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RAYMOND CARVER AND ALCOHOLICS


ANONYMOUS: THE NARRATIVE UNDER THE
SURFACE OF THINGS
CHAD WRIGLESWORTH
Regent College

hen Raymond Carver met Richard Ford in 1978, Carver had


already crossed over into what he spoke of as the second of two
lives. June 2, 1977 marked Carvers line of demarcation, the day he
entered into a new life without alcohol (Gentry and Stull 89). In these
days of instability, Ford remembers that Carver had inched his way
out of shadows and into light, and he was as thankful, and as determined to stay in the lightmy light, your light, the worlds lightas
any convert to a feasible religion (73). Fords memory suggests that
Carver was a convert, a changed man on a pilgrimage to recovery.
However, while critics may recognize that something happened to
Raymond Carvers ction, few are willing to associate Carvers literary
transformation with a spiritual conversion. This interpretive reluctance
causes Carvers vision of transcendence to be handled with suspicion,
as spiritual imagery and confessional language is typically dismissed as
an alcoholics restored hope in humanity rather than a possible encounter
with the other.1 In contrast to the postmodern way of suspicion, Dennis
Taylor advocates for an authentic engagement with spirituality in literature. Taylor goes as far as suggesting that some texts in the western
canon actually demand a religious interpretation; when this possibility
is squelched, what is left over is a nagging spiritual question (125).
Concurring with Taylor, I suggest that a truly judicious approach to
Raymond Carvers life and work will create the necessary theoretical
space for a spiritual reading.
Perhaps the most signicant article concerning Carvers spirituality is
William Stulls, Beyond Hopelessville: Another Side of Raymond Carver.
In this essay Stull contrasts the darkness of Carvers earlier work with
the optimism illustrated in Cathedral. Stulls close reading of The Bath
and A Small, Good Thing suggests that the ominous uncertainty of
The Bath is revised from chaos into an understated allegory of spiritual rebirth (12) which culminates as a symbol of the Resurrection
(13). Although Stull cites deliberate allusions between the Bible and
Carvers story, Carver makes no claims of biblical literacy, making it
problematic to suggest he was using Christian imagery as deliberately
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as Stull suggests.2 For this reason, both Randolph Paul Runyon and
Mark A. R. Facknitz reject Stulls interpretation. They, in turn, assert
that the ending of A Small, Good Thing is not designed to elicit a
sense of Christian communion, but is a self generated human communion that is genuine, but also godless (Runyon 149, Facnitz 29596).
Although these observations make a valid rebuttal, their overwhelming
rejection of structured Christianity also negates the spiritual awakening
that is certainly evident in Carvers post-recovery work. To dismiss the
possibility of a spiritual encounter on the grounds that it does not correlate with Christianity is yet another representative misreading of Carvers
work. In short, Carvers spirituality is far more ambiguous than critics
tend to realize, as Carver simultaneously refuses to be interpreted as a
Christian or a secular humanist.
As an alternative approach to this critical tension, Hamilton E.
Cochrane contends that Carvers predilection toward spirituality arises
from his association with Alcoholics Anonymous. Cochrane asserts that
examining Carvers redemption in light of the A.A. experience is illuminating and more accurate than locating his new sensibility in some
other, say, Christian perspective (81). Although Cochranes observations
are convincing and insightful, it is worth noting that Carver actually
denies the inuence of Alcoholics Anonymous on more than one occasion; however, this rejection should be interpreted with care.3 For even
if Carver did not reproduce the actual narratives of A.A. meetings in
his work, an examination of key stages in the A.A. program suggests
that the structural patterns of Alcoholics Anonymous inuenced the spiritual dimension in Carvers later work.
In 1977, Carver was living in San Francisco, where he visited St.
James Episcopal Church and went to at least one and sometimes two
[A.A.] meetings a day for the rst month (Gentry and Stull 39). During
Carvers early drying out period, he continued to attend A.A. meetings
for what he calls, the longest whilesix or eight months (Adelman,
Carver Country 106). Apart from these brief references to A.A., it is dicult
to assess the degree of participation Carver maintained with Alcoholics
Anonymous; nevertheless, it is evident that the inuence of A.A. remained
with Carver his entire life. For example, Tess Gallagher, Carvers wife,
recalls that by 1980 Carver was secure enough in his sobriety to develop
a pattern of attending A.A. meetings with friends who were struggling
with alcoholism (Soul Barnacles 219). However, in 1988 Carver found
himself on the brink of drinking again. In this moment of temptation,
Gallagher remembers that he started out for an AA meeting but
returned home, as he was unable to nd the exact location of the
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meeting (Soul Barnacles 209). That same year, at the conclusion of Carvers
funeral, the Lords Prayer was oered, as they do at the end of A.A.
meetings, in respect and gratitude for [Carvers] sobriety (Halpert 183).
Taking all of this into consideration, the objective of this article is to
oer an illustrative study that compares various stages of Alcoholics
Anonymous with the characteristics and patterns interpreted in Carvers
post-recovery writings. In doing so, it is evident that on a surface level,
Carvers rehabilitation brought sense and order to a chaotic personal
narrative. Yet, beneath a text of what Carver describes as the smooth
(but sometimes broken and unsettled) surface of things (Fires 26), Carvers
own life and work parallels the patterns of Alcoholics Anonymous, suggesting that this recovery program contributed signicantly to Carvers
spiritual and literary transformation.
Step Three: Cathedral and the Possibility of Something
Made a decision to turn our will and our lives over to
the care of God as we understood Him. (Twelve Steps and
Twelve Traditions 35)
Raymond Carvers spirituality is not systematic or easily denableit
is not bound by orthodox creed or specic doctrine. In a similar way,
Alcoholics Anonymous is described as a spiritual rather than a religious program (Wilcox 64). The only confessional requirement is that
the new member must be willing to recognize that alcoholism has bent
his or her mind into such an obsession for destructive drinking that
only an act of Providence can remove it (Wilcox 21). The second step
recognizes that this healing force of Providence is not antagonistic, but
desires wholeness and restorationwhich leads to the third, and perhaps, most critical step. Through an act of faith, the alcoholic must
cross a threshold, turning his or her life over to the gracious care of
the higher power as they understand Him, content to receive renewal
based on the limited revelation he or she has received. Reading a story
such as Cathedral in this context, suggests that the ambiguous higher
power of Alcoholics Anonymous surfaces in the form of an ineable
something that is mysteriously revealed to the narrator of Cathedral.4
When one probes below the surface of Cathedral, characteristics
of Carvers God as he understood Him become clearer. A blind man,
an old friend of the narrators wife, comes to visit, dismantling the narrators stereotypical assumptions concerning blindness. The narrator,
hemmed in by insecurity and prejudice, buered by drink and pot and
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by the sad fact, as his wife says, that he has no friends, [the narrator] is badly out of touch with his world, his wife, and himself (Nesset
66). However, the complacent and insular narrator actually becomes
dependent upon the blind man, a character whose paradoxical vision
reaches far deeper than the narrator thought he could ever imagine.
As the evening conversation fades, the two men are watching a late
program, something about the church and the Middle Ages (Cathedral
222). The blind man leans toward the screen with his ear cocked, hearing what he fails to see. Together, they listen to a droning Englishman
describe cathedrals and their symbolic ability to reach for transcendence.
The narrator suddenly becomes aware of a communication gap. In a
series of rapid questions, he asks the blind man: Do you have any idea
what a cathedral is? What they look like, that is? Do you follow me?
If somebody says cathedral to you, do you have any notion what theyre
talking about? Do you know the dierence between that and a Baptist
church, say? (223224). Although the blind man knows something of
cathedrals, he has no idea what one actually looks like. Yet, as the narrator stares at the various cathedrals, he realizes that words will not
capture the image. He gropes for language, but stops as he wasnt getting through to him (225). In frustration, the narrator simply states
that in those olden days, when they built cathedrals, men wanted to
be close to God. In those olden days, God was an important part of
everyones life. You could tell this from their cathedral-building (225).
While the narrators attempt at description is genuine, language fails to
penetrate what participation with the image communicates.
The blind man then responds with an explicit question that provokes
a confession:
Hey, listen. I hope you dont mind my asking you. Can
I ask you something? Let me ask you a simple question,
yes or no. Im just curious and theres no oense. Youre
my host. But let me ask if you are in any way religious?
You dont mind me asking?
I shook my head. He couldnt see that, though. A wink
is the same as a nod to a blind man. I guess I dont
believe in it. In anything. Sometimes its hard. You know
what Im saying?
Sure, I do, he said.
Right, I said. (225)

