Xander Nightclub Promoter

http://postmasculine.
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Exposing the Nightclub Industry, Part 1: Velvet Ropes
On October 26, 2011 By Mark Manson 22 Comments
Guest post by Xander.
Everyone is either trying to preserve or disprove who they were in high school.
- Alec Sulkin, TV Writer
Ive spent a ridiculous amount of time in nightclubs. More than I care to admit or consider. I
remember when DJs played entire songs and bottle service was something that happened at
recycling plants. Things have changed in the 10+ years Ive been going out in Hollywood but as
the saying goes the more they change the more they stay the same. The faces change, the
venues close, remodel, and reopen, and the drinks get poured and consumed but the basic
spectacle of the human mating dance and its peculiarities remains the same.
In this first of three articles, Im going to be giving a peek behind the velvet rope. Ive spent
considerable time on each side of its cruel velour as both patron and promoter and will offer you a
view of the landscape with an insiders eye.
Club Life
Nightclubs have a daunting economic reality. There are huge start-up costs including liquor
licenses, leases, furniture and dcor, and yet clubs have very short life spans. Good clubs are
good for less than a year and hope to hold on for an additional 2 to 3 years before closing down
and starting over. This means that while the club has its run the owners have to milk it for
everything its got. They do this, ironically, by denying entrance to as many people as possible. At
least as many men as possible.
In nightlife, the product is the women. Sure the music

and the venue matter but chubby Persian guys arent
paying $1000 for a pair of $40 bottles of Grey Goose to
watch some trust fund kid play his iPod. They are there
to (try to) hook up (have sex) with beautiful women. The
proprietors of these places would call it selling an
experience but "what they are really selling is sex and
self-esteem". Because as soon as you put a rope in front of something anything
really and say no to people, basic human nature dictates that they will do almost
anything to make those resurfaced feelings of awkward teenage angst disappear. Even
billionaires crumble under the weight of their own insecurities. This is the business model
of a nightclub.
Clubs seek out the right crowds via promoters. Rather

than the club itself finding attractive men and women
and guys willing to spring for bottle service, owners and
general managers contact promoters they know can
deliver an abundance of attractive women to serve as

bait for hopeful and spendthrift men. Promoters work independently
and often in hierarchical structures not dissimilar to the Mafia, with high level promoters
outsourcing grunt work to lower level sub-promoters and everyone skimming from
everyone else. In the movie of my life, I hope Ray Liotta plays me.
The women, of course, frequent these places to feel cool, to feel

better than other women, and to meet guys. The clubs perceived
exclusivity is a boon for women who would rather compete for
a few high status guys than have hordes of drunk, horny
undesirables pawing at them all night.
Platos Cave
Image is everything in nightlife. The women spend hours looking their best and the clubs create
false demand by keeping lines outside of empty venues. The patrons often are looking for
validation either by gaining entrance or gaining the affections of attractive strangers. Once inside
the basic message that people often try to convey when they are in the club is Im having more
fun than you. Its conspicuous consumption at its finest. But look a little closer and youll see that
the emperor has no clothes.
While it seems that a bunch of great looking people got together to celebrate some occasion that
you wish you were a part of, in fact club goers often only get together to club. Thus, the
relationships in nightlife are often very tenuous. Girls that go out together are less friends than
they are coworkers of sort, going-out partners looking to maximize their dwindling shelflives, Promoters may seem to be great friends (or more) with the girls at their tables but
its often a symbiotic relationship that enables each to fulfill their role. The girls get to feel
like they are in the in crowd, get free drinks and are allowed to rest their tired, stilettoed
feet at the promoters table while the promoters fulfill their mandate to bring attractive girls
to the club.
But the reality is that the promoter

has 4000-5000 phone numbers in his
Blackberry, with girls grouped by
rating (on a 1-10 scale of course) so
the promoter knows which girls to
invite to which events. Even worse,
the promoter will group girls of the
same first name together so when he
sends out his mass texts on
Saturday afternoon they look

personalized (e.g Hey Jenny, {paste
generic come to X club tonight.})
Lovely, isnt it? This objectification of
human interaction permeates the
club experience and, combined with
the virtual anonymity offered in such
large gatherings, engenders
superficial and transactional
interactions among participants.
Frequent club-goers often become
jaded and disengaged. Rather than
having a good time with their
friends youll often see people
standing on the couches texting
people who actually care about them.
Facebook Me
Comedian Dave Attell hosted a show from 2001 2004 called Insomnaic where he traveled city
to city hanging out late night, getting drunk, and rabble-rousing. In a recent interview he offered
the following,
I dont think I could do that show now. Those late night scenes just arent there anymore. A lot of
these kids I think are more content just to be on Facebook and the computer than they are to
actually go out. They just really want to get a picture to post to their buddies wall, and thats about
it.
Theres a lot of truth to this. Facebook has changed the game as promoters craft their images via
their profiles (lame private jet profile picture anyone?), recruit and filter customers, and even fire
out mass invites via Facebook events. Much of the social competition that women engage in also
has moved out of the club and online, as funny and provocative pictures garner much more
validation with much less effort than a night on the town.
Even before the rise of social media, nightclubs were taking a hit. I was surprised to hear a
general manager tell me that he thought business had declined 20% because of the rise of
internet dating. Although the nightlife scene is sometimes referred to as a bubble, it seems as
though it is not immune to the trends that are affecting the rest of the world. If the goal is simple P
in V sexual relations, nightclubs can seem anachronistic in a world of world of online dating,
Facebook, Twitter, and Foursquare.
Last Call
At its best, nightlife is an extravaganza of the senses. The aesthetic and architecture of a well
made venue, the aural pulsing of the speakers emanating deep-bassed drumbeats and of course
the parade of beautiful women in short miniskirts and their painstakingly crafted illusions inciting
The
clubs and "the promoters" do much of the legwork for a single
man. They scour the city for the most attractive women, house
them in one place, engage them with alcohol and near seizureinducing sights and sounds, and pit them against each other in
a skin-to-win competition for the attention of men. Under the
right circumstances and with the right people, nightlife can truly
be a fun and exceptional experience.
feelings in men that hearken back to stolen kisses beneath playground swing sets.
At their worst, clubs exploit human frailty. Insecurity can manifest itself in fights (men) or eating
disorders (women). Addictions can be enabled. And people can confront a great chasm between
what they seek and what actually makes them happy. If lived in too long, club life becomes the
social equivalent of junk food. Sweet and satisfying at the beginning but ultimately leaves you
feeling empty.
Exposing the Nightclub Industry Part 2: Club Girls
On November 2, 2011 By Mark Manson 32 Comments
How the hell could you front on me? Theres a thousand yous, theres only one of me
Kanye West
Consider this thought experiment. Imagine a beautiful woman. She grew up in a mid-sized
town in Minnesota where she was always the prettiest girl in school. Prom queen,
cheerleader, even her biology teacher turned into a bumbling baffoon around her. Her
whole life people told her she was gorgeous, ascribed qualities to her (some real, some
imagined) that made her feel exceptional, and generally made the world cotton for her
perfectly manicured toes to walk on. Maybe she went to college where she enjoyed
sorority life and dated the bartender at the local post-game spot. In her early twenties she
decides shes outgrown the town and moves to the big city to pursue her dream of being
an actress (LA), model (NY) or kept woman (Miami). Mostly shes looking for fun and
adventure and fulfilling the destiny that she was meant for something more than getting
married after school and settling down with her on-again, off-again ex-boyfriend.
Shes excited to experience the big city and fantasizes about meeting someone famous
and ending up as tabloid fodder. She finally meets some cool girls through work and starts
frequenting the latest spot that shes read about in magazines and on TMZ. Its very
exciting at first; the people dress well, she sees the celebrities she was hoping to see and
she hardly makes it into to work in one piece those first few weeks. But she realizes
quickly that shes not in Minnesota anymore. While the nights are fun and the drinks are
free, she looks around each night and realizes that there are a hundred girls that look just
like her. Same Bebe dress, same hairstyle copied out of InStyle magazine and same pair of
Louboutins that she cant afford. She cant help but feeldisposable. Another nameless,
faceless mini-skirt in a room full of them, shepherded around like cattle by a promoter.
The feeling she gets from the men she dates, if you can call them dates, is that they view
her as a completely fungible commodity. They want to have sex with a hot girl and are not
that particular about which one. They dont put forth much effort and dont seem to mind
much when she ignores them for a bit when shes angry. She cant help but feel
very..ordinary.
Within a few short months, shes already over the scene. She knows every promoter, shes
been to the afterparties, shes met the D-list celebrities, and its all the same night after
night. She doesnt even really enjoy clubbing anymore and realizes that none of the people
she considers friends would visit her in the hospital if she broke her foot. She just
doesnt know where else to meet guys and going out is marginally better than staying
home by herself.
Maybe she does this for a while, rotating venues and even friends periodically. While shes
been going out almost every weekend and has dated lots of guys, the girl who was never
single back home now hasnt had a boyfriend in the three years shes been here. Despite
constantly being in a crowded venue, shes never felt more alone. This is reality for most
of the girls in nightlife.
Reality Check
Underneath it all, she's just looking for a little affection... like the rest of us.
Most of the girls in a club on a Friday or Saturday night are not what you would think of as club
girls. They are girls just like the ones in the preceding parable. They dont do coke (maybe
adderall to lose weight once in awhile) they arent hooking up every single weekend, and they
arent hanging out with anything remotely resembling an A-list crowd. Most of them work jobs or
go to school and while they love to tell you about some celebrity they hung out with or some
mansion party they attended, their lives arent really all that fabulous.
Its worth noting that there is a certain small segment of the female club-going population that
does live that life. They get flown out to party in exotic locales, they date famous men, they dont
have real jobs, and they often get paid for sex one way or another, either via a (probably married)
sugar daddy, in exchange for drugs, or in actual transactions of prostitution. These are the real
club girls and they should be avoided like canker sores. Theyre like vampires, soulless
creatures who suck life-force and resources from anything and everything around them, without
regard or scruples or anything that could be construed as humanity. They generally come from
poor backgrounds (although occasionally very wealthy ones) and end up as trophy wives or
mistresses (see the Real Housewives series for a glimpse into their future).
Each girl in a club is slightly different. You are best served by treating them as individuals rather
than trying to lump them into some preconceived idea of what kind of girl goes to a club. Because
the reality is that most women in their 20s residing in major cities go to nightclubs at least
occasionally. The more frequently she attends, the more likely she is to exhibit characteristics of a
club girl in part from the effect frequent club-going has on her and in part because women with
these characteristics are more drawn to clubs in the first place.
A Closer Look
There are certain themes youll see repeated if you approach enough women in nightclubs. For
starters, nightlife attracts superficial people. Its a stereotype thats deserved. But lets take one
step further and examine what that really means. In this case, it means that the women will for the
most part be more concerned with appearance. In fact many of them spend most of their waking
day thinking about appearance, both theirs and others. Theyre constantly counting calories
consumed and burned, trying to stave off food cravings for the things they cant eat (they are
perpetually trying to lose weight after all), are constantly are reading fashion magazines and
blogs to keep up on the latest trends, and are going shopping every weekend to make sure they
look their best. They often work in appearance-focused jobs make-up artists, hair-stylists,
aestheticians, spas/gyms/fitness, retail/fashion(especially fashion students if you live in NY or
LA), PR., media, and of course modeling and acting.
In part because these women tend to be younger (most are in their early to mid-twenties), they
are often not very good at life yet. They are constantly late and disheveled, they voice every mild
annoyance throughout their day, they forget their IDs, are late on their bills, get parking tickets
frequently, and are among the most broke people you have ever met. Youve never seen a group
of people less willing to reach for their wallets than these girls. As a promoter, you could pick
them up in stretch limo and pass them free drinks in bottle service all night but ask them for a
dollar to tip a waitress at the afterhours diner and they will look at you like you just asked for their
mothers kidney.
Besides not paying for things, the favorite pastime of these girls is name dropping and
humblebragging. Get used to it and learn how to deal with it. In part because theyre young, they
are likely to have few accomplishments from which to derive real self-esteem. Consequently
these girls are constantly pinging for validation via a bombarding of name dropping and
humblebragging. Many of their stories revolve around wealthy or famous people they have met or
parties they have attended. She will refer to a famous person as my friend even if that person
wouldnt remember her name if he saw her again. Shell brag about the special treatment she got
at a club or restaurant. I often thought about selling t-shirts that said I know the owner because
judging by how often I heard the phrase I think I could have made a killing. A girl that used to
come out to my events once posted on her Facebook wall Ugh, all these Oscar parties and I
dont know what to wear it just makes me want to curl up in my pajamas and stay in. These kinds
of comments are common and said without irony. They are also bullshit. While they may have met
Drake once or went to a party at Wilmer Valderramas house, they were likely nothing more than
background aesthetic, little different than the fern in the corner or the artwork purchased at
Zgallerie. And they know it.
These name drops and humblebrags are often best dealt with by either ignoring them completely
or making fun of what is such an obvious play for validation.
Examples
Her: We were out at The Mondrian and Rob Kardashian came up to me
Me: Whos that?
Her: This house had an infinity pool and 4 levels and an indoor basketball court
Me: I bet I could save money if I went on food stamps. How do you get those?
Her: What are you up to?
Me: Dinner with a coworker at Dan Tanas
Her: I know the owner
Me: Can you DVR Boardwalk Empire? I forgot to set mine
Often these girls will seek to differentiate themselves from the other women in the venue or from
the club scene in general. Theyll say things like I dont really go out or Im not your typical LA
girl or I hate drama, or I dont date guys I meet in clubs. But much like the clich I dont
normally do this, these statements are often in direct opposition to reality. Week after week,
these places are filled with women who dont go out who are very typical LA girls (by virtue of
the fact that they are saying they are not typical), who love drama and whose last boyfriend
approached her at a club. And the more vocally and ardently she states these things, the more
likely the opposite is true, like an anti-gay evangelical who gets caught soliciting gay sex in a reststop bathroom.
Like nightlife itself, much of what is said and done by the women should be viewed as a smoke
screen. As the saying goes, I believe none of what I hear and only half of what I see. Because in
truth while they love to imply that they are living the celebrity lifestyle, youd be shocked by how
many of these girls end up on eHarmony. Because beneath the desire for the glamorous life is
still that girl from Minnesota who is looking for a normal guy to lie on the couch with and watch
romantic comedies.
In part 3 well be expanding on this, examining how a man can succeed with these women and
how to thrive in nightclubs without losing your soul or your savings
Exposing The Night Club Industry Part 3: Survival Guide
On November 11, 2011 By Mark Manson 18 Comments
Now that weve discussed the landscape of nightclubs and girls youll find in them, its time to
prep you for surviving and thriving in these modern day Gomorrahs of house music and harlots.
The first thing I would suggest is to consider strongly how much investment you are willing to put
into nightclubs. I imagine most of you are weekend warriors: you have a regular job and like to go
out on the weekends to hit on girls with a few friends. Thats cool; most of the article is for you.
But you if plan on spending a lot of time in nightclubs, I recommend becoming a promoter.
Short of being famous, being a promoter has got to be the easiest way to get women. Its
criminally easy. The majority of your time is spent interacting with women, you are automatically
more cool and in-the-know than they are, and the constant entourage of women around you
stokes their competitive fires and make you an object of their desire. When a girl breaks up with
her boyfriend, is she going to rebound with a random stranger? Or you, a guy shes known for
several months? Not only are you attractive to her for the preceding reasons but she knows she
can have some fun without worrying about getting too emotionally involved. You are a promoter,
after all.
So being a promoter is an easy way to get laid,

