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Born and raised in Brighton, Jeff Funnell left school at sixteen and joined a London insurance company.

After a series of junior positions over the next ten years, he joined a Lloyds bro ing firm and !or ed as a bro er in the non"marine mar et until his eventual retirement some thirty"eight years later.

#his !or is dedicated to my grandson #oby, !hose arrival in $%&& inspired me to create something that might last a bit longer than ' do.

Jeffrey Funnell

SIMON BLUNT THE TRAINEE

(opyright Jeffrey Funnell #he right of Jeffrey Funnell to be identified as author of this !or has been asserted by him in accordance !ith section )) and )* of the (opyright, +esigns and ,atents Act &-**. All rights reserved. .o part of this publication may be reproduced, stored in a retrieval system, or transmitted in any form or by any means, electronic, mechanical, photocopying, recording, or other!ise, !ithout the prior permission of the publishers. Any person !ho commits any unauthori/ed act in relation to this publication may be liable to criminal prosecution and civil claims for damages. A (', catalogue record for this title is available from the British Library. All characters appearing in this !or are fictitious. Any resemblance to real persons, living or dead, is purely coincidental. '0B. -)* &*1-23 1-$ $ !!!.austinmacauley.com First ,ublished 4$%&15 Austin 6acauley ,ublishers Ltd. $7 (anada 08uare (anary 9harf London :&1 7LB

,rinted and bound in ;reat Britain

Ac no!ledgments
' am indebted to my good friend and one"time !ine"drin ing companion ,atric 6 Ardis, trial la!yer based in 6emphis, #ennessee, !hose no!ledge and !or on the behaviour of suspects, and the detection of deceit, as described in Bad Lies In Business 4(omer, Ardis and ,rice5, 6c;ra!"<ill, 6aidenhead, &-**, ' dre! on for chapter $2.

Chapter 1
#he London insurance firm of .athan <enry !as no!n in the Lloyds mar et as a specialist, or niche bro er. #his !as because of their preference for areas of business that generated the highest revenues. #hey !ere founded in the first decade of the t!entieth century by a man of the same name, no! long since departed. #he current chairman, and major shareholder, !as Brian ,eterson. Already a millionaire by the age of forty, but no! in his mid"sixties, ,eterson !as an astute boss, slightly eccentric, demanding of his senior staff, but generously supportive of everyone. <is office door !as al!ays open to any staff member !ho needed guidance and, !hen increased commitment !as re8uired, he preferred the carrot rather than the stic . <e drove an old London taxi around to!n, imagining he !ouldnt get tic eted !henever he par ed !here he shouldnt. <is deputy !as minority shareholder and managing director =obert 9oodhead. ,eterson and 9oodhead often disagreed, sometimes 8uite vociferously on matters of policy and direction but despite themselves, they had managed to run the company very successfully for over t!enty years. 9oodheads inclination !as for the stic , not the carrot. =eporting to them !ere the operating divisions, six in all, specialising in marine cargo, yachts, aviation, oil and gas, reinsurance and international property. :ach divisional head !as a main board director and minority shareholder. #here !ere no outside shareholders. #he total staff count !as t!o hundred and forty"one, soon to be increased by one, due to the arrival of eighteen"year"old school"leaver 0imon <enry John Blunt. <e !as to be a trainee bro er. 0imon !as from Brighton. <e lived a couple of miles from the centre of to!n in an area no!n as 9estdene !ith his father John, an accountant, and mother Angela, a local magistrate and charity !or er. John Blunt had his o!n firm in