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Through these unpredictable shifts in conversational rhythm, it is probable that the looming and breaking of silence is not an indicator of
what is often generalized as Carveresque reticence, but the origins of
genuine conversation, an invitation prodded by the higher power
designed to negotiate a passage into spiritual awakening. As Martin
Buber suggests, authentic dialogue reects a pattern of broken silences,
perhaps dictated by a spiritual presence:
It is not necessary for all who are joined in a genuine
dialogue actually to speak; those who keep silent can on
occasion be especially important . . . No one, of course,
can know in advance what it is that he has to say; genuine dialogue cannot be arranged beforehand. It has indeed
its basic order in itself from the beginning, but nothing
can be determined, the course is of the spirit, and some
discover what they have to say only when they catch the
call of the spirit. (87)
Mirroring Bubers assertion, the silence encroaches upon the two men
again, until the narrator is moved to speak. Apologizing for his inability to communicate, it is, perhaps, the spirit of language that moves the
narrator to clarify his confession further: The truth is, cathedrals dont
mean anything special to me. Nothing. Cathedrals. Theyre something
to look at on late-night TV. Thats all they are. It was then that the
blind man cleared his throat (226).
In Carvers typical spare style that tells nothing, but shows everything, eavesdropping readers must interpret meaning through the limited lens of Carvers compressed language and deliberate actions of his
characters (Cochrane 79). The blind man cleared his throatWas it
just coincidental timing? Or was the blind man oended by the narrators indierence towards the other? Whatever the case, a throat
clearing shifts the control of the narrative, as, in this moment, the power
of knowledge shifts. The blind man begins directing the narrator to
gather up some heavy paper and a pen. After they clear a space to
draw, the blind man closes his hand over the narrators and politely
orders, Go ahead, bub, draw . . . Draw. Youll see. Ill follow along
with you. Itll be okay. Just begin now like Im telling you. Youll see.
Draw (227). These directions speak a prophetic irony. Twice the blind
man repeats, youll see, in the context of youll see how things work.
However, the expansive conclusion of the story reveals that the narrator, who does not believe in it or anything that inhabits cathedrals
(226), actually sees something (229).
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As instructed, the narrator draws. He begins timidly, blindly drawing a box that could have been the house [he] lived in (227); yet
after some encouragement, he remembers: I couldnt stop (227). Even
when the program goes o the air, the two men continue. In a rapid
series of sequential commands, the blind man oers instruction and
encouragement to his pupil: Put some people in there now. Whats a
cathedral without people? . . . Close your eyes now (227228). Without
questioning, the narrator continues to draw. And with eyes closed, he
recalls the unique moment that transported him to an encounter with
something:
So we kept on with it. His ngers rode my ngers as my
hand went over the paper. It was like nothing else in my
life up to now.
Then [the blind man said] I think thats it. I think
you got it, he said Take a look. What do you think?
But I had my eyes closed. I thought Id keep them that
way for a little longer. I thought it was something I ought
to do.
Well? he said. Are you looking?
My eyes were still closed. I was in my house. I knew
that. But I didnt feel like I was inside anything.
Its really something, I said. (229, emphases mine)
Through his participation in volitional blindness, the narrator is able to
see something beyond what his personal limitations formerly allowed.
In the presence of something, he remains prayerfully silent, with eyes
closed, as though it was something he ought to do. Although the nal
lines are formed by abstract, seemingly elusive language, the narrators
own memory eliminates the possibility of a mundane experience. As if
transported by the spires he has drawn, he specically remembers the
sensation of transcending his own boundaries, as he didnt feel like
[he] was in anything. He remains silent for he lacks the adequate language or ability to communicate. In such a moment, Paul Tillich postulates the possibility of an authentic encounter with the other,
recognizing that there are those who feel that they cannot nd the
words of prayer and remain silent towards God. This may be lack of
Spirit. It may also be that their silence is silent prayer, namely, the sighs
which are too deep for words. Then He who searches the hearts of
men, knows and hears (The New Being 138).
Traditionally, critics have attributed this concluding passage to an
interpersonal connectivity between the narrator and the blind man. An
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alternative reading proposes that Carvers repetition of something