but becoming a promoter will take some work. I
recommend finding a current promoter (theyll be
the ones with 5000 Facebook friends) and
attending his events regularly. Dress well and
always have girls with you (hire them off
Craigslist if you have to Im serious). Eventually
ask to sub-promote for him, meaning you will
bring girls to the club and he will get credited for
them. Over a certain threshold and hell start

paying you. At the beginning you wont really
make much money but youll be able to meet girls
in a very under the radar way not by attempting
to pick them up but by inviting them out for a
night of fun.
If you do decide to go this route, I recommend NOT doing it full-time and having an exit strategy.
Most promoters have other things going on and frankly a life of full partying is not a very happy or
meaningful one for an extended time. Subjugating your entire life to the needs of your penis is a
poor way to live in the long run. And the late nights definitely catch up with you. So have an end
game in mind.
For the rest of you who decide not to go that route, lets get you in.
Getting You Past the Door
First things first. There is no such thing as a guest list. Except in very rare occasions there are no
names printed on any list. The sheet of paper the girl at the door is holding has a list of promoter
names and a tally for each so the club can evaluate how many people each promoter is bringing
through the door. Saying you are not on the list or that the list is closed is a polite blow-off. Ditto
for Its a private party and Were at capacity.
What determines whether you get in is how you look (including, unfortunately, your race), how
youre dressed, and the guy / girl ratio in your group. So you need to plan ahead. Dress well, find
girls (sister, coworkers, whatever), and show up early.
But Xander, if I had girls I wouldnt be coming to the club! Touch. Have no fear, theres another
option greasing. Greasing is the practice of paying off someone for entrance. Typically this is
going to be a bouncer. At the door youll also have the VIP hostess (its usually a girl) handling
bottle service and sometimes the general manager checking out the line and seeing that
everyone outside is doing their job. Neither the VIP hostess nor the GM are generally going to
accept greases. So your best bet is the bouncer. Walk up to him and whisper an offer. If hes
going to play ball, hell counter or accept. In LA $20-$50 a guy can get you in to most places but
again it depends how you look and how many guys you have. Of course different cities vary.
You can also grease the promoter. I recommend messaging him on Facebook ahead of time and
offering him money to have him walk you in. Promoters roll to the club with lots of girls (to boost
their image with the club and the club-goers) so they can usually sneak in a few guy friends
interspersed between the girls.
Some places offer dinner or host mixers / events in the early evening which guarantees entrance
for the later club night. This can also be a good route when you find them.
[Note from Mark: Another way is to approach women outside on the street near the club. Offer to
buy them a round of drinks if they walk in with you. Many will blow you off, but it often doesn't take
long to round up 4-5 girls to masquerade as your "friends." But be warned, this is a horrible way
to actually pick the girls up. It makes you look like a loser and they usually blow you off the
second you buy them their drinks.]
As a last resort theres bottle service. This is a huge rip-off and I dont recommend it. Bottle
service is an expensive way to get into a club, and Ill be honest, it hardly helps with the girls. The
best bottle service is always on someone elses tab.
Whatever your strategy for entrance, if you are going to nightclubs regularly, you should be
getting to know the promoters, bouncers, bartenders, etc. Go on off nights and say hello. Its a
small group of these people that rotate around the clubs in a given city so knowing them gives
you status wherever the party goes. If you know the three main promoters in a venue you can get
an introduction to probably half the women in the club. Now you are no longer a random club guy
you are a friend of friend. This isnt very meaningful to us but it means a lot to women. Speaking
of the women
Picking Up Club Girls
Early pick up dogma focused intently on the verbal aspect of interacting with women. Even now
guys usually spend tremendous mental energy thinking about what to say. And yet these brilliant
scripts and routines were meant to be practiced in a place where they were least likely to be
actually heard, not only due to the loud music but the energy level and litany of distractions in a
nightclub. Also part of this strategy was picking a target and focusing your attention on how to get
her. This strangely nullifies the chief benefit of approaching women in clubs: volume. A club is the
one place where you can squeeze in a lot of at-bats in a short time frame. Best way to find a soulmate? Probably not. But you are looking for fun you probably dont care if you have the same
musical tastes or opinions about classic Russian literature. If you have, or can build, the stones to
approach repeatedly, you can hook up a lot. The high number of at-bats also serves to diminish
the sting from any one rejection. Picking out the one girl in the bar a la Babe Ruths called shot
makes her blow-off quite a bit more painful (particularly after rehearsing your brilliant lines in the
car!) Again, silly and counterproductive. Nightclubs are not for sniper rifle approaches, they are
for Uzis and Tommy Guns. All the best guys Ive ever seen in clubs (including the majority of
professional pickup coaches) were, at the end of the day, largely playing a numbers game.
In part two we looked at the demographics and psychology of club girls. This will of course inform
how we approach them. Club girls dont want to be known as club girls and they certainly dont
want to be viewed as interchangeable sex organs. So what do they want to be known for? Ive
found a significant number of them have artistic or creative interests. Weve already mentioned
that appearance-based jobs and interests abound in this demographic. They often view these
endeavors hair-styling, fashion, etc as artistic (and they are). The woman who cuts my hair
calls it her art. Sometimes they are interested in writing, painting, or photography. If you can
engage on these creative topics and speak intelligently about them you can often connect with
these girls. Youd be very surprised how many club girls in Hollywood enjoy going to LACMA.
Another effect of their focus on appearance is that they are going to be less forgiving about yours.
A girl who spends every day reading food labels, counting calories, reading about diets and
working out is going to wonder what your excuse is for being 20 pounds overweight. The good
news is that although we often think of looks as something immutable, they arent. You dont need
to have a perfectly chiseled Jon Hamm jaw line to be good looking. Much of being good looking is
just being fit. If you are muscular and sub-10% body fat, unless you look like Shane MacGowan,
chances are you are going to be good looking. Add in solid grooming and a cool haircut and you
are now ready for the women of clubs. And these are all things you can control.
The same goes for your clothing. Club girls spend a lot of time thinking about fashion and looking
their best. A wrinkled, vertically stripped button down from 2001 isnt going to cut it. Put some real
thought into your look and make things easier on yourself.
Beyond putting effort into your appearance and approaching, picking up girls in clubs is less
about what you do and more about what you dont do.
Dont insult her 6 years of bad pickup artists telling girls they are hot but not that hot or that her
perfume smells like tuna fish has brought nice guys a little more back in vogue. Shes had enough
guys trying too hard to tease her into submission that a normal conversation is likely to be
refreshing.
Dont use money to impress her If a girl has gone out for more than a week then shes had guys
blatantly brag or use money as a means to convince her to like him. If you have read this site you
already know all the obvious reasons why this wont work. Let her found out how baller you later,
Rockefeller.
Dont smile too much A study of internet dating showed that women prefer pensive or brooding
men over smiling ones. I think this goes doubly in person, where the visceral feeling of someone
wanting something from you is often triggered from a smile and overly effusive greeting. You need
to smile a bit to avoid scaring or creeping her out but after that keep it in check.
Dont overestimate your competition If there are two key things that Ive learned in all my time in
clubs its that women look vastly different during the day than at night and that no one with
anything going on in their lives is spending significant time in clubs. Most guys envision their
competition as wealthy, famous, international men of mystery and nothing could be further from
the truth. While the rich and famous occasionally frequent these places, most guys that women
will meet are 30k millionaires, drunk meatheads, and douchebags who cant shut up about how
hot she is (Ive also found most girls dont like the word hot). Trust me when I tell you that real
people with money or real status are found few and far between in nightclubs.
Dont assume I harped on this before but its worth repeating. If you think you can look at a girl
across the bar and know what kind of girl she is, whether shes promiscuous or pious, smart or
dumb, on drugs or a teetotaler, lets me save you a lot of time. You dont know shit. Ive met
Ph.Ds, doctors, world-saving philanthropists, writers, and Harvard MBAs in nightclubs. Ive had
women quote Shakespeare and talk about the debt crisis. Making assumptions about any one girl
from the outside is mental masturbation, period. Leave your stereotypes at the door.
Other Considerations
Loud Noises Guys often complain that its too loud in clubs. I can ALWAYS shout into a girls ear
loud enough for her to hear it. The bigger issue is the energy and attention. Its hard to captivate a
girl with what you are saying when your competition is a club going off. But its done every night
so dont let this be an excuse. As far as the volume, most clubs have areas, usually smoking
areas, that are relatively quiet. You can post up there.
Dancing Some guys think dancing is required at clubs. While its useful to be able to handle a
little two-step in rhythm or at least be able to grind effectively, its definitely not required. No one is
expecting you to breakout a You Got Served routine or something you saw on Dancing With the
Stars. In fact, one of the best club pick up artists I ever saw was staunchly anti-dancing. The king
doesnt dance, he said. Make no mistake, you can pick up in a club without ever dancing.
Facebook Once again, the role of social media cant be ignored when approaching, meeting,
and dating the women you meet in nightclubs. Helen Fisher, biological anthropologist and
foremost expert on romantic love, posits that the internet and social networking add a more
natural element to meeting strangers by offering insights into their personalities and social
connections beyond what one would know from meeting someone in a bar. While Im not sure
thats what club girls have in mind when they look you up on Facebook, I do know that no matter
how good your game is if she looks you up and you have 12 friends and one picture of yourself in
the bathroom mirror, your number will be deleted faster than you can say Friendster. Club girls
use Facebook frequently so a good profile and a few friends in common can give her the comfort
she needs to meet up with you outside the club.
Last Call
Despite all its foibles, nightlife is popular for a reason. The crowds can be annoying, the people
can be vapid, and the drinks can be expensive (bring a flask). But at the end of the day there are
few places that engage a mans senses quite like a club. The music, the friends, the drinks, and
of course, the women. Yes, the women, done up like dolls, skirts hiked, hugging their feminine
curves. Young and hopeful and fun, unspoiled by the weight of unmet expectations. Nights out
are the ones you remember. For all their pains, clubs offer an opportunity. When youre 40 and
out of the game you wont remember Brenda the girl you winked at on Match.com and went on a
handful of reasonable dates with. Youll remember the twins in Miami, the ride in the empty 5 train
to her place in SoHo, the bouncer that threw you out of the bathroom stall for trying to drag a girl
into it, and the moment when a beautiful girl said yes to you for the first time. So drink up and
enjoy. The next round is on me.
Xander resides in West Hollywood, CA where he still, occasionally, goes clubbing.
==============================================================
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Nightclub Promoter
Name: Xander
Location:
Hollywood, CA
Gender:
M
Age:
32
I promoted at several of Hollywoods hottest clubs during a period of unemployment, mainly to
see what all of the fuss was about. While it was fun and definitely had its perks, it also confirmed
quite a few of the suspicions and stereotypes Id previously held about how the industry works.
Ask me anything!
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Q
Is bottle service worth the money?
Asked by linebreaker on 01/05/2012
A
Bottle service is awesome ... as long as someone else is paying for it. It's a pretty expensive way
to get self-esteem. But if you have a couple of friends who drink and run up bar tabs then maybe
the premium of bottle service isn't that bad as long as you keep it to one bottle. But once that runs
out, so will any chicks at your table.
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Q
You mentioned Mexicans and Persians in an earlier post -- what other ethnicities do club owners
dislike?
Asked by Hiram on 01/05/2012
A
Let me say first say that I don't have a problem with anyone. Every ethnicity is welcome at my
house. Clubs, however, are more racist than old Southerners.
In the words of Chris Rock, "If it's all white, it's alright." Clubs would prefer to not have too much
of any ethnicity other than white, lest their club become known as "the Asian club, etc" The
sterotype for Persians, and again I am pointing out the sterotype not my personal opinion, is that
they are rude and obnoxious and scare off the women by being too aggressive and reacting
angrily when rejected. Perhaps it's endemic to LA but that's what it is. Clubs with heavily Hispanic
or African- American clientle are thought to be prone to violence.
Q
What's the most original stunt you've seen someone attempt when trying to get into your club?
Asked by prkchp on 01/05/2012
A
If there's one thing people standing on the other side of the velvet rope aren't, it's original. The
same things are said:
"But my friends are in there" (and they ditched you? Shitty friends)
"But I'm on the list" (weird, I don't see Dickhead listed here)
"It's my friend's birthday" (there's always Facebook)
"I know the owner" (not well enough, apparently)
The best story is my own. Before promoting I once hired a high-end escort to walk me in. I didn't
go online and call her up. She just happened to be at the hotel bar we were pre-partying in. I paid
her $50 to walk in with me to the nearby club. I'm sure it was the easiest money she made that
night.
You may also like: Bouncer, Bartender, Las Vegas Cab Driver, Pick-Up Coach
Q
Assuming I'm a guy on a modest budget and can't afford bottle service, what can I do to increase
my chances of getting into a hot club?
Asked by Davey on 01/05/2012
A
Plan ahead. Know how hot (or not) the venue is. Get there early, brings girls if you can. Dress
appropriately. Be nice to the bouncer but not too nice. Don't throw a tantrum; it looks retarded. Be
ready to grease. Sneak in a flask so your money is spent getting in and not on overpriced drinks.
Q
How much can a club promoter make in a year?
Asked by Orange on 01/05/2012
A
It varies quite a bit but I'd say a decent mid-level promoter makes about $25K per year. Most of
them have other things they do on the side - usually acting or personal training. Sometimes
dealing drugs. Many of the lower level promoters are involved in scam or almost scam industries
like payday loans, pre-paid legal services, mortgage loan modifications, multi-level marketing, etc
because they aren't real 9-5 jobs and allow the flexibility to go out during the week. Sketched out
yet?
Mid to high level promoters can make from 60-100k. The top of the food chain can make 150k200k+ believe it or not. All for pouring liquor down chicks throats.
Q
Has anyone ever taken a swing at you (or the bouncer, or whoever was controlling the door)
when they were unable to get into the club?
Asked by onefiftyone on 01/05/2012
A
I've personally never seen it because I worked mostly classy places. But there have definitely
been incidents particularly as the clubs start attracting the less-optimal crowd. I can remember
specifically a bouncer being shot and killed at a club called Vanguard a couple years ago
Q
Ever see (or hear about) a girl do something "compromising" for a bouncer or promoter to get into
their club?
Asked by Scrilla1 on 01/05/2012
A
Ha! This made me laugh. Um, yes this one time, every weekend, at every club, ever.
I've rarely heard of quid pro quo situations. Girls are getting into the club anyway if they are cute
and not if they aren't. They certainly don't need to do anything "compromising" but do they
anyway. Frequently. Short of being famous or paying for it, being a promoter is the easiest way to
get laid ever. It's obscenely easy, like you'd have to actively try not to have sex like some sort of
monk. I've never been a bouncer but I've seen women throwing themselves at them so i know it's
same story. Lots of General Manager's offices (in the club) have a mattress or a couch and you
can imagine what those are for.
My promoting partner would hook up with 2-4 new girls a month without ever going on what
normal ...More
Q
Who are considered to be the 1-2 "Hall of Fame" club promoters of all time?
Asked by Sammie on 01/05/2012
A
This might come as a surprise to you but club people aren't big on history, myself included.
Although I like the idea of a club promoter Hall of Fame. Like it would have framed Ed Hardy
shirts from 2008 and a hall of coke vials used by the rich and almost famous. Maybe an artist's
rendition of the first bathroom stall sex circa 1961. I'm going to look into this.
If you are looking for club history, the movie 24 Hour Party People is a pretty good one.
Q
Is there a hierarchy for club promoters?
Asked by boogieboard on 01/05/2012
A
There is definitely a hierarchy. At the top are the promoters that deal directly with club. They are a
known brand and bring the "right" people (read: white people, hot girls, Hollywood hipsters, lowlevel celebs). The promoting team will be small and often consist of trust-fund kids. At the bottom
are ethnic promoters with ethnic crowds. They are like cattle herders, just trying to bring the most
people through the door who are willing to pay cover. Being a promoter is very much a chickenand-egg type of thing because to get hired by good venues you need a good crowd and to get a
good crowd you need to be already promoting good venues.
There are really two ways a promoter can move up the hierarchy. One is to start at the bottom
working for a club that is looking for more business. They'll ...More
Q
Have you seen anything particularly innovative at newer clubs, or is it the same loud music /
overpriced drinks / greasy hair / mini-skirt set-up everywhere?
Asked by heartkill on 01/05/2012
A
The vibes differ a little but it's all pretty much the same. Bottle service is a relatively new
phenomenon and unfortunately looks to be here to stay. The smaller, speakeasy type of place
has grown in popularity but without significant bottle service money it's a tough business model.
Douchebags and dumb girls aren't going anywhere as far as I can tell.
And most of all, reading these answers back to myself makes me kind of ashamed how much I
know about it. Pour me a drink.
Q
To get people to come to your promoted club events, did you just email blast everyone you know
or post on Facebook, or were there other, less obvious ways to bring people in?
Asked by ChiefAli on 01/11/2012
A
Take a giant sherpard's crook and go to the nearest fashion school. Round 'em up and hand them
bottles.
No actually mass texting is the promoters tool. You collect phone numbers by any means
necessary, group them by how attractive they are (seriously) and text blast away. Facebook and
email is also used although the former has a tendancy to get lost in the mix and the latter is
primarily effective for holidays (e.g. Halloween, New Year's Eve).
Q
How do you decide who gets into your nightclub?
Asked by stilz on 01/05/2012
A
None of this will come as a surprise to anyone who has gone out in Hollywood more than once.
Whatever you think of it as an outsider, it's much worse as an insider. The club's General
Manager will explicitly tell promoters that there were too many Mexicans or Persians or fat chicks.
Most places in LA don't even bother with the illusion of a line anymore. It's just a mass of people
at the front and the door girl/guy or bouncer hand picks who comes in. Hot girls have first priority
obviously. There is a preference for white and especially blonde. I've seen them wave a group of
girls in and then when they get to the fat one in the group, pull the rope in front of her. Being
dressed well helps for both guys and girls. Theyre loathe to let guys in because they know the
frustration of not getting ...More

