last Lottery, died the same )ay in which it came up a Pri2e, as you have possibly heard, and left me sole 1eiress of all his -ortune. . am so much touched with your present Circumstances, and the Dneasiness you must feel at having been driven to dispose of what might have made you happy, that . must desire your Acceptance of the inclosed, and am 4our humble 'ervant, 1arriet 1earty. And what do you thin was inclosed= :I don+t now!: cried Adams - :/ot less than a 4uinea! I hope.: <*ir! it was a 1an 0/ote for FII l.< :FII l.: says Adams, in a RaptureB </o less! I assure you! answered the 4entleman; a *um I was not half so delighted with! as with the dear /ame of the generous 4irl that sent it me; and who was not only the best! but the handsomest 'reature in the @niverse; and for whom I had long had a "assion! which I never durst disclose to her. I iss+d her /ame a thousand times! my Eyes overflowing with %enderness and 4ratitude! I repeated<. 1ut not to detain you with these Raptures! I immediately acquired my $iberty! and having paid all my &ebts! departed with upwards of fifty "ounds in my "oc et! to than my ind &eliverer. *he happened to be then out of %own! a 'ircumstance which! upon Reflection! pleased me; for by that means I had an ,pportunity to appear before her in a more decent &ress. At her Return to %own within a &ay or two! I threw myself at her )eet with the most ardent Ac nowledgments! which she re7ected with an unfeigned 4reatness of .ind! and told me! I could not oblige her more than by never mentioning! or if possible! thin ing on a 'ircumstance which must bring to my .ind an Accident that might be grievous to me to thin on. *he proceeded thus- :#hat I have done is in my own eyes a %rifle! and perhaps infinitely less than would have become me to do. And if you thin of engaging in any 1usiness! where a larger *um may be serviceable to you! I shall not be over0rigid! either as to the *ecurity or Interest.: I endeavoured to express all the 4ratitude in my power to this "rofusion of 4oodness! tho+ perhaps it was my Enemy! and began to afflict my .ind with more Agonies! than all the .iseries I had underwent! than "overty! &istress! and "risons united had been able to ma e me feel- )or! *ir! these Acts and "rofessions of

2indness! which were sufficient to have raised in a good (eart the most violent "assion of )riendship to one of the same! or to Age and @gliness in a different *ex! came to me from a #oman! a young and beautiful #oman! one whose "erfections I had long nown; and for whom I had long conceived a violent "assion! tho+ with a &espair! which made me endeavour rather to curb and conceal! than to nourish or acquaint her with it. In short! they came upon me united with 1eauty! *oftness! and %enderness! such bewitching *miles. <, .r. Adams, in that .oment! I lost myself! and forgetting our different *ituations! nor considering what Return I was ma ing to her 4oodness! by desiring her who had given me so much! to bestow her All! I laid gently hold on her (and! and conveying it to my $ips! I prest it with inconceivable Ardour; then lifting up my swimming Eyes! I saw her )ace and /ec overspread with one 1lush; she offered to withdraw her (and! yet not so as to deliver it from mine! tho+ I held it with the gentlest )orce. #e both stood trembling! her Eyes cast on the ground! and mine stedfastly fixed on her. 4ood 4<! what was then the 'ondition of my *oulB burning with $ove! &esire! Admiration! 4ratitude! and every tender "assion! all bent on one charming ,b7ect. "assion at last got the better of both Reason and Respect! and softly letting go her (and! I offered madly to clasp her in my Arms; when a little recovering herself! she started from me! as ing me with some *hew of Anger! :If she had any Reason to expect this %reatment from me.: I then fell prostrate before her! and told her! :If I had offended! my $ife was absolutely in her power! which I would in any manner lose for her sa e. /ay! .adam! said I! you shall not be so ready to punish me! as I to suffer. I own my 4uilt. I detest the Reflection that I would have sacrificed your (appiness to mine. 1elieve me! I sincerely repent my Ingratitude! yet believe me too! it was my "assion! my unbounded "assion for you! which hurried me so far; I have loved you long and tenderly; and the 4oodness you have shewn me! hath innocently weighed down a #retch undone before. Acquit me of all mean mercenary Views! and before I ta e my $eave of you for ever! which I am resolved instantly to do! believe me! that )ortune could have raised me to no height to which I could not have gladly listed you. , curst be )ortune.: < :&o not!: says she! interrupting me with the sweetest Voice! :&o not curse )ortune! since she hath made me happy! and if she hath put your (appiness in my power! I have told you! you shall as nothing in Reason which I will refuse.: :.adam!: said I! you mista e me if you imagine! as you seem! my (appiness is in the power of )ortune now. Aou have obliged me too much already; if I have any #ish! it is for some blest Accident! by which I may contribute with my $ife to the least Augmentation of your )elicity. As for my self! the only (appiness I can ever have! will be hearing of your+s; and if )ortune will ma e that complete! I will forgive her all her #rongs to me.: :Aou may! indeed!: answered she! smiling! :)or your own must be included in it. I have long nown your #orth; nay! I must confess!: said she! blushing! :I have long discovered that "assion for me you profess! notwithstanding those Endeavours which I am convinced were unaffected! to conceal it; and if all I can give with Reason will not suffice!<ta e Reason away!<and now I believe you cannot as me what I will deny.: < *he uttered these #ords with a *weetness not to be imagined. I immediately started! my 1lood which lay free5ing at my (eart! rushed tumultuously through every Vein. I stood for a .oment silent! then flying to her! I caught her in my Arms! no longer resisting!<and softly told her! she must give me then herself. < , *ir!<'an I describe her $oo = *he remained silent and almost motionless several .inutes. At last! recovering herself a little! she insisted on my leaving her! and in such a manner that I instantly obeyed- Aou may imagine! however! I soon saw her again. <1ut I as pardon! I fear I have detained you too long in relating the "articulars of the former Interview. :*o far otherwise!: said Adams, lic ing his $ips! :that I could willingly hear it over again.: #ell! *ir! continued the 4entleman! to be as concise as possible! within a #ee she consented to ma e me the happiest of .an ind. #e were married shortly after; and when I came to examine the 'ircumstances of my #ife+s )ortune; 8which I do assure you I was not presently at $eisure enough to do9 I found it amounted to about six thousand "ounds! most part of which lay in Effects; for her )ather had been a #ine0.erchant! and she seemed willing! if I li ed it! that I should carry on the same %rade. I readily and too inconsiderately undertoo it- )or not having been bred up to the *ecrets of the 1usiness! and endeavouring to deal with the utmost (onesty and @prightness! I soon found out )ortune in a declining #ay! and my %rade decreasing by little and little- )or my #ines which I never adulterated after their Importation! and were sold as neat as they came over! were universally decried by the Vintners! to whom I could not allow them quite as cheap as those who gained double the "rofit by a less "rice. I soon began so despair of improving our )ortune by these means; nor was I at all easy at the Visits and )amiliarity

of many who had been my Acquaintance in my "rosperity! but denied! and shunned me in my Adversity! and now very forwardly renewed their Acquaintance with me. In short! I had sufficiently seen! that the "leasures of the #orld are chiefly )olly! and the 1usiness of it mostly 2navery; and both! nothing better than Vanity%he .en of "leasure tearing one another to pieces! from the Emulation of spending .oney! and the .en of 1usiness from Envy in getting it. .y (appiness consisted entirely in my #ife! whom I loved with an inexpressible )ondness! which was perfectly returned; and my "rospects were no other than to provide for our growing )amily; for she was now big of her second 'hild; I therefore too an ,pportunity to as her ,pinion of entering into a retired $ife! which after hearing my Reasons! and perceiving my Affection for it! she readily embraced. #e soon put our small )ortune! now reduced under three thousand "ounds! into .oney! with part of which we purchased this little "lace! whither we retired soon after her &elivery! from a #orld full of 1ustle! /oise! (atred! Envy! and Ingratitude! to Ease! >uiet! and $ove. #e have here liv+d almost twenty Aears! with little other 'onversation than our own! most of the /eighbourhood ta ing us for very strange "eople; the *quire of the "arish representing me as a .adman! and the "arson as a "resbyterian; because I will not hunt with the one! nor drin with the other. :*ir!: says Adams, :)ortune hath I thin paid you all her &ebts in this sweet Retirement.: *ir! replied the 4entleman! I am than ful to the great Author of all %hings for the 1lessings I here en7oy. I have the best of #ives! and three pretty 'hildren! for whom I have the true %enderness of a "arent; but no 1lessings are pure in this #orld. #ithin three Aears of my Arrival here I lost my eldest *on. H1ere he sighed bitterly.I :*ir!: says Adams, :we must submit to "rovidence! and consider &eath is common to all.: #e must submit! indeed! answered the 4entleman; and if he had died! I could have borne the $oss with "atience- 1ut alasB *ir! he was stolen away from my &oor by some wic ed travelling "eople whom they call #ipsies ; nor could I ever with the most diligent *earch recover him. "oor !ac"yB he had the sweetest $oo ! the exact "icture of his .other; at which some %ears unwittingly dropt from his Eyes! as did li ewise from those of Adams, who always sympathi5ed with his )riends on those ,ccasions. %hus! *ir! said the 4entleman! I have finished my *tory! in which if I have been too particular! I as your "ardon; and now! if you please! I will fetch you another 1ottle; which "roposal the "arson than fully accepted. '(A". IV. A )escription of $r. Wilson*s Way of Living. (he tragical Adventure of the )og, and other grave $atters. %he 4entleman returned with the 1ottle! and Adams and he sat some time silent! when the former started up and cried! : o, that won*t do.: %he 4entleman enquired into his .eaning; he answered! :(e had been considering that it was possible the late famous 2ing (heodore might have been that very *on whom he lost;: but added! :that his Age could not answer that Imagination.: :(owever!: says he! :4< disposes all things for the best! and very probably he may be some 4reat .an! or &u e! and may one day or other revisit you in that 'apacity.: %he 4entleman answered! he should now him amongst ten thousand! for he had a .ar on his left 1reast! of a *trawberry! which his .other had given him by longing for that )ruit. %hat beautiful young $ady! the $orning, now rose from her 1ed! and with a 'ountenance blooming with fresh Aouth and *prightliness! li e .iss <! with soft &ews hanging on her pouting $ips! began to ta e her early #al over the eastern (ills; and presently after! that gallant "erson the *un stole softly from his #ife+s 'hamber to pay his Addresses to her; when the 4entleman as +d his 4uest if he would wal forth and survey his little 4arden! which he readily agreed to! and !oseph at the same time awa ing from a *leep in which he had been two (ours buried! went with them. /o "arterres! no )ountains! no *tatues embellished this little 4arden. Its only ,rnament was a short #al ! shaded on each side by a )ilbert (edge! with a small Alcove at one end! whither in hot #eather the 4entleman and his #ife used to retire and divert themselves with their 'hildren! who played in the #al before them- 1ut tho+ Vanity had no Votary in this little *pot! here was variety of )ruit! and every thing useful for the 2itchin! which was abundantly sufficient to catch the Admiration of Adams, who told the 4entleman he had certainly a good 4ardener. *ir! answered he! that 4ardener is now before you; whatever you see here! is the #or solely of my own (ands. #hilst I am providing /ecessaries for my %able! I li ewise procure myself an Appetite for them. In fair *easons I seldom pass less than six (ours of the twenty four in this "lace! where I am not idle! and by these means I have been

able to preserve my (ealth ever since my Arrival here without Assistance from "hysic . (ither I generally repair at the &awn! where I exercise myself whilst my #ife dresses her 'hildren! and prepares our 1rea fast! after which we are seldom asunder during the residue of the &ay; for when the #eather will not permit them to accompany me here! I am usually within with them; for I am neither ashamed of conversing with my #ife! nor of playing with my 'hildren- to say the %ruth! I do not perceive that Inferiority of @nderstanding which the $evity of Ra es! the &ulness of .en of 1usiness! or the Austerity of the $earned would persuade us of in #omen. As for my #oman! I declare I have found none of my own *ex capable of ma ing 7uster ,bservations on $ife! or of delivering them more agreeably; nor do I believe any one possessed of a faithfuller or braver )riend. And sure as this )riendship is sweetened with more &elicacy and %enderness! so is it confirmed by dearer "ledges than can attend the closest male Alliance- )or what @nion can be so fast! as our common Interest in the )ruits of our Embraces= "erhaps! *ir! you are not yourself a )ather; if you are not! be assured you cannot conceive the &elight I have in my $ittle0,nes. #ould you not despise me! if you saw me stretched on the 4round! and my 'hildren playing round me= :I should reverence the *ight! quoth Adams, and I myself am now the )ather of six! and have been of eleven! and I can say I never scourged a 'hild of my own! unless as his *chool0master! and then have felt every *tro e on my own "osteriors. And as to what you say concerning #omen! I have often lamented my own #ife did not understand #ree".: <%he 4entleman smiled! and answered! he would not be apprehended to insinuate that his own had an @nderstanding above the 'are of her )amily! on the contrary! says he! my 1arriet I assure you is a notable (ousewife! and few 4entlemen+s (ouse0 eepers understand 'oo ery or 'onfectionary better; but these are Arts which she hath no great ,ccasion for now- however! the #ine you commended so much last /ight at *upper! was of her own ma ing! as is indeed all the $iquor in my (ouse! except my 1eer! which falls to my "rovince. #e formerly ept a .aid0*ervant! but since my 4irls have been growing up! she is unwilling to indulge them in Idleness; for as the )ortunes I shall give them will be very small! we intend not to breed them above the Ran they are li ely to fill hereafter! nor to teach them to despise or ruin a plain (usband. Indeed I could wish a .an of my own %emper! and a retired $ife! might fall to their $ot- for I have experienced that calm serene (appiness which is seated in 'ontent! is inconsistent with the (urry and 1ustle of the #orld. (e was proceeding thus! when the $ittle %hings! being 7ust risen! ran eagerly towards him! and as ed him 1lessing- %hey were shy to the *trangers! but the eldest acquainted her )ather that her .other and the young 4entlewoman were up! and that 1rea fast was ready. %hey all went in! where the 4entleman was surpri5ed at the 1eauty of -anny, who had now recovered herself from her )atigue! and was entirely clean drest; for the Rogues who had ta en away her "urse! had left her her 1undle. 1ut if he was so much ama5ed at the 1eauty of this young 'reature! his 4uests were no less charmed at the %enderness which appeared in the 1ehaviour of (usband and #ife to each other! and to their 'hildren! and the dutiful and affectionate 1ehaviour of these to their "arents. %hese Instances pleased the well0disposed .ind of Adams equally with the Readiness which they exprest to oblige their 4uests! and their )orwardness to offer them the best of every thing in their (ouse; and what delighted him still more! was an Instance or two of their 'harity- for whilst they were at 1rea fast! the good #oman was called forth to assist her sic /eighbour! which she did with some 'ordials made for the public @se; and the good .an went into his 4arden at the same time! to supply another with something which he wanted thence for they had nothing which those who wanted it were not welcome to. %hese good "eople were in the utmost 'heerfulness! when they heard the Report of a 4un! and immediately afterwards a little &og! the )avourite of the eldest &aughter! came limping in all bloody! and laid himself at his .istress+s )eet- %he poor 4irl! who was about eleven Aears old! burst into %ears at the sight! and presently one of the /eighbours came in and informed them! that the young *quire! the *on of the $ord of the .anor! had shot him as he past by! swearing at the same time he would prosecute the .aster of him for eeping a *paniel; for that he had given /otice he would not suffer one in the "arish. %he &og! whom his .istress had ta en into her $ap! died in a few .inutes! lic ing her (and. *he exprest great Agony at his $oss! and the other 'hildren began to cry for their *ister+s .isfortune! nor could -anny herself refrain. #hilst the )ather and .other attempted to comfort her! Adams grasped his 'rab *tic ! and would have sallied out after the *quire! had not !oseph withheld him. (e could not however bridle his %ongue<(e pronounced the #ord 7ascal with great Emphasis! said he deserved to be hanged more than a (ighwayman! and wish+d he had the scourging him. %he .other too her 'hild! lamenting and carrying the dead )avourite

in her Arms out of the Room! when the 4entleman said! this was the second time this *quire had endeavoured to ill the little #retch! and had wounded him smartly once before! adding! he could have no .otive but Ill0nature; for the little thing! which was not near as big as one+s )ist! had never been twenty Aards from the (ouse in the six Aears his &aughter had had it. (e said he had done nothing to deserve this @sage- but his )ather had too great a )ortune to contend with. %hat he was as absolute as any %yrant in the @niverse! and had illed all the &ogs! and ta en away all the 4uns in the /eighbourhood! and not only that! but he trampled down (edges! and rode over 'orn and 4ardens! with no more Regard than if they were the (ighway. :I wish I could catch him in my 4arden! said Adams; tho+ I would rather forgive him riding through my (ouse than such an ill0natur+d Act as this.: %he 'heerfulness of their 'onversation being interrupted by this Accident! in which the 4uests could be of no service to their ind Entertainer! and as the .other was ta en up in administring 'onsolation to the poor 4irl! whose &isposition was too good hastily to forget the sudden $oss of her little )avourite! which had been fondling with her a few .inutes before; and as !oseph and -anny were impatient to get home and begin those previous 'eremonies to their (appiness which Adams had insisted on! they now offered to ta e their $eave. %he 4entleman importuned them much to stay &inner- but when he found their Eagerness to depart! he summoned his #ife! and accordingly having performed all the usual 'eremonies of 1ows and 'urtsies! more pleasant to be seen than to be related! they too their $eave! the 4entleman and his #ife heartily wishing them a good ?ourney! and they as heartily than ing them for their ind Entertainment. %hey then departed! Adams declaring that this was the .anner in which the "eople had lived in the 4olden Age. '(A". IV. A )isputation on 'chools, held on the 7oad between $r. Abraham Adams and !oseph; and a )iscovery not unwelcome to them both. ,ur %ravellers having well refreshed themselves at the 4entleman+s (ouse! !oseph and -anny with *leep! and .r. Abraham Adams with Ale and %obacco! renewed their ?ourney with great Alacrity; and! pursuing the Road in which they were directed! travelled many .iles before they met with any Adventure worth relating. In this Interval! we shall present our Readers with a very curious &iscourse! as we apprehend it! concerning public *chools! which pass+d between .r. !oseph Andrews and .r. Abraham Adams. %hey had not gone far! before Adams calling to !oseph, as ed him if he had attended to the 4entleman+s *tory; he answered! to all the former "arts. :And don+t you thin !: says he! :he was a very unhappy .an in his Aouth=: :A very unhappy .an indeed!: answered the other. : !oseph,: cries Adams, screwing up his .outh! :I have found it; I have discovered the 'ause of all the .isfortunes which befel him. A public *chool! !oseph, was the 'ause of all the 'alamities which he after suffered. "ublic *chools are the /urseries of all Vice and Immorality. All the wic ed )ellows whom I remember at the @niversity were bred at them. < Ah $ordB I can remember as well as if it was but yesterday! a 2not of them; they called them 2ing+s *cholars! I forget why<very wic ed )ellowsB !oseph, you may than the $ord you were not bred at a public *chool! you would never have preserved your Virtue as you have. %he first 'are I always ta e! is of a 1oy+s .orals! I had rather he should be a 1loc head than an Atheist or a "resbyterian. #hat is all the $earning of the #orld compared to his immortal *oul= #hat shall a .an ta e in exchange for his *oul= 1ut the .asters of great *chools trouble themselves about no such thing. I have nown a $ad of eighteen at the @niversity! who hath not been able to say his 'atechism; but for my own part! I always scourged a $ad sooner for missing that than any other $esson. 1elieve me! 'hild! all that 4entleman+s .isfortunes arose from his being educated at a public *chool.: :It doth not become me!: answer+d !oseph, :to dispute any thing! *ir! with you! especially a matter of this ind; for to be sure you must be allowed by all the #orld to be the best %eacher of a *chool in all our 'ounty.: :Aes! that!: says Adams, :I believe! is granted me; that I may without much Vanity pretend to<nay I believe I may go to the next 'ounty too<but gloriari non est meum <:(owever! *ir! as you are pleased to bid me spea !: says !oseph, :you now! my late .aster! *ir (homas %ooby, was bred at a public *chool! and he was the finest 4entleman in all the /eigbourhood. And I have often heard him say! if he had a hundred 1oys he would breed them all at the same "lace. It was his ,pinion! and I have often heard him deliver it!

that a 1oy ta en from a public *chool! and carried into the #orld! will learn more in one Aear there! than one of a private Education will in five. (e used to say! the *chool itself initiated him a great way! 8I remember that was his very Expression9 for great *chools are little *ocieties! where a 1oy of any ,bservation may see in Epitome what he will after find in the #orld at large.: : 1inc ill9 lachrym9; for that very Reason!: quoth Adams, :I prefer a private *chool! where 1oys may be ept in Innocence and Ignorancefor! according to that fine "assage in the "lay of Cato, the only &nglish %ragedy I ever read! 6.f 0nowledge of the World must ma"e $en <illains, 6$ay !uba ever live in .gnorance. :#ho would not rather preserve the "urity of his 'hild! than wish him to attain the whole 'ircle of Arts and *ciences; which! by the bye! he may learn in the 'lasses of private *chool- for I would not be vain! but I esteem myself to be second to none! nulli secundum, in teaching these things; so that a $ad may have as much $earning in a private as in a public Education.: :And with *ubmission!: answered !oseph, :he may get as much Vice! witness several 'ountry 4entlemen! who were educated within five .iles of their own (ouses! and are as wic ed as if they had nown the #orld from their Infancy. I remember when I was in the *table! if a young (orse was vicious in his /ature! no 'orrection would ma e him otherwise; I ta e it to be equally the same among .en- if a 1oy be of a mischievous wic ed Inclination! no *chool! tho+ ever so private! will ever ma e him good; on the contrary! if he be of a righteous %emper! you may trust him to London, or wherever else you please! he will be in no danger of being corrupted. 1esides! I have often heard my .aster say! that the &iscipline practised in public *chools was much better than that in private:<:Aou tal li e a ?ac anapes!: says Adams, :and so did your .aster. &iscipline indeedB because one .an scourges twenty or thirty 1oys more in a .orning than another! is he therefore a better &isciplinarian= I do presume to confer in this "oint with all who have taught from Chiron*s time to this &ay; and! if I was .aster of six 1oys ouly! I would preserve as good &iscipline amongst them as the .aster of the greatest *chool in the #orld. I say nothing! young .an; remember! I say nothing; but if *ir (homas himself had been educated nearer home! and under the %uition of somebody! remember! I name nobody! it might have been better for him<but his )ather must institute him in the 2nowledge of the #orld. emo mortalium omnibus horis sapit.6 !oseph seeing him run on in this manner as ed pardon many times! assuring him he had no Intention to offend. :I believe you had not! 'hild!: said he! :and I am not angry with you- but for maintaining good &iscipline in a *chool; for this!: <And then he ran on as before! named all the .asters who are recorded in old 1oo s! and preferred himself to them all. Indeed if this good .an had an Enthusiasm! or what the Vulgar call a 1lind0 side! it was this- (e thought a *choolmaster the greatest 'haracter in the #orld! and himself the greatest of all *choolmasters! neither of which "oints he would have given up to Ale8ander the #reat at the (ead of his Army. Adams continued his *ub7ect till they came to one of the beautifullest *pots of 4round in the @niverse. It was a ind of natural Amphitheatre! formed by the winding of a small Rivulet! which was planted with thic #oods! whose %rees rose gradually above each other by the natural Ascent of the 4round they stood on; which Ascent! as they hid with their 1oughs! they seemed to have been disposed by the most s illful &esign of the "lanter. %he *oil was spread with a Verdure which no "aint could imitate! and the whole "lace might have raised romantic Ideas in elder .inds than those of !oseph and -anny, without the Assistance of $ove. (ere they arrived about /oon! and !oseph proposed to Adams that they should rest a while in this delightful "lace! and refresh themselves with some "rovisions which the 4ood0nature of .rs. Wilson had provided them with. Adams made no ,b7ection to the "roposal! so down they sat! and pulling out a cold )owl! and a 1ottle of #ine! they made a Repast with a 'heerfulness which might have attracted the Envy of more splendid %ables. I should not omit! that they found among their "rovision a little "aper! containing a piece of 4old! which Adams imagining it had been put there by mista e! would have returned bac ! to deliver them; but he was at last convinced by !oseph, that .r. Wilson had ta en this handsome way of furnishing them with a *upply for their ?ourney! on his having related the &istress which they had been in! when they were relieved by the 4enerosity of the "edlar. Adams said! he was glad to see such an Instance of 4oodness! not so much for the 'onveniency which it brought to them! but for the sa e of the &oer! whose Reward would be great in (eaven. (e li ewise comforted himself with a Reflection! that he should shortly have an ,pportunity of returning it him; for the 4entleman was within a #ee to ma e a ?ourney into 'omersetshire,

to pass through Adam*s "arish! and had faithfully promised to call on him- A 'ircumstance which we thought too immaterial to mention before; but which those who have as great an Affection for that 4entleman as ourselves will re7oice at! as it may give them (opes of seeing him again. %hen !oseph made a *peech on 'harity! which the Reader! if he is so disposed! may see in the next 'hapter; for we scorn to betray him into any such Reading! without first giving him #arning. '(A". V. $oral 7eflections by !oseph Andrews, with the 1unting Adventure, and Parson Adams*s miraculous &scape. I have often wondered! *ir! said he! to observe so few Instances of 'harity among .an ind; for tho+ the 4oodness of a .an+s (eart did not incline him to relieve the &istresses of his )ellow0'reatures! methin s the &esire of (onour should move him to it. #hat inspires a .an to build fine (ouses! to purchase fine )urniture! "ictures! 'lothes! and other things at a great Expence! but an Ambition to be respected more than other "eople= /ow would not one great Act of 'harity! one Instance of redeeming a poor )amily from all the .iseries of "overty! restoring an unfortunate %radesman by a *um of .oney to the means of procuring a $ivelihood by his Industry! discharging an undone &ebtor from his &ebts or a 4oal! or any such li e Example of 4oodness! create a .an more (onour and Respect than he could acquire by the finest (ouse! )urniture! "ictures or 'lothes that were ever beheld= )or not only the ,b7ect himself! who was thus relieved! but all who heard the /ame of such a "erson must! I imagine! reverence him infinitely more than the "ossessor of all those other things- which when we so admire! we rather praise the 1uilder! the #or man! the "ainter! the $aceman! the %aylor! and the rest! by whose Ingenuity they are produced! than the "erson who by his .oney ma es them his own. )or my own part! when I have waited behind my $ady in a Room hung with fine "ictures! while I have been loo ing at them I have never once thought of their ,wner! nor hath any one else! as I ever observed; for when it hath been as ed whose "icture that was! it was never once answered! the .aster+s of the (ouse! but Ammyconni, Paul <arnish, 1annibal 'carachi, or 1ogarthi, which I suppose were the /ames of the "ainters- but if it was as ed! who redeemed such a one out of "rison= who lent such a ruined %radesman .oney to set up= who cloathed that )amily of poor little 'hildren= it is very plain! what must be the Answer. And besides! these great )ol s are mista en! if they imagine they get any (onour at all by these means; for I do not remember I have ever been with my $ady at any (ouse where she commended the (ouse or )urniture! but I have heard her at her return home ma e sport and 7eer at whatever she had before commended- and I have been told by other 4entlemen in $ivery! that it is the same in their )amiliesbut I defy the wisest .an in the #orld to turn a true good Action into Ridicule. I defy him to do it. (e who should endeavour it! would be laughed at himself! instead of ma ing others laugh. /obody scarce doth any 4ood! yet they all agree in praising those who do. Indeed it is strange that all .en should consent in commending 4oodness! and no .an endeavour to deserve that 'ommendation; whilst! on the contrary! all rail at #ic edness! and all are as eager to be what they abuse. %his I now not the Reason of! but it is as plain as &aylight to those who converse in the #orld! as I have done these three Aears. :Are all the great )ol s wic ed then=: says -anny. %o be sure there are some Exceptions! answered !oseph. *ome 4entlemen of our 'loth report charitable Actions done by their $ords and .asters! and I have heard +*quire Pope, the great "oet! at my $ady+s %able! tell *tories of a .an that lived at a "lace called 7oss, and another at the %ath, one Al;Al <I forget his /ame! but it is in the 1oo of Verses. %his 4entleman hath built up a stately (ouse too! which the +*quire li es very well; but his 'harity is seen farther than his (ouse! tho+ it stands on a (ill! ay! and brings him more (onour. It was his 'harity that put him upon the 1oo ! where the +*quire says he puts all those who deserve it; and to be sure! as he lives among all the great "eople! if there were any such! he would now them. <%his was all of .r. !oseph Andrews*s *peech which I could get him to recollect! which I have delivered as near as was possible in his own #ords! with a very small Embellishment. 1ut I believe the Reader hath not been a little surpri5ed at the long *ilence of "arson Adams, especially as so many ,ccasions offer+d themselves to exert his 'uriosity and ,bservation. %he truth is! he was fast asleep! and had so been from the beginning of the preceding /arrative- and indeed if the Reader considers that two /ights had past since he had closed his Eyes ! he will not wonder at his Repose! tho+ even 1enley himself! or as great an ,rator 8if any such be9 had been in his 7ostrum or %ub before him.