Brighton. <e and his son !ere members of 9est Brighton ;olf (lub and ever since 0imon !as t!elve, they had played most !ee ends. <e !as not a typical teenager. <e did have a fe! friends, but not the sort that !ould hang around in the centre of to!n and, generally spea ing, he !as al!ays !ell turned out and smartly dressed !hen he needed to be. <e had dated a couple of girls from school on and off, but nothing serious. .o!, though, he !as 8uite interested in seventeen"year"old :mma from <ove, daughter of ;eorge (laremont, !ho !as a senior civil servant in the Foreign >ffice. #he (laremonts !ere also members of 9est Brighton ;olf (lub and ne! the Blunts !ell. +aughter :mma !as a beginner at the game and !as ta ing lessons from the club professional. ;olf !as 0imons principal leisure activity and his passion, though he also excelled at cric et and tennis. Both father and son !ere single"figure handicap golfers and their respective aspirations !ere to become club captain and club champion. Blunt junior !as still clinging to a childhood dream that one day he !ould become a professional, but realistically he !as not 8uite good enough for that. 0imon did not do very !ell at school, a local co" educational establishment called ?arndean, !hich at one time used to be a grammar school. <e had been popular !ith the other pupils because of his sporting s ills, but not !ith the staff. #hose !ho taught him regarded him as a bit la/y, just doing enough to get by, but no more. <is number one critic !as long"serving deputy head <erbert ;orringe, no!n to the entire school as @Jaffa. .obody could really remember !hy, except ;orringe did rhyme !ith orange. >ther staff members used it to his face, pupils behind his bac . <e !as a member of the same golf club as the Blunts, but not nearly as good at the game. #his !as the main reason for his aversion to, and constant criticism of, the younger Blunt !ho !as considerably better. Jaffa had a reputation for fiddling his handicap higher than it should be so as to improve his net scores and achieve better results in club competitions, but he !as pretty bad any!ay, so no one bothered to ta e much notice. For the most

part, he and 0imon chose to ignore each other in the clubhouse, but in school it !as a different story. ABlunt you are a layabout,B Jaffa had once said. ACour geography grades this year ma e me !onder ho! you ever manage to find your !ay to school. Just muddling through !ill not do.B A=eally. 'ts !or ed for you all these years,B thought 0imon, !isely choosing to eep it to himself. A.o 0ir,B !as !hat he actually said, emphasising the @0ir. 0imon had scraped a handful of ;(0: @> levels and had stayed on for his @A levels, the results of !hich !ere not yet no!n. <e !as not expecting grades good enough for a university education, !hich pleased him rather, since he had no !ish to prolong his academic agony any further. 6aths !as his !orst subject, !hich probably excluded him from joining his fathers accountancy firm, so he made the decision to loo for suitable employment else!here. <e had seen the job at .athan <enry advertised in The Independent and decided to apply, hoping he could bring his school days to an end as soon as possible. After @A levels !ere finished and the results !ere a!aited, the school timetable !as abandoned and daily life !as a little more hapha/ard. #hus it !as not difficult for him to absent himself for a day to go for his intervie!. At the offices of .athan <enry he had met Lynne ;reen, director in charge of human resources !ho, after a series of general 8uestions, as ed specifically about his academic achievements. A' have just finished sitting three @A levels but, of course, ' do not yet have the results,B he explained. A' am, though, 8uite confident that ' did the best ' possibly could and that ' shall not be disappointed !ith the grades. #hey !ill be a fair reflection of the !or ' put in during the past t!o years.B #hirty minutes later, !hen the intervie! !as over, Lynne ;reen said, A' shall !rite to you in a fe! days, 0imon, but before you go, 'd li e to introduce you to the person you !ill be reporting to, if !e decide to offer you the job.B 0he opened her office door and in came a middle"aged lady !ho !as introduced as 6rs Jac8ueline 9hitehouse. 0he !as chief bro er in the division dealing !ith international