Q
What prompted you to get involved in club promotion? Money? Power? Chicks? All of the above?
Asked by ishtar on 01/05/2012
A
I went out a lot and wanted to be on the other side of the rope. I was unemployed at the time so it
seemed like a natural fit. And yes, also I wanted to have sex with hot club girls.
Q
What's the typical lifespan of a nightclub?
Asked by slimshady99 on 01/05/2012
A
It ranges from less than a year to as much as four years, typically. The average is probably two.
Les Deux in Hollywood lasted five years which is the longest I've ever heard of. Much depends on
the size of the place. The bigger the place, the more people they have to fill it with and the less
discerning they can be. This accelerates a club's demise. It's not a coincidence that the places
that had staying power, like Hyde, were small.
Q
If a new club is trying to make a name for itself, will they ever go as far as actually *hiring* hot
girls to hang out there (like the seat-fillers at the Oscars)?
Asked by SouljahBoi on 01/09/2012
A
Definitely. Although it's usually the promoters that hire the girls, and the clubs just hire the
promoters. I've seen clubs / parties do the hiring, usually for one-off parties or day time events.
Q
What's the craziest hook-up situation promoting got you into? 3 girls at once?
Asked by MrMr on 02/16/2012
A
I wasn't in it long enough for a foursome. I've had some fun but not like a lot of longer-time
promoters I knew who could really tell you some stories.
Q
What, in your opinion, is the most underrated city in terms of clubbing? We obviously hear about
LA/Vegas/NY all the time -- any less obvious places that would surprise most people?
Asked by Tim on 01/05/2012
A
Everyone and their mother tells me about how great Austin, TX is. It's like The Wire of cities. I've
never been so I can't say. Ditto for Reykjavik, Iceland.
I've been to some great clubs overseas in places like Mykonos, Paris, and Rio. I think Toronto is
pretty good too. As far as U.S. cities, I think the LA/NY/Miami/Vegas quartet has the well
deserved reputation of the good megaclubs. But it depends on what you're looking for. I have a
friend who swears that Latvia is the place to be. And I just returned from Thailand which was a
little disappointing nightlife-wise.
Q
Let's say I'm a guy who shows up on a Friday night with a buddy ... and no girls. How much would
it cost to grease my way in?
Asked by HenryR on 01/05/2012
A
It varies greatly by how tough the venue is and what you look like. I've greased as little as $10
and as much as $50 (that's per person). But I dress well when I go out and don't bring any
Middle-Eastern friends. If you dress poorly or of an *ahem* undesirable ethnicity then it'll be more
or less impossible. The bouncer is usually calculating how much crap he's going to get if he lets
you in. Alternatively you can grease the promoter to walk you in with his group of girls. He'll be
doing the same mental calculation as the bouncer. I've even grabbed girls as they were walking
up to the venue and offered to buy them drinks once inside. They aren't as good because of their
tendency to ditch guys once the bouncer looks at them sideways.
Q
Do promoters or club owners ever get sued for racial discrimination?
Asked by jeez louize on 01/05/2012
A
Yes although never successfully. As you can imagine, it's a hard thing to prove.
More common is sexual discrimination, when men sue over getting charged when women aren't.
This has mixed results. The practice of charging cover charge to men and not women has been
successfully opposed and although the practice is still common, clubs have had to pony up and
sue disgruntled guys. Courts however have upheld "Ladies Night" where girls get to take
advantage of drink specials that the boys don't.
Q
What's the craziest thing you've ever "accepted" in exchange for entry?
Asked by YMCA on 02/13/2012
A
A drink from a girl... in all my time as a promoter it was the first and last time a girl has ever paid
for anything.
Q
How is promoter compensation calculated? I have heard varying answers from the number of
people brought in, a percentage of bottle sales, and even a percentage of bar sales.
Asked by kipnir on 09/04/2012
A
All are true. The lower-tiered clubs that depend on everyone paying cover will usually pay their
promoters based on heads coming thru the door. Most promoters get a share of the bottle sales
they bring in (usually 20%). And percentage of bar sales is pretty common, much more so in
smaller clubs. Like everything in life, just depends on how much leverage and bargaining power
the promoter has.
But let's be honest, the real promoter compensation is lips, hips and fingertips.
Q
Starting from scratch, how did you first get a club to pay you to promote (and give you a table to
host), and how did you start building a list of girls to bring out at night?
Asked by nyc on 08/28/2012
A
There's 2 ways to get a club to hire you. One is to find a club that is just looking to get bodies
through the door, without regard for too much quality. They'll give you a shot for a week or 2 and if
you perform, they'll keep you.
The 2nd, and by far easier way, is to find a promoter doing a good club and offer to "sub" for him
(meaning become a sub-promoter). Now you work for him and the girls you bring count on his
tally. Eventually he'll start paying you and if you do really well, you can go out on your own. It's
kind of like being a drug dealer. You start out as Bodie and end up as Avon Barksdale (if you're
really lucky / ruthless)
In either scenario, you better be bringing girls or your career will be short. How to get them? By
hook or by crook. Facebook is the preferred method now ...More
Q
What would you typically charge a bar for you to promote through their facebook? (i.e. run their
facebook & twitter page & promote their events)
Asked by brittanyloomis1 on 02/07/2013
A
They don't hire promoters for that. Some of the biggest companies hire firms that specialize in
social media to do that, but most aren't big on promoting that way. It takes away from the word-ofmouth coolness.
Q
Im 16 & female (located in the UK), i want to be a nightclub promoter or a podium dancer part
time when im 18. I love dancing, im lively, fun and fairly confident... im a very social person when
im in that enviroment. How old do you have to be?
Asked by Sophie on 03/02/2013
A
Stay in school
Q
What makes a nightclub fail?

Asked by 4tris on 02/07/2013
A
A weak opening
Q
How DO you convince people to come to whatever club you're promoting at? What's the selling
point beyond "It's gonna be crazy!"
Asked by brikhaus on 02/04/2013
A
Drugs. No I'm kidding. Kind of.
It's really like any personal/concierge service. You get people coming by investing in their
experience and cultivating personal relationships. This might mean getting them hookups in
different cities, discounts on restaurants around town, invites to cool private parties, or just free
drinks at your table. Also can mean hanging out with these people (gasp!) during the day.
Q
What's the correct way to grease a promoter? Should I do the money-in-handshake thing, or is
that just something they do in movies?
Asked by Smitty MD on 02/01/2013
A
Believe or not, it is the money-in-handshake thing, usually combined with a half-bro hug. Other
times it's literally just handing over discretely. Anything other than waving it hyperactively in front
of his face works.
Discretion is not as important with promoters as it is with bouncers
Q
Why aren't there more female club promoters? Seems like they'd be better at getting guys to buy
bottle service and bringing in other females ...
Asked by 21redrum on 02/02/2013
A
Au contraire, mon frre
If there's one thing 22-year old club going girls DON'T want it's female competition. They don't
even like the "friends" they came with, much less some chick with a clipboard with more social
status than them. No matter what they say, women go to clubs (at least in the US) not to hang out
with their friends or even to meet a guy. They go to play a social status game. And female
promoters throw a wrench in that.
And they certainly don't help bring guys in. The guys are dumb but the gel hasn't seeped deep
enough into their cerebrums to make them think that their best shot is with a female promoter.
That's what bottle girls are for.
And why would the girl want to do it? This isn't Michelle Obama deciding between the ...More
Q
Thanks! One follow up. You said, "Discretion is not as important as if it's a bouncer." Why is that?
Asked by Smitty, M.D. on 02/01/2013
A
Edited the original to be coherent.
Discretion is important with bouncers but not as much as promoters for a couple of reasons. One
is that bouncers are actually employees of the club whereas promoters are quasi-contractors,
usually informal ones. So the bouncer has more of a duty to the club. Another is proximity; the
bouncer is usually standing right next to his boss so taking a grease looks bad. A promoter can
wander around the club, the line, the parking lot, wherever. So you can actually grease him 40
feet away from anyone's prying eyes. And lastly, the promoter is responsible for his crowd so if he
decides it's important that a few dudes gets in whether because they are friends or they paid him,
the club will usually give him a little bit a slack. Bouncers on the other hand ...More
Q
Are "ladies nights" effective? Are clubs doing them less frequently now that there have been a
bunch of discrimination lawsuits?
Asked by AZmiguel on 02/05/2013
A
Ladies nights are very effective.....for getting chubby chicks HAMMERED. In a town like LA that
caters to high end clubs rather than your neighborhood wet t-shirt contest bar/pub, discounted or
free drinks for women is pretty pointless - they aren't paying for drinks anyway.
Q
What's the right girl-to-guy ratio for a nightclub?
Asked by Caleb C on 02/06/2013
A
99% women, 1% high end bottle service (men)
Q
Why do nightclubs have dress codes? Doesn't the cover charge weed out the riff raff?
Asked by chinzio_L on 02/05/2013
A
Definitely not. Even riff raff is willing to pony up $20 to grind their boners on some drunk girls.
A club is an image business. That means pretty, well-dressed people.
Q
How old is too old for guys to be at a club?
Asked by unsane on 02/20/2013
A
You're only as old as the women you feel.
Q
Can you give a time schedule on what your average day is like
Asked by Anthony on 03/06/2013
A
10am - introduce myself to the girl sleeping next to me
Ha, I'm half joking
Keep in mind, I'm currently retired from the nightlife business. My button-up shirt is matted and
hanging from the rafters and my scarfs and rings are gathering dust in my closet.
When you first start out you are just hustling. You spend all day on facebook trying to engage girls
and get them out, you shop for clothes in your spare time so you can look cool and you think
about your clever text that you are going to send.
As you build a client base and more of a reputation, you spend more time hanging out during the
day with your girls to keep those relationships strong (and most of them don't work regular jobs
either so they are free and bored during the week) and going to meetings with the club ...More
Q
Hey there...so I have bartending experience and went to school for bartending. I want to be a
bartender or a bottle girl at a club in hollywood. Im 22 years old, and look the part. How do I get
in?
Asked by Faith on 12/19/2012
A
Apply in person. Dress well and look the part when you go. They are hiring you based on your
look above all else. It helps if you have service experience (even at Applebee's) but not essential.
Q
Im 17 years old i live in New York, and I want to open up a nightclub. Any suggestions or tips?
Plus I want to start my own clothing line too.
Asked by Leo on 02/16/2013
A
Get a job at a bar or club. You need to learn the business from the inside and make the
relationships that will help you later. Nightclubs have huge startup costs so you better have rich
parents.
Clothing line is a terrible business
Q
Can an 18 year old be a promoter in the NYC area?
Asked by Ray on 03/06/2013

A
I believe just for 18 and over clubs. Unclear how strict they will be about it.
I suggest doing something better with your life.
Q
How did you manage to bring a good amount of people to the clubs every weekend? Don't you
run out of people to invite at some point?
Asked by sensito on 04/01/2013
A
Despite what looks to me a pretty crappy experience, people are still going clubbing. I personally
prefer OKcupid or a night burning off my leg hairs with a lighter but that's just me. I'm old. There
are always new faces fresh off the bus from Oklahoma ready to put on that black mini, drink free
Grey Goose, and make out with the D-level reality TV "star" that got paid to show up.
Also keep in mind promoters cast a wide net. There might be 5000-8000 numbers in their phone.
Someone is coming out. And when you get to that point, your list grows organically by reputation.
Q
Hey I hope you can respond. i am currently in the process of becoming a VIP Host for a high end
nightclub in Hollywood, What specifically would you suggest me to do, for me to be able to pull a
large college girl crowd ASAP?You said fashion schools?
Asked by Rich on 02/28/2013
A
By VIP host I assume you mean promoter and not bottle service. In LA, the girls of FIDM
(Fashion Institute of Design and Merch) make up a good portion of the club going population.
They're young, they're into dressing up and going out, and they essentially go to an all girls
school. It's the perfect storm.
Other than that, I would utilize facebook. A lot of promoters organize sorority outings to clubs. Can
be OK but they can sloppy off Popov pre-parties.
Q
Have you ever seen "the little guy" win at the door? Like someone who'd just had it and bitchslapped a bouncer, promoter, list-b*tch, etc?
Asked by 4onthefloor on 10/18/2012
A
In club-life, like in real life, "the little guy" rarely wins
Q
would you ever let your own daughter work in the nightclub business?
Asked by bluesyde on 03/03/2013
A
Hold on the thought of having a daughter just scared me for a second......ok I'm back.
Luckily for my potential future daughter, I don't live in culture where she would need to have
family's permission to do something. If she's an adult, she can make her own decision. I would tell
her the same thing I would tell a son....do it for awhile but don't stay too long. Also stay away from
promoters, those guys are the worst.
Q
We have a club outside a military base and there is a big shortage of good looking women for our
ladies contests that we run, any tips on were to find hot women to recruit for the club contests?
Asked by Del on 02/11/2013
A
Maybe contests aren't your forte then. Cheap beer might be better alternative.
Q
You stated that it's easier to grease up the promoters than the bouncers, but how do you
differentiate between the promoters who can actually get you in and the ones who can't?
Asked by Seraphis on 03/05/2013
A
Promoters will tell you if they can get you in up front and before any money is exchanged. If not,
are you sure that's the promoter? Could be the valet.
Q
are you aware of any clubs that said screw it and tried an all inclusive approach. did it just bomb
miserably ?
Asked by ca291 on 03/27/2013
A
There are many. It can work under the right circumstances like if you cater to a specific audience,
say Electronic Dance Music. Host a megaclub club, charge everyone a cover and spend for big
name DJ's.
Vegas is of course the ultimate all inclusive.
Q
Hi! I have an interview tomorrow to be a VIP host/ promoter in a couple of clubs in Hollywood , do
you know how much is the rate or paid per person in los Angeles area? Or what is the estimate
payment per person and bottle service?
Asked by lhca1234 on 06/21/2013
A
Minimum wage plus commissions on bottles for a VIP host. Hope it went well.
Q
How often how often do promoters bring in underage (18-20 yr old) girls? Is it easy, and do you
make more money that way?
Asked by nyc on 03/31/2013
A
It happens. The ease depends on a lot of the things like how shady the owners are, how hot the
girls are, and how believable her fake ID from Deleware is
Q
I am interested in becoming a club promoter here in Los Angeles, CA. How and where do I start.
Asked by Justin on 03/20/2013
A
See my answer above to the question that starts with "Starting From Stratch...."
Q
How do you come up with a percentage of the bar and should it be after a certain amount the bar
has made?
Asked by missy on 02/25/2013
A
The club usually offers it and it's not like you have a lot of negotiating room. And yes, it's usually
after a certain threshold is met.
Q
ever seen a door guy tell someone straight up that they're too fat or ugly to get in? how does
someone even react to something like that?
Asked by chuck silva on 03/24/2013
A
Not in the US but I recently saw it in Australia. There were two lines to the place. The bouncer
was shouting at the top of his lungs "Beautiful people only in the this line! Beautiful people only!"
then he shined a flashlight in a girl's face and said "Are you beautiful?" and after assessing her,
told her stand in the regular line. Her eyes started to well up and she left.
Seperately at another place in the same city, I saw bouncer inform a guy that he wouldn't be
getting in because he had a Brazilian ID and the club had had a "problem with Brazilians being
too aggressive with the women". The guy had waited over an hour and the place was a gross
mess of grinding and people who were way too drunk.
Totally classless in both cases.
Q
I'm thinking about just moving to Vegas and start promoting, any suggestions on how to get
started and work my way up?
Asked by Al on 03/06/2013
A
Drugs. Lots of drugs. I'm half joking.

