70s, 80s, 90s

In Philippine culture, courtship is far more subdued and indirect unlike in some Western societies. A
man who is interested in courting a woman has to be discreet and friendly at first, in order not to be
seen as too presko or mayabang (aggressive or too presumptuous). Friendly dates are often the starting
point, often with a group of other friends. Later, couples may go out on their own, but this is still to be
done discreetly. If the couple has decided to come out in the open about their romance, they will tell
their family and friends as well.
In the Philippines, if a man wants to be taken seriously by a woman, he has to visit the latter's family
and introduce himself formally to the parents of the girl. It is rather inappropriate to court a woman
and formalize the relationship without informing the parents of the girl. It is always expected that the
guy must show his face to the girl's family. And if a guy wants to be acceptable to the girl's family, he
has to give pasalubong (gifts) every time he drops by her family's house. It is said that in the
Philippines, courting a Filipina means courting her family as well.
In courting a Filipina, the metaphor often used is that of playing baseball. The man is said to reach 'first
base' if the girl accepts his proposal to go out on a date for the first time. Thereafter, going out on
several dates is like reaching the second and third bases. A 'home-run' is one where the girl formally
accepts the man's love, and they become magkasintahan (from sinta, love), a term for boyfriend-
girlfriend.
During the old times and in the rural areas of the Philippines, Filipino men would make harana
(serenade) the women at night and sing songs of love and affection. This is basically a Spanish
influence. The man is usually accompanied by his close friends who provide moral support for the guy,
apart from singing with him.
After a long courtship, if the couple later decide to get married, there is the Filipino tradition of
pamamanhikan (from panik, to go up the stairs of the house), where the man and his parents visit the
woman's family and ask for her parents blessings to marry their daughter. It is also an occasion for the
parents of the woman to get to know the parents of the man.

During pamamanhikan, the man and his parents bring some pasalubong (gifts). It is also at this time that
the wedding date is formally set, and the couple become engaged to get married.

Modern
Through the liberalism of modern-day Filipinos, there have been modifications in traditional courtship in
the Philippines. However, liberalism in courting practices and standards is still milder or still more
conservative than that of Western or Westernized counterparts of the Filipinos. Present-day Filipino
courtship, as in the traditional form, also starts with the "teasing stage" conducted by friends.
Introductions and meetings of prospective couples can now be done through a common friend or while
attending a party. Modern technology has also become a part of present-day courting practices in the
Philippines. Romantic conversations are done by the courted and by the Filipino bachelor through the
use of cellular phones particularly through texting messages and the internet. But parents,
however, still prefer that their daughters be courted formally and officially inside the confines of the
Filipino home, which is a respectful way to honour the father and mother of the Filipino single woman.
Although a present-day Filipino woman might be willing to encourage a man to court her, or she might
even initiate the courting process it is still also traditionally and culturally not appropriate for a suitor to
introduce himself to an admired woman, or vice versa, while on the street. Servitude and serenading are
no longer common, but avoidance of making love by couples prior to their life as married couples is still
valued.