V

ol.

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ay 16
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Some serious concentration

Scotty shot-putter Dana Hughes gets set for her windup at Glasgows annual Top Ten Track & Field Meet
held last week. Dana currently holds the third best
heave in the state in the Class B ranks, a 356 mark
thrown at the Top Ten. Shes a fierce competitor,
says Scotty Volleyball Coach Lori Dailey, who

added, Ive got some big plans for her this fall. But
first things first. Hughes and the rest of the Scotty
tracksters play host to the District 2B Track & Field
Meet this Saturday, May 17th. Events get underway
at 9:00. Concessions are available. Come out and
watch some seriously good athletes in action.

FREE TREAT TUESDAY!

FREE POPCORN WITH EVERY PAID ADMISSION AT THE 7&9PM SHOWINGS

Another Legion Field CleanUp Day on a Sunny Saturday

All Babe Ruth and Reds American Legion baseball
players & parents are asked to show up at the Legion ball
field on Saturday, May 17th from 1-5 p.m.
We got in one day of our clean-up weekend but still
have things that need to be done, says Joan Thibault.
Please bring your shovels and rakes and whatever else
you may think will come in handy. Community members
are also welcome to lend a hand.

MAY 16 - 22

SHOWINGS
228-9239

www.polsontheatres.com

113 Min.

4:10PM
7:00PM
9:15PM
Rated PG: for
thematic material,
brief violence and
an accident scene
Cast: Dean Cain, Kevin Sorbo, David A.R. White, Shane Harper, Willie & Korie Robertson

Christian man Josh Wheaton finds his faith challenged on his first day of
Philosophy class by his professor. He begins class by informing students that
they will need to disavow, in writing, the existence of God or face a failing grade.
As other students begin scribbling the words God Is Dead as instructed, Josh
finds himself having to choose between his faith and his future. After offering
a nervous refusal, Joshs smug professor assigns him a daunting task: if Josh
will not admit that God is Dead, he must prove Gods existence by presenting
a well-researched, intellectual arguments and evidence ofver the course of the
semester and engage his professor in a head-to-head debate in front of the
class. If he fails to convince his classmates, he will fail the course.

123 Min.

4:00PM
6:50PM
9:20PM
Rated PG-13: for
intense sequences
of distruction,
mayhem and
creature violence
Cast: Aaron Taylor-Johnson, Ken Watanabe, Elizabeth Olson, Juliette Binoche, Bryan Cranston

This epic rebirth to Tohos iconic Godzilla, this spectacular adventure pits the
worlds most famous monster against malevolent creatures who, bolstered by
humanitys scientific arrogance, threaten our very existence.

DAILY CINEMAS: 4:00 & 4:10 PM - $5.75/PERSON

Gary & Janet Kolstad gift

$1 million to Montana Tech

Montana Tech alumni, Gary 85 and Janet 85

Kolstad, have gifted $1,000,000 to the university.
Gary Kolstad is the CEO of CARBO Ceramics
Inc. (NYSE: CRR), a global oilfield services technology
company providing industry leading production
enhancement products and services to increase the
recovery factor in oil and natural gas wells.
The proceeds from the Gary and Janet Kolstad
Endowment will benefit the Petroleum Engineering
Department and scholarships for petroleum
engineering students. During the 2014-2015 academic
year, the Kolstads Endowment will impact eight
students.
It is with great pride that Janet and I have
established the Gary and Janet Kolstad Endowment at
Montana Tech, noted Gary. We are inspired by the
students and graduates of Montana Tech and their
lifes journey from ordinary to extraordinary, and the
resulting impact they have in this world. Montana
Tech is well known in industry as the premier STEM
institution in Montana. Fundamentally, we believe
higher education is one of the primary tools needed to
continue to improve the competiveness and standard
of living, of both America and individuals. Education
always helps people understand the basics of what it
takes to be successful and responsible for their lifes
outcome.
Gary and Janet are longtime supporters of
Montana Tech, added Montana Tech Chancellor Don
Blackketter. This gift is significant not only for Gary
and Janet but for the university because it is the first
individual $1 million gift in Montana Techs history. I
want to thank Gary and Janet for their inspiring gift
and leadership.
continued on page 4