!O'&P1, who! whilst he was spea ing! had continued in one Attitude! with his (ead reclining on one side! and his Eyes cast on the 4round! no sooner perceived! on loo ing up! the "osition of Adams, who was stretched on his 1ac ! and snored louder than the usual braying of the Animal with long Ears; than he turned towards -anny, and ta ing her by the (and! began &alliance! which! tho+ consistent with the purest Innocence and &ecency! neither he would have attempted! nor she permited before any #itness. #hilst they amused themselves in this harmless and delightful manner! they heard a "ac of (ounds approaching in full 'ry towards them! and presently afterwards saw a (are pop forth from the #ood! and crossing the #ater! land within a few Aards of them in the .eadows. %he (are was no sooner on *hore! than it seated itself on its hinder $egs! and listened to the *ound of the "ursuers. -anny was wonderfully pleased with the little #retch! and eagerly longed to have it in her Arms! that she might preserve it from the &angers which seemed to threaten it- but the sensible and human part of the 'reation do not always aptly distinguish their )riends from their )oes; what wonder then if this silly 'reature! the moment it beheld! fled from her who would have protected it! and traversing the .eadows again! past the little Rivulet on the opposite side. It was however so spent and wea ! that it fell down twice or thrice in its way. %his affected the tender (eart of -anny, who exclaimed with %ears in her Eyes against the 1arbarity of worrying a poor innocent defenceless Animal out of its $ife! and putting it to the extremest %orture for &iversion. *he had not much time to ma e Reflections of this ind! for on a sudden the (ounds rushed through the #ood! which resounded with their %hroats! and the %hroats of their Attendants who waited on them on horsebac . %he &ogs now past the Rivulet! and pursued the )ootsteps of the (are; five (orsemen attempted to leap over! three of whom succeeded! and two were in the Attempt thrown from their *addles into the #ater; their 'ompanions and their own (orses too proceeded after their *port! and left their )riends and Riders to invo e the Assistance of )ortune! or employ the more active means of *trength and Agility for their &eliverance. !oseph however was not so unconcerned on this ,ccasion; he left -anny for a moment to herself! and ran to the 4entlemen! who were immediately on their $egs! sha ing their Ears! and easily with the help of his (and attained the 1an ; 8for the Rivulet was not at all deep9 and without staying to than their ind Assister! ran dripping across the .eadow! calling to their 1rother *portsmen to stop their (orses- but they heard them not. %he (ounds were now very little behind their poor reeling! staggering "rey! which fainting almost at every *tep! crawled through the #ood! and had almost got round to the "lace where -anny stood! when it was overta en by its Enemies; and being driven out of the 'overt was caught! and instantly tore to pieces before -anny*s )ace! who was unable to assist it with any Aid more powerful than "ity; nor could she prevail on !oseph, who had been himself a *portsman in his Aouth! to attempt any thing contrary to the $aws of (unting! in favour of the (are! which he said was illed fairly. %he (are was caught within a Aard or two of Adams, who lay asleep at some distance from the $overs! and the (ounds in devouring it! and pulling it bac wards and forwards! had drawn it so close to him! that some of them 8by .ista e perhaps for the (are+s * in9 laid hold of the * irts of his 'assoc ! others at the same time applying their %eeth to his #ig! which he had with a (and erchief fastened to his (ead! they began to pull him about; and had not the .otion of his 1ody had more effect on him than seemed to be wrought by the /oise! they must certainly have tasted his )lesh! which delicious )lavour might have been fatal to him- 1ut being roused by these %uggings! he instantly awa ed! and with a ?er delivering his (ead from his #ig! he with most admirable &exterity recovered his $egs! which now seemed the only .embers he could entrust his *afety to. (aving therefore escaped li ewise from at least a third "art of his 'assoc ! which he willingly left as his &8uvi9 or *poils to the Enemy! he fled with the utmost speed he could summon to his Assistance. /or let this be any &etraction from the 1ravery of his 'haracter; let the /umber of the Enemies! and the *urpri5e in which he was ta en! be considered; and if there be any .odern so outragiously brave! that he cannot admit of )light in any 'ircumstance whatever! I say 8but I whisper that softly! and I solemnly declare! without any Intention of giving ,ffence to any brave .an in the /ation9 I say! or rather I whisper that he is an ignorant )ellow! and hath never read 1omer nor <irgil, nor nows he any thing of 1ector or (urnus; nay! he is unacquainted with the (istory of some great .en living! who! tho+ as brave as $ions! ay! as %igers! have run away the $ord nows how far! and the $ord nows why! to the *urpri5e of their )riends! and the Entertainment of their Enemies. 1ut if "ersons of such heroic &isposition are a little offended at the 1ehaviour of Adams, we assure them they shall be as much pleased with what we shall immediately relate of

!oseph Andrews. %he .aster of the "ac was 7ust arrived! or! as the *portsmen call it! Come in, when Adams set out! as we have before mentioned. %his 4entleman was generally said to be a great $over of (umour; but not to mince the matter! especially as we are upon this *ub7ect! he was a great 1unter of $en- indeed he had hitherto followed the *port only with &ogs of his own *pecies; for he ept two or three 'ouple of bar ing 'urs for that @se only. (owever! as he thought he had now found a .an nimble enough! he was willing to indulge himself with other *port! and accordingly crying out! 'tole away, encouraged the (ounds to pursue .r. Adams, swearing it was the largest ?ac (are he ever saw; at the same time hallooing and hooping as if a conquered )oe was flying before him; in which he was imitated by these two or three 'ouple of (uman! or rather two0leg+d 'urs on horsebac which we have mentioned before. /ow thou! whoever thou art! whether a .use! or by what other /ame soever thou chusest to be called! who presidest over 1iography! and hast inspired all the #riters of $ives in these our %imes- %hou who didst infuse such wonderful (umour into the "en of immortal #ulliver, who hast carefully guided the ?udgment! whilst thou hast exalted the nervous manly *tyle of thy $allet- %hou who hadst no (and in that &edication! and "reface! or the %ranslations which thou wouldst willingly have struc out of the $ife of Cicero - $astly! %hou who without the Assistance of the least *pice of $iterature! and even against his Inclination! hast! in some "ages of his 1oo ! forced Colley Cibber to write &nglish; do thou assist me in what I find my self unequal to. &o thou introduce on the "lain! the young! the gay! the brave !oseph Andrews, whilst .en shall view him with Admiration and Envy; tender Virgins with $ove and anxious 'oncern for his *afety. /o sooner did !oseph Andrews perceive the &istress of his )riend! when first the quic 0scenting &ogs attac ed him! than he grasped his 'udgel in his right (and! a 'udgel which his )ather had of his 4randfather! to whom a mighty strong .an of 0ent had given it for a "resent in that &ay! when he bro e three (eads on the *tage. It was a 'udgel of mighty *trength and wonderful Art! made by one of .r. )eard*s best #or men! whom no other Artificer can equal; and who hath made all those *tic s which the 1eaus have lately wal ed with about the "ar in a .orning- 1ut this was far his .aster0piece; on its (ead was engraved a /ose and 'hin! which might have been mista en for a "air of /ut0crac ers. %he $earned have imagined it designed to represent the #orgon- but it was in fact copied from the )ace of a certain &nglish 1aronet of infinite #it! (umour! and 4ravity. (e did intend to have engraved here many (istoriesAs the first /ight of 'aptain %;*s "lay! where you would have seen 'ritic s in Embroidery transplanted from the 1oxes to the "it! whose ancient Inhabitants were exalted to the 4alleries! where they played on 'atcalls. (e did intend to have painted an Auction0Room! where .r. Coc" would have appeared aloft in his "ulpit! trumpeting forth the "raises of a China 1ason; and with Astonishment wondering that obody bids more for that fine, that superb. <(e did intend to have engraved many other things! but was forced to leave all out for want of room. /o sooner had !oseph grasped this 'udgel in his (ands! than $ightning darted from his Eyes; and the heroic Aouth! swift of )oot! ran with the utmost speed to his )riend+s assistance. (e overtoo him 7ust as 7oc"wood had laid hold of the * irt of his 'assoc ! which being torn hung to the ground. Reader! we would ma e a *imile on this ,ccasion! but for two Reasons- %he first is! it would interrupt the &escription! which should be rapid in this "art; but that doth not weigh much! many "recedents occurring for such an Interruption- %he second! and much the greater Reason is! that we could find no *imile adequate to our "urpose- )or indeed! what Instance could we bring to set before our Reader+s Eyes at once the Idea of )riendship! 'ourage! Aouth! 1eauty! *trength! and *wiftness; all which bla5ed in the "erson of !oseph Andrews. $et those therefore that describe $ions and %igers! and (eroes fiercer than both! raise their "oems or "lays with the *imile of !oseph Andrews, who is himself above the reach of any *imile. /ow 7oc"wood had laid fast hold on the "arson+s * irts! and stopt his )light; which !oseph no sooner perceived! than he levelled his 'udgel at his (ead! and laid him sprawling. !owler and 7ingwood then fell on his 4reat0'oat! and had undoubtedly brought him to the 4round! had not !oseph, collecting all his )orce given !owler such a Rap on the 1ac ! that quitting his (old he ran howling over the "lain- A harder )ate remained for thee! , 7ingwood. 7ingwood the best (ound that ever pursued a (are! who never threw his %ongue but where the *cent was undoubtedly true; good at trailing; and sure in a 1ighway, no %abler, no Over,runner, respected by the whole "ac ! who! whenever he opened! new the 4ame was at hand. (e fell by the *tro e of !oseph. (hunder, and Plunder, and Wonder, and %lunder, were the next Victims of his

#rath! and measured their $engths on the 4round. %hen -airmaid, a 1itch which .r. !ohn (emple had bred up in his (ouse! and fed at his own %able! and lately sent the *quire fifty .iles for a "resent! ran fiercely at !oseph, and bit him by the $eg; no &og was ever fiercer than she! being descended from an Ama2onian 1reed! and had worried 1ulls in her own 'ountry! but now waged an unequal )ight; and had shared the )ate of these we have mentioned before! had not )iana 8the Reader may believe it or not! as he pleases9 in that Instant interposed! and in the *hape of the (untsman snatched her )avourite up in her Arms. %he "arson now faced about! and with his 'rab *tic felled many to the Earth! and scattered others! till he was attac ed by C9sar and pulled to the 4round; then !oseph flew to his Rescue! and with such .ight fell on the Victor! that! , eternal 1lot to his /ameB C9sar ran yelping away. %he 1attle now raged with the most dreadful Violence! when lo the (untsman! a .an of Aears and &ignity! lifted his Voice! and called his (ounds from the )ight; telling them! in a $anguage they understood! that it was in vain to contend longer; for that )ate had decreed the Victory to their Enemies. %hus far the .use hath with her usual &ignity related this prodigious 1attle! a 1attle we apprehend never equalled by any "oet! Romance or $ife0writer whatever! and having brought it to a 'onclusion she ceased; we shall therefore proceed in our ordinary *tyle with the 'ontinuation of this (istory. %he *quire and his 'ompanions! whom the )igure of Adams and the 4allantry of !oseph had at first thrown into a violent )it of $aughter! and who had hitherto beheld the Engagement with more &elight than any 'hace! *hooting0match! Race! 'oc 0fighting! 1ull or 1ear01aiting had ever given them! began now to apprehend the &anger of their (ounds! many of which lay sprawling in the )ields. %he *quire therefore having first called his )riends about him! as 4uards for *afety of his "erson! rode manfully up to the 'ombatants! and summoning all the %error he was .aster of! into his 'ountenance! demanded with an authoritative Voice of !oseph, what he meant by assaulting his &ogs in that .anner. !oseph answered with great Intrepidity! that they had first fallen on his )riend; and if they had belonged to the greatest .an in the 2ingdom! he would have treated them in the same #ay; for whilst his Veins contained a single &rop of 1lood! he would not stand idle by! and see that 4entleman 8pointing to Adams9 abused either by .an or 1east; and having so said! both he and Adams brandished their wooden #eapons! and put themselves into such a "osture! that the *quire and his 'ompany thought proper to preponderate! before they offered to revenge the 'ause of their four0footed Allies. At this Instant -anny, whom the Apprehension of !oseph*s &anger had alarmed so much! that forgetting her own she had made the utmost Expedition! came up. %he *quire and all the (orsemen were so surpri5ed with her 1eauty! that they immediately fixed both their Eyes and %houghts solely on her. Every one declared he had never seen so charming a 'reature. /either .irth nor Anger engaged them a .oment longer; but all sat in silent Ama5e. %he (untsman only was free from her Attraction! who was busy in cutting the Ears of the &ogs! and endeavouring to recover them to $ife; in which he succeeded so well! that only two of no great /ote remained slaughtered on the )ield of Action. @pon this the (untsman declared! :+%was well it was no worse; for his part he could not blame the 4entleman! and wondered his .aster would encourage the &ogs to hunt Christians; that it was the surest way to spoil them! to ma e them follow <ermin instead of stic ing to a (are.: %he *quire being informed of the little .ischief that had been done; and perhaps having more .ischief of another ind in his (ead! accosted .r. Adams with a more favourable Aspect than before- he told him he was sorry for what had happened; that he had endeavoured all he could to prevent it! the .oment he was acquainted with his 'loth! and greatly commended the 'ourage of his *ervant; for so he imagined !oseph to be. (e then invited .r. Adams to &inner! and desired the young #oman might come with him. Adams refused a long while; but the Invitation was repeated with so much Earnestness and 'ourtesy! that at length he was forced to accept it. (is #ig and (at! and other *poils of the )ield! being gathered together by !oseph, 8for otherwise probably they would have been forgotten;9 he put himself into the best ,rder he could; and then the (orse and )oot moved forward in the same "ace towards the *quire+s (ouse! which stood at a very little distance. #hilst they were on the Road! the lovely -anny attracted the Eyes of all; they endeavoured to outvie one another in Encomiums on her 1eauty; which the Reader will pardon my not relating! as they had not any thing new or uncommon in them- *o must he li ewise my not setting down the many curious ?ests which were made on Adams, some of them declaring that "arson0hunting was the best *port in the #orld- ,thers

commending his standing at 1ay! which they said he had done as well as any 1adger; with such li e .erriment! which tho+ it would ill become the &ignity of this (istory; afforded much $aughter and &iversion to the *quire! and his facetious 'ompanions. '(A". VI. A 'cene of 7oasting very nicely adapted to the present (aste and (imes. %hey arrived at the *quire+s (ouse 7ust as his &inner was ready. A little &ispute arose on the account of -anny, whom the *quire who was a 1atchelor! was desirous to place at his own %able; but she would not consent! nor would .r. Adams permit her to be parted from !oseph- so that she was at length with him consigned over to the 2itchin! where the *ervants were ordered to ma e him drun ; a )avour which was li ewise intended for Adams- which &esign being executed! the *quire thought he should easily accomplish! what he had! when he first saw her! intended to perpetrate with -anny . It may not be improper! before we proceed farther to open a little the 'haracter of this 4entleman! and that of his )riends. %he .aster of this (ouse then was a .an of a very considerable )ortune; a 1atchelor! as we have said! and about forty Aears of Age- (e had been educated 8if we may use the Expression9 in the 'ountry! and at his own (ome! under the 'are of his .other and a %utor! who had ,rders never to correct him nor to compel him to learn more than he li ed! which it seems was very little! and that only in his 'hildhood; for from the Age of fifteen he addicted himself entirely to (unting and other rural Amusements! for which his .other too care to equip him with (orses! (ounds! and all other /ecessaries- and his %utor endeavouring to ingratiate himself with his young "upil! who would! he new! be able handsomely to provide for him! became his 'ompanion! not only at these Exercises! but li ewise over a 1ottle! which the young *quire had a very early Relish for. At the Age of twenty! his .other began to thin she had not fulfilled the &uty of a "arent; she therefore resolved to persuade her *on! if possible! to that which she imagined would well supply all that he might have learned at a public *chool or @niversity. %his is what they commonly call (ravelling; which! with the help of the %utor who was fixed on to attend him! she easily succeeded in. (e made in N Aears the %our of &urope, as they term it! and returned home! well furnish+d with -rench 'lothes! "hrases and *ervants! with a hearty 'ontempt for his own 'ountry; especially what had any *avour of the plain *pirit and (onesty of our Ancestors. (is .other greatly applauded herself at his Return; and now being .aster of his own )ortune! he soon procured himself a *eat in "arliament! and was in the common ,pinion one of the finest 4entlemen of his Age- 1ut what distinguished him chiefly! was a strange &elight which he too in every thing which is ridiculous! odious! and absurd in his own *pecies; so that he never chose a 'ompanion without one or more of these Ingredients! and those who were mar ed by /ature in the most eminent &egree with them! were most his )avourites- if he ever found a .an who either had not or endeavoured to conceal these Imperfections! he too great pleasure in inventing .ethods of forcing him into Absurdities! which were not natural to him! or in drawing forth and exposing those that were; for which purpose he was always provided with a *et of )ellows whom we have before called 'urs; and who did indeed no great (onour to the 'anine 2ind- %heir 1usiness was to hunt out and display every thing that had any *avour of the above mentioned >ualities! and especially in the gravest and best 'haracters- 1ut if they failed in their *earch! they were to turn even Virtue and #isdom themselves into Ridicule for the &iversion of their .aster and )eeder. %he 4entlemen of 'urli e &isposition! who were now at his (ouse! and whom he had brought with him from London, were an old (alf0pay ,fficer! a "layer! a dull "oet! a >uac &octor! a scraping )idler! and a lame #erman &ancing0.aster. As soon as &inner was served! while .r. Adams was saying 4race! the 'aptain conveyed his 'hair from behind him; so that when he endeavoured to seat himself! he fell down on the 4round; and thus compleated ?o e the first! to the great Entertainment of the whole 'ompany. %he second ?o e was performed by the "oet! who sat next him on the other side! and too an ,pportunity! while poor Adams was respectfully drin ing to the .aster of the (ouse! to overturn a "late of *oup into his 1reeches; which! with the many Apologies he made! and the "arson+s gentle Answers! caused much .irth in the 'ompany. ?o e the third was performed by one of the *erving0men! who had been ordered to convey a >uantity of 4in into .r. Adams*s Ale! which he declaring to be the best $iquor he ever dran ! but rather too rich of the .alt! contributed again to their

$aughter. .r. Adams, from whom we had most of this Relation! could not recollect all the ?ests of this ind practised on him! which the inoffensive &isposition of his own (eart made him slow in discovering; and indeed! had it not been for the Information which we received from a *ervant of the )amily! this "art of our (istory! which we ta e to be none of the least curious! must have been deplorably imperfect; tho+ we must own it probable! that some more ?o es were 8as they call it9 crac"ed during their &inner; but we have by no means been able to come at the 2nowledge of them. #hen &inner was removed! the "oet began to repeat some Verses! which he said were made e8tempore. %he following is a 'opy of them! procured with the greatest difficulty. An extempore Poem on Parson Adams. )id ever $ortal such a Parson view; 1is Cassoc" old, his Wig not over,new3 Well might the 1ounds have him for -o8 mista"en, .n 'mell more li"e to that, than rusty %acon %ut would it not ma"e any $ortal stare, (o 'ee this Parson ta"en for a 1are3 Could Phoebus err thus grossly, even he -or a good Player might have ta"en thee. At which #ords the 1ard whip+d off the "layer+s #ig! and received the Approbation of the 'ompany! rather perhaps for the &exterity of his (and than his (ead. %he "layer! instead of retorting the ?est on the "oet! began to display his %alents on the same *ub7ect. (e repeated many *craps of #it out of "lays! reflecting on the whole 1ody of the 'lergy! which were received with great Acclamations by all present. It was now the &ancing0.aster+s %urn to exhibit his %alents; he therefore addressing himself to Adams in bro en &nglish, told him! :(e was a .an ver well made for de &ance! and he suppose by his #al ! dat he had learn of some great .aster. (e said it was ver pretty >uality in 'lergyman to dance;: and concluded with desiring him to dance a .inuet! telling him! :his 'assoc would serve for "etticoats; and that he would himself be his "artner.: At which #ords! without waiting for an Answer! he pulled out his 4loves! and the )iddler was preparing his )iddle. %he 'ompany all offered the &ancing0.aster #agers that the "arson outdanced him! which he refused! saying! :(e believed so too; for he had never seen any .an in his $ife who loo ed de &ance so well as de 4entleman-: (e then stepped forwards to ta e Adams by the (and! which he hastily withdrew! and at the same time clenching his )ist! advised him not to carry the ?est too far! for he would not endure being put upon. %he &ancing master no sooner saw the )ist than he prudently retired out of it+s reach! and stood aloof mimic ing Adams, whose Eyes were fixed on him! not guessing what he was at! but to avoid his laying hold on him! which he had once attempted. In the mean while! the 'aptain perceiving an ,pportunity pinned a 'rac er or &evil to the 'assoc ! and then lighted it with their little smoa ing 'andle. Adams being a *tranger to this *port! and believing he had been blown up in reality! started from his 'hair! and 7umped about the Room! to the infinite ?oy of the 1eholders! who declared he was the best &ancer in the @niverse. As soon as the &evil had done tormenting him! and he had a little recovered his 'onfusion! he returned to the %able! and standing up in the "osture of one who intended to ma e a *peech! they all cried out! 1ear him, 1ear 1im; and he then spo e in the following manner- :*ir! I am sorry to see one to whom "rovidence hath been so bountiful in bestowing his )avours! ma e so ill and ungrateful a Return for them; for tho+ you have not insulted me yourself! it is visible you have delighted in those that do it! nor have once discouraged the many Rudenesses which have been shewn towards me; indeed towards yourself! if you rightly understood them; for I am your 4uest! and by the $aws of (ospitality entitled to your "rotection. ,ne 4entleman hath thought proper to produce some "oetry upon me! of which I shall only say! that I had rather be the *ub7ect than the 'omposer. (e hath pleased to treat me with &isrespect as a "arson; I apprehend my ,rder is not the ,b7ect of *corn! nor that I can become so! unless by being a &isgrace to it! which I hope "overty will never be called. Another 4entleman indeed hath repeated some *entences! where the ,rder itself is mentioned with 'ontempt. (e says they are ta en from "lays. I am sure such "lays are a *candal to the 4overnment which permits them! and cursed will be the /ation where they are represented. (ow others have treated me! I need not observe; they themselves! when they reflect! must allow the 1ehaviour to be as

improper to my Aears as to my 'loth. Aou found me! *ir! travelling with two of my "arishioners! 8I omit your (ounds falling on me; for I have quite forgiven it! whether it proceeded from the #antonness or /egligence of the (untsman!9 my Appearance might very well persuade you that your Invitation was an Act of 'harity! tho+ in reality we were well provided; yes! *ir! if we had had an hundred .iles to travel! we had sufficient to bear our Expences in a noble manner.: 8At which #ords he produced the half 4uinea which was found in the 1as et9 :I do not shew you this out of ,stentation of Riches! but to convince you I spea %ruth. Aour seating me at your %able was an (onour which I did not ambitiously affect; when I was here! I endeavoured to behave towards you with the utmost Respect; if I have failed! it was not with &esign! nor could I! certainly! so far be guilty as to deserve the Insults I have suffered. If they were meant therefore either to my ,rder or my "overty 8and you see I am not so very poor9 the *hame doth not lie at my door! and I heartily pray! that the *in may be averted from your+s.: (e thus finished! and received a general 'lap from the whole 'ompany. %hen the 4entleman of the (ouse told him! :he was sorry for what had happened; that he could not accuse him of any *hare in it- %hat the Verses were! as himself had well observed! so bad! that he might easily answer them; and for the *erpent! it was undoubtedly a very great Affront done him by the &ancing0.aster! for which if he well thrashed him! as he deserved! he should be very much pleased to see it;: 8in which probably he spo e %ruth.9 Adams answered! :#hoever had done it! it was not his "rofession to punish him that way; but for the "erson whom he had accused! I am a #itness! says he! of his Innocence. )or I had my Eye on him all the while. #hoever he was! 4od forgive him! and bestow on him a little more *ense as well as (umanity.: %he 'aptain answer+d with a surly $oo and Accent! :%hat he hoped he he did not mean to reflect on him; d<n him! he had as much .manity as another! and if any .an said he had not! he would convince him of his .ista e by cutting his %hroat.: Adams smiling! said! :(e believed he had spo e right by Accident.: %o which the 'aptain returned! :#hat do you mean by my spea ing right= if you was not a "arson! I would not ta e these #ords; but your 4own protects you. If any .an who wears a *word had said so much! I had pulled him by the /ose before this.: Adams replied! :If he attempted any Rudeness to his "erson! he would not find any "rotection for himself in his 4own;: and clenching his )ist! declared he had threshed many a stouter .an. %he 4entleman did all he could to encourage the warli e &isposition in Adams, and was in hopes to have produced a 1attle- 1ut he was disappointed; for the 'aptain made no other Answer than! :It is very well you are a "arson!: and so drin ing off a 1umper to old .other 'hurch! ended the &ispute. %hen the &octor! who had hitherto been silent! and who was the gravest! but most mischievous &og of all! in a very pompous *peech highly applauded what Adams had said; and as much discommended the 1ehaviour to him; he proceeded to Encomiums on the 'hurch and "overty; and lastly recommended )orgiveness of what had past to Adams, who immediately answered! :%hat every thing was forgiven;: and in the #armth of his 4oodness he filled a 1umper of strong 1eer! 8a $iquor he preferred to #ine9 and dran a (ealth to the whole 'ompany! sha ing the 'aptain and the "oet heartily by the (and! and addressing himself with great Respect to the &octor; who indeed had not laughed outwardly at any thing that past! as he had a perfect 'ommand of his .uscles! and could laugh inwardly without betraying the least *ymptoms in his 'ountenance. %he &octor now began a second formal *peech! in which he declaimed against all $evity of 'onversation; and what is usually called .irth. (e said! :%here were Amusements fitted for "ersons of all Ages and &egrees! from the Rattle to the discussing a "oint of "hilosophy! and that .en discovered themselves in nothing more than in the 'hoice of their Amusements; for!: says he! :as it must greatly raise our Expectation of the future 'onduct in $ife of 1oys! whom in their tender Aears we perceive instead of %aw or 1alls! or other childish "lay0things! to chuse! at their $eisure0(ours! to exercise their 4enius in 'ontentions of #it! $earning! and such li e; so must it inspire one with equal 'ontempt of a .an! if we should discover him playing at %aw or other childish "lay.: Adams highly commended the &octor+s ,pinion! and said! :(e had often wondered at some "assages in ancient Authors! where 'cipio, L9lius, and other great .en were represented to have passed many (ours in Amusements of the most trifling ind.: %he &octor reply+d! :(e had by him an old #ree" .anuscript where a favourite &iversion of 'ocrates was recorded.: :Ay!: says the "arson eagerly! :I should be most infinitely obliged to you for the )avour of perusing it.: %he &octor promised to send it him! and farther said! :that he believed he could describe it. I thin !: says he! :as near as I can remember! it was this. %here was a %hrone erected! on one side of which sat a 2ing! and on the

other a >ueen! with their 4uards and Attendants ranged on both sides; to them was introduced an Ambassador! which "art 'ocrates always used to perform himself; and when he was led up to the )ootsteps of the %hrone! he addressed himself to the .onarchs in some grave *peech! full of Virtue and 4oodness! and .orality! and such li e. After which! he was seated between the 2ing and >ueen! and royally entertained. %his I thin was the chief part. <"erhaps I may have forgot some "articulars; for it is long since I read it.: Adams said! :It was indeed a &iversion worthy the Relaxation of so great a .an; and thought something resembling it should be instituted among our great .en! instead of 'ards and other idle "asstime! in which he was informed they trifled away too much of their $ives. (e added! the 'hristian Religion was a nobler *ub7ect for these *peeches than any 'ocrates could have invented.: %he 4entleman of the (ouse approved what .r. Adams said! and declared! :he was resolved to perform the 'eremony this very Evening.: %o which the &octor ob7ected! as no one was prepared with a *peech! unless said he! 8turning to Adams with a 4ravity of 'ountenance which would have deceived a more nowing .an9 :you have a *ermon about you! &octor. < *ir!: says Adams, :I never travel without one! for fear what may happen.: (e was easily prevailed on by his worthy )riend! as he now called the &octor! to underta e the "art of the Ambassador; so that the 4entleman sent immediate ,rders to have the %hrone erected; which was performed before they had dran two 1ottles- And perhaps the Reader will hereafter have no great reason to admire the /imbleness of the *ervants. Indeed! to confess the %ruth! the %hrone was no more than this; there was a great %ub of #ater provided! on each side of which were placed two *tools raised higher than the *urface of the %ub! and over the #hole was laid a 1lan et; on these *tools were placed the 2ing and >ueen! namely! the .aster of the (ouse! and the 'aptain. And now the Ambassador was introduced! between the "oet and the &octor! who having read his *ermon to the great Entertainment of all present! was led up to his "lace! and being seated between their .a7esties! they immediately rose up! when the 1lan et wanting its *upports at either end! gave way! and soused Adams over (ead and Ears in the #ater; the 'aptain made his Escape! but unluc ily the 4entleman himself not being as nimble as he ought! Adams caught hold of him before he descended from his %hrone! and pulled him in with him! to the entire secret *atisfaction of all the 'ompany. Adams after duc ing the *quire twice or thrice leapt out of the %ub! and loo ed sharp for the &octor! whom he would certainly have convey+d to the same "lace of (onour; but he had wisely withdrawn- he then searched for his 'rabstic ! and having found that! as well as his )ellow0%ravellers! he declared he would not stay a moment longer in such a (ouse. (e then departed! without exacted leave of his (ost! whom he had ta en a more severe Revenge on! than he intended- )or as he did not use sufficient care to dry himself in time! he caught a 'old by the Accident! which threw him into a )ever! that had li e to have cost him his $ife. '(A". VII. Which some 7eaders will thin" too short, and others too long. Adams, and !oseph, who was no less enraged than his )riend! at the %reatment he met with! went out with their *tic s in their (ands; and carried off -anny, notwithstanding the ,pposition of the *ervants! who did all! without proceeding to Violence! in their power to detain them. %hey wal ed as fast as they could! not so much from any Apprehension of being pursued! as that .r. Adams might by Exercise prevent any harm from the #ater. %he 4entleman who had given such ,rders to his *ervants concerning -anny, that he did not in the least fear her getting away! no sooner heard that she was gone! than he began to rave! and immediately dispatched several with ,rders! either to bring her bac ! or never return. %he "oet! the "layer! and all but the &ancing0master and &octor went on this Errand. %he /ight was very dar ! in which our )riends began their ?ourney; however they made such Expedition! that they soon arrived at an Inn! which was at seven .iles &istance. (ere they unanimously consented to pass the Evening! .r. Adams being now as dry as he was before he had set out on his Embassy. %his Inn! which indeed we might call an Ale0house! had not the #ords! (he ew .nn, been writ on the *ign! afforded them no better "rovision than 1read and 'heese! and Ale; on which! however! they made a very comfortable .eal; for (unger is better than a -rench 'oo . %hey had no sooner supped! than Adams returning %han s to the Almighty for his )ood! declared he had eat his homely 'ommons! with much greater *atisfaction than his splendid &inner! and exprest great 'omtempt

