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Chapter 41

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July 15, 2011,

If I ever become a popular animation creator and screenwriter, I could very well also
become a millionaire through up-front payments and royalties. Would certainly be nice.
In film, animation, and TV animation, being the Executive Producer generally means
youre in a position of power, regardless of your age, gender, or race. If youre an
executive producer, youve got a lot of power, and probably money as well. Executive
Producer is a nice title to have. A lot of work and decisions go with it, but so does all
the money and influence.
Either Im going to be writing 26 26-pg-long spec scripts, or drawing a 200-600-page
graphic novel, or both. I wont be writing the final drafts of all those spec scripts. Ill be
interacting with other screenwriters who will be writing and re-interpreting my original
literary work, punching it up, along with what might very well be a whole creative team,
if my books and scripts get optioned. Im still celebrating the writing of one spec script.
I think Ive gone far enough. I seriously dont think Im going to get any less respect
from people than I have. Phil asidehes sort of famous, tooit kind of stinks being the
only famous person I know. Honestly, Im proud of myself for finally finishing a nonsequitor first draft script of my project, but its lonely, backbreaking work. Kind of
depressing. Its hard to work when the environment Im working in is never supportive.
Things arent how they used to be. I miss how things were.
When youre a screenwriter, you never actually need to find people. If you write scripts,
in the eventual sense, other people always find you. Successful writers are always found
by other people. Other people always come to screenwriters, not the other way around.
All you have to do is have faith throughout your writing process.
Master Writer JM Strebler/Alberts Author Page Status

3 Journal Series
172 Collective Chapters (20-pg chapter books)
3,440 Pages of Writing

I WILL visit Asia and Europe at some point. But especially Eastern Europe, France, and
Britain. It would be nice to leave the U.S. for a while.
My Literary Journey is a Force of Nature. No amount of hellish disaster can alter that
course (of mine).

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Saturday, July 16, 2011,

I only seem to earn money when Im doing work thats away from the American
spotlight. I do MAKE money. But its behind the scenes. No one sees me make that
money. If my job is something everyone else is doing and everyone else can do, its kind
of no wonder I dont make a profit from it, like books, showbusiness and whatnot. I have
a lot of earning potential, but its only possible if peopleparticularly ones prone to
jealousy and envyare not aware of it. They ruin everything. Well at least in the United
States they do. The only source of income that I can cash in on and actually make real
money at is the kind no one really knows about in terms of the general public.
Now that I think about it, I do always feel like somebody is watching me and listening in
on my conversation, using advanced spying equipment, documenting my every
nanomovement, both clean and eccentric, for posterity. Get used to it. I guess.

Sunday, July 17, 2011,

I just realized something. The international community on the internetThe network of
billions of people. Thats the new underground. The cyber-industry. AMVs, OEL manga,
and webcomics are just some of the main manifestations of this new revolution. Theres
no real secret in terms of how to have a large audience automatically, but it is possible for
young people (and older people) to make a name for themselves in a way related to the
media that previously had never been possible. Webcomics and AMVs are no different
than indie alternative press print comics, independent and international film, or
underground music. Just like the underground generations in the 80s and 90s before it
when the underground really took off with punk, metal, and gothfor the most part,
none of creative people working in the industry are getting rich, but theyre certainly very
innovative. Innovation is a key element of what makes indie media indie in the first
place.
Whered you get all your money?? What a fucking stupid question. Thats the fucking
stupidest question I ever heard. Did some animation writer think up that question?
Political Talk with Joe:
Ive always wondered why, in the past, so many people have want to confront, defame,
instigate and fight me, almost like they automatically assume were natural enemies or
something, like thats theyre pathetic destiny to start a fight with me or something. Some
destiny. I guess it all goes back to the topic of resistance. Im pro-life, but Im also a fan
of the environment, and health care reform. So Im part liberal, part conservative. Im a
bit of both. Sure, why not? I dont vote, but I do hold many democratic values. I believe
in life in prison, not the death sentence. Its a barbaric showcase of a vengeful
afterthought. Killing another person isnt going to bring victims back. I also believe
firmly in due process. Of course, why not, right? I dont really believe in outsourcing of
regular jobs, only animation broadcasting imports from Asia and Europe. I believe in

Page |4

equal rights for all Americans, unless one Americans rights are impeding on another
Americans rights. And also, Capitalism and Free Enterprise can become threats to
Liberty and Democracy if Capitalisms power is misused. As for gay marriageI really
dont know how I feel about that. Im neutralNeither for nor against it. Im not
homophobic, but Im not entirely against gays being in a domestic setting.

Im on a drawing hiatus until my room gets cleaned and redone. Im in the process of
doing that now actually.
My newest art gallery is up, for display and for sale, on the internet. Art Flakes
approached me through email and asked me if I was interested in putting up a gallery on
their site where I can license my art as well as showcase it, which, aside from being
available worldwide on the internet, is hosted from a location overseas, in Berlin,
Germany, way over in Europe. So now Im selling my art and its available through the
German contemporary art market. And with a name like J.M. Strebler, I think its very
fitting I picked a German sounding art and literature pseudonym 5 or 6 years ago.
Strebler isnt exactly a made up name, though when I first heard that name manifest in
my head, I mistook it for a made up name. I was almost popular I hadnt heard it before.
But Strebler is a pretty German sounding last name.
Ratings seem to go through the roof whenever I do whatever it is I do best. Like when I
posted that picture one of my parents took of me working in my studio/room. It drove
ratings in any medium that copied it. Same thing with the wide-eyed cousin avatar or
the whole Grim Reaper things. It delivers the numbers, which is why people keep ripping
it off.
My next mini-project is going to be an interview I recorded during one of my lessons
with my old mentor, Phil. It really captures the emotional context of those lessons. Ive
heard the tape, and its one of the most lively recorded interviews with an animation
professional Ive heard in a while. What I sound like in that tape. Honestly, to me, I
sound kind of like a 21 year old stoner or something like that. Typical stoner voice. I
mean how often do you get to hang out with one of the animators of Doug and Beavis
and Butt-Head, in his own house anyway?
Why should I have to work for free? Why does Google choose to become a monopoly
and pay me nothing? Theyre so greedy, for a while now Ive realized theyve been
exploiting and taking advantage of me. Maybe I should sue them. Sue whoever is making
me not make money.

Im really only partially fluent in the Liberty BASIC programming language, just like Im
only partially fluent in the HTML coding language. Ive already mastered the ins and
outs of making your own DVDs. Ive made quite a few homemade DVDs of TV shows

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and movies. My collection of duplicated DVDs is HUGE! DVD authoring is a true art
form.

Areas of Creative Specialty (Expertise):

Art Direction
Production Design
Conceptual Design
Conceptual Lighting
Script
Screenwriting
Screenplay
Outline
Novel Manuscript
Narration
Character Design
Comic Books & Manga
Storyboards

Wednesday, July 21st, 2011

Theres dreams. And theres business. These two things are not always compatible.
Actually, most of the time they arent compatible. Both involve very different
circumstances.

Friday, July 22, 2011

Im leaving behind the whole art scene thing, just like my biological mother did. We
both ended up moving onto other things. It sucks, but thats just how things are
sometimes. Sometimes you make your choices and you have to live with them. Let
someone else deal with art politics and pressure. Im done with that. Its over. Im just
moving on to other hobbies. Im focusing on where I am, here and now, the real situation,
not the ideal one. And the real situation in my life has very little to do with art or
entertainment. Its very difficult and painful, for anyone really, knowing that you have to
give up on the only thing you have any real desire to attain. For a long time, the only
thing I wanted to achieve was success in animation or comics. It was all I thought about.
It wasnt easy realizing what I thought was my destiny really wasnt. It was my selfproclaimed destiny, not my real destiny. I wont fail obviously, but at the same time, not
getting the thing you want more than any other person or thing hurts and causes me just
as much suffering as any sort of failure would. Not attaining your number one goal hurts
just as much as failing at life or youre general career does. And all my bosses suck with
money. All the bosses Ive hadMike Lazzo, Eric P. Sherman, Stu Levy, Chad and

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Steve, Joey Manleyhave never paid me a dime for all the ways Ive helped them. They
ripped me off, big time, by making me work for free on every single thing I did online.
And here I thought if someone earns millions or billions of dollars for you, you actually
pay them something. My bad! Theyre cheap and are bad with money, even WHEN most
of them already very rich and everyone knows it. I do so much for them, and they never
pay me shit. So fuck em. Im not going to work for people on the internet who refuse to
pay me. They can fend for themselves, and draw theyre own audience, and not leach off
of mine, like corporate media parasites. Theyre like Suge Knight or something. Is it so
much to ask for ONE big business relationship with an employer, where I dont get
underpromoted, ripped-off, and exploited, shamelessly, where Im not treated like a
fool? The people who WERE following my career arent going to find much more of a
career available to follow. I hate it too much. Theyre going to have to find someone else
to obsess about. Im not an entertainer anymore. Im a scientist. I fucking hate arts and
entertainment. All I care about is science.
Bad Career: Sit around all day and wonder why Im not being productive.
Better career: Sit around all day and accumulate finances for then next 5 to 10 years.
It sucks, both suck in their idleness, but clearly ones easier for me than the other.
I dont think Ive ever been this angry in my entire life until now. I dont remember
EVER being this angry and hateful towards those who have wronged me. I didnt even
hate my public high school classmates this much, and I literally wanted to kill them. I
made numerous threats too, in private of course. Im beyond idle threats though. Im just
feeling animosity. Pure unadulterated animosity.

Saturday, July 23, 2011

There, got some sleep. Feeling not as angry, if at all. I just need some rest.
Im considerably less pissed and malicious now that Ive got a new thing to sleep on. My
new bed is more comfortable than the old one.

Yes, I am one of the main leaders of the anime, co-production, Franime, French comics,
internet, web 2.0, and new media movements. Im their leader! They wouldnt admit that
to you if you asked them, because theyre loyal to me and are protective of me against
enemies and rivals. But yes, they pledge allegiance to me. They are my army of fans. Not
all of them communicate with me directly, but yes, sometimes it actually does feel like
Im leading the Allied Forces of media or something. Ive made mistakes, but my friends
and followers never abandoned or quit on me, even when my image was attacked on TV,
message boards, on my rivals websites, or wherever. Ive still got tons of loyalists and
followers.

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New Work and Career Policy: If the industry wasnt CREATED, BUILT, and
PIONEERED BY ME, I refuse to work in it. I dont work in industries I didnt build,
hand craft, and create myself. If its on Wikipedia in any way shape or form currently,
fuck it, I have no desire to associate with it or work in/with it.

The Hero List

Goku
Batman
Harry Potter
Naruto
Edward and Alphonse Elric
Ash Ketchum
Homer Simpson
Peter Griffin
Inuyasha
Motoko Kusanagi
Monkey D. Luffy
Anakin Skywalker
Yusei Fudo
Samurai Jack
Homer Simpson
Avatar Aang
Prince Zuko
Prince Vegeta

Thats around 15 different franchises, almost all of them animation.

You know. The truth is, the real reward is in the Journey and the Struggle. Not in the
Completion of the Journey. Thats satisfying too, but speaking from experience, the act of
finishing is not always rewarding on a social level. I finished my first real first-draft
script a week or few ago. It was rewarding for me, but not for anyone else living with me.
How depressing.

Projects Yet To Be Achieved:

Parallax: The Cerebus-Frank Miller-Corey Doujinshi
The Fight Sequence Archives
The Parallax Script / Storyboard Archive
The Animated Series
The Online Writing Archives

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THE NEW To-Buy List!

Trigun: Badlands Rumble

Fullmetal Alchemist: Brotherhood
Priest (Live Action)
Trigun (Funimation)

My favorite things to work onAre the things no ones ever worked on before.
Innovation is its own reward. The things I make up are pure imagination and innovation.
If I do something for the first time, thats the first time its been done, by anyone, ever!
Its like landing on and walking on the moon every time I pick up a pencil. In asking
How I do something, you are also asking for the answer How do you do something
thats never been done before?

Tuesday, July 26, 2011,

Theres manageable work, which I ace nearly every time, and then theres manageable
living, which I fail almost every time. Sure the two are linked in more ways than one. But
theyre not at all the same thing. Not realizing this can be hazardous to your life and
health.
Ive come to a decision. After discovering the work of Henry Darger, which is around
15,000 or so pagesgive or takeI realized his was never a full on novel nor a full on
comic book. It was an illustrated folk art book. A storybook, much like Hipira by
Katsuhiro Otomo and Shinji.
Im really seriously considering illustrating a LOT of the prose Ive written. Not quite a
comic, and not quite a novel, even though I plan on writing and/or drawing both.
Illustrated fiction. Im actually beginning to plan on illustrating, writing, authoring, and
publishing manuscripts and books (even if just self-published) that are as developed in a
literary and narrative sense as they are in an artistic and design sense. If anyone can
create a story-book for Mature Readers with Dense Wording and Dense Pictures, outside
of Moebius and OTOMO, that person able to bring words and pictures together that well
could be me! Thatd be awesome! Some illustrated fiction is creepy. But not mine most
of the time, or at least not intentionally so. I want to make illustrated fiction a bit more
inviting. Prove to the world its not just comic books, childrens story books, and pulp
science-fiction fantasy novels that are capable of this. Plus, Im already comfortable
drawing illustrations and designs to go with what Im developing in my fiction writing.
The actual synthetic element itself is no problem for me! Because Ive probably got
Aspergers, few people could unite both sides of the brain, the Left and Right
Hemispheres together as beautifully and successfully. No wonder I like art books and
The Art of [Show Title Here] books so much! I have equal access to the Left and Right
hemispheres of my brain, to pictures and words. Those kinds of books appeal to me!

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They speak to me. They dont seem childish or weird at all to me. To me, they are
my second home: The Realm of My Imagination.
Nearly any and every picture can tell a story.

Wednesday, July 27, 2011

I finished the beginning intro segment of my Parallax / End Times illustrated, heroic
science-fantasy novel, the back-story chapter. My Forward segment, titled New Earth:
A World Rebuilt of Its Own End. The rest is going to be about the current world of
New-Earth, as opposed to just its main history and event history.
Will this book sell as much as Stephen King, Asimov, Harry Potter, and Twilight?
Extremely doubtful. But like any highly original and well done book, which I hope mine
becomes, it does stand a chance of seeing the light of day, and becoming either a pulp
and cult hit, or a bookstore bestseller. After all, not many people write traditional books
anymore. Its not exactly a popular thing to do among young people, so it turns out
theres less competition.
I have around 130 pages of preliminary story notations written and printed out, all
exploring the world of Parallax / End Times. Im already good at general writing and
authoring. And Im already sort of good at narration, outlines, dialogue, and description.
Now I just need to make a habit out of that last part: The whole literary fiction narrative
novelization thing.
Im going to make each story arc of End Times, (all 20 of them) around 20 pages in
length, of narration. That might just work. All chapters, and paragraphs and scenes (or
beats) are going to be out of sequential order in the beginning. If I made each story arc /
chapter 20 pages, the book would probably come close to being 400 pages. There
definitely needs to be a stopping point on this book project. Some point at which I can put
my project to rest, and look back at it in retrospectwhere I can read through it again
and again without changing itlike all the published novels I read. I plan on making the
binding similar to Manifesto.
Authoring End Times, and being a science-fiction, fantasy author is really cool. I might
be writing fantasy, but in terms of visual description and binding, one of my biggest
inspirations, other than Mario Puzos The Godfather, is John Steinbecks The Grapes of
Wrath. The 1 Conan pulp novel I own just feels too thin, too frail. I like my novels hefty,
healthy, and thick. Fat Books and Manuscripts in other words.

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Thursday, July 28, 2011

Parallax as Literature: The Main Themes

Good and Evil. Good vs. Evil. Right and Wrong

Greek and Shakespearean Tragedy
Rebirth and Regeneration
Heroes and Villains
War and Peace
Military Ballistics and Combat
Action and Adventure
God, the Devil, Religion, Magic, and Spirituality
Warriors
The End of the World (Setting; Backdrop)
Authority and Justice

So far (if rounded off by number) Ive written

20 pages of narrative fiction manuscript
30 pages of script
Thats roughly around 40-50 pages of pure storytelling and narrative, all written in the
last year and a half, starting with my CeltX and Microsoft Word files sometime in 2010.

Im not a big fan of being too prideful and doing too much Twitter blabbing. Its never
a good idea to blab about youre real powers online, on Twitter or anywhere else for that
matter. It can backfire. As the saying goes: Pride goes before fall. Thats incredibly true.
In terms of accomplishments online, never say what youve achieved before you achieve
it. Its the ultimate jinx. Secrecy has a very high market value apparently, and boy do I
have a lot of valuable secrets.
It used to be that TV was positive, uplifting, encouraging to the timid and meek, and for
the most part not overtly negative, confrontational, asshole-ish, and condescending. It
used to be that jerks didnt get ahead in TV, that nice guys finished last. All thats
changed. Now theres a whole epidemic of mysterious suicides in the TV industry,
particularly in reality TV, the worst of the worst, the most competitive of competitors.
Too bad theres such a high rate of suicides in TV nowadays. The news of course would
be all over it, if it had a conscience, but the news DOESNT have a conscience, just like a
lot of media nowadays, and therefore attempts to keep these statistics on the Dark Side of
Mainstream Broadcasting a Secret: All the suicides among the participants, almost like
theyre lives are worthless to the Executives. Thanks Viacom! Theyre the main guilty
party encouraging such ruthless behavior, outside of NBC and the TV news. So in away,
theyre RESPONSIBLE for said deaths, and yet theyre not held accountable in court, not
put on trial for their crimes against humanity through the media arts. No nothing. Quite

P a g e | 11

simply, TV gets away with murder, or at the very least responsibility for the death of
LOTS of people indirectly without facing jail time. I guess TV really has become dark
and evil. Business is considered more valuable than a persons life or humanity. And the
studio audience goes wild!

Been working out recently. Doing sit-ups, and also brushing my teeth more often and
whatnot. Its paying off. It feels good to have a workout routine. Even if its just 10 to 20
sit ups a day, three times a week. I learned from my brother Andrew, who works as a
trainer in a gym, that its okay to lose weight through brief, incremental exercise. Ive
actually lost a few lbs. this way.
Im focusing more on being an writer who moonlights as a designer and artist. With the
rise of the famous DeviantART, ASMB, and ANN websites, anime has become a
bitrelentless, for my tastes. Americans producing anything and everything that is
tangentially related to anime and/or manga is an incredibly unpopular concept with the
fan community, regardless of how much talent, drive, or creativity one actually possesses.
Theyre rip you limb from limb if you linger there. It pretty much doesnt matter who you
are. The racism and prejudice against Americans in anime and manga industries, and the
isolationist Japanese mentality against outsiders, not just myself but hundreds of others,
is a bit intimidating. More than a bit intimidating. Good thing I have words to fall back
on, and not just manga or anime scripting words. Words in general.
To achieve the power and longevity and long-term career of a Dave Sim or a Osamu
Tezuka, you need a few things: Physical activeness, humility, wisdom, confidence,
endurance, foresight, tenacity, bravery, focus, stamina, self-discipline, willpower.

Successful points:

The Clint Eastwood thing

The FMA commercial
Screenwriting
Novelization and Fiction Writing
Writing Fight Design
Mono Coat
Notan
Manuscript
Exercise
Saving and Waiting (Not Spending and Acting)

Friday, July 29, 2011,

P a g e | 12

In my fiction I write, the villains are always the same brand of person: The sadistic
sociopath. People like my neighbors and my top enemies. They dont just lack sanity.
They also always lack dignity, respect, and compassion, among many other things one
needs to actually be human and, well, not evil. I make the Rational and Guardian the
good guys in Oliver-E and End Times. Its sociopaths that I prefer to make my villains.
Most of my real life enemies are extremely sociopathic, so I base all the evil in my stories
on them, the Long Lost Descendent of the Hitler.
But enough about the bad guys. They get enough attention
More working out, more exercising. 2nd consecutive day of training and doing that sort of
thing. I guess I really do want to lose some of that weight.

Well, no offense to Amy Tan. Shes a good writer. But, why does Mom read Amy Tan
books so much lately? Doesnt she know? Isnt she aware? She already gets all the Asia
and Chinese and Southeast Asian Local Culture she can handle and get from me, the
Lone Wolf & No Cub! For I am part-Asian. Quasi-Mongolian Heritage: Right Here.
Im an honorary Asian in some ways. Sure some see me as an outsider. But others see me
as somewhat geographically displaced. Plus Im far removed from any records of any of
my Mongolian ancestry, but the DNA test I took as part of the Nat Geo Genographic
Project doesnt lie. Its actually pretty accurate. My former adoption case-worker
recommended it to me when I was researching the ancestry on my birth fathers side of
the family.
In a few days, Ill be just about 1/3rd of the way to reaching my financial goal for the
year. In that sense, things really seem to be turning in my favor. Its finally happening.
Im finally actually making some progress towards my goal. I can feel the change
lingering in the air, like a beautiful blue sky Central Florida day. Not an ugly cloud in
sightJust the Clarity and Glowing Light of Blessed Solitude, Wealth, and Career
Success.
ThunderCats Review
Tonight, Friday night was one of the best Friday evenings Ive had in a long time. I
watched the much promoted premiere of ThunderCats and technically, and in terms of
execution and story, it exceeded my expectations by quite a bit. A whole boatload
actually. It was beautiful feeling watching something so beautifully made and well
executed. The character design was aesthetically appealing, the story covered subjects
and storytelling methods Ive been into for a long time and love deeply, the voice acting
was really well casted and recorded, and the fighting was well animated and stagedchoreographed, very much along the lines of Joaquin Dos Santos (GI Joe: Resolute) style
action scenes. One of my favorite action guys out there. On the subject of Joaquin Dos
Santos, hes quickly becoming the American Yuen Woo-Ping of animation fight
choreography. Hes just become that good. And the man can fight really good in real life

P a g e | 13

too, according to interviews. His title of Dr. Fight is well deserved. I want to be that good
at action one day. Still got a while to go though. Right now, Im just happy for CN, for
producing a traditional cel-animation show thats 2-D and actually matches the level of
Stars Wars: The Clone Wars in quality. Not comparing the two shows, but if were
talking sword shows, those two are King.

I have no authority here. I have no real power in my own house. My real power exists on
paper, computer screens, and the internet. All these uninvited guests in my house are
really starting to ANNOY ME. When I get my own house, Im going to set up an electric
barbed wire fence around it. Thatll get rid of em.
Favorite current animation artists:

Corey
Joaquin Dos Santos
LeSean Thomas
Production I.G.
Katsuhiro Otomo
Jhonen Vasquez
Akira Toriyama
Todd McFarlane
George Lucas
Yoshiyuki Sadamoto
Musashi Kishimoto

The rewards are the easy part. Media coverage is the easy part once you finish your
actual real work. Its the icing on the cake. Finishing writing the script or writing and
drawing the manuscript, or selling the project is the really hard part because theres no
guarantee that A) Everyone will like you, and B) Youll succeed.
My artwork, writing, science, and creative projects are actually quite groundbreaking.
I didnt really notice how original my visual art style is until just now. The truth is, no
one can really draw exactly like I do. The closest people come to matching my style is by
copying my costume, or emulating the surface, which some people, who actually do
appreciate my art (surprisingly enough), do.
It seems as though whatever I talk about or that gets put online doesnt earn or
accumulate any money. The only things I profit from are the things I do in private.

P a g e | 14

Japanese animation artists and Japanese manga-ka dont normally name drop artists like
me. If ever. For the most part, unless the artist is incredibly popular and well liked or
dead, Japanese artists never name drop Western comics artists and writers. Ever.
I care more about 90s and early 2000s nostalgia than the current state of pop culture,
quite honestly. This world almost feels sort of alien to me in some ways. The first decade
of the New Millennium was a roller coaster. I wonder if the next decade, the second
decade, of The New Millennium will be as crazy and chaotic as the first.

Having good, trustworthy connections in China and/or Japan is like having money. Like
money, it takes connections in Asia to make connections in Asia. The internet is a pretty
reliable place to talk to people in Asia online. I know some of them are aware of me, but
they dont really seem to want a deeper connection with me to support my career and
business aspirations. I wish they understood my intent more. Asian friends can be hard to
make. But nonetheless, relationships and connections matter a whole lot in Asia, more
than in the United States.
As a Westerner interacting with Japan, from what Ive read on the subject, understanding
local etiquette, while appreciated, is not always necessary. What matters most is profit
and the actual businesses and the people and names behind the business itself. Japanese
for the most part dont expect Americans to understand or master local customs in
business relations any more than America expects Asians to understand its own etiquette.
Its quite close to being a mutual expectations. Culture looks important on the surface,
but its not as important as maintaining business. And I was worried about things like
speaking Japanese. They appreciate it, but I went to a store in Chinatown, Orlando, to
buy anime once, and the store clerks English was actually quite good. There was an
Asian-ish accent to her voice, but she understood what I was saying about anime and I
understood what she was saying. We were both speaking English. Its too bad that shops
not open anymore. Business transcends language and cultural etiquette boundaries, at
least as far as America and Japan are concerned. English is the business language of
choice in Asia. Even Anime News Network is in just one language: English. Its kind of
strange how that site talks about Japan so much, and yet none of it is written in Japanese
kanji (other than subtitles) or has a translate button for Japanese readers. Weird.
Whether Im writing a book or show, Im always trying to achieve and do the impossible,
or what at the time is perceived to be the impossible. Im always trying to find a way to
build that ship or elevate that bridge. I admire anime, because its the ultimate mini-max
solution. They work on miniscule budgets in small, quiet, humble work environments, on
schedules that are insane and scarily fast by American standards, and yet look at the
fantastical illusion they manifest and build on screen and on the page! Thats admirable.
Thats always been one of the main reasons Ive admired the Japanese animation staffs.
Theyre incredibly utilitarian. Theyre innovators. Like Disney and Fleischer who they
were influenced by and who came before they, they also demonstrated a strong desire to
test, transcend, and ultimately destroy production-scale boundaries. I spend a lot of time
thinking about how I can use that New Paradigm System Production and Franchise

P a g e | 15

Manufacturing System theyve built, and just go with that, apply it to my own projects
and my own work, whether its writing or drawing. I keep thinking to myself, how can I
take that system the Japanese artists perfected in Japan, and utilize it to suit my own
career and production process. Those same detail heavy illusions of grandeur, achieved
with minimal environmental resources. Is such a system of production possible in
America? I believe it is, as long as I believe its possible. And as long as we dont delude
ourselves out of working hard, daily and consistently.

Anime fans dont normally post writing or written works online. Anime is not exactly the
most pro-literate community in the world. There actually seem to be quite a few young
and dyslexic anime fans, so it can be a little hard to follow what some of them are trying
to say in their message-posts and storytelling. Though I am quite a good writer, I dont
feel its my job to review or teach writing. Writing is a solo, solitary act, which is
primarily attempted by older males, with some exceptions. Im just now realizing that if
its revealed I am a writer, some young, other writers might approach me for review and
advice, which Ive actually never really done before. Im not used to people showing
their writing and literature to me, usually they just want me to see their art.
Im having Ramen Noodle soup for dinner. Just the basics and all that.
I know theres a lot more to write about, but nothings coming to me right now. Not so
much writers block as it is me not getting any creative literature signals from the muse
hovering around me.
You know, it might just be smooth sailing from here on out. Honestly, Im unable to see
that many things, if anything, getting in the way of me and my goals.

Im the greatest graphic novelist, author, and inventor-engineer ever to live in

Casselberry, Florida. Of course, because Im the only one to realize this level of quality, I
have no choice but to work in secrecy and isolation.
You know, animation and comics dont pay very well. At the most, they pay 6 to 7
figures, at the MOST. No one other than the suits make 8-figure salaries or more doing
animation. Chad and Steve of YouTube fame and Mark Zuckerberg all make 100 times
more than pretty much anyone thats ever worked in an gotten famous off of animation.
Animation is chump change, especially cable animation.
There is a lot of baiting on the internet and TV going on in a secretive attempt to pull
information out of me on just about anything. Rivals are pretty clever when it comes to
baiting me to reveal anything and everything. They really just want me to say anything
and/or everything about anything and everything, primarily anything, as long as Im
writing or talking on the internet, there will always be someone waiting to steal that info,
secretly and behind the scenes of course.

P a g e | 16

Sumner Staff Meeting:

First on the agenda? JOE. Joe is online. We arent. Guy knows a whole LOT!
Yeah! Ive hearda that guy! Joseph something or other, whatever the fuck his name is
How do we get him to speak and give himself away?
Yes, indeed. How DO we get this guy to talk and tell us what we want to know?
Well dont compliment or pay him. Try insulting him. That usually gets em to talk.
Amen to that. Meeting adjourned.

I have yet to meet a fangirl who like intense martial arts action anime and manga half as
much as I do. Girls arent into action and weapons, and martial arts. Must be in the genes.
Girls arent predisposed to like those sorts of things. I cant think of many, if not any girl
artists who like martial arts and intensely violent action anime the way people like John
Woo and Tarantino do. Its not that girls dont know action. Its more like they just
naturally uninterested and uncompelled by it most of the time. Maybe theres some
female artist out there who does kick ass that I dont know of, but I certainly havent seen
any girls into that sort of thing YET. And if you do see some drawing that way, its much
like drawing a character with my costume design. It feels unnatural, like they yanked it
from artists like me just to act out and show theyre different than the pack. Very
artificial, superficial and unnatural.
To be quite honest, Im now pretty sure social phobia is actually stopping me from going
out there and actually promoting my work I any way, which isnt surprising to me at all.
Youre not a good in person social seller if you have social phobia. It prevents you from
doing that: Selling in public is a torturous process. As a matter of fact, any public
appearanceregardless of its corresponding statusis a torturous process. The most
popular comics and animation creators dont seem to have social anxiety and social
phobia. Neither does anyone on television, otherwise they probably wouldnt be on
television.

Well, Im pretty much done with art for now, so I guess Im pretty much done with sites
like DA and ASMBforever. Pretty much. From now on its TV, DVDs, and reading.
I dont have a lot of material power. But to a degree, I do have a lot of Spiritual Power. I
have a humanitarian power, and a moral power. Its all the intangible energy and power
and connection to chi and chakra energy. I have access to all sorts of mysterious spiritual
and mystical energy.
I really need to stop hiding my sexuality. Im an adult. Adults dont really need to hide
their sexuality, even if they have social phobia. Or maybe adults with social phobia hide
their sexuality too just like they did in childhood. Adulthood is confusing. I guess I didnt
realize I was an adult until just now: Sunday, August 07, 2011. Childish things like
cartoons, unless theyre action or science fiction or fantasy, are losing their appeal to me
as a male adult. The 2000s was a confusing time for me and many other people, and it

P a g e | 17

wasnt easy becoming a man. But I now realize Im an adult, a man. I should do things
adults do and be a real man and not shy away from my masculinity, whether its facial
hair or hygiene or my career. Definitely not school and childrens animation. Or anything
with the word teen in it.

If I had an extra 20 to 40 million dollars, Id offer it as an appeal to Funimation as a

sponsorship project for the Funimation Channel, and see if I could get it bought by one of
the major conglomerate digital cable providers, like Time Warner and Bright House or
DirecTV.
BOOM!
Anime on major TV, for everyone in the United States and maybe abroad. Ta-da!!!!
Toonami left too strong of an impression on me for me not to go in that direction if given
the investment opportunity. I WANT to invest in Funimation. I like them as an anime
company. I dont want creative or managerial input. I just want to cover their expenses
they might need to reach the largest possible audience.
Any money I make on the market is going to go toward investing in even newer projects.
Ill probably always be working on something for the rest of my life.
Some people believe my old living quarters in art school, the student dorm, Sunrise Hall,
was haunted. Butt thats really just folklore, due to the alleged speculation about the
buildings history of maybe being a shady building in a former incarnation.
Im not a minor. Not a boy, not a woman or bitch, not a child. Im a man. A big,
sometimes smelly, hair, ogre-ish man. Im an adult, and I want and deserve to be treated
like an adult. I enjoy all of the privileges adulthood brings, that children dont have or
attain.
Currently watching: Pokemon: Giratina and the Sky Warrior, on Windows PC.
Japanese filmmaking production values are some of the best production values,
internationally, in the entire world. Theyre quite competitive, in the fact that they rival
even North American and French filmmaking production values.

I have the mysterious and mystical ability to determine and measure, or quantify, kinetic
energy and energy levels when they are at their highest. Having a lot of power myself, I
can sense powerful energy in others. In other things and people. What I consider the most
intense, IS the most intense. In the world, sometimes. Everytime a high energy wave goes
off, I feel it vibrate and reverberate within the essence of my spirit and being.
I originally wanted to make TV more cinematic. But that backfired. Due to lack of an
opportunity to have input on TV networks on my part, as a result of creative ignorance

P a g e | 18

and cinematic negligence on traditional TVs part, regular TV animation is actually less
cinematic and epic than ever. So I wonder, is it possible to make comics and illustration
more cinematic than TV animation? I believe it is. If books and comics can be more
literary than TV animationliterature is different from cinemathen they can also be
more cinematic. There will always be the token cinematic show on TV thats better than
most of whats on TV, that happens to have better lighting and choreography and
storyboarding and production design, sometimes all of those things like Star Wars and
Generator Rex, but for the most part when you invest in TV, in terms of the way most
people look at it, youre aiming pretty low. Sharks dont really know how to make real
cinema. Only artists and filmmakers do.
Cinema is all about shadows, low-key lighting, cinematography, editing, writing,
costume design, light concept design, and production design. These elements manifest
real style, and are the easiest routes to producing something stylish.

August 13, 2011,

I think Ive finally actually outgrown animation and comics.
I still have to get that file cabinet put in my room.
My office-bedroom is pretty much done being renovated. It has a fresh feeling to it. The
rug has been replaced with a new rug, and the walls have been repainted and painted
over. I also got an entirely new bed, a king size bed. Damn I love that office. The wide
screen TV is a nice touch too.
Overall, I feel refreshed. Not much new stuff to write about though. Same old, same old.
Showbusiness isnt really made of Starters, valuable as they are. Hollywood and
Showbusiness really only listen to Finishers. People who Complete stuff. You can only
sell a Project if its Blueprints are Finished & Complete. Its not easy to start, but
Analysis Paralysis often blocks the Path to Finishing & Completion. Projects are
Meaningless and Non-Valuable to me unless theyve Attained Completion. First Draft
Completion, at the very least. Im just as guilty of being sidetracked in this area as all the
other comics & animation writers and artists out there.
Things that need to be Complete before they are sold:

Screenplay: First Draft

Novel: First Draft Complete
Comic Book Graphic Novel: Complete
Animated Series Pitch Bible: Complete
Comic Book Page(s): Complete
Script Page(s): Complete
Manuscript Page(s): Complete

P a g e | 19

I think Im going to start modeling my action sequences after the works of the Master of
drawing Fights in the West, Joaquin Dos Santos. I like the kind of anime influence he
utilizes. I shouldnt just assume Im going to get a job in animation. Those positions are
limited, and everyone wants one, and theres a lot of competition for a spot working on a
TV show. Just assume the opposite. Its safer to assume it will never happen, and just
focus on what I can do, the things I can do on my own and by myself, without having to
be part of a team. You dont need a team to learn to master screenwriting,
storyboarding, and perspective, and you dont need a team to teach yourself design and
Adobe Photoshop. The only thing you really need a team for is to do the actual
animating, and producing the actual animation you see on screen. Most pre-production
related work (scripting, storyboarding, production design, concept and character
design) can be done by one person, at home. Im glad I finally learned that secret. Too
bad it took me so long to learn this. I produce pre-production art and scripts as a
hobby, not as a profession. Its doujin or fan pre-production, in other words. My
work isnt polished enough to ever be used on TV. Not currently anyway. If I submitted
it, no one would accept it. Theyd say it sucked, even if it was moderately good. Thats
just how TV animation is. Its tough. Its mean. People, projects, and ideas get rejected
and tossed aside every day. Thats nothing new. Its a bad idea to just assume youre
going to get rich and powerful and famous in television animation of all places (?!) Better
to just assume your project will die a miserable death and put you out of a job, like most
would-be TV projects out there.
Other artists ripping off my art doesnt really get to me like it used to. Honestly, I dont
give a shit about those guys/gals anymore. Theyll develop reputations as plagiarists soon
enough. I really dont give a shit about that bullshit anymore. It doesnt matter to me
because thats contingency elements. I really only care about actual work, and my own
innovation. Being a supergenius and whatnot. I care about actual drawing, which is
something those plagiarists never care about. All they care about is copying and
duplication, not quality or originality.
Apparently no oneespecially Sumner Redstone and his pro-sociopath organization
Viacom and MTV/Nickelodeonhas the power to stop or interfere with me doing pretty
much anything and everything I inevitably do in reality. These people actually think they
have more power than they do. No ones really stood in my way so far from doing
whatever the hell I feel like. I dont see why anyone would succeed at that now. No ones
really encroached on me or interfered with my actions so far. I do whatever the hell I
want to do. Why would that be any different than how its already been? I dont feel
threatened at all. The competition is pretty damn weak and patheticif you actually
want to call it competition.
I dont really know if I can handle being as popular with the media as I am. Theres a lot
of demand for knowledge of my activities and whereabouts, even when Im not even
doing anything important.
Ive given the world, and the culture of the world, a lot of things, both directly and
indirectly.

P a g e | 20

There is an overpopulation of content in my house and on my computer.

Things I have too much of:

Websites
Videos
Books
DVDs
Commentary Journal Writing
Artwork
Writing
Scripts
Music

Drawing comics isnt just about drawing pages and panels. Its about drawing panel
drawings with appeal. Ones that have an aesthetic charisma to them. I think that was sort
of missing from my drawings for a while.

Maybe if I lived in France, and not Florida, and spoke French, the Japanese might stop
being so afraid of me. Yeah right, like Id ever be that lucky.
Japanese artists are always where you want to be, and never actually where you are.
Do people really get what they deserve in real life?

Ive recently discovered what my natural comics and sequential art style is. Lots of action
and fighting, big cinematic panels, large drawings.
Now that I know what my own comics-producing style is, the choices I make suddenly
feel more natural to me. Damn Im talented! Ive done around 40 to 50 pages or so in my
natural style, though a lot of them were thumbnails, just me feeling the style out, and
trying to get accustomed to it and drawing that way. I can tell this is my natural style
because I can draw this way even when I dont feel like drawing, much like my writing
process for Manifesto.
Most of my comics page layouts have 2 to 3 panels, give or take.
Im starting to develop late Twenty-Something Complacency. Im a little smug about
where I stand by now. Im not insecure like I used to be. If someone talks badly about
me, Im more likely not to react, or god forbid overreact. I have no control over how
people talk about me or react in regards to me. Im too complacent to talk back. Or write
back for that matter. Im VERY complacent. Im satisfied with my career, social status,
public standing, and financial status. Im about as complacent as they come. I have no

P a g e | 21

real reason to be dissatisfied. My youthful upstart unrest and dissastifaction phase seems
to be over. I have nothing left to prove. Ive done a lot of work. Been on a lot of websites,
wrote a lot of pages, and drew a lot of pages. My prolficacy assures me Ive put a lot
more effort into my career than I ever needed to. I have enough work Ive created in my
young adulthood to last me the rest of my life. I have enough sketches and scripts and
writings. I dont need more unless its on assignment. I hate to admit it, but Im feeling
complacent. Very complacent. My life is easy. I like being smug.
Honestly, I dont have that same kind of energy and hyper-manic energy I had as a child
and teenager. Im an adult now, and my laid back, relaxed demeanor and attitudes are
beginning to reflect that. My age (27 going on 28) is showing now. I dont seem to be
possessed by delusions of youthful energy anymore. Everyone working in TV is a bunch
of 30 and 40 something hyperactive idiots. I wonder what they do in their spare time
when theyre not acting hyper-idiotic on TV all day. I still have energy to draw and write,
and watch TV and videos, but I dont really feel like I can multitask a dozen different
things at once every 10 minutes like I used to. Wisdom and energy are not one in the
same. Often they are at 2 separate ends of the spectrum of age. At the beginning of the
age spectrum is energy and initiative. At the end, is wisdom, power, and complacency.
As a matter of fact, most comedic actors on Television nowadays and in Hollywood have
the energy level of a 12 year old, and are indeed quite childish, and its almost like they
expect me to act that way too. Enjoy being a child. I have no desire to compete, in terms
of energy level. Im too old to be 30 or 40 and acting like that. Its pretty darn pathetic.

Artistic Influences (that I need to outgrow)

Bruce Timm (Batman)
Todd McFarlane (Spawn)
Frank Miller (Sin City)
Jhonen Vasquez (ZIM, Nny)
Katsuhiro Otomo (Akira)
Hiroaki Samura (Blade)
Yoshiyuki Sadamoto (Evangelion)
All my favorites in other words. If I want to truly be remembered, Ive got to do
something newer than all of that. I cant let myself be overshadowed by some other,
older, professionals style for the rest of my career.

I suppose it was bound to happen sometime. They are pretty pathetic in that area.
Adult Swim is being pursued by watchdog groups for obvious mishandling of sexual,
drug-related, and language content. Family Guy is clearly the worst offender. If it were
shows I actually liked it would be different, but Family Guy and American Dad should
seriously have a TV-MA rating for every episode, not just some of them. On the plus

P a g e | 22

side, doing that might just be enough to kill their undeserved Nielson Ratings. So it all
works out.

P a g e | 23

P a g e | 24

Chapter 42
(XP)

P a g e | 25

Wednesday, August 17, 2011

Its weird that I have a sixth sense for sensing your intentions. Other peoples intent.
Whatever. Its all the same thing.
Im a shut-in, and a reclusive hermit for a very good reason. Im psychic and have the
powers of an empath. My emotions are just too overwhelming for me to be around other
people or groups of people, whether its at a college or in traffic. My empathic powers
overwhelm me every time I do interact socially with people I havent known for years.
My powers have driven me into hiding. It truly is a burden. My family has never
understood this, especially my adoptive parents. Television can be overwhelming too,
particularly if the program involves intense suffering, whether for horror or comedy.
Either one is terrifying for me.
Archetypes often arent meant to be profitable. Archetypes are something God himself
chooses to have society emulate. Like Albert Einstein, or Steven Spielberg for example.
Theyre not just models for society. Theyre archetypes. Images in culture that are so
divinely perfect, God himself chooses to let society imitate endlessly, whether the
archetypal person or thing wants to be imitated or not. Mythology means dealing with
Gods. Often things that are archetypal, true archetypes are in fact copied because they
DO come from the Gods.
Mono Jubei is a Heroic Fantasy Archetype that I created, much like a Greek God. A new
kind of generational example, much like Gandalf or Batman. Only more current. You
cant really copyright something like that, that so many people emulate nowadays.
Though I am pretty smart at certain things, I definitely come from a humble background.
I come from the school of hard knocks. I was never on the street, but plenty of people
around me growing up have been.
It sort of feels like TV has lost its united and collective element. People dont watch TV
together in their living rooms as much anymore. Thats a damn shame.

Friday, August 19, 2011,

Sometimes its not easy to not care what other people think of you. I find that normally, if
someone is trying to bait or instigate me, there are usually some emotions that other
people seem to always want to evoke: Anger, rage, embarrassment, fear,
humiliation. If a person can learn to categorize and control these emotional
reactions, the bait loses its power, and henceforth dies off. Insulting someone who
cares what other people think of them is a power move, based entirely on visceral and
emotional control and impact, the gut reaction (fear, anger, embarrassment) it tends to
evoke. Not caring what others say or do about you means cutting oneself off from being
vulnerable to such emotions. Often the only power some people have over me is the

P a g e | 26

emotional power of a bully. Once the emotional control dies, so does the control of the
one seeking control over me (the ability to get a reaction by saying rude and nasty
things).
Its hard to be angered or embarrassed by just about anything on TV, comedic or
otherwise, once you become aware thats exactly the kind of emotional reaction
theyre hoping youll have. Kind of takes the vitality and strength out of that kind of
thing, I think. As long as youre aware theyre trying to anger and embarrass you, its
pretty easy to not feel any of those emotions. Im a psychic. Peoples intent, whether in
my face or on TV is transparent to me. Its amazing to think I never used this fact to my
emotional and physical advantage before, particularly when I watch TV.
It is nice being one of the most influential artists today in the American webcomics and
manga scene. Ive actually influenced some very influential artists all over the place, the
entire country if not worldwide. Success never officially starts in terms of the fame. My
success and rise to influence wasnt sudden or overnight success or five minutes of
fame. It was a gradual increase and Ive been one of the most influential auteurs in the
world for years now. People find out about me, but they hardly ever forget me once
theyve heard of me. I dont need press coverage to realize this. Plenty of people in the
know already consider me influential.
Other powerful people and things (besides myself) that dont get featured on TV
(currently):

Zen and the Art of Motorcycle Maintenance

Ken Wilber
A Heartbreaking Work of Staggering Genius
Cerebus The Aardvark
Johnny the Homicidal Maniac
Blade Runner
Primus
Spawn
Blade of the Immortal
IGPX
The Lord of the Rings

Is not drawingwhen you dont feel up to itprocrastination from a job, or is it merely

resting, and taking a break and vacation from your day job. Different artists will tell you
different things. Some think you should draw regardless of whether you feel up to it or
not, and some think the most you could produce on an off day is crap. Im having some
difficulty deciding which mold I fit into better.
If there are three things I know, they are fantasy, design, and science, give or take
lighting, literature and architecture.

P a g e | 27

Its a good idea to put every genre-based artistic and literary influence I can get my hands
on into my design process. You can never incorporate or combine too many different
styles from other people into your style.
Not getting angry, not getting embarrassed, and generally not caring what critics, bullies,
and detractors in general think of me is becoming an increasingly easier goal to
accomplish, and that all started today! I feel a LOT better. All I had to do was learn how
to control my anger and potential for embarrassment at the hands of others, and suddenly
those emotions (anger and embarrassment) have lost their influence on and power over
me. To stop your emotions from controlling you, you must first identify them, and to
identify them you must recognize how they make you feel. And once you know what
they really feel like, you can defend against those emotions and suddenly they dont feel
like they have any control over me whatsoever. People continue to say things. They
always will, but now its a lot easier not to react to or be controlled by it. Im chilled out.
Ive got the Buddha in me. Im glad I remembered that I do have the Buddha in me,
somewhere, buried and forgotten until just now, but still waiting, even after all this time,
to be awakened.
I dont really have a choice. I have to draw. It doesnt matter how much I hate drawing,
or if the fact that I dont like drawing shows through to other people. Drawing is the only
choice. I have to suffer for my art. There isnt really another option. If I pursue art I will
suffer. I can accept this.
The only two anime that I can think of that the normal regular non-anime-fan people in
my city who arent into anime know of would be Pokemon, and maybe Dragonball and
Sailor Moon too. Naruto and Yu-Gi-Oh arent really known by everyone in all cases.
Because I am one of the most talented American manga comics artists and designers, the
entire success and survival of the American manga industry hinges upon me being able to
master drawing comics pages. Im not any good at that specific thing now, but as long as
I keep at it, one day Ill master it. In art and the world of drawing comics panel-pages,
you get good by imitating and copying from other artists, most likely your idols. At least
in the beginning, copying helps add structure.
Artists who encourage copying from the Masters as a way of practice:

The Japanese
Korean Artists (Animation, Manwha)
Chinese Comics/Animation Artists
Phil
Todd McFarlane
Paul Pope
Rima Jabbur
Chandra Free
Steve Ressel
John K.

P a g e | 28

Me
Bruce Timm

Types of Master Studies: Sources to Study (Copy from):

Renaissance Art (Classical Master Studies)

Japanese Anime (Anime Studies) (anime animation cells, storyboards)
Japanese Manga (Manga Studies)
Image Comics and Dark Horse (Image and Dark Horse Studies)
SLG Comics and Oni Press (SLG and Oni Studies)

JOSEPH ALBERTS! J.M. ALBERT! YOU, MUSTDEFEND YOUR TITLE!!!!

Ok, strategizing time:
First off, copy-drawings. I have a lot of copying left to do. Ive probably got at least a
few thousand pages of comic book reference material to copy from, from all sorts of
artists and all sorts of titles to copy from and master mimicking.
Also, I finally drew again today, right around 2:20 in the afternoon to 2:15 p.m., thanks to
some 5-Hour Energy drink.
Upon drawing a decent practice comic book page, Ive observed a few things. Drawing a
lot doesnt always make me suffer, especially if the drawing ends up being good,
sometimes art actually helps me suffer less. But there are some times when Im less
discouraged and look less forward to my work than others: Im most fatigued and
sickened when Im starting and/or finishing a drawing or project. The mid-level, or
middle of my process is the easiest, because inertia has been overcome if Ive finished
starting and the momentum caries me through my sometimes laborious process. Thats
the time I most subconsciously want to and desire to stop: @ The Beginning and @ The
End..
Also, as a comic book artists, you must realize and accept the fact that not every
finished and polished panel you draw and finish for your books and comics issues is
going to be perfect. Some will be flawed or sloppy. You can not let sloppy work stop
you from trying, making an effort, working, and moving ahead with the overall
project. For example, the page I drew today with Piccolo had 4 panels featuring Piccolo
(the whole page). I ended up with 3 strong drawings of Piccolo and 1 weak sketchdrawing, a very small one of reduced sized, which mimicked the originally drawing,
which frankly wasnt much better than my weak drawing either, so Im in good company.
A strong original drawing will often equal a strong copied master study. A weak
original drawing from another artist wont look good in the copied version either. A
copied piece of art is only as good as the original piece of source material.

P a g e | 29

Copying helps a comic book artist overcome his potential physical and psychological
inertia, and gain momentum by beginning to draw and finding it easy to gain momentum
and continue.
During the last 5 or so years, the vast majority of my artwork (somewhere close to 80%
or 90%, has been drawn in a vacuum, completely imaginary, improvised, and on the
spot. I did very little looking at other things or things around me when I drew, and it was
mostly designs of Mono, which would later on qualify as original. Most of what Ive
drawn in the last 5 or so years, the vast majority of it, has been made up, but
unfortunately the line quality was weak and frail and wobbly, because it wasnt based on
the sturdy, pre-existing foundational base of the art of artists with more confidence than
me. Ones in print, not so much on the internet.
Now Im going through a phase where Im feeling a yearning to return to doing copies
and master (Japanese) studies, to develop my currently weak draftsmanship skills. I miss
going on a swipe-a-thon. Im guessing since I have gotten better at original line-work, it
will probably be easier to do copywork in my own style now.
Ever since I was a teenage adolescent, Ive found Ive wanted the opportunity and ability
to compete and entertain on an international level. Literally become one of the worlds
greatest in the most literal sense possible. Not just with North America, Asia, and Europe,
but all continents in the entire world, from Africa to Australia and South America. In
other words, I want to be the very best and most influential, in anywhere, any place thats
good. The internet, once it was established in the late 90s and first decade of the New
Millennium, gave me a platform to test those waters in some ways, and in one sense, see
which people and which countries and continents, and which mediums and styles and
auteurs and tomes are truly the best (in the Entire World). Many people have not yet
learned how to think on an international level, but instead merely think on a local one,
because like most people, that is all they know. Because they do not have internet access,
theyre really only aware of whats directly around them, their local perception. But
theres a lot more to it than that. It started with Asian and European cinema, music,
comics, and animation, for both theatrical and televised release. But now, with the
assistance of the internet or world wide web (www), its flooded out into all sorts of
varied areas, but mostly through the internet and television.
Anime and Manga and Video on the Internetthe best way to describe its competitive
and international level element is sites like DeviantART and YouTube are kind of like the
Olympics of art, visualist auteur types, and narrative creativity.
But where do I stand on the international competition scale. Some call me one of the
best in the world, but I see a lot of flaws and weaknesses in my art. In terms of design,
I function and am used to competing on a technological and international media level,
and on a professional level, even when no ones paid me to compete. In terms of my
design ingenuity and skill level, Im pretty evenly matched with the American and French
levels. But Im trailing behind much of the Chinese and Japanese levels. But Im
probably well beyond most of the South American and Canadian levels. And considering

P a g e | 30

the Middle East doesnt even have any kind of industry standing for the most part, Im
light years ahead of that level, with exceptions like Rima Jabbur, who is Lutheran and
Lebanese-American. She can easily kick my and everyone elses ass in drawing.
Copying and imitation in art is a learning tool. You copy artists you like to get good.
Thats how I got good at art; that and drawing pictures just like I see them in my minds
eye. But yes, copy, copy, copy. Screw what some art teachers say. Copy everything in
your art. Its good to draw from life in terms of wrinkles in clothing, but thats nothing
compared to how useful of a learning tool copying the work of more established artists is.
Did some drawing today. Though I am by nature a perfectionist, Im going to have to
forgo the perfectionism, and abandon it, at least in terms of finished art. There are
pencilling or inking slip ups that can be found in just about any comic book series. I need
to learn to let go. Let go of my work and learn to pass the torch to my publisher and
editor. Im either going to have to settle for imperfect and complete with flaws or
imperfect and never actually finished. I guess I have no choice but to settle for the
former. My drawings are never going to be as perfect to my eyes as I want them to be,
meaning mostly as good as the work of certain artists I admire. But the art itself is still
better than that of many lesser artists. It still takes skill and talent to draft, even if it is
flawed in my eyes and embarrasses me. Better I be embarrassed of my early
imperfections than remain obscure forever. I dont even have to think twice about that.
Moebius and French comics aside, the Golden Age of comics kind of sucks, in the
same way both animation AND anime in the 1940s sucks compared to modern
entertainment in anime and Hollywood. Everything in comics and animation in the 1940s
looks so crude. Most comics made before 1990 to after 2005 kind of suck. The kind of
comics I draw are also the kind of comics I want to read. I studied the market very
carefully in the comics industry, and the kind of comics Ive always wanted to see, dont
exist yet, so Ive decided to design and draw the kinds of comics page I want to see
myself. Not too hard. I see comics that point in the right direction, but even Sin City can
feel kind of boring to me sometimes. Batman comics in my opinion are nothing
compared to Batman: The Animated Series, the first series and the later season revisions
with Glen Murakami, whoaside from Jim Lee and Tim Burton and Frank Miller and
Bruce Timmis the greatest Batman design artist ever. Im surprised there isnt more
conceptual artwork of Batman the way theres a lot of conceptual art for Star Wars and
Blade Runner.
Things Learned:
Writing about drawing a comic book page is no substitute for the physical act of sitting
down and drawing a comic book page.
If you want to get good at drawing anything, you have to draw that exact thingthat you
want to master drawingand draw it at least 100 times in a row, whether its costumes,
perspective, or fighting.

P a g e | 31

Drawing a comic book page with 2 or 4 or 3 panels is a lot harder than just doing one
drawing a page. Its harder to do, and takes a lot more patience and diligence. It doesnt
always have to be laborious and painful, if ever.
Carry your sketchpad with you everywhere, even after you think your done drawing for
the day. Tempting yourself to draw by keeping resources near you everywhere is a good
way to remind yourself you do have the energy to continue.

Though I am known as a major established comics artist, I have to say my main genre
isnt so much superheroes (Spawn) or shonen manga (Dragonball Z), but rather, newparadigm action comics. Kill Bill, The Matrix, and Blood+ meets comics and manga. I
dont belong to just one genre. Every genre I love, I make an effort to participate in, in
some way for the most part. Ive always wanted to draw action like Samura-Sensei. The
famous Hiroaki Samura. Hes famous for his epic samurai chanbara comics. Part of me
still wants to be him. Scott Pilgrim aside, there really arent any American manga
creators who specialize in sword manga and action manga on any kind of enduring or
permanent level. I want to change that one day.
When it comes to comics and panels, if you only draw 1 panel and call it quits, youre
essentially giving up. In comics, you either draw a whole page of panel artwork and
compositional combinations, or youre better off drawing nothing at all. If youre going
to go for something, if youre going to do this thing, you must give it everything youve
got: 110% Hard Work and Effort. It takes a certain amount of intensity and headspace to
create intense art. When youre not drawing the form of comics and contributing to the
industry and medium, then if youre not contributing, you sure as hell better be studying
it. If youre not working on your form, you sure as hell better be studying the different
kinds of form(s). Action storytelling, action sequence scenes, and ballistics/fighting,
much like art itself, is an artform you improve at with experience. I dont expect to
produce anything of worth in the comics art world until at least 4 years from now, when
Im 31 years of age and older. You have to be old to be a real professional. Some kids
Ive read about online actually want to get a job in comics at the age of 12! 12! And yet
no one says anything to shed light on how comics works. Most people dont break into
comics when theyre young. Especially not super famous artists. Most 12 year olds cant
even take care of themselves independently from their families, let along handle a fulltime career. Im in no hurry to get my name or work out there. Currently, now that Im
27, I really just want to make myself happy. And to make myself happy, I must get better
at copying comic pages other artists draw to teach myself that. The number of people
who draw actual comics pages is even smaller than the number of people who draw art in
general. Most people just want to do illustrations in a comic book style, but thats not
how its done. Even some pros make that mistake, of mistaking illustration art for
sequential art.
If Im being completely honest, I do enjoy talking about drawing and writing about
drawing a considerable amount more than I actually like the act of drawing itself. I like to
draw, to a degree, yes, but most of the time Id rather just look at art or write, as they feel

P a g e | 32

more easy to me. Drawing does feel natural, but it takes a certain amount of force on my
part that I tend to feel is exhausting and takes a lot of power out of me. It feels like
whenever I draw it send out some kind of energy waves throughout the media, whether I
document my process or not. Kind of cool. It feels powerful! Particularly in the morning.

Discussion of Influences:
Influential American Pen-&-Ink Artists
Jhonen Vasquez
Min-Woo Hyung
Fung Chin Pang
Jeff Smith
Dave Sim
Paul Pope
Bill Watterson
Evan Dorkin
Scott McCloud
Chynna Clugston-Major
Bryan Lee OMalley
Andi Watson
Bill Seinkiwikz
C. Scott Morse
Robert Crumb
Jim Mahfood
Nyanko-Chan
Becky Cloonan
I hope to incorporate artistic influence from the above artists, along with writing and
storytelling influenced by Steven Spielberg, George Lucas, The Matrix Trilogy, JRR
Tolkien and the Lord of the Rings, Robert E. Howard and Conan the Barbarian, Michael
Moorcock and Elric of Melnibone, Yoshiyuki Tomino, Robert McKee, Maya Deren,
Rima Jabbur, J.D. Salinger, Elton John and Billy Joel, Japanese anime films like AKIRA,
CLAMPs X/1999, Ghost in the Shell, and Karas; Blade Runner, Cyberpunk, 1960s Shaw
Brothers Films and Hong Kong Cinema, Bruce Lee, Michael Jackson, Stephen King,
Billy Corgan, Tim Burton, Syd Mead, Zen and the Art of Motorcycle Maintenance,
Nietzsche, They Might Be Giants, Primus, Leonardo Da Vinci, The Italian Renaissance,
Michelangelo, Dragonball Z, Seinen manga and anime, Isaac Asimov, M. Night
Shyamalan, Production I.G., John Woo, James Cameron, Terminator, William
Shakespeare, Ken Wilber, Sun-Tzu, Lao-Tzu, Buddhism, Taoism, Zen, Pantheism,
Physics and Quantum Theory, Qualitative analysis, Integral Theory, Utilitarianism, The
Internet, the web 2.0, YouTube, Ridley Scott, Fritz Lang, Todd McFarlane, Bram Stoker,
Mary Shelley, Osamu Tezuka, Albert Einstein, The Beatles, Kurt Cobain, Johnny Cash
(The Man in Black), Fight Club, Kill Bill, Pulp Fiction, Ren and Stimpy, Beavis and
Butt-Head, Adult Swim, Pantera, Tool (Band), Limp Bizkit, Monty Python, Calvin and

P a g e | 33

Hobbes, Superjail, Toonami, Jean-Paul Sartre, Howard Stern, Shinya Ohira, Moebius,
Gonzo Studio, and Katsuhiro Otomo
Im not practicing an established genre, or one genre. I take influence from too many
different genres and creative or intellectual people to be weighed down by just one broad
category. Im practicing in the realm of an entirely new genre in and of itself, one that
doesnt really even have a name, or genre category yet. Im practicing my own genre:
The one I created.

Sunday, August 21, 2011,

Im considering dabbling in comics illustrations, just drawing a bunch of intro pages,
fully-fleshed out self-contained scene splash page intros, but to do this, I need to study
preexisting comics splash pages and perspective even more than I have been.
Money, influence, and power always come with a side order of hard work and decision
making
Turning Vision into Reality (From Bill Gates biography):
Vision does not start on the far horizon, or even the middle distance, or any time in the
future. It starts right under your nose, right where you are, in the proper understanding of
what is going on in the present, right here, and right now. Vision to Bill Gates is not a
competitive advantage in any way, shape or form for the Master Builder of
Manifestation. Vision Has To be in the Here and Now, accompanied by Action, Proactive
Thinking and general Action that Has the urgency and power to turn the Master Builders
Vision Into Reality. That Action of Manifestation needs resources and energy to turn
Vision and Imagination of the Future into Reality / The Present.

Make the future Happen by Taking Action, Here and Now by Acting, and as a
result, driving the business forward vigorously, into the future.

Never impede work, action, taking action, acting now, and progress for fear of
undercutting the current business.

Base vision and proper understanding on what is happening now.

Take all necessary action to protect the long-term future

If you are a 22 Master Builder, Based your career on what you see while growing
up, or now.

Glory, fame, fortune, prosperity, a better life, and a finished project wont happen
Tomorrow, Ever, unless you put in the time Now and set things into motion Today. The

P a g e | 34

only real Time in history you have to accomplish your dreams and to make your career
and industries grow and happen Tomorrow is by Acting Now. Not this year. Not this
month. Not this week. Not even Today, This Day. The only suitable Time to Accomplish
anything is Now. Starting Right Now, Over and Over Again.
Start Now.
Always Start Now.
Start Now, Over and Over Again.
No Other Time or DateOther Than NowIs Suitable.
The Place is HERE
The Time is NOW
NOW
HERE
ACCEPT NO SUBSTITUTES
Just realized something incredibly odd. People who appear by name or by face on the
internet are not judged by the same standard people whose names and faces appear on
television and movies are. Theres a segregated level of judgment there much of the time.
Fans of internet celebrities and internet figures like myself often seem to be a bit more on
the intrusive side than fans of people like, say, Tom Cruise and Britney Spears are. Its a
different perception. A different standard. A Blogger or webcomics artist is not viewed in
the same light as an animation auteur is.

Animation Outlets:
Cartoon Network
Adult Swim
Warner/DC
Anime
Pixar
NickToons Network
Nickelodeon
Williams Street
Nicktoons Studio
Cartoon Network Studios

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Favorite French Stuff

Favorite French Things:
Favorite French Film:
Le Samorai
Favorite French TV Animation:
Marathon Animation
Oban Star-Racers
Skyland
The Mysteries of Alfred Hedgehog
Storm Hawks
Code Lyoko
Favorite French Artists:
Moebius (Blade Runner, Akira)
Serge Pelle (Orbital)
Francois Schuiten
Juanjo Guarnido (Blacksad)
Enki Bilal (Beast Trilogy, etc.)
Favorite French Comics
Blacksad
Orbital
Metronom
Im beginning to wonder if I can even handle drawing somethingactually, anything, for
that matterthat actually managed to be 600 to 1,200 pgs. long. Shorter comics and short
stories, or snippets of action (like with End Times: Visions) seem to be my length, much
like many contemporary French comics auteurs, even Moebius himself. Moebius draws
like Akira, but the stories arent anywhere near as long as books like Cerebus and Akira.
Im thinking a shorter book formatlike say 45-55 pages would be more suitable for me
and my skill level. Seeing as the average auteur tome is around 50 pages long on average.
I can probably at some point handle a 4 dozen page book. I should probably leave the
really long-winded comics to the Japanese (mostly). I need to take a more realistic look at
where my skills lie right here and now. If I look at my skills realistically, I can barely
even manage a 2-3-pager, let alone a 10 to 4-dozen pager.

P a g e | 36

One of the best ways to define Japanese comics and animation, is its a bit like French
comics on steroids. Theyre longer, often more detailed, and many of the main elements,
like the cinematic element, are amplified.
Pragmatics Discussion
Theory: Experiential Contextualization
History and the passage of time gives contextual and symbolic weight and meaning to
people, places, things, and events as they travel through time and space. When something
is first invented or discovered, it lacks the layered context of meaning. Only by passing
through time does an event, personality, object, and data attain meaning.

My favorite Scorpios:

Ted Turner
Bill Gates
Pablo Picasso

They dominate entire worlds in three of my favorite areas of study: Mass Media, Science,
and Art.

Some writers and artists like to write about their private, personal life in their creative
work and stories. I tend not to do things like that in such a literal way. I got sick of
writing about the subtleties and nuances of my private life in this journal here (socalled Manifesto), which as it turns out everyone reads but no one really cares about or
discusses directly. Based on the feedback Ive gotten regarding my writings about my
life, Ive concluded no one is interested in the reality of that aspect. All other writers care
to do about my life is idealize, slander, or sexualize it, and thats pretty much the end of
it. The true reality of my life is something most people overlook, and because it doesnt
sell when I describe it in my online writings, I pretty much decided to leave my personal
matters out of my most fictional writing a long time ago. The two elements have grown
to become separate living entities. And when someone does attempt to combine the two,
its always done in this very sarcastic, ironic, slapstick, genuinely ruthless and mean
spirited way. All the better reason NOT to include it in my real work. Its a pain.
Take almost any famous animation auteur in Japan. How often do they write fantasy
stories that is nothing more than a tell all version of their life. Tolkien never did that.
George Lucas never did that. Katsuhiro Otomo didnt do that. Why should I be the
exception to the rule? People like fantasy as an escape from the troubles of their reality. If
my creative work became too autobiographical and literal, it would cease to fun to me. I
write my stories to escape from the weariness of my own life just as much as an audience
watches or reads fantasy narratives to escape their own life most of the time. Maybe its

P a g e | 37

the Aspergers syndrome talking, but I have my doubts about that. I dont write fantasy
because I have Aspergers. I have my share of doubts about linking the two.
Parallax explores many things, and some things that havent generally been explored
before. Im doing fantasy, and science fiction in some ways, but its less about science
and medievalism, and more about speculative fiction and portraying God as not just a
mystical, but also a Magical force. God does exist in the world of Parallax, but He-It is a
speculative fiction God, a hybrid mythos God, inspired by the Mythological Gods of
ancient Greece and Rome Mythology. In the same way no one today asks us to accept the
Greek and Roman Gods as fact, I dont ask my audience to accept the God I imagine in
End Times or Parallax as the real world God either. But he is part of the force that creates
the mystical George Lucas-esque spiritual powers that exist in the New-Earth mythos I
created. New Earth is my own vision of my own version of Middle Earth, in a way. There
was no God in Middle Earth, if youre paying attention to the context. But there was
Magical, Mystical Powers in Middle Earth. In Middle Earth and New-Earth, those
elements (magic and power) are quite real.
Speaking of God-Magic. Im going to cite Akira and Lord of the Rings here, as in certain
ways, they have a lot in common. But one of the most striking similarities is through their
thematic implications. Both are technically secular works, and neither makes a literal
reference to a God of any kind. But both explore the responsibilities and ramifications of
power, on both the individual and society. They create a storytelling effect that I call
Power Without God. Both stories and series explore power and the responsibility or
destruction that goes with it, without sourcing that power to God. As a person who often
writes from a secular perspective, and a person who knows power when he sees it, I have
a deep appreciation for this technique. If only more fantasy and SF tried this technique,
wed have a lot less boredom in this world. But the thing about Lord of the Rings and
Akira is, they dont just talk about power. They manifest it into reality. Their worlds
dont just address power thematically and analytically. They make us feel their power.
They discuss power, and they manifest it, AT THE SAME TIME. Thats hard to do. It
isnt an easy effect to achieve. That kind of storytelling power takes a LOT of work.
Hours upon hours and years upon years. Cerebus also achieves this effect, and so does
Blade Runner. Theyre all secular worlds, even when in one instance, Cerebus becomes
Pope, and Dave Sim joined the clergy upon the completion of Cerebus.
In the real world, there are three main sources of truly incredible power: Politics,
Religion, and Money. And last but not least, the route that isnt guaranteed and the one
that takes the most humility: a lot of hard work.
Most of my favorite artists dont live in the same country I do. There are rare exceptions,
but thats typically how it is. I make no apologies for that.

Google
YouTube
Twitter

P a g e | 38

Blogger
Adultswim.com
DeviantART
Goanimetv.com
Manga.com
[various lesser known others]
I didnt realize before, but Im actually pretty well known to the communities of some of
the most popular websites in the world. My fans seem to resent being called fans
though, for some reason.
I do have some favorite sports:
Martial Arts
The Olympics
Baseball
Bowling
Golf
Racing
Boxing
Kickboxing
Mixed Martial Arts

6 Main Elements of My Distinctive and Innovative Style

Black-&-White Notan Noir

Samurai Literature and Cinema
Apocalypse Literature and Film
The SF Fantasy Genre
Martial Arts Action Film
Gun-Fu

Noir-Samurai-Kung-Fu-Sword-Planet-Gun-Apocalypse-Notan Im currently working on

developing a style experimentation in my sketchbooks that integrates all of these
elements into 1 super hybrid element.
To draw fighting in comics, you have to copy fighting in comics, panel by panel, page by
page. You have to study action sequences in various comics, and teach yourself how to
structure your own style of fighting art based on what you see and study and copy,
whether of fists and arms and punches, or feet and legs and kicks, or swords and guns.
(Non-Anime) American Action Cartoons that Influenced Parallax before it was created:

Samurai Jack
Star Wars: Clone Wars (Tartakovsky)

P a g e | 39

Powerpuff Girls
Tarzan
Batman: The Animated Series
Conan the Adventurer
Rankin Bass
Megas XLR
Aeon Flux
Spawn
The Maxx

If its modeled after my own work, and was made after, unless it matches the level Im
going for, chances are it would be unlikely to be an influence.
Thanks in part to myself, Peyos Smurfs (feature film), Herges Tintin (feature film),
Peter Jackson, and Spielberg, 2011 looks to be ending up historically as a watershed year
for Franco-Belgian comics in France, but especially in America. According to the editors
at Animation Magazine, one of my favorite, this is technically just what they said in their
monthly intro column in Animation Magazine in the August 2011 issue. Thats kind of
funny. I didnt realize no one had heard of French comics other than what seems like the
obvious candidate: Scott McCloud.
I was also thinking about another article I read in Animation Magazine, that also inspired
me: Its about using videoconferencing and computer software to communicate with an
animation team remotely (so far primarily for digital animation). Its a relatively new
concept in the animation industry. They call it remote collaboration. Kind of like when
me and Steve Blum produced the Fire Blade voiceover sound effect I wrote for him.
That was an early example of amateur remote collaboration.
So 2 main trends of 2011:
Remote Collaboration
Franco-Belgian Comics
Three countries on the rise in the international original animation community:
France
China
Korea

Video: Portable, transferable, duplicatable, compatible, transient.