Vegas is it's own animal. They have less of need for promoters because everyone is from out of
town so they don't care that much about repeat business. As a result curating the crowd takes a
back seat to packing 'em in. And the start up / capital cost of a Vegas club is so great that they
couldn't do that anyway. They've got to run people through and charge them all cover.
The promoters I know that have done Vegas do it for special events or have graduated to dealing
primarily with ballers so they actually have something to offer a Vegas club that the club can't do
on it's own, namely people to drop 20k in a night.
I would suggest reading a recent GQ article called "The Best Night $500,000 Can Buy"
Q
do clubs ever get protested by feminist leagues, anti rape orgnizations, that kind of thing?
Asked by annie burns on 03/29/2013
A
Ha, I've never seen it but the idea of a bouncer flashing a light in the face of a short-haired Vassar
alum screaming about rape culture makes me laugh.
Q
What can you do to make your Facebook more appealing so that girls that you don't know will
want to go out with you? Thanks.
A
If you need me to tell you how to be cool, we're off to a bad start.
Find a good promoter's facebook and you'll see. The promoter is selling first and foremost an
(imaginary) lifestyle and secondariliy his own sex appeal. So good party pictures (filtered through
Instagram to look even cooler) and shot of yourself impeccably dressed will go along way.
Q
Should a promoter be held accountable for liabilty during the night of his event.
Asked by Alias on 04/10/2013
A
Ha! No. The club isn't even really liable for most things and they have insurance (which costs a
fortune) for the things they are liable for. If a promoter was held liable for the actions of 2000
drunk and potentially drugged-up bozos, no one would ever do the job.
Q
Is it better to be a nightclub promoter, or a nightclub owner?
Asked by jason k. on 04/07/2013
A
Would you rather own the Lakers or be the 12th guy on the bench that gets the clap 3 times a
year?
Q
Have you ever found the pickup artist methods to ever have worked in a club setting as they so
claim? or is it just a numbers game when it comes to club pickups even after 1AM?
Asked by sexymofo on 04/23/2013
A
Clubs in LA were littered with PUA's for quite some time. Any girl who had been out more than a
few times was familiar with the techniques (most notably, asking an opinion on something).
I unfortunately met most of the instructors and most of them were frauds. Their best techinique
was apparently having really low standards.
That said, I've seen it work and in some rare cases work very well but I attribute it to a placebo
effect (the guy thinks it's going to work so the confidence makes it so) and just plain volume.
Q
How do I meet a promoter who can get us hooked up at a specific club on short notice (1-2
weeks)? My girlfriends and I want to check out hot spots like LAVO, Le Bain, Cielo, etc, but we're
all new to the NYC nightlife scene.
Asked by NYC Chick on 04/21/2013
A
I suggest facebook. Do searches for those places and look on their walls to see who is liking or
commenting. Find attractive women and see who is commenting and liking on a lot of their pages
(they will likely be promoters).
Then again, if you are hot enough, just show up.
Q
Have you ever promoted a strip club and if so what method of marketing did you use?
Asked by Sweet Bee on 04/14/2013
A
Strip clubs don't use promoters the way nightclubs do. Even the guy with the mullet and the Stone
Cold Steve Austin tshirt gets in. I don't get it...if you want to be entertained by a naked lady, go on
the internet. If you want to pay someone to pretend to like you, get married.
Q
What does a promoter mean when he is going to hook you on an open bar tab? Free drinks all
night or will I have to pay for everyone's drinks at the end of the night?
Asked by Michelle on 04/11/2013
A
Hi Michelle, since you are a girl there is no chance the promoter expects you to pay anything.
Assuming he has half a clue. Open bar tab is free drinks. Free drinks are in fact the chief benefit
of being a girl so enjoy. I'll be over here paying for my drinks and enjoying my superior physical
strength and earning power.

Q
Lets just assume that I've some money to spend, how would I get the easiest way inside a club
being what you call a undesirable ethnicity, badly dressed and all?
A
Buy nice clothes, try to bring girls if you can, grease the bouncer. If all else fails, buy botttle
service.
Q
How many bottles would be standard for a group of 15-20 girls for a bachelorette party? We plan
on doing bottle service. I'm just not sure how many we should start off with
Asked by Katie on 04/25/2013
A
How many are overweight?
Q
Sam Nazarian, A PERSIAN, is the CEO of SBE. SBE owns most exclusive clubs in LA, Vegas,
Miami , and New York. it just wouldn't make sense that he'll be racist against his own race. So
why are you racist and full of shit? why you jealous?
Asked by BigDick on 05/14/2013
A
I believe they call that "irony"
Thanks for the question BigDick.
Q
What is standard % of liquor sales to request?
Asked by Geedup 64 on 05/02/2013
A
Varies widely depending on how much leverage you have. Like most things in life.
Q
Is clubs a good place to pickup girl as opposed to other places with girls and if so, how do you put
your best foot forward?
A
I could write a book as an answer to this.
Overall I think if you have certain advantages, looks chief among them, clubs can be pretty
decent places.
Best foot forward...put a lot of effort into your appearance. This means being in really good shape,
lots of thought into your clothes and style, and a cool haircut. Getting to know people in nightlife
(promoters, etc). And most of all build thick skin. Finding love in a club is a numbers game.
Q
I need party promoter. We are having very interesting private parties but we need spacial people
to join us.
if you can help me just email at; ericricci.couture@yahoo.com
Asked by Eric on 06/03/2013
A
Enjoy the spam email
Q
What is the most amount of bottles you have seen ONE table get in a single night?
Asked by Diabolik on 05/06/2013
A
6. They were Persian.
Q
what's a good way to find a goood catchy name for my partner and i?
Asked by sheena on 05/28/2013
A
I suggest Goood
Q
my bestfriend's sis is gorgeous half-brazilian girl & since she was 17 (i was 15) has led this lavish
lifestyle of travel (miami, ny, vegas, maui), parties, having random hot girl friends & expensive
clothes. their fam is NOT rich.. (tb-continued)..
Asked by marie from austin tx on 07/03/2013
A
......i'm pretty sure this girl doesn't sleep around but she did become a bartender at 18 and does it
sometimes. can you write out a how-to list for attractive girls that want to live the same lifestyle?
i'm 20 and have a fake id."
You're kidding yourself if you don't think she sleeps around. That lifestyle only goes so far until
you have to pay the piper.
There's no to-do list except maybe move to LA, NY or Miami. Look hot, got out a lot, if you are
attractive enough, the rest comes to you.
Stay in school kids
Q
I live in LA, work full time in the medical field, and looking to break up the Monotony of my job for
a bit. I know/party with some hosts at Bootsy, Emerson, AV, etc. Would it be inappropriate to ask
to start working with them?
Asked by Marc on 05/16/2013
A
Not at all. Ask if they need subpromoters. Just be sure to deliver when called upon.
I went to Emerson last week...nice looking club.
Q
I've noticed that 9/10 girls on fb or any social media ignore you even if you offer free drinks and
and free entry at some of the most upscale nightclubs. Did you have any social media strategies?
Thanks.
A
This means your facebook profile isn't cool enough. It's not about free drinks or entry, it's about
whether they want to actually hang out with you. Do you think girls have any trouble getting free
drinks or free entry without you?
Q
You have to decorate the club according to the kind of party you going to have ? that matters at
all?
Asked by Elgrande on 05/02/2013
A
Nope
Q
I have an interview for team lead promoter in vegas for angel management group is there any
advice you can give any advice before my interview? What should I say or what are some
questions i can expect them to ask me?
Asked by ken702176 on 05/16/2013
A
Sorry not familiar with them. I wouldn't expect them to ask you anything too complicated beside
"where da hoes at?"
Q
Im an 18 year old DJ in LA and started going to clubs last year. I really want to DJ in clubs. How
would i DJ in clubs in LA? Do i have to know the promoter etc? Whats the best way?
Asked by GI on 05/10/2013
A
I'm not a well versed in the DJ scene. I do know most of the DJ's in LA clubs have DJ agents that
get them gigs. Your best bet is to meet some LA based DJ's and ask. I don't think knowing
promoters helps much.
Q
I'm starting to do a little promoting for Monday Night Social recently moved to Sound Nightclub.
I'm not really interested in the promoting but I can personally bring in artists. What's the best way
to spread my name for door sales?
Asked by Marc on 06/03/2013
A
I'm not sure what spreading your name for door sales means. Promoters only know about
spreading legs for bottle service.
Q
Is there anything about the nightlife experience/industry as a whole (not just clubs) that you feel
could be improved? Particularly with the use of technology. Anything that made you think, there
has to be a better way..?
Asked by Alexander on 06/12/2013
A
Yeah...forgoing it all together in favor of online dating.
Q
I'm 23 just moved to nyc, know about 10 people so far... i think i have the looks and personality
for promoting... but real talk- is it possible to do this without sleeping around or getting into the
drug scene?
Asked by nycbitch on 07/01/2013
A
You don't need to do either as a promoter to succeed. But you will need to know more than 10
people
Female promoters never last long. See my previous answer to the question that starts with "Why
arent' there more female promoters?"
Q
what is expected as a bottle girl? i'm 22 work in a bank in NY and some of my friends are in this i
actually want to do it to make money and help my mom out. Any advice? should i? btw i weigh
110 pounds and no boob job, think i got a chance? ha -__Asked by Michelle.Her on 06/14/2013
A
Bottle girl requirements:
- Look hot
The end
Big boobs help but not required
Q
I'm not sure if this is the correct site to ask this question. I have a friend who is an upcoming actor
and has appeared in several movies. How do I begin to get him appearances in nightclubs to sign
autographs or host events?
Asked by Lynette on 06/11/2013
A
He needs an agent, who will book those kind of things.
Q
How much should I charge a popular night club in atlanta to promote their club? What are usually
the rates?
Asked by kuzzinkel on 05/08/2013
A
For the most part you don't set the rates, the club does. You don't have much leverage as a
promoter so at the beginning at least, you take what you can get. Good luck.
Q
i just got a job as a bottle service girl. I said I had over two years of experience and ive actually
never done it. Can you give me a run down of what a night looks like as a bottle service girl?
Asked by jenn on 05/08/2013
A
You lied, which is a good start to work in an industry that is based on lies. Good job.
It's pretty simple. Fit in to a corsett, put on loads of makeup and flirt with skeezy guys. And
occasionally pour drinks for them. Don't sweat it, it's not balancing the federal budget and they'll
fill you in on exactly what they expect of you.
Q
As mentioned earlier, I am looking to break up the monotony of my day job. I'm an attractive
female and live in LA. I have no interest in promoting: if I want to work at a nightclub, what are my
options? Bottle girl, dancer, bartender?
Asked by TG on 07/02/2013
A
Coke whore?
Q
I've just applied to work at a gentlemen's club (doing anything but dancing) and they said they
thought I'd make a good promo girl based on my personality. So my question is what's the best
way to get people coming in to buy a bottle at the door?
Asked by Darling on 05/23/2013
A
Be prepared to get really sick of every guy asking "why aren't you up there?"
Gentlemen's Clubs are not my forte. I don't really get the appeal. Have these guys not heard of
internet porn?
Q
I need special people to join out private parties. dress code and entrance fee.
email me at ericricci.couture@yahoo.com
Asked by Eric on 06/03/2013
A
What do I get?
Q
You mentioned that in the highest tiers, being a promoter gives up to 200k. Do you think, then, I
should dump my prospects of being a commercial pilot and follow the promoter path instead?
Asked by MrPlaneDick on 07/03/2013
A
Keep in mind you are taking career advise from someone whose career choice at one point was
to be a nightclub promoter. So take with a grain of salt.
You need to be model good-looking to make that kind of money. And really, that's not enough.
The guys that make that kind of money are usually a group of friends of famous/rich fathers. They
are really good looking and grew up around party people so they have a huge network of hot girls
and connections to attractive people. Ideally the went to high school in Santa Monica, Pacific
Palisades or Malibu so they might have a friends who are low-level famous (think Brody Jenner).
And they are really good looking so attractive women want to hang out with them.
They're also usually huge douchebags
Does this sound like you? ...More
Q
im a new event planner with several connections in the music world. so event planning can lead
to big $$$$ what questions should I ask the club owner before I decide to host my concert or
music event at his location?
Asked by bwaug on 07/01/2013
A
This is not my field of expertise. Musical acts are booked by their agents typically.
Q
What is the title of the guy that say yes/no on whether you get in to the club (i.e. Parker at
Bootsys)? He doesn't seem to be a promotor or bouncer. Can a hot female have that job, and if
so - how to apply?
Asked by TG on 07/02/2013
A
That's a bouncer. Or doorman as they would call it there.
Yes, a girl can definitely have that job. Bar210, Hemingway's, and Bar Marmont are a few places
that have/had girls at the door. Be prepared to be called the c-word.
Q
If I were looking for drugs in Vegas, would a club promoter be able to hook me up? And how
would you go about asking them something like that?
Asked by Janne on 08/27/2013
A
First of all, I don't condone doing drugs. Unless they make you feel amazing. Or help you have
fun. Or relieve stress. Or get an attractive person to sleep you.
But if you are going to do them or get them, Vegas is among the easiest to do so. Find a sleazy
looking guy at a table and ask straight up.
Q
I have a couple chips from a really good club and they say COMP on the back. A friend of mine
who always gets bottles gave them to me when he was pretty hammered.. I never asked what it
was. Are they bottle comps?
Asked by Lexi on 08/27/2013
A
Seems like he would be a better person to ask.
It's likely a comp admission
Q
I'd like to help new jack promoters in NYC. Would you run this?...
A MUST READ TIP LIST FOR ASPIRING OR RISING PROMOTERS (trust me):
-Bring girls. Tall ones. All girl parties over twenty should be paying $400-$500 if a crew is
aesthetically right
Asked by Frankie Leone on 07/07/2013
A
What in Sam Hill is this question asking?
Q
I will be visiting Vegas for a week with some of my girlfriends is it safe to ask a promoter for
drugs? Do they all know somebody?
Asked by Katherine on 08/28/2013
A
See previous Vegas question
Q
How do you increase your clientele as a promoter?
Asked by the newbie on 07/03/2013
A
By hook or by crook.
I suggest social media as the most efficent means. But promoters are always promoting. Friends
of friends, strangers at the mall. Women are everywhere.
Q
What does one need to become a promoter, just starting off, is there a lot of captial needed?, can
You give me pointers. Because I'd like to start doing club promoting here in south africa?
Asked by lillo on 08/20/2013
A
The only capital required is human capital and by human capital I mean sluts.
Q
Was the average salary of a club promotor?
Asked by Jay on 07/23/2013
A
See previous answer to the question "How much can a club promoter make in a year?"
Q
how old you have to be to be a nightclub promoter?
Asked by michael alig follower on 07/31/2013
A
18 or 21 depending on where you live
Q
Do clubs ever use / give promoters lower quality alcohol than the outside of the bottle suggests? I
don't know how they can make a profit with all these promoters popping ace of spades and
cristal.
Asked by London on 07/26/2013
A
They do. But it's because they are crooks not because they can't turn a profit.
If you see a promoter with Ace of Spades or Cristal it means a) a rich client bought it and the
promoter is just stealing his thunder or 2) he sold many, many more bottles and the club made
tens of thousands of dollars so they can afford to kick him a bottle that cost them $300.
No one is going to pay you more than you are worth to them
Q
How do clubs manage their bottle service reservations? Do they care what clientele book bottles
or do they just care about how much they want to pay?
Asked by asuglfer on 07/10/2013
A
Yes they do care and the better the club the more they care.
They manage the process through the promoters. The promoters will be liable for bad bottle
clients just as they would be for fat girls. Since a good promoter knows he will catch flack for
selling bottles to a bunch of overly-agressive poorly dressed fat guys, he will make it a point to
meet the client or at least check out his facebook before actually selling a table to him.
Here's where it really gets devious. If you try to book directly with the club (some clubs allow this
on their websites or over the phone) they will ask for a credit credit to hold the reservation. What
they are actually doing is looking at your name. So a Brett Weinstein is going to have an easier
time getting a table, will have fewer bottles ...More
Q
Hi! Do you have any advice for females dating a promoter?
Asked by A. on 07/21/2013
A
Ha! Don't kid yourself. You're not dating, you're fucking
"If you date a nightclub promoter, you should lose your right to vote in the next election" - Neal
Brennan
Q
do you have to be 18 or older to be a promoter
Asked by Kevin on 08/01/2013
A
Yes
Q
How much is a good percentage to make at bar if I am booking an event there?
Asked by Kevin on 09/09/2013
A
If it's a one-off event, you probably won't get a percentage of the bar. If you do, you won't have
any negotiating power so take what you can get. As a promoter you are paid in easy lays.
Q
Your opinion- how do you set the dj(non-commercial/top-40/pop hop) lineups for the night? What
genre goes first, primetime, last? House, electro, dubstep, etc...
Asked by ilnguy808 on 08/08/2013
A
Not up to the promoter. The DJ and general manager handle that. In general clubs offer different
music on different nights to segment the crowds
Q
I am an 20 yr old female & Ive just recently started promoting nightclubs& im very good at it but a
competitor has offered to pay me ,and ask what i charge ..whats a reasonable proce
Asked by Lady on 08/08/2013
A
Depends how much you are making now. Whatever he says you can make sure the real number
will be less
Q
Is being a promoter a good living? like raising a family and then retiring as a promotor..? I want to
become a promotor in the Miami area Thanks
Asked by Gary on 07/23/2013
A
You can make a decent living as a promoter but you absolutely can't raise a family. Bottle service
and bottle feeding don't mix. While the money at the higher levels are adaquate, the lifestyle isn't.
Good luck explaining to the mother of your newborn (who still carries the baby weight around)
that you can't change diapers, you've gotta hit the club to pour Grey Goose down skank's throats
until 4am.
And retirement? You'd drop dead first.
Q
What is the average pay per event for a promoter? If I was looking to hire one what would be a
good "price" or pay structure?
Asked by Umm... on 08/05/2013
A
Depends on whether you charge cover or not. If so, a cut of that is appropriate (usually $5 of
$20). If not, you can get more creative in the ways of screwing him over.
Q
Is it unusual for a guy going solo in Vegas to purchase bottle service in a higher-end club?
Asked by atkins on 08/29/2013
A
I'd say it looks shady
Q
How did you build connections in the nightlife when you first started out?
Asked by Tony on 07/31/2013
A
See previous answers to the same question. Short answer....by hook or by crook. I recommend
social media now a'days.
Q
I'm gonna do a vacation year in Australia- Sydney.
I'd like to work for a nightclub to earn some Money while i live there.
Can i work as a promoter with 18 years and no experience? Is there a job to animate people? I'd
love to do that.
Asked by Julian on 09/02/2013
A
The places I went to in Sydney didn't use promoters. Not sure if that's standard there. Start
talking to people and you'll figure it out.
Animate people? That's what the drugs and alcohol are for.
Q
How old is too old for a girl to get in the club?
Asked by Gwendolyn on 09/03/2013
A
Depends how good the club is. As a rule of thumb, if your kid is in high school, please stay home.
Q
Hello , Im 18 and would like to be a club promoter any ideas in how to begin ? What to do ?
Asked by MelissaRusse on 09/19/2013
A
See previous answers to this question. Short answer - start meeting as many girls as possible.
Q
What should I pay my bottle service host? Percentage of sales or percentage of tips? Out of
office hours (answering emails, etc).