property. <er proportions !ere ample and she !as some!hat taller than 0imons five feet seven inches. 0he !as dressed in a smart business suit and exuded an air of great authority. A<ello,B she said A'm Jac ie. :verybody calls me 6ary.B <er voice !as loud, deep and piercing and she had a very prominent coc ney accent. A' hear you play golf,B she boomed. AAre you any goodDB A'd li e to improve a bit,B he said diplomatically. A9hat do you play offDB AActually its three,B he offered mee ly. A.o! that is good,B she said, smiling. ACoure from Brighton ' understandDB ACes, thats right,B replied 0imon. A#ell me, ho!s that ne! football stadium that everyones tal ing aboutDB A>h yes, the Amex. 'ts absolutely a!esome. ' !ent there for the opening game, but golf ta es up my !ee ends most of the time.B A'm a 9est <am supporter. ;o to every home game. 9ell its nice to meet you,B she said, and !ith that she left. 'ntervie! over, he found his !ay bac to London Bridge 0tation, not really able to judge the li ely outcome. >n the one hand, the 8uestions seemed a bit bland but on the other, !hy !ould they bring in his potential boss if they !ere going to turn him do!nD >n the 9ednesday of the follo!ing !ee , and six days before the official end of the school summer term, he received a letter offering him the job and as ing him to start the follo!ing 6onday. <e sent his letter of acceptance by return and decided not to ma e any further appearances at school. >n the 0aturday before his first full day of gainful employment, he !ent to the golf club. #here !as just one other person in the changing room. 't !as Jaffa. ABlunt,B he yelled, A' didnt see you in school these last t!o days.B A#hats because ' !asnt there,B replied 0imon confidently. AAnd from no! on its 6r Blunt.B

A9hatDB screamed Jaffa. A.o! listen EB A.o, you listen, Jaffa.B Jaffas face seemed to change colour in an instant. A' left school last 9ednesday. 'm over eighteen, so you can no! call me 6r Blunt. As of 6onday ' shall be a Lloyds bro er,B he added, carefully omitting the !ord @trainee. A9hatDB roared Jaffa. ACoure joining that bunch of idle, thieving, good"for"nothing scroungersD #hat load of self" justifying, toffee"nosed, con"menD 9ell, at least youve found some!here that perfectly suits your talents. And at least !e !ont have to put up !ith you at school any more. Leaving is your best contribution yet.B AAs soon as 'm earning more than you, 'll let you no!,B retorted 0imon. A0houldnt be too long. And by the !ay, isnt it time your handicap !as adjusted do!n!ardsD Cou !ont get so many points then, !ill youD ' must have a !ord !ith the committee.B Jaffa left the room, fuming. 0imon !as smiling, but 8uietly pondering the disparaging reference to Lloyds. 'f this perception turned out to be !ide"spread, it !as something he !ould have to be a!are of and careful about. ,erhaps his father !ould no!. #hat evening he !as able to raise the Lloyds issue at home. ACes,B said 0imons father, A' do remember something about this. About fifteen or so years ago, it !as discovered that certain under!riters had been feathering their o!n nests. #here !ere several complicated scenarios, but the gist of it !as that profitable business !ent one !ay and unprofitable business another. #he good business !as channelled into syndicates belonging to the under!riters and their buddies, !hile the bad business !as left to the ordinary members, or names, as they are no!n. #here !ere bribes floating around, offshore facilities and all inds of other shenanigans. 9hen the bad catastrophe losses accumulated, as they do every four or five years, many outside investors lost vast sums of money, including their houses. 't !as a huge !orld"!ide scandal.B

A<o! did they get a!ay !ith itDB AFor the most part they didnt. #he !rongdoers !ere eventually caught and prosecuted !herever possible. >thers !ere expelled, never to !or again. #he losses abated for a !hile and Lloyds slo!ly recovered. =emember that each syndicate is a legally constituted entity in its o!n right and can transact !hatever insurance business it li es, subject to the overall rules of governance. Lloyds is regulated by an act of parliament, but it is merely a place in !hich to trade. A bit li e the 0toc :xchange.B A0o is it ancient history no!DB 0imon as ed. A' suppose so. And ' thin the constitution of Lloyds !as restructured so as to prevent anything li e that happening again. #heres still a lot of cronyism, bac "scratching, special favours for friends and all that stuff, but the regulatory environment is tight no! and malpractice on that scale is practically impossible. #he syndicate structure remains, but much of the capital is no! corporate rather than individual. 9hy do you as DB A>h, its just something that Jaffa said !hen ' told him. ' thought 'd chec it out.B A9ell Jaffas right, in a !ay, but out of date. 't !as the general vie! at the time but most people have forgotten about it no!.B John Blunt !as an early starter. #hus he !as able to deliver 0imon to Brighton 0tation in time for the ).3$a.m., !hich !ould get him to London Bridge at *.1&a.m., all being !ell. #he evening journey home from Brighton 0tation !ould have to be by public transport, as his fathers day !ould have long since finished, but the bus service out to 9estdene !as good and fre8uent and his mother could al!ays pic him up if need be. 0o it !as that 0imon duly boarded the morning train on his first day. 0ince Brighton is at the beginning of the line, he got a seat but the train soon filled as it pic ed up passengers at all stations to <ay!ards <eath, then one more stop at :ast (roydon before it rattled into its final destination. From London Bridge it !as a fifteen minute !al to the offices of

