761114085716001

FAKULTI PENDIDIKAN DAN BAHASA

SEMESTER MEI / TAHUN 2014

OUMH1303

ENGLISH FOR ORAL COMMUNICATION

NO. MATRIKULASI

761114085716001
NO. KAD PENGENALAN :
NO. TELEFON

761114-08-5716

012-3608660

E-MEL
:norhayatiazhar@rocketmail.com
PUSAT PEMBELAJARAN :
1

SHAH ALAM

761114085716001

WHAT DOES IT TAKE TO BE A GOOD PARENT?

Good morning to my dear teachers, parents and pupils. Firstly, thanks to
all the parents for your attendance today. Support of all parents is we
need to ensure the success of each program organized by the school, in
order to achieve excellence in students. Today, i would like to share with
you of the very important thing is how to be a good parent.
Ladies and gentlemen,
Being a parent can be one of the most rewarding and fulfilling experiences
of your life, but that doesn't mean it's easy. No matter what age your child
or children are, your work is never done. To be a good parent, you need to
know how to make your children feel valued and loved, while teaching
them the difference between right and wrong. At the end of the day, the
most important thing is to create a nurturing environment where your
children feel like they can thrive and develop into confident, independent,
and caring adults. If you want to know how to be a good parent, you must
know what are the characteristics of a good parents.
Ladies and gentlemen,
Who is parent? Parent is a father or mother; one who begets or one who
gives birth to or nurtures and raises a child; a relative who plays the role
of guardian. Parenting is, in fact the interpersonal relationship between
parents and children. The depth, intensity or the methods or relationship
is highly personal and what works between few parents and children may
not be the same for certain parents and children.
There are multiple characteristics of a good parent. First, parent must
express love and affection to their children. This is the most important
characteristic of to be a good parent. Many parents say that they love
their kids more than any parent does, yet their kids complain of less
affectionate and less loved parents. Love and affection, when not
2

761114085716001

expressed is worthless. Parents need to make their kids feel that they love
the children. Here are some ways to show love and affection :
1. A gentle cuddle, a little encouragement, appreciation, approval or
even a smile can go a long way to boost the confidence and wellbeing of your children.
2. Tell them you love them every day, no matter how angry at them
you may be.
3. Give lots of hugs and some kisses. Make your children comfortable
with love and affection from birth.
4. Love them unconditionally; don't force them to be who you think
they should be in order to earn your love. Let them know that you
will always love them no matter what.
It can boost the confidence of kids and feel them that parents love them
and stand for them.
Ladies and gentlemen,
The second characteristic of good parent is praise your children.
Praising your children is an important part of being a good parent. You
want your kids to feel proud of their accomplishments and good about
themselves. If you don't give them the confidence they need to be out in
the world on their own, then they won't feel empowered to be
independent or adventurous. When they do something good, let them
know that you've noticed and that you're very proud of them. Make a
habit of praising your children at least three times as much as you give
them negative feedback. Though it's important to tell your children when
they're doing something wrong, it's also important to help them build a
positive sense of self. If they are too young to fully understand, praise
them with treats, applause, and lots of love. Encouraging them for doing
everything from using the potty to getting good grades can help them
lead a happy and successful life.
The third characteristic of a good parent is listen to your children. It's
important that your communication with your children goes both ways.
3