Asked by Jimmy on 09/30/2013
A
Bottle girls usually get 20% of the bottle plus tips.
Q
I am thinking of going to a club with my friends visiting and one of them is plus sized but super
pretty and alaways dresses to impress. Will she have a hard time getting into clubs?
Asked by Kaithlyn on 10/22/2013
A
Only if the club is good.
Q
What would you say, would be a descent bar split as in a percentage?
Asked by James Ho on 10/09/2013
A
Depends greatly. I've seen as high as 20%
Q
I am a model (23) and I want to become a vip bottle girl, can you help me get in? I have a 36DD
bust and am skinny, tanned and 5'7". I worked as bartender and made a lot but would like to
make more
Asked by scarlett on 11/18/2013
A
Please send your pic and phone number, better yet just stop by....
Ok I'm kidding. Apply to places in person. If you are a good as you sound, they'll hire you.
Q
what should i set the bar minimum at?
Asked by mike j on 10/01/2013
A
Depends on your area/city. You don't have a lot of negotiating power as a promoter at least at the
beginning.
Q
Hello, do you need any connections to DJ in a club?
Asked by DJ on 01/18/2014
A
It helps. The best DJ's have agents. Otherwise it's a bunch of networking and trying to get your
music heard
Q
can a girl be a club promoter?
Asked by Yamileth on 12/16/2013
A
See previous answer to question starting with "Why aren't there more female club promoters?"
Q
Hey I do bathroom valet at a strip club, what's the best way to become a promoter for the club?
Asked by DD on 01/15/2014
A
Strip Clubs don't have promoters, not like regular nightclubs. Remember nightclubs are tasked
with brining in girls, not guys.
Q
Are there strippers
Asked by will on 12/18/2013
A
In the world? Yes. They get paid to convince men that they find them attractive
Q
Is it easy going into clubs with a fake foreign id saying I'm 21 if I'm a tourist?? and actually 20 yr
old.
Asked by gracie on 03/07/2014
A
If you are an attractive girl, yes. Much like most of life. If not, it will be
harder.
Q
What is the title of the person who handles bottle service? Is it just a waitress that arranges it or a
concierge?
Asked by Addiktive on 03/02/2014
A
Usually she's called the VIP hostess (when she's not being called the c-word)
Q
The PR manager of one of the biggest clubs in LA has banned me because I slept with his
girlfriend. Is he allowed to do that? How much money do club PR managers usually make in
opposed to regular promoters? He claims to be Loaded..
Asked by charleyDRP on 04/10/2014
A
First of all, that's awesome. Kudos to you, I imagine she was hot. Please send pics.
I'm guessing there's no legal statutue that says you are allowed into nightclubs despite banging
the manager's giftfriend. So you're probably going to have to go somewhere else.
Like most people in nightlife, they don't make much. You don't do that job for the money
Q
How do promoters know so many people/get so many phone numbers?
Asked by Hollywood girl on 03/25/2014
A
The short answer is they hustle.
Mostly facebook and other social media now (instagram is big). If you project the right image and
are fun and attractive, clients especially women, show up. The more people you know, the more
will seek you out and your job becomes easier. It's a network effect.
Q
This guy asked me what I charge to host (I have no idea what that even means). What does
hosting at a nightclub entail and what does it usually pay?
A
It means either being the bottle girl or the girl at front with the clipboard. Pay varies but bottle girls
can make a lot on tips (and usually 20% on the bottles)
Q
(Cntd) dont want them, but they spend alot of their time trying to crawl up the model arses.
Desperatly wanting them as 'Girlfriends' but most model dont want them they want a z-list celeb
to date so the promoters are stuck banging uglies. True?
Asked by MeAgain on 04/01/2014
A
Let's not debate what makes a "model" which really could be anything, I've met some beat
models. But yes, the most attractive/quality girls don't want a promoter boyfriend. They'll bang em
once but if a chick is hot she wants to do better than a scumbag promoter.
Q
Actually I have found that the promoters usually want to have a relationship with the models,
whilst f'ing the plain jane club ho's on the side. But they will never upgrade the Basic Club Ho's to
girlfriend status and alot of the time the models

Asked by MeAgain on 04/01/2014
A
Basic Club Ho's would be a good name for a band.
Q
I'm new to event promotio. What would be the best way to make profit at a small local bar that
does not charge at door?
Asked by playtoy on 03/22/2014
A
Small local bars don't usually use outside promoters
Q
can you please expand on the "collecting numbers by any means necessary" or this by hook or
by crook
A
Think I've answered this in the previous question
Q
Have you ever noticed that alot of the models actually seem to hate the promoters? Just 'Play up'
to liking them so they get into the VIP and free drinks etc, but talk about them behind their back
saying their 'Creepy' or 'Players' etc??
Asked by JustMe on 03/25/2014
A
Bahahaha. You know who models end up sleeping with? Creepy guys and players.
And yeah they might play up liking them for free drinks but it's a symbiotic relationship. The
promoter needs them at least as much as they need the promoter.
And in reality they hate them because they've slept with them only to realize the promoters are
sleeping with tons of other girls too.
Q
I was wondering, if you keep asking the promoter for guest list, how do you show that you're
grateful? Do you tip? And also, do you prefer being informed of the party coming in two weeks
advance or a few days before?
Asked by psychoanalyst on 04/07/2014
A
Bringing hot girls is the ultimate thank you. Or buying bottles from him. It's rare to tip but it's nice
when it happens. It's like anything in life, money talks.
If you are getting a table, then advanced notice is great. If not, the promoter doesn't care, just
show up and hope the door guy let's you in.
Q
I was just offered to be a club promoter, seemed like great work whilst completing my Psychology
Degree. Then I came across your blog, Satan must have engulfed 3 tons of ego and conceit and
produced you, come down to earth, earn some pride.
Asked by Conflicted on 04/06/2014
A
Mom?
Q
Are nightclub promoters and bouncers a OFFICALY allowed to ask you for $$ ($100 per) to let
you pass the line but not including entrance fee?
and if so do the promoters and bouncers pocket the cash or split the money among themselves?
Asked by Max on 04/25/2014
A
Not technically. Bouncers get in more trouble than promoters. And for the most part the both just
pocket the $.
Q
I'm starting an event company. How do I Promoter my events and the vip bottle service that goes
with It.
Asked by sweetbelmont on 04/17/2014
A
Promoting = hiring a promoter. It's right there in the name.
Q
Do you know The Electric Pickle club in Miami?..is it easy or difficult trying to get in(I am a 20
year-old girl)
Asked by gracie on 04/16/2014
A
I'm unfamilar that but was my nickname in high school
Q
Obviously my name means I have something going for me. What if I have something
uncontrollable going against me... say male pattern baldness? Could I still get lots of chicks at the
club?
Asked by Dr. Surgeon Man on 05/13/2014
A
I wouldn't say it's your best bet. You should be focusing on places where the women are over 25
(when they are less looks focused) and where they might actually hear you when you say you're
a surgeon. I suggest bars and restaurants.
Also I'd consider shaving your head. The half moon bay look isn't good.
=============================================================
Monday, March 8, 2010