is a signicant, yet ambiguous, expression that testies to a confrontation with the ineable higher power, a force that Carver could
not adequately dene. Paul Dohertys insightful commentary on the
rhetorical structure of the nal lines proves to be informative for such
a reading:
Its really something. Those words are the honest best
the [narrator] can make of his new experience. In its vague
generality, the sentence simultaneously conveys both the
inadequacy of language to describe the experience which
the [narrator] is having, and the validity of that experience. It, the experience of moving beyond language, is
real it is some thing. (340)
Dohertys observations unearth the potential meaning beneath the surface of Carvers text, as this phrase may function as an internal allusion to an earlier moment in the story. Previously, when questioned
about his religious convictions, the narrator replied that he didnt believe
in it. In anything (225). In contrast to this nothingness, after seeing the
makeshift cathedral through volitional blindness, the narrator recants,
testifying that It is really something (229 emphasis mine). What was formerly nothing, is now perceived as some thing plausible.
It is also worth noting that although the narrator fails to physically
see anything, his revelation comes through something analogous to an
engagement with an icon. Like a medieval icon inviting reection, the
narrators boxed house cathedral is rough cut, perhaps even ugly,
suggesting that the physical form may actually function as a vehicle
used to invite the spiritual experience. In his essay The Blind Man
of Siloe, Jean-Luc Marion distinguishes between polished images that
invite a religious voyeurism, and icons, which actually pull the viewer
into the symbol via their banality or even ugliness. A highly stylized
image, therefore, has the potential to lead to one-sided spiritual blindness, while an icon creates mutual sight, allowing the viewer to see
and be seen by the transcendent. Although the narrators cathedral
lacks aesthetic merit, its blunt features may be capable of pulling the
creator-observer to a point where he can see and be seen by the
signicant something.
This aspect of Cathedral is particularly curious, as external testimony suggests that the text itself bears qualities to an icon, generating
moments of spiritual transference for readers. For example, Tobias Wol
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remembers reading the story for the rst time. At the illuminating conclusion, he recalls metaphorically entering the text, seemingly levitating beyond the connes of his own boundaries (Halpert 153). In a
similar way, Tess Gallagher remembers that after working through several revisions of the story with Ray, the last lines of the nal version
just took the whole top o of the whole story. I could feel it physically, as if the roof lifted o the imaginary house (Stull and Carroll,
Two Darings 9). Largely because of this expansive eect, Edward
Duy ventures to call Cathedral a story of unambiguous salvation . . . As if by attending to [the text], a reader with ears to hear and
eyes to see could be lifted up towards the heavens (331).
Critics may continue to restrict Carvers stretch towards transcendence by conning Cathedral to a testament of human hope. However,
Carvers second life rejects such interpretations, as he bears witness
(Gentry and Stull 226) to a miraculous encounter with something that
changed his own voice, making it, as he liked to say, more generous.
While Carver did acknowledge a renewed sense of self-esteem through
his recovery from alcoholism, he also suspected the inuence of something else that he was unable to name. When asked about his more
generous writing, Carver could only state that Im more sure of my
voice, more sure of something . . . I dont have that sense of fooling around,
of being tentative . . . When I go to my desk now and pick up a pen,
I really know what I have to do. Its a totally dierent feeling (Gentry
and Stull 103).
While Carver may not couch his spirituality in an orthodox system
of faith, it is not overstatement to suggest that this unnamed something in Carvers life and work illustrates a spiritual reality. Despite
Carvers denial of religious aliation, he is also forced to qualify his
rejection in the same sentence. When asked about his faith, Carver
states that although he is not religious he must believe in miracles and
the possibility of resurrection (Gentry and Stull 46). This statement of
contradiction becomes plausible when contextualized within the Alcoholics
Anonymous program. For example, The Big Book of Alcoholics
Anonymous testies of a reality reminiscent of Carvers own miraculous
resurrection, proclaiming that the age of miracles is still with us. Our
own recovery proves that! (153).
While Carver was not an explicitly religious writer, his personal narrative recognizes the unnamable higher power that entered his life
through grace. As Carvers personal narrative references the higher
power, his later ction functions as a testament to the gracious presence that saved him. In opposition to such an interpretation, Facknitz
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recognizes grace in Carvers ction, yet attributes it to nothing beyond


