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I HAVE NO INTENT OF VOIDING COPYRIGHTS AND OTHER FS I JUST WANT TO

COMPILE THE WORK AND EFFORTS OF TRANSLATION BY KUDALAKORN AND THE
GREAT NOVEL OF INDRYTIMES.

Please take with full linkback credits. This is a translated novel originally
written by [INDRYTIMES] This novel is translated with permission from the
author. Go thank her for writing such an awesome
novel @drytimes or @hedshew!

CHAPTER 1: BEGINS
Noh! How the hell did our club budget end up this little?! Oms booming
voice hits me the moment I step in. I barely got to the club room a second
ago, but that problematic document already made its way over and covered
my eyes.
I furrow my brows as I begin to read all the details (that Om lovingly shoved
into my face). I recall this number better than Aum Patcharapas birthday. I
definitely requested for 25,000 baht so that we can use it for our new drums
since the ones we have are getting too old.
So why does this only say 5,000?! What the hell happened to the other
20,000?!
Shityou know that the bills for those drums will be here soon. Are we
gonna have to go and beg on the street or something now?! Om still insists
on yelling tirelessly. Meanwhile, other club members are sitting around
looking stressful. So what does the president of this club like me should do
now?
Ill be right back.
***
The sound of my black leather shoes echos as I run toward the main office
building. Im scared that they might be closed since its getting late.
Everything in my head is all muddled right now. I dont understand how this
couldve happened. And Im scared that Ive screwed up somehow as the
president of the club. Goddamn it! When did I make this mistake?! I was so
sure that we would get the budget we requested for. I was so sure that I had
already placed the order for those drums to be delivered. How can they just
cut our budget like this?!
Bingo! The student council office is still open! I hope that Ill run into some
people who has the power to fix this.
One sec, Noh. Sure, I can wait!
I stand there staring at Phun while he flips the pages. I desperately wish that
the first words he tells me are oh yeah, we made a mistake, or the rest of
the money are coming next week or something along those lines. I have
very little hope though, the student council rarely makes any mistakes
(especially when they have Phun checking all their work). Plus, they have
never sent out budgets in increments like that before.

We didnt make a mistake, its written right here. Take a look at it, Noh.
Phun tells me what I wanted to hear the least. He passes the folder over to
me so I can see. Despite the fact that the font size is tiny, the number 5,000
written pretty much attacks my eyes that I almost fell backwards.
How can this be?!
You didnt show up for the budget meeting we had, right? Who did you send
again? Phuns words make me begin to think back. And then I remembered.
A budget meeting for the clubs and other school activity groups are held
each school year. Except I wasnt in Bangkok that day. My grandma got really
sick so our entire family went to visit her in Petchburi. Therefore, the person
who attended that budget meeting in my place was
That damn Ngoi!*
His name is actually Ngaw, but whenever I get pissed off I tend to call him
Ngoi instead (both names are equally terrible anyway in my opinion). Hes in
our club. They picked random numbers and he got chosen to go in my place
since nobody wanted to go. These meetings tend to take at least 12 hours.
Not to mention they really do take a toll on you. But why the hell did Ngoi do
this?!
I was there at the meeting. PAun from the Thai culture club kept cutting
down your clubs budget because otherwise he wouldve needed to cut from
his own. Ngaw was too afraid to go against pAun so he just sat there silently.
In the end, only 5,000 was left for your club. I was actually kind of confused
and I wondered whether you would mind this.
Of course I do. So what do I do now?! I started yelling at myself because I
have no idea what else I could do other than yelling. Meanwhile, the office is
dead silent.
The folder gets tossed on the table as Phun begins to say something.
I have another way
Tell me, Phun! Tell me right now! Ill do anything! My chance is here, how
am I supposed to throw that away?! I stare at my not-so-close friends face
waiting for the reply. I totally missed that he was giving me a weird look.
If I had known then what would happen, I would never have said those words
to him.
Noh, be my boyfriend?

CHAPTER 2: DONT YOU!?

Hey, Noh! So what happened?! As usual, Om is the one that greets me first
as I walk back to our club room in a huff. He started talking when I barely got
here half a second long.
I honestly dont know how to answer him. I mean, Im mad and all. What the
hell is that Phun trying to do messing with me like that? Ive known him
(although distantly) for a long time, but I never knew he was such a freak.
Im not a fucking homo! Asshole!
That was what I yelled at him 5 minutes ago before I stormed off the office
and headed straight back to the club room. I couldnt believe my ears. I
never thought I would ever hear those words from Phun Phumipat, the
epitome of being perfect. His looks. His family. His behavior. His grades. His
friendliness. And he even has such a pretty girlfriend too.
A pretty girlfriend?!
Righthe already has a girlfriend, doesnt he?! Shes a really popular girl at
that convent too!
Plus, Ive known Phun for a very long time. (Even though were not close at
all, because Phun is Nants friend whos friends with Rodkeng and Rodkeng is
my classmate. Was that confusing? But thats how it is though.) When we
happen to run into one another, Id smile at him sometimes. Or if I get lucky
and hes in front of the line while trying to buy something, I would ask him to
get stuff for me too. Sometimes when our club is hosting a concert, Id go to
him and sell some tickets.
It never felt like he thought of me in that way at all.
And actually, if you were to ask me which students in my school is gay, (and
there are many) Phun is probably the last person I would think of.
Maybe I heard it wrong?!
***
The weather has started to cool down now. Its probably because itll be
November soon which is the beginning of winter. Shouldnt I be spending my
time holed up in my room playing video games? But something made me get
on my motorcycle and drove to this large mansion.

Ive been to this mansion once before 2 years ago. The eldest son of this
family had a birthday party when he turned 15. Im not close with him or
anything. But were in the same grade and our homes are very close to each
other. A friend of mine who is somewhat close to this guy begged me to go to
that party with him.
I never thought that Id come back to this place all by myself. And for such a
ridiculous sounding reason too.
I park my motorcycle in front of the huge gate and I pace back and forth. I
can see the doorbell aching to be pushed right in front of me, but the reason
I am here makes it hard for me to do it.
Damn, why did I come all the way here? That goddamn Phun, if he doesnt
take that back then Im gonna punch his face in.
Before I could be satisfied with yelling by myself, I see a shadow of a tall
person walking around the garden. It steals my attention completely.
Theres only one young guy in this household!
Phun! Phun! I try to yell the name of the owner of that shadow. I didnt
want to yell too loudly (trying to be considerate) but I really wanted to get his
attention so hed know Im standing right here (damn it!).
It seems like my efforts are paying off! That handsome jerk turns around and
looks surprised. (Of course, he would never think Id show up at his house
this late) He finally walks out of the tree shades, I notice that he is on the
phone with somebody.
Oh, sorry for the interruption. -_-
But it seems like that guy isnt too bothered by this. He still looks a bit
startled to see me though. I can see that he ends the call almost
immediately.
Hey. Whats up, Noh? He exits through the small door that is part of the
gate. I still havent come up with anything to say to him yet at this point.
Uh What should I tell him? Well, I. What now?! I.
Are you here about earlier today? Banzai! Yes! Thank you for bringing that
up for me!
Yeah, that. I tell him while pointing my finger at his face. We gotta talk. I
went to the student council office this evening and I saw you there. I asked

you about the clubs budget that was cut. Then you told me that it was
because Ngoi refused to speak up during the budget meeting you had so I
I remember what happened, Noh. He interrupts me as if he doesnt feel like
listening to the entire backstory. But whatever. I know that he remembers,
but cant I just set the tone of the conversation with the backstory?!
Well, thanks for remembering. So you must remember that you told me
youd help my club too. But what did you want in return? I dont think I heard
you right. Something about being your boyfriend. I cursed at you and left.
Sorry, I think I might have hearing problems.
But you heard me correctly, Noh.
Exactly, I figured that so I came by to find out what you were actually
sayin! Huh?! What was that?! What did he just say to me? I dont think I
heard him. I really need to clean out these ears when I get home later.
I said that you heard me correctly. Will you date me?
Goddamn Phun! So you really are gay?!
And I came all the way to his house! Is he gonna do something to me?!
I suddenly get a chill down my spine as those thoughts go through my head.
Im also pretty sure that my face is currently very pale.
I turn to look at his handsome face slowly giving me a smile, clearly with
hidden agendas. Naturally, I dont want to know what hes trying to tell me.
Im certain that its time for me to leave!
Hey, Noh! Hear me out first! He wont let me leave, you guys! T^T Im
already half way on my motorcycle when he grabs my arm. T^T
My normal reaction is to turn back and face him, because I feel that it would
not be safe to have my back against him at this point.
I keep my eyes shut while I wave my arms frantically, pleading with him. My
current condition is entirely too pitiful, too pitiful to even look at. T__T Im
not like that! Please dont like me! Im sorry! I really cant date you! Im
begging him at this point, I would get down on my knees and beg if I could. I
only want him to let me go so I could leave. Im not ready for this today!
T___T
Hey! Let me finish talking, Noh! Im not like that either! Phun shakes my
entire body which causes me to finally open one of my eye.

Eh? So I misunderstood something?

Come in first, Ill explain everything.
He then drags me inside his house! Will I make it out of here?!

CHAPTER 3: DEAL!
It took a while for Phun to drag me inside the house. (I will swear on my life
that I really did try to resist, but I honestly couldnt since he was stronger
than I am) At last, my worrisome little butt is now seated under some trees in
the garden in his mansion.
Phun is staring at me, it seems as if he has about a million and 800 thousand
things he wants to tell me but he does not know which one to start off with.
Personally, Im not exactly sure if I want to listen to him anyway. -_-
Noh! He finally calls out my name. It made me jumped out of my seat. So
now, which should I do first? Should I run? Dig a hole? Call the police? Or
send a Bat-Signal? T___T
Noh, listen to me carefully. I really dont want to. T___T
Phun is staring at my face, he can clearly see how put off I am by this. He
lets out a sigh.
Im not gay. I already have a girlfriend. Girl-friend. You know her. Aim is my
girlfriend. What is with this dude? Why does he keep going back and forth
with his words? Anyway, what hes saying makes sense. I feel a whole lot
better now.
Naturally, I quickly nod as a response. Because I do, in fact, know Aim who is
Phuns girlfriend. She is our age, but she doesnt go to our school. (How can
she? Our school is an all-boys school.) Aim is very beautiful, and I mean
really beautiful. She looks pretty even when shes not wearing any makeup.
She dresses fashionably like those girls with money do. Basically, if shes
your girlfriend then theres no way youd ever be embarrassed by her.
Especially when she comes to our school, everyone stares and begins to
drool.
Everybody says that Aim and Phun are a match made in heaven. In fact, I
was one of those people. They really do look good together.
So I cant help but be curious as to what Phun will say next.
ButI want to date you, Noh.
Goddamn. Im done listening to this!

Okay, Phun. I still insist on what I already told you. I think Im gonna go, I
dont wanna listen to this anymore. I quickly get up, intending to leave. Im
not kidding around. I dont understand him at all. Why is he sitting here
trying to convince me that hes not gay? He even brought Aim up to back up
his claim. But here he is telling me that he wants to act all freaky with me.
My family is forcing me to date someone. I cant really go against my
parents wishes. I only have my little sister who can help me. She told me
that if I have a boyfriend, then shed help.
Huh? What?! O.o He spoke so quickly and for so long that I barely got the gist
of it. I only know that I need to pay attention right now.
What was that? Talk slowly and clearly.
I said that my family is forcing me to date someone. Phun lets out a huge
sigh before he continues. Meanwhile, I walk back to sit beside him like
before. Okay?
I could never go against my parents. You already know that theyre very
strict, Noh. Hes right. I still remember that birthday party 2 years ago. I had
to watch myself very carefully. I had to force myself not to curse, its worse
than trying to hold a fart. I mean, if you fart people might not know (I think?)
but if I start cursing, I knew Id get kicked out of the fancy mansion for sure.
After the party, I went to see Om.. He had to listen to me complain for about
3 hours. His ears practically went numb.
But I dont know why, they always let Pang have her way. Phun continues,
completely distracting my train of thoughts. Whatd he just say? Right, Pang
is his little sister. I vaguely remember her. Nong Pang can be quite
intimidating from what I remember. So for Phun to tell me that even her
parents are afraid of her, Im not really surprised by that. -_-
So if she helps me by talking to them, then I wont need to date whoever
they want me to. But I raise my brows. But? But what?! During our Thai
class, ajarn Ping told me that whatever follows the word but is always the
main idea. Therefore, students must pay close attention to that during
exams.
Butright now I kinda dont wanna pay any attention to him. -_- Is my main
idea clear and concise?
Can I not listen to this?
No, Noh! Let me finish. Hes so forceful! T^T

So I sit with a tired look on my face as I wait for him to continue, yet Im filled
with anticipation. What does this chill down my spine mean? Does it mean
Im gonna lose virginity to Phun?! T___T
Well, Pangis kind of like girls these days, Noh. She loves to read yaoi
mangas. I dont know whats up with her. She bought a ton of them, theyre
in her room. This conversation continues to get more frightening.
So she told me that if I have a boyfriend, then shell speak to our parents for
me. And if my boyfriend is cute, then shed try even harder.
Damn. Will someone tell me how long it has been since I last blinked?
I start to pray inside my head. I pray that Id go deaf for about 2 or 3
minutes. I promise Ill go around Sanam Luang picking up trash for 3 months
in return.
But none of the holy beings cared. T___T
And yourecute. This is the next sentence I hear.
Well, damn! Im sorry I was born smaller than you are. (Actually, Im not
short or anything, and Phun isnt tall or anything either. But anywayIm still
shorter than he is) Im sorry that I was born into a Chinese family so I have
light skin and that I could never get a tan. Im sorry that even though I barely
have double eyelids, my eyes are big and round. My lips are red toomy
friends often make fun of me that Im cute. But I never thought anything of
it. Not until tonight that I realize he has officially made me feel like
Im in hell!
It seems like he could read what Im thinking without me having to tell him
anything too.
Aw, Noh. Im sorry. I didnt mean it like that. Butits not like I can get
someone like Shane and tell Pang that hes my boyfriend, right? He sure
knows how make a case for himself. Hes bringing up Shane. Shane is the
best athlete at our school. You can probably guess that hes gigantic.
Why not ask those Angels gang for help? I ask him referring to a group of
rowdy katoeys that even us guys feel nervous around them. Surely, if Phun
asks them to help, theyd fight each other just to do that.
Pang doesnt like that, Noh. She prefers gay guys, not katoeys. And how
am I gay exactly?! I really wanted to yell that in his face.

Theres Oak, Dul, Vit. Those guys are small and cute. Theyre even shorter
than I am. Why dont you ask them for help?! Im still trying to change his
mind. It seems like Phun is at the end of his wits. He lets out another sigh.
Theyre straight like we are though. They wouldnt agree to this.
So why me?!
Because you and Ican help one another in exchange. I freeze in my track.
Am I being threaten here?
I almost forgot that I still need Phuns help. Basically, I see him as wads of
money right now.
Okay? We dont need to pretend all the time, only in front of Pang. Youll get
the money for your club for sure. Damn! Am I really willing to lose my
dignity over 20,000 baht by being Phuns wife (only in name) though?!
I stare at his smiling face while Im thinking it through. But I didnt get a
chance before I heard a high-pitch voice.
PPhun, who is this?

CHAPTER 4: !?
PPhun, who is this?
That voice spooked the hell out of me. Of course I recognize her. I know
exactly who this girl, with an innocent face and slyness hidden in her eyes
that is standing looking confused behind Phun, is.
There she is! The legendary nong Pang!
Is it too late to send out that Bat-Signal for help?!
Im in shock to see this cute girl standing here as if Im seeing a ghost. (To be
honest, a ghost would be a better choice in my current situation.) Meanwhile,
it seems Phun has this situation under control. (I think?) He simply takes a
deep breath before he turns around and gives his little sister a smile.
Heybuddy. Can you not be so cheerful? Imscared
Didnt you tell me you were heading to bed? I furrow my brows the second
I hear how gentle Phun is towards his sister. Its no wonder all those girls at
the convent are so into him. These thoughts enter my head while I raise my
brows as he pats his middle-school age sisters head. Hes such a nice
brother. For some reason, this image puts me at ease. I cant really explain it.
I couldnt sleep so I came down here to see if Dads home yet. But then I
saw you. The little troublemaker answers while she keeps eyeing me. Aha, I
look familiar, dont I? (The last time I saw her was last year during the soccer
competition. Nong Pang came to see Phun, he was working with the supplies.
On the other hand, I was working with the band. I was the one to went to get
Phun for Pang myself.)
I flash her a wide and friendly smile, showing all of my 32 teeth. (I thought I
was gonna rip my gums) I see that Phun turns to face me and smiles too.
Another chill runs down my spine.
Oh, wella friendcame by to see me. He turns back to Pang. Why did he
put such a weird emphasis on the word friend? (He even stretched out that
word!)
Friend? I can see it in her bratty little eyes. Things are starting to feel not
right to me. Are these two siblings playing some kind of a cruel joke on me
right now?!

Actually Phun begins to speak while turning to face Pang, but he also
keeps glancing at me at the same time. It doesnt seem like hes paying any
attention to the panic glances that Im giving him in return at all!
You said that you wanted to meet pNoh, so I asked for him to come meet
me. What was that?! I dare you to say that to my face without kicking me in
the shin and surprising me! Bastard! Ow! This jerk! He better watch out!
I wanted to meet pNoh?
You told methat you wanted to meet my boyfriend, didnt you?
Since when did I agree to this?!
Did I happen to get amnesia or are you just making things up on the fucking
spot?!
I was about to get up and hit him in the head, but he took my hand and
gently held it before I could.
Is this what my life has come to?
***
At last, I was dragged inside the Phumipat Resident. (I tried resisting this
time around too.) These two siblings are equally annoying. Once Pang found
out that Im about to become her sister-in-law, (Im going insane here!) she
insisted on her brother bringing me in for a glass of water. (Couldnt she
bring one out there?) As for Phun, he decided to be very supportive of his
sister. He told me that the mosquitoes will bite us if we stay outside. (Itd be
simpler if you just let me go home!)
Of course, I always lose when it comes to these arguments. Theres a saying
your mouth is drowning so the water spinach is drifting.* I finally
understand what it means now. (Did someone just say that this isnt how the
proverb goes?) So here I am sitting on the sofa in the living room of the
Phumipat Resident. Meanwhile, Pang is sitting on another sofa nearby. As for
Phunhes so close that I might as well be sitting on his lap.
Why are you so close?! Its hot! I whisper to Phun so that Pang, who is
watching an English series, would not hear. This bastard simply mocks me in
return by giving me a look.
Youre hot? Should I turn the A/C up?

No! Just move away! Why cant he think of something so simple for
himself? -_-
Instead, he gives me a sly smile. How can I do that? We need to be
convincing, Noh. The fuck is he on about being convincing?! Hes the one
doing all of this against my will!
What the fuck are you talking about? Just move! I start to get vulgar with
him. I refuse to give up in making him move away from me. He listens and it
seems like hell let me have my way this time around.
I let out a huge sigh of relief since Phun finally moves away from me (even
though were still sitting right next to each other). That relief didnt last long
since Phun decided to lean over and put his arm around my shoulders!
Seriously, man?!
I notice that nong Pang is now staring at us. Her eyes are twinkling but
theres something odd about them. It seems to be filled with warmth and
happiness, though I cant really explain it. But whatever it is, Im getting
goosebumps all over my arms.
Please just keep watching the television, Pang! T____T
PNoh, how are you getting home tonight? Its pretty late. Nong Pang
shoots me a question. Butis there more to that question? No, no, no. This is
not good. I should change the direction, itd be safer. I check my watch and
realize that it actually is pretty late. Its time I escape from this 18th level of
hell.
I rode my motorcycle here. I probably should get going. Bye, Phun. I turn
around and wave at the older troublemaker who is about to get up to see me
off. However, it seems the younger troublemaker wont let me go and
reincarnate that easily.
How can you let pNoh go off in the night like that, pPhun?! What if
something happens to him on his way home?! Wholl be responsible for
that?! What the hell? Im 17! I can take care of myself, Pang!
Uh
PNoh, spend the night here? Please? You can sleep in pPhuns room. You
cant leave tonight, its too dangerous. What am I supposed to do with a
kitten that is hanging on my arm currently? -_- If I could, I would love to kick
her and watch as she bounces away.

Those tiny lips continue to move and it doesnt seem like theyd be stopping
any time soon. PPhun, you cant just tell me that you got a boyfriend so
that Id talk to Dad for you. If you dont take a good care of pNoh, then I
wont help you. Holy shit! What the hell?! There is a 500pt exclamation
mark on my face, I might fall over.
Um, Noh. You should probably spend the night. If you go home nowheh
itll be dangerous. Hehheh. Look at him chuckling. Hes clearly laughing at
me. Goddamn Phun, if youre not gonna bother helping me then at least
dont make it worse. Ugh, which profanity should I throw in his face first?!
How can I do that? We have school tomorrow. I didnt bring my uniform with
me.
You can wear pPhuns uniform, pNoh.
I cant do that. The student ID wont match. Here goes nothing. Its the
battle on who will win this debate now.
Thats okay. Brother** rarely checks that stuff. And even if he starts asking
question, you can just tell him that you happened to spent the night at my
place so youre borrowing my uniform. Youre not helping at all, Phun!
Fucking hell! Im so touched by your kindness!
Im so touched!
. Im speechless now. Ive gone mute. I have no retorts left in me.
You should go upstairs and take a shower. The both of you. And Ill try
talking to Dad about that thing later, pPhun. Pang tells us while she shoves
our backs, forcing us out of the living room so that we can go to the
honeymoon suite (??). Phuns eyes lit up at the last sentence she said. On
the other hand, Im feeling pretty depressed about this whole thing.
What does she mean try? How long will I be stuck in this situation?!
Dont worry about your clubs budget. Ill take care of that for you too.
Phun whispers to me. I actually almost forgot about this.
Is this really worth it?! Honestly!

CHAPTER 5: JUST LET IT FLOW

I showed up at school looking battered and bruised.
Um, dont read too much into that. I know what you guys are thinking, since
technically I barely got to sleep last night. -_- But I swear nothing freaky
happened last night! I swear!
Well, how was I supposed to get to any sleep last night with Phun next to
me?! Sure, we kind of know each other, but like Ive said before, were not
exactly close. (In fact, were not close at all, period. Were barely
acquaintances who happen to walk past each other at times.)
Therefore, how does anyone expect me to share a bed with him? At his own
house? The closest Ive ever been there was just the garden (over 2 years
ago). So to just upgrade our relationship status out of the blue, where I
spend the night with only the two of us? It was too soon. Plus, everything
that has happened so far has only been within a day.
I simply wasnt prepared for all of this.
But to be honest, it was okay spending the night there. I wasnt too worried. I
took a shower, I changed into his pajamas. (I usually wear a tank top to bed,
but I figured I should stay covered up for my own safety.) We even chatted a
little bit. At first, we were gonna play his fancy Xbox 360 since he asked if I
wanted to. But I wasnt really in the mood. In the end, Phun turned off the
lights and we went to bed.
Since his familys rich, his bed is gigantic. We couldve rolled around all we
wanted. In fact, 3 or 4 people could probably sleep on that bed comfortably.
But I dont know what I ever did to deserve this.
Nong Pang suddenly opened the door.
Phun grabbed me. (He was on the other side of the bed, and we even had a
body pillow between us.) I was just about to fall asleep when he hugged me.
He was hugging me! This really did happen! Goddamn it!
I tried my best to break free. I tried shoving him off of me, but I just couldnt
compete with his strength. This jerk is so freaking strong! He looks skinny,
but you cant underestimate him. And another thing, he was in a position
where he had the advantage. All I could do struggled under his arms.

Only for a sec. He whispers to me to calm me down so Id stop struggling.

He then pretended like he was just waking up and popped his head to look at
his little sister who was standing there expressionless. She was in shock to
see her older brother embracing his boyfriend on the bed. (Take a look
carefully! Im trying to resist him here!)
What is it, Pang? Will these two siblings just finish talking and go away
already?!
Ibrought more blanketssince I was afraid pNoh might be cold She
looked so shocked, yet there was a hint of happiness on her face. Oh, no.
Nong Pang! What was going on in your head?!
Thats okay, Pang. Phun told her, I could feel that he was hugging me
tighter.
I pretended like I was dead and was no longer aware of what was going on in
this world.
PNoh wont be cold. I didnt need to open my eyes to see what kind of face
Phun was making. I knew what kind of expression Pang had on her face too.
Why do these two siblings insist on causing trouble for other people?!
RightI forgot. Hehe, I wont bother you then. Ill lock the door for you.
Click.
And then we slept separately that night. Neither of us was using the blanket
(just to be fair since there was only one). Phun turned the A/C to 25 celsius
so it wasnt too cold. At any rate, I had a very difficult time sleeping.
***
Back to the present. The second I open the classroom door and enter,
everyone is staring at me.
What? Never met Dome before?
What? Why are you staring at me? I ask them while I throw my (Phuns)
school bag on my desk. I try to avoid the gazes of my classmates. I just dont
them to start getting suspicious. (But I forget that doing this makes me look
suspicious.)
Whose school uniform are you wearing? Damn. How the hell did Keng
know? He really is capable just like his name.

What do you mean? This Noh wouldnt give in that easily! I dont care if Im
right or wrong, I just wanna argue. Although Im avoiding his gaze, I wonder
if hell believe me.
Why are you trying to deny it? Its pretty clear that this isnt your uniform.
That is not your student ID number. Its also way too big for you, unless you
shrunk last night. Hes so damn perceptive!
Plus, thats not your school bag either. Yours have that lame sticker on it,
this one doesnt. Look at him dissecting every little details!
Sowhere did you sleep last night? I was waiting to play DotA with you last
night but you never logged on. Basically, you knew about this even before
you saw me this morning? Why did this bastard have to go on and on in the
first place?
I sigh and give Keng a weary look as he tries to get the truth out of me. Om
is there with him nodding as a backup.
Yeah, I wasnt home last night.
Wow, wow, wow! So which girl were you with last night?! That fucking Om.
Always spewing shit. If I was with a girl, then why would I look like Im over
everything like this?!
What the fuck are you talking about? I got stuck with that Phun from class 1
all night. Thats all it takes for Om to suddenly back up from his chair. Keng
comes in and lifts my arms, pats my back and checks my condition.
So you finally lost it to a guy. I knew it. How was it? Did it hurt since it was
your first time? I heard Phun has a big one too. Hes so damn quick-witted
when it comes to the most fucked up things. Does Phun really have a big
one? Wait, no!
Fuck off! I just had to talk to him about something. But it was getting late so
I slept over. Thats it! Om finally returns sitting next to me. Ive had it with
that bastard.
Since when are you close with Phun? I thought you two barely know each
other.
Its that stupid Ngois fault. Hes the reason I have to be close with Phun.
Oh, right. I took care of that 20,000 we needed for our club.
Dont tell me that you sold your ass to Phun!

Smack!
That really hurt my hand but I just had to. Ive had it with Om!
Ow! Whyd you do that?! He still has the nerve to ask me that.
I saw that you kept spouting bullshit so I had to help you since it looked like
you couldnt breathe with much shit in your mouth. How do you always come
up with these stupid ass ideas? I keep on insulting him while I take a look at
my watch. It pisses me off since theres still a lot of time left before classes
actually begin. How long do I need to keep listening to these guys?!
If when time passes by, for so very long, will you have forgotten about me
by then?
A phone rings, its Do You Miss Me by Cocktail is playing. Om has been
using that ringtone for the past 3 months (Im starting to get sick of it). But it
helps by being the bell sound ending this boxing match. Sigh. I feel a lot of
relief now that I wont have to keep listening to them being smart asses. I
give him a mocking grin before I pull out my homework to see if I had
finished everything. But then I look back up, hes the one giving me a
mocking grin in return.
Your moms calling. What the hell? My mom?
I burrow my brows as I curiously stare into the LG phones screen. I open my
eyes wide, Tell her that Im not here.
What? Shes your girlfriend though. Why are you playing hard to get?
Whats wrong with Yuri? Well, I dont like her in that way, so what am I
supposed to do?! Plus, Im not good with dealing with girls, especially one
that keeps chasing me around like she does.
Om doesnt get any answers from me. He gives me a shrug showing that he
doesnt really care before answering the ringing phone. I pat him twice on
the shoulder to confirm the plan. He brushes me off as if to tell me that he
already knows.
Yes? Nohisnt here. I havent seen him yet. Good. Very good.
Ohhahaha. Youre so clever, hang on a second. What?!
Your mom realized what we were up to. He covers the phone with his hand
while whispering something Im not in the mood to hear. I dont understand. I
dont know how. How does this girl always catch on to everything?

In the end, Im the one who has to let out a huge sigh and accept that black
rectangular phone from Om. Yes? Whats up?
How come I couldnt get in touch with you at all, Noh? I can hear some
chatters in the background mixing in with her cheerful voice. Shes probably
at the school now. I think about that with a wry smile on my face.
My phones battery died.
How come you werent online last night?
I spent the night at a friends place. Is there something you need, Yuri?
Would she please just get to the point?!
Oh, hehehe. The sound of her laughter is completely untrustworthy. Im
sweating even though the A/C in our classroom is blasting away. Wanna go
grab a bite together later today? I knew it.
I have a club meeting today, I wont be leaving until very late.
Thats okay. Ill be waiting at Siam Center. Baanying restaurant, on the
second story as usual. She decides on everything on her own. This is Yuri.
Unfortunately, Im the type that cant really say no to people. Especially with
Yuri, thats even more difficult. (Speaking of which, I cant really say no to
Phun either, can I?)
I might get there really late. This is the best I can do. -_-
Thats okay, Im in no hurry. See you then. She tells me in her cheerful tone
before hanging up. In reality, Yuri is a really nice girl. Shes not picky. She
doesnt get cranky. She doesnt need to always have things done her way
like some other girls. Her only issue that she tends to decide on things on her
own. Right now, I have the title of being her boyfriend but I cant exactly
recall when we agreed on that. By the time I realize what was going on, Im
already Yuris boyfriend.
But at any rate, its not like I have anything to lose. Yuri is pretty cute. Her
father is Japanese, so shes half Japanese. Light skin, bright features with big
eyes. (Ohher canine teeth stick out too.) Shes very chatty and never gets
tired. Sometimes I do feel that she is so lively, yet bothersome at the same
time, haha.
I should probably drop by to meet her. We havent seen each other in a
week. I wouldnt want people to accuse me of not taking care of my
girlfriend.

CHAPTER 6: MEET
Noh! So whats happening with our drums?! Wow, awesome. They totally
love me. The first thing they ask about is money when they see my face.
Not much happened. Im still alive, but badly wounded. Im still running
away from the cops. I think I might hide out somewhere in Phuket.
Smack!
Dumbass. Thats not even funny. Im talking about the money for the drums,
not murder. You better watch out. Everyone that goes to Phuket always get
it.
No, thats Samed, p At this point, Im not sure whose puns are more
stupid.*
I walk around laughing as I pass pNont who had just smacked me in the
head. I throw my (Phuns) school bag on the sofa that is beside the piano. I
search the group for the troublemaker that is trying to avoid my gaze. Oh, so
he realized what he did.
ImIm gonna go use the bathroom. Hes trying to flee! Does he think he
can get away?!
Hold it right there, Ngoi! You caused this fucking mess! Naturally, this dude
isnt faster than me. Hes tiny. I grab a hold of his collar before he is able to
get away. I drag him back to publicly condemn him in the middle of our club
room.
This asshole just sat there silently during the budget meeting. He let pAun
from the Thai culture club take our budget. What should we do with him?
Aha, people are starting to get pissed off at Ngoi slowly and slowly.
Take of his shorts and draw on his wiener with a magic marker. Jeez, leave
it to Per to come up with something so fucked up. Thats a bit too freakishly
weird. Plus, its not like I wanna see his wiener.
Make him do the chicken dance at the flagpole in the morning. That one
sounds a bit too entertaining.
Make him finish everyones homework for a month! What does that have to
do with anything?!

We could use him as our slave from now until the end of this semester. He
has to do everything we tell him to do. Hm
Thats a good one, Om. Ive known you for 11 years and this is the first time
you say something I agree with the most. I turn to pat him on the back. He
grins widely but only for a moment before it fades away.
How have you been viewing me for the past 11 years then?
Like someone who I really needed to buy a muzzle for them to wear
Everyone starts laughing except Om because I basically insulted him.
Dumbass, you better watch it. Im gonna hit on Yuri the next time she calls
me.
No one is stopping you from doing that. I really hope you do succeed.
Amen! Ill even pray for him. Dont take this the wrong way, Yuri is cute and
all. But the fact of the matter is, I dont like her in that way.
Yeah right, Khun Phaen!** Look at you acting all stuck up when you have a
pretty girl trying to get with you. Youll see how it feels when she dumps
you.
Ha. Im actually Romeo.
Arent you supposed to be on your way to see Nang Wan Thong?** Didnt I
hear that you made plans with her? This motherfucker. Since when does
Romeo meets up with Wan Thong? Oh, yeah. That reminds me. I did tell her
that Id be there late, but theres nothing for me to help out at the club today.
Theyre all practicing their marching band for the soccer competition. But
that is Films job, not mine.
Yeah, Im about to head out. Anyway, I spoke with the student council about
that 20,000 we needed. Theyre taking care of that, so we dont have
anything to worry aboutI think. As Im turning around to leave, I can hear
Om is barking again.
Of course, you went as far as selling your ass to Phun. Who the fuck
stepped on his tail? Why does he keep howling? I had just mentioned that I
wanted to put a muzzle on him. Maybe I really do need to go buy one. I look
around left and right to find something to stuff in Oms mouth.
Is that true, pNoh?!
If you believe him then you should also give birth to yaks too, Knott.
Anyway, I took care of the money problem. Thats all for today. You guys can

wait for Film. Im gonna get going. Ngoi! You stay and lock up the place! If I
find out that something is missing or gets broken, then youre dead! I give
him an order mixed with threats. I cant help but laugh when I see his pale
and sweaty face. Im mad at him, that much is true. But I kinda wanna mess
with him a little in the first place.
Okay, bye. See you guys tomorrow. I head for the exit once I finished my
farewell to everybody.
***
Actually, I didnt leave the school as late as I may have exaggerated to Yuri.
But it was taking forever to get through traffic at Chareon Krung Road, (I
nodded off about 10 times) and then trying to get to the heart of the city to
Siam Center.
The sky is starting to turn orange. The red taxi I am in parks gently in front of
Center Point. I hazily pull out the bills that match the color of the cab and
give them to the driver before I continue dragging myself through the crowd
that are walking past the huge Screen Shake.
At any rateit isnt even that late. Will Yuri make a certain kind of
assumptions if I show up early? Will she think that I rushed over to see her
because Im madly in love with her?!
It doesnt really matter. Its not like I have anything to do now that Ive
arrived. Im not the type that would shop in these stores anyway. I should
hurry up and go meet her so I could leave early and go back home to play
video games.
Ive made up my mind so I rush over to Baanying Restaurant.
A cheery voice from the hostess greets me when I enter. She kindly leads me
to an empty table. Yep, the service here is still great as usual. However, the
person Ive made plans with today is probably sitting somewhere on the
second story laughing away.
Thats okay, Im meeting a friend here. I give her a simple reply with a
small nod before leaving to search the upper story. It naturally isnt too
difficult to find Yuris table considering theres a huge group of girls sitting
around a long table which are actually made of up several tables joined
together.
Did the entire convent show up?!

Noh! Youre so early! Wan ThongI mean, Yuri spots me right away. She
sure has sharp eyes! I am stunned for a moment since I wonder whether I
should be joining these 20 girls or not.
Eh? Noh? Wait a minute. That voice sounds familiar. Thats not a girls
voice either.
And if I remember correctly, that voice belongs to
Oh! What the hell is he doing here too?!
Why didnt you tell me youd be coming too? We couldve left the school
together. He has the nerves to speak to me. Wasnt it bad enough that had
to sleep with you next to me all night? Now I gotta run into you after school
too? Which temple did we go make merits together in our previous lives? Id
like to go there and undo everything. I continue to rant internally while Im
looking at Phuns face. Im not sure whether I should look surprised, pissed
off or bored. How did I forget that Yuri and Aim are friends? And since the
entire group is hanging out together, its no surprise that Phun would be
tagging along.
Noh, come over here. I ordered the brake taek that you like. Yuris voice
travels all the way over from the other end of the table. I see a pale face
smiling up at me. I smile back, thinking that if I have to go there then things
would suck even more. I decide to just sit next to Phun. Eh? He lets out a
curious noise.
Come on, just lemme sit here. Its scary over there. I whisper to him as I
point my chin to the other end of the table where Yuri is sitting. There are a
bunch of girls around there. Phun laughs, he seems to find this situation
entertaining.
Right, right. I was scared at first too. But Im glad that youre here now
though. He tells me cheerfully. Hmph! If the situation isnt forcing me to do
this, I wouldnt be sitting here next to you and make my butt feeling all kinds
of nervousness!
Since when did you two become so close? Right, I almost forgot that
Phuns here with his girlfriend. I had just realized that after I heard a melodic
voice coming from the girl sitting across from us. So Im squeezing up
against someone elses boyfriend. That makes me kind of terrible, doesnt it?
Oh! I forgot that youre here with your girlfriend. I should move. Sorry,
man. I didnt get a chance to answer Aims question (mainly because I dont
know how to answer her) and nodded quickly to Phun before I get up and
prepare myself to go sit next to Yuri. Shes still waving at me to come to her.

I wouldve been there and get to eat my brake taek happily if Phun hadnt
grabbed my hand.
Hey, dont worry about it. You can just sit here if you dont wanna go over
there. Not only he stops me, but he also pulls me over to sit on the same
chair just as I did before. Im totally caught off guard. Yuri is still waving while
furrowing her brows. She might be upset with me.
Hey, hey. Im not even gonna try to make it up to you, just so you know.
So the friend that Phun told me who spent the night at his place was you,
Noh? Aims sweet voice continues to feed me questions. Im out of words. I
dont know what to say. It feels as if Im wearing Oms muzzle around my
mouth. Sohow should I answer this? Would it sound too weird if I just tell
her the truth? Im starting to get worried.
Oh, see? Hes still wearing my uniform. Look. Phun steals my moment and
answers instead. Not only he gives an answer, but he also runs his finger on
the student ID on my chest. Arent you afraid that your girlfriend might get
suspicious or something?! If someone were to find out the real reason I had
to spent the night at your place? I dont even wanna imagine the
humiliation!
Im still in utter disbelief and Phun is still talking about the uniform that
belongs to him. Then, theres a loud sound of someone walking up to me.
Youre so mean, you wont sit with me. I still need to find a way to make
this madness stop. I scratch my head, feeling annoyed. So not only my friend
is being a smart ass to me, there is also Yuri standing there with a smile
behind me too. (What the hell do they want from me?!) If I could jump into
that glass of water and swim to the Indian Ocean, then I would.
Wellyou already have a lot of friends sitting with you, I didnt want to
intrude.
Who says youd be intruding? I wanna sit with you, Noh. I havent seen you
for over a week. I guess I could move here and sit next to you. That way, you
can sit with Phun too, how about it? She is nice enough to ask for my
response but does not bother to wait for my answer. She runs back to grab a
chair and so she can sit beside me. T___T So, this is my life now.
I didnt know youre dating Yuri. Phun whispers to me while Yuri finds a
chair so she can sit next to me. I can only give him a wry smile after I heard
that sentence. Id rather pretend like I dont know anything. Im in no mood

to go into a lengthy explanation. The point is, I dont want to paint Yuri in a
bad light.
Im here! Im here! Why are you squeezing next to Phun? Come sit with me.
I feel so bad for him. He must be sore. Yuri runs back with a chair and sits
next to me while scolding me. She even hits my shoulder. (Ow, that hurts)
Butshould I really be sharing a seat with Yuri? -_-
Thats okay, Im not sore or anything. Wow, what a gentleman Phun is. I
glance at him, my eyes filled with extreme dislike (even though he was nice
enough to let me sit with him).
No way, Phun. Come on, come sit here, Noh. Dont think that Yuri would
ever give up. Sigh. You guys can do whatever you want. I feel like Im a rope
and theyre playing tug of war with me. There I go. Here I go. Theres not
much I can do in the end but letting out a defeated sigh. I move myself and
sit on the same chair as Yuri. She seems to be really happy and is smiling
wide. (She usually smiles like that anyway though.) Now shes getting me all
these food on a plate for me to eat.
Ugh, Im so over people who are in love. Theyre being so sweet to one
another while being totally inconsiderate to the single friends that are also
here. The sound of her friends joking around is causing me to sweat
profusely. But it seems Yuri is very happy to hear those words. Shes smiling
even wider now.
You should find a boyfriend then. Whydid you have to say that to them?
How long will I be stuck in this condition? T_____T
***
Its a long while before the huge crowd of girls finally finish eating and
gossiping to their hearts content. The sun has set hours ago. I take a look at
the end of a civilization which unfolded on the table. I couldnt believe they
were able to accomplish all of this.
These girls stomachs are terrifying. The wait staff even came by and took
some of the plates away already too.
I leave the restaurant and walk along the shops that are brightly lit. I finally
reach the bus top in front of the movie theater and see the girls off around
Payathai Road.
How will you get home, Yuri? Its pretty late. I politely ask her as a good
boyfriend(?) should. She turns to me with a giant grin on her face. Her eyes
are twinkling.

Are you gonna drop me off, Noh? Ohis that what were doing?
But like I said, Yuri isnt that type of girl. She laughs after she finishes her
sentence. Im kidding! Dont worry, Im catching a cab with May. See you
later, okay? What a relief to hear her say that. Im not relieved because I
wont have to drop her off, but rather because she has someone leaving with
her.
Call me when you get home? Im not that terrible of a boyfriend, you know.
^_^
Then its my turn to head home after I saw Yuri and everyone off in a taxi. (I
didnt forget to take a photo of the license number on my phone.) I hardly
get a chance to turn around and take a step before I end up facing the guy
who has ruined my life as of late.
Ah! It doesnt matter how handsome you are, its scary to have someone
standing silently behind me like that! I thought he was a ghost! Somebody
save me!
I let out a loud cry when I saw him waiting. I feel that it is more worrying to
have him stand behind me silently like this, so I quickly turn all the way to
face him.
Youre a better boyfriend that I thought, Noh. He says while giving me a
smirk. However, it feels like this is a backhanded compliment.
What is that supposed to mean?
No, its not like that! I meant, you take such a good care of Yuri. I thought
you might be meaner to her. Are you seriously trying to justify what you
said by telling me this? -_-
Im a guy, I should watch after her a bit. Its only natural. I thought you were
gonna drop Aim off. I tell him as we take the elevator to get to the bus stop
in front of Siam Center. Naturally, Phun is following me closely since we live
in the same neighborhood.
Can you not walk behind me? Dont you get that youre making me feel
really weird?
I usually do, but I need to take you to my house, dont I?
What the hell did you just say?!

Huh?! What for?! I might be your boyfriend (only in name) but I didnt get
married and moved in with you! Does he expect me to live with him now?!
Dont you want your motorcycle that you left behind yesterday? Oh, right. I
almost forgot. Im such a mess today.
Right! Yeah, I do. Is Pang home? I need to ask about the troublemakers
whereabouts first.
Where else would she be if not at home? Haha. He laughs at me as if Im
asking him a stupid question. But, it really is a stupid question.
So I had to spend the evening being Yuris boyfriend, now I gotta spend time
being Phuns boyfriend too?! Will there be any freedom in my life at all?!

CHAPTER 7: SUCH A NICE DAY

Hello, khun Phun and khun Noh. The housekeeper already knows my name
even though Ive only been here twice, can you imagine that? I smile and
nod respectfully to the woman who is likely older than my mother. I mean, I
might be loud and vulgar, but I do have manners! Please believe me!
Auntie Noi, can you ask Uncle Nhan where Nohs motorcycle is? Phun asks
about my lifelong transportation buddy when the older woman walks over to
take his school bag. She is about to go put them away when she hears the
question so she quickly turns around and gives us a gentle smile.
Nhan is washing it for you. I told him to do that since this afternoon but he
was complaining about back pains. He finally felt a bit better so hes doing
that now. Who on earth asked him to wash it, Auntie?! Oh, my god! I feel
like such a freaking burden. Look at me, Im torturing old people!
Where is he now? I quickly and impatiently ask her. I dont want to cause
any more trouble to the people living at Phumipat Resident. Especially when I
see this aunties gentle smile, Im feeling even worse.
Hes by the garage. He had just started, so I dont think hes finished yet.
Will you mind waiting for a while longer, khun Noh? Its good that he had
just started! I throw the school bag to Phun and rush off to the garage right
away.
Uncle Nhan! You dont need to!
Splash!
I was too late. My motorcycle is now soaking wet thanks to the water hose
that Uncle Nhan is holding. -_- I wasnt able to get here in time. -_-
Im sorry, khun Noh! I will finish this right away!
Thats okay, Uncle. I should do this myself. You should probably go rest. Its
pretty late. I answer him while trying to take the hose from his hands but
Uncle Nhan runs the other way. I take a look at my watch, it is way past 8 pm
already. Im not a man if Im allowing this elderly person to wash my
motorcycle at night with this cool wind blowing.
I cant let you do that, khun Noh. This is my job. Uncle Nhan yells from the
other side of the motorcycle.

Come on, Uncle. I wont tell anybody. You should go rest. I do this myself
often anyway. I shout back at him.
But you are a guest
Noh and I will finish up ourselves. You should go rest, Uncle Nhan. A third
voice pops in from behind me. I dont need to turn around to find out who it
belongs to. Who else can it be other than the eldest son of this house? I turn
around and see Phun smiling. Its one of those smile you give when you are
certain the other party wouldnt disobey you.
Are you sure, khun Phun?
Definitely. Just leave those things there. Noh and I will handle it. Phun tells
him before he walks over to take the hose from the uncles hands. He
watches as the uncle walks away with his back hunches over, returning to
the staffs dwelling.
Here, lets do it. He turns around and tells me with a hearty grin. I
mockingly raise my brows at him in return.
Young master Phun, are you certain you can do this?
I see how it is, Noh. He sprays the water at me. Goddamn him! Im soaked!
Fuck! Now Im all wet!
Those are my clothes, why should you care? He makes fun of me. But hes
right though. This is his uniform. I check my wet clothes before I turn back up
to see Phun being busy with taking off his shirt. Yo!
Why are you so startled? Do you expect me to wash your bike wearing my
full uniform, khun Noh? Oh, so Im the one being unreasonable here? Fine,
just take it off. I think to myself as I shake my head before removing my shirt
too, but leaving on my undershirt. I figure itd be too weird to walk around
half-naked at someone elses garage. Its not like Im the owner of this place.
He only has his blue shorts left on him now.
Here we go!
Phun yells out as he sprays the water all over the motorcycle. (Im slightly
afraid that he might ruin my bike.) He doesnt forget to spray them at me
too. (Im not a freaking bike!) But dont think that Id give in because I now
hold another hose in my hands. Ahaha.

It is a fun atmosphere washing the motorcycle, even though its dark and
mosquitoes are biting us. (A lot of mosquitoes.) Phun uses one of this old
toothbrushes to scrub the pipes while I drench the shampoo all over the
motorcycle. (And also a bit on him every once in a while.) Now that I think
about it, I wasnt totally wrong when I thought of Phun as a rich heir to welloff family. (Noticeably, the huge mansion and the number of staff. Not to
mention his parents setting up dates for him, this is like a movie plot from 20
years ago.) But hes not stuck up or anything like that. He seems to work
hard (by being a laborer) with helping me scrub those pipes. And hes doing
a good job too. I keep spraying the water and shampoo at him. I feel like this
guy is quite dependable.
Its too bad that he picks on me so much!
Yo! Are you washing the bike or are you washing me?! Fucking hell! Dont
be surprised. The more we talk, the closer we get. Profanities continue to slip
out between us. And why shouldnt I be cursing at him? It seems that 80% of
time hes trying to wash me and not the motorcycle. Goddamn him. Im
wearing a tank top but it doesnt feel like Im wearing anything at this point. I
can feel the chill all the way to my appendix.
I was getting annoyed with you having that shirt on. Am I supposed to
willingly donate my blood to the mosquitoes? Its my blood!
I splash some more shampoo on him. You should finish taking the bath so
that I can trim your fur afterwards. His entire body is now covered in
bubbles. I see the look on his face and it makes me burst out in laughter.
Shit! I might get rashes now!
Thats your problem! I shout back at him as I try to dodge the sponge that
he throws my way. I couldnt dodge in time. Were both covered in car
shampoo at this point.
If we go down, then well go down together.
It seems like he isnt going to give up either. He chases after me and tries to
take my shirt off. I never knew that this capable Phun is this competitive. Its
funny though. And as if hed be able to catch me and strip my clothes! Not in
this decade! =p I jump out of his reach.
We run around the motorcycle as the chase continues. He still cant catch me
though. =p But the garage floor itself is slippery, not to mention all the
water, the shampoo and who knows what else. Adding to that, I slip on the
sponge that Phun threw at me earlier, (the one I wasnt able to dodge) so I
lose my balance.

