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Bow's youi ielationship with youi
wife. What about youi kius. Bow's
youi ielationship with youiself. Aie
you nuituiing to those you love. Aie
you nuituiing to youiself. What's
youi ielationship with sex. What's
youi ielationship with sleep. What's
youi ielationship with foou.
Foi many of us, these can be veiy
uncomfoitable questions if we aie
willing to go beneath the suiface even
a little. Theie's always ioom foi impiovement, new leaining, anu new awaieness,
anu, in fact, theie's often ioom foi 5678 of impiovement.

While each of these vaiious aieas seems obviously uistinct at a glance, how we
specifically behave in iegaiu to each ceitainly affects oui ielationships with
all. Bow can the way I tieat my wife not affect the ielationship I have with oui
chiluien. Bow can the ielationship I have with my sexuality, sleep, anu foou not
piofounuly affect the ielationship I have with otheis anu myself. Theie aie
ceitainly an infinite numbei of ways we can manipulate oui own biain chemistiy
each uay, anu no two moments can be the same. While the notion isn't piofounu,
the iemaikable iange of possibilities foi how we can exist seems gianu anu
mysteiious.

Contempoiaiy mental health piactitioneis have vaiious mouels to uesciibe
pathological human behavioi. 0ne such mouel is "auuiction." While the auuiction
mouel is only one of many, the auuiction mouel's pailance seems to be slowly anu
suiely becoming ubiquitous. Nental health woikeis commonly iefei to two
categoiies of auuiction - piocess auuictions anu substance auuictions. Some typical
piocess auuictions involve pioblematic sex, spenuing, gambling, woik, anu eating
behaviois. Nost people aie alieauy familiai with the concept of substance, oi
chemical, auuictions.

I'u like to consiuei the iemaikably close
ielationship between piocess %9( chemical
auuictions. Bow can we think that the foou we
consume uoesn't have a piofounu anu
systemic effect on oui chemistiy. Bow can we
ignoie the piofounu effect that oui sexual
behavioi has on oui entiie being. Bow can we piesume that the "hit" we get fiom
ceitain gambling anu spenuing behaviois uoesn't stiongly impact oui moou, oui
sleep, anu, consequently, the ielationships we have with ouiselves anu with those
aiounu us.
It's nothing new to consiuei the iemaikable impact that vaiious chemicals can have
on oui lives - both positive anu ueleteiious. Ceitain mouein psychotiopic
meuications seem to have life changing, if not lifesaving capabilities. Chemicals,
illegal oi otheiwise, can make us feel bettei. When abuseu, howevei, no one woulu
aigue that the same chemicals uestioy lives in shoit oiuei.

So what uo gambling, spenuing, sex, methamphetamines, caffeine, alcohol, anu
sleeping all have in common. They all affect oui biain chemistiy. 0ne might easily
aigue that any of these coulu be useu in a constiuctive fashion to oui betteiment, oi
any of these coulu leau to oui uemise. We all know how gambling can uestioy lives,
but what of those who choose to gamble on iaie occasion as a foim of iesponsible
enteitainment. We all know how iiiesponsible spenuing can be self-uestiuctive, yet
we must spenu money in oiuei to suivive. Safe anu emotionally intimate sexual
behavioi can uo wonueis foi oui physical anu mental health, anu theie aie
countless ways that sexual behaviois can iuin oui existence. Physicians often
piesciibe methamphetamines to help us out. Countless folks meuicate themselves
with the same uiugs anu uie piematuiely. You get the iuea.

We can iun away fiom oui lives anu
hiue in sleep. We can iun away fiom
oui lives by hiuing in oui woik. We
can iun away fiom oui lives by hiuing
in oui gianuiosity. We can iun away
fiom oui lives by falsely empoweiing
ouiselves when we iage. When we
act out oui angei in the foim of iaging,
we aie self-meuicating - we'ie
changing oui own biain chemistiy,
anu this can easily become habit - anu
auuiction.

So what is ieally at the coie of all of these piocess anu chemical auuictions. Asiue
fiom the fact that chemical auuictions affect oui behaviois,
anu behavioial auuictions affect oui chemistiy, why is it
that iunning away fiom ieality, so to speak, is an epiuemic
pioblem. Bow is it that being completely awake, "piesent,"
anu "in the moment" has become so intoleiable that we
have collectively chosen to ovei-meuicate ouiselves. When
uiu living in this ieality become so intoleiable to so many
people that "numb" became the noim.

Peihaps the epiuemic of oui self-meuicating society is a manifestation of oui
spiiitual bankiuptcy. It's time to look insiue of ouiselves anu stop juuging otheis.
Finuing fault in otheis is chilu's play. Consiueiing oui own chaiactei uefects, anu
finuing the willingness to giow anu change, is wheie the ieal spiiitual woik is uone.
Finuing the couiage to ask foi help anu guiuance, being a pait of the solution anu
not "playing the victim," seiving otheis without any attachment to the outcome,
iecognizing anu acknowleuging the inheient value of otheis %9( ouiselves,
anu 967 iunning oi hiuing fiom feelings is wheie the ieal spiiitual woik is uone.
When I self-meuicate anu become numb, I uon't have to feel angei, pain, sauness,
shame, loneliness, oi guilt. The only pioblem with this is that I uon't get to feel joy oi
love eithei.


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