Were Giving Away 2 Red, White & Blue Planters A Day

from Friday, May 16th - Friday, May 23rd
Must Sign Up at the VFW to Enter starting Wednesday, May 14th

TOOL SALE
Saturday, May 17 th - All Day
Located at
the VFW
Parking Lot

Call Jolene Reyes

390-3871

ack!
A
$1 Plantshilere B Last!
They

Gift Certificates
Get Them W
Available

BUZZIFIEDS

Hours: 10am-6pm, 7days/week

*** Weather Permitting ***

Sounding good
for track on
Saturday
Tonight: Mostly cloudy, with a low around 42. North
northeast wind 5 to 8 mph.
Saturday: Mostly sunny, with a high near 68. Light and
variable wind.

Saturday Night: A 20 percent chance of showers after

midnight. Mostly cloudy, with a low around 46. East
southeast wind 6 to 8 mph.
Sunday: A chance of showers, then showers likely and
possibly a thunderstorm after noon. Partly sunny, with
a high near 71. East southeast wind around 8 mph.
Chance of precipitation is 70%.
Sunday Night: Showers and possibly a thunderstorm
before midnight, then a chance of showers. Low around
48. East southeast wind around 5 mph becoming calm
after midnight. Chance of precipitation is 80%.
Monday: A chance of showers, with thunderstorms also
possible after noon. Partly sunny, with a high near 67.
West wind 13 to 17 mph, with gusts as high as 23 mph.
Chance of precipitation is 40%.

Monday Night: A slight chance of showers and

thunderstorms. Partly cloudy, with a low around 43.
Tuesday: A slight chance of showers. Mostly sunny, with
a high near 65.

Tuesday Night: A slight chance of showers. Partly

cloudy, with a low around 43.
Wednesday: A slight chance of showers. Mostly sunny,
with a high near 66.
Wednesday Night: A slight chance of showers. Partly
cloudy, with a low around 44.

Thursday: A slight chance of showers. Mostly sunny,

with a high near 68.

BUZZ
Valley view home is having a community rummage sale,
bake sale & car wash: Saturday, May 17th, 8am-12pm. We would
like to see you there, our communitys support is appreciated! Money
raised goes to resident-centered projects. Valley view home - 1225
Perry Ln, glasgow.
BUZZ
Garage Sale: Saturday, May 17th, 7am-Noon. Thousand ft 1 old
fir lumber, antique baby chair, 8x10 braided rug, and much more! One
Walleye st., Fort Peck (above duck creek). 367-5339.
BUZZ
LARGE 2 FAMILY Garage Sale! Saturday, May 17th, 8:30am-3:30pm.
Home dcor, toys, books, baby clothes, etc., highchairs, baby-size 7
clothes, womens & mens clothes Small to 2XL. 129 Bonnie St.
BUZZ
Garage Sale: Friday, May 16th, 5pm-8pm; Saturday, May 17th, 8am-?
Everything but the kitchen sink! 340 4th ave north.
BUZZ
Job Opening: First Community Bank, Glasgow, has an opening for
a part time Teller with benefits. Apply at Job Service. eeo/aa
employer.
BUZZ
Eds storage: For Rent: One 12 x 10 Storage Unit open immediately
in Nashua. Eds Storage is For Sale. CALL 746-3366.
BUZZ
For Sale: Large dining room table, dark brown, 3 leaves, 6 chairs, $150
OBO. Dark brown china hutch, $200. Call 406-679-3866 or 228-4866.
BUZZ
COMMERCIAL BUILDING FOR SALE: 5,500 sq. ft. with storage.
Large shop, office, and nice 3 bedroom apartment with yard all in one
building. Large .62 acre lot with good Hwy 2 visibility. City sewer and
water. 275k. 228-2016.