So, it seems like technical proficiency in entertainment, high self-confidence, believing
youre going to succeed incredibly before you have a chance to succeed, darkness and
edge, aggressiveness, introspection, weirdness, rebellion, believing your entitled to
success, detail, masculinity isnt considered cool anymore. Turns out that all the things

P a g e | 40

people growing up in the 90s thought was cool, that we all strove for, isnt considered
cool anymore. Being a lame sissy faggot is cool nowadays I guess. Being the opposite of
cool is considered cool in America nowadays. Definitely an American cultural tragedy.
Which ways do people want to read my comics? Do you want to see my comic book
work in Graphic novel format, from Amazon or a bookstore? Or do you just want to see
my art and comics through the internet, on websites?
The so-called key component of capitalism and entrepreneurship is the product.
Without that you have nothing to sell and therefore no way of making money. Capitalism
is not just about founding or running a business. Its really more about having something
to give away to the customers of your market in exchange for money. Probably the most
primitive concept of this theory would be the lemonade stand, with lemonade in a glass
being the product, and the lemonade stand being the means of exchange and trade.
Art and writing have kind of become a side interest. Im supplementing my income in
ways that definitely arent comics or animation. Unless the fields of animation, comics,
manga, and anime become less youthful, crowded, and competitive, theyll probably
remain nothing more than hobbies for a long time to come. There isnt really any kind of
real community for my day job.

Ever wonder why people in animation and anime never disclose their salary information
to the press? Thats simple. Its because, in reality, if were being honest with ourselves,
financially speaking, people on TV arent making all that much money than you or I am
for the most part. If someone makes a lot of money, often, we will hear about it if its an
obscenely high figure. I am indeed a pretty good failure when it comes to animation and
comics or anime and manga. But then again, look at the market. Everyone is looking
like a loser who is involved in comics and animation, not just me. I dont see much of a
reason to get up in arms when all the other fans and many professionals are failing just as
much. And they are.
No matter who it involves or what I do, with my time or for work, I always know what
the final result will be, and can visualize said outcome perfectly. I always know what the
final future result will be to any action I take. Thats why I didnt sue YouTube. Or
DeviantART. I know its tricky legal territory proving what you really did, and I knew no
matter what I did, Id lose, so I eventually gave up on pursuing those websites through
litigation for stealing my credit from me. $30-$50 million in damages sounds about right.
On the subject of money, Im glad Ive abandoned what I like to refer as The quality
anime profit delusion out of my system. Being technically proficient doesnt actually
earn money in the bigger market. And Im saying this as one of the worlds biggest fans
of technical proficiency.

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Esprit De Corps: Team Building

The T-Word
I work with teams online all the time, but unfortunately, Im not very good at being the
whole Official Team Leader thing. Not when it comes to people giving up of their free
time on entertainment websites anyway. Back in the day, Brian undermined a LOT of
the teamwork I created, almost single-handedly. We must be united in obliterating Jays
team building and team spirit so you can stop him from achieving anything of
significance. Yeah, good luck with that.
I used to not be into teamwork. Though I do write about group dynamics in my fictional
stories, I guess I never thought it could apply to my life. I used to think teamwork was
only for fictional governments and Japanese animation and/or business staffs, but its
actually a bit more universal than that. If theres one thing America lacks lately or has
always lacked that Japan has in spades if you compare the two nations, Japan has
teamwork. Its a team based society and culture. Its collective self-awareness is just that:
Collective.
Ive been trying to find and hire members of my animation staff for a long time now.
Years in fact. But finding people to work with you on ambitious project, who are
professional and know how to do their job without screwing everything up for everyone
else on your team is harder than it looks. Okay, its just as difficult as it looks actually.
Theres a huge shortage of team players on almost any site thats not YouTube.
Im actually a pretty big believer and practitioner of team spirit. Any real leader of
various kinds of teams needs to practice and be successful at generating Team Spirit,
Morale, Esprit de Corps. Any good leader knows how to keep most if not all of the
people working with him happy. Im generally not happy unless most of the people
working with me are happy in some way. Plenty of famous leaders in entertainment and
media are no different. Good leaders are always generous and compassionate. There
needs to be a compassionate balance there between various team members, or crew
members, or employees, or staff, or whatever name the people youre working with go
by.
I do quite enjoy playing the engineer and designer role of whatever group Im in at the
moment.
My first two books of journals were primarily an artists and writers journal series. Kind
of boring.
I do always fall for the creative types of female. But Im terrible at communicating
directly with people. I really shouldnt write about my relationship status. Im no good at
that sort of thing, not surprisingly. My relationship with ladies was probably healthiest in
art school, but that was a long time ago. Its ancient history. There isnt a colorful art
school community in my life like there was. Its different now. Plus, the consequences of

P a g e | 42

being in a relationship are grave, seeing as my love life is one of the most overanalyzed
areas of my entire career and life.

OK, new daily exercise. Instead of continuing to write Manifesto, which no one really
reads, Im refocusing my Morning Pages on a different arena: Fiction.
Im going to make myself write to 1 page of fiction writing a day, with either CeltX
and/or Microsoft Word software. 1 page, dailyA page a day (of fiction for 10 years)
shouldnt be that hard. I can see this working.
When you calculate it and add it up, 10 years of daily pages, writing 1 or page of short
form short story (limited narrative) literature would add up to around 3,000 pages or so,
give or take a few hundred. Sweet.
So essentially, on average, Im making the effort to do a fiction write up on an idea a day.
1 idea per day, typicallyI really cant see that being too hard. Ill write these pages
between 2011 & 2020.
I can feel peoples dislike of me, my own lack of charisma, weakening me and my
creative spirit somehow. Opposition when its this strong does result in a feeling of
overwhelming fatigue. Resistance Fatigue.

Monday, August 29, 2011

Daily Quota for Creativity

Overcome Procrastination and Creative Blockage of Resistance-Fatigue: Inertia.

Write 1 page of Fiction a Day, Every Day, Yearly, until 2020
Draw 1 2 panel sequential art page almost every day, until 2020

Total Amount of Work completed today?

1 sequential art page
1 page of fiction
Mission Accomplished.

Ive done a very good job of not listening to just about anybody today.

Wow, I saw a photo of indie comics artist Faith Erin Hicks on Tumblr. Shes cute as hell.
I dont know why I always tend to go for artist type girls, in terms of who I wish was my
girlfriend. Not saying I know her that well, but I kind of wish I did, if Im being honest. I
really like her hair, very punk rock in a way.

P a g e | 43

I think a sketchbook is kind of meant not just for using every once in a while to make
stuff up, but instead to be held with you everywhere you go, recording as many
observations from life and publishing and TV/video/internet galleries as possible.

I may be new to the literary market, at least in the sense of people knowing who I am,
but Im on my way to becoming one of the most influential nonfiction and fantasy writers
there is, anywhere in the world. People paraphrase and re-enact things Ive said, done,
and written numerous times a day. I see it all the time. And I dont even have anything
published outside of the internet community yet. But yes, I am quite the popular and
influential young writer. But I try to make time for drawing, animation, comics, and other
such things whenever possible.
My brother Andrews wife is due for a second child, a post-Anthony child. The gender
has not yet been established, but in a way, Im still happy for him. Andrews got a lot of
stuff on his plate lately. Dad often acts very angry at him for not being able to get a
consistent job, but Im not angry at Andrew like I used to be. Now that hes moved out,
maybe permanently, Ive had some time to forgive him and his anger issues. But still,
being pregnant with a second child is a pretty big deal. Anthony is turning 7 this year
(2011) on the same month as me: November.
I think the guy on Twitter was right. Maybe the reason so many of my comic book pages
look amateurish is because Im not working hard enough. I work hard enough at writing,
but not art. Good thing Im buying more sketchbooks.
Some girl artist on DeviantART drew me as a scientific Rudy Colby / Aquabats and
Devo type humorous character, where I say Lets make medicine and Im in her
thought bubble and shes thinking So cool!. She titled it Fangirlin or some such
thing. Pretty funny. Thats one of the most memorable and funny fanarts Ive seen in a
while!

Im finally beginning to develop the development plan and blueprints for my Oliver-E
comic series. Initially I just wanted to make it a childrens animated series in the tradition
of Harry Potter, but with storyboard like production design and comic book panels, I
might be able to make it so much more. Theres a couple main elements Im planning on
putting in Olivers world.

Oliver-E: Quantum Sorcerer Wiki:

Quantum-E (short for quanta energy). Its the source of technology and magic in
Olivers world, and is a multi-purpose energy source, generated through crystals

P a g e | 44

capsules, that are pulled from the earth and nature by scientists, mostly in laboratories,
but also through mystical spellbooks that can generate and channel this energy.
Dark Energy. Another form of Energy in the world of Oliver E. But it fuels raw power
and evil, and turns people down the wrong path, one of evil and amorality.
Oliver: The protagonist. Hes a mad-scientist sorcerer (wizard) in training at a research
laboratory and studies under a famous Quanta Expert and Professor at a leading research
laboratory and University, even though Oliver is only 14 years old. He also pilots his own
giant robot which fights monsters and creatures of the Dark, that run on Dark Energy
Professor Dunson Applegate Rutherford, Ph.D.: Olivers adult mentor and father-like
figure. Oliver is an orphan, and Dunson Rutherford serves as surrogate father figure and
mentor to young Oliver. Hes also a leading academic and scholar on mechanics and
quantum energy, or quanta.
H.U.I. (Short for: Human User Interface): The energy source, spellbook energy,
specialized quanta energy, User Interface, and Dashboard, as well as a reincarnated soul
of a Mythological God that powers Olivers Giant Mechanical Robot, or Mecha except
it has a talking voice, and can talk back to Oliver as he sits in the pilot seat.
SIN: The Dark Lord: Evil Mastermind of this fantasy world, serving as a type of
Sauron-like figure (lord of the rings)

So Im making room in my schedule to remember tothe Saturday after this coming one
at Midnightwrite the September 11th, 2011 Retrospective: Reflections on a Monstrous
Tragedy. That should hopefully go over well.
I know their secret! I know their secret now! I know the ingeniously well hidden artistic
secrets of Corey Senderov Jackson, Todd McFarlane, Moebius, Yasuhirow Nightow, Joe
Mad, and Katsuhiro Otomo! Tracing paper is the secret. Ill bet they all use tracing paper,
or at the very least tracing paper would make their job a lot easier. You can layer tracing
paper over a detailed drawing, and draw another detailed drawing over it, then trace the
foreground onto the background, and BOOM, youve got a hyper detailed anime cell.
Thats what I did with Oliver E in his H.U.I. mecha dashboard seat today. It looked
amazing. I call it layering. Corey originally recommended the act of using tracing paper
too me, but I didnt think too much of it. Now I want all my detailed drawings to use it.
Its the perfect technique. It creates exactly what Im going for.

Im trying a new technique to build my model sheets, mecha components, and

technological parts in my sketchbooks. Its starts off with the artful tracing, tracing paper
layering technique, where I draw different components or parts of machines on a page
using tracing paper to detail in different sections. Im going to assemble the machines in

P a g e | 45

my sketchbooks the way one builds robot model kits in real life: By building it, section
by section by tracing over each section with pencils, pens, rulers, tracing paper, and
scanners, to assemble full page line and detail heavy compositions. I re-invented the
sword in animation. Now Im going to re-assemble mecha design construction.

P a g e | 46

Chapter 43

P a g e | 47

Saturday, September 03, 2011,

Well, I think that decade-long practice of drawing nothing but MonoBlade was a
good enough WARM UP! Im pretty sure Im ready to dive into storyboards. I already
started storyboarding Oliver, I figured why not start storyboarding Mono too. Even if it is
digitally edited and manipulated, its still better than nothing, and that is how I did my
best two pages, by cutting and pasting pre-existing work.
When every line being put on the page and its drawing is of significance in terms of
mindfulness used to apply it, suddenly a larger amount of the drawing looks aesthetically
good.
Now I can draw real anime, and real manga: My first reaction to that? So what, Ive
still got a lot more work to do before I get finished. Im also going back to digitally
edited comic book pages. But really, me saying so what is just a form of accepting that
Ive reached an enviable level of draftsmanship, one I previously only dreamed of
reaching.
From now on Im going for shitty, mediocre, and weak comic book pages, not
perfect ones. If I lower the standard I wont get so caught up in being good
enough. That way Ill force myself to draw actual pages, instead of just calculating
the odds and preparing for practice.
Theres no such thing as too much detail or too much layering. Never stop increasing
a pages detail. Keep tracing over with new coatings with each passing day, with artful
tracing on tracing paper.
No matter what I write I always get a response from an anonymous person. Sometime,
somewhere, the response never stops. It always happens if I reply or someone replies to
me.
On a technical level, Im one of the best artists and writers working in animation and
comics today. Now that Ive actually somehow managed to rival the quality in my
sketchbooks and art of many of the technical and historical bests, and now that Im one of
the best there is, I guess I just keep focusing on getting better regardless of whether or not
Im superior or at the top of the quality, design, and draftsmanship hierarchy. Being at the
top is nice, but I want to stay at the top, and keep improving. Once you reach the top, you
can only really go upward by topping yourself, because technically youre already up
there with the best of them. Youre one of the best.
Things that wont ever happen to me, that at one point I always wanted:

I wont ever get my own cartoon show.

I wont ever get my own manga book or graphic novel.
I wont ever be popular and not hated.
I wont win any of my lawsuits Im filing.

P a g e | 48

I wont ever finish writing a script or fiction novel.

I wont ever get truly famous
I wont ever be truly powerful.
I wont be rich.
I wont have any demand for my product

I just noticed something. No one I know has any of these things either.

No one I know has a cartoon show, a comic book series, good will, a lawsuit, a
novel or script, fame, power, or money either, just like me. Some have a little bit
of money, but thats about it. They dont have any real power or fame. And none
of them seem to mind either. I dont have very powerful connections. Im at the
mercy of the TV and media, because I dont have any real power.
I dont have any bragging rights. That really sucks.
Im not going to succeed in music
Im not going to succeed in literature
Im not going to succeed in TV
Im not going to succeed in film
Im not going to succeed online
Im not going to succeed in comics
Im not going to succeed in animation

Wow, I really need to get a life. Not having any of these things isnt the end of the world.
I did contribute things to the medium. But not one ever chose to repay or credit me for
those contributions
Well Im not going to be homeless, have a heart attack, or commit suicide just because I
wont live to reach any of these goals. Im nothing.

Things Akira Contributed to Animation and Comics / and also Anime and Manga:

Detail
Perspective
Mechanical Design
Debris Effects
Animation Layering
Storyboarding
Production Design
Collapse City
Architecture
Cyberpunk
SF
Dome of Light Explosions
Beacons of Light

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Angst
Violence
Architectural Multiplaning

Misguided Misdirection:
Ive definitely lost sight of my initial goal, and that would be creating a series bible,
comic book, script, or novel that I can sell to a studio. No amount of success or goodwill
will come my way unless I finish something.

Science:
In a way, being a scientist is the ultimate stay-at-home job outside of being a comic book
artist or running a home based comics and animation studio.

You mean I have to admit Im insane like the doctors want to prove just so I can get
paid disabilities by the health care social security office, other wise theyll refuse to
send me paycheck if I dont admit Im crazy and mentally ill? But Im NOT mentally
ill. And Im not disabled. I just say that so I dont have to work and can get a paycheck.
Take the easy way out and all that. My parents even encourage this kind of social and
financial shortcut. Social Security, Psychiatry, Medical Doctors, and Health Care are so
messed up.

Its kind of weird being in my position. I could publish the entire manuscripts of the Lord
of the Rings Trilogy and War and Peace of this generation, and even then, even after all
that work all anyone would want to do would be to dissect my face. Its the Face Curse.
No one cares about anything you do, even when its the most historic thing in the world.
All they want to do is look at your face. Kind of creepy. OK, very creepy and disturbing.
How much people dont have a clue. Thats fucking creepy.
Im a steamroller, a freight train, a force of nature, an unstoppable force, a magnum opus,
a tour de force, a one man army. Whatever the word for a progressive and forward
moving power is that leads civilization into the far distant future, whatever that It Factor
of Power is, I have it. So naturally, this energy and force is hard to hide from anyone
really, let alone my family, neighbors, the media, and public. Naturally, many strong will
individuals have attempted to intercept me on my so-called mission and cause me to
fail, cause the train to be derailed. Theyve all found it to be an impossible task, even the
most powerful, evil, and aggressive of them. My power, energy, and force, due to its
ubiquitous and endless nature, are always bigger, badder, and more tireless than them. In
a way this force protects me, stop harm from befalling me the vast majority of the time.
Its like some higher power, God perhaps, sees this kinetic force Im generating, this
godlike power, and decides to let me continue in my pursuits, regardless of what critics,

P a g e | 50

detractors, rivals, competitors, enemies, and the world think. This is because the force
that surrounds me is not entirely 100% about just me or my face or glasses or libido or
hair or name or any other distinguishing characteristic. If it was just about me, I could hit
the brakes, but because it goes deeper than that, there is no way to stop it. Or me. And
honestly, I dont know if this unstoppable force is God stepping in to protect me and
make me divine and noble in some way or another. If I knew for certain it was God, or at
the very least karma and the energy of the universe paying me back with power, at least
Id be able to put actual real faith in it and not worry so much, but it can create so much
chaos sometimes, it can be hard to have faith in something so destructive and chaotic. I
know what real power is, but I dont know if that power is God or the Universe. Maybe I
should have faith in The Force. So. The Force (Star Wars) is real. I should Wiki it. The
Force is Power, Divine Intervention.

Divine intervention is your number one enemy getting arrested and put in jail, for being a
murder and general sociopath that wanted to kill you more than anyone.
Divine intervention is when the most powerful person in anime writes a book about your
adventures.
Divine intervention is when your 17 years old you take a test that declares youll have a
lot of money when you grow up. And almost as what seems like a follow up to that first
miracle, you speak to a lawyer on the phone who tells you that you could in fact
potentially earn $100,000,000,000.00 from your line of work.

(Cable) Television As Cinema:

TV is gradually becoming more cinematic. The French and Japanese auteurs were the
first ones to make animation more cinematic after Disneys post-90s fall from grace for
the most part, with Akira and Ghost in the Shell. More attention to detail. Darker
Lighting. Better voice acting. More ambitious storytelling. More drama and mythology
and action. Better choreography. These are the kind of things my school of what Ill refer
to as TV-filmmaking emphasizes.

How to Draw Automatically:

I do other things. I just forget about drawing for a while
-Famous Asian Artist

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Thats the key, the secret. The reason I talk endlessly and write endlessly about drawing,
but never actually draw most of the time (other than the weights of the images in my head
causing me fatigue) is because Im thinking too much. Im thinking about it too much. I
dont think about writing too much. I forget about writing a lot, and that way my mind is
a blank slate, ready to be filled up by the manifestation of words and thoughts and
concepts written on pages. If I really want to trick myself into working harder, I need to
not think about it for a long time, at all if possible, and just deal with it as I hit the page
each day until it comes automatically from copying and layering with artful tracing, kind
of like writing in a way. I dont talk or write about writing. I just write. And I need to not
talk or write about drawing, I need to just draw, never think about it before hand or ahead
of time. Thinking about the task too much before I do it is a safety hazard to my right
brained artistic process. This is how I draw. I dont think about it. That way my
subconscious feels the void of no art, and it is automatically drawn to the act of drawing,
and not the act of talking or writing about drawing. I know art excites me and my visual
brain and imagination, but it becomes useless if I cant successfully manifest artwork and
imagery and illustrations on the page. Less talk. Less Thinking. Less Writing about
drawing, and MORE ACTION! Non-premeditated Action is the solution to
procrastination.
Im declaring an end to the Great Era of Gesture Drawing Cartoons and Doodles. Those
were some of my worst drawings ever. From now on Im going to do my best to put
effort behind every line, no matter what kind of line it is. Every line needs delicate care.
The reason for this is: For me: Gesture Drawing = Bad Drawing. Construction lines are
not the same thing as gesture drawing lines. Gesture = sinful, unforgivable squiggle thats
ruining my artwork. Gesture drawing gives birth to so many bad botched abortions of
attempts at drawings, I dont see scribbling and squiggling about like that as helping me
in anyway. It reflects poorly on me. Now is the time for clean lines and defined/refined
forms.
Im building an industry and a medium and genre. A form largely without comparison
anywhere in the world
Hmmm. Prolificacy is relative I suppose. Osamu drew the most pages, but not the longest
series. Tezukas longest running series was Phoenix, which spanned 12 volumes at 350
pages each, which equals around 4,200 pages. And Osamu Tezuka drew between 150,000
and 180,000 pages of comics. Dave Sims longest running series is shorter than Tezukas
longest running series, but Dave Sim put all his energy into one series mostly, Osamu
Tezuka spread his energy out into more diversity in the form of dozens of series of great
variety. So whos more prolific? Both.
So in the last 10 years, from 20012011, Ive cranked out 4,200 pages of art-writing
literature.
Bad Habits (Art Mistakes / Accidents):

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Gesture Squiggles. Crappy drawings without thought.

Not thinking about my lines when Im drawing
Putting the sketchbook down permanently when Im not working
Thinking of drawing when Im not drawing

Tuesday, September 06, 2011,

The media and professional hazard of valuing product above process
The mainstream media and press essentially pretend your not alive and you dont exist
unless you do an officially and measurably professional publishable work, even if your
name is in Google search engines like 40 times like mine is. Thats just how the media
and press function. They ignore and discourage you from succeeding and treat you like
nonexistent worthless shitUNTIL you sell a project. So I guess I still got a while to go.

Narrating a narrative is considerably easier than narrating sequential art with images,
forms, pictures, and artwork. With a word you just write the word, with art you have to
actually have pre-established knowledge about how to draw a certain prop, form,
character, or object, in that positions, and you have to have drawn it dozens if not
hundreds or thousands of times before the polished attempt. Most comics artists only
draw the things they know how to draw and/or like to draw all the time, like anatomy,
drapery and cloth, vehicles, weapons, fighting, street scenes, bushes, trees, roads,
buildings, mountains, the sky, or architecture. And many more, like sci-fi mecha, or
debris, nature and weather, and power effects.

Its nice having the superpower of digital video portability and ubiquity at my disposal.
The adult market isnt just a mature market. It represents not just a more
multidimensional, deeper, wise, and sophisticated market. It is also a more intelligent
market. A market for intelligent audiences. Not just teenage girls, high school boys,
college kids, and kids in diapers.
Thats one of the main differences between my target demographic and say, that of Viz or
Shonen Jump. Shonen translates to boy, ironically enough.
Even though there isnt much, if any, sex there, I write stories primarily about adults. The
adult world of grownups. Sophisticated, smart, strong, and powerful people. Adults.
So Im taking a somewhat Scarface and Al Pacino style take on Mono currently. Say
hello to my LITTLE FRIEND!!! BLAM!!! That sort of thing, except now Im writing it
in comics script format, as a cartoonist sort of?

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I probably dont need to make up new story worlds and non-Mono situations now. I can
probably just focus on telling stories with Mono.
Im also going to work on fanfiction literature of my favorite wuxia, Hong Kong kung fu
movies, comics, anime, animation, and digital videos. Anything thats narrated whether
visually or linguistically, I will transfer to words on the page.
Animation isnt magic. It doesnt just appear out of nowhere. A script featuring the
narrative, characters, structure, and story must be written. Every prop, character, costume,
and background layout must be written down, designed, modeled with model sheets,
integrated into the episode, and meticulously drawn. So before I draw in panels for a
comic book issue, I must write and design any, every, and all props that appear on each
panel in each issue, which is something (prop listing, prop integration) I havent done
until now.
If the comic book industry was just about drawing comics and nothing else, Id have a
much easier go of it. But unfortunately, the industrys become a bit complex lately.
Theres a lot of online-screen politics involved.
I wonder if women just want me for my [future] money and [future] wealth. Who knows?
Some girls wonder why Im never in a relationship, including now and in the last ten
years. Its not as complex as I once thought it was. I dont despise having a relationship
with a girlfriend anymore. Im afraid of relationships, partially because Im not good at
commitment, and partially because Ive never been in a real relationship before. There
was Heather, who I made out with because she thought I looked cool as a football player
in junior high, and there was Nicole, and a few other girls who I talked to a lot, but never
really did much more than flirt with. Ive never been in a regular relationship, with dates
and sex and whatnot. I have no relationship experience.
I must grow a beard. My literary status depends on it!
Honestly? I want to start off as a cartoonist and manga-ka, much like Walt Disney &
Tezuka did, and eventually branch off into animation, perhaps by selling something to a
studio for development. Maybe using the money I make in the next ten years to move to
Los Angeles and fund my own animation, comics, or media studio, which produces
anime-esque animation, for DVD perhaps, or maybe for cable television. Im ready to slit
throats people! Lets do this thing! That is one thing I could do with my money: Fund a
venture. Im more of a Producer or Executive Producer and Screenwriter than I am an
Animation Director. I dont know how to direct animators.
Some of the greatest, most creative work Ive ever had came out of the poorest, most
difficult, and most struggling times of my life.
Its nice having projects to work on, with some of them being very cutting edge.

P a g e | 54

Im really starting to successfully live up to my numerology sub-title: The Master

Builder.
I love the works of early pioneers in numerous mediums in the early 18-1900s. Im just in
love with the idea of one guy doing simple and incredibly early and innovative
experiments in a pioneering field, and decades, years, or generations later theyve ended
up creating or inventing the field someone, some later generation genius, creates the most
complex project in the world in. In other words, Im in love with the idea of creating
early pioneering work in a field that leads to eventual hyper-detailed, hyper-complex
work that the medium evolves into later on, in a sort of hyper-progressive evolution.
Saturday, September 10, 2011,
5 or so hours to go until September 11th, 2011.
Sunday, September 11, 2011,
You know, in some ways, some very integral ways, Parallax, in a way wasand still
isan anti-terrorism/terrorist allegory. The Fallen Organization or the Four Horseman
Group is very much an allegorical portrayal of terrorists who practice terrorism, as
symbolized in literary form as demons, while portraying the fight against them. I dont
like terrorism. At all. I dont like how terrorism has turned society against itself, just as
the Nazis did, and just like The Devil would want, if Satan was real. Mono is Jack Ryan
in a post 9-11 Fantasy World (New-Earth). And the War against The Fallen was
something inspired by watching the news in a post 9-11 world, with all the media
coverage of the war in the Middle East.
I dont normally speak or write publicly on the subject of 9-11, or the War on Terror,
because of how personally I felt my life has been affected by 9-11, and how much it
screwed up my life and how much I blame terrorism for that, but I decided to make an
exception and do some non-fiction writing on the subject of 9-11, published exclusively
online, in my current blog

It is a celebration of real heroes today. Id feel a little selfish bragging about myself and
my own abilities and accomplishments on a day like today.
Since today seems to be primarily a day of reflection on past events, maybe Ill write on
some of those. Like 2002, the year after 2001: That was right during the time I graduated
high school and briefly attended an art school in south Florida for about a month or
two. Thats right, I was enlisted in the Media Arts & Animation program at the Art
Institute of Fort Lauderdale (AiFL), working towards a Bachelor of Science degree,
where I lived in Sunrise Hall Apartments in Fort Lauderdale for a month or two studying
animation in college or actual art school. It was amazing how optimistic I was about my
life and future at the time. At the time I was very, very optimistic, and primarily just

P a g e | 55

excited and happy to finally be out of primary school. I actually did attain a certain
amount of popularity with the students and faculty at the Art Institute in Ft. Lauderdale,
before I was pulled out by my parents, never to graduate. Art school at the time made me
actually feel like I had a life. It was one of the best most comforting feelings I had ever
had, even though my family was convinced I was losing my mind, and hospitalized me in
a psychiatric hospital for nervous breakdown as soon as my parents pulled me out of
school. I didnt even make it home. My parents drove me directly from my room in
Sunrise Hall to a room in a local psych ward. They were convinced I was some kind of
total failure at accomplishing my goals. They wanted me to admit failure, and that caused
a lot of arguments between me and my parents.
I pretty much am abandoning my main projects in favor of trying newer things. The old
way of doing things just doesnt work. It just isnt working. I dont discuss other things
though. Far as my writing goes though, Im still discussing outdated work towards an
outdated ambition. There were too many factors and people conspiring against me for me
to ever really succeed all by myself in a field like that. As long as I stand alone in the art
world, Ill never succeed in the mainstream. The only people who do that are the ones
who are assisted by others in numerous ways. This is how I prefer it. Not announcing and
advertising my every move and comment to the entire fucking world. Not feeding the
stupid masses with false information. Abandoning all of that and just quietly going about
my daily business. I have no desire to speak out, whether its retaliatory or otherwise.
Thats a waste of time. I like re-affirming my position and pretending to be as stupid as
my rivals also like to pretend I am. False stupidity is a wonderful way to fool those who
conspire.
Essay:
Secularizing the Arab World, Through Science, A Starting Point.
Im part Arab. Im American. Im Arab-American (partially). And Im mostly scientific
and secular. Im a secular Arab. Islam is bullshit. I may be the first of my kind, I may be
the only one in the world, but I have trouble accepting this idea as a reality, that Arab
religion and society are inseparable. Thats a self-perpetuating bullshit religious
stereotype that has no place in the mostly ignorant, hateful, and unscientific Arab world
in the Middle East. All the wars in the Middle East are caused by belief in a traditional
higher power, by Jesus and God and Allah. In the Middle East, those guys are war
mongers, because of how badly the Arab world has corrupted religion. I believe in
secularizing the Arab world, or at the very least, de-homogenizing it. This notion that
Arabs Have to be Muslim if youre Arab is racist bullshit. So very racist and onedimensional. Racial categorization does not equal a certain religion. Or at the very least it
shouldnt. Especially not in America or the Middle East. Its not self-hatred because Im
not hating on secular Arab culture, but the Middle East would be a lot better and less
violent if it didnt have religion to begin with. Im a strong believer in this theory. The
Secular Arab World. Arab cultures only religion has perverted the notion of a what
exactly a higher power is for a long time now.

P a g e | 56

As one can deduce by studying history, the Secularization of the West and Southeast
Asia, which has already happened is not an evil thing. Its made the world more
comfortable, if nothing else. Science doesnt kill religion. Or deprive us of God. Just
because there is a separation of Church and State in the Modern Western World does not
mean religion or spirituality will disappear.
Some of the smartest people in scientific history, from Freud to Einstein to H.G. Wells
were not just critical of deities and religion, but were also strongly supportive of pacifism
and strongly opposed to war, regardless of how different the dominant culture was at the
time. I am no different, in regards to 9-11 and the War on Terror and fundamentalism in
Eastern and Western Religion. There needs to be a separation of mosque and state just as
there was a separation of Church and State in the United States and the West. The only
way to increase the probability of peace and end war is to integrate all viewpoints and
cultures. The Internet is helping with this a lot. Its erasing boarders, and contexts.
Ive produced many products, none of which Ive managed to sell or exchange for money
with anyone. Thats really not one of my talents. Selling my own work is not a talent of
mine, not for my art anyway.
Where will I be in 2021? Where will I be at the age of 37?
Things to be edited out of my journal entry manuscripts: Manifesto and Commentary,
upon my death if I am unable to edit my own work.
Hire a professional editor to consult with an archivist to consult with my parents and
Chris Hess.
Edit out the following:

Rants with a lot of curse words

Why exactly do you keep calling me a commie pervert Red Scare Sequel style
rants
Rants about Andrew and Jinnel, my brother and sister in law. They dont deserve
that.
Sexual diatribes about my made up sex life, which never actually existed
Anything that might be considered insensitive to race or culture (Japan, Asia)
Homophobic slurs
Namedrops, real names, and shoutouts for people, places, or things, other than
pure pop culture and entertainment
Rants are not the same thing as critiques

Im gonna pull a Mark Twain here.

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My mother agreed. My beard is getting bushier, its grown longer, just like I suspected
upon looking at my face in the mirror. If you ask me, my face is starting to look older;
More Mature. Aged. Full Grown. Old.
I dont talk about Nick Weidenfeld of Adult Swim fame and power much, but hes got
one awesome beard. I want a beard like his when Im aged, even though he is right
around my age. So young, so successful, such an empire. I love Nick Weidenfelds work!
I love how he manages Adult Swim through good and bad. Through calm times and
turbulence.
There are some distinguishing elements of my portrait: Black hair. Curly rats nest. Afro
like hair structure. Square rectangular thin-rimmed glasses. Brown pupils. Bill Cosby
Nose. Black slightly bushy facial hair (beard, mustache), tan Mongolian skin, freckles
scattered across my face. Black cotton tee shirt. Heavy set structure in certain ways.
Either khaki capris or bluejeans (pants). Im one of a kind. The facial hair on my face
fascinates me. What exactly does it meanculturally, historically, and nowadaysto
have a thick dark beard. Im like Ted Turner, or Albert Einstein. Ive got a distinguishing
face. I like looking at my face in the mirror. Its got some wear and tear. If anyone were
to understand the whole look alike face rip off thing, Weidenfeld would. Theres all
sorts of guys on TV that sort of look like him. I seriously doubt he can always control
something like that, just like I cant.
Hmm. China, Illinois. Looks interesting. Commercial was pretty amazing. I was even
tempted to record that one on DVD, rip it, and upload it to YouTube. I wont though.
Havent uploaded in a while. But I digress.
I know a thing or two about my ambitions, yes. Honestly, I dont care about winning the
Nobel or Pulitzer Prize. I dont care about winning awards. I dont care about TIME,
Entertainment Weekly, or Rolling Stone magazines. All I care about getting a feature in
is one magazine, years from now if and when I have a show: Animation Magazine.
Animation Magazine is one of my three favorite magazines of all time, getting
recognized in a trade magazine, such as Animation Magazine is the highest honor.
Because thats the one magazine all my peers read, and the fans dont, therefore its
pretty much all I care about. I end up in a write up there, my life is complete.
Im pretty good at building my own cars. Its my secret weapon. My ONLY secret
weapon. Finally Ill be able to drive down south into South Florida. On my own!
Yeeyuh!
Yeah, Ive got my share of secrets. Like the car Im in the process of constructing in my
garage, from various car parts. It takes a solid knowledge of mechanical science and
engineering. It also takes an engine, a dashboard, breaks, and various other structural
components. Kind of makes me feel like Frankenstein, but with automobile construction
and building. Its quite physically exhausting. But the reward of this process speaks for
itself.

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Im going to do a lot better artistically. Ive begun to debunk my motivation to publish on

the web
Im not really allowing myself to write much, if any, journals. Those things are well
written as shit, but theyre headed in the wrong direction, to a hideous explosion.
Joe Alberts is one of the most endearing stars in America. Now its my turn to turn him
into the worlds biggest asshole, on TV! I shall criticize and mock his name and physical
appearance! This action will make people think better of me than him.
Comics are in fact just what Ive noticed as Ive created them. Each panel and page is a
lot of hard work over a long period of time. If comics are made quickly, it will show.
Slow, tedious, and painfully laborious work is the only way to go. Comics are suffering.
Art is suffering. It takes suffering to create good art. If you draw, you will suffer
and feel pain, if youre any good.
Now thats the kind of positive re-enforcement I like to hear. And because Im a master
builder 22, if I write it a million times, then that means it will be reality a million times
over. Hurray!!!!
Im one of the best artists in the world, according to the media.
Im one of the best artists in the world, according to the media.
Im one of the best artists in the world, according to the media.
Im one of the best artists in the world, according to the media.
Im one of the best artists in the world, according to the media.
Im one of the best artists in the world, according to the media.
Im one of the best artists in the world, according to the media.
Im one of the best artists in the world, according to the media.
Im one of the best artists in the world, according to the media.
Im one of the best artists in the world, according to the media.
Im one of the best artists in the world, according to the media.
Im one of the best artists in the world, according to the media.
Im one of the best artists in the world, according to the media.
Im one of the best artists in the world, according to the media.
Im one of the best artists in the world, according to the media.
Im one of the best artists in the world, according to the media.
Yay! The make it real by writing about it game is awesome. Ive got an obvious unfair
advantage. Not that that bothers me.
No one or thing will ever stop me from drawing a lot all day every day.
No one or thing will ever stop me from drawing a lot all day every day.
No one or thing will ever stop me from drawing a lot all day every day.
No one or thing will ever stop me from drawing a lot all day every day.
No one or thing will ever stop me from drawing a lot all day every day.

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No one or thing will ever stop me from drawing a lot all day every day.
No one or thing will ever stop me from drawing a lot all day every day.
No one or thing will ever stop me from drawing a lot all day every day.
No one or thing will ever stop me from drawing a lot all day every day.
No one or thing will ever stop me from drawing a lot all day every day.
I will show my drawings to no one.
I will show my drawings to no one.
I will show my drawings to no one.
I will show my drawings to no one.
I will show my drawings to no one.
I will show my drawings to no one.
I will show my drawings to no one.
I will show my drawings to no one.
Im going to finish drawing a comic book panel soon within the next few minutes.
Im going to finish drawing a comic book panel soon within the next few minutes.
Im going to finish drawing a comic book panel soon within the next few minutes.
Im going to finish drawing a comic book panel soon within the next few minutes.
Im going to finish drawing a comic book panel soon within the next few minutes.
Im going to finish drawing a comic book panel soon within the next few minutes.
Im going to finish drawing a comic book panel soon within the next few minutes.
Im going to finish drawing a comic book panel soon within the next few minutes.
Im going to finish drawing a comic book panel soon within the next few minutes.
Im going to finish drawing a comic book panel soon within the next few minutes.
Im going to finish drawing a comic book panel soon within the next few minutes.
Im going to finish drawing a comic book panel soon within the next few minutes.
Ill never experience comic book panel artists block ever again. No more
procrastination.
Ill never experience comic book panel artists block ever again. No more procrastination.
Ill never experience comic book panel artists block ever again. No more procrastination.
Ill never experience comic book panel artists block ever again. No more procrastination.
Ill never experience comic book panel artists block ever again. No more procrastination.
Ill never experience comic book panel artists block ever again. No more procrastination.
Subliminal Messages Rock. Thanks for teaching me something marketing world.
About drawing comic book props:
The page is small. Almost all props that are smaller than the characters look tiny in
comics. Comic book pages are small, and therefore have less space, and therefore, as a
result, all props look tiny, like miniatures. Everything looks smaller in comics.

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How to draw a sword fight sequence/scene:

Watch lots of movies, TV shows, How-To-Draw Samurai and Fighting books,

and anime/manga/comics with sword fighting. Copy from source material
like crazy.

Study real swords. Shinai arent that expensive. Same with light saber toys.
Anything saber-like will do.

Study yourself in the mirror holding swords or sword like objects, get the
anatomy of a sword wielder. Study it.

Draw thumbnails, both copied and original of sword fight sequence camera
compositions. Establish poses, anatomy, perspective, length (of swords and
fighters).

Polish thumbnails into comic book storyboard panels

Clean up weak panels/compositions. Cut and past and shrink/enlarge

proportions

Ink finished panels and then pages of comics storyboards

Think like a choreographer. Also, make sure the blades you draw are not too wide
or short.

Think in terms of narrative story and storytelling, and the characters motivation
and psychology

Quitting time for drawing is 9:00 p.m. From 9 p.m. - 2 a.m. I spend time watching TV,
relaxing, and falling asleep.
Necessary Elements to have for success in comics: Hard work, persistent starting,
momentum, obsession, will-power, discipline, persistence, daily repetition, research,
perseverance, energy, tirelessness, suffering, courage, strength, Vision, Humility.
Hey, I got an idea. Maybe I could be a part-time video game designer-writer, Yasuhiro
Nightow style!

Finally Im actually starting to incorporate some detail into my (comics and sequential
art) pages. Ive discovered how I can use a light-box to artfully trace, clean up, and
structuralize what were previously stick figures and blotches into more fully fleshed
out, cleaner, more finalized drawings. I tried a page out today by tracing over

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another page on top of it (Drafts 1 & 2) and the difference was actually pretty
noticeable and compelling. So even bad art can be made good by tracing over my
worst art with a light-box. Nothings off limits in terms of tweaking and
improvement.
FINISHED A 6 PAGE COMIC (THE DUEL): I drew something today, that is a lot
of things. My first decent comics scene in a while. A battle and sword fighting
sequence. A continuing narrative. A short story. A continued narrative. If I dont
count the thumbnails, its in fact 3 pages long, minus the 2 pages I have yet to fill in
with a sketchbook and my light-box. Im actually getting pretty good at drawing
comics. I wonder if Ill make the news for being a genius again.
I did it. I finally did it. Im a real cartoonist in a way now. I didnt just draw 1 page today,
or 3 pages today, as I wrote earlier. I drew 6 entire polished and cleaned up, entirely new
sequential art pages today, with panel artwork, anatomy, quality lines, camera shots, and
EVERYTHING. Better late than never I guess.
Comics are making more sense to me now. Now that Ive drawn some actually real
comics, and some good comics with real action, something creatively and professionally
closer to being legit in the big picture, Im starting to understand the comics process
better. Note-making is good, some planning is good. But thumbnail sketches are better.
Thumbnail sketches, in many ways, are non-verbal language, the language of
compositionvisual, non-verbal planning of basic and essential elements of a narrative,
to be jotted down without much forethought. Not all of comics is strategy, but drawing
action, and dialogue, and telling a story or narrative, with pictures and art, is actually just
another, more contemporary and dynamic form of problem-solving. Your problem that
you have to solve is how are you going to make this art/panel/page/composition work?
A lot of drawing in comics can only be done on the spot, improvisational and freestyle
like. Only so much of it can be pre-planned and pre-organized. This is beneficial:
Because if youre aware you can only make progress at your comics art by being at the
drawing table, light-box, clipboard and paper, or sketchbook with a pen-pencil is the only
way to solve the mystery of how to bring a comics page to life (by being there and
achieving through action and proactiveness), all the more reason to spend time at the
page with a drawing utensil.
I dont know if this applies to all creator-writer-artists, but my art generates more power,
a massively higher amount in 1/10th the time and output of writing I do. Art and images
leave a bigger energy field, a heavier energy field, and a power impact on society,
culture, and pop culture than writing does. You dont need an education to appreciate art.
A pictures worth a thousand words
Anonymous
To which I add,

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A Picture has the power level of 1,000 words combined.

How or why this is, I dont know. But if one wants blatant power, its easier and faster to
attain it with high art skill than it is with high literary skill.

Scheduled predictability can definitely be used against one if that predictability is too
widely known. Opponents can form counter-offensives and counter-strategies around the
fact that theyre aware of where youll be. Police, military, and the FBI use this technique
(mapping your enemy/opponents schedule and whereabouts according to the time of
day/night) all the time to catch bad guys. But it can be used in a less extreme way too, to
sabotage someone if for no other reason.
Sun-Tzu Like Modern Strategy:
If your opponent or dissenter is predictable in any way, use his predictability against him,
either to evade his assaults and attacks, or to ambush him in a way, either large or small.
Undermine or outguess his actions as often as possible.
Heh! It turns out my FINISHED COMIC BOOK WORK (I cant emphasize the fact that
I finished it, enough) is so powerful it even got the King of Underground-Goth Comics
Himself, Jhonen Vasquez, to take notice and actually make a public and strategic move to
upload issues of Johnny The Homicidal Maniac to the internet. Miracles instigate other
miracles. I finally drew some new comicsand that actually seemed toin a small
wayinspire Jhonen to do his own comics thing online. That is so fucking cool!!! Im
awesome. I inspired the Master!!! I cant believe I inspired someone that powerful.
Speaking of comics, one shouldnt think in terms of individual illustrations and
images. One should think in terms of problem solving for the work of narration.

2 Most Valuable Things I learned about doing comics is the following:

Drawing pages of art (Difficulty Level: Easy)

Drawing comics panels and pages (Level: Hard)

Not at all the same thing. Sequential art is harder, and more worth attempting.

Preparing to do the work (Difficulty Level: Easy).

Doing the work (Difficulty Level: Hard)

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Too much preparation and only preparing, not doing, only feeds the Nasty
Resistance.
I had a nice long run with the whole childhood thing. But looking back on it, having a
good and innocent childhood didnt at all prepare me for the assault that is adolescence
and adulthood. Where grown ups all act like they hate you, and you parents openly admit
(in subtle ways) that they dont love you anymore, and dont find you cute or appealing
anymore, in which case, as my parents have done with me, they abandon you and stop
supporting your interests or loving you altogether. Typical adulthood parental
abandonment issues.
Growing up in my world means youre parents proudly dont support or love you
anymore, and if they do they intentionally make it awkward and condescending in their
treatment of you as a human and a person.

So apparently, my Asian fanbase is growing. I dont know about the Middle East and
North Africa, but in China, Japan, and Korea, I seem to have accumulated quite a few
admirers. I get to see these kinds of people, many of them artists, in action on
DeviantART. Thats one thing DeviantART is as good as YouTube for. You get to see
the work of your Chinese, Japanese, and Korean fans. Along with other lesser known
countries like the Philippines and Taiwan.
I did a blog post about this. This being the fact that, TV animation has gotten really bad
with shows like Family Guy, Spongebob SquarePants, and Phineas and Ferb. They make
their creators and staffs rich, and are reliable ratings, but how much damage are they truly
doing to the aesthetics of mainstream television. Those shows have shifted television
from an artist/creativity-centric medium to a money-centric one. Invader Zim was well
drawn. Animaniacs was well drawn. Ren and Stimpy, Beavis and Butt-head, and the
Simpsons, while they did look crude at times, still displayed actual artistic and creative
skill in certain ways. The three shows Ive mentioned are the Scooby-Doos of
contemporary animation. Im afraid they offer nothing of quality. Theyre not well
drawn. At all.
End of review.
I look at anime, and almost any anime you will find is well drawn, especially the popular
ones. Its rare to find a poorly executed anime. Anime is often perfect on a technical
level, which is exactly what the teams drawing and writing those anime shows are trying
to achieve. Cable kids shows that get ratings, for at least the last 7 years, have historically
been horribly drawn. And in a way, quite psychotically anti-social. Much like the
producers of the shows themselves. The only other thing Im going to say about
Spongebob, Family Gay, and Phineas/Ferb is that theyre poorly executed, tossed
together without care or pre-planning, poorly written and poorly drawn, and leading the

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cable TV industry into oblivion. Theyre all leading cable television in a direction I dont
wish to follow. Fuck those shows.

I just noticed the fact thatthere sure are a lot of episodes of The Mysteries of Alfred
Hedgehog. I like that show. For an anthro infotainment show, its actually a pretty good
brand. No one but me seems to have heard of it though.
I absolutely despise peopleparticularly ones on TV and the internet and in movies and
animationwho are less ingenious, skillful, or talented than myself. I hate inferior
mortals. Absolutely, positively fucking despise them. Theres nothing inspiring about
seeing an arrogant or stupid piece of shit inferior person who displays less skill and
ingenuity than myself. Im not arrogant. I just hate hypocrites and inferior mortals. Ive
got actual real talent and thats not something I see very frequently in other people, other
than on the robot screen where creative people are roped, prodded, and herded like cows
and cattle, and then murdered and turned into hamburgers in a creative-person grinder
and collective concentration camp like ASMB and DeviantART.

Reaching 6,000 Pages of Art-Writing

Ive reached a new record. Ive completed over 6,000 pages of writing-art, both digitally
and by hand (both). In terms of finished artwork for another comic book, like Cerebus,
Ive finally matched Dave Sims page-count, if you only count the pages hes selfpublished in Cerebus the Aardvark. Im not competing against Sim, and I have a lot of
respect for him and what hes accomplished, and yet at the same time, Im happy I finally
matched his final page rate. Oh yes, I am awesome. Sure, I have a lot of enemies and
quite a few people dont at all like me, both professionally and privately, but youre
bound to make a few rivals, competitors, and enemies if you manage ever reach a total of
1,0006,000 pgs.
This does seem to be a pretty big deal, reaching another Author Milestone and all that.
Celebrating having created well over 6,000 pages of art-writing. Its a lonely
accomplishment. No one really knows about it yet. I wouldnt say its a hollow victory to
reach 6,000 pages. Its more of a lonely victory, a victory celebrated by a 1-man tour de
force. Please excuse me for being a little bit cocky. I create one page for every book I
dont sell.

Many dont know this about me, but I made my online persona debut on the famous
secular website Celebrity Atheists. I used to always post on the Celeb Atheists message
boards, under the alias jared, and was I ever foul mouthed! In a way, back then I was
simply playing up the negative stereotype of the arrogant analytical secular asshole I
knew existed in myself at the time. They eventually deleted their message boards. I was
pretty audacious in my early years online.

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The weight of my own superpowersAll that power and literary weight weighing me
down makes it difficult to stand up and walk about the house. I gotta lie down.
The media keeps portraying Lindsey a bit unfairly. For some reason they keep portaying
her as this librarian-type who seems to have both an infatuation and a fixation, or
obsession, with me of all people. Honestly, I dont know if theres any truth to that, but
she seems to at least be a fan of my artwork. And thats all Im gonna say. Shes not that
obsessed with me, is she?
Honestly, I do strive to be one of the weirdest, most odd and eccentric creators around. I
can out weird almost anyone in America at least. I have inspired some pretty weird
people, Ill admitJhonen Vasquez, George Lucas, Min-Woo Hyung, Yasuhiro
Nightow, Musashi Kishimoto, and Katsuhiro Otomo among them, or so I claimbut
usually its in a positive way.

Recently, Japanese animation screenwriter Dai Sato spoke out against Japanese
screenwriting recently, stating that many Japanese have lost the appreciation for unique
strorytelling, and that the Japanese have grown to prefer cute, superficial stories in place
of those that deal with reality and real problems.
Thats kind of weird how if you type anime into a DeviantART/Google (American)
search, you may as well be typing in fanservice girls instead because thats pretty much
all youre going to find in the Google image results. It may as well be dyslexic,
pornographic, man-hating, and anti-literate. May as well, because thats essentially what
modern mainstream anime and manga has become in America. Gee, thanks Tokyopop
and Funimation! Thanks for making anime be about the wrong things.
My anime and manga stories deal with dark material, and non-cute things. Not just anticute in some ways, but it deals with real issues, from government, to terrorism, to religion
and war, and firearms.
The reason this trend in anime disturbs me so much is because every time I see it, it
reminds me of why anime sucks now and I dont like most anime anymore. I used to
watch anime in the 90s for the very things I could get away from Disney with: Violence,
sexual angst, detail, dark stories, angst, technology, architecture. Those were things you
wouldnt find in Disney. Now when you watch the first anime someone online
recommends to you, its like Jesus Christ all this is, is watching MORE Disney. Cute,
colorful clich, superficial, faggy, pussy shit.
Preparing to do something and take action is not the same thing as taking action and
doing something.

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Results of taking action in art:

Good TV starts playing

Good YouTube videos get uploaded
Similar designs or imagery appears on TV (shows, commercials, movies)
Adult Swim / Adultswim.com shows similar things
People on DeviantART debate it and imitate it, often instantaneously
People read my mind and know what Im going to write and draw
Hackers spread the word that Im available
The idiots come out of hiding and lurking in the shadows
Popular shows start airing

One of the main differences between indie and mainstream comics is in the composition.
The difference between Jhonen and Katsuhiro Otomo / Todd McFarlane, one of them, is
that Otomo and McFarlanes compositions are more fully fleshed out, and there is a lot of
interaction between background (architecture, mecha, and minor props usually) and
foreground (props and characters). Theres a certain three dimensionality and fleshed out
element to companies like Image and Marvel. I need to study this difference in camera
shot and three-dimensionality between fore and back ground.

I kind of doubt Ill be able to find a proper mainstream publisher for my Mono Jubei
comics, be it manga, alternative, or mainstream. Its too out there. Its too weird for any
publisher to tell me yes if I ask them to publish me. And TV-Hollywood is a shark tank.
Id better just take it 1 story, and then 1 issue at a time. Ive got half of 1 issue finished.
Drew the first 10 pages or so, give or take. Now I just need some dialogue and scenes.

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Chapter 44

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September, 2011 (Post 9-11 Remembrance)

But yeah, TV show, I dont want to get devoured by the sharks. No thanks. TV is a shark
tank.

Theres really only one posthumous now-famous comic book artist who is as prolific as
myself in the comics medium, who never achieved fame or success while he was alive
the same way I probably wont: That would be Henry Darger. There might be a lot of
Henry Dargers like myself in the future, if Im not published traditionally while Im alive.
Technology is creating a revolution in publishing, one I didnt notice before, before I read
an article about it in TIME magazine.
There will be a YouTube and DeviantART of literature one day, and no Im not talking
about Fanfiction.net or just Goodreads. Its about more than recognition, sales, or respect.
Its about altering the face of publishing distribution. Traditional print, the printing press,
books, and printed out paper publications, be they books, comic books, or magazines, are
going to be increasingly digital. This newfound movement on the internet is going to be
called New Publishing, and its a partial offshoot of the Web 2.0.
Old Publishing is print books on paper, print comics on paper, print magazines on paper,
and bookstores. Its writing querie letters to agencies, and getting paid.
New Publishing is like anime and hip-hop all over again. Its you selling copies of your
latest book straight out your trunk, just like early hip-hop musicians sold mix-tapes out
their trunk, and early otaku traded VHS tapes of anime shows out of their basement or
room or whatever.
New Publishing is Amazon, Amazon Create Space used to upload and sell Word prose
and fiction writing documents straight from your computer through a Kindle Digital
Reader. Its Print-On-Demand self-publishing like Lulu, Art websites like ArtFlakes and
DeviantART, and high quality hidden gems that you can access through websites you
stumble upon that were created either by marketing staffs or the creators of the works
themselves being showcased. It will also be about linking, Blogging, Tweeting, Banner
Ads, And it is about getting paid if someone notices you and enough people actually want
to purchase copies of your digital print materials.
Either way, this looks to be a fun and democratic next Millennium for Publishing.
Hopefully it will turn out good like YouTube has.

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Tuesday, September 20, 2011,

My very original character, Action-Adventure Comic Book Science-Fiction Fantasy Hero
of my comic book series, Mono Jubei was first drawn by me in the year 2004. Ive been
developing him, his world, and the stories of his life and adventures for what is
apparently the last 7 years. Ive done countless sketches and drawings of him, and
numerous comic book storyboard pages featuring him. And sooner or later Im going to
get a legal copyright of him, because he is my character, and he is my fantasy hero, not
theirs, or anyone elses for that matter, even in anime. He has spawned a lot of imitators
and imposters, thus leading up to my desire to get a legal copyright on my best, most
famous and popular character, Mono Jubei.
Im aiming to paint and draw more fully fleshed out book and comic book or graphic
novel covers for Mono, in the vain of Greg Capullo, Frank Miller, & Frank Frazetta meet
Katsuhiro Otomo. Those guys knew how to paint a cover and splash page. For everything
from Conan to Star Wars.
I might just want to draw and paint full page illustrations of my character Mono for the
rest of my life, take it (the whole thing) to a Rima Jabbur extreme. What Rima does with
figure painting and the Renaissance, I want to do with Frazetta and Frank Miller. Just
make the composition as intense, vibrant, layered, and dynamic as possible, with a
mixture of Notan and Neo-Noir light and shadow. Something very much my own, but in
the future I want my Noir-Notan illustrations to incorporate backgrounds and perspective
and cities or nature. Dynamic Light and Shade and all that. That means use rulers on my
swords.
Before the Internet, In the mid 90s: I remember growing up, either in childhood or
adolescence, I would always aim for the prestigious and glamorous behind the scenes
jobs. Jobs that had a casual and relaxed atmosphere, like an in-studio storyboard artist,
character designer, or series creator working with other old white guys in gray beards and
Hawaiian shirts like John K, Craig Bartlett, or Charlie Adler at Film Roman or the 90s
version Nickelodeon. Because at the time, to me that was what animation was: Bearded
white old men in Hawaiian shirts, telling jokes, having Nerf fights, and producing the
only things you ever saw when watching TV in the early 90s. Because that was animation
at the time, wasnt it. How could it not be?? I had it all set up in my head exactly where I
thought I should end up and be. Too bad I had no clue about the logistics of achieving
something like that, or that later on it wouldnt look anything like that. Some might even
say I had no clue in general. I did used to tend to idealize all my goals quite a bit. In other
words, I didnt want a job. I wanted to go on a permanent vacation, because whatever
job I was envisioning was anything but what I was actual striving for in real life
unconsciously, little did I know.
When you become an adult, aspiration and inspiration becomes less and less, and work
and problem solving for difficult problems takes over, or at least it did for me.

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Its probably not appropriate to say All modern animation studio atmospheres look the
same. Williams Street probably looks very different from Nicktoons Studio.
But think about it:

What does Williams Street offices/studios look like?

What does the typical interior of a French Co-Production Studio Look like? (Sav,
Marathon)
What does the Production I.G. studio look like indoors?
What does LucasFilm Animation Studio Look like indoors?
What do Cartoon Network Studios Look Like Indoors?

One has to wonder. Well, not one. I do though.

How in the world am I going to build a fan following? I have the art and writing and
projects, but none of the charisma or critical reception. No one knows who I am
other than Adult Swim. How do I accumulate an audience? Or is that just luck? No
one ever responds to my attempts to promote myself online, other than Twitter and
YouTube I suppose. Am I not working hard enough? Is that it? Do people not like
me? Do I have too much baggage? Why dont I have an publishing or broadcasting
audience of any sort? Im not frustrated, or at least I try not to be. Maybe Im doing
something wrong. What am I doing wrong anyway? Was it because I used the name
J.M. Strebler instead of Joseph Alberts or J.M. Alberts? Maybe I just need to wait
another three or four or seven years before anything happens. Maybe nothing will happen
(which it isnt happening) until Im in my early 30s or older. I know its not cool to
whine and ask why me, but maybe Im doing things the wrong way if I dont get any
recognition. Maybe I should follow Felipe Smith, Paul Pope, Fred Gallagher, Jared
Hodges, and Svetlana Chmakovas examples and just do more sequential art work, even
though I just did a small amount a week or so ago. What should I do to get closer to their
level? There must be something I can do. Or maybe its simpler than it seems, finish and
work on something, a book. (2012 Later: It wasnt me. Its marketing. I didnt have any)

So as it appears, 22 the Master Builder is often good at both creativity and logic, or art
and science. 22 in Numerology represents and is associated with supreme and
enlightened intellect, will power, rage, power-lust, artistic genius,
invention/inventiveness, vision and being a visionary, international-global affairs,
ultimate and dominant power on all planes, building foundations, and pragmatic
idealism.
I guess I didnt realize what a supreme artistic genius and god I was. God gave me the
gift of artistic genius. And here I was all insecure, actually listening quite a bit of the
bullshit lies my critics and competitors online have been attempting to feed me,
unjustifiably of course. If theres one area of genius that outshines my literary genius, it is
my visionary and international level of artistic genius. No amount of failed plagiarism

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will convince me otherwise. Im a genius and thats pretty much that. Everything I do,
every line I make and put on the page is perfect.
Some people view me as mysterious. Even people who dont like me call me that. No
one knows anything about me on record. I like having a place to hide. If you want to not
be on the radar, youre probably best off not using computers, with rare exceptions.
How dare you not explain your motivations and reasoning to us. The nerve of you. I
will now proceed to mock your name and appearance. That sort of thing I guess.
Im starting to realize how influential Pixar and John Lasseter, two friends of mine,
actually are. Particularly considering the fact that they invented the first ever and the
prototype for a CGI Feature Film. First Gertie the Dinosaur, then Steamboat Willie, then
Snow White and the Seven Dwarfs, then Astro Boy, then Akira, then Ghost in the Shell,
then Toy Story 1 &2. That is animation history 101, in a nutshell.
Truthfully, Im more of a Pixar Defector than anything else. My old mentor, Phil, is
actually quite close to John Lasseter. He worships the guy practically. I dont see whats
so great about people like Miyazaki or Lasseter. Its just the classical style of CGI
animation in feature film format, and the 2-D anime equivalent of it. None of those guys
care about and cherish detail and layering the way, say, Otomo, McFarlane, or George
Lucas does. Detailed, moody, atmospheric animation, whether 2-D or CG, is a worthy
aesthetics goal, not just good storytelling and screenwriting/storyboarding/animating
(Pixar). Its just as challenging. But detail doesnt usually sell in the Digital Feature Film
box office. That much is definitely clear. Maybe it will one day, but now, films like the
theatrical releases of Final Fantasy: The Spirits Within, and Star Wars: Clone Wars: The
Movie Version underperformed at the box office, and unless theyre as creative as The
Nightmare Before Christmas, they might still go ignored unless they get more original in
some way.
Before you begin production on an animation pilot as a producer, you need to have at
least a few things in order, in the beginning, specifically, pre-production elements.
BOOKMARK
You need to hire the core team, and you need at least the following pre-production parts:
Script (VERY important)
Budget
Character Designs and Model Pack
Prop Design
Background Design
Concept Art
Storyboards
Animatic Animation Pencil Tests

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All of this needs to be approved by the co-producers (i.e. me) and director, and assistant
director.
Things to be done later
Actual Keyframe Animation
Inbetween frame animation
Animation Cells
Ink and Paint department
Voice Actors
Sound direction and Editing
Music and Soundtrack Mixing
Color co-ordination
Cleanup
Overseas post-production
Staff must be paid on a regular basis
Editing, or Editors
The production must be brought in on budget and on time, and at a satisfactory level

With blood as light red as my great, great, great, great grandmothers hair.
Friday, September 23rd, 2011,
Darnit. Im a writer. I should know what Im going to write about. But writing on
assignment. I kind of got a few problems with that. My strongest form of writing is script
formatting and stream of consciousness. Narrative and storytelling arent always my
strong points. Actually, I can write fictional narratives, but its incredibly strenuous.
I was watching Generation YouTube on ABCs 20/20. If theres anything I take away
from that encounter, its that the internet revolution I helped build is probably a whole lot
bigger than I tend to give it credit for. A whole lot bigger. YouTube, Adult Swim,
Toonami, Google, DeviantART, Twitter, Blogger. Its all quite a bit larger in scope and
influence than it looks on the surface. Youtube and the revolution it epitomizes is one of
the biggest revolutions in the history of the world. Im glad I could be a part of it, even if
it is quasi-anonymous success. They sure as hell recognize me on the TV shows I
watch though.

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Saturday, September 24, 2011,

Discipline is an important creative trait to have.
But Im going to need a lot more discipline for drawing anything and everything, all the
time, 24/7. Maybe picturing drawing lines and constructing art on a page in my minds
eye before I get to work might help. After those 6 pages Ive done, Im sure I can do
anything and everything.
Wow. I just realized something. Not a single person in comics/manga or animation/anime
has even half as much power as I do, online and internationally, on a good day. Im a
Titan of Industry. Those are outdated mediums anyway. Practically pre-fucking-historic.
Hate on me if you want to. It doesnt matter to me really.

Sunday, September 25, 2011,

I just filled up my mp3 player with music earlier this morning. Now Im writing while
listening to the radio on my Sony mp3 Walkman.
If I do start making money, that will mean Ill be able to travel, locally, and both
nationally and internationally, whenever I feel like and why-ever I feel like it, to
wherever I want. There definitely seems to be a certain amount of freedom that comes
with having a lot of money. It would be a dream come true being able to buy everything
on my online shopping list AND having a chauffeur. I can pick up fast food with my
chauffeur. That would rock. Its been a longtime dream of mine to go on a fieldtrip or
joyride in a caror any vehicle for that matterjust feeling the wind of the air
conditioning in the car and seeing the road and buildings, cars, and trees pass me by. Its
relaxing and calming, seeing all those semi-trucks drive by, and feeling the wind, and
watching trains, restaurants, and used car dealerships pass by on the road. Its liberating.
Its freedom when all youve known is the prison of lying around lethargically, bedridden
for months on end in your room, a prisoner of your own life and home, all because youre
poor and dont have a job or ride. By traveling by vehicle, I am on a journey to find
Myself. Its quite wonderful, those road trips and joyrides. Sometimes it feels really,
really good to be out of and away from the house and out on the central Florida
roadways, like when theres hardly anyone on the road and Im driving out into the
Florida hills and country up north not all that far from here. Downtown Orlando and the
cities and coasts of Ft. Lauderdale are nice as well. I know these locations quite well. I
should write a novel about them.
Its Sunday, The Lords Day. Saturday is a day of Rest. Both days suit me quite well.

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Fashion choices:
Black Tee Shirt; Denim Blue Jeans
Black Tee Shirt; Khaki Capris
Black Long-Sleeve Turtleneck; Khaki Capris
Black Long-Sleeve Turtleneck; Khaki Capri Shorts
Black Long Sleeve Turtleneck; Denim Blue Jeans
Denim Blue Jeans; Black Shirt; Unbuttoned Flannel Long Sleeve Shirt
Trenchcoat; Black Tee Shirt; Khaki Capris

I think thats what I was missing in my life: A job title. Now I sort of actually have one.
The key to succeeding financially is:

Never knowingly give the upper hand to your competition.

See opportunities others do not see. And once you do, exploit them.
Be original in any field you go into.
Never listen to critics and your enemies and competition.

Honestly, Im pretty sure Ill be making money by 20152020, but I dont know exactly
how much.
Production of new artwork is going to be halted for a while. Sorry. But its the art or the
money, and the money wins, without question.

Most good and/or famous life stories have a Timeline. My timelinebefore my

adolescence and young adulthooddoesnt exist.
Upon reading some news, the market is clearly in a state of volatility and chaos. But not
in any of the industries Im laying the groundwork for. Those areas are actually pretty
stable. Stuff like Google, YouTube, Pixar, Anime and American animation production,
manga. All create profits, and revenue and make their exploiters very powerful, day in
day out. I dont see any of that money they make off my contributions, but I still do make
a lot of money at the end of the day, so it pretty much evens out.
Two questions to ask yourself as a writer:
Is this where my career peaks?
What is my career defining moment, if any?

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Elements of Writing to Keep Tabs On:

Dialogue
Plot and Story
Character Traits
Character Development (Motivation, Reasoning)
Backstory
Vocabulary
Narration, Storytelling
Consistency
Description
Action
Rhythm and Pacing
Subject Matter
Topics (Topical)
Inciting Incident
Vision
Genre
Storytelling format (Screenwriting, Script, Manuscript, Book, Comic Book,
Movie, TV)

Apparently, Morgan Freeman actually has an acting career so established and ancient, it
goes back further than my entire family tree. Was watching a Documentary Channel
Documentary episode on him, and thats impressive. In my opinion its not just about
being successful or having a hit, its working on a lot of stuff over long amounts of time
to, entire series of decades, like 20 years spans at a time. Same thing with Peter Cullen
and all the rest. Adult Swim and even Toonami are actually pretty young in terms of
broadcasting history and Hollywood historical standards. Sometimes a 20 year career
history doesnt even start until you turn 30 or so. Sometimes even 40. Im just now
starting to realize this. Im getting older. Anyone whos career predates my birth year
(1983) Im 10 times more likely to respect, worship, and appreciate than any of these
Young Hollywood Tikes. I mean, yes theyre successful, but they havent even been
alive as long as I have. How wise could they be? You too DeviantART

Topics I write about in End Times:

Government
God and the Devil, Religion
Weapons and Ballistics
Chivalry and Honor
Heroism
Villainy

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Topics: Continued:

Fighting and Martial Art Combat

Localism and Internationalism
Violence and Rage
Espionage and Investigation
Law and Order, Crime and Punishment
Terrorism and Justice
Drama and Suspense
Horror
Asian and World Cinema

You see, Im a real animation and literary writer. Therefore I write about real things. All
serious writers at some point write about real things, even if its only in private, or in a
journal, where their sorting out their allegorical writings which bear no resemblance to
the real world.

Favorite Screenwriters:
Quentin Tarantino
George Lucas
Yoshiyuki Tomino
Jhonen Vasquez
Aaron McGruder
Savin Yeatman-Eiffel
Thomas Romain
I write scripts and design characters and storyboards here and there

Monday, September 26, 2011,

Overall, Id say Ive made quite a few enemies in the comic book and television
animation world. But stepping on toes was kind of worth the trouble, because that
happens every time you establish yourself. You wont be able to establish yourself if
youre not making some enemies. Thats just the natural order of things.

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Tuesday, September 27, 2011

80s & 90s TV American animation shows?
My shows?
Japanese Animation Shows?
Franime?
They all have about a snowballs chance in hell of ever seeing regular weekday, or even
morning or weekend rotation on TV again. TV is stubborn. It only wants to play dumb
shit for idiots. Stuff with no real well-done execution, timing, or creativity. With rare
exceptions like The Hub and Boomerang, who do play some stuff from the 90s
This is what things like online streaming video, Roku, Netflix, Hulu, YouTube,
Toonzaki, and Amazon Video on Demand are for. For filling that void. And I plan to fill
this void as well, by watching all those shows traditional TV has chosen to deprive me of
Now I know what a 60 or 70 year-old feels like. What with the never being able to watch
97% of the TV you watched as a kid thing, anywhere other than on DVD or YouTube, if
they even have it.

What does it take to create a literary work as great as mine?

Alcohol, starvation, insomnia, lack of sex, profound loneliness, suburban isolation,
dysfunctional sibling and parental houseguests, tenacity, perseverance, depression,
mania, paranoia, lack of successful relationships, arrogance, egotism, being eccentric, bad
health.
Any number of these things could be responsible for my literary power.