AHHHHHHH! I scream loudly, completely expecting to get hurt. What if I

break my back and I gotta spend another night at this house?! (This is even
more scary than spending a night at a hospital.)
Ow! But the person who lets out a painful cry isnt me. I keep my eyes
tightly shut, but I notice that Im not really in any kind of pain.
Hey! Why the hell did you act like a white knight?! Doesnt that hurt?! I
realize that the person who broke my fall from behind was the owner of this
house. I cant help but scold him over it. He didnt have to be my knight in
shining armor. I bet youre in a lot of pain now, stupid khun Phun!
Who the hell said I was saving you?! You were the one who fucking fell on
me! Oh, did I? Oops, sorry. My face reveals how embarrassed I really am as I
try to get off of him. (Im currently soaking wet, you can wring me and itd fill
up buckets.) I dont think he realizes that hes still holding my waist out of
instinct.
But you know whats even more unbelievable though? Someone certainly
has an impeccable timing.
PPhun? PNoh?
***
The sound of my old motorcycle (however, newly washed) blasts through the
dark street before it stops in front of my house as ordered. What a smooth
stop, my chariot!
This is the one? He asks me after he parked the motorcycle in front of the
blue fence. This is the first time he has ever been here. Well, its not like my
house is as big as a palace like his or anything. Sorry about it.
Yeah, this is the one. Sorry if it isnt that fancy, hahaha. I decide to be
sarcastic before I get off from the back of the motorcycle. Phun was the one
who drove me here, per Pangs instruction. Naturally, if he hadnt done this
then Pang wouldnt have allowed me to leave. I wouldve ended up spending
another night with him. The insanity! If I were to spend another night, then
he might as well come ask my parents for my hands in marriage. I got a
mom and a dad too, ya know! (In my case, I call them Ma and Pa.)
You guys are probably wondering what happened after Phun and I fell on top
of one another thanks to that darn sponge while we were washing my
motorcycle. It probably isnt too hard to guess that nong Pang, the yaoi
fangirl who is also known Phuns little sister, saw us at that moment. (What a

timing!) Im not sure if it was a good thing or a bad thing. Well, I suppose its
a good thing for Phun but it was a fucking horrible thing for me, damn it! In
the end, we ended up staring into each others eyes while Pang dropped the
towels and ran away screaming (happily).
It was hilarious though. Phun and I laughed our asses off on the ground at
the garage (after I already rolled off of him!) We basically donated ourselves
to be dirty rags and wiped the garage with our backs.
I watched the night sky (there werent that many stars) from the (dirty) floor.
It was beautiful and somehow it made me feel so relaxed.
What are you talking about? I think your house looks really inviting. He
replies and completely distracts me who was daydreaming. (I almost forgot
what we were talking about.) He helps me by pushing the motorcycle inside
the house after I opened the big gate. Then I close the gate and open the
smaller door for him so he can exit.
Okay, get home safe. Im not dropping you off. Because itd be ridiculous if
I do. Wed end up just seeing each other off at our respective homes all
night. He laughs at me before giving me a wave and leaves.
Oh, as for your clubs budget. Now hes talking about something that
totally has my attention. O.O
Im still trying, so youll have to wait a bit. But I promise that youll get it for
sure. Im just glad to hear that ^____^
I nod and smile at him in return. He waves goodbye before getting on a
motorcycle for hire that happens to be passing by. Its been a chaotic day
today, but it was fun too.
Being close with Phun is kind of nice.

CHAPTER 8: TRUST
I woke up with some red marks on my arm.
I bet it was because of that car shampoo from last night. Damn that guy, he
kept pouring it on me. Stupid Phun. My light-skinned arms are now covered
with red splotches. Im not handsome anymore.
Kidding! Theyre tiny marks. =p This is nothing to me. They cant ruin my
good looks, haha! Wait, did someone just call me conceited? You better
watch it!
Speaking of Phun, it reminds me that I left my watch at his place. (I took it off
before we washed my bike. I dont want my poor Diesel to drown.) I better
call him and remind him to bring the watch to school. Im dead if I lose that
watch, my grandpa bought it for me from Australia.
I pull out my phone and call him immediately.
I had to try twice before he finally answered. I thought that he had already
gotten to school so he couldnt hear his phone ringing. But then he finally
answered!
Hey, whats up, Noh? Jeez, he sounds so drowsy, its really putting me off.
Dont tell me that he was still asleep! Its already past 7!
Arent you going to school? How were you still asleep? I scold him over the
phone, but he has the nerves to yawn in return.
Yeah, Im not going. Is there something you need? Eh?!
Yeah, I left my watch at your place.
Oh, yeah. I kept it for you. Can I bring it to you tomorrow? I dont think Im
going to school today.
Yeah, sure. But how come youre not going to school? It sounds like Im
being nosy but I couldnt help and had to ask him. Hes the student council
secretary and an honor student too, how can it be possible that he decided
to skip school on a whim? Especially since were so close to that chaotic
soccer competition event. I find this really hard to believe.
It sounds like theres some hesitation at the end of the other line (maybe I
was imagining things?). He finally finds the words in the end. I dont feel too
well. Can we talk later? Im really sleepy.

Sure, sure. I hang up the phone, but this still bothers me.
So hes not feeling well?
***
My iPhone tells me that its past 8 am now. Im in front of the huge mansion.
This is the 3rd day in a row that I invited myself over to this place. Am I a diehard fan of this place now or something? -_-
So what should I do? Should I ring the doorbell? I keep thinking as I pace
back and forth in front of the silver alloy gate. What should I do? Its way
past 8 now too. I just wanna know whats wrong with him and why hes not
going to school. If it isnt what I suspect, then Ill go to school after I find out.
But what if it is what Im suspecting?
Ugh! I just need to find out for sure!
Oh, khun Noh! Are you here to visit khun Phun? Luck is on my side this
morning. Auntie Noi happens to be walking nearby. I happily rush over to the
gate. Yes, whats wrong with Phun?
Hes not feeling too well. Why dont you come inside, khun Noh? The
elderly woman opens the smaller door to let me in. I properly greet her
before I walk to the house.
So whats wrong with him, Auntie? Dont think that Id stop shooting
questions her way. She simply gives me a gentle smile instead of answering
me.
Donttell me that you and Pang share the same ideals, Auntie. -_-
You can go upstairs and check on him, khun Noh. Hes asleep in his
bedroom. Screw it, they all can think whatever they want (Im used to it
now). I nod her way before I walk inside the house that Im starting to grow
familiar with.
The path on the second floor are so shiny from being polished. The carved
wooden door I see close by belongs to Phuns room. I walk straight to it then
I stop right in front and think.
I should just barge in! I got this far already. I turn the door knob and enter.
Did you expect me to knock first? Keep on dreaming.

Yo, Phun! I say loudly, being completely inconsiderate (and without any
manners). But I shut myself up when I see the person I just called sleeping
soundly on the bed looking exhausted.
Whoa, his entire body is red like steamed crabs (Im hungry). So it turns out I
was right after all.
I leave my school bag near the door and quickly walk up to check on him.
Phuns skin is normally very light with a shade of yellow mixed in. But now
his skin is light red, like when people get rashes from allergies. They look like
the stuff I have on my arm when I woke up this morning. However, they dont
only appear on Phuns arm but his entire body. It looks incredibly scary and
painful.
Its pretty obvious whose fault this is. I made the right choice stopping by
before school.
Because if I ended up finding about this later on, Id probably hate myself.
Your skin is easily irritated but you insisted on being stupid and played
around. I complain to myself quietly as I sit by his bed. I glance over and
see allergy medicine packs that were opened and a bottle of water. I guess
he already took them. Thats better than nothing.
You were the one who poured the shampoo on me. Oh, hes not asleep?!
This fucker is such a smart ass.
You werent asleep? Whyd you pretend to look like you were dead? I
complain while I raise my hand to hit him. But I feel sorry for the guy so I
stop. The red-looking patient still has the energy to give me a smile in return.
Its nice of you to come visit. Hilarious!
NoI only came over to get my watch. He laughs at my dumb respond.
Whatever, Ill let him off this time. So did you take your medicine? I
sneakily try to ask how hes doing.
Your watch is over there, you should head to school now. Hes all sickly yet
he still has the nerves to get smart with me. Goddamn Phun.
I narrow my eyes and stare at him. I convince myself not to injure an already
sick person then I walk over to grab my watch on the dressing table. Instead
of leaving, I sit down on the long sofa in his room. Nope, I dont feel like it.
Im just gonna hang out at your house instead.

I can hear his chuckles. It bugs me. You know, I wouldnt be here if it werent
for the fact that youre like this because of me.
So how are you doing? Is it hurting anywhere? I stop beating around the
bush and ask him how hes doing. The patient mumbles something with his
eyes closed.
Just itchy. What about your arm? Oh, he noticed the red marks on my arm?
I take a look at it and shrug.
Its okay, only a little itchy.
PKen might kick your ass if you do that, I heard hes quite possessive of
her.* This asshole.
Asshole. I always speak my mind when it comes to insulting someone.
Haha, use some of this. It helps a lot. He waves his fingers lazily and points
to an area near his bed while keeping his eyes closed. I follow his fingers and
see a tube of allergy medication so I walk over to grab it to put some on my
arm.
Did you put this on yet?
Not yet. Too lazy.
Then how are you supposed to get better?! Put some on! He orders people
to do stuff but he hasnt even done it himself. I stand there and stare at him
with an exasperated look on my face.
Phun stretches his body once or twice before he sits up on the bed. His face
used to be so handsome with a relax expression, but now he looks
unbelievably gaunt. Can you do it for me? Im too lazy. I freaking knew it.
Didnt people say that you were such a hard-working honor student and
everything? I dare those people to come take a look at him now. Lies, all lies.
Fine, fine. Take off your shirt. I tell him as I sit on the edge of the bed with
the tube of medication in my hand. I wait for him to take off his shirt which
reveals that there are red blotches all over his light skin. This is a lot.
Yeah. Ill have a fever in the afternoon. You can see the future? I guess this
happens very often.
I squeeze a white paste from the tube onto my palm. I take a second before I
decide to dive in and lather the paste all over his back. I can feel tiny bumps
on my hand that I couldnt see with my eyes. Its gonna get used up just on

your gigantic back alone. I nag him only because I cant seem to finish
putting them all over his back. This jerk looks skinny, but he has such broad
manly shoulders.
Phun laughs at my nagging before he turns around to face me once I finally
finished with his back. Tired? This lazy ass has the nerves to ask.
Yes! I am! You can do the front yourself. I dont wanna turn you on or
anything. I say it as a joke but Phun looks at me with hidden agendas in his
eyes.
I was already turned on.
Fuck that, then finish up by yourself. Ugh! I throw the tube over to him. I
can hear his laughter.
I was kidding! Finish up already, Im cold.
Then why the hell did you turn the A/C on so high? Have you lose your mind
or something? I may be complaining but Im already squeezing another
white paste onto my palm just as I had been asked.
Theres only the sound of the air conditioning unit filling up the room.
I dont know what else to say to him. Hes not exactly inviting me to chat
either. This only makes me feel even more unnaturally stiff. I admit, my hand
starts to shake when I happen to meet his eyes right before the tip of my
fingers touch his chest.
Damn it, why am I so nervous? Were both guys here. And he doesnt have
boobs like the DVD that Om torrented for me.
I try to count to ten slowly in my head as I spread the medication over his
broad chest. It is undeniable that Phuns physique is quite toned. Hes slim,
but not lanky. His muscles arent too big, but theyre not too small either. If it
werent for the fact that he has red blotches all over him right now, I bet any
girls would want him if they were to see him like this.
I continue to spread the medication all over him since Im afraid that if I put
too little then they wont take any effect. My palm moves from his shoulders
to his stomach then it arrives to his left chest.
As Im rubbing his chest, I can feel something moving violently underneath.
The heart is beating so fast, as if its owner is feeling nervous about
something.

This causes me to furrow my brows and I pause my hand over where his
heart should be. I look up to face him, but he is pretending to look elsewhere.
What? This is making your heart beat fast? Hahaha.
Id be dead if werent beating. Listen to him, he has the balls to argue with
me. He can be pretty funny when hes shy.
I smirk at him before I finish up. Then I twist his nipple because it feels like I
could just eat him up. Ow! What the hell?!
I couldnt help it, now go back to sleep. Put your shirt back on too so you
wont catch a cold. I still need someone to take care of my clubs budget
problem. I help him put his shirt back on and I see that he wanted to hit me
in the head with his knuckles. I cant help but laugh.
Im gonna sleep, feel free to help yourself with the game consoles. You can
go downstairs and get some lunch later, its cool. He tells me before he
wraps himself with the comforter like a small child would. I move away from
his bed and give him a nod.
Ill have a fever in the afternoon, mind taking care of me then? He
mumbles from underneath the heavy comforter.
Yeah.
It feels really nice to have someone who trusts you, doesnt it?

CHAPTER 9: DISABLE
Boom!
The loud sound blasts through from Phuns home theater system. It makes
me feel like Im being mocked for losing with the words Game Over flashing
the screen. I throw the controller out of frustration for losing exactly a dozen
times.
Stupid Xbox. Youre not that fun to play with. The game AI totally cheated. I
think (blame others) while I lay down on the carpet, out of ideas on what to
do next.
Who can be nice at every hour? Im a person, not a character in a drama on
TV.
Who the heck is calling me? I glance over to see my phone ringing and
vibrating by the school bag that I left on the sofa. A part of me is lazy and
doesnt feel like answering, but the other part of me is afraid that this would
disturb the owner of this bedroom and he might wake up.
So I hop over quickly and grab my phone.
Sup, asshole? Its Om.
How come youre not here today?! I got disciplined by the Brother so now I
gotta take out the trash in their offices in the evening. Oms alarming voice
comes through, I cant help but laugh at his predicament. And how the hell
did you get yourself in trouble?
I was chatting with Mong, MSN paper style.
Howd you get caught passing notes?
It was taking too long passing the notes around so I threw it at him. The
Brother turned around and saw me. Dumbass. Serves him right.
You think that I was being a dumbass, werent you? Asshole. What the
fuck? Whyd did he have to insult me?
So where are you? If youre not here then whos gonna help me take out all
the trash? So basically, hes not worried about me or anything. He just
wants someone to help him. What a wonderful friend.
Just running a little errand.

What errand? Or are you still with Yuri since yesterday? He always think of
the dirtiest things. If he were here, Id smack him in the head.
Asshole. This is the politest word to use for someone like him.
But before I could hear Oms reply, there are faint noises coming from Phun.
Coldcoldcold
Who are you with? Holy shit, not only he barks like a dog but he has good
hearing like one too. I have no time to explain now. Hey, I gotta go.
Coldcold Phuns voice gets progressively shakier.
Whos there with you?
Ill see you Monday. I cut him off and hang up. I hop over to the A/C remote
control and turn it all the way up to 30 degrees Celsius. Its gonna be damn
hot.
I stare at the numbers that had just been changed and I can already feel that
Im getting warmer. I take off my shirt and throw it over the sofa before I
walk over to check on the patient who is curling up on the bed.
It seems that he really is freezing. Hes gathering all the comforter he can
get around him. His lips and his entire body are shivering agonizingly
Even if I were failing my health class, I can recognize that he has a fever just
like he told me earlier. I start to panic since Ive never had to take care of
anyone like this before. The first thing I decide to do is putting my hand on
his forehead to check his temperature. Hes as hot as an iron!
Are you sure you dont need to see a doctor?!
Im panicking even more now. I order my legs to pace back and forth for a
long while before I finally come up with an idea that I should probably go and
get someone to check on him. Just as I am about to run out the door, my
entire body gets pulled over.
Hey! I struggle with burning arms around me, while being completely
startled. This damn Phun pulled me over and is holding me captive. Very
tightly too. I try to wrestle myself away from his hold on me but this jerk just
would not let go. Isnt he supposed to be sick? Why is he wrapping himself
around me so tightly like an anaconda?

Goddamn Phun! Let go! Im trying to break free because Im not used to
this, and I also want to leave so I can find someone to help him too. My
forehead is rubbing against his neck, the noises I make are barely audible.
He is completely unaware of what is going on and hugs me even tighter.
Coldcold I can still hear his hoarse voice coming through nonstop. I
finally stop struggling.
I raise my head, (with much difficulty) and look at Phuns pale face. Some of
the red marks are starting to disappear revealing his pasty face. I stare at his
furrowing dark brows and his eyelids that are closed tightly. Hes clearly in
agony. His eyes are usually bright and cheerful, yet full of mischief. His lips
are normally tinted light orange like girls would have if they were wearing
makeup. But now, hes looking very weak that he hardly resembles his
normal self at all.
I dont like this at all. I need him to get back on his feet and joke around with
me again.
When I realize this, I decide to just let my whole body sits on top of his broad
chest and allow its owner to hold me. Hes still moaning about being cold. I
hope that this will help, even just for a little bit.
I dont know if Im imagining this, but he seems to be calming down. His
muscles are less tense and his body temperature is returning to normal.
***
I could be brown, I could be blue, I could be violet sky.
I hear an unfamiliar ringtone breaking the silence. This is the reason I woke
up and found Phun and myself holding one another as if were one person.
-_- More importantly, Im still face down on top of him too. (Im freaking
sore.)
Do people usually go this far when taking care of someone with a fever?
(Nope.)
I could be hurtful, I could be purple, I could be anything you like.
Mr. Mika is still singing away from Phuns cellphone. Although I do like this
song, I need to wake the owner of the phone up. I violently nudge him so he
would come to, because one, its so loud and its annoying me, and two, I
need him to let go of me already!

Phun is startled when I nudged him. He wakes up and sees the condition
were both in and now he is even more startled. Yo!
Dont even. You did this to me. Hes so scared as if I was the one who
forced myself on him. I tell him while glancing his way. His chin is barely
touching my nose.
Whwhat did I do to you? Get your mind out of the damn gutter. He is very
taken back by this. He doesnt even realize what hes done. -_- Im really
over it. -_-
Nothing, nothing. You spiked a fever and kept saying that you were cold. I
walked over to check your temperature and you apparently mistaken me as
a heater and grabbed me. This is how we end up like this. I explain things to
him scene by scene. He finally understands and nods. He has some colors
back to his face now and isnt as pale as he was this afternoon. Im happy for
him and all, but
If youre caught up to whats going on then let go of me already.
Right, sorry, sorry. He shoves me off of him right away. Great. I back up
from him and sit up on the bed. I crane my neck left and right since I slept
weirdly. Your entire body is sore when you sleep on top of someone, seriously.
Why dont you like me? Why dont you like me? Why dont you walk out the
door?
At this point, Mr. Mika has finished singing the hook of his song. I dont want
him to get tired of singing so I look over at the black Nokia phone on the
table, then I glance back at Phun. You gonna answer that?
Can you find out whos calling? Oh, ordering me to do stuff again? But I
walk over and check the phone without any protests. Im letting him have
things his way just for today.
I see a couple photo lit up brightly on the Nokia N81 screen. Aim I was
just reading what was written on the screen.
Oh, Ill take it, Ill take it. Phun annoyingly motions his hand for the phone.
Of course, your girlfriends calling. I quickly walk over and pass the phone to
him since I dont want the person on the other line to get upset.
Hello? Hey. Im at home. Eh? What is it? Oh, Im sorry. Can we do that
tomorrow? I dont feel well today and Id like to get some rest. Im sorry.

How come?! But you already promised me that youd go with me today!
O_o?! I was curious as to why Aim has called and I finally found out when I
heard her booming voice coming through the phone. The person next to me
doesnt even bother putting the phone up to his ear. Phun stretches out his
arm and gives me a wry smile when he sees that I have a startled look on my
face.
ButYeahSure. Ill go pick you at the school this evening. See you then.
Dont tell me youre gonna go on a date. Doesnt this jerk realize hes still
sick?
Its not a date, Aim wants to go buy some shoes. He lethargically answers
me as he places his phone near his pillow. I quickly grab it and put it back
where it originally was since I heard that leaving a phone near your pillow is
actually bad for your health.
Leaving the house even though youre still sick is bad for your health too.
Thats the same thing. Are you really gonna go in this condition? I ask him,
completely feeling very frustrated. Phum simply puts his hand on his
forehead and slowly closes his eyes.
Im doing a lot better now. Plus, I did make a promise to Aim that Id go
beforehand.
We might be close now, but Im in no position to overstep my boundaries
when it comes to his personal life.
I have nothing else to say to him so I let him sleep. My head is filled with
many thoughts.

CHAPTER 10: ALL I CAN DO

I feel like my life is a rerun episode of some show because I am back here
again, even though I was here just yesterday.
There are a lot of students and various types of workers nearby that are
strolling around Siam Square, the trendiest and busiest spot in Bangkok. To
be honest, the next thing I dislike most after snakes is actually walking
around Siam Square because its just so chaotic.
And really, if it werent for the fact that this is important then I wouldnt have
come here. However, I waved goodbye to Phun about half an hour and I have
been secretly following him since.
I complain in my head as I keep tabs on Phun, who is not too far from where I
am. I keep having to dodge him so he wouldnt see me. And since Im tailing
behind him, I can see all the girls that walk past him looking back and
giggling among their friends. This is kind of funny. I wouldnt have known
that he is such a hot commodity if I havent been following him like this.
I continue following him until he arrives at the place where hes meeting
her.
But it seems like Aim isnt here yet. I watch as Phun walks into the newly
opened Starbucks next to Pachino restaurant. I can see him clearly as he sits
down next to the glass walls. (Well, technically all their walls are transparent
glass.) So I decide to pretend to walk around in the area near Jousse store so
I can keep an eye on Phun. He cannot see me though, he has his back to me.
I get angrier seeing Phun sitting there reading while he waits for Aim. That
woman forces my friend (who is sick) to come out and see her, yet she has
the nerves to show up late? This is just too frustrating.
I keep pacing back and forth around that area so many times that one of the
shopkeepers there is getting suspicious, so I decide to walk to a booth and
buy a drink. I come back and Phun is still sitting there in the exact same
spot. Is he meeting his girlfriend or just looking a new spot to read?
Half an hour later, I finally see Aim walking up to Starbucks, still wearing her
school uniform. Luckily, her skin is so bright that I spot her just in time to get
out of her sight. I immediately pretend to be a shopper at Jousse. (The
shopkeeper is probably bewildered since I kept walking in front of the store
for ages before actually coming inside.) Because I know that my bright blue
pants stands out as much as she does. These convent girls are quick to spot
our blue pants that we wear.

I pretend to check out the clothes in the store (all women stuff) while
glancing back occasionally to check on them. On the surface, they seem
pretty cheerful. But I remember that before Phun left his house, his fever was
already returning.
Thats why Im so concerned.
I patiently wait for those two to finish their coffees and cakes. It is a long
while before they finally leave. Following them easier than watching them in
one place. At the very least, I wont have a shopkeeper giving me weird
looks. I continue to follow them on the bypass. I recall that Aim wants to buy
some shoes.
But once I pop out of the bypass, I am startled by the sheer amount of
people parading around this place. There are so many people that Im
starting to fear that Phun wont last. There are so many women stopping by
to shop before they head home. The pathway to walk is already narrow as it
is. I anxiously keep an eye on Phun. Not only hes still sick, but I see him
carrying Aims school bag and another tote bag too. I really want to smack
him in the head for being unreasonably courteous.
I watch as Aim enters and exits stores after stores. But it doesnt seem like
she has bought any shoes, or anything for that matter. What? Is it that
difficult to shop for shoes? Is she trying to searching for a pair of Cinderellas
glass slippers? Why didnt she think about what kind of shoes or which stores
to visit before hand? Why is she dragging my friend around like this?
I admit, Im incredibly annoyed at this point. I continue to chew on the straw
as I follow them for a long while that Im starting to get sore myself. Plus, the
sky is now turning purple too.
At last, the three of us arrive to the bonanza area, which is even more
crowded than the previous area. -_- Why is everybody here? Is there a store
giving free stuff? Ill bring some back home for Ma. I doubt that someone like
Aim would ever buy anything from this place though.
Just as I suspected, those two walked around aimlessly. (I almost lost them a
bunch of times.) From the first floor to the third floor, then they went through
to 29 Plaza. They leave without buying anything at all. I still see only the
school bag and a tote bag in Phuns hand. (How is he lasting this long?)
Phun is practically dying, cant you fucking see that, Aim?!

I get more and more frustrated the longer I follow these two. We continue
along the side streets near Siam Square for a while before Aim takes Phun
inside a womens clothing store.
I look up and read the stores sign which says Indy. This is one of Yuris
favorite stores as well. I shake my head, theres no way Im going inside such
a tiny store. I decide to walk over to Dokya bookstore and wait there while
checking out some books.
After a long while, long enough for me to finish about 3 comic books, I see
that those two finally leave the clothing store. (Of course, I had already
ducked inside the bookstore.) I cant help but wonder if she actually bought
everything in that store because what I see in front of me is a huge bag in
Phuns hand. I have no idea if they are clothes or shoes. I just hope that
shed let my friend go home now.
Butwhy are they heading towards Siam Paragon?! -_-
I haul myself after those two loving couple without giving up. Jeez. Im pretty
tired, I cant imagine what condition Phun is in. Hes still sick and hes being
ordered to continue with this marathon. If I could then Id run over, grab him
by the collar and drag him home myself. But I dont think Phun would be cool
with that.
Siam Paragon isnt as busy as the other areas, but this place is gigantic. Im
already feeling tired thinking about how massive this place is. Dont tell me
that she intends to make my friend walk all over this place too. Hes gonna
die! (If not him, then me.)
I keep tailing them until they enter a fancy brand name store. (My aunt is a
regular at this place.) Okay, then. Theres no way Im following them in there.
Im circling around that area while practically going nuts because Im getting
really worried about Phun. I saw his face before he went inside. He was
almost as pale as he was this afternoon.
Who can be nice at every hour? Im a person, not a character in a drama on
TV.
Holy shit! My phone is ringing loudly in my pants pocket. I quickly answers
without even looking at the caller ID.
Hello?
Whatcha doing, Noh?

Its Yuri!
I stammer, but then I realize that Im not even doing anything wrong. Just
running an errand, whats up?
Not much, I heard that you didnt go to school today so I called to see how
youre doing. I was worried because I thought you might be sick. Those
words actually made me smile.
Who reported all this to you?
I got people, hehe. Im glad that youre not sick though. Where are you right
now? Its so loud. If I tell her Im at Siam Paragon, she would want to come
see me. She usually spends her time here after school. The little gears in my
brain begin to spin.
Just running an errand, I gotta go. Bye. And there I go! I dont care of
someone will accuse me of being too cruel, I just need to save myself in my
current situation ^^
Phun and Aim show up only a few moments after I hung up the phone. I see
a bright red bag with the stores logo on it. I watch them agree on something
before they head to the malls entrance.
Theyre finally leaving?! Thats more like it! I throw my first into the air and
almost forget to run after those two.
Phun is standing in front of the mall while carrying everything (a school bag,
a tote bag, and two more shopping bags) as he waits for a taxi with Aim who
is holding a smoothie that she bought from the food hall in Siam Paragon.
The line to catch the cab is pretty long as if people are waiting in line to buy
pBird Thongchai concert tickets. I notice that Phun is swaying back and
forth.
I squint at my friends tall figure leaning back and forth. Even from this
distance, I can see that hes white as a paper. Im starting to get really
scared. And then, what Ive been so afraid might happen actually happens.
All the items Phun is holding fall to the ground along with his body. I refuse to
let this scene continue so I rush over to catch him with my entire body before
gravity can take control and cause his head to hit the pavement.
Phun is burning as if hes on fire. Phun! You okay?! I ask even though Im
not expecting any answers. I shoot a panic look at the nearby security guard
so that he can get us a taxi.

Noh?! I hear Aims puzzling voice, but I dont care about anything else. I
drag Phun from the taxi queue so he can sit near the waterfall. I loosen his
belt and grab all of Aims bags that were on the ground.
Aim walks over next to me. But as of now, I dont even look at this womans
face. I knew I shouldnt have let this happen. To be honest, I should be hating
myself for allowing this to happen to Phun because I was the one who let him
to leave the house.
Phun hasnt been feeling well today. I tell her without looking at her so I
have no idea how shes reacting to this whole thing. Im finding it difficult to
control my emotions right now.
Noh! Holy shit! I flinch with all my might when I hear a sharp voice calling
my name. I dont need to look to see who it is. Why does she have to show
up now of all times?!
How come you didnt tell me you were around here, Noh? Oh, Aim? Phun?
She asks as she rushes over to where I am. Shes smart enough to catch on
when she sees an unconscious Phun sitting near me and decides to stop
talking.
I told you I was running an errand. You and Aim can get yourselves home,
right? Im gonna get Phun out of here first. Im not sticking around to wait
for an answer and shove all the bags to Aim before I help an unconscious
Phun into a taxi with much difficulty.
Itd be bad if I take him to his house. I guess Ill take him to mine for now.

CHAPTER 11: OPEN MIND

This guy keeps drifting in and out during the cab ride.
I periodically glance at his facewhich is no longer handsome nowwhenever
it feels like hes being too quiet. I grab a hold of his arm trying to check his
temperature. Im doing this to also let him know that Im right here with him
and that Im not leaving him.
Hes burning up so terribly that I cant help but tell him this. Lets just go
see a doctor. But of course, no matter how much I semi-force him, beg him,
plead with him, or threaten him, he insists on telling me what he told me 15
minutes ago. Its okay, Ill be fine after I get some rest. Do I look like a
fucking nurse to you? T_____T
I keep shaking my leg impatiently inside the taxi while telling the driver
which turn to take. Soon enough, the blue taxi parks in front of my house.
Not as fancy as your place, hope you can sleep here. I tell him sarcastically.
But what I get return is faint laughter. He doesnt have enough strength to
insult me back, I know that much. Haha.
I run into Ma and Pa in the living room when I carried Phun inside. What
should I tell them?! Their son brought a guy home. Ma and Pa cant possibly
think the same ways as the people at Phumipat Resident do, can they?
Hahaha
Hi, Pa! Ma! Im being a good kid even though Im dying to rush to my
bedroom. (Im scared that Phun might die on me.) But I had to pay proper
respects to my parents for the safety of my assets (as in my allowance).
Did you have dinner yet, Noh? Eh? Whats wrong with your friend? Ma is
the first one to notice something is wrong. But she asks so loudly that Pa
turns around and look too. Whos that youre carrying?
Hehello. Phun pitifully greets them. Hes so sickly yet he bothers being so
polite, honestly. I think this to myself as I see him weakly raising his hands to
pay respects.
This is my friend. Hes too sick to get home. Can he spend the night?
Quick, take him upstairs so he can lie down, Ill bring some medicines. Isnt
my ma so adorable? Actually, everyone in this house is very kind. Otherwise,
Om, Keng and the rest of the guys wouldnt visit so often.

Once I get the green light, I hastily carry Phun upstairs and head to my
bedroom.
***
Sleep here. Sorry the bed isnt as big as yours. I help Phun get on the bed
with much difficulty. He looks a lot more comfortable now that there is a
mattress supporting his back.
He mutters his thanks softly but Im not really paying any attention. Im too
busy checking the A/C so that itd help with Phuns current body
temperature. I constantly keep an eye out on him so that the room doesnt
get too cold.
Due to his high fever, he is clawing for my comforter as if it is a priceless
treasure. Sigh. He really should have taken a better care of himself.
Knock knock.
Come in.
I brought the medicine for your friend. He has a fever, am I right? I smile
wide when I see the bottle of water and the medicine bottle. Thats right. Ill
have him go thank you once he wakes up.
Thats alright. So who is this? Ive never met him before. Did you let his
family know yet? My ma usually only see that bastard Om, that asshole
Keng, and the rest of the losers. Someone with a good reputation like Phun
has never been to this house. I do feel sorry for her.
Hes a friend from school, Ma. His name is Phun. Hes sick so I carried him
here. I was about to call his family to let them know. I answer her while
looking at the person on the bed who is sleeping soundly. I let out a huge
sigh of relief.
Change his clothes and wipe him down with a wet towel, sweetie. He cant
be comfortable sleeping like this. She tells me before she leaves my room.
Oh, right. I completely forgot about that. I really shouldnt let him sleep in his
jeans like this.
I glance at the guy who is dozing off on the bed before I walk over to grab a
bowl, a small towel and a set of clean clothes.
Phun. Phun. Phun! Wake up and take the medicine first. It took a while
before I could shake him awake. I give him the pill and the water, then I let

him go back to sleep. He looks terrible. I guess I can forget about making him
wipe himself down on his own.
Wanna wipe yourself down first? You wont be comfortable sleeping like this.
Ill help you. I nag him while I take off his shirt. I had a really tough time
taking it off. (So youre not even gonna do this yourself either?) At last,
theres a shirtless guy laying on my bed. His chest is moving up and down.
Its hard to tell whether he has fallen asleep again or he has no energy left to
move.
I end up not saying much, instead I wring the soaked towel and wipe him
down. I start from his sickly pale face that has started to get some colors
back, and then to his slender neck which is having a hard time trying to
make noises.
I stare at Phuns face as I move to his long arms. Hes not burning as hot as
when he was in the taxi. Hes still very warm though. I switch back and forth
between his neck and both his arms before moving on to gently wiping his
chest.
I soak the towel in water and wring it once more before I go back to
meticulously wiping down his chest since he has roamed and sweated his
way around Siam. I just want him to feel comfortable. It seems that he
tenses up when I get to his stomach.
Ah The fuck did he moan for?!
Why the fuck are you moaning?! Youre making this weird. I yell at him and
push down on his stomach hard enough that I can feel his muscles. He lets
out a soft chuckle.
You got me feeling nervous. Maybe hes not so sick if he can talk back to
me.
Its about to get worse. Take off your pants. I bluntly instruct him as I throw
the towel into the bowl of water. Phun snaps out of his daze and widens his
eyes.
Huh?!
Why the hell are you so startled? Are you gonna sleep wearing your jeans?
If youre feeling better now then you can take them off yourself. Unless you
want me to do it for you? I scold him with my hands on my waist. I can look
threatening at times, haha. I stare at the guy whose face is still in shock. I
shake my head before I move in and begin unbuttoning his pants and pulling
down the zipper.

Yo!
Why are you being so damn demure around me? I promise that I wont tell
anyone if you have a small one. Well, except the music club members, the
student council members, the rest of the 11th graders, and your girlfriends
friends at the convent. Doesnt that sound nice? Hahaha. Naturally, Phun is
holding on to his jeans as if this is the last precious item he has left.
Wewe dont really need to do this.
What the hell?! Were both guys here! Quit being so annoyingly selfconscious! Just take it off! Take it off! Take it off! Take it off! It isnt like a sick
patient can fight against a healthy guy like me. I dont need to use that much
strength to pull his hands off the jeans and pull off his last piece of clothing.
Get your mind out of the gutter! I didnt take off his boxer or anything!
Just dont get a boner while Im wiping your legs down, I cant handle that.
I remind him ahead of time before I wring the towel and go back to cleaning
him up. I hear him laughing, it seems he can finally relax. I cant help but feel
elated since I won against him over something today.
I leave to take a shower after I finished with Phun to freshen myself up. I had
already turned both our phones off so that he can sleep without any
disturbance.
I begin to think about the stuff that has happened so far as the water run
down on me.
Phun and I have actually known each other for a long time since our school
starts from middle school all the way high school. So its not that strange for
us to have seen each other ever since we were little kids. (Phun wasnt a
handsome kid though, hahaha.)
From what I can recall about Phun, hes a really nice person. Its not a stretch
to say that hes pretty much perfect. Hes tall, handsome, smart and comes
from a rich family. (This is beginning to sound like a slogan.) Hes known for
his good behavior. Hes talented when it comes to music, sports and
languages. He basically has everything. More importantly, his girlfriend is so
stunningly beautiful that people cant help but talk about her.
The strangest part though? For someone who is irritatingly perfect, I have
never heard anyone spoken ill about Phun at all. Nobody seems to hate him.
There isnt anyone out there who is bitterly jealous of him.

I used to think about this often, back when I havent gotten to know him. I
wondered why, since us guys tend to have huge egos. Its tough for us to see
others who are doing better than we are. There are people who just hate
someone elses guts and fights break out. However, this has never happened
with Phun. Everybody trusts him and he has so many good friends
surrounding him.
I have always been so curious about this. I finally know the answer thanks to
the past few of days.
It is because Phun is more than someone who is perfect. For me, I can see
past all these so-called perfect skills that he has. In the these last three days,
he has proven to me that his perfection is actually simply him being a good
person without ever boasting about it to anybody.
Phun treats everyone around him with great care and pure intentions. I can
see it by the way he treats Aim, the way he treats me, and the way he treats
those around him. He can be such a smart ass at times, but hes someone
worth keeping around rather than kicking to the curb.
Now that Im closer with Phun, I no longer question why everyone seems to
like him so much despite the fact that our school has a bunch of guys who
are cooler than him.
Those eyes that are filled with courage and sincerity is the answer.
Phun is truly more than just all those things.
I see that Phun is sleeping soundly when I step out of the bathroom. Hes
wearing the new set of clothes that I brought for him.
I place my hand on his forehead and notice that he has cooled down a bit. It
seems that hes still freezing though, I can hear him mumbling in misery.
Im gonna turn off the lights now. I normally dont sleep this early. But if I
were to ditch this sick person to sleep by himself while Im off playing DotA,
then wouldnt that make me a really awful person? ^^
I try to listen to his reply, but I can only hear him muttering something
unintelligible. I assume hes giving the permission for me to turn off the
lights, haha. So I turn off all the lights in my room, leaving only the moonlight
shining through gaps of the large balcony door. Theres enough light for me
to see Phuns face.

I cant help but wonder what hes thinking right now because hes furrowing
his brows. A small grin forms on my face as I reach over to rub his back
gently, hoping that this might help a little.
Mmm He lets out a soft cry when I touch him before he curls himself up
even more. I grow weary since the A/C is on so low, its working as a heater
at this point. Goddamn this guy.
Cold This is his catchphrase as of late. I chuckle softly before I lie down
on the bed.
I watch as my friend continues to shiver. After a few moments, an idea pops
into my head.
I grab his arm and put it across my body. I expected his surprised reaction.
He stares at me with questions in his eyes.
I grin at him. Arent you cold? Im willing to be your heater for another
night. Were friends, this is not such a strange thing to do, right? (Although,
Ive never done this with Om. Crazy people never get sick. Om never even
had a cold. Sometimes I wish hed get sick just so hed be a little more
quiet.)
Phun seems to be surprised by what I told him as well. His hand is shaking a
little, but I dont exactly know why. II shouldnt. I dont want to be a
burden to you. Um, isnt it a little too late to be saying that, buddy?
I sigh at his stubbornness before I lean over and place my head on his warm
chest. Then, I wrap his body with my arms. Yeah, youre totally being
considerate. Didnt your fever go down when you held me this afternoon?
You might as well do the same tonight. Its Saturday tomorrow, youll get
plenty of rest. I tell him as I get my head closer to his chest. It seems like
Phun is still unsure whether he should treat me as his personal heater.
II dont want you to get sick too.
Im not some weakling, I wouldnt get a fever so easily like you do.
It wasnt that simple, you drenched me in that damn shampoo.
Be quiet and go to sleep. Why does he want to argue with me? Does he
have that much energy? Im getting pretty sleepy myself, so I nudge at him
as a reminder that he needs to rest.
After a while, Phuns body is less tense. He slowly and reluctantly places his
arms around my body.

I lay there against his heated body while being completely still. But then, I
can feel that someone decides to embrace me with all his might.
In this moment, I dont know for sure what it is were really doing. I only
know that I want to hold him, no matter what the reason might be.
We listen to each others heart beating in unison under the soft moonlight.
Sweet dreams.
Good night.

CHAPTER 12: CONFUSED

Its Saturday morning and I am the first one to open my eyes.
I said he could hold me and he definitely took advantage of that. Jeez! Hes
still stuck on me like a glue too! I glance over to look at his arm as I curiously
think to myself as to how I laid here still enough for him to hug me. (I usually
move around so much that stuff on my bed end up on the floor by morning.)
I crane my neck up to take a look at the person holding me as if I were his
wife. Wait! This is not a good analogy! Take two! I crane my neck up to take a
look as if I were someone who owes him money.
Ohthe first one was better? Whatever. You get what I mean. Basically, hes
holding me really tightly.
I mean, Im still trying to crane my neck to look at him from the end of his
chin, but Im not very successful. (Im too sore.) I can only feel the shaky
breaths from his nose since hes still asleep. Ah, Im getting really warm now.
The A/C is on but it might as well not be. I get in closer to Phun so I can
gauge his temperature. (Stop having dirty thoughts.)
Hes a lot cooler than he was yesterday. Hes still a little warm, but I can tell
that his fever is going down from the beads of sweat on his chest.
Well, I should go and be a good host. I try to break myself free from his stiff
arms, but I barely get a chance to move before Phun wakes up.
Huh?
Let go for a second, Ill be right back. I tell him while I duck under from his
arms, however their owner wont let me go free.
Where are you going? Why is he being such a problematic patient? -_- I
shoot him an annoyed look. Just let go.
He lets go once he hears the sternness in my voice. Haha, as if Phun
Phumipat can compete against Noh the Great! Theres no way!
I roll away from his chest and catch my breath for a bit. Its only natural for
anyone who has been held so tightly for an entire night to do this. I adjust
the temperature and make myself a little more comfortable before I gain
enough energy to drag myself out of the room.

Just rest! Ill be back soon! He better be resting when I get back or hes
gonna get it.
***
Nong Noh, youre up early today. PAnn, who is technically my nanny,
greets me with a cheerful voice this morning. But, is it really that early? -_-
I look up to check the clock on the wall, it says 10 oclock. I am up pretty
early today. Im usually not up until the afternoon, hahaha. I guess I got
really hot and that woke me up. -_-
Whats there to eat, pAnn? I ask about food first and foremost. This is how
she knows that this is, in fact, the real Noh. I shouldve looked before I asked
though, since shes carrying a large laundry basket. Our family doesnt have
a bunch of staffs like Phuns place. We only have pAnn and pIm who raised
me ever since I was little. Were so close that we consider ourselves siblings.
At any rate, where the heck is pIm today?
Im bought some marinated pork from the market earlier this morning. Were
thinking about deep-frying those and make a soup for you. I dont know
where she went though. She might be gossiping with Aunt Daeng at the
papaya salad place. She tells me as she collects a used towel that (one of)
our family members had left on the sofa (most likely me, heh heh).
Let me go put these in the wash first then Ill come back and make
something for you, nong Noh.
Thats okay, thats okay. Ill make something myself. How do you make this
thingy? I quickly reply since I dont want to give her any more work to do
and I also think that the sickly dude upstairs should have something lighter
than fried marinated pork.
I grab the Knorr instant porridge pack, flipping it back and forth while looking
interested.
You can just add that to the pot, pour some water and let it cook for about 4
minutes until the rice puffs up. Then its done. That sounds simple enough.
Ill just make this thingy.
Thanks, pAnn. You should go finish with what you were going to do, I can
handle this on my own. I tell her with a smile so that she would believe me.
Lets just agree that Ill try not to burn the kitchen down.

I can hear the sounds of boiling soup as the rice puffs up just like pAnn told
me. I use a large spoon to stir while thinking about what else I should add to
this.
I walk over to grab an egg from the fridge. I hesitantly crack it, Ive never
done this in my entire life!
The egg did get on my hand, but it still in one piece. Im still doing a lot
better than Om. Whenever that bastard tries to show off cracking eggs, they
end up all scrambled without even trying. Maybe I do have a hidden gift
when it comes to cooking? I should try to become a chef. Did someone just
call me out again? That Im bragging after cracking an egg without making a
mess?
At the very least, Im gaining some confidence since I didnt screw this up. I
roll up some ground pork into small balls and drop them into the pot the
same way Ive seen PAnn has done in the past. Wow, this looks really good.
Maybe I should eat this myself. Wait, no, no. That dude is still sick. He should
eat this, Ill just wait for the fried marinated pork and soup instead. Haha,
thatd be much more satisfying.
I keep stirring until (I assume) the pork is cooked so I turn off the stove and
pour what I made into a bowl that I had prepared earlier. I sprinkle some
cilantro on top How pretty! Who made this? Even Chef McDang would be
impressed!
I grin to myself while appreciating my handiwork before I walk over to pAnn,
who is standing near the washing machine, so I can show off. (But she
doesnt seem to be impressed at all! Why not?! This is my best work!) Its too
bad that pIm is not around so I couldnt show off to her. I could walk over to
the papaya salad stall, but its so hot out there. As for Ma and Pa, they are at
the factory. Maybe I should take a photo?
I should just show this off to Phun.
***
Bang! Bang! Bang! Boom! Bang! Bang! Boom!
What the hell?! The first thing I see the second I kick my door in is the sick
patient playing a video game.
Bastard, youre not sick anymore? I cant help but call him names. This jerk
is still sitting there focusing on the 29 inch screen TV and doesnt even
bother to turn around to look at me.

I got bored doing nothing. You called me out for being fancy since I own an
Xbox 360, but you got a PS3? This is even better than what I have and you
never invited me to play this with you either. He tells me as he shoots down
monsters. At this point, I just want to pour this hot porridge on his head.
You never asked. So do you wanna eat this or not? I put a lot of effort in this,
maybe I should throw this out. He quickly turns around without pausing the
game. Haha, he got hit by that monster twice. Serves him right.
But it seems like he doesnt really care about the game anymore. He lets go
of the controller before rushing over to check the bowl in my hand. Aha.
Looks appetizing, isnt it?
You made this yourself?!
Of course! I proudly boast my accomplishment before I put the tray on the
small table near the TV and the game console. Eat up. If it doesnt taste
good then you can add some Maggi and season it yourself.
He seems a little too amazed by this whole thing since he quickly grabs the
spoon and shoved the porridge into his mouth. Oh, this dumbass. Its hot!
Does he think hes eating shaved ice? Hes smart about everything else but
hes a moron when it comes to eating a bowl of hot porridge. -_- Im over it.
He complains, but he eats another spoonful (but hes being smarter this time
around and blows on it first.) before he puts the spoon down and drinks the
water that I also brought for him. Jeez, instant porridge? I thought you
actually spent the time cooking down the rice. I was actually touched.
Damn, youre so greedy. This took a lot of efforts, you know! Theres an egg
and ground pork. I even sprinkled some cilantro on top, see? Its obvious
how proud I am of this.
Yeah, I can see that. Thanks a lot, its pretty good. He tells me its good but
I see him putting Maggi sauce into the bowl. Isnt he so damn honest with
me?
I didnt watch him eat for too long though, (I didnt wanna get hungry) I only
did for a bit then I went to pick up the game from where Phun left off. Nice
choice though, he was playing Devil May Cry 4. Ive been playing this game
for the over 2 months and I still havent beaten it. I wonder if its due to
laziness or it might be cause I just suck at it.
Just as I am reaching for the controller, I hear his voice.

Youre not gonna eat, Noh?

Nah. I start mashing buttons.
Arent you hungry?
A little, but I can wait until this afternoon. Im not on a diet or anything. Im
just waiting for pIm to make me food, hehehe.
Phun goes quiet. By the time I realize it, he is already sitting next to me with
the bowl of porridge.
I shoot a small glance his way but Im not paying much attention to him
since my focus is on the game. It wasnt until a spoonful of porridge touches
my lips that I realized what was going on.
Eh?! What?!
Lets eat together. Theres too much for me to finish by myself.
Thats not too much at all.
Come on. He keeps nagging me so I cant help but open my mouth to
accept the spoonful of porridge. (I am actually pretty hungry anyway.) Wow,
my instant porridge is pretty good.
We spent a long while finishing up the porridge and playing the game
(although it was just me playing the game) in silence. Phun would take a
spoonful, then he would feed me one. Eventually, the amount of porridge in
the bowl dwindles.
Its only normal that I make a mess since I was eating while keeping my
attention on the game. I keep trying to lick the porridge that is left around
my mouth but I just cant get it.
Phun probably sees how pitiful my attempts to clean myself are so he starts
laughing before he wipes away the mess with the tip of his finger.
I turn around to thank him (this tiny distraction cant ruin my gaming, Im too
good) but I end up with his face just a few inches away from mine. I let out a
surprise yelp before I quickly move my face away. Fucking hell! You scared
me!
But he isnt yelling at me in return. I see Phun slowly putting the bowl down
before he decides to move in closer to me. Hes so close that I can see the
little details on his face.

My mouth wants to yell out some more profanities at him but it feels as if his
onyx eyes are hypnotizing me and preventing me from moving. My heart
beats faster and faster. My head is filled with a messy mixture of curiosities
and the intense desires to understand.
The loud noises in my room suddenly disappear, I am blocking everything
else that is going on around me.
Phuns face moves in closer. His yellowish pale face is turning red despite the
fact that he no longer has a fever.
I can feel his orange lips nearly grazing my own. Our nose is already
touching.
My eyelids feel heavy and I slowly let them fall.
But then I snap out of this haze.
What are we doing?!
During my confusion, I shove Phun away with so much force that he falls
backward. It seems he is just as in shock as I am with what was happening.
We sit there staring at each other while being completely alarmed for a few
moments before I turn my face away.
Imgonna get your medicine. Wouldnt want you to get sick again.
Right now, I no longer care to search for the answer as to why my heart is
practically beating out of my chest.

CHAPTER 13: I CANT SEE YOUR EYES

I showed up to school on Monday looking worse for wear.
Ive tried not to think about what happened on Saturday, but my brain
betrayed me. Because no matter what I decided to do, be it sitting, standing,
sleeping, watching a soccer match, playing a video game, or even taking a
small step inside my bedroom
all I could see in my head was Phuns face moving closer to mine. Those
captivating eyes of his. They are the very same loving eyes full of warmth
that he has shown to everyone around him which Ive grown accustomed to.
But now, I simply could not avert my gaze from them. It felt as if Phun had so
much he wanted to say when I looked into his eyes. I couldnt let go of these
feelings. Im too confused to just let go and move on with my life.
After I shoved Phun away and ran off to get his medicine, I couldnt deny that
my entire body was shaking. What I was experiencing was a new kind of
feeling that has never happened to me before. Ive never felt this way with
anybody in my life. Not even with Om, who is my best friend. Even when our
skins happened to make contact, it never felt like this. Not even with Yuri,
who usually hangs on to me so very often. Even she had never made me felt
what I was feeling.
It was a strange feeling, because I was basically swooning yet terrified at the
same time. I was full of curiosity and I was desperate to find out what might
happen next. But something inside me shouted that it wouldnt be possible.
Truth be told, I have never allowed anyone to get close to me at all in the
first place.
After what happened, the only thing that existed between Phun and I were
silence. It was as if we were so deep inside our own thoughts. Phun looked
like he had a lot of things to think about. Meanwhile, I was too confused, I
couldnt even make small talks with him.
A full day went by and we barely said a handful of words to one another. By
nightfall, Phun has fully recovered so I drove my bike and dropped him off at
his house.
We still havent spoken or saw each other since. Its strange how weightless I
feel in my chest when hes not around. To think, it has been only 4 days since
this entire thing started between him and me.

It has been such an unbelievably long 4 days. Its astonishing how we were
able to create all those experiences in such a short amount time. Weve gone
from being barely acquaintances to really close friends. Its true that us guys
make friends very easily and we tend to go with the flow, but there has never
been anyone who can make me trust them so much and so fast like Phun.
So much that I
Yo! Why the hell are you daydreaming already?! Oms extremely loud and
incredibly close voice interrupted my thoughts. This bastard is so annoying,
damn it.
I try not to pay attention to him and put my head down on the table so I can
pretend to take nap. However, he is onto me and grabs my neck so Id pull
my head back up. Dont fall asleep yet! Where have you been on Friday,
Saturday and Sunday? All those three days?
He shoots a bunch of difficult questions my way. What am I supposed to tell
him?!
Wwhy?
Your girlfriend was going crazy trying to get in touch with you. You fucking
turned your phone off for three days. Im starting to lose focus on what Om
is saying because Im too busy trying to come up with an explanation that
would not get Phun or I in trouble. On Friday and Saturday, I turned off my
phone because I didnt want anyone to disturb Phun (since it couldve made
his condition worse and I really didnt wanna keep making food for him). But I
turned my phone off on Sunday because
I honestly dont know what say.
It seems Om realizes that he would never get an answer out of me no matter
how much he keeps pestering because he lets out a long sigh. For real, is
there something going on between you and Phun?
WHAT?! Fuck! I dont know about anyone else if they were in my situation,
but for me I just had to let out a loud noise. Im being so loud that my
classmates turn around and stare at me. Om grabs me and puts his stupidly
salty hand over my mouth. Bastard! What the fuck were you yelling for?!
I wrestle my way out from him a couple of times before he lets go and we get
back to our conversation. I mean, did something happen with him and you?
Phuns girlfriend couldnt reach him in the past three days either.
..

