Professional Documents
Culture Documents
heart...
1. Be yourself
If I make a comment to someone - even though it was kindly and sincerely meant - and
they get upset or take offense, is their upset my responsibility?
The answer is no.
You can genuinely love someone whilst nevertheless doing something they don't like
or agree with.
You do it because you feel it is the right thing to do, though you still understand and
have empathy for their different viewpoint (which causes their emotional reaction)
which they have created by their own choices and belief system.
If one only did things others can easily accept then the status quo would never
progress.
That would truly be a trap.
The solution here is better communication, leading to increased understanding of each
other's viewpoint, and therefore acceptance of the differing personal realities.
There is a strong imprint in our culture to feel sad, guilty, etc. for painful emotions our
actions may cause to others.
There's a general misconception that you are your emotions.
"I am angry" and "you make me angry".
This is conditioning not truth.
In terms of cause and effect, it's a viewpoint at effect.
Some say that to be happy, only do what others can easily experience - it's the same
lie.
And if it isn't then you'd better re-think whether you are indeed doing the right thing.
It is one definition of a 'wrong' action: that which you would not like another to do to
you.
You are responsible for your choices, decisions and actions.
For being true to your judgment.
For communicating with honesty and integrity, developing and maintaining an open
mind, and promoting understanding and empathy.
For never compromising your freedoms and rights nor trampling on another's.
For always acting from the primary motivation of love.
That's all and quite enough.
Others are responsible, in the same way, for their own beliefs, interpretations, feelings,
responses, and reactions; that's their right and their life - none of our business.
Making something come to life that you have envisioned - whether a painting, a
wonderful meal, a dress, an invention, a business plan - is infinitely satisfying.
And you'll feel pleasure every time you think of it.
If you want to be happy, get active - at work, within the family and the community.
You will feel happier when you're participating in an activity, whether it's just playing
with a child or helping organize a worthwhile event.
Self-esteem comes from demonstrated competence.
Everyone has skills but not everyone uses them.
So use your skills - find out what you're good at and do it.
Joy is often about living in the moment, being absorbed in what you're doing, not
brooding on the past or guessing your future.
Decide what YOU really want and then go for it.
It can take courage but it's worth the risk.
14. Be Mindful
We need to be very much in touch with our heart, with our feelings, but still to remain
intelligent about it - to remain in control, not driven by our emotions.
We need a balance of left and right brain - rational mind and emotional mind, logic and
feelings, intellect and intuition.
This is where mindfulness and wisdom is found.
We tend to be too cut off from our feelings, in order to suppress painful ones - and this
becomes a habit.
Academic education reinforces this imbalance.
And then we lose a lot of our creative and intuitional ability.
At the same time, however, when those emotions 'escape' we tend to be driven by
them, and think and act impulsively.