for the )olly of .an ind! who sacrificed their (opes of (eaven to the Acquisition of vast #ealth! since so much 'omfort was to be found in the humblest *tate and the lowest "rovision. Very true! *ir! says a grave .an who sat smoa ing his "ipe by the )ire! and who was a %raveller as well as himself. :I have often been as much surpri5ed as you are! when I consider the Value which .an ind in general set on Riches! since every day+s Experience shews us how little is in their power; for what indeed truly desirable can they bestow on us= 'an they give 1eauty to the &eformed! *trength to the #ea ! or (ealth to the Infirm= *urely if they could! we should not see so many ill0favoured )aces haunting the Assemblies of the 4reat! nor would such numbers of feeble #retches languish in their 'oaches and "alaces. /o! not the #ealth of a 2ingdom can purchase any "aint! to dress pale @gliness in the 1loom of that young .aiden! nor any &rugs to equip &isease with the Vigour of that young .an. &o not Riches bring us *ollicitude instead of Rest! Envy instead of Affection! and &anger instead of *afety= 'an they prolong their own "ossession! or lengthen his &ays who en7oys them= *o far otherwise! that the *loth! the $uxury! the 'are which attend them! shorten the $ives of .illions! and bring them with "ain and .isery! to an untimely 4rave. #here then is their Value! if they can neither embellish! or strengthen our )orms! sweeten or prolong our $ives= Again<'an they adorn the .ind more than the 1ody= &o they not rather swell the (eart with Vanity! puff up the 'hee s with "ride! shut our Ears to every 'all of Virtue! and our 1owels to every .otive of 'ompassionB: :4ive me your (and! 1rother!: said Adams in a Rapture; :for I suppose you are a 'lergyman.: :/o truly!: answered the other! 8indeed he was a "riest of the 'hurch of 7ome; but those who understand our $aws will not wonder he was not over0ready to own it.9 :#hatever you are!: cries Adams, :you have spo en my *entiments- I believe I have preached every *yllable of your *peech twenty times over- )or it hath always appeared to me easier for a 'able Rope 8which by the way is the true rendering of that #ord we have translated Camel9 to go through the Eye of a /eedle! than for a rich .an to get into the 2ingdom of (eaven!: :%hat! *ir!: said the other! :will be easily granted you by &ivines! and is deplorably true- 1ut as the "rospect of our 4ood at a distance doth not so forcibly affect us! it might be of some *ervice to .an ind to be made thoroughly sensible! which I thin they might be with very little serious Attention! that even the 1lessings of this #orld! are not to be purchased with Riches. A &octrine in my ,pinion! not only metaphysically! but if I may so say! mathematically demonstrable; and which I have been always so perfectly convinced of! that I have a 'ontempt for nothing so much as for 4old.: Adams now began a long &iscourse; but as most which he said occurs among many Authors! who have treated this *ub7ect! I shall omit inserting it. &uring its 'ontinuance !oseph and -anny retired to Rest! and the (ost li ewise left the Room. #hen the &nglish "arson had concluded! the 7omish resumed the &iscourse! which he continued with great 1itterness and Invective; and at last ended by desiring Adams to lend him eighteen "ence to pay his Rec oning; promising! if he never paid him! he might be assured of his "rayers. %he good .an answered! that eighteen "ence would be too little to carry him any very long ?ourney; that he had half a 4uinea in his "oc et! which he would divide with him. (e then fell to searching his "oc ets! but could find no .oney- )or indeed the 'ompany with whom he dined! had past one ?est upon him which we did not then enumerate! and had pic ed his "oc et of all that %reasure which he had so ostentatiously produced. :1less me!: cry+d Adams, :I have certainly lost it! I can never have spent it. *ir! as I am a 'hristian I had a whole half 4uinea in my "oc et this .orning! and have not now a single (alfpenny of it left. *ure the &evil must have ta en it from me.: :*ir!: answered the "riest smiling! :Aou need ma e no Excuses; if you are not willing to lend me the .oney! I am contented.: :*ir!: cries Adams, :if I had the greatest *um in the #orld; ay! if I had ten "ounds about me! I would bestow it all to rescue any 'hristian from &istress. I am more vexed at my $oss on your account than my own. #as ever any thing so unluc y= because I have no .oney in my "oc et! I shall be suspected to be no 'hristian.: :I am more unluc y!: quoth the other! :if you are as generous as you say- )or really a 'rown would have made me happy! and conveyed me in plenty to the "lace I am going! which is not above twenty .iles off! and where I can arrive by to0morrow /ight. I assure you I am not accustomed to travel "ennyless- 1ut am 7ust arrived in &ngland, and we were forced by a *torm in our "assage to throw all we had overboard. I don+t suspect but this )ellow will ta e my #ord for the %rifle I owe him; but I hate to appear so mean as to confess myself without a *hilling to such "eople- )or these! and indeed too many others now little &ifference in their Estimation between a 1eggar and a %hief.: (owever! he thought he should deal better with the (ost that Evening than the next .orning; he therefore resolved to

set out immediately! notwithstanding the &ar ness; and accordingly as soon as the (ost returned he communicated to him the *ituation of his Affairs; upon which the (ost scratching his (ead! answered! :#hy! I do not now! .aster! if it be so! and you have no .oney! I must trust I thin ! tho+ I had rather always have ready .oney if I could; but! marry! you loo li e so honest a 4entleman! that I don+t fear your paying me! if it was twenty times as much.: %he "riest made no Reply! ta ing leave of him and Adams, as fast as he could! not without 'onfusion! and perhaps with some &istrust of Adams*s *incerity! departed. (e was no sooner gone than the (ost fell a sha ing his (ead! and declared if he had suspected the )ellow had no .oney! he would not have drawn him a single &rop of &rin ; saying! he despaired of ever seeing his )ace again; for that he loo ed li e a confounded Rogue. :Rabbit the )ellow!: cries he! :I thought by his tal ing so much about Riches! that he had a hundred "ounds at least in his "oc et.: Adams chid him for his *uspicions! which he said were not becoming a 'hristian; and then without reflecting on his $oss! or considering how he himself should depart in the .orning! he retired to a very homely 1ed! as his 'ompanions had before; however! (ealth and )atigue gave them a sweeter Repose than is often in the power of Velvet and &own to bestow. '(A". VIII. Containing as surpri2ing and bloody Adventures as can be found in this, or perhaps any other authentic 1istory. It was almost .orning when !oseph Andrews, whose Eyes the %houghts of his dear -anny had opened! as he lay fondly meditating on that lovely 'reature! heard a violent noc ing at the &oor over which he lay; he presently 7umped out of 1ed! and opening the #indow! was as ed if there were no %ravellers in the (ouse; and presently by another Voice! If two .en and a young #oman had not ta en up their $odgings there that /ight. %ho+ he new not the Voices! he began to entertain a *uspicion of the %ruth; for indeed he had received some Information from one of the *ervants of the *quire+s (ouse! of his &esign; and answered in the /egative. ,ne of the *ervants who new the (ost well! called out to him by his /ame! 7ust as he had opened another #indow! and as ed him the same >uestion; to which he answered in the Affirmative. , hoB said another; (ave we found you= And ordered the (ost to come down and open his &oor. -anny, who was as wa eful as !oseph, no sooner heard all this! than she leap+d from her 1ed! and hastily putting on her 4own and "etticoats! ran as fast as possible to !oseph*s Room! who then was almost drest; he immediately let her in! and embracing her with the most passionate %enderness! bid her fear nothing- )or he would die in her &efence. :Is that a Reason why I should not fear!: says she! :when I should lose what is dearer to me than the whole #orld=: !oseph then issing her (and! said he could almost than the ,ccasion which had extorted from her a %enderness she would never indulge him with before. (e then ran and wa ed his 1edfellow Adams, who was yet fast asleep! notwithstanding many 'alls from !oseph- 1ut was no sooner made sensible of their &anger than he leaped from his 1ed! without considering the "resence of -anny, who hastily turned her )ace from him! and en7oyed a double 1enefit from the dar ! which as it would have prevented any ,ffence to an Innocence less pure! or a .odesty less delicate! so it concealed even those 1lushes which were raised in her. A)A$' had soon put on all his 'lothes but his 1reeches! which in the (urry he forgot; however! they were pretty well supplied by the length of the rest- And now the (ouse0&oor being opened! the 'aptain! the "oet! the "layer! and N *ervants came in. %he 'aptain told the (ost! that the F )ellows who were in his (ouse had run away with a young #oman! and desired to now in which Room she lay. %he (ost! who presently believed the *tory! directed them! and instantly the 'aptain and "oet! 7ostling one another! ran up. %he "oet who was the nimblest entering the 'hamber! first searched the 1ed and every other part! but to no purpose; the 1ird was flown! as the impatient Reader! who might otherwise have been in pain for her! was before advertised. %hey then enquired where the .en lay! and were approaching the 'hamber! when !oseph roared out in a loud Voice! that he would shoot the first .an who offered to attac the &oor. %he 'aptain enquired what )ire0Arms they had; to which the (ost answered! he believed they had none; nay! he was almost convinced of it- )or he had heard one as the other in the Evening! what they should have done! if they had been overta en when they had no Arms; to which the other answered! they would have defended themselves

with their *tic s as long as they were able! and 4< would assist a 7ust 'ause. %his satisfied the 'aptain! but not the "oet! who prudently retreated down *tairs! saying it was his 1usiness to record great Actions! and not to do them. %he 'aptain was no sooner well satisfied that there were no )ire0Arms! than bidding &efiance to 4unpowder! and swearing he loved the *mell of it! he ordered the *ervants to follow him! and marching boldly up! immediately attempted to force the &oor! which the *ervants soon helped him to accomplish. #hen it was opened! they discovered the Enemy drawn up three deep; Adams in the )ront! and -anny in the Rear. %he 'aptain told Adams, that if they would go all bac to the (ouse again! they should be civilly treated- but unless they consented! he had ,rders to carry the young $ady with him! whom there was great Reason to believe they had stolen from her "arents; for notwithstanding her &isguise! her Air! which she could not conceal! sufficiently discovered her 1irth to be infinitely superiour to theirs. -anny bursting into %ears! solemnly assured him he was mista en; that she was a poor helpless )oundling! and had no Relation in the #orld which she new of; and throwing herself on her 2nees! begged that he would not attempt to ta e her from her )riends! who she was convinced would die before they would lose her! which Adams confirmed with #ords not far from amounting to an ,ath. %he 'aptain swore he had no leisure to tal ! and bidding them than themselves for what happened! he ordered the *ervants to fall on! at the same time endeavouring to pass by Adams in order to lay hold on -anny; but the "arson interrupting him! received a 1low from one of them! which without considering whence it came! he returned to the 'aptain! and gave him so dextrous a 2noc in that part of the *tomach which is vulgarly called the "it! that he staggered some "aces bac wards. %he 'aptain! who was not accustomed to this ind of play! and who wisely apprehended the 'onsequence of such another 1low! two of them seeming to him equal to a %hrust through the 1ody! drew forth his (anger! as Adams approached him! and was levelling a 1low at his (ead! which would probably have silenced the "reacher for ever! had not !oseph in that Instant lifted up a certain huge *tone "ot of the 'hamber with one (and! which six 1eaus could not have lifted with both! and discharged it! together with the 'ontents! full in the 'aptain+s )ace. %he uplifted (anger dropped from his (and! and he fell prostrate on the )loor with a lumpish oise, and his 1alfpence rattled in his Poc"et ; the red $iquour which his Veins contained! and the white $iquor which the "ot contained! ran in one *tream down his )ace and his 'lothes. /or had Adams quite escaped! some of the #ater having in its "assage shed its (onours on his (ead! and began to tric le down the #rin les or rather )urrows of his 'hee s! when one of the *ervants snatching a .op out of a "ail of #ater which had already done its &uty in washing the (ouse! pushed it in the "arson+s )ace; yet could not he bear him; down for the "arson wresting the .op out of his (ands! with the other brought his Enemy as low as the Earth! having given him a *tro e over that part of the )ace! where! in some .en of "leasure! the natural and artificial /oses are con7oined. (itherto )ortune seemed to incline the Victory on the %ravellers side! when! according to her 'ustom! she began to shew the )ic leness of her &isposition- for now the (ost entering the )ield! or rather 'hamber! of 1attle! flew directly at !oseph, and darting his (ead into his *tomach 8for he was a stout )ellow! and an expert 1oxer9 almost staggered him; but !oseph stepping one $eg bac ! did with his left (and so chuc him under the 'hin that he reeled. %he Aouth was pursuing his 1low with his right (and! when he received from one of the *ervants such a *tro e with a 'udgel on his %emples! that it instantly deprived him of *ense! and he measured his $ength on the 4round. -A 4 rent the Air with her 'ries! and Adams was coming to the assistance of !oseph- but the two *erving0 .en and the (ost now fell on him! and soon subdued him! tho+ he fought li e a .adman! and loo ed so blac with the Impressions he had received from the .op! that )on Eui8otte would certainly have ta en him for an inchanted $oor. 1ut now follows the most tragical "art; for the 'aptain being risen again! and seeing !oseph on the )loor! and Adams secured! he instantly laid hold on -anny, and with the Assistance of the "oet and "layer! who hearing the 1attle was over! were now come up! dragged her! crying and tearing her (air! from the *ight of her !oseph, and with a perfect &eafness to all her Entreaties! carried her down *tairs by Violence! and fastened her on the "layer+s (orse; and the 'aptain mounting his own! and leading that on which this poor miserable #retch was! departed without anymore 'onsideration of her 'ries than a 1utcher hath of those of a $amb; for indeed his %houghts were only entertained with the &egree of )avour which he promised himself from the *quire on the *uccess of this Adventure.

%he *ervants who were ordered to secure Adams and !oseph as safe as possible! that the +*quire might receive no Interruption to his &esign on poor -anny, immediately by the "oet+s Advice tied Adams to one of the 1ed0posts! with his (ands behind him! as they did !oseph on the other side! as soon as they could bring him to himself; and then leaving them together! bac to bac ! and desiring the (ost not to set them at liberty! nor go near them till he had farther ,rders! they departed towards their .aster; but happened to ta e a different Road from that which the 'aptain had fallen into. '(A". IC. A )iscourse between the Poet and Player; of no other Dse in this 1istory, but to divert the 7eader. 1efore we proceed any farther in this %ragedy! we shall leave .r. !oseph and .r. Adams to themselves! and imitate the wise 'onductors of the *tage; who in the midst of a grave Action entertain you with some excellent piece of *atire or (umour called a &ance. #hich "iece indeed is therefore danced! and not spo e! as it is delivered to the Audience by "ersons whose thin ing )aculty is by most "eople held to lie in their (eels; and to whom! as well as (eroes! who thin with their (ands! /ature hath only given (eads for the sa e of 'onformity! and as they are of use in &ancing! to hang their (ats on. %he "oet addressing the "layer! proceeded thus- :As I was saying 8for they had been at this &iscourse all the time of the Engagement! above *tairs9 :the Reason you have no good new "lays is evident; it is from your &iscouragement of Authors. 4entlemen will not write! *ir! they will not write without the Expectation of )ame or "rofit! or perhaps both. "lays are li e %rees which will not grow without /ourishment; but li e .ushrooms! they shoot up spontaneously! as it were! in a rich *oil. %he .uses! li e Vines! may be pruned! but not with a (atchet. %he %own! li e a peevish 'hild! nows not what it desires! and is always best pleased with a Rattle. A )arce0#riter hath indeed some 'hance for *uccess; but they have lost all %aste for the *ublime. %ho+ I believe one Reason of their &epravity is the 1adness of the Actors. If a .an writes li e an Angel! *ir! those )ellows now not how to give a *entiment @tterance.: :/ot so fast!: says the "layer! :the modern Actors are as good at least as their Authors! nay! they come nearer their illustrious "redecessors! and I expect a %ooth on the *tage again! sooner than a 'ha"espear or an Otway; and indeed I may turn your ,bservation against you! and with %ruth say! that the Reason no Authors are encouraged! is because we have no good new "lays.: :I have not affirmed the contrary!: said the "oet! :but I am surpri5ed you grow so warm; you cannot imagine yourself interested in this &ispute! I hope you have a better ,pinion of my %aste! than to apprehend I squinted at yourself. /o! *ir! if we had six such Actors as you! we should soon rival the %ettertons and 'andfords of former %imes; for! without a 'ompliment to you! I thin it impossible for any one to have excelled you in most of your "arts. /ay! it is solemn %ruth! and I have heard many! and all great ?udges! express as much; and you will pardon me if I tell you! I thin every time I have seen you lately! you have constantly acquired some new Excellence! li e a *nowball. Aou have deceived me in my Estimation of "erfection! and have outdone what I thought inimitable.: :Aou are as little interested!: answer+d the "layer! in what I have said of other "oets; for d<n me! if there are not manly *tro es! ay whole *cenes! in your last %ragedy! which at least equal 'ha"espear. %here is a &elicacy of *entiment! a &ignity of Expression in it! which I will own many of our 4entlemen did not do adequate ?ustice to. %o confess the %ruth! they are bad enough! and I pity an Author who is present at the .urder of his #or s :</ay! it is but seldom that it can happen!: returned the "oet! :the #or s of most modern Authors! li e dead0born 'hildren! cannot be murdered. It is such wretched half0begotten! half0writ! lifeless! spiritless! low! groveling *tuff! that I almost pity the Actor who is oblig+d to get it by heart! which must be almost as difficult to remember as #ords in a $anguage you don+t understand.: :I am sure!: said the "layer! :if the *entences have little .eaning when they are writ! when they are spo en they have less. I now scarce one who ever lays an Emphasis right! and much less adapts his Action to his 'haracter. I have seen a tender $over in an Attitude of fighting with his .istress! and a brave (ero suing to his Enemy with his *word in his (and<I don+t care to abuse my "rofession! but rot me if in my (eart I am not inclined to the "oet+s *ide.: :It is rather generous in you than 7ust!: said the "oet; :and tho+ I hate to spea ill of any "erson+s "roduction; nay I never do it! nor will<but yet to do ?ustice to the Actors! what could %ooth or %etterton have made of such horrible *tuff as -enton*s $ariamne, -rowd*s Philotas, or $allet*s &urydice, or those low! dirty! last &ying0*peeches! which a )ellow

in the 'ity or Wapping, your )illo or Lillo, what was his /ame! called %ragedies=: :<Very well! *ir!: says the "layer! and pray what do you thin of such )ellows as Euin and )elane, or that face0ma ing "uppy young Cibber, that ill0loo ed &og $ac"lin, or that saucy *lut .rs. Clive= #hat wor would they ma e with your 'ha"espeares, Otways and Lees= (ow would those harmonious $ines of the last come from their %ongues= 6; o more; for . disdain 6All Pomp when thou art by;far be the oise 6Of 0ings and Crowns from us, whose gentle 'ouls 6Our "inder -ates have steer*d another way. 6-ree as the -orest %irds we*ll pair together, 6Without rememb*ring who our -athers were+ 6-ly to the Arbor*s #rots and flowry $eads, 6(here in soft $urmurs interchange our 'ouls, 6(ogether drin" the Crystal of the 'tream, 6Or taste the yellow -ruit which Autumn yields. 6And when the golden &vening calls us home, 6Wing to our downy ests and sleep till $orn. :,r how would this &isdain of Otway,: Who*d be that foolish, sordid thing, call*d $an36 :(old! hold! hold!: said the "oet! :&o repeat that tender *peech in the third Act of my "lay which you made such a )igure in:<:I would willingly! said the "layer! :but I have forgot it:< :Ay! you was not quite perfect enough in it when you play+d it! cries the "oet! or you would have had such an Applause as was never given on the *tage; an Applause I was extremely concerned for your losing.: <:*ure!: says the "layer! :if I remember! that was hiss+d more than any "assage in the whole "lay:0:Ay your spea ing it was hiss+d!: said the "oet. :.y spea ing itB: said the "layer. <:I mean your not spea ing it.: said the "oet. :Aou was out! and then they hiss+d:0:%hey hiss+d! and then I was out! if I remember!: answer+d the "layer; :and I must say this for myself! that the whole Audience allowed I did your "art ?ustice! so don+t lay the &amnation of your "lay to my account.: :I don+t now what you mean by &amnation!: reply+d the "oet. :#hy you now it was acted but one /ight!: cried the "layer. :/o!: said the "oet! :you and the whole %own now I had Enemies; the "it were all my Enemies! )ellows that would cut my %hroat! if the )ear of (anging did not restrain them. All %aylors! *ir! all %aylors:. <:#hy should the %aylors be so angry with you=: cries the "layer. I suppose you don+t employ so many in ma ing your 'lothes.: :I admit your ?est!: answered the "oet! :but you remember the Affair as well as myself; you now there was a "arty in the "it and @pper04allery! would not suffer it to be given out again; tho+ much! ay infinitely! the .a7ority! all the 1oxes in particular! were desirous of it; nay! most of the $adies swore they never would come to the (ouse till it was acted again<Indeed I must own their "olicy was good! in not letting it be given out a second time; for the Rascals new if it had gone a second /ight! it would have run fifty- for if ever there was &istress in a %ragedy <I am not fond of my own "erformance; but if I should tell you what the best ?udges said of it</or was it entirely owing to my Enemies neither! that it did not succeed on the *tage as well as it hath since among the polite Readers; for you can+t say it had ?ustice done it by the "erformers.: <:I thin !: answer+d the "layer! :the "erformers did the &istress of it ?ustice- for I am sure we were in &istress enough! who were pelted with ,ranges all the last Act; we all imagined it would have been the last Act of our $ives.: %he "oet! whose )ury was now raised! had 7ust attempted to answer! when they were interrupted! and an end put to their &iscourse by an Accident; which! if the Reader is impatient to now! he must s ip over the next 'hapter! which is a sort of 'ounterpart to this! and contains some of the best and gravest .atters in the whole 1oo ! being a &iscourse between "arson Abraham Adams and .r. !oseph Andrews.

'(A". C.

Containing the &8hortations of Parson Adams to his -riend in Affliction; calculated for the .nstruction and .mprovement of the 7eader. !oseph no sooner came perfectly to himself! than perceiving his .istress gone! he bewailed her $oss with 4roans! which would have pierced any (eart but those which are possessed by some "eople! and are made of a certain 'omposition not unli e )lint in its (ardness and other "roperties; for you may stri e )ire from them which will dart through the Eyes! but they can never distil one &rop of #ater the same way. (is own! poor Aouth! was of a softer 'omposition; and at those #ords! O my dear )annyB O my Love5 shall . never, never see thee more= his Eyes overflowed with %ears! which would have become any thing but a (ero. In a word! his &espair was more easy to be conceived than related.< .r. Adams, after many 4roans! sitting with his 1ac to !oseph, began thus in a sorrowful %one- :Aou cannot imagine! my good 'hild! that I entirely blame these first Agonies of your 4rief; for! when .isfortunes attac us by *urpri5e! it must require infinitely more $earning than you are master of to resist them- but it is the 1usiness of a .an and a 'hristian to summon Reason as quic ly as he can to his Aid; and she will presently teach him "atience and *ubmission. 1e comforted! therefore! 'hild! I say be comforted. It is true you have lost the prettiest! indest! loveliest! sweetest young #oman- ,ne with whom you might have expected to have lived in (appiness! Virtue and Innocence. 1y whom you might have promised yourself many little &arlings! who would have been the &elight of your Aouth! and the 'omfort of your Age. Aou have not only lost her! but have reason to fear the utmost Violence which $ust and "ower can inflict upon her. /ow indeed you may easily raise Ideas of (orror! which might drive you to &espair.: <:, I shall run mad! cries !oseph, , that I could but command my (ands to tear my Eyes out and my )lesh off.: <:If you would use them to such "urposes! I am glad you can+t! answer+d Adams. I have stated your .isfortune as strong as I possibly can; but on the other side! you are to consider you are a 'hristian! that no Accident happens to us without the &ivine "ermission! and that it is the &uty of a .an and a 'hristian to submit. #e did not ma e ourselves; but the same "ower which made us! rules over us! and we are absolutely at his &isposal; he may do with us what he pleases! nor have we any Right to complain. A second Reason against our 'omplaint is our Ignorance; for as we now not future Events! so neither can we tell to what "urpose any Accident tends; and that which at first threatens us with Evil! may in the end produce our 4ood. I should indeed have said our Ignorance is twofold 8but I have not at present time to divide properly9 for as we now not to what purpose any Event is ultimately directed; so neither can we affirm from what 'ause it originally sprung. Aou are a .an! and consequently a *inner; and this may be a "unishment to you for your *ins; indeed in this *ense it may be esteemed as a 4ood! yea as the greatest 4ood! which satisfies the Anger of (eaven! and averts that #rath which cannot continue without our &estruction. %hirdly! ,ur Impotency of relieving ourselves! demonstrates the )olly and Absurdity of our 'omplaints- for whom do we resist= or against whom do we complain! but a "ower from whose *hafts no Armour can guard us! no *peed can fly= A "ower which leaves us no (ope! but in *ubmission.: <, *ir! cried !oseph, all this is very true! and very fine; and I could hear you all day! if I was not so grieved at (eart as now I am.: :#ould you ta e "hysic ! says Adams, when you are well! and refuse it when you are sic = Is not 'omfort to be administred to the Afflicted! and not to those who re7oice! or those who are at ease= <:, you have not spo en one #ord of 'omfort to me yet! returned !oseph.: :/oB cries Adams, #hat am I then doing= what can I say to comfort you=: <:, tell me! cries !oseph, that -anny will escape bac to my Arms! that they shall again inclose that lovely 'reature! with all her *weetness! all her untainted Innocence about her.: < :#hy perhaps you may! cries Adams; but I can+t promise you what+s to come. %he &octrine I teach you is a certain *ecurity <nay! it is not your Interest only! but your &uty to abstain from immoderate 4rief; which if you indulge! you are not worthy the /ame of a 'hristian.: <(e spo e these last #ords with an Accent a little severer than usual; upon which !oseph begged him not to be angry! saying he mistoo him! if he thought he denied it was his &uty; for he had nown that long ago. :#hat signifies nowing your &uty! if you do not perform it= answer+d Adams. Aour 2nowledge encreases your 4uilt<, !oseph, I never thought you had this *tubbornness in your .ind.: !oseph replied! he fancied he misunderstood him! which I assure you! you do! if you imagine I endeavour to grieve; upon my *oul I don+t. Adams rebu ed him for swearing! and then proceeded to enlarge on the )olly of 4rief! telling him! all the wise .an and "hilosophers! even among the (eathens! had written against it! quoting several "assages

from 'eneca, and the Consolation, which tho+ it was not Cicero*s, was as good almost as any of his #or s! and concluded all by saying! that immoderate 4rief in this 'ase might incense that "ower which alone could restore him his -anny. %his Reason! or indeed rather the Idea which it raised of the Restoration of his .istress! had more effect than all which the "arson had said before; and for a moment abated his Agoniesbut when his )ears sufficiently set before his Eyes the &anger that poor 'reature was in! his 4rief returned again with repeated Violence! nor could Adams in the least asswage it; tho+ it may be doubted in his 1ehalf! whether 'ocrates himself could have prevailed any better. %hey remained some time in silence; and 4roans and *ighs issued from them both! at length !oseph burst out into the following *oliloquy4es, . will bear my 'orrows li"e a $an, %ut . must also feel them as a $an. . cannot but remember such things were, And were most dear to me; Adams as ed him what *tuff that was he repeated= <%o which he answer+d! they were some $ines he had gotten by heart out of a "lay<:Ay! there is nothing but (eathenism to be learn+d from "lays! reply+d he<I never heard of any "lays fit for a 'hristian to read! but Cato and the Conscious Lovers; and I must own in the latter there are some things almost solemn enough for a *ermon.: 1ut we shall now leave them a little! and enquire after the *ub7ect of their 'onversation. '(A". CI. $ore Adventures, which we hope will as much please as surpri2e the 7eader. /either the facetious &ialogue which pass+d between the "oet and "layer! nor the grave and truly solemn &iscourse of .r. Adams, will! we conceive! ma e the Reader sufficient Amends for the Anxiety which he must have felt on the account of poor -anny, whom we left in so deplorable a 'ondition. #e shall therefore now proceed to the Relation of what happened to that beautiful and innocent Virgin! after she fell into the wic ed (ands of the 'aptain. %he .an of #ar having convey+d his charming "ri5e out of the Inn a little before &ay! made the utmost Expedition in his power towards the *quire+s (ouse! where this delicate 'reature was to be offered up a *acrifice to the $ust of a Ravisher. (e was not only deaf to all her 1ewailings and Entreaties on the Road! but accosted her Ears with Impurities! which! having been never before accustomed to them! she happily for herself very little understood. At last he changed this /ote! and attempted to sooth and mollify her! by setting forth the *plendor and $uxury which would be her )ortune with a .an who would have the Inclination! and "ower too! to give her whatever her utmost #ishes could desire; and told her he doubted not but she would soon loo inder on him! as the Instrument of her (appiness! and despise that pitiful )ellow! whom her Ignorance only could ma e her fond of. *he answered! the Riches of the #orld could not ma e her amends for the $oss of him; nor would she be persuaded to exchange him for the greatest "rince upon Earth<:I warrant ye!: cries the 'aptain! :we shall find means to persuade you; and I advise you to yield to gentle ones; for you may be assured that it is not in your power by any *truggles whatever to preserve your Virginity two (ours longer. It will be your Interest to consent; for the +*quire will be much inder to you if he en7oys you willingly than by force.: <At which #ords she began to call aloud for Assistance 8for it was now open &ay9 but finding none! she lifted her Eyes to (eaven! and supplicated the &ivine Assistance to preserve her Innocence. %he 'aptain told her! if she persisted in her Vociferation! he would find a means of stopping her .outh. And now the poor #retch perceiving no (opes of *uccour! abandoned herself to &espair! and sighing out the /ame of !oseph, !osephB a River of %ears ran down her lovely 'hee s! and wet the (and erchief which covered her 1osom. A (orseman now appeared in the Road! upon which the 'aptain threatened her violently if she complained; however! the moment they approached each other! she begged him with the utmost Earnestness to relieve a distressed 'reature! who was in the hands of a Ravisher. %he )ellow stopt at those #ords; but the 'aptain assured him it was his #ife! and that he was carrying her home from her Adulterer. #hich so satisfied the )ellow! who was an old one! 8and perhaps a married one too9 that he wished him a good ?ourney! and rode on. (e was no sooner past! than the 'aptain abused her violently for