Om and I have been friends for years. Its only natural for him to understand
what my silence really means.
Its cool, you dont have to tell me if you dont wanna. Just think things
through if youre gonna do something. Here are you notes from Friday. Keng
and I wrote them down for you. He calmly tells me as he passes a thin
notebook to me. I realize that Om isnt telling me this because he knows all
the details, but at any rate, I dont have the courage to look him in the eyes.
Thanks, man. I tell him after I accept the notebook. Om pats my shoulder a
couple of times as if he wants to give me some moral supports.
This friend of yours is fine. Hes okay.
***
Today is still another one of my nonsense days. I actually dont lead my lead
in a meaningful way in the first place. Im already in the 11th grade, I wonder
if Ill pass my university entrance exam like this.
Even so, I still dont take things very seriously. If I were, then I wouldnt be
ditching my afternoon classes to lay around at the back of our school
building with Om like this. But anyway, why is it that this dude is always
stuck to my ass as if hes a dung beetle trying to feed himself?
I glance over to see the dung beetle using an iPod case to cover his eyes
while he listens to music. I dont really mean it when I complain about him. I
know that Id be really sad if hes no longer around. Speaking of which, its
really nice and cool on this patch of grass. I guess this is a perfect spot since
its under the buildings shade so I can roll around to my hearts content.
Yawn~ I feel so lazy. Should we just stay here until schools over?
Yeah, lets do that. This jerk would never bother with trying to lead me
down the right path.
Okay then. Not that I try to convince him otherwise anyway, ha.
We both lay there in silence behind the administrative building. In reality, if
one of the Brothers opens a window, then he would definitely catch us. (And
Pa would scold me until my ears go numb.) But theres nothing I can do
about that. If we go back to class, wed get yelled at either way.
I look way up into the blue sky filled with clouds that are drifting in front and
back of one another. They remind me of a theater performance. Depending
on my imagination, Id see the clouds lump to together, then separate, and

sometimes they would make a clear path. I still havent seen a single bird fly
by though. I guess its too hot today that even birds dont want to move
about. Everything is motionless, in a complete unison. There isnt even any
breeze blowing leaves from the trees.
I dont feel like moving anywhere myself when I started thinking about what
has been going on since this morning.
What the hell is up with Phun? Its been bothering me ever since he went
radio silence since Saturday. But I figured that things would go back to
normal when we get to school on Monday. I was dead wrong.
It was obvious to me how things have changed today. To be honest, I cant
actually recall how we acted towards one another before we got to spend
time together. (I vaguely remember us smiling at one another, saying hello
to be polite or ask for small favors.) Those stuff in the parentheses occurred
before 4 days ago. So whydoes it seem like things have gotten worse
between us even though it felt like we have gotten so much closer in the
past 4 days?
I got to school in a completely daze this morning. (As a bonus, I got here
late.) I usually run into Phun since that guy works for the student council. He
normally hangs out there and does his things around the administrative
building, which is near the schools entrance so Id always see him in the
morning.
Often times, I would give him a wave to encourage him. I was hesitant
whether I should do that this morning, but I really wanted things to be
normal.
But that jerk totally gave me the cold shoulder. He didnt smile and wave
back like he usually does. What the heck was that all about?
I have admit that I got pretty annoyed, but I tried not to get so easily upset
like girls would. I told myself that he probably didnt see me. But deep inside,
I knew for a fact that our eyes met before he quickly turned away. However, I
reminded myself that there was no reason for Phun to have acted in such a
way.
That is until 3rd period arrived and we needed to move from our homeroom
to the language lab. Phun and I actually dont happen to run into each other
between classes very often. And its not strange for us to completely walk
past one another without any acknowledgement from either sides. (He and I
werent close back then.) Its just that todaythings felt weird.

Phun is known for his friendliness. (Its totally not strange if you and him
happen to be acquaintances. I wouldnt be surprised if he ends up becoming
a politician after he graduates.) And like always, I saw him smiling widely and
laughing with his friends from afar. He even waved to a bunch of my
classmates. He also joked around with Rodkeng by smacking each others
head.
But then he saw me. Imagine along to this scene. You see a happy-go-lucky
guy smiling as he makes his way towards you. But then he sees you
What am I to him exactly? Why did his face go entirely expressionless?
Before this, I wouldnt even give a damn and Id probably call him out for
being stuck up. But not today.
I had no idea what made me turn around and grabbed his arm. I even
surprised myself, and so was Phun. He seemed pretty startled while I was
trying to bury all the resentments I had and I finally said something out loud.
Hi!
However, what I got in return was the owner of that arm trying to break free
from my grasp. His eyes, which are usually filled with tenderness, were
instead slowly moving downward to the floor.
Hi
That was the only word Ive heard from Phun today.
I did see him here and there during our lunch break. But I realized by then
that he didnt really want to see me so it was time for me to start avoiding
him.
I didnt want a chance for him to run into me. Because if he chose to
intentionally avoid me again
I probably wouldnt have been able to keep holding on to that fake smile.
A long sigh comes out of me as I keep revisiting the things that has
happened. Fortunately, there are some cool breezes passing through now.
They help with my stress somewhat.
What the hell is matter with Phun? Why is he acting like this all of a sudden?
If hes embarrassed, then shouldnt I be the one who is more embarrassed?
And what if I keep making the first move and he keeps running away like
this?

I really dont want to think about this anymore.

I close my eyes and allow the wind to move past my face. At the very least, it
feels like nature is being kind enough to console me. I love the feeling of this
cool breeze blowing on the tip of my nose. It reminds me of that feeling from
the other day.
That gentle feeling of Phuns breath on my nose which is still stuck with me.
I catch myself breaking into a smile uncontrollably when I think about these
past 4 days. So even though those wonderful moments had passed and
wont return, I can still get so much joy by just thinking about them.
The slow and steady breeze continues all around me. Im feeling a bit colder
now, but Im too comfortable in this spot that I dont want to move.
Splash!
Holy shit! Do I look like a toilet?! Dont just dump water on me!
I flinch so hard and snap to reality thanks to the freezing water. Om has
already escaped to a different planet. (Probably because he was afraid of
getting his iPod wet.) What a lovely friend. So who has the audacity to ruin
this relaxing moment of mine?! Better not let me find out! If it isnt one of
the Brothers, then you are so dead!
I complain in my head as I drag my drenched body up to see the culprit. I
turn around with a menacing look in my eyes to see the person responsible
still holding the bucket in this hands. This is how I learned that the culprit
isnt a Brother but
Noh
Phun?

CHAPTER 14: ??
I cant believe you fucking did this. Youre still mad at me for what I did
when we were washing my bike, arent you? I grumble at him as I wring the
water out of my soaked shirt. Even though the weather is hot, Im feeling
pretty cold since Im drenched in water. In the end, I had no choice but to
take off my shirt and allow it to dry.
And who the hell asked you to sleep in that spot? How on earth was I
supposed to know some jerk would be there? There is no such thing as a
compromise with this troublemaker. His retorts are never-ending. Still, he
hands me a towel from the student council office.
Was that dirty mop water?
What? No! It was distilled water. I was changing the water and they were at
the bottom so I wanted to throw it out.
I really hope hes telling the truth. I accept the small towel from him and
hastily pat myself dry. I intend to allow my topless body to dry naturally by
letting the A/C in the student council office do all the work. Meanwhile, Om
had already fled back to class. But before he left, he did give me a long
lecture about how I chose a bad spot and Im the reason he couldnt enjoy
ditching classes. So Im the one in the responsible for all this somehow?
As I continue to complain about Om inside my head, I can feel a large towel
being thrown my way. Use that to cover yourself. Phun tells me.
I hold it up, still puzzled. I can just use this one, its enough for me.
Use that one too. Use itand cover yourself. What the hell is he on about?
Why do I need to cover myself up?
It seems he can read me from the befuddled looks in my eyes. You might
get cold. Oh, I see. I nod before I throw the towel over my shoulders and go
back to drying my hair. Fortunately, my pants didnt get wet otherwise it
wouldve sucked.
As time passes by, there is only the sound of the A/C filling the office. Its
starting to get awkward.
Arent you supposed to be in class? I decide to be the one breaking the
silence.
Im waiting until after youre all dry first.

Did your fever come back?

No
So why have you been ignoring me today?

That question wasnt something I let slip from my lips by accident. I really
wanted to ask him. I stare into his eyes. I want him to know that it isnt like
this situation hasnt been gnawing at me.
Phun glances my way for a moment before he turns around to pick up a
notebook on a desk.
can you lock up after youre done? I should get to class. This is his
answer.
Hes telling me that he no longer wants someone like me as a friend.
***
In reality, most of other high school kids probably love to spend their time
doing this after school. Im just not one of them. I get paranoid whether
someone would call me and invite me somewhere.
They say the more youre afraid of something, the more youre likely to run
into them. So is Yuri a real person or a ghost? Whenever I get a chill down my
spine, thats the day she calls me to go somewhere together.
Im back at Siam again today, with Yuri holding on to my arm this time
around. Shes still chatting away happily as if shes in a competition with the
music that is playing in the store. However, none of those noises are getting
through to me at all.
Im still thinking about what Phun said and the way he acted, which has been
bothering me all day long. Im doing this even though I know no good can
come from it.
Noh, dont you think this is cute? I wish itd come in pink, but orange is still
pretty. Should we buy these two? You can have the blue one. Noh? Noh?
Noh?! The last loud noise, which mentions my name, finally snaps me out of
my trance. I actually didnt hear a single thing Yuri was saying to me. I only
heard her when she called my name the third time.

Yyes?
My clear lack of interest causes the girl who called my name to puff up her
cheeks, revealing her unhappiness. But then it turns into a smile. Ill get the
orange and you get the blue, okay?
Oh, sure. How much are they? I try to give the person who has never really
has gotten upset with me a smile. I reach for my wallet intending to pay, just
like any other good boyfriends would do.
Ill pay for them. Im buying this for you, Noh.
Thats okay. You can pay when we buy more expensive stuff. Ill pay for the
cheaper stuff myself. I tell her jokingly, but these idiotic looking keychains
from Loft arent exactly on the cheaper side.
Yuri laughs, Sure! She gives me a delighted smile before she takes me to
pay at the counter.
After we receive our keychains which are in a yellow bag from Loft, Yuri
immediately puts them on our school bags. I stand there in amazement as I
watch her focusing all her energy on hooking up these keychains. After a
short moment, she looks up at me with smile and shows off her handiwork.
Dont lose this, okay?
Yeah.
We walk arm in arm around the department store for a while before Yuri
complains that she is hungry. She playfully begs me to walk from Siam
Discovery to Siam Center so we can find something to eat. And like always, I
never decline her requests.
We chat along the way until we arrive at a bookstore between the walkway.
Yuri stops in her track and waves at someone.
Its Aim and Phun?!
For years and years, I would never run into these two by chance. I dont
know how we keep running into each other as of late.
Lets go say hi! Yuri doesnt wait for an answer and she starts half dragging
and half pulling me inside the bookstore. She ignores the fact that Im trying
hard not to budge. I dont think we should bother them Shes still ignoring
me.

Aw, what a coincidence. I saw you rushing out of the school, I just knew you
made plans with Noh. Aim tells her friend in jest the moment Yuri and I get
there. Phun is standing there staring at a magazine in silence. I dont really
know what to say either.
Only once in a while. The girl next to me grins widely before she grabs the
two school bags that I was holding to show off to her friend.
Look, look, look! Arent these so cute? Noh bought them for me just now.
Theyre so cute! Phun, will you buy one for us too? This disease where girls
need to one up each other is probably an epidemic. The second Aim sees the
keychains (which I find to be completely idiotic) on our school bags, she tugs
on Phuns sleeve while he is still reading the magazine right away.
This forces Phun to look up curiously. Hm?
Those sharp eyes pauses at the keychains for a moment before he looks up
for a split second and turns to Aim with a smile. Oh, sure.
Lets buy a couple one just like Yu and Noh?
Yes.
Wah! Copycats! So what are you guys reading anyway? Yuri interrupts the
conversation between Aim and Phun before she gives herself permission to
turn the magazine cover over. Eh?! What is this?! Wedding Plan magazine?!
You two havent even finished high school yet! This causes me to quickly
turn my head and look.
Phun pretends to look away so he doesnt need to meet my eyes before he
picks up a different magazine to flip through. (Now he has a magazine
featuring Formula 1 in his hands.) Theres a soft chuckle coming from Aim.
Just flipping through them cause I thought the dresses looked pretty.
Jeez, arent you two in such a rush? Noh, should we look through some too?
Yuri asks me in a high pitch voice before she turns to face me which startles
me.
Areare you sure thats a good idea?
Hahahaha. Aim breaks out in laughter after she hears my reply. Yuris
cheeks are puffing up again.
You couldve went along with the joke, Noh. Im so sad now. How was I
supposed to know she was joking?! We may have agreed to be a couple in a

blur, we make plans to go on a date in a blur, but theres nothing blurry

about getting married. I can think for myself too, you know. -_- Yuri hits me
twice on my arm as a punishment.
We wont bug you now, were gonna go grab something to eat. See you at
school tomorrow, okay? We decide to leave after we had our chat. Yuri
waves goodbye at the two, which are still holding magazines in their hands. I
decide to wave too and follow Yuri to the exit.
I wouldve gotten there if someone hadnt grabbed my arm.
I flinch a bit as I turn to see the hand that I recognize very well. That hand is
slowly moving down and intertwine its fingers with mine. What is he doing?! I
stare at that hand and then at Phuns face. Phuns girlfriend seems to be
oblivious to what is going on.
A small smile curls from his lips just for a short moment. He squeezes my
hand tight before he lets go.
I dont understand what Phun is trying to tell me.

CHAPTER 15: WITHOUT TURNING BACK

My head is strangely empty by the time I arrive at my house. During the day,
I had so many things to think about. But now? Everything that was bothering
has decided to merge into a white round ball which is now floating away
inside my head in the blink of an eye.
Im probably stressing out at my limits now. If I let this continues, Id
definitely end up insane. I roll back and forth on my bed before I crawl over
to grab a new game to play so I could relieve some of my stress. Its too bad
that Im not in the mood to play it at all.
Fucking Phun. I curse at him despite the fact that he isnt even in front of
me. I get some satisfactions from that though. Cursing him out is actually
helping.
Fucking Phun! Asshole! Weirdo! Pervert! Youre a player! Youre a stupid
manwhore! Youyouyou! What else should I say?! I think to myself while
being completely annoyed. I kick a body pillow that is laying on the floor. It
flies up to the other side of the room.
Goddamn it I really dont know what else I could call him. I pace back and
forth, muttering to myself as if Ive been backed into a corner with nowhere
else to go. But then, I finally come up with an idea.
Bang! Bang! Bang! Bang!
Noh! Where are you going?! Careful going down those steps!
Im gonna go to my friends house, Ill be back soon! I yell back a reply to
Ma before I get on my bike and leave.
***
So here I am at this huge mansion once again. I park my bike in front of the
Phumipat Resident and look up to the second story. I can see that the lights
in Phuns room are on, that means he has already made it home.
At any rate, what is it that I came here to do? What am I going to say to him?
How will we clear up this situation anyway? I honestly dont know. I only
know that we really need to have a conversation about something.
The street in front of the Phumipat Resident has turned into my personal
workout area since I keep pacing back and forth so much that I am getting
dizzy. Im still not sure whether I should go inside. But then a huge car drives
up to the gate and I hear someone calling my name from the backseat with
the window rolled down. PNoh?
Nong Pang?!
Are you here to see pPhun? Talk about embarrassing. I suddenly feel like
one of that gay guys who are overly attached to their boyfriend.
But she seems to be enjoying this. -_-
Why dont you head inside? See that? I give her a wry smile. Phuns sister
proceeds to click on the remote to open the large gate. She also lets me
bring my bike inside to park next to the beautiful European car in the garage.
Do you usually get home this late? I start a small talk to be polite as she
steps out of the car. I can see that shes still wearing her school uniform.

Well, so am I. But Im wearing a pair of flip flops instead of the regular pair of
shoes.
I had a tutoring session. PPhun is home, isnt he? Why dont you go upstairs
and see him? She tells me after she had already looked up to see the lights
from Phuns room.
PNoh, are you and pPhun fighting? Oh! She hits the jackpot with that
question! How are your senses this good?! I forget to take another step
forward when I heard the cheerful voice asking that question.
How am I supposed to answer her? Uhnot really. Actually, I dont really
know, heh. Does that even sound remotely like an answer? -_-
What makes you think that, nong Pang?
Well, ever since he got home from your place on Saturday, he seems really
depressed and hasnt been eating much. PNoh, please dont be mad at him.
Sometimes he can be so stupid and get upset easily, but he really does love
you. (Listen to her talking trash about her brother.) Who is mad at whom
here? And wait, Phun loves me?!
I must have curiosity written all over my face since Pang continues talking
without me having asked any questions.
PPhun laughs a lot louder ever since you came into his life. Sure, I see a
bunch of girls shrieking and screaming for him, but he has never brought
anyone home to meet me before. PPhun really does love you, pNoh. I can
tell.
I give her a despondent smile as a reply, I know too well that those words are
all lies.
Phun would never love someone like me, Pang.
***
Pang and I went our separate ways and I am now standing in front of a large
wooden door. I wonder whether I should knock like a proper person would or
kick the damn door down and start cursing at the owner of this room. (I
prefer the latter.) I thought of a lot of other ways, but theres only one way to
do this.
I decide to knock on his door, but dont think that hell be able to see me
through the peephole. I am already hiding in its blind spot. Its not that Im
trying to surprise him. Im afraid that he wont open the door if he sees me
standing here.
I slide my way in the second the door is slightly ajar.
Noh?! Good. Surprise attack.
You didnt need to pretend like youre a ninja. Whats up?
I suddenly get super annoyed when I hear those words from Phun. Who was
it that has been avoiding me and forced me to pretend to be a ninja? I furrow
my brows and I look at him. Hes still wearing our school uniform. I guess he
just got home as well.
Did you have dinner yet? He asks me as he walks over to the mini fridge.
He passes me a can of coke. Oh, but you ate with Yuri already. I forgot.
And you already ate with Aim. Do you have any beer? I dont want this. He
gives me a puzzled look but then he tosses what I asked for over to me.

I catch the can and I lazily lean down half way on the sofa. Phun walks over
and sits next to me with a can of beer in his hand as well.
We sit in silence as we watch whatever is airing on Cartoon Network that
Phun had left playing. Neither of us are saying a word. I can tell that Phun
isnt really paying attention to the TV and is lost in this thoughts. Just like
him, Im not focusing on Tom & Jerry at all.
Hm I let out a long sigh as I lean back on the sofa while I lift my neck up.
Whats the matter? Phun finally says something.
What the hell are you watching? This is so retarded.
What the? Take the remote control and change to whatever you wanna
watch then. He puts the remote on my lap. In reality, I didnt come here to
watch TV with him. But I dont think I can bring myself to start the
conversation in this moment.
I flip through the channels and leave it on channel 55 for a bit.
Oh, so you called me out earlier and now youre watching Winnie the Pooh?
Whatever, I wanna be Tigger.
The tiger?
Ya, isnt he cool?
But Tigger is a retarded tiger. Phuns protest causes me to furrow my
brows.
Whatever, jeez. This concludes our conversation as to what is retarded and
what isnt. I watch Tigger jumps into a pond so he can play a game with
Pooh. I cant help but be reminded of what happened this afternoon.
You got me all wet today. My complaints seem to make Phun break out into
a smile. He laughs for a bit before he looks at my face. Who asked you to
sleep in that spot, Noh?
No one did butbecause of you I answer him but my eyes are still
directed towards the TV, although Im not paying attention to it at all. With
the help of alcohol in my system, I find it easier for me to start talking. It
was your fault I repeat for him to hear.
What did I do?
You gave me the cold shoulder all day. I was so pissed so I ditched my
classes to take a nap behind that building. And can you stop speaking
formally to me already?! What the hell is up with you? To me, it feels like he
is trying to hide something by being polite. It infuriated me so much that I
shouted and turned the TV off.
.
We stay quiet for a long while. There are only the sounds of beer being
gulped down nonstop. I begin to wonder if I should just get myself drunk and
pass out at this point.
IDo you realize how much I loved Aim? Phun suddenly asks me out of
the blue. It feels as if a thousand knives are embedded in the center of my
heart.
How should I know? Thats your business.
No matter what Aim has done, Ive always forgiven her. Be it when she
gives me attitude, wanting things done her way or when she forces me to do

something I dont want to do. I had always thought that Id give in to her
demands with just about everything.
.
But then last Wednesday came along, the day you came to me and asked
for helpand until tonight
.
things have been weird for me.
Ive had it with Phun trying to beat around the bush. What the hell are you
trying to say? What do you mean by weird? Sorry, Im failing English. I
stare at his face as he takes in a deep breath. Then he proceeds to say the
following sentences without looking at me even once.
Nohcan you just fucking let me be on my own like this for a while? I cant
stand myself for wanting to see you. I was being so fucking shameless when I
tried to kiss you. I mean, I dont even know how these feelings came about
or when they started happening to me. By the time I realized it, the only
person I want by my side is you. Every time that you came to help me and
took care of me, I kept thinking to myself that I wish I was the fucking person
who was taking care of you instead. Im a fucking asshole because I cant
even be honest with you. And even when we were alone together, I had to
keep forcing myself not to touch you. Do you realize that it only gets more
and more difficult as time goes by? Can we just stay away from each other
for a while? I can barely keep myself under control right now.
Phun finishes telling me all this. It feels as if he has been keeping this buried
inside him for so long. There isnt anything else I can do but sit still. Every
single word entered my left ear but they did not leave my right ear. I have to
admit that this is beyond what I expected to happen.
I can tell by the way Phun is keeping his eyes tightly shut that he is intensely
contemplating everything that is going on. He places his sweaty palms on his
forehead.
My head is now empty. It feels like someone has lifted a mountain from my
chest. Its really hard to explain what I am feeling right now. But there are
things Im still not sure about.
Why are youforcing yourself not to touch me?
Phun shakes his head, his eyes are still tightly shut.
Because the friendship that you are giving to me is too damn valuable for
me to betray you. Because youre a guy, and so am I. Because you have Yuri,
just like how I have Aim. Because what I think about might make you hate
me so much that you probably dont want to be friends with me ever again.
Do you fucking understand that there are these reasons telling me that I
cant be doing this? That Im doing everything wrong. And III really dont
know what to do anymore. This is the first time I have ever seen a capable
guy like Phun with his back against the wall. His voice is trembling as he
continues to speak.
Idont want make things worse than they already are. Those words
devastated me. Phuns face is full of despair. Its letting me know how weak
and fragile he is. It emphasizes the fact that the guy I see in front of me isnt

Phun Phumipat that everyone supposedly knows. Hes not this great student
council secretary from our school.
This guy right here is Phun. Just Phun. A boy who is trying to process all this
feelings. And it seems like it wont make it through this.
I cant help but glance at the left side of Phuns distorted but alluring face. I
dont know what inspired me to grab a hold of that hand, hoping to pass
along some of my strengths to him.
If we ignore all those reasons, if we stop thinking about who were supposed
to be, or what is considered to be the right thing to do I try to search for
the truth from those eyes filled with questions and confusions.
what is it that you want to do?
Phun takes a moment to stare back into my eyes before he reaches over and
pulls me in. His face and its sharp features are moving closer to mine. I begin
to feel the things I felt the other day once again.
His light orange lips press up against mine before he whispers something
back to me.
I want you, Noh.
If we choose to let this moment continues without having to worry about the
consequences which we may face in the future, would that be possible?

CHAPTER 16: AINT ONLY US

Im allowing the other party to do as he desires, but it isnt only his but my
own desires too. I stop caring about all the reasons, and all the
consequences.
Phuns kiss is a fearful but an emotional one, just like how he is embracing
me. The two of us let our bodies do what our hearts are craving for. Were at
a point where we can no longer keep these feelings inside. Theres no
stopping us.
..
..
..
Im not sure how long the time has passed when I finally open my eyes to the
darken room. Ive come to my senses once again. Phun is holding me tightly
as he sleeps. Phun, this friend that has caused so much turmoils inside my
head over the past few days.
I can see his sleeping face thanks to the moonlight that is shining through.
His long lashes are caressing his cheeks, his eyelids are hiding the eyes
which were burning me up merely a few hours ago.
I can tell by the his stable breathing from his nose right above his natural
colored lips, that the person holding me is in a deep slumber.
I stare at his face with mixed emotions. But the one feeling that is standing
out to me the most is fear.
The pain which I can still feel is reminding me that we have made an
unforgivable mistake. I was the one who told him to ignore all the reasons, to
stop thinking about what the right things might be, and that we should forget
who were supposed to be. But after a few hours, I begin to realize that those
things I mentioned simply cant be done.
The things that have been haunting Phun are now haunting me as if I had
read a chain letter. Im facing the reality of what Phun said to me, the reality
of which I cannot escape. Phun and I are both guys. We each have a
girlfriend of our own. And more importantly, we are good friends and I do not
want to destroy the relationship that we have between us.
Personally, I dont know what kind of feelings I have for Phun. Phun himself
doesnt know what kind of feelings he is giving to me either. I dont dare to
think back to how all of this started.
Im scared that this only happened out of lust.
But theres something else that Im even more afraid of.
Im scared that it might be more than just lust. More than a simple
attachment we have for one another. More than just a mistake that we
accidentally made. Im scared that this means more than all those things.
Because if my heart takes that step over the edge, I dont know how Ill be
able to deal with that. I honestly dont.

OhNoh? Youre not asleep? Fortunately, Phuns voice interrupts my train

of thoughts. Hes yawning so wide that I need to move away a bit since I
start to feel really hot.
But Phun only gives me a tiny bit of space between his arms. It seems he
wants to keep holding me like this. Damn it, its hot.
What? Then Ill turn the A/C up. What a smartass. He reaches over to grab
the remote control and adjusts the temperature so that he doesnt need to
let go of me. Doesnt he even think about global warming? I shoot him an
annoyed look, but the room is probably too dark for him to see. Phun tenses
his arms and stretches a bit before he pulls me back inside his embrace.
Wanna drop by your house to get the stuff you need for school tomorrow
morning? He mutters a question to me like someone who is too lazy to open
their mouth to speak.
Sure.
Theres a change in my voice which he picks up on. Is something the
matter? He asks me, now fully awake.
Um
Whats up?
Do you think what we did is wrong? Im not sure whether this is a question
or just a statement that Im trying to tell myself. I can see a photo in a frame
by the bed in the dimly lit room. Its a photo of Phun and Aim together.
Phun turns around and flips the frame over before he returns to hold me.
Lets not think about that tonight. We can talk about it tomorrow, okay?
But
No more talking. He shuts me up using his own lips before moving away.
There is only us tonight.
I close my eyes and accept those lips as I embrace Phuns body, which is on
top of me and is pressing up against my own. It is a signal telling me that
were about to do what we did earlier once more.
I tell myself to leave everything behind tonight. And no matter what happens
tomorrow morning, no matter who Phun and I will go back to.
We will never ever forget tonight.
***
The junior high school kids are playing basketball and soccer so loudly that I
almost want to poke my head out the window and yell at them. (I didnt
because I was too lazy.) Normally, I wouldnt be this irritated, but my body
isnt feeling well and there are noisy distractions to boot.
I lay down on the sofa in our club room while twisting a Rubics Cube. This is
that jerk Oms fault. He passed this cube thing for me to play with this
afternoon. School has ended for the day and I had only finished one side of it.
Its so tiring, I wonder how Keng is so good at this. I dont get it.
I keep thinking about this while feeling annoyed. My hips are hurting. I dont
know how to solve the Rubics Cube. Is there anyone else out there whose
life is as fucked up as mine at this point?!
Jeez, you look real stressed out. Are you planning to play with that thing all
day, p? I dont need to look up to know that the smartass comment comes

from Per. However, Im in no mood to argue with him, (Im busy here) so I
mumble a reply letting him know not to bother me.
I was wrong to think this kid would just leave me in peace. He grabs an
electric guitar and plays with it right in front of me without a care in the
world. Its so boring. Our clubs drums are in horrible conditions so no one
wants to play them. Now I dont get to practice.
So what? Cant he see Im fucking busy here?
When will the new set of drums get here, p? Hes so damn persistent! I
stop playing with the Rubics Cube and turn to look at his face. Still waiting
for the money, got it now?
Jeez, but you and pPhun have gotten really close these days though. I
never thought Id hear those words from this dude.
Hold up, howd you know about this?
Everyone already knows! You two are pretty close. Even you guys
girlfriends are friends. Oh, I see. I thought I was going to break down in
laughter.
So what?
Tell pPhun to give the money to us soon then?
What?! Its not that simple! Do you expect me to go to the student council
office and rob them at gunpoint?! I wouldve done that if I could.
Per looks a bit upset after I told him off. I understand that he really wants to
practice, but I honestly dont know how to make this process goes any faster.
I dont think badgering Phun about it often would do any good. I continue to
think while I go back to solving the puzzle in my hands.
Who can be nice at every hour? Im a person, not a character in a drama on
TV.
There! PPhuns calling now! What?! How does he know? I flinch so hard
and quickly grab my phone to check. I almost throw the Rubics Cube and the
phone at Pers head.
Phun my ass. Hey, Yuri. I cursed at Per before I switch to sounding sleepy
when I answer the call. I doubt that Ill ever solve this Rubics Cube so I let it
fall to the floor.
Are you still at school, Noh?
Im in my club room. Whats up, Yuri? Yuri usually doesnt call me around
this time of day. If she wants to invite me to go somewhere, she would
normally call me before schools over so that I can free up my schedules. If
we dont hang out, then shed only call when its late, before we go to sleep.
Imstanding in front of your school. I need to talk to you about something.
Can you come see me for a second? I almost jump up from the sofa and
forget about how much pain Im still in when I hear those words. Theres a
girl standing all alone in front of an all-boy school! How am I not supposed to
be worried about her?!
Hold on, Im running over there. Dont go anywhere, Yuri. I hastily tell her
before hanging up and rush over to put on my shoes near the club rooms
entrance.

Your girlfriend called? Per follows me looking confused. I give him a nod
before I pat him on the shoulder. Take care of the club, Ill be back in a bit.
***
Im half walking and half running with my shoes still not on correctly, and Im
dragging my sore hip along all the way to the schools gate. Yuri is standing
there waiting for me just as instructed. But with her light skin and a cute
face, she cant help but being gawked at by the male students around here.
Im not jealous, its more like Im worried about her safety. -_- An adorable
girl like Yuri getting lost from the herd and ended up in the middle of a bunch
of young guys? It cant be good.
Why didnt you call me ahead of time and tell me youd be dropping by? You
shouldnt do something like this. I scold her lightly when I finally arrive. I
offer to take her school bag and then we leave the school premises.
Im sorry. I was in a hurry and I was on the phone the entire time on my way
to your school. That sounds a bit strange, doesnt it?
Is there something going on?
Nohdo you know whats going on with Phun? I wish I could disappear
right this second.
Yuris round black eyes stare at me as if shes searching for the truth about
something. I actually dont know what it is shes searching for or why shes
being so ambiguous.
What about him?
Sigh What? Why do I get a sigh instead of an answer from her? -_- Im
very confused by the cryptic ways this girl is acting. It seems she wants to
say something, but is unable to find the words.
Did something happen?
Um, Nohdo you know where Phun was last night? Im a bit hesitant to
answer since I know very well what happened last night.
Wwhy?
Ugh, I tried telling Aim that she shouldnt make me come to you about this. I
know that you and Phun are friends, youd help him cover this up. You
wouldnt tell me the truth. At this point, Im so baffled that Im not sure what
to say to her.
Yuri stops making a fuss to herself before she looks up to me. She locks her
eyes with mine which I am unable to avoid.
Please, Noh. Aim is really stressed out about this.
Yuris lips move ever so slowly that I heard and understood every single word
in the following sentence.
Can you tell me who slept with Phun last night?
It felt as if I was struck by lightning when I heard those words.

CHAPTER 17: ESCAPE

Please, Noh. Aim is really stressed out about this. Can you tell me who slept
with Phun last night?
Those words are still spinning inside my head and they are not stopping
anytime soon, not even when I finally got home. Im placing my hand over
my forehead like how Ive seen actors do on television. This doesnt help lift
away the heaviness in my head at all
Lately, you and Phun have been going off the radar a lot. Aim is so stressed
out over this. Im okay though, Im just worried about my friend.
Its okay if you wont tell me whats going on, Noh. But can you please tell
Phun how badly hes hurting Aim? Can you tell him to stop doing this to her?
Phun and Aim are a couple. Why doesnt he go to her instead? Why does he
have to be with some other girls? Who does he think Aim is?
My eyes are closed as if Im trying to escape this reality. But how can I
escape when it isnt even something I can see and run away from? They are
the words that keep repeating loudly inside my head.
The condoms that Phun usually carry in his wallet are missing. NohPhun
and Aim arent like us. Theyve been together in that way. Phun cant treat
women like were his toys like this. I wont allow it.
GODDAMN IT! I swear at myself loudly as I throw the body pillow across the
room. I keep wishing that if I yell loud enough, I wont be able to hear Yuris
voice in my head anymore. Its like someone keeps rewinding the scene over
and over.
Im not angry at Yuri for coming to me about this. Im not angry at Aim, who
is sitting somewhere crying her eyes out. Im not even angry at Phun after
learning that he has that kind of a relationship with Aim.
What I feel is how much I hate myself. Im the reason everything turned out
this way. Im the bastard without any conscience.
Fuck I keep swearing at myself while I blindly wander around my room
grabbing things and shoving them into my black school backpack.
This has to end. No matter what.
***
I wonder if Ive been to this place over 8 times in the past 7 days. I crane my
neck up to look at the huge mansion in front of me. Then, I take a deep
breath before I ring the bell.
Auntie Noi rushes over to let me in. She gives me a gentle smile while she
asks me if she could help me with the backpack. I feel wouldnt be a real
man if I allow this elderly lady to carry my school backpack around so I insist
on carrying it myself. ^^
She gives me a long sigh since I refuse her offer. Then she tells me, Khun
Phun is upstairs in his room, khun Noh. If you dont mind showing yourself in,
then Ill go let khun Pang know that you are here. Eh? Why does Pang needs
to know that Im here, Auntie? -_- Right, I keep forgetting who Im supposed
to be whenever I visit this house.

Im so pathetic. Im fucking up peoples lives over 20,000 baht.

Im dragging the backpack with an insignia embedded on it (I havent used
this bag since the 9th grade) over the beautiful parquet flooring. I stop in
front of a door that Ive grown familiar with. A cool air is leaking through the
gap at the bottom of the door which tells me that the owner of this room is
inside with the A/C blasting away just like I thought.
However, before I get a chance to knock on the door, my phone starts
ringing.
Who can be nice at every hour? Im a person, not a character in a drama on
TV.
This asshole is probably a psychic.
Why are you calling me? Im right in front of your room. Short and easy to
understand. The person on the other line to quickly hangs up before he
swings the door open. Eh?!
The hell are you so startled for? Were you watching porn? I dismiss the
surprise look on Phuns face and walk past him to get inside. I toss the
backpack in a corner of the room before making my way toward the
computer that is still on.
I was only messing with him. He actually has MSN Messenger running on the
screen. When I sit down on the chair, I can see that Aim is typing something.
Aim : Message me when youre on, Yuri says:
Phun, do you still love me?
Those pink letters pierce all the way to my hearts core, but I still force
myself to laugh. I find it funny for Aim to be asking such a weird question. If
Phun doesnt love her, then who else could it possibly be?
I have to admit, Im finding it harder and harder to crack a smile each time.
Aims display picture is a photo of the two of them. They look as if they want
to let the world know how much they love one another. I stare at the display
picture for a moment before I begin to reflect about who I really am. Then I
start typing away on the keyboard to tell Aim something.
SuperPunn says:
Of course.
Hey, Noh! What the hell is this?! Phun yells at me from a corner of the
room which causes me flinch and turn around to look at him as he inspects
the backpack.
Spare clothes for donations. Jeez, what the hell do you think they are? I
cant believe he asked me that question, it isnt like hes blind. I turn my
attention back to the computer. Ive already logged him off and log into my
own account. Was I supposed to ask for permission? Keep on dreaming.
Smack!
Ow! He hit me in the head!
I was asking nicely, why did you have get smart with me? And look, you
already signed out from my email account too? Why did you bring that
backpack here, do you wanna run away with me or something? Personally, I
think hes more of a smart guy than I am. I rub the spot where I got hit,
feeling a bit irked. Yeah, take me somewhere.

You being serious? I cant believe he would be this obedient because the
second I finish talking, he quickly grabs the car keys that were hanging over
the computer desk. I snatch them right out of his hands. Jeez, I was only
joking!
If you wanna go then Ill take you. How about Bang Saen? Its close
enough. Phun ponders over his idea while Im in still awe. I didnt think he
would go along with something like this so easily. Real funny. Brother Sakda
is giving my class a practice exam tomorrow.
However, what I get from Phun in return is a smile. Not just any smile, but he
also raises his brows at me. He proceeds to walk over to grab two sweater
jackets from his closet. Ill make sure you get there in time to take your test
tomorrow. Come on!
He throws my backpack over his shoulder and drags me by my arm. How can
I not cause a scene when this is happening? Hey! Turn off your computer,
the A/C and the lights in your room first! Of course, hes not even listening.
Someone else will take care of that. This demanding guy tells me as he
whistles and leads the way, completely in a good mood. His other hand is
still dragging me by my wrist and it doesnt seem that hell let go. I can see
Phun smiling widely as we make our way down the steps and run into Auntie
Noi who happens to be walking by. Auntie Noi, Im heading out with Noh,
okay?
But before she can answer, a mischievous face appears from behind her.
Where are you going, pPhun?! -_- Its nong Pang. Where did she come
from? (I got scared, I thought she was a ghost) Its so late, why arent you in
bed. (I should discipline you) -_- Even though my relationship with Phun is
now exactly what Pang had hoped to be, Im still not used to this when I need
to face her.
Im taking pNoh out tonight. Ill buy snacks for you on the way back. Phun
tells his little sister while he messes with her head. I wouldve punched him if
he were my brother. (Quit playing with someones head already.) However,
nong Pang is grinning wide. I get scared thinking what kind of idea she has in
mind. -_-
Ah, take a good care of pNoh, okay? You know, you can try stopping your
brother sometimes! We have school tomorrow!
Since there is no one in his way, Phun continues to drag me along while
whistling happily. Hes in an even better mood now. TT___TT
Phun drags me to where his 2-door sports car is parked. He throws one of the
jacket over my shoulders. In case we run into any truancy patrols. He tells
me this because Im still wearing my school uniform, bright blue pants and
all. Fucking hell, you couldve let me change my clothes first.
He laughs at my complaints as he reaches for the door handle so he could
open it for me. Dont think that this Noh would let this happen. (Heh heh) I
reach for the handle first and get inside on my own. I can still hear Phun
chuckling at me (the fuck is he laughing at?) as he gets into the driver seat.
Its your fault. You couldve changed your damn clothes before you came
over to see me.

I go quiet after I heard that sentence.

Hes right, though. I was in such a rush. But for me, I wanted to make the
most out of every single minute tonight.
Phun turns the ignition and looks at me mockingly. Missed me that bad?
. I dont answer him and sit still. Even if I were going to
say something, I wouldnt have gotten a chance to anyway. His strong arm
reaches over my shoulders and he pulls me in.
Phun places his lips on my forehead. Theres enough force behind this action,
it is as if he wants this kiss to help me understand how he really feels about
me. Ive missed you. I didnt get to see you today. You werent at the club
room when I dropped by.
Whend you drop by? I slightly turn my face away from him. Phun still leans
in closer to kiss me on the cheek. This evening. I ran into a 10th grader and
he told me that he was ordered to stay and take care of the room by you.
Oh, thats Per. I look down and give him an answer. I know full well why I
wasnt in the club room. I remember what conversation I had and who I had
it with.
The tip of Phuns nose continues grazing all over me. His lips eventually stop
to where mine are. We stayed like that for a long time until I had to finally
push him off me. So are we going to Bang Saen or what?
Oh, right. Wed never get there if we keep this up. He chuckles to himself
before he releases me and moves back into the drivers seat.
I see that youre walking around like normal, its not hurting anymore?
Phun asks me as he stops at an intersection to Thong Lor Road. I raise my
brows at his question before replying. Im doing better now. Id end up a
cripple if I stay in bed all day. What about you?
Aspirin should help. He tells me. There are low chuckling noises coming
from him, I cant help but laugh along. He grabs my hand and places it over
the gear stick before he begins tracing the back of my palm with his index
finger playfully.
Sothat means we can do it again tonight then? He says this to me in a
cute voice. I dont need to turn and look at him to know what kind of a
perverted expression he has on his face.
I turn to face the window and stare at the orange lights lining up the road on
both sides.
Uh-huh

CHAPTER 18: REMIND

It is true that Phun drives pretty fast, but its almost 10 pm by the time we
get to see the beach in Bang Saen. He and I decide to park the car near a
sidewalk so we can get a late dinner in a restaurant. We choose this
particular one because we see that a lot of students in the area are the
patrons.
Lots of people, I bet the food heres good. This is what my chariot tells me
which causes me to break into a big smile. This means that Im not the only
one who thinks that a crowded restaurant equals to good food.Heh heh. I
should rub this in Oms face once I get back. (He is always calling me a
weirdo every time I tell him this. How am I wrong about this exactly?)
Phun shuts the engine off, then he makes sure Im wearing the jacket
properly before he opens the car door.
For some odd reason, it feels like were making a grand entrance when we
enter the restaurant. All eyes are on us. It might be because of the student
uniform with the schools initials showing, plus the blue shorts that are
making people turn their heads. But if I think about it carefully
The person I am with is too good looking. -_-
Basically, its the combination of the two. One guy is handsome and the
other is wearing a school uniform so we end up standing out. Its only natural
that I tense up when I realize that all these strangers are staring. However,
Phun seems pretty relaxed. I cant tell if he is aware that everybody in this
restaurant is staring at us. -_-
Screw it. Im gonna stop caring. -_-
A hostess finally helps us find a table after Phun and I spin around looking for
one for a long while since we couldnt find any seats. I sit down but Im still
confused whether what kind of place this is. Is it just a restaurant or is it a
bar? I notice that some tables only have drinks on them and there arent any
food. (What the heck?) Im also wondering whether being in this place while
wearing my school uniform is really okay or not.
I find the answer to my question when I see students wearing their uniform
next to our table ordering beers -_-
A loud voice from someone ordering food interrupts my messy train of
thoughts. Well havespicy pork skin salad, spicy minced meat salad, fried
chicken tendons, chili crispy crackers, and a tower of Heineken.Goddamn
him. I thought those dishes sounded odd. I reach over and smack this honor
student on his head. Order me some real food! Fucking hell!
Eh?! You didnt have any dinner yet?
No When was I supposed to find the time to eat? I was too busy talking
to Yuri this evening. I wasnt in the mood to do anything else when I got
home since I was so troubled. Then I ended up packing a bag and went all
the way to Phuns place. At first, I thought I was just gonna spend the night
there. But the owner of that house decided to schlepped me all the way here.
Talk about having good fortune when it comes to traveling.

Order something then. Phun tells me as he passes the menu over despite
the fact that he never actually opened it and looked beforehand.So why the
hell did he keep it all to himself in the first place? I dont get that either. I
scratch my head as I look through the menu for exactly two seconds. Fried
ricethats it.
How creative of you, Noh. This jerk as the nerves to say something. Well,
whose fault is this?
You already ordered us some beer, what the hell am I supposed to order?
They go well together. Thats all, p I pass the menu back to the waitress
with a small smile. That was enough for her to be smitten. Heh, heh.
Sometimes us guys need to put our art of seduction in practice once in a
while.
Whats with the smile? Were you flirting with her? This jerk wants to start
another fight with me.
What the fuck are you talking about? Im starving. Nobody else is always full
and happy like you are.
Exactly. Hmph. He wasnt this much of a smartass when we werent close,
right? Jeez, I shouldnt have let this happen. There is an irksome expression
on my face as I tap on the table with the tip of my fingers along with the
band that is playing in the restaurant.
This restaurant actually has a live band. Theyre playing easy-listening music
like any other small bands would. I count about 5 members in all. I get the
itch to get up and join them on stage. Oh, speaking of playing instruments,
this reminds me of something.
I went to the student council office to drop off the proposal for the
Christmas Festival around noon, but I didnt see you there.
Eh? Its not like Im working as a security guard in that office. It was noon, I
had to go get some lunch! Oh, so basically I just asked a stupid question
then? This is pissing me off. Im in no mood to argue with him, plus Im
already starving.
I give him a dry smile mocking him and force out a laughter, Heh, heh. So is
the food at the convents cafeteria any good, khun Phun? I only meant to
say it as a harmless sarcasm remark. I had no idea Phun would actually be
taken aback by this.
Theyre fine Phun gives me a short reply and goes quiet. I raise of my
brows as I begin to ponder. So Aim mustve found out about what Phun did
when they had lunch together.
I ran into your underclassman at the convent too. That one 10th grader. He
continues to make small talks with me while he reaches over to accept the
our first dish, the spicy pork skin salad, from the waitress. The zesty scent of
the lime kicks me in the nose. Im drowning in my own saliva and I continue
to get hungrier.
I raise my fork intending to stick it in one of the pork skin before I carry on
with the conversation. Oh, Per usually goes there and have lunch with some
of the girls. But since I was too busy talking and Phun was quicker than me,

he snatched the piece of pork that I had my eye on and shoved it in his
mouth. Asshole. I couldnt help myself.
Yeah, I wanted to mention that I see him every time I go over there, haha.
He tells me as he chews the piece of pork that was rightfully mine. Soon
enough, the rest of the dishes we ordered begin to arrive at our table along
with a tower of beer. Its only natural for my club members to so enticing
just like the president of the club. I had my chance to one up him so I took
it. He cant help but snicker.
Probably not as enticing as I am. Okay, that took some shameless guts to
admit that. I glance at him as he mockingly cocks one of his brows at me.
I agree, which is why that older lady is dying to take you home. I noticed
that this college student near our table has been staring at my friend with
glowing eyes for a long while now. I pretended not to notice since I thought
itd be safer that way.
Theres one behind you too. Phun retorts with a smile. I think it wouldve
been better if he had never said anything. Heh heh. I shrug at him to show
that Im not paying attention to what he said before I pour myself a glass of
beer from the tall tube. I figure I should have a glass as a rinse.
The foam quickly reaches the top of the glass forcing me to take a sip in a
hurry before it spills over. I notice that theres this somber feeling coming
from the left side of my chest.
Ive never liked when I get like this. Its like theres something preventing me
from laughing and smiling happily. I may be getting smart with Phun and
throwing some insults his way which makes it seems like everything is
normal. But deep down inside, the truth of the matter is that Im putting on a
mask to hide my sadness from him. Im keeping it hidden even though I
know that there is no possible way to escape from this. But at the very least,
Im able to trick myself into thinking that Im doing fine, if only just for a
moment.
Our conversation dies down as Phun continues to sip his glass of beer quietly
and stops trying to aggravate me. I sneak a look to see that his eyes seem to
be awfully dull and vacant. Sometimes I cant help but wonder what the
owner of those eyes are thinking.
I think back to Phuns kiss in the car. It felt so lonely, as if he wanted to
implore for something to happen. Im not sure if this is just my imagination,
but it seems Phun has plenty of things on his mind just as much as I do.
The sad melody from the song Thank You is playing as I continue chucking
my glass of beer. If one were to not pay attention, Id probably resemble an
old uncle whose boss had reduced his salary (which you will see many when
visiting beer gardens). Phun probably thinks of the same so he decides to
grab my arm to stop me before I finish my fifth glass as if Im on a non-stop
hits hour.
Yo! You havent even eaten yet, remember?! Are you trying to kill your
stomach drinking like that? Just as I suspected, he scolds me and snatches
the glass from my hand. Heh heh. I heard that you were the one who ordered
this though? Now youre trying to stop me from drinking? Heh heh. Bastard.

I provokingly shrug my shoulders at him and end up drinking a glass of water

to clear my throat before I get started on the huge plate of fried rice.
Meanwhile, Phun seems to be happy with his fried chicken tendons.
Yuri came all the way to the school to see me, I got really anxious. I start
another conversation to end the silence at our table (but with the band still
playing in the background). I notice that he flinches for a second. I guess he
was lost in his own thoughts too.
There is a small flash in Phuns eyes, then he slowly gives that same smile he
usually does. Oh, really? What happened?
You really need to come out with new rule for the buzz cut head trolls at our
school. They were all gawking at Yuri. If I showed up a bit later, she mightve
been kidnapped by then. I complain to him as I chew the food in my mouth.
I keep hearing the person sitting opposite of me breaking out in laughter
occasionally.
Youre calling them buzz cut head trolls, but you dont exactly have a head
full of hair yourself. Oh, this asshole! I dont mind if he insults me, but he
smacks me in the head too? This is how a fist fight starts.
I quickly shove his hand away. This is called a skinhead, asshole!
Are you high or something? This is no fucking skinhead. Why did you bring
Yuri up out of the blue anyway? Right, why did I do that? I really dont want
to tell him that Yuri came to me about him.
I dont know. So how are things with you and Aim? I feel itd be smarter to
quickly change the subject. I really didnt mean to ask such a question with
any implications, but it did end up catch him off guard.
Were so-so Phun answers me in a low voice. He pauses for a moment
before he continues. Im still handsome and shes still hot like always. Oh,
this fucking asshole! Im starting to hate you now!
I dont know what else to say (since they happen to be true) so I pretend to
choke on the rice and drink some water. I shoot him the middle finger but he
laughs at me as if hes really enjoying this. This irritates me even more.
I ought to stab you in the eyes.
I place my empty glass of water on the table before I pick up my utensils to
continue eating. However, I let a sentence slip out of my mouth.
Thats good. I was afraid that youd forget about the the front now that
youve tried the back. Hahaha. I laugh. Im laughing. Even though its not
really that funny at all. Im not laughing on the inside. There are the sounds
of laughter coming out of me, but theyre not real. Inside, I feel as if there
are a thousand knives stabbing my heart.
The louder I laugh, the more I realize how pathetic I really amthat is all.
Heh heh. Phun forces some chuckles out of him before he leans over to
pour some more beer in the glass that is nearly empty.
But then he says the following words with no emotions in his eyes.
Nah, I wouldnt
Theres a sharp pain running through from my toes all the way to my heart
when I heard those words. I raise one of my brows at him, like someone who
is accepting this fact.