the restoration of human compassion. Facknitz states:
Grace, Carver says, is bestowed upon us by other mortals, and it comes suddenly, arising in circumstances as
mundane as a visit to the barber shop . . . [It is] Not Grace
in the Christian sense at all, it is what grace becomes in
a godless worlda deep and creative connection between
humans that reveals to Carvers alienated and diminished
creatures that there can be contact in a world they supposed was empty of sense or love . . . in the cathedrals we
draw together, we create large spaces for the spirit. (29596)
Considering Carvers acknowledgement of the higher power, Facknitzs
strictly humanist interpretation illustrates what now stands as a normative misreading of Carvers work. While Facknitz correctly asserts that
grace in Carvers work is not traditionally Christian, his interpretation fails to consider the possibility of the other, or what both Carver
and his narrator call something. Despite Facknitzs polished speculation, it seems plausible that even in the midst of a godless world,
Carver had given himself over to the higher power, a force that
desired his restoration and recovery. As Carvers wife, Tess Gallagher,
arms: Raymond never heaped credit upon himself for having overcome his illness. He knew it was a matter of grace, of having put his
trust in what A.A. identies as a higher power, and of having miraculously been given the will to turn all temptation to drink aside (Soul
Barnacles 208209). Healing was oered to Carver as a gift. In response
to this encounter, it seems logical that Carvers later ction should communicate the same possibility of hope to others.
Step Nine: Redeeming the Past Through Re-Vision
Made direct amends to [people we have hurt] wherever possible, except when to do so would injure them or
others. (Twelve Steps and Twelve Traditions 85)
In a 1983 review of Cathedral, Anatole Boyard perceptively recognizes
that like a missionary, Mr. Carver seems to be gradually reclaiming
or redeeming his characters (27). It is evident that after Carvers initial rehabilitation from alcoholism, he felt an increasing burden to revisit
the past, holding himself responsible to reconcile division and broken
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relationships. As Tess Gallagher remembers, he carried some burdens


of guilt about what had happened, and he worked out his redemption and consequently some of ours in his art (Soul Barnacles 59). Through
his almost obsessive gift for textual revision, Carver was able to revisit
his characters, oering hope for recovery to those formerly left stranded
in the text.
The redemptive quality of Carvers ction is particularly evident when
comparing The Bath to A Small, Good Thing. Although The
Bath was published two years before A Small, Good Thing, Tess
Gallagher asserts that A Small, Good Thing was actually written rst,
but was severely cut and published as The Bath under the direction
of Gordon Lish, Carvers editor at the time. Carver had been sober for
about two years when he wrote the stories for What We Talk about When
We Talk About Love, and Gallagher states that during this time of initial
sobriety, Rays alcoholism had made him malleable and too accepting
of Lishs editing. Although Carver was unhappy with Lishs editorial
decisions for the stories, Gallagher explains that Carver allowed the
book to be published and that he eventually revised backwards, as his
condence as a writer increased through sobriety. Gallagher states:
[Ray] decided not to put his sobriety in jeopardy by going
to battle to keep [What We Talk about When We Talk about
Love] from being published in the Lish edited version.
When Lish wouldnt agree not to publish the book, Ray
didnt stop him. He just revised the stories backwards for
his nal collection [Where Im Calling From]. (Gallagher,
Conversation 96)
It is worth noting that when asked to compare A Small, Good Thing
and The Bath, Carver suggests that the two stories were not related,
but entirely separate narratives that came from dierent sources. Although
Carver does not mention Lishs inuence explicitly in this 1984 interview, he does indicate that after The Bath there was unnished business to manage because the story was not told correctly the rst time.
Comparing the two stories, Carver states:
In my own mind I consider them to be really two entirely
dierent stories, not just dierent versions of the same
story; its hard to even look on them as coming from the
same source. I went back to that one, as well as several
others, because I felt there was unnished business that
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needed attending to. The story hadnt been told originally;