Valley County Pioneer Museum Job Opening

Shoes - $110 .00

Trim - $40 .00

Garth Lenci
(406) 230-1009
Glasgow, MT
Cash Only Please

ORGANIZATIONS NEEDED
Valley County
Fair Commission
needs
FOOD VENDORS & BEER GARDENS
FOR THE FOLLOWING DATES:

May 31 & June 1 - Sand Drags, Mud Bog & Sat. Night Boogie
June 14 - Spring Derby
August 2-5 - Northeast Montana Fair
For more information contact Doris Ozark
367-5243 (after 7pm)
263-5243 or 230-0663

Gary & Janet continued from page 2

Gary and Janet represent extraordinary
individuals from ordinary upbringings that are
living extraordinary lives and providing incredible
levels of support, explained Montana Tech
Foundation President Joe McClafferty. I thank
them for their continued dedication to advance
Montana Tech. The petroleum students receiving
the awards from the Gary and Janet Kolstad
Endowment now have opportunities to live
extraordinary lives.
Janet (Tuss) is a native of Great Falls, MT
and started her career with ARCO Oil and Gas
Company. During her eight years with ARCO, she
served in several production operations positions
in California, Oklahoma, and Texas.

Gary is a native of Glasgow, MT and started his
career as a field engineer with Schlumberger. Serving
in numerous domestic and international leadership
positions in operations as well as marketing and
sales, Gary held positions with Schlumberger as
Vice President, Oilfield Services-U S Onshore and
Vice President, Global Accounts. His experience
allowed him the opportunity of working in North
America, Russia, Indonesia, and the Middle East.
In 2006, Gary was recruited by CARBO to be
their Chief Executive Officer. In the seven years
under his leadership, CARBO has more than
tripled in terms of revenue, profit and market
capitalization. CARBOS primary mission is to
improve production and recovery rates in oil
and natural gas reservoirs, by providing industry
leading technology through their Design, Build,
and Optimize the FracTM technology platform.
They are most widely known for being the worlds
largest supplier of high quality ceramic proppants,
which are used in the process of hydraulic fracturing
to stimulate oil and natural gas wells.
For his contribution to his career and his
community, Gary was awarded the Distinguished
Alumni Award from Montana Tech in 2002. He
currently sits on the Montana Tech Foundation
Board of Directors, the Montana Tech Petroleum
Department Industry Advisory Board and is a
Board Member for Spindletop Charities.
Gary and his wife Janet are generous
contributors to Montana Tech as members of
the Council of 600 and the Gary & Janet Kolstad
Endowed Scholarship.

VOTE KULCZYK for JUSTICE of the PEACE

My name is Ronnie Kulczyk of Glasgow, and I am running for Justice of the

Peace. I strongly believe there is a loop in the justice system and I plan to fix it.
I may not have the experience with the law, or background in the court systems
like some of my fellow candidates, but I strongly believe I am the right fit for
the job. Sometimes it isnt always best to have a background and experience;
we need new blood in that position with a clear outlook to change things.
My main goal is to be fair, I want to make sure that everyone is treated the
same. I have heard many times that someone was treated unjustly by the judge
because they werent liked or because of whom their family was. I myself know
how it feels to be judged by someone without them even knowing who I am or
what I believe.
I have lived in this community my whole life and love being a part of it. I
want to protect the citizens of this community and make it a safe place for
children to grow up in and become our future leaders. I have two children of
my own; they need a good example of how the justice system should work.
If you have any questions, concerns or suggestions, feel free to contact me
by phone, email or my Facebook page. My phone number is 263-2377 and
my email is flicks@nemont.net. My Facebook page is Ronald W Kulczyk for
Justice of Peace.

