Dear Ms.

Hofmann,
Class:
This semester of English has been a learning process for me and has been a different
approach to writing than I have previousl been taught. The following three forum postings that I
gave specific feedbac! on include times where I spo!e for m group also individuall. I en"o
giving feedbac! to peers, especiall if I feel li!e I can# have helped.
This first forum post is where I responded to $llison%s in&uir proposal according to the
points we were supposed to touch. I thin! that m feedbac! helped her and I !now that reading
hers and seeing what wor!ed for her her helped me with m own topic.
This second forum post I responded to 'hillip(s In&uir 'roposal also according to the
points we were given to review. I thin! that this feedbac! helped him to ma!e his topic clearer.
The
third
forum post I gave feedbac! to )ean(s portfolio. His was reall well organi*ed and it
helped me to fi+ mine, also I thin! that receiving m comment probabl made him feel more
confident about his portfolio.
, E+amples where I was given feedbac!:
This
forum
post was
of m
original
-ibliograph. The feedbac! $llison and m group gave me collectivel, helped me to edit and
create a wor!ing bibliograph for m in&uir paper.
This ne+t e+ample is the
letter $rianna wrote me after reading m first
In&uir draft.
Most of the
changes in
m ne+t draft were
because of what
$rianna suggested so I found what she
said e+tremel helpful and a !e part in m
writing process.
.Dear Micaela,
I found our paper reall interesting because 'rivac laws affects everone. I
thin! our intro paragraph is well put and ver thought out. The onl thing I would change in the
intro paragraph is the opening sentence. The intro itself gives a good definition of what ou are
going to go over and tal! about. I felt li!e after I read the first paragraph it reall helped me
understand what 'rivac laws are. I also reall li!ed the second paragraph and agree totall with
how technolog advancements are affecting everone%s privac. /ou cant post one thing on the
Internet without other people seeing and commenting on it. The third paragraph I would tr to
find a better wa to "ust change the sub"ect into pop culture. I do li!e the thought of focusing
more on pop culture and how privac laws affect them in multiple was. This shows how privac
laws can and will affect everone. I li!e the transition ou used to switch over into the
governments roll in privac laws. I feel li!e so far ou have a reall good start to our paper and
I en"oed reading what ou have so far. I thin! with a little more polishing ou will have a great
in&uir paper. 0ne thing ou can add more to our paper is adding our own interest and
e+perience in the paper. I felt li!e our citations were good and in good places throughout the
paper. /ou could ma!e the paper a little more conversational and add our own insight..
These are the three in class writings, the connection I see between the three are clearl
m topic as well as the topic of culture itself.
This first writing was m response after an activit we had in class. I thin! that this
activit was ver beneficial in directing m in&uir paper topic further.
1. .)peed Dating.2
.12 I would descirbe this .speed dating. e+perience as a good wa to get a &uic! preview of other
people(s topics with "ust enough information to be more in&uisitive about his or her topic.
,2 I would assess m wor!ing !nowledge on this topic as good because I was prepared and I
have alread done some research on the topic.
32 I did en"o tal!ing about m topic. M e+plaination was clearer and more concise each time
we switched partners. I thin! that I was able to gauge their interest based on the fact that the
each intentl listened and made comments afterwards.
42 I do not have an new ideas about what I am writing about, e+cept mabe on how I word what
I e+plain..
The second writing is from an article we read in class and responded to. I remember
reading this and finding it ver interesting. Culture itself is something that I en"o learning or
tal!ing about.
,. ./oung 'eople, T5, 5alues.2
.6hile values across cultures can differ greatl I thin! that there are man common themes in
the values such as religion based values and etc. Most interesting to me is that one action in one
culture could mean something totall different in another. M &uestion is what cultures are more
similiar.. ones that have been formed for centuries or ones that formed more recentl7.
This
third
writing is
from one
of our first
classes,
we were
as!ed to
bring
something
to the class
that
connects
us to a
culture. I
brought m old i'od to
signif m connection to 'op Culture. 'op culture is a theme I have stuc! with throughout the
semester.
0utside of Class:
-ased on what I see in m completed homewor! assignments I thin! that I was prett
invested in m coursewor!, however, there were times and assignments that I could have and
should have put more time, thought, and effort into.