brea ing his 'ommands! and threaten+d to gagg her; when two more (orsemen! armed with "istols! came into the Road 7ust before them. *he again sollicited their Assistance; and the 'aptain told the same *tory as before. @pon which one said to the other<:%hat+s a charming #enchB !ac"; I wish I had been the )ellow+s "lace whoever he is.: 1ut the other! instead of answering him! cried out eagerly! :Dounds! I now her-: and then turning to her said! :*ure you are not -anny #oodwill:<:Indeed! indeed I am!: she cry+d<:, (homas, I now you now<(eaven hath sent you to my Assistance! to deliver me from this wic ed .an! who is carrying me away for his vile "urposes<, for 4<+s sa e rescue me from him.: A fierce &ialogue immediately ensued between the 'aptain and these two .en! who being both armed with "istols! and the 'hariot which they attended being now arrived! the 'aptain saw both )orce and *tratagem were vain! and endeavoured to ma e his Escape; in which however he could not succeed. %he 4entleman who rode in the 'hariot! ordered it to stop! and with an Air of Authority examined into the .erits of the 'ause; of which being advertised by -anny, whose 'redit was confirmed by the )ellow who new her! he ordered the 'aptain! who was all bloody from his Encounter at the Inn! to be conveyed as a "risoner behind the 'hariot! and very gallantly too -anny into it; for! to say the truth! this 4entleman 8who was no other than .r. Peter Pounce, and who preceded the $ady %ooby only a few .iles! by setting out earlier in the .orning9 was a very gallant "erson! and loved a pretty 4irl better than any thing! besides his own .oney! or the .oney of other "eople. %he 'hariot now proceeded towards the Inn! which as -anny was informed lay in their way! and where it arrived at that very time while the "oet and "layer were disputing below *tairs! and Adams and !oseph were discoursing bac to bac above- 7ust at that "eriod to which we brought them both in the two preceding 'hapters! the 'hariot stopt at the &oor! and in an instant -anny leaping from it! ran up to her !oseph<, Reader! conceive if thou canst! the ?oy which fired the 1reasts of these $overs on this .eeting; and! if thy own (eart doth not sympathetically assist thee in this 'onception! I pity thee sincerely from my own- for let the hard0hearted Villain now this! that there is a "leasure in a tender *ensation beyond any which he is capable of tasting. P&(&7 being informed by -anny of the "resence of Adams, stopt to see him! and receive his (omage; for! as Peter was an (ypocrite! a sort of "eople whom .r. Adams never saw through; this paid that Respect to his 4oodness which the other attributed to be paid to his Riches; and hence .r. Adams was so much his )avourite! that he once lent him four "ounds thirteen *hillings and *ixpence! to prevent his going to 4oal! on no greater *ecurity than a 1ond and ?udgment! which probably he would have made no use of! tho+ the .oney had not been 8as it was9 paid exactly at the time. It is not perhaps easy to describe the )igure of Adams; he had risen in such a (urry! that he had on neither 1reeches! 4arters! nor *toc ings; nor had he ta en from his (ead a red spotted (and erchief! which by /ight bound his #ig! turned inside out! around his (ead. (e had on his torn 'assoc ! and his 4reat0'oat; but as the remainder of his 'assoc hung down below his 4reat 'oat; so did a small *trip of white! or rather whitish $innen appear below that; to which we may add the several 'olours which appeared on his )ace! vi2. a "iss0burnt 1eard! which served to retain the $iquor of the *tone "ot! and that of a blac er hue which distilled from the .op. <%his )igure! which -anny had delivered from his 'aptivity! was no sooner spied by Peter, than it disordered the composed 4ravity of his .uscles; however he advised him immediately to ma e himself clean! nor would accept his (omage in that "ic le. %he "oet and "layer no sooner saw the 'aptain in 'aptivity! than they began to consider of their own *afety! of which )light presented itself as the only means; they therefore both of them mounted the "oet+s (orse! and made the most expeditious Retreat in their power. %he (ost! who well new .r. Pounce and the $ady %ooby*s $ivery! was not a little surpri5ed at this change of the *cene! nor was his 'onfusion much helped by his #ife! who was now 7ust risen! and having heard the Account of what had past from him! comforted him with a decent /umber of )ools and 1loc heads! as ed him why he did not consult her! and told him he would never leave following the nonsensical &ictates of his own /umscull! till she and her )amily were ruined. !O'&P1 being informed of the 'aptain+s Arrival! and seeing his -anny now in *afety! quitted her a moment! and running down stairs! went directly to him! and stripping off his 'oat challenged him to fight; but the 'aptain refused! saying he did not understand 1oxing. (e then grasped a 'udgel in one (and! and catching

the 'aptain by the 'ollar with the other! he gave him a most severe &rubbing! and ended with telling him! he had now had some Revenge for what his dear -anny had suffered. #hen .r. Pounce had a little regaled himself with some "rovision which he had in his 'hariot! and .r. Adams had put on the best Appearance his 'lothes would allow him! Pounce ordered the 'aptain into his "resence; for he said he was guilty of )elony! and the next ?ustice of "eace should commit him- but the *ervants 8whose Appetite for Revenge is soon satisfied9 were sufficiently contented with the &rubbing which !oseph had inflicted on him! and which was indeed of no very moderate ind! and had suffered him to go off! which he did! threatening a severe Revenge against !oseph, which I have never heard he thought proper to ta e. %he .istress of the (ouse made her voluntary Appearance before .r. Pounce, and with a thousand 'urt+sies told him! she hoped his (onour would pardon her (usband! who was a very nonsense .an! for the sa e of his poor )amily; that indeed if he could be ruined alone! she should be very willing of it! for because as why, his #orship very well new he deserved it- but she had three poor small 'hildren! who were not capable to get their own $iving; and if her (usband was sent to 4oal! they must all come to the "arish; for she was a poor wea #oman! continually a breeding! and had no time to wor for them. *he therefore hoped his (onour would ta e it into his #orship+s 'onsideration! and forgive her (usband this time; for she was sure he never intended any (arm to .an! #oman! or 'hild; and if it was not for that 1loc 0(ead of his own! the .an in some things was well enough; for she had had three 'hildren by him in less than three Aears! and was almost ready to cry out the fourth time.: *he would have proceeded in this manner much longer! had not Peter stopt her %ongue! by telling her he had nothing to say to her (usband! nor her neither. *o! as Adams and the rest had assured her of )orgiveness! she cried and curt+sied out of the Room. .r. Pounce was desirous that -anny should continue her ?ourney with him in the 'hariot! and she absolutely refused! being determined to ride behind !oseph, on a (orse which one of $ady %ooby*s *ervants had equipped him with. 8%his was indeed the same which Adams had left behind him at the Inn! and was by these honest .en who new him! redeemed-9 if any means could be contrived of conveying .r. Adams with them; whose 'ompany Pounce, when he found he had no longer hopes of satisfying his old Appetite with -anny, desired in his Vehicle. *o that all matters being settled to the 'ontent of every one! Adams and Pounce mounting the 'hariot! and -anny being placed on a "illion! which !oseph borrowed of the (ost! they all set forwards for %ooby,1all, where they arrived in a few (ours without any thing remar able happening on the Road! unless it was a curious &ialogue between the "arson and the *teward; which! to use the $anguage of a late Apologist! a "attern to all 1iographers! waits for the 7eader in the ne8t Chapter. '(A". CII. A curious )ialogue which passed between $r. Abraham Adams and $r. Peter Pounce, better worth reading than all the Wor"s of Colley Cibber and many others. %he 'hariot had not proceeded far! before .r. Adams observed it was a very fine &ay. :Ay! and a very fine 'ountry too! answered Pounce.: :I should thin so more! returned Adams, if I had not lately travelled over the )owns, which I ta e to exceed this and all other "rospects in the @niverse.: :A fig for "rospects! answered Pounce, one Acre here is worth ten there; and for my own part! I have no &elight in the "rospect of any $and but my own. :*ir! said Adams, you can indulge yourself with many fine "rospects of that ind. :I than 4od I have a little! replied the other! with which I am content! and envy no .an- I have a little! .r. Adams, with which I do as much good as I can. Adams answered! that Riches without 'harity were nothing worth; for that they were only a 1lessing to him who made them a 1lessing to others.: :Aou and I! said Peter, have different /otions of 'harity. I own! as it is generally used! I do not li e the #ord! nor do I thin it becomes one of us 4entlemen; it is a mean "arson0li e >uality; tho+ I would not infer many "arsons have it neither. :*ir! said Adams, my &efinition of 'harity is a generous &isposition to relieve the &istressed. %here is something in that &efinition! answered Peter, which I li e well enough; it is! as you say! a &isposition < and does not so much consist in the Act as in the &isposition to do it; but alas! .r. Adams, #ho are meant by the &istressed= 1elieve me! the &istresses of .an ind are mostly imaginary! and it would be rather )olly than 4oodness to relieve them.: :*ure! *ir! replied Adams, (unger and %hirst! 'old and /a edness! and

other &istresses which attend the "oor! can never be said to be imaginary Evils.: :(ow can any .an complain of (unger! said Peter, in a 'ountry where such excellent *allads are to be gathered in almost every )ield= or of %hirst! where every River and *tream produces such delicious "otations= And as for 'old and /a edness! they are Evils introduced by $uxury and 'ustom. A .an naturally wants 'lothes no more than a (orse or any other Animal! and there are whole /ations who go without them- but these are things perhaps which you! who do not now the #orld< :Aou will pardon me! *ir! returned Adams; I have read of the #ymnosophists.: :A plague of your !ehosaphats, cried Peter; the greatest )ault in our 'onstitution is the "rovision made for the "oor! except that perhaps made for some others. *ir! I have not an Estate which doth not contribute almost as much again to the "oor as to the $and0%ax! and I do assure you I expect to come myself to the "arish in the end.: %o which Adams giving a dissenting *mile! Peter thus proceeded- :I fancy! .r. Adams, you are one of those who imagine I am a $ump of .oney; for there are many who I fancy believe that not only my "oc ets! but my whole 'lothes! are lined with 1an 01ills; but I assure you! you are all mista en- I am not the .an the #orld esteems me. If I can hold my (ead above #ater! it is all I can. I have in7ured myself by purchasing. I have been too liberal of my .oney. Indeed I fear my (eir will find my Affairs in a worse *ituation than they are reputed to be. AhB he will have reason to wish I had loved .oney more! and $and less. "ray! my good /eighbour! where should I have that >uantity of Riches the #orld is so liberal to bestow on me= #here could I possibly! without I had stole it! acquire such a %reasure.: :#hy truly! says Adams, I have been always of your ,pinion; I have wondered as well as yourself with what 'onfidence they could report such things of you! which have to me appeared as mere Impossibilities; for you now! *ir! and I have often heard you say it! that your #ealth is your own Acquisition! and can it be credible that in your short time you should have amassed such a heap of %reasure as these "eople will have you worth= Indeed had you inherited an Estate li e *ir (homas %ooby, which had descended in your )amily for many 4enerations! they might have had a colour for their Assertions.: :#hy! what do they say I am worth= cries Peter with a malicious *neer. :*ir! answered Adams, I have heard some aver you are not worth less than twenty thousand "ounds. At which Peter frowned. :/ay! *ir! said Adams, you as me only the ,pinion of others! for my own part I have always denied it! nor did I ever believe you could possibly be worth half that *um. :(owever! .r. Adams, said he! squee5ing him by the (and! I would not sell them all I am worth for double that *um; and as to what you believe! or they believe! I care not a )ig! no not a )art. I am not poor because you thin me so! nor because you attempt to undervalue me in the 'ountry. I now the Envy of .an ind very well! but I than (eaven I am above them. It is true my #ealth is of my own Acquisition. I have not an Estate li e *ir (homas %ooby, that has descended in my )amily through many 4enerations; but I now the (eirs of such Estates who are forced to travel about the 'ountry li e some "eople in torn 'assoc s! and might be glad to accept of a pitiful 'uracy for what I now. Aes! *ir! as shabby )ellows as yourself! whom no .an of my )igure! without that Vice of 4ood0nature about him! would suffer to ride in a 'hariot with him. *ir! said Adams, I value not your 'hariot of a Rush; and if I had nown you had intended to affront me! I would have wal ed to the #orld+s End on foot ere I would have accepted a place in it. (owever! *ir! I will soon rid you of that Inconvenience! and so saying! he opened the 'hariot0&oor without calling to the 'oachman! and leapt out into the (ighway! forgetting to ta e his (at along with him; which however .r. Pounce threw after him with great violence. !oseph and -anny stopt to bear him 'ompany the rest of the way! which was not above a .ile. BOO* IV. '(A". I. (he Arrival of Lady %ooby and the rest at %ooby,1all. %he 'oach and *ix! in which $ady %ooby rode! overtoo the other %ravellers as they entered the "arish. *he no sooner saw !oseph, than her 'hee s glow+d with red! and immediately after became as totally pale. *he had in her *urpri5e almost stopt her 'oach; but recollected herself timely enough to prevent it. *he entered the "arish amidst the ringing of 1ells! and the Acclamations of the "oor! who were re7oiced to see their "atroness returned after so long an Absence! during which time all her Rents had been drafted to London, without a *hilling being spent among them! which tended not a little to their utter impoverishing; for if the

'ourt would be severely missed in such a 'ity as London, how much more must the Absence of a "erson of great )ortune be felt in a little 'ountry Village! for whose Inhabitants such a )amily finds a constant Employment and *upply; and with the ,ffalls of whose %able the infirm! aged! and infant "oor are abundantly fed! with a 4enerosity which hath scarce a visible Effect on their 1enefactor+s "oc ets= 1ut if their Interest inspired so public a ?oy into every 'ountenance! how much more forcibly did the Affection which they bore "arson Adams operate upon all who beheld his Return. %hey floc ed about him li e dutiful 'hildren round an indulgent "arent! and vyed with each other in &emonstrations of &uty and $ove. %he "arson on his side shoo every one by the (and! enquired heartily after the (ealths of all that were absent! of their 'hildren and Relations! and exprest a *atisfaction in his )ace! which nothing but 1enevolence made happy by its ,b7ects could infuse. /or did !oseph and -anny want a hearty #elcome from all who saw them. In short! no three "ersons could be more indly received! as indeed none ever more deserved to be universally beloved. A)A$' carried his )ellow0%ravellers home to his (ouse! where he insisted on their parta ing whatever his #ife! whom with his 'hildren he found in (ealth and ?oy! could provide. #here we shall leave them! en7oying perfect (appiness over a homely .eal! to view *cenes of greater *plendor but infinitely less 1liss. ,ur more intelligent Readers will doubtless suspect by this second Appearance of $ady %ooby on the *tage! that all was not ended by the &ismission of !oseph; and to be honest with them! they are in the right; the Arrow had pierced deeper than she imagined; nor was the #ound so easily to be cured. %he Removal of the ,b7ect soon cooled her Rage! but it had a different Effect on her $ove; that departed with his "erson; but this remained lur ing in her .ind with his Image. Restless! interrupted *lumbers! and confused horrible &reams were her "ortion the first /ight. In the .orning! )ancy painted her a more delicious *cene; but to delude! not delight her- for before she could reach the promised (appiness! it vanished! and left her to curse! not bless the Vision. *he started from her *leep! her Imagination being all on fire with the "hantom! when her Eyes accidentally glancing towards the *pot where yesterday the real !oseph had stood! that little 'ircumstance raised his Idea in the liveliest 'olours in her .emory. Each $oo ! each #ord! each 4esture rushed bac on her .ind with 'harms which all his 'oldness could not abate. /ay! she imputed that to his Aouth! his )olly! his Awe! his Religion! to every thing! but what would instantly have produced 'ontempt! want of "assion for the *ex; or! that which would have roused her (atred! want of $i ing to her. Reflection then hurried her farther! and told her she must see this beautiful Aouth no more! nay! suggested to her! that she herself had dismissed him for no other )ault! than probably that of too violent an Awe and Respect for herself; and which she ought rather to have esteemed a .erit! the Effects of which were besides so easily and surely to have been removed; she then blamed! she cursed the hasty Rashness of her %emper; her )ury was vented all on herself! and !oseph appeared innocent in her Eyes. (er "assion at length grew so violent that it forced her on see ing Relief! and now she thought of recalling him- 1ut "ride forbad that! "ride which soon drove all softer "assions from her *oul! and represented to her the .eanness of him she was fond of. %hat %hought soon began to obscure his 1eauties; 'ontempt succeeded next! and then &isdain! which presently introduced her (atred of the 'reature who had given her so much @neasiness. %hese Enemies of !oseph had no sooner ta en "ossession of her .ind! than they insinuated to her a thousand things in his &isfavour; every thing but &isli e of her "erson; a %hought! which as it would have been intolerable to her! she chec ed the moment it endeavoured to arise. Revenge came now to her Assistance; and she considered her &ismission of him stript! and without a 'haracter! with the utmost "leasure. *he rioted in the several inds of .isery! which her Imagination suggested to her! might be his )ate; and with a *mile composed of Anger! .irth! and *corn! viewed him in the Rags in which her )ancy had drest him. .rs. 'lipslop being summoned! attended her .istress! who had now in her own ,pinion totally subdued this "assion. #hilst she was dressing! she as ed if that )ellow had been turned away according to her ,rders. 'lipslop answered! she had told her $adyship so! 8as indeed she had9 <:And how did he behave=: replied the $ady. :%ruly .adam!: cries 'lipslop, :in such a manner that infected every body who saw him. %he poor $ad had but little #ages to receive- for he constantly allowed his )ather and .other half his Income; so that when your $adyship+s $ivery was stript off! he had not wherewithal to buy a 'oat! and must have gone na ed! if one of the )ootmen had not incommodated him with one; and whilst he was standing in his *hirt!

8and to say truth! he was a lovely )igure9 being told your $adyship would not give him a 'haracter! he sighed! and said he had done nothing willingly to offend; that for his part he should always give your $adyship a good 'haracter where0ever he went; and he pray+d 4od to bless you; for you was the best of $adies! tho+ his Enemies had set you against him- I wish you had not turned him away; for I believe you have not a faithfuller *ervant in the (ouse.: <:(ow came you then!: replied the $ady! :to advise me to turn him away=: :I! .adam!: said 'lipslop, :I am sure you will do me the ?ustice to say! I did all in my power to prevent it; but I saw your $adyship was angry; and it is not the business of us upper *ervants to hintorfear on those occasions.: <:And was it not you! audacious #retch!: cried the $ady! :who made me angry= #as it not your %ittle0tattle! in which I believe you belyed the poor )ellow! which incensed me against him= (e may than you for all that hath happened; and so may I for the $oss of a good *ervant! and one who probably had more .erit than all of you. "oor )ellowB I am charmed with his 4oodness to his "arents. #hy did not you tell me of that! but suffer me to dismiss so good a 'reature without a 'haracter= I see the Reason of your whole 1ehaviour now as well as your 'omplaint; you was 7ealous of the #enches.: :I 7ealousB: said 'lipslop, :I assure you I loo upon myself as his 1etters; I am not .eat for a )ootman I hope.: %hese #ords threw the $ady into a violent "assion! and she sent 'lipslop from her "resence! who departed tossing her /ose and crying! :.arry come upB there are some "eople more 7ealous than I! I believe.: (er $ady affected not to hear the #ords! tho+ in reality she did! and understood them too. /ow ensued a second 'onflict! so li e the former! that it might savour of Repetition to relate it minutely. It may suffice to say! that $ady %ooby found good Reason to doubt whether she had so absolutely conquered her "assion! as she had flattered herself; and in order to accomplish it quite! too a Resolution more common than wise! to retire immediately into the 'ountry. %he Reader hath long ago seen the Arrival of .rs. 'lipslop, whom no "ertness could ma e her .istress resolve to part with; lately! that of .r. Pounce her )ore0runners; and lastly! that of the $ady herself. %he .orning after her Arrival being 'unday, she went to 'hurch! to the great *urpri5e of every body! who wondered to see her $adyship! being no very constant 'hurchwoman! there so suddenly upon her ?ourney. !oseph was li ewise there; and I have heard it was remar ed! that she fixed her Eyes on him much more than on the "arson; but this I believe to be only a malicious Rumour. #hen the "rayers were ended .r. Adams stood up! and with a loud Voice pronounced- . publish the %anns of $arriage between ?oseph Andrews and )rances 4oodwill! both of this Parish, Ec. #hether this had any Effect on $ady %ooby or no! who was then in her "ew! which the 'ongregation could not see into! I could never discover- 1ut certain it is! that in about a quarter of an (our she stood up! and directed her Eyes to that part of the 'hurch where the #omen sat! and persisted in loo ing that way during the Remainder of the *ermon! in so scrutini5ing a manner! and with so angry a 'ountenance! that most of the #omen were afraid she was offended at them. %he moment she returned home! she sent for 'lipslop into her 'hamber! and told her! she wondered what that impudent )ellow !oseph did in that "arish= @pon which 'lipslop gave her an Account of her meeting Adams with him on the Road! and li ewise the Adventure with -anny. At the Relation of which! the $ady often changed her 'ountenance; and when she had heard all! she ordered .r. Adams into her "resence! to whom she behaved as the Reader will see in the next 'hapter. '(A". II. A )ialogue between $r. Abraham Adams and the Lady %ooby. .r. Adams was not far off; for he was drin ing her $adyship+s (ealth below in a 'up of her Ale. (e no sooner came before her! than she began in the following manner- :I wonder! *ir! after the many great ,bligations you have had to this )amily!: 8with all which the Reader hath! in the 'ourse of this (istory! been minutely acquainted9 :that you will ungratefully show any Respect to a )ellow who hath been turned out of it for his .isdeeds. /or is it! I can tell you! *ir! becoming in a .an of your 'haracter! to run about the 'ountry with an idle )ellow and #ench. Indeed! as for the 4irl! I now no harm of her. 'lipslop tells me she was formerly bred up in my (ouse! and behaved as she ought! till she han ered after this )ellow! and he spoiled her. /ay! she may still perhaps do very well! if he will let her alone. Aou are therefore doing a monstrous thing! in endeavouring to procure a .atch between these two "eople! which will be to the Ruin of them

both.:<:.adam!: says Adams, :if your $adyship will but hear me spea ! I protest I never heard any harm of .r. !oseph Andrews; if I had! I should have corrected him for it- )or I never have! nor will encourage the )aults of those under my 'ure. As for the young #oman! I assure your $adyship I have as good an ,pinion of her as your $adyship yourself! or any other can have. *he is the sweetest0tempered! honestest! worthiest! young 'reature; indeed as to her 1eauty! I do not commend her on that account! tho+ all .en allow she is the handsomest #oman! 4entle or *imple! that ever appeared in the "arish.: :Aou are very impertinent! says she! to tal such fulsome *tuff to me. It is mighty becoming truly in a 'lergyman to trouble himself about handsome #omen! and you are a delicate ?udge of 1eauty! no doubt. A .an who hath lived all his $ife in such a "arish as this! is a rare ?udge of 1eauty. RidiculousB 1eauty indeed! <a 'ountry #ench a 1eauty. <I shall be sic whenever I hear 1eauty mentioned again. < And so this #ench is to stoc the "arish with 1eauties! I hope. <1ut! *ir! our "oor is numerous enough already; I will have no more Vagabonds settled here.: :.adam!: says Adams, :your $adyship is offended with me! I protest without any Reason. %his 'ouple were desirous to consummate long ago! and I dissuaded them from it; nay! I may venture to say! I believe! I was the sole 'ause of their delaying it.: :#ell!: says she! and you did very wisely and honestly too! notwithstanding she is the greatest 1eauty in the "arish.: <:And now! .adam!: continued he! :I only perform my ,ffice to .r. !oseph.: <:"ray don+t .ister such )ellows to me!: cries the $ady. :(e!: said the "arson! :with the 'onsent of -anny, before my )ace! put in the 1anns.: <:Aes!: answered the $ady! :I suppose the *lut is forward enough; 'lipslop tells me how her (ead runs on )ellows; that is one of her 1eauties! I suppose. 1ut if they have put in the 1anns! I desire you will publish them no more without my ,rders.: :.adam!: cries Adams, :if any one puts in sufficient 'aution! and assigns a proper Reason against them! I am willing to surcease.: <:I tell you a Reason!: says she! :he is a Vagabond! and he shall not settle here! and bring a /est of 1eggars into the "arish; it will ma e us but little Amends that they will be 1eauties.: :.adam!: answered Adams, :with the utmost *ubmission to your $adyship! I have been informed by $awyer 'cout, that any "erson who serves a Aear! gains a *ettlement in the "arish where he serves.: :$awyer 'cout,: replied the $ady! :is an impudent 'oxcomb; I will have no $awyer 'nout interfere with me. I repeat to you again! I will have no more Incumbrances brought on us; so I desire you will proceed no further.: :.adam!: returned Adams, :I would obey your $adyship in every thing that is lawful; but surely the "arties being poor is no Reason against their marrying. 4<d forbid there should be any such $aw. %he "oor have little *hare enough of this #orld already; it would be barbarous indeed to deny them the common "rivileges! and innocent En7oyments which /ature indulges to the animal 'reation.: :*ince you understand yourself no better!: cries the $ady! :nor the Respect due from such as you to a #oman of my &istinction! than to affront my Ears by such loose &iscourse! I shall mention but one short #ord; It is my ,rders to you! that you publish these 1anns no more; and if you dare! I will recommend it to your .aster! the &octor! to discard you from his *ervice. I will! *ir! notwithstanding your poor )amily; and then you and the greatest 1eauty in the "arish may go and beg together.: :.adam!: answered Adams, :I now not what your $adyship means by the %erms $aster and 'ervice. I am in the *ervice of a .aster who will never discard me for doing my &uty- And if the &octor 8for indeed I have never been able to pay for a $icence9 thin s proper to turn me from my 'ure! 4< will provide me! I hope! another. At least! my )amily as well as myself have (ands; and he will prosper! I doubt not! our Endeavours to get our 1read honestly with them. #hilst my 'onscience is pure! I shall never fear what .an can do unto me.: < :I condemn my (umility!: said the $ady! :for demeaning myself to converse with you so long. I shall ta e other .easures; for I see you are a 'onfederate with them. 1ut the sooner you leave me! the better; and I shall give ,rders that my &oors may no longer be open to you.: :.adam!: said Adams, :I shall enter into no "erson+s &oors against their #ill- 1ut I am assured! when you have enquired farther into this matter! you will applaud! not blame my "roceeding; and so I humbly ta e my leave;: which he did with many 1ows! or at least many Attempts at a 1ow. '(A". III. What past between the Lady and Lawyer 'cout. In the Afternoon the $ady sent for .r. 'cout, whom she attac ed most violently for intermeddling with her *ervants! which he denied! and indeed with %ruth; for he had only asserted accidentally! and perhaps rightly!