Say Goodbye to Hollywood
As much fun as its been writing this blog unfortunately life has intervened and Im going to have
to step away from it. Ive become too busy with other pursuits and will have to stop writing and
scale back the promoting to mainly special events. Im actually quite happy about it but its
bittersweet. Thanks for all the emails and messages, I definitely appreciate it.
I started this blog because I wanted to pull back the curtain of Hollywood nightlife and show you
that the emperor has no clothes. I wanted to show you that if you think Hollywood nightlife is
superficial, racist, and corrupt on that side of the velvet rope, on our side its 10 times worse.
Ive been going out in this town for damn near a decade. I saw Jay-Z sing bubblin in Dublins in
the actual Dublinswhere he was apparently bubblin. I danced with tweaker girls at 4am at
Coconut Teaser. I got thrown out of a Playboy party at the Century Club. I rolled into Concorde
with some USC sorority girls.
I remember going to the opening night of Opera. It was absolute mayhem as I walked up. As I
waited for my friends to park I saw a guy I had been introduced to a week earlier. He was one of
the managers of one of the other then hot clubs in town. The other manager introduced me to him
and told me after he walked away that the guy was a hardcore coke addict. And 40. And sleeping
on friends couch. I saw him walk up to the door past everyone outside Opera, give the bouncer
the half handshake / half bro-hug and stroll in.
Just then I heard the one of the girls standing next to me say Who is that guy? He must be
important
And that, my friends, is what I want you take away from this blog.
Hollywood nightlife is all smoke and mirrors. That dude isnt really a producer. The club with the
line outside is empty inside. The girl who tells you shes only been with 3 guys that first time that
she didnt like, her high school boyfriend, and you was also seen blowing the bouncer last
week. The VIP in bottle service lives with his parents. The 9 is really a 6 with 2 hours of prep
time. And most importantly, the so-called important person is a 40 year old cokehead.
See these places for what they are.places where pretty people go to fuck each other. Thats it.
Making it into a hot club doesnt make you someone. It doesnt make you cool or in the know
or a tastemaker (someone please tell me what that fuck that word is supposed to mean). If you
derive your self esteem from being able to get into Club X on a Tues. night, you are a douche
who has the mentality of a high school girl. And if you are over 30 and think this way, please get
into a paper cut fight with Magic Johnson.
Parties are intended to be celebrations, and celebrations should be only for those who have
something to celebrate Dagny Taggart in Atlas Shrugged
Growing up my hero was Michael Jordan. Late in his career he wrote about the problems with the
NBA, mainly that the accolades (the $80M contracts, etc) came before the achievement. Status
symbols are meant to be just that - symbols. A flashy car should represent the underlying
achievement, not replace it.
These places, especially during the week, are often filled with the utterly useless of our city. They
should not be admired. They should be ridiculed.
Its a problem that infects our broader culture. What Bill Maher once called it, the Guitar Hero
culture. Everyone wants to be a rockstar, no one wants to learn the chords. And Hollywood is
ground zero for it.
Dont get me wrong. I love nightlife. It can be a lot of fun and it has its place. As much as I poke
fun I think its great to go out with your friends and have a great time, have a few drinks, and meet
some attractive strangers. Id go so far as to even defend it as a good place to meet people. Let
me tell you, its a hell of a lot easier to go to a place filled with attractive girls and find the few
interesting, smart, or substantial women there than to go to a place where supposedly more
substantial or intelligent women go (lets say, a professional mixer) and try to find the 1 attractive
girl (let me clue you in.there arent any). I even have a friend who tried going to church to try to
meet a normal girl and he was fucking atheist!
Ive met some great people in nightlife. Im happy to call many of them my friends. So even
though Im stepping away from the blog and promoting, youll still see me out sipping on my
Crown and Coke, chatting up some model / actress (aka mattress) and making fun of her every
time she says supposably. And Ill still be having a good time doing it.
But remember, if you start bragging to me about getting into some club Im going to remind you
that its no different than that unibrowed Persian guy telling you about his BMW (that his dad
bought for him).
Talk about the achievement, not the status symbol. Tell me when you actually do something.
Otherwise please get the fuck out of our bottle service. :)
Love,
Xander
Posted by Xander After Dark at 6:40 PM 5 comments
Monday, March 1, 2010
Who's that?
At the gym last night and cycling through the tired selection on my iPhone. I got so desperate I
actually allowed a Creed song to infect my eardrums for a few seconds before hastily removing
the plug from the topside of my phone and linking up to the audio on the TV screens in front of
me.
Besides discovering that it is impossible to look manly on the elliptical machine, I stumbled on a
show called Basketball Wives and watched the whole thing as I burn off the afternoons Pinkberry.
Aside from inexplicably ignoring the 800-lb gorilla in the room that the major requirement of
being a basketball wife is looking the other way as your husband takes it to the hole on every
cocktail waitress, bottle service girl, and club skank in 30 cities this particular piece of
journalistic drivel exposed a peculiar quality of hot chicks that I encounter regularly.
They interviewed several wives and each one said the same thing when recalling meeting their
huge future husband to be.
My friends said Oh, Jason Kidd wants to meet you and I was all like, who is that? All the other
girls were totally all over him but I didnt even know who he was.
Riiiiight.
Every one of the wives gave the same story. She didnt know who this guy was, she kept ignoring
him, he pursued her for 15 years before she finally relented and went out with him and it was
another 15 years before they actually had sex. Because if there is one thing pro athletes are
known for, its putting in a lot of work to get laid.
I hear this same line of B.S. all the time. Ill be chatting up some 22-year old Santa Monica
College psychology major and Ill point out some B or C level celebrity at another table.
Me: Hey theres Turtle from Entourage

Her: Whos that? From what now? Oh I dont really watch much TV.
So let me get this straight. I, heterosexual male busy with a day and a night job, whose interests
include sports and finance, somehow recognize a celebrity (albeit not a very big one) but you
empty-headed retard whose entire existence is spent reading US Weekly and TMZ and watching
the E! Channel on a continuous loop, somehow is oblivious to the famous person in the room.
Really?
I dont really watch much TV

Im sure your days are spent pouring over the latest iteration of the Senates health care reform
bill and furiously nitpicking at the details or thumbing through your latest copy of The Economist
considering the implications of microfinance in Indonesia and youve just pulled yourself away
from this important work to come to Voyeur on a Wed. night but I somehow dont buy that even
with all on your plate you dont notice the millionaire in the room.
I dont really care about celebritiesI dont even notice them
So a couple of weeks ago when I saw LA Laker Luke Walton at a certain hotel lounge on
Hollywood and Orange and every girl in the room started hovering around him like the proverbial
golddigging moths to the 6-year, $30M dollar guaranteed contract flame, it was just a mere
coincidence that they were all standing around in that huddle making eyes at him. I mean your
friends probably told you who he was but you dont didnt care because theyre just people like
everyone else. People who are now making out with you.
He totally hit on me once at party and slipped me his number but I never calledI was like
whatever
If she somehow slips up and actually admits to recognizing a celebrity, she will undoubtedly tell
me about how she is unfazed by them and that its not big deal that they buy her a drink / call
her / give her their number / bang her in the back of their Phantom. Im sure shes regularly
passing up opportunities to instant riches by becoming Ray Js baby momma or at least end up
on a reality show. After all she has Stitch, the unemployed actor / part-time tattoo artist waiting at
home for her. Shes too good for Ray J.
In the words of Seth Myers..Really?

Friday, February 19, 2010
Fail
Shopping for a new belt at the Beverly Center on a leisurely Saturday afternoon and I see an
attractive blonde girl about to walk into Forever 21. She's not really my type but she has what we
call "door value" meaning the club will be happy I invited her (i.e. she has more value when she
gets to the club front "door"....presumably because she has a poof in her hair).
Anyway there's no rest for the promoting weary so I decide I need to approach her. Approaching
girls during the day is good because they aren't always connected to 100 other promoters like
most girls you see out on a Tues. night. So I stop her:
Me: Excuse me....hi, I'm Xander, I'm a club promoter. I was wondering if you go out in Hollywood.
Girl: Um, not really.
Me: So what you like, stay in on Sat. night, watch Grey's Anatomy reruns? *smiling*
Girl: Ha. No. I'm 15.
Just then her Mom joined her and looked at me like she was ready to report me to Dateline: To
Catch a Predator.
Fail
Wednesday, February 17, 2010
At the door
As I discussed in a previous post, one of the hazards of promoting is that you don't always know
who someone is friends with. So I might know a really cute girl, but she might be the cute one in
the group.
So started promoting at a new spot on Friday night. The night is going well, all my people are
getting in no problem until I get a text from a cute girl in my phone.
Girl: Hey I'm here. I gave your name at the door but it didn't work.
Me: Who are you with?
Girl: 4 girls
I cringe because I know what this means. I walk out to take a look and I see them standing there.
They aren't linebackers or anything but I see the problem. Never-the-less I pitch my case to door
guy.
Me: "Hey man, these four are mine...what's the issue?" (as if I didn't know)
Door Guy: "2 girls are alright, 2 aren't. One of them looks like a penguin."
Ouch.
The funny thing is, she wasn't fat. He just apparently thought she looked like this:
Monday, February 15, 2010
Thank you
These have got to be the 2 rarest words in all of Los Angeles. I marvel at how infrequently I hear
it. My fellow promoters and I talk about it all the time. Look I know you think youre doing me a
favor coming to the club. Yes, I get paid when you come but our life isnt quite the Lil Wayne
video you probably imagine. Sure I have a good time - after all its why I do this - but let me break
it down for you.
If you are a girl and at our table, we might give you a drink from our bottle. Keep in mind you are
one of many girls weve brought to the club..maybe as many as 50 or 60. Now a bottle of Grey
Goose holds enough booze for about 12 drinks. I know they probably dont teach math at FIDM
but 12 is much less 60 and that doesnt even include all the random bottle rats hovering around
the table. Now Ive mixed and given you a drink. Is it too much to ask for a little not-so-common
courtesy? I know you have an inflated sense of self-importance because you have a skinny
headband on and a poof in your hair and of course your new store bought boobs but that doesnt
mean you forgo the little bit of etiquette you extend your local Starbucks barista. Because even if
your mom didnt teach you any manners, I will.
Just this past Saturday night I heard stories from promoters I have worked with of girls barking
drink orders at them and jingling their empty drinks like the promoter is some hired help or
something. You wanna bark orders at someone? Go yell at the Wendys drive-thru guy. If youre
coming to our table and looking for a drink because God-forbid you actually pay for something
then at least have the decency to say hello and introduce yourself and say thank you when I hand
you the mostly roofie-free Vodka / Soda from our bottle.
This goes for guys too. If we get you in when you dont show up with any girls then say thank you.
Maybe even offer to buy me a drink. Yeah I know it looks like Im ballin but I assure you Im not
getting paid that much and only have a few drink tickets and bottle for a lot of thirsty and sober
girls looking to get fucked up. So I end up buying my own drinks most of the time.
I know this isnt exactly global warming or health care or something actually important but its just
endemic of an overall sense of undeserved entitlement that most people (especially women) in
this town have and it irritates the shit out of me.
I mean if a thank you is good enough for one of Mickey Avalons groupies, its good enough for
you.
Monday, February 8, 2010
The one that got away
The French girl from your study abroad. The grade school crush. The girl from the bar that one
night. Everyone has one.....even a jaded club promoter.
Heidi and I went to high school together. We barely knew each other but our brief interactions
were among the only things I remember or choose to remember from my formative years. We
sat next to each other in Advanced Placement Biology. She was studious and nerdy but
underneath the square glasses and overalls lay the burgeoning femininity of a half-Swedish, halfVietnamese young girl, not yet full aware of her ability to weaken mens knees. She was like the
girl in the Freddy Prinze Jr. movie, beautiful but slightly awkward and focused more on class than
the varsity football game, ready for a makeover to truly unlock her potential.
We sat up front. Her for the proximity to the overhead projector. Me for the opportunity to steal
glances of her thighs as her rose-patterned black shimmering skirt hiked up her leg when she sat
down. My focus on fossil records and DNA replication was constantly being diverted each time
Heidi raised her hand to ask a question, or ran her fingers through her hair, sending her straight
sandy blond hair back to the small of her back.
I make her laugh by signing into the lab sheet as Mike Hunt. She shows me pictures of her that
her mom says makes her look too chink-y. Each time I get up and walk toward the Bunson
burner during lab, I sneak a glimpse of her frilly, pastel colored underwear as she crosses and
uncrosses her legs, sending an unfamiliar tingling sensation through my boy parts.
As graduation approaches, Im informed through a mutual friend that Heidi doesnt have a date
for the prom. My desire to ask her is overwhelmed by my painful shyness. This future Hollywood
club promoter is paralyzed by a deathly fear of rejection. Prom passes and graduation arrives. As
we are signing each others yearbooks I am surprised to find that Heidi has left me her phone
number. On the last day of school we run into each other in an empty hall:
You have my number right?
I do.
You should call or something
I will my voice cracks
I stared at her phone number in my yearbook for more than a month. Endless permutations of
potential future interactions ran through my mind. By the end of the month I had married and
divorced her dozens of times in my minds eye and with each machination of imagined captured
and lost young lust, I became more fearful and convinced of the futility of picking up the phone.
I never called.
Over the years, Heidi became a metaphor. A reason to approach the random girl at the coffee
shop. To head out on a rainy night when Id rather stay in. The ups and downs especially the
downs - of finding lust and love in Hollywood were occasionally tempered by the memory of a 17year old closing a yearbook and the feeling of defeat as he stored it away in the back of his closet
for the last time.
For most people, this story epilogues with a chance encounter at the grocery store years later, or
a name-tag wearing high school reunion where the object of their past crush has morphed into a
stroller pushing suburban resident, heavy-set and married, the remnants of youthful desire only
faintly conspicuous behind a nostalgic twinkle in each others eyes. The sting of lost potential is
assuaged by the knowledge that not all that glitters is gold and the passing years reassure that
your idealized crush was just that.
But this isnt a storybook Hollywood ending. This is a True Hollywood Story.
Last Saturday I am on a bar stool, watching UFC 109. Between fights I glance up and see a
familiar face smiling on the glowing screen. The glasses that slid down her face as she looked up
at the chalkboard are gone. The sandy blonde hair is dyed platinum but the dimply smile is
unmistakable. She waves at the cameraa wave once directed at me more than a decade earlier
when a lesser known member of the cheerleading squad stretched and said hello to a lesser
known member of the basketball team as he warmed up for a game.
I entertain a brief fantasy of reconnection. Walking outside a club to greet a long lost crush.
Walking through the crowd with fingers interlocked as gawking observers see the more polished
versions of two people from humble beginnings.
My eyes return to the plasma screen and to her right side where I see her companion seated next
to her at ringside. My brief fantasy is quickly dashed away and my day-dream comes to an abrupt
awakening.
Heidi is Chuck Liddells new girlfriend.
FML
Posted by Xander After Dark at 11:17 AM 5 comments
Sunday, January 31, 2010
Help me help you
This is a phrase my friends and I use. What we mean by that is when you come to the club, I
want to help you get in. In fact, thats my job. I want the door guy to marvel at my ability to bring
gorgeous girls to his venue. I want to walk out and have him say, Nice work Xander, I have been
standing here with a rod in my pants for the last 2 hours just staring at the prime trim youve
brought out tonight. You are the Pied Piper of Poontang.
And I want you to have a good time too. If I invited you out, chances are Id like to hang out with
you. If all goes well you have a good time, I get paid, we have some drinks, maybe hang out at
our table, and everyone goes home happy (and hopefully with someone attractive).
But I cant do it alone. Youve got to work with me here.
That means if you say you are coming you dont forget to mention that you are bringing 5 dudes
with you.
That means you leave your 300 lb coworker with the overbite at home watching CSI reruns.
That means you dont dress like you are going to 80s night in Ecco Park.
Let me give you an analogy. Lets say I want to hang out with you. So I call you up and you say
great lets hang out. And you add Hey Im going to my weekly Anti-immigration group meeting.
Tonights topic is keeping Mexican midgets out of the country because they are taking all our
good pro wrestling jobs." (Apparently you're an Orange County Republican). But regardless I
agree to meet up with you.
On my way to meet you, I stop by and pick up my friend Chuy.
As you can see, Chuy is Mexican. And a midget. But I like to keep Chuy around because he
makes me feel better about myself. I mean, sure I might have the occasional premature
ejaculation, but at least Im not 4 ft tall right?
So Chuy and I show up just as you are discussing Luche Lubre. Now tell me, should I be
surprised if you dont seem happy to see us?
But Chuy is soooo fun I say. He had me cracking up the whole way over with tales of his midget
life. Why do you have to be a dick about it? I just wanted to come hang out at your Antiimmigration rally and maybe enjoy some of the refreshments.
You see this is exactly what you are doing when you show up to club like this:
Its actually worse because in my case you can actually get me fired. And promoting isnt like
working at Toyota where if you screw up, you sit down with HR and they write you up and discuss
disciplinary actions for your excessive porn use at the office. Nope in my case I get fired on the
spot. At worst I get fired. At best Im going to be enduring weeks of Hey can you keep your guest
list under 2 tons tonight? jokes.
So save the angry text messages. Save the questioning of my abilities as a promoter.
Side note: In general, questioning the credibility of a promoter is like questioning the table
manners of a chimpanzee. Of course if you are reading a blog about the crooks, drug addicts,
and bathroom blowjobers of the nightlife industry, youd understandably expect the highest
degree of journalistic integrity. Just had to get that out of the way for any blog tourists. :)
So in summary, help me help you get into the club. We all know that these places are in the
business of bringing the most attractive women in and selling the chance to try to sleep with them
to a few dudes in bottle service in a kind of high stakes mating ritual. Dont be surprised when
they dont let you in if you arent bringing the goods and definitely dont expect me to help you
reverse this rather obvious and explicit requirement like Im MLK marching on Washington for the
overweight and unsexy. I dont make the rules here, I just live by them.
So please.leave Chuy at home.
Wednesday, January 27, 2010
Occupational Hazard
I'm dancing with a Xander special - trashy blonde with an nice body. My buddy comes behind me
and leans in my ear.
Buddy: Don't make out with her.
Me: Why?
Buddy: She just blew a guy in the alley.
Me: That's a good reason.
I walked away without saying goodbye.
Saturday, January 23, 2010
Only in LA......
..... is the checkout girl at the supermarket hotter than the model on the cover of the magazine
displayed next to her.
Forget Voyeur on Thursday, I'm going to start hanging out at Ralph's on Poinsettia.