.athan <enry at 3% 6ar Lane, :(3, !here he arrived just before -.%% a.m. and presented himself at reception. A'm here for 6rs 9hitehouse,B 0imon said to the receptionist, !ho !ithout loo ing up, lifted the telephone receiver and punched a number. After a fe! seconds she said, A6ary, your ne! man is here.B #urning then to 0imon, she said politely, A,lease ta e a seat and shell come and get you.B 9ithin a minute or t!o chief bro er Jac8ueline 9hitehouse bree/ed in and thrust out a hand. A<ello 0imon. 9elcome,B she said. A.ice and early, then.B ACes,B replied 0imon. A' get a lift to the station from my dad. <e starts early.B A;reat,B she said. AFollo! me.B 0imon duly follo!ed her, hardly able to eep up. #hey !ent to the nearest lift !hich too them to the third floor, then into an open"plan room !ith five des s. 0he loo ed at her !atch. A'ts just on nine ocloc . Lets have a chat before the others get here. >ur official start time is nine"thirty. 0taff !ho live in to!n tend to drift in about that time, then stay later in the evenings. ' come in from Basildon so ' li e to arrive early and get a!ay on time if ' can. .o! ' ta e it youre pleased to be here.B A>h yes,B said 0imon enthusiastically. ABut ' am a little surprised ' got the job.B A>F. #here !ere others under consideration, but there !ere three factors that influenced us in your favour. Firstly, the ans!er you gave about your @A level results.B A' didnt have them,B interjected 0imon. A:xactly. 9hat you said !as very good, yet !hen !e analysed it after!ards, you had given us no information at all. Just spin. 0ometimes thats precisely !hat !e have to do as bro ers. 0econdly, youre a golfer.B A>h, you !ant me to play golfDB he said, sho!ing surprise.

A.ot play, no,B she explained. ABut it tells us you are very familiar !ith eti8uette and manners and all that stuff. Lloyds is a place !here that still counts for something.B A' see,B he said. A#hen theres your nice cosy middle"class schooling and up"bringing. 9e li ed that. 9e felt you !ould fit in nicely. Lloyds is no longer a refuge for upper"class, public"school types. #heyre still here, of course, but there are as many of me no! as there are of them. 'm an :ssex girl, !ith virtually no academic achievements, but 'm street"!ise, 8uic "!itted and ' have a big mouth. ' dont li e it !hen 'm patronised and ' tend to over"react.B A<o! do you cope !ith eti8uette, thenDB as ed 0imon, trying to thin of an intelligent 8uestion. A.ot very !ell,B she replied. ABut youll need to see me in action.B #hey both laughed. A=ight,B she said, Ayou can stic !ith me for the first !ee then !ell go from there. #hings are typically busy. 9ere a bit li e jugglers trying to eep ten balls in the air all at once and everything has a deadline. 9e are a group of five, all bro ing in the =oom, thats the under!riting room at Lloyds, and !e are the engine room of the international property division. #he grafters. >ur divisional managing director, and the man ' ultimately report to, is a chap called .igel 9at ins, no!n as (ro!bar. <es opened more doors for this company than anyone !hos ever !or ed here. <e and his senior colleagues are responsible for client servicing and business production. #hey dont spend much time in Lloyds but theyre there if ' need them, !hen theyre not travelling. Almost all our business comes from overseas, so theyre a!ay a lot of the time. 9e are !holesalers, in other !ords !e !or for other insurance professionals, mostly foreign bro ers, by going into the mar et on their behalf. 9e share the commission, but !e deal mostly !ith big"tic et items, so our turnover is 8uite high. Bac office is centralised and processes paper"!or for all six operating divisions. >ur claims department functions in the same !ay.B