that a Aear+s *ervice gained a *ettlement; and so far he owned he might have formerly informed the "arson! and believed it was $aw. :I am resolved!: said the $ady! :to have no discarded *ervants of mine settled here; and so! if this be your $aw! I shall send to another $awyer.: 'cout said! :If she sent to a hundred $awyers! not one nor all of them could alter the $aw. %he utmost that was in the power of a $awyer! was to prevent the $aw+s ta ing effect; and that he himself could do for her $adyship as well as any other- And I believe!: says he! :.adam! your $adyship not being conversant in these .atters hath mista en a &ifference- )or I asserted only! that a .an who served a Aear was settled. /ow there is a material &ifference between being settled in $aw and settled in )act; and as I affirmed generally he was settled! and $aw is preferable to )act! my *ettlement must be understood in $aw! and not in )actB And suppose! .adam! we admit he was settled in $aw! what use will they ma e of it! how doth that relate to )act= (e is not settled in )act; and if he be not settled in )act! he is not an Inhabitant; and if he is not an Inhabitant! he is not of this "arish; and then undoubtedly he ought not to be published here; for .r. Adams hath told me your $adyship+s "leasure! and the Reason! which is a very good one! to prevent burdening us with the "oor! we have too many already; and I thin we ought to have an Act to hang or transport half of them.: :%ruly!: said the $ady! :they are a grievous $oad! and unless we had an Employment for them! it would be 'harity to send them where they might have something to do. At least! I am sure we ought to prevent the farther 4rowth of the Evil! and not let such 1eauties as these produce 'hildren for us to eep.: <:1eauties indeedB your $adyship is pleased to be merry!:< answered 'cout . <:.r. Adams described her so to me! said the $ady. <"ray what sort of &owdy is it! .r. 'cout=: <:%he ugliest 'reature almost I ever beheld! a poor dirty &rab! your $adyship never saw such a #retch.: <:#ell but! dear .r. 'cout, let her be what she will! <these ugly #omen will bring 'hildren you now; so that we must prevent the .arriage.: <:%rue! .adam!: replied 'cout, :for the subsequent .arriage co0operating with the $aw! will carry $aw into )act. #hen a .an is married! he is settled in )act; and then he is not removeable. I will see .r. Adams, and I ma e no doubt of prevailing with him. (is only ,b7ection is doubtless that he shall lose his )ee- 1ut that being once made easy! as it shall be! I am confident no farther ,b7ection will remain. /o! no! it is impossible- but your $adyship can+t discommend his @nwillingness to depart with his )ee. Every .an ought to have a proper Value for his )ee. As to the matter in question! if your $adyship pleases to employ me in it! I will venture to promise you *uccess. %he $aws of this $and are not so vulgar! to permit a mean )ellow to contend with one of your $adyship+s )ortune. #e have one sure 'ard! which is to carry him before ?ustice (rolic", who! upon hearing your $adyship+s /ame! will commit him without any farther >uestions.: < :%a e what .easures you please! good .r. 'cout,: answered the $ady! :but I wish you could rid the "arish of both; for 'lipslop tells me such *tories of this #ench! that I abhor the %houghts of her; and tho+ you say she is such an ugly *lut! yet you now! dear .r. 'cout, these forward 'reatures who run after .en! will always find some as forward as themselves- *o that! to prevent the Increase of 1eggars! we must get rid of her.: <:Aour $adyship is very much in the right!: answered 'cout, :but I am afraid the $aw is a little deficient in giving us any such "ower of "revention; however the ?ustice will stretch it as far as he is able! to oblige your $adyship. %o say truth! it is a great 1lessing to the 'ountry that he is in the 'ommission; for he hath ta en several "oor off our hands! that the $aw would never lay hold on. I now some ?ustices who ma e as much of committing a .an to %ridewell as his $ordship at 'i2e would of hanging him- 1ut it would do a .an good to see his #orship our ?ustice commit a )ellow to %ridewell; he ta es so much pleasure in it- And when once we ha+ un there! we seldom hear any more o+ un. (e+s either starved or eat up by Vermin in a .onth+s time.: <(ere the Arrival of a Visitor put an end to the 'onversation! and .r. 'cout having underta en the 'ause! and promised it *uccess! departed. %his 'cout was one of those )ellows! who without any 2nowledge of the $aw! or being bred to it! ta e upon them! in defiance of an Act of "arliament! to act as $awyers in the 'ountry! and are called so. %hey are the "ests of *ociety! and a *candal to a "rofession! to which indeed they do not belong; and which owes to such ind of Rascallions the Ill0will which wea "ersons bear towards it. #ith this )ellow! to whom a little before she would not have condescended to have spo en! did a certain "assion for !oseph, and the ?ealousy and &isdain of poor innocent -anny, betray the $ady %ooby, into a familiar &iscourse! in which she inadvertently confirmed many (ints! with which 'lipslop, whose 4allant he was! had pre0acquainted him; and whence he

had ta en an ,pportunity to assert those severe )alshoods of little -anny, which possibly the Reader might not have been well able to account for! if we had not thought proper to give him this Information. '(A". IV. A short Chapter, but very full of $atter; particularly the Arrival of $r. %ooby and his Lady. All that /ight and the next &ay! the $ady %ooby past with the utmost Anxiety; her .ind was distracted! and her *oul tossed up and down by many turbulent and opposite "assions. *he loved! hated! pitied! scorned! admired! despised the same "erson by )its! which changed in a very short Interval. ,n (uesday .orning! which happened to be a (oliday! she went to 'hurch! where! to her surpri5e! .r. Adams published the 1anns again with as audible a Voice as before. It was luc y for her! that as there was no *ermon! she had an immediate ,pportunity of returning home! to vent her Rage! which she could not have concealed from the 'ongregation five .inutes; indeed it was not then very numerous! the Assembly consisting of no more than Adams, his 'ler ! his #ife! the $ady! and one of her *ervants. At her Return she met 'lipslop, who accosted her in these #ords- <:, .eam! what doth your $adyship thin = %o be sure $awyer 'cout hath carried !oseph and -anny both before the ?ustice. All the "arish are in %ears! and say they will certainly be hanged)or no body nows what it is for.: <:I suppose they deserve it!: says the $ady. :#hat dost thou mention such #retches to me=: <:, dear .adam! answer+d 'lipslop, is it not a pity such a graceless young .an should die a virulent &eath= I hope the ?udge will ta e Commensuration on his Aouth. As for -anny, I don+t thin it signifies much what becomes of her; and if poor !oseph hath done any thing! I could venture to swear she traduced him to it- )ew .en ever come to fragrant "unishment! but by those nasty 'reatures who are a *candal to our 'ect.: %he $ady was no more pleased at this /ews! after a moment+s Reflection! than 'lipslop herself- )or tho+ she wished -anny far enough! she did not desire the Removal of !oseph, especially with her. *he was pu55led how to act! or what to say on this ,ccasion! when a 'oach and six drove into the 'ourt! and a *ervant acquainted her with the Arrival of her /ephew %ooby and his $ady. *he ordered them to be conducted into a &rawing0Room! whither she presently repaired! having composed her 'ountenance as well as she could; and being a little satisfied that the #edding would by these means be at least interrupted; and that she should have an ,pportunity to execute any Resolution she might ta e! for which she saw herself provided with an excellent Instrument in 'cout. %he $ady %ooby apprehended her *ervant had made a .ista e! when he had mentioned .r. %ooby*s $ady; for she had never heard of his .arriage- but how great was her *urpri5e! when at her entering the Room! her /ephew presented his #ife to her! saying! :.adam! this is that charming Pamela, of whom I am convinced you have heard so much.: %he $ady received her with more 'ivility than he expected; indeed with the utmost- )or she was perfectly polite! nor had any Vice inconsistent with 4ood0breeding. %hey past some little time in ordinary &iscourse! when a *ervant came and whispered .r. %ooby, who presently told the $adies he must desert them a little on some 1usiness of 'onsequence; and as their &iscourse during his Absence would afford little Improvement or Entertainment to the Reader! we will leave them for a while to attend .r. %ooby. '(A". V. Containing !ustice %usiness; Curious Precedents of )epositions, and other $atters necessary to be perused by all !ustices of the Peace and their Cler"s. %he young *quire and his $ady were no sooner alighted from their 'oach! than the *ervants began to enquire after .r. !oseph, from whom they said their $ady had not heard a #ord to her great *urpri5e! since he had left $ady %ooby*s. @pon this they were instantly informed of what had lately happened! with which they hastily acquainted their .aster! who too an immediate Resolution to go himself! and endeavour to restore his Pamela her 1rother! before she even new she had lost him. %he ?ustice! before whom the 'riminals were carried! and who lived within a short .ile of the $ady+s (ouse! was luc ily .r. %ooby*s Acquaintance! by his having an Estate in his /eighbourhood. ,rdering therefore his (orses to his 'oach! he set out for the ?udgment0*eat! and arriv+d when the ?ustice had almost finished his

1usiness. (e was conducted into a (all! where he was acquainted that his #orship would wait on him in a moment; for he had only a .an and #oman to commit to %ridewell first. As he was now convinced he had not a .inute to lose! he insisted on the *ervants introducing him directly to the Room where the ?ustice then was executing his ,ffice! as he called it. 1eing brought thither! and the first 'ompliments being past between the *quire and his #orship! the former as ed the latter what 'rime those two young "eople had been guilty of. :/o great 'rime!: answered the ?ustice. :I have only ordered them to %ridewell for a .onth.: :1ut what is their 'rime=: repeated the *quire. :$arceny! an+t please your (onour!: said 'cout. :Ay!: says the ?ustice! :a ind of felonious larcenous thing. I believe I must order them a little 'orrection too! a little *tripping and #hipping.: 8"oor -anny, who had hitherto supported all with the %houghts of her !oseph*s 'ompany! trembled at that *ound; but indeed without reason! for none but the &evil himself would have executed such a *entence on her.9 :*till!: said the *quire! :I am ignorant of the 'rime! the )act I mean.: :#hy! there it is in "eaper!: answered the ?ustice! shewing him a &eposition! which in the Absence of his 'ler he had writ himself! of which we have with great difficulty procured an authentic 'opy; and here it follows verbatim et literatim. (he )epusition of !ames 'cout, Layer, and (homas (rotter, 4eoman, ta"en befor mee, on of his $agesty*s !ustasses of the Piece for >umersetshire. :%hese &eponants saith! and first (homas (rotter for himself saith! that on the < of this instant October, being *abbath0&ay! betwin the ,urs of F and G in the afternoon! he 5eed !oseph Andrews and -rancis #oodwill wal a ross a certane )elde belunging to $ayer 'cout, and out of the "ath which ledes thru the said )elde! and there he 5ede !oseph Andrews with a /ife cut one (assel0%wig! of the value! as he believes! of N half pence! or thereabouts; and he saith! that the said -rancis #oodwill was li ewise wal ing on the 4rass out of the said "ath in the said )elde! and did receive and arry in her (and the said %wig! and so was cumfarting! eading and abatting to the said !oseph therein. And the said !ames 'cout for himself says! that he verily believes the said %wig to be his own proper %wig! Ec.: :?esuB: said the *quire! :would you commit two "ersons to %ridewell for a %wig=: :Aes!: said the $awyer! :and with great $enity too; for if we had called it a young %ree they would have been both hanged.: < :(ar ee!: 8says the ?ustice! ta ing aside the *quire9 :I should not have been so severe on this ,ccasion! but $ady %ooby desires to get them out of the "arish; so $awyer 'cout will give the 'onstable ,rders to let them run away! if they please; but it seems they intend to marry together! and the $ady hath no other means! as they are legally settled there! to prevent their bringing an Incumbrance on her own "arish.: :#ell!: said the *quire! :I will ta e care my Aunt shall be satisfied in this "oint; and li ewise I promise you! !oseph here shall never be any Incumbrance on her. I shall be oblig+d to you therefore! if! instead of %ridewell, you will commit them to my 'ustody.: <:, to be sure! *ir! if you desire it!: answer+d the ?ustice; and without more ado! !oseph and -anny were delivered over to *quire %ooby, whom !oseph very well new; but little ghest how nearly he was related to him. %he ?ustice burnt his .ittimus. %he 'onstable was sent about his 1usiness. %he $awyer made no 'omplaint for want of ?ustice! and the "risoners! with exulting (earts; gave a thousand %han s to his (onour .r. %ooby, who did not intend their ,bligations to him should cease here; for ordering his .an to produce a 'loa bag which he had caused to be brought from $ady %ooby*s on purpose! he desired the ?ustice that he might have !oseph with him into a Room; where ordering his *ervant to ta e out a *uit of his own 'lothes! with $innen and other /ecessaries! he left !oseph to dress himself! who not yet nowing the 'ause of all this 'ivility! excused his accepting such a )avour! as long as decently he could. #hilst !oseph was dressing! the *quire repaired to the ?ustice! whom he found tal ing with -anny; for during the Examination she had lopped her (at over her Eyes! which were also bathed in %ears! and had by that means concealed from his #orship what might perhaps have rendered the Arrival of .r. %ooby unnecessary! at least for herself. %he ?ustice no sooner saw her 'ountenance cleared up! and her bright Eyes shining through her %ears! than he secretly cursed himself for having once thought of %ridewell for her. (e would willingly have sent his own #ife thither! to have had -anny in her place. And conceiving almost at the same instant &esires and *chemes to accomplish them! he employed the .inutes whilst the *quire was absent with !oseph, in assuring her how sorry he was for having treated her so roughly before he new her .erit; and told her! that since $ady %ooby was unwilling that she should settle in her "arish! she was heartily welcome to his! where he promised her his "rotection! adding! that he would ta e !oseph and her into his own )amily!

if she li ed it; which Assurance he confirmed with a *quee5e by the (and. *he than ed him very indly! and said! :she would acquaint !oseph with the ,ffer! which he would certainly be glad to accept; for that $ady %ooby was angry with them both; tho+ she did not now either had done any thing to offend her- but imputed it to .adam 'lipslop, who had always been her Enemy.: %he *quire now returned! and prevented any farther 'ontinuance of this 'onversation; and the ?ustice out of a pretended Respect to his 4uest! but in reality from an Apprehension of a Rival; 8for he new nothing of his .arriage!9 ordered -anny into the 2itchin! whither she gladly retired; nor did the *quire! who declined the %rouble of explaining the whole matter! oppose it. It would be unnecessary! if I was able! which indeed I am not! to relate the 'onversation between these two 4entlemen! which rolled! as I have been informed! entirely on the *ub7ect of (orse0racing. !oseph was soon drest in the plainest &ress he could find! which was a blue 'oat and 1reeches! with a 4old Edging! and a red #aistcoat with the same; and as this *uit! which was rather too large for the *quire! exactly fitted him; so he became it so well! and loo ed so genteel! that no "erson would have doubted its being as well adapted to his >uality as his *hape; nor have suspected! as one might when my $ord <! or *ir <! or .r. < appear in $ace or Embroidery! that the %aylor+s .an wore those 'lothes home on his 1ac ! which he should have carried under his Arm. %he *quire now too leave of the ?ustice! and calling for -anny, made her and !oseph, against their #ills! get into the 'oach with him! which he then ordered to drive to $ady %ooby*s. <It had moved a few Aards only! when the *quire as ed !oseph, if he new who that .an was crossing the )ield; for! added he! I never saw one ta e such *trides before. !oseph answered eagerly! :, *ir! it is "arson Adams.: <:, la! indeed! and so it is!: said -anny; :poor .an he is coming to do what he could for us. #ell! he is the worthiest best natur+d 'reature.: < :Ay!: said !oseph, :4od bless him; for there is not such another in the @niverse.: <:%he best 'reature living sure!: cries -anny. :Is he=: says the *quire! :then I am resolved to have the best 'reature living in my 'oach!: and so saying he ordered it to stop! whilst !oseph at his Request hollowed to the "arson! who well nowing his Voice! made all the haste imaginable! and soon came up with them; he was desired by the .aster! who could scarce refrain from $aughter at his )igure! to mount into the 'oach! which he with many %han s refused! saying he could wal by its side! and he+d warrant he ept with it; but he was at length over0prevailed on. %he *quire now acquainted !oseph with his .arriage; but he might have spared himself that $abour; for his *ervant! whilst !oseph was dressing! had performed that ,ffice before. (e continued to express the vast (appiness he en7oyed in his *ister! and the Value he had for all who belonged to her. !oseph made many 1ows! and exprest as many Ac nowledgments; and "arson Adams, who now first perceived !oseph*s new Apparel! burst into %ears with ?oy! and fell to rubbing his (ands and snapping his )ingers! as if he had been mad. %hey were now arrived at the $ady %ooby*s, and the *quire desiring them to wait a moment in the 'ourt! wal ed in to his Aunt! and calling her out from his #ife! acquainted her with !oseph*s Arrival; saying! :.adam! as I have married a virtuous and worthy #oman! I am resolved to shew a proper Respect! and own her Relations! and I shall thin myself infinitely obliged to all mine! who will do the same. It is true! her 1rother hath been your *ervant; but he is now become my 1rother; and I have one (appiness! that neither his 'haracter! his 1ehaviour or Appearance give me any reason to be ashamed of calling him so. In short! he is now below! drest li e a 4entleman! in which $ight I intend he shall hereafter be seen; and you will oblige me beyond Expression! if you will admit him to be of our "arty; for I now it will give great "leasure to my #ife! tho+ she will not mention it.: %his was a stro e of )ortune beyond the $ady %ooby*s (opes or Expectation; she answered him eagerly! :/ephew! you now how easily I am prevailed on to do any thing which !oseph Andrews desires<"hoo! I mean which you desire me! and as he is now your Relation! I cannot refuse to entertain him as such.: %he *quire told her! he new his ,bligation to her for her 'ompliance! and going three *teps! returned and told her<he had one more )avour! which he believed she would easily grant! as she had accorded him the former. :%here is a young #oman: <:/ephew!: says she! :don+t let my 4ood0nature ma e you desire! as is too commonly the 'ase! to impose on me. /or thin ! because I have with so much 'ondescension agreed to suffer your 1rother0in0law to come to my %able! that I will submit to the 'ompany of all my own *ervants! and all the dirty %rollops in the 'ountry.: :.adam!: answer+d the *quire! :I believe you never saw this

young 'reature. I never beheld such *weetness and Innocence 7oined with such 1eauty! and withal so genteel.: :@pon my *oul! I won+t admit her!: reply+d the $ady in a "assion; :the whole #orld shan+t prevail on me! I resent even the &esire as an Affront! and<%he *quire! who new her Inflexibility! interrupted her! by as ing "ardon! and promising not to mention it more. (e then returned to !oseph, and she to Pamela. (e too !oseph aside and told him! he would carry him to his *ister; but could not prevail as yet for -anny. !oseph begged that he might see his *ister alone! and then be with his -anny; but the *quire nowing the "leasure his #ife would have in her 1rother+s 'ompany! would not admit it! telling !oseph there would be nothing in so short an Absence from -anny, whilst he was assured of her *afety; adding! he hoped he could not so easily quit a *ister whom he had not seen so long! and who so tenderly loved him< !oseph immediately complied; for indeed no 1rother could love a *ister more; and recommending -anny, who re7oiced that she was not to go before $ady %ooby, to the 'are of .r. Adams, he attended the *quire up stairs! whilst -anny repaired with the "arson to his (ouse! where she was certain of a ind Reception.: '(A". VI. Of which you are desired to read no more than you li"e. %he .eeting between !oseph and Pamela was not without %ears of ?oy on both sides; and their Embraces were full of %enderness and Affection. %hey were however regarded with much more "leasure by the /ephew than by the Aunt! to whose )lame they were )ewel only; and being assisted by the Addition of &ress! which was indeed not wanted to set off the lively 'olours in which /ature had drawn (ealth! *trength! 'omeliness! and Aouth. In the Afternoon !oseph, at their Request! entertained them with an Account of his Adventures! nor could $ady %ooby conceal her &issatisfaction at those "arts in which -anny was concerned! especially when .r. %ooby launched forth into such rapturous "raises of her 1eauty. *he said! applying to her /iece! that she wondered her /ephew! who had pretended to marry for $ove! should thin such a *ub7ect proper to amuse his #ife with- adding! that for her part! she should be 7ealous of a (usband who spo e so warmly in praise of another #oman. Pamela answer+d! indeed she thought she had cause; but it was an Instance of .r. %ooby*s aptness to see more 1eauty in #omen than they were .istresses of. At which #ords both the #omen fixed their Eyes on two $oo ing04lasses; and $ady %ooby replied that .en were in the general very ill ?udges of 1eauty; and then whilst both contemplated only their own )aces! they paid a cross 'ompliment to each other+s 'harms. #hen the (our of Rest approached! which the $ady of the (ouse deferred as long as decently she could! she informed !oseph 8whom for the future we shall call .r. !oseph, he having as good a %itle to that Appellation as many others! I mean that incontested one of good 'lothes9 that she had ordered a 1ed to be provided for him! he declined this )avour to his utmost; for his (eart had long been with his -anny; but she insisted on his accepting it! alledging that the "arish had no proper Accommodation for such a "erson! as he was now to esteem himself. %he *quire and his $ady both 7oining with her! .r. !oseph was at last forced to give over his &esign of visiting -anny that Evening! who on her side as impatiently expected him till .idnight! when in complacence to .r. Adams*s )amily! who had sat up two (ours out of Respect to her! she retired to 1ed! but not to sleep; the %houghts of her $ove ept her wa ing! and his not returning according to his "romise! filled her with @neasiness; of which however she could not assign any other 'ause than merely that of being absent from him. .r. !oseph however rose early in the .orning! and visited her in whom his *oul delighted. *he no sooner heard his Voice in the "arson+s "arlour! than she leapt from her 1ed! and dressing herself in a few .inutes! went down to him. %hey past two (ours with inexpressible (appiness together! and then having appointed $onday, by .r. Adams*s permission! for their .arriage! .r. !oseph returned according to his "romise! to 1rea fast at the $ady %ooby*s, with whose 1ehaviour since the Evening we shall now acquaint the Reader. *he was no sooner retired to her 'hamber than she as ed 'lipslop what she thought of this wonderful 'reature her /ephew had married. :.adamB: said 'lipslop, not yet sufficiently understanding what Answer she was to ma e. :I as you!: answer+d the $ady! :what you thin of the &owdy! my /iece I thin I am to call her=: 'lipslop, wanting no further (int! began to pull her to pieces! and so miserably defaced her! that it would have been impossible for any one to have nown the "erson. %he $ady gave her all the Assistance she could! and ended with saying<:I thin ! 'lipslop, you have done her ?ustice; but yet! bad as she is! she is an

Angel compared to this -anny.: 'lipslop then fell on -anny, whom she hac +d and hew+d in the li e barbarous manner! concluding with an ,bservation that there was always something in those low0life 'reatures which must eternally distinguish them from their 1etters. :Really!: said the $ady! :I thin there is one Exception to your Rule! I am certain you must ghess who I mean:<:/ot I! upon my word! .adam!: said 'lipslop<:I mean a young )ellow; sure you are the dullest #retch!: said the $ady<:, la! I am indeed <Aes truly! .adam! he is an Accession,: answer+d 'lipslop< :Ay! is he not! 'lipslop=: returned the $ady. :Is he not so genteel that a "rince might without a 1lush ac nowledge him for his *on. (is 1ehaviour is such that would not shame the best Education. (e borrows from his *tation a 'ondescension in every thing to his *uperiours! yet unattended by that mean *ervility which is called 4ood01ehaviour in such "ersons. Every thing he doth hath no mar of the base .otive of )ear! but visibly shews some Respect and 4ratitude! and carries with it the "ersuasion of $ove<And then for his Virtues; such "iety to his "arents! such tender Affection to his *ister! such Integrity in his )riendship! such 1ravery! such 4oodness! that if he had been born a 4entleman! his #ife would have possest the most invaluable 1lessing.: <:%o be sure! .a+am!: says 'lipslop. <:1ut as he is!: answered the $ady! :if he had a thousand more good >ualities! it must render a #oman of )ashion contemptible even to be suspected of thin ing of him! yes I should despise myself for such a %hought.: :%o be sure! .a+am!: said 'lipslop. :And why to be sure=: reply+d the $ady! :thou art always one+s Echo. Is he not more worthy of Affection than a dirty 'ountry 'lown! tho he+s born of a )amily as old as the )lood! or an idle worthless Ra e! or little puisny 1eau of >uality= And yet these we must condemn ourselves to! in order to avoid the 'ensure of the #orld; to shun the 'ontempt of others! we must ally ourselves to those we despise; we must prefer 1irth! %itle and )ortune to real .erit. It is a %yranny of 'ustom! a %yranny we must comply with- )or we "eople of )ashion are the *laves of 'ustom.: <:.arry come upB: said 'lipslop, who now well new which "arty to ta e! :if I was a #oman of your $adyship+s )ortune and >uality! I would be a *lave to no body.: < :.e!: said the $ady! :I am spea ing! if a young #oman of )ashion who had seen nothing in the #orld should happen to li e such a )ellow. <.e indeed; I hope thou dost not imagine.: <:/o! .a+am! to be sure!: cried 'lipslop. <:/oB what no=: cried the $ady. :%hou art always ready to answer! before thou hast heard one. *o far I must allow he is a charming )ellow. .e indeedB /o! 'lipslop, all %houghts of .en are over with me. <I have lost a (usband! who<but if I should reflect! I should run mad. <.y future Ease must depend upon )orgetfulness. 'lipslop, let me hear some of thy /onsense to turn my %houghts another way. #hat dost thou thin of .r. Andrews=: :#hy I thin !: says 'lipslop, :he is the handsomest most properest .an I ever saw; and if I was a $ady of the greatest &egree! it would be well for some )ol s. Aour $adyship may tal of 'ustom if you please; but I am confidous there is no more 'omparison between young .r. Andrews, and most of the young 4entlemen who come to your $adyship+s (ouse in London; a "arcel of Whipper,snapper *par s- I would sooner marry our old "arson Adams. /ever tell me what "eople say! whilst I am happy in the Arms of him I love. *ome )ol s rail against other )ol s! because other )ol s have what some )ol s would be glad of.: <:And so!: answered the $ady! :if you was a #oman of 'ondition! you would really marry .r. Andrews.: < :Aes! I assure your $adyship!: replied 'lipslop, :if he would have me.: < :)ool! Idiot!: cries the $ady! :if he would have a #oman of )ashionB Is that a >uestion=: :/o truly! .adam!: said 'lipslop, :I believe it would be none! if -anny was out of the way; and I am confidous if I was in your $adyship+s "lace! and li ed .r. !oseph Andrews, she should not stay in the "arish a moment. I am sure $awyer 'cout would send her pac ing! if your $adyship would but say the #ord.: %his last *peech of 'lipslop raised a %empest in the .ind of her .istress. *he feared 'cout had betrayed her! or rather that she had betrayed herself. After some *ilence and a double 'hange of her 'omplexion; first to pale and then to red! she thus spo e- :I am astonished at the $iberty you give your %ongue. #ould you insinuate! that I employed 'cout against this #ench! on the account of the )ellow=: :$a .a+am!: said 'lipslop, frighted out of her #its.: :I assassinate such a %hingB: :I thin you dare not!: answered the $ady! :I believe my 'onduct may defy .alice itself to assert so cursed a *lander. If I had ever discovered any #antonness! any $ightness in my 1ehaviour- If I had followed the Example of some whom thou hast I believe seen! in allowing myself indecent $iberties! even with a (usband- 1ut the dear .an who is gone: 8here she began to sob9 :was he alive again!: 8then she produced (ears9 :could not upbraid me with any one Act of %enderness or "assion. /o! 'lipslop, all the time I cohabited with him! he never obtained even a 2iss from me! without my expressing Reluctance in the

granting it. I am sure he himself never suspected how much I loved him. <*ince his &eath! thou nowest! tho+ it is almost six #ee s 8it wants but a &ay9 ago! I have not admitted one Visitor! till this )ool my /ephew arrived. I have confined myself quite to one "arty of )riends. <And can such a 'onduct as this fear to be arraigned= %o be accused not only of a "assion which I have always despised; but of fixing it on such an ,b7ect! a 'reature so much beneath my /otice.: < :@pon my word! .a+am!: says 'lipslop,: :I do not understand your $adyship! nor now I any thing of the matter.: <:I believe indeed thou dost not understand me. < %hose are &elicacies which exist only in superior .inds; thy coarse Ideas cannot comprehend them. %hou art a low 'reature! of the Andrews 1reed! a Reptile of a lower ,rder! a #eed that grows in the common 4arden of the 'reation.: <:I assure your $adyship!: says 'lipslop, whose "assions were almost of as high an ,rder as her $ady+s! :I have no more to do with Common #arden than other )ol s. Really! your $adyship tal s of *ervants as if they were not born of the 'hristain 'pecious. *ervants have )lesh and 1lood as well as >uality; and .r. Andrews himself is a "roof that they have as good! if not better. And for my own "art! I can+t perceive my )earsQ are coarser than other "eople+s; and I am sure! if .r. Andrews was a )ear of mine! I should not be ashamed of him in company with 4entlemen; for whoever hath seen him in his new 'lothes! must confess he loo s as much li e a 4entleman as any body. 'oarse! quothaB I can+t bear to hear the poor young )ellow run down neither; for I will say this! I never heard him say an ill #ord of any body in his $ife. I am sure his 'oarseness doth not lie in his (eart; for he is the best0natur+d .an in the #orld; and as for his * in! it is no coarser than other "eople+s! I am sure. (is 1osom when a 1oy was as white as driven *now; and where it is not covered with (airs! is so still. Ifau insB if I was .rs. Andrews, with a hundred a Aear! I should not envy the best *he who wears a (ead. A #oman that could not be happy with such a .an! ought never to be so- )or if he can+t ma e a #oman happy! I never yet beheld the .an who could. I say again I wish I was a great $ady for his sa e! I believe when I had made a 4entleman of him! he+d behave so! that no body should discommend what I had done; and I fancy few would venture to tell him he was no 4entleman to his )ace! nor to mine neither.: At which #ords! ta ing up the 'andles! she as ed her .istress! who had been some time in her 1ed! if she had any farther 'ommands; who mildly answered she had none; and telling her! she was a comical 'reature! bid her 4ood0night. '(A". VII. Philosophical 7eflections, the li"e not to be found in any light -rench 7omance. $r. %ooby*s grave Advice to !oseph, and -anny*s &ncounter with a %eau. (abit! my good Reader! hath so vast a "revalence over the human .ind! that there is scarce any thing too strange or too strong to be asserted of it. %he *tory of the .iser! who from long accustoming to cheat others! came at last to cheat himself! and with great &elight and %riumph! pic ed his own "oc et of a 4uinea! to convey to his (oard! is not impossible or improbable. In li e manner! it fares with the "ractisers of &eceit! who from having long deceived their Acquaintance! gain at last a "ower of deceiving themselves! and acquire that very ,pinion 8however false9 of their own Abilities! Excellencies and Virtues! into which they have for Aears perhaps endeavoured to betray their /eighbours. /ow! Reader! to apply this ,bservation to my present "urpose! thou must now! that as the "assion generally called $ove! exercises most of the %alents of the )emale or fair #orld; so in this they now and then discover a small Inclination to &eceit; for which thou wilt not be angry with the beautiful 'reatures! when thou hast considered! that at the Age of seven or something earlier! .iss is instructed by her .other! that .aster is a very monstrous ind of Animal! who will! if she suffers him to come too near her! infallibly eat her up! and grind her to pieces. %hat so far from issing or toying with him of her own accord! she must not admit him to iss or toy with her. And lastly! that she must never have any Affection towards him; for if she should! all her )riends in "etticoats would esteem her a %raitress! point at her! and hunt her out of their *ociety. %hese Impressions being first received! are farther and deeper inculcated by their *chool0mistresses and 'ompanions; so that by the Age of %en they have contracted such a &read of! and Abhorrence of the above named .onster! that whenever they see him! they fly from him as the innocent (are doth from the 4reyhound. (ence to the Age of LG or LJ! they entertain a mighty Antipathy to .aster; they resolve and frequently profess that they will never have any 'ommerce with him! and entertain fond (opes of passing their $ives out of his reach! of the "ossibility of

which they have so visible an Example in their good .aiden Aunt. 1ut when they arrive at this "eriod! and have now past their second 'limacteric! when their #isdom grown riper! begins to see a little farther; and from almost daily falling in .aster+s way! to apprehend the great &ifficulty of eeping out of it; and when they observe him loo often at them! and sometimes very eagerly and earnestly too! 8for the .onster seldom ta es any notice of them till at this Age9 they then begin to thin of their &anger; and as they perceive they cannot easily avoid him! the wiser "art bethin themselves of providing by other .eans for their *ecurity. %hey endeavour by all the .ethods they can invent to render themselves so amiable in his Eyes! that he may have no Inclination to hurt them; in which they generally succeed so well! that his Eyes! by frequent languishing! soon lessen their Idea of his )ierceness! and so far abate their )ears! that they venture to parley with him; and when they perceive him so different from what he hath been described! all 4entleness! *oftness! 2indness! %enderness! )ondness! their dreadful Apprehensions vanish in a moment; and now 8it being usual with the human .ind to s ip from one Extreme to its ,pposite! as easily! and almost as suddenly! as a 1ird from one 1ough to another;9 $ove instantly succeeds to )ear- 1ut as it happens to "ersons! who have in their Infancy been thoroughly frightned with certain no "ersons called 4hosts! that they retain their &read of those 1eings! after they are convinced that there are no such things; so these young $adies! tho+ they no longer apprehend devouring! cannot so entirely sha e off all that hath been instilled into them; they still entertain the Idea of that 'ensure which was so strongly imprinted on their tender .inds! to which the &eclarations of Abhorrence they every day hear from their 'ompanions greatly contribute. %o avoid this 'ensure therefore! is now their only care; for which purpose they still pretend the same Aversion to the .onster- And the more they love him! the more ardently they counterfeit the Antipathy. 1y the continual and constant "ractice of which &eceit on others! they at length impose on themselves! and really believe they hate what they love. %hus indeed it happened to $ady %ooby, who loved !oseph long before she new it; and now loved him much more than she suspected. *he had indeed! from the time of his *ister+s Arrival in the >uality of her /iece; and from the Instant she viewed him in the &ress and 'haracter of a 4entleman! began to conceive secretly a &esign which $ove! had concealed from herself! +till &ream betrayed it to her. *he had no sooner risen than she sent for her /ephew; when he came to her! after many 'ompliments on his 'hoice! she told him! :(e might perceive in her 'ondescension to admit her own *ervant to her %able! that she loo ed on the )amily of Andrews as his Relations! and indeed her+s; that as he had married into such a )amily! it became him to endeavour by all .ethods to raise it as much as possible; at length she advised him to use all his Art to dissuade !oseph from his intended .atch! which would still enlarge their Relation to .eanness and "overty; concluding! that by a 'ommission in the Army! or some other genteel Employment! he might soon put young .r. Andrews on the foot of a 4entleman; and that being once done. his Accomplishments might quic ly gain him an Alliance! which would not be to their &iscredit.: (er /ephew heartily embraced this "roposal; and finding .r. !oseph with his #ife! at his Return to her 'hamber! he immediately began thus- :.y $ove to my dear Pamela, 1rother! will extend to all her Relations; nor shall I shew them less Respect than if I had married into the )amily of a &u e. I hope I have given you some early %estimonies of this! and shall continue to give you daily more. Aou will excuse me therefore! 1rother! if my 'oncern for your Interest ma es me mention what may be! perhaps! disagreeable to you to hear- 1ut I must insist upon it! that if you have any Value for my Alliance or my )riendship! you will decline any %houghts of engaging farther with a 4irl! who is! as you are a Relation of mine! so much beneath you. I now there may be at first some &ifficulty in your 'ompliance! but that will daily diminish; and you will in the end sincerely than me for my Advice. I own! indeed! the 4irl is handsome- 1ut 1eauty alone is a poor Ingredient! and will ma e but an uncomfortable .arriage.: :*ir!: said !oseph, :I assure you her 1eauty is her least "erfection; nor do I now a Virtue which that young 'reature is not possest of.: :As to her Virtues!: answered .r. %ooby, :you can be yet but a slender ?udge of them- 1ut if she had never so many! you will find her Equal in these among her *uperiors in 1irth and )ortune! which now you are to esteem on a footing with yourself; at least I will ta e care they shall shortly be so! unless you prevent me by degrading yourself with such a .atch! a .atch I have hardly patience to thin of; and which would brea the (earts of your "arents! who now re7oice in the Expectation of seeing you ma e a )igure in the #orld.: :I now not!: replied !oseph, :that my "arents have any power over my Inclinations; nor am I obliged to sacrifice my