The 22 Master Builder Writes a Script

1 & 3/4ths of a year later
Thats kind of funny. Back at the beginning of 2010 around February of that year,
in Chapter or Commentary 11 on this computer is the time I first started taking
screenwriting seriously, and so far Ive done a good job. Not long after I started, I
began making real progress, once I began setting my mind to it (the task and goal,
of becoming a successful screenwriter of drama-action cinema on TV). And less
than 2 years later, Ive even managed to write a combined manuscript-screenplay
total of 34 pages of script and narration, half of it a script / half of it a novel (so far,
or the equivalent of around 1 TV episodes worth of script and screenwriting.
And in retrospect, I realize I have it a bit easier than ol Kill em All Tomino, or
Yoshiyuki Tomino. Even when he was writing his great narrative stories of much
character development and depth, drama, and political intrigue, he still had to do so

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within the restrictions of Japanese childrens TV broadcasting and marketing.

Meaning even when his scripts were at their highest level of military, technological,
and political intrigue, Tomino still had toys he was forced to sell, in terms of the
brand of Gundam. I wasnt aware of it and henceforth couldnt appreciate it at first,
but thats the great thing about writing scripts in the United States animation
industry, in the so-called Adult Swim Era. The sponsors do the selling. Youre not
Yoshiyuki Tomino. You dont have any toys or corporate tie-ins to sell, other than
the realism of the world youve made. You essentially do have a liberating amount
of freedom as an American screenwriter. Also, as a dramatist, writer, and
storyteller, you can take a harder look at real world issues, if you so choose. Theres
just a lot more freedom here than just trying to conform to the whims of the market,
unless the writer is a second rate hack writer I suppose, whose career depends on
that sort of thing due to the fact that his job, in childrens TV is tied to trends.
Wednesday, September 28, 2011
Things to write about that Im not normally into:
News
Sports
Crime and Punishment
Law and Order
Politics and Government
Military
War
Dialogue (just dialogue, by itself)
Scenery Description (just scenery description, by itself)
If I succeed as a writer, Im thinking of producing a so-called published scripts book
the way weve seen for movies like Pulp Fiction and The Matrix, and other Hollywood
films, except it would be for an animated series. There are a lot of unseen and
unpublished scripts out there. Especially in animation. The only thing close to a
published animation script book that I know of is Writing for Animation by Jeffrey Scott.
But thats an academic book, not a behind-the-scenes production one. My reason for
publishing a TV show scriptbook? It could help a lot of writers. And also, Im better at
showing the medium in action than just sitting by on the sidelines and expounding on
theories. Plus, I get the feeling my screenwriting style has a multidimensional and literary
quality to it, which is not found in most animation scripts, even sitcoms. Most behind the
scenes animation production books focus on artistic pre-production, as opposed to literary
pre-production.

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My first drafts have an explosive, kinetic energy to them. As well they should,
considering thats all that Ive tended to write so far, with rare exceptions. Almost
everything I write and publish is a first draft. People think Im a great writer now? Wait
until I start editing, revising, reviewing, and rewriting!
The good news is, I have a lot of decent material available to edit, revise, and rewrite.
Theres plenty of revision source material to draw from.
The bad news is, the more first drafts I produce without revising, the more time my
writing process will take.
Theres a saying that goes Writing is rewriting. Writing is writing. It isnt always
rewriting, but a lot of it is.

Writers Update
Forms of writing I have some experience dealing with:

Screenwriting
Action-&-Fighting Scenes
Dialogue
Outlines
Plot and Story (beginning, middle, and end)
Description
Narration
Manuscript
Regular Script
Character Development
Backstory

BOOKMARK
By now, Ive done so much writing, for pretty much every aspect of screenwriting, I now
have unpaid and beginning experience in writing scenes, dialogue, outlines, description,
basic plot, and narration. Ive established territory in all the bases. Ive covered all the
basics and fundamentals. And it only took me 1 years (20102011) to master the art of
getting started in the fundamentals. Im quite happy with my progress. Im starting to feel
like an actual professional writer now. Im actually starting to master the art and craft of
narrative format. In my opinion of course. Others can take of it what they will, and say
what they will. I remain confident.

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Writing scripts and literary narration for novels and TV-cinema isnt super hard, per say,
but it does at the very least take a lot of concentration, energy, and concerted effort. But if
youre willing to put in the time, your writing can yield results in what will probably be a
reasonable amount of time. The harder you work, the more you evolve. Ive already
established my skills as a novice screenwriter and novelist. Ive proven to myself I can
do the work. Now its become more of a matter of sharpening those skills and their
efficiency, as opposed to acquiring and establishing them, which Ive mostly already
done. The thing is, when it comes to writing skills, you generally have to establish an
aptitude for the format long before you develop a coherent and linear 3-act narrative and
story arc structure. I put a lot of effort into mastering form before I applied any of my
content (which I already created on some level in my notes) and suiting it to that form.
My screenwriting and fiction manuscripts remind me of Stephen King, John Woo, and
Quentin Tarantino. What Im building in terms of comics, novels, and TV animation is
similar in nature. Maybe not as dark. But still, pretty twisted and dark. But Im also trying
to convey hyper-drama as well, along with science fiction fantasy. Pure escapism. Im
happy with what Ive built so far, how its turning out, and what I will continue to build
over time during the next decade or so. I might even have a finished manuscript or
screenplay completed sometime within the next decade, between now (2011) and 2021.
Heres how my productivity breaks down:
Out of 100% of materials made for my creative projects:
80% of it is purging filler crap to get to the good stuff. A creative crime against the
humanities.
The other 20% leftoverof what gets produced and manifestedactually makes sense
and isnt a crime against the humanities.

Current Projects in Rotation

God Talk
The Phantom and the Voice on the Phone
Shadow Walker
Parallax: The Legend of Mono Jubei
Oliver-E: Quantum Sorcerer
The Dream Lords

Completed 3 or so pages today in my journal, where Ive written almost exclusively

about my screenwriting career.

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My creative powers and abilities (storyboard comics and screenwriting) are very strong.
The force is strong in this one. But my strengths and abilities lack focus. I need to learn to
control and attain command over my abilities through the discipline and hard work of
constant training and long, strenuous hours of training and practice to develop my
willpower and discipline.
Bonjour. French comics are actually quite good with things like lighting, cinema,
perspective, textures, and costume/character design.
Im going to be the King of American Action Comics one day. Just you wait.
Believe it!!!
Those 6 pages of storyboard action were fun and all, but Im itching to get back in the
ring.
Woo-Ping Yuen is but a poster-boy for an entire generation. Numerous generations. Yuen
Woo-Ping is a master fight director, but the thing is, there are many great martial arts
choreographers and fight directors living and working in Hong-Kong, or who worked in
Hong-Kong at one point. Id love to collaborate with some of them in comics and
animated production form, for things like storyboards and key frame animators, post
production and all that. Just do the whole Last Airbender thing. Or the Star Wars:
Clone Wars Thing. Or perhaps a mixture of both.
Im more than a bit fanatical and obsessive about storyboarding fight scenes. 6 pages of
fighting (sword fighting) is a healthy amount! But there can always be more that gets
done. Ive got some new techniques I want to repeat and or try out for the first time, like
solid objects shattering into pieces on violent strikes and impact (like in my Drawing
Kung Fu Action Comics learning book). And while I know its not good to jump ahead,
and its as good for me to take it and problem solve my motions and actions one panel
and strike and blow at a time, Im aiming for an eventual goal of at least 7 to 14 pages, or
a lot more. American artists dont tend to illustrate fight sequence that last all that long,
or do what Asian Choreographers refer to as American fighting style: One Punch and
Youre Out, which if use improperly only indicates laziness on the part of the illustrator
and nothing more.
Either way, Im eager to return to picking up a sketchbook or piece of paper and just
drawing away.
Books like Dragonball Z tend to re-use fight sequence camera compositions many times
over, both in episodes, but also in movies, and Openings (anime theme sequences). Star
Wars: The Clone Wars also re-uses many composition. So essentially when developing
fight sequences, its okay to re-use thumbnail sketches, as long as you add some form of
variety to your sequences of camera shows, like switches from over the shoulder shots to
full shots and close ups of hands and eyes. Thats how I do it. Thats how I roll.
Recycling artwork in a revised and varied fashion works for me.

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My comic book pages and storyboards are building in quality with the more of them I
draw. With each page of comics and storyboards you draw, you get 10 times better at
drawing comics with each finished thumbnail page! Thinking about the work, preparing
for the work, aspiring to do the work, and writing about the work, despite it sounding like
the noble thing to do cannot build skill. The only way to build skill in comics as an artist
is to: A) Read the comics of myself and others. Study them. Analyze the comics flaws
and strengths, andB) Draw comics, because the more pages I draw, the better I get.
You get better at anything from stopping the contemplation of it and just doing it. I dont
know why I wasnt aware the best way to build experience was through action, NOT
documentation, analysis, and contemplation. If I had been aware of that comics truth
from the beginning, Manifesto probably wouldnt be 1,000 pages long, because I would
have been drawing that many pages of comics instead from the very beginning.
Artwork and Drawing takes a certain amount of dexterity: Physical dexterityhand eye
coordination(Sensory) Motor Skills. Im beginning to build some strength and muscles
in my hand I didnt have before, from all this mini drawing. Ive done 5 full pages of
thumbnails, and when I got to the 5th page for today, I had a feeling Ive never felt before.
For the first time ever, my right hand cramped up and a lot of blood rushed to my hand.
My right hand was paralyzed and unable to draw temporarily. Thats never happened to
me from typing. It only happened when I was holding the sketchbook, and had left it
open, in an attempt and effort to train myself and realize: Dont be so picky about
what or when I draw, and just draw everything, all the time, both on and off the
computer and TV (DVDs, TV shows, movies, animation channels, internet images
and videos), like all that ocean of art in my comics collection, and the big stack of
drawings Ive already created, or with my music (my Sony mp3 player).
Id definitely like to write and/or draw a bestselling comic book or novel one day. I love
the author bios when a book is mentioned and it says something like [book title] has 2
million copies in print, and is available in 17 languages
Im not just building a new genre of comics and a new kind of production process for
comics and animation in general. Through the phenomenon of the internet Im
influencing comic book and animation artists, authors, filmmakers, and writers from
around the world, in countries such as The United States, The United Kingdom, France,
South America, Canada, Korea, China, and Japan. Im reaching all of the mainstream
international markets on some level already. This is because my online sphere of
influence already reaches those World Markets & Territories. Ive always wanted to
be a man of the world, and in some way have international credibility on some level.
Through becoming a mainstream creator, artist, filmmaker, screenwriter, and novelist, Ill
be able to attain that goal one day.
Being on the internet every day (just about), on a technical and statistical level, has made
me quite international. Im very much a man of the world, not just the United States.
Both Google and YouTubeboth of which I have content onare easily accessible for
free from Japan and China. And when I was posting artwork on DeviantART, I had a

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large worldwide audience there too. And my artwork is available for direct sale through
Art Flakes dot com, which is published through Berlin and directly marketed at many
consumers online in Germany. I dont have a problem with any of this. Im happy to be
accepted by thousands of people online, in dozens of countries around the world.

Best Academic Creative Books Ive Ever Read

Animation: From Script to Screen

Producing Animation
Understanding Comics
The Natural Way to Draw
Drawing on the Right Side of the Brain
The Artists Way
Story by Robert McKee
Screenplay by Syd Field
How to Write For Animation
Dynamic Wrinkles and Drapery
Dynamic Light and Shade
How to Draw Comics The Marvel Way
How to Draw Manga (The Book Series)

While Ill probably never surpass the detail levels of Otomo and McFarlane (considering
almost no one does that), Im starting to realize I might actually have started surpassing
the draftsmanship levels of both Cerebus and Scud. No easy task. But considering Ive
been trained by Rima Jabbur, who draws like Michelangelo and Leonardo and who draws
like she lived the Italian Renaissance in real life, I suppose it shouldnt be that shocking
Im beginning to surpass even some of my heroes, who are still my heroes in a way, but
on some level you still have to allow yourself to compete with even those that inspire
you.
Graphic Novels whose art level mine has surpassed:
Scud
Bone
Blankets
Cerebus
Nny 777
John Buscema
Books (and artists) I havent suprassed:
Blacksad / Calvin and Hobbes
Spawn / Dark Minds / Battle Chasers / Danger Girl / Adam Warren

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Blade of the Immortal / Dragonball Z / Akira

Paul Pope
Lindsey:
I think its time I stopped emailing Lindsey so much. If shes going to succeed or fail,
shes got to do it on her own, independent of my influence. OK. End of story. Everyone
keeps hounding me about Lindsey saying shes pathetic and all that other bullshit.
Whether she is or isnt is irrelevant. Shes no more or less pathetic than all the other
beginning comic book artists on the internet. If shes got questions for me Ill answer
them, otherwise I think Im going to go back to doing my own thing.
The End

Im starting to become really obsessed with Generator Rex. I think theyre onto
something there. Heres what I take away from it: I want to do something similar.
Slugfests, gun shootouts, and sword fights, and combinations thereof all going on in the
foreground while theyre also kinds of Otomo-inspired SF-esque funkadelic architectural
metal machine-buildings in the background. It would make a great comic. It would be my
interpretation of certain Rex episodes. Man of Action is clearly an awesome group, kind
of like CLAMP or something. Except with more action and combat fist fighting. In other
words, its right up my alley.
Action-Adventure Wuxia Apocalypse Drama. Its kind of my specialty.

Parallax shall now be known as Apocalypse Blade.

Cyber Expressionism
Gothic Science Fantasy Action
Dark Fantasy
Dark Romanticism
Neo-Noir Notan
All these and more describe my design style.
I kind of like being a beloved international treasure in Europe and Asia. Its nice! Being a
beloved national treasure, or at least one in the making, is good for the soul. Especially
when you feel unappreciated in the city you live in currently.
In terms of my drawing and writing plans as a comic book storyboard artist and novelist
and screenwriter, my horoscope says Im likely to procrastinate in implementing the
execution of plans in these areas, since my Scorpio Sign is in Pisces Rising with Natal
Ascendant in Capricorn, which means Im part Pisces and part Capricorn for the time
being. I show some of those personality traits for a limited time

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The good news is, Todd McFarlane has characteristics of this kind too, except his are
always that way. Hes a Pisces. Therefore he has many of my current traits too.
Ill probably be able to draw pretty well during October. Though I might procrastinate at
the basics a bit, if and when I do draw Ill probably do some great thumbnails, at the
least, most likely. Pisces are natural artists.

One of the most enjoyable and rewarding elements of choreographing storyboard combat
and fighting is getting to explore various styles of fighting and combat styles and
techniques. This is quite common in Hollywood and Hong Kong live action, but far less
common in American cartoons and anime. DBZ for example never utilizes a specific
style of martial arts. Its a generic hybrid style, unrecognizable. Meanwhile samurai
shows like Rurouni Kenshin, Blade of the Immortal, and Samurai Champloo all explore
various weapon-styles and branded stances.
I just realized it. What I dowhatever exactly it is that I dosells. American animation
fight choreography and fight scenes in American animation, sells. They ring in the
ratings. My style is profitable. Action almost always has been profitable. It just hasnt
been much of a critical darling. I mean, think about it. How many fanmade Best Anime
Fights videos are there that have emerged on YouTube. Whether its DBZ or Afro
Samurai. The fans love that kind of thing. They even remix it dozens of times online.
Fans love a good cinematic and animated or illustrated fight. Fighting comics and
animation sells.
Im strongly starting to suspect my birth mother is a mute of some sort. Every time I call
her on the phone to ask her questions about heritage or my birth father, she says little or
nothing. Not outspoken at all. If I didnt know any better Id say shes a 56 year old mute
who barely knows how to speak, even though its to her own long lost son. I really am
beginning to hate the fact that mutism seems to run (at the very least) on my birth
mothers side of the family. I talked like she does too. When I was 5. Mute and scared to
talk to people, hiding yourself away from the world. I think my birth mother is a bit
eccentric and reclusive. Pretty weird. Kind of beginning to frustrate me now that I have
an easier time reaching her by phone at least.
And my NUMBER 1 Pet Peeve is people who overstep my personal boundaries, whether
its physical, spiritual, mental, or psychological, and just get up all in my face without
thinking twice about it. That offends me deeply. People do that to me all the time, just
getting way to down in the mud and personal. Disgusting.

Im going to learn when to stop. Im going to teach myself to set the goal of 1 thumbnail
drawing a day. Draw 1 small tiny thumbnail drawing a day, either original or copies, and
then stop.

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Monday, October 03, 2011,

No ones getting rich doing what I do. I was an incredibly poor financial planner and bad
entrepreneur as a child and youth. I never earned any form of real profit from all that hard
work I did over the years. All my hard work basically went out the window around 10 or
so years ago. Now Im poor. I dont have any money to my name, and rich mental health
professionals treat me like a retarded and insane hobo who came into their office from off
of the street. They want me locked away. They dont want me to succeed. Theyre more
than a little psychotic. Shrinks are psychotic. Or at least the ones Ive met are. Their
sense of priorities for their patients is pretty messed up. But its impossible for me to stop
them. Theyre too powerful, and too evil.
Yay. For the first time since childhood, no ones jealous of me. I love having a nice,
freedom-centric jealousy-free life. Ive been so used to people being jealous of my
success and early achievements, and I was getting so used to people saying all this nasty
crap about me because they were jealous of me. Now Im free and pretty much a regular
person. Feels great.

Unfortunately I have been a tad bit delusional in terms of assessing my own success.
Becoming a self-publisher hasnt made me a success. Its bankrupted me. My ambitions
have bankrupted me financially. Theyve put me in the red. Ive bankrupted myself and
my family in the name of attempting to (and failing to) succeed as a published and
professional comic book artist. I went bankrupt a long time ago. Im in Chapter 11.
How did it all go so wrong? How did all of that hard work and effort I put in just get
tossed out the window like that?
Theres going to need to be a stopping point. A point I retire from comic books. I used to
take a Stan Lee style approach to retirement, saying Why should I retire, this isnt
work. Sorry Jose, but Im afraid it IS work.

Ive got a good thing going here. I write something down here, and 5 minutes later it
appears on or gets quoted or paraphrased in 7 different TV shows and 22 different
websites. Im creating instant and real time pop culture from out of thin air.
If someone values their privacy, they wont use computers. And they especially wont
use the web. Those who stay off the radar the fastest and most silently are those that
never go near a computer and/or never use one or anyin general.
I definitely failed as a comics and animation artist. This would bother me if I wasnt
successful in other fields from the very beginning. Some things just werent meant to be.
Me ever succeeding as an animator or cartoonist is a huge one of those things. Good
thing I know how to make my own cars. Building automotive parts as part of a large scale
automotive project is more fun than I initially thought.

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Friday, October 07, 2011,

I want to draw and write more, but Im afraid the actual kinetic, spiritual, and
psychological process of drawing and writing fiction and fantasy stories uses up all of my
energy and power. Its fatiguing. It fatigues me, and massively so. The pressure and
politics of the industry and community drains me of all my energy and power, leaving me
a weak, lethargic, shriveled up rag of a person. I wish I could say I have a solution for my
energy crisis. But I dont. I never have had a solution for it. School, Andrew, the socalled War on Terror, Bryan (the relentless evil sociopathic loser and stalker), constant
media attention in the spotlight I received, and all my online volunteer work and some
of the fighting, chaos, and conflict it involved, drained me of all my energy, and now I
have no energy to do anything. Even watching anime on DVD is a struggle. Everything
exhausts me. The very things I used to love so much now fill me with anxiety, terror, and
dread. I already know what my critics reaction will be, that everything Ill ever do in my
entire life will be shit in their eyes, some big joke to them, the people who fail a lot worse
than I do. Stress, extreme hunger, malnourishment, and lack of privacy exhausts me a
whole hell of a lot, and so does medication, anger, and frustration. Those things all are
very physically draining. All of this has been killing my productivity lately
Mysterious and Secret Media Fraternities and Organizations Im a Part of (in some way)
Communities
The Cartoon Illuminati
Google
YouTube
Adult Swim
Cartoon Network
Pixar
Funimation
Tokyopop
Bang Zoom Productions
Manga Entertainment
Adult Swim Message Boards
DeviantART
Oni Press
Slave Labor Graphics
Im building the foundations and groundwork for a new kind of comic book. One that
borrows from and sources from all of my favorite influences, and combines them all into
one hybrid creative market archetype, and production and aesthetic prototype.
Elements Im fusing creatively and technically:

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Indie Comic Books / Source: Comic Shops

Storybooks / Borders
Black Ops and Espionage Novels (Tom Clancy) / Borders
Action and Wuxia Hong-Kong-Hollywood Screenwriting (John Woo, Shaw,
Quentin Tarantino) / AMC
Gothic German Expressionism (Burton, Vasquez) / Internet, TV, DVD
Co-Productions (aesthetics, pre-production) / TV / Trade Publications
Neo-Noir Notan (Sin City, Bullet Tracer [Calvin]) / Borders
Sword and Sorcery Comics (Conan, Robert E. Howard, Michael Moorcock,
Elric) / Internet
City and Architecture Perspective Comics (Franco-Belgian Comics, Moebius,
Otomo Katsuhiro) / Internet / Borders
Dark Romanticism (Nathanial Hawthorne, Edgar Allen Poe, HP Lovecraft,
Eugene Delacroix) / Internet, Wikipedia, School
High Fantasy (Lord of the Rings) / Borders
Cyberpunk, SF (The Matrix, Isaac Asimov) Theatres / Internet / Borders
Science-Fantasy Epic (Star Wars, Michael Moorcock, Elric) / Theatres / DVD /
Borders/ Internet
Anime and Manga (Akira, Production I.G., Dragonball, Naruto) (TV, Borders,
Internet
Choreography (John Kreng, Yuen-Woo Ping, Hong Kong, John Woo, Corey
Yuen) / DVD Featuretes / Theatres / Internet / Amazon

In a way, my work is influenced by everything I see.

List of Sources I initially discoveredon one level or anotheronline:

Goth German Expressionism

Sword and Sorcery Comics
City and Architecture Perspective Comics
Dark Romanticism
Cyberpunk, SF
Science-Fantasy Epic
Anime
Manga
Choreography
Hong-Kong-Hollywood

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Chapter 46

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Friday, October 07, 2011,

Ever since I found out that Noir is the French word for the color Black, Ive been
fascinated by, and addicted to, the aesthetics and execution of the Noir genre. Whether in
comics or animation. Interest in this genre is at an all time high in the mainstream and in
the international film and comics world. From the Sam Noir graphic novel, to the French
animated film Renaissance, to the anthropomorphic Cerebus-esque painted comic book
Blacksad, to the live action adaptation of Frank Millers equally neo-noir comic book Sin
City, to my own comic book cover style. Noir, or Black Cinema and Comics seems to
be everywhere, particularly in French comics and animation, and in live action film.
Black, while seemingly one dimensional and traditionally considered evil on the
surface, allows for much expressive potential in the arts, literature, and cinema.
Im quite proud and more than happy to at least appear like and feel as though somehow I
pave a path to this in other peoples eyes, somehow come across like Im one of those
modern day mysterious auteurs who have his finger on the pulse of this movement. And
in one sense, I do.
The French were some of the first appreciators and connoisseurs of the Black Cinema
movement, the Noir Thing.
To me, Black and Dark are the same genre. Noir Fantasy, Dark Fantasy, Gothic Fantasy.
Future Noir (Future Black; Blade Runner). Noir and Goth. German and American
Expressionism. Though other people dont always think this way, theyve always been
integrated in the creative parts of my mind. The words and terms can be translated and
intermixed both ways. Not just one way. Noir is not as big in Japan, but if you ask me,
its only a matter of time, what with stuff like Darker Than Black, Hipira, Big O I & II,
Black Jack, Ghost in the Shell (Noir), Berserk, Akira, Strait Jacket, X/1999, Hellsing,
Vampire Hunter D, Trinity Blood, Sword of the Stranger, and Karas I & II. I dont know
if the color black will ever be as heavily used in Japan as big eyes, but WHATEVER
direction it takes over there, it seems well beyond being on its way.

Im getting a bit tired of wanting to be the best and most successful person in every major
area of focus in my life. Im already everywhere. Im already on every TV show, movie,
and commercial, even if its not always glamorous. That doesnt lessen the
accomplishment of beingEVERYwhere, all ubiquitous and omnipresent like. I should
count the small amount of success I already have achieved, primarily on TV, in anime &
animation, and on the internet, but also in some movies. I may be a slave and prisoner to
the sweatshop of my own success, but at least Ill never stop being on everyones mind.
And its not just me. Every time I go out in public, there are billboards, and bus ads too.
And news and talk shows and newspapers. And all of the people trying to be me and
model their look after me. Im It. Im the It Guy. Ive got that X-Factor thing people talk
about, by being normal for the most part in a crazy psychotic world of psycho families
and psycho kids and psycho adults and psycho TV channels and psycho journalists, and
psycho authority figures. The worlds gone to shit, everyone refuses to shut the fuck up

P a g e | 93

for once in their life. And yet I remain the same. Im still cool somehow, yet everything
else isnt, with rare exceptions. Everythings turned to shit. South Park covered that
aspect quite well.
Areas of Current Interest:
Reading
Numerology, Master Numbers (22, Master Builder)
The Myers-Briggs Temperament Sorter
Horoscopes
Zodiac Signs
Business Astrology
Business INTP / INTJ
Handwriting Analysis
YouTube
HTPC
TV-PC
Roku
Netflix
DVR
Painkillers
Alcohol
Meditation
Retrospective Reflection and Contemplation
Not Intuition or Introspection
Treadmill
Business Negotiation
Not Drawing Mono
Sleep

I am a bit of a Film, Television, Animation, and Comic Book Theorist. I invent and
develop theories to suit my style and the medium all the time.
Its actually kind of baffling in my view to see someone like Roger Ebertfilm critic and
winner of the Pulitzer Prizeposting on Twitter; or a Nobel Prize winner, like Obama,
for example. Does this signify Twitter is important to society and cultural media and
communication, like YouTube and the Web 2.0, or does it simply mean this newfound
medium draws and attracts important people? Twitter hasnt been around that long, so its
hard to say definitively. Time Magazine and Time.com write a lot of articles involving
YouTube and Twitter, and they practically define what and who has influence and power.
Jhonen Vasquez has become both a strong ally and one of my harshest critics. Its hard to
make definitive statements about him anymore.

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Saturday, October 08, 2011,

I paint, ink, sketch, pencil, illustrate, and draw with what I like to refer to as a quiet
mastery. Ive already mastered art. Im drawing and producing art at a French level, and
Ive mastered the form as they have, both in color and black and white. The French are
Artistic World Masters, and Ive already reached their level at the age of 27, soon to be
28, when the 7-year-cycle begins anew at 28 years. Thats almost 30. The people who
mocked and parodied my style upon its public debut online. I see their early jealousy for
what it is now. People dont tend to praise the artists that draw at the French level: The
technically and aesthetically magnificent level. In France, its all right to do everything
yourself, in terms of production positions. Its okay to be a Dave-Sim-style Force of
Nature and One Man Comics Army in France. I just bought a book: The Greater
Journey: Americans in Paris, and was reading an online chapter earlier: Genius in
Abundance.
Types of Comics Im really good at drawing:

Kung-Fu Fighting Comics

Noir Comics
World Manga

I practically wrote the book on these three genres of comics. Or more specifically, I
inspire artists who write and draw the How-To Artbooks about drawing in those styles.
Phil used to call me an Idea Man. And I am indeed an Idea Man.

Technology, anime, manga, and comic books are PROGRESS-ive, not REGRESS-ive.
Meaning they progress over time. They improve over time. Like me, they get better, not
worse like TV animation in America, which often reverts back to how it looked in the
40s.

Sunday, October 09, 2011,

Since I already draw at a professional French Level, from now on Im measuring the
quality and detail of my artwork by French publishing standards, in my own opinion, not
Japanese or American standards, in my own opinion. Americans are insecure and jealous
of my work, and the Japanese are condescending at times. Neither really suits my style,
so Im going the Moebius route.

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+
+
+
+
+
=

Todd McFarlane
Katsuhiro Otomo
French Comics
Yasuhiro Nightow
Syd Mead
Corey Jackson.
Moebius

All detailed architecture in modern media derives from Jean Moebius Giraud between
1970 and 1990 in the French Comic Book Scene. Moebius was the first, pioneering detail
guy. The first real Super-Genius Production Designer. All Detailed Production Design in
modern science fiction and fantasy film derives from him and his work, or his Production
Design. Everyone else is either imitating him, influenced by him, or following his
example unknowingly or indirectly. He influenced both Akira and Blade Runner, and all
the Tokyo anime and Hollywood and Los Angeles film and TV productions that
followed. Detailed things in animation, comics, and film might not be as, well, detail-y, if
Moebius didnt change and influence everything. And the amazing thing is he did it with
nothing more than a sketchbook and pens. Virtually all CGI or heavily realistic detailed
cyberpunk and/or steampunk and the textural wonders we see in that anime or Hollywood
production design reverts back to Moebius if we trace the root of its influence. Moebius
is to layering and detailed production design what Disney is to animation, and Tezuka is
to anime and manga.

7-Year Cycle:
Ages 28-35 (my age)
This is the time in your yearly cycle when your interests will be expanded and your
prosperity increases.
Teacher: This test says you drew a lot of water. (drawing is a small island floating on
water, which takes up half the picture) That means youre going to have a lot of money.
Me: How much money could I make?
Responder: $100 billion

Favorite Writers
John Steinbeck
Ken Wilber
Stephen King
Gao Xingjian
Yoshiyuki Tomino
Aaron McGruder

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Michael Reaves
Neil Gaiman
Kevin Smith
Quentin Tarantino
M. Night Shyamalan
Paul Dini
Bram Stoker
Jean-Paul Sartre
Nietzsche
Homer
Dante
William Shakespeare
Roger Ebert
Scott McCloud
JRR Tolkien
JK Rowling
Michael Moorcock
Robert E. Howard
Garth Ennis
Jhonen Vasquez
John Woo
George Lucas
Joseph Campbell
Jamie S. Rich
Dave Sim
Jeff Smith
My bibliography portfolio is 33 literary documents long. Some of them are books, some
of them are flimsy art books and comics, some are stapled together. You get the picture.
People to show work, bibliography portfolio pieces, and projects to:
Agents
Editors
Submissions Offices
Producers
Writers
Methods to do this: Portfolios, Novel Manuscripts, Comic Book pages, Scripts, and of
course, Cover Letters.

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Friends and Colleagues to Show My Work (Art-Writing, Projects) To, who would be
trusted and supportive:
Mom
Chris
Jean Hess
Nick Weidenfeld
WCN, Photobucket
Johnny
Phil
Lindsey
Donna
Jo Ann Cook
Creative Artists Agency (CAA)
Williams Street
Amanda

Favorite Art Movements:

Expressionism, German Expressionism
Surrealism
Surrealist Expressionism
Abstract Art (Cubism)
Avant-Garde
Cyberpunk
Steampunk
Romanticism
Noir

I need to own my own creations and ideas, which basically means I need to eventually
copyright everything I come up with on paper or on a computer. I need to copyright every
single creative idea I come up with. That is what Steve Blum recommended I do, in an
email he once wrote to me.
In Pop Culture This Week:
Real Steel is with Hugh Jackman is the number 1 grossing movie in the country.
Sailor Moon is the number 1 selling graphic novel in the country.

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Things Asia Got Right:

TV
Cinema
Animation
Comic Book Tomes
Mechanical Design
Architecture
Choreography
Action
Meditation
The Book
Realism in Art
Design
Fashion
Timing
Diplomacy

Surrealism is often merely making a composition of a canvas filled with combined

subject matters from separate physical or time-space realities. For example, a cup pouring
out water turning into a table floating in midair.

Im going to need to take some iron pills, if I actually want to have energy.
Im definitely one of the biggest scapegoats in my family and in my local and not-solocal media peer group and community. Im a lighting rod for abuse, because the people
abusing me cant handle the level of abuse I must handle every day.

Daytime Hobbies

Cable TV Watching (Cartoons)

Commentary and Journal Writing
YouTube and Gmail

A low key-lit shadowy drawing thats resulted from lots of lighting concept artis
always more cinematic than a Google homepage-like composition, which would be all
white. Shadow = Mood. Shadowy = Moody Atmosphere for Scene.
Currently in the process of developing some perspective and anatomy drawing exercises.

So I am making some money now. And the coolest part is that Ive started earning
royalties from my most popular website on my lucky day: Tuesday. Actually getting

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paid, as opposed to wishing or hoping youll one day make money, or achieving a long
cherished dream, puts a lot of fears to rest, and it makes you less insecure. I finally seem
to be doing a bit more well for myself.
Im Joe2. Joe1 made me kill your friend there. Hate Joe1 for this crime I (Joe2) have
commited, not me: Joe2, much obliged.
I fucking hate imposters.

Ahhhh. Its past 10 p.m., time to wind things down. Yet another successful and lucrative
day of broadcasting. How many successful and lucrative days is this now. Nice career.
Sweet, sweet money. So now Im getting royalty payments from my YouTube videos?
Pretty cool. I dont get paid for my really popular ones though.
Am I really the only celebrity whos squared off against the Muffin-Demon Whore
Bitches, and lived to tell about it? (farts, craps pants, and walks off). Eh, theyre not that
powerful of an enemy. And neither are the hacker TV and internet message board
saboteurs with their fancy iPads, and Adobe Photoshop artwork, and rock-em sock-em
robots either! I mean I know theyre parasitic disease-ridden empregnated dog-faces, but
I just cant seem to look away.

I felt quite tired earlier tonight. And for a bit of time, I was lying in bed, it was as though
I could feel some kind of specter, a black spirit, the angel of death hovering above me. Or
was it just fatigue. It can be hard to tell sometimes. What was I supposed to do? Just lie
there and wait for my body to die? I guess that is kind of what it felt like. I guess. Its
either lack of sleep, or the angel of death had paid me a visit. But now that I feel sort of
alive again, apparently he didnt come to collect.
As some know, Ive been a virgin my entire life. Never once had sex. None for me
thanks, Im driving. And Im 27 going on 28 years old. Never once had sex with anyone.
Im actually a bit proud of this fact. Im proud of my nonsexual purity. Sex is for
breeders. Im not one of those. Im a genius. Geniuses dont do that sort of thing.
Geniuses arent that lucky. Most geniuses are not ladies men, or even all that attractive.
If they were, they wouldnt be geniuses. Attractive women are the enemy of purity. Not
to mention masculinity.

I finally know what I want to do with my life, and my hobbies, and my education. I want
to study art in Paris, France, the art capital of the world, and train myself in traditional
painting and fine arts, such as charcoal and traditional pencil.

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Im going to interview Donna Frank at some point and interview her about studying art in
France so I can get some advice and wisdom, because shes the only artist I know
personally whos been there and done that.
I found an art school in Paris that was founded in the early Twentieth Century, and is
located close to Notre Dame. The Notre Dame, with the internationally historic and
famous Notre Dame Cathedral.
My art education will be incomplete if I dont study art in France and Paris, France for at
least a little while.
The school Im interested is called the Paris-American Academy.

This wanting to travel to Paris, France to study fine art and painting.
I want to study and improve in terms of the following:
Pen and ink and Photoshop studies (Man in Black, End Times)
Acrylic canvas sketchbook painting (Destiny Blade)
Charcoal and pencil Gray art (Madonna, Woman in Gown)

Friday, October 14, 2011,

I have French in my heritage. That probably means I see an unconventional view of
equality between the literary and the visual. Not everyone values the literary and the
visual equally, but many French, from what Ive observed seem to relish this
democratization of form and medium. Its Literature & Visual, not Literature vs. Visual!
To think otherwise just strikes me as kind of silly.
Also, I think the term auteur could definitely stand to be re-evaluated a bit, in terms of
how we use it to assess things of high aspiration, as well as visual and literary
significance. In the American film critic and animation and film appreciation community
and at times fandom, auteur is a big deal. In America, people equate auteur with the very
prestigious appearing auteur theory, and many people think you have to be established
or have status or prestige as a director or executive producer (not writer) of cinematic
and artistic film and television shows of various sorts. But when I began investigating
how the French categorize the word auteur, they seem a bit less discriminatory about it.
Primarily because in France, auteur is more a noun for author of any literary or visual
printed and/or distributed work. Any author of a literary tome is an auteur. On the
Amazon France shopping website, even just to get to the comic book section, just to find
a link to an authors work, the term author is replaced by its French counterpart, and the
subject of this discussion: Auteur! Like I was saying, in France: Auteur is Author! Its a
general term in France, not a prestige label.

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Should I be a filmmaker, a screenwriter, a novelist, or a graphic novelist? Or should I just

attempt to be all 4 of them. Im having a hard time deciding. No matter what I do, Im an
auteur of some sort, so Im not worried about having a distinctive style. Even though Im
very in tune with the aesthetic appearance of the French art, cinematic, and literary style,
where genius and auteur theory is commonplace, my style is still pretty distinctive and
unique. Its hard to fathom that Phil used to always say I didnt have a style back in the
day. Im starting to love how designy so many of my sketches look. I love my art. Its
well-designed.
You dont have to be the top guy just to be at the top. Sometimes you just need to
influence the top guy significantly or be one of his main colleagues to be on top of an
industry. For example, Moebius is incredibly influential in animation, and he hasnt even
worked in animation for the most part. Why is he still an animation God of Modern
Times? Easy. Because he had a heavy influence on Katsuhiro Otomos Akira
something Otomo himself openly seems to not at all denyboth the feature film and the
comic book it was based on: One of the most influential animations of all time. To say
nothing of Blade Runner and Moebius influence on the science-fiction work of Syd
Mead, George Lucas, and Ridley Scott as well. I dont know if Ill ever be Moebius level
influential, but I suppose I should never deny the potential to do that one day as well. The
thing I like about the influence of Moebius is its invisible, quiet, loud, and ubiquitous all
at the same time. Every detailed artist is copying Moebius, both directly and indirectly,
whether he or she knows it or not, at least in terms of science fiction. His drawings often
look quite labor intensive, quite laborious and meticulous. The labor shows through. All
the work put into a Moebius drawing is not hidden at all. It is manifested all across the
screen and page. From the Star Wars to Gundam. That look. I cant get it out of my head.
And I cant get the notion that I want to spend my share of time copying itsomething
that detailedout of my head. That design element is something I recognize as soon as I
see it. Its a mixture of geometric, architectural, and mechanical design.
You never really do run out of complex French literature to read. At first I thought Dave
Sim had a monopoly on that wordy, articulate sort of thing, and then I found French
literature like my Phenomenology, and realized how ultra-literate and ultra-prolific
French authors really are. When you get a French Genius, you get a super-ultra genius.
When you get a French Genius, you get Genius In Abundance. Like Dave Sim times 10.
Like Quentin Tarantino and John Woo times 10, perhaps even 100IF were talking
about literature. I mean I have French heritage, and look how ultra-long my literature file
is.
Eureka! Ive got it! Now I know why Ive been having so much trouble finding
inspiration for my fantasy and science-fantasy literature, books, and graphic novels. I
have the ambition, and I have the will or will power, but I dont always have the
inspiration. And inspiration can only come from reading other authors fantasy literature,
tomes, and manuscripts. It all goes back to Stephen Kings famous advice in On Writing:
If you want to write fiction, you must read a lot of fiction. But what he didnt say that he
probably should have, that Im adding here, is "reading = writing applies to virtually any

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and every fiction writing genre: Science-Fiction, Fantasy, Science-Fantasy, Pulp

Literature, Animation Screenwriting, Comic Book Writing, Action-Adventure, Intrigue.
You name it. Any genre you plan on writing in, you have to spend years reading up on
other, more prominent writers work in that same genre, even when there dont seem to be
any notable ones. In that case you read case examples and copies of books by other
writers In General, on General Principle. You cant possibly hope to master a literary
genre of any sort if you dont read any famous or even obscure works that are included in
that genre. That was the mistake I had been making. I was writingor perhaps more
accurately, attempting to writebut I wasnt readingreading works by other famous
writers, which made my writing feel a bit genre-less. How sad. But now Im going to
rectify that mistake. Im going to read every work of genre fiction, just any book and
script I can get my grubby little hands on. To succeed as a writer, you must be a
voracious reader of both the contemporaries and the classics. Period.
In a way, Im hoping for a literary auteur synthesis. I want to take the narration of certain
favorite authors (John Steinbeck, Michael Moorcock, Robert E. Howard, and Tom
Clancy), and combine it with the swashbuckling sensibilities of George Lucas and JRR
Tolkien. Something poetically descriptive in narration and metaphor, which seeks to
attain a higher level of poetic narrative, but that in some ways reads like a classic 90s
archetypal spy novel (Tom Clancy). Robert E. Howard wasnt much of a narrative master
most of the time, but he was a high level visionary.
Other influences:
Joseph Campbell
Star Wars
The Odyssey
The Godfather (Tarantino-level brutality, modern dialogue, and violence)
Soul Mountain by Gao Xingjian
All You Need is Kill (contemporary Japanese science fiction. Anime in novel form)

The feeling of knowing other people, whether many or fewtake any form of comfort or
pleasure in the things you build, write, or draw is a profoundly powerful feeling. Its an
intuitive feeling. Its like knowing somehow, somewhere, with some person, youve
provided that one person with a house to live in, a roof over their head, or some other
metaphor for the feelings we all experience when we read an entertaining document or
book, or chapter, or page someone else drew or wrote. Theres a lot of subtle influence in
an action like that, the act of giving solace or comfort to other people, wherever they are.
The greatest, most influential forms of cultural influence are always passive and delicate.
If a passive influence is doing its job, we dont in fact feel like were being forced to do
anything. You have control, you retain control and still get you want. It doesnt feel
political, or forced upon you by higher forces like authoritarian influence. Truly
inspirational influence is nearly always optional, and nearly always democratic. It is not a
tyranny or dictatorship, it is a democracy, meaning we still have some form of control.
People like control. They like Having Control, and they like Attaining and Retaining

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Control. If youre tuning into your favorite show from the past, or picking up your
favorite book in a bookstore or on your bedroom floor, and reading it, looking forward to
it of all things, perhaps even more than you look forward to seeing your own family. The
person who directlybut mostly indirectly on some levelcreated that feeling has
attained much stability and power. Hes giving his readers comfort, and comfort is rarely
forced or pushed on us. Thats why we like it. The cool thing about my YouTube
pages audience is: Its a real audience. Real people are tuning in. Real people really
actually want to watch my videos and tune in every day, just like they do for real TV.
Only difference: Its on the internet. Either way, it is solid viewership and people are
entertained in large numbers. That feeling is one of the most satisfying, and one I rarely,
if ever, experienced in my early youth, perhaps not even in my adolescence either. It
didnt happen until early adulthood.

Saturday, October 15, 2011,

One of my career ambitions is to become the William Shakespeare of animation writing.
Every good writer aspires to be Shakespeare at some point. Hes the ultimate example of
a prolific literary genius. Plenty of screenwriters study Shakespeare. Shakespeare was a
bit of a playwright himself. He was kind of a screenwriter before screenwriting existed.
He was a master of scene description and dialogue. Shakespeare wrote the ultimate
literary dialogue. George Lucas and Yoshiyuki Tomino are the Shakespeares of science
fiction screenwriting.
What do you get when you combine JRR Tolkien with William Shakespeare and Homer?
I dont know, but whatever that combination would manifest, it must be pretty good.
Upon reading The Greater Journey: Americans in Paris by Pulitzer-recipient David
McCullough, I find I cant seem to stop reading that book now that Ive started. Ive kept
it to one or two chapters a day, but I actually wish I could read a lot more from the book
than that. Those first sixty pages go by in a flash. Never have I been so enthralled by a
world history book, or a book of Parisian emphasis quite like this. I probably never would
have found entertainment and value in a book as mature as The Greater Journey had I
started reading its chapters at a less experienced age.
Elements of Fiction Writing:
Dialogue
Vocabulary (twenty dollar words)
Narrative Description (poetic metaphor)
Ultimate Forms of Narrative Storytelling:
Animation Script
Storyboard
Comic Book Script

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Sequential Art Page

One of the Secrets of quality writing is you have to practice writing in your journal
every day. Its a way of flexing your linguistic and literary muscles.
Drawing should also be practiced often as well. I dont know about every day though.
More like every week or month, unless you have hyper energy.
I spent much of my infant life in Ann Arbor, Michigan and Kankakee, Illinois. And spent
my later youth and adolescence in Casselberry and Fort Lauderdale, Florida. When and if
I attain money in my later adulthood, I plan on heading out West to the states near
California, and/or returning to Ann Arbor Michigan, where I might just cross the boarder
to Canada, where Id hope to visit Toronto, Montreal, and Quebec for a little while. And
later on around that time, I also feel I need to eventually cross the Atlantic to visit Asia
and Europe, or Eurasia, for a while, first as a tourist, and then perhaps later, as a citizen,
where I might spend my time primarily in the England and Paris, France, studying art,
cinema, and literature internationally. Im hoping to do a lot of international traveling in
my later years, where I hope to study and pursue research and a career as an international
graphic novelist, novelist, and screenwriter, whether locally or internationally, or both.
My adulthood looks to be quite the adventure if I succeed in these aspirations. Then Id
return home to the United States after a few years or months, and perhaps relocate again,
this time to Los Angeles, California to pursue work in Hollywood and television as an
animation and action screenwriter. Wow. Thats a lot of travel mileage. Must be a
reaction to being cooped up in my Central Florida bedroom for too long. I just decided I
must attain national prominence and international credibility in my work before I die.
And theres no better way to attain international credit than by becoming an international
citizen. I like history and travel. That book, The Greater Journey may very well have
changed my life and altered my worldview. Its an amazingly exciting historical portrait
of the Parisian way of life and culture from an American expatriate perspective in the
1830s. Ive never read anything like it. Its so enlightening. Its enlightening me as to just
how much I like European world literature. Even if its from a American-foreigners
perspective.
Discovering French comics has had such a powerful influence and impact on me that its
caused me to do an entire re-evaluation of what I want the final look and binding of my
comic series, End Times, to be. I dont think I want a phonebook stack anymore. Id
much prefer to publish my comics as thin 20-200 page hardcover tomes, or volumes.
Mini-volumes. Twice the quality and detail as my previous look, and half the time to read
it. Not every graphic novel needs to be fat, bloated, and massively labyrinthine the way
Bones and Blankets trades are. Looking back, it actually even feels a bit excessive to
me. It seems like overkill wanting to do it that way, in some ways. A massive binding
wont hide your mistakes, or crude artwork, if you artwork is crude. And my art is indeed
crude at certain times. Not all the time, but sometimes, and I need to watch that. Actually,
it would probably call more attention to them than would be desired. Plus, I think Ive
finally learned that though quantity is important too, it is about quality, not quantity.

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Fiction writing, screenwriting, and literature all seem to be on the rise in popularity with
younger male readers in Japan. There are more Japanese novels being released in the
United States than any time before, with things like light novels based on anime, and
fantasy and science fiction novels such as Brave Story and All You Need Is Kill. And
famous Japanese scriptwriter Dai Satowho started writing professionally at the age of
19starting his screenwriter consulting company StoryRiders as recently as 2007. Never
has the Japanese love for literature and the printed word been so strong collectively. I
cant wait to see how this develops in the future.
What I offer is unique. Southeast Asia, for much of its cinema, offers a primarily visual
interpretation of the choreographed martial art genre. Writing simply They fight and
then handing your film over to a choreographic fight scene director has definitely worked
above and beyond the call of duty in Asia and America now. But writers like Quentin
Tarantino and the Nickelodeon Avatar Team and Bruce Timms DC division inspire us to
take the literary representation of visual and literary martial arts and fighting one step
or in my auteur style case, many stepsfurther. Im a big fan of sitting down and vividly,
narrativelyand perhaps even metaphorically and poeticallydescribing the action in a
narrative, and story outline context. Books written on Hong-Kong cinema and Asian
choreography like the ones I read, and scripts like Star Wars, Crouching Tiger, and Kill
Bill all offer a literary interpretation of all that frantic action on screen action we love so
much. Im building a new form of narration entirely: Choreographic Narratology and
Literary Novelization. In a way, its combining the best of East and West. Eastern
Rhythm and Motion, and Western Description, which America and Europe are famous
for.
While script quality is very important to me, storyboard quality is almost equally so.
Storyboards are a big deal in comics and animation the world over, in pretty much any
country animation is made in, ever since Walt Disney animation studios invented it.
Storyboards are the invisible art, heavily labored, yet paradoxically invisible and unseen
to nearly all viewers with the exception of people who see published storyboards on the
internet and in books.
Storyboards Establish The Following:
Storytelling
Time
Pacing
Timing
Motion
Camera and Cinematography
Choreography
(Camera) Angles and Shots
Editing
Cutting
Lighting and Shadow

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Composition, or Mise En Scene.

Not to go on endlessly about it as though I were writing an entire book or essay about it,
but Paris, France has everything I like on some level:

People who think and draw and write like I do

Architecture thats old and big
Notre Dame Cathedral
The Louvre
History
French Cuisine
Phenomenology
Ontology
Perspective
Comics with perspective and architecture
Anime and Manga
Auteur Theory, Visual Stylists
Franime
Romanticism
Numerous Nobel and Pulitzer Prize winning
French cinema
Fine Art

I need to return to drawing bigger. My old portfolio is so big. Those pieces, in charcoal,
pencil, and paint, are HUGE! Damn. Theyre mostlyat least3 to 4 feet in height, if
not bigger. I destroyed a lot of my old sketchbook art, though I did keep a lot of it.
Elements to focus on:

Anatomy
Drapery
Light and Shade Studies/Illustrations
Inking and pencilling
Paint and Color
Perspective
3-D shade carving (Rima Jabbur technique)

My best drawings all have a relaxed feeling to them. Some of my better drawings are
good, but their linework and texture is a bit stiff. With my best work, I can sense it. I can
literally feel the looseness of the linework, and the relaxation of my arm drawing those to
this day, even when I drew some of them over 8 years ago.
Life:

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Art phases, there was

the Phil period

the Portfolio Period
the Art Institute of Fort Lauderdale Period
The DeviantART Period
The Webcomics Nation Period
The Donna Frank Period
and theres where Im currently at now.

Writing:

The High School Journal-Essay Period

The Celebrity Atheists Period
My Sunrise Hall Period
the Psyche Ward Period
The Manifesto Period
the Cartoon Network Adult Swim (and) Blog Web 2.0 Period

Oh would you look at that. Turns out Eurotrash isnt so trashy after all. More like
Eurogold. America WISHES it had choreographers as cinematic as those in Eurasia.
Im the Ub Iwerks of action movie concept artists. And Mono Jubei is the noir-version
Mickey Mouse of action movies and comics. Hes a universally appealing character who
people react to as if hes theyre best friend. Mono is relatable. Hes neither a complete
sociopath or a complete pansy. The truth lies somewhere in the middle, the gray areas.
Mono is noir science fiction, and Mono is sword and sorcery fantasy. Mono is ancient
warrior samurai swordsman, and Mono is spaghetti Western covert-ops paramilitary
gunslinger. He is neither the Left nor the Right, but somewhere in between.
Dai Sato in a recent online interview once said, on average, it takes him 3 months to
finish one episode of script for a TV series, and when hes working hes punching hours
around the clock, 24/7. Maybe if I really sit down and focus I really can write an episode
in a few months.
What I Truly Am So Far:

A nonfiction author
A multimedia concept artist
A broadcaster
A narrative choreographer

Of nothing else I can be certain

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All of the fictional stories in TV, movies, music, animation, comics, anime, manga, and
French and Chinese storytelling, in some way loosely based on or inspired by the folklore
and folk biography of my life form a pretty good public picture of me. Though not all of
it is pretty, for the most part it paints a human picture of a protagonist coming of age in
an uncertain and often chaotic world of indifference, depravity, hostility, rejection,
poverty, and danger.

Script (a sense of story, image, and dialogue) / Story, Writing

Storyboard (a sense of storytelling and composition) / Camerawork, Motion
Art Direction / Production Design (a sense of place) / Backgrounds
Ive accumulated a portfolio of non-professional practice work in all three of these preproduction areas.
So now, in the year 2011, Ive begun the journey of perfecting my Triple Threat. The
Trigram of Pre-Production. Ive started work in all three main storytelling areas. I grew
up wanting to be a multimedia storyteller. Now I am, in 3 separate fields. This area of
triple emphasis on design and storytelling was partially initially inspired by my
Production Art Book I own about Oban Star-Racers, featuring the world famous work of
Thomas Romain and Savin-Yeatman Eiffel, who both set the paradigm for Triple Area
Emphasis and Focus. Triple Area Pre-Production work could very well become
commonplace one day if my style ever becomes normalized.
Now I have work carved out for me in a triple-position as a screenwriter, storyboarder,
and production designer.

If you really want to get super-technical, Im a literary cinema visualist.

On the Writing Chores Side is:

Outline
Screenplay

On the Art Chores Side is:

Concept and Character Design Artist

Production Designer
Storyboard Artist

I am responsible for the initial vision, or blueprints of all of these areas.

Ive gotten a lot better at art. Ive improved quite a bit since my childhood. Id certainly
hope so.

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I learned to paint fine art, initially, by studying and copying the Romantic works of
French Master Eugene Delacroix. My early sketch-notes were filled with Prismacolor
pencil studies of various Masterworks found in the art book: Eugene Delacroix: Prince of
Romanticsm. I emulated Delacroixs chromatic textures and none-outline-ish linework
quite a bit. That is how I learned to draw realistically with, with a pencil, and later with
charcoal and a paintbrush.
I learned to write by studying Stephen King and copying from his literary style. And later
I studied the existentialist book Being & Nothingness by Jean-Paul Sartre, and the journal
entry book One Taste: Daily Reflections on Integral Spirituality by Ken Wilber, the latter
of which I discovered on the Great Thinkers and Visionaries website on the internet.
Ken Wilber was one of the main philosophers listed. I read them first to improve my
vocabulary, then for my linguistic sentence-paragraph structure and syntax. I would
emulate their writing in my early journals a lot. Every other author in my study, who
followed, for the most part, was of secondary importance in my consciousness. I wrote a
lot more than I read in my adolescence, by at least a 70-to-30 Ratio.
Writing fiction becomes easier over time if you just stick with it. Narrating fiction in
stories and scripts boils down, essentially, to using poetic metaphors and verbs in your
sentences. Simple, right?

Now that I have starter spec work done in all major areas of animation production, Im
setting my newest goal. Now that Ive got all the initial writing and visuals on paper, Im
honing my craft and refining my goals for the next 5 to 10 years even further, from
20122020 or so. All I have to do is keep finishing thumbnails and panel compositions
for future storyboards, and keep screenwriting more outlines and script pages with
dialogue and narration (verbs, dialogue, metaphors). Now that Ive started, I just keep
adding onto it and structuring it and refining and improving and developing it until I can
get actual real work. Sales dont matter. Even if I never sell it, Im still looking forward
to keeping the manuscript in storage in my bedroom for good measure. So I can thumb
through it and read it over and over again the way I do Manifesto. So in other words, I
dont need to start anything. Everything is already started with the exception of my first
and later episode script first draft.
MY opinion on the matter? Unfortunately, due to my increase in popularity on pop
culture and entertainment in the last few years, EVERYONE wants to hear MY opinion
on the matter nowadays. Which is why I guess I gotta use that particular area of
influence sparingly, even in places like here, whether I want to or not. Gone are the days

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of being able to talk about exactly what I want to, whenever I want to. Theres still
freedom of speech for me. Just not as much.
My brother Andrew does get one thing in his life right, for starters. First of all, he doesnt
use the internet. Smart idea. And second of all, he thinks anyone who uses the internet is
a lifeless, nerdish shut-in loser, not worthy of wasting his time on them. Thats actually a
pretty good idea. Maybe I should just follow his philosophy and forego the web and
most, if not all website, permanently. I bother to take the time (often getting punished by
fellow internet users for doing such things). Hen never wastes his time with computers to
begin with. Thats a good idea. Maybe I should do that too. To my older brother who
doesnt really give a shit about technology: Computers = losers, no matter what. I think
hes onto something there.
Apparently, my parents dont want me to get a raise in my health care payments. Theyve
been withholding that information from me. The people from the government who called
them on the phone even told them We want to see if hes eligible for more money. My
parents kept that information a secret from me (going so far as to call it bullshit in a
separate conversation I overheard my Mom talking about, where she was talking about
me while not mentioning my name, like everyone else does as well.).

Ah, another day, another page of writing or two. Or three.

All the writing and art I do should indeed be compartmentalized in its development. But
it also needs to be integrated into a cohesive unit, or whole, at some point.

The three double-elements of storytelling:

STORY
DEVELOPMENT OF A NARRATIVE STORYTELLING SYSTEM
BeginningMiddleEnd
Inciting Incident (Setup)Conflict (Confrontation)Resolution (Solution)
Questions to ask:
BEGINNING, MIDDLE & END

(BEGINNING, MIDDLE, END) How do these three segmented parts-elements

relate to the supporting cast of characters-&-villains?
(BEGINNING, MIDDLE, END) How is the setup-inciting incident, conflictconfrontation, and resolution solved for each major character-player of the
narrative?

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(BEGINNING, MIDDLE, END)What do we know about the characters/world at

the beginning, middle, and end of the story as it relates to the beginnings (setup),
middles (conflict), and ends (resolution) essential elements. In other words, how
does each character interact with and influence the beginning, middle, and end of
the story.
BEGINNING

(BEGINNING): When does the inciting incident really happen? When does it
start and end? Can there be more than one inciting incident at the beginning?
MIDDLE

(MIDDLE; CONFRONTATION; CONFLICT) What kind of buildup and rising

action or tension helps get us through the storys narrative? Whats causing the
suspense and drama? How does the confrontation define that suspense and
drama?
(MIDDLE): What is the nature of the conflict-confrontation? Nature, Society, or
Supernatural/Scientific? What is the Conflict, and who/whats causing it?
(MIDDLE): CONFLICT: Who/what is leading/causing/instigating the
conflict/tension/events of the story? Character action or the situation/events?
END

(END) Where does this element/segment/act/final scenes truly begin/end? And

with who, which characters, one or more?
(END): How is the story problem-confrontation completely resolved-concludedsolved?
(END) Is there an emotional-psychological resolution too for the audience-&characters, or is it just physical-temporal?
I love, love poetically metaphorical fiction, especially novels that go overboard with it,
the same way I love heavy linguistics or the novelization of choreography on the page
visually and literarily. Steinbecks The Grapes of Wrath is metaphor porn; just a whole
lot of poetic and metaphor-centric narration. I couldnt help but notice that high fantasy
often doesnt use a lot of metaphors in its description. I guess thats my job to fill in the
blanks. Ive already started keeping a little archive for it, a Metaphor section in my
regular PCs Microsoft Word program. I just think thats a cool idea: Poetically
describing realms, worlds, and characters and actions of pure imagination.
All good creative work takes concentration and focus, or concerted effort. Every detail on
a page and composition must be the center of attention.
My favorite engineer has to be Tim Berners-Lee. He influenced my way of thinking and
business philosophya man that defines egolessness and humility, never demanding
credit. His invention, the World Wide Web became so influential. He influenced so
much, turned plenty of other people into millionaires, but not himself. Hes a True Sacred

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Giver, and yet he never made much if any money from the web or anything on the
internet for a long time, and yet he never shouted from the heavens how powerful or
influential he was, even though he created the web. I feel like I have a lot in common
with someone who has that kind of humility, because I too created influential things and
hardly anyone knows about it, like streaming anime online and Mono Jubei, for starters.
Tim Berners-Lee exemplifies what it truly means to be a technological engineer.
When the whole worlds gone evil, its not exactly a realistic goal to still expect to be
held in high regard. Actually when the world goes evil, the opposite of that scenario
happens. In an evil world, almost all good things get shit on by brainwashed sheep,
indoctrinated by public mainstream media Right Wing and Left Wing propaganda.

Took a lot of patience, and tested my patience and safety levels a lot, but thankfully, I
dont think my parents are trying to make me go outside as much. Not when people want
to set me up, hurt and/or kill me, whether in traffic or downtown Seminole County, which
is essentially what Ive been saying all along, much to my parents dismissal and denial of
said actions by said sick, twisted individuals. I still see black crows outside when I go out
to downtown Casselberry, but not as many. I think my parents, not counting doctors and
dentists appointments have given up on the force him outdoors plot.
With the way my body is deteriorating due to the high functioning level of my mindbrain, Ill be lucky to see the age of 55 to 60 at the latest, if I dont die a lot sooner.

If I really do make it through 26 episodes of scripts2 of which Ive already written first
draft outline lists forIm not sure if Im really going to be able to get myself to stop
writing scripts for End Times, if I reach episode 26 or higher. Maybe I should do more
than 26 episodes. Tough to say. I suppose I could always save the post-Episode-26 scripts
for a prequel or sequel series. And if its a comic I could just extenuate the length of the
trade.
Living in America is so horrible. It cant be any worse overseas. Not when you compare
living overseas to the way Im treated here as a minority and rare person in America. Im
this close to being through with America altogether, quietly leaving one day, and never
coming back, whether by boat or by plane. I dont care. They both help you reach the
same destination. America is Bullshit. I hate it here. Im so miserable and depressed
about having to deal with this neighborhood and parents. The way people treat me is
unfair and without compassion, love, or consideration. Always with the criticism with
these people. And Im getting more than a little sick of it. Im not joking at all. Ive
already flown once when I was young. I can do it again. Flying is a small price to pay for
the reward of living abroad. I know people arent any nastier to me overseas than they are
toward me here and now. That is my number 1 reason for leaving. The thing is, I am
important, and I dont get treated like royalty. People treat me like shit, and the best way
to protest is to leave and never come back for the rest of your life. Silent protest. Better
than holding a picket sign.

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Money talk: So far, currently, I have a total of $240 in one bank account, but its going to
need to be transferred to my debit. If Im going to gain venture capital, I need to do it
with my own property, NOT the bank account thats co-signed by my adoptive father
whos terrible with money even when hes been working his entire life.

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Friday, October 21, 2011,

I made my first End Times creative project submission ever, to a French company,
France Film, primarily because I love anime-influenced French animation, and it seemed
easier than submitting my materials to a Los Angeles or Tokyo based company.
Legendary Pictures, the film and comic book distributor, seems like the perfect choice if
I ever finish a screenplay or comic manuscript. They did Sucker Punch, The Dark Knight,
Ninja Assassin, and Inception, all blockbusters. They also publish comic books by Paul
Pope and Frank Miller: Two of my favorites.
I like France Films co-pro friendly philosophy. Plus they pay filmmakers up to as much
as $5 million for individual projects. So there is the possibility of becoming rich if they
do buy one of your ideas and develop it, which in some ways is similar to the
submissions process of Adult Swim. Getting a green light from either or would be fine
with me.
I know almost any written word thats written in America as tor or thor as a form of
title, is written as teur in France. Auteur, Createur
Apparently my enthusiasm for French art and culture is more than a little contagious.
Considering that I might just one day get the chance to do business with France, I think
thats probably a good thing.
Man, I really want to buy or pre-order that Mass Effect Universe art book. Only $25.
Okay, Ive gone way beyond just knowing about Herge and Moebius now. I know all
about France, and love every last detail. The French really know textures, line weight,
cinematography, lighting, perspective, and color.
Line-Producer
Writer
Character Design
Concept Design
But how can I sell these particular skills to Film France? And which of these skills would
they most prefer to draw from and use in their animation, if they DO like my show
concept? In a way, as a foreigner entrepreneur, createur, storyteller dabbling in
international co-production deal making and negotiation, these are important things to
consider.

Friday, October 21, 2011

Now that I think about it, I cant really function properly without an overabundance of
wealth. Not having any money has severely crippled and disabled me.

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There is room for sloppy, imperfect, flawed, ugly, not so good, and unappealing
drawings:
Gestures
Thumbs
Thumbnail sketches
Sketches
Free form drawings
Abstract art
Expressionism
This form of drawing need not be looked down upon. I know some do look down at it,
but that is very wrong. An artist needs to love all his work equally. You cant measure
yourself by your best drawings. Youll eventually kill yourself if you do that. Youll just
depress yourself and get yourself really depressed. Measure yourself by the worst of what
you can do, not the best. Pride yourself on the mediocre, not the masterful, because the
mediocre has staying power. You WILL produce more bad drawings than good. All
artists do. The only way to do more strong art, on drawings is by doing more ugly, off
drawings of all sorts, of all line qualities, of all sloppiness, and of all shapes and sizes.
Tim Burton and Pablo Picasso set the standard of the perfection that visionary art of this
sort has the potential for. All you really have to do is find the right international
collaborators, and the right production designer(s) and concept artist(s), if at all possible.
Tim Burton has Bo Welch.

How to erase an ink drawing digitally.

Ink cleanup and revision strategy.
1.
2.
3.
4.
5.
6.
7.
8.
9.
1.

Draw a full drawing as clean as possible, finish the sketch.

Identify the problem areas (lines and forms that are off or ugly)
Scan the first draft into the computer, save the file.
Open the file with my favorite digital ink and paint program.
Turn paper upside down. Go back with pen over original sketch and circle
problem areas
Erase circled areas with digital computer program
Print out new version
Redraw erased and deleted areas with same pen on printout
(repeat steps 3-8 until drawing is at satisfactory level)
Presto Chango: Polished, Clean Art!

Webcomics and Print-on-Demand publishing takes patience. And lot of practice. Chances
are you wont look that good during your first generation of uploads. It takes some
getting used to.

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Sunday, October 23, 2011,

Im starting to publish heroic fantasy fiction from the Mono universe on my
webcomicsnation.com account. WCN is the closest thing I have other than Lulu to a
mainstream illustrated fiction publishing outlet.
The Jim Pursuit might be a good piece to publish. As would the fight sequences. But
theyre going to need as much, if not more motivation and buildup to the action
sequences. There has to be a reason for it happening other than just the Apocalypse
happening.
I really dont know if actually knowing my biological parents in real life would help or
hurt me.
I do in a way live the life of a hermit: The only people I interact with are my mother,
father, brother, and nephew. People who visit every so often include Andrews wife,
certain neighbors, and every so often Im forced out of the house to visit medical
specialists who obsessively accuse me of having disturbing problems, with little
justification or proof I need such treatment in reality.
People I have yet to hear from:

Suits
Lulu
J Manley (WCN)
Lulu staff
Adsense staff

With my writing, I definitely wouldnt say Im competing to be popular. I question

whether or not teenagers or young people for that matter, study, create, or even read
traditional fiction the way they DEVOUR art, animation, and comics online. Writing is a
primarily masculine activity. I think its harder for females, especially young ones, to
relate to literature as easily, as it seems to have more to do with the left brain. Ive always
been at home with words. Writing doesnt scare me and make me nervous and give me
anxiety the way art does. The two halves of creative storytelling are worlds apart. Gender
does play a factor in how creative entertainment is marketed. Thats for certain. High art
often kind of feels like a boys club for creative visionaries and geniuses.

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I have a few chapter pieces written:

History of New Earth

Boating and Sailing
Office Confrontation
Jim Shadowing
Crime Forensics Time with Mono and Jen
Framed
Monsters invade the house
Martial Arts Narrative

This is all from 2011. Im looking forward to how Im going to expand on my literary
material in 2012.
Success and reaching your peakas they say in showbusinessis all about closure
and completion. You wont get anywhere unless you get to the point in your narrative
where youre able to writeand do writeThe End. A Script, Novel, Series Bible,
prototype, and Comics Manuscript cannot be promoted or distributed to an audience that
pays for it if a completed prototype is not draw or writtensimple as that. Within my late
20s and early 30s, sometime within that period, other than being a world traveler, I hope
to have one of my projects 1st draft completed, either a TV show pilot script or comic. Ill
worry about the novel or YouTube level tech contribution later.
Current mood: Restless and tired. Feeling like I want to do everything and finish
everything, and yet not having the actual energy to get much of anything done, in reality.
Feeling a mixture of incapacitation and a heavy need for sleep and rest.
Monday, October 24, 2011,
Well, its been 3 days or so, and by now France Film has written back to me! They want
to know more about my pitch! This is so exciting! So far they havent exactly rejected
me, and want to know more about my project.
This is your territory. Are you ready to DEFEND it???
I have a vision of worldwide international comics and animation I want to build, and keep
building until I see it out there. But first I must learn how to build the individual comic
book page, the individual script page and the individual comic book page of narration. I
have enough conceptual art to last me a while, if a studio in France of some variety wants
to see it. Once you have the prototypical page established, youre always working to copy
that initial archetype or prototype page in your head and then on paper in a repeat
performance over and over again.
I sometimes wish I could live in New-Earth, just like I wish I could live in Paris, France,
except France is a real ambition, and New-Earth is in my minds eye. I dont have any
friends besides Chris anymore. The rest, I dont even know what happened to them.

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Theyre gone I guess. I have fond memories of many of them, but who knows if Ill ever
see them again.
People respect international people more than they respect Americans. Beneath the
surface anyway. Its like entering a different world, because in a way, it is a different
world. Im not an expert on European animation co-productionsyet.
Areas to work on in 2012:

Writing Novel, Finishing Novel, Print-on-Demand Publishing, Agent Queries

Writing a comic book script, Drawing 1 page of comics and adding on to it
Writing a completed 22-page Script, TV Pilot for Franco-American Crew

Years to begin work in these areas

Manuscript (Word) PDF,

Pilot Script (CeltX),
Comic Book Issue PDF

2011 (tail end)

2012 (28 years old)
2013 (29 years old)
2014 (30 years old)
2015 (31 years old)
2016 (32 years old)
2017 (33 years old)
2018 (34 yrs. old)
2019 (35)
2020 (36)

But every medium I work in, is for End Times.

For Example:

Mono Pilot
Mono Comic
Mono Novel

Two pictorial and visual mediums, and one linguistic, literary one.

Technically, in terms of Mono and the New-Earth Timeline, Im both developing and
working on an animated series pilot script, a novel, and a graphic novel, simultaneously

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all at the same time. Thats 3 projects Im working on, all at the same time. This fact
alone, once I make some headway, may pay off for me and my career in the long run.
My Literary Series Tome Bible is exactly as it should be: It contains comics, a novelized
outline, and a numerous script snippets. None of them are finishedor perfect for that
matterbut the important part is I made the attempt and have continued work on them. I
wont stop working on them until I at least have a Star Wars level first draft done for at
least one, if not all three of those mediums. I tend to shift between mediums like a lizard
shifts the color of its skin. And I like it that way.
Franchises:
End Times (Comic, Novel, TV Show)
Oliver-E (Comic, Novel, TV Show)
Dream Lords (Feature Film Trilogy Series)

Some of my strongest areas are literary narration, screenwriting,

design, and atmosphere. My weakest, least productive area is
sequential art: All Talk and No Sequential Art makes Joe a dull
boy.