At that point, t!o smartly"dressed, fresh"faced young men burst in. 't !as just on -.3% a.m. A6orning,B they said, almost in unison, as they made their !ay to their des s. AAre !e all !ellDB ACes than s and good morning,B replied 6ary. ABy the !ay, this is 0imon Blunt !ho starts today. ' told you about him last !ee .B A>h yes,B one of them said. A;reat. #he golfer from Brighton.B #urning to 0imon, she said, A#hese t!o are James ,iper" Bingham and (raig <ughes.B #he former !as a tall, slim, hard"loo ing man in his early thirties, !hile the latter a short, plump, agreeable fello! in his late t!enties. #hey shared a flat together in Fensington. AJohn is our other bro er,B 6ary continued, Abut hes on holiday no! for t!o !ee s. <es effectively my deputy. +id you have a good !ee end guysDB ACes, ' !as invited to my uncles place in <ampshire for a shooting !ee end,B replied Jamie. A(ouldnt get there until 0unday, though, as a cro!d of us !ere at ;ood!ood on 0aturday.B A' !ent to ;ood!ood !ith them,B said (raig, timidly, Abut ' turned do!n the invitation to the shoot.B A;ood for youB, said 6ary. A9as it Gncle 0ir Andre!, the baronet, JamieDB she added in a moc ing voice. AAnd did you ill anything, or anyoneDB ACes it !as and no ' didnt,B he snapped. A't !as a clay shoot. <o! !as your !ee end thenDB A0hopping, cleaning, !ashing and ironing. +ont forget 'm a !ife and mother as !ell as your boss.B A<o! can !eDB mumbled Jamie. A>F guys, lets get the !ee started. Cou t!o have plenty to eep you going.B #hen turning bac to 0imon, she said A'll ta e you over to Lloyds shortly. Cou need to have a pass. #he general public are not allo!ed in so the tic et, as it is called, is of paramount importance. Cou must have it !ith you at all times. 've arranged a temporary one for you !hich !ell collect from reception and 'll then give you the guided tour.

Gnder!riting hours are from eleven"thirty to one and t!o" thirty to four"thirty, so !ell have some time. 've one urgent item to deal !ith this morning so you can tag along and see ho! ' get on. ' should have done it Friday afternoon but the under!riter cleared off at lunch time. 'll explain later.B

Chapter 2
6ary gathered a bundle of papers together and placed them in a thic , bro!n leather folder. 0imon noticed that it did not /ip up round its three open sides, but that it !as held together by t!o small straps that clipped over the front and one end. A#his is a slip case,B she explained. A9ell get you one in due course. Lets go.B #hey turned right out of the main door, up 6ar Lane into Fenchurch 0treet, then across the road into Billiter 0treet, left into Fenchurch Avenue and into Lime 0treet, !here 0imon got his first glimpse of the Lloyds building. 't !as a huge, odd" loo ing structure that seemed to be mostly opa8ue glass and stainless steel. #he lifts !ere on the outside. A9hen this place first opened,B explained 6ary, A!e used to say that Lloyds began in a coffee house and its no! in a percolator.B As they came to the main entrance, they passed a doorman in a red, full"length robe. A'ts !hat they used to !ear in the eighteenth century,B explained 6ary. A#hese guys are called !aiters. Coull also see chaps in navy"blue, tailed suits !ith red trimmings. #heyre the messengers.B #he reception des !as manned by three cler s and the area immediately behind it !as bloc ed by t!o more !aiters H heavy"loo ing chaps H !ho !ere there to deny access to anyone !ithout a tic et. 6ary !ent straight up to one of the receptionists. A'm from .athan <enry. Cou have a temporary pass for 6r 0imon Blunt, ' hope.B ACes. <ere it is,B she replied. A#han you. #his is yours, 0imon. 'ts valid for one !ee until !e get you a permanent one. Coull need to be photographed but !eve plenty of time for that. 't can all be done in t!enty"four hours. Lets go through.B