See? Didnt I tell you that Im the stupid idiot that is ruining everything here?

CHAPTER 19: WE HAVE TO

Phun and I were pretty much out of it by the time we ate all the food and
finished that one tower of beer. How much were we out of it? Well, the last
hour before we left the restaurant, I got on the stage and showed off my
skills as the president of the music club by hosting a mini concert with the
band. We played 12 songs (yes, a dozen). I played the guitar, sang, played
the keyboard, the drums, and even the bass. I played them all. Not to brag,
but I can play all kinds of traditional Thai instruments, band instruments, and
orchestra instruments. How else can I have the title of President of the Music
Club? Hahaha. (But I wouldnt have done all these things if I werent so
wasted. Looking back, it was so embarrassing.)
We caused a huge buzz when we entered the restaurant, but we caused an
even bigger one when we were leaving. Hahaha. We left the restaurant with
the sounds of college girls screaming at us who were barely able to keep
themselves seated. The songs that we played changed the concept of this
regular restaurant into a small pub in the blink of an eye. Well, every table
had drinks on them. You cant expect us to play some easy-listening music or
people wouldve fallen asleep.
It was almost midnight by the time we asked for our check and learned that
the owner had taken more than half off our bill. Heh, I wonder whos
responsible for this. Between me in my blue shorts giving everyone a mini
concert for the ladies of Bang Saen or Phun, who is so visually striking that
all the aunties and college girls had to call up their friends so they could
come see for themselves at the restaurant.
At any rate, we drive away from the restaurant with wide smiles on our
faces. Phun takes his time and drives his two-door Honda along the beach
with the moonroof opened so I am able to fully appreciate the gorgeous
moon for myself.
Im feeling so much happiness that I wish this night doesnt have to end.
Even Spot the Difference game has a pause option. Why cant real life have
that too?
I sneak a peek at Phun whose face is full of smiles as well.
We drove back and forth near the beach area for a while as we finished off
about 3 or 4 cans of beer that we bought from 7-Eleven before we finally
checked in at a hotel. Despite the fact that its pretty pricey by Bang Saens
standards, Phuns Visa Gold Card doesnt have a problem with it.
Ill pay ya back when I get the money. I tell him as I pat his shoulder a
couple of times as we make our way to the room. I can hear his laughter
before he smacks me in the head.
You do realize that if I piss on the bed then youre gonna get wet too, you
bastard?
Dont worry about it, Ill just take it out of your clubs budget. What?!
Thats not cool! I scowl at Phun who is whistling away and pretending like he
isnt paying attention as he unlocks a door with the number 17 on it. If I

could swing my backpack and hit him in the head, then I wouldve done it.
But the backpack is too heavy and I didnt wanna injure my arms.
Waaaah~ This feels so nice!~ The moment the door opens, I throw the
backpack down and rush over to open the glass balcony door and let the sea
breeze runs through me. Meanwhile, Phun is too busy making sure the door
is locked properly. I dont know whether hes afraid that someone might
break in or that hes afraid I might try to escape.
I stand on the balcony and take in deep breaths of the sea breeze for a short
while before I feel a pair of warm arms coming from behind me and holding
me loosely around my waist. I can feel someones face resting on my
shoulder. I glance at Phun before I shrug so that his face bounces up and
down just for fun. Hey! We just got here and you wanna do it already? No
way, no way. You horndog. I really didnt mean anything by it, I just wanted
to mess with him. Heh heh.
Youre the horndog, I didnt even do anything yet. Of course, theres a
retort coming from him. But his voice is muffled since his face is still buried
in my shoulder. I laugh at his reply as I lower my hands that were on the
balcony railing to where Phuns hands are so I can hold them. So whats the
matter? We were fine so there has to be a reason for him to be doing this.
Can we stay like this for a while? Phuns voice sounds so fragile, it makes
me realize that its time to stop getting smart with him. I lean my head to
rest over his and stand still, allowing him to hold me as long as he needs.
But if I start getting a cramp on my legs then youre gonna have to deal
with me.
***
I could be brown, I could be blue, I could be violet sky.
Plenty of time has passed since we have been standing in this spot holding
one another before Phuns black phone begins making noises which ended
the silence. I turn to see the Nokia phone vibrating on the table in the middle
of other items that he had left on there.
I forgot to turn that off? He complains to himself in a low voice right next
to my ear before he lets go of my waist. This reminds me of the conversation
I had with Yuri earlier this evening right away.
My eyes follow the back of the person wearing an army green shirt as he
walks over to where the phone is. But it doesnt seem like Phun has any
intention of pressing the answer button.
Hey! Thats the button to turn it off! Dumbass! I yell at him when I notice
that hes still fussing with the button thatll turn the phone off instead of the
answer button. I rush over and knock him in the head to snap him out of the
blur. He immediately hits me on my forehead in return. Cause Im turning it
off, jeez.
But dont think that Id let this go easily. In the end, we fight over that
cellphone, pulling it back and forth between us (which is still ringing). I
happen to catch a glimpse of the screen. Its showing a photo of Aim. Theres
a weird pain all of a sudden. Aims calling, why are you turning it off?
The owner of the phone quickly averts my gaze.

Why dont you like me? Why dont you like me? Why dont you walk out the
door?
The phone blasts out those last few lines before it finally stops. Phun takes
this opportunity to quickly turn off the phone.
Who can be nice at every hour? Im a person, not a character in a drama on
TV.
I glance at my ringing iPhone that is next to my backpack, which I find funny.
The hubby ran away from the wife, look at everyone trying to get in touch
with him. Heh heh. As I walk over to answer the call from Yuri, Phunwho is
as quick as a monkeygrabs it right out of my hand and turns it off. He
ignores my objections and leaves me standing here with my mouth hanging
open.
Hey, you better watch it! Thats my phone. Theres a hint of anger in my
voice. Who on earth taught him to have such terrible manners?
But it seems my protest doesnt affect Phun in any way whatsoever. His face
is completely expressionless as he carelessly throws my phone on the bed. I
was about to open my mouth to yell at him when he grabs me and holds me
very tightly.
I wouldve resisted if his shoulders werent shaking so much that its
alarming me.
Whats wrong, Phun?
Theres a raspy voice coming from the trembling person holding me. Can it
be just us tonight? Lets not mention anybody else
..
I am still. I stare at the head of the person who is holding me tightly with so
many mixed emotions. Even though I feel weightless in my chest, there are a
ton of thoughts running wild inside my head. Im trying to look forward, but I
feel that I cannot see anything else other than a dead end.
Truth be told, Im the other person in this situation. Phun and I cant even use
the word we. Theres nothing going on between him and me. There
shouldnt be anything going on between him and me. And there will never be
anything going on between him and me. It doesnt matter how Phun feels
about me or how I feel about him. No matter how much those feelings exist,
all I can see in front of me are Phun and Aim, who are supposed to be
happier than they are right now.
I hug him tightly, but its hurting me so bad that it feels like Im hugging a
prickly durian. The harder I squeeze him, the more pain I feel. Its hurting so
badly that Im not sure how long I can keep hugging him like this.
You shouldnt be having problems with Aim because of meseriously. This
is what I want to tell him the most in this moment.
Phun shakes his head which is still buried in my chest. Im not having
problems with Aim because of you. But I do because its my own fault. His
voice is trembling and is filled with confusion. Its as if its coming from
someone who no longer knows what to do. The arms which are wrapped
around me are shaking. Theyre showing me their owners current state of
mind.

I know that I shouldnt make things worse for him.

Whatkind of problems are youhaving? I ask since I want to know the
answer. But he goes silent for a moment before he starts speaking.
Im a fucking asshole. I already have Aim but I still went after you.
Real assholes wouldnt bother calling themselves an asshole. Come on, lets
go sit and talk? I let out a sigh as I let go of him and lead him to take a seat
on the bed.
Phun presses his lips together very tightly and stares at the bed sheet. He
refuses to lift his head to look at me. HeyImsorry.
Why are you sorry? Tell me everything.
Aim and I.weve had sex At last, those words make their way out of
him. Despite the fact that I already know about this, hearing those words
coming out of Phun cuts me deeper by tenfold than when I heard them from
Yuri. They hit me like a brick and I feel numb from the immense pain. I glance
away just for only a short moment before I look back at his face. Okay
what else?
Phun takes another deep breath, but this time he lifts his head and locks his
eyes with mine. But I still cant help myselfwhen Im around you. All I see
are anguish his eyes. I cant help but wonder if Phun can see the same thing
from my own eyes.
Those lips continue to move even though I begin to feel like I no longer want
to hear what he has to tell me. I cant just leave Aim. But with you, I feelI
dont know what to do. At this point, Phun looks down and tighten his grips
on the bed sheet. I reach over and gently place my own hand over his fist.
Because I know that I need to be the one to do this.
Listen to me This is the toughest challenge that I have ever faced in my
entire life.
Aim is a woman. You cant just leave her after youve had that kind of a
relationship with her. You need to go back and look after her. Im a guy. I
dont have anything to lose. I thought that what I was saying is completely
normal and logical, but Phun pops his head up so fast as if he was listening
to a ghost story.
Nohstop talking Theres a hint of intimidation in his voice, but I realize
that I cannot give in to him. I continue facing this tiring challenge by giving
him a smile.
Go find some glue and you can glue my lips shut then. Lets just agree to let
things die down between us. Im not too concerned about it. I tell him with a
smile as I look at his face. Phuns mouth is opened as if he wants to argue,
but hes too slow for me. Ill tell you this again. Im not some chick, you
bastard. He immediately grabs a hold of my wrists.
Noh, dont you understand that this has nothing to do with that? It has
nothing to do with who is what. It has to do with what Ive done. Noh, dont
you get it?! His eyes are staring so deep into mine that Im too afraid to look
away. I look into those dull black eyes that suddenly feel so unfamiliar.
Phuns lips continue to move. After all the things that have happened
between usplease dont tell me that youre just going to leave

I quickly free myself from his restraints and desperately force out a laughter.
Hahahayou jerk. Dont act like such a gentleman. Are you converting to
Islam so you can have multiple wives or something? I feel as if I have no
energy left in my entire body but I still need to keep talking.
And dont forget that I already have a girlfriend too. Im so damn swamped
with the soccer thing right now. Even Earn wants the band to help with a
bunch of stuff. Therefore, I dont have any free time to accept the job of
being another person youre seeing. Its so exhausting and I dont even get
paid overtime. Wasnt that funny? But he isnt laughing though. I force out a
chuckle for him to hear even though Im about to burst into tears.
I can read what he wants to tell me from his eyes.
And I know that Phun can read what Im trying to tell him from my eyes too.
I suppose theres nothing else left to be discussed out loud.
Phun and I both stay still and stare at each others face. Ive reached the end
of my limits. I cant endure it any longer.
Phun! I yell out his name as I throw myself over to hug him tightly. He
hesitantly puts his arms around me. In this moment, I dont have an ounce of
strength left.
I can only hear the voice of a selfish person echoing inside my heart saying
that I dont want to let Phun go.
Noh?
Hey
What is it?
Please dont let go of meat least until tomorrow morning?
It barely takes any time to fall in love, so why is it such a complete torture
when its time we need to say goodbye?

CHAPTER 20: THE CHOSEN WAY

We left Bang Saen since 5 in the morning. (Would you believe me if I tell you
that Ive never had to perk up even before the roosters are up in my entire
life?) We had plenty of time to grab some breakfast together. Luckily for us,
there werent any heavy traffic so we arrived in Bangkok without having to
worry.
Phuns two-doors black Honda Civic stops near the sidewalk in front of the
school at exactly 8 am. We arrive just in time to see Ms. Wantana and Mr.
Bancha scolding some junior high students for not tucking in their shirts
inside their shorts properly.
Speaking of which, I should be doing that since I dont want to get scolded so
early in the morning.
You sure itll be okay for you to show up late? I ask Phun who is sitting the
driver steal while still wearing his everyday clothes as I tuck in my shirt. We
drove straight from Bang Saen to the school and didnt stop at either of our
homes. Phun gives me a small smile when he hears my question, Itll be
okay, you better hurry.
Okay, be careful getting home. There are a lot of cops patrolling in the
morning. You dont even have your drivers license yet, you idiot.
I look older than my age, itll be fine. Heh, a self-deprecating humor.
Oh, so you do realize that. I tell him with a chuckle before I lean over to
grab my black backpack in the backseat. I turn around just as Phuns face
slowly moves closer to my face.
His thin light orange lips are inviting me to make contact with them. Those
lips are locking with mine so intensely, it is as if they refuse to let me go. I
reach my hand over and stroke Phuns strands of hair that seem to be longer
than what a typical high schooler should have. Meanwhile, Phun is clutching
my face so that I wouldnt be able to break free.
We stay like this for so long that I barely have any air left inside my lungs.
Our tongues continue to intertwine and tease one another. I had to do
something before wed be unable to stop ourselves.
Phun I whisper his name even though our lips are still pressed together. I
wait until he pauses to look at my face before I move away.
I give him a smile. I wanted to give him a meaningful smile that came from
my heart.
I better get going.
I dont know what the sounds that come after that are trying to tell me.
Because I only know that once I closed that black car door, the story
between Noh and Phun has ended as well.
***
Yo, Noh! I dont need to turn around to know who yelled my name. I stop so
that Om and Rodkeng, who are running over while gasping for air, can catch
up. Interesting, whenever I show up early, these guys show up early.

Whenever I show up late, they show up late too. Talk about having a strong
friendship instinct.
Whats up, assholes? Howd you get away from the teachers?
By running for our lives like you just saw. Om tells me as he pulls out his
shirt from his shorts and allows the flaps to hang lower than an 80 year-old
grandmothers boobs. I follow his example and pull mine out too. Having to
wear your shirt flaps inside the shorts can be super uncomfortable, you
know!
So what the heck happened? How come Phun dropped you off? Where is he
parking the car anyway? Wwhwhat?! I was busy with untucking my shirt
but I had to snap my head back up and look at Rodkeng with widen eyes.
How did he know that I got to school with Phun?!
I bet they spent the night together again. Its not like this bastard ever
brings a backpack to school like this. Goddamn Om hits the nail on the
head. I nearly trip and bang my head. Seriously, no one will blame you if you
choose to keep your thoughts to yourself! Damn you!
Eh?! For real?! You and Phun are that close now? I had no idea! Enough
with the questions! Let me ask mine first!
Howd you know that I got here with Phun?
I saw his car. The black two-door Civic with the license plate 8899 and the
entry permission stickers for the Parliament House of Thailand and another
one for Chulalongkorn University. Jeez, listen to him describe it in details.
Even the real car owner would find this troubling. He knows his stuff, I might
as well surrender to Rodkeng.
Fine, I give up. Yeah, I got to the school with Phun. Happy now? Heh heh. I
tell him while being slightly annoyed since I got caught.WaitI got caught?
What the fuck did they see?!
I glance over to stare at Rodkeng and Om who has gotten quiet. Om is busy
untangling his iPod earbuds since he was running earlier. Rodkeng is just
looking at his phone and seems pretty normal. Neither of them is causing
any suspicions. But, just to be sure
Did you see Phun in the car? Im trying to beat around the bush as much as
I possibly can with that question. However, Om is still trying untangle his
earphones and Rodkeng still has his eyes on his phone. They both shake
their head in return.
How could I? His car is tinted so dark as if the windows are painted black. I
only realized it was his car because I recognize his license plate numbers and
the fancy entry permission stickers on the window. Oh, what a relief. That
was a close call.
Why? Were you two fucking in the car? Leave it to Om to come up with
these stuff. Hed sell out his friends before anything else. I stomp on his foot
after he finishes yapping. Ow!
Next time, Im shoving a clown shoe up your stupid ass. My threat to Om
makes Rodkeng bursts out in laughter. Technically, he was already laughing
when he heard Om asked whether Phun and I were fucking in the car. (Who

would do that?! That car sits too close to the ground! Uh! Thats not what I
meant!)
So how did you start hanging out with Phun anyway? Two years ago, I had
to practically force you into going to his birthday party with me cause you
said you didnt wanna go. Rodkeng continues to interrogate me as we make
our way inside the building. There was a small pause since I have no idea
how to explain this to him.
We got pretty close because of the clubs budget problems. Hes been
helping me out.
Since youve been letting him stick it in your ass! Ugh! That fucking Om!
So you really want a boot up your ass, is that it? I turn left and right to see if
there were any junior high kids around, (who would be the unlucky
participants since theyd be wearing pairs of clown shoes and comic belts as
punishment by the schools chancellor) but I couldnt see any so I lifted my
own shoe to threaten him instead.
Naturally, he runs up the stairs in a hurry as if it is his feeding time and
someone is ringing a bell summoning him.
Fucking Om. I curse after him while Rodkeng laughs in the background.
***
By now, it is our lunch break. I took Brother Sakdas Social Studies exam (in a
daze) so now its time for everyone to release their pent up energy in the
classroom.
Our desks were moved around to make a huge round empty space in the
middle of the room for our temporary battleground. We needed plenty of
space so that everyone of us could move around easily.
Oh, were not having a fight. ^^ This may be an all-boy school but were all
a bunch of chickens. This is what were playing
Youre done for, stupid Keng! Pong yells loudly as he jokes around with
Keng who has been walking around the desk for about 5 or 6 times now. (Im
getting dizzy for him) Hes not saying a word and keeps circling around for
the 6th or 7th time. He wants to find a block that he can remove so the tower
wont fall down.
Yup, were playing Jenga. There are about 10 or so of us playing. Luckily, I got
to be the first one removing a block when we were drawing on who gets to
go first. But now I dont feel so lucky, because after Keng and Khom, itll be
my turn again.
So how the heck am I supposed to make sure the tower wont collapse?!
Cant it fall down now? Please?!
Dickhead, Ive been waiting for so long that an African elephant is about to
give birth. Id still make it back here in time even if I go and help deliver the
baby. Rodkeng is making such a fuss since Keng is taking his sweet time.
Sure, he runs his mouth off when its other peoples turn. But when its his
turn? He takes so long that by the time he chooses, our lunch break is almost
over.
Go ahead, sure. Ride a bicycle, Ill probably take long ass while.

Asshat, are you gonna choose one already or do I need to flick this damn
tower down?
Fine, fine, fine! Im doing it! He says as he quickly pulls out a block from
the tower without barely thinking. (Because it seemed like Rodkeng was
serious about flicking the tower.) Everyone in the room holds their breath in
anticipation. The tower is leaning back and forth very dangerously. It seems
that itll fall down at any moment.
Foo! Foo! Foo! That smartass Om is blowing at the tower so that itd
collapse during Kengs turn by using a tactic were all familiar with. However,
Keng is onto him since hes using a size 43 leather shoe to shove at Oms
crotch. Motherfucker!
However, the louder the guys are being, the more vibrations were causing to
the floor. The Jenga tower is leaning back and forth even more dangerously
now. Yo! Yo! Yo! What the hell are you yelling for? Youre the reason the
floor is shaking right now, stupid Keng.
I anxiously watch as the tower of blocks lean to the left, then to the right.
Kengs mouth is wide opened. Hes being generous to about four flies which
now has a place to stay inside this throat. He slowly closes his mouth now
that it seems the tower is stabilizing.
YAAAAAY!
Honestly, were you this excited the first time you made rice for your mother?
I squint my eyes at that stupid Keng who is now running around the room
five times like Superman as if hes an Olympic athlete. (Next time try paying
your respects in all four directions too, bastard.) Then he turns around and
cocks one his brows at Khom, who is next in line.
Sofuckingdead. I mouth those words at Khom so he smacks me hard in
the head. Damn it, I shouldnt have asked for that.
While Khom is being possessed by the Jenga spirit and walks around the
table for the third time, (you might as well start the cremation ceremony at
this point) I hear a voice from another classmate of mine who just got back
from having lunch.
Noh! Someones here to see you! Who the heck is it?
Go and find out. I cant focus seeing your dumb face. What the fuck,
Khom? How is this my fault? I kick him in the ass before I run over to the
door. I thought that it might be one of the underclassmen from the marching
band having some problems during practice. I figured Id be able to help.
However, this is no marching band member. This is worse than having to
deal with an entire marching band. The student council secretary is standing
here waiting for me.
I stare at the person I said goodbye to earlier this morning with a weird
expression on my face before I try breaking into a smile that is as natural as I
could possibly made.
What the hell do you want? If youre here for money then sorry, this class is
too poor. We dont have anything to give. I decide to poke fun at the
problems the student council is facing lately. The school needs a lot of fixing
up and improvements so the faculties have been trying to bleed the poor

students dry. And it worked, because Phun hits me with his knuckles as a
reward. Ow, I just got hit by Khom too.
Ill definitely be here for the money eventually, but thats not today. Jeez,
thats not something I wanted to hear. How did your test go? Thats not
what I wanted to hear either. -_-
I did alright. When did you get back to school? Im trying very hard to carry
a normal conversation with him. (Technically, this is not even normal. It isnt
like weve ever had a conversation in front of my classroom like this before.) I
can see Phun making an irritated face when I mention his trip.
I just got here. I almost got caught too. Fortunately, there were a lot of cars
so I just sped right through the blockades. This troll sounds so proud of
himself. I cant help but give him a worrisome look. I did tell him not to drive.
I open my mouth to yell at him some more, but I happen to lock my eyes
with his. Suddenly, I notice that he is looking at me with such crestfallen
eyes.
We stand there in silence for a while since I dont know what to say. I feel like
reaching out my hand to touch Phun, but I cant even do that.
Shit, Noh! Youre screwed! Khom made it! Oh, fuck! I can hear Kengs voice
from hell blasting from inside the classroom. It startles me and I quickly turn
to the source of that voice.
Yeah, yeah! Im coming! Goddamn, how are you guys so good at this? Um,
Phun? Is there anything else? I yell a reply at Keng before I turn my
attention back to Phun. All I get as an answer is him shaking his head as if he
is caught off guard.
If theres nothing else, then Im gonna get back to the gamebye. I dont
wait to hear a reply and rush back to the temporary battlefield right away.
I suppose this is how things will be now

CHAPTER 21: HELPER

As of late, things are incredibly busy for me at the school. Is there a different
way to express how busy I really am other than repeating very busy over
and over? Well, let me know if there is one so I can start using that word.
Basically, Im very busy.
Based on chapter one all the way to twenty, you guys probably wonder if I
really am the president of the music club, right? Well, I cant believe that I
had the time to deal with so much nonsense myself either. The soccer
tournament is approaching and its only a few weeks away.
Even though I have the title of President of the Music Club, I did play in a live
band as a member of the club. Ive never played in a marching band before
despite having some knowledge about it though. Im going slightly crazy
since you cant really expect me to pick up these projects and throw myself
at them out of the blue. I have no choice but to run around and ask seniors
and other alumni for help.
Our practice schedules are pretty extreme. Theres a practice at 7 in the
morning. Later, the poor guys need to bring their lunch all the way to the
club room during their break. In the evening, the practice lasts until 7 pm
(sometimes to 8-9 pm). There isnt much for me to do for the morning
schedule aside from checking if things are going smoothly for the
underclassmen when they play our national anthem in front of the flag pole. I
dont have much to do in the afternoon either (I mean, I was playing Jenga
just the other day) because Film is handling the afternoon schedules. As for
the evening, I do need to attend since Im the one that lifts everyones
morale, hahaha. (I assume.)
Our club room seems to be really chaotic today. There are so many sounds
coming from many different instruments clashing into one another. (Will they
ever become a real song?) Then there are sounds of our voices occasionally
scolding the underclassmen when they arent focusing. I dont mind if
anyone will accuse us of being cruel, its just that we really need the event to
turn out perfectly. There is no way wed humiliate ourselves in front of three
other schools who will be there, so I believe that our club members
understand why were doing this to them. (If not now, then in about two or
three years.)
PNoh! Theyre here! What do we do?! Damn it, Im still in the middle of my
explanations to the readers. Why did you have to yell and interrupted me?!
Will you believe me if I say that I dont need to turn around to see who they
are? It has to be Per and Knot, also known as the wall destroyers of our
school since they use their loud and frantic voices as weapons. I glance at
the wall which begins to form cracks in them here and there.
What the hell are you two on about? I walk over to where they are with a
grim look on my face after I told other club members to keep practicing and
not to pay any attention to those two. I watch as two not-so-cute puppies

pant by the entrance to the room as if they had just escaped from a police
chase.
PNohpeople from hia Puigaspgaspsgasp I find Knots attempt to
speak utterly pitiful. Hes trying to talk when he raises his head, but he ends
up sprawling on the floor gasping for air.
Now its Pers turn. Hia Pui isgaspgaspgasp... This idiot manages to
give me even less information. -_- Will I ever find out whats going on
today?!
Why? Was he chasing after you twos asses? Then Im ordering you both to
give them up to him for the 20,000 baht that we need for the drums! I only
meant this as a joke. I didnt think that both Per and Knot would perk up and
point at me like Uncle Panya simultaneously.
Thatthats it, p! Hia Pui delivered the new set of drums over at Building
2003. Holy shit! Im royally screwed, arent I?! Im about to faint and join Per
and Knot on the floor even though I wasnt even running like they were.
What do we do, p? Should we call pDew? Do we have enough money in our
clubs backup savings? PDew is in the 12th grade. Hes the treasurer
working under Miss Pataraporns guidance. However
The money is there, but they need it for the uniforms and to pay for all the
equipment repairs since you guys have been practicing so much that theyre
breaking down. Plus, they also need the money for you guys welfare. There
are a lot! Then theres the Loi Krathong festival, the Live Contest, and the
Christmas Fair too. You know what, just go call Ngoi so I could kick his ass.
Basically, our club needs a lot of money for a lot of reasons. Am I gonna need
to sell myself for money?
I think you should just call pPhun. Arent you two close?
Can you stop saying that were close already? Hes really touching on a
sore spot here.
Eh?! But why? Are you two having a fight?
Nooooooooo. Im brushing Per, who is being so damn nosy, off. I think back
to what Phun told me about how hes handing the money situation but he
said that he needs some time to get to it because the budgets have been
finalized. He promised me that he will definitely take care of this. (Heh heh.
Mr. Capable.)
I dont wanna bug him, and hes already helping us anyway. Per, take me to
see hia Pui. Ill talk to him myself. He probably wont be too cruel with me. I
tell Per as I take in a deep breath before I drag him with me. He seems to be
confused and mutters something about having to be in the sun again to
himself. I dont really care, I just want him to take me there.
The two of us make our way to Building 2003, which is where the
administrative offices are located. I barely have the time to prepare myself
since I already spot hia Pui and his men delivering the drums from afar. Ah
if I die today, will there be a flag covering my dead body as they send me
home?

Hey, nong Noh! Whats up?! Hia Pui shouts at me from miles away. Im still
standing here looking pale, Im not sure if he can see my face from all the
way over there.
I slowly stride over to where he is while trying to give him the least lamest
smile I could possibly make. Hhello, hia Pui. Areare you well? Seems like
Im asking such a dumb question, isnt it? -_-
Of course, I am! Hows the soccer tournament preparations coming along?
Are you finally gonna get to wear that jumpsuit that youve always wanted to
wear this time around? Hahaha He seriously strikes a nerve with that
question. T__T He graduated from this school about 6-7 years ago. When he
was studying here, he was in this club too.
Like heck! Im the club president, its not like Id be working in the arena
stands just randomly. I get sad just thinking about this. However he is loudly
laughing at me. So you get joy from other peoples suffering? The staff
members that work on the upcoming tournament get to wear a jumpsuit. A
lot of different departments will be wearing them. For example, the cheer
team, student welfares, supplies team, designers, and the people handling
all the technical stuff. Theyre like uniforms, think of them like what electric
engineers or firemen wear. The jumpsuits are cream with a light khaki tone
to them. (What the hell is that color called?) I think that they look so cool. Its
been my dream to wear one. (I guess I want to be a fireman someday.)
Yeah, I saw that you were really depressed over that last year. You wanted
to join the supplies team but then Oak dragged you back to work with the
band. If only you could see the look on your face back then! It was hilarious!
Hahaha! POak was the previous president of the music club. I have no idea
why he was so attached me. He refused to let me leave the club to do
anything else. And he always dragged me to be a part of all the important
events every single time. After he graduated, he passed the president title to
me. This poor Noh!
Exactly. He pretty much shattered my dreams. You know, getting to wear
that jumpsuit is a dream of mine!
However, seeing the band continues to move forward and becomes as
successful as other schools is a dream for the students of this school, and
also the band members too. Hia Pui tells me with a smile which invites me
to smile along with him. This is the reason why I agreed to become the
president of the club.
Its gonna be awesome this year. I tell hia Pui and he pokes me with his
elbow since I was trying to talk big to an alumnus. But then he finally
mention those dreadful words. Shit, Noh. Quit showing off and pay up first.
Its 24,000. Ahhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh!
What now?!
Umwell
Dont tell me you dont have the money If I cant tell him that then what
else am I supposed to tell him?!
ThenI dont have the cash. Was that the same thing?

Smartass. The Brother hasnt given you the money yet? Im a bit relieved
to hear him say this since he might understandmaybe?
I scratch my head, Its something like that, hia. The school has been making
a lot of changes to the landscaping so they dont really have a lot of money
to spare. We even had to hold a special budget meeting just for this
tournament alone. Not to mention that were also paying stuff out of our own
pockets too.
Dang! The school already looks nice, why are they making changes? You all
should start a protest.
Yeah, we were thinking about marching from our school to the convent.
What do you think?
Yeah, Ill join ya. Bastard, dont change the subject! Theres no brotherhood
when it comes to money! AhI was so close to getting away with it.
Hia, Ill definitely pay you. The people from the student council promised me
that theyll find the money. I just need to wait a bit. Please? Come on? Im
clinging on to his arm as if Im a leech. Im hoping that hed find this
adorable enough to be lenient with me. However, he shoves me off like hes
completely disgusted by this act. Enough of that, Noh. If you were one of
the girls from the convent then I wouldnt be feeling these freaky
goosebumps. Blah! He tells me as he shudders as a visual example. (Im
getting goosebumps too.)
Fine, you can take the drums. But can you transfer the money within this
week? I dont want my dad to yell at me. I always let you guys have the stuff
before getting paid. Ah! Im so happy that I wanted to jump and kiss him on
the head for two or three times.
Sure thing, hia!
***
I said sure but Im not even sure if Phun will come through before this week
is over.
Sigh. What a huge problem for this poor club president.
Its getting dark, Im currently sitting on the stands in front of the Building F
while hanging my head. The band had already finished their practice. (My
throat is hoarse from all the yelling I did, cough cough.) Im also not in the
mood to go home right now since the traffic is pretty goddamn awful around
this time. (Actually, my house is near Ekamai Road and the traffic is always
bad there no matter which time of day.) So here I am laying around playing
with the Rubiks Cube in front of Building F, not knowing for certain what to
do. I mean, I did drop by for a bit to check the stands since they still havent
finished with the repairs. They werent going to fix them here though, they
had just moved. Im not entirely sure what their plans are.
Hey, Noh! All your band members went home already? Who the heck is
calling my name? I raise my brows and stop messing with the Rubiks Cube
before I look up to see someone with sharp features which belong to Earn.
Hes sitting down next to me. Earn is the president of the cheer team this
year. Hes pretty big and tall (since he needs to watch over a ton of
underclassmen). I like his dimples, I think theyre cute.

Yeah, practice ended a little bit ago so I decided to come by and check on
your cheer teams supposedly awesome progress. I answer him as I move
myself (from the lazily laid back position) so I can chat with him properly. I
can hear his lively laughter when I finished talking.
Heh? You got some balls saying that to me.
Ah, come on. Just messing with ya for a bit, Mr. President. Hahaha. I laugh
as I kick his upper thigh since he is sitting close enough to me. Not too far of
us, I can see the cheer team members being scolded by their seniors. Im
guessing the practice isnt going so well.
Earn watches scene as he begins to speak, Its too bad. I wanted you to
come help us. I actually was going to make you the vice-president. No,
thank you! Cant I just be a normal student for once?! I dont need any more
titles! -*- I quickly shake my head.
Hows the band doing? I heard they asked for extra drummers this year?
Stupid Earn continues to feed me questions. Only these are the ones that get
on my nerves since he was the one who requested those extra drummers!
Yes, you bastard. Im so damn busy now. They had just delivered the drums
and I didnt even have the money to pay them. Im really over it.
Whoa, thats a huge problem! How much are they?
Over 20k, huge enough for ya? I answer him while I raise my brows at him
mockingly. Hes a bit taken back by this. Heh heh. Yep, I had that same face
when I found out that there was 20k missing from our club budget.
That is huge. And the schools not giving you the money? Talking about this
is making me pretty irritated.
We screwed up during the budget meeting so we cant get the money just
yet. Im not sure when well get the money. I tell him while Phuns face pops
into my head.
Wanna use my money in the meantime? Butwhaaat?! Did I hear that
wrong?! My eyes are as big as a gooses egg now.
I stare at him in shock but Earn simply smiles back at me. Yeah, I totally
heard that wrong. What did you just say? MamyPoko? Are you talking about
that diaper brand?*
I watch as Earn looks up and laughs heartily before he stands up and grabs
me so that Id stand up with him. I get up, although still pretty confused, and
I watch him muttering something to his friends that are keeping watch over
the cheer practice. Ill be right back! A couple of science major students
raise their hands to tell him that they heard him.
Follow me. What the heck are you up to?!
***
I almost got on my knees and kissed Earns feet after I saw that 24,000 baht
has been transferred to hia Puis Bank of Ayudhya account according to the
ATM.
Earnnnnnn! Thank youuuuu! Thank youuuuuuuuu! Ive probably said this
to him about a hundred times now. He can only laugh in return.

You dont need to wai me! He runs away trying to dodge my clasped
hands. But why?! I really am touched by this! Hey, Ill pay ya back as soon
as I get the money. Im sorry that I had to bother you with this.
Yeah, its fine. Earn waves me off, But can I ask for a favor? Uhthis
sentence sounds eerie familiar.
Why is it that everyone asks for something in return whenever they decide to
help me with something?!
Can I? He asks me again. Im very hesitant to answer since I kind of
learned my lesson from the last time from Phun. Whwhat is it? If I can help
then Ill help.
My heart sinks to the ground when I see his wide grin.
I want you to
.
you to
Asshole, just get to it! Ill still curse at those I owe favors to.
Hahaha. Okay, Ill stop messing with you. Can you bring over some of the
beverages from your band during the event? Oh, is that it? Why did you
have to make such a scary face? I smile back once I heard this.
Sure! But we get ours from the cheer team anyway though? Are you high?
You already have your own drinks.
NoI meantIll probably be pretty exhausted during the event. So can
youtake care of meby keeping me hydrated and stuff? I meanI dont
wanna bug the supplies team over this. So you want me to be your personal
butler and feed you food and make sure you drink water? Heh, what a
weirdo. Do other people do this in the previous years?
It sounds strange to me, but I agree to do it because its not like this is
something terrible. Well be pretty much free to do whatever we want after
were done marching anyway. Sure, Ill go hang around you during the
event. But I dont have a jumpsuit to wear though. The jumpsuitthat the
cheer team gets to wear. Im too much of a loser, I dont have one to wear
like they do. All I get to wear is a simple t-shirt and jeans attire. T___T
Thats fine. Just make sure you show up?
Jeez, this is a lot easier than what Phun asked me to do. Of course, Ill show
up.
CHAPTER 22: THE THING WE CAN
Its morning and were even closer to the tournament now. Im pacing back
and forth while staring at my own shoes in front of the student council office.
Im not sure if I should just open the door and enter. Would that be too weird?
I keep pondering over and over while circling in this area to the point where
Im starting to get dizzy. I dont think I should keep doing this unless I want to
leave a small present on the floor of this building. Butwhy am I pacing back
and forth like this anyway?
I scold myself for a while before I decide to pull out my cellphone and stare
at the screen. Well, I need to speak to Phun about the budget issues that we

talked about, otherwise Id be in trouble. What should I do? Should I just call
him instead? But
I secretly kinda wanna see him
Wait! What am I even thinking?! This is so dumb! I hit my own head with my
knuckles heavily for having such an appropriate thought about someone
elses boyfriend. I decide to dial Phuns number and hit call.
Its wonderful enough that we are friends
Even though we can only be in the same vicinity
That person probably wont mind
It cant be helped that you fell in love with that person first
I keep having to hide everything
So that you cannot see them from my eyes
Jeezwhat the fuck is with this ringback tone of his? I immediately shove my
phone away from my ear when I hear the lyrics. (Who sings this? Ive never
heard of it.) I only had a short amount of time to wonder before I hear Phuns
deep voice on the other line.
Yes, Noh?
Dont be so damn polite! Youre making me feel weird!
Wherethe hell are you?
At the student council office. Where are you? Should I go and find you?
Hes such a willing participant. I chuckle into my phone before I glance up to
read the sign on top of the student council office. See you in half a second.
It really was half a second before I pushed the door and entered the room the
moment I hung up. Phun is stunned to see me. (Hes still holding his phone
up to his ear, heh heh.) However, hes not alone in the office. I forgot that
this isnt actually his personal office. Theres Fi (the student council
president), Bank (I dont know his title), two 10th graders, andEarn, the
president of the cheer team. Theyre all staring at me.
Eh? Noh! What are you doing here? Earn greets me before anyone else.
There is a small smile on Phuns face as he puts his cellphone away. Why
didnt you just come in? Heh heh heh. I guess Earn knows why Im here now
that he hears Phuns question.
I mockingly shrug at Phun before I turn to smile at Earn who appears to be
counting items from a huge pile. Well, I guess my meddlesome genes is
activating. Whats that, Earn?! That bag is freaking huge!

Souvenirs for the guys that will be on the stands. He answers me with a
small grin as he shows one off to me. This year, the memento is a silver dog
tag with our schools name on it. In the back, theres an engraved text which
reads, ALL IS ONE. Its so freaking pretty!
That is sooooo freaking coooool! I want one! Can I get one if there are
leftovers? I jump at the dog tags once I see them since I want one very
badly. (So freaking much.) Earn breaks out in laughter, probably because Im
clinging to his arm like a kitten.
Why the hell is Phun clearing this throat anyway? I guess hes getting sick
again.
Ya dont need to wait for the leftovers, Noh. Earn tells me out of the blue.
As usual, I dont quite understand what he means. I let go of his arm when I
notice that hes rummaging through the the bag.
Ill give ya one now. Not only he tells me this, but he hands me a dog tag
too. My eyes are almost as wide as when he offered to let me borrow the
money. Even though Im pretty excited, I still do have some conscience left in
me.
What? I cant take that! I quickly avoid the president of the cheer teams
hands which are about to put the dog tag around my neck. Im causing a
loud ruckus over not accepting it.
Yo! Those belong to the underclassmen working on the stands! I should wait
and if there are any leftovers then Ill take one. Itll look awful otherwise,
man. I mean what I say. Its true that I do get a souvenir meant for the
cheer team participants every soccer tournament, but every single time
theyre leftovers after all the participants had received theirs. Those
mementos are gifts for the junior high students who gave up their free time
and were willing to work with the seniors. (Not to mention getting scolded at
plenty of times.) Theyre not meant for the upperclassmen to give around to
one another like this.
However, it seems that Earn doesnt care since he shrugs me off. Whatever,
therell be leftovers anyway. Im giving you one now so someone else cant
take yours. Hes still trying to put the dog tag around my neck. Jeez! No
matter which way Im trying to dodge him, I just cant get away from Earn
who is as big as a bull.
I dont waaaaaant ittttttt.

Nope, this one is considered given away. Im not taking it back. He

forcefully puts the dog tag around my neck with a wide grin on his face. I feel
the dog tag with my fingers in a daze, it feels like Im being forced into a
situation once again.
Ill be right back, Fi Oh! That was Phuns voice! I almost forgot the reason
Im here! I quickly turn around to face Phun but he avoids my gaze. That jerk.
He promptly makes his way out of the office. Dang it, dang it, dang it!
Ill get you for this next time, Earn! Ill be right back!

***

Phun! Phun! Phun! Damn it, Phun! Fuck, Im exhausted! He races away
from me. Its bad enough with those long legs of his but hes moving pretty
fast too. Its like Im chasing down a loose buffalo. Dont you feel bad for the
person chasing after you?! Its not like I exercise regularly! Dont you know
how tiring this is?
Hey, I came to ask you about my clubs budget! Im just going to yell since
I cant catch up to him. I thought, while I shout down the path near the
building that is usually pretty empty. It worked. Phun stops in his track and
gives me an opportunity to catch up to him. Hes still refusing to face me
though.
Whats the matter? Youre acting weird. Are you sick? I reach over to take
his temperature with the back of my hand by placing it on his neck. (Actually,
I dont know how hot or cold its supposed to feel like. Im only doing this just
because thats what people do in this situation.) But I notice that Phun
quickly dodges me by leaning away before he finally turns around to face
me.
What about the budget? Im still trying to help. Sorry. Phun looks so guilty
that I need to pat him on the shoulder to comfort him. At any rate, I feel
better hearing him saying that. I know that he is someone thatll help me no
matter what. I dont regret having faith in him. I only came by to ask just to
be sure, that was all.
Are you in a rush? Phun asks me again. I start to feel awkward. Its like my
lips arent moving the way I want them to. So, how should I answer him?

WellI was at first. Hia Pui delivered the drums yesterday and he wanted
the money by the end of the week. But nowwellIm still in a hurry just not
as much anymore. That didnt make a lot of sense, did it? Im just as
confused.
What does that mean? So do you need the money by the end of this week?
If you do then take mine. Jeez. Our school is filled with rich dudes, is that
it?!
Its okay, its okay. I ran into Earn yesterday and he helped transferred the
money. I just need topay him back. I dont want to be in his debt for too
long, I feel bad about it. My voice is weakening as I explain this to Phun. I
also notice that his expression is changing.
Youtold Earn about this?
YeahI ran into him yesterday evening.
And you talked to him about your budget issues?
YeahI was just looking for some advice.
Advice? At this point, Im beginning to get annoyed by all these questions.
What the hell is up with you? Why are you interrogating me about this?! As
usual, I yell at him. However, he quickly turns and stare at my face. I can feel
my entire body shrinking to the size of a tennis ball.
How come he looks so scary? T__T
I flinch a little since Phun has such a mean expression on his face. I slowly
take steps backward because the person in front of me is moving closer to
me. Eventually, I can feel that there is a wall directly behind me.
AhI dont have any space left to flee. Is he gonna kill me and bury me
under concrete to get rid of all evidence? T__T
A hoarse noise leaves from Phuns throat. It is like its coming from someone
trying very hard not to raise their voice.
You Me? Me what?
I stare back at him while he locks his eyes with mine. A moment later, he is
the one that turns his face away. I cant help but let out a sigh of relief. Ive
never seen Phun with such an intense stare like this before. I figure that hes
finally calming down, but then

BANG!
Holy shit! Why did he hit the building?! If there are cracks then the
chancellor will want us to pay, you know! Im trying to make a joke out of it
in my head even though I dont find any of this funny at all. I cant see
Phuns face, but I know that hes boiling with anger. He takes in a deep
breath before he begins to say something.
Why didnt youtell me that you needed something? He asks me
without looking at my face. As usual, I dont quite understand what hes
trying to tell me.
What the heck, Phun?
Soyou dont have any faith in me, huh? He tells me before he lowers his
fist from the wall. I cant see his face so I cant tell what kind of of mood he is
in. At last, he walks away from me.
I dont have any faith in you?

***

Its been a very tiring day today. Despite the fact that I wasnt the one
running the marching band practice, I still had the responsibilities of setting
up all the band stuff. Whats more, I had to repair nearly half of the entire
instruments collection that our club members use. I spent so much time
repairing them that I think Id be able to open a repair shop after I graduated.
My watch tells me that its past 10 pm by the time I arrive home. I throw my
school bag on the bed before I lie down on my back and let out a long sigh.
What happened this afternoon with Phun is still bothering me. He told me
that I dont have any faith in himI knew exactly what he meant.
I admit that I totally screwed up by not calling him in the first place. I already
knew in my heart whod be willing to help me out the most. I admit that I
made a mistake. I hurt Phun by allowing someone else to offer a hand to help
me when it shouldve been him.
In reality, I just dont want to be a burden to Phun because I know very well
that hes someone who will help me out the most. I know very well that the

person who would happily rush over to give me the money once it is
available would be Phun. I trust him 100%. I trust him so much that I never
tried to rush him and I never even pestered him about the money. I knew
that he would never just disregard the problems I was facing.
I didnt even mean to ask Earn for help, not even for a little bit. What I talked
to him about barely qualified as asking for advice. I didnt think that hed
help me this much either (since he has his own budget issues to deal with for
his cheer team).
I really never meant for anybody to get in between Phun and me
Damn it, damn it, damn it. Its no use just laying here and obsessing over
this. Hes probably so mad at me right now. (I would be if I were him.) I
thought about this before I decide to throw off my socks and leave to get the
keys to the motorcycle right away.
Ma, Ill be right back. I totter my way down the stairs and I see my parents
watching a movie together. They wave at me as an acknowledgement so I
leave to push my trusty motorcycle and face the world together once again.
I dont get a chance to turn the ignition since I notice a pale face which
belongs to that certain jerk. Hes sitting by the potted plants near the gate
and catches me by surprise, Yo! What the hell?! What are you doing sitting
there in silence?!
Where are you off to? Phun notices that Im about to leave my house with
my motorcycle. He quickly walks up to me and asks the question. So what
am I supposed to tell him?
What about you? How come you havent gotten yourself home yet? Based
on my observations from head to toe, hes still wearing a full uniform,
complete with the white socks, a pair of leather shoes and the school bag.
Its clear that he hasnt been home yet.
I He opens his mouth to say something but falls silent. Im trying to look
into those sharp eyes of his, but he keeps averting my gaze. Phun places his
school bag on my motorcycle, it feels like hes trying to stop me from
leaving. What about you? Where are you off to?
Basically, questions are being thrown around but neither of us are answering.
-_-
I glance at his face which still has a displeased expression on it. (Why the
heck are you here if youre still mad at me?) I grab his school bag and hand it
over to him before I yank at the tall guy to get on the motorcycle. You

hungry? He shakes his head. Well, I am. Whatever, I make him get on the
back and drive off with the motorcycle blasting loud noises in the street.
***
We make our way through the empty streets of Ekamai Road (where I live) to
Thong Lo Road (where Phun lives). Arent we cool? Were not even wearing
any helmets and both of us are still wearing the school uniforms (which
dictates that we definitely do not have a drivers license) but thats okay, my
pa has connections. (Does he, really?) Haha, Im only kidding. I stop
whenever I spot a traffic police officer and their white helmet, which reminds
me of a ping pong ball. ^^
We finally escape jail time and arrive to the intersection between Thong Lo
Road and Sukhumvit Road. I decide to stop in front of a rice porridge
restaurant. I figure that it probably wont help my good looks if we were to
eat such a big meal when its already 10 pm.
If you wanna eat here then you might as well go to Oishi Buffet. He
complains with a smile when he sees the sign which says Thong Lor
Congee. I dont really care since Im loaded, hahaha. Not really. The thing is,
the daughter of the owner is pretty. I come here to eat often since I like
looking at her, heh heh.
We eat from our own bowl in silence after we placed the order. I glance at the
bastard who said that he wasnt hungry but somehow ordered a second
bowl. This is the very same bastard who complained about the price, yet
ordered some more anyway. I chuckle to myself as I watch him eat. He sees
me so he kicks my legs from under the table, whats so funny?
I guess I need to get my ears checked. I thought I heard someone said that
he wasnt hungry earlier. I make fun of him as I drink some Pepsi. I already
finished my bowl of rice porridge, but Phun is still eating his second bowl.
Yeah, I wonder how youre the president of the music club when you have
hearing problems. Oh, youre coming for me after I made a small joke?
Asshole. I return a kick under the table. He flinches and almost burns
himself with the hot congee. I cant help but laugh at him.
Youre making fucking a mess. Look at you eating like a kindergartner. Take
this, take this. I pull out a tissue and hand it over to Phun. Im not even
trying to stifle my laughter when I see him trying to clean up using the back
of his hand. He accepts the tissue while looking slightly annoyed, And whose
fault is this? Heh heh heh.

We continue eating the rice porridge (well, hes eating his and Im drinking
my Pepsi through a straw) and mess around with each other. Phun finally
shoves the last bite of congee in his mouth, This is good. Ive never been
here before. I pass by it often though. He tells me.
I hear this place is on the same street as your house. I reply sarcastically
before I quickly move my legs away since I have a feeling that hed kick me
again. Oh, didnt think youd be quick enough. Eh, I still got insulted by this
bastard somehow
I watch as Phun swallows the last bit of congee follow by big gulps of his
drink. His smile can be seen through the bottom of the clear glass. You were
gonna go see me, werent ya? Ugh, this bastard. Whyd he bring that up all
of a sudden?
I raise my brows mockingly and whistle instead of answering him. I can hear
a faint laughter which only fuels my annoyance. I really want to kick him in
the shin again.
We both sit in silence. Im not exactly looking at Phun for a long while.
Im sorry. However, the person who breaks the silence isnt me. I
immediately turn and look at him. Why is Phun apologizing to me?!
Why are you apologizing to me? The words leave my lips as quickly as I am
able to think of them. I see Phun presses his lips together tightly as if he
wants to make a long speech.
Well, Ilost my temper this afternoon. Im sorry. I probably startled you.
So what happened to you?
At this point, he lets out a big sigh. Because youwhy didnt you just
fucking tell me that you needed help? And you went to Earn instead? Who
the hell is he to you? I wouldnt have minded if someone from your club
helped you out. But Earn? Who the hell is he? Why did you have him help
you? What about me? Am I useless in your eyes? Do I mean anything to you
at all? Yikesthis guy. It seems like he had this bottled up. He goes on and
on so I pretend to hand him a glass of water since his throat might be dry.
Dont get fucking smart with me. Answer me. Jeez, Im being nice but he
says Im getting smart with him? What the hell?
I didnt mean to tell Earn about it that day. He was just asking me how the
band was doing so I was mindlessly ranting. Who couldve known that hed
drag me to an ATM to transfer the money at 8 pm? I was pretty shocked
myself.