761114085716001

You shouldn't just be there to enforce rules, but to listen to your children
when they are having a problem. You have to be able to express interest
in your children and involve yourself in their life. You should create an
atmosphere in which your children can come to you with a problem,
however large or small. You can even set aside a time to talk to your
children every day. This can be before bedtime, at breakfast, or during a
walk after school. Treat this time as sacred and avoid checking your phone
or getting distracted. If your child says he has to tell you something, make
sure you take this seriously and drop everything you're doing, or set up a
time to talk when you can really listen. Let them express all their feelings
to you and through this, you can understand what they really want and
how they feel about you.
The fourth characteristic is avoid comparing your children to others,
especially siblings. Each child is individual and unique. Celebrate their
differences and instil in each child the desire to pursue their interests and
dreams. Failure to do so may give your child an inferiority complex, an
idea that they can never be good enough in your eyes. If you want to help
them improve their behaviour, talk about meeting their goals on their own
terms, instead of telling them to act like their sister or neighbour. This will
help them develop a sense of self instead of having an inferiority complex.
Comparing one child to another can also make one child develop a rivalry
with his or her sibling. You want to nurture a loving relationship between
your children, not a competitive one. You must avoid favouritism. Surveys
have shown that most parents have favourites, but most children believe
that they are the favourite. If your children are quarrelling, don't choose
sides, but be fair and neutral.
Ladies and gentlemen,
The next characteristics is enforce reasonable rules. You should enforce
rules that apply to every person leading a happy and productive life, not
model rules of your ideal person. It's important to set rules and guidelines
that help your child develop and grow without being so strict that your
4

761114085716001

child feels like he can't take a step without doing something wrong.
Ideally, your child should love you more than he fears your rules. The key
to effective discipline is to have clear rules and boundaries in place for
your child and to be consistent about enacting consequences. To enforce
reasonable rules, you should follow these ways;
1. Communicate your rules clearly. Children should be very familiar
with the consequences of their actions. If you give them a
punishment, be sure they understand the reason and the fault; if
you cannot articulate the reason and how they are at fault the
punishment will not have the discouraging effects you desire.
2. Make sure that you not only set reasonable rules, but that you
enforce them reasonably. Avoid overly harsh forms of punishment,
ridiculously stringent punishments for minor infractions, or anything
that involves physically hurting your child.

The sixth characteristic is control your temper as much as you

can. It's important to try to be as calm and reasonable as you can when
you explain your rules or carry them out. You want your children to take
you seriously, not fear you or think of you as unstable. Obviously, this can
be quite a challenge, especially when your children are acting out or just
driving you up the wall, but if you feel yourself getting ready to raise your
voice, take a break and excuse yourself before you finish talking to your
children. Sometimes, we all lose our tempers and feel out of control. If you
do or say something you regret, you should apologize to your children,
letting them know that you've made a mistake. If you act like the
behaviour is normal, then they will try to mimic it.

The seventh characteristic is criticize your child's behaviour, not your

child. It's important to criticize your children's actions, instead of your
actual child. You want your child to learn that he or she can accomplish
whatever he or she wants through his or her behaviour, instead of being
stuck being one kind of person. Let him or her feel like he has the agency
5

761114085716001

to improve his behaviour. When your child acts out in a harmful and
spiteful manner, tell him or her that such behaviour is unacceptable and
suggest alternatives. Avoid statements such as: "You're bad." Instead, say
something like, "It was very wrong to be mean to your little sister." Explain
why the behaviour was bad. Be assertive yet kind when pointing out what
they have done wrong. Be stern and serious, but not cross or mean, when
you tell them what you expect. Avoid public humiliation. If they misbehave
in public, take them aside, and scold them privately.
Ladies and gentlemen,
The eighth characteristic to be a good parent is teach your children to
be independent. Teach your children that it is okay for them to be
different, and they do not have to follow the crowd. Teach them right from
wrong when they are young, and they will (more often than not) be able to
make their own decisions, instead of listening to or following others.
Remember that your child is not an extension of yourself. Your child is an
individual under your care, not a chance for you to relive your life through
them. Here are some aspect that you need to take attention to teach your
children to be independent;
1. When your children get old enough to make decisions for
themselves, you should encourage them to choose which extracurricular activities they want to do or what friends they want to
play with. Unless you think an activity is very dangerous, or a
playmate is a very bad influence, you should let your children figure
things out for themselves.
2. A child may have an opposite disposition, introverted when you are
extroverted, for instance, and will not be able to fit into the pattern
and style that you choose, and will make his or her own decisions
instead.
3. They need to learn that their own actions have consequences (good
and bad). By doing so, it helps them to become good decision
makers and problem solvers so that they are prepared for
independence and adulthood.
6

