6.

Distractions
I made sure that every day was filled with some kind of
“Distraction”, so she wouldn’t bring the “Please, I want you
Edward” kind of pleas. I hated denying her what was so beautiful.
All I could do was wish I were a real human man.

Why? Well, because than I, Edward Cullen, wouldn’t need to deny

her what, I as a husband had to do, please her desires.

We went snorkeling, explored the small jungle on the private

Island, watched the sunset, swam, and we “tried” to watch a
movie. Every day I would notice she was tired enough not to ask. I
knew she was mad at me sometimes, but she easily forgot about
it.

I am and will be a BAD HUSBAND!!! I am No gentlemen! I am a

Monster and a monster would hurt the people he loves! Dam it! I
thought. Since the beginning of our honeymoon I have been
cursing at anything. I have been and still am cranky. I have never
been like this. I have no idea why I’m like this.

Maybe cause you feel guilty. Maybe you want to feel this way so
the lust for bella’s body won’t make you lose your control? Just
take a risk. I now we both will enjoy it! The greedy monster inside
me said my head. I think I’m going crazy.

That’s when I heard the door creak. I looked up and I swear I saw
heaven or maybe just a glimpse.

For the love of what is all holy, I want you NOW!!!! Said the
greedy monster. I agreed with him for one second and then said
in my head No! That my fragile Bella. My mouth had been open
and on the floor, not long enough for her to see, but my eyes
didn’t so she saw them pop out.
She was wearing the most sexiest thing ever. She was wearing
something black and lacy. It opened from the bottom of her bra, it
had a matching thong and by god, I Know my member was asking
for attention at that moment.

Thank god, there is a book on my lap. Was all I could think of and
about her body.

“What do you think?” She asked, pirouetting so that I could see

every angle and curve.

I cleared my throat. “You look beautiful. You always do.” I said

trying not to be interested.

“Thanks,” She said a bit sourly knowing I “didn’t” care. You

fucking lair. Said the greedy monster. We both know WE want
her. It said. STOP! I demanded.

She was tired, she climbed in quickly and I put my arms around
her. She’s so close to you. TAKE HER!!!! I ignored that selfish
monster inside me that once only craved her blood, now it also
craved her beautiful body.

“I’ll make you a deal,” She said sleepily.

“I will not make any deals with you,” I answered.

“You haven’t even heard what I’m offering.”

“It doesn’t matter.”

She sighed. “Dang it. And I really wanted… Oh well.”

I rolled my eyes. Don’t buy it. Ugh.

“All right. What is it you want?” I asked.

“Well, I was thinking… I know that the whole Dartmouth thing was
just supposed to be a cover story, but honestly, one semester of
college probably wouldn’t kill me,” She said.
“Charlie would get a thrill out of Dartmouth stories, I bet. Sure, it
might be embarrassing if I can’t keep up with all the brainiacs.
Still… eighteen, nineteen. It’s really not such a big difference. It’s
not like I’m going to get crow’s feet in the next year.”

Why oh why!!! I thought we could finally be together equally after

this and now you want to delay it! Ugh. I want you every second
of the day and now you tell me you rather wait till one semester
of collage instead of after our honeymoon.

Then, in a low voice, I said, “You would wait.

You would stay human.”

She was silent.

“Why are you doing this to me?” I said through his teeth, my tone
suddenly

angry. “Isn’t it hard enough without all of this?” I grabbed a

handful of lace that

was ruffled on her thigh. Rip it, take her! Now! Said the greedy
monster.Then my hand relaxed. “It doesn’t matter. I won’t make
any deals with

you.” I said breaking the silence once again.

“I want to go to college.” She insisted.

“No, you don’t. And there is nothing that is worth risking your life
again. That’s

worth hurting you.”

“But I do want to go. Well, it’s not college as much as it’s that I
want—I want to be human a little while longer.”
Why can’t I be human once again? I thought. While closing my
eyes and exhaling through my nose.

“You are making me insane, Bella. Haven’t we had this argument

a million times, you always begging to be a vampire without
delay?” I asked.

“Yes, but… well, I have a reason to be human that I didn’t have

before.” She said.

“What’s that?” I asked.

“Guess,” She said, and she dragged herself off the pillows to kiss
me.

I kissed her back, but not in the way she wanted me to. Carefully I
pulled away, so I wouldn’t hurt her feelings, I cradled her in my
chest.

“You are so human, Bella. Ruled by your hormones.” I chuckled.

“That’s the whole point, Edward. I like this part of being human. I
don’t want to

give it up yet. I don’t want to wait through years of being a blood-

crazed newborn for some part of this to come back to me.”

She yawned, and I smiled. Finally.