So why didnt you tell me right when hia Pui delivered those drums? Dang.
His tone is starting to get really aggressive, everybody.
Because I knew that you were already trying your best. I believed in you
when you told me that youd get me the money so I didnt wanna pester you
about it. Youd give me the money whenever you get it. I answer him. I see
that hes smiling and seems to be pleased with my answer. But then his
expression returns to being grim, Yet you were acting all needy with Earn?
What the fuck? I wasnt. I really needed to kick him in the shin once more.
Ive had it.
He laughs as he tries to dodge (but fails) before he gets up and pulls out his
wallet. My treat. Auntie, check please. He mutters the first part to me
softly before he raises a finger to get the owners attention. I stand up too,
then I follow him outside.
Seeing his broad back in front of me makes me want to say something too.
Imsorry too. I didnt mean to hurt your feelings.
That wide grin from Phun is what I wanted the most. I smile back at him
before he reaches his arm over my shoulders so we can walk together.
***
The two of us ride the motorcycle in the dark, passing through plenty of cars
which are likely filled with those that enjoy the nightlife, before we finally
arrive at a huge mansions gate. (We had to stop to avoid police officers
occasionally.) I can see that the lights are still on in some of the rooms even
though it is nearly midnight now.
Did you tell anybody that youd be home late? I ask him as I park the
motorcycle.
I did. I told Pang Id be out with you. Heh heh.
You always cause troubles for me! This bastard! I swing my leg, intending
to kick his ass while he gets off the motorcycle. However, he manages to
dodge it and laughs at me.
See ya around. Never mind, I guess. I wave goodbye to him before I
prepare to leave. I wouldve made it to the main street by now if he hadnt
called out my name.

Noh
Whats up? I pause and turn around. I dont hear an answer from him. Phun
walks closer to me. I stare at his hands as he reaches around my neck
intending to do something. What the hell are you doing?
Just stay still. His hands move about around my neck for a while. I finally
realize what is going on when the dog tag has been removed from my neck.
Arent you ashamed of wearing something that belongs to the cheer team?
He tells me and I actually agree with him. Yes, I am. I forgot to take it off. I
was so busy. Thanks for reminding me. I tell him as I reach my hand over to
take the dog tag that Earn put on me this afternoon, but Phun drops it in his
shirt pocket instead. This bastard is such a smartass.
Ill give it back to Earn myself. Thatll look bad though! My mouth is agape
from not understanding him.
Ill return it myself. Thus, The War of the Dog Tag has commenced. I lean
over intending to grab the necklace but he dodges me and pushes me in the
head. This jerk, does he think that that he can do whatever he wants
because hes taller than me?!
You can never say no to people. Youll just keep wearing it if he pressures
you to. Ill return it. He tells me while he pats his pocket to let me know that
he is not giving it back to me. Hes right though, now that I think about it. I
really dont put up much of a fight. When somebody practically forces me to
do something, I usually give in to them. I mean, look at Phun for example.
This is how I got myself into this situation in the first place.
Alright, Ill leave it up to you then.
And dont go accepting stuff from random people. Especially from Earn.
What Phun is telling me makes me feel peculiar. Its almost likehes more
upset at the fact that I accepted the dog tag from Earn rather than the fact
that I accepted a dog tag that rightfully belongs to the cheer team.
Phun I softly call out his name. He turns to look at me.
Whats up? His reply is so gentle that Im finding it difficult to speak.
We dont actually belong to one another, you know
Even though I was the one who said those words, I cant help but feel a
tightness in my chest. What about Phun then? This probably affects him even
more than it does me.

Nevertheless, I have to keep saying these things. We both need to remind

ourselves about this as often as possible. The truth isIm only telling myself
this so Id be able to cope with the fact that there is no us.
A small lonesome smile curls around Phuns lips before he walks closer to
me. He looks at me while he reaches over and gently caresses my cheek.
Just because we talked about itit doesnt mean Id be able to get over you
right then and there. He looks into my eyes while giving me a smile. I cant
help but wonder, would it be too much if we continue being just friends like
this?
Before I am able to say another word, Phuns familiar face moves closer to
mine. I can feel his breaths. I tense up and close my eyes tightly. I feel
something soft and plump but full of warmth touching my forehead. This
lasts for a moment before he pulls away.
I mockingly raise one of my brows in order to hide my embarrassment.
Probably the most wed be able to do, heh heh.
Still better than nothing Phun tells me before he gives me a wave which
tells me that hes about to head inside his home. Drive safe, okay?
Yeah. See you.
I dont know what these feelings of sharp pains that are filling up inside me
really mean.
I honestly dont know.

CHAPTER 22: THE THING WE CAN

Its morning and were even closer to the tournament now. Im pacing back
and forth while staring at my own shoes in front of the student council office.
Im not sure if I should just open the door and enter. Would that be too weird?
I keep pondering over and over while circling in this area to the point where
Im starting to get dizzy. I dont think I should keep doing this unless I want to
leave a small present on the floor of this building. Butwhy am I pacing back
and forth like this anyway?
I scold myself for a while before I decide to pull out my cellphone and stare
at the screen. Well, I need to speak to Phun about the budget issues that we
talked about, otherwise Id be in trouble. What should I do? Should I just call
him instead? But
I secretly kinda wanna see him
Wait! What am I even thinking?! This is so dumb! I hit my own head with my
knuckles heavily for having such an appropriate thought about someone
elses boyfriend. I decide to dial Phuns number and hit call.
Its wonderful enough that we are friends
Even though we can only be in the same vicinity
That person probably wont mind
It cant be helped that you fell in love with that person first
I keep having to hide everything
So that you cannot see them from my eyes
Jeezwhat the fuck is with this ringback tone of his? I immediately shove my
phone away from my ear when I hear the lyrics. (Who sings this? Ive never
heard of it.) I only had a short amount of time to wonder before I hear Phuns
deep voice on the other line.
Yes, Noh?
Dont be so damn polite! Youre making me feel weird!
Wherethe hell are you?
At the student council office. Where are you? Should I go and find you?
Hes such a willing participant. I chuckle into my phone before I glance up to
read the sign on top of the student council office. See you in half a second.
It really was half a second before I pushed the door and entered the room the
moment I hung up. Phun is stunned to see me. (Hes still holding his phone

up to his ear, heh heh.) However, hes not alone in the office. I forgot that
this isnt actually his personal office. Theres Fi (the student council
president), Bank (I dont know his title), two 10th graders, andEarn, the
president of the cheer team. Theyre all staring at me.
Eh? Noh! What are you doing here? Earn greets me before anyone else.
There is a small smile on Phuns face as he puts his cellphone away. Why
didnt you just come in? Heh heh heh. I guess Earn knows why Im here now
that he hears Phuns question.
I mockingly shrug at Phun before I turn to smile at Earn who appears to be
counting items from a huge pile. Well, I guess my meddlesome genes is
activating. Whats that, Earn?! That bag is freaking huge!
Souvenirs for the guys that will be on the stands. He answers me with a
small grin as he shows one off to me. This year, the memento is a silver dog
tag with our schools name on it. In the back, theres an engraved text which
reads, ALL IS ONE. Its so freaking pretty!
That is sooooo freaking coooool! I want one! Can I get one if there are
leftovers? I jump at the dog tags once I see them since I want one very
badly. (So freaking much.) Earn breaks out in laughter, probably because Im
clinging to his arm like a kitten.
Why the hell is Phun clearing this throat anyway? I guess hes getting sick
again.
Ya dont need to wait for the leftovers, Noh. Earn tells me out of the blue.
As usual, I dont quite understand what he means. I let go of his arm when I
notice that hes rummaging through the the bag.
Ill give ya one now. Not only he tells me this, but he hands me a dog tag
too. My eyes are almost as wide as when he offered to let me borrow the
money. Even though Im pretty excited, I still do have some conscience left in
me.
What? I cant take that! I quickly avoid the president of the cheer teams
hands which are about to put the dog tag around my neck. Im causing a
loud ruckus over not accepting it.
Yo! Those belong to the underclassmen working on the stands! I should wait
and if there are any leftovers then Ill take one. Itll look awful otherwise,
man. I mean what I say. Its true that I do get a souvenir meant for the
cheer team participants every soccer tournament, but every single time
theyre leftovers after all the participants had received theirs. Those
mementos are gifts for the junior high students who gave up their free time

and were willing to work with the seniors. (Not to mention getting scolded at
plenty of times.) Theyre not meant for the upperclassmen to give around to
one another like this.
However, it seems that Earn doesnt care since he shrugs me off. Whatever,
therell be leftovers anyway. Im giving you one now so someone else cant
take yours. Hes still trying to put the dog tag around my neck. Jeez! No
matter which way Im trying to dodge him, I just cant get away from Earn
who is as big as a bull.
I dont waaaaaant ittttttt.
Nope, this one is considered given away. Im not taking it back. He
forcefully puts the dog tag around my neck with a wide grin on his face. I feel
the dog tag with my fingers in a daze, it feels like Im being forced into a
situation once again.
Ill be right back, Fi Oh! That was Phuns voice! I almost forgot the reason
Im here! I quickly turn around to face Phun but he avoids my gaze. That jerk.
He promptly makes his way out of the office. Dang it, dang it, dang it!
Ill get you for this next time, Earn! Ill be right back!

***

Phun! Phun! Phun! Damn it, Phun! Fuck, Im exhausted! He races away
from me. Its bad enough with those long legs of his but hes moving pretty
fast too. Its like Im chasing down a loose buffalo. Dont you feel bad for the
person chasing after you?! Its not like I exercise regularly! Dont you know
how tiring this is?
Hey, I came to ask you about my clubs budget! Im just going to yell since
I cant catch up to him. I thought, while I shout down the path near the
building that is usually pretty empty. It worked. Phun stops in his track and
gives me an opportunity to catch up to him. Hes still refusing to face me
though.
Whats the matter? Youre acting weird. Are you sick? I reach over to take
his temperature with the back of my hand by placing it on his neck. (Actually,
I dont know how hot or cold its supposed to feel like. Im only doing this just
because thats what people do in this situation.) But I notice that Phun

quickly dodges me by leaning away before he finally turns around to face

me.
What about the budget? Im still trying to help. Sorry. Phun looks so guilty
that I need to pat him on the shoulder to comfort him. At any rate, I feel
better hearing him saying that. I know that he is someone thatll help me no
matter what. I dont regret having faith in him. I only came by to ask just to
be sure, that was all.
Are you in a rush? Phun asks me again. I start to feel awkward. Its like my
lips arent moving the way I want them to. So, how should I answer him?
WellI was at first. Hia Pui delivered the drums yesterday and he wanted
the money by the end of the week. But nowwellIm still in a hurry just not
as much anymore. That didnt make a lot of sense, did it? Im just as
confused.
What does that mean? So do you need the money by the end of this week?
If you do then take mine. Jeez. Our school is filled with rich dudes, is that
it?!
Its okay, its okay. I ran into Earn yesterday and he helped transferred the
money. I just need topay him back. I dont want to be in his debt for too
long, I feel bad about it. My voice is weakening as I explain this to Phun. I
also notice that his expression is changing.
Youtold Earn about this?
YeahI ran into him yesterday evening.
And you talked to him about your budget issues?
YeahI was just looking for some advice.
Advice? At this point, Im beginning to get annoyed by all these questions.
What the hell is up with you? Why are you interrogating me about this?! As
usual, I yell at him. However, he quickly turns and stare at my face. I can feel
my entire body shrinking to the size of a tennis ball.
How come he looks so scary? T__T
I flinch a little since Phun has such a mean expression on his face. I slowly
take steps backward because the person in front of me is moving closer to
me. Eventually, I can feel that there is a wall directly behind me.

AhI dont have any space left to flee. Is he gonna kill me and bury me
under concrete to get rid of all evidence? T__T
A hoarse noise leaves from Phuns throat. It is like its coming from someone
trying very hard not to raise their voice.
You Me? Me what?
I stare back at him while he locks his eyes with mine. A moment later, he is
the one that turns his face away. I cant help but let out a sigh of relief. Ive
never seen Phun with such an intense stare like this before. I figure that hes
finally calming down, but then
BANG!
Holy shit! Why did he hit the building?! If there are cracks then the
chancellor will want us to pay, you know! Im trying to make a joke out of it
in my head even though I dont find any of this funny at all. I cant see
Phuns face, but I know that hes boiling with anger. He takes in a deep
breath before he begins to say something.
Why didnt youtell me that you needed something? He asks me
without looking at my face. As usual, I dont quite understand what hes
trying to tell me.
What the heck, Phun?
Soyou dont have any faith in me, huh? He tells me before he lowers his
fist from the wall. I cant see his face so I cant tell what kind of of mood he is
in. At last, he walks away from me.
I dont have any faith in you?

***

Its been a very tiring day today. Despite the fact that I wasnt the one
running the marching band practice, I still had the responsibilities of setting
up all the band stuff. Whats more, I had to repair nearly half of the entire
instruments collection that our club members use. I spent so much time
repairing them that I think Id be able to open a repair shop after I graduated.

My watch tells me that its past 10 pm by the time I arrive home. I throw my
school bag on the bed before I lie down on my back and let out a long sigh.
What happened this afternoon with Phun is still bothering me. He told me
that I dont have any faith in himI knew exactly what he meant.
I admit that I totally screwed up by not calling him in the first place. I already
knew in my heart whod be willing to help me out the most. I admit that I
made a mistake. I hurt Phun by allowing someone else to offer a hand to help
me when it shouldve been him.
In reality, I just dont want to be a burden to Phun because I know very well
that hes someone who will help me out the most. I know very well that the
person who would happily rush over to give me the money once it is
available would be Phun. I trust him 100%. I trust him so much that I never
tried to rush him and I never even pestered him about the money. I knew
that he would never just disregard the problems I was facing.
I didnt even mean to ask Earn for help, not even for a little bit. What I talked
to him about barely qualified as asking for advice. I didnt think that hed
help me this much either (since he has his own budget issues to deal with for
his cheer team).
I really never meant for anybody to get in between Phun and me
Damn it, damn it, damn it. Its no use just laying here and obsessing over
this. Hes probably so mad at me right now. (I would be if I were him.) I
thought about this before I decide to throw off my socks and leave to get the
keys to the motorcycle right away.
Ma, Ill be right back. I totter my way down the stairs and I see my parents
watching a movie together. They wave at me as an acknowledgement so I
leave to push my trusty motorcycle and face the world together once again.
I dont get a chance to turn the ignition since I notice a pale face which
belongs to that certain jerk. Hes sitting by the potted plants near the gate
and catches me by surprise, Yo! What the hell?! What are you doing sitting
there in silence?!
Where are you off to? Phun notices that Im about to leave my house with
my motorcycle. He quickly walks up to me and asks the question. So what
am I supposed to tell him?
What about you? How come you havent gotten yourself home yet? Based
on my observations from head to toe, hes still wearing a full uniform,

complete with the white socks, a pair of leather shoes and the school bag.
Its clear that he hasnt been home yet.
I He opens his mouth to say something but falls silent. Im trying to look
into those sharp eyes of his, but he keeps averting my gaze. Phun places his
school bag on my motorcycle, it feels like hes trying to stop me from
leaving. What about you? Where are you off to?
Basically, questions are being thrown around but neither of us are answering.
-_-
I glance at his face which still has a displeased expression on it. (Why the
heck are you here if youre still mad at me?) I grab his school bag and hand it
over to him before I yank at the tall guy to get on the motorcycle. You
hungry? He shakes his head. Well, I am. Whatever, I make him get on the
back and drive off with the motorcycle blasting loud noises in the street.
***
We make our way through the empty streets of Ekamai Road (where I live) to
Thong Lo Road (where Phun lives). Arent we cool? Were not even wearing
any helmets and both of us are still wearing the school uniforms (which
dictates that we definitely do not have a drivers license) but thats okay, my
pa has connections. (Does he, really?) Haha, Im only kidding. I stop
whenever I spot a traffic police officer and their white helmet, which reminds
me of a ping pong ball. ^^
We finally escape jail time and arrive to the intersection between Thong Lo
Road and Sukhumvit Road. I decide to stop in front of a rice porridge
restaurant. I figure that it probably wont help my good looks if we were to
eat such a big meal when its already 10 pm.
If you wanna eat here then you might as well go to Oishi Buffet. He
complains with a smile when he sees the sign which says Thong Lor
Congee. I dont really care since Im loaded, hahaha. Not really. The thing is,
the daughter of the owner is pretty. I come here to eat often since I like
looking at her, heh heh.
We eat from our own bowl in silence after we placed the order. I glance at the
bastard who said that he wasnt hungry but somehow ordered a second
bowl. This is the very same bastard who complained about the price, yet
ordered some more anyway. I chuckle to myself as I watch him eat. He sees
me so he kicks my legs from under the table, whats so funny?
I guess I need to get my ears checked. I thought I heard someone said that
he wasnt hungry earlier. I make fun of him as I drink some Pepsi. I already

finished my bowl of rice porridge, but Phun is still eating his second bowl.
Yeah, I wonder how youre the president of the music club when you have
hearing problems. Oh, youre coming for me after I made a small joke?
Asshole. I return a kick under the table. He flinches and almost burns
himself with the hot congee. I cant help but laugh at him.
Youre making fucking a mess. Look at you eating like a kindergartner. Take
this, take this. I pull out a tissue and hand it over to Phun. Im not even
trying to stifle my laughter when I see him trying to clean up using the back
of his hand. He accepts the tissue while looking slightly annoyed, And whose
fault is this? Heh heh heh.
We continue eating the rice porridge (well, hes eating his and Im drinking
my Pepsi through a straw) and mess around with each other. Phun finally
shoves the last bite of congee in his mouth, This is good. Ive never been
here before. I pass by it often though. He tells me.
I hear this place is on the same street as your house. I reply sarcastically
before I quickly move my legs away since I have a feeling that hed kick me
again. Oh, didnt think youd be quick enough. Eh, I still got insulted by this
bastard somehow
I watch as Phun swallows the last bit of congee follow by big gulps of his
drink. His smile can be seen through the bottom of the clear glass. You were
gonna go see me, werent ya? Ugh, this bastard. Whyd he bring that up all
of a sudden?
I raise my brows mockingly and whistle instead of answering him. I can hear
a faint laughter which only fuels my annoyance. I really want to kick him in
the shin again.
We both sit in silence. Im not exactly looking at Phun for a long while.
Im sorry. However, the person who breaks the silence isnt me. I
immediately turn and look at him. Why is Phun apologizing to me?!
Why are you apologizing to me? The words leave my lips as quickly as I am
able to think of them. I see Phun presses his lips together tightly as if he
wants to make a long speech.
Well, Ilost my temper this afternoon. Im sorry. I probably startled you.
So what happened to you?

At this point, he lets out a big sigh. Because youwhy didnt you just
fucking tell me that you needed help? And you went to Earn instead? Who
the hell is he to you? I wouldnt have minded if someone from your club
helped you out. But Earn? Who the hell is he? Why did you have him help
you? What about me? Am I useless in your eyes? Do I mean anything to you
at all? Yikesthis guy. It seems like he had this bottled up. He goes on and
on so I pretend to hand him a glass of water since his throat might be dry.
Dont get fucking smart with me. Answer me. Jeez, Im being nice but he
says Im getting smart with him? What the hell?
I didnt mean to tell Earn about it that day. He was just asking me how the
band was doing so I was mindlessly ranting. Who couldve known that hed
drag me to an ATM to transfer the money at 8 pm? I was pretty shocked
myself.
So why didnt you tell me right when hia Pui delivered those drums? Dang.
His tone is starting to get really aggressive, everybody.
Because I knew that you were already trying your best. I believed in you
when you told me that youd get me the money so I didnt wanna pester you
about it. Youd give me the money whenever you get it. I answer him. I see
that hes smiling and seems to be pleased with my answer. But then his
expression returns to being grim, Yet you were acting all needy with Earn?
What the fuck? I wasnt. I really needed to kick him in the shin once more.
Ive had it.
He laughs as he tries to dodge (but fails) before he gets up and pulls out his
wallet. My treat. Auntie, check please. He mutters the first part to me
softly before he raises a finger to get the owners attention. I stand up too,
then I follow him outside.
Seeing his broad back in front of me makes me want to say something too.
Imsorry too. I didnt mean to hurt your feelings.
That wide grin from Phun is what I wanted the most. I smile back at him
before he reaches his arm over my shoulders so we can walk together.
***
The two of us ride the motorcycle in the dark, passing through plenty of cars
which are likely filled with those that enjoy the nightlife, before we finally
arrive at a huge mansions gate. (We had to stop to avoid police officers
occasionally.) I can see that the lights are still on in some of the rooms even
though it is nearly midnight now.

Did you tell anybody that youd be home late? I ask him as I park the
motorcycle.
I did. I told Pang Id be out with you. Heh heh.
You always cause troubles for me! This bastard! I swing my leg, intending
to kick his ass while he gets off the motorcycle. However, he manages to
dodge it and laughs at me.
See ya around. Never mind, I guess. I wave goodbye to him before I
prepare to leave. I wouldve made it to the main street by now if he hadnt
called out my name.
Noh
Whats up? I pause and turn around. I dont hear an answer from him. Phun
walks closer to me. I stare at his hands as he reaches around my neck
intending to do something. What the hell are you doing?
Just stay still. His hands move about around my neck for a while. I finally
realize what is going on when the dog tag has been removed from my neck.
Arent you ashamed of wearing something that belongs to the cheer team?
He tells me and I actually agree with him. Yes, I am. I forgot to take it off. I
was so busy. Thanks for reminding me. I tell him as I reach my hand over to
take the dog tag that Earn put on me this afternoon, but Phun drops it in his
shirt pocket instead. This bastard is such a smartass.
Ill give it back to Earn myself. Thatll look bad though! My mouth is agape
from not understanding him.
Ill return it myself. Thus, The War of the Dog Tag has commenced. I lean
over intending to grab the necklace but he dodges me and pushes me in the
head. This jerk, does he think that that he can do whatever he wants
because hes taller than me?!
You can never say no to people. Youll just keep wearing it if he pressures
you to. Ill return it. He tells me while he pats his pocket to let me know that
he is not giving it back to me. Hes right though, now that I think about it. I
really dont put up much of a fight. When somebody practically forces me to
do something, I usually give in to them. I mean, look at Phun for example.
This is how I got myself into this situation in the first place.
Alright, Ill leave it up to you then.

And dont go accepting stuff from random people. Especially from Earn.
What Phun is telling me makes me feel peculiar. Its almost likehes more
upset at the fact that I accepted the dog tag from Earn rather than the fact
that I accepted a dog tag that rightfully belongs to the cheer team.
Phun I softly call out his name. He turns to look at me.
Whats up? His reply is so gentle that Im finding it difficult to speak.
We dont actually belong to one another, you know
Even though I was the one who said those words, I cant help but feel a
tightness in my chest. What about Phun then? This probably affects him even
more than it does me.
Nevertheless, I have to keep saying these things. We both need to remind
ourselves about this as often as possible. The truth isIm only telling myself
this so Id be able to cope with the fact that there is no us.
A small lonesome smile curls around Phuns lips before he walks closer to
me. He looks at me while he reaches over and gently caresses my cheek.
Just because we talked about itit doesnt mean Id be able to get over you
right then and there. He looks into my eyes while giving me a smile. I cant
help but wonder, would it be too much if we continue being just friends like
this?
Before I am able to say another word, Phuns familiar face moves closer to
mine. I can feel his breaths. I tense up and close my eyes tightly. I feel
something soft and plump but full of warmth touching my forehead. This
lasts for a moment before he pulls away.
I mockingly raise one of my brows in order to hide my embarrassment.
Probably the most wed be able to do, heh heh.
Still better than nothing Phun tells me before he gives me a wave which
tells me that hes about to head inside his home. Drive safe, okay?
Yeah. See you.
I dont know what these feelings of sharp pains that are filling up inside me
really mean.
I honestly dont know.

CHAPTER 23: GREATEST DAY

Finally, the soccer tournament has arrived. You think that all those practices
were tiring? The real day was even worse. I didnt get to sleep last night
since I was so busy with the uniforms, taking care of the instruments and a
bunch of other things. I took a nap around 2 in the morning, but then Om
kicked me and woke me up at exactly 2:25 am because there was a problem
with a horn. What in the holy hell? I fixed this piece of crap just the other day.
Maybe it is time to buy a new one. Basically, Ive only had 25 minutes worth
of sleep before I needed to drag my exhausted and barely functioning body
to Suphachalasai Stadium, even before the roosters are awake.
The morning sun was shining at us with no mercy, several of the
underclassmen marching band members had fainted. I had to rush and grab
the first aid kit that we fortunately brought along with us. So I ended up
holding a walkie-talkie in one hand and the first aid kit in the other.
Nevertheless, I constantly needed to fix some of the instruments that broke
down. Occasionally, when we were in dire need of something, I had to ask
some of the underclassmen who were free to run to Siam and buy them. It
has been a chaotic day so far.
Yo! Dont faint! Dont faint! Here we go again. I quickly turn and catch nong
Ae, the clarinet player, whose face is completely void of any blood. I grab a
wet towel and dab his pale face. Not only I need to make sure these guys
stay alive, I also need to keep an ear out and reply to the messages from the
walkie-talkie every now and then. Im getting pretty dizzy myself.
Bank to Noh. Is the band ready? I flinch when I hear my name from the
headphones. I hastily reply back.
Noh replying to Bank. Were ready.
Then please get into position. Here goes nothing. Fighting. I pat the band
members on the back to get their attention so they would get up before I try
to reach Film via the walkie-talkie. He seems to have disappeared on us.
Noh to Film. Please get into your position. Im about to send the band over.
Film replying to Noh. Yes. I am on my way. I bet he was checking out the
girls here. I shake my head before I walk over to lead the underclassmen to
where theyre supposed to be. But then, I hear a voice calling out my name
from the walkie-talkie.

Earn to Noh. Dont forget that we made plans, okay? Eh, this bastard.
Where the heck did he come from? I stare at the walkie-talkie with a puzzled
look before I reply.
Noh replying to Earn. Yeah, just lemme finish up first.
The walkie-talkie goes silent momentarily before somebody else says
something. Please dont play around with the walkie-talkie. I couldnt help
but let out a laughter. The underclassmen nearby turn to look at me with
confusion in their faces.
Heh, that was Phuns voice.

***

The marching band begins to walk into the stadium, which means that my
job here is done and I no longer need to stick around (because Film and Om
are already taking care of the rest). My new job, however, is rushing to the
area under the stands and check the monitors to see whether everything is
going smoothly or not and report to Film.
I half walk and half run to under the stands area. I notice different staff
members from various departments, such as the cheer team, the technical
team, and the design team all wearing the jumpsuit and busily working away.
I wave at Mark, who is part of the design team. He has an anxious look on his
face as he tries to make changes to the stands layout. He still has the time to
wave back at me. (Seriously?) Nearby, I see Mo, who is working in the
technical department today, having a seemingly stressful discussion with the
welfare members. There are some sort of blueprints in their hands. Everyone
seems to be very occupied.
I search around for a monitor that would be able to help me. I didnt need to
idle for too long when a 10th grader waves me over. This one, p!
I smile and run over to have a seat next to him. I watch as the band and the
troops march inside the stadium. To be honest, Im not exactly paying
attention to the monitor since Im too busy talking to Paeng about PangYa.
(Film and Om can never find out about this.)
As expected, I spot Phuns back for a short moment. He is wearing the
jumpsuit and is working nearby. (Hes working in the technical department, I
just found that out when I saw him wearing the uniform.) However, Im not

really paying any attention to him since Im too preoccupied with my

discussion with nong Paeng. Well, at least I was until he went quiet.
What is it, pPhun? Wah? What the hell? I instantly turn around to look
when I heard nong Paengs voice. Phun Phumipat is rudely crouching down
behind me even though hes still wearing his own set of huge headphones.
Can I sit there? Lets trade places, he tells nong Paeng. I really wanted to
smack him in the head. Paeng obviously gives up his seat since Phun is
abusing his seniority power. Heh heh heh. He still has the nerves to flash a
big smile before he takes off his headphone and passes it to the
underclassman, Take this too. Earn is giving out orders on channel 2.
Where I come from, we call this shrugging off your own responsibilities to
other people.
Is he gonna be able to do that though? I whisper a question to Phun.
However, he gives me a relaxed smile before he puts nong Phaengs
headphones on. Now, hes listening to channel 11 just like I am. Of course,
dont underestimate him.
Phun says as he presses some buttons on the keyboard to change the
camera angles in order to get a clearer feed of the marching band, I know
you better anyway.
Quit running your mouth off I tell him off but I cant help but smile to
myself since the feed is clearer now. Im letting Film know through the
walkie-talkie when I notice any mistakes or problems.
Soon enough, the troops and the last member of the marching band exit the
stadium. I let out a huge sigh of relief because everything went smoothly.
Well, aside from Ngoi who played the flute in a wrong key twice. I should kick
his ass later.
Sighhhhh.
So youre all done for the day, right? Phun asks me as he switches the
monitor back to the cheer stands like before. I dont know how to answer him
since technically, I am finished but Im kind of also not finished. I still gotta
go see Earn.
Right, what did he mean by what he said earlier? Phun takes the
opportunity to ask me. I stretch before I answer him, He helped out with my
clubs budget problem, remember? He asked me if I could share some of the
beverages from the marching band to the stands since no one helps him with
getting anything to drink at all. I finished and was about to get up to do just
as I told Phun but he pulls me back to sit down. Then you dont need to go.

Why the hell not?

I furrow my brows at Phun who is grinning at the monitor as the cheer stands
spell something obnoxious. However, I feel like Phun is the one being way
more obnoxious right now. Well, Ialready paid him back. And I returned
the dog tag too, he gives me a quick answer before he speaks into the
walkie-talkie. Monitor to Cheer team. S-30 is incorrect, please take care of
that.
Hold up! Were not done talking about this yet! I pull on his sleeves so that
he is unable to keep typing on the keyboard. Yeah, we are. Phun argues as
he laughs before going back to adjusting the camera angles.
What the hell? You returned the money already? The school gave the money
for our club already?
Not yet.
Then how did you return the money to him?
Not telling you. Monitor to Cheer team. Check E-14 please. This jerk
continues to avoid the subject. I wrinkle my nose at him (even though he
isnt looking at me) before I pick my butt up to walk away. I still need to go. I
already promised him.
And thats the second time he pulls me back down to the seat. Oh sure,
youre quick when it comes to this stuff. You know how to handle this
monitor, right? Phun asks me. I nod, although I dont entirely understand his
point.
Wanna wear the jumpsuit? But now Im not sure whether I should nod even
though Im dying to wear one on the inside. I stare at him with my brows
furrowed.
Dont look so confused. I know that you wanna. Follow me. Tle, can you take
care of this for a bit? Be right back, he says as he drags me along with him.
What the hell is he up to?!

***

We stop at where the cheerleaders change their clothes. The area is

currently empty because theyre already on standby at the entrance. I stand
here with a puzzled look on my face as I watch him lowering the zipper of his
jumpsuit.
Yo! Yo! Yo! Yo! Yo! Yo! Yo! What the hell are you doing?! Is he gonna force
himself on me right here?! No way! The floor is too hard! Wait! I mean, I
wont let him!
He ignores my protest and continues to strip from his jumpsuit. I keep my
eyes tightly shut because I dont want to see anything obscene. I can hear
the sound of clothes being removed nonstop.
After a little while, I feel something thrown on my shoulder. I open one of my
eyes to see Phun standing there in a white t-shirt and a pair of boxers. He
grins and shakes his head as if he wants to laugh at me. Lets trade. Give
me your clothes. Jeezthats easy for you to say. You had the jumpsuit on
which meant that you were wearing a full outfit underneath. But all Im
wearing is a t-shirt and jeans and nothing else!
Fuck off. No way, I dont wanna wear one anymore.
But I already took it off. Come on! We shouldnt leave Tle with a bunch of
things to do by himself for too long.
I hesitate a bit before I point my finger at him. Then turn around! How is
what I said funny? Why is he laughing so hard?
What are you being so shy for? We.are both guys. I bet he was thinking
of something else during that long pause before he says are both guys. This
bastard! Sure, I normally give in to people easily, but not this time! Im still
pointing at him, telling him to turn around.
He chuckles, Are you gonna take off every single piece of clothing or
something? Just give me your jeans to wear would be enough. I got my own
shirt. You should wear your shirt under the jumpsuit otherwise you might get
itchy, ya know. Oh, right. Why am I so stupid? I stare at the jumpsuit with
some confusion before I decide to take my jeans off (I still have my own
boxers on) and throw it to Phun. So now were wearing clothes that dont
belong to us.
I look at the khaki jumpsuit that I have on, feeling completely elated. Despite
the fact that it says techque instead of swasdikarn that Ive dreamed of, I
still think this looks insanely cool. Im not giving this back to you, I threaten
him.

Sure, if youd be shameless enough to wear it home then go ahead, he

tells me before he leads me out of the changing area.
I head back to the monitors area while smiling to Nheng, who is is looking a
bit dumbfounded since Phun was the one who left but I showed up instead.
Heh heh. I can handle this, you know. Overseeing the monitors and stuff,
trust me.
I swing my neck a little for some relief before I pick up the headphone that
was left on the floor and put them on my head. I press a button and watch as
Earn smiles as he gives instructions to some underclassmen. And there he is.
Phun is walking with a drink in his hand.
I cant help but let out a roar of laughter when I see a shocked expression on
Earns face when he realizes that Phun is giving him the drink instead of me.
He quickly yells through channel 11 of the walkie-talkie about how I tricked
him. I can hear Phuns laughter in the background. Im finding this pretty
funny myself, (haha) but I refrain from laughing since I would get yelled at. I
simply apologize to him before I turn my attention back to monitoring things
on the stand for the design team.
Time is passing by pretty quickly. There are a lot of loud commotions
breaking out constantly from the game that is going on in the field and also
from the stands with different words being spelled throughout the match.
Several close goals are nearly successful which only fuels the atmosphere.
The cheer team on the stands continue to change letters in order to reply to
the competitors. Each alumni are being as loud as the students who are still
attending the school. I cant help but feel the excitement along with them as
I watch the monitor. (I see everything that is going on.)
Ive taken over Phuns jobs of monitoring the feeds and taking care of other
equipment. There were a lot of problems and I ended up needing to walk
over to the stands and spoke face-to-face with other staff member since
there were so many people using the walkie-talkie. Sometimes it was difficult
to know who was actually talking. It was simpler just to walk over and speak
to them. Every time I showed my face near the stand, Earn would make a
sour face at me. Other friends around him were even laughing at him.
Meanwhile, Phun continued being obnoxious with him by feeding him and
forcinh Earn to drink stuff. It seemed like he was trying to take care of Earn
but it felt like it was annoying Earn more than anything else. This eventually
turned into a joke for the people working in the stands area. (Haha) I
chuckled along with this relaxed atmosphere that we had going. Even though
it was exhausting, having a bunch of friends working together to achieve a
goal like this only inspired me to work even harder.

Phun continued to volunteer to be Earns personal caretaker for the duration

of the event. However, he still had some time to check up on me every now
and then too. Every time he came to see me, he brought along a drink and
some snacks with him. I couldnt help but wonder if he forced someone to go
out and buy them from Siam because I very much doubted that they were
handing out breads from Bread Papas, a delicious bakery from Paragon, to
the stand members. (If they were, then Earn mightve spent way too much
money on that.) I shook my head at his coyness since he denied ever buying
them for me no matter how many time I asked him. He insisted that these
came from the stands. He mustve thought I was so naive. Anyhow, I didnt
bother arguing with him. The breads were yummy.
Aside from all the drinks and all the breads, Phun constantly kept asking me
how I was doing or whether I was getting tired. He even asked if I wanted to
trade our outfits back but I was too lazy to do it. So I pretty much told him
that I was doing okay every time he asked me. Finally, the sky has turned
dark and a screaming roar erupted in the stadium. Our team made a goal
against the opponents team. They were able to keep the score at 1-0 for the
rest of the match. The numbers were brightly lit on the scoreboard as proofs
for our long awaited victory!
All of my friends and I took off the headphones and jumped around in
celebration. We ran around and caused chaos in the area under the stands
before we rushed over to party with the rest of the students on the soccer
field. We sang our lungs out, be it the cheer songs and our school anthem,
while we grouped up and held everybody by their necks and shoulders. It
was so exciting that I couldnt put into words. All my fatigues went away the
moment I witnessed what our combined efforts had accomplished. I saw a lot
of my friends with tears rolling down their cheeks. I even noticed Phun
Phumipats face with traces of tears that were recently wiped away.
Master Buncha told us to get together and yell out a cheer. We held one
another over the shoulders and let out loud rumbles. I promised myself that I
would never forget this greatest day.

***

After the game ended, the students from each school are still hanging out
inside the stadium for a long while to congratulate a job well done to
everyone. (Not to mention that we won) Truthfully, I still wouldve enjoyed
this moment whether we win or lose because I got a chance to meet so
many new friends. I said my goodbyes to a group of new friends who were

sitting on the stands just now. (They wear black shorts, hehe.) They all came
over to congratulate us after the match ended. Talk about having the spirits
of an athlete and being such a good sport. No matter who won or lost, we
formed new friendships from this tournament. No shorts colors or a school
fence could get between us. ^___^
While I was speaking with an alumnus who ran over to congratulate me,
(Hey, Im not even a soccer player. Why do they keep congratulating me
anyway?) I hear an awfully familiar voice interrupting the conversation
coming from behind me.
Noh! It took me forever to find you! Ah! I dont even need to turn around to
know who this is. I begin to wonder of Yuri secretly installed a GPRS on me or
something. How did she even find me in the middle of this massive crowd of
people? -_-
Gee, Noh. When did you get such a cute girlfriend? Anyway, Ill see you
later. Im made plans to visit to the school next week, pMote the alumnus
gave me a playful smile and cut our conversation short. So now what do I
do? I dont have any other choice other than to return a smile and wave
goodbye. See you around, p. ^^;;;;
Now that pMote is leaving, its time to deal with this tiny woman standing
next to me. You were looking for me? Is there something you wanted to tell
me?
Of course, but I didnt know that youre on the stand team staff! I knew she
would notice because Yuri knows that I work with the marching band (whose
lack of uniform includes a shirt and a pair of jeans) and that I dont actually
work at the stands. I wasnt supposed to be wearing this overly large
jumpsuit at all. Even though I knew that the question would come up, I still
feel weird having to answer Yuris question.
Its Phuns. We traded. Yuri gives me a wide grin which sends shivers down
my spine.
Did I say something wrong?!
Her adorable smile lasts for a short moment before she clings onto my arm.
Lets go have dinner. Here we go again. I glance at her pale face which is
giving me a pleading expression. I suddenly feel very apprehensive about
this.
What now? I stare at Yuris face as I listen to my friends begin to make plans
to go celebrate tonight.

CHAPTER 24: INQUIRED

Sowe end up at this place anyway. I settle in my seat before I take a look
around the fancy restaurant. This place is near Ekamai Road, which is where
my house is. I heard from Yuri so many times that she wanted to eat here,
but we never had a chance to (since this restaurant only opens at night). She
finally gets a what she wanted this time around since she was the one who
picked this place. She even ordered the food by herself. But Im confused,
not because of where I am (since I live around here), but because Im not
sure how I agreed to come with her exactly.
I furrow my brows as I look around the restaurant which is decorated with a
bunch of fish tanks. They fit very well with the theme and the name of the
restaurant, which is all about being in a giant fish tank. This place is famous
for how it is decorated and also for their delicious food. Ive been here many
times with my friends (whenever I had the money) or sometimes itd be Pa
bringing me here. However, aside from the huge fish that are swimming
around me, theres Yuri and
Phun and Aim sitting across from us. -_-
Im totally glad that Phun and Noh are close. If I had known this earlier, then
we couldve gone on double dates ages ago. Right, Aim?~ Yuris cheery
voice is blasting away next to me. Aim smiles in return. I feel really
uncomfortable having to listen to what she is saying. I dont know how Phun
is feeling, but I find this strangely difficult to swallow.
At any rate, a lot of you are probably wondering how I ended up here with
Yuri, Aim and Phun. Actually, I did nothing at all. Yuri kept pressuring me into
joining her for dinner. And no matter how I tried to turn her down, I was
dragged along to do whatever she wanted to anyway. She assumed that I
definitely wanted to have dinner with her somehow. (Really?!) Things ended
the way they tend to do when it comes to Yuri. I am always the victim of
Yuris own assumption. Every single time!
At first, I thought it was just going to be the two of us. We were just going to
take it easy then go home separately. But it didnt turn out like I originally
thought because after Yuri decided on her own that Id be joining her, (listen
to how much sense that made) she immediately called Aim, which meant
that my life was oversince Phund be coming along too.
We both gave up and let fate decided on how our lives will turn out after we
realized that we became the victims of these two ladies. We walked back to
change our clothes at the area were the cheerleaders were changing. But it
was different this time around because there were a ton of people since the

event has ended. I thought the place was going to collapse from all the
shrieking coming from the Angels Gang by the time Phun and I mustered
enough courage to take off our pants. This really did not help with my selfesteem issues. I thought I wasnt going to make it out there alive. (Especially
Phun) -_-
Not to mention that Phun was being a total smartass to me. At first, I was
confused since I thought he was going to wear the jumpsuit to dinner (since I
needed my jeans back). However, that didnt turn out to be the case because
he brought an extra pair of jeans with him from the start. That fucking
asshole!
He wore my jeans the entire day. It reeks of sweat. Goddamn him.
But its okay. You readers dont need to worry that I was taken advantage off.
I got him back by stomping all over his jeans for revenge.
Anyway, back to the studio. I was lost in my thoughts for a little while when
those two ladies already finished ordering the food. Neither Phun nor I had to
waste any time and give our opinions. Looking back, it wasnt so bad. Were
the type that can eat anything anyway, as long as theyre food meant for
human consumption.
I ordered the Schweinshaxe since its your favorite, Noh, Yuri turns to tell
me with a smile. I smile back in return, although Im a little confused. Um,
since when is that my favorite?
Thank you. Whatever, I guess it is now. -_- I mean, I dont dislike it or
anything. Heh heh.
Well, I ordered your favorite fried chicken too, Phun. I know you so well,
dont I? There they go again, why do these two girls insist on trying to one
up each other? There are only so many ways Phun and I can give you a wry
smile, you know.
I glance at Phun who has a wry smile on his face (the very same one as
mine) before he glances back at me and replies to Aim. Right, thank you
very much.
My brows are coiled like a knot. Why the hell are you acting so damn timid
anyway? I got nothing to do with this mess. While I was lost in my own
thoughts (about why hes even paying any attention to me) a bunch of
appetizers begin to arrive at our table which means that Im completely
distracted now.
They look so yummy! Ive forgotten about everything else!

This one, this one, Noh! Yuri quickly uses a pair of utensils to grab some of
the roasted ham hock for me right away. Aim refuses to give in either as she
puts a piece of salmon in fish sauce on Phuns plate. Hey, I kinda wanna
some of that salmon too, ya know!
I decide to get my gluttony under control and behave like how a gentleman
should instead, Oh, here you go. All I did was placing a piece of fried
calamari on Yuris plate. This puts her in a beyond elated mood as she
quickly lifts her plate to show this off to Aim. ^^ Theres no stopping these
two. I cant help but let out a soft chuckle.
Aim keeps her head down a bit since Phun is still too busy pouring everyone
a glass of water so he cant spoon any of the dishes on her plate. I notice
that she is tugging on Phuns shirt with her tiny hands rather roughly. Aw,
Phunyoure not gonna get me any food? Good luck, man. Heh heh.
Phun turns around with a puzzled look on his face which causes me to let out
a small chuckle. He spoons some of the deep fried cheese for Aim, Here you
go. Im sorry, I was busy with getting a glass of water for everyone. It
doesnt seem like she is satisfied with this at all.
I furrow my brows curiously because it seems Aim is even more upset now.
However, Phun seems to be oblivious of this since he is now sharing some of
the salmon from his plate to mine. There ya go, give me some of that ham
hock? Lets trade. This jerk is starting to act presumptuous like Yuri now too.
Real funny. When did I agree to that exactly? But thanks for the salmon, I
actually wanted some, I tell him as I stab a piece of it with a fork and put it
in my mouth. Im not letting Phun steal my ham hock. Hes making noises as
a protest. Heh heh. Idiot.
If ya eat that entire thing by yourself, the salmon and the pork are gonna
have a fucking battle in your esophagus. Then boom!
Theyre gonna turn into Koko Krunch or something? Youre seriously out of
your mind. My esophagus isnt a fucking wheat field. Here, just take these if
you want them that badly, I cant help but tell him off after he made such a
stupid joke (which is something I hear every Saturday and Sunday morning
during the cartoon block on channel 9) before I finally agree to share a tiny
bit the Schweinshaxe with him, despite the fact that he gave me half of his
salmon. Haha, Im not taking too much advantage of him, am I?
At last, this is turning into a war of who can eat what between us. Our
utensils become weapons as we try to snatch food from one anothers plate.

Were causing such a loud ruckus for a while before one of us notice
something isnt right.
Phun notices it before I did. He immediately stops fighting with me and turns
his attention Aim right away, Is everything alright, Aim? Youre being real
quiet? Hm?
I see that Aim is frowning so I decide to dial down my rowdiness a bit. I didnt
forget to check if Yuri is upset as well, (just in case being upset is a
contagious disease) but shes still smiling brightly. It seems she enjoyed the
battle between Phun and I from earlier.
Why did you give me this deep fried cheese? Did you forget that Im on a
diet? Holy shit, everyone. This is a family matter now, I dont want any part
of this. I quickly grab my glass of water to take a drink and pretend like I
cant hear their conversation.
OhIm sorry. Those two are trying to patch things up. Phun serves her a
bunch of other things onto Aims plate. I watch as he grabs a brightly colored
plate with a salad. Look, the rocket salad is yours, right? I remember, see?
Oh, hes pretty good at this stuff. I actually have no idea what Yuri ordered
but then she grabbed the bacon and shrimp spaghetti. Im glad this one
doesnt get upset so easily. I like that.
After having to listen to Phun try and make things up to Aim for a long while,
(it took him ages since Aim was upset with him for a long ass while) Aim
finally cracked a smile since Phun kept giving her the seafood glass noodles
salad to please her the entire time.
I can only stare at whatever that is going on across from me, unable to
explain to myself what this feeling means. The utensils in my hands feel
heavy. Theyre so heavy that I cant help but simply push the food on my
plate around rather than eating them.
NohNohNohNoh! Huh?! I flinch real hard when Yuri startles me by
shaking my body. Where the heck did my mind wander off to? Im still
holding a fork and spoon in my hands. How embarrassing. I shake my head
to get rid of those weird thoughts before I turn my attention to the person
who was calling my name, Yes? What is it?
Whered your mind wander off to? Are you sad about the ham hock? I can
order you some more.
No, no. Its not that. Im not that much of a glutton, I quickly turn her down
as she giggles at me. Then, Yuri puts her utensils down and reach over to get
Aims attention.

Hey, hey. Bring it up already? Im still waiting. Phun and I stare at the two
girls in confusion after hearing Yuri saying something rather strange. We
have no idea what theyre up to.
Aim hesitates a bit before she taps on Phuns shoulder even though he is
already looking at her, Whats up?
Phun, are you free next week? Phun seems a bit befuddled but he grabs his
phone to check his schedule anyway.
Yuri follows suit, Noh, check yours too! Check yours too! She smiles as she
pleads with me. However, do I look like someone who bothers making
schedules for himself let alone putting them in my phone? (I use a method
called Reminder via Memoryand this is why I forget things often.) But from
what I can recall, I dont think Ill be busy.
Phun continues fussing with his phone for a couple of minutes before he
looks up and answers, Im free. Is there some place you want to go? Aim
grins widely when she hears his answer. Yuri is nudging me with her
shoulder, What about you, Noh?
I think Im free. Whats going on? Why are they keeping hush on this? Im
dying to know!
Even though I asked the question, Im unsure whether Id like to find out the
answer when I see Yuri and Aim breaking out into a weird smile. I swallow a
bit since I can sense that these two are up to something and it cant be good.
Theyre also giving us weird looks too. So what the hell is going on here?!
Aim won that thing. Yuri is the first to speak before she taps on Aims hand
so she can show what that thing is. Speaking of that thing, what the hell
is it exactly? Guys have dirty minds, ya know!
Before my mind gets a chance to think naughty thoughts, I get my answer
when I see a white card in front of me.
Its a gift voucher. Although, Im still trying to figure out what kind of a gift
voucher this is. Yuri probably notices that Im being real slow so she
continues speaking, Aim got the gift voucher from Serenade. Its a resort in
Hua Hin. The voucher is for two rooms too! Lets go together? Please?
Please? Please? Please? At this point, my arm is a bamboo tree and theres
a koala hanging on to it.

So what now? I glance at Phun, who is giving me an odd look. Its probably
the same look that Im giving to him right now too, because I feel its
awkward for the four of us to be going on a trip together like this.
What do you say, Noh? Lets go then! There Yuri goes again. This disease
of hers is getting out of hand. Meanwhile, Aim is giving Phun a sweet smile,
Lets go together, Phun?
No guy in this world can decline in this situation.
***
After I am completely stuffed (girls these days sure love to compete on who
can take care of their boyfriend better) and paid the bill which came to a 4digit total, we walked the girls to catch a cab. I remembered to choose the
light blue one since they have GPS (so they said in the advertisements) and
took the photos of the license number on my phone too. (Better safe than
sorry, it was getting pretty late.)
Why didnt we drop them off in person? Well, thats because we still have
somewhere else to be.
U-Wo-U-Wo-Oh.
I wasnt thinking of anything.
Youre cute so I came to introduce myself.
My iPhone yells loudly (I had just changed the ringtone when we were
working at the stadium. Nong Paeng sent it to be via bluetooth) just as the
light blue taxi is leaving. I quickly grab a hold of it and look at the screen
only to see Oms fucked up face.
What?
DID YOU DITCH YOUR MOM YET?! What in the holy hell is he shouting for?! I
flinch so hard that it makes Phun laugh. (How embarrassing.) Dont think that
Ill just give him a nice answer, I need to yell at his stupid ass first.
The fuck are you shouting for?! Where are you?! Its fucking loud!!
At the restaurant! Everyone is already here except you and your dad! What
the hell is up with this bastard? First a mom, now a dad.
Yeah, yeah. Dad and I are on our way. I just sent Mom home. Be sure to
come shine our shoes in front of the place when we get there. Well be there
in 20. See ya! I hang up right away since it was getting too loud. There was
music (were not meeting at a club, its a restaurant that has a live band) and

there were also our friends making a bunch of noises too. Im a million
percent sure that all of us are crashing that restaurant.
So which restaurant is it? Phun asks me as he hails a cab for us. I open the
door and get in before telling the cab driver, Lumphini Park, please.
It didnt take us very long to arrive where our friends planned to meet up.
Actually, I didnt need to be told where it is since we come here often just to
chill. I dont really know why we pick this place either. But I know that
anywhere is great as long as my friends are there.
Phun and I get out of the cab and make our way to the area where our
friends are hanging out together. I hear loud welcoming noises coming from
them. It was kind of like when a dog howls and then the rest of the pack
follows suit. (Oh, shit.) Jeez, did the entire school show up here? This zone is
filled with my classmates. There are about 40-50 people here.
The new couples here! Woo!~ Fucking Om makes a catcall towards us like
someone whos drunk, (which he probably is) then he makes everyone else
do the same. I feel like grabbing my head and just go home at this point.
However, Phun just smiles before he pulls me in with his arm around my
shoulders.
What the fuck kind of a joke is he trying to play?! Lumphini Park is going to
explode because of these booming noises coming from these guys. -_-
Yo, Phun! Quit playing around! Noh, come have a seat! Thank you God, for
making Earn say something and saved my life. He shouts an invitation for me
to sit next to him. Phuns own group of friends call out to him so he can join
them at a different table as well.
I settle in on an empty chair that they saved for me. There are a ton of
juniors sitting around here. The ones that helped out during the soccer
event, the cheerleaders, the troops, the parade members, stand members,
marching band members and the likes. Even the ones who didnt help out
are here to celebrate too. I dont really mind though, were all friends here.
^___^
But the most surprising thing has to be
Golf!
Golfs here too!
Golf is one of my best friends. (He used to be in the band too, but only for a
short while. He was too lazy to show up for practice so he quit. What an ass.)