Studies in light, shadow, cinema, and drama: Hint: Theyre all linked.
Romanticism paintings and pencil drawings can go so far as to look like an individual
frame from a Hollywood movie. Frames from anime reels can look that way too. The best
paintings and illustrations look like pauses from an anime or Hollywood DVD. This is
the Rembrandt school of art.
New Genre:
Noir-Expressionism chiaroscuro
Noir chiaroscuro

I have a strong literary foundation in linguistics, script formatting, poetry, philosophy,

English, nonfiction writing, creative writing, genre theory, and story structure.

Most manga is semiliterate at best, and anti-literate at worst, with rare exceptions like
Gundam, Naoki Urasawas Monster, Masamunes Ghost in the Shell, Tezuka works, and
Otomo works. The majority of it is one long visual narrative exposition and essay on
cinematic effects shots as composed through time and space, and fighting or combat
compositions. If you have action but no story, whats the point? If youre going to have
action with no story, you dont Deserve to be compared to the likes of action auteurs such
as George Lucas, Quentin Tarantino, and John Woo. Easterners generally arent very

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comfortable writing about religious, supernatural and sacred topics like God, The
Apocalypse, Satan, Religion, Angels, Devils, Heaven, Paradise, Purgatory, and Hell.
Western authors are all too comfortable writing about these and have been writing about
them through much of history. Throughout most of the Nineteenth and Twentieth
Centuries authors in Southeast Asian countries never wrote about such countries.
Religion wasnt really sullied on a wide scale until the 9-11 and pedophile priest scandals
and travesties, of the Twenty-First Century. The 2000s. The New Millenium. This newly
discovered visceral assault on theism in the media and crime headlines, discussed openly
and widely by both the religious and secular, has turned into a serious contemporary
group of social issues. The assault on religion. The Fall of Faith.

To many artists and viewers, the level and quality of an artists stories and artwork is a
reflection of the artist as a person.
And at some point, you have to ask yourself, which joy is greater:
Is it the joy of working, or the joy of not working?
Which pain is greater?
Is it the pain of working, or the pain of not working?
Viewers dont judge your art by its process. They judge it by its finished product.
Plenty of normal people are artists. Thats the problem with art. Everyone assumes you
have to be superhuman or a genius just to be an artist. Most geniuses dont draw.
I approach art from a spiritual level, an intellectual one, a narrative one, and a cinematic
one. But is this reflected in the art Ive made so far?
Ive always wanted to write something big in scale, intense, and cine-dramatic, but I have
especially always wanted to write something weirdweird fiction with supernatural
themes of some sort, whether religious or scientifically fictional. Something dynamic,
compelling, and otherworldly all at the same time!
In sketchbook world, there are two main kinds of drawings:

Great and ambitious art thats left unfinished

And bad or mediocre and ugly art thats complete

And there is no pretending to draw badly in art. Whatever you put out there is your real
skill level. You either do draw well or you dont, but even if you dont, as long as you
work hard youll probably get better.

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Friday, October 28, 2011,

Far as I can tell, there are 2 different kinds of comics in this world: The comics I own in
my collection, and all the rest. And there 2 different kinds of shows on TV, the ones I
own on DVD or want to buy on DVD, or the ones on my DVR, and all the rest, which for
the most part suck out loud.
Saturday, October 29, 2011,
I finished the first draft of the Parallax series literary bible today. All the pages are binded
together into one cohesive document of pages
I have:

Main Character Model Sheets

Secondary Character Model Sheets
A Description of the Series World
Episode Taglines and Premises
Story Arc Premises
Outlines (Novelization of Plot)
Script Samples
Comics-Boards
Conceptual Art Image Boards
Production Design

I think I actually went into overkill a bit. But considering its a concept for a large scale
project, that probably isnt necessarily a bad thing.
Ive finished 1st Drafts of many things.
I have a 1st Draft Manuscript for:
A Nonfiction Book
An Animated Series
A Comic Book
The only thing thats missing is a screenplay for a feature film, but Im sure Ill write that
trilogy one of these days. In the meantime Im officially a screenwriter. No longer am I
just a wannabe screenwriter (2/03/10). I am a screenwriter now (10/29/11). It took
roughly about 2 years to train myself to become a decent screenwriter, but was well
worth the effort. Now I can write scripts like its nobodys business. I can write a truly
killer script now, and lots of them. It doesnt overwhelm me like my art did.

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There really isnt an area of animation production that I want to break into that I havent
invested some initial time and work into. Ive started work in all major pre-production
areas in my style
I must have the worst case of diarrhea-based-hemorrhoids in the worldProfoundly
painful. One of the biggest discomforts Ive ever hadyet. Its like someones shoving a
metal spike up my ass and making blood come out of my anus, every time I take a crap,
which is all the time.
Truth is, making an animated series or comic book literary-&-visual bible is a lot easier
to finish when youre not pursuing the attainment of a technology patent on the side,
which is in fact what I was doing at one point. Now that Im done with the patent, its
back to full time work developing my series concept. And working harder on my main
project than in the past is a lot easier now that Im not distracted by multiple careers, even
if doing multiple aspects of pre-production technically already is a multiple career. Doing
just about anything is 10x easier when its the only thing youre doing. Though I cant
really share much info about the series bible, I can at least state publicly that Im working
on something, even if that is like giving competitors too much information that they
could potentially use to not play nice OR fairly, which I know they will. But as long as I
keep working hard, there really isnt much they can do to get in the way of me doing
what I want to do professionally. Its not that easy to stop me (from working on projects).
Im not counting on selling anything at this moment in time. Honestly I just like working.

What is ripping? Ripping is kind of like scanning paper, except its a software scanning
video data stored on a disc, and converting the raw data into a digital computer filed,
which is accessible by computer. It also helps to have video compression software, for
helping storage space for video take up less room on you hard drive.
Windows Media Center is similar to Windows Media Player, but different. You can
watch live TV in Windows Media Center, and record the live TV youre watching,
assuming the signal works, and you can also author that recorded TV to a DVD, much
like what a DVD-Recorder does with DVD-R and DVD-RW Discs.
There are 2 kinds of HDMI transfer peripherals for using your TV screen as a
secondary computer monitor. I call it PC-TV. You can transfer the video signal by chord,
or go wireless with a wireless HDMI device and a remote signal.
The Windows Media Player Playlist and List Pane options are for automatic playback
of either songs and mp3s or Windows Media Video files.
In the future, ripping might just be compatible with DVR boxes, or at the very least, a
DVR hard drive interface function

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Theres also the Simulcasting Function, much like Cartoon Network Video and One
Piece
And then theres
Netflix Instant
YouTube
Roku
Hulu
Hulu Plus
Veoh
CW4Kids.com
Toonzaki
Funimation.com
CrunchyRoll
Pandora
Limewire
iTunes
Manga Video Online
Cartoon Network Video
Adult Swim Video
Adult Swim Gold
ANN Video
Plenty of legal stuff out there.
Well, Ive reached the creative version of Buddhist Enlightenment. Ive finished the first
draft of my very first presentation; my very first animated series bible. No small
achievement, and it took no small amount of work to get here.
But Ill say this about creating series literary and visual bibles for TV shows, doing the
essential work, and building the groundwork for your shows foundation is no easy task.
It takes a lot of courage, tenacity, hard work, perseverance, and the ability to never give
up and maintain a positive attitude, both online and off. Not everyone will befriend or
encourage you along the way, many will attempt to discourage you, sometimes even
cyberbully you, and the hours spent developing the groundwork for the material are
mostly thankless and lonely, and you wont get much feedback if any if youre going
solo. Some will even try to distract you or win your affection by keeping in step with you
and how they perceive you to be. This is, again, where tenacity and perseverance comes
in. But if you can make it past the hurdles of getting started and not quitting along the
way, once you reach the end product, you will find the rewards are great, and you
probably wont feel as threatened once you reach your actual real destination, the place
you were meant to be. You will find much less resistance at the top than at the bottom,
and therefore doing the worldthe results completing your journey brings outmake it
worth the Journey, even when its middle and beginning are filled with a perilous,
hazardous adventure, which they are.

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Sunday, October 30, 2011,

My series bible presentation iswell, presentable. Even though its so far only a first
draft, it would still be perfect to show to a producer in Los Angeles, Paris, or Atlanta at
some point in the future.
A comic book isnt a comic book, and a manga isnt a manga, if they arent filmed, shot,
edited, choreographed, directed, lit and shaded, staged, and composed like a film or TV
dramatic action storyboard. Im more storyboard artist than comic book artist or
cartoonist. Blade of the Immortal, Evangelion, Trigun, Spawn, Priest, Cerebus, and Akira
all make for great storyboard reference material.
Im not sure whether I should move to Los Angeles, or just visit on a business trip. Either
way Id love to see Los Angeles, California someday, especially if its for business.
Monday, October 31, 2011,
I do like living in Florida during the winter. The weather, community, and landscapes in
the local Central Florida scene is so beautiful. I guess in a way I am an ambassador to
Florida without even knowing thats what I was up to till this point. Tourists I dont
mind. Some Floridians mind the tourists, but I dont mind Florida tourists at all.
Everyone goes to Florida for the tourism. Winter weather in Florida is refreshing. For a
state thats often so hot in the summer, its nice to see Florida like this during the
Holidays. Local Holiday events like Thanksgiving, Halloween, and Christmas create a lot
of community spirit, something Central Florida needs more of. Traffic is actually pretty
good on weekends. Its afternoons during schooldays and workdays when the streets are
super crowded.

Finally found a kind of part or full time career and day job I can actually probably do and
actually might be good at: It involves manufacturing. Yep. I could get a job packing or
packaging local manufactured goods that local clients sell. Im like Hank Hill. I pack
propane and propane accessories. I saw some local news footage featuring people
working at an office packing and packaging metal objects. I thought to myself, Hey!
Thats not such a bad idea. Maybe I can do that for a living temporarily!

Tuesday, November 01, 2011,

Im getting bored with anime. Its all starting to blend together to me. Its hard to
distinguish one anime series archetype from dozens and dozens of others, which all feel
like the same thing over and over again. Whether its a cemetery scene or an illuminated
city at night, its starting to feel sort of clich to me. Is there anything in Japanese anime

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that isnt a repeated clich anymore? The style has good line quality, but why does that
matter when its the same 10 to 15 scenes put on repeat play. I want to watch a lot of
anime, but the repetitiousness is driving me crazy.
Essay: The Evils of Celebrity
Considering how many journalists, internet trolls, and bad actors want to frame me and
set me up to take some kind of a fall or crime, or paint me as some form of lower life
form, Ive actually come to appreciate and value the fact that Im not actually famous and
no one knows who I am. Screenwriting isnt something people do for fame, and neither is
being a storyboard artist. No fame = no attempts to blackmail me with any form of
success to them. I value my mystery, obscurity, and invisibility, and that no one knows
my full name or real face. No one probably ever will, and for that reason Im in luck.
Fame and notoriety would only bring bad things with them, like less privacy than what
small amount I already have preserved. Just because youre the center of attention and
dont have much privacy doesnt automatically mean you are famous. People try to
encroach on my personal space, overstep my boundaries, invade my privacy and frame or
blackmail and generally attempt to endanger my well being and life at least a few times a
week. Does anyone seriously think press coverage, interviews, articles about me, media
outlets I have credits in, awards, shout outs, or any positive fame would actually help me
at this point. Money would help. Fame never would. Its awesome not being famous (i.e.
stalked). I thank the Lord every day Im not actually famous while some actually think I
am famous. I used to think the same way, until I realize how bad most famous people
have it. Celebrity is evil. Ill have no part in something that evil. I dont want to be an
indentured entertainer slave. So I wont be. Im glad Im not technically a part of that evil
corrupt machine. I dont envy people on TV at all. They belong there trapped in the idiot
box, as I belong here, in this house, free as all hell, where it wont drive you insane from
all the stressunless you formally get involved with it on an official level of course.
Fame is dangerous. Celebrity is dangerous. Its a threat, especially recently. Its just a
little too easy to ruin someones reputation when that reputation is known on such a
universally moronic and obvious level. It doesnt take any real strategy to ruin famous
peoples reps. Just a big mouth. Being a celebrity, or whatever the hell it is, is for
criminals, thieves, and dunderheads. Actual smart celebrities are writers, everyone else is
dumb as fuck and actually has sex. But thats part of why a lot of people say no one is a
celebrity writer: They dont exist: Because they dont. Writers are hardly ever famous,
and even when theyre famous, most dont recognize them regardless. Theyre paid well,
but thats about it.
So it appears my priorities are now in order. Ive realized fame is not for me. Basically
ever. It is, in reality, Evil and corrupt.
Names shouldnt even be considered until right before publication day. For security
reasons, you shouldnt name yourself ANYTHING at the beginning of your career,
really. A lot of people will try to take your name from you, and theyll be complete
strangers, too.

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On another note, I seemed to have survived the so-called 27 Curse. Wasnt too hard, but I
was a little paranoid about it.
Maybe I can make a practice comic book or quasi-non-fiction graphic novel out of nonvisual book: the Joes Manifesto Journal Series. Joe doesnt make that bad of a comic
book protagonist, does he? Pronoun trouble I guess. Almost anything I write could
probably make a decent comic over time, assuming I look up enough research material
and draw enough thumbnails. How much would be dialogue? How much would be
exposition? How much would be mostly or purely visual concepts inspired by words I
wrote at one point? Actually, that might not be such a bad idea.
I wonder if I can draw autobiographical scenes of myself designing Mono. There is story
demand for Mono, and there seems to be JUST AS MUCH story demand for my own
personal life, ironically enough. The people, they seem to love the drama of my life,
even though theyre not the ones living it and never have been (thats my job, Im the
lucky one that gets to do that and go on wacky adventures).

Wednesday, November 02, 2011,

Im now aware of one thing my fight sequences are missing: Anatomical foreshortened
anatomy and prop close-ups. Foreshortened proportions for high-intensity close-ups. I
drew two pages that turned out that way, one being a kick and one being a sword.
Foreshortened camera shots, for kicks, punches, swords, and costumes in various camera
shots and angles amounts to a high dynamic and cinematic quality.
Things not many others do:
Fabric & Drapery
Notan
Angularity
Costume
Fight Choreography
Mechanical Design
Foreshortened Action Anatomy

Ive regained my spiritual awareness of the spiritual concepts I developed in my

adolescence, which I refer to as the Radical Emptiness of All That Is. Ive remained
unaware of these early theories of mine before I was as publicly disliked as I am now.
The former refers to my interpretation of spiritual Enlightenment or Living Nirvana. The
latter refers to the Cosmos, Integral Being, and Existence as it is perceived by Human
Beings. There is also the I or Self, and the You and Them, or Other, as it is referred to in
Existentialism. If Im not mistaken, I felt as though I already had attained Enlightenment
in my private studies, before my life was a spectacle, ironically enough. I didnt become
un-Enlightened. I just forgot that I was. During that time my Chi and Chakra was at an all

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time high. It was kind of like Being Highon life I suppose. I dont utilize mind
expanding drugs.
Now, not all is lost. I remember why I chose Buddhism and Taoism as the religions I
belong to. Theyre the most powerful, most energy based religion. When you get in touch
with your inner Buddha, youre literally channeling your spiritual energy to manifest
throughout your being. There is definitely a Beast of untamed energy and destruction in
me, and if left unchecked it could do some serious damage to society. I really could be
the bad guy if I wanted to. But Buddhism helps keep the Inner Beast in Check, at Bay, so
I dont become another Bryne of the world. There is a duality in my being that shifts
between benevolent and malevolent. Its subtle, but its there. I forgot about the Power of
Channeling the Enlightenment of The Buddha and the Tao for 2 seconds, and my life
becomes a mess because of it. The media and fans literally want to hunt me down and kill
me every so often. Thats not what Buddhist Teachings condone, clearly. For a few years
there, I didnt even consider myself a Buddhist, sometime between 2006 and 2011, I
didnt consider myself a Buddhist. I was leaning more towards Christianity or Christbased religion, but now Im back with Zen Again, at least currently.
As it turns out, I can lower my body temperature when the air conditioning is on, and
create goose bumps with the power of my own will and inner strength. Ive realized
something. Meditation makes you less aggressive and violent. Counting your breath and
breathing deeply makes you less aggressive and violent. Why? Its because high body
temperature is conducive to violent and disturbing activity. Meditation lowers body
temperature, therefore making one less prone to aggression. Its all science.
Me and my drawing style, once the media discovered us, slowly but surely, me and my
art got inspected, dissected, watered-down, filleted, redrawn, rewritten, test-screened,
focus-grouped, psychoanalyzed, and royally screwed. An entertaining, vibrant, and
revolutionary character having the living shit kicked out of him.

Saturday, November 05, 2011,

Story vs. Plot

Story: A Sequence of Unconnected, Random Events.

Plot: A Sequence of Events that are tied together by meaning.

Story: The King died. The Queen died.

Plot: The King Died, and the Queen died of grief.

Plot leaves many less unanswered questions in storytelling. Story leaves many of those
questions unanswered, with little room for meaning.

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Scenes-Beats

Scene Length: There are Long Scenes, Short Scenes, and Medium Scenes.

Start, Middle, and End of a Scene: Every scene has a beginning, middle, and end,
just like the plot and subplots.

Sunday, November 06, 2011,

Competition?

DC Animated Franchise
Samurai Jack
Invader Zim
Avatar The Last Airbender
The Boondocks

Things not used by competition. Innovative things never done before in America:

Ballistics
Paramilitary Protagonists
Religious Themes
Apocalypse Mythology
Forensics
Cop Show Investigation
Long Martial Arts Scenes (Martial Arts Rhythm)
Choreography
Reincarnation

The great thing about doing an adult show is you can tackle topics normally only
addressed in shows like South Park, Family Guy, and King of the Hill, and put them into
a dramatic action movie context instead of the regular comedic context
So Im compiling my newest published art book. Its my thickest art-related book yet,
featuring various prominent comics covers, sketches, comics, and illustrations Ive done
over what is mostly the last 8 years.
Art: Manifested: The Artwork of JM Matthews is going to be publish probably sometime
in December, at almost exactly 300 pages of both rough and refined artwork in large
varieties and many categories. The proportions I have in my head of the finished book
reminds me of what my copy of those Scott McCloud academic books look like I doubt
Ill be able to get it to have that same rough newspaper style of page printing though.

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Though I am a bit uncomfortable in the spotlight, and fame to me is anxiety, paranoia,

and fear, I could help but notice I have the magnetism, charisma, intensity, and energy. I
have the intensity, energy, and charisma of 100 people combined. No wonder I attract a
lot of attention. My energy level is very high. Its almost athletic in a way. I have the
energy levels of an athlete. Hell, I was an athlete when I was in my adolescence, until I
was forced to take medication which made me sedentary and fatigued, causing me to gain
a hundred lbs. never to return from mid-to-high level obesity again.
Its been at least a month or two since Ive been on the Adult Swim boards. Ive been too
busy doing other stuff: like compiling my newest art book.
Whenever I appear on TV, Im going to appear besides some made up veteran celebrity
expert with black curly hair and Buddy Holly glasses I pulled out of my ass. Not that he
actually has a real history of credentials, a real job as a pundit, or has a real job as an
expert. Hes an actor I made up and made up a back story and biography for who I
certainly hope people will buy into this crock of shit Im throwing at them on my
blowhard talking head show. Gullible people always buy into some guy with glasses and
curly hair claiming he has credential on TV who sort of looks like me, a person who
actually exists (a claim hell never be able to authentically make), Right? I thought so.
People will believe anything you tell them and buy any shit from your ass you try to sell
them, AS LONG AS your on a computer or TV.
Monday, November 7, 2011,
I like systems work. I like working with organic systems. That is why animation, comics,
films, and novels fascinate and draw me to them so much is because it in a way is a
system you build. A franchise is a system, as is the form and structure of the creative
structure, whether its a television animated series, a manga or indie comic book, a
fantasy novel, or an action film. They all have a structural system, and they all get
manifested over time, constructed by one person or a team, but often just one person or a
few people. Computers also make a great systems outlet for the Rational mind, but
computers are too complex for me to really master and fully comprehend them, even
though I already am really good with them. Its just Im not one of the best, Im just
really, really good.

Finally, finally, fina-lly!!! Its happening. Im slowly, meekly, and primitively beginning
to draw as well as my heroes in some instances, in terms of textural kaleidoscopes.
McFarlane, Otomo Katsuhiro, Moebius, Syd Mead, Corey Senderov Jackson, Joe
Mad. After a decade of intense, fret-filled, anxiety-and-depression causing existential
self-doubt, and a whole decade of good old fashioned practice, upon reviewing the
contents of my upcoming art book, I can indeed confirm that slowly but surelyon a
level that is so sedentary and static for such a long amount of time over timeIm
gaining ground on my favorite science-fiction animation, comics, and cinematic,
visionary production designers. Ive improved a whole hell of a lot. That Thing they do in
their very detailed work. I seem to have adapted that same Thing into my work over time

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by thinking like I imagine they would. Ive been playing catch up with those artists my
whole professional life, and now I actually am catching up with them in certain more
abstract ways that nonetheless result in tangible results. Ive re-created Notan,
Romanticism, Avant-Garde Cinema, Surrealism, French New-Wave, Wuxia,
Cyberpunk, Cubism, Neo-Noir, Expressionism, High Fantasy, Franime Comics and
Animation Storyboards, Sword and Planet. And thats pretty much it. Ive borrowed
aesthetic elements from all of these styles, often on an individual case by case basis. All
this alchemic synthesis only seems ambitious, but once you put pen to paper, or pencil or
paint to paper, it just feels natural, just really right and pure. And complex and heavy,
with a lot of international substance. My style is both the compression and combination
of these styles, and the sequential arrangement of them, if you ask me.
Though I am kind of finally catching up to the production designers and comic book
artists I admire the most, more than anyone else in the world, I still feel weird about it. I
still feel just as plagued by insecurity and self doubt and a sense of people not liking me
as when I only just started doing this thing. Am I still a big fool? Is my art still legit or
believable if the public only wants to view me as a fool? Does a builder whos considered
a foolis he only able to build buildings for other fools? Or does he build security for
all, for everybody? I dont want to be a fool and I dont want to be a punk-bitch. What is
it exactly that makes others perceive me on a personal level as a fool? Or is that but an
illusion that accompanies the folklore?
The Loner

I answer to nobodys standards and higher calling but my own.

I work by nobodys timeline but my own.
I yield to nobodys standard of ethics but my own.
I practice nobodys religion but my own.
I judge my art, writing, and ideas by no ones standard, but my own.
I live for no one but myself.
I seek no ones approval but my own.
I am my own man. I live alone, by my own code.
That is my ideal. I make the rules, I hardly ever follow them.

I do have internal responsibility, honor, and duty of service, but I play by my own rules
and live by my own laws. Mostly.
Art is a sport in many ways. It is physical, it is powerful, its a business, its tough, and
its competitive. How is that NOT a sporting event? It is. And just like in sports where
training, practice, and preparation is necessary, art involves practice, training, and
preparation, if one is going to survive in it, in this craft and industry. It also involves
discipline, iron will, repetition, fearlessness, and hard work in copious, generous
amounts.

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Tuesday, November 08, 2011,

I love drawing and writing almost as much as I love appreciating the aesthetics of
contemporary cinema production design, for both animation and live action world
cinema. The design aesthetics of detail in cinema, comics, and animation all lead back to
science-fiction films and comics, Moebius, Tezuka, and Katsuhiro Otomo mostly.
My art isnt easy to draw. Its hard work. It involves many hours of intense laborintensive concentration and pencil mileage and theorizing and strategizing and
contemplation. But despite all that, its incredibly worth pursuing, because despite all that
it still turns out incredible and creates powerful artwork half the time. I draw power-art,
or power-fantasy, well, sometimes I do. Still, Im just as capable as boggling the mind
with art now as I was when I was 17 and 18 years old back in art school, around college
age. Looking back through a collection of my best finished art re-invigorated me. It
revitalized me. Im not anywhere near as afraid of drawing or the criticism of other artists
now as I was before. Because I am as good as I think I am, and Im one of the very best.
Better than most, and harder working than most. And it shows quite often, especially in
my 300 pg collection art book. I cant wait to order a copy. I wanna see how that badboy
turned out. I dont feel the least bit guilty about admiring my own miraculous work, even
when people mock me and it. In spite of the way people mock me and it, is more like it.
My art makes me happy to look at it, simple as that. I could stare at it for hours, if not
days. I do stare at it for hours, if not days. Im just as good as any Master Artist, because
I myself am indeed a Master Artist, a True Romanticism Master, critics and haters be
damned.

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Chapter 47

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Tuesday, November 08, 2011,

Press Releases; Adventures in Press Coverage
Mentions in the press, as Ive noticed, arent really meant to promote the creation of art,
or the building of an ambitious project. Instead, theyre primarily written about what
happens to artists, writers, authors, filmmakers, and their projects after theyre finished,
manufactured, and released to the market, both before and afterward. By then all the hard
work is totally finished anyway. Press Junkets like to focus on the attractive,
romanticized aspects of working on a comics project: The fame, the glamour, the cash,
the fans, enjoying hard earned success. They dont really focus much on all the actual
labor that goes into achieving such epic amounts of success. Where the press and media
focus on is where you and everyone else want to be. But if you want to get there, youve
got to do the work no one talks about, even online. The media does love emphasizing the
easy stuff, the stuff that isnt methodical craft, and work, and process. I dont have a
problem with that, at all really, but Id much rather focus on the adventure of the career
of flow-state of work and labor. The process, and labor, that leads up to the
achievement of all that success is right where I am: The Eye of the Storm. Thats
where I want to be, at the center of the work, not doing press. Im not as interested in
where Ill end up 5 to 10 years from now. I never would have had this type of focus and
wisdom in my early childhood and adolescence. I wouldnt say the things said here are
obvious, because a lot of people miss them, but its a bad idea to ignore such
fundamentals of success: Hard work, will power, discipline, and strain. Oh yes, and
poverty, fear, rejection, and lots and lots of fretting. The press covers a kind of
lifestyle I never experience, and may never experience in this lifetime: The
successful life. One with actual sex and admiration and actual money. Not my life in
other wordsnot that I mind. When I was a kid I would fantasize about myself
getting a lot of press for my work. For a time, at that point, it wasnt even about the
actual work and strain and pushing myself to achieve greater: It was about my own
misguided egotism. I think we all know that feeling: Getting high off of your own
future success and ego, preaching in your writing to the masses things they dont
really ever actually need to hear, imagining a better life but not doing what needs to
be done to reach that better life in reality, making the achievement match the dream
and ambition: Action and the humility and adventure of work. Real success and real
life success has a lot of history and buildup, if its actually real. It doesnt just
appear out of a void like a magic trick, unless its deception. The press deletes and
omits that labor-intensive buildup and history of the typical success biography,
sending us, the audience, the subliminal message that if we can cocoon ourselves into
hiding, doing nothing for ten years (a decade, no actual work, ironically), then
because weve waited like good little boys and girls for Santa to arrive, well
automatically get what we deserve or succeed like we deserve, and Emerge
Famouswith little to no buildup, effort, obstacles, opposition, resistance, or hard
work standing in our way, or that stood in the way. And above all, no patience on
our part either, sadly. Thats far from the truth. Behind every industry legend is an
ocean of courage and hard work, or in an artists case: Pencil Mileage, Practice, Work,
and Training. Its the same in every country. Inevitably, its the product and sometimes

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the entrepreneur that gets romanticized, idealized, and glamorized in the eyes of young
and gullible impressionables: Hardly ever are we presented with the process to attain that
planned and revised product. Or the story that led up to the creator sitting pretty at his
animators desk in front of a behind-the-scenes TV camera.
I seem to have started with an ass-backward philosophy at the beginning of my career. I
used to think on a subconscious level
A) Seek publicity (the internet) first, and then secure a product.
Instead Ive learned its:
A) Seek to secure a product, and then seek publicity (the internet).
Now that I know the $250,000 that Bang Zoom spent on the show I worked on pretty
much went to waste and didnt return on investment, on a show I was responsible for
contributing material to initially, I cant exactly say I blame them for being mad at me for
losing money from their budget. For a show that was moderately expensive, Im sure
they were actually expecting it to be some kind of big hit. But in the beginning I was
being kept in the dark about just how many resources went into AnimeTV, the series I
worked on for free. I never signed a contract either. The irony of the whole situation is
kind of shocking to me. I think it ended up being shocking to a lot of people. Thats a bad
omen when you lose $200,000 on a show you promoted really heavily in the beginning,
and it ends up being one of your biggest bombs ever. I reek of failure. We all do. I was
never actually informed of the pressures of working on a TV show with an actual budget
behind it. At one point I was so crazy and depressed, and blocked because of the
partial media fame, pressure, goodwill, and success AnimeTV association gave me
overnight. That element was never brought up.
I like screenwriting, and I like TV anime-animation, and I like martial arts, and I
like High Fantasy or Science Fiction, and I like Action movies from the U.S. and
Hong-Kong. But no one is drawing these things in the American comic book
community, and especially not the American animation community. Maybe nobody
thought to. Maybe nobody has figured out how to yet. And maybe everyones afraid to,
being the one to disrupt the natural order. Im not afraid of being the brave soul who
makes that Journey. In a way, Im already on that Journey. Its hard to build things in
the Action-Fantasy genre. It takes a lot of scientific-based knowledge and visual
sketchbook analysis about nature and ballistics in action, to draw all the anatomy,
costumes, effects, and weapon props.
I need to draw and write to be alive. If Im not drawing or writing at least a few times a
week, I may as well be dead. Or watching TV all day. Its pretty much the same thing.

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1. The Beforehand Industry: This industry is the laborers, artists, writers, directors,
producers, and workers. The negotiation, the pitch, the sale, the contractual
signing, the cover letter, the inquiry, the series bible, the script, the storyboard, the
manuscript, the comic book issue, the trade paperback manuscript, the craft and
practice and work, the submissions, the rejection, the query letter. The aspiring
superstar, the rising star, the hot next big project, the future hit. Working on a
project in general, then refining and revising it until its a final draft.
2. The After-The-Fact Success Industry: Hollywood, the press, press coverage,
money, fame, power, distribution, broadcasting news; exists as a cottageas I
like to call itAfterward Industry. Everything is spoken of in-past-tense, after
the fact, after everything and everyone involved has been proven. Or at least until
the check is in the mail. This is the second half of the career I will probably never
reach because I was too obsessed with it in the beginning. Bad mistake.
I belong to the former group now. It will be a while until I reach the latter group. Steep
Climb. (Afterward: Correction. It was February of 2012 I made the latter group for the
first time.)
When you dream of being someone else, its just proof youre not satisfied with your own
level of status. At one point I wanted to be Todd McFarlane or Katsuhiro Otomo. Now
that Im happy with my art, now that Im satisfied with where Im at, Joseph Alberts is
the only person I really wish I was or aspire to be, now or any other time in the future. I
dont envy other artists. Im a big fan of my own art now. Its good enough. Why not,
you know?

Wednesday, November 9, 2011,

Youre artwork will teach you a lot of things about yourself and what your skill level is.
Looking at your portfolio will tell you:

What youre good at. What youre really good at. What youve mastered. What
you have an easy time with.

What your weak areas are. What you suck at. Areas that you need to continue
developing.
Storyboard, comics, production design: Areas that need work:

Storyboard: Clarity, Anatomy, Line tightening, motion

Comics: Clarity, line tightening, thumbnails, light table

Production design: Integration of background and foreground, Integration

of perspective.

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My goal for 2012, other than revising the End Times Bible and Being a screenwriter,
is to generate at least a few dozen pages of small tiny little paper thumbnails, with at
least three thumbnails per page. Tiny sketches and compositions with frames, or
box-panels around them. Theres movie screen thumbnails that stretch horizontally
across the entire width of the page, and then theres cartooning & storyboard panels,
which are squares. Thumbnails are the new morning pages, just as sketchbooks and
scripts are the new manifesto just as comic book pages were for a while
I cant figure out whether I want to be a comic book artist-writer, a storyboard artist &
screenwriter, or a novelist
Thumbnails are useful for: TV Animation, Comics
Screenwriting is for: Animation, Comics
Im actually kind of glad Im not on Wikipedia. That would indicate Im in the spotlight,
and Im not. Not really.
I got off to a slow start with my comics production process. But now Im actually finally
starting to integrate backgrounds into my sketchbook sequential art compositions. This is
equally effective in terms of how it will help me deal with
2 main career goals at the moment:

Publishing and printing individual comic book issues through Lulu. (print
marketing/distribution)
Digitally publishing
webcomics through Webcomics Nation. (web
marketing/distribution).

Theyre all internet-savvy, and all digital. And theyre coming soon to print and
traditional media.
Now that every page is going to have backgrounds in my sketchbooks, Im just one step
closer to being publishable in terms of my comic book series. Well, the fatigue has
definitely gone away for the most part. I guess it just took leaving the internet and
watching less TV to get un-fatigued. Those 5-Hour Energy Capsules really help.

Thursday, November 10, 2011,

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I went to the library, and got to see tons of one of my favorite things: Books. For a while
there, even though I am a self-titled author, I forgot the library even exists. Now Ive
checked out a good 6 to 7 books, got a new library card, and promptly went home after
that. I checked out all novels, some classic, some contemporary. Since Im going to be
writing a lot of fiction (probably) its only appropriate I read a lot of fiction, from short
stories to novels.
First off, fiction has a lot of dialogue most of the time. In some books the dialogue rate
even seems all the way at 60% to 70% of the manuscript, or higher.
Dialogue: The longer the book, the more dialogue its going to have.
In terms of classic literature, other than fantasy literature, I also like classic American,
British, French, and Russian novels and literature. Leo Tolstoy is often an influence on
my fiction writing, even though Ive never completely finished any novel Tolstoy has
written. Its more about the general vibe I get from his work: Something epic, sweeping,
dense, thick, and beautiful.
Authors Im studying on lone from the library:
Thomas Wolfe
Gene Wolfe
Joyce Carol Oates
Those are the famous ones. All the rest are obscure.
I still think its really cool I you can borrow books from the library for free, and they
even give you time to read them. I completely forgot about the joys of borrowing books
from the library.
Wow, I was watching City Confidential, a 2001 crime documentary episode, about a city
official, in Fort Lauderdale city, who paid for sex. Thats it? Thats all that happened? A
cop had sex with a prostitute in the late 90s or early 2000s? Youre doing a whole TV doc
show about that?? So what? Ive been to Fort Lauderdale. I lived there for quite a while,
at least a month or two in 2002, and it was a nice experience for me. Its a Beachside City
Ambiance in some ways, but still, very nice. It didnt seem bad to me at all when I was
living there in Sunrise Hall Apartments. It was one of the most electric, eventful times of
my life. But seriously, I never knew Fort Lauderdale was such an eventful place. Fort
Lauderdale is a nice place to live. Its where I met Nicole, and its also around where my
former mentor, Phil lives. In other words, its nice. Fort Lauderdale, Florida is a much
better place to live than Casselberry, Florida. The only real noticeable difference is Fort
Lauderdale is a big city and Casselberry isnt.
I really dont know much about writing Middle American Fiction Stories, despite the fact
that its almost all I ever see, it bores me so much I cant record any of it, and what little I
do record of it bores me to tears. If Im going to write fiction, if Im writing, I dont want

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to duplicate exactly what I see right in front of me. Thats boring. I want to be taken away
to exotic and far away places. The virtual world is practically the world I already live
in outside my natural surroundings. My home doesnt feel like home to me. I cant
quite figure out how to explain it. I dont feel at home in the Here and Now.
Id love to write fiction more often, specifically, novels. But I know Im not very good at
writing fiction thats removed from the context of my daily life, which would probably
include general fiction and fantasy novels.
I have more problem imagining real world happenings (the context of a novel), than I do
picturing moving art and sequential art based storylines So what does that leave me with?
Cant write:

Novels
Realist fiction

Can Write:

(script) Animated Beats / Scenes (Action-Adventure, Science Fiction Fantasy)

(script) Anime Script Outlines (Action-Adventure, Science Fiction Fantasy)
(script) TV Animation Scripts (Action-Adventure, Science Fiction Fantasy
(script) Comic Book Scripts (Action-Adventure, Science Fiction Fantasy)

I do take a novelistic structure to screenwriting animation and writing comics. I like to

use human protagonists in real world clothes with five fingers on each hand.
So in the near future, instead of being a 50% Novelist, 50% Screenwriter, Ill be an 85%
screenwriter, and 15% Outline-Novelists.
I write scripts and screenplays with fantasy and action-adventure novels in mind. I like to
be in the same headspace, strangely enough. Im hardly ever in the mood to create
realism. To me, if somethings fantasy, then it should not occupy complete reality. If
something is fantasy, it should be the opposite of reality.
Fantasy is Imaginary and Exotic. Comics and Cartoons are Simple and Graphic.
Novels are Complex and Real.
Or maybe I shouldnt yield to a format just yet, and instead just tell the story.

I take great joy in obsessively configuring and reconfiguring the organic structure and
format of my documents.

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Elements of scene structure that need work:

Scene sequencing
Scene order
Scene structure
Middles of scenes
Beginning, Middle, and End of Scene
Structure
Novels: Scenes Chapters
Scripts: Scenes (Start, middle, end), - Beginning Middle End
What to do when youre an adult living in an adult world, and your parents treat you like
a child.
Fundamentals of Story Structure:

Plot
Story
Beginning
Middle
End
Inciting Incident
Plot Point
Chapter
Scene
Description
Dialogue
Action
Scene Transition

Scene: Definition:
End of Scene = Written in script as: Cut To:
Scene-to-Scene Panel Transition

Story and Conflict

Conflict (or) Antagonism are the two main forces of storytelling that move the story
along, other than the Inciting Incidents and Scenes. Scenes must have conflict or it isnt
story.
There are 3 Kinds of Conflict and Antagonism

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Inner Conflict Internal, Stream of Consciousness, Inner Monologue, Decisions, Fear

Personal Conflict Soap Opera, Drama / Andrew, Cary, Peggy, Jinnel
Extra-Personal Conflict Action, Adventure / Bryan, FLA Police (epic, blockbuster)

Manifestation of Conflict Arguments, Aggression, Violence, Cursing, Pursuit, Feds

In screenwriting and filmmaking, there are also what Robert McKee refers to as Setups
and Payoffs, and Emotional Transitions.
Setup: Is a moment when initial cryptic facts are given as a form of foreshadowing the
Payoff: Puts The Setup into Context through the Payoff.
Emotional Transitions:
Shift from positive to negative
Or shift from negative to positive
I couldnt help but notice this, but:
DC Universe and Pokemon scripts have more holes in their plots than 10 lbs. of Swiss
cheese.

From what they told me, Film France is an organization, not a group of producers. Still,
at least I asked them and inquired into the situation to begin with

Yes, I do dabble a little in Literary Martial Arts, and Literary Martial Arts
Choreography.
Im writing a cinematic sci-fi martial arts script thats similar in nature to The Matrix, at
least in genre, but nonetheless Im still taking every precaution to diverge from The
traditional John Woo and Matrix formula of action filmmaking and screenwriting quite a
bit. Still, my story is awesome. Any studio in town that cares about storythat story
matters towould probably get a kick out of this script Im writing.
Im going down the path of pioneers and revolutionaries, just like Otomo and Moebius.
My visual storytelling and narrative stylewhether its a literary style or art styleis
mad powerful! Other filmmakers and artists copy my creative style because its a

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dynamic, powerful style. Not every drawing I do is perfect, but when you see the initial
vision of my mythos, its powerful, and most people cant help but feel inspired in some
way by that. Ive created one of the most powerful mythos, fantasies, and literary-cinema
narratives around. And to think I used to just assume my art was soft and weak. Quite the
opposite, if were talking about the big picture.
Its quite ironic how, unless were talking about a Google Search or AnimeTV, I have
authority in some places, but not recognition.
List time:
Powerful assets for drawings comics online, that I didnt have before now:

Fight Choreography Cheat Sheet

Understanding of Scene Structure
Foreshortened Anatomy
Colored Pencils
Light Table
Thumbnail Sketches
Backgrounds linework
Compositional Dividing Line
Regained Strength and Energy
Using a Lightbox to fill pages with detail, Corey style
Perspective Knowledge

Public Places I have a little bit of authority and control:

Cartoon Network
Adult Swim
Bang Zoom Entertainment
Williams Street
Television
Marketing
The Internet
YouTube
Google
Webcomics Nation
DeviantART
World Manga
Production Design
Social Media
The Web 2.0

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Twitter
France & Paris
Japan
The Hub
Hong-Kong
Britain
Egypt
The Middle East
Eurasia
Production I.G.
Pixar
Hollywood
Silicon Valley
Viz Media
Tokyopop
Titmouse
JM Animation
Nicktoons
LucasFilm
Dreamworks SKG
Funimation
ASMB
Amazon Inc. International

Ive got around 300-400 pages of art scanned to my laptop by now, well, the good art
anyway. The bad art I kind of destroy or delete. I dont know if Ill ever get around to
putting all of it on Photobucket or WCN, because theres just an army of it. Its a pain in
the ass organizing it and looking through all of it, even when its in file format on my
computer.
Saturday, November 12, 2011,
Assignment: Daydream fight sequences. Design one fight scene each day.
When I cell-shade with black ink on a computer, its like cel-shading, but its not. I call it
ink-shading, or black cel-shading.

Theres a device in Photoshop called the Polygonal Lasso Tool. Ive heard a lot about
this option, but I dont have Photoshop yet. If Im not mistaken, its good for things like
my Notan-Noir illustrations, Expressionism, and (especially) cell-shading in b&w and
color.

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End Times and Mono will be like a million times easier to ink, if I manage to master celshading. I can go way beyond Frank Miller and Batman with that kind of inking
technology.
You cant get any leverage out of a single page of art. Believe me, Ive tried. Art is a
continual process. Doing just 1 page doesnt reflect well on you as an artist. Black and
Dark Pages look better than White Pages, both technically and aesthetically. This is how I
prefer to do things. Take it or leave it. Nothings going to change this, my love for Black.
I am part Goth after all. Black pages appeal to intelligent, mature, and sophisticated
readers who like dark and macabre things, and other innovative creative visuals. White
pages lack not only maturity, experience, and wisdom, but also age and creativity. I know
with most white pages Im not going to get anything truly adult. White pages are for
children. Black compositions are for mature adults and have a sense of sophistication and
timelessness. Black pages arent just meant to portray death and horror. They also
represent wisdom and creativity. White may be pure and cute, but at least black has
some experience behind it. And no ones going to sell me a counter opinion any other
way either. Far as Im concerned my mind is already made up. Black is better than White.
Fuck white. Fuck purity.

Other famous INFPs (my 50%):

William Shakespeare
JRR Tolkien
Peter Jackson
Im also part INTP and INTJ.
One of my unconventional aspects has to do with my usage and philosophy on color, or
more specifically, Power Colors. I believe Black can make just as much of a healing
color as white does. Most people, when they think healer, they think white, and when
they think evil, they think black. I see it in reverse much of the time. To me the purity of
white, theres something fake and untrustworthy about it. Whites initial innocent
impression can easily be used to deceive and lie and exploit trust. Black is a constant.
Hardly ever does it change or get darkened. Black absorbs all, including pain. This
sounds like Goth Poetry, I knownot that theres anything wrong with Goth Poetrybut
it truly does express how I feel about White and Black. Black gives me a sense of power,
and therefore paves and pioneers the way through fear to a sense of acceptance, peace,
and comfort. Power cravings arent always bad. Power represents stability and security in
some ways, and therefore has a strong potential to be used for Healing and by Healers.
White isnt the only color that purifies people. Black can revitalize and sooth.
Ive thought about the criticisms that could potentially be leveled at whatever it is I do
with screenwriting, how Im doing new things with new genres, essentially: Someone
might say something like Fantasy is too imaginary to write in a book!, Science fiction
uses too much science!, Action shows and movies are too hard to describe in words!.

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Fortunately animation and comics makes all of these problems acceptable due to its less
literary, more cinematic nature, and also, it makes these difficulties workable, even with
basic scene structure. You have to write a simple fight scene or sequence before you can
write a 10 to 20 minute one, just like you have to write short, simple scenes before you
write long, complex ones with lots of dialogue and three act structure formats.
Legendary Designers: Moebius, Otomo, Hiroaki Samura, Bruce Timm, Frank Miller,
Min-Woo Hyung, Yoshiyuki Sadamoto, Yasuhiro Nightow, Jamie Hewlett, Jhonen. Yup,
theyre real designers.
I like including a lot of guns and swords in my page designs, as well as a lot of fabric.
I make a lot more money working for a collective force than I probably ever could going
into business for myself. The check must never be written out to me! Or else!

The Rise of Digital Comic Books-&-Manga Online

Viz.com and Darkhorse.com are turning Digital Comicsno, not webcomics, digital
comicsinto the mp3s of the comic book industry, which is impressive, considering
there isnt a universally profitable distribution prototype model yet. Graphic.ly is trying,
but not hard enough. Why cant someone invent some decent reading-viewing software
that isnt PSP (which I will never own, and dont want to either)? If someone could just
invent some decent Digital Comic Book reading-viewing app thats universally
compatible with all platforms, that person would get rich quick. And dont cop out by
telling me to go buy a Kindle, either. Way too expensive and clunky. If you like Clunky
and Expensive, youll LOVE Kindle! But I need more. I really want to start buying
digital comics, but I need software to store them in that isnt Kindle, PSP, or iTunes. I
dont use any of those. But still, this seems like a good start, at least in terms of large
corporate publishers distribution and retail strategies. Sampling product has definitely
made me want to buy some product.

I invented a new word, to describe the fear of genius and geniuses: Ingeniophobia. Fear
and hatred of people who are geniuses, or at the very least, smarter than you. Bryan,
though in a way he was an evil genius, as I soon came to recognize, he also had an
irrational fear of geniuses, probably due to his own self-loathing sociopathological
tendencies. Geniuses have such Haunting Eyes, dont they? Yeah, theyre such
MONSTERS. Seriously, snap out of it! Snap out of your daydreams in Candyland,
Bryan.

I think Ive identified my problem. The thing I want most in the world, is to draw at
Otomo and McFarlanes level, the Southeast Asian Level so to speak. Because Im
really only showing potential for going to that level, and not completely going there and
reaching that high note of Quality, the fact that Im setting impossible standards Im

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nowhere near is eating me up inside. I need to accept the level Im at, which is simple and
abstracted in some ways. My writing is there, but the art is lagging much of the time, with
a few notable exceptions. The only way Id ever reach Otomos level would be if I could
match his detail level naturally without going out of my way too much in terms of real
effort. Until I reach that detail-on-steroids look naturally, I need to accept where I am
with my work now. I need to accept where I am now and how I draw now. Its the only
real way to progress, incrementally, and not dynamically.
Tuesday, November 15, 2011,
Unfinished Tasks:

Memorizing Notes from Art & Fear and Doing The Work
Practicing New Art Techniques (Storyboard, Production Design)
Practicing New Screenwriting Techniques (Outlines, 3 Act Scenes)
Buying Photoshop
Buying Distribution Info Book (1001 Marketing Techniques)
Buying my art book
Writing and Finishing Fight Choreography Dictionary
Cutting TV out of my Diet
Subscribing to Netflix
Continuing to rip anime
Uninstalling Bad Software
Writing Filler Material for New Earth, Mono Timeline (fighting, combat)

The Power of Patience

Patience is indeed very important in the Zen-Like quest to become a successful and
professional artist, writer, and creator in filmmaking or literature. Becoming a successful
comic book artist doesnt happen overnight, and neither does becoming a professional
screenwriter. These things can take decades or longer. Its taken me 2 years so far. Only
another 20 years of work and practice to go. Jhonen Vasquez himself once told me in an
online correspondence, about drawing comic book pages Take your time. Theyre not
easy. By which he clearly meant, its real work, give it time, Ill need a lot of patience.
All professional writers and artists know the market value of patience. Wanting
everything to happen and reach you Hear and Now is impractical.
Im not going to be a better artist, illustrator, or screenwriter today or tomorrow. That
pleasure and privilege and that much power wont come into my life for years, so Id
better accept my current level, even if its not all that impressive. But still its important
to still at least attempt to write scripts and draw comics every day, even when its only
beginners work.
Areas where Patience Pays off:

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Screenwriting
Sequential Art
Storyboard
Outline
Beginning, Middle, and End
Rewriting and Revising
Editing

Also, I dont have a lack of ability or talent. I have a lack of patience for my craft, my
work, my career. I have a difficult time just sitting back and letting things call into place.
And staying on topic, and having the discipline to continue doing the same thing for more
than one day.
When it comes to screenwriting, theres really only two creative (and 2 other structural,
but not as important) elements to master:
Action, Dialogue, (Transitions, and Scene Heading)
It only took me 2 years to master writing with all the above elements in script format.
Next thing in my playbook is learning how to master writing out Acts 1, 2, and 3 of each
scene, all while adding setups and payoffs, and emotional shifts. And then there conflict
and opposition or animosity related to the protagonists by nature, individuals and society,
or god, the devil, and the supernatural.

Wednesday, November 16, 2011,

Things I need to do before I die:
Go out drinking with friends
Move out of my parents house
Drive
Buy a car
Pay for a house on loan
Find new friends and colleagues
Fly across the country
Fly cross Atlantic
Visit Europe, Asia, and travel Eurasia
Write a script
Get a day job
Get a career
Maybe have kids
Maybe get married
Date

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Move across country. Forever

Stop seeing doctors. Forever.
Stop taking pills. Forever.

I think overall, my creative styles got to be award worthy on some level. There was the
Telly award a few years back, and the AnimeTV Anime Expert Plaque Bang Zoom
Entertainment sent me. But do those count as awards? I wonder if one of my publishing
or media projects will ever win a bigger award, like an older, more prestigious award.
Im thinking of compiling a literary file for all of the people I know, who I could easily
turn into fictional characters once I have their profiles sorted.
Eragon. Inheritance. When I look at a fellow genius, fellow person with 50/50 right/left
brain dominance, possessor Christopher Paolini, a fellow artist-writer-author, a fellow
Scorpio and 4/22 who has the same birth date as me, and notice he has all these
characteristics, and on top of all that he looks shockingly almost exactly like me too,
except thinner, it shocks me and delights me at the same time. His birthday is tomorrow,
so Im happy for that in a way even if I dont know him, because his birthday is on the
same day and year as my birthday: November 17th, 1983. Hes like my long lost identical
twin or clone or cousin or something! Amazing! I thought Eragon looked like a pretty
cool concept, book series, and movie, not to mention the next big thing in Fantasy and on
the New York Times Bestseller List. Hes so much like me! Im a fantasy literature
author too. Its like theres no reason to feel alone anymore, knowing people like him and
Katsuhiro Otomo are out there. Christopher Paolini is like JK Rowling, so cool, so
awesome. Hes one of the first actual instances where I discovered who he was in the
media, found out he was just like me in many ways, and with him Im finally able to say
to myself Now theres a guy whos just like me but A) Hes not actually intentionally
trying to be just like me on purpose through deception and manipulation. His
resemblance to myself is the real deal. B) Hes an authentic long lost public persona, and
hes the first time Ive seen a fellow entertainer who acted just like me (by coincidence)
where for once, I actually didnt have to say to myself Man, Im really embarrassed for
that guy. Paolini isnt embarrassing at all. Im proud to have a lot in common with him!
Kind of like Phil and John Lasseter, and Otomo.
No ones ever adapted a webcomic into a TV animation, animated series before, let alone
an anime-manga-related one. If I accomplished that, Id be the very first! Id be paving a
tunnel to a whole new world and universe of production technique, from script to
storyboard. No wonder my scripts and storyboards are so precious to me. Theyre the
pillars of my foundation. But the times are changing. Maybe one day TV producers will
be seeking webcomics like mine for source material to develop and adapt one day. God I
hope so. Im praying. Lots of praying happening in this case. I just wish someone, other
than the Telly Award committee, Steve Blum, Jhonen Vasquez, Eric P Sherman, Bang
Zoom Entertainment, and George Lucas would notice me, and cut me some slack, cut me
a deal of some kind for adaptation rights. Im already an expert at many of the technical

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aspects of animation. As big of a technical expert as any animation fan in America can
get without already being a professional.
Thats my goal! I want one of the networks to adapt Monos initial offering of webcomic
action adventures to the small screen: Television animation. If ever possible. Something
tells me Im going to need a lot of confidence, a can-do attitude, and a resilience to
handle setbacks. But if I do succeed, Ill be the talk of the manga town. I know its
possible. You would adapt Mono from the art and design source material online and in
my notebooks and on my hard drive the same way a network or studio would adapt any
other creative property with franchise potential. But if this vision is to become a sold and
adapted and real reality that gets produced, greenlit, made, adapted, picked up, and all
that other good stuff, its going to take not only some compromise on my side, but a lot of
tenacity and courage as well. For the time being, I might just have to do some political
lobbying on behalf of both self-published and web comic books. Not something Ive
mastered, but Ill learn.
Successful living = criticism from people all over the place. Everytime my popularity is
at its highest, I get some negative input. I justwish I responded to negative comments
better. Its a natural part of being successful in art: Being criticized.
Well, my webcomic did get one comment in its history. Something along the lines of
You draw perfect Japanese animation just like the real thing, and I cant stand that style
Its Boring! Boring, eh? Ah well, cant win em all. Though it is criticism, and it was
criticizing what in my opinion is the very reason I draw for: To emulate the Asian style.
Ironic in a way, but Im still at peace with it. Im glad I retired my online comics. Not
because of that comic, but because I seriously just need some sleep, so I can think
straight.
Its the eve of my birthday. 6 hours to go until I beat that evil 27 curse. Looks like I just
wasnt meant to die at the age of 27. Sorry Biography Channel.
Im going to wait until after my birthday day is over until I get back to work, maybe wait
a few days.
Even people who dont like anime have told me I draw good anime, essentially. Instead
of saying Ive succeeded at adapting to the manga-ka anime style, theyll complain about
how my style is boring and not real American comics, because its anime. Hey, Im not
trying to win everybody over. Honestly, Im just glad someone sees the positive elements
of my work, even if it is contrasted with stern criticism over drawing in a style (the
Japanese style) they dont like or enjoy. Ill take that over the people who used to say my
anime style was a Ichigo-rip any old day of the week!
Ive been criticized for:
Not drawing clean or finished sketches
Not drawing in a Western style (Japanese anime)

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Copying characters who werent even introduced in America until after Mono
Thursday, November, 17th, 2001,
Yay! Its my Birthday today! Happy Birthday To Me! I cant wait to open some of my
presents from my family. I just know they got me something cool this year.
My feelings of valuing poignant sentimentality are not widely shared in the mostly
irreverent American television industry. Nothing is sacred on American television. Its a
genuine Western cultural tragedy. Makes me sick to my stomach just looking at it. Im
done with televison. Cinema isnt American television. The only cinematic American
television is actual cinema. The two will never be one. I need to acknowledge this and
move on. Even if my script is only 22 pages long, its still a movie, or mini-movie
much like Star Wars: The Clone Wars is.

Friday, November 18, 2011,

Giant mecha in anime and animationall the cool ones anywayhave organic, humanlike body structures. The body of a giant mecha suit design resembles the anatomy of a
human body. So when you design an original Gundam, giant anime mechas, and whatnot,
one should always keep in mind the body of a robot primarily resembles
anthropomorphized anatomy. Pretty cool.
Artists such as Syd Mead, Enki Bilal, and Frank Frazetta are having a heavy influence in
my art style currently, the mechanics of it and whatnot. Im incorporating the dynamicy
of Frank Frazetta, the textural abstraction and beauty of Enki Bilals comics, and the
scientific precision and logic of Syd Meads mechanical and production designs. This is
getting exciting.
Art: Poses: I like crazy, insane, dynamic, exaggerated poses. A mixture of Burne
Hogarth, Frank Frazetta, John Woo, Jet Li, Yuen Woo-Ping, and Shaw Brothers, or
general classic Hong Kong kung-fu cinema with all the aerial gymnastics. And I dont
really believe in just doing a wide shot for a all exaggerated poses for everything either.
Exaggerated camera poses and camera shots onto of crazy poses are just asif not a
whole lot moreeffective at conveying insane levels of energy.
If it Looks Like every piece, every centimeter, every nano-meter, every tiny little object
and part of a design, composition, pose, mechanical drawing, background, costume, or
prop, like in Otomo or Todd McFarlane or Moebius was labored over with great intensity
and care, than that means, more than likely, it was labored over. Lazy drawings are
simple and suck out loud. Thats why you have to live in the flow, the process, the
production of your art, and you never actually leave. Makes it easy to reach that kind of
level of detail.

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Im going to use my Lightbox to trace printed photos of automotive engines, piece by

piece.
Other than Paul Pope, Hiroaki Samura is pretty much the only artist who Ive been a fan
of for a decade or longer whos actually still any good. Todd McFarlane, Jhonen
Vasquez, Dave Sim, Frank Miller, Katsuhiro Otomo. Almost all of their work that we
actually see has become dull over time. In other words, they dont draw half as good as
they did in the early 2000s or earlier.
Well, I finally have an evil superficial imposter character whose coat plagiarizes
Monos, and knowingly so. Actually, I have 2 characters who have evil Mono-wannabe
costumes: Krin and Onom. Both of their coats are white, not black. Krin is a Demon,
while Onom is a defective clone stolen from Monos DNA.
You cant plan to become a Syd Mead or a Todd McFarlane. Its a combination of
knowing the appropriate people, lots of energy with little fatigue, courage, fortitude and
tenacity, and a genuine love of the drawing process, the flow, or the work. Even Syd
Mead didnt know he would become The Syd Mead. He just kind of wandered about life
and various commissions and kind of fell into that position as a famous and influential
world class designer.
Andrew in fact is very, very arrogant. Hes overconfident and thinks hes better than not
just me, but essentially the entire world. He needs to come down off of his smug, high
and mighty little high horse. Because my brother is an arrogant, bigoted egomaniac, I
guess its my job to counterbalance that with some actual unselfishness, patience, and
humility.
I need to develop some Zen-like Patience. Patience is not just Virtue, it is Power, and
Value. He who waits patiently, with peace in his heart, will achieve everything in time.

When developing discipline, will power, talent, and skill, in writing, drawing, or any
other field, its important to learn to have the patience that is necessary to let such skills
grow and develop over time. Its important to be impatient about starting work, but you
also have to be patient about where youre going with all that started work.
People who talk faster tend to be more impatient in nature.
Have patience for:

Screenwriting
Drawing Comics
Publishing Comics
Finishing Scripts
Finishing Comics
Detail Dense Drawing
Webcomics

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Web Publishing
Any Project
Parallax Development
Writing Scenes
Thumbnails
Storyboards

I need to stop wasting my time figuring out how to do something or become something or
someone. Whatever Im going to become one day, I already have the skills to achieve. No
education needed. Just work. And just exploration of the skills that I already know how to
do at various levels. I dont need to learn how to be an animation writer. I already am a
screenwriter, and any time spent and wasted investigating How to write for animation
is actually really just time I could have instead spent doing the very thing I mistakenly
wanted to learn how to do! I already know how. Its a matter of doing it, not knowing
how. Now, with screenwriting and drawing and storytelling, the How aspect is
irrelevant. The Action element is much more necessary. Ive already mastered the
fundamentals and basics of writing. All I really need now is the confidence to get started
and continue starting each week. I dont need to know How to do any of the things I do
full time. Ive master the foundations and fundamentals of art storytelling and
screenwriting. From this point on, no more learning, studying, or researching. From now
on, Im only allowed to act and take action.
I have How to Write for Animation by Jeffrey Scott pretty much memorized by heart.
How to Write an Animation / Film / or TV Script:
1.
2.
3.
4.
5.
6.

Premise/Synopsis
Outline
Beats/Scenes/Cuts (scene to scene)
Writing, Rewriting, and Revising
Final Draft
Submission to Agent/Producer/Agency

Just finished writing a brief scene. The Burglary, about a robbery that goes wrong, or is
that, right?
Either way, its a finished beginner scene outline, short but sweet. Its got conflict and
action from the moment the burglar enters the picture.
Writing scenes is easy. The more you write scenes, the more long the scenes will get and
the more complex their rhythm and narration will become.
Most scenes in screenwriting are situational. Theyre based on the events, cause, conflict,
emotions, actions, and outcome of a (just about any) given fictional situation or scenario
at any given location.

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Sunday, November 20th, 2011,

This thing of mine, me working on my scripts and comics, on the computer, in so-called
real time in front of a live haxored internet audience of a lot of people cant possibly be
that bad for business, can it??
Yes? Okay then. Well, its time I adjusted my daytime and nighttime schedule I suppose.
Now that Im actually doing the work, I should probably save it for around noon to 4 p.m.
The evening can get a bit chaotic, and Im coming down from my energy drink fix, so
yeah. Noon-ish, if I write at all that is.

And now, my good God friend, Joseph, you know the true meaning of what it means to
be an adult, now that youre there finally: Youre pathetic, your work sucks, youre an
asshole, and youre life is the opposite of how you dreamed it would turn out. Enjoy the
other 28 years that remain of your life. Nothin prophetic. Nothing sadistic. Just cold,
hard, depressing truth. These are the things we never tell children about success, because
they literally cant handle it. It breaks their hearts to find out there is no Santa, and there
is no God, and there is no real compassion or understanding among humanity, even in the
most cultured and oldest of climates. God Bless America! Lets face it, my newly
acquired experiential wisdom and professionalism is turning me into something a bit less
youthful, a bit more cynical and jaded about the ways of the world. Ive now BEEN to
the top of the mountain, and it kind of sucks, when you consider what you have to do to
get there. Same with Heaven.

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Chapter 48
(Windows XP)

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Monday, November 21, 2011,

Im not trying to sound like H.P. Lovecraft. But the thing is, I kind of write like H.P.
Lovecraft and draw like Eugene Delacroix, without even attempting or trying to do so.
Mono in some ways, with his black overcoat and mysterious mystical magical powers in
a way is like something out of Lovecraft, but I was never reading Lovecraft when I
created my main conceptual work. I read his work way before that. Years, actually.
Before the Internet and www era, when someone disappeared from your life, they
disappeared from your life. Completely. Forever. The internet makes it way too easy to
find and contact people you used to know. Before the internet, if I hadnt seen a friend for
a while, if I fell out of touch with them, or if they moved or disappeared from my life or
something, Id wonder Whatever happened to him/her. Now all you have to do is
Google people and it shows almost anyone online.
Im definitely a bit of a mute, and suffer from mutism, even to this day when my family
says something to me, Ill forget how to say something, anything really, in response to
those words. I forgot how to speak when Cary was trying to get my attention while I was
on the computer, and that mutism happened not even 30 minutes ago.
Im a silent mute, just as my mother is to this day. And my mutism invokes much verbalemotional wrath and abuse from my father and brother, Cary and Andrew, even to this
day. Theyll scream at me and call me names, just for not talking when they try to make
me talk.
I dont much care for the sound of conformists and normal sheep talking. Floridians
talking. Dialogue on comedy shows. Dialogue in commercials. Not sure which kind of
talking sounds I hate the most. I just hate the general sound of normal and/or annoying
conversation. Makes me fucking sick to my stomach.
I really honestly dont care how charismatic, well liked, beloved, or popular I am. Im not
any of those things in Hollywood or comics. Im a man on a mission. I dont have time
for that kind of bullshit, social relationship bullshit. Im here to create action. Thats
pretty much it. Im not here in Hollywood, animation, or comics to make friends. I
wouldnt know how. But I am here to make books and maybe cinema of tall order.
Things to wait for, patiently:
Daily outline practice, by hand and comp.
Book orders
Email messages
I want to make a Mono: The Black Swordsman Trade Paperback, or Chapter Book or
Tome. I want to work on 1 Chapter at a time, written with some of the outlinesthat Ive
already inventedfirst. Nothing has to be set in stone, but I am going to have to do some
more Outlines and panel thumbnails and inks if I ever want to get this ting going. I need

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to get started now, or soon, or it probably wont happen. But I need more reference
material and story thumbnails / story sketches, Outlines, and maybe scripts. Or no scripts.
I dont think Jhonen ever wrote a script for Nny anyway. So forget scripts Joe, for the
time being. Focus on 1 Chapter. Complete 1 Chapter and work my way up to 20
Chapters. Thats 1 200-pg Book. A graphic novel. The story would kind of dilly dally, I
want the art and writingboth of themto be as sloppy as possible. That way this ideal
book will actually get made. Im not out to make a perfect comic book anymore. Just a
comic book.
Im just going to stop planning and follow my cartoonist instincts. Im following the
Jhonen production philosophy. The Horatio Alger Idiot Production Philosophy: 10 pgs of
sketchbooks, a lot of sharpies, pens, small paper, and lots of tape and scissors. No actual
official professional script. Just some random outlines with verbs and dialogue, then
develop those literary narrative concepts a little, and finally, flesh them out.
From now onnot counting animation and general fictionwhen it comes to writing
comics, Outlines and Scene Beginnings-Endings are my scripts.
Solo Comics-Making is like Hollywood and Asian filmmaking, and filmmaking is like
driving a car. Empowering. Powerful. Dangerous. Loud. And hard to take command of.
And yet regardless, the Director of the film still must somehow take the wheel, and sit in
the Drivers Seat, and maneuver the automobile to its intended destination. Thats a lot of
power at your hands, under your control. Not all cars are steered successfully. And some
full on crash. That is what its like making movies. Or its like steering a ship. Shifting
Direction and Setting a Course is Slow and at times Painstaking. And there are a lot of
lives in your hands, relying on you not to drown them. Filmmaking is a vehicle. To talk
of doing it all solo is to speak madness, which is not to say its impossible. But it
certainly sounds like speaking the impossible. Coordinating a visual narrative takes the
establishment of a visual and narrative Storytelling System. Its not an easy thing to do.
It takes many key components: A Theoretical Framework; A Solid Comprehension of
Foundational and Fundamental Art Skills such as Anatomy and Perspective; An
Organic Comprehension of Scene Structure, and Visual Narrative; A Filmmakers Eye
and Intuition, and a way to Integrate all of those things into an Organic and Cohesive
Whole.
Comics Storytelling Components

Visualization (Manifesting the Panel, Page, and Structural background,

movement, and character design art)
Composition
Pencils
Shading
Background (Layout, Perspective, Light and Shade)
Shot Transitions (Moment to Moment, Action to Action, Scene to Scene)
Camera Shots (Close, Medium, Wide)
Camera Angles (Low, Medium, High, Oblique, Aspect)

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Developing A Visual Comics Storytelling System

I want to compose all individual issues of all my comics the same way. Get a good pace
going, get a good personal storytelling and visualization system up, then keep it
suspended, and pace it through time, the narrative, from Outline to Outline, Scene to
Scene, Story to Story, Character Dialogue to Character Dialogue, Action Scene to Action
Scene, much like Evangelion, or Blade of the Immortal, or Spawn, or Akira. All these
prototypes serve as excellect examples to the kind of dynamic, cinematic, and intense
pacing Im talking about. If you can keep it going for one issue, and your foundation is
strong enough, then like I did with basic writing and Manifesto, you can keep the
narrative flowing, keep it in the flow state. But the book need not be drawn from start to
finish. Thats more myth than fact. Its okay to skip ahead. The Key is to develop the
system of story and art construction until it becomes a thing, a flow, a continuous
narrative flow constructed from nothing, from the ground up, and then merely keep the
ball rolling, and keep the story of the narrative progressing through pictorial and visual
images.

Elements of New Style:

Black Panels; Notan Panels; Black BG.
Aspect Shots (Hands, Feet, Eye, Props)
For now I can just practice these two styles.

Tuesday, November 22, 2011,

You know, just because some artists can draw good illustrations, one-page sketches,
design pages, and cover imagery, doesnt automatically mean they have instant talent for
drawing sequential art. Those are two separate fields. Thats like assuming that because
you can drive a car, you can drive a plane, too, just because you know how to drive a car.
Drawing sequential art is a separate, distinct, and hard to learn talent that goes on top of
basic drawing. Its much easier to make cynical 1-page illustrations than it is to make
cynical comic book pages. When you draw comics, your true soul comes out onto the
page. All your deepest, truest abilities as a narrator, storyteller, and filmmaker are laid
bare, on the page. You get to see what and who you really are, for better and worse.
I seem to have finally developed a Sequential Art Style System thats could very well
carry me through the process of drawing entire comic book 20 page issues.
Style System: It is the secret sauce of a comic book page. Or a manga page: Its DNA.
When Im not revising my own comic pages, I want to revise other comic book pages.

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November 22nd Marks the birth of my own Style System; my own secret ingredient; my
own secret recipe. Is this element teachable? Its tough to tell. But I do know its an
incredibly powerful technique and production methodology. Its my narrative style, my
storytelling style: My province.
If I can ever get a hold of the webmaster, Im shutting my webcomics site down. Not
joking either. This is no way to do business. After all that Ive been through, all the
rejection Ive faced, I think Im finally starting to realize, maybe my comics werent
meant to be public, or public spectacles. Commercials and TV shows promoting them be
damned. Maybe my comics were meant to be private and intimate, like my writing. Id be
happy if I could go back to that way of living, before everything went all wrong. And
Chaotic: Marillian Invasion and Yu-Gi-Oh 5Ds went off the air. Such a sad day it was the
day I woke up and realized those shows didnt exist anywhere anymore other than on my
laptop and homemade DVD collection, but never got an official DVD release. Now all
there is, is that Pony crap. Bah humbug. Boring. I miss when people liked me. I miss
having stuff to watch on TV every day. I miss anime being on Cartoon Network. I miss
when people looked up to me instead of pitied me, and when people had faith,
confidence, and trust in me. Now I have none of those things. I dont even have a
paycheck other than out of government providence. My government check.