Fish & Wildlife Commission To

Consider Wolf Stamp Donation

Among a full agenda to consider at its May 22

meeting in Fort Peck, a late addition now includes
potential commission direction for a voluntary wolf
conservation stamp or decal for anyone to make a
contribution to Montana wolf management.
If approved, FWP would initiate rulemaking to
define a voluntary wolf conservation stamp and how
donated funds would be allocated to specific wolf
conservation efforts. That process would include
opportunity for public comment.
The commission meeting will begin at 8:30 a.m.
on May 22 at the Fort Peck Hatchery in Fort Peck,
277 Highway 117. The public may also participate via
video conference from FWP regional offices and FWPs
headquarters in Helena.
FWP ensures its meetings are fully accessible to
those with special needs. To request arrangements call
FWP at 406-444-3186.
The full agenda and additional information on the
scheduled topics may be found on the FWP website at
fwp.mt.gov, then click For Commission Information.
BEST COMMERCIAL LOCATION
20-923

CALL TODAY 228-2114

www.hellandagencyinc.com

Ideal commercial corner lot

location with 2.88 acres on
US Highway 2 and 8th Street
North in Glasgow, Montana.
Located between Shopko
and Scottie`s Car Wash, this
location is ideal for banks,
fast food services, o and
office
retail businesses. Some
business restrictions apply.
US Hwy 2 & 8th St N

Asking $450,000

Congratulations
Valley County
Graduates!
I wish you well in your future
endeavors, for your future is the
future of Valley County.
But please be responsible. As a pilot
for Stat Air Ambulance for the past 20
years, too often we have seen tragedy
around this time. DO NOT drink and
drive, DO NOT get in a vehicle with a
driver that is under the influence of
drugs or alcohol.
Be safe, buckle up,
and have a great summer.

Quality at a Fair Price

Your NE MONTANA

DRIVING

HEADQUARTERS
Come See Us Today!
NORTHEAST MONTANAS FORD HEADQUARTERS
Call Jerry, Josh or Norm 228-2141 866-528-2141
Check us out on the web for more great deals www.hilineford.net

THIS
N HT
DAYTH, IG 14
FRI
20
MAY 16

May 13th ~ May 16th, 2014

Guess the Bottle Caps for a
Chance to Win a FREE Ticket to
Blues and Brews!

TRIAL BY FIRE
Come Han
Out & Enjog
Some Live y
Music!

Starting at 9pm

your
get in on win!
chance to

We have a big glass jar full of bottle caps,

and all you need to do is stop in and write
down the number of caps you think the jar
contains, your name and phone number, and
you will be entered to win a FREE ticket to
Blues & Brews Fest this weekend!

Winner will be notified after 8pm on Friday, May 16th.

nnie City
Bo

es
Blu

en
Op
s
oor PM
D
c
4
usi
M
ive M
L
5P

ws
Bre
&
e
Liv c!
si
Mu

By
ial
Tr
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Fir

ng
uri
ea t

olt
tt H
Sco nd
Ba
F

irty
D er
Pow
Over 30 Micro Brews
Merchandise - Raffles
Wine Available!
Fred Wratislaw (inset above) blew into his old hometown of
Glasgow earlier this week in his tricked-out W140 Mercedes
S500 that he calls his BIG BAD BULLSHIPPER. The retired
truck driver says he took the parts of his semi to convert his
Mercedes into quite the eye catcher. It gets more attention

than the Wienermobile, he chuckled. In fact, some rich dude

with a 35-million dollar helicopter just had to have photos with
his black whirley-bird setting next to the black Bullshipper;
and then off they flew. Freds got the video on his smart phone
of the helicopter taking flight following the photo shoot!