As they passed the t!o doormen, one said, A;ood morning, 6ary. ;ood morning, 0ir.B 't !as the first time 0imon had been called 0ir. >nce inside they made their !ay to the lo!er level under!riting floor. 't !as a huge area, dotted about !ith large heavy tables !ith high"bac ed benches either side. #he space above !as a vast atrium, around !hich !ere several galleries up to fifth floor level. Bet!een the ground and upper levels !as a complex series of escalators, the sides of !hich !ere made of see"through materials so that the !or ing parts !ere visible. #o!ards one end of the ground floor !as a heavy, dome" shaped !ooden structure supported by four columns. A large bell !as suspended from the underside of the roof under !hich sat a red"robed !aiter. 'n front of him !ere a microphone and a computer screen. A#his is the =ostrum,B 6ary explained. A't houses the Lutine Bell. 't used to be rung !hen there !as a major disaster or a recovery from one, once for bad ne!s, t!ice for good. 'ts not used much these days, really only for ceremonial reasons. #he only time !e hear it no! is on the Friday before =emembrance 0unday !hen t!o military bandsmen come in and play the Last Post on their bugles. 9hen things get going, !hich is about eleven"thirty, youll hear the constant calling of names over the loudspea er. #his is to enable bro ers to contact each other or for their offices to contact them. 'll sho! you ho! it !or s a bit later.B A.o!,B she continued, Alets find some!here to sit and 'll explain !hat ' have to do this morning. #he under!riter ' need !ont be here until at least eleven"thirty, so !e have a fe! minutes.B A#hey have a short day, then,B commented 0imon. A>h no,B she explained. A#heyve plenty to do in their offices beforehand. 9hile !ere eeping ten balls in the air, theyll have fifty. #hey only spend half their time in the under!riting room.B From her slip case she too out a document, consisting of several pages of lightly"coloured card, A1 in si/e, held

together by a ring binder. >n the front !as pre"printed the name .athan <enry. A#his is a bro ers slip,B said 6ary. A'ts the !hole basis of the contract. #his client is a hotel chain based in Australia and you can see here that the total amount of insurance is one hundred and eleven million Australian dollars, spread across fourteen locations. 'ts an annual policy due to be rene!ed tomorro! at a premium of eight hundred and thirty"six thousand, a slight increase from last year. #he client is not entirely happy and !ants more time to consider. <ere you can see the under!riters stamps. 9hen they participate, they stamp the slip and !rite the percentage they !ant. #he leader typically ta es the largest share, because he sets the terms, then the others follo! or not as they choose. #oday ' have to get the leader to extend the policy by thirty days, !hich he !ont !ant to do. <es called 6artin Jac son, no!n as the #ellytubby, in vie! of his shape. ' dont !ant him to no! that !ere loo ing else!here, so it !ill be a tric y conversation. ' must ans!er his 8uestions truthfully, other!ise ' !ill be formally reprimanded, but he doesnt need to no! everything. >nly !hat he as s. =ight, its time to get going.B #hey too four escalators up to the third gallery and !ended their !ay past several groups of people !ho !ere standing around chatting. 0imon noticed an increase in the noise level as the place began to fill up. A#ellytubbys box is over here,B said 6ary, shepherding 0imon to!ards one of the large tables. ABut hes not here yet.B ABoxDB 8ueried 0imon. ACesB, she replied. A#hats !hat the tables and benches are called. :ach syndicate has at least one. #he under!riter and his deputies position themselves at each of the corners !aiting for bro ers to bring the business to them. 6uch of the time there is a 8ueue to see them, so its important to get in here early. #heir support staff sit on the inside recording everything they do. #heyre called entry boys, except this ones a girl. 0hes called Jane.B A'f bro ers have to !ait around,B as ed 0imon, Aisnt that a bit inefficientDB