Me, and the Justice Friends, with my trusted and powerful friends and Tweet Allies
Roger Ebert, Neil Gaiman, Jill Thompson, Voldemort, Faith Erin Hicks, The Crow, Seth
McFarlane, and Todd McFarlaneshall clean up this world yet!

Friday, November 25, 2011,

From now on Im leaving my Roku on automatic playback. Ill just leave my system
running and set to Play, even when Im not there. Currently streaming Halo Legends. So
far its just so-so, so Im kind of leaving it playing in my bedroom-studio, and just
watching parts of it on and off. That way there might be more incentive for the TV
bigwigs to leave good stuff going too, instead of all these long ass intermissions of filler
shows the networks seem to love so much. Primetime material should be played on air
24/7. Theres certainly enough quality content to make that happen. Networks shouldnt
slow down for viewers. Keep going even when your favorite viewers arent around.
Pretend like you dont need viewers, pretend like you dont need anybody. Thats what I
do.

There is a lot of creative and artistic value to martial arts form, flexible anatomy, and
choreographed freestyle midair acrobatics.

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List of NEW Things I Like: Influence, authority, power, systems, building, designing,
constructing, engineering, inventing, reconfiguring, configuring, manifesting, starting, finishing,
continuing, enduring, patience, waiting, discipline, willpower, endurance, energy, style,
filmmaking, authoring, narrating, storytelling, constructing, money, paychecks, spending,
window-shopping, eating, fighting, working out, choreographing, daydreaming about fighting,
anime, martial arts, production, co-production, inking, filling in with digital ink, reading,
studying, learning, teaching, analyzing, strategizing, intuiting, guessing, making things up, magicmaking, traveling, escaping, reinventing (myself), achieving, recognition.

Saturday, November 26, 2011

In martial arts, the key to fast upper and lower body strikes is relaxation. The more you
tense up, the slower your strike will be. Neuromuscular contraction reduces the speed and
efficiency of a strike, whether its a punch or a kick, or any other kind of blow. Being
mad while fighting will only slow down your movement if your muscles are tense. The
key is to learn to control your muscle and nerve expansion and contraction.
Martial Arts are an art, a career, and a life. It has so many different varied elements, so
many varieties, schools, and terms. Its a great way to stay in shape, and a great form of
self-defense and training. It also helps with health and flexibility, among dozens of other
things, like awareness, speed, strategy, mindfulness, relaxation, and health.
When practicing martial arts, tai chi, and Shaolin Kung-Fu, it is important to start off
easy and slow, and familiarize oneself with the philosophy and mental principles behind
the art of martial combat.
For instance, my punches and kicks are finally beginning to show some speed and force,
and finally improve, without me having to release too much force, energy, and effort. My
muscles dont tighten and tense up as much. The more your muscles tense up while
performing moves, essential strikes, the more quickly you will tire yourself out as a
fighter.
Tai Chi helps with gracefulness of movement and form, and fluidity of form in motion.
Tai Chi is essentially control of energy flow.

Writing Science-Fiction, Fantasy, and Science-Fantasy, is a master builders dream come

true. Speculative Fiction (SF and Fantasy) appeals to the master builder in all writers,
artists, and storytellers, because every fantasy and SF world that exists is a world that had
to be built by its authors and designers from the ground up. Its something built from
nothing. My guide to writing science fiction and fantasy, that book, came in the mail
yesterday, Friday. Its written by Orson Scott Card. Writing speculative fiction appeals to
the desire to make everything up about the narrative you write. Speculative fiction
writing looks really hard and complex on the surface, very developed and systematic, and
it is, but its not as hard as I used to think it was. Once you learn the basics of speculative
fiction writing in general, the general archetype of mythology, storytelling, and world-

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building, things get considerably easier. You get to make up the rules, histories,
populations, species, descriptions, events, and laws, and you have a considerable amount
of freedom when building a speculative fiction world from the ground up.
Theres a difference between dense world building (Star Wars, Robert E. Howard, Akira,
Blade Runner) and thin-layer world building (something with more realistic formalism).
You know what? I think Im going to have to let one of my main dreamsof being a
producer or storyboard artist in a traditionally based television animation studio, like how
youd picture a assembly line animation studio system to look like in the 90sgo and
drift off into the distance, over the horizon. Say good bye to that dream in particular. Not
because its a bad dream or I want it any less, but because that vision, that type of idealize
work climate Phil worked in, probably doesnt even exist anymore, and if it does, the
politics and cultural aspects have shifted and evolved into something unknowable and
different, primarily because of Asians and girls. It used to be a bunch of 45 year old guys
in glasses and Hawaiian shirts. No longer my friend.
Im beginning to go into extensive technical detail about the fictional world of NewEarth. Im even thinking of going into so much depth describing New earth that Ill
probably eventually publish a 200+ page book that does absolutely nothing other than go
into every last nano-detail about the history, civilization, and physical description of the
planet New-Earth. It will be a world building book. It would be a book about the
Apocalypse, and the regenerative societies who survive it and go on to build the
civilization of New-Earth. It would kind of be sort of like an Encyclopedia of a
Speculative Fiction World.

Sunday, November 27, 2011,

Impossible Professions and Fields
Speculative Fiction Novelist (SF and fantasy)
Engineer
Author
Filmmaker
Broadcaster
Inventor
Technologist
Production Designer (Architect)
Painter
Business Owner
Self-Publisher
Martial Artist
Expatriate
Choreographer
Investor (online trading)

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Impossible, You need an education, You have to be a genius, You need to know
math, You need to study classes at a University Youll never succeed in that field
You need to be in shape, It takes a special kind of person to do that. Not you.
I used to hear these kinds of discouraging statements from family, friends, teachers, and
authority figures all the time. If I would have believed the hype about how hard it is to
become one and if I wasnt given the chance to experiment, make mistakes, and explore
on my own, independently in my studies and be self taught, I probably never would have
made progress or had success, or became anything in any of those fields. The key
learning and achievement word here is exploration, and experimentation. Sometimes the
only thing motivating you is the fact that everyone is telling you no and doubting you. I
know that motivated me.

Take your time. Have patience. Dont be impatient. Wait. Wait it out. Dont panic. Take
it one day at a time. Sit around and do nothing. Let things come as they may. Allow
healing time. Your time will come. Success will not come right away. Have some Faith.
Dont act on the pressures and impatience of rivals and others. Outwait your enemies and
rivals. Know that all good things will come to you in time, and you will be rewarded after
a lifetime of patience and waiting. Slow it down. Stop hurrying about everywhere and
hurrying to do everything. Real writers dont do first drafts. They patiently re-write until
the time is ready when the work reaches closure and completion And many more
Thats one of the main solutions. Listen to that advice. Thats one of the key missing
ingredients of my arsenal of skills and abilities. Have the patience to wait for a better
tomorrow without flipping out, bugging people, panicking, or losing my temper.
Things that take a ton of patience, and that take a talent for patience.

Developing skill
Waiting for inspiration
Drawing detail
Drawing in general
Starting and finishing a novel
Starting and finishing a script
Starting and finishing a graphic novel
Starting and finishing a series bible
Working on Photoshop
Exercise
Getting in shape
Losing Weight
Martial Arts
Stretching

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Drawing well is actually an enormous test of patience for a person like me. One of the
greatest there is. One of the greatest there will ever be.
Thats the Achilles Heel of many, if not all of my rivals, both famous and infamous. They
lack patience. They lack the patience to wait for me to actually finish whatever it is Im
doing at the moment. They want my reaction, quote, presence, or thought and they want
it NOW! Even when theyre speech is as abusive as it is. Sorry. Doesnt work that way.
Zen teaches us the wisdom of the Buddha, and the Buddha was the most patient
individual, historic figure, and sage in the history of the world. The Sage, or The Wise
Man has the wisdom and experience of enduring years of abuse, rejection, and has
patience. Lack of patience can easily lead to instantaneous rejection and anger.
Sometimes even homicidal rage. Bryan for example, is not patient. Hes the opposite of
that. Hes incredibly impatient. Same with Viacom. Theyre impatient as Hell and the
Devil Himself, and therefore are guided by the Devil. I can out-wait those guys in a
heartbeat. The internet also encourages youthful impatience and lack of wisdom in many
instances.

There is:

The patience to stay quiet, silence, mute, and invisible for long periods of time
The patience to wait for the day to end
The patience to wait for rest and sleep to arrive
The patience to not mettle and interfere in others affairs
The patience to wait for moments of suffering and discomfort to end and be over
with
The patience to endure Andrews impatience/wrath/anger and hatred. Hes quite
impatient.

Patience is the Ultimate Waiting Game. Its also made obvious no just in what you do,
but also in what you DONT do and CHOOSE not to do. Me publishing too early would
be an act of impatience. If I were to keep doing that, it would reflect poorly on me,
because my work would as a result of impatience look rushed, sloppy, shaky, unstable,
and amateurish, with no polish. I know all about my public impatient side
Embarrassing. Its embarrassing when I act out of haste, and dont show or practice the
proper patience. I sense thats going to change in the near future though.
Mainstream media and the internet definitely are friend-enemies. Though there is a
certain amount of tolerance, both media blacklist each other in their respective fields.
And the rivalry doesnt look to end any time soon. The Viacom vs. Google fiasco was
probably one of the most notable aspects of this animosity. To say nothing of the
Uncyclopedia write up on all the mainstream stuff.

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People who are having problems waiting to see me succeed in art:

Cousin Mike
Chris my friend
Darnell
CidtheKitty

Jeez. I guess I didnt realize how impatient many of my supporters and fans are. Maybe
they get it from me, and my own original impatience I used to cherish.
People I encounter on a daily basis, in person:

Andrew
Cary
Peggy
Baby (pet cat)
Jake and Sam (pet cats)
Neighbors I always hear through wall

I just realized, theres a reason I often hate my brother and many of my neighbors.
Unintentionally, Im projecting rejected aspects of myself onto them, whether its peace
of mind about sex, which Ive pretty much given up on, or peace of mind about criticism,
ridicule, or mocking and insulting others. I have no interested in sex and rejecting others,
therefore thats all I ever see in their words. All I see is nymphomania and irreverence in
my brother. And all I ever see in my neighbors who live next to where I live is bullying,
insults, and negativity. Im projecting rejected aspects of my psyche onto them. Kinda
weird. Im not interested in sex on any kind of deep level, and Im not interested in
putting others down. Those two parties do enough of that as it is.
People in my life, but not as often
Tweeters
Anthony
Jinnel
Beth
Chris
Jean
Lynn
The ASMB
Jhonen
The mailman
Jo Ann L. Cook
Nicole (Jo Anns office)
Relatives
Bryant
Donna

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Darnell
Guinevere Dr.

Impatience = Low Quality Artwork, Low Quality Comics

Patience = Hyper Detail, Better Comics Pages
Focus, Hyper-Focus, Energy = Successful Art
And on an academic note, all these books on comic book making theory havent actually
helped me make more comics for the most part, with rare exceptions of using a trace here
and a systematic theory there. The real learning is only going to be in the doing. Its time
to get my fucking nose out of that academic comics How-To Make Them book and just
draw some panels and provide some artwork, either drawn into the panels or drawn
separately and cut out / taped to the page / scannedor a combination of both. Execution
is its own teacher. Execution is a professor unto itself. I know it has been for me.
Bottom Line: I cant stay in theoretical talking mode forever. Not if I ever want to
actually have any sort of career in comics. Sooner or later Ive got to take action, which
will bring me out of my comfort zone. Either way, theres no escaping real work.
Things Im working on:

Writing Speculative Fiction Scripts

Writing Poetically
Drawing Comics
Developing Patience
Painting

How to Make a Comic Book Page (Manufactured Indie Assembly Line Style)
1. Pick out a Mono Page from my Mono Archives to use in a full composition
2. Pick one of my production design drawings to put Mono cut-out in front of
3. Photocopy Mono print
4. Cut out Mono contour from step no. 1
5. Tape Mono cutout onto Background Production Design
6. Scan taped image
7. Edit cut-and-pasted image in black and white scan, and make background black
with fill in tool on Photoshop
8. Print final version

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9. Voila! Full Composition with character and Background

10. Fit composition to panel with Manga Studio Pro (purchase this software)
11. Repeat each step until all panels on page are filled up and fitted with taped CGI
images

I have my own camera now. Its hidden in my cell phone. Pretty awesome. Now I can
take pictures of people and things and forward the good ones to my email and
photobucket.

Technically, one or more of my best comic book pages are digitally composited collages,
much like how Jhonen edits comics, or at the very least did at one point.
I should try

The same Mono image on a variety of backgrounds

The same background with a variety of Mono images.

Try different compositing combinations and see which one turns out best.
Its Parallax, the Arts & Crafts Episode! Boring I know, but still pretty awesome.
Like these pages, theres a good chance that with all my upcoming pages, the background
and perspective is going to need to be drawn on a separate sheet of paper than the
characters, props, and foreground. This technique is generally known as compositing.
Many comic book artists dont use the compositing technique, but its a necessary
component of the animation process, and the live action filmmaking process in
mainstream filmmaking for the most part. Its easy to create a lot of detail through
compositing, by using that technique.

My mind lit up when I heard Jim Cameron say this in the Visionaries Documentary on
OWN Network that I was watching with my Mom earlier this evening:
Fortune favors the prepared
-James Cameron
Im one of the first real breakout superstars of the internet generation, who grew up in the
90s and was a teenager of the first decade of the 2000s. Things like Parallax, Mono, and
New-Earth dont happen overnight. No amount of media hype can make something as big
as those things and Manifesto happen overnight. Thats just not done no matter how

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much you fake it with shallow TV or print or internet hype. Im one of the youngest
established auteurs of the mainstream and new media there is! Im a first generation
digital internet comic book auteur. Everyone else is either a lot older or nonexistent, or on
DeviantART. You dont really hear much from my generation, if my generation actually
exists, that is.
Times when it pays to have patience:
Professional

Anything Art-Related / When sketching new art, and cleaning it up and editing it.
When adding details to drawings (not letting my mind go blank)
When writing a scene
When writing a chapter of a book
When writing the first draft (and revisions) of a script
For exercise
Growing facial hair
Painting

Personal

If someone is testing my patience or saying rude things

When Andrew blows up (I forgive him)

Drawing Cloaks
In terms of how I draw Mono, his coat is a lot like a mixture of an exaggerated anime
trenchcoat (like Seto Kaibas, a cape (like Batmans or Spawns), and a more traditional
Tolkien-esque free-flowing cloak, enshrouded in shadows half the time, and other times a
stylized silhouette. Monos costume has its own soul. A personality all its own, just like
his swords and firearms. Im getting more used to doing a drawing over quickly or at
least more promptly if Im not happy with the initial drawing or first draft, as I like to
refer to it. Honestly, in my world Im designing, just about all loose cloth, edges, or flares
all take on a free-flowing cloak-ish personality. To me this is just very cool. Ive thought
it was cool ever since I saw Todd McFarlane draw cloaks that way when I was 13 years
old in middle school. Changed my whole perception of how fabric appears on page or on
screen and how it can be rendered and drawn.
Made a New Breakthrough in my Art Detailing Today. Another rooftop composition

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I spent the entire day and evening working on this piece. Where does the time go. I was
actually patient with my approach to this one for a change. I used quite a few layers of
detailing and texturing on this one. The costume, the moon, the stars in the sky, the
building, the gun, the body and the sword. I had to work on each one individually. Todd
McFarlane would probably approve, Id like to redo the hatch shading textures on the
building though. Kind of sloppy sharpie brushwork, even though sharpie isnt exactly a
brush. Its a marker pen. But still, overall, quite decent in terms of the big picture of my
vision.
And yknow what? Yes, Im proud of the piece above, but I must admit I always
suspected I was capable of producing art of this level of detail or higher, if given enough
time to work mostly in isolation or quietly under the radar. Its when Im in the spotlight
online that I have trouble drawing at this level (or higher). Even after all Ive been though
Im still very shy and intimidated and afraid of the spotlight and the pressures of success.
The more patience I have with my drafting and polishing process, the more happy with
the level of my art Ill be. In terms of Speculative Fiction Art Illustration, this is probably
my best, most focused piece yet. I cant stop looking at it. It was influenced by some of
Jhonen Vasquez and Todd McFarlanes fancier illustrations in their books. I didnt really
use manga or anime as a reference on this one. It has a kind of Expressionism-Ballistics
vibe to it. Like Meatwad once said That was VIOLENT. And magical.
Words that come to mind when I think of todays best drawing:

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Stylistic
Progressive
Experimental
Detailed
Ballistics
Swordsman
Cloak
Ink
Heavy
Laborious
Fantastic
Gothic
Science-Fiction
Mysterious
Masculine
Aggressive

Drew some hands and feet just a few minutes ago.

Also, drew a skyscraper and its windows, all black with white windows, partially by
hand (windows), partially by computer (the black building).
Gelly Roll Gel Pens are good for drawing the glowing lights of a city, or the stars in a
black midnight sky. That and noir and notan black & white light and shade.
Im growing more and more computer/color-paint-friendly. I have all the time in the
world to practice in that province. I figure why not?
Everyones so accustomed to drawing with black lines and shapes on a white canvas.
Now that I have art supplies, I figure, why not do or try the opposite for a while every so
often. Experiment with white shapes, shadows, lines, and forms on a black canvas.
Art Supplies List:

Black Pictorio Gekko Paper

Red Wausau Paper
Ruler
Angle Ruler
White Ink Gelly Roll Gel Pen
Multi-Colored Gel Pen

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Black
I learned something today. Black & White or macabre Comic Books, for the most part
even Famously Blackhearted books like Sin City, Cerebus, Johnny the Homicidal
Maniac and Spawnarent Black enough. They can always use more Black. That color
is like crack to me, I cant get enough of it. Its like an illegal drug or something. Every
time I see a comic book, open it up, and browse through it, including every comic I own,
I keep asking myself Where the Hells the Black?! More Deep Shadows, More Deep
Black, More Power! Its not Powerful enough. Its never powerful enough. Never Black
enoughespecially nowadays. It doesnt have to be a Hollywood Horror Movie just to
be Deep Black. That notion is ridiculous. Spawn The Original Animated Series was black
enough for me. One of the rare instances where a comic related-property Was Black
Enough. Just like Metal can never be Metal Enough. Black can never be Black Enough.
NEVER! Fuck You for thinking otherwise!

JM Brand Prophecy: Future Predictions:

The Birth of the Black Anime, Dark Anime, or Anime Noir-Expressionism

genre (originally predicted by Katsuhiro Otomo, creator of Akira, in Hipira)

Science-Fiction and Fantasy Merging more commonly into Science-Fantasy

Asian Cinema (Choreography, Camerawork, Story) Dominating the American

Cinema Market

Rise of the Eurasian Television Episodic Co-Production (France, Japan, America)

Birth & Rise of the American-Creator Manga Market

Intense and Beautifully filmed/choreographed American Action Cartoons

dominating traditional cable TV (Star Wars, Generator Rex, Avatar, Thundercats,
Teen Titans)

Rise of the Digital Content HTPC and the Merging of TVs and Computers.

More movies like Tintin and James Camerons Avatar being made in Hollywood

Communication and Information being Transparent and Transmitted a Lot Easier

Rise of Globalism, and a more Global, International Peace Culture

Growth of Mixed Media

Rise of the French Comic Book and Chinese-Korean Anime Industry

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I will check each one off as it is fulfilled in my lifetime, or beyond it.

ADREW: You LIVE in the Matrix. Joe LIVES in the Matrix. Youre SO lucky you got
Mom and Dad to look out for you and protect you from the real world. God forbid Joe
has to live in the real world.
JM: Whatever, ANDREW. Maybe, or is it just that youre jealous I have things so much
easier than you, I dont have to live in this realm of existence if I dont want to, and that
youre incredibly jealous that I HAVE the creative and intellectual power to invent my
own world to live in. Im detecting some jealousy here.
ANDREW: No. Youre just sheltered.
Unfortunately such a lifestyle isnt possible in a Red State AND Police State like Florida.
What a dick. I forgive him for his demeaning, impatient, and shortsighted put-downs
though. I always do. Your castle of ignorance is forgiven Andrew. So sayeth the JM.
He also said things like You cant have that much to write about. No apparently I CAN
have that much to write about seeing as Im the most prolific writer in the world of this
generation.

Thursday, December 01, 2011,

Apparently, Andrew now has a second child on the way. My niece. Pretty cool. Well,
after Andrew became a father the first time, nothing really phases me after that, including
being the uncle of a niece. Were pretty sure Andrews second kid will be female. Shes
not born yet. Still a while until that happens. Im actually pretty surprised. The Alberts
household is very male-centric. The testosterone in this house has been its most
dominant element, what with me, Andrew, and Cary. I really dont care one way or the
other. Im not gender-biased like a lot of people are, unless being a macho man counts as
gender biased.

Though I do try to practice Zen at all times, I am not always calm, cool, and collected.
Not that I snap at people, but I am known to lose my cool and temper every so often.
Sometimes theres just a lot of pressure in the air.
I think its a generally acknowledge and agreed upon fact among the top Titans and
Players of Industryin TV, literature, and comicsgenerally agree, that the road to get
to the very top, is a Long, Painful, Difficult One, that automatically has a lot of hazardous
failure pitfalls, with rare exceptions. Drawing is always going to feel uncomfortable,
strenuous, and exhausting for me, just like non-drawing work and exercise does feel as

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well. Its the same feeling. Thats never going to change. I need to realize losing weight
and practicing art, generally, and for the most part, create the same feeling of anxiety and
discomfort, but both have their benefits, and I dont think Ill ever completely quit on
either of them. Im sure Ill go days and weeks and maybe even months without every so
often, but Ill never quit, work-wise, or career-wise.
I find doing daily exercise, martial arts, and physical fitness help stimulate endorphins,
which make starting drawing easier. The real challenge of art, is getting the boost to start
drawing, which can be enhanced by exercise and 5-Hour Energy.
Its impossible to please everybody. Its impossible to please all people and make all
people happy. Sometimes its tough enough to please anybody, let alone everybody. Art
is subjective. Which means theres automatically going to be people that hate it and
people that like it. No piece of artbe it novel, painting, computer painting, illustration,
TV show, cartoon, anime, comic book, movie, or mangais universally liked. No matter
how hard you work, no matter how you draw, what subject matter you choose, and no
matter how detailed your style is, it will always be disliked by someone, if not a whole
group of people. Universally objective, and universally liked art is impossible. No one
like everything, and everything is like by no one.
Somehow, I have to get over the hurt drawing traditionally can sometimes cause my
wrist, arms, and hand. Because it takes muscle to draw, sometimes the muscles in my
arm, wrist, and hand stiffen, detracting from the quality of my process. I think as long as
Im aware of how my hand and arm feel, at least being a little aware of the pain would
make it conquerable.
The Creative Momentum
With my career, its damned if you do and damned if you dont. If I keep trying, I just get
laughed at, and if I quit, the momentum of my so-called Career keeps pressuring me to
continue. Whether I continue or quit, I lose. Or win. Whatever. Its like no matter what I
do, I still end up going against the military tank of my own Scorpio and Master Builder
Momentum. So even if Im not doing a show, or a comic, comics and shows continue to
manifest that are based off of and strongly resemble mine in certain aspects. Its insane.
Some of this other work by anonymous people is pretty good. Other works are horrible.
Either way, my destiny is unavoidable, and impossible to ignore or forget. My career,
work, and style have their own planetary magnetic gravitational pull. The pull toward my
destiny is magnetic. But its not easy to live up to, not get overwhelmed by, and not get
depressed and panicked about if Im not feeling up to it. Its like trying to stop a planets
rotation. Its so big and so powerful, it just keeps rotating, turning, and moving, and
evolving even when Im not present, or am a passive observer. People hold me
responsible for all these crappy shows, and yet I dont have any control or say so in the
actual tangible process. Im never consulted over who I influence. I cant go one hour of
watching television without seeing something that reminds me of all this on an A) Literal,
B) physical, C) Intuitive , or D) Creative (and intellectual) level. I get criticism regardless
of all this, actually I probably get criticism because of it. But why do I get penalized for
having a creative and personal magnetism I have no control over?

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God is the Supreme Consciousness, the source of the creative field of energy.
-God, Energy, and the Field
God is the source of all creative, filmmaking, literary, graphic, storytelling, scientific, and
artistic power. God gave man the energy, freedom, and power to do and create all these
things. Power is God. God is Power. If you want to attain Power, you are really seeking
to attain God, because God bestows all these things on the universe. God also gives us the
tools: Resources, supplies, patience, energy, strength, health, determination, discipline,
willpower, and Faith to tolerate the process leading up to the manifestation of great art
and science. I used to separate Faith from Art, that is, until I realized theyre much
MORE powerful if theyre integrated. Every time I sketch, draw, trace, cleanup, ink,
paint, digitally edit, digitally paint, or revise and redraft, Im communing with God. Its
like meditation.
Art and writing is how I commune with God. That also goes for praying and meditation.

Saturday, December 03, 2011

Editing together some practice compositions

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In a way, these compositions dont look digital. They all look hand drawn. They all have
a lot of detail and fill up the whole page. Wow, not bad. Compositing actually works. Its
much easier to fill up pages digitally and automatically with pre-existing art. Its not
manga, and its not anime, and its not 3-D CGI, so I guess its just regular old comics.
Its been pretty amazing seeing what I can do with Photoshop Elements 7, just by reading
some brief tutorials.
Ive also started doing experimental drawings with white gel ink pen on black paper
experimenting with a pre-existing all-black canvas, in the genre of Notan, Noir, and
Expressionism.
So what kind of stuff is there to create with a white pen on black paper? Cityscapes, Sin
City, JTHM, Blade Runner / Syd Mead, End Times covers. I can also do white paper
cutouts and composite them onto the black paper. I also need to scan the black paper and
see how a black and white scan of it looks.
Other than that, I need copy from pre-existing deep black compositions. Batman,
Miramax Logo, Sin City, Burton, Blade Runner, Priest, Akira, Ghost in the Shell, Karas,
Alien
In other words, Im planning on getting out my art software and art supplies,
experimenting, and just seeing what kind of visual design I can come up with.
Tools of my Trade:

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Photoshop Elements 7
Black Paper
White ink Sharpie Marker
Manga Studio EX
Products Produced (understructure):
Notan Illustrations (black paper)
Fully Dense Digitally Edited Compositions (Production Design) (old drawings)
Comic Book Page-Panel Arrangements (Manga Studio EX)

As a writer, I average around 1,000 words per day, every day, if not every other day. Id
probably end up with a lot more words than that if I didnt spend half the day with
family, watching TV, surfing the internet, and drawing.

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Chapter 49
(Windows XP)

P a g e | 175

Sunday, December 04, 2011,

Of all the Parallax folders I have, Ive created my densest and fattest, thickest, biggest
document yet, and is simply titled End Times: Prep-Work. The document is 230 pages
long. It contains everything but model sheets, layouts (production design), and
storyboards. Instead, the 230 pg. document contains scripts, outlines, scene outlines,
synopses, Third-Person Narration, illustrations and covers, and comic book page
layouts. Its my weightiest printed document since The Manifesto Series. End Times:
Prep-Work is what The Manifesto Series wishes it could be, at least in terms of finishing
Parallax. The titles I use for the Mono and New-Earth Franchise are interchangeable.
Sometimes I call the series Parallax. Sometimes I call it End Times. Both terms mean the
same thing. Ive realized that when I put pen or pencil to paper or finger to keyboard is
technically the time when I commune with my Inner-Power and Inner-Genius.
In terms of my digital life, Im more busy than Im typically comfortable actually
admitting: Writing books, writing documents, drawing comics, writing scripts, posting in
my blog, tweeting, posting on message board forums, viewing other peoples online art
and writing, updating my YouTube site, uploading artwork to my Photobucket account,
filling up sketchbooks. Keeping up with anime titles. I mean, I have free time, but not
much.

Monday, December 05, 2011,

Different video watching modes:

Live TV (DirecTV)
DVR Recordings
Roku (Netflix Instant, Hulu, Amazon-on-Demand, Anime TV, Crunchy Roll)
Laptop (Comp Screen; TV HDMI), (YouTube, Netflix Instant, Hulu, Crunchy
Roll, Cookie Jar, CW4Kids.com, Amazon-on-Demand, Toonzaki, ANN,
Funimation.com, Veoh)
Windows Media Video (Ripped WMV files)
Windows Media Center (DVDs, Live TV w/ TV Tuner)
TV DVD Player (DVD Collection)

Theres a larger variety of ways to watch anime/action/cartoon/drama/martial arts TV

shows, streaming video, and movies now.

In terms of the Myers Briggs Type Indicator Test, I seem to have gotten the best of both
worlds: 50/INTP & 50/INFP.

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The cool thing about Science Fiction Fantasy is its very tied to the NF/NP temperaments
Traditionally Speaking:
The pioneering Fantasy author pioneers were NFs
The pioneering Science Fiction authors were NTs
William Shakespeare was equal parts NT/NF
Leo Tolstoy: NF
Homer: NF
JRR Tolkien: INFP
Isaac Asimov: INTP
Leonardo da Vinci: INTP
Franz Kafka: INTP
NFs understand fantasy
NTs understand science and science-fiction
Those who know how to make science-fiction or fantasy know how to produce true
creativity. Science-Fiction Fantasy is kind of genre that combines both NT and NF
elements. Because my brain has elements of both, to me its no big deal to me to combine
the 2 genres, Science Fiction (SF) and Fatnasy into my own version of a sort of preexisting synthetic genre: Science-Fantasy.
The thing I like about science-fiction and also fantasy, but especially SF Science-Fantasy,
is that its a very creative genre. Science Fiction and Fantasy are the two most visual,
visually elaborate and denseand therefore artistic-creativegenres there are.
Vision = Creativity.
Visionary = Creative Genius
Art and Science-Fiction were not always considered complimentary in terms of public
perception. But people like me, and perhaps me alone, are working to change that in the
long run. Im amending the rules to the Creative-American Constitution.

Even though I dont have Corel Painter X yet, I do have the necessary supplies and
software to complete a successful script or minicomic in no time flat.

I have:

Pens

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Pencils
Acrylics
Erasers
Rulers
Printer Paper
Acrylic Canvas Paper
Storyboard Paper
Scanner
CeltX
Microsoft Word
Digital Image Pro
Photoshop Elements 7
Manga Studio EX 4

I have everything I need to continue my career. Maybe not an official website, but still,
plenty to start off with and keep myself busyI also have plenty of springboard material
in pages of pre-existing writing and artwork.

Manifesto (Series)
The Essays (Series)
Anime Megamix (Series)
YouTube Anime (Business Venture)
SplitAtomBoom (Network)
StreamWave Software; TV-DVD (Invention, Consumer Product)
Art, Manifested ([Art] Book)
End Times: The Prep Work (Anthology)
Mono (Character Archetype) (Saga)

Those are some pretty intensely innovative documents. Perfection takes time I suppose.
You cant rush perfection, and all that.
Art Manifested, at its peak, is perfect. Its a big book with a lot of detail on certain pages.
Im a perfectionist who strives for perfection, and at times I do reach it. I do realize that
perfection every so often in my art, literature, and multimedia projects.
In a way, all those projects mentioned above were great for training in my chosen field
and good for practice and training. But hopefully they are building up to something a bit
more polished and complete
Im not one to toot my own horn, but if you ask me, I might one day be one of the
greatest sci-fi fantasy animation writers of all time, in any subgenre or medium within,
but especially Action, Adventure, Drama, Serial, and the Supernaturally Macabre. I dont
know if my quality level as a Eurasian-American screenwriter can compete with other

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international screenwriters such as Yoshiyuki Tomino, John Woo, George Lucas,

Quentin Tarantino, and Dai Sato, but at the very least, I try, and Im helping to lay the
groundwork for a new generation of animation screenwriterand perhaps even one day,
anime screenwriters as well. I happen to value a good story and a well executed narrative
in animation quite a bit. The unfortunate truth about animation science fiction in the
United States is that, not a lot of it is written by people who have a dense scientific
knowledge, or by people with the brains of actual scientists, who are well versed in
science, whether its in theory or structural engineering and building (or as SF Writers
call it, World Building). On a certain level, because Im 50% INTP or engineer, half my
mind is that of a scientist. I have a large amount of scientific philosophical and
technological engineering knowledge. Im 50% prepared to write science-fiction
animation like no other before. Kind of like the people such as Ub Iwerks, George Lucas,
and Ed Katmul. I know computers and animation. Not just one or the other. And when
my generation comes of age, Ill probably really get a chance to shine and show the
world what Im actually made of, instead of just rotting away under my parents and
brothers domestic tyranny in my room all day.

Heres the info on my birthparents:

Glenis Ralph Sorrell:
Auto Manufacturer, Trappist Monk. English Eurasian-American. My Father: INFP.
Maryanne Gaynor:
Teacher. Fine Artist. Potential Writer. My Mother: INTP.
For some reason, while perusing certain anime websites, Im beginning to suspect some
of the anime fanbase is suspicious of me. They seem to think Im lucky for some reason
or another. If I am lucky, I dont feel lucky. Am I successful, powerful, famous, and
influential. Sort of, in some ways, but I really dont know how much luck factors into that
equation.
Yeah I slag on Japan sometimes, but am I sincere in my contempt. I kind of doubt it.
Mostly its motivated by jealousy, the fact that I dont get to live somewhere cool like
that. Its like the old Beavis and Butt-Head episode, Animation Sucks. The boys get a
class assignment to make and explore the wonders of animation as their teacher puts it.
They assume its easy to do, but when they actually put the work in, there are beat up,
exhausted, and defeated, and their work is pure shit. This failed attempt at making
animation leads Beavis and Butt-Head to make the irreverent proclamation Animation
Sucks! at the end of the school day. It reminds me of myself and my late youth in anime.
Any idiot can see that, that when most people take a stab at something, its primarily
motivated by the fact that they cant do it themselves.

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Unfortunately, this journal doesnt sound very Christmas-y as of late. Then again, whose
reading this thing that I never allowed to read it legally to begin with anyway? Whose
spying on me to make that kind of snap judgment to begin with anyone. Well, the people
who write over-reactionary statements on online forums about me, for one. I know the
people who hate me read this. But no one cares what they have to say. Seriously?
Seriously.

Being inspired by Andrew, Ive decided to make Monos 2 favorite types of handguns a
glock and a .45, with the former brand of firearm being inspired by my brothers aesthetic
gun choice. Mono also likes the Spas, machine guns, and shotguns. Because Mono is
somewhat inspired by not just myself, but also Andrew. I dont know what model of
sword Mono wields yet. Im less familiar with sword jargon than I am with gun jargon.
Gun jargon is fun to write about. Violence with guns is the bread and butter of popcorn
action movies like Pulp Fiction and The Matrix, true popcorn flicks. You can watch those
movies 50 times and youll still never get bored with them, just like Al Pacino, Edward
Norton, Jet Li, and Jason Statham. Steve Blum is going to have a lot of fun with Mono.
Im still in the process of researching ballistics. I think Ive got a while to go until I
master the art of firearm knowledge. But I am writing animation with mature themes, so I
guess its otay.

Wednesday, December 07, 2011,

I wonder why theres no animated crime film, or crime film animated series. The
Sopranos was a good TV show. Pulp Fiction was a good movie. The Godfather was a
good novel. Someone needs to write an animation script like that. Yazurai might be good.
The New-Earth Mafia.
Speaking of an animated Sopranos, I must admit, there was one element I found
disappointing about The Boondocks and Avatar, and the people who made those shows.
They like to insinuate and hint at things, without really being dedicated to any real actual
genre. They flirt with the concepts, but the actual intercourse never happens. Meaning,
Boondocks hints at the action, crime film, and martial arts genres, and executes that
element well, but at the end of the day, its stuck being a comedy, a very visually
elaborate sitcom, with good timing and pacing, but still just a sitcom. Same thing with
Avatar. They use martial arts for reference, they flirt with martial arts by incorporating
elements into it, but in reality, its like comparing a squirt-gun fight to a Core Yuen film.
Its a weaker sibling. There IS NO real comparison to the real thing, the real deal (Corey
Yuen choreography). No one commits to actual real fighting. Contact is never made. The
punches and kicks are blocked and thwarted. The violence is softened and castrated. It
never really connects. I can guarantee you if I had a show I wouldnt punk out on genre
commitment like those two shows do. I always found that noncommittal element pretty
annoying. You end up feeling like your watching a kind of show thats just a tad bit
superficial. I gotta hand it to Akira Toriyama and Kishimoto though. In Dragonball Z and

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Naruto, at least the punches and kicks connect and have impact and gravity and do real
damage.
But then again, due to their popularity, shows like Avatar and The Boondocks are subject
to a lot of network or FCC censorship. Chances are theyre not getting to do anything
near what they really would like to do with the violence level on those shows. Generally,
everything gets watered down and censored by the sponsors when violent cartoons get
made.
I look at the former Toonami Jetstream anime series, Kiba, as an example. Kiba was
originally intended to be lame and tame like traditional lame-ass card game tie in shows
like Pokemon, Bakugan, and Yu-Gi-Oh, which all have been shamelessly censored. Kiba
inspired a lawsuit between the card company funding most of Kibas budget, and the
anime studio (Aniplex) who did the creative animation and production for Kiba. In
reality, the violence in the end product (people getting slashed with lightsabers, oooh,
scary) was considered too violent for 8-13 year olds (Kibas demographic in the eyes of
the corporate producers, the card company funding Kiba). They said it was too violent
for children and back out of the payments to Aniplex, the production studio, and in turn
Aniplex sued the card company that refused to pay for the shows budget, and won the
lawsuit they filed against Top Shelf or whoever it was Aniplex sued. They were awarded
$3 million in damages. And thats just ONE example where having a lot of violence in
an animated series, anime or American, ended up causing its production staff to go broke.
Invader Zim is another example of a show that was heavily censored for being too
violent and other crimes against humanity in the eyes of sponsors.
Still, its better to fight against censorship and sponsors for violence (Kiba), or violence
and language (Boondocks) instead of sexual and pornographic internet like content (i.e.
Family Guy, Howard Stern). Sex is primarily tasteless. At least violence has aesthetics.
Technically, yes, I am an award recipient. Bang Zoom Entertainment honored me with an
award certificate for my work on AnimeTV. Thats my first, perhaps only award that Ive
won for my contributions to anime. I won the award more for participation than
achievement. But still. Working on a TV show and getting an Anime Mastery award
certificate for my contributions is actually really cool.
And honestly, I do like stuff that wins awards as a measure of its excellence, depth,
quality, and innovation.
Fantasy World Building on New-Earth: The Fallen and the Yazurai
Unlike most, if not all high fantasy, my world building encompasses not only a fantasy
world paramilitary organization, military, justice system, and government. It also
includes a criminal underworld, and world of organized crime taking place behind the
scenes, as well as corrupt elements of allegedly legitimate authorities and authority
figures. This element is very much inspired by Tom Clancy, Tarantino crime films, The
Godfather, and The Sopranos.

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Going to write some short storiesin the form of outlines developed into scripts. I can
make money if I can just turn those scripts into screenwriting discipline. And I will, just
as long as I give myself time to develop this discipline and skill.

Going to develop the outlines. I think Ill start by adding details to the descriptions. And
describing things more densely. I might buy a book or two on writing description before I
do this, but those outlines will be developed.
Im actually doing the work. And my work is finally starting to fit into a professional
form and format.
In the last 5-10 years, Ive created:

An Animated Series [Script(s)]

A Novel [Manuscript]
A Comic Book Series [Sequential Art Manuscript]

So I have: Animation Work, Literary Work, and Comics Work. Ive done spec work in
all three genres. Im finally producing the kind of formatted work Ive always talked
about for a long time now. (Script, Narrative Manuscript, and Seqential Art)

One of my biggest detractors, Achilles Heels, and adversaries against success was
improper formatting. Not drawing or writing in the proper format. That was the hard,
debilitating part. Now that my focus and analysis of my methods and techniques has
increased, Im finally ready to tackle the big, finished, and properly formatted products.
The properly formatted projects.
If you had something to show, Id rant and rave about it. But you got nothing to show
Former Teacher, Phil.
Well, Phil. Now I have something to show. I have large amounts of properly formatted
work. Now I just imitate and multiply this initial properly formatted work.

Strongest Areas of My Creative Work:

Fiction Narration (Manuscript Page)
Screenwriting (Script)
Comics Page (Sequential Art)

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Now that I know what my strongest areas of working on projects are, I need to increase
my execution, performance, and manifestation, and decrease my discussion, analysis, and
theory of the same thing.
Everywhere I go, in everything in my house that I use, I see reminders of myself and my
own influence: My floor, my bookshelf, my book and comics collection, my computers
hard drive, on the TV, in my DVD collection, in Microsoft Word, on the internet.
Everywhere. Almost everything. I cant escape myself. By now its impossible. Ive left
parts of myself everywhere. Its quite ubiquitous.
By now, Ive written down and drawn nearly every creative thought Ive ever had. Just
about every thought Ive ever had is now on paper or on a computer screen somewhere.

Things like work ad recreational work like writing novels or animation, and drawing
comics, take the largest amount of work for me, and cause the most discomfort.
Theyre the hardest to do in the evening and late at night (work within your limits). This
is because those activities take the most amount of power, energy, focus, and discipline,
and concentration.
Things that are the easiest to do (MP3s, internet, web surfing, TV watching, reading,
journal, sketching) take the least amount of work, and are thing I do all day and often all
night as well.
Im an animation screenwriter, a comic book artist, and a novelist. That never gets old,
boring, repetitive, or dull no matter how many times you hear it. It sounds new to me
every time when I call myself that: Those things: A screenwriter, a novelist, and an artist.

Quantifying Animation, Comics, and Novel output:

Script: 22 Pages Written
Narrative Fiction 24 Pages Written
Sequential At: 200+ pages Drawn
Id like toyeah right. No I wouldnt. Id be distraught to say Im more disappointed in
myself as a novelist, screenwriter, and comics artist. But Im not. Im not insecure at all.
Ive done so much work in those three crucial areas, I have nothing to be insecure about.
And Im not procrastinating in those three areas like I used to. I dont have lethargy,
fatigue, depression, lack of motivation/inspiration, anxiety, fear of rejection, lacking
energy, or anything else that could stop me from getting profitable work done in those
three genres, and areas of production

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Ill admit, the artwork on DeviantART is decent at times, but it lacks diversity, and
theres no real display of storytelling muscle. All those girls ever do is try to steal one
anothers styles, think of macabre and twisted titles for their twisted artworks, and
destroy their own childhoods. Fun. And the site should really be titled Manga
illustrators and nothing more. Not very diverse. Its all the same 10-20 portfolio pieces,
over, and over again. Give me YouTube and Twitter over that crap any day. Their slogan
should be mentally ill art from mentally ill children. Eh, take it or leave it.
Next Step for my 10-12 new scenes:
1.
2.
3.
4.
5.
6.
7.

Take the Fictional Scene Outlines Ive written

Develop them by hand and within the document
Add more written and visual details to them,
Fill in the details
Write the Fiction and/or Script
Write them out until Im satisfied
Refer to Scene Writing Book from Writers Digest

Akira and Ghost in the Shell, though they were beautiful films and brilliant comic books,
never really had endings. They just sort of drifted off into space. X: The Movie,
Escaflowne, and Cowboy Bebop, on the other hand, had serious conclusions, if I
remember correctly. A Good Ending is Emotionally Satisfying. Too many famous comic
books and animes dont really have any actual endings or conclusions.
My Scenes are in need of: Endings, Cliffhangers, Suspense, & Middles.
Things that separate my journal writing from comic book drawing and fiction writing:
Journal:

Its a habit, not a forethought.

Its intuitive, not planned
The computer does half the work
Its done With emotions and cognitions, not in response to them
It doesnt take effort or pain (discipline)

Drawing comics and writing fiction/scripts

Its a planned forethought, not a habit

Its planned, not very intuitive
The computer doesnt do much

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Its previously been done in response to emotions and cognitions, not WITH
emotions
It previously took effort and pain (not much discipline)

Come 2012, I may never return to the internet ever again. Ive already deleted a lot of my
Googleshare. Im feeling drawn to the years 2022.
Ive forgotten what my actual real face looks like. I know of the imitations, but I dont
know why my real face actually looks like. The only one who knows what my face
actually really looks like is my mom.

Father-God told me to relax and take the rest of the night off. Dont overexert myself.
Who am I to argue with the wisdom of my Father-God.
My handwritten works seem to be immune from technologys side effects. Its a great
way to get a lot written without any real disturbances or interruptions.

Sunday, December 11, 2011,

Joy Ride, my short story, has no actual hero. I wanted to do a narrative of a real bad guy.
I didnt want the story to have a real hero, but instead, just a documentary of a rather
pathetic villain at his most villainous. I think I succeeded. I got that hero-less technique
from one too many bad, irritating Hollywood TV shows Ive watched in the last 10 years.
Even though theyre satire, the so-called hero is a real reprehensible, annoying, evil,
and unlikable douchebag Who is going to kill himself in 5 years. (See Family Guy and
American Dad). So I channeled that emotion into the more raw aspect of my own story.
Its too grim to be a comedy of any sort, so it ended up sort of having some supernatural
aspects to it. I dont know if its actually shocking and disgusting, but its definitely a
little warped, just like what I saw happening around me in the last 11 years or so. The
protagonist snorts cocaine, almost runs over a toddler and her mother with his truck, says
something racist, intentionally annoys other drivers on the road, commits vehicular
homicide at least 10 times over, killing himself in the end, only to reincarnate into a
police officers body and go on a second, even more violent and malicious rampage
driven by undead vengeance over the fact that no one was moved by his own death,
that no one cares about him. Yup, hes a bad guy. There really isnt any actual debate
there about What the main character is, but what motivates him to commit such atrocities
from a Logical standpoint, other than him being a drug-addled bloodthirsty suicidal
sociopathic monster isnt really made clear.

My stories kick ass! They actually have a lot of visceral conflict now. At one point I was
writing stories with not enough conflict set against an epic speculative fiction backdrop,
with not a lot of direct conflict happening, other than the events leading out of and into
my story-arcs. The more conflict each of my scenes has, the more compelling the fiction

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is. I felt like something really clicked with Joy Ride. Of course, using the most conflicted
character I ever knew for inspiration didnt hurt either.

What do you know about World War II?

I know it started with Japanese War Planes bombing Pearl Harbor as a declaration
of War.
The Nazis in Germany Joined Forces with Japan in what was essentially an
attempt to take over the world.
Not that long after the beginning of World War II, Britain and the United States
founded the Allied Forces
Targets were bombed.
While the two sides duked it out, somewhere along the line, Hitler rose to power
in Germany and gained a rather evil national German and Eurasian Following of
entire Nations in Europe, and Hitler villainized and stigmatized relationships
between German Nazis and Jews. Then at some point one of the darkest events in
history, The Holocaust Happened.
As all this is happening, Albert Einstein fled Germany, became a U.S. citizen and
joined the Allied Forces with Winston Churchill, Patton, and others, developing
the Manhattan Project in a race against Germany to develop the first Nuclear
Weapons.
Japan was bombed numerous times with atomic warheads, and this was an
essential turning point in the war, at which point not long afterward, after D-Day,
the Nazis pretty much gave up trying to win World War II against the American
and British Allied Forces.
Hitler kills himself. The leading Nazi Party Members were tried for the
Holocaust, Hate and War Crimes before a United Nations Tribunal, and were
promptly executed
American Forces occupy Germany, Japan, France, and all the rest, and pretty
much set the record straight, leading into the post-WWII era.

I have a private investigator listed on my list of cell phone speed dial contact numbers in
my little cell phone directory. Theres a couple things Id love to give him an assignment
to look into, like the photos of myself I supposedly dont know about. I could easily
email him some data I collect and have him trace said photos to their source website.
Problem solved. Actually, technically I could do that all myself if I really wanted to. I
really got to download some internet image source file identifying software for some of
the weirder photos I see uploaded by random people online. Photos can be traced just as
IP addresses and quotes can. I guess I just never thought to pursue such a goal until right
now. Better to identify the source of the disruption than to let it continue. So just sick my
investigator friend on him/her.

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Unless you have a lot of money and connections to have complete and utter control and
power over some form of propaganda machinewhich is biased and questionably
manipulative anywayyou cant really control how other people perceive you.
Im an enormous poster-boy for the Mysticism of Perception. But Im also a promoter of
the Mysticism of Transcendental Consciousness and the Mystical Energies, or Chi of
the Universe. This yearning for something more peaceful and deeper is constantly
criticized, questioned, undermined, and scrutinized by almost everyone near me. Not so
much with people on the other side of the planet though, such as the Middle East (See the
Arab Middle Eastern Contemporary Revolution known as The Arab Spring).
Relatively New Phenomena That Have

Solar-Thermal Power and Electricity

The Arab Spring
Climate Change
Killing Bin Laden
Borders Closing
Tokyopop Shutting Down
YouTube
The Twitterverse
Social Media Marketing
Barack Hussein Obama
Health Care Reform
The Web 2.0

So I was checking a site, Klout, that measure online influence in social media.
Ultimately, I scored a 17 out of 100 and heavily influence Faith Erin Hicks and Roku on
Twitter, among a handful of others. It also said Im influential in the anime and video
worlds.
So yeah. Klout. Pretty cool. Barack Obamas score on Klout is 70, if were talking
comparative.

Damn. Am I EVER gonna have sex. Or am I going to be flying solo my whole life. I like
sex, but Ive never had sex, so the concept is still really alien to me. And hell no Im not
saving myself for marriage. Ill sleep with the first woman who says yes. So far, thats
a total of 0 women. And none have approached or seduced me in the matter so its not
like a gender role reversal scenario like it is for some guys.
When I was 13, I dreamt about moving out on my own, and being overpaid with royalty
checks, overcomfortable, well-fed, overprotected, sheltered, spoiled, pampered, waited
on hand and foot by servants or a butler. I would just endlessly dream about comfortably

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lying in bed all day and doing nothing and being comfortable doing it, in a big mansion in
a gated community in either Miami or Winter Park all day and night. That day wont
come, probably, and if it does its not going to be anytime soon. Seth MacFarlane has
enough money to live that way, and yet he never seems to. He does Family Guy and
tweets. Totally ruined the fantasy image of wealth I had teasing my imagination.

Nowadays, young girls mostly draw, and male adults mostly write. Art is for girls and
gays, and writing is for me. Women are illiterate and dyslexic, not very well educated
most of the time, rarely otherwise.
I think moving into an old folks apartment in Kissimmee or Winter Park wouldnt be
such a bad new place to live if I save up with my government checks. Anything to get the
hell away from this house. The idea of living with senior citizens on Disability Rights
doesnt seem so bad, because I really, REALLY hate people who are 25 years or
younger. So disrespectful and arrogant the kids around Casselberry are. Fuck them. Im
moving out: Eventually.

Yes, Im definitely going to be living in an apartment of some sort eventually. Im

putting aside money from my government check to pay for it. I need some independence
and freedom. I know that much.

About Jenny James.

When I designed her character, I wanted to make here this kind of deep, intelligent,
tough, sensitive, strong, and temperamental fiery, yet youthful-beautiful crimson redhead.
A combination of European and Jersey-South-Floridian ancestry: Master of numerous
forms of ballistics and martial arts, yet this delicate, gentle angel in human guise. A new
definition of the word beauty and neo-feminist girl power. Shes a mixture of Tank
Girl, undground punk-alternative neo-90s liberal, and secular analytical intelligence, yet
Beautiful like an Irish-Scottish singer of the Celtic (my mom), Shirley Manson (my old
romantic friend Nicole Cook) variety. I wanted her physical design to be a mixture of a
Bruce Timm woman, Tank Girl, that one girl archetype from the Enki Bilal book and
modern French sci-fi comics, anime heroines Motoko Kusanagi and Faye Valentine, and
Bleu from Chynna Clugston-Majors Blue Monday. Tough as nails, yet delicate as a
flower. My kind of woman.
Forming a habit of screenwriting and fiction writing takes 66 days and something called a
start signal according to a health article I read in the Orlando Sentinel.
So in my case, I can say, everytime I see someone do a bad or slanderous imitation of
me on daytime television early in the day, I can use that as my start signal, and use
that as the trigger mechanism that signifies and reminds me to get to work for 10-30

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minutes a day every weekday early afternoon spent screen writing and writing fiction.
Very Rote.

Wednesday, December 14, 2011,

Im considering going hang-gliding at some point in the future. Flight is so awesome. But
I need a hilly area outdoors to jump off of. Well, that and a hang glider and probably
lessons.

The Kiba and Valerian curse. Beautiful shows, but difficult to sit down and watch all the
episodes of. For starters, theres like at least 30 to 40 eps for each show. Another problem
is whenever I try to sit down and watch an episode, suddenly the world begins acting up
to distract me, as if God himself is intentionally trying to keep me from watching those
shows. And then theres the whole French stigma and Kiba lawsuit thing, making the
shows even more weighted in bad mojo. And as soon as I started watching a live episode
of Valerian like I had been planning to all month, my Roku player froze up during the
OP! Ridiculous! Why does the universe not want me to watch such good fantasy and
science fiction shows!?
Employee support is sacred. The best thing you can do is keep your employee records
and identities sealed, to keep all involved happy. Its kind of like schools, and student
records. I want my employees to be and stay happy, therefore their nationality and
ethnicity is to remain a secret, especially if theyre international, if they are of the Euro or
Asian descent. Im protective of my employees. I care about the people who work with
me and for me. Nationality isnt half as important as skill. For instance, Im pretty sure
there are quite a few Japanese artists working in France. Otomos visited France before.
Honestly, theres probably Japanese artists working in just about every anime inspired or
styled field: Including American webcomics, French webcomics, Franime, Chinese
animation and comics, American animation, American superhero comics, American indie
comics, Korean animation and comics, and French and American fine art. We just never
hear about them because theyre good at keeping their heritage, race, and/or nationality a
secret. Secrecy probably should be used as a form of protection for employee privacy, so
employees will feel safe and secure, and not like strangers are attempting to exploit them:
AKA comedy and marketing. If you have Asian employees, the wisest thing to do is
probably not to ever mention it unless you absolutely have to.

Areas of Design, Drafting, and Life Being Studied

Illustrated Tricking and B-Boying (Samurai Champloo)

Cloudscape Painting
Photoshop Elements (Compositing Panels)
Aerial Landscape Painting, Illustrating

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Graphic Design (Book Covers)

Typography (Not Typology), The Art of Lettering and Logo Design
Book Cover Design)
Gun Cata (Gun Choreography)
Punching Faster
Tai Chi
Firearms and Ballistics (Screenwriting, Fiction Writing)
Short Stories
Scene Planning
Scene Launches
Outlines (Screenwriting
Manga Studio EX
Patience
Start Signals (Habit Trigger Neurobiology Mechanism)

Im beginning to think my ideas, concepts, and series are a little too deep and complex
for the dumbed down, simple, one dimensional, and overtly censored world of television,
even television animation. Shows like mine are hard to do. Its not impossible, but its an
uphill battle. At least in the beginning. Even with 5 or so big thick self published books, a
credit on an actual pre-existing TV show, my own online channel, and an audience of a
quarter-to-half of a million people, apparently, Parallax is still a tough sell. Im more
successful than ever before, but even with all my accomplishments, selling to the TV
market is as difficult for me as any other industry newbie.
Favorite Writer Influences of the Moment:
Quentin Tarantino (Reservoir Dogs, Kill Bill, Pulp Fiction, True Romance)
Mario Puzo (The Godfather)
John Woo (Face Off, Hard Boiled, Last Hurrah for Chivalry, A Better Tomorrow)
Dave Willis (Squidbillies, Aqua Teen Hunger Force, Aqua Unit Patrol Squad 1)
Paul Dini (The New Batman Adventures)
Dino Stamatopolis (Moral Orel), Hamid and Various (The Adult Swim Cards)
Seth Green (Robot Chicken)
Aaron McGruder (The Boondocks)
George Lucas (Star Wars)
James Cameron (Terminator Franchise, Avatar)
Brad Neely (China Il.)
Brendon Small (Home Movies, Metalocalypse)
Yoshiyuki Tomini and Chiaki J Konaka (Gundam / Big O)
My New TV Movie Hosting Show:
Movies for Guys Who Like Guns

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I couldnt sneak a plastic pellet gun through customs over in London. And last week I
seen this Schwarzenegger movie where hes shootin all sorts of these motherfuckas with
ah Uzi.
Eminem
Who Knew?
The Marshall Mathers LP
I got to make a list from moviebodycount.com, or a weapons movies site. I want to make
a viewing list of the most gun heavy movies.

Despite all the criticism, my number 1 rated YouTube video is attracting a larger
audience than the bestselling graphic novels in the country. Cha-ching! Course I dont get
paid as suchlike and as usual.
Heres how the Statistics break down:
Scott Pilgrim Book one sold 90,664 copies
The #1 selling comic book of 2010 was Dork Diaries, @168,330 copies sold
My uploaded video:
The Jamie Hewlett music video for Gorillaz Clint Eastwood was viewed 244,909 times!
Thats almost a 90,000 audience member difference. I dont know what that means, for
me the comics creators, or anyone else exactlyno one bothered or made the effort to
tell mebut Im sure someone knows and is aware of this.
Not bad for a little upstart nobody who nobodies heard of and isnt powerful or famous.
Also:
Them: Numbers are smaller, but they actually get paid.
i: My figures are bigger, but I dont get paid anything.
For now, I guess thats kind of how the internet words. Despite my power and influence,
I tried to do much to combat this new profit degradation system and reverse logic. In the
end, Im still broke, but I have the superior audience numbers, despite massive protests
on the part of media with companies like Warner, Disney, and Viacom. Not exactly my
friends, and they sure as hell didnt help me reach this level. If anything, they scoffed at
me all the way to the top. Numbers still dont lie though. Not being cocky, just logical.
Okay, so I actually am kind of a big shot superstar now. If numbers are any indicator.
Thats up for debate. What isnt up for debate is that Im going to have to learn how to
take the next step into success. Im already very successful and influential by some

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standards, and more people know it now than ever before. And I dont have privacy and I
dont have secrets. Not anymore. I can live with that because I dont really control that
element. But I can control my behavior and actions from this point on, for better or
worse. I dont really feel the need to brag, other then when Im drafting my biography.
Being successful and bragging about it publicly can create a very Ben-10-like effect. It
can really rub certain other people the wrong way. You dont want that. Trust me on that
one. Envy does not suit complete strangers.
Applause. I cant get enough applause. Fortunately I, or should I say, my identity gets
lots of applause, on talk shows, concerts, and conventions. Im a more popular guy than I
thought

Parallax by JM is the side project that pays nothing which I put 90% of my
energy, effort, and schedule into. It will pay me a lot of money one day. Its an
unrealized asset.

SplitAtomBoom is a full time producing, broadcasting, and filmmaking job,

thats rewarding, and has an audience, but not a payroll. I put 10% of my schedule
into that. Its an unacknowledged liability.

No. 1 Rankers
(Media, Video, Anime) YouTube
(Comic Books, Novels, DVD, TV shows) Amazon, Amazon on Demand
(Distributing TV Shows) Netflix, Roku
(Distributing TV Shows) AS Saturdays/ CN Action Fridays
(Buying DVDs in person) Best Buy, Books A Million
I do subscribe to Netflix an Animation Magazine, but Im Going to subscribe to some
other, more famous magazines in 2012: Forbes, Entertainment Weekly, and TIME. I
think Im going to go back to being more media conscious. Forbes is for technology and
big business, Entertainment Weekly is for Entertainment Media, and TIME is for current
events, politics, and pop culture.

There is my newest story concept: In Realm of the Heavens

Realm of the Heavens is an awesomely innovative story and book-cinema concept. Ive
performed the miracle of creation and manifestation yet again. As Parallaxs primary
colors were black, red, and blue, the primary hue and color of Realm of the Heavens, is
blue. The sky on a cloudy, non rainy day is the perfect symbol of this type of Last Exilestyle production design. Airships, cities and architecture floating in the clouds. Very
anime-like. Just reaching for that impossible harmonious rainbow of visual splendor.

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Except Im not doing martial arts and weapons in a Dying Earth saga. Im ascending to
the Heavens, staying airborne and never coming back down to earth.
In the Realm of the Heavens is distinctive from my other portfolio of visual and literary
work in that it just simply could not be done as a cartoon show or comic book. I has to be
done as a quadrilogy of novels and/or big-budget CGI-aided Hollywood movies. Its
impossible to put that level of realism, detail, and complexity into comics or animation.
There are temporal elements that would make rending the world impossible, unless it was
simplified and abstracted in the production design somehow, even if it was an anime.

Anime is anime. Comics are comics. Ive actually gotten quite good at drawing and
sketching in the style of comics and anime. My style goes beyond the surface, to the level
of representing the soul, style, and pacing of comics and anime in general. Even my
therapist, who doesnt believe she can draw, has started to draw like an anime artist, by
emulating my style. She had left a random drawing from a patient out at her interview
table at the beginning of one of my recent sessions with her. I found it impressive in its
simple-ish depiction of realistic and clothed human anatomy. That looks like an anime
drawing! For someone who doesnt really draw, its amazingly anime-like I said. Who
drew it? I asked. I did, Mrs. Jo Anne Cook said. Nice! I exclaimed. I got it from
you said Mrs. Jo Anne, I draw more like you now.
The soundtrack to Manifesto is an epic domestic screaming match between Andrew
Alberts and Cary and Peggy Alberts. Im not much of a screamer. Andrew doesnt
mellow with age. Hes still as arrogant, violent, and Tourrettes-possessed as ever. Just
like Cary is a blood vessel popping hernia in the making.
Past Lives. Sites I frequent and the pseudonyms and nom de plums I use:

Spookyland: Noomoo, Noom

Oni Press Forums: ugly1, The Ugly One, The Ugly One (JOE)
Adult Swim: Bebopbip, Spindack, [various]
DeviantART: Fugazinator, Omnitron, Synchronous Hellion
Tokyopop: Spindack
Blogger: Bebopbip In the Void, J.M., TAK
Google: Spindack, J.M. Strebler, SplitAtomBoom
Webcomics Nation: J.M., J.M. Strebler
YouTube: Spindack, Dopenose555, SplitAtomBoom
Twitter: BlackSwanDragon, ManjiBlade

Thats 23 different pseudonyms.

The hardest working anonymous person in internet showbusiness: Me.
In high school, one of my teachers had me take a future prediction drawing test, or
some such thing. Essentially the test predicted I would have a ton of power and status. It

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also predicted I would have just as much money, but that prediction element hasnt come
true. Yet.
Talent in production design and choreography in martial arts, in Asian in America. How
many people can draw fighting and guns and production design and storyboards in
general, in terms of animation population of staffs in Asia, France, and American: What
you see is what you get, in terms of how many people can draw in that way. The main
reason we dont see anime in America as much, is not something America is doing by
choice. We dont see more American anime because Americans DONT KNOW HOW
and ARENT ABLE TO, make anime. What you see a country do with animation is a
reflection of what it is actually able to do. Theres no big conspiracy. If America isnt
making anime, its because it A) Isnt able to because no one or not enough people can
draw that way, and B) Because no one in America knows how, with rare exceptions.
You know, Im half as powerful as Jhonen Vasquez, and just as powerful as Bryan Lee
OMalley obviously. And yet I have no Wiki page (predictably enough), and Ive never
gotten a multimedia franchise deal from a major Hollywood studio either. In terms of raw
power, I have just as much, if not a lot more powerthan either of those guys. Though I
am just as powerful and my status is just as pungent: Things they have that a person of
the same power level doesnt: Fanmail, Real celebrity, you name all over the credits, a
TV Show, a Wikipedia page, a couple million dollars, fanmail, fan email, popularity, not
being insulted on TV and in media every 5 minutes, not having to deal with 1/10 the
amount of abuse from neighbors and the public, an army of online groupies and fans,
sexiness. I dont have a single one of those things, and yet Im obviously just as big as
them, if not bigger. Now that I think about it, what do they got that I dont got? More
love and recognition in spades, and a sheltered, pampered life. Not more skill, creativity,
fame, vision, influence, or power. Thats for certain. More money I guess.

The blank page of paper on my desk and bed. It brings me such power!

Finally got some sleep. Finally was able to rest. Before that it was a bit on the chaotic
side. I wish my life wasnt so emotional and chaotic.

So, how much again does being my incredible power and status level pay in terms of
salary? Nothing. You make billions worldwide happy and make peoples lives easier
everywhere with online video, and yet the only thing others pay you financially is
welfare checks from social security (not even because of youre actual accomplishments,
because no ones WILLING to pay you money for making millions billions happy on the
internet and making corporations billions of dollars? Merry freaking Christmas world. I
suppose theres bigger financial injustices out there. OK, yeah, I got ripped off in the
beginning. I realize that. Everyone knows who I am yet Im not paid for it. I get it.
Moving on.

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Chapter 50
(Windows XP)

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Monday, December 19, 2011

Shout out to my girl stonergoth187. I love that girl. Shes so beautiful and shes got mad
drawing and conversational skills. She has just as much Adult Swim credibility as I do, if
not more. Glad I made a new friend in the last two days. Finally Im meeting girls on the
internet. Thanks stonergoth187.

Only 5 days left till Christmas.

Things that give you J-Cred.

Learning Japanese
Knowing Japanese
Speaking Japanese
Kanji
Photoshop
Webcomics and manga
Knowing obscure anime titles
Knowing obscure manga titles
Drawings real anime
Visiting or living in Japan / Tokyo
Flying to Japan
Interacting with Japanese people
Working in anime
Working in animation and manga
Being an anime fan (otaku)
Not dissing subtitles

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Tuesday, December 20, 2011,

[Subtitle: I understand a little bit of Japanese now!]

I uploaded my Pimsleur Basic Japanese audio CDs to my mp3 player, and I
bookmarked Google Translate and Mymemory.translated.net. Google Translate even
has a pronunciation and dictionary features to help you learn the meaning of each word
and sentence/paragraph.
This newfound knowledge and database will be useful if I ever travel to Asia.
The best way I can think to describe it is its like learning English all over again.
Ive started trying Google Music. Ill have to see how it works. Seems like fun. Im
uploading songs as I write this.
Psychic headaches. Psychic tiredness. The psychic brain and power and celebrity. All
new topics to me.
4 days left till Christmas! I love watching TV around Christmas. So much good stuff to
watch finally. Its the end of the year blowout.
Cant wait to see what I get for Christmas on Christmas Morning. Probably a lot of
books and whatnot.

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Wednesday, December 21, 2011,

Its basically Thursday already, its around midnight. Its around 3 days left till
Christmas. I have good childhood memories of Christmas that were never ruined or
sullied. Therefore I like to keep up the tradition of making Christmas fun.

Thursday, December 22, 2011

Well, my ankle finally became un-sprained, so now I can continue exercising and
stretching my legs again, now that the muscles in my ankle have healed up. Took
anywhere from a week and a half to 2 weeks to recover from the intensive exercise
And going a night without sleep or medication really fucked up my mind and spirit,
and psychic consciousness. It was pretty trippy. Fortunately, I got some sleep the
following day and night, but also took a tiny bit of my sedentary medication during the
day to help me recover from my temporary manic phase.
Im recovered from:

The psychic social-power internet migraine

Martial Arts Sprain
Weight gain
Christmas Blues
ASMB internet phobia (Danielle)

Ive found one surefire method of getting me to sleep is to read or re-read a really
boring chapter in a really boring book.

According to some astrology report, Ive spent many a life time, or many previous
lifetimes wandering the earth as a philosopher, mystic, academic, and transient.

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Im unfocused in this lifetime from spending all my previous lifetimes wandering and
roaming on spiritual and philosophical quests.
Im a Quest-Seeker. Im always Seeking, a Seeker, and always on a Quest.
Ah yes, The Quest.

With every Hero on a Quest, there must be something worth Questing for.
What does Mono seek on his quest?
What does Arned seek on his quest?
What do I seek on My Quest?

Friday, December 23, 2011,

Poor Time Warner. Theyre big, famous, and powerful, and yet they are quite out of
the loop.
Manifesto: The Website launched today. I launched it through Google Sites and
Google Documents. With some positive encouragement from stonergoth187, I was
well on my way from minute 1.
And on the eve of Christmas Eve. Interesting.
So far all the chapters of Manifesto up till this point are past their first drafts. All 180+
of them. But Ive only just in the last few months started editing the first book. I have
the printed version edited, but I need to revise the digital chapter documents before I
upload them to the server. Im currently on Chapter 3, which is awaiting editing.
I still like anime, and manga, but now that big business has gotten a hold of it, 2
predictable things have and will happen:
1. Big Multibillion dollar corporations will parasitically drain the soul AND spirit
of the manga and anime industry over time, and therefore Tokyo, Japan as well

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2. The resulting fallout from this love hate impact were already seeing, will
probably, and probably already has started to cannibalize the American and
Japanese otaku, anime base, draining even more morale from the anime art
form and industry in Japan.
3. The result, the possible extinction of broadcast anime, due to it being too
valuable and sacred of a commodity in its own right.
Ive watched The Corporation. I know whats happening. The same thing thats
happening to anime at the beginning of the new millennium happened to grunge in the
90s with Viacom and MTV. It could result in a nightmarish scenario for true anime
fans.
You see, the more legit anime broadcasters of network and broadcasting and anime
history, have made an enormous profit and gain and boost in morale from anime.
People like me are fueling their industry. But theythey being anyone who isnt the
internet or myselfhave a tendency to undercompensate their audience. To them, they
subscribe to the classic big business motto less is more. Meaning if they can still
make a profit and underdeliver in the number of hours they spend broadcasting anime
on primetime and non-primetime television, even daytime television (DBZ Kai),
theyre going to do that until the well runs dry. And oh it will. All its going to do is
build up the average consumers hungerwhether healthy or unhealthyfor piracy,
pirated content, copyright violating videos, and nonlegit anime outlets. People are
still watching just as many hours of it online and spending just as much advertising
dollars on online sites on the main venues, but sure, lets call it non legit for old
times sake. Until the piracy hunger is sated by a necessary reform on the networks part
in terms of how many broadcast hours they devote to unlucrative yet very popular
anime, the more theyre setting themselves up to go out of business in competition
with pirates. No amount of internet corporate bullying, discouragement, cease and
decist letters, or lawsuits and pressure in general from the corporate entities is going to
change that. And until they adapt their business and marketing model to meet the
current demands of the market like pioneers such as myself are trying to do, its next
stop Anime Apocalypse. The real one, not my creative project Im trying to sell.
To me, the [anime TV] supply and demand new-media integrated business structure
couldnt be more obvious. Yield to the current landscape thats not just about TV, or
die and be trampled by the mob thats demanding more anime. Theres plenty to
choose from. You cant not look at the number of animes airing on Japanese
broadcasters in Tokyo, and say theres nothing going on with that growing industry.
The Japanese animation broadcast industry, which are huge underdogs in all this.