S
SYSCO
SPONSOR
B.S. CENTRAL
CAPE AIR
KLTZ/KLAN
CREATIVE ELEMENTS
NEWTON MOTORS
EL COR DEL
GLASGOW COURIER
J&M DISTRIBUTING
REYNOLDS MARKET
COTTONWOOD INN
MIRROR IMAGE
BLUE ROCK BEVERAGE
FREE TRADER
EZZIES WHOLESALE

Saturday, May 17, 2014

AAA GLASS
Cottonwood Inn
HI-LINE COLLISION
ALLISON MOLVIG INSURANCE Glasgow Montana
NEMONT BEVERAGE
HI LINE FORD
$40 Presale
NORTHERN PRAIRIE AUTO
DALE PLUMBING & HEATING
$45 at door
JEFF COLE INSURANCE
GLASGOW DISTRIBUTORS
HELLAND LAW FIRM PLLC
ALL SEASONS HOME CENTER
SCOTTIE EXPRESS WASH
RED FOXX REAL ESTATE
FOOD SERVICES OF AMERICA
TRICIAS TRADER

Non-alcoholic beverages & complimentary

transportation available upon request
For more information:
Glasgow Chamber of
Commerce & Agriculture
Box 832
Glasgow Montana 59230
406-228-2222
chamber@nemont.net
www.glasgowchamber.net

LE EPAIR S
GUTO RNN&
A

OBITUARY

RVICE
WRECKER SE

Gladys Theo Jody Opheim

Gladys Theo Jody Opheim,
84, died Saturday, May 3, 2014, at
the Help for Health Hospice Home.
Memorial services will be held
at a later date with inurnment of
the ashes taking place at Lawndale
Cemetery with her husband in
Opheim, Mont. Cremation has
taken place under the direction of
Davis Funeral Home.
Jody was born June 26, 1929,
in Helena, Mont., the daughter
of James Paul Martin and Lorna
Belle Hallock.
She attended first and second
grade in Norris, Mont., third
through sixth grade in Great Falls,
seventh and eighth grades in
Portland, Ore, ninth through 11th
grades in Opheim, and 12th grade
in St. Ignatius, Mont., when she
received her GED in 1979. She also
attended Salish Kootenai College in
the 80s, studying early childhood
development course (Headstart).
On Sept. 1, 1946, she married
Rex ONeal Opheim in Glasgow.
She was of the Lutheran faith and
was a Sunday School teacher while
raising her family; four sons and one
daughter. She was a member of the
Eastern Star in Opheim, the Senior
Center in St. Ignatius (a quilter) and
was a member of the Riverton, Wyo.,
Senior Center (housing) socializing

53999
Hwy 2 W

Batteries Towing Repair

Call 228-2715 or 263-1249

Tangles

Salon

Hairstyles for All Ages

Cuts, Colors & Perms

Northwest Farm Credit Services

is seeking a crop insurance agent to
join their glasgow, mt office

(406) 853-5100

LeAnn Murnion
Cosmetologist

330 4th Ave S. Glasgow, MT

Riddle Time
with Red
Jody Opheim with her kids Jerry, Berney, Jim, Loni and Mike

and volunteering services.

Jody enjoyed quilting, painting
pictures, sewing clothes for family
and making quilts for seniors. She
had a passion for serving people.
She managed the ENCO Club
kitchen at the Radar Station in
Opheim, and was also a head cook
at Glasgow Air Force Base. She
managed the Legion Club kitchen
in Billings, was a Headstart teacher
and cook at St. Ignatius, and created
Learning flannelgraphs and stories
for Headstart. She also enjoyed
adventure such as snowmobiling,
camping and hot air ballooning.
She was a lifelong resident
of Montana until she moved to
Riverton in November, 2010, to live

near her daughter.

She was preceded in death by
her husband, Rex; and her parents.
Survivors include four sons,
Jerry Opheim and his wife, Vicki,
of Billings, Jim Opheim of Glasgow,
Mikel Opheim of Kalispell, and
Berney Opheim of Missoula; a
daughter, Loni Freese and husband,
Terry, of Riverton; 12 grandchildren;
21 great-grandchildren; and two
great-great-grandchildren.
Memorials may be made to
Help for Health Hospice in care of
the Davis Funeral Home, 2203 W.
Main Street, Riverton, WY 82501.
Online
condolences
for
the family may be made at
theDavisFuneralHome.com.