A'n some !ays, yes,B ans!ered 6ary. ABut then !e get to see the decision"ma er face to face !hich ma es up for it. :xcuse me a minute.B 6ary moved to!ards the girl busy entering data into a lap" top. A's #ellytubby coming this morningDB she en8uired firmly. A'f you mean 6r Jac son, hes on his !ay,B replied Jane, !ithout ta ing her eyes a!ay from her screen. A' no! !ho ' mean,B retorted 6ary, sharply. A fe! other bro ers !ere gathering round the box, identifiable to 0imon by their slip cases. 9ithin a short time a portly, round"faced, man !as spotted lumbering to!ards them. As he neared, the assembled group began 8uietly humming the #ellytubby theme, reaching a crescendo as he closed in on them and provo ing a sco!l. <e par ed himself at the corner of the box nearest to the !aiting bro ers and the girl moved to the inside position next to him. A9hos first then,B he yelled. A's it you, 6aryDB ACes me,B she said bris ly. A6artin, this is my ne! trainee 0imon Blunt. 'm sho!ing him the ropes this !ee .B ABad luc ,B he said turning to 0imon. A.o! !hat have you guys got for me todayDB A'ts my Australian hotels. #hey !ant more time to consider your increased rene!al premium. #hey have to get their management committee together to approve the order and that !ont be possible for a couple of !ee s due to other commitments.B A9ell, 6ary, its time your client got their committee and their act together. ' gave you my price !ee s ago. 9hat are they doingD #his is an important issue for us all and 'm surprised they cant be bothered to deal !ith it. ' bet theyre s!anning off and spending a lot of time on the beach.B A'ts !inter there no!,B said 6ary, calmly. A0o thats just not true, is itD And ' !ant a thirty day extension.B A9ell 'm not giving you one. #heyre playing for time. #heyre shopping around arent theyD ' just hope EB AListen, 0ir,B she interrupted, emphasising the 0ir. A#hey are a loyal client but other important issues are going on out

there. <ad you not increased the premium this year, rene!al !ould have been automatic. But you did, so it isnt.B A#he ans!ers still no,B he snorted. A#hats it, 6ary.B A.o it isnt. 'm staying here until you agree. ' really do need this extension.B A0till no. ;o and get me the order.B AListen, before you ma e your final decision, you should no! 'm under a lot of pressure here. =ene!al date is tomorro! and theyre already nine hours ahead so its almost midnight out there. #hat means their cover expires in a couple of hours.B A9ell, you should have thought of that before, 6ary. Coure a bit last minute, arent youDB A' did. ' tried to see you last Friday but you !ere s!anning off some!here. ' hope you !erent on a beach H the British public couldnt handle that.B A>F, >F,B he said, laughing. #hose !aiting nearby in the 8ueue !ere laughing too. A'f you can absolutely assure me that your client is not loo ing around 'll agree the extra time, but therell be a penalty charge for it if theres no rene!al.B A#han you 6artin. And yes, ' give you my !ord that my client is not loo ing else!here.B A.o! clear off,B said the under!riter as he initialled the short, !ritten agreement that 6ary had prepared. <e then handed it to his girl !ho photocopied it and returned it to 6ary !ithout removing the sneer from her face. 6ary and 0imon made their !ay do!n from the third gallery and returned to the ground floor, !here they found some!here to sit. A=ight, 0imon,B said 6ary. A9hat did you ma e of thatDB A<eavy stuff, ' thin ,B he ventured. AA bit touch and goDB ACes, ' suppose so. <e just !anted to give me a hard time because he enjoys it, but he couldnt really refuse in the end. <e no!s !hen ' call him 0ir ' mean business. #he relationship historically is one of master and servant, but under!riters cant function !ithout bro ers. #hey no! that. ' !as relieved to get his scratch, though.B A0cratchDB as ed 0imon, intrigued.