Hes a pretty good guy. He loves to have fun and he loves his friends. (His
friends love him too.) He usually goes with the flow. The downside is that
hes pretty hot-headed and reckless. Hes not very cautious either. Plus, he
has that obnoxious look to him so he gets picked on by the seniors and
students from other schools often and theyd get into a fist fight. (And
dragged me along and got me trouble too plenty of times.) Just last year, he
got into a fight with someone who happens to be nephews of the schools
headmaster. Unfortunately, Golf got expelled over that. (We hated the
headmaster so much back then. I still do, actually.)
Even so, we still keep in touch. Wed hang out at random places or
sometimes hed come over to my house. We talk on the phone often too.
However, we havent seen each other lately (it started when I got busy with
the soccer tournament) until tonight.
How are you doing, man?! You disappeared on me! I smack his back loudly
as a greeting.
Im good. My new school has a bunch of cute mixed-race girls so Im pretty
happy about that, he boasts immediately. Of course, you only had to deal
with guys when you were at my school. Im jealous. Golf transferred to an
international academy near Sukhumvit.
I want one. Can you find one for me? That perverted line didnt come from
me but it cant be anyone else other than Om. He pokes his head in close, I
can smell the stink of booze coming from him.
There are some, but girls have standards, ya know.
Motherfucker! Well, Golf isnt exactly wrong about that. I find Oms facial
expression really funny. Hes kind of purple and red, completely wasted.
(Oms skin tone is on the darker side. Hes not very dark, just a little tan.)
Oms not only the horny dude around here, there are more of that nearby. I
dont want a white girl though. Can I get a Japanese girl? Like Nohs nong
Yuri? Can you find me one? Goddamn Film. Youre crossing the line now. I
smack him in the head. Ow, what the fuck?! You know, you should just give
nong Yuri to me. Rumor has it that you dont exactly wanna be with her
anyway. You should just keep Phun since hes your new husband. These
fucking assholes, I swear. Talking shit is either a virus spread through air. Or
is it like a sexual transmitted disease? Shouldnt the Ministry of Public Health
take care of this stuff?
U-Wo-U-Wo-Oh.
I wasnt thinking of anything.
Youre cute so I came to introduce myself.

I dont get a chance to yell at anybody since Yuri is calling me. I suppose she
wants to let me know that she made it home safely. I answer the call while
pointing at Films face as a warning. He makes a mocking face back at me
which only makes me wanna kick his ass even more.
I leave the table so I can speak to her outside since I dont want to disturb
her with the loud noises. Yuri called to let me know that she made it home
and that I shouldnt drink too much. She also asked me to text her once I get
myself home too. Ah, its okay. Its better to have someone looking out for
you than having no one at all, thats what I choose to tell myself.
I was on the phone with Yuri for a while before I noticed that Golf followed me
outside. Hes giving me strange looks as if he wants to talk to me something.
My guts are telling me that he isnt out here for a smoke break so I decide to
end the call with Yuri, I gotta go, okay? Ill text you when I get home. Yes,
yes. Bye.
Golf hands me a cigarette right away once Im off the phone. However, I
dont smoke since Im afraid that my lips wont stay pink. That was a joke.
Please dont believe everything I say. The truth is that I dont really know
how to smoke cigarettes and my parents would yell at me until my ears go
numb if they find out.
No, thanks. Is there something wrong, Golf? I know that I have never seen
him look this concerned before.
So youve been hanging out with Phun lately? UghI really hate this
question. I wouldve started cursing at them if this were anyone else, but
Golf has such a serious look on his face.
Yeah, a little. Seriously, you okay? I only grow more curious when I notice
his hesitations. He still wont tell me so I want to know what it is even more,
Man, just tell me if theres something wrong. Come on!
Is heI mean, Phun. Is he still with his girlfriend?

CHAPTER 25: COULDNT

Is heI mean, Phun. Is he still with his girlfriend?
Im a little perplexed by Golfs question for a couple of reasons. Why is he
asking me about this out of the blue? More importantly, shouldnt he be
asking Phun about this? Why is he asking his friend instead?
With Aim? Well, yeah. All of us were having dinner together just earlier.
Suddenly, I feel a strange sharp pain in my heart after I gave Golf an answer.
I need to keep telling myself over and over that it is a good thing that they
havent broken up.
I take in a deep breath as I glance at Golfs muddled face. It seems like he
isnt happy with the fact that his friends romance life is flourishing. Whats
up with this guy? Is there something the matter?
Golf is still not giving me an answer even though I repeated my question. He
shakes his head and takes another hit of the cigarette before he hands me
an XDA O2. What is with him? Eh? Are you showing off? Whatever, Im
starting to hate hanging out with rich guys, I make a joke as an excuse to
insult him so he smacks me in the head. I guess I was wrong? ^^
Dumbass, Im not trying to show off. Just take a look at the video. Jeez, I
dont see why he needs to get all serious. I glance at his face which has a
grim expression, then I accept the fancy phone and take a look. At any rate,
how do I use this thing anyway? Which buttons am I supposed to be
pressing?
How do you use this?! I complain loudly as I use the stylus to hit random
icons but Golf isnt even paying attention to me. (Dont blame me if I break
your shit.) He walks away to continue smoking in a nearby area. I guess hes
afraid that the smoke might be bothering me.
At last, I somehow clumsily made my way through to the video tab. Holy
shitttttttt! There are a ton of porn in here!
Damn, youre kind of a pervert. Send me some later, heh heh heh. I shout
to him so that hed laugh. However, he rushes back once he hears me.
His ominous expression is confusing me. He uses one of his palm to cover
the screen and stares at me. Take a look at this. Then tell me what you
see, he tells me before he leaves and goes back to have a smoke. So hes
just going to let this Noh stay confused like this?

The only way to find out what is going on is to watch the video.
I take a look at the video he had chosen and hit play. It seems be some sort
of a homemade video since I see a guys face covering the entire screen as
he adjusts the camera before he walks to the bed. Im feeling a little
uncomfortable since Im not sure whether what Im watching right now is
porn or not.
And I was right. -_- The phone continues to play a porn clip. Now, theres a
guy and a girl making out on the bed while being completely naked. (My
guess is that its a hotel room.) The camera is set a little too low since I cant
see the girls face very clearly. (I already saw the guys face when he was
setting up the camera.)
Damn, the girl has a really nice body. Her skin is light and smooth. Her
breasts are the perfect size, theyre not too small but not too big either. Im
starting to get worried for myself since Im not sure if I should keep watching.
What if I get into a mood right here and now? Thatd be bad. What the fuck is
Golf trying to do here? Is he just messing with me?
Just as I am about to turn my head so I can yell at the owner of the cell
phone, I am at a loss for words when I notice what is playing on the screen.
At this point, I am more than certain that I will never ever get turned on by
this clip.
I widen my eyes so I can see clearly, just to make sure. The couple falls on
the bed so I am able to see the girls face.
I see a perfectly beautiful face which is very familiar to me. I recognize those
pair of eyes since I see them very often. She squints as if she is filled with
lust. I can see a tall nose and a pair of red lips. She is biting them as she gets
into the mood.
I have never seen her face during these moments before. But based from
what I am seeing, all my senses are telling me that this girl is
Aim. Phuns girlfriend. This is definitely my friends girlfriend.
So many thoughts are running through my head as I stare at the screen and
witness everything that is going on. I cant watch this any longer. I hit pause
and turn my face away even though the clip goes on way longer than this.
It seems Golf realizes that I finally understand what he wanted to tell me. He
walks over to gently pat my head after he pulls the phone away from my
hand, I couldnt finish it either. I felt fucking awful.

Whats the meaning of this? I ask him as I sit down on the sidewalk, feeling
completely exhausted. I could never have imagined that Id ever have to
deal with something like this.
Golf crouches down next to me, That guy in the clip is my friend. Um, at my
school He begins.
Aim is pretty well-known. Nearly all my friends have slept with her already.
How is this even possible?
And they dont even need to spend a single buck, he continues as he blows
a puff of smoke. I dont know what Golf means by this, but I really detest
what he said.
Yo, maybe this is all a misunderstanding. Youre ruining her reputations
here.
Ivedealt with her personally, Noh. I quickly turn my head to face him,
Dealt with how?
I was at Jet the other day. I ran into Aim, she was hanging out with a bunch of
my friends.
Then what?
She was getting little drunk then she pretty much threw herself at me. I
guess she didnt know which school I previously went to. I assumed that Aim
broke up with Phun.
..
We even got all the way to the hotel, but I couldnt do it. It didnt matter
how hot she was, I used to see her around so it felt weird. I just couldnt do
it. I didnt even get hard, man. Fuck, I wasted my money paying for that hotel
room. Heh. Heh. I force out a laughter along with Golf since he probably was
just being obnoxious when he complained about the money. I know that a
guy who loves his friends like Golf could never do something like that, even if
he and Phun arent very close or anything.
I dont know what else to say. Everything is all muddled inside my head. The
evidence is right there in the form of a video. Golf even told me what
happened with him. But Im too afraid, too afraid to believe anything. My
brain is telling me that there has to be some sort of a mistake. I desperately
wish that this is all just a misunderstanding.

Golf notices that Im having a hard time accepting this so he reaches over
and slightly squeezes my shoulder, Just give Phun a heads up. I feel really
bad for him, man.
How? I dont even know how Ill be able to tell him about this, I answer
him while I keep my hands in a tight fist. I see that Golf is giving me an
understanding nod.
We sit there in silence for a long while before Golf pats my shoulder and
invites me to go back inside. Im completely at a loss in this moment.

***

Once I made it back to the table, booze was the first thing that I asked for.
Yo, what the hell did you do to Noh?! Why is he turning into some drunken
old man?! The sounds of Earns loud yelling at Golf reach my ears. I suppose
it had to do with how my glass is never empty ever since I got back inside
with Golf. Who says Im drunk anyway?! Im not drunk at all!
I just feel like the gravity is too strong lately. Why does my head keeps
aiming for the ground?
Get me another oneeeee, Even though Earn keeps nagging me, I still got
Om who has my back. He continues to mix drinks for me to the point where I
lost counts of how many Ive had. Om must be pretty wasted himself,
because each glass continues to get stronger and stronger.
I lift my heavy lids to see that my friends had ordered another bottle of Black
Label. Things are getting a little blurry for me, I guess my eyes are starting to
lose focus. I see Kengs faint shadow as he hits me on the head as he tells
everyone, This bastard is so damn wasted.
What?! Im not wasted! Im starting to get pissed off, but I dont really care
who is saying what. I only know that my head is killing me right now. Im in
no mood to argue with anybody. Im keeping my head low and I feel like the
ham hock and the salmon are about to make their way back up my throat. I
decide itd be better if I keep my head up instead.
I stare up to the ceiling and fight against the lights from the restaurant. I feel
like my brows are furrowed so much, its like there are magnets pulling them
together. No matter how hard I try to force them apart, I am unable to do it.

All the thoughts inside my head are having a battle. Im so confused. I dont
know what to do at all.
I saw those images from the video clip only for a short moment, yet the
reality of it is so clear in my head. My thoughts are telling all my senses what
kind of a woman that person is. Those things, along with Golfs voices which
are replaying loudly inside my head, are telling me over and over what had
happened. Things that Phun have no idea has happened.
I think of Phuns smile. The smile that he gives me to me, to Aim and to
everybody. That eternally beautiful smile of his. I cannot bring myself to
forgive the person who has destroyed that smile. I cannot bring myself to
forgive the person who couldnt see what a prize Phun really is. No, not for
the person who made it clear that all of Phuns loving and good intentions
were for naught.
This is hurting me so much more than the night we had to say goodbye.
My hands are in a tight fist. My nails are digging into my flesh. I can only
think about how devastated Phun will be. My insides are being squeezed so
tight that it hurts. I shouldnt have learned about this at all.
Because I dont know if theres anything I can do for Phun. Or, should I just
let things be as they are?
My head is filled with the only word why. Why? Why?
My friends are still partying and laughing away with no sign of stopping. I
dont have the energy to join them. This isnt because Im drunk, but rather
Im so drained from my own thoughts. I admit that I cannot let this grave
mistake continue. Im too scared to think whether what I experienced tonight
is the truth, or if its only a dream. Maybe this is not all there is to the story.
Aim might have a reason (that I cannot think of). Or maybe that wasnt Aim
at all.
I shout at myself internally, telling myself not to fully believe in anything.
Because in the end, Aim will be the one who has the most to lose and the
person who will be most devastated is my friend.
Idont want to believe any this
Noh, whats the matter? I hear a familiar deep voice which interrupts my
thoughts. I open my eyes to see the person standing in front of me with a
silly smile on his face. Who the hell let him drunk this much? Hes red all
over, Phun turns around to ask my friends.

Yeah, yeah. You look take care of him. Your boyfriend seriously cant handle
alcohol, Rodkeng says as he chuckles to himself. These bastards. If I have
any energy left, Id be kicking all your asses. But I dont. Not tonight.
I sit still and watch as Phun sits on my chairs armrest. Hes having a great
time chatting with our friends. Every once in a while, Id hear his laugh.
Nevertheless, he occasionally turns around to check whether Im still alive.
Noh! One more, one more! Even so, Om continues to pass drinks my way.
Im definitely not turning them down either. I reach over to accept the glass,
but someone elses hand blocks me. Hes pretty wasted, Om. I think hes
had enough, theres only one person who would go against what I want.
No way, Phun! We ordered this bottle so Noh needs take responsibilities for
it! Oms nagging voice means that he wont let this go easily. I cant really
see what kind of face Phun is making, but I see a shadow of his hand
accepting the drink for himself.
You can make them for me instead then. Ill drink them myself, I reach over
and instinctively grab his arm when I hear those words. No, Phun. Just let
me get drunk by myself.
I wont be drunk. Im not a weakling, he tells me with a hint of slyness in
his voice that makes me want to kick him. However, I cant exactly do that
right now. He pushes my forehead with his finger which makes me fall
backwards because I have no strength to resist. Youre so wasted, theres no
way you can keep drinking. He gently caresses my forehead with the same
hand. I cant help but break into a smile.
I grab his hand that is on my forehead with mixed feelings, Phun
Yes, what is it?
No matter what happensIll always be here for you, okay?

CHAPTER 26: KINDNESS

My fucking head is killing me.
Thats the only thought I have spinning inside me. My headache is getting
worse, I feel like Im about to pass out. Id rather just lie down right here if I
could, but who the hell is dragging me along anyway?
Let goof meI wanna sleeeeeeeeep
Youll get to sleep soon. I recognize the voice right away. Phunwhere
areyoutakingmeeeeeee? It is taking so much effort just to spit out
each word, damn it!
Taking you to bed so you can sleep. Please stop struggling, youre fucking
heavy, Phun tells me as he moves my arm over his own shoulders. I feel
dizzy and a little nauseated, like something is about to make its way back up
my throat. Were almost there, he says. I feel a tiny bit better hearing that
from him.
We stumble around and make our way up the stairs. My head is still
pounding as Phun is trying to open a door. I open my eyes to see thatthis is
his bedroom. I quickly close my eyes again.
Why the hell did me bring me here?! I wanna go home!
Home! Take me home! Home! I wanna go homeeeeeeeee! Im using all the
strength I have left to break free when I found out where I am. Although, Im
not completely sure why Im making such a huge fuss over this.
Phun tightens his grips on my arm. Quit being so stubborn. Youre pretty
wasted. Do you wanna go back there so your pa can smack you silly? He
follows with some more nagging but I dont know what about. By the time
Ive come to again, my back is against a soft mattress. It feels heavenly. I still
have no energy left in me to reposition myself to sleep properly though.
I try to move around on the bed since I dont feel comfortable. Phun ends up
helping me by shoving my back so I can lay down in a better position. My
head is hurting so bad that I am forced to push his shoulder to stop him, Will
you be alright, Noh? What should I tell him? My head is about to explode at
any moment. I dont even have the strength to open my mouth to say a
word.
The headaches are getting worse and worse, so I force myself to open my
eyes. The first thing I see is Phun Phumipats face, which is close enough to
mine that I can feel his breath.
The second I see those alarming black eyes staring back at me, I completely
forget about my headache. Its strange how theres something in Phuns eyes
that entice you so much that you simply cannot look away. It is like theyre
pleading with you so that you wouldnt leave.
I stare deep into those shining eyes which are moving closer and closer ever
slowly. Our faces are so close that we see each other very clearly. I can feel
Phuns hand gently caressing my head as our lips slowly touch.
But

Ugh! Bleurgh! Emergency! Emergency! Vacate the premise immediately! I

shove Phun off me and jump to the bathroom so I can hug the toilet.
Bleurgh
Heh heh, youre throwing up? You really are a weakling. I can hear Phuns
mocking tone not too far from me, but Im in no mood to argue with him
because I feel that puking is a priority right now. I can hear him chuckling in
his throat before I feel a thick hand rubbing on my back.
Throw it all up so youd feel better. Well, thats easy for you to say! Its a
lot harder in practice! I really want to turn around and curse at him but I feel
way too nauseated. Im trying to force myself to let it all out, but there isnt
much coming out of me.
Phun patiently rubs my back for a very long while, So are you throwing up
or what? I suppose he notices that Ive been hugging the toilet for a while
and nothing is happening.
I want tobuttheres nothinggggg. In the end, I have no choice but to
accept this horrible situation that Im facing, even though I still feel awfully
nauseated. I realize I cant exactly stay here befriending a toilet and be a
burden to Phun wholl continue to rub my back. I decide to just let go and
have Phun help me up so I can go back to the bed. As my head continues to
bounce up and down, I am aware that Im at my limits.
Bleurghhhhhhhhh. Theres vomit all over the both of us. -_- My legs give
out the moment the first shot has been fired. Im on the bathroom floor in
the middle of the puddle, feeling exhausted.
You okay, Noh?! Its weird that Phun isnt yelling at me for what I did.
Instead, he sits down and helps prop up my near comatose body. I intend to
let him know that Im okay, but when I open my mouth
Bleurghhhhhhhhh. And theres the second round, everybody. Ive totally
lost all control. This is not a joke! Right now, I only know that since Im
already puking, I might as well go all the way to the end. I dont care if Im
throwing up on anybody. Lets just say that Im taking advantage of Phuns
good will since hes not cursing at me. Bleurghhhhhhhhh.
All gone yet? He continues to rub my back as I throw up a couple times
more. Eventually, I feel that my stomach is now empty, All goneeeee.
You sure? Phun asks me once more before he takes me to get cleaned up
in the bathtub. We both stink of vomit. The only reason Id throw up again
would be due to the stench.
I sit on the edge of the tub, feeling very worn out. Ive turned into a docile
Noh who is allowing Phun to take off the shirt and the jeans, which are now a
big smelly mess. I face down and let the water from the shower head run
through my hair. Meanwhile, Phun is taking off his own clothes so now were
both in our boxer shorts. What are you doinggggg? You tend to get
paranoid when youre drunk, I suppose.
What else?! Im trying to get cleaned up! He replies while he laughs at me,
then he pulls the shower head and rinse my body. I cover myself up when I
notice that Phun is trying to soap me up, What are you gonna do to
meeeee?

If youre not gonna take a shower then Im dragging your ass to the garage
and you can sleep there. He threatens me before he lifts my arms and legs
to cover me in suds. I cant exactly argue with him since I do agree that Im
undoubtedly filthy tonight.
I sit still and let Phun clean me up. Im starting to feel a little more sober little
by little. At last, I finally fully grasp what is happening and realize that Phun
is giving me bath.
I think about how strange this must be, to take a shower while wearing a pair
of boxer shorts like this.
Phun
Whats up? You sober yet? He asks me while shampooing his own hair.
Better now. Dont you feel uncomfortable?
What do you mean by that? He asks me as he turns around to rinse his
hair.
Wearing boxer shorts while taking a shower Even though I realize that
my question is a little iffy and sounds a bit dirty, but I suppose that Im still in
a haze so I had the guts to ask that question. Phun immediately stops rinsing
his hair.
He turns his handsome face around and raises his browns mockingly at me,
And? You want me to take them off or what?
Do you usually wear that when you take showers with friends during a
camping trip? I reply with a question, refusing to surrender.
No. Naked, he laughs. I definitely dont want that image in my head.
Yeah, and this this your house. Shouldnt you do whatever youre
comfortable with? Why the heck am I even saying this? Damn this mouth of
mine. Im gonna slap you silly once I get my strength back. I notice that Phun
is still for a moment after he heard what I had said, then he goes back to
rinsing his hair. When he finally finished, he grabs a towel to dry us both.
Hey he begins.
Im not that much of a gentlemanand I really dont want to be a bigger
asshole than I already am. Seeing his lonely smile makes my chest tighten. I
cant really explain it.
Phun flashes a smile for a second, then I feel his soft lips gently touching my
forehead.
This is enough to make me happy.we should get some sleep. And dont
throw up on the bed, he tells me before he drags me to get a change of
clothes so we can head to bed.
We sleep next to each other with a body pillow between us. But yet, I feel
strangely safe just by holding his hand like this.
If this is the kindness that Phun gives to Aim
then I dont want this to be all in vain.
***

I got made fun pretty badly by Om when I showed up to school on Monday.

He kept talking about how I was so wasted that Phun took me home, then
there are a lot of shit that I apparently did. Im so damn humiliated!
He was acting like hes the shit when he was drunk. Like, he was gonna kick
anyones ass if they pissed him off. Hes still going on about this. This is
probably the third time this morning that he insists on making sure that Id
die of embarrassment by talking about this to everybody.
Seriously? Youre talking about our Noh?! Palm asks in a high pitch
voice. Why not?! Someone like me cant act like a thug or something?!
Yes, this Noh. We all see him as a weirdo but hes such a thug when hes
drunk. Phun was nice enough to finish the last bottle but this bastard
smacked Phun in the head. That guy was so stunned, everyone was laughing
like crazy. It was so fucking embarrassing! Hahaha! Holy shit, did I really do
that?!
Wait, he smacked Phun Phumipat in the head? The student council
secretary?!
Yeahhhh! I couldnt believe it. Talk about an abusive relationship. Phun is
way too afraid of his wife. Asshole! So I cant keep quiet anymore, is that
it? Im opening my mouth to curse at Om when I notice that Palm has a panic
look in his eyes.
Since when did Phun and you got into that kind of a relationship?
Smack!
I end up smacking this fuckers head first for not listening properly. Goddamn
it.
Om bursts into a huge laughter (since he got away with this) before he gets
Palms attention so he can continue with the story. Even though Palm is hurt,
he still has not learned his lesson. Hes paying close attention to all the shitty
things Ive allegedly done on Saturday.
To be honest, Im kind of curious as to what exactly I did. (Is Om telling the
truth or is he embellishing the story?) But the more I listen, the more I realize
that Im not curious about this anymore. T___T I was such an asshole. I was
loud and caused a huge scene. I was being a jerk to the waitstaff. I spilled
drinks all over the place. I physically attacked my friends. I also recall
dropping my cellphone about three times. It got so bad that my friends
decided that itd be best if I go home. However, I refused to leave. Om said
that it took about ten of the guys to force me into a cab so that Phun
(unfortunately for him) could stop the insanity.
So why didnt Phun mention how horrible I was being at all?! T____T He really
needs to stop being such a gentleman! Argh!
Shit, there was this too. Noh was so drunk but he was acting all tough,
right? So he picked up his sorry ass to go somewhere but Phun didnt let him
and kept pulling him back. Noh didnt give in so he shrugged Phun off so
hard that he ended up losing his balance. Luckily, Phun was quick enough to
grab him. Holy shit, it was like a scene from those novels where the guy was
carrying the girl in his arms when she was about to fall down!

Romantic as hell! Maybe you should just listen quietly instead of giving
your opinions, Palm.
Yeah, so fucking romantic. The girl ended up punching the guy in the face
and they both end up on the floor in this version. We were laughing our asses
off! Ahhhhhhhh! I wish I could disappear right this second!
Om and Palm laugh to themselves before they continue with their critiques.
If it werent for the fact that they each have a girlfriend, then I wouldve
thought that I was watching a married couple bickering. Well, at least he
still remembers that I have a girlfriend
I stopped listening to them after that. (It was getting too long.) Now I wonder
how Phun is doing. I didnt bother checking if there were any bruises when I
saw him. I suppose I really was a little too drunk.
So is Phun okay? I had to watch you beating him up like that. He didnt get
too many bruises, did he? Om takes a second to ask me just as I was
thinking about it.
Dont know.
Didnt you see anything when you were taking a shower?
I was drunk. It was all a blur, I didnt see clearly.
. Wait. Was I just tricked into admitting
something?
HOLY SHIT, NOH AND PHUN TOOK A SHOWER TOGETHER! Oh,
fuuuuuck! Om is shouting very loudly. It was so loud that everyone in the
class rushes over to where we are. Fucking hell! I didnt!
Yo! Asshole! We both had our boxer shorts on! Im throwing out an excuse
to cover my own ass, but Rodkeng (who ran over just now) is pointing at me
as if he wants to accuse me of something.
If there was nothing weird going on the between of you, then you wouldve
done that naked like normal guys. But you had to keep your boxer shorts on
as if you needed some sort of restraints to prevent yourselves from doing
something!
Woooooooo! I really hate these bastards for always acting as backups.
(Assholes!) How is it that they always catch on to me? I dont have any
strengths left to argue with them anymore!
While everyone is having fun teasing me
What are you guys up to? Youre being so damn loud. Goddamn, of all the
time to show up, why does it have to be now?! I turn around to see Phuns
face, the other party in this dispute. Hes just standing there looking clueless.
On a personal note, it feels like Im seeing a ghost.
Woooooooooooo! There they go again. You know what? Go find some
stupid doves to release and dont forget the throw some rice while youre at
it too.
Lets wish them lots of fun for their honeymoonnnnnnn! Rodkeng and Keng
shove my back towards Phun. (Where are my fucking doves?! And rice?!
Youre sending me off to the honeymoon already?! Goddamn!) It seems that
Phun doesnt really understand whats going on, but theres that smile on his

face. Hes quite entertained by my friends weirdness. This is only making

things harder for me. -_- Can you not be so oblivious?
Mind if I borrow the bride for a while? Ill bring him back soon. Good god,
do you even realize what youre saying?! My friends are yelling loudly as Im
being dragged away outside. ToT Oh, my life.
What were you friends doing? It seemed fun, he excitedly asks me once we
made our way outside. I really dont know how to answer him, heh.
Um I begin to ask him about what Ive been curious about right away,
Was I really beating you up? That night at Lumphini Park? It seems he
didnt expect me to ask such a question because he is stunned for a
moment.
Why?
Om told me that I was being a real jerk when I was wasted. I beat you up
and everything. Shit, Im really sorryyyyy! I was druuuuuunk! I didnt mean
to do all of thaaaaat! I apologize profusely to him since I feel so guilty. Why
was he being such a nice guy about it anyway? Why did he endure all of
that? He didnt complain even once.
I can hear him chuckling, though theres a hint of slyness.
Yeah, it really hurt. You were fucking abusive to me. Ive been wondering on
how to get you back for all of that.
Fuck, Im sorry! Punch me! Go ahead! Kick me too! Ill let you do it all
today!
Turn your head down and close your eyes! Jeez, does he think hes a senior
or something? At any rate, I cant go against him since I already told him that
Ill let him do whatever he wants today. I hope he wont hit me too hard
though. Y__Y
I keep my head down. My eyes are shut tightly while Im wondering what
Phun will do. Will he hit me in the head? Flick my ear? Elbow me? Knee me in
the gut? Something? Which one hurts the most anyway? Will I be able to
handle whatever it is hell do to me? I keep wondering and wondering.
Eventually, I feel something cold around my neck.
You can open them now.
I open my eyes to see the silver dog tag, the souvenir from the soccer
tournament, hanging around my neck. Oh! I almost forgot about this! So
there are leftovers after all?!
Phun smiles as he shakes his head. Nah, there were a ton of stand members
this year. The alumni joined in too. I was able to grab one when I was feeding
Earn and stuff.
Just one?
Yeah.
What about yours?
Never mind me. That one is yours. Will he ever stop being such a
gentleman? This is stressing me out.
Real funny. You grabbed this one so you should keep this! I scold him while
I try to take the dog tag off. Phun immediately grabs my hands and holds it

tight. Hes giving me a strange look, as if hes very bothered by what Im

doing.
Imgiving this to you. So can you not be like this..? Right, I forgot that I
shouldnt be behaving like this. Phun probably notices that Ive stopped
trying to take it off so he lets go of my hand.
You worked pretty hard too, you probably want one. Plus, the guys normally
give this to their girlfriend anyway. I have no idea why I said that last part.
But it is true though. Mementos from large events like this one are pretty
important. So if you were to give it away, its usually to someone youre
dating.
Phun lets a long sigh, long enough that I can feel them. Aim got a ton of
stuff from meso just let me give you something for once. Dont say
no. What am I supposed to say after hearing that?
We stand here, staring at each other in silence. Even so, I have plenty of
thoughts going inside my head. I know that Phun does too. His eyes are
trying to tell me something.
Hey, Noh! Oh, Phun? Got lost? We both flinch when we hear Earns voice
saying hello to me and a tease to Phun. Phun turns to smile to the friend that
happens to be the president of the cheer team which had just finished their
latest project last Saturday.
Did you get lost too? Phun teases him back. Earn chuckles in return. Your
bruises are healing okay? Goddamn him! Will these people ever stop talking
about the shit I did back at the Lumphini Park?!
Phun laughs as he mockingly glances my way. I was thinking about telling
my dad about this. Whatever, crybaby. If it werent for the fact that I
punched him so many times on Saturday, Id be punching him now.
Yeah, you should do that. So are you done talking to him yet? I gotta talk to
him about something. So these bastards think Im a Rotiboy employee or
something? Do I need to start handing out numbers for people waiting in
line?
Phun grins at me. Yeah, Im done. Anyway, dont forget about this Friday,
Noh. He tells Earn before he turns to remind me about the trip to Hua Hin. I
actually almost forgot about that. Earn seems to be confused as he watches
Phun walking away.
Whats happening on Friday?
Its nothing. Whats up? I quickly change the topic since it looks like theres
something he wants to discuss with me.
Oh, right. I came to give you this. As promised. Earn flashes a smile and
shows me the silver dog tag. Butah, what the heck?!
Oh, Im wearing one right now! I point to my neck. So he didnt even look,
is that it? -_- Earn looks so startled as if he had seen a ghost. Whered you
get that?! None of technique team got one, I thought! But it seems Im the
only member that will get two? Hahaha.
Phun gave me this just now. Sorry, man. I guess youll be heartbroken, bro.
I joke as I lightly pat his shoulder. I wasnt being serious but I notice that his
expression went grim.

YeahI guess thats true. What was he mumbling about? I couldnt hear
him.
Huh?
Nothing, nothing. I better get to class. My band is joining the Live Contest,
by the way. Ill submit the application later. Earn changes the topic to the
Live Contest event that my club is hosting right before Christmas. Its a
contest where the winner will get to play during the Christmas event and
also gets an opportunity to compete in the RAD competition at Wat
Ratchabophit. I give Earn a friendly smile.
Yeah, sure. Drop it off at the club room, okay? But if youre too busy, then
you can drop it off here at my classroom too. I tell him but he simply gives
me a wry smile instead of a reply before saying goodbye and goes back to
his classroom.
Whats up with him? Why does he look so depressed about it?
But never mind that.
Im heading to Hua Hin this Friday already?

CHAPTER 27: HOW DARE AM I

This week has been an incredible week for all of us. The soccer event turned
out great so everyone was in a joyous mood. Even Mr. Fiem, who usually
stands at the gate looking menacing, hasnt been hanging out there this
week. I havent seen him there at all, I guess that hes been enjoying this
proud accomplishment. I feel like its better this way. I actually prefer it (since
I wont have to tuck in my shirt). ^___^
Even so, God is never on my side. Everyone will completely elated this
weekend, except for me. This weekend will be pure hell. -_-
Actually, Im beginning to forget what its like to be happy and enjoy life.
Because ever since I was given the title of President of the Music Club from
pOak (against my will), I still havent found peace to this very day. Whenever
everybody seemed to be happy, this pitiful president still had to run around
like a headless chicken trying to get things done.
What do I mean? Im talking about the Live Contest event that is happening
in a few weeks. Our club hosts this event every year. We use this opportunity
to find the best band in order to further our schools great reputations. Its an
open event, those that arent in the music club can join. Just because youre
a member of the music club doesnt mean youre the best there is. (Take a
look at Om, hes fucking dumb as hell.) (Aw, Im only kidding. Hes good at
somethingprobably?)
Even Earn signed up (and hes in the cheer team). This guy is actually a
pretty good singer. I tried wooing him into joining our club so many times. He
helped out sometimes and turned me down sometimes. It depends on
whether he has the time to spare. This time around, Earn and his club
members from the cheer team will be competing in this event as a band. I
bet hell have lots of fun.
Phuns name is on the list too, as a member of another band. (When did he
start a band anyway?) If I remember correctly, he plays the guitar. Hes quite
good at many musical instruments, actually. (He had a solo piano recital at
the Christmas even about 3-4 years ago, I think.) He almost joined the music
club too, but that guy is way too smart and capable. The Brother made him
join the student council instead, otherwise we wouldve been in the same
club. (Or maybe the basketball team? Now that think about it, he mightve
joined the sudoku club too. Or the mathletes? Basically, hes good at a ton of
things. I suppose hes better off working in the student council.)
Aside from those guys, there are about a million and 800 thousand other
people lining up to drop off their applications. I cant help but feel like theyre
just trying to create more work for me to do. Thanks a lot. (Seriously, you
guys dont need be so enthusiastic about this.) Next week will be the
preliminary round where we decide on which band will take the stage during
the Live Contest. I bet Ill be working until 3 in the morning for sure. (Havent
you heard of global warming? Its not a good thing.) (Actually, I just dont
have the cash to help school pay the electricity bills.)

Whats the matter, Noh? Youre being real quiet. Before Ive actually driven
myself into pure insanity, Phuns voice snaps me out of my (stressful) trance.
I flinch before I take a look out of the window. The landscape is now filled
with rice paddy as far as the eyes can see. Weve arrived in Ratchaburi as we
make our way to Hua Hin.
Quit being so loudIm trying to hear the ocean. I give him a lame excuse.
I can hear him chuckling while he is muttering something about being a
weirdo.
Heh heh, you all must be surprised as how I ended up here with him. Well,
we skipped school today! Im hitting pause on my duties as the president of
the music club for just a moment. (Im awfully popular as of late, everyone
kept telling me that they needed to talk to me.) Im sitting in Phuns black
car since we somehow agreed to go a trip to Hua Hin with the girls last week.
Truth be told, I think this is actually a good idea. I get to use this opportunity
to escape from those idiots with neverending problems. (P, is it okay if the
application is wrinkled? Can we fold the application? Id like to change
our bands name. Should we play Thai songs or English songs? We dont
have enough members, can we borrow from another band? Can my
girlfriend come see me play? My cat wont eat the tuna, what should I do?
You know what? Fuck you.) So now, Im sitting in the back seat behind the
driver. Naturally, Aim is sitting in the front passenger seat next to Phun while
Yuri and I are sitting in the back seat.
Noh. Eat this, eat this. Yuri thrusts a red Doritos bag my way. She had
prepared a bunch of snacks since last night. Of course, Id never turn down
food. I enjoy the snacks as I ask if Phun wants any. Yo, want some?
Bastard, youre asking as if you bought that yourself. Jeez, hes scolding
me instead? I was being nice, why are you being such an ass about it?!
Yuri giggles at our childish argument before she reaches over to give the bag
to Phun herself. You should have some, its a huge bag. Its not like Ill be
able to finish this whole thing on my own anyway. I glance at his stupidly
handsome face. Hes acting courteous at first for a while before finally taking
some for himself. Sometimes I do want to kick his ass when he gets so
obnoxious about things.
Would you like some, Aim? Phun turns to ask his girlfriend after realizing
that hes been letting her sitting there in silence for a long while. I take a
peek at the girl who has a slight annoyance look in her expression before she
turns to look out the window.
Im on a diet Im not entirely sure if thats a reply or just a statement that
she wants to share. Whatever, Im just going to get back to enjoying my
snacks.
We can be a couple of fatties together. Right, Noh? Yuri says with a wide
grin, revealing her adorable canine teeth. I cant help but smile in return.
Yup! Theres no need to be afraid of drowning in the ocean when we have
our own swim rings. I continue with the joke. Yuri bursts into laughter.
Our kids cant have a chubby tummy like us though. We need to make sure
theyre healthy.

Cough, cough, cough, cough. Im choking on the snacks! I have no idea how
to go from there. Theres nothing else I can do other than dealing with the
painful aftermath where pieces of Doritos flew out of my nose. Yuri is
laughing wildly, Noh, I was only kidding! Why are you that startled?!
Hahaha! Here! Have some water! She laughs as she hands me a glass of
water after she poured some from a bottle. Girls and their jokes these days.
Do you find it fun giving someone a panic attack?
I accept the glass of water as I glance at Phun who is sneaking a look
through the mirror. What the hell is so funny, you bastard?
***
Phun continues to drive while Aim, Yuri and I keep chatting along the way. We
make several stops at gas stations and leave with some snacks every single
time. (Yuri says its cheaper to stock up now than to get them at the hotel,
can you believe her?) At times, Yuri and I try on funny looking sunglasses and
play together very loudly. Meanwhile, Phun and Aim seem to be more on the
quiet side. No matter how many times I take a look their way, Phun is always
the one walking behind Aim.
We finally arrive at the resort late in the afternoon. Yay! I glance at my watch
and it tells me that it is currently past 3 pm. Phun and Aim are checking us
in.
This resort is so cute, isnt it? Yuri tells me as she gleefully throws herself
onto one of the modern style sofas in the lobby. She bounces up and down a
bit, I suppose shes having a lot of fun. This sofa is made out of squirrel fur!
Seriously?! You wouldnt believe how quickly I stood up from my seat. You
guys need to understand something here. Yuri is an animal lover, especially
the small critters. She adores them so much to the point where I think she
might work for Greenpeace after she graduated. That means that the idea of
putting any of these tiny animals through harm is a forbidden topic around
her. (One time, she stopped me from playing a Chip and Dale game because
she felt bad for them since they were being hit by apples.)
Not really. She finishes her sentence by throwing a pillow at my face. (I
definitely asked for it.) The two is us break into giggles as we joke around
with one another. This lasts for a long while before Aim and Phun get back
with keys in their hands.
What were you guys going? Aim asks with a smile as she notices that Yuri
and I are still being a little too loud. Yuri takes this opportunity to tell on me.
Noh is such a bully! I cant take it anymore! Are all the guys at your school a
bunch of bullies like this, Phun?! Hey! Dont lump the guys at my school like
that!
Phun smiles as me glances my way. It seems he finds something to be funny.
Just him, Yuri. This bastard is not helping me out at all. I squint at him
before I go back to messing around with Yuri. Youre a bully too. I wonder if
all the girls at your school are like this. Are they, Aim? Yuri hits me in the
arm a bunch of times after I asked that question. (Ow, that hurts.)
Aim is chuckling at our weirdness. Its nice how close the two of you are. So
you wont have a problem sleeping in the same room then? She hands one

of the keys to me. However, I am taken aback by this. I keep switching

between staring at the key and Phuns face, full of hesitations.
Phun himself has a troubled expression on his face too. Aim, I thought we
talked about this?
No, you did all the talking and assumed that I agreed with you. Oh, crap.
What happened between these two? Yuri and I keep quiet and look at one
another while feeling very confused. Phun and Aim continues their argument.
Well, then! If I had known that wed be spending the night in separate
rooms, I wouldnt have bothered coming on this trip with you! Aim raises
her voice pretty loudly which causes the staff in the lobby to start staring at
us. Phun shakes his head with some annoyance before he pulls Aim
somewhere else (that is less crowded).
Be right back, Noh. Yuri. He turns around to tell us. We stand in our spot
feeling completely bewildered.
Yuri throws herself back onto the sofa once again. I guess Aim wants to
share the room with Phun. I make my way back to join her while Im thinking
about how I dont really get how women operate these days and age.
Thats not really appropriate. This is what I think.
Why? Theyve already done it. Its not that strange for them to sleep in the
same room, Noh. Yuri continues to stick up for her friend to the point where
she has forgotten about other things if that were to happen. What about us
then? I hope that my question will trigger something inside her head.
Yuri goes quiet so I decide to say something. Its not a good idea for a guy
and girl to sleep in the same hotel room like that. Us guys dont have
anything to lose, but you two do. What if someone that knows your parents
saw that? Then what? I dont have the money to go ask for your hand in
marriage, ya know. I figure that ending with a joke would lighten up the
mood. Im gently patting her hair as she sits in silence. I really dont want her
to get stressed out by what I had just told her. However, I am taken aback by
what she is asking me.
Do you find me disgusting?
Why are you saying that?
Her round eyes are starting to get red to the point where Im starting to get
worried. Because youhave never touched me. Hey, dont start crying
now! A girls tear is a severe weakness of mine. I wish I didnt feel this way.
Hey, thats not a bad thing. Im only trying to be respectful.
You find me gross.
Do not.
Do too.
Do not.
Noh She pouts like a little kid when she realizes that she wouldnt win. I
cant help but chuckle at the way shes acting. Youre old enough, so please
try to understand where Im coming from. I tell her as I gently pat her head.
(Im not smacking her head like I would with Om.)
But I get jealous when my friendstalk about that stuff. I meanit feels like
theyre so in love with one another.

 I have no idea how to reply to her after hearing what she

had to say. I suppose its because I know for certain that I cannot give Yuri
what she really wants. Her eyes are red now. I can only clasp her small hands
to cheer her up.
Yuri sits there quietly before she continues. I know that youve never loved
me, Noh. No matter how hard I tried. You have never loved me. A tear lands
on the back of my hand and Im at a loss. By the time I snapped myself out
of a trance, Yuri is crying hysterically. I have no idea what to do now. Im not
good at calming a girl down. All I can do is tighten my grip on her hand.
Whats wrong, Yu?! Aims booming voice is coming from behind me. I look
up with a pleading expression on my face as I am desperately in need of
help. Both Phun and Aim seem to be stunned by what is happening. After a
while, Yuri gets up from her seat. Aim, I could use some rest. Im gonna head
to the room. She tells us before she grabs her luggage and other bags,
leading the way. Aim runs after her to unlock the door.
Phun stares at me with a perplexed expression as if he wants to ask me
something. However, he doesnt ask anything. Its probably because Im
shaking my head in disbelief so he takes me to our room as well.
We waddle our way through the hallway which is decorated in a very chic
and modern way. I had just noticed that this must be a pretty fancy resort. It
wouldve been pretty expensive if we were to pay for these from our own
pockets. The staff told us that our room is called Studio Piers and I was
confused as to why. I understood the reason for its name once Phun unlocked
the door. There is a private pool through the back of the room. (Its a pool
which connects between rooms.) My eyes twinkle once I see what lies
beyond the balcony. I bet that the girls must be squealing out of excitement
too.
I quickly throw the luggages onto the bed and inspect the room. It is
beautifully decorated. Theres an LCD TV inside the wall, a king-sized bed,
and even a half spa for a bathroom. This is quite luxurious!
I fail to notice that Phun is slowly putting his things away since Im so
amazed by the room that we get to stay in. So are you not gonna put your
things away? He shouts my way.
What for? Ill just take whatever I need when the time comes. Were only
staying here for a couple of days anyway. Were just very different people.
Phun laughs at my carefree way of life as he continues to put his clothes on
hangers and puts them in the closet. I can hear the girls squealing from the
next room.
I guess the girls are in a better mood now. Phun tells me with a smile. I
cant help but smile in return. Soon enough, we change our clothes so that
we can invite the girls to play on the beach since the sun isnt too strong
now.
While I was putting on the flip-flops, I suddenly get curious and decide to ask
Phun a question.
Hey I begin. He switches his attention from messing with the drawstrings
to look at me. What?

Why arent you sharing the room with Aim? I just want to know whats on
his mind.
He doesnt even hesitate before giving me an answer. Its not right. And Ive
done enough awful things as it is. He tells me while handing me towels for
the both of us. I feel better hearing his answer.
I pat Phun on the shoulder with a wide grin on my face. Personally, youre
not a bad guy anymore, you know. Because I figured if Phun had said that it
was because he wanted to sleep with me, then I wouldve punched him in
the face and hitch a ride back to Bangkok.
***
We leave our room and head next door to invite the girls down to the beach.
It seems like theyve been waiting for us already. I admit, I gulped when I saw
them in their bikinis. This is what they mean when they say the teenage
years are the best years of your lives, I guess?
It seems Phun knows exactly what Im thinking since he stomps on my
foot. That fucking hurts! What, I cant even look at your girlfriend?!
Lets take these thingies with us! Yuri excitedly tells us as she grabs a
beach ball and a huge floatie in the shape of a dolphin. I quickly rush over to
help her carry them. Im not sure if Im just imagining this, but it feels like
shes not even looking at me.
The four of us walk, rather quicker than normal, to the beach in front of the
resort. The spot where we are is not very crowded. Most of the people here
are foreign tourists. (Heh heh, exactly my style.) On the other hand, lame
locals like us rush into the ocean when it came into the view. Well, three of us
did. It is taking a while to convince Aim to join us.
Come on, Aim! This trip was your idea! Yuri shouts from afar, half of her
body are already under the water. Phun and I are already here waiting for her
as well.
No wayI dont know how to swim. She shyly tells us and we cant help
but burst out in a huge laughter. Which pre-school did you go to, Aim? How is
it that you dont know how to swim?! I can hear Phun laughing along with us
while Im still doubled over.
What the heck?! Its not even deep! And were not even swimming in it or
anything! Are you just gonna sit there and watch us?! Yuri continues to
convince her friend to join us. I watch as Aim nods her head along from the
shore.
Yuri shakes her body like a child throwing a tantrum before she grabs Phuns
arm. Phun, please talk to her? Please? Please? Come on? Please? Please?~
How exactly? Phun chuckles at the way Yuri is acting since shes holding
on to his arm very tightly as she continues pleading with him. Just do
whatever you can. Pleaseeeee?
Heh heh, how are you supposed to say no in this situation? (Im a prime
example of this.) Even someone like Phun cant even handle all this and
surrenders to Yuri. He gives in and walks back to the beach to where Aim is.
We watch as those two are discussion something. It seems like theyre
making an agreement of some sort. (Were playing in the ocean, not buying

stocks. You dont need to do all that.) Finally, Phun flashes a smile and a nod
before he carries Aim in his arms and runs over back to us.
Were here! The princess is here! He should before he throws his girlfriend
into the water. Yuri and I are laughing our butts off as Aim resurfaces and
starts yelling.
Phun! This is not what we agreed on! She protests as she hits Phuns chest.
Phun is laughing so hard, his eyes are nearly closed. Well, you didnt tell me
how you wanted to get into the water.
All of us were soaking wet since none of us wanted to be cold by ourselves. I
remember that Aim pushed Phun under the water as a punishment, except
he refused to go down alone. He used this thin arm, yet full of strength, to
pull me under with him. (I was choking!) Thus, this was where the multiple
attempted murders at the sea began.
We played loudly in the ocean for a long while before we headed back to the
beach and played with the ball that we brought with us. It was so exhausting
to play as an it and having to chase after the ball. It was even more
exhausting since everyone else refused to be it. They were having a lot of
fun tossing the ball around and making sure that I couldnt get it.
Even though it seemed like we were having a great time together, I noticed
that Yuri barely said anything to me. She wasnt even looking at me. Any
time our eyes happened to meet, she was always the first to look away. Im
not entirely sure if were having a misunderstanding about something so I
tried to act as normal as I possibly could.
Are you cold? I figured that I should try striking up a conversation with her
(even though Im not sure what it is were fighting about). I wade through the
water and head her way. Shes riding on that giant dolphin thing since we
were done playing on the beach. The wind is blowing quite a bit, I cant help
but get worried.
Umno. She barely gives me an answer. I find this very strange since Yuri
is normally a chatterbox. Its very hard to stop her from talking. But now? I
practically need to beg for her to say anything. So whats really going on with
her?
Something wrong? Youve been really quiet.
Ouch!
Before Yuri and I could have our conversation, Aim lets out a painful yelp. I
turn around to see what happened to the couple on the beach. I can see that
Aim now is sitting on the ground.
Phun inspects his girlfriends ankle before giving me a signal with his hands
to let me know that she twisted it. I nod as a reply and watch as Phun carries
Aim on his back before heading back to the resort.
Yuri stares at Aim, who is on Phuns back, for a long while before she turns
her attention back by kicking the water with her feet. The more I see her
nonchalant expression, the more annoyed I begin to get.
Yuri, were on a vacation together. You shouldnt get upset like youre a little
kid like this. I must sound very cold by the way Im scolding her because

she quickly turns around and stares at my face with a sour look. Im not a
little kid! She screams at me.
I have never seen her eyes glow in such a way before. To be honest, Ive
never seen Yuri this upset either. But today, she is very upset as if shes
incredibly mad at me about something.
I furrow my brows as I watch her climb off the giant dolphin. Im starting to
get curious as she stands there in the water with her eyes filled with anger.
But at the same time, they look like theyre trying to challenge me.
Are you really straight, Noh? Her lips move and those words come out of
them. She grabs my hand and places it on her breast.