761114085716001

4. Don't routinely do things for your children that they can learn to do
for themselves. While getting them a glass of water before bed is a
nice way to make them get to sleep faster, don't do it so often that
they come to expect it.
The next characteristic is be a good role model. If you want your child
to be well-behaved, then you should model the behaviour and character
you hope your children will adopt and continue to live by the rules that
you set. Show them by example in addition to verbal explanations.
Children have a tendency to become what they see and hear unless they
make a conscious and concerted effort to break the mould. You don't have
to be a perfect person, but you should strive to do as you want your
children to do, so you don't look hypocritical if you tell your children to be
polite to others when they find you getting in a heated argument in the
supermarket. These are some ways to be a good role model;
1. It's perfectly okay to make mistakes, but you should apologize or let
your child know that the behaviour is not good. You can say
something like, "Mommy didn't mean to yell at you. She was just
very upset." This is better than ignoring that you made a mistake,
because that will show the child that he or she should model this
behaviour.
2. Want to teach kids about charity? Get involved and take your kids
with you to a soup kitchen or homeless shelter and help serve up
meals. Explain to them why you do acts of charity so they
understand why they should.
3. Teach kids about chores by setting a schedule and having them help
you out. Don't tell your child to do something, but ask for their help.
The earlier they learn to help you, the longer they will be willing to.
4. If you want your son or daughter to learn to share, set a good
example and share your things with them.
The last characteristic to be a good parent is encourage your children
to have a healthy lifestyle. It's important to make sure that your
children eat healthy food as much as they can, that they get plenty of
7

761114085716001

exercise, and that they get enough rest every night. You should encourage
positive and healthy behaviour without harping on it too much or making
it seem like you're forcing your children to eat or act a certain way. Let
them come to these conclusions on their own while helping them see the
meaning and importance of a healthy life. How to encourage them?
1. One way to encourage them to exercise is to get them to play a
sport early on in life, so they find a passion that is also healthy.
2. If you start over-explaining to the child that something is unhealthy
or that they shouldn't get it, they may take it the wrong way and
feel like you are insulting them. Once this happens, they will no
longer want to go out to eat with you, and they will feel bad eating
around you, which could make them want to sneak and hide junk
food from you.
3. When trying to enforce healthy eating habits, start it at a younger
age. Giving rewards of candy to children may create a bad habit,
because once they get older, some may feel they should reward
themselves which can lead to obesity. While they are young, start
them out with healthier snacks. Instead of chips, try goldfish
(crackers), grapes, and many more.
4. The eating habits they learn as they are younger are the ones they
continue to have. Also, never make your child finish their plate, if
they say they are not hungry. This can continue throughout their
lives, causing them to finish no matter what portions are on their
plate.
Ladies and gentlemen,
Every parent wishes to be the best parent in the world. But, when the life
turns into reality, most of the parent fail to remain best parent or at least
good parents. This may occur because the parents do not have the
knowledge to be a good parent. Therefore parents should seek knowledge
so that they can be good parents. Good parents are to be consistent in
their parenting styles. If you ask kids to follow certain rules, then apply
the same rules always. Do not be flexible according to your comfort. Rules
are to be rules what may happen. This approach will infuse into kids the
8

761114085716001

feeling of importance of obeying parents always. Be good to yourself that

is the way of being good parents. I hope all of parents will be a good
parent soon.
Thank you.
(2527 words)
REFERENCES
http://www.ehow.com/how_4872_be-parent.html
myyoungchild.org/parents/good-parent/
www.wikihow.com/Be-a-Good-Parent
www.prokerala.com/...ting/how-to-be-a-good-parent.php
www.psychologytoday.com/blog/compassion-matters/201011/how-be-good
www.webmd.com/parenting/features/10-commandments-good