“You’re tired. Sleep, love.” I started humming the lullaby I’d

composed for her when we first met.

“I wonder why I’m so tired,” She muttered sarcastically. “That

couldn’t be part of your scheme or anything.”

I chuckled and went back to humming.

“For as tired as I’ve been, you’d think I’d sleep better.”

The song broke off. “You’ve been sleeping like the dead, Bella.
You haven’t said a
word in your sleep since we got here. If it weren’t for the snoring,
I’d worry you

were slipping into a coma.” I said.

I haven’t been tossing? That’s weird.

Usually I’m all over the bed when I’m having nightmares. And
shouting.”

“You’ve been having nightmares?” I asked.

“Vivid ones. They make me so tired.” She yawned. “I can’t believe

I haven’t been

babbling about them all night.”

“What are they about?” I asked.

“Different things—but the same, you know, because of the

colors.”

“Colors?”

“It’s all so bright and real. Usually, when I’m dreaming, I know
that I am. With

these, I don’t know I’m asleep. It makes them scarier.”

I was disturbed when I spoke again. “What is frightening you?”

She shuddered slightly. “Mostly . . .” She hesitated.

“Mostly?” I prompted.

“The Volturi,” I whispered.

I hugged her tighter. “They aren’t going to bother us anymore.

You’ll be

immortal soon, and they’ll have no reason.” I told her.

I knew she wasn’t telling me something.

I broke the silence by asking, “What can I do to help?”

“They’re just dreams, Edward.” She insisted.

“Do you want me to sing to you? I’ll sing all night if it will keep the
bad dreams

away.” I said.

“They’re not all bad. Some are nice. So… colorful. Underwater,
with the fish and

the coral. It all seems like it’s really happening—I don’t know that
I’m dreaming.

Maybe this island is the problem. It’s really bright here.” She
explained.

“Do you want to go home?”

“No. No, not yet. Can’t we stay awhile longer?”

“We can stay as long as you want, Bella,” I promised her.

“When does the semester start? I wasn’t paying attention before.”

She said with a sleepy voice.

I sighed. I started humming again, and she fall asleep.

I slowly climbed of the bed, made my way to the doors into the
beach.

It was nice outside. I made sure bella was still asleep, and
stripped down. I dove into the water. It was so warm.

Instantly I remembered our first night her. I replayed it

repeatedly.

I needed to find a way to release my wants for my beautiful Bella.

Slowly I put both my hands down where I knew I needed
attentions. I moved my hands in an up, down direction. I imaged I
was in my Bella.

That’s when I heard my lovely wife’s heart beat slow down. I

quickly put my clothes on and rushed in my hair already dry. I
didn’t release my want for her, Now it was double the need.

That was when she gasped.

“Bella?” I whispered, my arms tight around her, shaking her

gently. “Are

you all right, sweetheart?”

“Oh,” She gasped again. Suddenly tears where overflowing form

her eyes.

“Bella!” I said—louder, alarmed now. “What’s wrong?” I wiped

the tears from

her hot cheeks with my fingers.

“It was only a dream.” she couldn’t contain the low sob that broke
in my voice.

“It’s okay, love, you’re fine. I’m here.” I rocked her back and forth,
a little too

fast to soothe. “Did you have another nightmare? It wasn’t real, it

wasn’t real.”

“Not a nightmare.” She shook her head, scrubbing the back of her
hand against her eyes. “It was a good dream.” Her voice broke
again.

“Then why are you crying?” I asked, bewildered.

“Because I woke up,” She wailed, wrapping her arms around my

neck in a chokehold and sobbing into my throat.
I laughed once at her logic, but I was concerned. .

“Everything’s all right, Bella. Take deep breaths.”

“It was so real,” She cried. “I wanted it to be real.”

“Tell me about it,” I urged. “Maybe that will help.”

“We were on the beach. . . .” She trailed off, pulling back to look
with tear-filled eyes at my anxious face, dim in the darkness.

“And?” I finally prompted.

She blinked the tears out of her eyes, torn. “Oh, Edward . . .”

“Tell me, Bella,” I pleaded, eyes wild with worry at the pain in her
voice.

But instead of telling me she clutched her arms around my neck

and kissed me with so much passion and need.

I responded in the way she wouldn’t like, by pulling her of me.

“No bella,” I told her in a firm voice.

She dropped her arms and once more started to cry again.

I stared at her confused.

“I’m s-s-s-orry,” She mumbled.

Kiss her! Take her! Now! The greedy monster ordered.

Instead I hugged her.

“I can’t, Bella, I can’t!” I moan.

“Please,” She said, my plea muffled against my skin. “Please,

Edward?”