A>h, its the act of scra!ling their initials on something to signify agreement. ;oes bac to the days !hen they all used 8uill pens.B AAnd everyone around can hear !hats being discussed.B ACes. 0ometimes the under!riter !ill agree to a private meeting if its really confidential, but not for the ind of session !eve just had.B A>ne thing, though,B as ed 0imon !ith a serious loo on his face. A<e as ed you to assure him that the client !as not loo ing around and you did. Cou gave your !ord.B AAnd ' !as right,B said 6ary, laughing. A#heyre not " !e are. <e didnt as me !hether !e !ere.B A9o!, ' dont thin ' could ever do that,B said 0imon. ACou !ill one day,B she commented. ABut there are many different approaches a lot better than mine. Coull learn.B A9hat about the penalty chargeDB A0omething 'll have to tal him out of later. 'f ' do place the rene!al else!here that conversation !ill be a bit tric y,B she said. A.o! lets go and get you photographed, 0imon.B #hey too one of the lifts to the sixth floor and !ent into a small office fitted !ith camera and screen. 6ary presented a completed form to the receptionist, explaining that her ne! charge !as here for his first tic et. 0traight a!ay he !as photographed, his form !as processed and they !ere on their !ay in a matter of minutes. #he tic et !ould be ready for collection the next day. >nce bac on the ground floor, 6ary stopped at the =ostrum and !hispered something to the !aiter. A.athan <enry 9hitehouse,B !as immediately announced over the loudspea ers for all to hear, all over the building. A#hats ho! you contact me if you ever need to,B explained 6ary to 0imon. A>r theres a number you can phone from the office. #he caller !ill then add the !ord telephone.B A>F,B said 0imon. As it !as approaching lunchtime, they made their !ay bac to the office. At the corner of Fenchurch 0treet and 6ar Lane, 6ary stopped at a snac bar. A' normally get a sand!ich for lunch,B she said to 0imon. A's that >F for youDB

A>h yes, fine,B he replied. #hey !ent inside, at least as far as they could, since it !as choc full of customers. 't !as run by 'talians. 6ary !as immediately recognised and ac no!ledged by one of the counter staff. #urning to 0imon, she said AAny preferenceDB A.o, 'll have !hat youre having.B A#9>. (>=.:+. B=>9.. C:0. ,LA'.. #9'(:,B she yelled at the top of her rasping voice, startling everyone. 9ithin a fe! minutes her order !as being passed to her above the heads of the cro!d in front. 6ary and 0imon paid at the till and hurried bac to the office. A' thought !ed be there for ever. <o! did you get a!ay !ith thatDB as ed 0imon. A've been doing it for nearly t!enty years. 'ts a routine that most people are familiar !ith.B A' got everything except @Ces. 9hat !as thatDB A6ustard.B A9hat about all the big lunches !e hear aboutDB en8uired 0imon confidently. A>nly !hen guests are involved and in our case one of our directors must to be present. 9e have a constant stream of overseas visitors !ho need to be fed and !atered, so !e have our o!n dining room. And sometimes its necessary to entertain an under!riter !hen !e !ant to discuss more general issues. ' dont get invited very often, !hich 'm 8uite pleased about, but occasionally an under!riter !ill invite me out. ;enerally spea ing !e get on !ell !ith everybody, but !e do need to loo after our clients !hen theyre in to!n, or someone else might. #here are tens of thousands of bro ers and under!riters in this mar et and its very, very competitive. ' love it. 'ts the best job.B 0imon sat 8uietly, munching on his corned, bro!n, yes and !ondering !hat he had got himself into. <e couldnt imagine ever being able to handle things the !ay 6ary just had. >n the other hand, they seemed to !ant to train him to do that and seventeen thousand a year, minus the cost of his season tic et,

!as very acceptable indeed. Better ma e a go of it. #heres no !ay of muddling through this time.

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