December 23 by Ryan Clements in Communication, Motivation 3!"# $%ares
Man often becomes what he believes himself to be. If I keep on saying to myself that I cannot do a certain thing, it is possible that I may end by really becoming incapable of doing it. On the contrary, if I have the belief that I can do it, I shall surely acquire the capacity to do it even if I may not have it at the beginning. Mahatma !andhi "ear e#ists at the heart of every unfulfilled dream. If there is something in our life that we want, we are going to have to confront some fears in order to get it. $aving confidence in our ability to achieve goals, to move forward in the face of fear, and to accomplish our desires, is critical if we are going to live a life that is personally fulfilling and meaningful. %ot everyone is born with natural confidence. &ome people struggle, and for many people, difficult circumstances in their own lives can really impact their self confidence. &o what can be done' (nyone can develop more self confidence if they take some simple actions and, more importantly, build these actions into habits. $ere are )* ways to instantly have confidence. 1! &ut a 'ittle (ffort Into )ur *++earance &ounds simple, but it really works. +hen we put effort into our appearance, our dress, and our grooming, we feel better about ourselves. ,oes this mean that we have to be savvy to all the latest fashions and spend a large chunk of our savings on wardrobe upgrades' %ot likely. -he most important thing is that we build a habit of doing the best with what we have, and small simple improvements in the ways we present ourselves will have a positive impact on how we feel and our confidence. ( secret weapon when it comes to our appearance. shoes. -ake good care of our shoes. /pgrade them if necessary. !ood looking shoes go a long way for a good feeling person. 2! Do *n *ct )f $ervice ,or $omeone (lse -his is critical. +e can be our own worst enemy when it comes to our emotions. Many times, we feel bad about ourselves simply because we are focused too much on our self. !etting outside of the self can be truly refreshing, empowering and goes a long way to building your self confidence. +here to start' 0ook around, there are people everywhere. "ind someone and do something nice for them. -hen find someone else and do something nice for them. (fter a while, you1ll be ama2ed at how great you feel. 3! -e &re+ared &ometimes a lack of confidence is as simple as a lack of preparation. %ervous about that 3ob interview' $ow well did we prepare' %ervous about that upcoming e#am' $ow well did we study' %ervous about not making those sales targets' +hat was our preparation like' $ow effectively did we work' (ction is the best antidote to an#iety and fear. 4eing perfectly prepared for whatever we are about to do will give us confidence. +hen we know that we have made the best possible preparations for what we are about to do, we will be more confident. "! Ta.e * 'oo. *t )ur &osture &eems funny, but it actually works. $ow do you stand' ,o you slouch' +hat is your posture like when you are sitting' +hen you stand up straight, and sit with correct posture in your chair, you feel better about yourself. 5ou1re able to breath easier and this o#ygen supply does wonders for your brain and our body. 5ou need o#ygen to feel good and sometimes your lack of o#ygen can be traced to poor posture. /! $et a 0Micro12oal3 *nd *c%ieve It 6onfidence is based on a belief that we are capable of achieving things, therefore we don1t need to be scared. &ometimes we get into a rut where we don1t feel like we are capable of achieving anything. +hen this happens it can be hard to start, and big goals seem almost out of the question. &o what you need to do in this instance is to set a micro7goal and then achieve it. ( micro7goal is a very small goal that is in your power. "or instance, if you have a sales based career, simply make a goal of picking up the phone and calling 8 people. ,on1t even focus on making a sale. 9ust achieve the goal of calling. +hy does this work' 4ecause it gives you momentum and it signals the brain that you can achieve things. If you do it over and over and over again : set a small goal and then achieve it : you1ll will be pleasantly surprised at how you feel. 4! C%an5e )ne Tiny Habit +hen we get stuck in a confidence rut it can be very hard to change ma3or habits. +e 3ust don1t believe that we are capable of change, and we don1t have the momentum to support our desire. &o I1m not talking about changing big habits here, like stop smoking. I1m talking about tiny habits, like making a bed, or waking up )* minutes earlier, or choosing a salad instead of fries. -iny habits work because, like setting micro7goals, they give us momentum. Once you change one thing, you1ll want to change others, and best of all, you develop confidence from your past victories. &ince you have changed one thing, you know you are capable of changing others. 6! $mile &ounds trite, but it really works. +hen we smile we are happier. +hen we are happier we have more self7confidence. It1s also contagious. -hink about you day7to7day life. +hen you go for a coffee break and the server gives you a warm smile, does it make you upset' ,oes it make you angry and really depressed' %ot at all. &ometimes that little gesture is e#actly what you need to make you feel better about what is otherwise a difficult day. +hen you smile, and when others smile at you, we all feel better. +hen you feel better, you have more confidence. 7! Ma.e * 'ist of 10 T%in5s T%at We *re 2rateful ,or !ratitude is one of the most powerful tools against depression and lack of confidence. +hat is one of the quickest ways to feel grateful' &imply make a list. Make a list of )* things that you are grateful for. +hen the list is done, read it. 4y the time you1ve done that, you1re sure to feel better about yourself. 5ou reali2e that life isn1t that bad and that there are many good things in your life, right now. -his attitude of gratitude helps you feel more confident about moving forward and making new things happen. 10! 2et *ctive and $tart (8ercisin5 (s -ony ;obbins has said, emotion is created by motion. If we want to feel good, we need to move and breathe. Moving increases our o#ygen intake which increases our happiness and general sense of well being. <#ercising cuts fat, builds muscle and improves our skin tone and appearance. +e will instantly feel better because of the o#ygen intake, but if we make this step a lasting habit, we will also soon reap the benefits of looking into the mirror and being pleased with the results that we see : results that we have created through our actions. -his will increase our confidence.
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