(appiness to their #him or Ambition- 1esides! I shall be very sorry to see that the unexpected Advancement of my *ister! should so suddenly inspire them with this wic ed "ride! and ma e them despise their Equals! I am resolved on no account to quit my dear -anny, no! tho+ I could raise her as high above her present *tation as you have raised my *ister.: Aour *ister! as well as myself!: said %ooby, :are greatly obliged to you for the 'omparison- 1ut! *ir! she is not worthy to be compared in 1eauty to my Pamela; nor hath she half her .erit. And besides! *ir! as you civilly throw my .arriage with your *ister in my %eeth! I must teach you the wide &ifference between us; my )ortune enabled me to please myself; and it would have been as overgrown a )olly in me to have omitted it! as in you to do it.: :.y )ortune enables me to please myself li ewise!: said !oseph; :for all my "leasure is centred in -anny, and whilst I have (ealth! I shall be able to support her with my $abour in that *tation to which she was born! and with which she is content.: :1rother!: said Pamela, :.r. %ooby advises you as a )riend; and! no doubt! my "apa and .amma will be of his ,pinion! and will have great reason to be angry with you for destroying what his 4oodness hath done! and throwing down our )amily again! after he hath raised it. It would become you better! 1rother! to pray for the Assistance of 4race against such a "assion! than to indulge.: <:*ure! *ister! you are not in earnest; I am sure she is your Equal at least.: <:*he was my Equal! answered Pamela, but I am no longer Pamela Andrews, I am now this 4entleman+s #ife! and as such am above her<I hope I shall never behave with an unbecoming "ride; but at the same time I shall always endeavour to now myself! and question not the Assistance of 4race to that purpose.: %hey were now summoned to 1rea fast! and thus ended their &iscourse for the present! very little to the *atisfaction of any of the "arties. -A 4 was now wal ing in an Avenue at some distance from the (ouse! where !oseph had promised to ta e the first ,pportunity of coming to her. *he had not a *hilling in the #orld! and had subsisted ever since her Return entirely on the 'harity of "arson Adams. A young 4entleman attended by many *ervants! came up to her! and as ed her if that was not the $ady %ooby*s (ouse before him= %his indeed he well new; but had framed the >uestion for no other Reason than to ma e her loo up and discover if her )ace was equal to the &elicacy of her *hape. (e no sooner saw it! than he was struc with Ama5ement. (e stopt his (orse! and swore she was the most beautiful 'reature he ever beheld. %hen instantly alighting! and delivering his (orse to his *ervant! he rapt out half a do5en ,aths that he would iss her; to which she at first submitted! begging he would not be rude- but he was not satisfied with the 'ivility of a *alute! nor even with the rudest Attac he could ma e on her $ips! but caught her in his Arms and endeavoured to iss her 1reasts! which with all her *trength she resisted; and as our *par was not of the 1erculean Race! with some difficulty prevented. %he young 4entleman being soon out of breath in the *truggle! quitted her! and remounting his (orse called one of his *ervants to him! whom he ordered to stay behind with her! and ma e her any ,ffers whatever! to prevail on her to return home with him in the Evening; and to assure her he would ta e her into 2eeping. (e then rode on with his other *ervants! and arrived at the $ady+s (ouse! to whom he was a distant Relation! and was come to pay a Visit. %he trusty )ellow! who was employ+d in an ,ffice he had been long accustomed to! discharged his "art with all the )idelity and &exterity imaginable; but to no purpose. *he was entirely deaf to his ,ffers! and re7ected them with the utmost &isdain. At last the "imp! who had perhaps more warm 1lood about him than his .aster! began to sollicit for himself; he told her! tho+ he was a *ervant! he was a .an of some )ortune! which he would ma e her .istress of<and this without any Insult to her Virtue! for that he would marry her. *he answer+d! if his .aster himself! or the greatest $ord in the $and would marry her! she would refuse him. At last being weary with "ersuasions! and on fire with 'harms which would have almost indled a )lame in the 1osom of an antient "hilosopher! or modern &ivine! he fastened his (orse to the 4round! and attac ed her with much more )orce than the 4entleman had exerted. "oor -anny would have been able to resist his Rudeness a very short time! when the &eity who presides over chaste $ove sent her !oseph to her Assistance. (e no sooner came within sight! and perceived her struggling with a .an! than li e a 'annon01all! or li e $ightning! or any thing that is swifter! if any thing be! he ran towards her! and coming up 7ust as the Ravisher had torn her (and erchief from her 1reast! before his $ips had touched that *eat of Innocence and 1liss! he dealt him so lusty a 1low in that part of his /ec which a Rope would have become with the utmost "ropriety! that the )ellow staggered bac wards! and perceiving he had to do with something rougher than the little! tender! trembling (and of -anny, he quitted her! and turning about saw his Rival! with )ire flashing

from his Eyes! again ready to assail him; and indeed before he could well defend himself or return the first 1low! he received a second! which had it fallen on that part of the *tomach to which it was directed! would have been probably the last he would have had any ,ccasion for; but the Ravisher lifting up his (and! drove the 1low upwards to his .outh! whence it dislodged three of his %eeth; and now not conceiving any extraordinary Affection for the 1eauty of !oseph*s "erson! nor being extremely pleased with this method of *alutation! he collected all his )orce! and aimed a 1low at !oseph*s 1reast! which he artfully parry+d with one )ist! so that it lost its )orce entirely in Air. And stepping one )oot bac ward! he darted his )ist so fiercely at his Enemy! that had he not caught it in his (and 8for he was a 1oxer of no inferiour )ame9 it must have tumbled him on the 4round. And now the Ravisher meditated another 1low! which he aimed at that part of the 1reast where the (eart is lodged! !oseph did not catch it as before! but so prevented its Aim! that it fell directly on his /ose! but with abated )orce. !oseph then moving both )ist and )oot forwards at the same time! threw his (ead so dextrously into the *tomach of the Ravisher! that he fell a lifeless $ump on the )ield! where he lay many .inutes breathless and motionless. #hen -anny saw her !oseph receive a 1low in his )ace! and 1lood running in a *tream from him! she began to tear her (air! and invo e all human and divine "ower to his Assistance. *he was not! however! long under this Affliction! before !oseph having conquered his Enemy! ran to her! and assured her he was not hurt; she then instantly fell on her 2nees and than ed 4<! that he had made !oseph the means of her Rescue! and at the same time preserved him from being in7ured in attempting it. *he offered with her (and erchief to wipe his 1lood from his )ace; but he seeing his Rival attempting to recover his $egs! turned to him and as ed him if he had enough; to which the other answer+d he had; for he believed he had fought with the &evil! instead of a .an! and loosening his (orse! said he should not have attempted the #ench if he had nown she had been so well provided for. -A 4 now begged !oseph to return with her to "arson Adams, and to promise that he would leave her no more; these were "ropositions so agreeable to !oseph, that had he heard them he would have given an immediate Assent- but indeed his Eyes were now his only *ense; for you may remember! Reader! that the Ravisher had tore her (and erchief from -anny*s /ec ! by which he had discovered such a *ight; that !oseph hath declared all the *tatues he ever beheld were so much inferiour to it in 1eauty! that it was more capable of converting a .an into a *tatue! than of being imitated by the greatest .aster of that Art. %his modest 'reature! whom no #armth in *ummer could ever induce to expose her 'harms to the wanton *un! a .odesty to which perhaps they owed their inconceivable #hiteness! had stood many .inutes barenec ed in the "resence of !oseph, before her Apprehension of his &anger! and the (orror of seeing his 1lood would suffer her once to reflect on what concerned herself; till at last! when the 'ause of her 'oncern had vanished! an Admiration at his *ilence! together with observing the fixed "osition of his Eyes! produced an Idea in the lovely .aid! which brought more 1lood into her )ace than had flowed from !oseph*s /ostrils. %he snowy (ue of her 1osom was li ewise exchanged to Vermillion at the instant when she clapped her (and erchief round her /ec . !oseph saw the @neasiness she suffered! and immediately removed his Eyes from an ,b7ect! in surveying which he had felt the greatest &elight which the ,rgans of *ight were capable of conveying to his *oul. *o great was his )ear of offending her! and so truly did his "assion for her deserve the noble /ame of $ove. -A 4 being recovered from her 'onfusion! which was almost equalled by what !oseph had felt from observing it! again mention+d her Request; this was instantly and gladly complied with! and together they crossed two or three )ields! which brought them to .r. Adams. '(A". VIII. A )iscourse which happened between $r. Adams, $rs. Adams, !oseph and -anny; with some %ehaviour of $r. Adams, which will be called by some few 7eaders, very low, absurd, and unnatural. %he "arson and his #ife had 7ust ended a long &ispute when the $overs came to the &oor. Indeed this young 'ouple had been the *ub7ect of the &ispute; for .rs. Adams was one of those prudent "eople who never do any thing to in7ure their )amilies! or perhaps one of those good .others who would even stretch their 'onscience to serve their 'hildren. *he had long entertained hopes of seeing her eldest &aughter succeed

.rs. 'lipslop, and of ma ing her second *on an Exciseman by $ady %ooby*s Interest. %hese were Expectations she could not endure the %houghts of quitting! and was therefore very uneasy to see her (usband so resolute to oppose the $ady+s Intention in -anny*s Affair. *he told him! :it behoved every .an to ta e the first 'are of his )amily; that he had a #ife and six 'hildren! the maintaining and providing for whom would be 1usiness enough for him without intermeddling in other )ol s Affairs; that he had always preached up *ubmission to *uperiours! and would do ill to give an Example of the contrary 1ehaviour in his own 'onduct; that if $ady %ooby did wrong! she must answer for it herself! and the *in would not lie at their &oor; that -anny had been a *ervant! and bred up in the $ady+s own )amily! and consequently she must have nown more of her than they did! and it was very improbable if she had behaved herself well! that the $ady would have been so bitterly her Enemy; that perhaps he was too much inclined to thin well of her because she was handsome! but handsome #omen were often no better than they should be; that 4< made ugly #omen as well as handsome ones! and that if a #oman had Virtue! it signified nothing whether she had 1eauty or no.: )or all which Reasons she concluded! he should oblige the $ady and stop the future "ublication of the 1anns- but all these excellent Arguments had no effect on the "arson! who persisted in doing his &uty without regarding the 'onsequence it might have on his worldly Interest; he endeavoured to answer her as well as he could! to which she had 7ust finished her Reply; for she had always the last #ord every where but at 'hurch! when !oseph and -anny entered their 2itchin! where the "arson and his #ife then sat at 1rea fast over some 1acon and 'abbage. %here was a 'oldness in the 'ivility of .rs. Adams, which "ersons of accurate *peculation might have observed! but escaped her present 4uests; indeed it was a good deal covered by the (eartiness of Adams, who no sooner heard that -anny had neither eat nor dran that .orning! than he presented her a 1one of 1acon which he had 7ust been gnawing! being the only Remains of his "rovision! and then ran nimbly to the %ap! and produced a .ug of small 1eer! which he called Ale! however it was the best in his (ouse. !oseph addressing himself to the "arson! told him the &iscourse which had past between *quire %ooby, his *ister and himself! concerning -anny- he then acquainted him with the &angers whence he had rescued her! and communicated some Apprehensions on her account. (e concluded! that he should never have an easy .oment till -anny was absolutely his! and begged that he might be suffered to fetch a $icence! saying! he could easily borrow the .oney. %he "arson answered! that he had already given his *entiments concerning a $icence! and that a very few &ays would ma e it unnecessary. : !oseph,: says he! :I wish this (aste doth not arise rather from your Impatience than your )ear- but as it certainly springs from one of these 'auses! I will examine both. ,f each of these therefore in their %urn; and first! for the first of these! namely! Impatience. /ow! 'hild! I must inform you! that if in your purposed .arriage with this young #oman! you have no Intention but the Indulgence of carnal Appetites! you are guilty of a very heinous *in. .arriage was ordained for nobler "urposes! as you will learn when you hear the *ervice provided on that ,ccasion read to you. All such brutal $usts and Affections are to be greatly subdued! if not totally eradicated! before the Vessel can be said to be consecrated to (onour. %o marry with a View of gratifying those Inclinations is a "rostitution of that holy 'eremony! and must entail a 'urse on all who so lightly underta e it. If! therefore! this (aste arises from Impatience! you are to correct! and not give way to it. /ow as to the second (ead which I proposed to spea to! namely! )ear. It argues a &iffidence highly criminal of that "ower in which alone we should put our %rust! seeing we may be well assured that he is able not only to defeat the &esigns of our Enemies! but even to turn their (earts. Instead of ta ing therefore any un7ustifiable or desperate means to rid ourselves of )ear! we should resort to "rayer only on these ,ccasions! and we may be then certain of obtaining what is best for us. #hen any Accident threatens us! we are not to despair! nor when it overta es us! to grieve; we must submit in all things to the #ill of "rovidence! and set our Affections so much on nothing here that we cannot quit it without Reluctance. Aou are a young .an! and can now but little of this #orld! I am older! and have seen a great deal. All "assions are criminal in their Excess! and even $ove itself! if it is not subservient to our &uty! may render us blind to it. (ad Abraham so loved his *on .saac, as to refuse the *acrifice required! is there any of us who would not condemn him= !oseph, I now! your many good >ualities! and value you for them- but as I am to render an Account of your *oul! which is committed to my 'ure! I cannot see any )ault without reminding you of it. Aou are too much inclined to "assion! 'hild! and have set your Affections so absolutely on this young #oman! that if 4< required her at your hands! I fear you would reluctantly part with her. /ow

believe me! no 'hristian ought so to set his (eart on any "erson or %hing in this #orld! but that whenever it shall be required or ta en from him in any manner by &ivine "rovidence! he may be able! peaceably! quietly! and contentedly to resign it.: At which #ords one came hastily in and acquainted .r. Adams that his youngest *on was drowned. (e stood silent a moment! and soon began to stamp about the Room and deplore his $oss with the bitterest Agony. !oseph, who was overwhelmed with 'oncern li ewise! recovered himself sufficiently to endeavour to comfort the "arson; in which Attempt he used many Arguments that he had at several times remember+d out of his own &iscourses both in private and public ! 8for he was a great Enemy to the "assions! and preached nothing more than the 'onquest of them by Reason and 4race9 but he was not at leisure now to hear en to his Advice. :'hild! 'hild!: said he! :do not go about Impossibilities. (ad it been any other of my 'hildren I could have born it with patience; but my little "rattler! the &arling and 'omfort of my old Age<the little #retch to be snatched out of $ife 7ust at his Entrance into it; the sweetest! best0 temper+d 1oy! who never did a thing to offend me. It was but this .orning I gave him his first $esson in Eu9 #enus. %his was the very 1oo he learnt! poor 'hildB it is of no further use to thee now. (e would have made the best *cholar! and have been an ,rnament to the 'hurch< such "arts and such 4oodness never met in one so young. And the handsomest $ad too!: says .rs. Adams, recovering from a *woon in -anny*s Arms <:.y poor !ac"y, shall I never see thee more=: cries the "arson< :Aes! surely!: says !oseph, and in a better "lace! you will meet again never to part more:<I believe the "arson did not hear these #ords! for he paid little regard to them! but went on lamenting whilst the %ears tric led down into his 1osom. At last he cry+d out! :#here is my little &arling=: and was sallying out! when to his great *urpri5e and ?oy! in which I hope the Reader will sympathi5e! he met his *on in a wet 'ondition indeed! but alive! and running towards him. %he "erson who brought the /ews of his .isfortune! had been a little too eager! as "eople sometimes are! from I believe no very good "rinciple! to relate ill /ews; and seeing him fall into the River! instead of running to his Assistance! directly ran to acquaint his )ather of a )ate which he had concluded to be inevitable! but whence the 'hild was relieved by the same poor "edlar who had relieved his )ather before from a less &istress. %he "arson+s ?oy was now as extravagant as his 4rief had been before; he issed and embraced his *on a thousand times! and danced about the Room li e one frantic ; but as soon as he discovered the )ace of his old )riend the "edlar! and heard the fresh ,bligation he had to him! what were his *ensations= not those which two 'ourtiers feel in one another+s Embraces; not those with which a great .an receives the vile! treacherous Engines of his wic ed "urposes; not those with which a worthless younger 1rother wishes his elder ?oy of a *on! or a .an congratulates his Rival on his obtaining a .istress! a "lace! or an (onour. </o! Reader! he felt the Ebullition! the ,verflowings of a full! honest! open (eart towards the "erson who had conferred a real ,bligation! and of which if thou can+st not conceive an Idea within! I will not vainly endeavour to assist thee. #hen these %umults were over! the "arson ta ing !oseph aside! proceeded thus<:/o! !oseph, do not give too much way to thy "assions! if thou dost expect (appiness.: <%he "atience of !oseph, nor perhaps of !ob, could bear no longer; he interrupted the "arson! saying! :it was easier to give Advice than ta e it! nor did he perceive he could so entirely conquer himself! when he apprehended he had lost his *on! or when he found him recover+d: <:1oy!: reply+d Adams, raising his Voice! :it doth not become green (eads to advise grey (airs<%hou art ignorant of the %enderness of fatherly Affection; when thou art a )ather thou wilt be capable then only of nowing what a )ather can feel. /o .an is obliged to Impossibilities! and the $oss of a 'hild is one of those great %rials where our 4rief may be allowed to become immoderate.: :#ell! *ir!: cries !oseph, :and if I love a .istress as well as you your 'hild! surely her $oss would grieve me equally.: :Aes! but such $ove is )oolishness! and wrong in itself! and ought to be conquered!: answered Adams, :it savours too much of the )lesh.: :*ure! *ir!: says !oseph, :it is not sinful to love my #ife! no not even to doat on her to &istractionB: :Indeed but it is!: says Adams. :Every .an ought to love his #ife! no doubt; we are commanded so to do; but we ought to love them with .oderation and &iscretion.: < :I am afraid I shall be guilty of some *in! in spight of all my Endeavours!: says !oseph; :for I shall love without any .oderation! I am sure.: <:Aou tal foolishly and childishly!: cries Adams. :Indeed!: says .rs. Adams, who had listened to the latter part of their 'onversation! :you tal more foolishly yourself. I hope! my &ear! you will never preach any such &octrine as that (usbands can love their #ives too well. If I new you had such a *ermon in the (ouse! I am sure I would burn it; and I declare if I had not been convinced you had loved me as well as

you could! I can answer for myself I should have hated and despised you. .arry come upB )ine &octrine indeedB A #ife hath a Right to insist on her (usband+s loving her as much as ever he can- And he is a sinful Villain who doth not. &oth he not promise to love her! and to comfort her! and to cherish her! and all that= I am sure I remember it all! as well as if I had repeated it over but Aesterday! and shall never forget it. 1esides! I am certain you do not preach as you practise; for you have been a loving and a cherishing (usband to me! that+s the truth on+t; and why you should endeavour to put such wic ed /onsense into this young .an+s (ead! I cannot devise. &on+t hear en to him! .r. !oseph, be as good a (usband as you are able! and love your #ife with all your 1ody and *oul too.: (ere a violent Rap at the &oor put an end to their &iscourse! and produced a *cene which the Reader will find in the next 'hapter. '(A". IC. A <isit which the good Lady %ooby and her polite -riend paid to the Parson. %he $ady %ooby had no sooner had an Account from the 4entleman of his meeting a wonderful 1eauty near her (ouse! and perceived the Raptures with which he spo e of her! than immediately concluding it must be -anny, she began to meditate a &esign of bringing them better acquainted; and to entertain (opes that the fine 'lothes! "resents and "romises of this Aouth! would prevail on her to abandon !oseph- *he therefore proposed to her 'ompany a #al in the )ields before &inner! when she led them towards .r. Adams*s (ouse; and as she approached it! told them! if they pleased she would divert them with one of the most ridiculous *ights they had ever seen! which was an old foolish "arson! who! she said laughing! ept a #ife and six 1rats on a *alary of about FI "ounds a Aear; adding! that there was not such another ragged )amily in the "arish. %hey all readily agreed to this Visit! and arrived whilst .rs. Adams was declaiming! as in the last 'hapter. 1eau )idapper, which was the /ame of the young 4entleman we have seen riding towards $ady %ooby*s, with his 'ane mimic ed the Rap of a London )ootman at the &oor. %he "eople within; namely! Adams, his #ife! and three 'hildren! !oseph, -anny, and the "edlar! were all thrown into 'onfusion by this 2noc ; but Adams went directly to the &oor! which being opened! the $ady %ooby and her 'ompany wal ed in! and were received by the "arson with about two hundred 1ows; and by his #ife with as many 'urt+sies; the latter telling the $ady! :*he was ashamed to be seen in such a "ic le! and that her (ouse was in such a $itter- 1ut that if she had expected such an (onour from her $adyship! she should have found her in a better manner.: %he "arson made no Apologies! tho+ he was in his (alf0'assoc and a )lannel /ight0'ap. (e said! :they were heartily welcome to his poor 'ottage!: and turning to .r. )idapper, cried out! on mea renidet in )omo Lacunar- %he 1eau answered! :(e did not understand Welch;: at which the "arson stared! and made no Reply. .r. )idapper, or 1eau )idapper, was a young 4entleman of about four )oot five Inches in height. (e wore his own (air! tho+ the *carcity of it might have given him sufficient Excuse for a "eriwig. (is )ace was thin and pale- %he *hape of his 1ody and $egs none of the best; for he had very narrow *houlders! and no 'alf; and his 4ait might more properly be called hopping than wal ing. %he >ualifications of his .ind were well adapted to his "erson. #e shall handle them first negatively. (e was not entirely ignorant- )or he could tal a little -rench, and sing two or three .talian *ongs- (e had lived too much in the #orld to be bashful! and too much at 'ourt to be proud- (e seemed not much inclined to Avarice; for he was profuse in his Expences/or had he all the )eatures of "rodigality; for he never gave a *hilling- </o (ater of #omen; for he always dangled after them; yet so little sub7ect to $ust! that he had! among those who new him best! the 'haracter of great .oderation in his "leasures. /o &rin er of #ine; nor so addicted to "assion! but that a hot #ord or two from an Adversary made him immediately cool. /ow! to give him only a &ash or two on the affirmative *ide- :%ho+ he was born to an immense )ortune! he chose! for the pitiful and dirty 'onsideration of a "lace of little consequence! to depend entirely on the #ill of a )ellow! whom they call a 4reat0.an; who treated him with the utmost &isrespect! and exacted of him a plenary ,bedience to his 'ommands; which he implicitly submitted to! at the Expence of his 'onscience! his (onour! and his 'ountry; in which he had himself so very large a *hare.: And to finish his 'haracter! As he was entirely well satisfied with his own "erson and "arts! so he was very apt to ridicule and laugh at any

Imperfection in another.: *uch was the little "erson or rather %hing that hopped after $ady %ooby into .r. Adams*s 2itchin. %he "arson and his 'ompany retreated from the 'himney0side! where they had been seated! to give room to the $ady and hers. Instead of returning any of the 'urt+sies or extraordinary 'ivility of .rs. Adams, the $ady turning to .r. %ooby, cried out! :Euelle %Jte5 Euel AnimalB: And presently after discovering -anny 8for she did not need the 'ircumstance of her standing by !oseph to assure the Identity of her "erson9 she as ed the 1eau! :#hether he did not thin her a pretty 4irl=: <:1egad! .adam!: answered he! :+tis the very same I met.: :I did not imagine!: replied the $ady! :you had so good a %aste.: :1ecause I never li ed you! I warrant!: cries the 1eau. :RidiculousB: said she! you now you was always my Aversion.: :I would never mention Aversion!: answered the 1eau! :with that )ace; dear $ady %ooby, wash your )ace before you mention Aversion! I beseech you.: (e then laughed and turned about to coquette it with -anny. .rs. Adams had been all this time begging and praying the $adies to sit down! a )avour which she had at last obtained. %he little 1oy to whom the Accident had happened! still eeping his "lace by the )ire! was chid by his .other for not being more mannerly- 1ut $ady %ooby too his part! and commending his 1eauty! told the "arson he was his very "icture. *he then seeing a 1oo in his (and! as ed! :if he could read=: :Aes!: cried Adams, :a little Latin, .adam! he is 7ust got into Eu9 #enus.: <:A )ig for Buere genius,: answered she! :let me hear him read a little &nglish.: <:Lege, )ic", Lege,: said Adams- 1ut the 1oy made no Answer! till he saw the "arson nit his 1rows; and then cried! :I don+t understand you! )ather.: :(ow! 1oy!: says Adams, :#hat doth Lego ma e in the imperative .ood= Legito, doth it not=: :Aes!: answered )ic". <:And what besides!: says the )ather. :Lege,: quoth the *on! after some hesitation. :A good 1oy!: says the )ather- :And now! 'hild! #hat is the &nglish of Lego=: <%o which the 1oy! after long pu55ling! answered! he could not tell. :(ow!: cries Adams in a "assion! <:#hat hath the #ater washed away your $earning= #hy! what is Latin for the &nglish Verb read. 'onsider before you spea .: <%he 'hild considered some time! and then the "arson cried twice or thrice! :Le;, Le;.: <)ic" answered! :Lego.: < :Very well;<and then! what is the &nglish,: says the "arson! :of the Verb Lego.: <:(o read,: cried )ic" . <:Very well!: said the "arson! :a good 1oy! you can do well! if you will ta e pains. <I assure your $adyship he is not much above eight Aears old! and is out of his Propria Bu9 $aribus already. < 'ome! )ic", read to her $adyship;: <which she again desiring! in order to give the 1eau %ime and ,pportunity with -anny, )ic" began as in the following 'hapter. '(A". C. (he 1istory of two -riends, which may afford an useful Lesson to all those Persons, who happen to ta"e up their 7esidence in married -amilies. :$eonard and Paul were two )riends.: <:"ronounce it Lennard, 'hild!: cry+d the "arson. <:"ray! .r. Adams,: says $ady %ooby, :let your *on read without Interruption.: )ic" then proceeded. :Lennard and Paul were two )riends! who having been educated together at the same *chool! commenced a )riendship which they preserved a long time for each other. It was so deeply fixed in both their .inds! that a long Absence! during which they had maintained no 'orrespondence! did not eradicate nor lessen it- 1ut it revived in all its )orce at their first .eeting! which was not till after fifteen Aears Absence! most of which %ime Lennard had spent in the &ast,.ndi,es.: <:"ronounce it short .ndies,: says Adams. <:"ray! *ir! be quiet!: says the $ady. <%he 1oy repeated< :in the &ast,.ndies, whilst Paul had served his 2ing and 'ountry in the Army. In which different *ervices! they had found such different *uccess! that Lennard was now married! and retired with a )ortune of thirty thousand "ound; and Paul was arrived to the &egree of a $ieutenant of )oot; and was not worth a single *hilling.: :%he Regiment in which Paul was stationed! happened to be ordered into >uarters! within a small distance from the Estate which Lennard had purchased; and where he was settled. %his latter! who was now become a 'ountry 4entleman and a ?ustice of "eace! came to attend the >uarter0*essions! in the %own where his old )riend was quartered! soon after his Arrival. *ome Affair in which a *oldier was concerned! occasioned Paul to attend the ?ustices. .anhood! and %ime! and the 'hange of 'limate had so much altered Lennard, that Paul did not immediately recollect the )eatures of his old Acquaintance- 1ut it was otherwise with Lennard.