ATTENTION GLASGOW AREA IRRIGATORS

Wednesdays teaser: I am a nice word composed

of five letters, but the Romans would call me a
numbers. What word am I? Hint: The word is polite.
Answer: Civil.

Todays teaser: I cannot be seen, cannot be felt,

Cannot be heard, cannot be smelt.
I lie behind stars and under hills, And empty holes
I fill.
I come first and follow after, End life, kill laughter.
What am I?

Speaking of Mercedes...

On a golf tour in Scotland, Tiger Woods rents

a Mercedes S500 and drives into a petrol station in a
remote part of the Scottiesh countryside.

The pump attendant, who knows absolutely nothing
about golf, greets him in a typical Scottish manner
completely unaware of who the golfing pro is.

Top of the mornin toyer, sir says the attendant.
Tiger nods a quick Hello and bends forward to
pick up the nozzle. As he does so, two tees fall out of his
shirt pocket onto the ground.
Vhat be dose little sticks of wood? asks the
attendant.

Theyre called tees, replies Tiger.

Vell, vhat on dis Gods earth are dey for? inquires
the Scotsman.
Theyre for resting my balls on when Im driving,
says Tiger.

If dat dont beat all, says the big Scotsman, Dose
fellers at Mercedes tink of everyting!

Custom Carpentry Roofing Repairs Windows Doors Kitchens Baths

Call Shawn Beard 230-1025
Email: beardhi@gmail.com Licensed & insured Free Estimates

CLOSE TO GLASGOW!
These lots total 26,940 sq. ft. and
is a perfect level building site.
Cherry Creek Water association.
Call for more information!
Highway 2 West, Glasgow, MT

$55,000

#205
Offered by: Karen Waarvik, Broker/Owner

(406) 228-2525
www.redfoxxrealestate.com

NOW HIRING ALL POSITIONS!

Team Members, Servers,
Delivery Drivers, Management
Were looking for enthusiastic, fun and friendly people to
join our team. Competitive wages, flexible hours, and
great benefits all in a fun work environment!

APPLY ONLINE
TODAY!
www.jobs.pizzahut.com
619 First Ave N.
Glasgow, MT 59230
Delivery Drivers must have an acceptable driving record, personal vehicle & current auto insurance.
Background required for all management positions. EOE/M/F/D/V

Feeling overwhelmed?

Moving to Prairie Ridge, Nemont or

Valley View?

A GREAT BIG VALLEY

COUNTY THANK YOU

Let us help.

SPECIALS:
FRIDAY

Soup: CLAM CHOWDER

Lunch: SHRIMP BASKET
Dinner: HALIBUT STEAK

Rates:
$60/hour: Room to room in the same location
$75/hour: Moving from your home to Prairie Ridge,
Nemont or Valley View
$100/hour: Moving from your house to a different house

SATURDAY

Call Shawn Beard 230-1025

Soup: COOKS CHOICE

Lunch: PORK CHOP BURGER
Dinner: 8oz SIRLOIN

SUNDAY

Soup: COOKS CHOICE

Lunch: 3pc CHICKEN STRIPS
Dinner: 2pc PORK CHOP

MONDAY

Soup: CHICKEN NOODLE

Lunch: SMALL CHEF SALAD
Dinner: 8oz CHICKEN FRY

We Have Soft-Serve Ice Cream!

Have Your Parties Here

BOOK NOW!
A GREAT PLACE TO
HANG OUT!

GLASGOW

SCHOOL MENU
MOND Y
A

THE HANGAR

Hwy 2 East
228-8280

Breakf
ast

Breakfast Pizza Tri Tater

Peaches Milk

MAY 14 - 20

Lunch

Chicken Salad w/Lettuce and

Cheese Salsa Snap Peas
Pineapple Choice of Fruit Milk

Boneless Beef

CROSS RIB ROAST.............. $2.99/lb.