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Saturday, December 24, 2011,

Christmas Eve. Been working very hard at doing revisions to Manifesto in print, and
updating Manifesto: The Website. Got another chapter (chapter 4) up today, on
Christmas Eve. So far there havent been all that many encroachers, which is a pleasant
surprise. Maybe its the goodwill of the season, or maybe the bottom line finally fell
out. Who knows?

You dare to tell ME, the great JM, how to write animation for television, Jeffrey
Scott!? Blasphemy!

I like epic novels, but I also like martial arts epics, and High Fantasy epics: All three.
Just epic narratives in generalNarratives and literary scripts that are long, dense,
thick, and full of ambition. Its my literary specialty. Manifesto: The Series is an epic.
Its an experimental epic, taking from many nonfiction and fiction genres. Its an epic
mind, which is what I have. Im a 22, a Master Builder: Architect of Cities & Dreams,

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so of course Im able to clearly visualize a literary work of grand and great scope, be it
nonfiction or fantasy. Clearly Im approaching a point in my life where Im going to
prove to myself I can do both.
Im here to prove that theres more to writing 2,000+ pages about than walking through
a couple mountain ranges with a sword, an elaborate Hong-Kong style shootout, or
elaborately choreographed martial arts sequences. Those 2,000+ pages can be about
what you had for supper, or your own personal spiritual and existential philosophy
about society, mankind, and the animation-comics industry. That is what I achieved
after all.
Who are you? And how do I fight you? Tell me how to punch you.
Hail my Dark Lord and Master, Satan. Thank you for a great Christmas, Satan!
Ben 10 ispretty damn. Annoying. Same with Danny Phantom. They are essentially
the exact same show, both of which rip off my thing. Lame!
Ode To The Glock
The glock is a heavy handgun. With nice weighty bullets that explode shrapnel on
impact. An underrated gun. It can do some decent damage if used properly/improperly,
in my opinion. If you like pulling triggers and shooting things, and not cocking the gun
like you do with a shotgun, the glock is actually pretty efficient. Just because a
handgun is small or the size of your hand doesnt mean its not heavy.
If theres one thing I love as much as Christmas, its guns. Im a bit guns-shy in terms
of actually firing the rounds in the chamber, but that doesnt mean I cant appreciate
the ballistic aesthetics.
Career Milestones (Things I might never Achieve):

Wikipedia Articles
TV Show contract
Book and Comics contract
Art Book
Press Release / Press Articles
Being hired
Royalty check

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Profile
Name: JM Matthews
Age: 28
Height: 6 Feet 00 inches
Eye Color: Brown
Hair Color: Black
Skin Color: Light Copper
Ethnicity: Multiracial
Relationship Status: Single, Never Married
Religion: Buddhist, Taoist, Agnostic/Mystic
I.Q. level: 130
Type: Rational, INTP/INFP
Numerology Destiny Number: 4/22
Astrological Sign: Scorpio on Sagittarius Cusp
Weight: 337 lbs.
Nationality: American
Job Title: Entrepreneur
Illness: Manic Depressive, Schizophrenic, Astigmatism
Criminal Record: None
Felonies Committed: None
Birth City: Ann Arbor, Ypsilanti County
Birth State: Michigan
Current Residence: Queen Elaine Dr.
Current City and State: Casselberry, FL.

Tuesday, December 27, 2011,

Damn. Drawing comics and martial arts poses is a lot of work. Drawing martial arts
comics is really exhausting!
Drawing something over and over again wont necessarily make you better at drawing
your subject each time. Myth.
Also, the best drawings are based on other visual images. The best drawings I produce
use reference material. Good drawings are copies of other good visual images.
How to Draw Comics Fighting:
IF anyone could teach this subject, it would be the Clone Wars crew.
Until theres a late night programming block with partners like Dentsu USA, JM
Animation, and/or Titmouse, and Cartoon Network or other such companies,
producing late night blocks of mature audience Original Action Anime Programming
Block with shows like Big O II, IGPX, and Star Wars, GI Joe: Resolute, Parallax will

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probably not see airtime. Until theres more Todd McFarlanes and Jared Wolfsons out
there, who make shows with action and maturity, theres just no hope for creators like
me ever having their projects see the light of screentime day or night. Patience my
student. The opportunity will arrive. But you wont see it coming. Thats kind of how
they roll in the animation industry.
In the meantime Ill keep plugging away and producing new preproduction work until
my opportunity arrives. I probably dont know as much about making TV shows as I
think I do.

The secret to Success in fighting comics:

Dedication, absolute dedication, is what keeps one ahead-a sort of indomitable obsessive
dedication and the realization that there is no end or limit to this because life is simply an
ever-growing process, an ever-renewing process.
Ever since I was a child I have had this instinctive urge for expansion and growth. To me,
the function of and duty of a quality human is the sincere and honest development of
ones potential.
I have come to discover through earnest personal experience and dedicated learning that
ultimately the greatest help is self-help-doing ones best, dedicating ones self
wholeheartedly to a given task, which happens to have no end but is an on-going
process.
Bruce Lee: On working toward success

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Like Bruce Lee says, theres no limit to the amount of dedication you can put into your
craft. That includes art and writing. Theres no limit to how much energy and work one
can put into his craft. The potential for hard work and productivity is limitless. The
amount of work an artist or author can put into his craft and projects and workis
limitless.
Things I kind of embrace in my personal humor:

Misogyny
Homophobia
Machismo
Boys Club (No Bitches Allowed)
Racism
Wackiness
Crazy Energy
Irreverence
Violence
Aggression
Making fun of really stupid shit
Perceptiveness

These are words to live buy.

Reference material (a list)

Photographs of poses and postures

YouTube videos (pause)
DVDs of Action Movies (pause)
DVDs of Anime Series (pause)
Comics n Manga

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Google Images

What good is staying up till the dawn of next morning if I have nothing to write about
and no energy to draw?
I still want a name change. Joe is a name nobody really wants to have for the most part.
Keeping On Task:
Things Ive been working on Daily, and Will Continue to Work on Daily:

Scriptwriting (Scripts: TV, Comics)

Comic Book Pages (Sequential Art: Fight Scenes / Dialogue / Art Direction)
General Speculative Fiction Writing Regular Pages (Novel Manuscript)
Scene-Beat Outline Chart Pages
Storyboard Practice
Production Design & Perspective Practice
Character & Costume Design Practice
Acrylic Painting in Canvas Sketchbook, Led pencil sketching in books

Pages I finished over Christmas Break:

2 script pages (glock scene)

1 page of sequential art (fighting page)
2 pages of novel manuscript (Joy Ride)

Not a bad haul for November and December.

Wednesday, December 28, 2011,

A convicted felon got access to my legal name once and really tried to ruin me with my
own name. Bryan Johnston of course. Hes the felon. Killed a man and everything, after
tarnishing my reputation by manipulating the media and stealing my name to use for
criminal activity. That is why Im getting a name change.
New name: James Alberts. Or, James Matthew Alberts. J.A., J.M., J.M.A.
Other versions of my new name: Jack, Jacob, Jake, Jamie, Jim, Jimmy

Jim Matthew Alberts

Jacob Matthew Alberts

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James Matthew Alberts

Joe is dead to me. And everyone else, it seems.

Therefore I have no choice but to change my name.
Things girls in the U.S. dont do and fail miserably at: Fight, practice science, write,
choreograph fighting on screen, martial arts, serve on the military front line, fire guns, be
president, be me, become death metal and metal mainstream musicians, write and draw
science fiction, executive produce Cartoon Network and Adult Swim shows.
Animation and comics are hard work. Anyone who makes it look easy and presents it that
way is probably just trying to deceive you. Animation and comics (anime and manga
included) are not easy to make. Its strenuous, nerve-wracking, high pressure, and back
breaking work and 24/7 obsession and labor. The only people who can make things like
that look easy are millionaires in print and on TV, and 12 year old frauds on the internet.
The Japanese only make it look effortless because they culturally, socially,
psychologically, and emotionally socially-conditioned to perform that way. Their
producers beat them within an inch of their lives, sweatshop style, if theyre not
overachieving 24/7. We dont have that in America. In America, we work hard, but Im
afraid we dont have sweatshops that pass for teenage bedrooms and professional
animation studios. The Japanese are brainwashed by their own society to conform to
doing everything like perfectionists. Its not human. At all really.
Anime = High Class Production Studio Sweatshop.
Im working under different conditions than the Japanese are. No wonder they make me
look stupid.
I dont have what it takes to work in an animation sweatshop in Japan.
My sphere of influence doesnt apply to the overseas market anymore. It probably never
did. I dont have a very big Southeast Asian audience. Nor do I have much of a European
audience. I have a Floridian audience, and three fourths of that crowd hates me like the
rest of the country does because they get their information from the National Higher
Ups like Viacom and Time Warner, and not local information, and other bullshit sources
like that. My national and international shadow has halted local communications. For
that, I apologize. But its not entirely my fault. I wasnt involved in any of that. They
chose not to involve me in every show and movie they produced about me, which led to
me to my current paragraph. Whatever happened to local pride and unity? Im no longer
thinking globally, or even nationally. Its a sweatshop in comparison to local work in my
own home studio-house. Im quitting those markets: National and Global. All I care
about is making myself and the people who know and like me happy. Everything else is
irrelevant. Go bother someone else. Im not taking part in this shameless lie of celebrity
anymore. The internets way too messed up and unstable to ever get rich like Mark

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Zuckerberg or however the fuck you spell his name. Or Larry Page. Who gives a damn
about Mark Zuckerberg. Its not about YOU, Mark and Larry. Hate to tell you.
Eh, I dont really give a crap about that though. Who cares? Youre in another state all
the way across the country. Who CARES who you are? Id rather rot in the obscurity
of the ghetto than mingle with assholes who already are disowned by everyone,
everywhere. I still have a foundation in my room. Why not secede (third world country)
style?
Truth is, other than the shitty assed movies Andrew watches, the medias power holds no
tangible power or influence in this. Here no one recognizes me and I can do as I please. I
kind of like the idea of seceding from the mainstream media. The mainstream and
international community (if you want to even call it that) is too competitive for my
tastes. Im just sick of it. I no longer feel the need to be an active citizen of the global
village. I just want to work on my projects, which by now are only to make myself happy,
and satisfy my own desire for action in storytelling. I have nothing to prove to the global
village anymore. Fortunately I still have somewhere to live. Having somewhere to live is
more important than any kind of glory and over-abundant prosperity.

Its natural for an inexperienced writer or artist to want to read How-To and Idiots Guide
books on how to draw or write screenplays and comics, as oppose to just doing it. Natural
is the human tendency to want to be taught how to do instead of sit down, pull up a pad
of paper, pick up pen, lay down some thumbnails, and practice and learn by doing.
In terms of art, cinema, and literature, doing and making the attempt, is more important
than learning, researching, preparing, or studying.
A well intentioned artist like me can go half their lives not knowing this, just simply
living in a bubble and being oblivious to it.
And because Im a workaholic INTP perfectionist, and because at one point I was
attempting to rival the Japanese artists in terms of work ethic, somewhere alone the
line I confused work with play, confused career with leisure, and confused job and
career with having a hobby. Unless youre getting paid to write or draw, its technically
a hobby. Thats the only thing your family will ever accept it as. Thats how it is in my
life. I havent taken a vacation of any sort since I was 8 years old. And I work 5-12
hours a day on perfecting hobbies often, without ever taking a break. Maybe thats my
adoptive fathers influence. Hes working himself to death, and so am I. In that regard,
were similar. My dad has veins covering his feet from standing on his feet as a full
time pharmacist for so many years. He never gives himself a break or easy time. Im a
relentless worker, just like my dad, Cary. Everyone in my family on both sides works
hard, pretty much. I dont think there really are any truly lazy people in my family. Not
that I can think of. Nobody takes a break. No one lets go of their intensity or energy.
No one slows down or quits. No one chills out. No one stops being uptight and

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repressed. No one in my family isnt a workaholic. Its like living with Asians or
something equally stressful like that. Everyone never stops working. They all work
really hard, regardless of their behavior and whether or not its tolerable and good or
not.
But yes, Im demoting screenwriting, design, drawing, production design, comics, and
storyboarding to hobbies. There doesnt look to be any money coming out of them for
quite some time now. Maybe even another 10 years or more. I can wait 25 years. Ive
already waited 15 years to break out. Whats another 10?
The Hobbyist: I kind of like being a hobbyist. Im not really much of a professional. If
I was a pro, I wouldnt be living here, in my parents basement, under the stairs. Im a
hard working hobbyist, and I work pretty intensely at my hobby, but at the end of the
day my title doesnt change. And it wont unless somebody pays me to work for them,
which, lets face it, because of all the negative press, will probably never happen,
politically speaking. Bad press and discrimination, both of which Im dealt with, keep
anyone from getting work, assuming their affected by it somehow. My style of work is
not compatible with the ways and politics of the market, therefore Ill be a povertystricken hobbyist with no place of his ownforever probably. But hey, at least I dont
have to live in the global village anymore.
Also, Im part martyr and altruist. Altruists and martyrs generally dont really get
royalty checks.
My end game with Parallax was primarily money, status, and security, which is
primarily why I worked so hard on it. I was trying to build my future. But now, my socalled future has shifted and evolved into the present: Right Now. Now is the future.
And the future is Now. I AM an adult. I AM successful (mostly for doing nothing).
And I DO influence millions of people with the media. So what more is there to strive
and aim for? I dont have the same end game with Parallax as I did in the beginning. In
the beginning, when I started Parallax, I was still a kid, I had no competition, my life
wasnt an open book, I still had the name Joseph, and I wanted Parallax to either be a
Dark Horse comic or an Adult Swim or Toonami TV show. Things are different now.
Not better or worse, thats hard to say, but I dont feel like the necessity to prove
myself to the public is there anymore. If the goal and purpose of the project disappears
and becomes nothing, does that mean the project itself will, too?
I have generated a considerable amount of controversy in my lifetime, primarily over
how I live my own life. Being controversial means youre always the bad guy to
somebody, and after a while you forget who youre even offending. People seem to
like ignoring my work in favor of debating the merits of my personal life.
Yeah, thats correct. I draw martial arts comics. Well, Im starting to anyway. But Im
sick of having no audience online, or worse yet, controversial critical attacks from
people I dont know, so Ive begun drawing North American martial arts comics

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primarily for myself. That and posterity. Im on a low note now, though, so its kind of
hard to focus on the task at hand. My fatigue is acting up. Drawing kinetic motion
takes a lot out of me. Its like exercising. It cramps and fatigues me. Maybe music
would help

Imcomplete aspects of my fighting:

Supporting Cast
Model Sheets
Music
MP3s
UTube Videos
DVD pauses
Sequential Art
Pre-Paneled Paper

The foundation for building a great comic book page composition isnt buried in Anger
or Rebellion. Only rarely. The best comic book pages comic book pages come from
enthusiasm, and a musical explosion and outpouring of musical energy and force,
thats found in your favorite songs, and looking at your favorite classic comic books!

Competitive thinking is not healthy for my art.

Self-hypnosis on the other hand, is. It actually works in making me more
efficient.

Im going to start my own media company as a pioneer in an all-new field. Online

media, webcomics, animation, and print comics publishing, of the Action, Fantasy,
Science Fiction, and Martial Arts Variety. Im the Founder, Executive Producer,
President, and Editor in Chief. If it doesnt cost anything to start, if my materials OK,
THEN Ill worry about going into business for myself in big media. Its an anime
studio, but its based in America. The American Southeast, like CN. But thats on the
backburner until I have a lot more product to peddle.
Maybe I should Write, Executive Produce, Storyboard, and Direct the demo reel of the
End Times Pilot. I can make the original material a comic book thats self-published.
I dont know if anyone would be interested in purchasing such a project. And so far I
havent proven myself capable of running an operation, only attracting way to much
bad press to myself, for eccentric behavior. I need to work on that. Ive got the talent,
but can I clean up my act eventually?

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Thursday, December 29, 2011,

I dont make manga. I dont draw or write manga. I write and draw comics. Comic
books. Comics with a distinctive manga and anime influence, yet still very American.
The only reason I said I was drawing manga that way was because that was how
Tokyopops Stu Levy and Co. defined my work when they got really excited about it in
the press, when Tokyopop was still around. I never actually called my work manga,
because it isnt. It really just incorporates manga elements. But its actually just plain
old experimental indie comics.

Self-Hypnosis Help in:

Watching no TV
Being less bored without TV
Finding my own entertainment
Resisting Temptation
Drawing Comics and Storyboards
Exercise
Weight Loss

While, yes, I have had a little bit of formal art education, overall probably less than a
years worth of training if its all counted together. Phil, Rima, Donna. AiFL.
From this point on, Im a self-taught artist. Im self-taught.
Well, the dictator of North Koreamost dangerous and likely to bring us into the age
of a Nuclear Apocalypseis dead. And thank goodness for that. However you say his
name. North Korea is run by a teenager now. Pretty sad. Sad North Korea is so
pathetic!
If I dont produce anything new, whether around the house or on the internet, and if I
dont DO anything new, will I still be famous and powerful? Will the machine keep
charging forward? Will I still have a job? Well I am the proxy star of numerous TV
shows by default. Thats actually pretty cool.
But seriously. Is my whole lifeis everything about merun by machines and
algorithms now. Do I actually need to do anything myself anymore. Or am I headed
towards a future where Im treated like, like complete and utter royalty, and dont have
to life a finger, and am discouraged from doing such. Why does success seem to nullify
physical activity and work ethic? If being more successful makes you not have to work
hard anymore, Im not sure if I want that. Even money I get for free, from the
government. The government and Obama administration pays me! Shocking right? Just
for sitting on my ass and doing next to nothing other than drawing and writing all day,

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I earn $650 a month, or I probably will in the next three to four days, whenever 2012
starts.
If theres one thing Ive learned from seeing the era of creator-driven television
animation come to what seems like essentially its untimely demise at all the
networksevery last one of them, unless you call Fish Hooks a real show, which I
dontits that, as a potential TV show creator, an artist needs to stick to his
principles. Noble deeds and noble intent do not always go unpunished. Sometimes the
industry will reward you for sticking with it, even long after youve given up. I just
hope I dont have to die before End Times actually gets turned into something, if it
ever does. For now, because of the limited capabilities of animation production in the
United States TV studio production system, Im sticking to my guns, and Im sticking
to comics. Even if everyone says no to my comics, Im still going to produce them.
Sometimes thats what it takes. Pure tenacity. Not giving up. But I know this much
from reading the Cartoon Brew article. In the creator-driven era, actually having sold a
show to a network is and always will be the most cherished, treasured, and rewarded
goal of just about every comics and animation artist, even ones that act stuck up and
claim otherwise, we all clearly want the same exact thing.

Friday, December 30, 2011,

Im beginning to suspect that my story structure lacks real action. It lacks conflict at
certain points. My scripts and stories arent emotionally and physically suspenseful
enough. Ive got to work on that part.
1 day left till 2012! Tomorrow is New Years Eve.
Everyone on the internet and in Los Angeles is a bunch of stuck up backstabbers. Its
unbelievable. What a bunch of fucking stuck up pricks. Yohan. What a prick.

Such boredom and disrespect. Theres no escaping it I guess. No wonder my favorite

daytime activity is firing an unloaded glock at Daytime Television shows when all the
shows I hate are on. Good target practice. Not hurting anyone really, except maybe
terrorizing the shows I hate. Oh well! Ha ha! Guns. Gotta love em. No. My hatred is
indeed pretty real. But its obviously justified. You want to test me, youll soon find
out just how much you can push meBefore I fucking kill your ass.

Kind of in a Sony mp3 walkman, and novel reading kind of mood. And yet my
attention span is becoming increasingly short. I wonder if I could start taking ADD
meds again. Maybe they could help me hyper focus. Its been forever since Ive taken a
pill for my Attention Deficit Disorder. Honestly, Id be willing to take some pills for
that, if it would help. Probably not Ritalin though.

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All right! My book arrived. The Book of Five Rings by Miyamoto Musashi. Its an
awesome weapons technique book. Its the first book ever on dual-wielding swords.
What does it mean to be Miyamoto Musashi, or Jubei-sensei? What does it mean to be
Manji or Mono? What does it mean to face life and death on a daily basis? To win or
die? In essence, Im asking, what does it mean to be a real life warrior? Whether its
Shogun or Samurai, The book of Five Rings is an excellent resource for getting into the
mind of a warrior, those who dance with death on a constant basis. As is my pocket
size Aikido book. Warriors are always meditating upon death, and are never far away
from death, or the martial arts. Its a Warriors Code thing. An honor thing. When
attacked by an opponent in a duel, you win or you lose your life. Simple as that.

Im definitely glad I dont draw manga for a living. And Im glad I dont actually have
a real audience. What in the world would I give my audience if I actually had one?
Certainly not a finished comic book.
I really have to take some medicine to improve my focus and concentration: something
for my Attention Deficit Disorder; something that will make it considerably easier to
get a lot more artwork done, instead of getting worn out after barely any sketching,
thumbnails, and drawings at all. Ill have to consult my psychiatrist at the beginning of
next year. I havent taken ADD medicine since art school, which was by now almost a
decade ago.
With my art, its Moores Law. Prepare yourself, because anything that can go wrong,
with your art, will go wrong. My art strategy is Prepare for the worst, because chances
are even worse things than the worst will happen 10 or 20 times over before you even
get a chance to breathe. This applies to both comics and animation. There is not an
easy road ahead, waiting for me. Its a difficult, painful, dangerous, hazardous,
unsupportive road.
I seem to keep running into nerds online who repeatedly attempt to humiliate me
publicly online by repeatedly attempting to commit digital breaking and entering by
telling everyone what porn sites I look at when Im horny and board. Apparently
theyd rather just tell everyone what kind of porn I watch than blackmail me or
anything. Oh well, better they tell the world Im looking at 2 girls 1 lawsuit than ask
me for money, which I dont have. Theyre not out to extort me, just nerdbully (aka
cyberbully) me by posting inappropriate images of me they stole from a computer
(mine) they hacked into with Trojan viruses and hacked webcameras. Of course none
of any of that is done with my knowledge or opinion, and next time I see someone put
an image of me online, Im doing a reverse image search on the fool to find out the
source of where its coming from.
Things really havent been the same in animation lately, ever since the older era in
animation died off. The wonderful creator-driven TV era of artists. Artists like Jhonen,
McFarlane, Mike Judge, Tim Burton, Jamie Hewlett, Bruce Timm, Peter Chung, Akira

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Toriyama, Shirow, and Otomo. Its now essentially impossible to walk the same path
they did in the 90s and early 2000s. Networks are really, REALLY unsupportive of me
and others trying to carry on that tradition, ever since it didnt end up being as
profitable. I already miss those two decades.
And if the Creator-Driven Era of TV animation is coming to an end, and the era of
print comics is also ending. What exactly does that leave us aspiring creators with.
What could the internet possibly offer that could even compete with such former glory.
Certainly nothing I could come up with. But a creator-friendly atmosphere for
traditional print comic books and traditional TV animationis dying off. God only
know where well all be in 5 to 10 years, considering whats happened. Anime and
Hollywood are off limits.
If you cant sell a show to the TV market, due to networks getting uncreative and
greedy, where DO you sell a show? I was kind of counting on my work eventually
having some kind of a venue other than just the internet. The internet is a blackhole.
Nothing ever returns from there. Let alone turns a profit. Initiative on Hollywoods part
isnt going to change that, and if it ever does I might change my mind. But I dont see
that happening anytime soon. I know Im not good with sex, my colon, and money, but
I never possibly could have known Id have been so bad at them either.
Well, if no one, not even rich and powerful people, can actually be lucky or fortunate
enough to start up a comics or TV animation operation with any kind of stability or
consistencyWhat makes me think its going to be any easier for me? It wont be.
Mwuahahahahahaahha!!!!!!
Because the market is shrinking more and more everyday, my schemes arent quite so
grand and epic like they were around 2007-2009. Not now that I know how limited
everything is, how limited the market and industry and business and art form is. Turns
out, since you cant sell a show anymore, your sketchbook goes from being a limitless
dream machine and visionary vision production factory, to being just a sketchbook
once again, which is exactly what it was all along. You just didnt realize it. Im going
to have to start thinking on a much smaller scale, considering how limited my and
everyone elses options are, now that no one has any money anymore. A page is just a
page. A page is a page is a page. Not a vision from God. Not the future of animation.
Not a powerful camera lens to a speculative science fantasy universe. Its just a page.
And you know what? I can live with that. I dont mind this limitation of scope one bit.
Im getting older so Im starting to become aware of the limits to what people, pretty
much anyone can do, even the most powerful ones in the world.
After all that work I put into the Mono Saga, its going to become nothing more than
jack shit. Gone are the days of being able to sell anything to a mainstream network on
your own. The only ambitious looking shows from now on are going to be Nike and
MacDonalds tie-ins. Sickening, isnt it? Gee thanks Hub. And what if I dont want to
be part of this corporate bullshit machine. Does that mean Ill be paid by the
government for the rest of my life. Im a victim of the current corporate structure.

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Things are not going to get any better as I get older. The older I get, the worse things
will get, both publicly and privately. At the end of my life Ill be a very stressed and
drained man at 55 or whatever age I die at.
Theres nothing creative to aspire to anymore. Its all an illusion. Every last bit of it.
Its like living in the Holocaust. Creative Holocaust. Creative concentration camp.
Thats what Cartoon Network and Nickelodeon are.
This thing. Whatever is going on. It needs to stop. I quit. To anyone who sees me as
reliable, Im done with you. Thank God for that.
Here I sit. Broken. Alone. Impoverished. Not inspired. And depressed as hell about the
future of just about everything. Things are not looking good for me and my family. Or
my career. Yeah its Doomed. Everything is Doomed eventually. Pretty much.
Everyone will die one way, some day. I so want to shoot my Dad right now. Good I
wish I could just load that glock and fire off a few rounds into his head. But society
wont let me do that, so I dont. I dont like people who are full of shit. Why cant there
be a annoying-full-of-shit-people concentration camp. Thatd be awesome. Commiting
genocide against the annoying and ignorant and full of shit. Theyd be getting what
they deserve.

Saturday, December 31, 2011,

As an artist, I dream of and strive to be at the levels of Todd McFarlane, Eugene
Delacroix, and anime, but ultimately fall short and end up drawing like Tim Burton.
As a writer, I constantly plot and scheme to have a consistent narrative of harmony and
rhythm, like Tarantino, Homer, and JRR Tolkien, but instead, I end up writing like
Kerouac and Lovecraft.
Its the most disorganized, unclean style of writing and drawing youve ever seen in
your life. I spend half my life trying to create perfection, supreme organization, and
harmony. Instead I ultimately end up creating one huge mess.
You dont fall in love with your own drawings, and you dont worship your own
system. Christ wasnt a Christian. Buddha wasnt a Buddhist. Gandhi wasnt a Gandhifollower.
God doesnt let most impatient people and cheaters succeed. Impatience and cheating
hardly ever leads to success. Cheaters never win.

Hmm. I didnt know just how in the real majority I was. Im the majority age: 28, or
twenty-eight. 28 is the majority age. Most people in this world are 28 years old.

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I have a new career path Im pursuing, after discovering just how unstable the
animation and comics markets are. Animation and comics are on a shaky foundation,
which could collapse at any time or moment. Hell, even living in my own house is less
chaotic and more stable than working in animation or comics. So I guess I kind of
lucked out.
Now that Im coming of age, I think Im getting closer to becoming a true real adult.
And if Im an adult, then it will be easier to write mature storylines about adult issues. I
think one of my problems at the beginning of my writing career was that I was trying
to write for a demographic (mature and wise male adult science fiction readers) that
was a lot older and more sophisticated than I was or realized I was. Im so immature
compared to the wise old man. Its like a little kid trying to entertain his parents. To
those 40 and 50 + year old writers and authors, Im sure theyd have no reason to seek
out a child like me for entertainment. Being 30 years old or older means you actually
do have wisdom and experience.
Im 28 years old: The median age of the worlds population! What a relief! For once I
belong to the majority of something, the majority for something. Age: 28: Finally, a
normal characteristic. Finally theres something normal and typical about me. For
once, in terms of age at least, Im most people. Thank God.
I think its kind of obvious that DeviantART isnt really run by adults. Its governed
and run by psychotic mentally ill teenager-hackers. That explains a lot. Very few
people of the majority age actually post or go thereat all really.
Denying other people credit of their miracles and spiritual powers is a sin. A big sin
against God. Its a sin to deny people the right to have faith in their own spiritual
powers. Self-denial is and should be a sin. Denying true miracles is a sin. If I call
something amazing and enlightening a miracle, and acknowledge as a miracle, and you
impede on or discourage that human right, youre impeding on and discouraging God,
not just me and the miracle Im praising. Denying God is a sin.
Things that are God:

Akira the comic

Akira the film
Moebius
Blade Runner
Martial Arts
Fight Choreography
Thaumaturgy
Dense literary works
Epic Stories
My Work
Myself

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Dave Sim
Cerebus
Todd McFarlane
Lord of the Rings
Japanese Manga and Anime (most of it)
Science-Fiction, High Fantasy, Dark Fantasy, Gothic Fantasy
Black Comics, Fighting Comics, Noir, The Color Black
Bill Gates and Barack Obama
FORMLESS CONTENT
CONTENTLESS FORM
FORM + CONTENT
CONTENT + FORM
FORMATTED CONTENT

I have fiction, and a manuscript, but not fiction in a manuscript

I have art, and I have formless comic book pages, but not art in comic book pages.
Theres got to be a way to merge these two main elements, to merge content INTO
form, that Im unaware of or not seeing.
Therefore I will be starting a new journal: the CONTENT+FORM=JOURNAL
A daily journal where I specifically set out to integrate content with/and form, and
format my content into an acceptable FORM@
CONTENT + FORM = FORM@!
Anything that doesnt fit my CONTENT+FORM@JOURNAL is inferior, wont get
me work, and will only cause further frustration from this point on. Anything that isnt
FORM@ is pointless, aimless creativity, which would be not at all worth pursuing.
FORM@JOURNAL wont come easily. Ive already tried and failed to adjust to
FORM@JOURNAL once or a few times before. Its going to be a test of my god given
power, willpower, discipline, stamina, energy, and endurance. But I think if I focus on
fitting my output to FORM@ and scaling it up, I think Ill be more than okay.
Im having a bit of trouble assessing how difficult itll be to adjust to the new FORM@
structure. Could be very hard, could be very easy. Tough to say.
Either way, Im going to have to make a conscious decision to do so, to adjust to
FORM@. Im betting this new adjustment will be rather hard to do in and of itself.

Im looking forward to seeing how the whole Anonymous vs. Viacom war will play
out in 2012. It happened fairly recently. I knew Uncyclopedia hated Viacom, which
they do, but I had no idea both those organizations hated Viacom so much. Should be

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fun to watch. Viacom does its share of intelligence gathering on people like me.
Should be fun to watch someone else hack them for a change.
About 1 hour left until 2012. Perfect timing.

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2012
Chapter 51
(Windows XP)

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Sunday, January 1st, 2012

And so the new year, 2012, starts. Looking forward to the rest of this year. Ill be 29 in
November. Talk about old! And Andrews going to be 30 this year! Unbelievable!
Another year older, another year wiser. Another year closer to death. I will be doing a
considerable amount of soul searching and self-analysis, introspection and contemplation
this year, 2012.
Things to do this year (2012):

Name Change
Buy Rosetta Stone
Fixing keyboard for my laptop
Subscriptions to Forbes, Entertainment Weekly, Animation, and Time

No one should ever work under the impression theres a guarantee of making a lot of
money during their life. A person should never work for the sake of money alone.
Chances are you wont make any money. Im not going to make a lot of money. Ill be
lucky to make $5, let alone $500,000 or $5 million. Me with money just doesnt feel or
seem like me. I dont want a lot of money, and I dont plan to make a lot of money. I just
like drawing, and sketching, and constructing drawings. I have no need to be paid for
that. Its like Stephen King says about writing: If you can do it for free, you can do it
forever. If you can draw for free, you can draw forever. I think one of the things holding
me back initially was my own refusal to accept the idea of me drawing for free. I need to
draw for free. I shouldnt expect payment just because Im drawing. I know its hard, but
I need to learn to draw for free, forever, or at least until a few decades from now.
I can already work for free with my writing.
But I never worked for free with drawing until just now. Until 2012, every time I put
pencil and pen to paper, it was with a silent expectation that Id eventually get paid. My
intentions were more than a little greedy.
Drawing for money = whoring your art out. If the only reason you draw is for money,
either now or in the future, youre a whore. Real artists draw for free. Not for fame,
money, sex, or power.
My art is priceless. I refuse to charge money, dollars, or a price for it. My art is like water
or oxygen. Its too abundant and valuable to put a dollar sign on, just like my writing.
No wonder I didnt like drawing at the beginning of my career. The only reason I used to
draw was for money. Because I never made money, I set myself up for depression and
disappointment. Money isnt important. It doesnt matter. Im a Buddhist. Im against
crass commercialism and money, especially now.

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If the only reason your picking up a sketchbook is in hopes of making money, now or
anytime down the line, youll fail. The market is competitive and doomed like that. The
only thing it guarantees is that anyone who matters loses, and that only losers will win.
You dont go into animation, and indie comics to make money. Because honestly, you
wont make that much.

Successful indie comic book artists in the heyday of the 90s made less than
$5,000.
Artists working for CN in the mid 90s got paid $50,000 for the sale of a show.

The worlds most successful inventors can make up to $100 billion or more
Steven Spielberg during the 90s made $500 million a year
The YouTube Founders in 2006 made $300 million a year

You have to be incredibly famous to become rich. Everyone has to know who you are
and respect you for you to make anything. No one respects you, you dont make any
money. Thats the way it works. It always has been.
POSITIVE High Status and Fame Level = High Level Salary (Youre filthy rich)
Negative or normal Low class status and low class fame = Low Level Salary (You get
paid, but not much)
Social Taboo Commodities

Sex
Money
Power
Genius
Popularity
Fame
Glamour

These are the things half the population sells and/or is willing to shell out money for
Apparently, I have Zen-like patience in times of great difficulty and adversity. Thisis
definitely a time of adversity and difficulty.
I get my payment on Tuesday. Supposedly tomorrow is a federal holiday. So the check
gets here on Tuesday.
James M. Alberts

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Monday, January 02, 2012,

CREATIVE BLOCKAGE
I seem to be having a bit of a dry spell, where I dont produce any work for days on end:
In particular, artwork and comic book art, as well as fiction writing and scriptsall
partially due to depression, fame-anxiety, and fatigue.

Okay. Im now drawing again, and this time, in 2012, Im using an all new strategytechnique. Im using an all new pencilling technique that pretty much cuts down on the
mistakes I make. No wonder my pencils have become so ink-like and heavy handed.
The reasons are:
A) Im drawing with an ink pen too much.
B) Im using too dark of and heavy a pencil lead.
Pencilling Strategies
You see, Ive finally wised up and started using a light colored lead Light Blue
Prismacolor Pencil to automatically make the first draft of my penciled pages light as a
feather, instead of heavy as a rock. Its really making a difference. Pencils dont have to
be defined solely by the first attempt and effort to create them. If you use a Light Blue
Prismacolor Pencil with light blue lead, you can barely even see the mistakes of your
pencil first draft. Its hard to get a pencil sketch right on only the first attempt and first
pencil stroke. You start off by pencilling very lightly with a Light Blue Lead Prismacolor
Pencil, then go over the first pencil draftwhich I can barely seewith a mechanical or
No. 2 Pencil to add definition. Pretty awesome.
I used this strategy, and every drawing I did, upon the darker pencil and more refined
draft, once I refined and defined itthe pencil image, turned out pretty perfect. Drawing
a first draft pencil sketch with a a heavy handed, thick, heavy leaded mechanical pencil is
like trying to do charcoal shading with a marker: It just doesnt work. So Im trying new
drawing methods. Im actually starting to develop a drawing process strategy.
Newest Drawing Process Strategy: The Blue-Line Pencil Strategy
From now on, most of, if not all my pencilling and sketch drawings are going to start off
as Blue-Line Pencil Prismacolor Pencil Drawings, and Ill ad details with a mechanical
pencil after the Blue-Line Draft is done.
Did around 8-9 pages of Blue-Line sketches today, most of which were cleaned up and
refined with a darker (mechanical) pencil later.

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Drawing is getting a lot easier now that I use the Blue-Line technique. It didnt really
take any extra effort. Wore my hand out, but it took quite a bit less of an effort to finish
todays pencil sketches and comic book pages. I should have used the Blue-Line
technique on comic book pages and storyboard sketches all along.

Pretty sure my art dry spell has ended. Especially since pencilling has become as easy as
it has!
This Blue-Line Strategic Technique has taught me a valuable lesson. I need to approach
my drawing process from a much higher problem solving and strategic perspective.
Makes work a lot more efficient. I cant believe Ive talked about strategy for this long
and never thought to apply some of that problem-solving strategic-technique thinking to
my actual drawing process, as applied through books that teach you how to teach
yourself.

[second half repeated from last journal for emphasis]

Blue-Line Pencils &
FORMLESS CONTENT
CONTENTLESS FORM
FORM + CONTENT
CONTENT + FORM
FORMATTED CONTENT
I have fiction, and a manuscript, but not fiction in a manuscript
I have art, and I have formless comic book pages, but not art in comic book pages.
Theres got to be a way to merge these two main elements, to merge content INTO
form, that Im unaware of or not seeing.
Therefore I will be starting a new journal: the CONTENT+FORM=JOURNAL
A daily journal where I specifically set out to integrate content with/and form,
and format my content into an acceptable FORM@
CONTENT + FORM = FORM@!
Anything that doesnt fit my CONTENT+FORM@JOURNAL is inferior, wont get
me work, and will only cause further frustration from this point on. Anything that isnt
FORM@ is pointless, aimless creativity, which would be not at all worth pursuing.
FORM@JOURNAL wont come easily. Ive already tried and failed to adjust to

P a g e | 225

FORM@JOURNAL once or a few times before. Its going to be a test of my god given
power, willpower, discipline, stamina, energy, and endurance. But I think if I focus on
fitting my output to FORM@ and scaling it up, I think Ill be more than okay.
Im having a bit of trouble assessing how difficult itll be to adjust to the new FORM@
structure. Could be very hard, could be very easy. Tough to say.
Either way, Im going to have to make a conscious decision to do so, to adjust to
FORM@. Im betting this new adjustment will be rather hard to do in and of itself.

FORM@ + Blue Line Pencilling = Blue-Line FORM@

These two elements work well together, and their efficiency seems damn near deadly.
Every time I sit down at my table or with a sketchbook to draw, I need to ask, Whats
my strategy going to be for this drawing this time around? What techniques, strategies,
and supplies am I going to use on this drawing piece? I need to stop mindlessly diving in
without thinking about it.
Newer Techniques and Strategies

Blue-Line Pencilling
FORM@ Comics
Thumbnail sketches
Storyboard Scaling
Photoshop Elements (Copy & Pasting)
Manga Studio Pro
Scene Outlines
Scene Fiction Writing
Acrylic Color Hues

Just finished a new sketch. Thats the 10th one today! Man Im happy! This new strategictechnique of mine doesnt even seem like it has any weak spots. And it might not, but it
needs to be tested a bit more before I can verify that its officially invincible. As long as I
have the right materials, its no problem at all really. Actually, its very easy to get new
art done this way. Way easier than before. No lamo TV is getting in the way of that.
Finished 2 more pages. Thats a total of 12 for today so far. Im on fire!
In the last 4 days, Ive drawn a total of 35 pages of artwork, with almost half of it being
today. Im pretty happy with that.

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Out of the last 35 pages Ive drawn in the last 4 days, 12 of those pages were
unconventional nonlinear comic 4-panel comic book pages, but comic book pages
nonetheless. Man, Im getting better.
Barack Obama:
Improved social security, increased my government paycheck, he got elected as the first
African-American and multiracial President of the United States, he improved Americas
World Credibility, he ended the War on Terror and got all the troops out of Iraq, he has a
twitter account, he wants the rich to be held accountable, he helped kill Bin Laden, he
helped encourage the Arab Spring, he won the Nobel Prize, he authored 2 books, hes an
eloquent public speaker, he was 2011s most admired man in the world, hes helping to
end terrorism and racism, hes made TIME Magazines Person of the Year.
On Democracy: We hold these truths to be self-evident, that all men are created equal.
Life, Liberty, and the Pursuit of Happiness

Wednesday, January 04, 2012

Im an important player in the new TV, movie, internet, comics, and animation
movements of the New Millennium. Whatever I do plays an integral role, because I kind
of matter in general. Im one of the leaders of these recent movements (2001-2012). Like
any good revolution leader, Im a 1 man army, in terms of raw strength and power.
While I am a big fan of sci-fi anime, I have my share of criticisms of it, not so much of
the art in particular, but specifically, the writing. Anime sci-fi writing is lost in
translation. As beautiful as shows like Gundam and Ghost in the Shell are to look at, they
lack comprehension and clarity in their writing. Half the time, you cant even tell what
the hell is going on in each scene, especially the dialogue scenes. Like the first scene in
Ghost in the Shell: The Film: Who are the corrupt figures being thwarted Motoko
Kusanagi and her thermo-optic camouflage? Corrupt politicians? Corrupt gangsters?
Drug Dealers? Corrupt businessmen? What are they negotiating. You cant even decipher
what the hell theyre talking about. I dare anyone to understand Ghost in the Shell
without using the Wikipedia cheatsheet. Cant be done. The story of complex anime is
mostly lost in translation. What the hell is actually going on? What the hell is happening?
In my opinion, most of the time, the more complex an anime story is, the more clarity it
lacks. The audience cant follow whats going on.
My writing is easier to comprehend. I dont go out of my way to be esoteric.
Every script page I write is gold. Every comic book page I do is gold. Ive got the
screenwriting Midas touch! And the Sequential Art Midas touch!

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American animation writing is too simple, and Japanese animation writing is often too
complex. There needs to be a middle groundsomething more accessible to the common
viewer.
Historically, animation in any country has always been harder to make, which is why it
started off looking so simple in the beginning, because unlike with live action movies and
TV, you cant just bust out a camera, film whats standing and pre-existing in front of
you with little interference, and call it a day. Nothing is magic in animation. Everything is
hand-created: The actors, the people, the voices, the costumes and props, the sets, the
sound, special effects, the story, the motion, the timing and pacing. Everything!
Animation literally has to be made from nothing as the filmmaker goes along. So in a
way, its forgivable that all animation has evolved from and started off as Wacky Hair
and the Hair-Bear Bunch: just a lot of crappy, hyper-simplistic stuff from the Disney,
Hannah-Barbera, and Warner eras. Those were the training wheels that led up to detail
and realistic writing in animation, that weve seen emerge from anime. Give any creative
medium, from anime to film, 50-100 years to improve and evolve over time, and it wont
even feel like your looking at the same medium, it will have improved over the passage
of time so much.

Damn. I want to get started at writing again, lately. Ive wanted to do some more writing,
but unfortunately nothings coming to me.
I really want to write more scene outlines, but nothings coming. No ideas are coming to
me. Im drawing a blank.
The No. 1 Thing Im drawing a Blank Over is: Location. Setting. Place. I dont know
where to place my story and characters. When writing scenes and scene outlines Ill often
want to start fresh, by picking all new locales that I havent written about before.
Also, Wikipedia has TONS of writing in it, and so does Google Books. Those are prowriting websites. Theres writing everywhere on the web.
Places with Settings and Locations to write about: Anime, Action and Adventure Films,
Wikipedia, Netflix Instant.
Well, I do gotta hand it to the anime, co-production, LucasFilm, Dark Horse, Tokyopop,
videogame, webcomics, comic book, JM Animation, DeviantART, Funimation,
YouTube, and Hollywood industries: They get an A+ for diversity. Theyre way more
diverse than the CNs, Viacoms, Viz, Nickelodeons, Disneys, Microsofts, Warner
Brothers, and Adult Swims of the world, which are all mostly only American, and
intentionally so. Those guys only want to hire Token Ethnic/foreigner Artists. Its
Token Diversity. Not half as diverse as the industries doing what I do: The Black
Apocalypse Crowd

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And speaking of diversity: Currently, theres way more women, girls, and general
females working in the American, international, and Japanese anime, manga, and French
anime industries then there have ever been females working in regular American nonJapan inspired animation and comics
Dark Fantasy and Black Noir Comics were not originally a Japanese or Asian creation.
Dark Fantasy, Gothic Comics, and Black Noir comics are primarily an American
creation, just like the Web 2.0. Asians have no education in or real appreciation of this
area. What Japan does to Black Noir is, at best, a superficial flirtation and pretentious
duplication, with rare exceptions. Many Japanese dont seem to understand that just
because you color something shadowy gray in Photoshop does not automatically qualify
it as sharpie marker black. Gray isnt black! What are you? Colorblind?
There still are some places I go to discover new comics: Amazon, Mangafox,
DeviantART, Twitter, Amazon.fr, Amazon.co.jp, Webcomics Nation (WCN), & Lulu.
Theres still good comics out there. But its like its always been. You have to look for
them.
Im reading a real cool online manga that reminds me of Parallax and Priest, titled
Jackals. I found that one on Mangafox. Its thoroughly amazing and well executed. Very
fast intense action pacing. One of the best action comics Ive ever read. It would be a
crime if Jackals didnt get licensed in America. Pretty sure its another Manwha, which
would explain the potential Min-Woo Hyung influence.
My parents are not good with naming things. They did name me Joe initially, after all.
What a horrible, horribly overused name. Im glad Im killing its circulation.
Next StepStart soon. Nothing currently being aired on regular cable TV will provide
sufficient inspiration, other than maybe Star Wars or Generator Rex:
I want to, and I need to, draw 1 page of 4 quality panels, on 4 panel computer template
paper. It needs to be made up, based on my own mirror pose, or based on tons of comics
and/or Jackals reference material I have printed from Mangafox. Ill blue-line it, then
darken the lines with a mechanical pencil, and then maybe shade and ink it (if the pencils
look okay). Im setting the bar low, just above suck level.
Parallax is good, and Im very proud of much of the work done on it, and my tenacious
dedication to the project. As of now its been 9 years in the making. In 2013, it will be an
even 10 years spent working on the Parallax pilot and manuscript.
[Strong Area] Writing
[Not as Strong Area] Artwork: Lots of hype, and lots of digital technological bullying,
abuse, and intimidation from the outside world. Lots of general baggage and needless
stress goes with it. I dont always Just Do It and Just Do The Work. Its actually
borderline painful and traumatic at times, especially in the recent past. And then there
was the Bryan and DA-Network plagiarism fiasco that only added to an already chaotic,

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hectic, disorganized, overly intuitive, and un-strategic process. Overshadowed by TV and

internet. Historically, I havent just done it for myself for the most part. Ive gotten a lot
of pressure from a lot of people, coming at me yelling at me, pressuring me to keep
drawing. I dont take time to recharge like I do with my writing. But I should. More
difficult to teach myself.
Engineering is hacking.
Ive engineer-hacked the following software, hardware, and devices that are digital
Video Uploading (uploading anime to regular video sites)
Windows Media Player
My Flatscreen TV
Digital Voice Recorder
DVD-Rs
DVD-RWs
Windows Media Video files
CDs
DVDs
My PCs TV Tuner
Internet Video Websites
Flash Video Online
Glomera
I am brilliantly innovative. My next trick is going to be recording an arsenal of mp3 radio
show files on Windows Media Player, using a Digital Voice Recorder instead of
recording directly through a microphone with little range. Instead Id be using a portable
recording device: A digital mp3 tape voice recorder.

The Warrior Art of the Sword:

Ken-Jutsu
Ken-Jutsu. Its the art of swordsmanship and sword wielding. I do my best to study and
practice artistic and creative choreography and interpretation of the art of Ken-Jutsu.

Im editing the ripped discs of my Yu Yu Hakusho Complete Series DVD box set, which
I love times a million. Im starting with episode 1. Theres pretty much nowhere to buy or
download episodes of Yu Yu Hakusho that I can actually download from and feel good
about. Online uploading of anime is starting to get a little excessive, nothing against it. I
just prefer the official releases when it comes to the hits and classics like Yu Yu.
Longer series I like and want to buy or already have and want to complete and own on
my computer to watch on my laptop and TV in WMV: Yu Yu Hakusho, Naruto,
Naruto Shippuden, Pokemon, Rurouni Kenshin, Digimon, Dragon Ball Z, Fullmetal

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Alchemist, Inuyasha, Kiba, Bleach, Evangelion, Read or Die, Witch Hunter Robin,
Heat Guy J, Samurai Champloo, Yu-Gi-Oh, Home Movies, Batman, Daria, Family
Guy, South Park, The Boondocks, American Dad, The Simpsons, Spongebob
Squarepants, Chaotic Marillian Invasion.
Thursday, January 12, 2012,
DeviantART is really forgery art. If its an image of a famous anime character like
Ichigo or Naruto (who have the same hair), or a rip off of one of my pieces, its definitely
a forgery. Fanart is okay, but a lot of so-called Fanart on DA is just traced, cut-andpasted, or photocopied, and therefore forged, or illegal, and easy to detect for a fraud.
Power doesnt need to flaunt itself, unlike force, which always does.
The ability to express myself is a power. Every drawing I do, every page of writing and
screenwriting I do manifests and displays great power, no matter how dissatisfied I
initially am with it, no matter how weak I think it is. Every piece of expression I
manifest reflects great power
Theres no such thing as a question with an answer that doesnt already exist. All real
questions have answers.
Ive spent too much time asking questions about mysteries that no one can answer yet.
Ive asked way too many theoretical questions that dont have answers.
Ive spent too much time trying to do the impossible. Answer questions without answers.
New Studio, Company, and Publisher Name(s)?
Dreamroller Production
Dreamroller Media

Its no secret that I apply the martial arts style of living to my work, hobbies, life, comic
book literature-screenwriting, and animation-comic-book art. I dont just practice,
theorize, and strategically-conceptualize with martial arts. I want to be at one with my
creative subject matter. I believe the martial arts lifestyle can improve the quality and
level of the cinematic animation and comic book literary lifestyle. The two elements are
like Yin & Yang. They benefit eachother.
Ive become an unmotivated and rusty character designer. I havent designed a single
new character. Ever since I Mastered Mono, Ive become addicted to drawing Mono and
no one else. Kinda sad. This is going to change. Im going back into character design
Mode. I think I want to draw more characters of the Warrior and Suburban
persuasion.

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Contour Overlap Theory

The Overlap Comics Panel Theoryone of my biggest problems drawing comic
pages was that, for a long time, without knowing it, I wasnt allowing myself to let
my compositions aggressively overlap. Where characters are standing in front of the
camera, shoulder too shoulder, where the contours of the character merge, as
opposed to shoulder across the room from shoulder. A crowded composition is a
good composition. Often, when drawing multi-character panels, the shoulders
should be touching, not segregated. It helps add more rhythm and
multidimensionality to a panel.
Contour overlap compositions are important because Just because lines and things in a
composition are touching, doesnt automatically mean those things are touching, not
without overlap. And sometimes not even IF they use overlap. Its all about spatial
arrangement. Panel illustration skills are all about coordination and spatial reasoning
skills.
God. There are so many comics out there with both horrible art and horrible writing.
Most of the comics on Webcomics Nation are pretty darn bad. There are a LOT of bad
artists and bad writers out there. I fucking hate bad superhero and bad indie comics and
bad American manga comics art.
Well send him cheesy TV. The worst we can find. La la la.
Hell have to sit and watch them all and well monitor his mind, la la la.
No keep in mind Joe cant control when the TV begins or ends
Thats why he used his special bots to make the YouTube Friends
YouTube Roll Call
Google
Adult Swim
Toonami
Crow
I find subliminal (but still very intentional and internalized) reverse psychology
techniques are great for reversing the roles of the things I want to do and the things I
dont actually do all that much.
For instance, look how many books I actually paid money for and bought. What are they
about? Writing Fiction and screenwriting. What kind of fictions and scripts did I actually
write while all that emphasis was going on. A dozen pages? At most.
Meanwhile I put no forethought or effort into Journal writing. Its been all Action and
Execution, albeit thoughtlessly and recklessly so. Virtuosic, but with no melody. I dont
even feel like Im writing it. I write thousands of pgs. I blaze through it.

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So what if the roles of desire and action-execution were reversed.

What if I said consciously I wanna write more Journals, and put painstaking planning
efforts into writing each Journal chapter, and freaked myself out
And what if on the other hand I just pounded out anything with dialogue, description,
narration, and action in it, without any editing, forethought, or formatting. Just raw
cerebral release, very similar to what I did with my Journals between 2000 & 2011.

Friday, January 13, 2012,

Journal and Fiction Role Reversal!
I tried the technique earlier tonight, and pounded out 3 pages of fiction in a evening!
Amazing. It really does work!
Thats the secret. Its not about what I write about or how I write it. Its about reverse
psychology, reversing roles, and doing the old switcheroo.
Authors to read books by:
William Gibson
Chuck Palahniuk
HP Lovecraft
Mario Puzo
They write like I do.

Wrote 5 short stories today, which equals about 1,800 words of brand new fiction written
today, and its all thanks to reverse psychology. Apparently the Reverse Psychology
Technique is one of my most powerful Mental Techniques. Ive got to write something
each day. May as well be fiction.
If there something Ive learned today, its that when Im mad is NOT the only time Im
able to create.
Somebody pissed me off not to long ago, so technically that would make it an even 6
short stories, one about the suicide of the person pissing me off.
From now on, Im approaching Manifestoand dealing with iton a Chapter-byChapter basis.

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I dont need a fancy book binding anymore. I just need printed copies of Manifesto, as a
miniature testament to the fact that I wrote it, for posterity. Ill let each chapter be a
manuscript in and of itself, printed out where I bind each chapter together.
I think what I really want is acceptance. Someone who will accept me as is, without
hating, criticizing, overanalyzing or trying to generally change me. I dont find any of
that in TV or comics or art. Thats withheld from me. I like 2 things: Comfort and
acceptance. I dont have time for people who dont have time for this.

Sunday, January 15, 2012,

Closed Fields:
(American) TV Animation
Theatrical Animation
Printed Comics and Graphic Novels (Image, Dark Horse, Oni, SLG, Marvel, DC)
Open Fields
Webcomics (Website, Sequential Art)
Unpublished Novels (Spec Manuscript)
Spec Screenwriting (Script)
France Animation (Series Literary Bible)
World Co-Productions (Literary Bible)
Chinese Comics/Animation (Sequential Art, Series Bible)
Indie and American Manga Comics (Sequential Art)
Victory, Success, and Genius are defined, quite simply by the thickness of the stack of
sheets you have to your name. Just like Tezuka, Otomo, Toriyama, and Dave Sim.
Star Wars: The Clone Wars, the CGI series I love so much, has mastered a storytelling
technique Ive always loved ever since Ive seen it in things like Spawn and science
fiction anime. Its the feeling of ourselves, as an audience being dropped from the
heavens above and landing softly in the middle of an Epic Saga, an Epic Struggle, a
Masterpiece of Conflict and War, with 2 or more opposing sides, and just being right in
the middle of this massive universe or world thats very alive with wonder, awe, and
strife. That is one of the things Parallax wants to achieve, that I want to achieve, suddenly
showing up, ghostlike as a passive and invisible observer, eavesdropping on this stoic and
chivalrous sequence of historic events in some fictional timeline or world, watching the
social, hierarchical, strategic, and compositional complexity unfold in front of us. Thats
the best kind of a sense of atmosphere one can have. Its another way of describing
literary and cinematic atmosphere. Its the result of world building.

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You know, I was actually caught up in Believing that article over at that one website
about the Death of Creator-Owned Animation Industry, until I found out from a
credible source articles like those are typically of the websites business model. Write a
detailed article about the animation industry in America being Doomed for all aspiring
creators, sit back, kick back and watch youre readership figures go through the
roofThen, profit from being an Animation Press Nostradamus. Actually, that
underhanded and deceitful form of business fear mongering is VERY profitable. Its an
effective technique. But I even have a way of using articles like that to my advantage.
Now that I know its bogus according to more official sources that I checked incognito, I
can use this myth to my advantage. If the article wants to convince everyone selling a
project is impossible now, and everyone DOES end up believing that lie, that it will never
happen again, EVER, then I can quietly use that myth to increase my own stature, and
appear to do the impossible, which is simply and easily do the opposite of what that
article says, which would be sell a show and profit. Succeed in an industry of failure
and all that.
I know of 1 show thats creator driven, and its an anime and co-pro (for those keeping
score, Im obviously talking about Jared Wolfson and the other co-creator of Monsuno.
To say nothing of the Avatar: The Last Airbender franchise, which is less than 10 years
old). The American anime market is still very alive and well. Its the Comedy market
thats sort of suffering. Im actually not in a bad position. The whole Online Nostradamus
of JMs Auteur Career in Anime thing is lame, and false. Its one big lie started by some
animation sensationalist website. Like I said, lame. And a lie. Im just as likely to sell a
show as anyone else in TV. Im not the only one striving for this goal either. Lets see.
Theres Dentsu (Deltora Quest, Monsuno), HBO (The Life and Times of Tim), JM
Animation (GI Joe: Resolute). American Anime, American Manga, and American
Manga-Ka are such loaded terms now, with quite a bit of negative connotations.
Nowadays, its best to be a generalist, not a specificist, and not get weighted down in
rhetoric. Bad move. Thats loaded territory. I dont know if its such a hot idea to team up
with anyone whos all that established. Most of those guys are just waiting to sell you out
and stab you in the back, to say nothing of judging your character unfairly, and in as
deceitful and biased a manner as possible. Dont do dealings with the big boys. Definitely
NOT Adult Swim, and Definitely NOT Film Roman. They pretty much hate me. A lot. I
know better than to turn to them. Even Nicktoons with their Monsuno and future
American and Japanese shows like it, would be better than Adult Swim and Film Roman,
for business and marketing decisions.
Actually, YOU dont seem to get it, pal. It DOES work like that. And you CAN Just
stop posting Just like that. Hate to tell you, but it IS that simple. I SIGNED online epaperwork to be ALLOWED TO POST. I never signed ANYTHING that said I had to
KEEP POSTING. Thats kind of a pain in the ass. Ive got work to produce. The more I
linger with this fact, the more I realize posting anything to an anonymous collective is an
incredibly bad idea compared to just working on stuff for myself, and myself only. Well,
until I die anyway. Which wont be for at least a few decades.
Densest Graphic Fiction I Own:

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Dragon Ball Z (I own almost all of the first half)

Cerebus (I own at least 1/4th of this series
Akira (I own the entire series)
Spawn and Paul Pope (just 1 of each)

Second Rate (Not First)

Scud
Bone

On the Waiting List:

A Drifting Life (Graphic Novel)

Sin City (series, I own volume 1)
Scott Pilgrim (series)
Demo
Henry Darger

In terms of Graphic Fiction, 1,000 is my lucky number. So are 22 and 7.

I was very giving in the beginning of this thing, until certain people online kept
repeatedly abusing the fact that they were using up way too much of my now rare free
time, arguing with me, lecturing me, wagging their fucking fingers at me like Im some
fucking idiot. Well, fuck them. Even I have somewhere to be. Im not such a loser that I
dont have a daily life and work schedule to keep. Im quite important. Time is important
and valuable to me. It is to anyone with a list of things to get done each day. I really
honestly, dont care about people who want to do nothing but waste my time with
pointless matters that make nothing happen. I quite frankly dont have that much time to
waste. Certainly not enough time to debate things with random losers Ive never met
and who dont have anything to show for it otherwiseonline. My time is quite valuable.
I may as well use it on work.
Maybe I shouldnt go on like this, but, I appreciate time. Time is beneficial and useful.
Time is valuable. Time is not something to be destroyed or wasted, even for the sake of
boredom. WE ALL have better things to do. We ALL have somewhere we should
probably be instead of where we are now. Why are we still here? Why the hell arent we
there, doing what were supposed to, achieving whatever goal weve set for ourselves?
Its because deep down, the majority of people want to waste their time, and everyone
elses. Especially teens and kids. The youngsters have no conception of actual real time,
thanks to the internet destroying that perception. Its a mess. Time still matters to me. I
dont like to be late for appointments, and I dont like to be late to my destination, or late
in reaching my goal. No thank you. Ive come to openly despise people who dont
appreciate the value of time. Quite a bit of time has gone buy in my life. Enough for me
to realize time is valuable and history is the real source of current power. You have a
history, you have power. Kids dont really have a life history (i.e. biography) most of the

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time, especially not physically, and therefore they have no real power. Fortunately, in the
last 12 years Ive learned and taught myself how to use my time wisely. Because in the
future, with the more famous and iconic I get, with the more status I might one day
have access to, Ill have even less free time, just enough to write a script, novel, or draw a
comic book page here and there. Just the important things. The older I get the more of a
bad vibe I get from the concept of wasted time and resources, whether its in media,
business, or daily life. Im not in a hurry (for the most part). I just really hate being made
the fool or victim. I dont and will not allow that to ever be true about myself, no matter
whos conspiring.

Things to be done:
Rip my YouTube Favorites Section Videos to my Laptops Hard Drive. All 1,500 of
them or so. Theyre all short so they wont take up much room on my comp
My brother Andrew, who lives with me, cant handle or live with real overabundant
power or success. Whenever he gets just a tiny drop of power, success, and authority, he
goes crazy, and becomes very arrogant, sociopathic, and generally angry and psychotic.
Success, fame, and power turn my family into monsters. Im the only one that can really
handle this level of power. My parents and brother certainly cant. Ive seen how they
react when they have just a little bit of what I have in spades. Its like watching them
morph into deranged ugly-faced politicians. They have no sense of real responsibility or
control to deal with my kind of power Sell the Time Share! SELL THE TIME
SHARE!!!
I really, really hate the current roster of American TV animation creators for the most
part. American artists are so lazy, selfish, and uncreative. Just the idea of getting lumped
in with such lazy fucks really, disturbs me.
Well, the good news is, Im in the talent and genius minority. 99.9999% of the worlds
population dont have any form of a clue, or propensity, whatsoever, to do the kinds of
things I pride myself on doing. 99.9999% of the worlds population doesnt know or have
any clue how to draw just like I do, or know how to draw, sketch, pencil, and ink a
finished comic book page, nor do they know how to write a script, a novel, or draw
layouts or a storyboard. Im in the epic minority. Im special. Very special. Pretty much
no one else has done or knows how to do the things Ive done, who isnt blatantly
copying me.
All right! 30 pages, even, of fiction writing completed in 1 month, bitch(es)!!!! This is the
first month, January of 2012, that Ive seriously tried to attempt fiction writing. Great!
Consistency! Thats the kind of behavior I actually want to see in myself.
Reverse psychology is pretty effective for instigating work productivity. Just say youve
got to do all the things you hate to do in reality. Your brain wont know the difference,

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and will get to work on the opposite of useless, important. Works like a charm. Quite
efficient.
Work total, as of December of 2011 and halfway through this month, January, 2012
Total Pages of Fiction Completed: 30 pages fiction writing.
Total Pages of Artwork Completed: 47 pages of art.
Some were done in blue-line, and one was completed on 11 x 17 paper
That didnt even take any real energy. That was me goofing off. I wonder what it will be
like, how many pages Ill clock in at when Im going full force. For some reason this
doesnt feel like full force though. Still, I did a ton of work though.
So theres the recent fiction writing: 30 pages
+And then theres the older fiction writing, written last year, in 2011: 20 pages
That would mean Ive written a total of 50 pages of fiction narrative.
Thats of the way to attaining my long-term goal: a narrative of 200 pages.
If I stick to my guns, I might just be able to finish writing 100 first draft pages of fiction.
I havent even been writing for a year, and Im right around fiction narrative page 50,
whether its dialogue, or description, or narration, or fight scenes, or storytelling: Doesnt
matter. I do it all. I kind of have to. Im finally starting to write fiction and narrative and
stories semi-consistentlyand all coherently. If theres any plot holes, I just put that page
aside to be filled in with structure and answers and explanations later.
Blue-Line Pencil Drawing
Reverse Psychology
FORM@
+11 x 17 Paper
Better Artwork More Often!!!!
And also: Contour overlap compositions

Monday, January 16, 2012,

Drawing Comics on:
11 x 17 Paper
Pros vs. Cons:
Pros:

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More Space to Draw on

More Room in each panel
More room for detail
Epic
Cons:

More Work in Some Instances

More Room to Fill Up
Takes More time /
Longer Amount of time to draw each panel (in some instances
Same:

Still comics and Comic Books

Still Panels
Same Paper Brand and Texture
Same Drawing Supplies
Same idea, just bigger in scale
Thats my vision! Gothic. Deep, dark, macabre, and twisted. Thats how I write just
about every script. Just the way I like it. But not Too Scary.
1/16/12
I finished my first novels manuscript today: Sitting pretty at 120 pgs. Its a manuscript of
fiction stories, short stories and fiction writing. Its not agent ready yet, but if I continue
doing what Im doing Ill have written numerous novels in the next year or five.
I wrote and finished the first draft of a 120 pg. novel. I am The Man. Its really just a
downhill battle. Easy as all fuck.
Nope, not really striving to be the next big author, the next George R.R. Martin, or JK
Rowling, or Christopher Paolini. Im not striving to be branded as the heir to any famous
author, or viewed as any authors kin really. While Im sure people will compare me to
whoever they see fit to compare me to, Im more concerned with the writing itself than
my actual social success, rank, wealth, or status, even if I do eventually have those things
one day. General and Speculative Fiction are not as hard of a genre for me to write for as
I just simply assumed they would be. I used to think writing general and speculative
fiction would be the most impossible thing in the world for me, until I actually tried it.
The things I readwhich I myself had written at some pointcompelled, edified, and
deeply entertainment. Even from the beginning I saw real potential for a career to break
out there.

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In a certain sense, I, am in one sense, an Aristocrat. An Aristocrat of work ethic, genius,

and talent anyway. I believe Aristocracy is Earned more often than simply bestowed.
You want the good life, you have to work for it, and play fairly. No cheating.
I am a bit of a negligent family figure. I dont often tend to things that dont involve my
work or goals. Im pretty certain I inherited the negligence gene from my birth parents,
Mary Ann and Glen.

There are a few production elements Ive actually gotten pretty good at:

Delivering high quality production visuals on a shoestring budget

Cross the line between Homage and originality (i.e. Doujin)
Deliver high impact Action Screenwriting, and deliver High Impact Scripts
Narrate, Poetically
Edit Video for Online Purposes
Deliver a top notch content delivery website

I dont know if Ill ever be anywhere near the level of GAINAX, with Otaku No Video,
but it couldnt hurt reaching that sort of level. Well, GAINAX, Thomas Romain, and
Production I.G. Just all the international animation intelligentsia.

Poor Lindsey. A model student and employee. Supportive, devoted, consistent, candid,
loyal. Outside Corey, stonergoth187, Broken Elements, and Steve Blum, shes the best
worker and collaborator Ive ever had! I miss her a lot. Politically, she did everything
right. Art wise she just isnt all that good compared to other artists Ive seen. Shell do
great things if she works a little harder though. Shes young, she has time.
Ive managed to succeed in writing short fiction, short stories. Writing novels is more
challenging, but maybe I could write a sequence of chapters or short stories.
Writing books is going to be my ticket to Europe. Ill be able to afford that car, that
cruise, that trip to Europe, and that house or hotel in Europe from having a book being
sold many times over. Book writing is a lucrative business. Very lucrative. Writing
fictional novels is one of the most lucrative career choices one can make. But it helps to
have an agent and talent
Tennis! What a great sport. I used to take Tennis lessons, at Red Bug Park in Red Bug
and from what I remember I was pretty good! Playing Tennis is a lot of fun:
Favorite Games:

Chess
Tennis
Stratego

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Chinese Checkers
Solitaire
Pool
Foosball

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Chapter 52

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Tuesday, January 17, 2012

Academic Subjects I Actually Sort of know:
Technology
English
Art
Music
Current Events
Strategy
Pop Culture
History
Philosophy
Culture
Systems
Literature
New Age
Paranormal Studies
Least Strong/Favorite Traditional Subjects
Sports
Business
Economics
Science
Politics
Military Strategy
Education
Academics
Law
Medicine
Biology
Chemistry
World Studies (Most)
Cultural Science
Electricity
Performing Arts
Theatre

Ive started using a detangler spray. Something one of my barbers once recommended to
me when she was cutting my hair. Its great! My hair doesnt look like a rats nest at all,
and Ive only been using a detangler spray on my hair for one evening! Finally, I dont
look like non-detangler anti-Semite Clown-Hitler anymore.