(e new Paul the moment he saw him; nor could he contain himself from quitting the 1ench! and running hastily to embrace him. Paul stood at first a little surpri5ed; but had soon sufficient Information from his )riend! whom he no sooner remembred! than he returned his Embrace with a "assion which made many of the *pectators laugh! and gave to some few a much higher and more agreeable *ensation. :/ot to detain the Reader with minute 'ircumstances! Lennard insisted on his )riend+s returning with him to his (ouse that Evening; which Request was complied with! and $eave for a .onth+s Absence for Paul, obtained of the commanding ,fficer. :If it was possible for any 'ircumstance to give any addition to the (appiness which Paul proposed in this Visit! he received that additional "leasure! by finding on his Arrival at his )riend+s (ouse! that his $ady was an old Acquaintance which he had formerly contracted at his >uarters; and who had always appeared to be of a most agreeable %emper. A 'haracter she had ever maintained among her Intimates! being of that number! every Individual of which is called quite the best sort of #oman in the #orld. :1ut good as this $ady was! she was still a #oman; that is to say! an Angel and not an Angel:<:Aou must mista e! 'hild!: cries the "arson! :for you read /onsense.: :It is so in the 1oo ! answered the *on.: .r. Adams was then silenc+d by Authority! and )ic" proceeded<:)or tho+ her "erson was of that ind to which .en attribute the /ame of Angel! yet in her "assions she was perfectly #oman. ,f which a great degree of ,bstinacy was the most remar able! and perhaps most pernicious. :A day or two past after Paul*s Arrival before any Instances of this appear+d; but it was impossible to conceal it long. 1oth she and her (usband soon lost all Apprehension from their )riend+s "resence! and fell to their &isputes with as much Vigour as ever. %hese were still pursued with the utmost Ardour and Eagerness! however trifling the 'auses were whence they first arose. /ay! however incredible it may seem! the little 'onsequence of the matter in &ebate was frequently given as a Reason for the )ierceness of the 'ontention! as thus- .f you loved me, sure you would never dispute with me such a (rifle as this . %he Answer to which is very obvious; for the Argument would hold equally on both sides and was constantly retorted with some Addition! as <. am sure . have much more 7eason to say so, who am in the right . &uring all these &isputes! Paul always ept strict *ilence! and preserved an even 'ountenance without shewing the least visible Inclination to either "arty. ,ne day! however! when .adam had left the Room in a violent )ury! Lennard could not refrain from referring his 'ause to his )riend. #as ever any thing so unreasonable! says he! as this #oman= #hat shall I do with her= I doat on her to &istraction; nor have I any 'ause to complain of more than this ,bstinacy in her %emper; whatever she asserts she will maintain against all the Reason and 'onviction in the #orld. "ray give me your Advice. <)irst! says Paul, I will give my ,pinion! which is flatly that you are in the wrong; for supposing she is in the wrong! was the *ub7ect of your 'ontention anywise material= #hat signified it whether you was married in a red or yellow #aistcoat= for that was your &ispute. /ow suppose she was mista en! as you love her you say so tenderly! and I believe she deserves it! would it not have been wiser to have yielded! tho+ you certainly new yourself in the right! than to give either her or yourself any @neasiness= )or my own part! if ever I marry! I am resolved to enter into an Agreement with my #ife! that in all &isputes 8especially about %rifles9 that "arty who is most convinced they are right! shall always surrender the Victory- by which means we shall both be forward to give up the 'ause. I own! said Lennard, my dear )riend! sha ing him by the (and! there is great %ruth and Reason in what you say; and I will for the future endeavour to follow your Advice. %hey soon after bro e up the 'onversation! and Lennard going to his #ife! as ed her pardon! and told her his )riend had convinced him he had been in the wrong. *he immediately began a vast Encomium on Paul, in which he seconded her! and both agreed he was the worthiest and wisest .an upon Earth. #hen next they met! which was at *upper! tho+ she had promised not to mention what her (usband told her! she could not forbear casting the indest and most affectionare $oo s on Paul, and as ed him with the sweetest Voice! whether she should help him to some "otted0 #oodcoc = <"otted "artridge! my &ear! you mean! says the (usband. .y &ear! says she! I as your )riend if he will eat any potted #oodcoc ; and I am sure I must now who potted it. I thin I should now too who shot them! reply+d the (usband! and I am convinced I have not seen a #oodcoc this Aear; however! tho+ I now I am in the right I submit! and the potted "artridge is potted #oodcoc ! if you desire to have it so. It is equal to me! says she! whether it is one or the other; but you would persuade one out of one+s *enses; to be sure you are always in the right in your own ,pinion; but your )riend I believe nows which he is eating.

Paul answered nothing! and the &ispute continued as usual the greatest part of the Evening. %he next .orning the $ady accidentally meeting Paul, and being convinced he was her )riend! and of her side! accosted him thus- <I am certain! *ir! you have long since wonder+d at the @nreasonableness of my (usband. (e is indeed in other respects a good sort of .an; but so positive! that no #oman but one of my complying %emper could possibly live with him. #hy last /ight now! was ever any 'reature so unreasonable= <I am certain you must condemn him< "ray answer me! was he not in the wrong= Paul, after a short *ilence! spo e as follows- I am sorry! .adam! that as 4ood0manners obliges me to answer against my #ill! so an Adherence to %ruth forces me to declare myself of a different ,pinion. %o be plain and honest! you was entirely in the wrong; the 'ause I own not worth disputing! but the 1ird was undoubtedly a "artridge. , *ir! reply+d the $ady! I cannot possibly help your %aste<.adam! returned Paul, that is very little material; for had it been otherwise! a (usband might have expected *ubmission<IndeedB *ir! says she! I assure youB < Aes! .adam! cry+d he! he might from a "erson of your excellent @nderstanding; and pardon me for saying such a 'ondescension would have shewn a *uperiority of *ense even to your (usband himself<1ut! dear *ir! said she! why should I submit when I am in the right= <)or that very Reason! answer+d he! it would be the greatest Instance of Affection imaginable- for can any thing be a greater ,b7ect of our 'ompassion than a "erson we love! in the wrong. Ay! but I should endeavour! said she! to set him right. "ardon me! .adam! answered Paul, I will apply to your own Experience! if you ever found your Arguments had that effect. %he more our ?udgments err! the less we are willing to own it- for my own part! I have always observed the "ersons who maintain the worst side in any 'ontest! are the warmest. #hy! says she! I must confess there is %ruth in what you say! and I will endeavour to practice it. %he (usband then coming in! Paul departed. And Lennard approaching his #ife with an Air of 4ood0humour! told her he was sorry for their foolish &ispute the last /ight- but he was now convinced of his Error. *he answered smiling! she believed she owed his 'ondescension to his 'omplacence; that she was ashamed to thin a #ord had past on so silly an ,ccasion! especially as she was satisfy+d she had been mista en. A little 'ontention followed! but with the utmost 4ood0will to each other! and was concluded by her asserting that Paul had thoroughly convinced her she had been in the wrong. @pon which they both united in the "raises of their com0)riend. :PADL now past his time with great *atisfaction; these &isputes being much less frequent as well as shorter than usual- but the &evil! or some unluc y Accident in which perhaps the &evil had no hand! shortly put an end to his (appiness. (e was now eternally the private Referee of every &ifference; in which after having perfectly as he thought established the &octrine of *ubmission! he never scrupled to assure both privately that they were in the right in every Argument! as before he had followed the contrary .ethod. ,ne day a violent $itigation happened in his Absence! and both "arties agreed to refer it to his &ecision. %he (usband professing himself sure the &ecision would be in his favour! the #ife answer+d! he might be mista en; for she believed his )riend was convinced how seldom she was to blame <and that if he new all. <%he (usband reply+d<.y &ear! I have no desire of any Retrospect! but I believe if you new all too! you would not imagine my )riend so entirely on your side. /ay! says she! since you provo e me! I will mention one Instance. Aou may remember our &ispute about sending !ac"y to *chool in cold #eather! which "oint I gave up to you from mere 'ompassion! nowing myself to be in the right! and Paul himself told me afterwards! he thought me so. .y &ear! replied the (usband! I will not scruple your Veracity; but I assure you solemnly! on my applying to him! he gave it absolutely on my side! and said he would have acted in the same manner. %hey then proceeded to produce numberless other Instances! in all which Paul had! on Vows of *ecrecy! given his ,pinion on both sides. In the 'onclusion! both believing each other! they fell severely on the %reachery of Paul, and agreed that he had been the occasion of almost every &ispute which had fallen out between them. %hey then became extremely loving! and so full of 'ondescension on both sides! that they vyed with each other in censuring their own 'onduct! and 7ointly vented their Indignation on Paul, whom the #ife! fearing a bloody 'onsequence! earnestly entreated her (usband to suffer quietly to depart the next &ay! which was the time fixed for his Return to >uarters! and then drop his Acquaintance. :(owever ungenerous this 1ehaviour in Lennard may be esteemed! his #ife obtained a "romise from him 8tho+ with difficulty9 to follow her Advice; but they both exprest such unusual 'oldness that day to Paul, that he! who was quic of Apprehension! ta ing Lennard aside! prest him so home! that he at last discovered the

*ecret. Paul ac nowledged the %ruth! but told him the &esign with which he had done it <%o which the other answered! he would have acted more friendly to have let him into the whole &esign; for that he might have assured himself of his *ecrecy. Paul reply+d! with some Indignation! he had given him a sufficient "roof how capable he was of concealing a *ecret from his #ife. Lennard returned with some #armth <(e had more reason to upbraid him! for that he had caused most of the >uarrels between them by his strange 'onduct! and might 8if they had not discovered the Affair to each other9 have been the ,ccasion of their *eparation. Paul then said<1ut something now happened! which put a stop to )ic"*s Reading! and of which we shall treat in the next 'hapter.: '(A". CI. .n which the 1istory is continued. !O'&P1 A )7&W' had borne with great @neasiness the Impertinence of 1eau )idapper to -anny, who had been tal ing pretty freely to her! and offering her *ettlements; but the Respect to the 'ompany had restrained him from interfering! whilst the 1eau confined himself to the @se of his %ongue only; but the said 1eau watching an ,pportunity whilst the $adies Eyes were disposed another way! offered a Rudeness to her with his (ands; which !oseph no sooner perceived than he presented him with so sound a 1ox on the Ear! that it conveyed him several "aces from where he stood. %he $adies immediately s reamed out! rose from their 'hairs! and the 1eau! as soon as he recovered himself! drew his (anger! which Adams observing! snatched up the $id of a "ot in his left (and! and covering himself with it as with a *hield! without any #eapon of ,ffence in his other (and! stept in before !oseph, and exposed himself to the enraged 1eau! who threatened such "erdition and &estruction! that it frighted the #omen! who were all got in a huddle together! out of their #its; even to hear his &enunciations of Vengeance. !oseph was of a different 'omplexion! and begged Adams to let his Rival come on; for he had a good 'udgel in his (and! and did not fear him. -anny now fainted into .rs. Adams*s Arms! and the whole Room was in 'onfusion! when .r. %ooby passing by Adams, who lay shug under the "ot0$id! came up to )idapper, and insisted on his sheathing the (anger! promising he should have *atisfaction; which !oseph declared he would give him! and fight him at any #eapon whatever. %he 1eau now sheathed his (anger! and ta ing out a "oc et04lass! and vowing Vengeance all the %ime! he re0ad7usted his (air; the "arson deposited his *hield! and !oseph running to -anny, soon brought her bac to $ife. $ady %ooby chid !oseph for his Insult on )idapper; but he answered he would have attac ed an Army in the same 'ause. :#hat 'ause=: said the $ady. :.adam!: answered !oseph, :he was rude to that young #oman.: <:#hat!: says the $ady! :I suppose he would have issed the #ench; and is a 4entleman to be struc for such an ,ffer= I must tell you! !oseph, these Airs do not become you.: <:.adam!: said .r. %ooby, :I saw the whole Affair! and I do not commend my 1rother; for I cannot perceive why he should ta e upon him to be this 4irl+s 'hampion.: <:I can commend him!: says Adams, :he is a brave $ad; and it becomes any .an to be the 'hampion of the Innocent; and he must be the basest 'oward! who would not vindicate a #oman with whom he is on the 1rin of .arriage.: <:*ir!: says .r. %ooby, :my 1rother is not a proper .atch for such a young #oman as this.: <:/o!: says $ady %ooby, :nor do you! .r. Adams, act in your proper 'haracter! by encouraging any such &oings; and I am very much surpri5ed you should concern yourself in it. I thin your #ife and )amily your properer 'are.: < :Indeed! .adam! your $adyship says very true!: answered .rs. Adams, :he tal s a pac of /onsense! that the whole "arish are his 'hildren. I am sure I don+t understand what he means by it; it would ma e some #omen suspect he had gone astray- but I acquit him of that; I can read *cripture as well as he; and I never found that the "arson was obliged to provide for other )ol s 'hildren; and besides he is but a poor 'urate! and hath little enough! as your $adyship nows! for me and mine.: < :Aou say very well! .rs. Adams,: quoth the $ady %ooby, who had not spo e a #ord to her before! :you seem to be a very sensible #oman; and I assure you! your (usband is acting a very foolish "art! and opposing his own Interest; seeing my /ephew is violently set against this .atch- and indeed I can+t blame him; it is by no means one suitable to our )amily.: In this manner the $ady proceeded with .rs. Adams, whilst the 1eau hopped about the Room! sha ing his (ead; partly from "ain! and partly from Anger; and Pamela was chiding -anny for her Assurance! in aiming at such a .atch as her 1rother. <"oor -anny answered only with her %ears! which had long since begun to

wet her (and erchief; which !oseph perceiving! too her by the Arm! and wrapping it in his! carried her off! swearing he would own no Relation to any one who was an Enemy to her he lov+d more than all the #orld. (e went out with -anny under his left Arm! brandishing a 'udgel in his right! and neither .r. %ooby nor the 1eau thought proper to oppose him. $ady %ooby and her 'ompany made a very short stay behind him; for the $ady+s 1ell now summoned them to dress; for which they had 7ust time before &inner. A)A$' seemed now very much de7ected! which his #ife perceiving! began to apply some matrimonial 1alsam. *he told him he had Reason to be concerned; for that he had most probably ruined his )amily with his %ric s- 1ut perhaps he was grieved for the $oss of his two 'hildren! !oseph and -anny. (is eldest &aughter went on- <:Indeed )ather! it is very hard to bring *trangers here to eat your 'hildren+s 1read out of their .ouths. <Aou have ept them ever since they came home; and for any thing I see to the contrary may eep them a .onth longer- Are you obliged to to give her .eat! tho+f she was never so handsome= 1ut I don+t see she is so much handsomer than other "eople. If "eople were to be ept for their 1eauty! she would scarce fare better than her /eighbours! I believe. < As for .r. !oseph, I have nothing to say! he is a young .an of honest "rinciples! and will pay some time or other for what he hath- 1ut for the 4irl! <#hy doth she not return to her "lace she ran away from= I would not give such a Vagabond *lut a (alfpenny! tho+ I had a .illion of .oney; no! tho+ she was starving.: :Indeed but I would!: cries little )ic"; :and )ather! rather than poor -anny shall be starved! I will give her all this 1read and 'heese.: <8 Offering what he held in his 1and.9 <Adams smiled on the 1oy! and told him he re7oiced to see he was a 'hristian; and that if he had a (alfpenny in his "oc et he would have given it him; telling him! it was his &uty to loo upon all his /eighbours as his 1rothers and *isters! and love them accordingly. :Aes! "apa!: says he! :I love her better than my *isters; for she is handsomer than any of them.: :Is she so! *aucebox!: says the *ister! giving him a 1ox on the Ear! which the )ather would probably have resented! had not !oseph, -anny, and the "edlar! at that Instant! returned together. < Adams bid his #ife prepare some )ood for their &inner; she said! :truly she could not! she had something else to do.: Adams rebu ed her for disputing his 'ommands! and quoted many %exts of *cripture to prove! that the 1usband is the 1ead of the Wife, and she is to submit and obey . %he #ife answered! :it was 1lasphemy to tal *cripture out of 'hurch; that such things were very proper to be said in the "ulpit- but that it was prophane to tal them in in common &iscourse. !oseph told .r. Adams he was not come with any &esign to give him or .rs. Adams any trouble; but to desire the )avour of all their 'ompany to the #eorge 8an Alehouse in the "arish!9 where he had bespo e a "iece of 1acon and 4reens for their &inner.: .rs. Adams, who was a very good sort of #oman! only rather too strict in ,economic s! readily accepted this Invitation! as did the "arson himself by her Example; and away they all wal ed together! not omitting little )ic", to whom !oseph gave a *hilling! when he heard of his intended $iberality to -anny. '(A". CII. Where the good,natur*d 7eader will see something which will give him no great Pleasure. %he "edlar had been very inquisitive from the time he had first heard that the great (ouse in this "arish belonged to the $ady %ooby; and had learnt that she was the #idow of *ir (homas, and that *ir (homas had bought -anny, at about the Age of three or four Aears! of a travelling #oman; and now their homely but hearty .eal was ended! he told -anny, he believed he could acquaint her with her "arents. %he whole 'ompany! especially she herself! started at this ,ffer of the "edlar+s. < (e then proceeded thus! while they all lent their strictest Attention- :%ho+ I am now contented with this humble way of getting my $ivelihood! I was formerly a 4entleman; for so all those of my "rofession are called. In a word! I was a &rummer in an .rish Regiment of )oot. #hilst I was in this honourable *tation! I attended an ,fficer of our Regiment into &ngland a recruiting. In our .arch from %ristol to -roome 8for since the &ecay of the #oollen %rade! the clothing %owns have furnished the Army with a great number of Recruits9 we overtoo on the Road a #oman who seemed to be about thirty Aears old! or thereabouts! not very handsome; but well enough for a *oldier. As we came up to her! she mended her "ace! and falling into &iscourse with our $adies 8for every .an of the "arty! namely! a *er7eant! two private .en! and a &rum! were provided with their #oman! except myself9 she continued to travel on with us. I perceiving she must fall to my $ot! advanced presently to her! made $ove to her in our military way! and quic ly succeeded to my #ishes. #e struc a 1argain within a

.ile! and lived together as .an and #ife to her dying &ay.: <:I suppose!: says Adams interrupting him! :you were married with a $icence- )or I don+t see how you could contrive to have the 1anns published while you were marching from "lace to "lace.: <:/o! *ir!: said the "edlar! :we too a $icence to go to 1ed together! without any 1anns.: <:Ay! ay!: said the "arson! : e8 ecessitate, a $icence may be allowable enough; but surely! surely! the other is the more regular and eligible #ay.: <%he "edlar proceeded thus! :*he returned with me to our Regiment! and removed with us from >uarters to >uarters! till at last! whilst we lay at #alloway, she fell ill of a )ever! and died. #hen she was on her &eath0bed she called me to her! and crying bitterly! declared she could not depart this #orld without discovering a *ecret to me! which she said was the only *in which sat heavy on her (eart. *he said she had formerly travelled in a 'ompany of 4ipsies! who had made a "ractice of stealing away 'hildren; that for her own part! she had been only once guilty of the 'rime; which she said she lamented more than all the rest of her *ins! since probably it might have occasioned the &eath of the "arents- )or! added she! it is almost impossible to describe the 1eauty of the young 'reature! which was about a Aear and half old when I idnapped it. #e ept her 8for she was a 4irl9 above two Aears in our 'ompany! when I sold her myself for three 4uineas to *ir (homas %ooby in 'omersetshire. /ow! you now whether there are any more of that /ame in this 'ounty.: <:Aes!: says Adams, :there are several %oobys who are *quires; but I believe no 1aronet now alive! besides it answers so exactly in every "oint there is no room for &oubt; but you have forgot to tell us the "arents from whom the 'hild was stolen.: <:%heir /ame!: answered the "edlar! :was Andrews. %hey lived about thirty .iles from the *quire; and she told me! that I might be sure to find them out by one 'ircumstance; for that they had a &aughter of a very strange /ame Pamela or Pamela, *ome pronounced it one way! and some the other.: -anny, who had changed 'olour at the first mention of the /ame! now fainted away! !oseph turned pale! and poor )ic"y began to roar; the "arson fell on his 2nees and e7aculated many %han sgivings that this &iscovery had been made before the dreadful *in of Incest was committed; and the "edlar was struc with Ama5ement! not being able to account for all this 'onfusion! the 'ause of which was presently opened by the "arson+s &aughter! who was the only unconcerned "erson; for the .other was chaffing -anny*s %emples! and ta ing the utmost care of her9 and indeed -anny was the only 'reature whom the &aughter would not have pitied in her *ituation; wherein! tho+ we compassionate her ourselves! we shall leave her for a little while! and pay a short Visit to $ady %ooby. '(A". CIII. (he 1istory returning to the Lady %ooby, gives some Account of the terrible Conflict in her %reast between Love and Pride; with what happened on the present )iscovery. %he $ady sat down with her 'ompany to &inner- but eat nothing. As soon as her 'loth was removed! she whispered Pamela, that she was ta en a little ill! and desired her to entertain her (usband and 1eau )idapper. *he then went up into her 'hamber! sent for 'lipslop, threw herself on the 1ed! in the Agonies of $ove! Rage! and &espair; nor could she conceal these boiling "assions longer! without bursting. 'lipslop now approached her 1ed! and as ed how her $adyship did; but instead of revealing her &isorder! as she intended! she entered into a long Encomium on the 1eauty and Virtues of !oseph Andrews; ending at last with expressing her 'oncern! that so much %enderness should be thrown away on so despicable an ,b7ect as -anny. 'lipslop well nowing how to humour her .istress+s )ren5y! proceeded to repeat! with Exaggeration if possible! all her .istress had said! and concluded with a #ish! that !oseph had been a 4entleman! and that she could see her $ady in the Arms of such a (usband. %he $ady then started from the 1ed! and ta ing a %urn or two cross the Room! cry+d out with a deep *igh!< 'ure he would ma"e any Woman happy. <:Aour $adyship!: says she! :would be the happiest #oman in the #orld with him. <A fig for 'ustom and /onsense. #hat vails what "eople say= *hall I be afraid of eating *weetmeats! because "eople may say I have a sweet %ooth= If I had a mind to marry a .an! all the #orld should not hinder me. Aour $adyship hath no "arents to tutelar your .nfections; besides he is of your $adyship+s )amily now! and as good a 4entleman as any in the 'ountry; and why should not a #oman follow her .ind as well as a .an= #hy should not your $adyship marry the 1rother! as well as your /ephew the *ister. I am sure! if it was a fragrant 'rime I would not persuade your $adyship to it.: <:1ut! dear 'lipslop,: answered the $ady! :if I could prevail on

myself to commit such a #ea ness! there is that cursed -anny in the way! whom the Idiot! , how I hate and despise him:< :*he! a little ugly .ynx!: cries 'lipslop, :leave her to me. <I suppose your $adyship hath heard of !oseph*s fitting with one of .r. )idapper*s *ervants about her; and his .aster hath ordered them to carry her away by force this Evening. I+ll ta e care they shall not want Assistance. I was tal ing with his 4entleman! who was below 7ust when your $adyship sent for me.: <:4o bac !: says the $ady %ooby, :this Instant; for I expect .r. )idapper will soon be going. &o all you can; for I am resolved this #ench shall not be in our )amily; I will endeavour to return to the 'ompany; but let me now as soon as she is carried off.: 'lipslop went away! and her .istress began to arraign her 'onduct in the following .anner:#hat am I doing= (ow do I suffer this "assion to creep imperceptibly upon meB (ow many &ays are past since I could have submitted to as myself the >uestion= <.arry a )ootmanB &istractionB 'an I afterwards bear the Eyes of my Acquaintance= 1ut I can retire from them; retire with one in whom I propose more (appiness than the #orld without him can give meB Retire<to feed continually on 1eauties! which my inflamed Imagination sic ens with eagerly ga5ing on; to satisfy every Appetite! every &esire! with their utmost #ish. <(aB and do I doat thus on a )ootmanB I despise! I detest my "assion. <Aet why= Is he not generous! gentle! ind= <2ind to whom! to the meanest #retch! a 'reature below my 'onsideration. &oth he not= <Aes! he doth prefer her; curse his 1eauties! and the little low (eart that possesses them; which can basely descend to this despicable #ench! and be ungratefully deaf to all the (onours I do him. <And can I then love this .onster= /o! I will tear his Image from my 1osom! tread on him! spurn him. I will have those pitiful 'harms which now I despise! mangled in my sight; for I will not suffer the little ?ade I hate to riot in the 1eauties I contemn. /o! tho+ I despise him myself; tho+ I would spurn him from my )eet! was he to languish at them! no other should taste the (appiness I scorn. #hy do I say (appiness= %o me it would be .isery. <%o sacrifice my Reputation! my 'haracter! my Ran in $ife! to the Indulgence of a mean and a vile Appetite. <(ow I detest the %houghtB (ow much more exquisite is the "leasure resulting from the Reflection of Virtue and "rudence! than the faint Relish of what flows from Vice and )ollyB #hither did I suffer this improper! this mad "assion to hurry me! only by neglecting to summon the Aids of Reason to my Assistance= Reason! which hath now set before me my &esires in their proper 'olours! and immediately helped me to expel them. Aes! I than (eaven and my "ride! I have now perfectly conquered this unworthy "assion; and if there was no ,bstacle in its way! my "ride would disdain any "leasures which could be the 'onsequence of so base! so mean! so vulgar<.: 'lipslop returned at this Instant in a violent (urry! and with the utmost Eagerness! cry+d out!<:,! .adam! I have strange /ews. (om the )ootman is 7ust come from the #eorge; where it seems !oseph and the rest of them are a =in"etting; and he says! there is a strange .an who hath discovered that -anny and !oseph are 1rother and *ister.: <:(ow! 'lipslop,: cries the $ady in a *urpri5e. <:I had not time! .adam!: cries 'lipslop, :to enquire about Particles, but (om says! it is most certainly true.: %his unexpected Account entirely obliterated all those admirable Reflections which the supreme "ower of Reason had so wisely made 7ust before. In short! when &espair! which had more share in producing the Resolutions of (atred we have seen ta en! began to retreat! the $ady hesitated a .oment! and then forgetting all the "urport of her *oliloquy! dismissed her #oman again! with ,rders to bid (om attend her in the "arlour! whither she now hastened to acquaint Pamela with the /ews. Pamela said! she could not believe it)or she had never heard that her .other had lost any 'hild! or that she had ever had more than !oseph and herself. %he $ady flew into a violent Rage with her! and tal ed of @pstarts and disowning Relations! who had so lately been on a level with her. Pamela made no answer- 1ut her (usband! ta ing up her 'ause! severely reprimanded his Aunt for her 1ehaviour to his #ife; he told her! if it had been earlier in the Evening! she should not have staid a .oment longer in her (ouse; that he was convinced! if this young #oman could be proved her *ister! she would readily embrace her as such; and he himself would do the same- (e then desired the )ellow might be sent for! and the young #oman with him; which $ady %ooby immediately ordered! and thin ing proper to ma e some Apology to Pamela for what she had said! it was readily accepted! and all things reconciled. %he "edlar now attended! as did -anny, and !oseph who would not quit her; the "arson li ewise was induced! not only by 'uriosity! of which he had no small "ortion! but his &uty! as he apprehended it! to

follow them- for he continued all the way to exhort them! who were now brea ing their (earts! to offer up %han sgivings! and be 7oyful for so miraculous an Escape. #hen they arrived at %ooby,1all, they were presently called into the "arlour! where the "edlar repeated the same *tory he had told before! and insisted on the %ruth of every 'ircumstance; so that all who heard him were extremely well satisfied of the %ruth! except Pamela, who imagined! as she had never heard either of her "arents mention such an Accident! that it must be certainly false; and except the $ady %ooby, who suspected the )alshood of the *tory! from her ardent &esire that it should be true; and !oseph who feared its %ruth! from his earnest #ishes that it might prove false. .r. %ooby now desired them all to suspend their 'uriosity and absolute 1elief or &isbelief! till the next .orning! when he expected old .r. Andrews and his #ife to fetch himself and Pamela home in his 'oach! and then they might be certain of certainly nowing the %ruth or )alshood of this Relation; in which he said! as there were many strong 'ircumstances to induce their 'redit! so he could not perceive any Interest the "edlar could have in inventing it! or in endeavouring to impose such a )alshood on them. %he $ady %ooby, who was very little used to such 'ompany! entertained them all! vi2. (er /ephew! his #ife! her 1rother and *ister! the 1eau! and the "arson! with great 4ood0humour at her own %able. As to the "edlar! she ordered him to be made as welcome as possible! by her *ervants. All the 'ompany in the "arlour! except the disappointed $overs! who sat sullen and silent! were full of .irth- )or .r. %ooby had prevailed on !oseph to as .r. )idapper*s pardon; with which he was perfectly satisfied. .any ?o es past between the 1eau and the "arson! chiefly on each other+s &ress; these afforded much &iversion to the 'ompany. Pamela chid her 1rother !oseph for the 'oncern which he exprest at discovering a new *ister. *he said! if he loved -anny as he ought! with a pure Affection! he had no Reason to lament being related to her. <@pon which Adams began to discourse on Platonic $ove; whence he made a quic %ransition to the ?oys in the next #orld! and concluded with strongly asserting that there was no such thing as "leasure in this. At which Pamela and her (usband smiled on one another. %his happy "air proposing to retire 8for no other "erson gave the least *ymptom of desiring Rest9 they all repaired to several 1eds provided for them in the same (ouse; nor was Adams himself suffered to go home! it being a stormy /ight. -anny indeed often begged she might go home with the "arson; but her *tay was so strongly insisted on! that she at last! by !oseph*s Advice! consented. '(A". CIV. Containing several curious ight,Adventures, in which $r. Adams fell into many 1air,breadth* 'capes, partly owing to his #oodness, and partly to his .nadvertency. About an (our after they had all separated 8it being now past three in the .orning9 1eau )idapper, whose "assion for -anny permitted him not to close his Eyes! but had employed his Imagination in 'ontrivances how to satisfy his &esires! at last hit on a .ethod by which he hoped to effect it. (e had ordered his *ervant to bring him word where -anny lay! and had received his Information; he therefore arose! put on his 1reeches and /ightgown! and stole softly along the 4allery which led to her Apartment; and being come to the &oor! as he imagined it! he opened it with the least /oise possible! and entered the 'hamber. A *avour now invaded his /ostrils which he did not expect in the Room of so sweet a young 'reature! and which might have probably had no good effect on a cooler $over. (owever! he groped out the 1ed with difficulty; for there was not a 4limpse of $ight! and opening the 'urtains! he whispered in !oseph*s Voice 8for he was an excellent .imic 9 : -anny, my Angel! I am come to inform thee that I have discovered the )alshood of the *tory we last /ight heard. I am no longer thy 1rother! but thy $over; nor will I be delayed the En7oyment of thee one .oment longer. Aou have sufficient Assurances of my 'onstancy not to doubt my marrying you! and it would be want of $ove to deny me the possession of thy 'harms.: < *o saying! he disencumbered himself from the little 'lothes he had on! and leaping into 1ed! embraced his Angel! as he conceived her! with great Rapture. If he was surpri5ed at receiving no Answer! he was no less pleased to find his (ug returned with equal Ardour. (e remained not long in this sweet 'onfusion; for both he and his "aramour presently discovered their mutual &eceit. Indeed it was no other than the accomplished 'lipslop whom he had engaged; but tho+ she immediately new the "erson whom she had mista en for !oseph, he was at a loss to