This first writing is an e+ample of when I thought I had followed the assignment and
topic well but it turned out that I had focused too much on tring to ma!e an argument and m
topic was not broad enough. 86or!ing 9nowledge:: This assignment was as!ing for a response
to the preliminar research activit following -allenger pages 3323;. Here is where I began with
m original topic of papara**i. $t first I was loo!ing at an in&uir pro"ect li!e all of m other
writing pro"ects prior, as an argumentative piece. $fter turning this in and receiving feedbac! I
was able to change that.
1. $ papara**i is a person who(s "ob is to see! candid pictures if an .celebrit.. The
more scandalous or inappropriate the picture the capture the more mone the ma!e.
8$ papara**i(s <ob is important to pop culture because their pictures go to maga*ines and
people can see the trends that celebrities are setting. $ pap can also help a celebrities image b
sharing pictures that are not scandalous. 0n the other hand, papara**i can often be invasive and
go to e+treme measures of stal!ing to get a good picture. $lso, the can ruin a star(s image with
"ust one picture of the star ma!ing a bad decision.
Man celebrities have made efforts to end the papara**i or at least tame their e+treme
measures. Celebrities who are avid about this movement include 9ane 6est, Cameron Dia* and
man more. $ lot of celebrities with children concern for their safet and well being as well.
The dilemma is that while celebrities can achieve their high social status through
papara**i, the can also tear their entire career apart through the papara**i.:
,.Dialoguing w# and paraphrasing: .$. Choose 0=E of our sources >for our topic? to
wor! with. Choose 0=E fact or statement from the source >boo!, article, etc.? to dialogue
with >as we did in class last wee!?. @se CA pgs. 1B,21B3 to help. Tal! with the author of the
source: .&uestioning, agreeing, speculating, wondering, connecting, arguing.. Have the dialogue
in writing.-. Choose 0=E interesting, complicated, and#or relevant passage >short paragraph?
from a source for our pro"ect >same or different as for C1? and paraphrase it. 'aste the original
first, followed b our paraphrase.. This assignment helped me to paraphrase and use the
information I found in m research in m paper.
'rivac Daws:
$. )ource: http:##www.ntimes.com#,B13#1B#31#technolog#no2us2action2so2states2move2on2
privac2law.html7ErFB

Gact: The amount of access a school has to student data and how that interacts with the Aight2
To2 9now act.
-. 80ver two do*en privac laws have passed this ear in more than 1B states, in places as
different as 0!lahoma and California. Man lawma!ers sa that news reports of widespread
surveillance b the =ational )ecurit $genc have led to more support for the bills among
constituents. $nd in some cases, the state lawma!ers sa, the have felt compelled to act because
of the stalemate in 6ashington on legislation to strengthen privac laws.:
-asicall, most privac laws are outdated and have not made up for the digital advances in this
age, therefore, man new laws are being passed. 'rivac laws are being strengthened and are not
as loose as the used to be.
3.Multiple Deads: This assignment as!ed us to rewrite our intro paragraph 3 times in 3
different was. This activit helped me to develop a strong intro paragraph that covers all the
parts of a strong intro paragraph. This helped me to see all of the was and eventuall choose the
best wa to begin.
81. Throughout this In&uir paper I am going to be e+ploring the changes in 'rivac
Daws over the past 4B ears and the reasons behind these reforms. Ever person has their own
sense of what 8privac: is. )ome consider privac a right while others consider it a privilege.
'rivac laws come into place because, while in the Girst $mendment of the Constitution there is
the right to Greedom of the 'ress the government wants it to be used for the bettering of the
public rather than for e+posing individual%s intimate or inappropriate secrets. the official
definition of 'rivac Daws is that the are 8Aegulation or statute that protects a person(s right to
be left alone, and governs collection, storage, and release of his or her financial, medical, and
other personal information: >-usiness Dictionar 31 Mar ,B14?. 'rivac laws are in need of a
change because of the development in technolog over the past three decades as well as the
increase in 'opular Cultural >'op Culture? interest and the government%s steps to prevent events
such as terrorism.
,. 6hether we reali*e it or not, privac laws pla a role in our lives. $re ou comfortable that the
government has access to our private phone calls and emails7 6ere ou saddened b the
invasiveness in pop culture that ultimatel led to incidences such as 'rincess Diana%s death7
Can ou recall the short time when smart phones, tablets, and laptops were landlines, letters,
and tpewriters7 $ time where the internet and all the access to a person%s personal life was
not at our fingertips7 The ultimate &uestion I want to e+plore is how the prior &uestions have
added to the development of 'rivac Daws over the past 4B ears. There are acts and laws that
have been created to help protect a person%s privac, however, man are outdated or appl to
onl specific regions.