it had been messed around with, condensed and compressed in The Bath to highlight the qualities of menace that I wanted to emphasize . . . so in the midst of
writing these other stories for Cathedral I went back to
The Bath and tried to see what aspects of it needed to
be enhanced, redrawn, reimagined. (Gentry and Stull 102)
Although it is no secret that Carver liked to, as he states, mess around
with [his] stories, the act of revising was far more than shifting commas. Instead, Carver used the revision process to gradually get into
the heart of what the story is about, implying that texts intrinsically
bear an organic meaning to be revealed (No Heroics, Please 108109). In
this case of A Small, Good Thing, it is probable that Carver returned
to the story in order to tell the trutha decision that would separate
his work from Lishs editorial inuence and communicate the reality of
hope that was oered to Carver and his characters through sobriety.
It is, perhaps, helpful to consider Carvers return to A Small, Good
Thing in conjunction with Paul Ricoeurs theory of the new horizon.
Ricoeur suggests that interpretive reading is concerned with the permanent spirit of language. By the spirit of language we intend not just
some decorative excess or eusion of subjectivity, but the capacity of language to open up new worlds. Poetry and myth are not just nostalgia for
some forgotten world. They constitute a disclosure of unprecedented
worlds, an opening on to other possible worlds which transcend the established limits of our actual world (48990). Applying Ricoeurs theory
to Carvers life and ction suggests that when Carvers own narrative
of self-destructive alcoholism intersected with the healing oered through
the higher power, a new horizon opened to him. As the spirit of language led Carver to the possibility of this new world, Carver, like the
narrator of Cathedral, was transported beyond his own limitations
into a new life and vision of hope. In this context, the process of revision actually becomes a re-visioning towards a new reality, as characters and content are transformed into the possibility of recovery.
Therefore, despite the same characters and general plot progression,
Carver could honestly say that The Bath, as edited by Lish, was not
related to A Small, Good Thing at all. In short, Carver could not
remain content with the message communicated by The Bath and
found himself compelled to proclaim the largess he originally communicated in A Small, Good Thing, a reality that more accurately aligns
with Carvers own redemptive experience.
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Alcoholics Anonymous states that seeking reconciliation is the beginning of the end of isolation from our fellows and from God (Twelve
Steps 84). This is particularly profound when one considers that characters in The Bath, as edited by Lish, illustrate complete isolation,
whereas, in A Small, Good Thing broken lines of communication are
reconnected.5 Carver not only reconciles the characters of A Small,
Good Thing, he also leads the disconnected parties into a meal reminiscent of the Eucharist, which leads Ewing Campbell to suspect that
at this moment a conversion follows (55). In the midst of what should
be anger and fractured communication, Carver joins these disconnected
people through confession, sunlight, and the breaking of bread.
A similar illustration of recovery surfaces through the posthumous
publication of Kindling in Call if You Need Me. The story, one of ve
previously uncollected stories, was found in Carvers writing desk in Port
Angeles, Washington. Kindling becomes increasingly signicant when
contextualized within the larger Carver corpus, as the main character,
Myers, is a gure who reappears in four dierent collections. In Put
Yourself in My Shoes, published in 1976, Myers is temporarily liberated
from writers block at the expense of a familys tragic circumstances.
Years later he reappears In The Compartment. This time, on a train
trip to visit his son in Strasbourg, the struggling writer is edgy, for he
has not seen his son in eight years. When the train stops in Strasbourg,
Myers realizes that a watch he bought for his son has been stolen. In
this moment, Myers suspects the whole reunion is wrong; he wanders
around the station and hides from his son. In confusion, he exits and
then boards the wrong train, literally becoming a lost and misguided
foreigner.
In Call Me if You Need Me, Myers makes a nal appearance in
Kindling. Nearly twenty years after Carvers death, it is evident that
the author-creator went back to reimagine Myers in light of a new horizon. Carver starts Kindling by stating, It was the middle of August
and Myers was between lives. The only thing dierent about this time
from the other times was that this time he was sober (7). The Myers
we meet in Kindling is shaky, but a man changed for the better.
Although still terse and insular, he is a humble man, open to some
degree of conversation and relationship. In contrast to the concluding
disconnection of previous endings, readers nish Kindling knowing
that Myers is on a path to recovery and stability.