CHAPTER 28: JUST

I quickly pull my hand back the second I realize what just happened. Im
starting to get angry. What are you doing, Yuri?!
Are you really straight, Noh? Instead of answering my question, she repeats
her question to me. She grabs my hand and makes me fondle her breast
once again. This time around, she digs her fingers deep and forces me to
squeeze it. Im shaking with anger. What kind of a guy do you think I am?
A pervert! She shouts at my face as she moves in closer daringly. I had no
idea that Yuri is this kind of a person.
Im very disappointed in you, Yu. I have nothing else to say other than
those words. I use one of my free hand to push her away before I excuse
myself and head back to shore. Im so pissed off that my entire body is
trembling.
I grab a towel as I walk on the beach to cover myself since I dont want
anyone to see the infuriated expression on my face. However, there are
quick footsteps coming up behind me before I feel a 45kg weight on top of
my back.
What are you doing, Yu?! Apparently, Yuri had decided to jump on my back
despite the fact that we just had a fight.
I love you soooooooooo much! She exclaims as she locks her arms around
my neck. Im completely baffled as to what is happening. What?!
Actually, I was wondering how Id be able to yell for help if you really were
gonna do something to me since the beach is full of foreigners. She ignores
my question as she continues to chat with glee. Between her giggling and
cheerful tone, I realize that Im not angry anymore. You were testing me?! I
hop a bit which sends Yuri flying before bouncing back. She screams in
delight.
Just a little~ Her small arms wrap around me a bit tighter now. I guess
shes afraid that she might fall off. Even though I was pissed off just earlier, I
cant help but let out some chuckles.
You wouldve been in trouble if you had done this with someone else, do you
realize that? Never ever test anyone like that in the future, understand?
Nevertheless, I feel I must remind her of these things. It really was such a
silly thing to do. Yuri continues with her giggle fit with no sign of stopping any
time soon.
Im so glad that I have you as a boyfriend~ She tells me as she leans her
head to touch mine. Eh? So I really am Yuris boyfriend?
Hey, Noh!
Hm? I almost forgot that we were about to arrive back at the resort.
Why is it that youve never told other people about how youre not really my
boyfriend? Ah, so she still remembers. How amazing.
Because you already told people that I am, how was I supposed to deny
everything?
Im such a cheater, arent I?

Yup! I quickly reply. Yuri hits my back right away. What?! I didnt say
anything wrong though!
You couldve been nicer about it. You know, arent you afraid that the girl
that likes you might misunderstand when you refuse to state otherwise? Oh,
so she realizes that too. Im kind of proud of her.
Nah, forget about that. I answer her as I think about why Ive been letting
this goes on. I didnt turn her down because I didnt want to embarrass her.
But aside from that, I thought having a girlfriend would help make my life
more peaceful. Back then, I used to play with the band. We held a
performance at the convents auditorium and it was completely insane. I
mean, I was glad that the girls loved us. But after the event ended, I kept
getting weird calls every day so I started to feel unsure about it.
I knew that youd be a gentleman. Youd never humiliate me. Good thing I
was the first girl to say that. I mean, you wouldnt have denied it if some
other girl claimed that you were her boyfriend. Ugh, I wouldve been so
sad. Basically, Im like an item on sale? Whoever gets their hands on me the
fastest wins?
I find this whole thing pretty funny. To be honest, I havent been telling
people otherwise simply because Yuri is a really great girl. Its not a terrible
thing to have someone like her as a friend. If this were someone who was
really annoying then I wouldve told her off the very first day she spread the
word about having me as a boyfriend.
We finally arrive at the area where we can rinse our legs and feet. I let Yuri
down from my back so she can wash the sand off of her.
Noh
Whats up?
Let me know when you finally found someone that you actually like. Ill help
you out. She tells me this out of the blue. Shes not looking at me though. I
stare at Yuri, who is washing her legs, before I let out a small smile.
Yeah, right~
Im serious. At first, I thought that if I kept pretending to be your girlfriend
then youd fall for me eventually. Oh, jeez. What kind of a logic is that,
Yuri? I cant help but chuckle at her ridiculous thought process.
Dont laugh. After a long while, I realized that you dont have any feelings
for me at all. Ultimately, I got over you and accepted the fact that itd never
happen. She tells me as she helps me wash the sand off my legs before
turning off the faucet.
Yuris smile is still as bright as ever. I cant wait to meet whoever that
person is. I wanna be the first one to meet the person that you like. I stare
at Yuris lovely smile which is full of warmth. Theres a tightness in my
chest. Why cant I just like Yuri? Shes so good to me.
As for the person I actually like? Well
Phuns face is the first thing that popped into my head, despite not knowing
what kind of feelings I have for him exactly.

Im unsure whether this feeling is love. But I know that I care about him a
whole lot. As long as he is beside me, there is nothing else in the world that I
possibly want.
Noh Yuri calls me my name after she finishes turning off the faucet.
Were still standing where the washing area is.
What is it? Arent you going to head inside? Its getting pretty chilly.
Will you kiss me?
.. Her twinkling black eyes are staring at me, as if
theyre pleading me for something. But
It wont make anything better, Yu. Itd be the for worse, trust me on this.
Yuri forces out a small laughter after hearing my answer.
I figured as much. How about a hug? Just a little one? I smile gently at her
choice to negotiate before I reach over to loosely embrace her. Its probably
best for you to go and find a good guy to fall in love with.
Youre the best guy there is though. She says in a muffled voice as she
holds me a bit tighter.
At times, I do hate myself for not being able to fall in love with Yuri.
***
The day is finally ending and I feel completely exhausted. Aim was able to
walk again so we decided to drive into the city to visit a restaurant and
gorged ourselves during dinner. By the time we got back to the resort, I
barely had enough energy to take a shower before throwing myself onto the
bed, feeling dead tired.
Im soooooo exhausted. I honestly dont know what else to say.
Phun is putting some things away. He turns around with a chuckle. I didnt
know you were driving.
Whatever! Fine, youre more exhausted. Okay? He didnt even need to
point that out. I mean, I get tired from just breathing. I replied back to him
sarcastically as I adjust myself on the bed before looking elsewhere. I can
hear his footsteps approaching me.
Gonna sleep already?
Yeah.
Then Ill turn out the lights. He doesnt wait for a reply before he turns the
lights in our room off. The only reasons I am able to tell that Phun is on the
bed next to me are the moonlights and the mattress sinking down.
Dont forget to pray before sleeping. I remind him, although I didnt turn
around to see if hed do it or not. I can see his shadows sitting down and pray
on his pillow just as I told him.
He pays his respects three times before he lays down next to me. I catch a
glimpse of him through the moonlight with his arm over his forehead.
Whats the matter? Something wrong? Anyone who has something
troubling them always does this pose.
I dont know He answers me with his arm still over his forehead. Silence
falls between us in darkness.


Somethings been bugging me today Phun begins to say something after
he stayed quiet long enough for me to start falling asleep. I flinch right away
and blink rapidly to chase away my drowsiness.
What? The fact that your junk stinks like hell? As expected, a hand landed
right in the middle of my head.
Wanna sniff it and find out for yourself, you bastard? Im talking abouthow
I saw you and Yurihuggingtoday. Phun takes his time to spit out each
word about something that actually happened earlier today.Hes pretty
observant, isnt he? So, how should I reply to him?
Jealous? I decide to tease him, and yet, Im the one feeling a weird pain on
the inside. You know that feeling of when youre trying to make light of a
really depressing situation? Its that kind of pain.
Phun sighs loud enough for me to hear. Pathetic, isnt it? He goes silent
for a moment before he continues. I dont even have the right to feel that
way.
I can only stay quiet when I hear those words. I really dont want to admit
that I felt sick to my stomach when I saw him carrying Aim around like that
too.
The two of us listen to the faint sounds of waves crashing into the shore. Its
like how I feel on the inside right now. Its as if theres a fist that keeps
smashing against my heart over and over
Do you love Aim? Suddenly, I ask him the question. I have no clue why I
choose to do that. I glance at Phun, who has a troubled expression on his
face.
I dont even know what love is like. I care about her. And IIm willing to
look after her.
Then thats probably love. Phuns answer is crystal clear. My brain is now
completely blank. I close my eyes even though Im already in a dark room.
Noh
. Phun knows very well that Im still listening even though Im
not answering him. He continues to speak in his deep voice.
Those things I said about AimI feel just the same for you, you know.
Why did he have say that?
Why did you have say that? I ask him the question, my own emotions are
choking me. There are so many things begging to be said deep inside me.
But I cant say them. I cant allow those things to slip from my lips. Not when
I kept telling myself not to ever say anything that would put Phun in a
difficult situation.
The two of us are quiet and very still. Then, Phun decides to grab me and
holds me close. I accept his embrace by wrapping my arms around him.
Because this is the only thing we have left now. This is the only reminder we
have that were still here for each other. And no matter what kind of a
relationship we end up having, I feel so at ease every time that we hold one
another like this.

NohIm sorry. He holds me tightly as he kisses my temple. I wish I could

control myself better than this, but I
The sound of his voice disappears, it has been replaced by the trembling of
his arms. Hes shaking so much that I must break free so I can raise my head
to look at his face. I can see his usual sharp features thanks to the
moonlight.
We look into each other eyes as if were trying to use them in order to
express how we truly feel. I cant do it either.
I tell him before I allow my own lips to gently take over.
Personally, I dont think we need any kind of labels for the two of us.
I just want him to stay by my side as long as possible.
This is all I ever wanted.

CHAPTER 29: THE RUN BACK TRUTH

The morning sunlight is having a hard time passing through the drapes since
I woke up around 6 in the morning and pulled the curtains closed already.
Why am I even mentioning this anyway? Well, my point is that I woke up
earlier, then I went to sleep only to wake up again just now. I check my watch
and I realize that it is way past 9 am, yet no one else is awake.
I raise the hand with the watch to rub my eyes before I let it fall to where it
originally was. Phun is still sleeping on my arm and I feel that I need to pull it
back since its a little sore. I cant help but let out a smile when I see Phuns
sleeping face, which is still tucked against my body. He seems to be quite
comfortable.
Well, I just cant help myself.
Slap!
Ahhhhwhyd you hit me?! He yells at me even though his face is still
buried in my chest before he moves away and rubs his head. I find this to be
really hysterical. Its already 9, are you gonna sleep until the day we go
back or what?
Phun seems to be pretty sleepy though. His eyes are shut tight as he listens
to what I have to say. His hand is trying to feel for his cellphone by the bed
but he cannot find it. Instead, I lend him my wrist so he can check the time
for himself. Its. Already. Nine. I repeat, just in case his eye boogers are
blocking his sight.
He furrows his brows and stares at the Diesel watch before he grabs my hand
and uses it as a pillow by placing it against his cheek. Wake me up at 10.
Fine, sleep as long as you want but I wanna go find something to
eat.Whatever, Im not gonna beg. I try to get up and shake my hand away
from his cheek but for someone who is sleepy, he is ridiculously strong.
He manages to pull me back down to where I was.
Noooo. Youre staying here. We can leave at 10. Phuns muffled voice tells
me from behind the pillow and my own hand.
Youre funny. Im hungry.
Lets sleep.
Lets eat.
Lets sleep.
I wanna eat.
Sleep Why is this bastard always so bossy?! (And will I ever win an
argument against anybody?!) I frown at him but his eyes are already closed.
Not only that, he mockingly cocks his brows at me too. So youre pretty
much fully awake, arent you? I really ought to kick you off his bed!
I mutter my insults while I use my free hand to grab the TV remote. I figure
that I can watch something to kill time, but then my poor stomach begins to
grumble.
Groans

This is just perfect. The stomach is making a louder fuss than its owner. Phun
immediately opens his eyes. Youre starving?
Yeah.
He lets out a roar of laughter (Im freaking embarrassed) when he hears me
reply. (Ill get you for this next time.) He finally gets up and stretches himself.
Fine, lets go eat. Lemme take a quick shower. Phun doesnt wait for my
response. He grabs a towel and heads to the bathroom. What the hell?! You
bastard, you woke up after me but youre just gonna get to wash up before
me?
I shake my head in defeat at his obnoxious behavior before I switch flip
channel from a Hollywood movie to the morning cartoons on channel 9.
Noh? Eh? What? Why the hell is he poking his head out like that? I turn to
look at Phuns handsome face, although theres a sly expression on it.
What the fuck do you want? Clearly, our politeness is on the same level.
Dont mind me. Im consistent when it comes to being crass.
What I witness next is Phun giving me a sweet smile as he motions his hand
for me to walk over to the bathroom. As usual, Im totally not in the mood to
get up. However, he insists and it doesnt seem like hed give up either so I
decide to pick myself up and go over to him before his hand gets sore.
Did you find a mermaid in the tub? I complain to him as I drag my feet
toward where he is. I am caught off guard when he pulls me in and kisses me
right on the nose. Fucking hell! He didnt even brush his teeth yet!
Morning kiss. He tells me before he shuts the door with a slam. You son of
aheh heh. Still, I cant stop grinning though. Heh heh heh.
Noh! Phun! Wake uppppp! Lets go eat! Lets go! The girls are yelling
outside before I have a chance to move away from the bathroom door. They
have such perfect timing, dont they? I cant help but chuckle when I hear
Yuris bubbly voice this early in the morning.
Whats up, girls? How come you didnt call to wake us up if you woke up
early? I open the door to see Yuri and Aim all dressed up with full makeup,
whereas Im still in my pajamas. (A pair of soccer shorts.) Yuri looks at my
face before she smiles brightly.
You look so cute when you just woke up! Your lids are all heavy and your lips
are so plump and red! Wait, are those really compliments you give to a
guy? I quickly shake my head to stop looking so sleepy. Im not sure how I
can fix the lips situation though.
I hear the sounds of Phun taking a shower for a while, then he opens the
door and hands me a toothbrush with some toothpaste on it . Are you really
talking to people when you didnt even brush your teeth yet?What? Was I
supposed to use sign language? I think to myself, but I accept the toothbrush
from him anyway without making any fuss.
The girls are having fun watching cartoons on the television as they wait for
Phun and I to get ready so we can go get breakfast. I guess its not really
appropriate to call it a breakfast at this point. My watch tells me its nearly
11 am. Maybe we should wait until noon and just have lunch?~ I say,
without directing this to anybody in particular.

Phun immediately turns his head my way. Oh, shut up. It was your loud
stomach growls that woke me up.
Is that true, Noh?! Well, this one is quick to piece things together. -_- Talk
about being a Core 2 Duo. Really, these two. I dont see why he had to
publicly humiliate me by mentioning that in front of the girls either.
The four of us had our meals at the resorts absurdly expensive restaurant
since we werent in the mood to bug Phun to drive us some place far as it
was pretty hot out there. I bet Om wouldve smacked me in the head if he
had read up to this part. He knows very well that Im not the type to be
considerate when it comes to this stuff. (Yup, he sure loves me) At any rate,
Yuri is the one to beat here.
PhunI want some snack~ There she goes. I glance at the girl who is
making tiny noises at Phun even though she had just finished a huge
breakfast. See that? I told you that she isnt too bothered when it comes to
this stuff. Haha.
Where exactly will you put those snacks, Yu? Didnt you buy a ton of snacks
before we got here? I ask her on Phuns behalf because Im trying to be
considerate to him. (I actually do know how to be considerate.) The sun is
really strong and the heat is unbearable. However, Yuri pouts at me with her
cheeks puffed up. All gone She tells me before she grabs a hold of Phuns
arm so she can continue pleading with him. (Eh? She is whose girlfriend
exactly?)
Please?~ Phun, I saw a department store on our way here. Lets go buy
snacks?~ Its not like we have anything to do at the resort in the afternoon
anyway. Pleaseeeeee?~ Its funny being the witness to this situation instead
of the victim. See how it feels now? Heh heh.
We can go. Aim, can you walk though? Right, I forget that Phun is such a
gentleman. He is also way too nice for his own good. Yuri turns around to
mock me by flashing a victory smile after she hears his answer. Fine, throw a
super-nice-and-caring-people party for yourselves.
I dont know. Ifeel like resting. Yuris smile fades after she hears the
answer from the girl standing next to Phun. Aw Its my turn to mock her
by raising my brows. Haha, no snacks for you.
But its okay. You should go with Yu. Ill wait here. Huh. That sounds kind of
strange.
Yuri quickly nods. Then Ill go with Phun! You can stay behind with Noh. Noh,
I know youre too lazy to go anyway, right? Eh? Um
Okay, that settles it! Check please! Yuri is being Yuri again, everybody.
Y____Y
***
After that, those two drive into the city, leaving Aim and I behind at the
room. Im over at the girls room to keep her company. Were not having any
serious conversion, theyre mostly small talks. Were mainly watching
television anyway. Im sitting at the edge of the bed with the remote control

in my my hand as I flip through the channel. On the other hand, Aim is

leaning down by the headboard of the bed. Truth be told, Im purposely
trying to put some distance between the two of us.
So how long have you been dating Yuri? She suddenly asks me this
question and I am caught off guard. How long has it been anyway?
Imnot sure.
How many months? Has it been a year yet? Im trying to think back to
when we first met. The concert at the convent was in June. When did Yuri
start going around telling people that Im her boyfriend again? I honestly
cannot remember. -_-
It hasnt, but I cant exactly remember how long its been. Heh heh. I
answer with an embarrassed chuckle. I still havent turned around to face
her, so I have no idea what kind of expression she is making.
Youre really adorable. Yuri is so lucky. Eh? I feel weird listening to what
shes saying. Nevertheless, I still need to be tough and hang in there. My
friend isnt handsome enough for you? Hahaha.
At this point, I can feel movements on the bed. Its the same feeling when
someone is making their way towards you. Its a different kind of handsome.
Youre like, the adorable kind of handsome. Is that a compliment? Im not
entirely sure. But when I turn around, I see that Aim is slowly crawling over to
where I am. My body is stiff. Im pretending not to notice by keeping my
attention on the television. A bunch of thoughts flood into my head. Golfs
words about how she would make the first move pop into my head once
again, despite how hard it was for me to try and forget them.
However, Aim is not moving any closer to me. She simply moves over here to
get off the bed before she grabs a scrunchy to tie her long hair. She turns
around and gives me a smile. Did you know that all the girls were screaming
their lungs out when you played at our school? I liked it too.
I let out a sigh as I nod at her with a smile. Frankly, if Im looking at the
bright side of things, then shes simply trying to have a conversation with
me. Its not fair of me to get so paranoid and being really prejudiced against
her. Her beautiful smile is putting me in a trance. If I had known that Phun
were close with you, then I wouldve invited you along more often.
I dont think it wouldve been a good idea anyway, I wouldve been just a
third wheel.
Definitely not, youre way too adorable. Hey, can you help me put this
necklace on? I cant see. Personally, I think shes going a bit too far with
telling me how adorable I am. (After all, us guys prefer being called
handsome.) I think to myself as I make my way over to help Aim with her
necklace. It only takes a second to hook it into place. But then, Aim quickly
turns around when I was done instead of giving me a chance to back away.
Thank you. Now our faces are only a few inches apart. I am startled since I
was not prepared for this. Not to mention that the woman in front of me is
smiling so sweetly, as if she is not bothered by any of this at all. Im confused
whether I should be the one who backs away or not.

Your lips are so redcan I touch them? Aim smiles as she leans over to
touch my lips with the tip of her finger. I stare at her daring eyes.
At any rate, I want none of this.
Do you wanna go take a long on the beach? I turn my face away before I
invite her to go some other place. I feel that it wouldnt be a good idea for us
to continue being alone together like this. Unfortunately, she outsmarts me
by saying, I dont think so. My ankle still hurts.
The smile on her face looks like it belongs to someone who is holding all
cards. Aims full and pink lips continue to move. Yuri is probably taking her
sweet time picking out the snacks. They wont be back for a while.
Right My head is spinning. The images of that clip keep flashing in my
head over and over. Im starting to feel dizzy.
That is until I watch as Aim takes off her white shirt. I snap back to reality
which is a lot clearer than that Golfs clip. I am stunned. I cant believe that
this is actually happening.
What I see in front of me is my friends girlfriend wearing nothing but a white
lace lingerie and a necklace.
Aim, what are you doing? This isnt a question. This is me trying to
remind the woman in front of me to realize that she should not be doing
something like this. However, all I get in return from her is a taunting smirk.
If you dont mind, then Id like for the two of us to meet up by ourselves
more often. Her slim body moves so close to mine that were touching. She
grabs my hand and places over her back where the bra hooks. Can we?
I know well enough that is is not a test like what Yuri was doing. Im a guy. I
cant deny that this risky and enticing experience is driving my raw appetite
crazy. Her wonderful scent is overwhelming my senses as she presses her
light and smooth body up against mine. Everything is letting me know what
she has to offer. All of these things are beyond ones ability to control their
hunger and desire.
Aim rubs her lips against my neck then up to my ear. At the same time, she
reaches under my t-shirt and aggressively runs her hands all over my chest.
My body stops responding to my commands. I can only hear Aim whispering
about how badly she wants me by my ear over and over as if she is chanting
a spell. A spell that seems to be working its magic too, since I start to run my
hot palms all over her back. Eventually I reach the bra hooks
This is my friends girlfriend!
That friend is Phun!
And Phun is someone who is more than just a friend to me!
AIM! I refuse to allow anything else to affect my conscience. My loud yelling
causes the owner of the name to flinch a little but she doesnt stop her
hostile advances.
Youre already in the mood though.
Aim! I shove her off me as far as my arm can stretch. I didnt want to do
this because I can see from her expression that a mans strength is hurting
her. But this is the only way for me to stop myself.

I take in a deep breath before I grab a towel and wrap it around her. Ill be
right next door. If you need anything, feel free to knock. You should get some
rest. I tell her, because I dont want to yell or scold her at all. I make sure
that Im properly dressed before I leave the room.
To be honest, I had nothing that I wanted to say to her.
The only person in my mind is Phun.
Because what Golf told me were all true.

CHAPTER 30: BECAUSE I KNOW

Golf was the person I decided to call right after I got home (alive) from my
trip to Hua Hin.
Actually, I wanted to call him when I was still there but I never got a chance.
During the day, Yuri was sticking to me like glue. At night, I shared the room
with Phun. I had no idea when Id have the opportunity to make a call to Golf
and ask for some advice so that plan was scrapped.
As for Golf? The first thing he did was shouting after he heard the story. Holy
shit! She had the nerves to go after you?! Yeah, my thought exactly. I dont
understand how Aim couldve been so brazen about it either.
I bet she was so sure that youd play along. She probably never even
thought that itd turn out like this. Golf continues to analyze the whole
situation from the other end of the line. I dont really give a shit what Aim is
thinking or how she might feel at this point. The only person I am worried
about is Phun. How should I handle a problem that I can no longer turn a
blind eye to?
The more I think about this, the more absurd this whole thing seems to be.
What about when Phun and I cried our eyes out that night? What the hell was
that for?
For Phun to go back and be with someone like her?
Fuck this bullshit.
Golf complained about something on the phone for a while (I couldnt tell
since I wasnt really paying attention) before he hung up. He told me that
hed come to my school on Monday after class since Ill be working late with
the Live Contest preliminary round anyway.
Im barely running on fumes by the time I arrived at school on Monday
morning. Phun didnt drop me off at my house until it was very late. After
that, I was on the phone with Golf until it was around 3 in the morning. (More
than half of our conversation were complete nonsense though.)
Yo! Whats with this haggard look? Its like you havent had anything to
drink for ages. You went to Hua Hin for three days, did certain someone
squeeze every single last drop out of ya?! Is he serious? I fucking hate Om
and his loud mouth. So did I show up to class just so I have to listen to him
spouting shit about me? Will there ever be a day that I wont want to curse
at his stupid ass? Well, at least Im not doing that today even if I wanted to. I
dont have the energy to fight with him. Instead, I throw a bag of stuff I
bought from Hua Hin as souvenirs at his face.
Om immediately goes from being an annoying asshole to a somewhat less
annoying of an asshole. Oh, shit! You bought food?! Oh, I love these! Keng,
get your ass over here and come try these! Jeez. You know how when you
throw a bone or something for a dog to fetch? This is exactly like that. If Om
had a tail, itd be wagging in excitement right about now. Not only that, he
calls out to Keng (who is boasting about something in front of the class) to
rush over. He speeds through, with his tail wagging, to my desk.

Shit, I really do love these cuttlefish. Theyre awesome. Om tells me as he

rips open a bag of sweet cuttlefish. I can only laugh at him as I watch.
Anything happened on Friday? The day I wasnt here? I ask him while Im
pulling out some scrap papers from my school bag.
Not really.Miss Patcharee asked about you though. I did you a favor by
letting her know that you ditched school and went to Hua Hin. What? This
bastard! He screwed me over!
I turn and stare at Oms face, but he continues with being a smartass. I
mean, you should probably give some of these sweet cuttlefish to her,
maybe she wouldnt be as upset. No need to thank us, by the way! I wasnt
planning to, goddamn it. I see how it is. Then all of these are for Miss
Patcharee. You can fuck off. I tell him and snatch the bag from his hand.
Giving these to the underclassmen in my club would be way better, I feel.
However, Om begins to make noises like a sad little puppy when I took the
snacks away.
I was kiddingggggggg. I told her that you were sickkkkkkk. What an ass.
Dont pretend to act all cute and shit, its creeping me out. I crinkle my nose
at those guys before I let go of the bag so they can get back to eating.
Yo, yo, yo. How did the trip to Hua Hin go anyway? Was it the first vacation
trip since you two started dating? Keng starts a new topic right when I sit
back down. Om is nodding along, being all supportive with the cuttlefish
hanging from his mouth. (Both of them, actually.)
So, did you do it? He doesnt give up, does he? I glance at the guys who
are still chewing on their snacks, feeling curious.
What do you mean by that?
Doing the deed! Om shouts at the top of his lungs as he stands up. Hes
obscenely banging his hands together in the air. Im so embarrassed that I
quickly pull him back down by the shoulders. Cut that out. We didnt do
anything. You already know that I dont feel that way about Yuri.
But you spent two nights together in the same room! You seriously cant tell
me that nothing happened! Were your balls chopped off?! Like, youre a
eunuch or something?! What the fuck are you yelling for anyway?! I smack
him in the head once to snap him back to his senses.
We slept in separate rooms, the girls had their own!
Om seems to be displeased by what he hears. Whats up with him? Jeez, I
thought you two were gonna make something out of it. Instead, you slept in
the same room as Phun and you let him have his way with you.Goddamn it,
Om. Cool it with that stuff, you asshole.
Real funny. What the hell is the matter with you guys? Why do you keep
saying that stuff about Phun and me? I yell at them while I grab a piece of
the cuttlefish for myself. The guys have a serious expression on their faces
for a long while.
Becausesuddenly, you two got real close pretty quickly. It wasstrange.
Yeah, emphasis on suddenly. There werent any hints or a slow build up.
Before, you two used to give friendly smiles to each other and that was it.
But now? You practically jump into his embrace whenever you see

him. Jesus Christ, way to exaggerate everything. You guys really need to
dial it back way down. When exactly have I ever done that to him?!
Youre really over embellishing everything. I just talk to him like normal.
Dont forget that he helped out with the club.
Still, it seems more than just that. It was his job to help with the budget
problem anyway. But then you two disappeared together and even you guys
girlfriends couldnt even reach you? Its just weird, man. Om continues to
analyze this scene by scene to the point where I feel like giving up. Seriously,
do you do this well when youre given a math problem?
I open my mouth to argue with him some more, but then Khom yells my
name and interrupts me.
Noh! Phun wants to see you! Fucking hell, speak of the devil. This cant be
happening. Now, Om and Keng are laughing their asses off. See?! I told you
so! You two are inseparable! Youre like a dung beetle and a pile of shit! Man,
I gotta give it to this guy. He came in late but he managed to steal my friend
away. Youre really something, Phun. Om teases, though it sounds like hes a
little sad by this. However, he doesnt seem to care very much since his
attention is on the cuttlefish. Well, arent you so sincere? Wait, did he just
compare Phun and me to a pile of shit or something? Ugh, screw it.
I shake my head as I shuffle outside my classroom where Phun is still
standing and waving. Hes trying to rush me to get there quicker. But like,
can you tone it down a little? My friends are staring and everything.
What is it? I ask him after arriving outside.
So will my band get to play in the prelims or not? Huh, so hes here
because of the Live Contest which he signed up for. I nod at him. But wait, I
just called and told Fi about this. (Hes the student council president and the
lead singer for that band.) I already told Fi though. Dont you guys talk to
each other? Youre in the same band.
You called him when he was asleep so he said okay to you but he had no
idea what you were talking about. Thats nice, maybe I should just
disqualify your band. -_-
I let out a chuckle. Today after school. The club room in the F Building. I tell
him this and Phun widens his eyes.
What?! So soon?! We didnt bring anything! What the hell? Your band
leader wasnt paying attention to me, how is any of this my fault?
He looks taken aback, as if Im someone holding all the cards. Thats your
problem. If you dont show up, then we cut you. That took some guts, didnt
it? The music club president is threatening the student council presidents
band. Heh heh heh. Bring it on. I dont know whatll happen, but this student
council secretary is totally looking defeated.
Are you really gonna do that to me, Noh?~ This jerk. You think that Ill feel
bad just because youre hanging your head like that? Why wouldnt I be able
to do that to you anyway?
Phun raises his head and looks at me. His eyes are twinkling, he must think
hes being really cute. To someone you love? Gross! Barf! Im gonna barf.
When the hell did I ever say that?!

Are you high right now?

Fine. To someone that loves you then? Oh, one second. He easily agrees to
change that line before he grabs the ringing cellphone from his pocket. I lean
on the wall and wait for him.
I could be brown, I could be blue, I could be violet sky~
Beep.
Hello, Aim. Welltheres the person that you love, and the one that loves
you I think to myself, as I usually do. But wait!
Aims on the phone?!
My expression quickly goes sour. Hearing her name alone already pisses me
off. I realize that Im practically fuming only because I do give a damn about
how this handsome jerk that is standing in front of me might feel.
I suspect that Im making it too clear because Phun is staring at me with his
brows raised. He looks at my frowning face with a surprise. I suppose this is
because Im not good at controlling my emotions. Whenever I think or feel
about something, it shows on my face. Right now, I feel like the word,
unhappy is written on my forehead while Phun has puzzled written on
his.
Yes, Aim. Oh, I dont think I can do that today. I need to stay and play for the
music clubs prelims event. Its very sudden. I look at Phun while he takes
his call. He still stares at me with his brows raised as if he wants to ask me if
something is wrong.
Yes. The one I told you about. Hm? Noh? He continues with the call to
which I realize that Aim is now asking about me. What is she asking? And
what for?
I furrow my brows as I stare at Phun who has a confused expression on his
face, both for me and for the person hes speaking to. Of course hell be
there. Hes the president of the club. Hahaha. Eh? Now it is Phuns turn to
furrow his brows. Why do you want to come? It wont be fun. Only my
friends will be here. Heh, now I realize what the person on the other line
wants. I even know the reason shes doing this.
Yes. Um, let me know when you get here then. Ill go pick you up at the
gate. We stand here for a moment as Phun bids his goodbye to his girlfriend
before finally hanging up. I watch as he puts his phone in his pocket. He
looks at me like he wants to make up to me for something because he feels
guilty. Are you madsince Aim is coming?
Im confused by his question, because what Phun is wondering is incorrect.
If Phun thinks that Im mad because Im jealous or Im possessive of him,
then Im confident enough to say that hes sorely mistaken. I never once
thought that he should be or is mine. Not even a little bit. Thats because Im
man enough to know whats what. Im confident enough to say that Im
satisfied with my current relationship with Phun. Im satisfied that we have
these wonderful feelings for each other without the need to define what it is
we are or or having to deal with stuff that happens in a bedroom.
I love what we have now, but I hate what will happen next.
I wont stand for someone hurting the person that is very important to me.

No, Im not mad or anything. Youre reading too much into it. This reply
may seem like Im avoiding the subject, but I am trying my best not to make
Phun worry.
So youre okay with this? Im sorry. Phun squeezes my shoulder lightly
which causes me to quickly nod at him. Hey, it really is okay. I gotta go and
copy someone elses homework. Lots of catching up to do since I wasnt here
on Friday. In the end, I need to rely on a huge lie (since Om already told me
that there wasnt anything at all to do on Friday) as an excuse. I figure that
its better to go rather standing here with a pissed off look on my face. I
dont want Phun to misunderstand and think that Im mad at him.
Right. Sorry, Noh He repeats himself. I nod hastily as I gently pat his
back.
Dont worry about it. I tell him before I head back inside the classroom.
And of course, I definitely know the real reason Aim wants to come all the
way here and watches over Phun.

CHAPTER 31: FACE TO FACE

Miss Mettha dismisses our class just as my phone vibrates on my desk.
Fortunately, everyone is being quite noisy so she isnt aware that the iPhone
is causing big a tremor against the desk.
I take a look at the screen and think about how Golf has such a perfect
timing. Where you at?
Almost there, come get me. What the heck? Dont act like you never went
to this school.
Hilarious. Meet me at club room in the F Building. I gotta prepare the
prelims event so Ill be waiting there, k?
Not okay! I gave up my precious time for you when I could be hitting on
chicks. You better get your ass over to the gate and come get me. Im almost
there, see ya in a bit! And this jerk is another person in my life that makes
assumptions about things and forces people to agree with them. (What is up
with these people this poor Nohs life? Will he ever get his way?!) Golf hangs
ups and I put my phone away in defeat before making my way to meet him
at the gate.
Om, mind setting things up there for me? Ill catch up to you soon.
Per usual, this bastard has a problem with this. What the hell, man?! Where
are you going?! We gotta start soon!
I know. Itll only take a second. I gotta go get Golf, hes on his way.
Om gets excited at the mention of Golfs name. For real?! Okay, you go get
him so I can kick his ass. He was mixing fish sauce for me to drink the other
night at Lumphini Park. It was fucking salty. Im not letting him off the
hook. Hahaha, you two can sort this out on your own!
I rush over to the schools gate since my watch tells me that it is almost time
for the preliminary round to start. However, I dont even see as much as
Golfs shadow. That fucker, didnt he tell me that he was almost here? I
complain to myself.
While I wait for him, a light-skinned girl who is wearing the convent uniform
from afar is stealing my attention. Whos that? I can tell that shes pretty hot
even from this distance. If I get to see up close? Whoa, I dont even wanna
imagine it. I keep staring as the figure moves in closer and closer with
excitement, like any other teenage guys would be like.
But

Goddamn it. Why didnt I realize this sooner? I watch as Aim walks over to
the schools gate and I am forced to pretend like I dont see her, simply
because I dont have anything to say to her. I can tell that shes looking my
way too.
And of course, aside from the security guard, Mister Suchart and other
students leaving the school, I dont see anybody that resembles Phun at all.
That means, Aim and I must stand here as we wait for the person that were
supposed to meet. Honestly, I dont really care that shes standing around
here. I no longer bother with any forms of politeness since Ive lost all
respects for this woman due to my personal experiences with her.
I lean on the gate and whistle, looking completely content with myself. Im
not even saying hello, hoping that this might piss her off. I glance at her and
it seems like she is pretty annoyed by this. I look at her seemingly beautiful
face and I know right away that she came all the way here so that she can
keep Phun away from me. I bet shes afraid that Id rat her out.
She has no idea that I wouldnt do that. (Im not that kind of a person.) If I
wanted to tell on her, then I wouldve done so back in Hua Hin. If I were that
tough, then I wouldnt have called Golf so he can help me think like this.
Speaking of which, when the hell will he get here already?
Soon enough, a purple taxi parks by the sidewalk. I can see Golfs tall figure
digging around to pay for the cab fare to the driver. He steps out of the car
with a wide grin, still wearing his personal attire since his school allows that
sort of thing.
Sorry, man. The traffic was god-awful in front of the Mandarin Oriental. I
dont know what the hell was going on. He hastily gives his excuse,
probably because hes afraid that I might snipe at him (which I was about to).
However, before Golf and I can make our way inside the school, our eyes
catch the sight of Aim who seems to be very startled.
Right, of course shes startled. I had just realized that when Aim met Golf,
she had no idea that he used to go to this school. Heh heh, its going to be
fun today. Theres still one person missing though.
Speaking of which, Im telling you that this guy must be psychic. Hell show
up at the mere mention of this name or if you happen to be thinking about
him. Just give him a few moments. Oh, Noh. There you are. Om was
complaining about you. See? Phun Delivery. Think about him and hell show
up right away. Let the fun begins. I turn to smile at him while he is jogging
over to where we are. I can see that he is out of breath. He was probably
rushing to come get Aim.

Phun takes a breather before he notices the person standing next to me.
Golf! Youre came to watch too? There we go. I bet that Aims like a
character in a horror movie right about now (where she sees the ghost).
Golf seems to be enjoying this as well. Yeah, Noh asked if I wanted to come
so I decided to drop by. What are you doing here anyway? Arent you
supposed to be getting ready?
Oh, I came to get Aim. Aim, this is Golf. He used to go to his school. Hes
real close to Noh. He and I used to hang out too. At this point, I just know
that Golf and I must be wondering what kind of a reply Aim will give to Phun.
I see. Its nice to meet you. Wow, the nerves of her.
You look familiar, Aim. Golf throws her the first punch. Haha! I want to give
him an award, this is so satisfying.
Aim is taken aback, but I can tell from her eyes that she wouldnt surrender
that easily. Phun brought me here before, I suppose we mightve walked
past each other before. Oh, another award winning liar. I guess Ill need to
give out two trophies.
But before we can go any further, my phone starts ringing and signals the
end of the first round of battle.
U-Wo-U-Wo-Oh.
I wasnt thinking of anything.
Youre cute so I came to introduce myself.
The LCD lights up with the photo of Oms middle finger. What? Theres no
need to be polite when I answer his call, its a total waste of energy.
WHEN THE HELL ARE YOU GONNA GET HERE ALREADY?! ITS ALMOST TIME
TO START, DICKHEAD! Om is being loud enough that even Golf can hear
him. I promptly reply that Im on the way there when Golf shoves my back.
Better hurry. Youre the club president, you shouldnt be late, man.
Oh, what the fuck? This is your damn fault!

***

I rush back to the club room and am greeted by Om, who has a menacing
look on his face. Ha, dont think that someone like this Noh would be afraid
of that.

What? I was only gone for a second. Did you really have to call me? Its
obvious to me that Im only making this worse by getting smart with him, but
Im doing it anyway. The result is a fist landing squarely on my head.
Bastard, dont get smart with me. Get your ass over there. Theres a
problem with the amplifier. Hmph! Ill let you off this time. I hastily take Golf
to sit and wait behind the judges table before I make my way to check the
amp that Om told me about.
We didnt take too long setting everything up before we begin. This
preliminary round is a closed event since were choosing which bands will get
to compete live on the stage later. I had told all 35 bands to meet up in this
cramped club room. We told them that they could not bring their own
instruments, which meant that they are forced to use the ones our club had
provided. (Thered be no room and wed end up wasting time if each band
needs to do their soundcheck.) Im afraid that Ill be spending the night here
by the time the last band gets to play.
Jeezare we really letting them play two songs? Cant they just do one? I
start making a fuss from the judges table when I calculated how long this
event will take. Om quickly scolds me. You were the one who told them to
play two songs! I told you that one would be enough! Were gonna be
spending the night here, goddamn! Sure, kick me while Im down. Well, I
thought it wouldnt be very fair if we judge a band after one song back then.
But now, Im starting to feel like I want to change my mind about that. Y__Y
Time passes by ever so slowly, at least thats how it feels to me. Even though
all these bands are great, having to sit here and score them for each and
every song is freaking exhausting. Im starting to understand what pOak
(the previous music club president) went through. Fortunately, I closed the
sign ups early. Otherwise, wed be dealing with 50 bands like pOak did last
year and be forced to judge these bands to death, literally. (Seriously, it took
two days last year, we were living on Red Bull.)
I stretch myself to chase away the drowsiness while glancing over to where
Phun and his band members are. Aside from a ton of buzz-cut male students,
theres also a beautiful convent student named Aim sitting among them. She
is sitting right by the door and I notice that she often asks Phun to leave the
room with her. When they come back, theyd carry a bunch of drinks and
snacks with them. I cant help but get curious. Is Aim off her diet or is she
just trying to keep Phun away so he cant just sit there and stare at me.
Because every time I glance that way, my eyes would meet Phuns puppydog eyes, as if hes trying to make up for something. How many times do I
need to tell him that Im not upset, Im not mad, and Im not jealous or

anything? I just get pissed off when I see that woman who is lying to you
sitting here. Do you get that now?
SighI dont know what else to say. So lets just say that Im trying to be as
normal as possible.
I think Phun thinks youre upset with him since he brought someone to a
closed event. He keeps looking at you and making those sad faces.Look at
that. Even Golf, who is sitting behind me, notices it. Good thing he isnt
nasty like Om. Golf looks at me as I shake my head before he grinds his
teeth. Im dying to just walk over there and tell Phun all about it right here
and now. What should I do?
Yo! Chill out. Hes already acting like he wants to crawl over where Phun
is. This damn guy! I swiftly hold him back because I know full well what a
hot-blooded dude this guy is.
Soon after that, a 9th graders band finishes playing their set, (they were
pretty good, actually) so I need to let go of Golfs shirt collar and announce
the next band that will be playing. Next is the band number 15PQueers
Band. What a name, Earn. Earns band will be playing next. A bunch of
people (especially the junior high kids) are laughing at their choice of the
bands name as they seem to like it. The entire band is made up of the cheer
staff from the soccer event. The underclassmen usually address them as
pCheer, but pQueer is used behind their backs (because the staff can be
pretty mean and strict). Earn actually heard this term used with his own ears,
but hes not angry about it because he used to refer the cheer staff members
as pQueer too. Hahaha. (Where I come from, this is called karma.)
They did a short soundcheck (not much to do since our club had prepared
everything already) before they start their first song, which is Change by
Deftones. Ive heard Om listening to this song often. I guess theyll be getting
a really high score from Om alone. Speaking of which, dont underestimate
Om (even though I do this again and again) because his father plays for a
major symphony orchestra. Hes also a music professor at Mahidol
University to boot. Basically, Om isnt exactly without talent, his only issue is
that he tends to act like hes stupid, causing people misunderstand him. (Or
maybe he really is stupid, Im not certain.) I take a peek at his score card and
let out a smirk.
Thats cheating.
Theyre really good! Om loudly exclaims as he tries to hide his score card. I
can only laugh at him. It is true though, Earns band is playing very well. Earn
is great as the lead singer. Its too bad that this song is a bit too slow and
emo, Im about to fall asleep at any second.

Just as I am at the brink of my decision whether to just fall asleep or not, I

hear my name from the speakers. Noh, please dont fall asleep yet. There is
one more song. Jeez, Earn. Youre really doing this to me? Im so
embarrassed! I flinch and scratch my head as I stare at his face. Meanwhile,
everyone breaks into laughter (Ill get you back for this). I take a sip of water
to hide my embarrassment (and drive away the lethargy).
Earn grins widely, showing his dimples before he continues with the next
song. Listen to this very carefully, Noh. I guess hes afraid that I might doze
off again.
Hack, the drummer, rhythmically taps on his drum sticks before the guitar
begins playing the first few notes of the second song.
Too close, I dont want to get too close
I dont want to go there yet
Its probably alright to stay at this spot
Too clear, if this is too clear
It may not be as touching
This is probably not too much, is it?
Id rather slowly get close to you
Little by little, Ill trickle in until I find your love
Its not time for you to know how I really feel yet
Allow me to dream and live this fantasy for a while longer
This is good enough even though things are uncertain
It may be only a small dream of mine
But Ill continue waiting
If we get any closer
Then I am afraid that youd back away
And never return
Id rather slowly get close to you
Little by little, Ill trickle in until I find your love
LaLaLa
Its not time for you to know how I really feel yet
Allow me to dream and live this fantasy for a while longer
This is good enough even though things are uncertain
It may be only a small dream of mine
But Ill continue waiting
If we get any closer
Then I am afraid that youd back away
And never return

Oh, youd go away and never return

Im not ready to get too close just yet
Eh?!
I mean, I do like the band Friday. (I dream about having a smooth and
dreamy singing voice like pBoy Thrai.)
But
Why is Earn staring at me while he is singing? Im getting so embarrassed
that I need the avert his gaze!
It seems like Im not only one who notices this either.
Holy shit, Earn! Youre flirting with our boss by singing a love song in front of
all these crowds?! There he goes again. Om yells loudly once the song is
finished. -_- Asshole, this is so humiliating! Couldnt you have waited until
everyone had left before you make such a fuss?! Im so embarrassed!
I faceplam myself while peeking at Earn, who is still standing there with a
smile, accepting Oms teases. What?! You too! Denying it wont let anybody!
Id be totally thankful! Dont just stand there and willingly be Oms target!
Since Earn isnt saying anything, Oms mouth decides to work overtime. Its
too bad though, Earn! My boss real guy is already heading your way! Phun is
so gonna kick your ass. Bastard! Youre dragging more people into
this?! However, Om is right. I watch as Phun walks up behind Earn, but
theres a logical reason to this. His band is number 16 and is supposed to be
playing after Earns band so theyre just setting everything up. I look at Phun,
who has a smirk on his face, but he is not saying anything. He passes Earn to
grab the guitar and gets into his position.
Smack!
You really need to watch it, dont just run your mouth off like that. Dont you
see that Phun brought his girlfriend to watch him?! Thank you, pDew! You
tell him. I turn to laugh when pDew shuts Oms shitty mouth up by hitting
his head with the coffee cup. Om is now pathetically licking his own wounds
by rubbing the spot where he was hit.
Sorry! I forgot. Everyone breaks into a laughter once more while Om
apologizes to Phun with a wai. The student council secretary quickly accepts
Oms apology before waving him off, letting him that he didnt mind.
Although, Phuns no longer looking my way.
Shit, now how am I supposed to judge this band? If I dont let them through,
I might get kicked out of the school or theyll definitely cut our clubs budgets

next year. Gee, werent you apologizing to him only a second ago? Now
youre talking about them by whispering to yourself?And when Om whispers?
Youd still be able to hear him even if you stand at the schools gate. Another
round of laughter breaks out in the room.
This time, its Fis (the student council president and the bands lead singer)
turn at the microphone. I wont give you hell if you dont let my band
through. But if you get smart with me then Im gonna hold your 20k. Oh,
what a prick. Hes using our clubs weakness to threaten us. I actually cower
for a moment, but Om lets out a victory chortle.
Im not scared! Phun already gave us the money! Hahaha! Dumbass, why
did you tell him that? -_-
For real?! It seems that Fi is unaware of what his student council member
has done. He has a shocked expression on his face when Phun gives him a
nod, letting him know that this is true.
Fi mutters something to himself by the microphone which everyone can hear
thanks to the speakers. Goddamn it, Phun. Youre actually trying to get with
Noh after all? And its back to us again! You assholes need new materials!
Look at that. Even the junior high kids and the seniors that dont even know
who I am are laughing along too. Whats the meaning of this?Y____Y There
goes my image. Everything Ive ever built went to hell thanks to these
bastards.
I flip my middle finger to those guys, not knowing which names I can call
them at this point. Phun seems to be pretty relaxed about this whole thing.
He checks the strings on his guitar before he turns to let the drummer (who
the heck is that?) know that theyre ready to begin.
At any rate, its pretty clear now that Phun is not looking at me at all.

CHAPTER 32:
Basically, it was way past 10 pm by the time we finished. I thought I was
going to go insane. The schools security guard kept coming over and told us
to leave. Seriously, it wasnt like we wanted to stay. We wouldve gotten
ourselves home if it werent for all these bands! The longer this went on, the
sleepier we got. Om and I kept taking turns nodding off the entire time.
I look down to check my Diesel watch. It tells me that its a little over 10:30
pm now and were still cleaning up the club room. Golf and some 10th
graders, who were the last band to perform, are staying behind to help out.
The other bands left after they had played their set. I mean, who would be
crazy enough stay until the very end (aside from us judges T_T)?

Oh, there is one crazy dude that stayed behind though, and that would be
Earn. Hes helping Om cleaning up in another corner of the room. He chooses
to stay behind because he wants to help out, or so he says. Its not like I
have a problem with that. This is a good thing. Itll mean that we can finish
up faster so we all can go home earlier.
Are you guys curious about where Phun is? Well, he already fled home after
his band finished playing. (I see how it is.) Although, he did ask a 9th grader
who was around to let me know that hell be back to come get me. I guess
he left to take Aim home. Heh heh, I really wanted to tell him that he doesnt
need to come back (Im being considerate) but I didnt get a chance since he
left before I could say anything.
Hey, Noh! This sofa right here is ripped a little! Do you wanna mend it now
or wait until tomorrow morning?! Om shouts at me from the other end of the
room. We had moved the long sofa there earlier since we were afraid that it
might get damaged but it apparently did anyway.
This really sucks. Yeah, Ill do it now. Gimme a sec though! While I am
yelling a reply to Om, I feel someone tugging on my sleeve with a force.Oh!
Its just Golf! Goddamn, I thought it was a ghost. (Although this isnt that
different.) He flicks my arm rather hard, and pokes his head in close. Hey, I
gotta run or my dad is gonna yell at me. You should take these before I
leave. Right, I almost forgot the reason he came over. It wasnt just a
regular visit like how we were yelling everybody.
Golf and I leave the club room and head downstairs. Everything is pitch
black. Fortunately, the nice security guard left a light on for us so he and I
are having our chat underneath it.
I totally get it now. Its really hard to bring it up to him. Golf begins. I let out
a sigh with a heavy heart since I feel as awful as he is. Exactly. I dont even
know what to say. I dont even wanna bring it up because itll seem like Im
purposely trying to break them up.
I bet Aim came here today so that you cant talk to Phun. I saw that he was
walking over to you but Aim kept diverting his attention. I didnt notice this
since I was busy with the judging. (Well, I was sneaking in a nap here and
there.) But I sort of understand that anyone would do the same. However,
doesnt she realize that Im at school with Phun the entire day? I can go up to
him whenever I wanted. Is it not obvious to her that since Phun still doesnt
know about this, it means that Im not a tattletale?
I cant tell him. I honestly dont know how I can tell him.
Yeah, but what will you do? Are you just gonna let this go? Golf asks me
with a weary expression on his face. I can tell that he is worried about Phun
no less than I am. This is one of the reasons why I respect Golf a whole lot. To
the teachers, he might be a terrible student in their eyes. For us, he is always
such a great friend. He and Phun arent even close, but he still cares so much
for him.
I dont want to let this go. Ill try to bring it up at the right time. I reassure
Golf as I pat his back. He gives me a nod before he takes a CD out of
his pants pocket.