3. 'rivac Daws have been developed and in pla since 1H;4. )ince 1H;4 clearl a lot has
changed in our societ, our government, our technolog, and our lives essentiall. -ut, e+actl
how have these laws changed to become accustomed to life toda7 Technologicall spea!ing it
has become ever so eas to access personal information as well as to share it. The
development of the internet as well as mobile phones add to this ferventl. The Iovernment
has the abilit and perhaps reasons to access anone and everones personal conversations#
search histories. 'op culture, if not all cultures, all more dependent on the use of technolog
and access to personal information than ever.:
In&uir and m in&uir pro"ect:
The first e+ample from -allenger%s The Curious Aesearcher that helped me understand
about research and in&uir comes from Chapter 4, page 1JH and the section is titled 8Deciding
6hether to )a I.: This helped me because I have alwas been taught that when writing essas#
paper that I need to remove mself from the presence of them and reading this helped me to
reali*e that Girst 'erson can be used in formal writings as well as help them. I connects ou to a
piece and ma!es it more personal.
The second e+ample is
in Chapter 1, page ,J in the
section titled E+ercise 1.1:
-uilding an Interest Inventor,
)tep 1. 6hen we were
first told to thin! of topics to
write a paper on, as
alwas, I struggled to thin!
of anthing and that is the same
attitude that this section addresses
and helps to wal! through pic!ing a topic.
The third e+ample is in
Chapter 4, page 1;B, section titled
6riting a )trong Ending. 0ne of the &uestions I had on a draft of m in&uir paper was how to
end m paper. I have a hard time not writing tpicall fluff conclusion paragraphs and this piece
helped me to find a wa to ma!e m ending stronger and better. It points out that I do not even
need a 8conclusion,: but I could in fact end with a &uestion instead.
If I were
to teach this class I
would emphasi*e the ideas of not thin!ing of an in&uir
paper as the standard J paragraph essa we have been taught to write since the 4th grade. $lso,
that it is hard to brea! old habits and it is some what a leap of faith to stra from our comfort
*ones in writing but it is o!.
M 'ortfolio:
I thin! that I have pic!ed a prett good laout for m 'ortfolio, also 6eebl was a prett
eas site to navigate. I thin! that it is pleasing to the ee, as well as clear to what is on each page.
I also included some pictures on some of the pages to add a little life to it. I was concerned about
mabe having too man tabs but I thin! that having reall specific tabs will help a reader
navigate the site rather than have them searching through a few broad tabs.
$t the time when we were as!ed to submit our portfolio lin!s I had not reall edited the
site or personali*ed it so when our peers were as!ed to criti&ue them I received some harsh >but
sometimes the truth hurts haha? comments. I !new that there was wor! left to be done on m
portfolio but the comments helped me to specif precisel where.
I have used 6eebl to create a portfolio before so I had the general idea of where I was
going with this portfolio. I had to put a lot more documents and pictures into this one so it has
been a lot more time consuming than the one I did prior. In m ne+t e2 portfolio I thin! that I will
stic! with this same page laout but I will tr to use button lin!s, which is something I need to
learn how to do.
Doo!ing -ac! K Thin!ing $head:
The &uestions I posed in m Midterm Aeflection were: 1? How do I write research paper
without emphasi*ing so much on the argumentative part that I am used to7 M answer now is to "ust
loo! at the paper without thin!ing of it as an argument but as an in&uir. I struggled a lot with
something so simple and then it finall clic!ed that I do not have to write a two sided paper but I
can "ust write. ,? How should I go about changing m topic this late7 I learned that m topic was
too specific and then eventuall I figured that I could e+pand from papara**i invading privac to
"ust privac itself, this wa I still could tal! about papara**i but it opened up the opportunit to tal!
about more than "ust papara**i and ma!e it more interesting for the reader. 3?Is it worth changing
m topic this late7 It was definitel worth changing m topic so late because I feel li!e I was able
to write a reall well written essa with a lot more to tal! about than I began with. , &uestions that I
still have are: 1? How much research e+actl is needed in a researched based essa to actuall be
considered researched base7 ,? Does it still fall into a research paper categor if ou write based on
mostl general !nowledge7
I reall en"oed being in our class this semester and I appreciate all that I too! from being
in it.
)incerel,
Micaela Glowers