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Ive never written fiction over an extended period before. This is a first for me. I might be
writing more and more outline sheets by hand from this point on, to combat Hollywood
plagiarism and people who want to release my ideas before theyre actually completed.
Thursday, January 19, 2012,
Damn, Im such a good Manager, or perhaps I should say: Producer, Executive Producer.
I make a good boss. Just ask stonergoth187, my part time employee. And Lindsey. So far
Ive been the Editor and Editor in Chief of every book Ive published, seeing as theyre
all self-publishing Print-On-Demand books. Its the way of the future you know.
Though I do like to think in broad panoramic terms, I realize now that I have to
micromanage employees. I have to sell to each one of my employees my enthusiasm for
my vision. Youre employees will like you better if you prove you care about each one of
them individually, not just the collective. You dont want to be a Team Spirit Nazi. Bad
idea. Sometimes you have to be, like when youre announcing stuff, but its necessary to
show each of your staff and team that you care. Otherwise they wont want to work for or
with you.
Thursday is my lucky day. As of this day, its the day I broke out on some level as an
author and an artist. Its the first day I signed up to be distributed as an self-published
artist-author. I never thought Id have made it to getting one of my books listed on
Amazon this soon. But a can-do DIY spirit, and acceptance of where you are at the
moment helps, if you want a career in publishing, thats anything like the one I could
have.
Honestly? I like the sensitive recluse sex symbol Hyde. As opposed to the evil version of
him that hangs out in dark alleyways in Tokyo and keeps mugging me with his
bandmates every time I visit Japan.
As for me. Why me, they ask? Why NOT me? Yeah, I know you got a Santa list. I
dont care though. Thats the key.
Some people seem to think, because I havent written about Jhonen Vasquez in years,
that must mean hes a jerk or I dont like him anymore, even though Im one of the
greatest Jhonen Biographers and Animation Historians who ever lived this side of
Immortalizing the Moment, Animation Magazine, The Screen Savers, DeviantART,
Suicide Girls, Wikipedia, Twitter, his official Live Journal, and his colleagues online.
And of course the former-Zim cast and staff. But Jhonens quite mainstream in some
ways now. Hes one of a handful of comic book artists from yesterday, the others being
Jamie Hewlett, Scott McCloud, David Hahn, Evan Dorkin, Paul Pope, Ted Naifeh, Jim
Mahfood, Adam Warren, Jill Thompson, Rob Lefield, Jim Lee, Todd McFarlane, Frank
Miller, and Mike Mignola. Well them and pretty much all Japanese manga-ka, purely for
status based reasons. Along with a few others who are probably less notable than the
obvious choices, who I am currently forgetting. All my pals and favorites. Essentially

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anyone I name drop here and/or who has a Twitter account, is probably going to survive
the counterculture transition from print to digital. From the direct market to Amazon.
I can accept the concept of moving from the lows of the bottom of the retail market to the
highs and elations of the top. Most good careers people remember are built that way. That
is how its traditionally been done. My publishing strategy is to continually publish book
after book until I can make a living as an author in retail.

Most anime heads and faces are structured the same way. Anime heads all have the same
shape. Once you know the secrets of how to construct that form, and how its archetypal
visual iconic structure is set up, you can probably draw anime heads with ease. Im
starting to.

Saturday, January 21, 2012,

Saturday: The Mono Design Epiphany

Man, Im still improving at art. Hard to believe how much better Im getting lately. Dare
I say I produced my best, most detailed Character Design Illustration yet today: I did this:

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This portfolio piece is professional, even by McFarlane, Akira, Anime, and Marvel
Comics Standards, which Ill admit are pretty damn high on the art spectrum. I still dont
view myself at those guys level, but Im very close, if not at the beginning stages. It
transcends even Patterns and my End Times 1 cover and illustrations drawings. Good
to know Im still talented and skilled at art. This is the level I can achieve if I really focus
and try. My only pieces that really rival it that arent my Notan Noir Covers would be my
life drawing charcoal art. I had to look at myself in the mirror to get Mono Jubeis arms
right and make them look like they connect with his torso. I kind of added the flares as a
last minute design strategy. I originally wasnt going to have flares, but I forgot he has
flares in every drawing, so I added those too.
If I continue to draw at this level, and draw at this level on comic book paper, and buy a
suitable scanner that fits 11 x 17 paper, I should have no trouble succeeding in
publishing.

The Pre-Mono Morning Beacon Epiphany

Before I did the drawing that changed my career path, the really amazing piece, I had to
wake up in the morning. I was going to sleep in. It was early, like 10 or 11 a.m., when I
had just started starting to wake up. But then my eyelids got heavy. I was falling back
asleep, and had reached a partial dream state, where visions were starting to come into
my minds eye: Dreams. But before I got any further, in the darkness and blackness of
my closed eyes, came a luminosity, from what seemed like a Holy Light I had never seen
before. My visioneven with the blackness of my closed eyelids and dreamswas
illuminated, and my eyes were not even open. Then I opened my eyes with my head
laying on the pillow, and a bright, yet soothing glowing beacon sneaking through the
depressing blinds from a normally depressing backyard. My blinds were closed, but the
sunlight that crept into my room was still directly beaming into my eyesight. It was
spiritual. And then a voice came to me. It was a mixture of an angels voice, and my
memory of how my mother talked to me when she was at her most caring, playful,
affectionate, and sentimental. A composite of my mothers voice and a heavenly
goddess/angel. What. Wh-what is that. Is-is that an angel? I thought.
Get up Joey, My mothers angel voice said.
I couldnt help it. I was awake after that. It was too bizarre. Why was there a beacon of
light shining into my eyes when no one was in the house but Andrew, which I didnt find
out until I got up, went to the bathroom, then walked down the hall to the living room,
where Andrew brought me back to reality, merely by standing there. He was surprisingly
silent though.
Was that a message from God and the Heavens? I thought. Then later in the early
afternoon around noon or 1 or 2, I drew the Mono drawing I pasted on the previous page
in my journal today. Im beginning to think I got a heavenly vision about either my art or
my career. A Dont Give Up Luminosity Beacon.
After I woke up, I watched a little Yu-Gi-Oh!: Waking the Dragons (the last episode for
today) on the CW4Kids with my DVR.

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Really, what is there left to do that I havent already done? Other than have a high status
and earn a lot of money of course. Thats not in my jurisdiction. Money and being
beloved is not part of my jurisdiction.
2002 Low Point of My Life (when everything bad that could happen, Did Happen.)
10 years later
2012 High Point of My Life (Epiphany and Eureka Day, Saturday, new art style/ability)
I live through my art.
If my sketchbooks are turning out good, my life is turning out good
If my sketchbooks are turning out bad, my life is turning out bad
One way or another, regardless of how I feel or how powerful I am, everything starts with
the blank page.
Ive encountered many people in my day. Ive come across a lot of people, some of them
enemies, some friends. There are some who love me, some of whom hate and despise me.
And Im going to meet a lot more people, and probably make many more friends and
some more enemies.
Okay. Its official. My made-up art is now officially as powerful as my original writing
some of the time. No small achievement. But it requires focus and labor in many ways,
something I dont exactly mind giving out lately.
I remember saying something about Switching back into Character Design Mode, and
my art for today has been a reflection of that. Im doing a very good job adapting to the
anime style more than I used to be able to. My work looks more anime-like than ever
before. It looks Japanese. Or French. One or the other, or both. But its definitely very
original looking. People online (and nowhere else) used to say it Resembles Bleach.
Now there is quite the distinction between Mono Jubei, and Ichigo Kurasaki. The styles
of Bleach and Parallax are nothing alike. Not at all similar. Monos closer to Trunks and
Seto Kaiba and Spawn than Ichigo, and Im proud to say that. Im borrowing plenty from
other characters. Just not Ichigo. Not an influence at all really, contrary to popular
internet myth, rumor, and belief. Ive got just as much talent as any artist out there. But
my skill and my level of work ethic have gone up too. Way up.
You kind of should label the things youre drawing in your mind when youre
constructing them on the page. Drawing on the Right Side of the Brain says not to draw
this way, but when youve mastered the techniques in that book like I have, and you
know how to construct everything you draw on paper like I do, labeling the parts of
anatomy, costume, and composition you draw on the page, sounds like it makes things a
might easier.

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I have Power as an Artist (beacon of epiphany)

I have the Power of an Author and Writer (Lulu, Manifesto, Novels, Scripts)
I have the Power of a Businessman (CreateSpace, Amazon)
I have the Power of Publicity and Media (YouTube, Google, Internet, CN, Adult
Swim)

No matter what kind of goal you set for yourself, if the goal is worth pursuing, there will
always be a lot of obstacles (both natural and supernatural) standing in your way. Doing
the right thing doesnt always pay, and it doesnt always happen. God is not always on
your side when youre trying to do the right and noble thing. And sometimes people want
to stand in your way wearing a mask thats a copy of your own face, covered in dirt. But
still, goals are worth pursuing, no matter the obstacle.

SOPA and PIP got postponed which probably means public outcry killed the bill.
Good riddance. Down with Congressional Censorship in America.

Yes, Ill admit, while it is true that I might have the largest reservoir of influence and
power, it should be noted that I am not the only one out there with actual real reservoir of
power. Others, religious, economic, and creative authority figures have just as much, if
not a lot more, power than me. Its not healthy to treat me like Im the only one in the
world with a reserve of power. Im nowhere near having a monopoly on powerIts an
inaccurate representation, like most stuff in the media about me that I dont create myself.
If Im so powerful, how come I cant get good shows on TV half the time. Its all a bunch
of contrarian self-righteous garbage. Well, mostly anyway.
You know, I really did think success and power would be a bit more festive and
congratulatory than this. No ones ever happy for you when you succeed. Not for me
anyway. Cant speak for other artists.

Monday, January 23, 2012,

The Collective Videos of SplitAtomBooms Favorites section have received a total
viewership of 600 Million Views for all those videos tons of people made. Well over Half
a Billion Views. A fairly successful amount. I counted up all the videos I linked to in my
favorites section, all ones that got over 1 million hits each, and they amount to a total of
600 million views.
By now, my engineering work has influenced over 2 billion people in six continents
online. I might be an icon one day. I dont think its an overstatement to say I changed the
way more than 2 billion people watch TV shows, movies, animation, anime, clips,
trailers, music videos, and essentially any piece of motion media imaginable online.

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My INTP, Scorpio, and 22 temperaments and personalities are showing through. Im The
Designer; The Entrepreneur; The Engineer; The Creator. The Author; The Auteur. Im
the massively powerful Titan of an Architect, who likes to build things. Big things.
Things that alter the way media and business are conducted and negotiated.
But enough about me; how about all of you?

Enterprise Outlets:

Writing (Manifesto: Lulu, Twitter, Blogger, the Adult Swim forums)

Art (Parallax: Photobucket, DeviantART
Anime: (Bang Zoom! Entertainment, FUNimation, Adult Swim, DeviantART)
TV: Adult Swim, NickToons, Cartoon Network, Boomerang
Multimedia: YouTube
Internet: Google, YouTube
Comics: (Parallax: Tokyopop, Amazon, Lulu, CreateSpace, WCN)
Producer: Adult Swim, YouTube

I have an outlet for all of my polymath interests.

The African-American, or Urban market, much like the Asian market in the 80s,
regardless of production values, is considered not marketable in the eyes of studio
bigwigs, from Hip-Hop to The Boondocks. Studio Heads are afraid of trying to sell
African-American films to a world audience. Even with Barack Obama as the
Commander in Chief. The Bottom Line to all this is, White entertainment is a sure
bet in the international market. Ask George Lucas. Theres a stigma there.
And to think, all this time Ive been selling to a white audience, subconsciously,
unintentionally, without even being aware of it, or the fact that Im only part white. Im
white, Im urban, Im smart, Im cultured, Im dramatic, Im funny and Im international.
I appeal to nearly all markets. My struggle and story are not relegated to one race or
culture. Its like mythology, or Batman. Everyone relates to it pretty much.

Tuesday, January 24, 2012,

The number one online area I own, thats good for plugging stuff, is the webpage and
video for my highest rated YouTube video: Gorillaz Clint Eastwood (Music Video).
It gets high traffic numbers, so if something is on there, it can easily receive at least
crossover appeal. Gorillaz is my number 1 High Traffic area, on YouTube or anywhere
else. Advertising Gold.

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Well, Ive reached the First Big Book Watermark. Its becoming harder and harder to rip
me off. Whether its impersonation, plagiarism, parody, or scam, theyre all inevitably
and eventually doomed. Thats not a conscious effort on my part. Thats just the way it is.

Manifesto will definitely be published some day, especially now that Ive made a more
official non-YouTube debut. Manifesto might even become a bestseller, if I get big
enough and there is enough interest in me and my work. I know Cartoon Network and
Hollywood are fascinated by me. But are regular people? The masses? Or is it all hype?
Only one way to find out, I suppose.
January 24th, 2012 was the first day my book was distributed online and was in stock. No
turning back now. I wouldnt want to turn back anyway. There are things much scarier
than publication. Like Johann Liebert, The Monster, and his real life disgruntled
sociopath murder convict counterpart, Bryan, The Other Monster. But fuck him. This is
about me, not him, so forget I ever mentioned him. Unlucky and malicious traitors like
him are not worth mentioning by famous and lucky people like me. Every time I succeed,
I get tempted to rant about the things that tried to stop me from succeeding and reaching
the next level. The things that tried to stop me, but didnt succeed because A) they suck,
or B) They underestimated by resolve, tested it, and probably achieved the opposite of
what they actually WANTED To do, which would be weaken my resolve.
Seriously, why would I want to risk my $1 billion reputation just to watch taboo things
online? Im beyond that phase. Going to bad places now, with my current reputation as a
real life warrior, would be the American Bushido equivalent of killing kittens or
committing seppuku. You only go to such places when you Have Nothing To Lose. I
have a Career now. I cant afford to degrade or lower myself to the worlds level like I
used to. No amount of hypnosis or subliminal messages will get me to do otherwise. My
computers like Dads computer. I must keep myself, and my life clean. Its definitely not
like it used to be. I could do certain things before, I could afford to do certain things
before that I can never do now. No one was actually paying attention to me at that point
in my life, other than the psychotic sociopaths stalking me and trying to sell me
corruption, dishonor, hatred, misguided sex, and sin of course. Im clean, and Im not
going to let myself not be. Theres too much I can lose. If I need a reason not to go back
to shit-life, I should look at the quality of my life then, and realize how shitty it was
compared to now. A time when I was the guy the other stars shit on, on TV, but not an
actual real star, which is why no one paid attention. Eh, just focus on Zen and meditation
and transcendental Enlightenment and Ill be fine. No more of this idle garbage.

Doing ANYTHING on a stage or in a crowded area is essential impossible for me. Id

rather kill myself than entertain a crowd, because the former would happen. The latter
never would. Thats why Ive avoided the traditional publishing process, partially
because of my fear of promoting my own work. My therapist at one point acknowledge I
have social phobia, a debilitating, and awkward phobia. I have agoraphobic social phobia.
Going to movie theatres. Going to concerts or sports games. Being in a crowded room, or

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outside during the day and at night. Or in my back yard. Dating. Driving in traffic. Im
reclusive because of my fear of people. Disrespectful, rude, and obnoxious people in
general. They look like Satan Himself to me. ESPECIALLY teenagers, bullies, thugs,
and rednecks. Evil! Both heavily harassed me growing up in Casselberry. I have no desire
to go through that experience again, where my parents force me to experience it firsthand,
which felt like a form of social torture on the part of my parents and therapists, now that I
am a professional author, and Ill probably never do anything public to promote my
creative work outside of the internet. Probably ever. I dont have a problem with my adult
lifestyle at all. TV just reminds me of all the evil things I left behind, therefore TV is evil
too.
Its true. So very true. People seem to like to think of me as this big, bold, social, and
audacious bear. Far from it. Im terrified of being in the spotlight, or out in the open. Just
the thought of it is terrifying enough to make me avoid it and its creepiness, like the kind
I see on TV. People are terrifying. Whats not to understand? Ignorance is terrifying.
Hatred and Anger are also terrifying, especially if I know its being directed at me. So
many things about socializing can go horribly, horribly wrong. Disturbing behavior in
person is more/just-as terrifying to me as horror movies with blood and gore. At least
with the horror movies, you can fast forward, press pause, or stop to make the fear go
away. In real life you cant necessarily do that unless you have earplugs, which I do,
primarily because of my neighbors and brother. Their voices are scary and disturbing.
This all leads into my other fear(s), phonophobia: Fear of loud, uncontrollable, hostile,
destructive or disturbing voices and sounds in general. This is a fear most people dont
empathize with, nor do they understand the nature of it. Just like autism, no one truly
understands it other than the few people who have to directly deal with it. Wheres the
compassion for the victims of said fear? Wheres my understanding? People just dont
get it. Thats part of why I want to visit and/or move to Europe and maybe Asia, because
theyre not noisy like America and Florida are. People in these places are noisy and
annoying as fuck. I fucking HATE IT. I HATE listening to anything they and their
mouths have to shout at me or lecture me. And I hate the fact that everyone yells things at
me from outdoors, even when I have phonophobia. America is a noisy country. Noisier
than most countries, especially in the modern era, and if you dont like loud, disturbing,
and unpredictable sounds, dont move to or live in America.
Moving out of my parents house and away from Evil Florida SouthEast would be
INCREDIBLY EASY AND SIMPLE, if someone donated or gave money to me, and it
would change history for the better probably, to cleanse my life of these things if I only
had money, but because the public refuses to compensate me in any way whatsoever, Im
trapped in this house, just like house arrest or prison or something. I tried to make money
with Adsense, I tried putting donations on my blog and comic book sites for the Get out
of Florida Free Trust Fund. I even tried to get compensated for my most popular
YouTube videos, and I looked for jobs in the classifieds, but to no avail. Looks like Im
trapped in this horrible prison for the rest of my life unless my luck increases or shifts.
Its a fate worse than death: Florida. Worst yet, CENTRAL Florida. Must be divine
punishment for some past sin or something: Immobility. No one gives me a ride other

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than the Hesses either, probably because everyone kind of hates me. Thats just the
beginning of The Curse and my Bad Luck. I could go on for 10 pages about all the other
legal, ethical, human rights and media problems and slack Im getting. I could go on for
days about how bad my luck is and how poorly the world treats me and abuses me. And
intentionally so. This cruelty from others is no accident. They all do it on purpose. I love
epic rants. And if bankruptcy put me out on the street and made me homeless because no
one chose to offer help to me, I know good and well Id suffer, get hurt, attacked, and die.
Someone would probably run me over with a car or something, for all I know. I wouldnt
put it past anyone around these parts not to kill me if they had the chance, as a result of
my fame and the envy it inspires in people. Bryan already did try to frame and kill me,
and others wanted to humiliate and defame me. Everywhere I turn some psychopaths are
out to do me in, as NBC, Viacom, and the news, and all their army of minions, clearly
show through their unenviable and vastly arrogant and unethical behavior, fraudulent and
manipulative business practices, and malice towards me that they put in their
programming through malicious onslaughts of subliminal messages in a sad attempt to
manipulate the media in their own favor, leaving nothing for me whatsoever. Not a single
crumb. Theyre making millions daily. Im making the opposite of that. Its a dangerous
life I lead. I dont let on about this danger much, because the people observing me would
loser their cool and flip out. You know, let fame and so-called hypothetical
nonexistentfortune make fools out of them too.
And then theres the other side of the coin. Girls throw themselves at me in the media,
young ones, not that Im interested in that sort of thing. And every time I go to a public
site and post, and make others aware of my presence that yes it is me, JM, everywhere I
go online I get mobbed by people, dozens of them or more seeking my attention. I cant
deal with that many people mobbing me and to get my attention or response all at once.
Its sensory overload. In real life Im the biggest, most pathetic loser in the world, yet
every time Im online Im the most famous and worshipped and tracked person in the
world. I dont know how to deal with such a simultaneous contrast of positive and
negative. I dont know whos worse: The People on TV and the Web who keep trying to
portray me as the biggest star in the world (scary shit), or the People living around me
who hate and abuse me and disavow and deny any and all signs of real life success I
show (through speech and behavior and positivity) with a passion (just as scary shit).
This is getting out of hand, and by now I dont have the power to deal with such
conflicting and alarmingly overwhelmingly negative and overwhelmingly positive views
of myself. If I embrace the negative, I get torn apart by the positive. If I embrace the
positive, I get lynched by the negative. This is not a healthy way of living. And not
normal one either. I dont know what to do to deal with this problem anymore.
1. Lulu is my Testing Ground, where I experiment with manuscripts and investigate
the proof copies of my books to make sure the printed copy looks all right, is
properly formatted and without any printing errors. Im the Editor and Editor in
Chief of my own books and comic books. Self-Publishing is a thrill. But Lulu
isnt good with the actual selling part, which is where CreateSpace comes in.

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2. CreateSpace is my Proving Ground, to see if theres any demand out there.

Founded by Amazon in 2005, and still growing today, CreateSpace is the number
one way to get your book revised and put in stock at Amazon.com. Im still
waiting for my proof copy I ordered from CreateSpace, to reach me. But lets just
say CreateSpace is my official Quasi-Self-Publishing Publisher, and go with that.
With CreateSpace, you CAN get your manuscript turned into a book and in stock
on Amazon without too much compromise. CreateSpace, though it is the
subsidiary publisher owned by Amazon, gives me a surprisingly large amount of
freedom with the formatting of my manuscript. And they correct half the print
errors for you. Something Lulu doesnt really do.
3. The great thing about Lulu and CreateSpace is, regardless of any physical
characteristic, as long as you have the manuscript finished and handy, you can
publish and distribute it and have just as much of a chance of writing a bestseller
as anyone in the publishing biz.
1,500 words for today. Not bad for a newly awakened Professional Author. Livin the
Dream. Going to work.
OK, so some reviews of similar books are in. Im noticing there are some flaws and/or
not as good elements to my first book debut I should keep in mind for future volumes.
And Ill admit, half, if not all of these elements slipped my mind, partially because I
wasnt really trying to conform to how most books are done, but Im all ears.
Critics seem to be clamoring for:
Numbers to organize the pages.
Artist (thats me) comments and commentary
More female characters
More detail, less amateurish simplified art, even though my passion still shows
Comics, actual less crude sequential art that are less crude in nature

Wednesday, January 25, 2012,

Technically, I am working with a lot of managerial budgetary and staff limitations. In
other words, I have no money and am the only one producing these comics.

Thursday, January 26, 2012

There, Im currently publishing the 2nd Draft of Art: Manifested. This time its 200 pages,
instead of a whopping and over-expensive 302. The book is actually more reasonably
priced now at around $35. Its in stock at Amazon, and its probably going to get featured
in a literary magazine, depending on if I promote the book or not. Its extra effort, but

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publicity equals sales. Without publicity, there might not be any sales if its not a brand
name.
I CAN publish or distribute Parallax in a few different places, when all is said and done:
WCN, Google Sites, Photobucket, Twitter, Facebook, Lulu, CreateSpace, Graphic.ly.
And the local bookstore of my own city I live in. Or all of the above.
What can Brown do 4 u?
Games of Chance in generalthey all suck and will get you nowhere. I dont believe in
any of those things. I believe you make your own success, if you want success that
actually lasts over one lifetime, and something that isnt just given out and handed to you
through idiot luck. I believe theyre all a big rip-off. I make my own success. And I
always HAVE made my own success. Even if it takes a lifetime, I still endorse
succeeding the traditional way: By working and completing projects. Chance games
attract suckers the vast majority of the time. People who want instant success here and
now.

Am I secretive about the nature of my current success? No. I just dont talk about
it very often. Well, sometimes I like to talk about it.

Promoting a book is a lot of work. Particularly if your family isnt very encouraging or
financially supportive of your career, where they refuse to pay for anything in your
publishing business.
Anime kind of exists in this self-imposed media ghetto. Just now I realize that, anime
publicity is hardly anything resembling real publicity. Anime would sell a lot more if it
used mainstream publicity the way Miyazaki does. How big you actually get often
depends on what kind of marketing you use. Most anime publicity is really just fan word
of mouth, on internet forums, and websites, and whatnot. Fame in anime doesnt really
exist, but respect and word of mouth does.

Friday, January 27, 2012

True success makes me weep openly. I cant stop crying when my luck is at its best, and
Im at the top of my game. Success and prosperity make me so happy. All my life, all
Ive really known is failure and insecurity, and an uncertain future. Everyone was always
so hopeless, discouraging, and disappointed around me. Its a miracle that looks to be
changing in some ways.
Getting my own book could change my life. For the better probably. I might not be
prepared for the amount of success, wealth, influence, and fame, I could potentially be
dealing with in the next few years. If never got big by conforming to standards.
Conformity isnt my thing, even when it comes to formatting my work.

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Art: Manifested is definitely an American or Western project of creative proportions.

Im proud to say Im producing a product, that as far as production goes, was produced
and published in America. Im very proud of this fact. Its not imported from a foreign
country, and its not translated, and its not made in Asia. At all. How many people can
even claim that about their projects anymore? Fewer than ever. Im not a xenophobe. Im
just patriotic.
The Healer @Work
There are lizards trapped in my parents house windows. Dont know how they got there,
but I know what will happen if I leave everyone else in charge. The lizards will be forced
to sit there in a prison not of their own making, which they dont even know how they got
there, just like me, until they starve and die from starvation and/or thirst, just like my
family wants to do to me. Let me sit here and force me to do nothing until its too late
and I die of misery and being cut off and abandoned. If someone else is in charge who
isnt me, Ill rot and die, eventually. Ive GOT TO take control before everyone else lets
me starve and die of a broken heart. Thats exactly why I hate living here. People here
just let you rotand eventually die from a depleted and malnourished soul. No one
around here cares whether you succeed or fail, whether you live or die. Its sit in a
corner syndrome. Bad parenting, bad family syndrome. I liberate people. I liberate those
tiny little lizards. I set you free, and plant the seeds of freedom in your life, no matter
how small you are. We all play a part. Even lizards.

Saturday, January 28, 2012,

There have been references to the Apocalypse on TV, most of them not very good, but no
ones ever created, written, or drawn a martial arts series with Armageddon and The
Apocalypse as the series backdrop before. Thats quite original. And it most certainly is,
considering the fact that I made that part up. Its practically my trademark
Armageddon-style animated series featuring martial arts, secret agencies, gothic fantasy,
and ballistics. Who does something like that other than little old me?
The art industry is about more than just art. Its also about business. Many artists fail to
make money because they do very little to market themselves in any tangible way, other
than maybe the internet. The truth about art is, its marketable. It can be marketed just
like movies, music, celebrities, and TV shows. Just like any other product, art can be
marketed on the market.

How to Draw Comics; Questions to ask about comics (Drawing Strategy, Approach):

How do you create a comic book page (archetype, prototype)?

How do you draw and execute a comic book page?
How do you execute a comic book panel and others like it on a comic book page?
How should you approach each individual comic book panel composition?

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Should the design and draftsmanship of a comic book page be complex or simple?
Should you always reference yourself in a mirror (or a model) for all characters in
every panel?
Should your paper be 11 x 17, or smaller in size? Should you do mirror studies on
11 x 17 paper on a wooden drafting board? (like Alex Ross?)

My biggest influence in my poetically metaphorical description of my scripts and novel

manuscripts would have to be John Steinbeck. His descriptions have a certain jolt of
power to them. And a big influence on my charcoals and pencils would be Eugene
Delacroix, Alex Ross, Jhonen Vasquez, Production I.G., Syd Mead, Edward Gorey, and
David Mack. Their painting styles influence my pencil-charcoal, charcoals, and painted
acrylics. Marvel and DC actually capture detail in their art quite a bit.
Other than Star Wars, which is only a metaphor with lightsabers, and Samurai
Champloos art books, which doesnt show many action posesWhy are there no good
coffee table art books dedicated to samurai, ronin, Jedi, dual wielding, fantasy
swordsman, knights, and other honorable sword wielder and swordslingers, in various
assorted action poses. Im going to draw a portfolio, and art book collection of The
Swordslinger, using sword wielders and kenjutsu as a theme. In a way, thats what Ive
been doing with Mono, thematically for a good long while now. But I want to eventually
easy into a more generalized swordslinger and sword poses approach, kenjutsu style.
28 and still a real life virgin. Im actually a bit proud of this celibacy. Im also never
going to have kids or get married. Im kind of glad romance is absent in my life.
Actually, more like proud of it. Im kind of a Holy Man, therefore pleasures of the
flesh is a feeling Ill probably never know or explore while Im alive. If I actually could
do something disgusting like that, Id probably have already done it by now. But I cant
so I dont. Doesnt bother me and it shouldnt bother anyone else. Well, except Andrew. I
couldnt imagine having kids. It would be so horrible. Why would I want to raise kids.
Im not that unselfish that I probably could and be successful at it.
Hard things to write:

Speculative Fiction (High Fantasy and Science-Fiction)

Novels
Scripts
Action Movies
Animation
Comic Books

Moms a two-faced narcissist neat freak. Pops is a greedy gluttonous curmudgeon.

Andrews a full grown screamer brat, bully sociopathological liar with a voice that has
the decibel level of a car horn, and who seems to be losing his hearing more and more as
he gets older, which, along with the alcohol only make him louder, greedier, and angrier

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with each passing year. Whats not to love? Well, my ears when Andrew hurts them and
threatens me with demeaning physical violence, to name one thing.

Fame and the internet are definitely distracting. Fame and the internet make it hard to
write. They make it hard to get work done. Theyre over-stimulating. I should know. Im
kind of an expert on both subjects. I live both of them. I can only write so much about my
own fame without feeling depressed and self-absorbed, like Im wasting my time.
Lawrence Lessig, the famed anti-copyright lawyer, is a genius, and he inspired me a great
deal a decade ago, when the internet was first emerging, and I hadnt gotten a chance to
test the pragmatic applications of his legal theories for my own use. His theories fueled a
lot of my support and endorsement of piracy and copyright violation in the early years,
UNTIL I saw the thieves on DeviantART work their black magic and violate every
anime and manga copyright known to man, both destructively and selfishly. The theories
Lessig believes in fuels the justification of sites like YouTube and DeviantART.
YouTube actually makes a lot of sense and is quality work. DeviantART, with all its
plagiarism, and high school slander and potty mouths, not so much. Its just irresponsible
web publishing and distribution. If anything, DeviantART proves a copyright
counterpoint to Lessigs theories about copyright. I could endorse Lessigs views because
they were analytically sound at the time, and young plagiarist Asian artists didnt used to
hide behind them. Now they do. Makes me ill, to see such abuse of what used to be such
a legit theory. Almost as bad as the popularization of cute non-science-fiction anime, but
not quite. Listening to Lessigs theories and taking them to heart, instead of consulting my
attorneys was an idea that later proved itself to be an error in judgement. Not following
the rules of copyright, not being original in all your work makes you less wealthy, not
more. Believing Lessigs theories are completely justified could have been what
bankrupted me to begin with. It could be the reason Im broke: Not protecting my own
copyrights and patents, from pirates, plagiarists, copycats, doujin artists, and thieves.

Sunday, January 29, 2012,

The Harsh reality? No American manga-ka, or American manga creator, has ever sold
1 million copies or more of anything, pretty much. Ever. Manga made by Americans
doesnt really sell. I dont see why so many American artists want to draw manga and
anime. The market points out quite obviously that world manga doesnt really sell. Some
of it looks pretty good, but for the most part no one really pays it much mind. They never
have. It makes a miniscule amount of money at bookstores. Its pretty much neither
marketable nor profitable.
My publisher thinks I should promote the book. I cant really disagree. My project agent:
Maybe hes just busy with other things that are emerging in the media. I was informed
that if I go for promoting my project, theres a good chance members of the media might
call me to ask some questions about my project or me. I dont really mind that. It could
very well help me under the right circumstances. But if my agent never calls back, all that

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potential dies. Then again, maybe I dont have faith in myself. Maybe I worry too much
about my potential. Or maybe its Sunday and hes clearly not in his office during the
weekend, let alone Sunday.
I guess Im getting used to the whole professional author thing. For instance, I was
freaking out until I realized I work for no salary, on weekends, but my agent doesnt.

Should all creative success really be effortless in real life? Or should artists have to bust
their ass over numerous decades. Why does everything successful look like no real actual
work was put into it? So, what, you get ahead by not exerting force or energy, and not
working? I dont understand. I cant wrap my head around it.
Lets face it, Im addicted to the writing and drawing production process. I cant stop
myself from writing and drawing pointless things, and getting every last thought down on
paper or on a computer screen. Stream-of-Consciousness Process is a process addiction. I
hardly ever produce anything good, and yet Im very addicted to producing work in those
areas. They control my life.

Im quitting the whole Photobucket Web Gallery Photo Album thing. Im tired of that.
Why spoil and taint my art by cheapening it with web accessibility. If I have my art in a
book on the market, I dont really feel I need its long lost brother on the web. Besides,
Im turning into a Real American Manga-Ka. Im modeling myself after professional
Japanese artists in some way. Most if not all manga-ka in Japan do not have selfpublished online web photo albums or galleries of their artwork. Maybe if I take it out of
circulation online, there might be some demand there for when I actually do go pro. But
for now, its a vow of silence. And if I can take down the Weebly tutorial and the DA
portfolio site with ~Synchronos-Hellion, I will do that too. No matter what I do, I cant
make having my artwork online work for me. So Ill yank it. Ill take it offline and log
off. For once in my life.
It feels good to not be the center of the worlds discussion and so-called tabloid rumors
for once. Im just a writer. One who writes, a lot.
Monday, January 30, 2012,
The question of Will Otomo Katsuhiro ever make an appearance in the U.S.? is one
Ive asked myself quietly, and to myself on and off for over a decade, for at least 15
years. Now, on January 30th, of 2012, I got to read an article on Anime News Network
about him that answered that very question. Yes. He is. Hes visiting the United States
(finally!) to greet a lucky few at Comic-Con this year. Thats some huge anime news.
Hes been colleagues with both Moebius (whos still alive) and Osamu Tezuka (who is
deceased). If I lived in California, Id love to go there to get his autograph and his alone.
Hes my idol and hero, one of the top 3-8 artists I look up to. The others being Todd
McFarlane, Jhonen Vasquez, Hiroaki Samura, Yoshiyuki Sadamoto, Dave Sim, Akira

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Toriyama, and Paul Pope. They are the Gods of art, and what I wouldnt give to meet
them at a convention or creative studio somewhere some day.
Speaking of Pros, Finally (Finally!), another thing Ive been waiting for is happening in
the next two months (February and March). Animation Magazine is publishing the follow
up to the 20 Year Anniversary issue. The 25 Year Animation Magazine Issue is going to
be published next month, February 2012, with what Im pretty sure will be an update on
their Shows that Changed the TV Landscape, Movies that changed cinema, and the
famous Auteurs List (The Auteur one being my persona favorite).
My heart is no longer empty. Today was a big news day in the animation and comic book
world, what with Animation Magazine and Katsuhiro Otomo (my spiritual brother) being
2 stories of note.
And then theres my book I just released on Amazon a few days ago. Looking forward to
seeing how that will go, once all the proper phone calls are made and received.
The Kenjutsu Wooden Bokken Blade and Gray Trenchcoat Im going to buy will be good
reference for my sword-slinging artwork studies and portfolio of sketches and
illustrations. A large portable mirror for my room will also be necessary for using myself
as a reference subject.
Euromanga.jp is looking pretty cool. Theyre finally publishing French comics
anthologies of some of my favorite French comics, in Japan, as Manga, which is pretty
cool to think that stuff like Moebius, Enki Bilals Monster Trilogy, and Blacksad
qualifies as manga. This just proves that if your sequential art material and stories are
polished enough, theres no real limit to what you can achieve in comics publishing, and
that includes credibility in the manga world. The best way to get credibility in the
Japanese manga world is to Not Be A Fraud or Cheater or Sham, for starters. The
Japanese respect doing your own thing, honest effort, and authenticity. If youre really
putting your heart out into something and spilling your guts out without expecting an
automatic reward, the Japanese publishers and numerous artists and writers in Japan
notice things like that. How could they not. When youre Japanese nobility, you notice
other nobles and people who are pure of heart, ethically, and spiritually. Japan loves
France and France loves Japan. Euromanga is the latest potential craze, but I was into it
before it was glamorized in the Japanese publishing industry.

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Tuesday, January 31, 2012 (Midnight)

Favorite Live Action Film Studios (People who could do a Parallax Live Action)
A Band Apart
Revolutionary Pictures
Miramax
Warner Brothers Pictures
New Line Cinema
LucasFilm
Lions Gate
Twentieth Century Fox
Weta Digital
Industrial Light and Magic

Favorite Recent Discoveries

Katsuhiro Otomo Appearing in the U.S.
Katsuhiro Otomo Art Book Coming Soon
Sony Internet TV (Box for $200 that works like Roku)
French Manga-Comics / Euromanga.jp
Watchsomequids.com [adultswim.com] (Real Simulcast)
Bokken Kenjutsu Sword

Tuesday, January 31, 2012, (Afternoon)

I couldnt help but notice when things of note happen at the same time.
I published my first artbook, Art Manifested through Amazon, and promoted it in the
same year (2012) that AKIRA manga-ka, writer, and anime director Katsuhiro Otomo
published his latest Kodansha-published Japanese artbook Kaba2, 22 years after he
published his first Kaba artbook, in September of 1989, one year after his AKIRA feature
film opened in Japan to great influence, acclaim, fame, and cult success. Im honored to
be included as one of those things happening around the same time as Kaba2.

If you work as an auteur in animation, generally, the media refers to you as an

animator
If you work as an auteur in independent comic books, they generally call you a
cartoonist

2012 could very well be the year I truly make it big in this world. Perhaps the release of
my first real book, an artbook, signifies the start of my career. You never know. If I got
phone inquiries, that might be an indicator.

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I am very, very busy now. But Ive got some plans on the horizon, for future publishing
opportunities: The Manifesto Series, The book of essays, the novel, and of course,
eventually, Parallax, which Im taking my sweet time with. I have a very promising
future ahead of me in publishing and media: Really looking forward to it. Thats pretty
much all Im going to say for now.
Im a young writer, a young artist, young author, and a young entrepreneur. A self-made
success story. The vast majority of people who succeed at my age or younger end up
being performers who strike it rich. Not managers and publishers and business people.
Success in publishing, if its taken seriously, is still reserved for the old. And the mature
at heart. My success story wont change that. Im also one of the youngest men of color,
who is of multiracial and Eurasian descentor at the very least, who is a member of a
minority groupto author a book thats professionally published.
Most likely, I became an author, officially, at the age of 28, when Amazon published my
first book, an artbook featuring my artwork, design work, concept art, and illustrations,
which I had been developing and working on for 10 years straight, since at least the age
of 17 or perhaps a little later.
Next up: Facing the shining glare of the Spotlight and/or Limelight.

Wednesday, February 01, 2012,

Amazon shares are up 11% since the beginning of 2012.

Katsuhiro Otomos work is so amazing. Even just on the surface, it looks like it took an
eternity for him to draw the sum of AKIRAs parts. Every half inch of canvas space on
each page shows obvious care and painstaking detail. Hes looking at every centimeter of
each of his canvas drawings, pencils, inks, and paintings. I need to do that. Pay attention
to every centimeter of each page. Use a magnifying glass and 11 x 17 inch paper or a
large canvas if necessary. But yes, with Otomo, theres so much detail there. The entire
page is just about always filled up with form and texture and blending, hatching, and
shading, and every metric inch of it shows painstaking attention to detail.
Its always the artists who pay attention to all the details on the page: The millions of
themevery inch of it and the whole pagethat draw the best. The Moebiuses, Syd
Meads, Todd McFarlanes, Corey Jacksons, Rima Jabburs, Otomos, and Production I.G.s
of this world are the ones with all the superior artwork.

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In the artistic life, one should practice and refine his skills in the area that one is inclined
to do:
People practice the ways to which they are inclined, developing individual preferences.
Miyamoto Musashi
The Book of Five Rings
Im aiming for a certain level of realism in my screenwriting fights, gun usage, ballistics,
and fighting schools and techniques. Therefore I study many masters of combat and
fighting, both staged and real, such as the Bushido code, Miyamoto Musashi, Bruce Lee,
Jet Li, Jason Statham, Woo-Ping Yuen, Corey Yuen, Jackie Chan, and John Kreng. I also
watch and read any, all, and every fighting, martial arts, and combat manga and anime,
either seinen or shonen, that I can get my hands on. And I pester my brother to teach me
about gun parts, to learn more about firearm science, as part of my research into the
world of Action and Action Literature and Storytelling.
Naruto returns to TV March or May 15th. I forget which one.

From studying mania and energy drinks, and the power and energy they give me, Ive
come to the theory that energy is correlated with ones level of concentration, focus, and
hyper-focus. Mania = Focus. Hypomania = Hyper-Focus. High Energy Level = High
Focus Level.

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Chapter 53

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Wednesday, February 1st, 2012,

Its hard to say how a book like Art: Manifested will affect my status, or career, or any
other aspect of my professional life. Im putting serious entrepreneurial muscle behind it.
It could get seen by no one and it could be seen by everyone. I dont know how relevant
Amazon is, and I dont know how relevant traditional books are in the age of e-books and
Kindle. Also, this isnt the first high profile project Ive worked on with a lot of potential.
And its not the first time Ive been in the national spotlight. So what is it exactly? Its a
risk by some standards, but not so much of one that I feel stupid about investing time
and effort into it. This could be a make or break point for me in my life and career. I
wont know how well my book project is really doing until a year or half year from
now, when the dust finally settles and all is said and done. In a way, its the first time
Im really putting myself out there, and my parents are asking me Isnt it too soon?
Dont you think youre a little young to be doing this sort of thing Amazon sees it a bit
differently. They have as much confidence and faith in me as any other first time artist
and author. I try not to think about how scary it can be putting your work out there, raw
and unashamed. My project is the start of something new and unusual in the publishing
industry. Normally, artists debut with a series or a gallery, a comic book series, or an
animated series. Getting your own artbook, off the bat is both unheard of and
unprecedented. It is innovative. A new Brand-Establishment Format and Medium, and
untested waters. A Self-Published Sketchbook thats co-published by a popular retailer
(Amazon). A bold publishing move that could work or fail. Fortunately, Im selfpublished, so theres no rule against it. But yes, because, technically, Im an
independent author, Im giving myself this option, because I dont have an editor or
producer, a boss, telling me, No, this is a bad idea, it wont make any money, youll
never succeed or sell any, you cant do that, Ill never pay that much. In that sense, it
truly is an untested market in the art world. Starting your career with an artbook and not
finishing it with one. That is unusual. It could lead to job offers and other good things,
or it could lead to nothing.
But its still considerably less expensive and risky getting an indie artbook or
sketchbook out there off the bat than something very expensive and involving, like a
show or a comic series, the latter of which Im currently in the process of developing and
building to follow up the sketchbook artbook.
To me, I choose not to make such a high distinction between artbook and
portfolio. In a way, an artbook is a high end portfolio. Many people automatically
make a distinction and think portfolio = amateur, artbook = professional. Its really tough
to know where to draw the line with my own publishing work. Some people actually say
the major projects you work on and the studios and publishing companies you found
ARE your portfolio.
If I make a lot of money from my book, Im going to use that money to fund future
creative projects, like making Thunder-Lighting Media a real Hollywood and/or French
animation-comics studio, hiring animators, travel expenses, production supplies like
computers and desks and chairs and pencils and scanners and paint and ink and celluloid,

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and building offices and studio space locally, nationally and/or internationally. Best
places to build studios: L.A. (Titmouse, Bang Zoom, CN, LucasFilm, SLG), France
(Marathon, Sav! The World, France 3, Canal J, Moonscope, French Manga publishers).
With my own studio, and the industriousness that would bring, I could afford to fund and
produce my own book and TV and cinema projects for networks and comic book
publishers with a crew of 20 of a lot less. I could move to L.A. and France, or at the very
least, visit the studios there, to network.
Once my book is completely self-published through CreateSpace, if it succeeds
commercially, I can probably submit it to a more traditional publisher, and I can use my
publishing credentials and figures as part of the sales pitch to get my book re-published
and adopted by a regular publisher in reprint editions. Maybe. But if the original earns
anything, I can wait a few years to republish, until people forget it exists, or I can move
on to comics, like I initially planned instead of lingering with the reprint.
Artists and writers dont need to worry about conforming to the structure of the market
by worrying about vendors and distribution outlets so much. If no channels look like they
play the kind of show youre developing and you feel all alone, dont panic! Talent,
appealing projects, and good shows and books open their own opportunities. Worry
about making your project as decent and salable and high quality as possible,
whether its a graphic novel, anime, manga, co-production, animated series, novel or
film. Quality work creates its own opportunities in the industry. If it seems like theres
no openings for your propertys demographic, have faith, you never know when
new companies and divisions in traditional media distribution will open up. Maybe a
channel that never previously played any new animated shows, or animated shows in
general, wants to get into the business of animation (HBO Animation being one of the
most successful examples of this style of broadcasting opportunity (Spawn, Life and
Times of Tim). Boomerang being another one (Puppy in my Pocket). Nicktoons being yet
another (Monsuno).

I can NOT WAIT to get back to masterminding and devising some Fight Scenes and
Fight Design. Im totally just waiting to LET LOOSE!!! POW!!!!!!

The more time you spend on artwork, the more time you spend on detailing that artwork,
the better it will look. Guaranteed.

American Sci-Fi Epic(s)

For now, single-handedly drawing a sci-fi fantasy epic thats not Star Wars comics, is just
not done. Im the first one to attempt it in America. Its been done in Japan, and France
has a visual advantage in the realm of science fiction comics, a Beautiful Eye for that
sort of thing France has, with creators like Enki Bilal and Moebius. But their visual
intensity is not matched by the length of their books, which feel sort of short to me. I look

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at Blade Runner and Orbital, and I say, This is too short. I want more. I want to live in
this world forever I love it so much and travel around it exploring its assorted wonders!
Star Wars is the longest one, obviously, being 2 sets of separately intertwined Trilogies,
and the largest franchise in the world, or one of them at least. I owe George Lucas one,
for opening my eyes to artists like Genndy Tartakovsky and his Samurai Jack and Clone
Wars, and to the Enki Bilals and Moebiuses of the world. And then theres manga, books
like Akira and the works of Tezuka Osamu. Not American, but still a perfect shining and
upstanding example of what can be accomplished with Sci-Fi Epics over a longer period
of intense labor and time. Sci-Fi novels are just words, so they take less effort. Well, for
me they do. Its the comic book pages full of action and splendor that are REALLY hard
for me to do. But thats just me. Jhonen created a sci-fi TV show, but his sequential art in
quasi-sci-fi titles like I Feel Sick is GOOD, but NOT as good as his Sci-Fi show, and Im
pretty sure he already knows it. Thats because Corey did all the production design work,
well, not all of it, but a lot of it. Jhonen did do SOME, and it was his style DNA the show
was based on, but it did attract some very illustrious talents to its production. ScienceFiction, much as I love it, is not the easiest medium for an auteur, or at least, it didnt
start that way. Science fiction, if its filmmaking, is a collective medium, like anime and
Hollywood, well, also, in anime and Hollywood that is produced and built by teams,
crews, and committees. Occasionally a big name will get tossed up at the forefront of a
big project, a Jhonen Vasquez, or a Katsuhiro Otomo, or a Masamune Shirow or a Ridley
Scott, to make it look auteur friendly, but thats not really how it is. Tons of people work
on science fiction doing what is timeless, masterful, and beautiful work, and only a lucky
few get to put their names on the front of its credits in BIG LETTERS, getting what is
known in Hollywood as Top Billing. But real auteur SF, or attempts at it, always tend
to be literary, even the stuff that later gets adapted into something that is ultimately
collective, and based on a generous Team Spirit. This has led me to wonder, are the terms
SF and Auteur even compatible anywhere other than France and Japan? Or does such
a concept only exist in books, and not on TV or in a movie theatre?
If you look up superiority complex in the dictionary, youll find the name and logo of
DeviantART and Viacom right next to it. Their arrogance is indescribable. Its hard to
believe some people are really that arrogant, entitled, and think themselves so superior to
me and others, and yet they are that arrogant. Also, many contemporary anime fans have
a superiority complex. Their comments about people like me are a clear indicator of this
fact.
Then theres the sociopaths and stalker-hackers. People like my former stalker fall under
the defective category not so much of the superiority complex, but of that of the
sociopath. Ruthless individuals with no conscience who are determined to destroy the
world. Sumner Redstone and his company have a superiority complex, and are made up
of sociopathology.

Later in my career, if I become established, Im considering writing TV and comics

scripts for the Star Wars Universe. Probably in the Clone Wars Extended Universe.

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You see, writing the MOST POPULAR American SF comic would be a dream come true
for me. Id love to work for George Lucas one day. He seems to appreciate what I do.
Him and Katsuhiro Otomo and Quentin Tarantino. Quite the trio of auteurs!
To write a Star Wars script for TV and comics, I need 2 skills other than just pure writing
muscle.
1. I need to understand how the SW Universe works and functions.
2. I need to bang out some spec SW scripts.
Star Wars could at some point play an integral role of helping and advancing my career.
Heres some ways to write for Star Wars:
1. Be a famous artist and/or writer and/or producer of comics or animation / anime.
2. Learn the props, characters, concepts, and locations of the Star Wars Universe
(i.e. Obi Wan Kenobi, Luke Skywalker, Anakin Skywalker, Jabba the Hutt, Darth
Vader, The Sith, The Empire, The Republic, Lightsabers, The Force, The Dark
Side, Threepio, Droids, Death Star, Pod Racing, Ewoks, Assaj Ventriss, Darth
Maul, General Grievous) You could write a whole dictionary on all the SW
Universe terms LucasArts has come up with
3. Be a great storyteller. Bang that script out in no time! Scenes, Outlines, Suspense,
Action, Dialogue, Beginning, Middle, End, Plot Points and lead-ins. BAM!!
Script done! Oh yes, a theme and original story idea is needed as well.
In terms of my SW spec scripts, Im not really looking to introduce any original
characters into the roster or lineup. I really just want to put new twists on what already
works. Sounds like a lot of fun to me. If I can write Steve Blum unheard dialogue (which
I have), Im pretty sure I could handle SW, too.
When youre an author, a writer, a creator, Everything, Every Single Thing, that happens
to you is a potential story. Its important to just simply write the first draft of a script or
manuscript or screenplay or all three to get what it looks, feels, and reads like out in the
open. The only way youre going to make your ideas real and tangible is by writing the
first draft, right away, never just talking about it. It doesnt matter if its a sentence,
paragraph, or 10-20 pages. Write the damn thing down already. Stop slackin.
Format conformity has never really been one of my strong points. I tend to just like to let
my mind wander on paper and on screen, and look at the results later.
Finally, I have a strong premonition Ill becoming across a large sum of money somehow
in the future, numerous times before 2012 is over. My rivals and enemies worst fears
will be realized. Ill be successful, and no one can stop me, especially not the guy who
went out of his way to. From now on, Ill be doing pretty well for myself, by some
miraculous twist of fate. Its like YouTube all over again!

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None of the people living with me, my direct family, is at all on the same wavelength.
They all seem to be infuriating and annoying each other, and are unanimously infuriated
and annoyed with me. Oh well.
I cant just do what my body wants me to do all the time. Thats gotten me into enough
trouble as it is. My body is evil. Fortunately my mind is still good.
From now on, Im going to give myself physical instructions. For every action I take, I
will do it in steps, just like a mastermind conceiving a master plan.
For instance, say I want to look through my comic bins or artwork.
Step 1) Dust off the file cabinet so I dont get sick from the dust.
Step 2) Open the file cabinets
Step 3) Enjoy the comics
Step 4) Try to keep the stacks organized, or at least orderly, and not disorganized and
chaotic.
Any physical action I take in the real world, thats physical, I need to do in steps, and
take it one step at a time.
My dream of becoming a celebrity is actually turning into a reality. That and a superstar
writer and artist. I never thought Id live to see the day, when I became one of the most
famous artists around. And yet even though I still live with my parents, its turning into
the truth. The internet is a powerful thing.
I trust Amazon and CreateSpace, the co-publisher of my sketchbook. Theyre out to make
things easier on me, not harder. Bottom line, since Amazons CreateSpace is my business
co-partner(s), I trust them. I think theyll do a good job handling the rights to my first
public sketchbook. I dont theyll mess it up. If anyone isnt going to mess up your book,
its Amazon. Theyre just like Borders, Barnes & Noble, and Books-A-Million, in a way,
except theyre e-commerce, and not traditional retailers.
A brands reputation is primarily based on how it makes people feel. For example, in
terms of my brand, people tend to want to feel like theyre buying something Ive done,
thats associated primarily with me. The end product seems to be less important to some
people. People want to buy into me more than they buy into anything I do. For the most
part. Its the personal chemistry people feel involving themselves with me that really
makes many less analytical people feel good. The personal involvement element is a big
part of my brand.
Through Amazon, my new market book is available through 4 3rd Party Amazon vendors
as well as the main Amazon site.

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Greatest Professional Achievements:

I started a channel that got 400,000 views on YouTube

I wrote reviews for the TV show AnimeTV
I wrote spec dialogue for Steve Blum (David Lucas) in an audio sample
I published and distributed a self-published sketchbook through Amazon

Potential future achievements:

Comics, TV, Film, Animation, Novels, Anime, Manga
Star Wars is a good example of versatility. Star Wars is exactly the type of franchise I
want to model my own Brand after. Work in as many different media and mediums as
possible. Im good with writing, art, design, marketing, risk taking, leadership, slogans,
websites, publishing, web design, screenwriting, audio, computers, storyboarding, layout,
working with professionals, film editing, painting, pencilling, inking, talking, and
filmmaking. In other words, Im good at almost everything I need to be good at.
Gorillaz Ad Chronicle:
CHART
Began early afternoon, Sunday, February 5, 2012. / 1:00 p.m. Video Views: 404,598
5: 40 p.m/+Video Views: 404,690
8:30 / +Video Views: 404,782
200 Advert Views in 8 hours
(time passes, add 888 views to get:
Continues: Monday, February 6th, 2012 1:00 p.m. +Video Views: 405,670
Total Gorillaz Advert Views: 1,088
Continues: Tuesday, February, 2012 12:50: Video Views: 406,906
+Add: 1,236
12:50 Total Advert Views: 2,324
Eiichiro Oda of One Piece fame is kind of a lot like me. Its like hes a later life version
of myself. But day-um. Oda sure is in the news a lot. Well, when youre big, you tend to
make the news a lot, primarily in the best way possible.
My personal and private career and work ideals are very much based on the famous
American Dream of Rags-to-Riches. Theres no better way to describe me than with the
American Dream and Rags-to-Richest. My success follows that model. Any success I
achieve follows that model. I was born into nothing, but I made the best of it and created
something. Most famous writers and authors in America represent the American Dream.
The American Dream is Awesome! It makes you successful and famous!
And me? I work out of the home. And Im very happy it worked out this way.

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Okay. Things are going well. Extremely well. Im at the top. Im a published author now.
Ive achieved a tiny bit of mainstream immortality. I published a book, now its on
Amazon. Im a professional finally. I finally have a job: American Author and Artist.

There are 2 main components that make up a literary narrative, even in novels as complex
as anything written by Tom Clancy or John Steinbeck.
The two key elements of fiction writing are:
The Two Ds
Description & Dialogue
Its actually very simple, both to comprehend and to create. You need description to let
people know whats happening. And you need dialogue to describe what the characters
feel, say, do, and think.

Description takes up long, chunky paragraphs.

Dialogue takes up only a line or few, unless its a longwinded monologue.

Horoscope: Avoid overconfidence when caution is required.

Sweetened coffee? I HATE sweetened coffee now, with tons of sugar and cream in it. I
mean, in a way I love it, but I really, REALLY hate how the only thing it seems to
contribute to my life is day-long diarrhea. Its painful enough listening to Andrew whine
and scream like a pussy of a grown man in his parents house all day. Even worse with
diarrhea that lasts all day long. HATE IT!
J lives a relatively normal life, but his foster brother AA is a freakish mutant with no real
sense of normality, compassion, or respect for other people. If J can escape AA, hell get
a sense of what freedom truly feels like: Life without foster family.
Andrew and Cary are two of the main antagonists in the story of my life. If I can
overcome them, I can overcome the world.
I drew a diagrammatic style 11 x 17 size full-page sketch of my first design ever for an
alien and/or otherworldly spaceship and aircraft today. ZIM is a big inspiration. Ive
often doodled parts, bits and pieces of alien-looking technology, like my architecture, but
todays haul was one of my most extensively thought out yet. I want to design more. Im
good at this.

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Tuesday, February 07, 2012,

Having a son or daughter that lives overseas, while I live both in America and overseas
from time to timeNow that would be cool. Culturally (my kids would have a better
time culturally, living overseas. I dont want them to go through the same hardship I went
through in America, and Ill tell my kids that myself. Whenever it comes to life (being a
parent), (career and media), and death (my funeral), my mind always drifts to Europe for
some weird reason. My cultural roots can be traced back to there. Maybe this is a sign.
Maybe the gods are trying to tell me something. My brother kind of hates Europe. All the
better reason to have kids there. But if I really am going be a parent of a son or daughter
who Ive chosen to let grow up in Europe (and NOT Florida), I suppose Id better learn
the language.
To-Do List:
Complete my Anime Collection
Visit a Martial Arts Temple
Visit a Martial Arts Retreat
Visit Eurasia
Take a Transcontinental Cruise (To Visit Eurasia, because I dont fly)
Learn Martial Arts
Start an Animation Studio
Live In France
Become a Father in France
Draw Parallax in all media, just like Katsuhiro Otomo
Spend 1 month on 1 drawing
Eat Healthier (Fruits, Vegetables, Meats)
Exercise
Buy a gym

Where Im going, there is no TV. And there might not be any internet either. But who
cares about that? Better to be free, out in the wild with no TV signal, as opposed to
rotting away in Casselberry, in this horrible, horrible house with no view. I dont know
where Im going exactly. Could be far away, could be down the street. Either way, its
going to be somewhere newthat involves travel. I have a certain amount of hatred for
my own idleness, and a wanderlust I need to fulfill, or else it will be to the detriment of
all.
You cant draw a comics page arrangement all at once. As an artist, youre only able to
focus on 1 panel composition at a time, nothing more, nothing less, and make sure each
panel compositions is consistent to your individual artistic style. The task of drawing 1
comic book page, or God forbid, 20-100 pages is too big for any artist. You have to focus
on and construct each panel individually. Focus on the panel and only the panel, nothing
more. With Dialogue (speech bubble), People (characters), and Things (Props, BG), these

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are all elements of 1 panel, and if you draw 1 panel over and over again, soon enough, 1
will multiply and turn into many.
Akira, Blade Runner, Blacksad, Spawn, Star Wars, Batman, Dexters Laboratory, Ghost
in the Shell, Blade of the Immortal, Last Exile, Invader Zim, Romanticism.
All used a similar technique at certain point(s). The Character (standing or sitting)
looking over the landscape at the Alien World Horizon illustration and/or painting.
This, together with the Sword Motif are two elements I like to portray both individually
or integrated. Probably integrated. This is one of the numerous trademarks of my
individual style. Another archetype. Ive already drawn a few of them. Want to draw
more.
Generally, in terms of being a detail and density heavy cartoonist, youre going to start
off a Ub Iwerks (1940), Osamu Tezuka, Dave Sim (1977), or a Moebius (1982), before
you ever get the chance to become or reach a similar level of a Otomo or Todd
McFarlane. In other words, artists always start off simple. Styles and revolutions in art
start off simple. No matter what direction your art takes you to, and no matter what
destination you arrive at on your Artists Journey, theres no evading the necessity of
time, effort, and concentration both quality textural and highly detailed work involves.
Any hyper detailed artists will tell you that. Good art takes a hell of a lot of time to
complete. All the textures, crevices, folds, fabric wrinkles, background and lighting
effects need to be filled in. Its a consuming process, and theres really nowhere else to
take it but 1 single small panel at a time as your compositions gradually increase in size. I
can only hand out so much first hand experiential advice. Every artists process is
different. Theres no universal way to get from Point A to Point Z. Just my way. And it
works for me.
Lets talk about DJ for a moment. DJ was the kind of oh-so-wonderful neighbor who,
even from 30 to 40 feet away, if you dared laugh around him hed do such a good job
at annoying you with bad, horrible sounding, and obnoxious mimicked connotation of
your own voice laughing, you couldnt not think of strangling or unloading a firearm on
him. We managed somehow though. DJ would repeat this behavior, at the exact same
time, every night when he got drunk on a regular basis, from 6 to 12:30 p.m. Whenever
dusk hit was right around the time he was sitting out on his front driveway, with a beer in
hand, confident no one would call bullshit on him, ever. And no one ever did. Except Joe.
Joe called bullshit on DJ and his contemptible un-neighborly and antisocial behavior
quite a few times. But no one in Joes family ever listened to Joe when he commented on
DJ. They ignored DJs voice and pretended he wasnt even there. DJ was almost as drunk
mean, evil, homophobic, and disorderly when he drank as Andrew was. Not quite though.

Drawing Style: I really need to draw like an American cartoonist. Not an Eastern
Japanese Manga-Ka. Sure, like just about all modern and young artists, Im influenced by
the Japanaese. But Im not planning on becoming Japanese. My style is my style. I

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shouldnt be drawing to appease otaku. Frank Miller didnt. And neither did Bruce Timm,
Jhonen, or Todd McFarlane. I need to explore the themes that come naturally to me, that
Im naturally suited for. I mean, really, why make the work more difficult on myself than
it needs to be. The Natural Style is the Best Style. And my style is not 100% Otaku
Friendly. I used to say that, but that was probably a lie. It was a gimmick I used to use.
Now I just draw in whatever style, vision, and mode Im most comfortable in. And that
style is increasing in proportional-accuracy and detail-density. 1-Panel is the key to
comics. Each panel needs to tell a story. I got so caught up in McClouds Rendition in
Understanding Comics of Sequential Art and Storytelling across thousands of pages,
I lost sight of what was important. Cartooning 1 panel at a time. Dont bother drawing a
book unless you can nail that first panel, on a 1 on 1 individual basis, then do the whole
thing over next week. This involves illustration. Its important to be a good illustrator too.

Favorite writers:
William Shakespeare
Jean-Paul Sartre
John Steinbeck
Quentin Tarantino
Brian Michael Bendis
Aaron McGruder
George Lucas
Genndy Tartakovsky
John Woo
The Wachowski Brothers
Shaw Studio
Masamune Shirow
Stephen King
Tom Clancy
Homer
Dante
John Milton
Michael Moorcock
Robert E. Howard
Dave Eggers
Kevin Smith
Edward Gorey
Tim Burton
Philip K. Dick
Chuck Palahniuk
Dave Sim
Ken Wilber
Jack Kerouac
T.S. Eliot
Orson Scott Card

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(cont.)
William Gibson
Seth MacFarlane
Jhonen Vasquez
Paul Dini
Frank Miller
Osamu Tezuka
Bruce Timm
Jerry Seinfeld (influence on Manifesto)
Katsuhiro Otomo

Wednesday, February 08, 2012

Picture Book
Artist Book
Artbook
Concept Art Book
Illustration Book
Comic Book
Design Book
Sketchbook

Art: Manifested is all these things, and more.

Im going to use an online stop watch to time my drawing sessions. Ill set the stop
watch, begin drawing, then when Im done drawing, pause the stop watch and see how
many minutes and hours I was drawing for.
In the world of marketing, for books, comics, animation, TV, and film, its really not, or
has it ever really been about telling random people Ive got something to sell. In
marketing, it isnt about selling, whether direct or indirect.
Since were now all powerful and famous, lets give all our money away to charity!
Yeah!
Any advice for making it big in our modern era, Joe?
Uh, yeah, just one piece. Dont jerk off or take a crap. Like, EVER. Ha ha. Its food for
your enemies to chew on in the name of ruining your good name and reputation. Most
bodily functions people dont want to admit exist are that. Is this really supposed to
actually surprise and offend people? Random viewers of TV? Gee. I wonder.

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Yesterday, I got a sense of the future of my career. And it looks exciting, thrilling,
rewarding, and promising. Way past what I expected, in both achievement and talent.
This new level of success is going to change my life, more than likely.
Im sort of part of a special, elite group now. It feels nice. I had a dream about it, where I
belonged to a school club with a roomful of other geeks, maybe 2-7.
There are around 1 million books or so available on Amazon.com. My book is 1 out of
1,000,000.
BOOKMARK

There are a whole freaking lot of Science-Fiction and Fantasy Archetypes, both new and
old, floating around in my head. Many of my ideas are just upgraded versions of older,
more classic Science-Fantasy, SF, and Fantasy stories written in the heyday of
speculative fiction, some odd decades ago. How they got into my head, I dont know, as
Ive never heard of a great many of these classics until just now. I guess I have a
naturally mythological and archetypal mind. Thats pretty cool.

To perform at 100% optimal efficiency, I need to feel like I have control and power in my
place of work, or workplace, with good feng shui. The success of my projects depends
entirely on my emotional state. That is why it is very important to stay out of the path of
emotional leaches, emotional parasites, and emotional vampires.
If Im working on a project, and I get stressed from conflict or bad vibes in my direct
surroundings, my work is gonna suck. All the better reason to start a new life someplace
new. But thats for a later time. My NF half affects my productivity and the quality of my
work. My feelings do that. If my feelings get hurt, thats no different than pressuring me
to screw up in my workplace and on my project.
Im thinking of finally getting to let myself call my birth mother and inform her about my
accomplishment. Shed be so proud of me if she knew how well Im doing for myself in
the book, art, and publishing world. Im sure Ill eventually tell her. I also want to finally
ask her the story of her life, and what color her hair is, as I dont really know what she
looks like. I have a rough idea, but we all know how inaccurate the so-called likeness of
media portrayal is. Its always off somewhat, and by quite a bit I might add. It proves
nothing about what my mother really looks like.
I think France would be a great place for a child to grow up and be raised. He wouldnt
grow up in what no seems like anywhere near the cultural isolation and loneliness I had
to suffer growing up. But ultimately, he or she, my son or daughter would grow up
having a better life than I did growing up on numerous levels. My son would make me so
proud! If that did happen, Id have created a child who from birth would grow into being

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a citizen of the world. Id probably have an open adoption, to make sure he was raised in
a healthy environment. And I love France, so Id come to visit maybe one day, or at the
very least, visit the country itself to make sure I love it there like I did Ft. Lauderdale. If
he or she lived in America, I shudder to think what images the media might try to cram
down his or her poor little throat, what with powerful media tycoons undying hatred and
attempted corruption of me and my life in America. I would never let my kids witness
such horrors I had to go to, to get to where I am today, and where Ill be tomorrow. Id
rather let a healthy couple of parents raise my child in a country God has already blessed
with prosperity and cultural tolerance, than the wasteland Ive grown up knowing in my
adolescence. I never want members of my family go through that, even if I have to cross
the Atlantic and not look back to do that.
To colonize other nearby planets in space, well need to first make a planetary habitat that
is hospitable to life. We need to plant seeds of growth into the soil, and fill the air with
certain alchemic chemicals that can eventually help a planet like mars create and sustain
clean water and bodies of water, and dirt and sand and rock and grass and oxygen. Once
the seed of life and evolution and planetary sustainability, we can then colonize a planet
like Mars. But we must take into account gravity, oxygen, air, water, bodies of water, and
soil. If we can create these elements by planting them ahead of time, and watch them
grow, like a tree (planetary self-stabilizing planetary atmosphere with land and weather.
Who knows how far into space we could go. Once we stabilize and populate Mars, well
probably try to move on to conquering the rest of the universe, with a journey that simply
goes deeper and deeper into the cosmos. Maybe Gundam isnt such a lie after all, what
with space-colony-themed giant mecha robot anime.
Thanks to Google Chrome, hackers and crackers (or malicious hackers) are no longer a
threat to my computers, and creative projects and operation. Google Chrome protects you
from viruses just like the Macintosh does, and therefore hackers and spies attacks on my
systems is, for the most part, nullified and harmless. That is one kick-ass internet defense
system Ive got running with Google. Google, YouTube, and Amazon are three of the
safest hangout destinations online, along with some of the most popular. Stalkers are no
match for them, and thank the gods for that.
Hackers, spies, moles, and their assorted kinds of malware and viruses will no longer
factor into this equation. Its amazing knowing Im no able to put a stop to their
backstabbing ways and limit their reach. The sooner they get buried, the sooner I can
move on to focusing on my projects with few or no distractions.
Goodbye Orwells Big Brother. Rot in pieces!
Big Brother Viacom, Adult Swim, MTV, Comedy Central, and Nickelodeon, Mainstream
Malware Attacks Assisting the Suicidal Virus-Malware Madness
R.I.P.
20022012
Rot in pieces, Spies.

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Now its all about the birth of the Google Chrome and Employment Era. My favorite Era.
There. Finally things can get back to normal. Things are well on their way to returning to
the peace and prosperity that got disrupted by the media. Im glad its over. Thank god
for Chrome.

My emotions are tied to my output. My emotions control the volume of my output. If Im

excited, happy, or angry, I will tend to write a lot, even if its just one long rant. Some of
my longest paragraphs are rants, which attest to the power of ranting.
If Im in a good mood, I get a lot of work done. If my emotions are positive, then that
means I have incentive to continue. Positive emotions and energy means I get a lot of
work done. Im very productive if the atmosphere is nice during the day, morning, or
night. Meaning Andrews not here.
The quality and artistic level of my sketchbook pages is a healthy indicator, gauge, and
manifestation of my mood, as measured by the quality of my art and sketches on paper. If
Im drawing a masterpiece, I feel like a King at the moment, and the art only increases
that. If the art turns into shit, I feel like just that.
Just because THEYRE at the top and your not doesnt mean one day they wont ever
come around trying to come at you, swoop in and lay claim to your hard won
successbecause they will. Theyll try to take your achievements from you, and they
wont bother to compensate you or credit you for the success theyre attempting to steal,
vandalize, encroach upon, and shoplift from you, either.

Easy access to weapons? Not quite as fun as I would have imagined. Kind of boring
actually. I guess I always assumed Id be a bit more into ballistics in real life if I ever
came across them. But my brothers a gun fanatic. Kind of ruins it for me. Still, he gives
me plenty of stories to write about, so Im grateful to him for that. Hes my Life Bank.
My Experience Points. I go to him for REAL life and real experience. He never lets me
down. Hes a bit on the wild side, but you know, hes really not that bad, other than when
he gets in arguments with Dad.
My brother is definitely a bit on the militant side. And for a while now Ive felt it
necessary to capture this picturesque aspect of him as the militant muse of my work.
Its a masculine muse. Not meant to be used, written about, or drawn in pictures by girls
or sissies. Theres absolutely nothing feminine or female about my brothers militant
aspects. Mine neither.

