PRACTICAL RULES FOR BEING SUCCESSFUL

By: shbv1

1. Be Bold – take risks with your words and actions. Being bold will produce results you never had before
because you’re doing things you’ve never done before and because you’ll never know the outcome until
after you take the risk.

2. Expect Success – start every encounter with the expectation that you are succeeding

3. Don’t State, Suggest – use the power of suggestion instead of flat-out statements. Suggestions from an
authority figure can often override a person’s visual memory to create a new and different memory. Use
quotes from authority figures. Before you paint a new picture, address whatever is causing their resistance
(conscious resistance) or reactance (unconscious resistance). People are very receptive to information and
attitudes that agree with their beliefs and points of view and will formulate arguments on the spot toward
what disagrees with their beliefs and points of view. Always discover current beliefs and attitudes and
reaffirm them. Affirm the individual’s point of view. DO NOT have people state verbally or in writing
anything that you want to change later.

4. Avoid Communicating (verbally or in writing) any Attitude or Belief that is not Desired. – Once
expressed (verbally or in writing), it will be maintained even in the face of overwhelming evidence to the
contrary.

5. Practice, Practice, Practice – Work hard in private so that it seem easy in public

6. Be Prepared – stay several steps ahead of you audience at all times

7. Identify and Focus a Single Target Problem or Issue - This is something that the person no longer
wants to have or experience. Argue that continuing with this condition/situation without addressing it will
ultimately cost in many painful ways. There is powerful psychology behind this tactic. Trigger the pain
button first before beginning to talk about changes that you want accepted. It is the nature of human beings
to seek affiliation, to make friends, and to care about others. But sometimes it can be hard for a person to
reach out and “expose” his or her true self, feelings, and emotions. Many want to connect but are afraid.
Things get in the wary of their innate desires; things like fear of rejection, vulnerability, ego, and jealousy
are but a few of the multitude of mixed emotions, attitudes, and beliefs that keep us from reaching out and
bonding with others. Psychological techniques simply influence a person’s natural state to emerge. We feel
good when we give, love, and help. It’s not about forcing a person to do anything; it’s about helping to
bring the person’s submerged desires to the surface. To determine if a person is in a good mood, look for
direct eye contact AND a true (Duchene) smile.

8. Establish Rapport – At the core of interpersonal relationships is mutual liking and respect based on
strictly unconscious processes. It doesn’t happen by chance and we are unaware of it.

a. Use the Law of Association – By pairing yourself with pleasurable stimuli, another person will
begin to associate you with this feeling. Talk to people only when they are in a good mood or
when they are excited about something. These feelings will be anchored (associated) to you
and the person will come to have positive feelings for you.
b. Use the Law of Repeat Positive Exposure – the more you interact positively with someone,
the more they like you!! Repeated positive exposure to a stimulus – in this case a person – leads
to a greater appreciation and liking. This is true of anything - person, place, product, etc. – the
greater the positive exposure, the more positive the response. This is why companies

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 sometimes advertise just the name or the picture of the product without mentioning any
specific benefit or advantage in using the product. They don’t need to tell us how wonderful it
is. They only need to remind us of it. Exposure, being a component of repetition, can alone
increase a person’s liking of you and willingness to cooperate. By sim0ly being around, you
can “grow” on the person. Sometimes we make the mistake of appearing mysterious or aloof or
inaccessible, but this diminished the frequency of positive interaction and leads to lowered
levels of attention and appreciation. We tend to make friends of and like more those who are
most like us and those who are physically nearest to us because of the increased interaction.
c. Use the Law of Reciprocal Affection - We like more those who like us or thinks well of us.
We are unconsciously drawn to that person. Be sure to let your “target” person gradually
know that you like and respect him or her – fond, appreciate, like, attracted, love. If a person
starts out not liking you and then gradually comes to like you, that person will eventually like
you more than if they had originally liked you. Gradual liking is much more effective than
instantaneous liking.
d. Use the Law of Similarities – It is not true that opposites attract. We like more those who are
most like us and who have similar interests. We may find someone interesting because of
differences. However, it’s the similarities and commonalities that generate liking. Like attracts
like. When you speak to the person talk about things that you both like, enjoy, and have in
common. People who go thorough life-changing situations together tend to form a significant
bond. This is powerful because people will bond even if the experience was not shared but was
similarly experienced. It’s for this reason that people who have never met but who have shared
similar experiences – even diseases – can become friends instantly. It is the “he/she understands
me” that generates warm feelings for another. It all comes down to the fact that we want to be
understood and the common event has helped to shape the both persons in a similar way.
e. Use the Law of Feelings – How someone feels about you is largely determined by how you
make them feel about themselves. It’s how you make her/him feel when they’re with you that
makes the difference. Be sincere, complimentary, kind, and warm.
f. Use the Law of Scarcity - when someone perceives something that they desire to be in limited
quantity, the perceived value of that thing or person becomes much greater than if were widely
available. Avoid making yourself overly available to someone you want to influence or are
attracted to (gifts, showing affection, etc.) but this over availability sometimes causes the
opposite reaction to occur—the person actually places a lower value on the person because it is
in abundance. If the other person believes that you are highly desired by others, hence, you’re
demand outweighs your supply, then your value will go up. 2. Increasing the price or
decreasing the availability of a person, product, or service will increase the perceived value of
that product or service in the eyes of others. 3. If you want to persuade someone to commit to
an appointment, then try to increase the perceived value on your own time. Instead of saying
that you have the entire day free, which creates a state of abundance, instead say you are busy
and have only such-and-such time free. This increases the perceived value of your own time
and makes the other person take scheduling an appointment with you more seriously.
g. Use the Law of Gratitude - When you are grateful ‘in advance,’ you show that you are feeling
and responding to the good will of the other person and cause the person to manifest good will
toward you. The subconscious mind makes no distinction between what is real and what is
imagined—its conviction comes from your emotional state. With an attitude of gratitude, you
induce a positive emotional state that is associated to you. If you are trying to attract a person or
have abundance, then being grateful for being with that person or all your abundant blessings
puts you in the role of fulfilling your desire.

9. Discuss The Ideas And Changes That You Want Accepted – couch your discussion on their values
and beliefs.