Stones 1lb. Pkg Fresh

Sr. Citizen Menu

MONDAY

Ham & Yams

Call for reservation by 10 AM

228-9500

GROUND BEEF PATTIES........... 5/$20

Willamette Valley 1lb.
Pork, Turkey or Chicken

BACON WRAPPED FILLETS...... 5/$20

FILLETS.......
Johnsonville 19oz.

SAUSAGES..............................5/$20
Cache Valley 16oz. Select Varieties

CHEESE LOAVES...................... 5/$20

KDs
Corner
Mens Age, as Determined by a Trip to Markles Hardware:

You are in the middle of some kind of project around the house,
mowing the lawn, putting in a new fence, painting the living room or
whatever. You are hot and sweaty, covered in dust, lawn clippings, dirt or
paint. You have your old work clothes on. You know the outfit shorts
with the hole in the crotch, old T-shirt with a stain from who-knows-what
and an old pair of tennis shoes. Right in the middle of this great home
improvement project you realize you need to run to Markles Hardware to
get something to help complete the job. Depending on your age you might
do the following:
In your 20s:
Stop what you are doing. Shave, take a shower, blow dry your hair, brush
your teeth, floss and put on clean clothes. Check yourself in the mirror and
flex. Add a dab of your favorite cologne because you never know, you just
might meet some hot chick while standing in the checkout lane. And you
went to school with the pretty girl running the register...
In your 30s:
Stop what you are doing, put on clean shorts and shirt. Change shoes.
You married the hot chick so no need for much else. Wash your hands
and comb your hair. Check yourself in the mirror. Still got it. Add a shot of
your favorite cologne to cover the smell. The cute girl running the register
is the kid sister to someone you went to school with.
In your 40s:
Stop what you are doing. Put on a sweatshirt that is long enough to cover
the hole in the crotch of your shorts. Put on different shoes and a hat.
Wash your hands. Your bottle of Brute Cologne is almost empty so you
dont want to waste any of it on a trip to Markles. Check yourself in the
mirror and do more sucking in than flexing. The hot young thing running
the register is your daughters age and you feel weird thinking she is spicy.
In your 50s:
Stop what you are doing. Put on a hat, wipe the dirt off your hands onto
your shirt. Change shoes because you dont want to get dog doo-doo in
your new sports car. Check yourself in the mirror and you swear not to
wear that shirt anymore because it makes you look fat. The Cutie running
the register smiles when she sees you coming and you think you still have
it. Then you remember the hat you have on is from Bubbas Bait & Beer
Bar and it says, I Got Worms.
In your 60s:
Stop what you are doing. No need for a hat anymore. Hose the dog doodoo off your shoes. You hope you have underwear on so nothing hangs
out the hole in your pants. The girl running the register may be cute, but
you dont have your glasses on so you are not sure.
In your 70s:
Stop what you are doing. Wait to go to Markles until Western Drug has
your prescriptions ready, too. Dont even notice the dog doo-doo on your
shoes. The young thing at the register stares at you and you realize
somethings hanging out the hole in your crotch.
In your 80s:
Stop what you are doing. Start again. Then stop again.
Now you remember you need to go to Markles. Go to Gordons Foods
instead and wander around trying to think what it is you are looking for.
Fart out loud and you think someone called out your name.

Graduation

Coupon

SAVE 20%
ON ALL Silver Jeans,
Tops & Capris

Congrats, Grads!
Expires May 31st, 2014
n
Were O k!
ceboo
Fa

Athletic Physicals
at the

Glasgow Clinic
2014-2015 SEASON
SCHEDULE
YOUR
APPOINTMENT NOW BY
CALLING 228-3400

Fall Sports

Please schedule your

appointment between

May & August, 2014

Only one physical per
school year is required.

Ifyoudonothavehealth
insuranceorifyourinsurancepolicydoesnotpayfor
thisexam,financialassistanceisprovidedasaservicetoourcommunity.
Youwillnothaveanoutof
pocketexpenseforthis
service.

Winter/Spring
Sports Only

Please schedule your

appointment between

August &
November, 2014