Here, take this. In case proofs are needed. I asked my buddies and got my
hands on 4 files.
Holy shit, 4 files?! I was so pissed off watching just one, but there are three
more? I feel like I need to tie myself up for a while or I might physically hurt
Aim.
Yeah, 4 clips. Can you believe that? There are actually more, but I dont
want Phun to go into a shock. So take these for now.
Hell definitely go into a shock. I think Ill only show him just the one. I
mutter quietly as I accept that godforsaken CD from Golf.
Golf lets out a long sigh. Thats up to you. Just take this for now. He stares
at me before he pats me on the back a couple of times to give me some
moral supports. Fighting. I really have to get going though. I bet my dad is
already complaining.
Want me to walk you out?
Its fine. Go fix the sofa. Youre probably not gonna get to go home tonight,
heh heh. This bastard. Thanks for the well wishes. I flip him the bird as he
leaves the building. I put the CD in my pants pocket while I make my way
back to the club room.
Now, Om and the underclassmen are the ones getting ready to leave. What?
You guys are done already?! I quickly protest.
Yeah, we were hauling our asses. If we stay here any later then were gonna
end up spending the night here. Om complains with his hands on his waist
as he glares at the underclassmen as if he wants to rush them to finish up
even faster. I give them a melancholy look. Are you really
leaving? Goddamn, cant you at least stay and keep me company?
Yeah. Sorry, man. My mom will scold me until my ears go numb. I gotta take
Mum home too. I dont want his grandma to yell at me in Chinese again. Not
that I can understand what she says anyway. Om tells me. He turns around
to pat the head of a chubby boy who happens to be his neighbor. He is
grinning widely at me. Well, I guess it cant be helped.
Okay, okay. Make sure the rest of those kids get a ride home. Take care of
them, alright? I leave Om with those words before he transforms into a tour
guide as he leads a bunch of kids outside. Om may be a complete weirdo,
but those kids love him to death. I dont have a clue why. I guess he can still
be charming even when he gets on peoples nerves.
In the end, it is just me alone in the club room with the clock on the wall,
which says that it is nearly 11 pm, keeping me company. I begin to wonder
whether I should spend the night here or not. I still havent fixed the cushion
for the sofa yet. Sigh, my pitiful life.
Noh! Lets finish up with the sofa so we can go home! Ah, a ghost! Whose
voice is that?!
I turn to see that Earn is still here. He has the sewing kit in his hands. Youre
still here?! I ask, feeling surprised.
How can I leave? Youd be here alone then. He tells me with a smile. Im so
glad that Ill have someone keeping me company. Thanks, man!

***
Some time has passed and Im still fumbling around with the needle and
thread, trying to repair the light blue cushion. Im so close to finishing, yet it
doesnt feel like I am. I suppose I keep messing up because Im so sleepy.
Everything is a blur.
Earn is still waiting nearby. I can hear the sound of him flipping through the
manga. At first, he said that hed help me with this. But after we reviewed his
lack of sewing skills, in which he was about to sew himself onto the cushion,
we figured itd be best if he sits there and keeps me company instead.
Youre pretty awesome. You actually know how to repair these stuff. Can I
hire you to fix the ones at my house too? What? Did he get bored reading?
Why is he getting smart with me? I force out a chuckle but Im not looking at
him.
Sure. But Im quite the superstar so my fees are pretty high.
If its for you, Im willing to pay anything. Hm?! I quickly turn my head to
face him when I hear what he had said. Hes beaming at me. I feel like
throwing up because this makes it sounds like Im some sort of a prostitute.
Can you not mess with me like that? Its unnerving. Dont get me started on
when you were singing. Truthfully. I wanted to let this jerk know that Im not
that innocent and my mind is in the gutter at times. At any rate, I dont want
to get into it.
I hear Earns loud chuckles. He places his elbow on the cushion and rests his
chin using his hand as he continues to watch me work. So youre not gonna
read? Youre just gonna stare at me like this so Id feel self-conscious? What
the hell are you staring at? Go back to reading your manga. Youre making
me feel tensed.
Earn responds with a laugh but doesnt say anything else. He continues to
watch me sew the cushion when I prick my finger with the needle.Ouch!
Goddamn him, I told not to stare at me like that! This hurts like hell!
Owwwwwwww.
Oh! Sorry! So you really were tensed? Are you seriously asking me that?
You try sewing something while someone stares at you, how about it?
Goddamn it, Earn. Before I can curse him off, Earn takes my bleeding hand
cradling it with both of his hands. He leans in close to take a look.
Shit, be gentle. That hurts. I complain since it hurts more now that I can
see the blood. Im not sure if its the pain or my own fear that is getting to
me. Ah! Do you think my intestines can make its way out through this hole?!
While I keep making a huge fuss (personally, getting prick by a needle and
getting stabbed by a knife is the same level of pain), Earn covers the wound
with his handkerchief. Its only a needle. Youre screaming like youre giving
birth. Get a hold of yourself. He scolds me as he puts some pressure on the
finger. He blows on it like one would when theyre trying to calm a small child
down. There, there. Youre okay now.
Dont start with that shit. Im not some idiotic kid, you asshole.

Well, you were throwing a fucking tantrum like an idiotic kid. This jerk!
Maybe I should disqualify your band right now for accusing me of being an
idiot. I glare at him and it seems like he realizes this.
Hey, hey! You better not cut my band just because I called you names.
I was thinking about it. Heh heh heh.
What an asshole! There, there! Please dont mind me, khun Noh! Youre so
smart! Youre perfect in every way! In wealth, physically, emotionally, and
mentally too! Pfft! Id rather he calls me names than having to listen to his
sarcastic remarks about me. I turn my attention back to repairing the
cushion, but an idea pops into my head. Im still not over what this sincere
(note the sarcasm) Earn has done for me. I turn back with a weapon in hand
(the needle) in order to execute him. Haha! Youre leaving this place full of
holes!
Im not a sadist, but I just need to get this out of my system. This Noh will
make sure that Earn will shed blood tonight! Youre dead, Earn.
I quickly prick his arm with the needle in successions while he dodges my
attacks. He laughs and yells loudly at the same time. I take his chance to fire
an insult back at him. Jeez, its only a needle. Youre screaming like youre
giving birth! Get a hold of yourself! Doesnt that sound familiar? Heh
heh. Now he understands how painful getting prick by a needle can be!
Earn continues to struggle, but he still argues with me. This is not the same
thing! Haha! Ow! Stop! I cant take it anymore! Noh! Noh! Im sorry! I wont
say anything anymore! Just me go now! Ow! Hahaha! He proceeds to cause
a fuss while laughing in between. The noises we are making fill up the empty
room. I begin to have fun with this and forget about fixing the cushion. Earn
gets his hand on a spare needle and starts to retaliate. Were in a tangle, its
chaotic.
Earn is a fucking sadist though! Ow! Maybe he should prick me in the
stomach and let some of the air out so I can have a six-pack! Haha!
As we continue to poke each other in the stomach, the door suddenly bursts
open with no warning or even a knock.
Earn and I are startled (thinking that it might be a ghost). We turn our heads
to the direction of the door.
Theres a tall figure standing there. Its Phun Phumipat, who happens to be
showing up at 11:30 pm. He has a strange sullen expression on his face.

CHAPTER 33: JUST A SLIP

Still not finished yet? Illgo wait outside then. This is what Phun said to
me 5 minutes ago before he left without even stepping inside the club room.
Earn and I blink at one another, we realize that its time to stop
goofing around and finish mending the cushion before it gets any later.
Whats he doing back here? Earn asks me with his deep voice while I am
still focusing on the sewing.
WellI didnt think that Phun would actually come back to get me like he
had said.
I dont know. He did mention that he was gonna come back. I didnt think he
was serious though. I complain as I follow up with the stitches. Im not
looking up, so I have no idea what kind of expression Earn has.
Right, Ill go get him. He should come inside. There are probably a ton of
mosquitoes out there. Thats a good idea. I silently agree with him. I didnt
get a chance to say anything since I heard the sound of the door opening
and he stepped outside.
Youre just gonna leave me here all by myself like this?! Thats way too
cruel!
I increase my sewing speed since I am faced with this situation. Now that
Earn isnt in the room, it is eerily quiet. I keep glancing around
fearfully.Goddamn, Ive never hated that piano before until now. Seeing that
there in a silent and dark room does not help one bit. It feels like Im in a
Hollywood horror movie setting.
Itd be best if I finish this up as fast as I can! I comfort myself by realizing
that I am nearly done. I squint my eyes and stare at a small gap. I rapidly
stitch up the cushion. Forget about making it look pretty (as if that was ever
my concern), I just want to get home!
As I am sitting here, I begin to wonder why Earn is taking so long. Didnt he
say that he was just going to invite Phun inside? They better not have
ditched me! I realize that the more I wonder, the more time I am wasting so I
decide to just focus on the task in front of me. Ill worry about those two
going missing later.
Soon enough, I finished repairing the cushion. It may not look nice and
professional (I mean, I only cared about closing that gap) but its still better
than actually hiring someone to do this. We need to spend our budget on a
bunch of other things.
I stare at my handiwork, which I find to be satisfactory, before I start packing
up the needles and threads. I glance around the room only to find myself
standing alone in the midst of instruments, sheet music, and the food that
the underclassmen left behind.
So wheres Earn?! He said he was gonna go get Phun! T____T You lied to me!
I think to myself, feeling betrayed and afraid at the same time while I clean
everything up. I grab my school bag and I rush out of the club room.

As I am putting on my shoes, my heart nearly stops when I spot a strange

shadow in the hallway of the F Building. Its past midnight, theres no way
anyone would be walking around now. I notice that the shadow is moving in
closer.
Holy shit!
Mama! Papa! Help me! Im sorry that I didnt listen to you! Im sorry that I
misbehaved! Im sorry that I always get home so late and that I ride the bike
around at night! Im sorry that I dont call you when I spend the night at a
friends place! I promise Ill be good from now on! I wont do anything to
make you upset anymore! Please help me! T[]T!
While Im losing my mind and banging my head against the wall, I can feel a
warm hand touching my shoulder. Im shaking even worse now. Im dead. Im
so dead!
What the hell, Noh?! What are you doing standing there shaking like a leaf?
Dont you wanna go home?! Wait a second. That voice sounds familiar. I
slowly turn my head to see the source of the voice. Earn and Phun are
laughing their asses off.
Fucking hell! I thought you guys left! Its so fucking scary!
Youre scared of ghosts. The guys are gonna have a field day making fun of
you tomorrow. Earn teases me by pointing at me and laughing.Whatever!
Wouldnt you be scared too?!
Its your damn fault, Earn! Didnt you tell me that you were gonna get Phun?
But then you were gone so I assumed you went home. I continue speaking
and swat his hand away. I turn my attention back to putting on my shoes, I
can hear Phuns deep chuckles.
We were chatting and lost track of time. Right? The handsome student
council secretary nods at the president of the cheer team. I can see Earn
grinning widely, showing off his cute dimples as we make our way to the
schools gate.
Once we arrive at the gate, Earn turns around to ask us a question. Oh, so
how are you all getting home? Phun, youre dropping Noh off, right?
Yeah.
I stare at Earns face as I am thinking, then I remember that his house is on
the complete opposite side from our homes. How are you getting home,
Earn?
Ill just hail a cab. You guys take care. He says as he waves at a taxi that
happens to be passing by just in time. I wave goodbye when the taxi drives
off. Now, it is just Phun and I standing here waiting for a taxi of our own.
I glance at his face, noticing his sharp features with a hint of exhaustion and I
grow concerned. Arent you tired? Having to go back and forth like this? I
can see the fatigue on his face. I wouldnt want this young master to fall ill
again, his parents are going to start accusing me of torturing him.
Im fine. How can I just let you go home all by yourself? Jeez, hes being
such all kinds of chivalrous again. Look at that, hes giving me an encore of
those sweet gazes.

I let out a huge sigh. I always go home alone, so dont get all dramatic on
me. There isnt much I can do other than voicing my complaints. Phun
chuckles softly just as a taxi is passing by.
To Ekkamai, please. Phun tells the cab driver. This means that hes
dropping me off first since he lives in Thong Lo. I hear the driver muttering a
reply, then Phun opens the door wide to let me get in before him. Way to
treat me like a lady. Im too sleepy and too tired to think too much of it so I
climb inside.
The meter is clicking along while the radio is playing softly. I listen to the
slow song, it only makes me drowsier.
Let me just sneak in a nap. Phun knows the way to my house anyway, I dont
think I need to stay awake. Once my brain processed these thoughts, my
eyes immediately close.
Just as I am about to fall asleep, I hear a deep, yet cheerful, voice coming
from Phun. Long day, huh?
Mmm Its all this sleepy person can muster.
Phun continues with the questions. How was my band? We were good
enough?
Mmm I still only have enough energy for a one-word reply.
Are you hungry? Should we stop somewhere and get something to eat?
Ugh, whats with the questions? I just shake my head as a reply at this point.
Im too freaking sleepy.
However, Phun doesnt pick up on this. How about the congee in Thong Lo?
No Im sleepy, dont you get that?
Phun goes quiet for a moment before he starts speaking again. Nohare
you mad at me?
What?! This wakes me up a little. Im wondering why the hell I would be mad
at him. I dont have a single clue. What a bunch of nonsense. Plus, Im way
too sleepy to think about anything else. Nooo.
Hey, Im sorryabout Aim. Sorry? Why is he apologizing? About Aim? What
about her?
I furrow my brows but dont give him a reply since I figure that it isnt that
important. But it seems like Phun misunderstands this.
Hes giving me these overly long excuses instead. Shes the type that if she
wants to go somewhere then shell get there no matter what. Even if I had
said no to her, she wouldve shown up anyway. Do you know what I mean,
Noh?
Mmm Oh, thats what hes talking about. I didnt think any of it and I do
understand him.
Noh. Please dont be like this Well, if I wasnt mad before then I am about
to be.
What? Theres a hint of annoyance in my voice.
I dropped Aim off because I had to. But with you? I came to get you because
I wanted to, Noh. Dont be pissed at me like this.

This student council secretary is way off the mark. I already said that I
wasnt mad so I wasnt mad! At this point, my patience runs dry. I suddenly
open my eyes wide and stare at his face.
My lips move faster than I can think. Look, I didnt mind. I dont give a shit.
You can bring her or take her wherever the hell you want to. Thats your call.
Do you get it now? I dont give a flying fuck what you do!There! Hopefully,
hell understand and let me sleep now. After I told him, I think (or assume)
that everything is all cleared now up so I close my eyes, hoping to get my
rest.
Before I can fall asleep, I hear a monotone voice coming from Phun.
Right. It was silly of me to assume that youd care. I forgot for a moment
that I actually dont mean anything to you. I cant even be compared to
Earn. Eh? That doesnt even have anything to do with this. I wake up with a
frown and look at his odd expression when I hear the last sentence.
Whatd you say? But before I can get my answer, the taxi stops in front of
my house.
Phun grabs my school bag and hands it to me and then he tells me, Sweet
dreams, Noh. However, the look on his face is the complete opposite than
what hes telling me.
Im so sleepy. Im so confused.
Did I do something wrong?
But never mind. Im awfully sleepy. I just want to get to my bed. Zzzz.
***
After sleeping for six hours, my body is starting to feel refreshed and
energized like before. How did I get home last night again? I cant quite
remember. I recall Phun being in cab with me. Once I got home, I flung my
shoes and socks off and went upstairs. I didnt even take a shower, it was
utterly disgusting.
Sleeping helps with my mood though. Im also very glad that the prelims
went smoothly. Its a big relief.
I walk into the school with a huge smile on my face this morning. As I whistle
a cheerful tune, I spot Phun with folders in his hand, heading to the main
office. And like usual, I automatically wave at him.
Buthe isnt waving back at me. He stops to stare at me for a short moment
before he disappears into the main office.
What the hell is up with him?
I stand here feeling stunned when nong Mawin (Pers best friend from the
club) greets me respectfully. Huh, maybe Phun didnt see or did something
has gotten into him again? Whatever. I turn to accept nong Wins greeting
and we head inside together, although Im still curious.
After that, the day went by in an oddly familiar way. Phun noticeably gave
me the cold shoulder. I thought something was off this morning when he
didnt wave back like he normally does. He even completely ignored me
when he was heading to class. There wasnt even a glance.What the hell is

going on with you?! Do you suddenly need glasses?! Whatever. I became

aware that Im being given the cold shoulder but Im not as sad about it this
time around because Im still so bewildered.What exactly did I do to him?!
I decided to prove that something is definitely off by submitting a project
proposal in person at the student council office (I usually have an
underclassman doing this kind of stuff) because I really do want to know if
hes ignoring me for real or not. (I even brought Om along, just in case) Once
the two of us got there, he was typing away on the keyboard. His attention
was on the screen, he didnt even look up at me. Then he coldly told me,
You can just leave those papers on the desk.
What the hell, man?!
Hmph! Dont think that Ill try to make things up with you!
I left the office feeling very irritated because I realized that it was clear that
Phun was giving me the cold shoulder. Even Om had something to say about
it. The fuck are these married couple fighting about now? Can you just go
patch things up with your husband or wife or whatever? This is so
annoying. What?! Why should I be the one doing that?! What did I do
wrong?!
It has been a sucky day so far because that jerk kept giving me attitude.
Whenever we saw each other, he kept glancing downwards while looking
upset. (Seriously, what the fuck?) I had no idea when I stepped on his tail.
Since he was giving me attitude, I decided to do the same in return. The
problem was I couldnt give do that to the person specifically so I ended up
giving attitude to everyone that happened to be around me. I threw a fit
when someone barely did something that rubbed me the wrong way. I was in
a foul mood and I had no idea how it got that bad.
Just think carefully. What the hell did you do to him? At last, Om can no
longer take any of this (since hes the closest, he got the worst of it) and
decides to ask me during the lunch break. He is probably so annoyed since
Ive been grouchy since this morning. Well, if I had known what I did to Phun
then I wouldnt be this grouchy!
I dont know! I didnt do anything. Ugh, Im over it.
So did he actually come back here to pick you up last night?
Yeah, he did.
You two really are like a married couple. So did you do something to upset
him while you two were doing it?
Fuck you. We got into a cab and he dropped me off at my house. I was
sleepy, I cant remember much. Right, I was so sleepy but he kept trying to
talk to me on the way there but I cant remember what he was talking about
exactly.
And then what? Keep thinking, asshole. It seems like Om is paying very
close attention to this, doesnt he? But hes not. Hes just saying things while
lifting the bowl to sip the soup, leaving me going insane alone with my
thoughts.
Anyway, what happened in the cab again? Then what happened? Well, he
kept trying to talk to me and I got really pissed off so II

Look, I didnt mind. I dont give a shit. You can bring her or take her
wherever the hell you want to. Thats your call. Do you get it now? I dont
give a flying fuck what you do!
Oh. Fuck. Now I completely understand. Those words are replaying inside my
head like someone hits rewind. Im fucked. I had just only realized how harsh
I was with him.
Hey I quietly get Oms attention once I recognized what I had done.
What?
I remember what I did
And? Did you do something wrong?
I did Om lets out a sigh. He wearily shakes his head at me.
He puts down the chopsticks. Then go and make it up to your husband or
wife. Ive had it up to here with you. You kept yelling at people and then you
turn around and you have that sad puppy look on your face. Youre a mess,
kinda like when my mom is on her period. Just hurry up and go patch things
up with him, man. This bastard. Not only he chases me away, he kicks my
seat from under the table too. Goddamn you! You think youre so
tough?! This is a long bench, so a couple of underclassmen sitting on the
other end flinch because Om kicks it rather hard.
Yo, you scared those guys.
Yeah, yeah. Just get out of here. Im gonna head to the club room. Im
teaching nong Mick how to play the horn.
What the hell, man? Rumor has it that Film is real protective of that one.
Well, Film doesnt know how to play the horn so he asked me to help
instead. Can you not start shit with me? Go patch things up with your dad.
Om tells me as he waves me off. He gets up to collect the bowls so I stand up
at pat his shoulder twice.
Alright, see you in the afternoon.
Yeah, yeah. He brushes me off before we both go our separate ways to
deal with our own things.
I leave the cafeteria in a daze since Im not sure where I can find the person
Om lovingly refers to as my dad. Does that jerk even eat lunch at our
cafeteria? I didnt see him. It wouldnt have been hard to spot someone like
Phun Phumipat if he had been there. Maybe hes having lunch over at the
convent again? Now what? Should I call him first? Butif someone had been
that harsh with me, I wouldve blocked and deleted their number the second
after they had said those things.
Why do I run my mouth off when I get sleepy anyway?! Im about to go crazy
here!
I wonder as I smack myself in the head as punishment for saying those awful
things. While Im walking around aimlessly, I spy the back of the student
council president not too far from where I am.
I run up to him in a haste. Fi!
Yo! You scared me! What is it, Noh? Oh! Is my band is through to the next
round?! Jeez, dont get all Psycho on me. I frown and stare at the person
with a wide grin on his face, revealing his braces in all their glory.

Youre funny! The results arent out yet! Wheres Phun? Where is he? This
is what I wanted to ask him.
Fi gives me a puzzled look as if I had said something I shouldnt have said.
Hes been hanging with you a lot lately though. So if you dont know where
he is, I certainly dont.
Well, he got mad and ditched me. I dont know where he is. Can you call
him and find out for me? Come on, come on, come on? I begin to act like a 3
year-old who is clinging to an adult because he wants a toy. Fortunately, Fi is
nicer than most people. When I pull this stunt, people usually shove me
away.
Whats with you two? Like, youre actually quarreling? Uh, give me a sec
then. See? This student council president is worth being friends with. I stand
and wait for Fi as he makes a call to the student council secretary. It doesnt
take long for the other line to answer the call.
Yeah, Phun. Where are you? Yeah, yeah, where are you? The gym? Okay
then. Are you gonna be there for a while? Oh, its nothing. Someone is on
their way to see you. Yeah, yeah. Just stay here. Heh heh. Yeah, okay.
Thanks so much, Fi! I hug him by the neck and shake violently after he
hangs up the phone to show my appreciation. (Is this really the best way to
do that?) After that, I rush to the gym just as I had heard him say.
Once I arrive at the gym, I see that Phun really is here. It seems like hes
getting ready for the physical education class since he has changed his
pants. I know that he saw me because he looked at me but then he had the
nerve to look away. How long are you gonna keep this up?!
I stand here awkwardly for a moment until someone calls out my name. Oh!
Noh! But it isnt Phun. Its Thum, Phuns classmate. He used to be our club
but he had to quit last semester because his father thought that he should
be focusing on his studies instead. My pa is like that too butI dont listen to
him. Hahaha. (Sorry, Pa!)
Howve you been, Thum? You havent stopped by the club room at all,
man. I greet him just as he walks over to me. I notice that Phun runs off to
play basketball with his friends without so much as looking back at me.
Thum shoves my shoulder lightly. Bullshit, Ive been dropping by. Youre the
one that hasnt been there lately. What the hell kind of a club president are
you? Oh, really? Hahaha. Its true that Ive been popping in and out lately.
Fortunately, I have Om staying behind like a spirit haunting the place. Hes
been keeping me up to date on things, otherwise Id gotten chewed out my
the seniors. I let out a dry chuckle and he continues asking me questions.
So what are you doing here? Are you here to see someone?
Yeah, I came to find Phun. Can you get him for me? Hes being an ass right
now. Leave it to me to slip in an insult here and there. Well, he is being such
an ass though. Hes not willing to hear me out at all.
Whats with you guys? Thum looks confused but he turns around to call out
to Phun for me anyway. Phun! Phun! Phun! Phun! Phun, you goddamn
dickhead! See? Hes being an ass even to his own classmate. I pity Thum for
having to shout so loudly to get Phuns attention that hes nearly hoarse.

Okay, he definitely is being an ass. Ill take care of this. This time Thum is
the one feeling pissed off. I can tell because he races towards Phun in the
middle of the basketball court in the gym. This is quite satisfying to watch.
Those two exchange some heated words before Phun walks over to where I
am with a weary expression on his face. What do I do now? What should I
say to him?
How may I help you, Noh? Jeez, and he shows up speaking formally to me
like this? It is gonna take forever to patch things up with him.
I begin by being myself. Sowhat the hell were you doing?
However, Phuns reply is less than favorable. Swimming,
perhaps?Goddamn it, cant he take this seriously?!
Fu I almost cursed at him but I decide to stop myself since Im here to
make up with him so I need to be nice. Fun? You having fun? I switch to
the a different word.
Phun seems to be taken aback by this, probably because he doesnt know
how to answer. Usually, he would say something obnoxious in return. But this
time he is very still. He isnt playing long. Im starting to feel dishearten.
I decide to just scratch my head and get to the point. Heywhy are you so
mad? I didnt mean those stuff I said. Last nightI was really sleepy. Come
on, dont be like this.
Silence. The number you have dialed is currently unavailable, please try
again later. It seems like he isnt even listening to what Im trying to explain
to him at all. He turns around and nods to his friend in the court before he
turns back to face me with a cold expression.
Is there anything else you need? I have to go. Liar. The lunch break wont
be over for a long while. What? Is it such a hassle to stay and talk to me? At
any rate, I dont want to keep pestering since he might get annoyed.
Yeah. Go ahead Even though I tell him that he can leave, I cant help but
feel hurt by this deep down inside. The moment Phun turns his back
intending to walk away, I suddenly feel frighten and at a loss.
My hand moves faster than my brain can process and I grab his arm. Hey
What? He asks me, sounding quite hostile. Y___Y Feeling a little dejected, I
search my pocket for a piece of candy that I often carry around with me and
share it with him.
Herein case you get sleepy later in the afternoon. Itll help. Hey, this is a
priceless treasure, you know!
I hand him the candy. Im not sure if Im seeing things, but I swear that Phun
cracks a small smile before he goes back to being stone-faced. Yeah
thanks. He tells me simply before he accepts the candy and walks away
from me. Ugh, he gets upset too easily!
I even came all the way here to try and make up with you. If you insist on
staying angry then Im not gonna bother trying anymore! Blah!

CHAPTER 34: OUR DAY

Well? Reconciled with your dad yet? Om immediately asks me when I step
into the room. How did he get to the classroom before I did anyway? Didnt
he tell me that he was going to teach nong Mick how to play the horn?
Never mind that, how come youre back here early?
I chased him away. I told him to go and learn how to play the khlui first then
well talk. That bad? -_- Heh heh. I find Oms weary expression to be funny.
Sure, hes a complete idiot when he hangs around his friends, but hes super
strict with it comes to the underclassmen. At times, hes way more focused
than I am. I cant help but let out a chuckle once I learn about the unlucky
underclassman before I sit on my chair and look for the textbook Ill need for
the next class.
I guess they didnt make up if he has that look on his face. Om mutters to
himself as he turns and looks through his school bag. I quickly turn my head
in his direction.
Why?! Whats wrong with my face?!
You look so goddamn depressed, go take a look in a mirror. He pushes my
forehead with his finger. Hey, Im not a little kid!
Im still pretty damn hot no matter how many times I look in a mirror.
What a dick. Either youve been staring into a trick mirror or you have a
really low standards when it comes to good looks. This bastard. Rude much?
Seriously. Whats really going on between you and Phun? Om suddenly
asks me something that Id rather not discuss. If I were taking a drink, I
wouldve done a spit-take. Luckily, lunch break is over so all Im doing is
looking at him with wide eyes, in total disbelief.
Whatwhat do youmean byreally going on?
Om shakes his head in an irksome way while he points at my face with his
index finger. Look at yourself. Can you act any more suspicious than you are
now? Youre probably the easiest person to read in the entire world. Well?
What the hell is going on with you and him? Ive been noticing weird things
between you guys for a while now. So this jerk has been collecting
information. I look at Om, who is giving me a death stare. Hes pretty much
pushing into a corner, it is something Ive never had to deal with from him
before. I know that I cant wiggle my way out of this one even if I avert his
gazes.
Were friends, of course
For real?
Yeahhhhh.
So if I were to get mad at you, would you go out of you way to make up with
me like what youre doing now?
Wellyeah, I would. Maybe? Im not sure. A part of me is yelling at me to
just kick his ass instead.
Om glances at the way Im behaving before he continues. I wouldnt get
mad at you like this though. Its not something friends do. Uh
I avoid Oms stares once again and repeat what I said earlier.

Were friends
This causes Om to let out a very loud sigh. He shakes his head and turns his
attention back to the textbook.
Its your business. So if you dont want to tell me, thats your call.
Aw, come on! I dont need another person being mad at me! Dang it! T___T
I sit with a brooding expression on my face as I begin to contemplate about
my relationship with Phun. Well, we really are friends though! We may have
done things beyond the scope of friendships but were still just friends when
you look at it. Sigh. Thinking about this is really wearing me thin.
Before I can finish contemplating, a rough hand is patting my head for a
couple of times.
You can tell me whenever youre ready, Ill listen.
Om tells me. Even though hes not looking me, I always know what a good
friend he always is. ^_______^
***
The judges decided to meet up in the club room after school has ended so
we could tally up the points and decide on which bands will get to compete
during the Live Contest event. This is a big headache because there are
plenty of great bands, but if we allow all 35 bands to perform then everyone
from the judges to the people watching will puke to the sound of music. (I
nearly passed out yesterday.)
I still think pOaks band is the one to beat this year, man. They were so
effing awesome during the prelims. Art says as he looks over the total
scores for a band called All Star. POak, the previous president of the music
club, belongs to this band. I personally think they did a terrific job too.
Dont underestimate other bands just yet. Maybe theyre saving their best
for the contest. I tell him while I continue to add up the scores.
However, Per is now the one howling away. Heh, you like pEarns band,
dont ya? Oh, this bastard. What are you referring to? What are you trying
to say? I turn to stare at him with a confused expression on my face.
What are you on about?
Well, pEarn sang that song for you, hehehehe. Goddamn him! Way to
cause trouble for me! I notice the seniors who were not there yesterday all
turn around and look at me.
For real?! Earn, the president of the cheer team?! -_- Aw, crap.
I quickly give an excuse. Per is talking nonsense. If you believe him then you
should also give birth to yaks too.
But I do believe him! What happened, Per? I wouldve been there if I had
known! I am so touched by your considerations, pPong. You wanted to be
there so you couldve experienced it for yourself. It is truly touching. T___T
Well, its like this. PEarn sang this English song and then pNoh fell asleep.
After that, pEarn woke pNoh up and told him to pay very close attention.
Then pEarn started singing Too Close and had these dreamy looks in his
eyes. Like, you could tell they were filled with love. Ugh! Ooooh! Ahhh! This

bastard needs to be reined in, hes completely delusional. I need to shut him
up now before things get any worse.
What a bunch of nonsense, Per. I asked you to come here to help with
adding up the scores, not to make up stories. You take this pile and get
started on them! And dont use a calculator so youll keep your mind busy on
the task instead of going off on a tangent. Even though I assigned him a
workload, he still has the time to send signals to pPong using his face. _-This damn kid.
We didnt take very long to finish adding up the scores for all the bands. We
went from 35 bands down to 15, to which Id like to offer my sincere
condolences to the other 20 bands. Hopefully, theyll be able to participate
next year.
I give the list of bands to Ngaw (the clubs slave) so he can type them up
while we chat and laugh among ourselves (this is a very important process).
After the list is printed, we post it on the club rooms door so that everyone
can easily check the results for themselves.
I look at the band called Mafia on the list (Yes, thats the name they chose.
Its nice that theyre self-aware) while I think about the guitarist with the sour
expression on his face. I cant help but feel like
NoIm not going there to make nice with him.
Im only going there to let him know that his band made it throughthats
all. Yeah.
***
I told the guys at the club room that Im off to use the restroom and that I
would be back soon even though Im planning to go way farther than that. I
hastily put on my shoes and run out of the F Building, heading to the new
main office building. Howeverthat jerk laying down the bleachers looks
awfully familiar.
I tread my way over to see young master Phun laying there, unafraid that his
uniform might get dirty. This is the stuff that uncultured kids do, you know
(me included). I stop in front of him and see that his eyes are closed. Just as I
am about to wake him up, he suddenly opens his eyes.
Yo! Yet, I am the one scared out of my mind. Goddamn it!
Phun seems to be just as startled as I am to see me standing here. He slowly
gets up and dusts himself off. I notice that he cant get all the dirt so I move
in to help him but he leans away from me. Ugh, youre still mad?!
What is it, Noh? He asks coldly. I cant help but shoot him an annoyed
glance before I rudely sit next to him since he has not invited me to.
Why are you sleeping out here? Dont you prefer the air-conditioned room in
the student council office? I ask him, using the normal and casual tone of
voice, as if nothing has happened between us. Phun is expressionless.
Mmm. Jeez, he isnt even arguing with me. This is bad.
I glance at Phun, who is still not looking at me. I start to wonder whats so
great about those 7th graders that are playing soccer while waiting for their

moms to come pick them up because Phun is focusing on them. From the
side of his face, I can see that he still has a blank expression and I have no
idea how to react to this. All I can do is stare at my own shoes instead of
Phuns impassive face, (Although, my shoes and his expressions are kind of
similar now that I look at them.)
So when are you heading home? I ask him, just in case that I might hit a
jackpot and he agrees to leave together.
Dont know.
Wanna head home together?
.. Hes being quiet. What does this mean? T__T
Im not giving up and continue to march onward. Did you get a chance to try
that candy?
.. I can only hear the sound of the wind blowing and the kids
playing soccer. T______T
Ugh, I honestly dont know what to do anymore! Im getting real annoyed
now so I look up and stare at his face, just in time to see a smile quickly
fading away. Wait. What? Maybe hes not mad at me anymore?
I take it as a good sign so I scooch closer to him and touch the back of his
hand with my pinky. (Dont ask me where I learned this from, I dont have a
clue either.) HeyIm sorry. Dont be mad at me. I really didnt mean what I
said. I was just sleepy. Come on, come on, come on. While I keep nudging
his hand with my pinky, I can see the owner of said hand is trying to stifle his
laughter by turning his head away. Heh heh, youre such a pretentious jerk!
I decide to jump from where I was sitting and stand on the lower level of the
bleachers. Even though I try to get into his line of sight, Phun continues to
dodge me by turning away. Goddamn it, you must think youre so adorable
or something. Did you learn this from your little sister?
Lets make up, Mr. Handsome. Ill treat you to some desserts. Please? Come
on, come on, come on?~ I try to win him over with the mention of food
(since this usually works with me) but Phun is still playing hard to get. He lets
out a sigh and puts a frowny face. Im starting to get irritated. This special
promotion is over!
Fine, whatever! You do what you want, Im out. I only came to let you know
that your band made it through. Congrats. Hmph! Hes lucky that I even
bothered to do all of this. I dont even do this stuff normally. Ugh, Im just
gonna head back to the club room. I hiss at him before I turn around so I can
head back to the F Building, but then Phun reaches out and grabs my arm to
stop me.
Ah, come on. You couldve kept trying a bit longer. You were being so
cute. This asshole has the nerves to say that to me? Well, its my turn now.
Im not gonna talk to him and I wont face him either.
Phun continues to tug at my arm a couple of times and asks me to turn
around. Dont think that Ill give in that easily, heh heh.
Hey, Im not angry anymore. Im not mad at you anymore. Dont be like this,
Noh. I thought we were okay now? Come on! Turn around? Come on, come

on. He keeps shaking my arm with no sign of stopping. This is hilarious. Heh
heh heh. But right now, its my turn to get back at him.
How about I treat you to some ice cream? The shop near our school?
Interesting proposal, but not very appealing just yet.
Oishi Buffet. I give him a counter proposal. He smacks me in the head,
naturally.
Yeah, because those two are definitely in the same price range. Wait, isnt
he supposed to be making things up to me right now? At any rate, Im
getting tired of standing like this anyway so I give in and sit back down next
to him without making a fuss.
Phun turns around and breaks into a smile. Move closer, like how you were
before. I liked that. Real funny.
I give him an obvilous look. How exactly? I dont remember.
Ill get you next time. He mutters some complaints and I start laughing.
Then we sit quietly and watch the 7th graders play soccer together.
I decide to be the one asking him questions this time around. Hey. Youre
not bothered by the stuff from last night, are you? I ask because I feel like
there were a lot of misunderstandings. Phun simply gives me a smile. Which
stuff exactly?
Right, there were plenty. -_-
All of them
At this point, Phun lets out faint chuckle. If youre asking about when you
were yelling at me in the cab, Im not angry about that. Hahaha. Im sorry, I
was really pestering you. I shouldve realized that you were tired and wanted
to sleep. Oh, what the hell? Then why did he have to act like he was upset
this entire time? I kick his leg gently as his punishment but he dodges it.
You didnt mean those things you said, right? He asks while raising his
brows at me. I raise mine in return.
Yeah. The thing with Aim didnt bother me, honestly. Its within your right.
Because I know full well that I am not like that with Phun. Im just glad that
we can have the type of a relationship we got going now. However, he is
being real quiet.
Phun lets out a long sigh before he starts talking. I was really angryabout
Earn though. Eh? Hes bringing someone else up out of the blue? Im taken
aback by this. Did his band make it through too? What does that have to
do with anything?!
Yeah. Why are you angry about that? Dont tell me that its over something
really stupid. Theres nothing going on between me and him, you know. I
quickly clear up any misunderstandings (I had to deal with this stuff back in
the club room already) but Phun still has a serious look on his face.
NoIm angry at myself.
Huh? What is he on about?
I furrow my brows and look at his thoughtful face. Then Phun turns around
and our eyes meet. Impissed at the fact that I couldnt sing a song for
you. I shouldnt have been playing that guitar. Im also angry becauseI

couldnt stay and keep you company last night. Imsorry. His eyes look so
sincere and genuine that theres no way I can look away.
Hey, dont worry about that! I pat his shoulder twice. That didnt bug me
at all. You even bothered to come and picked me up, remember? His
intense stares still linger.
It wasnt something I bothered to do. It was something I wanted to do.Oh
now I dont know where to go from here.
Phun lets out another long sigh before he continues. Nohif Earn came and
told you that he likes youthen what would you say? What is he trying to
get at by asking me this? My answer is a palm landing squarely on his head,
for asking such a thing.
Im not gayso dont look down on me by assuming that I would just go and
be with any guy who happens to show interests in me
Im sorry. Phun mumbles like someone who is feeling guilty. He is looking
so glum and is now too afraid to look me in the eyes so he fails to notice that
I am smiling.
I stand up, with my back against him, and I blurt out what I want to say.
Theres the only one guy that I likeand thats you. So get that through
your thick skull. I run off the moment I finish and flee to the F Building
(which isnt too far from where the bleachers are, so we can still see each
other). I look back to see Phun standing there looking stunned, then he grins
widely and shouts something to me.
I like you too!
Goddamn it, why are you shouting?! Its so embarrassing!
I stick my middle finger at him and then I escape to the club room.

CHAPTER 35: WERE THE SAME

Friday arrives, it is the last day of the weekday so I am rushing to get my
homework done (by copying off Keng) with Om (who is copying off Palm).
Were so focused that were hardly paying attention to whats going on
around us. We have so many assignments to catch up on so we got to the
school at 7 am (I called and woke up Keng too) in order to finish this English
homework that we have. This summary assignment is terribly difficult and I
havent exactly been focusing on my studies in the past week. I scoff at my
own situation since I did this to myself.
Shit, Palm. I think you wrote this sentence wrong. Can you show me what
Keng wrote? Om complains as he flips the pages back and forth. Then he
looks through Kengs notebook, which is next to me, for a moment before my
phone rings.
Hail to our host! Wishing you lots of silvers. Wishing you lots of golds. Hail
to our host!
Changing up the ringtone is a hobby of mine (because I have so much free
time). Om glances at me while his hand is still copying the homework.
Way to make your iPhone lame by using that ringtone Fuck off, I like it.
I shrug at him, not paying any attention to his mockery. I check to see who is
calling me. Oh, I better mute this.
Your moms calling, I bet. My friend knows my situation too well. I dont
need to give him an answer since he already knows.
You better answer that right now or Ill be forced to deal with your shit. Om
yells at me, but my phone has already gone silent. A breath later, a different
ringtone can be heard.
Quit braggingggg, quit braggingggg, quit braggingggg.
You called me out on my ringtone, but that one is making it seem like yourLG
Secret is dirt cheap too!
Om glares at me when his phone starts to ring. He shoves it at me without
checking to see who is calling. You take it. Its your mom. Im not your
secretary.
Oh, come on. Ill just mute it then. I say as I look for the button to ignore
the call (how do you use this thing?) but then Om gives me a stern look.
Just answer the phone. Its your girlfriend. And I got a rule where if a chick
calls then it has to be answered. So no, you are not breaking my rule. You
son of a gun, are you seriously using your stupid ass rule to force me to take
that call?! I put on a sour expression as I stare at the LG screen which says
Nohs Mom on it. Well, arent you clever?
Fine, Ill answer.
Yes, Yuri? I decide to take her call even though I really need to finish up
with my assignments before school starts. I listen to Yuris perky and bubbly
tone of voice and I cant help but wonder if theres anything that could ever
make her feel stressed.
Are you free this evening? I knew it. I let out a silent chuckle.

This evening? I dont have any plans. I pretty much make the assumption
that Om will stay and take care of the club. I nearly lose my balance when
Om smacks me in the head.
Yuri continues to speak. Lets go somewhere together. I wanna look for Tosans birthday present. Can you help me choose? Well, theres the reason I
should go with her. (Yuri calls her father To-san since he is Japanese.) I know
that if I let her pick a present all by herself, theres a very high chance that
To-san will end up getting a Hello Kitty paperweight for his birthday.
Sure, where should we go?
Lets meet up at Siam after school, Noh. Ill just walk around there and wait
for you. She tells me before she hangs up. I return the phone to Om and he
whistles at me as a tease.
Well, arent you popular? What the hell is he on about? Im starting to
wonder how much he actually knows.
***
I quickly make my way to meet up with Yuri at Siam after school has ended.
Once I get out of the cab, I pull out my phone so I can call her but then I
notice a light-skinned girl picking out some baked goods in Au Bon Pain.
Lets surprise her, heh heh.
I come up with mean prank where I sneak into the shop and scare her so she
would scream loudly. As I slowly make my way closer to her
Yuri turns around and yells at me BOOOOO!
AHHHHH! This didnt go according to plan since I am the one letting out a
loud scream. Its so embarrassing. The staff and other patrons in the cafe are
trying very hard to hold in their laughter.
You started me, Yuri! I cry out as I pat my chest to calm myself down. She
laughs and points at my face instead. So humiliating!
Hahaha, if you think you can get me then you thought wrong. Hahaha! So
are you in the mood to eat something? Im about to pay. As if Id be willing
to stay! Hurry up and pay so we can leave. Im about to dig a hole and hide
in it!
Yuri sees me shaking my head, looking forlorn and she lets out some more
bubbly giggles before she turns back to pay. We leave the cafe together, with
one of her arm clinging to mine while carrying the bag. So where should we
go? Help me think.
Sure, do you have any rough ideas on what to get To-san?
Something that he can use at work. What do you think about office
supplies? The image of a Hello Kitty paperweight pops into my head right
away.
What kind of gifts do men prefer, Noh?
Definitely not a Hello Kitty paperweight. I quickly let her know. At this
point, Yuri lets go of my arm and stares at me, looking stunned.
Howd you know?! I was just thinking about that! See? I knew it. I was right
to come here with her.

Heh heh heh. I chuckle as Yuri hits my arm.

Noh, tell me how you knew! Can you read my mind?!
Heh heh heh.
Noh, how did you know?!
Heh heh heh.
NOH! Well, I just think Yuri is very ready to read, heh heh heh.
After we decided not to buy a Hello Kitty Paperweight, Yuri took me all
around Siam during which my legs nearly gave out. We seem to be diverting
from the goal though since she is now choosing a skirt. I doubt that To-san
wears skirts.
Noh, do you think this one is cute? She asks me as she drapes a skirt on
herself.
Yeah, pretty cute. But I dont really know because I think they all look the
same to me.
Is it too short? She continues.
Somewhat. At this point, Yuri puffs up her cheeks. She looks at me with an
upset expression.
She begins using her tiny voice. It sounds like shes a little peeved by my
answer. Should I really wear something like this? Arent you a bit
concerned? What is she up to this time around? I let out a soft chuckle.
You can wear whatever you want, Yuri. Who am I to stop you?
You really arent concerned. She mutters to herself while slouching. She
looks really adorable like this so I continue to speak.
You can wear that, but then you cant get home late. Its dangerous, got it?
Yuris eye go wide once I finished talking.
So youre worried?! Eh? Of course. A woman wearing a short skirt while
going home by herself late at night? Im a guy. I know what the risks are.
But I have no idea what Yuri is thinking. She gives me a big grin before she
puts the skirt back on the rack and then she holds my arm (very) tightly.
Noh, youre the best! I stand still because I dont know whats going on.
I see. Basically, you just wanted to know if Id get worried about you? Heh,
how weird.
Once we left that store with the skirts, we walked by Siam Square and
crossed over to Siam Center before we arrived at Siam Discovery because
Yuri mentioned that she wanted to check out some things at Loft. I wasnt
sure if she was looking for her own stuff or a present for To-san. At any rate,
she got a new cloth bag, a pencil container, a mouse pad and a wrist
rest. Sowheres the present for To-san?
As she is paying for all her stuff, she turns to look at me sheepishly. There
are only my stuff. What do I do now? I cant help but laugh out loud.
I warned you not to come here. Yuri gives me a dispirited nod then she
accepts a bright yellow bag from the cashier.
Where to then? She complains to herself while I put the yellow bag into a
tote bag that I offered to carry for Yuri, along with her school bag. Her light
face has a very focused expression on it and then she smiles wide.

Lets go to Central. I dont think the stuff there would steal my attention
much. That makes sense. I knew that coming Siam wouldnt have been a
good idea in the first place. I check my watch. It tells me that it is a little past
5 pm. Its getting late, but theres still time. I give her a nod and we take the
skytrain to Central Chidlom.
It seems like this is a better choice because there are only mature stuff at
this place. A teen girl like Yuri is a little disappointed but it cant be helped. If
she wants to find something for To-san, then this is the place to do so. I smile
at Yuri who seems to be taking this pretty seriously as she decides on
whether to get a tie clip or a watch for her Japanese father.
Noh, do you think this one is nice? She shows me a well-made tie clip.
Pretty nice.
How about this watch? She picks up the watch to compare.
At this point, I start to feel uncertain. Its hard to choose. I honestly dont
know what to tell her. While the watch is more expensive, its a very great
looking watch.
Yuri exhales loudly. Which one do you prefer if this were your birthday
present? She looks up and asks for my opinion as if she wants to plead with
me. I smile at her.
If this were Noh. Then Noh would want a watch. But since were talking
about your father, this Noh doesnt really know either.
Then Ill buy the tie clip for To-san and Ill buy this watch for
you.What?! She instantly decides things for herself. Naturally, I cant allow
this to happen.
I immediately stop her. Dont do that, Yuri. I dont want it. Its too
expensive. Yuri puts on a sour expression. But I wanna buy something for
you too.
I change my stance from scolding her to appeasing her. Please dont. Were
here to buy a present for To-san, remember? Yuri gives in. She nods at me
then she hands over the tie clip to the employee to pay for it. Soon enough,
we see a tie clip inside a beautiful box.
Yuri beams like a little kid. Im hungry, lets go find something to eat. She
tells me as she accepts the wrapped present from the employee and then
she shows off the fancy present to me. Yeah, Im getting hungry myself. My
stomach is making noises in protest.
As usual, we end up at MOS Burger located in the underground level. Yuri is
addicted to this place. I wonder if they put drugs in their food or something
because every time she and I come to Siam, she would ask me to go over to
Paragon so that we can eat here. Before they opened a chain in Paragon, Yuri
used to dragged me all the way to Central World just so we can eat at MOS
Burger. I hear that To-san likes them too. Actually, I like them too. They give
you a lot of meat and the bread is sweet. The downside is that theyre a bit
too big. Yuri makes a mess every time she eats one.

Look, you got it all over you, heh heh. I tell her while I hand the person
sitting across from me some tissues. Yuri makes an oblivious face at first,
then she accepts them but she cant get all the mess on her face.
So, I decide to help her. A little to the right. Go up a bit. No, no. Down. To the
right, a little more. Sigh. Here, Ill do it. I was getting exhausted so I figure
that I should just do this myself. I grab another tissue and wipe gently (I
think?).
Ow, do it gently. Noh, this is my face, not a scratch-off lottery. Oh? I guess
Im using too much force. Now Im trying to be even gentler. But wait
That guy over there thats staring at me looks awfully familiar.
Phun I softly let his name slip from me, then I pull my hand back from
what I was doing. Yuri turns to look at what got my attention.
Oh, Phun! Come join us! Oh, god! Dont call out to him! But it is too late,
Yuri is waving wildly at Phun who is being way too obedient since he is
walking up to us now. He looks at me strangely and I simply could not stare
back at him for too long before I look away. Why am I shaking? I dont even
know. Im just afraid. Im afraid that Phun might be hurt by this. Yet, here I
am still arguing with myself about how he and I arent even together.
Phun walks over to me and gently squeezes my shoulder once. I dont know
what this means.
Meeting Aim here, Phun? Yuris chirpily asks about her friend. Phun seems
to be a little reluctant to answer.
Ohno. Im didnt make any plans with Aim. He sits down next to me, still
looking at my face.
Eh? What are you doing all the way here then? Yuri continues with the
question while Im staying very quiet. I still occasionally glance at Phun. Its
weird that his expression seems to be lively like usual.
Im here to meet my little sister, we made plans together.
Ah, nong Pang? I ask him. He nods with a smile. Oh, shit. I forgot that nong
Pangs school is right across Central Chidlom.
When? And where? I continue to ask him weakly as I think ahead of what to
do if nong Pang were to see us. Itll be bad, but Phun doesnt seem to be
concerned at all.
Six oclock, at the school gateoh, thank you. A staff hands Phun his to-go
order that Phun had made earlier in the middle of his sentence. I stare at the
big plastic bag and assume that Phun probably ordered extra food for nong
Pang as well.
He checks the items in his bag before he looks up with a smile. I should go
meet up with her. See you around. He directs the latter sentence at me as
he gets up and waves goodbye. Yuri waves in return, but then she puts on a
bothered expression once Phun is gone.
Hes lying I am taken aback by what Yuri is saying out of the blue.
Eh? Why are you saying that?
She scowls, then she takes a sip from her punch as she speaks. Because
Phun told Aim that he cant go see a movie with her today since he has an
important errand to run. But hes actually hitting on girls in Chidlom instead.

I promptly give an excuse on his behalf. Hold on, his sister really does
attend school near here. But it seems like Yuri refuses to hear me out.
Her bright face still has a frown on it. Hes been acting like this a lot as of
lateever since the incident. I know very well which incident shes referring
to. I also think I know whats going on with Phun. I was about to feel guilty,
but then what happened with Aim in Hua Hin pops into my head. I feel sorry
for Aim. She shouldnt have let him get away with it. Yuri continues.
However, I keep eating the burger in my hands despite wanting to let out a
laughter.
Sometimes, you cant place the blame all on the guy, Yuri.
At this point, the girl with a light face is giving me a stare as if she wants to
argue. I shake my head at her because I dont want to talk about this any
longer.
We all love our friends.
So I suppose that Yuri loves her friend.
Well, I love Phun too.