guess at the Representative of -anny. (e had so little seen or ta en notice of this 4entlewoman! that $ight itself would have afforded him no Assistance in his 'on7ecture. 1eau )idapper no sooner had perceived his .ista e! than he attempted to escape from the 1ed with much greater (aste than he had made to it; but the watchful 'lipslop prevented him. )or that prudent #oman being disappointed of those delicious ,fferings which her )ancy had promised her "leasure! resolved to ma e an immediate *acrifice to her Virtue. Indeed she wanted an ,pportunity to heal some #ounds which her late 'onduct had! she feared! given her Reputation; and as she had a wonderful "resence of .ind! she conceived the "erson of the unfortunate 1eau to be luc ily thrown in her way to restore her $ady+s ,pinion of her impregnable 'hastity. At that instant therefore! when he offered to leap from the 1ed! she caught fast hold of his *hirt! at the same time roaring out! :, thou VillainB who hast attac ed my 'hastity! and I believe ruined me in my *leep; I will swear a Rape against thee! I will prosecute thee with the utmost Vengeance.: %he 1eau attempted to get loose! but she held him fast! and when he struggled! she cry+d out! :.urtherB .urtherB RapeB RobberyB RuinB: At which #ords "arson Adams, who lay in the next 'hamber! wa eful and meditating on the "edlar+s &iscovery! 7umped out of 1ed! and without staying to put a rag of 'lothes on! hastened into the Apartment whence the 'ries proceeded. (e made directly to the 1ed in the dar ! where laying hold of the 1eau+s * in 8for 'lipslop had torn his *hirt almost off9 and finding his * in extremely soft! and hearing him in a low Voice begging 'lipslop to let him go! he no longer doubted but this was the young #oman in danger of ravishing! and immediately falling on the 1ed! and laying hold on 'lipslop*s 'hin! where he found a rough 1eard! his 1elief was confirmed; he therefore rescued the 1eau! who presently made his Escape! and then turning towards 'lipslop, receiv+d such a 'uff on his 'hops! that his #rath indling instantly! he offered to return the )avour so stoutly! that had poor 'lipslop received the )ist! which in the dar past by her and fell on the "illow! she would most probably have given up the 4host. <Adams missing his 1low! fell directly on 'lipslop, who cuffed and scratched as well as she could; nor was he behind0hand with her! in his Endeavours! but happily the &ar ness of the /ight befriended her<*he then cry+d she was a #oman; but Adams answered she was rather the &evil! and if she was! he would grapple with him; and being again irritated by another *tro e on his 'hops! he gave her such a Remembrance in the 4uts! that she began to roar loud enough to be heard all over the (ouse. Adams then sei5ing her by the (air 8for her &ouble0clout had fallen off in the *cuffle9 pinned her (ead down to the 1olster! and then both called for $ights together. %he $ady %ooby, who was as wa eful as any of her 4uests! had been alarmed from the beginning; and! being a #oman of a bold *pirit! she slipt on a /ightgown! "etticoat and *lippers! and ta ing a 'andle! which always burnt in her 'hamber! in her (and! she wal ed undauntedly to 'lipslop*s Room; where she entred 7ust at the instant as Adams had discovered! by the two .ountains which 'lipslop carried before her! that he was concerned with a )emale. (e then concluded her to be a #itch! and said he fancied those 1reasts gave suc to a $egion of &evils. 'lipslop seeing $ady %ooby enter the Room! cried! 1elp5 or . am ravished, with a most audible Voice! and Adams perceiving the $ight! turned hastily and saw the $ady 8as she did him9 7ust as she came to the )eet of the 1ed! nor did her .odesty! when she found the na ed 'ondition of Adams, suffer her to approach farther. <*he then began to revile the "arson as the wic edest of all .en! and particularly railed at his Impudence in chusing her (ouse for the *cene of his &ebaucheries! and her own #oman for the ,b7ect of his 1estiality. "oor Adams had before discovered the 'ountenance of his 1edfellow! and now first recollecting he was na ed! he was no less confounded than $ady %ooby herself! and immediately whipt under the 1ed0clothes! whence the chaste 'lipslop endeavoured in vain to shut him out. %hen putting forth his (ead! on which! by way of ,rnament! he wore a )lannel /ightcap! he protested his Innocence! and as ed ten thousand "ardons of .rs. 'lipslop for the 1lows he had struc her! vowing he had mista en her for a #itch. $ady %ooby then! casting her Eyes on the 4round! observed something spar le with great $ustre! which! when she had ta en it up! appeared to be a very fine pair of &iamond 1uttons for the *leeves. A little farther she saw lie the *leeve itself of a *hirt with laced Ruffles. :(eydayB: says she! :what is the meaning of this= <:,! .adam!: says 'lipslop, :I don+t now what hath happened! I have been so terrified. (ere may have been a do5en .en in the Room.: :%o whom belongs this laced *hirt and ?ewels=: says the $ady <:@ndoubtedly!: cries the "arson! :to the young 4entleman whom I mistoo for a #oman on coming into the Room! whence proceeded all the subsequent .ista es; for if I had suspected him for a .an! I would have sei5ed him had he been another 1ercules, tho+ indeed he seems rather to resemble 1ylas.: (e then gave an Account of the Reason of his

rising from 1ed! and the rest! till the $ady came into the Room; at which! and the )igures of 'lipslop and her 4allant! whose (eads only were visible at the opposite 'orners of the 1ed! she could not refrain from $aughter! nor did 'lipslop persist in accusing the "arson of any .otions towards a Rape. %he $ady therefore desired him to return to his 1ed as soon as she was departed! and then ordering 'lipslop to rise and attend her in her own Room! she returned herself thither. #hen she was gone! Adams renewed his "etitions for "ardon to .rs. 'lipslop, who with a most 'hristian %emper not only forgave! but began to move with much 'urtesy towards him! which he ta ing as a (int to be gone! immediately quitted the 1ed! and made the best of his way towards his own; but unluc ily instead of turning to the right! he turned to the left! and went to the Apartment where -anny, who 8as the Reader may remember9 had not slept a win the preceding /ight! and who was so hagged out with what had happen+d to her in the &ay! that notwithstanding all %houghts of her !oseph, she was fallen into so profound a *leep! that all the /oise in the ad7oining Room had not been able to disturb her. Adams groped out the 1ed! and turning the 'lothes down softly! a 'ustom .rs. Adams had long accustomed him to! crept in! and deposited his 'arcase on the 1edpost! a "lace which that good #oman had always assigned him. As the 'at or $apdog of some lovely /ymph for whom ten thousand $overs languish! lies quietly by the side of the charming .aid! and ignorant of the *cene of &elight on which they repose! meditates the future 'apture of a .ouse! or *urpri5al of a "late of 1read and 1utter- so Adams, lay by the side of -anny, ignorant of the "aradise to which he was so near! nor could the Emanation of *weets which flowed from her 1reath! overpower the )umes of %obacco which played in the "arson+s /ostrils. And now *leep had not overta en the good .an! when !oseph, who had secretly appointed -anny to come to her at the brea of &ay! rapped softly at the 'hamber0&oor! which when he had repeated twice! Adams cry+d Come in, whoever you are. !oseph thought he had mista en the &oor! tho+ she had given him the most exact &irections; however! nowing his )riend+s Voice! he opened it! and saw some female Vestments lying on a 'hair. -anny wa ing at the same instant! and stretching out her (and on Adams*s 1eard! she cry+d out!<:, (eavensB where am I=: :1less meB where am I=: said the "arson. %hen -anny s reamed! Adams leapt out of 1ed! and !oseph stood! as the %ragedian calls it! li e the 'tatue of 'urpri2e. :1ow came she into my 7oom =: cry+d Adams . :1ow came you into hers= cry+d !oseph, in an Astonishment. :I now nothing of the matter!: answered Adams, :but that she is a Vestal for me. As I am a 'hristian! I now not whether she is a .an or #oman. (e is an Infidel who doth not believe in #itchcraft. %hey as surely exist now as in the &ays of 'aul . .y 'lothes are bewitched away too! and -anny*s brought into their place.: )or he still insisted he was in his own Apartment; but -anny denied it vehemently! and said his attempting to persuade !oseph of such a )alshood! convinced her of his wic ed &esigns. (owB said !oseph, in a Rage! :(ath he offered any Rudeness to you=: <*he answered! she could not accuse him of more than villainously stealing to 1ed to her! which she thought Rudeness sufficient! and what no .an would do without a wic ed Intention. !oseph*s great ,pinion of Adams was not easily to be staggered! and when he heard from -anny that no (arm had happened! he grew a little cooler; yet still he was confounded! and as he new the (ouse! and that the #omen+s Apartments were on this side .rs. 'lipslop*s Room! and the .en+s on the other! he was convinced that he was in -anny*s 'hamber. Assuring Adams, therefore! of this %ruth! he begged him to give some Account how he came there. Adams then! standing in his *hirt! which did not offend -anny as the 'urtains of the 1ed were drawn! related all that had happened! and when he had ended! !oseph told him! it was plain he had mista en! by turning to the right instead of the left. :,dsoB: cries Adams, :that+s true! as sure as *ixpence! you have hit on the very thing.: (e then traversed the Room! rubbing his (ands! and begged -anny*s pardon! assuring her he did not now whether she was .an or #oman. %hat innocent 'reature firmly believing all he said! told him! she was no longer angry! and begged !oseph to conduct him into his own Apartment! where he should stay himself! till she had put her 'lothes on. !oseph and Adams accordingly departed! and the latter soon was convinced of the .ista e he had committed; however! whilst he was dressing himself! he often asserted he believed in the "ower of #itchcraft notwithstanding! and did not see how a 'hristian could deny it.

'(A". CV. (he Arrival of #affar and #ammar Andrews, with another Person, not much e8pected; and a perfect 'olution of the )ifficulties raised by the Pedlar. As soon as -anny was drest! !oseph returned to her! and they had a long 'onversation together! the 'onclusion of which was! that if they found themselves to be really 1rother and *ister! they vowed a perpetual 'elibacy! and to live together all their &ays! and indulge a Platonic" )riendship for each other. %he 'ompany were all very merry at 1rea fast! and !oseph and -anny rather more cheerful than the preceding /ight. %he $ady %ooby produced the &iamond 1utton! which the 1eau most readily owned! and alledged that he was very sub7ect to wal in his *leep. Indeed he was far from being ashamed of his Amour! and rather endeavoured to insinuate that more than was really true had past between him and the fair 'lipslop. %heir %ea was scarce over! when /ews came of the Arrival of old .r. Andrews and his #ife. %hey were immediately introduced and indly received by the $ady %ooby, whose (eart went now pit0a0pat! as did those of !oseph and -anny. %hey felt perhaps little less Anxiety in this Interval than Oedipus himself whilst his )ate was revealing. .r. %ooby first open+d the 'ause! by informing the old 4entleman that he had a 'hild in the 'ompany more than he new of! and ta ing -anny by the (and! told him! this was that &aughter of his who had been stolen away by 4ypsies in her Infancy. .r. Andrews, after expressing some Astonishment! assured his (onour that he had never lost a &aughter by 4ypsies! nor ever had any other 'hildren than !oseph and Pamela. %hese #ords were a 'ordial to the two $overs; but had a different effect on $ady %ooby . *he ordered the "edlar to be called! who recounted his *tory as he had done before. <At the end of which! old .rs. Andrews running to -anny, embraced her! crying out! 'he is, she is my Child. %he 'ompany were all ama5ed at this &isagreement between the .an and his #ife; and the 1lood had now forsa en the 'hee s of the $overs! when the old #oman turning to her (usband! who was more surpri5ed than all the rest! and having a little recovered her own *pirits! delivered herself as follows. :Aou may remember! my &ear! when you went a *er7eant to #ibraltar you left me big with 'hild! you staid abroad you now upwards of three Aears. In your Absence I was brought to bed! I verily believe of this &aughter! whom I am sure I have reason to remember! for I suc led her at this very 1reast till the &ay she was stolen from me. ,ne Afternoon! when the 'hild was about a Aear! or a Aear and half old! or thereabouts! two 4ipsy #omen came to the &oor! and offered to tell my )ortune. ,ne of them had a 'hild in her $ap; I shewed them my (and! and desired to now if you was ever to come home again! which I remember as well as if it was but yesterday! they faithfully promised me you should< I left the 4irl in the 'radle! and went to draw them a 'up of $iquor! the best I had; when I returned with the "ot 8I am sure I was not absent longer than whilst I am telling it to you9 the #omen were gone. I was afraid they had stolen something! and loo ed and loo ed! but to no purpose! and (eaven nows I had very little for them to steal. At last hearing the 'hild cry in the 'radle! I went to ta e it up <but O the livingB how was I surpri5ed to find! instead of my own 4irl that I had put into the 'radle! who was as fine a fat thriving 'hild as you shall see in a *ummer+s &ay! a poor sic ly 1oy! that did not seem to have an (our to live. I ran out! pulling my (air off! and crying li e any mad after the #omen! but never could hear a #ord of them from that &ay to this. #hen I came bac ! the poor Infant 8which is our !oseph there! as stout as he now stands9 lifted up its Eyes upon me so piteously! that to be sure! notwithstanding my "assion! I could not find in my heart to do it any mischief. A /eighbour of mine happening to come in at the same time! and hearing the 'ase! advised me to ta e care of this poor 'hild! and 4< would perhaps one day restore me my own. @pon which I too the 'hild up! and suc led it to be sure all the #orld as if it had been born of my own natural 1ody. And as true as I am alive! in a little time I loved the 1oy all to nothing as if it had been my own 4irl. <#ell! as I was saying! %imes growing very hard! I having two 'hildren! and nothing but my own #or ! which was little enough! 4< nows! to maintain them! was obliged to as Relief of the "arish; but instead of giving it me! they removed me! by ?ustices #arrants! fifteen .iles to the "lace where I now live! where I had not been long settled before you came home. !oseph 8for that was the /ame I gave him myself <the $ord nows whether he was bapti5ed or no! or by what /ame9 !oseph, I say! seemed to me to be about five Aears old when you returned; for I believe he is two or three Aears older than our &aughter here; 8for I am thoroughly convinced she is the same9 and when you saw him you said he was a chopping 1oy! without

ever minding his Age; and so I seeing you did not suspect any thing of the matter! thought I might e+en as well eep it to myself! for fear you should not love him as well as I did. And all this is veritably true! and I will ta e my ,ath of it before any ?ustice in the 2ingdom.: %he "edlar! who had been summoned by the ,rder of $ady %ooby, listened with the utmost Attention to 4ammar Andrews*s *tory! and when she had finished! as ed her if the supposititious 'hild had no .ar on its 1reast= %o which she answered! :Aes! he had as fine a *trawberry as ever grew in a 4arden.: %his !oseph ac nowledged! and unbuttoning his 'oat! at the Intercession of the 'ompany! shewed to them. :#ell!: says 4affar Andrews, who was a comical sly old )ellow! and very li ely desired to have no more 'hildren than he could eep! :you have proved! I thin ! very plainly that this 1oy doth not belong to us; but how are you certain that the 4irl is ours=: %he "arson then brought the "edlar forward! and desired him to repeat the *tory which he had communicated to him the preceding &ay at the Alehouse; which he complied with! and related what the Reader! as well as .r. Adams, hath seen before. (e then confirmed! from his #ife+s Report! all the 'ircumstances of the Exchange! and of the *trawberry on !oseph*s 1reast. At the Repetition of the #ord *trawberry! Adams, who had seen it without any Emotion! started! and cry+d! %less me5 something comes into my 1ead. 1ut before he had time to bring any thing out! a *ervant called him forth. #hen he was gone! the "edlar assured !oseph, that his "arents were "ersons of much greater 'ircumstances than those he had hitherto mista en for such; for that he had been stolen from a 4entleman+s (ouse! by those whom they call 4ypsies! and had been ept by them during a whole Aear! when loo ing on him as in a dying 'ondition! they had exchanged him for the other healthier 'hild! in the manner before related. (e said! as to the /ame of his )ather! his #ife had either never nown or forgot it; but that she had acquainted him he lived about forty .iles from the "lace where the Exchange had been made! and which way! promising to spare no "ains in endeavouring with him to discover the "lace. 1ut )ortune! which seldom doth good or ill! or ma es .en happy or miserable by halves! resolved to spare him this $abour. %he Reader may please to recollect! that .r. Wilson had intended a ?ourney to the #est! in which he was to pass through .r. Adams*s "arish! and had promised to call on him. (e was now arrived at the $ady %ooby*s 4ates for that purpose! being directed thither from the "arson+s (ouse! and had sent in the *ervant whom we have above seen call .r. Adams forth. %his had no sooner mentioned the &iscovery of a stolen 'hild! and had uttered the word *trawberry! than .r. Wilson, with #ildness in his $oo s! and the utmost Eagerness in his #ords! begged to be shewed into the Room! where he entred without the least Regard to any of the 'ompany but !oseph, and embracing him with a 'omplexion all pale and trembling! desired to see the .ar on his 1reast; the "arson followed him capering! rubbing his (ands! and crying out! 1ic est Buem Bu9ris, inventus est, :c. !oseph complied with the Request of .r. Wilson, who no sooner saw the .ar ! than abandoning himself to the most extravagant Rapture of "assion! he embraced !oseph, with inexpressible Extasy! and cried out in %ears of ?oy! . have discovered my 'on, . have him again in my Arms . !oseph was not sufficiently appri5ed yet! to taste the same &elight with his )ather! 8for so in reality he was;9 however! he returned some #armth to his Embraces- 1ut he no sooner perceived from his )ather+s Account! the Agreement of every 'ircumstance! of "erson! %ime! and "lace! than he threw himself at his )eet! and embracing his 2nees! with %ears begged his 1lessing! which was given with much Affection! and received with such Respect! mixed with such %enderness on both sides! that it affected all present- 1ut none so much as $ady %ooby, who left the Room in an Agony! which was but too much perceived! and not very charitably accounted for by some of the 'ompany. '(A". CVI. %eing the last. .n which this true 1istory is brought to a happy Conclusion. -anny was very little behind her !oseph, in the &uty she exprest towards her "arents; and the ?oy she evidenced in discovering them. 4ammar Andrews iss+d her! and said she was heartily glad to see her- 1ut for her part she could never love any one better than !oseph. 4affar Andrews testified no remar able Emotion! he blessed and issed her! but complained bitterly! that he wanted his "ipe! not having had a #hiff that .orning.

.r. %ooby, who new nothing of his Aunt+s )ondness! imputed her abrupt &eparture to her "ride! and &isdain of the )amily into which he was married; he was therefore desirous to be gone with the utmost 'elerity- And now! having congratulated .r. Wilson and !oseph on the &iscovery! he saluted -anny, called her *ister! and introduced her as such to Pamela, who behaved with great &ecency on the ,ccasion. (e now sent a .essage to his Aunt! who returned! that she wished him a good ?ourney; but was too disordered to see any 'ompany- (e therefore prepared to set out! having invited .r. Wilson to his (ouse! and Pamela and !oseph both so insisted on his complying! that he at last consented! having first obtained a .essenger from .r. %ooby, to acquaint his #ife with the /ews; which! as he new it would render her completely happy! he could not prevail on himself to delay a moment in acquainting her with. %he 'ompany were ranged in this manner. %he two old "eople with their two &aughters rode in the 'oach! the *quire! .r. Wilson, !oseph, "arson Adams, and the "edlar proceeded on (orsebac . In their way !oseph informed his )ather of his intended .atch with -anny; to which! tho+ he expressed some Reluctance at first! on the Eagerness of his *on+s Instances he consented! saying if she was so good a 'reature as she appeared! and he described her! he thought the &isadvantages of 1irth and )ortune might be compensated. (e however insisted on the .atch being deferred till he had seen his .other; in which !oseph perceiving him positive! with great &uty obeyed him! to the great delight of "arson Adams, who by these means saw an ,pportunity of fulfilling the 'hurch )orms! and marrying his "arishioners without a $icence. .r. Adams greatly exulting on this ,ccasion! 8for such 'eremonies were .atters of no small moment with him9 accidentally gave *purs to his (orse! which the generous 1east disdaining! for he was high of .ettle! and had been used to more expert Riders than the 4entleman who at present bestrode him- for whose (orsemanship he had perhaps some 'ontempt! immediately ran away full speed! and played so many antic %ric s! that he tumbled the "arson from his 1ac ; which !oseph perceiving! came to his Relief. %his Accident afforded infinite .erriment to the *ervants! and no less frighted poor -anny, who beheld him as he past by the 'oach; but the .irth of the one! and %error of the other were soon determined! when the "arson declared he had received no &amage. %he (orse having freed himself from his unworthy Rider! as he probably thought him! proceeded to ma e the best of his way; but was stopped by a 4entleman and his *ervants! who were travelling the opposite way; and were now at a little distance from the 'oach. %hey soon met; and as one of the *ervants delivered Adams his (orse! his .aster hailed him! and Adams loo ing up! presently recollected he was the ?ustice of "eace before whom he and -anny had made their Appearance. %he "arson presently saluted him very indly; and the ?ustice informed him! that he had found the )ellow who attempted to swear against him and the young #oman the very next day! and had committed him to 'alisbury 4oal! where he was charged with many Robberies. .any 'ompliments having past between the "arson and ?ustice! the latter proceeded on his ?ourney! and the former having with some disdain refused !oseph*s ,ffer of changing (orses; and declared he was as able a (orseman as any in the 2ingdom! re0mounted his 1east; and now the 'ompany again proceeded! and happily arrived at their ?ourney+s End! .r. Adams by good $uc ! rather than by good Riding! escaping a second )all. %he 'ompany arriving at .r. %ooby*s (ouse! were all received by him in the most courteous! and entertained in the most splendid manner! after the 'ustom of the old &nglish (ospitality! which is still preserved in some very few )amilies in the remote "arts of &ngland. %hey all past that &ay with the utmost *atisfaction; it being perhaps impossible to find any *et of "eople more solidly and sincerely happy. !oseph and -anny found means to be alone upwards of two (ours! which were the shortest but the sweetest imaginable. In the .orning! .r. Wilson proposed to his *on to ma e a Visit with him to his .other; which! notwithstanding his dutiful Inclinations! and a longing &esire he had to see her! a little concerned him as he must be obliged to leave his -anny- 1ut the 4oodness of .r. %ooby relieved him; for he proposed to send his own 'oach and six for .rs. Wilson, whom Pamela so very earnestly invited! that .r. Wilson at length agreed with the Entreaties of .r. %ooby and !oseph, and suffered the 'oach to go empty for his #ife. ,n 'aturday /ight the 'oach return+d with .rs. Wilson, who added one more to this happy Assembly. %he Reader may imagine much better and quic er too than I can describe! the many Embraces and %ears of ?oy

which succeeded her Arrival. It is sufficient to say! she was easily prevailed with to follow her (usband+s Example! in consenting to the .atch. ,n 'unday .r. Adams performed the *ervice at the *quire+s "arish 'hurch! the 'urate of which very indly exchanged &uty! and rode twenty .iles to the $ady %ooby*s "arish! so to do; being particularly charged not to omit publishing the 1anns! being the third and last %ime. At length the happy &ay arrived! which was to put !oseph in the possession of all his #ishes. (e arose and drest himself in a neat! but plain *uit of .r. %ooby*s, which exactly fitted him; for he refused all )inery; as did -anny li ewise! who could be prevailed on by Pamela to attire herself in nothing richer than a white &imity /ight04own. (er *hift indeed! which Pamela presented her! was of the finest 2ind! and had an Edging of $ace round the 1osom; she li ewise equipped her with a "air of fine white %hread *toc ings! which were all she would accept; for she wore one of her own short round0ear+d 'aps! and over it a little *traw (at! lined with 'herry0coloured *il ! and tied with a 'herry0coloured Ribbon. In this &ress she came forth from her 'hamber! blushing! and breathing *weets; and was by !oseph, whose Eyes spar led )ire! led to 'hurch! the whole )amily attending! where .r. Adams performed the 'eremony; at which nothing was so remar able! as the extraordinary and unaffected .odesty of -anny, unless the true 'hristian "iety of Adams, who public ly rebu ed .r. %ooby and Pamela for laughing in so sacred a "lace! and so solemn an ,ccasion. ,ur "arson would have done no less to the highest "rince on Earth- )or tho+ he paid all *ubmission and &eference to his *uperiors in other .atters! where the least *pice of Religion intervened! he immediately lost all Respect of "ersons. It was his .axim! %hat he was a *ervant of the (ighest! and could not! without departing from his &uty! give up the least Article of his (onour! or of his 'ause! to the greatest earthly "otentate. Indeed he always asserted! that .r. Adams at 'hurch with his *urplice on! and .r. Adams without that ,rnament! in any other place! were two very different "ersons. #hen the 'hurch Rites were over! !oseph led his blooming 1ride bac to .r. %ooby*s 8for the &istance was so very little! they did not thin proper to use a 'oach9 the whole 'ompany attended them li ewise on foot; and now a most magnificent Entertainment was provided! at which "arson Adams demonstrated an Appetite surpri5ing! as well as surpassing every one present. Indeed the only "ersons who betrayed any &eficiency on this ,ccasion! were those on whose account the )east was provided. %hey pampered their Imaginations with the much more exquisite Repast which the Approach of /ight promised them; the %houghts of which filled both their .inds! tho+ with different *ensations; the one all &esire! while the other had her #ishes tempered with )ears. At length! after a &ay past with the utmost .erriment! corrected by the strictest &ecency; in which! however! "arson Adams, being well filled with Ale and "udding! had given a $oose to more )acetiousness than was usual to him- %he happy! the blest .oment arrived! when -anny retired with her .other! her .other0in0law! and her *ister. *he was soon undrest; for she had no ?ewels to deposite in their 'as ets! nor fine $aces to sold with the nicest Exactness. @ndressing to her was properly discovering! not putting off ,rnaments- )or as all her 'harms were the 4ifts of /ature! she could divest herself of none. (ow! Reader! shall I give thee an adequate Idea of this lovely young 'reature; the 1loom of Roses and $illies might a little illustrate her 'omplexion! or their *mell her *weetness- but to comprehend her entirely! conceive Aouth! (ealth! 1loom! 1eauty! /eatness! and Innocence in her 1ridal01ed; conceive all these in their utmost "erfection! and you may place the charming -anny*s "icture before your Eyes. !O'&P1 no sooner heard she was in 1ed! than he fled with the utmost Eagerness to her. A .inute carried him into her Arms! where we shall leave this happy 'ouple to en7oy the private Rewards of their 'onstancy; Rewards so great and sweet! that I apprehend !oseph neither envied the noblest &u e! nor -anny the finest &uchess that /ight. %he third &ay! .r. Wilson and his #ife! with their *on and &aughter returned home; where they now live together in a *tate of 1liss scarce ever equalled. .r. %ooby hath with unprecedented 4enerosity given -anny a )ortune of two thousand "ound! which !oseph hath laid out in a little Estate in the same "arish with his )ather! which he now occupies! 8his )ather having stoc +d it for him;9 and -anny presides! with most excellent .anagement in his &airy; where! however! she is not at present very able to bustle much! being! as .r. Wilson informs me in his last $etter! extremely big with her first 'hild.

.r. %ooby hath presented .r. Adams with a $iving of one hundred and thirty "ounds a Aear. (e at first refused it! resolving not to quit his "arishioners! with whom he hath lived so long- 1ut on recollecting he might eep a 'urate at this $iving! he hath been lately inducted into it. %he "edlar! besides several handsome "resents both from .r. Wilson and .r. %ooby, is! by the latter+s Interest! made an Excise0man; a %rust which he discharges with such ?ustice! that he is greatly beloved in his /eighbourhood. As for the $ady %ooby, she returned to London in a few days! where a young 'aptain of &ragoons! together with eternal "arties at 'ards! soon obliterated the .emory of !oseph. !O'&P1 remains blest with his -anny, whom he doats on with the utmost %enderness! which is all returned on her side. %he (appiness of this 'ouple is a perpetual )ountain of "leasure to their fond "arents; and what is particularly remar able! he declares he will imitate them in their Retirement; nor will be prevailed on by any 1oo sellers! or their Authors! to ma e his Appearance in 1igh,Life. -. .'.