Thursday, January 21, 2010
Bottle rats or How to get a girl attracted to you
It's a rainy week here in the City of Angels so I've been reminiscing about the great summer I had.
It reminded me of a story a friend and fellow promoter told me about his first time at XIV in the
summer.
XIV Sunday afternoons in the summer were as good as it gets in LA. The heat was on, the house
music blaring, and the 9's and 10's were dancing in the booths overlooking Sunset Blvd. Traffic
slowed to a crawl as gawkers and passers-by stared slack-jarred in disbelief, wondering what the
hell was going on in broad daylight on week's sabbath day.
My buddy and his friends get a table and a few $500 bottles of vodka. Eventually a random girl
comes by and starts fixing herself a drink. My buddy's friend - we'll call him Mark because that's
what the girl thought he was - engages her:
Mark: "Hi"
Bottle Rat: (not making eye contact, continues pouring) "Hi"
Mark: (louder, like he's rudely interrupting) "HI!"
Bottle Rat: (continues pouring, still barely acknowledging his existence) "Hi"
Mark then grabs the full drink out of her hand, puts his hand over the terrace balcony and turns
the cup upside down, pouring heavily marked-up Grey Goose into the bushes outside.
Mark: "Get the fuck out of here"
In the words of Ali G....Respect
Be a Mark and not a mark and don't let bottle rats ruin your night.
Monday, January 18, 2010
"My phone died"
Translation: I did not want to talk to or hang out with you.
Thursday, January 14, 2010
Guidos vs. Persians
Got into another NY vs. LA discussion the other day and it got me thinking about a couple of
things. First, why does NY has so many great classic songs by everyone from Frank Sinatra to
Tha Dogg Pound to the latest Jay-Z and Alicia Keys song yet the best LA can do is "I'm in LA,
bitch" - a crappy remix to a crappy song?
But more importantly I thought about the two blemishes on otherwise fine respective nightlife
scenes. So it's time for a look at......drumroll please......Guidos vs. Persians.
GUIDOS
PERSIANS
Facebook Profile Pic
Shirtless in the mirror
Native Habitat Jersey / Staten Island
BMW
Westwood / Beverly Hills
Ride
Escalade
Magic carpet
(Daddy's SLR on the weekends)
Blasting out of car
Shitty house music
Shitty Indian music
Fashion Statement
Popped collar
Gold chain
Wants to sell you

Mortgage Loan Modification
A luxury car
Free time spent

Tanning, Working out
Bragging, Waxing body hair
Has weakness for

Nose rings / Tramp stamps
Tan
Artificial
Blonde white girls with poof in their hair
Hereditary
Often mistaken for

Puerto Ricans Cousin It
Can usually be seen
Lifting weights Arguing loudly
"The Situation"
Mike Sorrentino's Abs
Biggest Fear
Your drain is now clogged with hair
Herpes Airport security
Tattoo Italian Flag
Mercedes symbol
People (incorrectly) assume your family is

In the Mafia
In Al Qaeda
Famous Ladies man
Giacomo Casanova
(see link in comment section)
Biggest disappointment
Sopranos Finale
Daaavid from Brenvooood
Cousin just bought more expensive car than you
Preferred hairdo
BlowoutBack hair
Last Name Ends In
Vowel Having to spit
Signature move
Fist pump
Cussing out bouncer, yelling "I can buy and sell 10 of you" then
apologizing profusely and eventually buying bottle service
Shwayze - Let It Beat
If you are looking for a great soundtrack to the LA lifestyle, I highly recommend this album (no, I'm
not getting paid to endorse it). I saw these guys open for label-mate Mickey Avalon and again at
the Sunset Strip Music Festival. While their debut album was all about the beach and the
sunshine, this one goes a little more risque with tales of club bathroom sex and casting couches.
Shwayze's familair lyrical topics - women and weed - are again laid over Cisco Adler's catchy
production and the result has been playing in my car as I roll down Sunset in 75 degree Januaryin-LA weather. Check out the single, my favorite song on the album, pasted below...
Tuesday, January 12, 2010
Brutal Honesty
I was reminded of this story by my friend Juni, who attended the opening weekend of a A-level
club on Santa Monica Blvd. with me. The promoter on the night is arguably the biggest promoter
in town. We roll up and are talking to the bouncer as a frantic and growing crowd outside is trying
to get in and pretending to text someone to ameliorate the awkwardness of being on the wrong
side of the velvet rope.
The promoter - who I'll call "Simon" - comes out and people start shouting his name to try to get
themselves in.
A guy shouts at him:
Dude: "Simon, I know you from blah, blah, blah"
Simon: "Sorry bro, tomorrow night I might know you, but tonight I don't. "
A pair of girls (cute, but not hot) start shouting at him:
Girls: "Simon, Simon get us in!!!"
Simon: *looking them up and down* "Sorry girls, only the pretty people inside tonight"
Then he walks back inside.
Wow. I've never been more inspired in entire my life. I think I actually shed a tear of joy.
Tuesday, January 5, 2010
Under New Managerment
So after bagging on Halo (previously Ritual, previously White Lotus), I should pass along the info
that the closed-since-summer club named after the video game of the same name was recently
purchased by SBE Entertainment (XIV, MI6, Area, Hyde). A redo and reopening is scheduled for
the first quarter of 2010.
If previous SBE incarnations are any indication, the new spot will be ultra hot and have a very
short name.
More Plausible Deniability
These are two of my favorites
I dont go to clubs to meet guys

This is ALWAYS followed by this exchange:
Me: The last guy you dated. What was his name?
Girl: Blah, blah, blah
Me: Where did you meet him?
Girl: At a club
Me: *Staring blankly, then walking away*
I dont really go clubbing
The majority of girls say this at some point in the conversation. I get it; you dont want to be
known as a club girl. But seriously these places are packed week after week, with girls who
supposedly dont go clubbing. It reminds me of reading that 74% of people say they have better
than average judgment (this is obviously mathematically impossible). The same principle has
been shown in studies of job performance, driving ability, and physical appearance.
But really you dont go clubbing.
Sunday, January 3, 2010
"I just want to dance"
She don't want a man,
She just wants to dance....
-Asher Roth
I understand that girls need plausible deniability but you must know how ridiculous this sounds. If
you really wanted to just dance you could go to a dance class or a gay club. But instead you
spend 2 hours getting ready, putting on uncomfortable clothes and shoes, getting your flakey
pain-in-the-ass friends together, arguing for an hour where to go, dealing with Saturday night
traffic and parking, dealing with door drama, dealing with other bitchy / hating girls, getting
bumped and shoved all night, paying $14 a drink at a 700% markup, having said drink spilled on
your new $200 dress, getting grabbed aggressively by douchebags, and taking care of your drunk
friend who you actually hate..all for the chance of meeting a guy or at least having a guy grind
his boner on you from behind.
But you just want to dance.

Saturday, January 2, 2010
Life Cycle of a Hollywood Club - Pt 2
Alright in Part 1 I went over the first 3 phases of a clubs life span. Now well go over the Tiers 4-6.
One point of clarification. I wouldnt be caught dead in any of these places. But I know what
theyre like because when I was 21 and started going clubbing and I often ended up here with me
and my entourage of dudes. Anyway, here we go..
Tier 4 Community College
So named because 1) no matter who you are, are, $20 gets you in and 2) there are a lot of
Asians. Usually a club is predominantly Asian in this phase with some Hispanic and Indian (7-11,
not casino) mixed in. Girls get charged cover as well unless theyre very hot. Some clubs that
have had extended Community College phases are Highlands, Area, and Element.
Tier 5 Pack a Vest and A Chrome
Theres one word for this phase: G-H-E-T-T-O. Its like Saddle Ranch came to the club.
Bankrupt just got out of prison and wants to get his groove on. The people come from the Inland
Empire and places that youve heard of in N.W.A. songs. Lots of Tapout and sports jerseys. There
are entire herds of 200 lb+ Mexican girls. The whole place smells like weed. Guys = neck tattoos,
Girls = boob tattoos with their mans name (may he rest in peace) in cursive writing. Ive actually
seen a guy with a FACE tattoo in one of these clubs. Not just Mike Tyson around the eye tribal
symbol stuff. Im talking both cheeks fully tatted and the word FUCK on one side and YOU on the
other.
Fights will often break out in these clubs. Let me rephrase that. Shoving matches will break out.
Guys in LA are way too pussy to actually ever throw a bunch. It might screw up their faux-hawk.
Tier 6 Clusterfuck
My friend Kelly correctly identified and named this phase when we unintentionally ended up at
Ritual a few weeks before it closed. In the clusterfuck phase you have:
A mostly empty club. Only about 15% -20% as many people as when the club was hot
Random ass people in the club. A midget in a wheelchair. A creepy 70-year old guy in a
hospital gown (hey he had $20). A woman brought her kids and theyre drinking.
A random 10 you have no idea what shes doing there. Is she a hooker? Is she dating a
bartender? Out of towner? Have a penis? All of the above?
Tier 6 clubgoer
After this phase the club mercifully shuts down for 6-12 months, remodels and changes its name
to something cooler and more vague and starts the lifecycle over again. A few observations about
the whole process
Clubs surprisingly make the most money in the later phases. Everyone is paying cover and
they pack the place in like sardines. AND they still buy drinks. This is more lucrative than a bunch
of 9s and 10s who dont spend any money and just a few baller dudes in bottle service.
Clubs will try to only shut down for a short time and reopen but this doesnt work. You cant fool
me Empire, youre still Sugar. The worst was Ritual not even closing but actually sectioning off
half and calling it Halo. You cant fool me; I can still smell the weed coming from Ritual next door!
Youre sill Ritual and youre still a Tier 5!
Some spots are blessed and some are just cursed. The place that is now XIV was Privilege
before that and Shelter before that and all 3 have enjoyed elite crowds and long runs. Contrast
that with a not-to-be-named place near Hollywood and Highland that over 3 turnovers has never
been higher than Tier 3.
Monday, December 28, 2009
"We need more sluts"
Only in this business can you go to your Monday morning business meeting and hear this phrase.
I guess if you worked at a brothel.

The general manager of the club said this when referring to the fact that he noticed the bottle
service clients weren't getting laid. So if you or someone you know is whoring it up around town,
please get in touch with me. Apparently my clientele skews too classy.
Saturday, December 26, 2009
Xmas in Hollywood
The promoting team and I did a one-off promoting gig at Playhouse on Christmas Day. You would
have thought people would stay in on this of all days but you'd be wrong. Not only was it packed
but notorious nightowl and former UFC champ Chuck Liddell was in the house. So you could say
I had a very Hallmark Christmas - 72 degrees outside and hanging out in bottle service with The
Iceman. Can't help but think it's what Jesus would have wanted.
I love when my east coast friends visit and they say about LA weather "Yeah but I like seasons." I
like seasons too....that's why I live in a place that skips the shitty ones.
Tuesday, December 22, 2009
HDNet Filming
My promoting partners and I just filmed a special for HDNet about the Top Ten Party Cities in
America. It went really well and we can't wait for the airing. Pictures and videos will be uploaded
soon....stay tuned.
Translating Bouncer Speak
Were at capacity
The place is empty but you rolled up with 3 dudes. (My favorite part of this one is a minute after
saying this stretch hummer of 20 girls will roll up and walk right in)
Its a private party tonight
By private I mean it excludes fat chicks.
I dont see you on the list
Youre ugly and Im hoping dumb enough to not realize there isnt actually a list in my hand
That promoter isnt here tonight
Im going to go yell at him for inviting you
Who are you with?

Ditch the guys who drove you here (And they will)
That promoters list is closed
To you
Gimme a sec
Youll be out here all night. Save yourself some time and just go straight to Saddle Ranch.
There's a great movie called Bounce that takes this a step further and looks at the lives of
bouncers in NY and LA.
NYE in LA
If you're planning on being in LA on New Year's Eve, I got all the info and best deals. Go to
http://www.XanderEvents.blogspot.com to check out the events and email me at
XanderAfterDark(at)gmail.com for tickets!
Life Cycle of a Hollywood Club Pt 1
Generally a Hollywood club has a 2-3 year lifespan. There are some that go longer Les Deux
for example has had an almost 4 year run and counting and some go much shorter (Apple
Lounge got Ed Hardy-ed in less than a year). But in general this is how it goes:
A couple notes on this: 1) It might sound like this is about race but its really about social class
and sometimes social class and race go together. 2) These are broad strokeseach tier bleeds
into the other. Ok on to the show.
Tier 1: "Youre not on the list"
When a club from a proven owner opens up, it starts in Tier 1. Its packed with 9s and 10s and
there are hardly any guys except the promoters for most of the night (by the end its about 30%
guys). 7s get shot down at the door and go home to purge. There are a ton of paparazzi outside.
Inside there is a heavy skew toward scantily clad white, blonde girls with big fake boobs and
poofs in their hair.
When a club from a proven owner opens up, it starts in Tier 1. Its packed with 9s and 10s and
there are hardly any guys except the promoters for most of the night (by the end its about 30%
guys). 7s get shot down at the door and go home to purge. There are a ton of paparazzi outside.
Inside there is a heavy skew toward scantily clad white, blonde girls with big fake boobs and
poofs in their hair.
There are some celebrity sightings, most of whom have been paid to be there. It is easier for a
camel to pass through the eye of a needle than to get past the door. The club gets press in Us
Weekly and TMZ. They sell bottle service at exorbitant prices and still they make sure that the
guys dropping $2,000 are good looking. Voyeur is currently a Tier 1 club.
Tier 2:"300"
Once the Persians know where the blonde hotties go they immediately start infiltrating. The door
people form a Spartan like phalyx to hold off the invading Persian army. However the Tier 1 crowd
has been frequenting the same club for months and ennui is setting in. Their burnout means the
crowd gets lighter, loosening the door policy. Eventually they start selling bottle service to
Persians, bankers, and guys who live at home with their parents and lease their car so they can
buy bottles at the club. The girls are still really hot but they are more diverse and the ratio drops
to about 55%-60% girls. Towards the end of this phase the club starts charging cover charge to
guys but not girls. This practice is actually illegal.
Tier 3:
"Bridge and Tunnel"
Everyone in the club is from the valley (Burbank, Sherman Oaks, etc) or similarly far away places.
We dont actually have bridges and tunnels in LA so the equivalent are the hills that separate the
valley from Hollywood and the Westside. Clientele are primarily Hispanic and Asian and the ratio
is about 60% - 65% dudes. Youll also start to see a lot more grinding as the preferred method of
approach.Empire is currently a tier 3 club.
Stay tuned for Part 2 next week where I cover Tiers 4-6
Wednesday, December 16, 2009
You look....Haute
Just getting back from the soft opening of Haute, the new place occupying what was formerly
Apple Lounge. The new dcor is cool and the kitchen is huge. Like Apple, they have separated
the lounge / dining area from the skanks-get-their-groove-on section. Didnt get a look at the
menu but I assume it will be typical skewers and sliders. By the way, just because you shrink a
hamburger down and call it a slider doesnt make it gourmet cuisine. Ive never understood this.
Anyway this promising new spot will hopefully revitalize this interesting space in the heart of
Boystown. More details to follow as the club gets its real opening.
Great Drake Line
"Shorty wanna party so don't let your girl up out the house,
Or there'll be shots on TMZ of me giving her mouth-to-mouth"
Tuesday, December 8, 2009
Bye Bye Bar Delux
Found out the Bar Delux is closing in Feb 2010 and will remodel to become a restaurant / lounge.
There is no truth to the rumor that the club failed because it refused to let me in on opening night
(can't a guy show up with his 2 buddies at midnight anymore?).
I heard the original name for Bar Delux was going to be "We Only Have Tables So Buy One or
You'll Look Like a Huge Douche." I guess that wouldn't fit on the sign out front.
Saturday, December 5, 2009
Irony
I'm hanging out at MI6 and strike up a conversation with a "blonde." Her roots are clearly showing
and she has rather obvious long extensions. She's wearing a pound of make up, green contact
lenses, and fake porn-star looking eyelashes. Her breast implants brush up against me
periodically when one of us gets bumped. She's wearing 6 inch heels and confesses that she's
only 5' tall. We're having a NY vs. LA discussion when she drops this gem.
"I hate how everyone in LA is so fake."
After staring at her blankly for a second, I walked away without saying goodbye.
Thursday, December 3, 2009
Introduction
Xander: Forgive me father for I have sinned

Father: Go on
Xander: Ive treated women poorly father
Father: Have you beat them?
Xander: No. But I have rated them 1-10 in my phone. And invited them to events based on that
rating.
Father: Go on
Xander: Ive fucked.sorry, I mean fornicated. Ive fornicated with these women. In the clubs. In
the bathroom at these clubs.
Father: Go on my son
Xander: Ive insulted these women. I called them fat. I told them to take their ugly friend home
and come back to the club. I may have called them a wildebeast and said that her open toed
shoes looked like she was baking bread. Ive called them a cougar and clawed them all night with
my paw.
Father: You have much to confess
Xander: Theres more. I have discriminated against others based on their race.
Father: Oh my. How have you done this?
Xander: A Middle Eastern gentleman tried to get in my club. I denied him.
Father: I guess thats not so bad.
Xander: And then I tried to explain to Ali Baba that he and his girlfriend could get in but his 40
thieves would need bottle service.
Father: Thats racist
Xander: Theres more father.
Father: Oh no
Xander: I have much to confess. Drinking in excess. Sex. Coveting. Adultery. Bearing false
witness. Wearing Affliction. What should I do?
Father: What do you mean?
Xander: Hail Marys? Our Fathers?
Father: Huh? You know youre in a bathroom stall right?
Xander: I dont go to church, youve all Ive got man!