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Step Eleven: Wordless Prayer and Talking Symbols


Sought through Prayer and meditation to improve our
conscious contact with God as we understood Him, praying only for knowledge of His will for us and the power
to carry that out. (Twelve Steps and Twelve Traditions 98)
Alcoholics Anonymous frequently mentions that in group meetings and
personal life there are really no required prayers. Although most feel
that some form of prayer or meditation is necessary to maintain sobriety, specic prayers are only suggestions (Wilcox 73). As a participant
in Alcoholics Anonymous one might expect that Raymond Carver would
have incorporated a method of meditative prayer in his life. The fact
that he did so suggests that Carver took Step Eleven of the Twelve
Steps to Recovery seriously. Carvers own handling of words made his
meditation practices compressed, even wordless, as natural images rather
than words, became the vehicle for communicating with the ineable
something.
Near the end of his life Carver received an honorary Doctor of Letters
degree from the University of Hartford. At the convocation he oered
an address that was later titled: Meditation on a Line from Saint
Teresa. Written in 1988, it stands as the last piece of published prose
that Carver completed. He opens his address by quoting a line by Saint
Teresa that was used as an epigraph by his wife, Tess Gallagher, for
her collection of poems titled Amplitude. Quoting Saint Teresa, Carver
rededicates himself to her belief that: Words lead to deeds . . . They
prepare the soul, make it ready, and move it to tenderness (No Heroics,
Please 223). After commenting on the beautiful truth of the phrase,
Carver repeats the passage, noting that the text may seem foreign to
an age that no longer thinks of words as bearing meaning. Particularly
moved by soul and tenderness, Carver confesses that There is
something more than a little mysterious, not to sayforgive meeven
mystical about these particular words and the way Saint Teresa used
them, with full weight and belief (223). Carver then moves toward a
profound closing passage, a benediction that echoes the Apostle Pauls
charge to work out your salvation with fear and trembling (Phil 2:12,
NRSV). He states:
Long after what Ive said has passed from your minds,
whether it be weeks or months, and all that remains is
the sensation of having attended a large public occasion . . .
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try then, as you work out your individual destinies, to


remember that words, the right and true words, can have
the power of deeds. Remember too, that little-used word
that has just about dropped out of public and private
usage: tenderness. It cant hurt. And that other word:
soulcall it spirit if you want, if it makes it any easier to
claim the territory. Dont forget that either. Pay attention
to the spirit of your words, your deeds. Thats preparation enough. No more words. (225)
Those who knew Carver well comment on his almost sacred handling
of words. Jay McInerney, a former student under Carver, remembers
that as an instructor, Carver mumbled when he spoke. McInerney recalls,
if it once seemed merely a physical tic, akin to cracking knuckles or
the drumming of a foot, I now think it was a function of deep humility and respect for the language bordering on awe, a reection of his
sense that words should be handled, very, very gingerly. As if it might
be almost impossible to say what you wanted to say. As if it might be
dangerous, even (1516). In a similar way, Geoery Wol remembers,
that Ray believed in the power of language so profoundly, it was so
sacred to him, that he understood, as few people understand, that words
are loaded pistols. Sometimes to say something, to name it, is to enact
it. So there were certain words he would not say (Halpert 18485). It
is this reverence for language, the suspicion of its mystical and incarnational power, which causes Carvers spirituality to depend largely upon
ineable encounters with nature rather than the spoken word.
Encounters with natural symbols lead Carver, as well as his ctional
characters, towards an immanent engagement with transcendence, as
these forms contain the potential to communicate what language on its
own fails to describe. Tess Gallagher remembers that for Raymond
rivers were places of recognition and healing (Soul Barnacles 84) that
opened to possibilities of renewal and optimism. Twelve Steps and Twelve
Traditions actually uses the healing image of water when it states that
the persistent use of meditation and prayer . . . did open the channel
so that where there had been a trickle, there now was a river which
led to sure power and safe guidance from God as we were increasingly
better able to understand Him (112).
In Where Water Comes Together With Other Water, Carver arms
the healing message of Alcoholics Anonymous, as he meditates on the
glory of this water that gathers from springs, creeks, and rivers to join
the fullness of the sea. He writes: The places where water comes
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together / with other water. Those places stand out / in my mind like
holy places. For Carver, it is worth noting that the river itself is not
holy, but is like a holy place. As Paul Tillich suggests, holy things
are not holy in themselves, but they point beyond themselves to the
source of all holiness, that which is of ultimate concern (Dynamics of
Faith 48). As the poem concludes, Carvers focal point moves upstream,
as he longs to reach the source of everything that provides his fullness. The river, functioning as a signier to an upstream source, draws
in Carvers aection through its natural and expansive presence: It
pleases me, loving rivers. / Loving them all the way back / to their
source. / Loving everything that increases me.
Where Water Comes Together with Other Water is set at Morse
Creek, a place where Carver walked, sometimes daily, with Tess Gallagher.
Late in his struggle with cancer, Gallagher recalls that before a trip to
Alaska, Ray wanted to go to Morse Creek once more (Soul Barnacles
84). Now debilitated by lung cancer, Carver walked with his wife as
they proceeded on a slow and deliberate journey. When they reached
the mouth of the creek and gazed upon the fullness of water entering
the sea, they experienced a moment of spiritual and personal connectivity. In a moment that metaphorically communicated an experience
of new life, Gallagher remembers:
Without saying anything, we began to walk towards the
mouth where this freshwater river joins the Strait of Juan
de Fuca . . . [Raymond] was travelling on his remaining
right lung, but carrying himself well in the eort, as if this
were the way to do it, the way we had always done it.
When we made it to the river mouth, there was an intake
of joy for us both, to have crossed that ground. It was
one of those actions that is so right it makes you able in
another dimension, all the way back to the start of your
life. We savored it, the rivers freshwater outrush into salt
water, that quiet standing up to life together, for as long
as it was going to last. (Soul Barnacles 84)
Intent on communicating this message of hope, it is evident that Carver
did not conne the healing symbol of rivers to his own life, but used
the image to guide his characters as well. Although Kindling is published as an unedited story, lacking the compression of a fully revised
piece, this is, perhaps, advantageous for this illustration. Throughout
Kindling Carver provides numerous allusions to a nearby river; the
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mystical power of The Little Quilcene River communicates something


