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July 22, 2014

Suicide Prevention
Session IV-Peer and Family Conflict

Session Goals:
Youth will identify when to engage or not engage in a conflict.
Youth will be able to peacefully resolve conflicts.
Youth will identify when a conflict resolution has been adequately reached.
Youth will identify how this pertains to their peer and family relationships.
Learning Objectives:
Youth will learn about the 7 Rules for when to engage in conflict
Youth will learn about the 5 negotiation styles for dealing with conflict
Youth will discuss, explore, and act-out conflicts and their resolution
Session Agenda
I. Rules/Announcements 05 minutes
II. Introductions 15 minutes
III. Discussion 35 minutes
IV. Snack Break 15 minutes
V. Activity 2 40 minutes
VI. Reflection/Closing 10 minutes
Materials Checklist
Ice-breaker Question
Scenario slips
Negotiation style slips
Announcements/Rules
Introductions
Lets go around the circle and say our name, age, pronoun preference, and answer the
question: If you were to rate yourself on a scale of 1-10, with one being not so good at handling
conflict, and 10 being excellent at handling conflict, where would you rate yourself?
Discussion/7 Rule
Tonight were going to talk about conflict, and how to handle or deal with conflict.
When you hear the word conflict what comes to mind?
Do you, on the whole, see conflict as a positive thing, or a negative thing?
Facilitators: If youth have been talking more generally about conflict (maybe conflict around the
world, or between friends, etc), ask: How do you typically handle conflict in your own life?
Which of the following situations would you feel it would be necessary to engage in, or to confront
someone about, and why? (Facilitators: remember, there arent any wrong answers. There are
some people who are able to let things go more easily, and some people who are more easily hurt
or angered.)
o Someone bumps into you accidentally
o Someone bumps into you on purpose
o Someone insults your outfit
o Someone insults your family member
o Someone starts a rumor that youre moving to another school
o Someone starts a rumor that youve been cheating on tests
o Someone outs you
Has anyone ever heard of the 7 rule for dealing with conflict? The 7 rule suggest a way to deal
situations when they arise, and to decide whether or not a conflict is worth engaging. The 7 rules
suggest that, when a situation arises that may lead to conflict, you ask yourself whether the
situation will matter in:
o 7 seconds
o 7 minutes
o 7 hours
o 7 days
o 7 weeks
o 7 months
o 7 years
The person who created the 7 Rule recommended that people let slide anything that would
matter in 7 seconds, minutes, and days, and to only engage in conflict if the issue would still matter
in 7 days, weeks, months, or years.
Thinking about the list of events we mentioned earlier, does your answer about whether or not you
would engage in conflict change? (Facilitators: if need be, re-read the list to see if anyone would
answer differently).
Can you think of any recent situations that have happened in your own life that would have been
different if youd used the 7 rule?
Are there any other instances where the 7 rule doesnt really apply? Meaning, are there times you
would confront someone on something short-term or let slide something long-term? What are
they?

Break Snacks
Activity 2: Creative Conflict
When we choose to engage in conflict, there are several ways that the conflict can be resolved. This
activity will help the youth generate ways to navigate conflict in a productive way, and to weigh
whether or not a conflict is worth getting into.
Have the youth break into groups of 3 or 4, and have each group should randomly select a slip of
paper that gives them a scenario. Have the youth spend a few minutes working on productive
and not so productive solutions to the scenarios. The youth might begin by using the 7 rule to
ask if its worth engaging in the conflict at all.
Give the groups 15-20 minutes to create responses to various conflicts.
Have the youth come back together and have each group share the situation they discussed, and
the responses they came up with.
After each group presents, ask if any youth have any other ways to respond to the situation.
Any thoughts? Is there anything that folks have presented here tonight that may change the way
you may respond to situations in the future?
Closing
Lets go back around and state our name, age, pronoun preference, and something positive about
ourselves!

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