Father: Um, I guess you could tip the bathroom attendant.
Xander: Then what?
Father: You could confess online. Like a blog or something
Xander: Thats a great idea father!
Father: Oh, and stop calling me father. Its creepy.
Xander: Youve got it. And one more thing.
Father: What?
Xander: Say Xanders list at the door!
======================================
Pick-Up Coach
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Pick-Up Coach
Name: Xander
Location:
Hollywood, CA
Gender:
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Age:
32
I was a practitioner of Pick-Up Arts, as taught through numerous books, classes, and online
forums. Now I help legions of average, frustrated chumps learn how to interact with women and
land the dates and relationships they've always wanted.
Ask me anything!
remaining: 250
Submit Question
Subscribe to this Q&A | Sort by:
Q
What pick-up techniques do you recommend most?
Asked by greenlight on 03/06/2012
A
Well first I put on eyeliner and a fuzzy hat. Then I ask a girl if this is her card. Then I spend the
next 20 minutes talking about how awesome I am and how lame she is. And then I take her
home.
Kidding, kidding. All of those oft-touted "pick-up" strategies are kind of red herrings. The
"techniques" that were featured in "The Game" or VH1's "The Pickup Artist" reality show are lame
and played out like Arnold's "What you talking 'bout Willis?" If you walk up to a girl today and ask
"would you still date a guy who was friends with his ex?" I hope she says "would you still use a
lame opening line from a dated, poorly written book?"
But the lameness of those specific tactics aside, the themes that underlie them, such as
understanding female psychology, dominance, playful teasing, displaying ...More
Thumbsup 217 Votes Ask the Pick-Up Coach a question Share >
Q
If I'm already in the friend zone, should I just chalk it up as a loss, or is there a good way you
recommend to get out of the friend zone?
Asked by mrniceguy (again) on 03/06/2012
A
You'd have an easier time escaping Riker's Island than the dreaded Friend Zone. "But I have this
one friend who knew this chick for 5 years......." Don't want to hear it. Move on, if you were a
sexual option it would have happened by now. Every woman has loads of "guy friends" that think
they are one drunken night out away from making it happen. They aren't.
Q
What's the typical path taken by those who get involved with the pick-up community and
coaching?
Asked by Timmay on 03/06/2012
A
Generally, everyone first reads "The Game", then Mystery's book, then blogs and online forums.
Many people take bootcamps which are generally 3 days of lecture and 2 nights in bars
approaching women. I took 2 bootcamps with the top companies. One was a regular
comprehensive bootcamp, one was a specialized one. I also attended 3-4 special seminars by
instructors who had good reputations. At the beginning it was a little like learning martial arts.
Some people advocated jiu-jitsu, some Krav Maga, and interested students wanted to know what
worked best. Over time all the theories and strategies narrowed down to a more or less to a
single consensus much in the way the various martial arts eventually turned into the Mixed
Martial Arts you see practiced in UFC.
You may also like: Dating Website Employee, Flirting/Relationship Coach, Nightclub Promoter
Q
Are you mostly coaching sci-fi geeks who've never kissed a girl, or regular dudes trying to
sharpen their game?
Asked by hansolo on 03/06/2012
A
Although I'd love to avoid the cop-out answer I can't.... there are all kinds. In my bootcamp there
was a 23-year-old millionaire who had been with 300 women, a guy nearing his 50s, a successful
Asian director, and a bunch of computer programmers. I'd say about 20% of my clients are,
well...virgins. But there are plenty of regular dudes...investment bankers, lawyers, etc who just
need the nudge.
Q
How do I make it sting less when I get rejected?
Asked by Anon on 03/06/2012
A
12 beers. No, I'm kidding.
One word: Volume. The more you do it, the less any one approach means to you. If you work up
the nerve all night to talk to one girl and it doesn't go well you'll feel it a lot more than you would if
she was one of 10 you talked to that night. Over time you'll also develop a thicker skin and a
realization of how much of a woman's decision to say "yes" is influenced by a multitude of factors
you have nothing to do with.
Q
I have zero game in bars. Are there any particular venues that you think are underrated as places
to meet decent women?
Asked by rossp on 03/06/2012
A
If you have "zero game" as you say, it's unlikely to improve just because you set foot in an
establishment that serves coffee instead of alcohol. Women don't change species just because
they are in a club. Work on the game part first...are you anxious? Dull? Overly deferential?
Address whatever it is head on. Once you've managed that, then you can start worrying about the
types of venues that will enable you to meet the most compatible women.
I will say that Bed Bath and Beyond is highly underrated (I'm serious)
Q
What kinds of women respond best to these pick-up techniques?
Asked by MrX on 03/06/2012
A
All of them. That's not to say all women are the same. Women respond to power and status, for
example. But power and status for a 21 year old club girl means something different that it does
to a 28 year old corporate attorney. The knock on the "techniques" is that they only work on
insecure women but while there's a grain of truth in that, being charming or having good game is
something virtually all women recognize and respond to.
Q
How long after you set about trying to improve with women yourself did things really start to click?
Asked by Sal on 03/06/2012
A
I was fortunate in that I was never really terrible with women so pretty quickly after I starting going
out regularly I was seeing that girls responded to me. But a little like a game of wack-a-mole
when you learn one thing you find others popping up. For example I'm still trying to get
comfortable with a girl telling me she likes me without freaking out.
Q
If I'm at a bar talking to some chick and she mentions she has a boyfriend but continues to flirt
with me, is it safe to assume there's still a chance to hook up?
Asked by fuggedaboutit on 03/09/2012
A
Ha... this kind of makes me chuckle because it highlights a little bit of gender projection. When we
guys talk to a girl (especially in a bar) it's because we want to hook up with her. Black and white;
plain and simple. Doesn't work that way for girls. She gets most of what she wants (ego boost,
feeling desired) from the flirtation itself. In psychology this is the concept of narcisstic supply. Or
put another way as a study on female sexuality concluded, "For women, feeling desired is the
orgasm."
So while yes it is possbile you can still hook up and that she's just mentioning it so she feels like
it's your fault when it happens ("I told him I have a boyfriend!"), it's much more likely that she's
enjoying the flirtation and attention with no intention of actually acting on it. You're much ...More
Q
What's the most common mistake you see your clients making with women and how do you
correct it?
Asked by 112211 on 03/06/2012
A
Bragging. Or worse, humblebragging. It's utterly transparent. I'm sure you are proud of the Law &
Order-worthy case you've laid out of why she should like you but that's not really how it works. As
far as correcting it, pretty simple. Knock it off.
But really "mistakes" or any thing revolving around technique takes a big backseat to just
overcoming various fears and insecurities which, unfortunately, take more time and effort to
"correct."
Q
Is your position as dating coach a full time or part time source of income?
Asked by EmilyStylist on 03/06/2012
A
I did it part-time but there is an entire industry of guys that do it full time. Ebooks, DVD's and such
can add significant income and serves as marketing for the more expensive personalized
coaching.
Q
Have you ever met or worked with Neil Strauss, Mystery, or any of the other well-known guys
from The Game?
Asked by Marcus on 03/06/2012
A
I know Neil and have met and been out with Mystery on many occasions. I've met virtually all of
the characters in The Game. Haven't worked with any of them although I did work for the biggest
PUA company on an independent project for a time in exchange for some coaching.
Q
If I'm gonna booty-call via text, what's the best possible opener? "Where u at?" ain't cutting it
anymore.
Asked by psufoo! on 03/12/2012
A
You're way overthinking it. Girls aren't stupid; if you are texting at 2am it doesn't matter if it's
"Where u at?," "Hey" or "The Yankees win the pennant!" she knows why you're texting.
Q
Have you ever worked with a guy you thought was utterly hopeless, and did you have much
success?
Asked by Marty on 03/06/2012
A
I've never had anyone I thought was hopeless but I know coaches who have. There is definitely a
point where I can go no further as coach and a therapist has to pick up the baton. Like the
proverbial onion, peoples' layers often take time to peel away and often reveal things that they
didn't know were there. And like most things, you can lead a horse to water......
Q
Cologne - yes or no?
Asked by Lucky4 on 03/07/2012
A
I'm of an ethnicity known for wearing too much so I abstain completely but I think most guys can
get away with a dash. It's hard not to envison cheesy meatheads putting on Acqua Di Gio before
grinding at Pure in Vegas but some women have told me they like it so feel free to knock yourself
out.
Q
Are your clients just trying to bed tons of women, or is it less superficial than that?
Asked by JackFlash on 03/06/2012
A
There are a small minority of chronic womanizers who are just trying to run up their numbers, but
I'd say 95% of the guys that I coach want to have a little fun for a few years and settle down with
a cool girlfriend. They just want to feel like they have some say in the matter.
Q
Dating in the workplace -- love it or hate it? I know it's an HR no-no, but it seems totally natural
given how much time we spend with co-workers.
Asked by THEMichaelScott on 03/06/2012
A
You know how they get pandas to mate? They just stick 'em in the same cage. We may eat Slim
Jims instead of bamboo and reside in cubicles instead of cages but we Homo Sapiens aren't
much different despite annual sexual harassment training. As long as you aren't breathing heavy
on your assistant I say knock yourself out. Plus the forbidden aspect and the secret keeping are
likely to amp up the sexual tension so enjoy. Just don't spill coffee on my TPS reports.
Q
How did you discover the pick-up community?
Asked by mumbai on 03/06/2012
A
After years of middling success with dating, I read the book "The Game" in 2006. Here I found
that there was an actual strategy being employed by geeky men all across the globe and they
were reporting back to their fellow geeks via the interwebs. I spent the next few years reading
these geek's strategies, experiences, and advice, some of which was brilliant, some of which was
terrible. I also met virtually every character in the book, dozens more instructors, hundreds of
practicing pupils, and of course many, many pretty ladies (and a few ugly ones).
Q
I'm a little overweight - nothing crazy, but definitely doughy. Average height. What's best way to
dress & present myself to compensate for it?
Asked by The Hammer! on 03/14/2012
A
Get in the gym and lose the weight. Extra weight is really hard to conceal. Wearing black or a
vest can help a bit but it still shows in your face. Pick up some weights, hit the track and most
importantly, eat clean and you can wear all the tight t-shirts you want.
Q
What was your first "aha" moment after you started learning the ropes?
Asked by MrX on 03/06/2012
A
I think it was the first time I hung out with Mystery, one of the most prominent dating coaches. He
was wearing some ridiculous multi-colored coat and a belt buckle that was playing his Vh1 show
on an LCD screen. I was talking to a girl and she said "Look at him, he looks ridiculous. Like he
needs attention." 20 minutes later she was all over him. The "aha" was that what people
(especially women) say and what they do are frequently not the same thing.
Q
Why is Bed Bath & Beyond and good place to meet women? What's a good opening line in that
kind of place?
Asked by subzer0 on 03/06/2012
A
There are always attractive women there and perhaps there's something to the "nesting" aspect
of the place.
Lines are overrated. There's nothing wrong with "Hey I know this is a pretty random place to do
this but I want to meet you. I'm Xander."
If you want to get cute you could also ask "Hey do you know where they sell blankets in here?"
Q
How many dates should there be before sex? (I'm 22, btw).
Asked by cantsaysorry! on 02/09/2013
A
Unclear if you are a guy or girl.
If you are a guy...."should" is a dangerous word. If she senses too much of an expectation of sex
it'll turn her off. So you can't show it. It should be (or at least seem) organic. You're 22 and most
22 year olds don't go on what would qualify as a date anyway. Bottom line, if you haven't slept
with a girl in a relatively short amount of time (a month or so) cut your losses and move on. It ain't
happening.
If you are a girl...I'm probably not qualified to answer.
Q
Is the mode one approach the best?
A
Never heard of it
Q
Aren't you the same Xander that was a Nightclub Promoter? How many jobs have you had?!?
Asked by MrPlaneDick on 07/03/2013
A
Shhhhhh

Xander Nightclub Promoter

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In nightlife, the product is the women. Sure the music

Clubs seek out the right crowds via promoters. Rather

deliver an abundance of attractive women to serve as

The women, of course, frequent these places to feel cool, to feel

But the reality is that the promoter

Saturday afternoon they look

So being a promoter is an easy way to get laid,

them. Over a certain threshold and hell start

frustration of not getting ...More

What makes a nightclub fail?

Asked by Ray on 03/06/2013

Drugs. Lots of drugs. I'm half joking.

strength and earning power.

office hours (answering emails, etc).

girlfriend status and alot of the time the models

Monday, March 8, 2010

Me: Hey theres Turtle from Entourage

I dont really watch much TV

Posted by Xander After Dark at 10:38 PM 1 comments

Posted by Xander After Dark at 7:25 PM 0 comments

Shirtless in the mirror

Native Habitat Jersey / Staten Island

Westwood / Beverly Hills

Shitty Indian music

Wants to sell you

Free time spent

Bragging, Waxing body hair

Has weakness for

Blonde white girls with poof in their hair

Often mistaken for

Your drain is now clogged with hair

Herpes Airport security

Tattoo Italian Flag

People (incorrectly) assume your family is

Daaavid from Brenvooood

Cousin just bought more expensive car than you

Last Name Ends In

Vowel Having to spit

I dont go to clubs to meet guys

But you just want to dance.

I guess if you worked at a brothel.

Who are you with?

Xander: Forgive me father for I have sinned

Xander: I dont go to church, youve all Ive got man!

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