to an emptied Myers, a dried out man who desires restoration. It is a
powerful river that rushes down through the valley, shoots under the
highway bridge, rushes another hundred yards over sand and sharp
rocks, and pours into the ocean (Call Me If You Need Me 13). Although
the river is fast and purposeful, its central function comes through its
mystical ability to speak to Myers, the main character.
Myers comes into town and rents a room from a couple named Sol
and Bonnie. As the couple shows Myers the prepared room, he hears
the water for the rst time. Carver writes, Was it his imagination, or
did he hear a stream or a river? (9). Myers, known for being terse,
simply states: I hear water. Sol tells him of the Little Quilcene River,
but Myers oers no response. However, when the couple leaves, Myers
returns to the voice of water. He opened the window all the way and
heard the sound of the river as it raced through the valley on its way
to the ocean (10). Myers shifts the furniture in his room and moves
his desk in front of the open window, then stares at a blank page and
writes: Emptiness is the beginning of all things. Cursing his own foolishness, he turns out the light and stands in darknesslistening to the
rivers purposeful movement.
Myers healing begins when he nds a purpose. A atbed truck dumps
two cords of wood in the yard and he oers to cut the wood. Sol
teaches Myers how to use a saw and how to split the kindling. After a
days work, Myers returns to his desk and is able to write: I have sawdust in my shirtsleeves tonight . . . Its a sweet smell (18). He stays
awake into the night, thinking about the wood and what he accomplished.
Again, the voice of water leads Myers out of bed and his eyes are drawn
up the river. When he raised his window the sweet, cool air poured
in, and farther o he could hear the river coursing down the valley (18).
It is possible that this passage contains spiritual signicance for Meyers,
as Carver combines the voice of the water with the presence of wind,
the traditional symbol of spirit. In this moment Myers is circled by a
natural symbol of something beyond himself. As the cool air pours in
and permeates his being, Myers moves further towards recovery.
After cutting the wood, Myers decides to leave. However, he hesitates before leaving and opens the window again. In the darkness of
night Myers looks to the pile of sawdust and listens to the river for a
while. Concluding his stay, Myers returns to his table and writes the
nal passage on this stage of his recovery: The country Im in is very
exotic. It reminds me of someplace Ive read about but never traveled
to before now. Outside my window I can hear a river . . . After nishing
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his entry Myers decides to stay one more night. And before crawling
into bed Carver writes that Myers left the window open . . . it was okay
like that (20).
Something happened to Myers that bears the marks of an encounter
with transcendence. In his nal entry, Myers alludes to what is a common pattern in conversion narratives. He nds himself in an Edenic,
or exotic country. Like T. S. Eliot who writes that the end of our
searching Will be to arrive where we started / And know the place
for the rst time, Myers also experiences a similar encounter which
leads to revelation (Four Quartets, Little Gidding, 24142). He has read
about this place, this river, but not fully known it until now. For this
reason, Myers stays another night, not because he is tired or defeated,
but because this place feels like the home he has intuitively known and
longed for his entire life.
Step Twelve: Bearing Witness and Concluding Thoughts
Having had a spiritual awakening as the result of these
steps, we tried to carry this message to alcoholics, and to
practice these principles in all our aairs (Twelve Steps and
Twelve Traditions 109)
The testimonial component of Alcoholics Anonymous requires that the
recovered convert carry the message of redemptive hope to others.
Reecting on Carvers generous spirit, Jay McInerney remembers that
Carver participated in this call, as he often accompanied friends in
need to their rst A.A. meetings (19). In addition to attending meetings with struggling friends, Carver also wrote to those who found themselves dismantled by alcoholism. Gallagher includes one such letter in
Carver Country. In this letter, Carver provides a personal testimony of his
own struggle with alcohol and oers compassionate words of encouragement to Mr. Hallstrom, an unstable writer who has written to Carver
with concerns about sobriety and the temptation to drink. Carver concludes his lengthy letter in the following way:
Listen, Im glad you wrote me. Im sorry if this seems
hasty, or not very considered and thoughtful, but I wanted
to get some kind of response back to you before any more
time had elapsed.
Stay well. Dont drink, as they say. Think of me if ever
you feel like you want to drink. I know if I can kick it,
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well, then there is hope for just about anybody. I had the
worst case of it.
Write me again in a month or two, or whenever its
right, and tell me how you are and what youre doing.
This is with every good wish.
Warmly,
Raymond Carver (107)
Apparently, this letter to Mr. Hallstrom was only one of many responses
that Carver oered to those in need. As Gallagher indicates, theres
no way to tell how many writers and readers whod connected with his
escape from alcoholism were helped by him through the mails (Soul
Barnacles 219).
Recent scholarship is only beginning to realize that Raymond Carver
proves to be a model convert, one who was able to bear witness
to the possibility of recovery (Gentry and Stull 226). Jim Harbaugh,
a Jesuit and Twelve Steps retreat leader, recognizes the possibility of
using Carvers work in the Twelve-Step program. Harbaugh envisions
using Carvers ction and poetry to communicate hope to the client
who is resistant to the religious or philosophical language present in
twelve-step literature. Particularly optimistic towards the use of A Small,
Good Thing, Harbaugh suggests that The spiritual qualities found
in [A Small, Good Thing] might be a good way to describe spirituality without dening it in a way that puts o either religious or nonreligious people . . . [the storys spiritual qualities] are very consonant
with the qualities of the recovering person as described in 12 Step
literature (39).
Entering Alcoholics Anonymous simply requires that substance abusers
confess that they do not own the truth to categorically state that there
is no God . . . [however], as members recover, they no longer are in a
position to argue whether or not [God] exists, for denial negates their
own miraculous transformation (Wilcox 80). Without compartmentalizing Carvers spirituality into a theological frame of analysis, it is worth
considering that Carvers transformation may place him in the threshold of what Karl Rahner alludes to as anonymous Christianity. Rahner
states:
There is such a thing as anonymous Christianity. There
are men who merely think that they are not Christians,
but who are in the grace of God. And hence there is an
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anonymous humanism inspired by grace, which thinks that


