Kylar McNeal

Ms. Brause
English Composition II; Period 3
11 Septemer !"1#
$he heart is the central mechanism that has the utmost e%ecuti&e authority o&er
our li&es. $he scope o' the heart is minor( only the si)e o' a clenched human 'ist;
po*er'ul( yet su''icient. +o* is it( that a minuscule organ o' those proportions can
manage to eat !., million times o&er the course o' a li'e( pump 1""(""" times a day(
sending !(""" gallons o' lood through your &eins e&ery !# hours- $he heart needs to e
as precise as a S*iss timepiece( as *ell maintained as a ne* Mercedes( and as airtight as
a &acuum seal.
$he mas. is gently put o&er my 'ace. /Breathe in./ I do as I am told. $hen I 'eel it(
the endless 'eeling o' 'alling and spinning( li.e the nightmare *e all .no* 'ar to *ell(
tumling do*n into complete nothingness. $hen lac..
My eyes 'lash( I ta.e in the relie&ed sigh o' my mother. I 'all ac. asleep( the
anesthesia controlling my e&ery mo&e li.e a rag doll. 0 'e* more hours pass( although I
ha&e no sense o' time( and then they 'lash open again. $his time more people are
surrounding me( although I am unale to remain conscience long enough to communicate
*ith any o' them. $he third time( I am ale to resist sleep. I try tal.ing( ut it is mu''led(
li.e the sound o' yelling under*ater; pure inaudile noise that only you understand. My
throat is urning( almost as i' it has a sense o' pride( li.e an 1lympic torch e'ore an
audience o' thousands. 2ater I *ould learn that during general anesthesia( an
endotracheal tue is put into your mouth and do*n your throat( a process called
intuation. $his tue is then attached to the &entilator to help you reathe during surgery.
$he de&il tue is ho* I li.e to thin. o' it( *ith Satan himsel' standing on the outside o'
the plastic e%os.eleton( glee'ully lasting a 'lame thro*er onto the inside o' my *ind
pipe( *ith the pain gro*ing e&ermore intense. My hands are strapped do*n at my side( to
pre&ent mysel' 'rom remo&ing the tue along *ith the Chie' o' 3emons. 0sleep again.
$he ne%t time I a*a.e( the tue is gone( and I am once again reathing on my
o*n. I 'ight to stay and a*a.e and e%change the endless /I lo&e you/ con&ersations *ith
those *ho ha&e come to &isit me. Emotion o&er*helms me li.e the 'eeling o' standing
toe4to4toe *ith a giant( *ith only a sling and a stone to de'end yoursel'. 5ear. Instant
relie' s*eeps in li.e spring tide during a 'ull moon. $he reali)ation hits that it is all o&er( I
ha&e sur&i&ed open heart surgery; something that may e as small as a mo&e on a chess
oard( ut in my eyes as ig as( *ell( open heart surgery.
In !"1" I *as diagnosed *ith an atrial septum de'ect( meaning that there *as a hole
in my heart. I *as 'ine( 'or no*. I' surgery *asn6t per'ormed( I *ould surely e
handicapped y my early t*enties. 0t 7ust 1# years old( I *as gi&en a general anesthesia(
put to sleep( cut open( and I *as ac. on the 'ootall 'ield in 7ust *ee.s. Perhaps the
iggest ta.ea*ay 'rom such a daunting e%perience( *as ho* little appreciation *e ha&e
'or things in our o*n li&es. 0s I sit here( 'ingers gently rushing against the so't( plastic
.eys( typing *hat may e 7ust a collection o' meaningless( tri&ial( and an other*ise
unreli&ant collection o' originally misspelled *ords and misplaced commas( I .no* that
the opinion o' someone *ho criti8ues this( is sediment and ruish. My scar do*n the
'ront o' my ody *ill 'ore&er remind me that I can reathe again on my o*n. Nothing
else matters( not one person6s e%a%t opinion o' me( ut the 'act that I am ali&e and ha&e
the chance to ha&e that opion made. 1&er the ne%t !# hours( *hile my heart eats
1""(""" times( I *ill ma.e each reath count .no*ing that someone out there isn6t as
'ortunate( li&es only ecause a tue grants them the P9I:I2E;E to do so. 2i'e is a
pri&ilege and I li&e mine .no*ing that it could all end in a single moment( an instant( in
the time it ta.es to ta.e a reath. $hen *hat- Blac..
<or.s Cited
<atson( Stephanie. /5i&e 0ma)ing 5acts 0out the +uman +eart./ <eM3. <eM3(
n.d. <e. 1! Sept. !"1#.