it is no more than human . . . When we arm as a doctrine of faith that human morality even in the natural
sphere needs the grace of God to be steadfast in its great
task, we recognize . . . that such humanism, wherever it
displays its true visage and wherever it exists, even outside professed Christianity, is a gift of the grace of God
and a tribute to the redemption, even though as yet it
knows nothing of this. (366)
Rahners insights remain both controversial and thought provoking, as
his observations unify the humanist versus religious debate that continues to haunt Carvers work. Despite the reconciliation oered through
such a reading, approaching Carver though this perspective also assumes
that critics would be willing to reinterpret the meaning of humanism
and consider the possibility that immanent grace lurks in our world.
In the midst of Carvers spiritual ambiguity, perhaps only two things
are completely vivid. Something happened to Raymond Carver that
transformed both his life and writing. Second, the structural patterns of
at least some of the Twelve Steps of the Alcoholics Anonymous recovery program prove to be a far larger inuence on Carvers life and
work than critics have previously recognized. For those seeking clearer
answers concerning Carvers religious conviction, the answers are far
less certain. We are ultimately left with spiritual possibility rather than
confessional certainty, as Carver alone may claim knowledge of these
answers. In the last interview before Carvers death, the coughing writer
was condent in his faith when he stated: It will be okay. I have faith.
Im calm. I feel Im in a state of grace (Gentry and Stull 249). When
we push for spiritual certainties beyond what Carver has oered, we
are reminded of his echoing phrase: No more words. Silence must
answer what our words cannot.
N OTES
1 For example, even Kirk Nessets recent monograph The Stories of Raymond Carver:
A Critical Study (1995) fails to discuss the spiritual dimension of Carvers later
work.
2 Concerning biblical literacy, Carver remembers that we had the Bible in our
house but the family did not read [it] (Gentry and Stull 121).
3 Carver states: I cant honestly say Ive ever consciously or otherwise patterned
any of my stories on things Ive heard at the meetings (Gentry and Stull 40).
However, if Carver was a genuine participant in the Alcoholics Anonymous pro-

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gram it is also possible that he simply honored the A.A. pledge of anonymity,
which promotes humility and group solidarity rather than personal recognition
(Twelve Steps and Twelve Traditions 189192).
4 Steve Mirarchi compiled a variorum edition of Cathedral that compares the
1981 Atlantic Monthly version with the 1983 Knopf edition. Although these revisions are not addressed in this essay, Mirarchi makes the assertion that Carvers
specic revisions ultimately bring about a new discourse on religion (299).
5 For a comparative study see William Stulls, Beyond Hopelessville: Another Side
of Raymond Carver (9) and Kathleen Westfall Shutes, Finding the Words:
The Struggle for Salvation in the Fiction of Raymond Carver (34).

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Buber, Martin. The Knowledge of Man: A Philosophy of the Interhuman, ed. Maurice
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