I cannot tell a lie to otaku. Anime on regular and cable TV is Doomed, Doomed, and
Doomed some more. But theres always room for original American series of a dramatic

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nature, so best of luck creating your own. Youll need it. Its a harsh industry, and not a
very forgiving one either.
The density of my work is sure to put me into the history books. Im inventing my own
category of prolificacy. Im one of the most prolific writer-artists and creator-storytellers
in history. Nobody else can even get near or touch me in that regard.
To me, I value all creativity equally, even if I am more comfortable as a writer and author
than as an artist. To me, creativity is defined by the following: Pictures, words, stories,
film, distribution, broadcast, and narrative. Im half tempted to title my next creative
project Pictures and Words and proceed to throw in a mixture of writing and artwork.
Eh, Im definitely a risk taker. Not at all ashamed of this fact. Im actually quite proud of
it. Im more than happy to make Carl pissed at me. Screw im. He feels the same way
about me. Oh well. Tell it to someone who cares about your problems, pops. Life isnt
fair. Get over it already. Whining like a bitch doesnt really do my father or mother any
good. Ive been through many setbacks, probably more than them, and you dont see me
holding a grudge, and sulking in bitter hostility all day and night. Ah, the lives of mortals.
I walked up to Dad. You know, I value words and pictures. I think Im going to feature
words as prominently in my next art book almost as much as my art. I think it would be a
nice change of pace. I said.
Screw off, asshole! Youre not my son anymore! You ruined my life! he yelled in my
ear.
Nevermind.

As long as Im in a good mood, Im productive. Rum, cigarettes, Red Bulls, and 5-Hour
Energy helps me maintain my composure too.
I think cigarettes are deepening the sound of my voice. Im turning into a rather manly
man. I live the code of machismo and masculinity. The Man Code. Im a writer. Im 28
year old. I have a low, deep voice. I have a militant side. And I have a beard and my hair
is starting to show the first hints of young adulthood gray. What kind of man am I? Im a
manly man.
I like to watch the TV shows no one else is watching, or at least the ones it seems like no
else is watching.
I think were all forgetting the real truth of the matter here: That TV is a stupid invention
for stupid, stupid, VERY stupid people with no lives and too much time on their hands.
Yes, technically Adult Swim and CN too. Theyre the stupidest of all. MF Stupider.
In my art, I prefer not to go the safe route. I dont want the route that leads to guaranteed
success. I want to take chances, and risks. I dont want every drawing to have the same

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design patterns. Raynart Tradnors artbook is pretty, but she uses the same design
patterns every drawing. Thats essentially nothing more than sticking with what works
and sticking to what youre good at. To me, thats just a little too boring. I dont want to
be a safe, reliable artist. I want to be a risk taker and rule breaker. I think Im off to
a nice start. My fiction writing is pretty damn cool: Very entertaining. And I dont just
say that because Im drunk. Its great fiction writing. I just never bothered to read it all. It
felt like more work to read it than it did to write it.

There are 2 main books Im studying quite heavily and intensely on my Quest to Become
a Master Graphic Narrative Storyteller. One French, and One Canadian. My first, and
most important Source of Inspiration is a thin 30-page issue of a French comic series
called Orbital. My second is a bit more famous, Cerebus by Dave Sim. I want to do a
Book with the Visual and Aesthetic Power of certain pages in Orbital, but I also want to
make a manuscript thats dense and long, like Cerebus. The key word here is Density.
Just something, very Dense on all levels. Like Akira in some ways, only different. Me
being the Visionary Auteur that I am, I have a pretty specific vision in my head about
how I want this Visual Novel and Narrative to feel and look. Very dense architecture with
lots of textures and details, and odd geometic shapes. The very book Jhonen Vasquez
himself would draw, if only he could. Its a SF novel. Codename: Parallax, other
Codename: End Times. The architecture will play a key role as one of the characters in
my stories, albeit, a mute one that never speaks, as it never has a mouth to say anything.
Im going for a mosaic production design here. Something that gets as dense as possible.
Im sure people would eventually compare it to manga, Moebius, and anime if I
succeeded at liberating my Vision on the page. Ive shown hints of the ability to draw a
book like this in the past. I just need to tap into that. Some key props: SF architecture,
overcoats, guns, and swords. In other words, its what Ive wanted The Mono Jubei
Mythos to look and feel like all along, but before I had Orbital for reference, I didnt have
anything to weight my grandiose vision down with.
There are really only two actual rules Im playing by here.

Make the story long (because most good SF comics arent long)
Make it science-fantasy mythology with a lot of architecture-action (because most
fantasy mythos dont have enough action)
1. Blade of the Immortal is the basis of my panel-to-panel foreground-blank
(with characters in foreground) to background-perspective. And Camera
Shots & Angles
2. Orbital is the basis of my costume design and architecture
3. Cerebus (Any Volume) is the basis of my camera shots and pacing.

Ill be borrowing from these three books, and copying many elements from them quite
heavily.

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My genre is low-budget high production value SF Fantasy comics. Like what Corey
Senderov Jackson does, but with comic book series.
Im paving the way for many future American science fiction fantasy comic book artists
who want to write & draw science fiction fantasy and/or post-apocalyptic sciencefantasy. The only titles that already explore anything close to this pioneer territory are a
movie and a Japanese manga: Star Wars and Akira of course. I have little doubt that if
this book succeeds, it could get adapted into a movie or a TV show. I would not attend
the premiere of the movie if it was an adaptation.
Alcohol is my revision talent juice. I can actually read what Ive written and reviewed
what Ive drawn when I drink. Beer Goggles make it easier to work!
Rationals arent like Artisans when it comes to learning to draw, and practicing drawing.
For Artisans, art comes from effortless practice. For NT Rational INTPs, when we draw,
talent and skill come very slowly, after many hours, days, weeks, months, and years of
slow, painful, and labored practice. Learning drawing for NT Rationals is a slow and
painfully effortful process, but nonetheless well worth it. The Rational vs. the Artisan is a
situation similar to the Tortoise and the Hare.
I cant draw or read unless Im completely hammered and drunk as hell. All the hard
work is reserved for when Im under the influence. Alcohol gives me the courage to fail
and keep trying without worrying about public opinion. Alcohol allows me to turn off the
TV
Alcohol makes it easier to read, draw, and quit TV cold turkey. Been productive.
There are 2 types of ways to manifest comics, two visual-linguistic storytelling
techniques:
1. Writing to art. Writing first. Art after the fact (what Ive been using so far)
2. Art interpreted and defined by writing. Art First. Writing after the fact
2, for me, work is the best and is the most effective.

Strategy Journal,
Methods for Writing Scripts:
1.
2.
3.
4.
5.

Acquire screenwriting formatting software

Acquire a word processor
Take a year to generate ideas and let them fester
Develop ideas by writing details in notebook
Write Outlines and Draw Flowcharts on Computer and Paper

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6. Write Prose using 2 Ds. Description and Dialogue

7. Do not necessarily always write the beginning, middle, and end in the order they
appear
8. Revise and Rewrite until Final Draft is Drafted
9. Contact Agencies
10. Write Query Letter summarizing and selling script
11. Sell script

Strategy Journal,
Drawing Comics (Panels, 1-Pagers)
1.
2.
3.
4.
5.
6.

Drink a lot of alcohol. Or sober up, then draw.

Pick out classic comic book issue from collection
Take out sketchbook paper or 11 x 17 paper and pencil/blue pencil/pen
Draw thumbnails
Copy original design and illustration, line per line
Fill up entire panel with background, speech balloon, characters, perspective,
props
7. Replace each character with my own design (Mono mostly, Multiple Monos)
8. Erase unwanted lines, and cleanup with pencil or pen
9. Move onto next panel, and repeat this process with each panel until page is done.
10. Scan paper on 11 x 17 size scanner

I have one serious case of an artistic superiority complex to most other American creators
in animation. For instance, no matter what time you turn the TV on during the day or
night, youre likely to find a show drawn by artists who arent even 1/10th as good as me
draftsmanship and design wise. The most famous cartoons also many of the most crudely
drawn. Anime is the exception. And comics are actually pretty detailed if youre reading
the right ones. With comics, I fit in a little bit better.
Monday, February 13, 2012,
Comics Manuscript (which includes Comics Anthology and Randomosity), which
collects all my sloppy comics pages, and some cleaner ones is around 100 pages long.
And my recent comic book pages Ive drawn around February and March of 2012 (which
are primarily drawn on 11 x 17) amounts to around 40 pages.
So Ive drawn 140+ comic book pages in the last 3-5 years. Pretty good. Most of them
suck, but there are starting to be good ones showing up there in my stack. Im starting to
draw a lot bigger, on a larger scale. My pages are also starting to become more textural
and more like my smaller pages

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So essentially, now I actually have a graphic novel of bad art that doesnt really tell much
of a story at all. Ill have to work on that.
Jhonen cant do what Otomo and Todd McFarlane do. And Otomo and Todd McFarlane
cant do what Jhonen does. They each have their own style, but they could never do one
anothers styles successfully.
I wonder what will happen if I continue to draw 11 x 17 size pages of comic books, for
the next 4-5 years until I turn 32, where I continue to copy the proportions and design
elements of the comic books I love like Cerebus and Blade of the Immortal and Spawn.
That would be until the year 2017. That would be awesome. I might have a whole book
of new sloppy bad art by then! God only knows how much more the world will ruin itself
by then. Not my problem. Not as far as I can tell. It wont be that bad. Maybe Ill have a
successful job by then.

I drew one of my most DETAILED panels today. A martial arts kicking panel, with
Mono. Not bad. It was based on an older panel, which was a thumbnail that was a lot
more simple than the recent version I drew of it today. Which awoke me to a new insight.
My drawings often turn out better if I draw them 2 to 3 times, even on an 11 x 17 panel.
Never assume youll be able to make a living drawing comics. But rather, simply assume
youll be able to produce 1 page or panel of comics, just without thinking, even when
youre drunk. Then put the page you drew on the table face down so it looks like youre
surrounded by a blank page, and move onto the next panel/page.
Drafting HistoryThe Labor, Work, Effort, Energy, Energy, Discipline, Strain, Training,
and Practice that go into each individual finalized piece or artwork element that goes into
a finished comic book page the publisher and public sees. Before you can draw a
published tree or sword, you have to draw a few hundred or thousand initial attempts to
perfect the craft and aesthetic of that tree or sword, in your sketchbooks
Nothing appears in comics by practice. Each individual element of a comic book panels
composition has to have been practiced over and over many times over before the artists
considered it audience worthy. We do not see the many failed attempts because the artist
has made the aesthetic choice not to show the failures and revisions to us.
Every prop, every costume, and every character has a Drafting and Revision History, as
explained above.

My Form@ experiment to become more productive and polish and develop work done
in the right format, or Form@, is working!

Ive Written Fiction (long and short)

Ive Written Formatted Scripts

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Ive Drawn Production Design

Ive Drawn 11 x 17 Comic Book Pages, in Context (for the first time!)

The only things Im really missing are storyboards and character model sheets.

In other words, I AM doing the work. I AM Working on formatted Parallax and Mono
Work. And I AM inching closer to the genuine completion and polish of my projects and
career. It took a lot of insecurity, a lot of fretting, and a lot of willpower, but I did it. At
first I did a lot of procrastination, but then, right around 2011 and 2012, I got serious and
actually started working pretty hard. Now my drawing is turning into Manifesto for all I
know.
Jobs I seem to be creeping toward:

Cartoonist Comic Book Artist Penciller

TV Animation Screenwriter
Novelist
Comic Book Creator

As yet Unproven:

Storyboard Artist
Art Director
Executive Producer
Animation Creator
Hollywood Screenwriter

In some ways, I am to the arts what Barack Obama is to politics, what Bruce Lee was to
martial arts and cinema, and what MLK was to Civil Rights.
To put it another way, my battle for success, is not just a cultural one, but a racially
powered one as well, against racism, discrimination, and stereotypes. I have the courage
and audacity to not be white and still pursue the raw American Dream. Ive
downplayed the role of race and racism in my struggle for far too long. Now that Im a
man, I can admit that yes, I HAVE been discriminated against, and yes, Men of colorto
say nothing of multiracial menhave a difficult time succeeding and finding work in
literature, science, technology, media, film, animation, and the arts. Just because my
racial identity is not entirely definedand may never be by historians or biographers due
to the complications of my family tree and the closed adoptiondoesnt mean I cant
speculate and speak out for myself. White, Asian, Black, Arab, British, French, and
American: I am a mixture of all of these things. And one day I might just be recognized
as such, if the world ever accepts me as a real person. The Civil Rights Movement and
the struggle for Equality does not belong to just one race. It belongs to any race that
wants to live in a better Nation and World, and a better World Nation. African-Americans
are often disrespected in the true international community, and yet they have a very
strong sense of culture and community in the United States and Africa. Then theres the

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stereotypes black men dont bathe, they smell bad, and theyre lazy and uneducated,
unmotivated to learn or have autonomy. All stereotypes in white culture about blacks in
particular.
When I spoke to my birth mother on the phone, as odd as this sounds, I dont think shes
even that aware of the name of my real birth father. At one point, she said his name was
Glendis Ralph Sorrell, which was verified by the second account of my caseworker. But
at another point, Mary Ann actually claimed my birth father was Thomas Merton, the
famous Catholic monk, which is the profession she also said Glenis Sorrell had. In some
ways I just assume shes mentally confused from old age. Thomas Merton isnt my
father. He died 1968, 25 entire years before I was born.
Ive chosen not to be identified by my skin color or ethnic heritage, but instead have
chosen to be identified by my accomplishments, career, ideas, and life story. If this goal
requires me to conceal my racial identity to some degree so it wont divert attention from
my career. I dont know whether having a racial category and identity would bring my
family closer to me, or drive them away, or just plain alienate them. But Im scared of
how they might treat me. They treat me bad enough for being psychologically, creatively,
and intellectually different. Theyd probably treat me even more poorly if the world
treated me as ethnically superior or different, instead of just another member of the
family, which is how they have treated me for the most part.

Some of the roadblocks and hurdles Ive had to overcome: Race and Ethnicity, Age,
Geographic Displacement, Financial and Economic, Mental, Physical, Psychological,
Safety, Poverty, Hostility, Rejection. Ive had to overcome all of these things to get to
where I am today, and to get to where I will be tomorrow. Doesnt really bother me
though. Theyre just obstacles, nothing more. They can be overcome. These are not the
things that define me. Its my body of work, and my philosophy and ideas that define
who I am. Not the setbacks I have to Vanquish, Slay, and Surpass.
Seth MacFarlane: Hey, Joe. Ya ever thought of bein annoyin? Fer a livin?
JM: No. Not really. Your show annoys the shit out of me. Cant say Id ever want to be
likethat. Why would I ever want to be YOUR level of annoying? What would I have to
gain by being THAT annoying? Nothing. Thats what.

According to the Year of the Water Dragon in Chinese Astrology, because my breakout
career year is 2012, the Year of the Dragon, it will be guided by Wealth, Virtue,
Harmony, and Longevity
Longevity
For one example, my work could reach Isaac Asimov, Dave Sim, Otomo, or Tezuka
level-length historically, and be one of or The Longest Running Project/s of its kind in
History. Or it could be long running financial success. Where I start collecting big checks
in the mail, and never actually stop even after I die. Who knows?

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Being the manager of a book project team is very, very cool. I like being in charge. I
dont really give too many orders. But nonetheless I am the boss of my business team.
My family doesnt ever listen to me, but thats fine with me. As long as Im in charge of
a project team, theyll listen to me.

As a manager, my job is only partially hands on. I dont supervise the people I work with.
Thats another persons job. I approve things involving my project team and their work
involving my project.

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Chapter 54
(XP)

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Tuesday, February 14, 2012,

This year (2012) could be the beginning or first year of the rest of my life.
Drawing comics, screenwriting, and writing novels is hard as hell. Its the most difficult
thing in the world to do. Its only easy if youre making something thats disposable.
Thats easy. Making something that will be remembered. Difficult as all hell. That will be
a torturous time of your life, and dont let anyone tell you any differently.
Id be more willing to share, if I knew how to do what Im doing for certain. But certainty
is not a luxury that finds its way to me. This is whole new unexplored portal to a whole
other world of some kind. I dont know whether to celebrate or lay low. Theres no
telling how society is reacting to someone like me. I get that a lot: You confuse me.
Well said, Seth. Indeed I do. I know there have been a few storms around my house, but
Ive learned to anticipate such chaos as a natural part of growth and spiritual evolution.
Youll encounter a few local storms.

Friday, February 17, 2012,

So finally my book of art is out there, available for anyone to attain and own. I do like me
some business. But really, like CreateSpace said, this is really only the beginning of the
marketing strategy and campaign. I have yet to receive my books digital Visibility
Report I think Amazon and Google go pretty well together. Not sure if I miss WCN. Who
knows, I might return there one day. Or Ill hire a web design business to organize my
website, once the visibility of my portfolio grows. Marketing and PR are fun! I love
marketing and PR.
One of my relatives is going to buy a copy of my book. So at least I can sell it to friends
and family, even if it doesnt sell, some people close to me will buy my book from me or
Amazon.

Saturday, February 18, 2012,

I need some good sex, so one at a time, lovely ladies. The most attractive groupies get a
free copy of my book. Nice!
4 days until my Visibility Report is activated on my webpage, on the 22nd of February,
2012. I forget what day that is. Still, pretty exciting to be going through this experience.
Im not exactly sexually repressed, like some guys on the internet are. Nerds.

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Hobbies:

Video Editing
Watching Roku
Video Ripping
Editing AMVs
YouTube
Eating
Watching TV
ASMB
Tweeting
Window Shopping
Spending Money
Writing poetry, scripts, and essays
Journaling
Researching
Engineering
Sketching
Exercising

What are my goals for tonight?

Watch TV
Lie down in bed
Relax
Sell my first copy of my book
Save up for Pinnacle Editing software to make AMVs with

Sunday, February 19, 2012,

Ive wanted to sell a TV anime for the last 10 years, since 2002.
Ive wanted to sell an animated series for the last 20 years, since 1992.
Now, because of how bad TVs gotten, the American TV dream is dead.
I have the publishing industry. And books, and comics. And screenwriting.
My work is very detailed lately. So at least I can draw detailed comics and comic book
artwork.

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New Years Resolution

Draw numerous 11 x 17 comic book pages

Spend at least 30 minutes - 1 hour or more on 1 drawing
Fill up an entire page with compositions in my more detailed artwork. No white
space

Business idea: AMV Distribution Model

AMV on DVD
AMV Producer Business Card
AMV DVD as free gift for friends
Shipping Website for Free AMV DVD
Websites: YouTube, eBay, ioffer.com, Lulu, Indie Website

Sunday, February 19, 2012

I received my first book royalty payment today for a creative work. My aunt bought a
copy of Art: Manifested. Nothing wrong with that. Dad ordered it for her from his
Amazon account, and the result was a digital royalty payment of $7 total, which I havent
received in cash form yet, but will. Ahhh. You always remember your first time.
Whats better than money for nothing? I didnt really even have to work for that $7.
Thats the first time I didnt have to work on the spot for money outside of government
checks, but those are easier to get than royalty payments for a book. Thats right kids. If
you work hard and believe in yourself and expect to win, you too can earn $7 in royalty
payments for nothing: all the better reason to keep drawing and never give up, even if
you dont make any money for the most part for almost 3 decades! Theres still hope,
even when you dont do anything for 3 decades, like me. It all works out in the end. Well,
for me it does.
The TRUTH about Google and Amazon? Amazon pays so-called low rankers more.
With Amazon, you actually make a little money. With Adsense, its mostly just an
internet rip-off. Makes me glad I dont check my adsense account anymore. Id cancel
my Adsense account if I could.
Marketing Power:
Ovation, CN, [adult swim], Google Adsense, Lnks.co, Facebook, YouTube, Twitter, TV
Commercials, Website, Amazon, CreateSpace, Lulu, ICV2, Animation Magazine, Anime
News Network, Google, Gmail.

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Damn, I miss the days when companies and people actually bothering to talk to one
another, directly, was the norm. Not all this tweeting, IM, email, message board, and TV
crap. Why does technology have to deprive us of DIRECT communication? Whatever
happened to walking up to someone in a store or on the street, and talking to them?
Nothing in mass media communications is direct anymore. Just thought crimes and
thought justice, and obviously thats for sissies and no good. Im a jovial guy. I like to
talk, as long as the conversation is pleasant. But all this network 2.0 communications
shit is really annoying me in the fact that everyone avoids direct contact lately, and
avoids directly talking and conversing with one another. When did people become such
cowards? Even the White House Staff pretty much never talks to eachother directly
anymore. Instead of walking down a hall, opening a door, and talking to someone at their
desk, they IM and email each other. They dont actually talk directly to each other. And
these are the people running the country! Scary.
But the thing is. When I decided to go into showbusiness and publishing, I thought
communication would be less scary and more direct, but instead its turning into Japan,
and I and many others get ignored in favor of the higher ups feeding the machine with
indirect communication. Apparently 500,000 people who have heard of me and know
good and well who I am and what my name is, would rather just make up names that
resemble and sound somewhat similar to mine, and make up characters to fit those
names, as opposed to, you know, talking to me or emailing me directly. They seem to be
scared of direct communication.
Honest, healthy living is for suckers. The only reason I chose to be a writer and artist and
filmmaker was so I wouldnt HAVE TO work, so I could be a lazy fucking douchebag
slob, just like everyone else in L.A. And to a degree, Ive succeeded. I DONT actually
work for my money. I get it from charitable parents for the most part. Technically, I
DONT have to work or get a job in a traditional sense to support myself. We so-called
mentally ill people dont have to work. Not according to my shrinks and the social
security office anyway. They call me crazy, psychotic even, then hand me the donation
check for being crazy, which I then use to pursue my hobbies, which will probably
eventually pay royalties. Actually, theyre already starting to, even if its just from my
dad buying a copy for a relative who supports me. But hey, I can think domestically. If all
my royalty money ends up coming from friends and family, and temporarily, Im fine
with that. No skin off my back. Its money for nothing.
Tuesday, February 21, 2012,
A&E is interested in my book. I was notified by one of their editors. Pretty awesome.
Thats the first time someone from the media has contacted me about my work.
Achievement: Real AchievementNot for suckersor quittersQuite the opposite. To
attain Real Achievement, takes a lot of labor. AchievementReal Achievement is
Painful and Torturous most of the time.

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List of Achievements:

Mono
Webcomics Nation
YouTube Channel
AnimeTV
Steve Blum Read Through
Twitter Account-Feed
Facebook Account-Wallpaper

Book Publicity and News:

Art: Manifested
Art book published and distributed
CreateSpace
Amazon
Amazon Author Section
Googleshare
Good Press: PR News Channel, Boston Globe, CBS, Daily Herald, ABC, Fox,
Local Markets: Chicago, Boston, Dallas, Denver, Washington D.C.
Bookstores: Amazon, Barnes & Noble, Better World Books, A1 Outlet,
BookPlus, CDON

Even though Ive arrived (more than likely), I dont see that as a reason to stop working.
My Machinemore than likelywill not and wont stop just because Im being
rewarded with a little recognition and fame. Theres always ways to improve. And
Parallax still has many pages to go until I get a comic book series Im completely happy
with, and Im sure Manifesto and Parallax will continue, indefinitely, till death, or until I
get arthritis and carpel tunnel syndrome. One or the other. I used to think I could quit my
hobbies after I succeeded. Now I know better. Just because youre being rewarded for
your efforts by media, publicity, retail, and publishers doesnt mean you need to stop. Its
more fun to just keep chugging away, keep working daily, every day, and plugging
away, just to see what happens. I clearly find the most satisfaction in working, and
continuing to work, even after Ive made it to the top of the pyramid. Now that life has
gotten a lot (And I mean, a lot) easier, I guess all I really should do is keep focusing on
honing, continuing, improving, and refining my craft. Ive got a good routine going, and
a little press coverage probably wont alter or impede that too much. But it does make life
more worth living and enjoyable.

Now would be as good a time to rest and relax as any. I need to catch my breath. Ive had
a big last 3 weeks, in February of 2012. The year has started off really, really good for
me. No lie. Not stretching the truth at all. I hardly ever do. I dont need to. My brand is

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built on authenticity and real things, not made up things (names, reputations, and
whatnot) like you see on TV docs and commercials half the time.
Well, considering who I am, I dont really see pricing my book at $40 online to be
overcharging. Considering Im a pioneer, and my career and lifes work is worth a lot
more than $35-$40, Id say the price is well worth peoples hard earned money. If you
eventually buy a copy of Art Manifested, youll be seeing a lot of my very best work of
all time. Andrew is giving me a lot of bullshit about Art Manifested. Keeps saying make
youre book cheaper. No ones gonna pay for that! I guess well see. Hes still a knowit-all though. One of the biggest in the world. Not everything has to be free and cheap.
This is a collectors item book were talking about, from the man who invented YouTube
anime streaming, for Christ sake, Andrew. Not a rap album.

Things I can do with my fame-success:

Fill out Resume

Compose New Portfolio (use published book as part of portfolio)
Add positive press to my resume
Compile Press Kit
Answer Press Inquiries

Ive so far done everything in my power to promote my first book. So for the most part,
either people will buy the book, or they wont. Either way, things will probably return
back to order pretty soon. Relatively speaking. Some relatives and friends might buy a
few copies. That is enough for me. If people want to buy the book, great, if they dont,
Ill be fine regardless. But now Im officially a publicized author with a book in Amazon
and the Barnes & Noble website.
So Im going to have to ask myself. Now what? Whats next for J.M. Matthews and
Joseph Alberts?
Simple: More Comics, More Books. Pretty much it. Not worrying too much about
publishing, promotion, and publicity at this point. Im giving myself at least until the end
of 2012 till I finish my new manuscript, be it a novel, comic, literary anthology, or art
book.
It took $900 out of my own pocket to make Art Manifested happen. So the budget for the
book (Neat Scanner, Publishing expense) was $900 of my own money. But nonetheless
my Mom says shes very proud of me for having the courage and forwardness to put a
book on the market. Andrew and Cary also are pretty supportive for the most part. They
may complain a lot, but they do seem to care despite that.

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Paris and France have sheltered and produced many of the greatest architects in the
history of the worldarchitects who represent both fantasy and reality. Thats common
knowledge. Eurasia has the majority of the greatest architecture, and also the most
influential. No wonder I want to eventually visit that amazing land of manmade and
classic buildings. Im one of the best architects of hypothetical architecture in the world,
because of my sketch archives. I have the natural talent for constructing buildings and
cities on paper. And I can do that very thing time and time again, over and over without
batting an eye. France is a designer and engineer centric country, just like Japan and
China.
Its hard to tell just how much power I possess just right now. More than I used to have,
thats for certain.

Thursday, February 23, 2012,

Adults are better than childrenby a mile. Why? Well, for starters, adults have all the
power, and children have very little. What little power teens and children DO have is
given to them by adults, in the adult world. Children, and young teens are weak and
powerless. Im not interested in that age group at all. I like being around the ones with the
power: The adults. As an adult, I have a certain amount of power. We all do.
So now that I think about it, if Im going to have a main demographic, I want it to be one
with some social and economic power: Adults and young adults. 18-65 years old. Thats
how old I want my audience to be.
In the 90s, smoking cigarettes as a salaryman, particularly Marlboros (in China when
working at factories) was considered a certain kind of status symbol. I guess Im actually
a little guilty of too. Screw cars and trophy wives. I want my Marlboros. Well, currently I
smoke Winstons, because theyre sort of hand-me-down cigarettes. I stole them from
mommy. I actually cant afford Marlboros, just like every other status symbol I want
and am saving for.

Having my first commercial product on the market and available in 5+ online stores
available for anyone to have, is definitely reaching my destination. How can I continue to
advance my work and career though? It might be handy for submissions to mainstream or
indie publishers who might publish me under more normal circumstances, in the future.
Potential publishers of my Mono stories: Marvel, Dark Horse, Image, Oni, SLG, Yen,
and a smaller publisher, like Top Shelf. Any of those publishers publish the kind of
graphic literature I produce regularly, on a pretty consistent basis.

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Choices:
Top Publishing Choices: Dark Horse, Image, Oni Press, Top Shelf.
Top Countries to Distribute in: United States (every state), France, China, Japan, Canada
Top Bookstores to Sell in: Amazon, Barnes & Noble, Books-A-Million
Top Networks: CN, Adult Swim, Nicktoons, Nickelodeon
Top Animation Studios: JM Animation, Sony, CN Studios, Titmouse, Spike
Top Mediums to Work In: Animation, Anime, Comics, Novels, Hollywood, webcomics
Franchises: Mono, Oliver, Dream, Realm, Shadow, Yazu
Salary: Any & All
It all comes down to me; to this. How much skill do I actually really have in real reality.
Im speaking of art specifically. The truth about what you publish is its always going to
be flawed in your (the authors) eyes. Sometimes you just have to accept the gifts god
gave you a long time ago, and settle on your own voice, flaws and all.
So, with Art, I used a little Real Marketing Muscle this time around, and I just noticed
how powerful my Marketing Muscle is. I actually really am pretty strong. Ill have to do
it again sometime. Its a lot of managerial type thing to keep track ofself-publishing
things; co-publishing thingsJust the usual. Nothing big.
However, if nothing else, 2005-2012 was the 8 straight years where I had the opportunity
to see, witness, and realize the extent of my real influence, or power. Though it can be
incredibly delicate, Im more influential and strong than I ever realized in my early life.
The average sketch I do daily, generally only takes me 1 to 5 minutes to draw. Those are
the ones I never show to anyone. Theyre quick sketches. God Im lazy in art. From now
on, Ill be timing all my drawings on and off, to get a sense of just how long Im
spending on a blank piece of paper. How many minutes am I spending on each piece of
artthat doesnt suck?
New Years Renovation?
10+ minute drawings. I need to draw more art that takes 10+ minutes, or a lot more. 3
minutes just aint cutting it.
No matter who the positive press is about, its always leaving out somebody.
Everywhere I go, ever channel I watch or listen to, I am surrounded by the stupidity,
failure, greed, power-lust, and shortsightedness of The Other. I am reminded of the
ignorance and superficiality of the Collective Other 24/7. And while some do look
somewhat like me, what they cant fake is their own raw ignorance, when compared to
me.

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I dont know if Ive peaked yet. Maybe, maybe not. Ive still got a decent amount of
things Im aiming to do. Parallax and Oliver-E still have a lot of work left in them before
theyre complete. And the time I spend on my artwork looks to be increasing. There are
some good prospects on the horizon. But Im definitely at my first major peak, which is
great. I spent a lot of time preparing for this moment and time span in my life.
Roku to the Rescue. Saving me from boredom, and from having to interact with bad,
parasitic things, like regular TV.
Mrs. Hess is going to buy 2 copies of Art from me. So thats $20 each if she buys them
directly from the author (me). So thats like a free $40 for me in profit right there. Ive
decided to set up a mini-competition between myself and Amazon, to see if I can sell
more copies of my book than the 5 online stores that carry Art
Amazon sells Art for $40 a pop, which is kind of weird that it wont go below me
charging $35 for my own bookespecially considering I only earn $7 from each copy
sold online. So
I sell discount copies of my own book for $20 each. So far Ive given out 1 review copy
for free to an editor, and more than likely will be able to sell 2 copies of Art ($40) to
Jean and her family
Manifesto is an ocean of words and letters. A universe of words and letters. Just floating
there on the page and screen, waiting to be explored and traversed.
Friday, February 24, 2012,
Time-Conscientious Drawing and Sketching
Good drawings and sketches take time. At least 10+ minutes each. If you put labor into a
drawing, it typically shows. You can always identify 1-3 minute drawings in the fact that
they almost always suck. 10+ or more minute drawings are the way to go. My shittiest
artwork takes neither effort nor time to create. Shame on me for allowing 1 minute
drawings for so long and 10 years in a row.
Did 9 pages today so far, and spent a total of around 30 minutes lingering on those 9
pages, with the most work heavy drawing (Blade of the Immortal dismemberment fanart)
being 9 minutes long in drawing time. That one REALLY wore me out actually. Damn
Im lazy and out of shape. One should really be in shape to do this kind of thing. Most
good artists are in shape if you dont count me.
Failed drawings, ones that are 10 minutes or so, feel like they take longer to draw than
they do. I drew one bad drawing that took 10 minutes. Felt like a 15-20 minute drawing
session, not a 9 minute one. Time slows down my perception if Im not enjoying the
drawing process but doing it anyway. Its like being in pain. Because of how bad it feels,
time stands still.

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God my comics pages suck for the most part, with rare exceptions. Out of the last 200
comics pages, maybe 1 or 3 of them out of the entire 200+ pages actually look like they
took more than 10 to 20 minutes to draw.
Fast, Quick Drawing = Cheap, Sucky, Shitty Drawing
Slow uncomfortable drawing at my drawing/Computer Table = Beauty
Im going to have to start forcing myself to draw for more than 30 minutes a day.
Im also going to have to force myself to spend more than 5 minutes on each drawing.
This may FEEL like it hurts me, but the result(s) will be better, more appealing art, in
both pencil and ink. And maybe paint too.
I didnt spend a great deal of time or effort on controlling my lines or adding extra forms,
patterns, backgrounds, costumes, and details in the past, so now I have the portfolio of a
lazy artist. How dare I call myself an artist if Im not going to take the TIME to get it
done right. I have no right to call myself an artist unless Im going to start putting my
TIME into my art.
KEY COMPONENT = TIME [AND LOTS OF IT]
OK, I admit it. I am a little jealous of Miyazaki. I find his films a bit boring. I dont see
what all the hype is about. I dont like the aesthetics of his design system. To me, its
always looked ugly. I dont find it appealing like Akira Toriyamas, Otomos, Moebiuss,
and Min Woo-Hyungs designs. To me, I dont like curvy, classical designs. I like
progressive anime design better than regressive. Ive always had this preference. This is
just my opinion, nothings changed. I dont dislike Miyazaki as a person. He seems old
and wise. But Im definitely an adult Shonen and Seinen guy.
List of Manga-Ka who also are also involved in the anime adaptation:
Eiichiro Oda
Masamune Shirow
Otomo
Tezuka
Miyazaki
Yoshyuki Sadamoto
Jhonen Vasquez
Aaron McGruder
Todd McFarlane
Not many

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Manga-Ka who arent involved in their own anime:

Yasuhiro Nightow
Oh! Great
Hiroaki Samura
Kosuke Fujishima
Yu Yu Hakusho
CLAMP
Masashi Kishimoto
Id only consider Myself a manga-ka if I started spending AT LEAST (at the VERY
least) 20 to 50 minutes on each of my drawings individually. I dont do that as of yet. But
I will, and probably sooner than I initially suspected. The paper is ready any time. My
pencils and pens are ready any time. Its a matter of when I am able and willing, not
when am I ready. Every minute I spend writing about it is a minute I dont spend doing it.
Feelings, your negative emotions, negative comments, critics, haters, and the media
should not determine when and if you draw. Just like you dont need to be in a good or
positive mood to draw and start drawing. The Snake will always try to hiss things at you.
The Snake, Resistance, negative comments, attitudes, and criticism are all blocking
devices, and need to be ignored. You can draw whether theyre there or not. You can
draw whether they put you in a foul mood or not.
Most Threatening Things in the Networks Eyes:

Me, Drawing a lot and starting to Draw

Me using Roku
Me, Using YouTube

The networks scatter and panic like clockwork any time I do any of these things. To me,
its like sending off a bat signal for crazy media competitor people who want to keep in
step with me.

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Thing necessary for my job as an artist:

Focus
Concentration
Science
Attention to Detail
Energy
A steady hand
Fearlessness and Courage
Detachment
Dexterity
Patience

Composition, Illustration, & Storytelling

Illustration with good compositions. Good compositions take up the entire page.
Nothing is left blank. The whole sheet of paper or panel must be filled up with
form and texture and line and weight.
Illustration and Storytelling. Something must be happening. Some action must be
taking place. There must be an image in the middle of or representing a sequence
of events.
Telling and Narrating a Story & Scene, & Mapping It Out

Make a Simple Map of the Scene, so you know where everything is happening in
the picture.
In Illustration, Something Happens, and the Illustration is a Camera Shot of a
Moment in Time.

Drawing and Illustration, REAL Drawing and Illustration, takes planning, analysis,
focus, and time
Turned on the TV, but it wasnt really about me, so I turned it off. Terribly boring.

What really matters

I honestly dont care about drawing comics or anime right now. Or the internet for the
matter. I dont care about any of the things I cared about in the past. All I care about here
and now. I care about Andrew finally being able to move his ass the hell out of Florida,
because lets be honest: I wont be able to move out and get a job until he already has
moved out from Mom and Dads house. Because, power struggle or not, like it or not, for
myself or ANYONE really, including Mom and Dad, its the same story over and over
again. The younger brother cant make any real tactical moves if the older brother keeps
failing to launch. His failures, numerous as they are, throw mud at both our names. His

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failure to succeed is dishonorable, and the more he whines and throws tantrums about it,
the more dishonorable he makes us, his entire family look. I dont wish for my brother to
fail. I just wish hed stop stealing my throne. It makes both of us look incompetent,
idiotic, and bad. Hes not a team player, and if he continues to not be a team player on all
levels, he continues to risk failure on all or most levels. The suspense is killing me. It rots
my soul. I hate how Im forced to be this close to someone with this much failure coming
out of their soul, mind, and life. I dont think I hate my brother, but Im definitely sick of
watching him fail and block my flight path.

Saturday, February 25, 2012,

Between this morning and yesterday, between yesterday and today, Ive spent
approximately 1 hours working at my art, drawing
Free Numero-Reading:
You were born with the potential to work long, hard, and patiently. If theres a job
requiring a good deal of time, much difficult work, and careful attention to detail, you can
probably do it well.
See, any job, just about any job I do is going to be uncomfortable, a strain and high
pressure, for many hours a week.
Im really starting to like my patterns archive. My latest addition only took me 30
minutes to draw.

On the plus side, I am a perfectionist and workaholic.

On the negative side, often, when pursuing practice of a craft, Ill abandon work
on my projects prematurely, either just when its getting good, and/or just when
Im about to master it, or just when Ive mastered it, right after Ive mastered it.
Exhaustion sets in whenever the most extensive proficiency has been attained.
Stop the stopping. I need to keep working, especially right after Im incredibly
proficient at the task.

Did a new Moebius Production Design Study earlier. Since my art is getting more
detailed, who better to study than the Lord of All Detail? Rivaled only by McFarlane,
Syd Mead, and Otomo.
Now that Im timing myself with a stop watch, my art productivity rate has shot up, as
has the quality level of my designs, sketches, and illustrations. I spent at least 2+ hours
drawing today, with few to no breaks. Mostly I was working on channeling most of my
variety of good (and bad) thoughts into images and designs on paper. The extra practice

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and time began paying off today and yesterday. My art is as detailed as its ever been,
and seems to be reaching its newest level and form of detail.
When I set out to study the Masters, I dont just study and analyze their drawing
techniques and compositions. I absorb their styles into my own style, and have been
known to linger in the absorption of certain artists styles:
Jhonen Vasquez
Todd McFarlane
Frank Miller
Jeff Smith
Moebius
Katsuhiro Otomo
Bruce Timm
Hiroaki Samura
In some ways I can do something that resembles analyzing an artists style to get inside
that artists head using empathic mind-reading telepathy. I dont just try to analyze the
artists thought process. I can literally read their design-mind.
So Ive reached the level of powerpost-Art: Manifested in my sketchbooks that Ive
wanted to attain all along. Why am I still so depressed? My art looks like I wanted it to
all along: Incredibly detailed. Ive achieved a sufficient level of success. I guess I thought
Id be happier and not still living with my parents by the time I reached this level.
SoNow what? Im going to keep buildingduring the day. Night, and the tiredness
that goes with it increases the amount of gravity surrounding me. Success is so
depressing.
Why are the Gods of animation, anime, manga, and comics talking to me? What did I do?
What makes me that special that people as important as the Gods of the field find it
appropriate to communicate with and correspond with me. No one in my family believes
this, but my other friends in the media do. Who knows? Maybe they get lonely at the top
too.
Its a simple matter of finding a means to an end. That is how today was before I called it
a night. I set a specific goal in my research. Lean how, teach myself how to improve, and
get better at drawing. I improved, I evolved, and I got better at drawing. I worked long.
I worked hard. And I worked patiently, just like my psychic reading said I tend to do, and
somehow the results ended up speaking for themselves for a change. I do draw better now
than I did.
Hmmm. I was Frank Miller, for a while there. Now as far as I can tell I seem to be
Moebius. Hardly anyone seems to know who Moebius is, at least in the places I go, so no
one seems to notice the current form of my style yet. Plus none of its on the computer
yet. Maybe Ill scan it pretty soon.

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Some people in Japan, TV, and Hollywood are definitely jealous of me. And it starts with
my brother. Theyre all jealous. Very jealous. Incredibly jealous. They WISH they had
this much sales power and charisma. Some people attack me because they viciously envy
that which I have. Its quite transparent. Not to hard to figure out what is going on. The
same people mocking me are the ones who envy my status, design, and marketing power.
Hard to be me when they clearly envy me so much.

Drawing comics isnt easy. But my task is pretty clear:

All I really have to draw on 11 x 17 is the following:

Cities & Their Architecture

Anatomy, Poses, and Intense Martial Arts Combat w/ Weapons
Trenchcoats

Thats my series understructure.

So Ive been studying some reality-based gun magazines to learn how to draw firearms
better. I do like a certain amount of realism in my weapons. I look at a lot of pictures,
mostly not even on web for the most part. So yes, I guess I am a bit of a gun-nerd, just
like Im an anime-nerd. Im an anime/gun-nerd.
But the gun thing. They say about writing and screenwriting, write about what you know.
Well, I kind of know guns, and I kind of know rhythm and visual intelligence. Why not
just combine them, and amalgamate them into my style? Guns are dangerous. They
should not be taken lightly. And they kill people, worst of all. But they also
makereally, really cool Hollywood movies. Quentin Tarantino and John Woo are both
colleagues in the filmmaking world, and masters of philosophizing combat and violence.
Am I destined to follow in their footsteps, in their shadow? Not that Im complaining. I
also think it would be cool to integrate High Fantasy, Science-Fantasy, and gun-fu. I
mean, hell, why not? Sounds cool to me.
I was surprised. There is actually a lot ofquite a bit of gun literature out there, devoted
solely to guns, guns, n more guns. Interesting.
Sword Fantasy is often considered a manga-type thing. Well, that and Sword and Sandal
or Jedi. Im not doing any of those. Im cutting up and carving out my own style in the
public arena. Im doing my own thing. I dont really conform to any genres that I didnt
create myself. I create my own subgenres to work in.
From now I focus on comics, in terms of what kind of work I do. No more of this
animation moonlighting crap. Im not an animator. Im a cartoonist. There is a difference.
I put a lot of time into my drawings, and I will continue doing so for a long time to come.

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Awww yeah. Im INDIE HARDCORE. Being hardcore indie doesnt really pay much if
any money. But it is a license to innovate. Forget the Japan way. Indie publishing in
America is the best way. All this fame has screwed up my priorities. I still remember
when kids aspired to draw stuff like Scud, Bone, and Spawn and there was actually a
market of stores you walk in and out of to support it. Its different now, but theres still
options. Webcomics and self-published small print-run comics are the new indie comics.
Indie kids used to be so cool. They were the coolest slackers in the world, just like me.
Slackin, playing in bands, and drawing all day, NEVER Growing up. There was only us:
The slackers, there to mock the nerds and make fun of the hyper popular kids who hated
us equally as much. The internet has screwed up artists priorities. Its also screwed up
the priorities of mainstream comics too. Its put everyone on the same alleged level, and I
dont know if thats such a good thing, or if its what God intended.
Publishers used to be cool with me. Now they see me as a loose canon, a burden, and a
threat to their already popular pre-existing artist, who love to tear into me in their little
blogs and interviews. Its enough to make a guy not want to bother with publishers at all,
and just draw comics that never leave his desk drawer or basement, attic, whatever.
Thats actually a really good idea. Draw stuff that never leaves my bedroom. And
eventually, 2 decades from now, when Im 50 and still unemployed because nobody
bothered, THEN Ill self publish some comics through Lulu or something. Im not so
pretentious like some of these self-righteous indie publishers where I feel like my artwork
ever even needs to leave my house. I like keeping it all to myself. Having an audience
sucks. All theyd do would be say hurtful things, criticize me, and not buy my comics.
What the hell IS and audience for anyway. I dont draw comics for money or an audience
or publisher. Audiences and publishers are dicks. They suck a left nut. People who only
draw for audiences and publishers are fools doing a foolish thing. I draw for an audience
of 1. Me. And its gonna stay that way. Ill see to that. Why would I want the purity and
awesomeness of my art ever be tainted and sullied by an audience?
I really want to draw the next Zounds! Something my friends offline and in real life
would like, or at the very least I would like, and that stays on papers around my house,
nowhere else. Zounds! was always drawn, never scanned. It was a Me Thing. No one
elses. No one else even knows what Zounds! is or was. Zounds! was me at my cartoonist
peak. Since then Ive moved onto improving to more detailed artwork.
I found this script excerpt in the Disney/Viacom animation studios one day, when
rummaging through their garbage.
Villain of Some Famous But Fail-Tastic Lame-Ass Third-Rate TV Show
Ha ha ha! I am a villain on TV, and I am evil. Ha ha ha! No amount of anime or cartoon
action can stop me! HA HA HA! Evil and such! HA HA HA!
See?! See!? He ADMITED hes evil! On a TV cartoon show (according to the PAID
writers for that studio anyway). What more proof do you need??!! Surely no ones getting
stabbed in the back on THAT show.

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Mind if I steal some of you power by copying you? No? Good. Ha! Im you! I suck.
From the 48 Laws of Power:
Law 44
Disarm and Infuriate with the Mirror Effect
The mirror reflects reality, but it is also the perfect tool for deception: When you mirror
your enemies, doing exactly as they do, they cannot figure out your strategy. The Mirror
Effect mocks and humiliates them, making them overreact. By holding up a mirror to
their psyches, you seduce them with the illusion that you share their values; by holding
up a mirror to their actions, you teach them a lesson. Few can resist the power of
Mirror Effect.

Theres actually no work breaks for the jobs I actually know how to do, so I would
suppose that would make me unemployable. I cant get a job anywhere. Theres no office
jobs I know how to do, and all I know how to do with computers is manage websites, edit
videos, and author DVDs. In my quest to Become Employable, all my dilly-dallying has
achieved the opposite: Its made it impossible to hire me. Ive already looked for a job. I
dont know how to do anything pragmatic or laborious. Just write and draw, and those
things are hard enough.
Im starting to consider giving up my long-cherished search for the perfect and ideal
entertainment and show business job, in favor of making money the old fashioned way:
with a regular job. Working at the grocery store back in 2001 wasnt that bad. Maybe I
can work as a cashier at a store somewhere, like a bookstore or something, or a grocery
store. Im going to have to start making some lists in the next few weeks. Theres got to
be some job I can do. I dont have to like it. I just have to do it. Even being an office
janitor would probably be okay
Local Stores:
Target
Winn-Dixie
Walgreens
Wal-Mart
Publix
I think the common knowledge about jobs is most of them do provide you with work and
do pay money if your willing to do the work. Its just the thing is, people are naturally
lazy, and their lazy nature tricks them into not wanting to earn money through the job by
doing the unpleasant work.

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Well I realized something important today: Drawing for hours a day, being an illustrator?
Absolutely no different in terms of discomfort from the time I spent working at the
grocery store. If anything, my first day job at the grocery store taught me that any job
worth doing, that pays you well, is gonna suck.
Well, I sort of know how to be a cashier. Maybe Ill find somewhere that employs one of
those. Publix seems nice. So do Target and Wal-Mart. I cant rely on government checks
and mum and dad my whole life. And I wont be supplementing my income with art
money anytime soon.

Daily Schedule:

12:30 Wake up with temporary amnesia about what I did and planned the
previous day
12:302:003:00 p.m. Wake up, eat breakfast, drink drinks, watch cartoons,
TV, web
3:00 Good cartoons go off air. TV: Dead airtime. Boredom sets in, workday
starts
3:005:00 Work Day, Start Working, Height of focus, alertness, and awakeness,
write & draw. Evade Andrew and Carys tempers, which tend to flare up at this
time.
5:0010 p.m. Drink, smoke, have dinner, watch TV, Journal, wind down, read,
relax, deal with life and its problems (i.e. Andrew and Dads pathetic tantrums
that are predictable and you can set your watch to).
10 p.m.1:30: Lie in bed, get up, talk to family, eat snacks at midnight, take pills
at 11 p.m., relax in bed, fall asleep at 1:20-1:50 p.m., lie sideways, turn overhead
fan on to air condition room, ventilate leg, watch Adult Swim, laugh. Dream or
dont. Sleep till 12:30. Do the whole thing over again the next day.

Newest Invention: PC-Glasses and Sunglasses

In the future, computer monitors will be built into a light thats projected onto the vision
of the lenses in eyeglasses. Like the iPhone, or an MP3 player, with a tiny projection
screen / monitor, but built into your glass frames, which projects the software user
interface into the lenses of your glasses.
Research the following: Biorhythm.
Theory: Hacking a Person/Societys biorhythm. Social Engineering.
The schedule I made up wasnt from my imagination. I didnt make it up. Its based on
the natural progression of time and how me and the world around me are manipulated by
that invisible subconscious, unconscious schedule, and yield to it, and how we all already
follow our own internal schedule without knowing it or knowing about it. Thats the

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rhythm of daily living, the rhythm of our neurobiological interrelated reaction, and
neurophysiology. Time influences and manipulates both thought and action without even
trying.
I do a lot of technical writing in my journal. Theories Ive written in my journals
(Manifesto) like the ones above and before are scientific, linguistic, theoretical, and
philosophical ones. It doesnt take a Degree, college education, or articles to be a
scientist. All it takes is the ability to think of a sound, original, inventive invention or
theory; something that works and makes sense in the scientific community (on some
level). After all, the theory of relativity wasnt created by and is not the product of an Ivy
League Education. It is the product of a scientific mind. A naturally analytical mind
created that theory, and many others, not a college education. I learned about animation
and science from self-education, folk education, and mentoring from teachers and books I
communicated with and learned from back in high school, while attending a private
charter school that was a very relaxed environment for the most part. I learned quite a bit
about filmmaking and music (rhythm, lighting) in night school, not art school. I wasnt at
art school long enough to absorb much of the curriculum. Which is not to say you cant
learn anything from art school. You can learn a lot from art school, and you can teach
yourself a lot about how to develop a full composition of artwork in art school, just by
observing the art from the people around you.
Rhythm, to me, never gets boring. I cant get enough of rhythm in music and technology.
Its never boring! Just like science and technology are never boring. Interesting and
academic subjects interest and entertain me more than non-academic ones. Learning to
me is fun. Educating myself about subjects I dont know and havent learned yet is fun.
Work is fun, and academics are fun, when youre a scientist or engineer of some variety,
even when its only the entertainment variety, like a science fiction designer,
illustrator, or artist. Graduating from primary school and retiring from traditional
secondary education not only ended up boring me. It made me feel a bit lost and bored.
At least schoolwork and homework, and art assignments from Phil and Rima gave me
something to do: Work on projects. Its too bad Andrew finds my academic interests and
aesthetic and artistic interests so boring and dull. Otherwise if someone more similar to
me was here, someone who understood me better, at least Id have someone to talk to,
like the Jean Hess and Chris Hess, or someone. Theyre smart, and they understand
mostif not allof what I say. But theyre not around all the timeonly every so
often. Their support of myself, my pursuits, and interests is a sign of true friendship.
They visit with permission, speak in turn, say kind, justified, and supportive things, and
at least make the effort, at the very least. They also support nearly everything I do, and
are more than happy to endorse me in any of my pursuits, till death do us part. Chris isnt
exactly like me. He doesnt look, sound, or even communicate like me, but that doesnt
affect our friendship. Andrews kind of gotten in the way of that relationship in the last
few years. Andrew is pretty selfish about how he spends his own time with me. Still. Its
all something to write about.

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Countries where my book is available to buy online: America, Canada, Norway, Finland.
My book already has North American and European e-retail credibility, even if its really
just through third-party retailers.
Co-Production Status For TV Animation:
Nickelodeon: Monsuno, The Legend of Korra, Iron Man
Cartoon Network: Thundercats 2011, Generator Rex, Redakai: Conquer the Kairu
Adult Swim: Big O 2
Toon Disney: Oban Star-Racers
Boomerang: Puppy in my Pocket
The Hub: Deltora Quest
Marvel and G4: Blade
Co-Production is American Style Action-Adventure Meets Japanese Anime. That is
essentially the look of a co-production.
Co-Pros Foster: Communication, Multiculturalism, Creativity, Artistry, Literacy,
Diplomacy, Patience, Negotiation, Teamwork, Tolerance, Friendship, Entrepreneurship,
Autonomy, and Managerial Business Skills.
Generally, people will really only see one large scale international co-pro on one channel
at a time, 1 show per timeslot.
Generally, Japanese-American co-productions are the biggest deal, followed distantly by
French-Japanese, French-Canadian, French-American, Korean-American, and CanadianAmerican Co-Productions. Yes, in that order.
How to Catch a Fag
Bill stood at the end of the hall, hiding behind the doorway that turned left.
Masturbation! Teen pregnancy! Anyone wanna TALK? Bill shouted across the house.
Tiny little footstep could be heard approaching from the other side of the house, then
those tiny footsteps could be heard shifting to a jog, and as the closer they got, they then
shifted into a Full on Sprint down the hall. A man in a suit with a fake face emerged. It
was Stephen Colbert!
Somebody call my name, he shouted
BAM! THUD! Bill whacked Colbert straight upside the back of his head with a baseball
bat, causing him to collapse to the floor in a pool of blood. Colbert didnt even notice
Bill, standing there, sneaking up on him.
Guess thats the end of that, Bill thought to himself, tossing the bat aside and walking
away through the front door of the house.

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Chapter 55
(XP)

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Monday, February 27, 2012

Art Manifested: By J.M. Matthews

PR Press Mentions News Articles: Featured in the News 16 Times

Available at All Major Online Bookstores
Sold in 4 Countries

The thing is, self-publishing and web-publishing is really a stepping stone to more
mainstream, traditional publishing. Im still hoping to publish traditionally.
Apparently some people think Im one of the industry insiders now. But its just retail.
Yes I have powerful knowledge, and know some secrets others would kill to have, but
its not like Id ever abuse my power and insider knowledge. Im like Google. I know
Many Things. To me, insiders have always been cool. I like data, and I like secrets, and I
especially like secret insider data. Im one step ahead of the competition, and this doesnt
bother me one bit. In my opinion, Ive been an insider for a while now, its just now
people are acknowledging me in the media as an insider in a more official way.

Barack Obama, the 44th President of the United States, is making it cool for Americans to
care about politics again. That hasnt happened since Bill Clinton took office.

Id really like to find a comic book mentor or take private or school based comic book
drawing classes, but comic book academics are in short supply. Im trained in every field
of drawing but comics!animation, illustration, fine artswhich is unfortunate, because
Id really like to receive some education in drawing comic book pages. My comics pages
are so crude, its driving me crazy. Theres no comic book teachers in Florida.

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Things my comic is missing:

Dialogue-to-Fight Transitions
Dialogue to put in speech balloons
Polished dialogue panels
Polished fight panel transitions

The goal is to build up a portfolio of all of these areas.

AnimeTV aside, I dont think Id ever really succeed at getting work in television. Im
going to have to stick to doing comics with no vision for Television. None of my favorite
comic book artists work in TV currently, Including Jhonen, Dave Sim, and Todd
McFarlane. Dave Sim quit working in comics a long time ago, and so did Jhonen. Things
have changed. I still kind of like television, but my real destiny lies with printed media. It
comes down to control. I have control in comics and novels. I have control over my
publishing projects. Im a control freak. If I dont have control over the project, it tends to
lose my interest.
I can perform miracles (like my DVD authoring, Manifesto, my art, Mono, and
engineering YouTube) every once in a while. But theyre so sacred in nature its only
natural I can perform a miracle no more than once every few years or decades. Im sort of
a real life mystical thaumaturgy practitioner.

Thursday, March 01, 2012,

Dear lord, that sucks ass. It would seem no one in America who isnt me knows how to
actually draw fighting manga. Apparently Im the go to expert according to many in
America. Ask the internet. Youll see. Not talking about American animation or Japanese
manga. Im talking about American comics. I strive to be the best at portraying fight
manga, and so far Ive succeeded. Im sure at one point if I ever become more widely
known, young people might ask me how I do that, how one goes about drawing fighting.
Considering its still in development, and Im in the process of mastering it, Ive still got
a while to go before anyone takes notice of my skills.

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The whole black fetish thing kind of sickens me. Much like High Fantasy and Science
Fiction, my mind does not equate black with sexual. I always wondered why
recently, some people, particularly female emos and non-goths attempt to sexualize the
color black so much. To me, sexuality is a sign of decay and weakness. Ive always
viewed it this way. There WAS NO starting point. It was a natural progression. To me, I
equate black with power, strength, violence, and wisdom. To me black and dark are
masculine qualities. It is the young female psychefound online quite often, and on
TVwhich tends to pervert said color. Ive never understood this lust for black some
women have. Apparently theres gothic masculine (transcendental), and gothic feminine
(sexual, untrustworthy). To me such associations are unacceptable. If its sexual, its
never truly black. Black is cool. Its not supposed to make people horny What kind of
fucking idiot sees things that way. Damn rookies. Im aware some people assume
differently about power colors (probably because they themselves are weak in nature),
but trying (and failing) to make black actually seem sexual isnt me, or anything I
actually stand for that matter. Black is a comfort color for me and nothing more. Its
interesting how so many people have read into that relationship in what is obviously a
very, very WRONG way.

For some reason, hyper-aggressive and realistically violent cartoons give me a Zen-like
calm. Dynamic violence in animation puts me at ease. I dont mean where a smoke of
cloud appears and you see cartoon arms protruding. I mean real violence. Violent movies,
cinema and animation from Japan and America (not malicious violence, but the poetic
martial kind) is great therapy! Its my release from reality. I like seeing chaos and
violence on screen, in a cartoon. That goes for comics too. The more violent, the better.

A part of me (the headstrong part) really, really hates being at the mercy of one lone
individual editor or producers opinion. I dont like the whole Showbusiness Gatekeeper
thing. Kind of creeps me out that they have that much power over my career and destiny.
Especially when I realize Ive already done more than enough to prove myself in the eyes

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of many. Why should the editor or producer hold the keys to the kingdom? I know all
about that. I know how this works. And I hate it! Im used to having power to spare. In
publishing and TV I have no power. It angers me, quite a bit. The status quo endlessly
frustrates me, especially since I realize its out of my hands, and in some other schmucks
hands. Thats how entertainments always been. Im definitely not the boss here.
Being online is painful.
Being an artist is painful
Channeling my power is painful
Being a genius is painful
Being a psychic mystic is painful
All these things together with a stressful home environment and no money = Ultra-Pain.
I got one serious migraine. Maybe I just need a pill for that. Human contact is something
I dont know how to handle. It gives me stress, migraines, general headaches.
I can only relax if not too many things are on my mind.

Whats the point of counting the number of anime TV episodes I watch? Ive got better
things to brag about than how much anime I watch.

Okay, so I invented the Form@ Manuscript. Form@ Manifesto. I have 2 huge stacks, one
of speculative fiction writing, the other of primarily mediocre (but still very effortful)
comic book pages and layouts. Both are Form@ Manuscripts. Good, Ive done hundreds
of pages for the 2 categories Im working in (fiction writing & comic book art). Ive only
done 1/10th the amount I really need to do. Ive got about 2,000 future failures to go
before I have any real success. I need to fail a lot more when at the blank page. The only
way to succeed is to fail. And fail over and over again. This is because only 1/10th of the
work I produce isnt failure. So I need to multiply my productivity rate by 10 in order to
reach a level Im satisfied with. My Moebius and Frank Miller fanart is actually very
good, and its helping me establish my own style, so it has its use, but Ive still got a lot
of failures and bad drawings in me left to go. Stupid people are failures at life precisely
because they are afraid to fail. Failure isnt stupidity or ignorance. Its a stepping stone to
progress. If you truly want to succeed in some field, any field, you must be willing to fail

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at it 1,000 times over before you reach any milestones of progress. Geniuses are different
from dummies because theyre not afraid to fail. Im not afraid to fail. I used to be, until I
separated myself from the timid, ignorant, and blind masses, and woke up to reality (i.e.
failure).
There are times when Im nothing more than a consciousness drifting and floating above
a being. Lately, I sometimes focus on the task at hand so much, I feel purely like a spirit,
like a have no body. Sometimes I feel like my consciousness and mind isnt even
attached to my body, like I can still see myself, but it feels like nothings there, like Im a
spirit floating at the top of an unattached being. When Im in a contemplative mood, my
body feels nothing at all, neither pleasure nor pain, pretty much like it doesnt exist.
Strange. My body feels best when it doesnt exist to my mind, like I existed as nothing
more than a disembodied consciousness.
Why does Satan always drive the best art, and the best Darkness, and the best Dark Art?
From Spawn to Jhonen Vasquez to Marilyn Manson to Tool. All the coolest stuff is Hail
Satan This and Dark Lord and Master That. Satan drives a lot of good virtuosic art.
Speaking of Hail Satan, No wonder I dont have any money. Im sort of originally an
agent of God and Positive energy, and when

Money is the root of all evil

The Bible
Poverty is a spiritual proving ground. Most people who think the way I do never have any
money. Spiritual Power isnt driven by money. Spiritual Power is driven by values, and
by Virtue of Thought and Action.
Things needed to get shit done:

Ruler
Blueline Pencil
Mechanical Pencil

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11 x 17 paper
11 x 17 scanner
Microsoft Word
Reference Material (photos, mags, comics)
Stopwatch
MP3 Player
5 Hour Energy
Full Stomach
Form@ Journal

My first book to be available in Japan, as part of the Japanese e-retail market was not
something I initially saw as an actual comic, even though it has some comic book pages
in it. But yes, Ive learned a few things in my Quest to Not Suck and Go Worldwide. If
you really want to have youre comics distributed in Japan, to me it seems like publishing
directly through Amazon and CreateSpace is the best, most direct way to connect with
the Japanese market the way Ive somehow managed to, primarily by pure luck. If you
merely want Amazon shelf-space in Japan, self-publishing through CreateSpace is
definitely one way to go. Thats kind of what I already did. Its definitely an ego booster.
Whenever I get around to drawing real comics instead of just flirting with the concept
like I have, I think theres a lot of potential and possibilities in going that route too.
Theres nothing on TV but Phineas and Ferb on all 3 Disney Channels for 7 hours
straight (what sicko thought THAT one up?), so on the plus side that leaves me plenty of
time to practice and work. I should be glad TV has turned into a daytime wasteland. Less
things on TV means more opportunities for me in my house, on the page and word
processor screen. Better there be nothing on TV when Im busy working than something.
Its all according to my plan. Heh heh.
Profitable Areas of Expertise, Career Outlook:

Art, Writing, Comics, and Filmmaking

Franchising and Brand Building
Advertising, Sales, Marketing, and Public Relations
Internet, Software Engineering, and Technology
Consumer Electronics

Corey Jackson and Moebius are my two design heroes. Theyre my 2 science fiction
heroes. I made a break through today on paper, in ink, in my sketch notes, which leads
me to believe...

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Im getting closer and closer to drawing more similar to the way those 2 artists draw,
with each passing week and month. This is how I draw when I focus and put time and
effort into my art. Im closer than ever to mastering my own brand and style of
production design. But production design can be so detailed. The skys the Limit. Theres
no limit to how detailed you can make backgrounds. Its not really something any
engineer, production designer, or illustrator ever really masters. This is how an
INTP/INFP draws sketches at the age of 28. 3 decades almost. If not for the encouraging
words and support of Katsuhiro Otomo of Hipira and Akira, and Corey Jackson of
Invader Zim, and Jhonen Vasquez, Im not sure if I ever would have made it to this point
in my detail level and detail history. While I did use some reference, this illustration and
concept design is definitely aimed in the direction I want to go with my 600 to 1,000 page
science-fantasy comic book and action manga series. I actually find it a little shocking I
got this detailed at such a young age! I think the preliminary art, the Moebius fan-art I
drew a few days ago helped!

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Failing and making mistakes isnt so bad. As the drawings I did today demonstrate,
clearly I just have to work that much harder, spend that much extra time drawing and
lingering at the drawing board to bounce back that much more powerfully from my
powerful failures. Im being watched at all times by spies who are illegally hacking my
computers, but even that cant stop my art if I spend enough extra time compensating for
failure by building it.
The only real question I have left is: How exactly am I to package and sell the image of
my production design work. Its powerful, mysterious, complex, and all. But how do I
make money drawing something that detailed. Dont people tend to pay more for simple
art featuring human characters like the kind I already draw, and not hyper-complex
design work like the kind I did today? Eh, what the hell, Ill draw the kind of comics I
Want to See. Im not going to second guess the market. I dont know if I ever second
guessed the market. Im terrible at second guessing the market. All I really know how to
do is my own thing.
I had a pentagram on my wall when I drew this architecture. That means Lord Satan
helped me draw so detailed. The dark lord did that, not God probably. Not that I actually
believe in either one. Hail Satan! Satan gives me the power to draw more hyper-detailed
and cyberpunk-ish than everyone else. Well, that, or my own super-genius.

Satan Worshippers:
Marilyn Manson
Jhonen Vasquez
Trent Reznor
Tool
Tenacious D
Todd McFarlane
Primus
Slayer
Metalocalypse
Adult Swim
Akira Toriyama

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Nah, Im just kidding. Im not an actual Satanist. But I dont believe in Hell either, and
Im certainly not a Christian. I respect Christianity, and I also respect Satanism in some
ways as an underground gothic religion. Im actually more of an agnostic-Zen Buddhist.

Yes, I am indeed one of the Master Builder Masterminds Behind YouTube

Id take a break from computers, if it werent so disruptive to the fact that its kind of
turned into my full time job.
I try to take breaks from my work, but I work so hard, I dont know what to do with
myself.

My creative work is indeed very powerful. But whenever I do it I have to look out. It
changes many things around me, and takes a lot of power and energy out of me. All if not
most of it for the day. Maximum usage of my power leaves me fatigued and weak.
Easiest Powers to Use:

Journal

Hardest Forms of Power to Use:

Novel Writing Fundamentals

Comic Book Pages
Storyboards
Series Bible

Powers I Can Use With Relatively Little Hassle:

Scenes

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Outlines
Production Design

My most recent goalto draw more detailed, and spend more time on each drawing
has been reached. With a little help from my stopwatch. The stopwatch made me
considerably more time-conscious and time-cognizant recently, and because I reached
that mindset, it did exactly what I wanted it to do: Achieve my goal of devoting attention
to detail. Now I just need to keep using the stop watch, most of the time, when I draw.
Yay! Finally, everyone around me has moved on and Andrews not in the house and
suddenly, Im cool and popular and on my own again, just like art school. All is as it
should be. Im not getting any hostile vibes from anyone right now. Just peace and quiet
and time to relax with Mom at home. Andrew, when hes actually here, drags the coolmeter down considerably whenever hes here. The way he talks, acts, thinks, and treats
people. Theres nothing cool about him at all. Only if I make him cool, which hes not
without me. For once in my life, Im not on the team or side thats getting dissed. Andrew
is though. Hes a fool.

You know; manga-like, manga-ish, manga-influenced, wannabe manga, pseudo-manga,

quasi-manga, world manga, American manga, OEL mangathats all kind of what
Parallax is. Im setting the example dozens of comic book creators in the future will
follow with the internet and comics and publishing, the same way Osamu Tezuka, Walt
Disney, Moebius, Winsor McCay, Bill Watterson, Tim Burton, Katsuhiro Otomo, Ub
Iwerks, Bruce Timm, Jamie Hewlett, Todd McFarlane, Frank Miller, Dave Sim, and
Jhonen Vasquez set the model for almost everyone in the current generation to follow artwise.
For fantasy literary influence, theres Dr. Seuss, JR Tolkien, JK Rowling, Peter Jackson,
George Lucas, and Steven Spielberg.
For SF influence, theres Moebius, Otomo, THORES, Yoshiyuki Sadamoto, Corey
Jackson, Isaac Asimov, Stephen King, George Lucas, Ridley Scott, Jim Cameron, Syd
Mead.
For literary and animation influence, theres a whole lot.

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International Community, Internationalism: Because of the Internet

Because of the fact that the internet has international credibility, and I am so world
famous on it in some sectors (Im an New Paradigm international media celebrity),
Im competing on not only the local and national stage, but also the global and
international one. I believe culture, economics, and media hold value, not only to the
United States, but to Europe, Asia, and the entire world. Eventually Id like to get around
to traveling around the country and internationally to various parts of the United States
and World. I yearn to be a truly sanctified (in one respect) member of the Global
Community. War is my enemy. War is the Worlds Enemy. That is my peacemaker
philosophy.

No more freely commentating in this journal like a radio talk show host or something like
that. From now on I will write, primarily about the details of my story, outline, script, and
novel development:
Elements to include:
Character Biographies
Dialogue
Action
Description
Scenes
Outlines
Plot
And thats it. No more of this writing about blind ambition though, unless Im writing
down the personality or biography with a character who has blind ambition. No more me.
Fiction, not me.
Character like me:
Mystic
Unpopular

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Impoverished
Medical Specimen
Creative and Intellectual Giant
Nobel Prize Winner
Sibling
Perv
Genius
Introvert
Media Icon
Scientist
Computer programmer
Animator
Cartoonist
Webcomics artist

Scene:
Open to a medium shot of a white brick wall and a metal or wooden crucifix image
hanging on the wall. We then not long afterward remain in the same lingering camera
view of the crucifix, but the lights go off, to blackness. Then gunfire off screen
illuminates the wall, as blood splatters across the crucifix, once, and then a few more
times as we hear submachine guns going off on rapid fire off screen. Smoke emerges into
frame, then a wave of bullet holes pierce that same wall, hitting the crucifix numerous
times, shattering it, and destroying it as it falls off the wall and collapses off camera.
Gunfire ends, and the scene goes dark and silent
Cut to:
Card:
Text: Thou Shall Not Kill
V.O. off screen, narrating the opening line: You know. Its just death. Thats not such a
big deal, is it?

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Dissolve to: Opening Credits Montage and Title Card with low-key Sopranos-like music
playing in background.

Major Literary Works Ive Authored:

End Times Mono
Manifesto J.M.
Art: Manifested J.M.
Other than myself: The Following People Have Called Me A Genius at one point or
another:
Phil
Mrs. Toner
Donna Frank
Radford (AiFL)
Miss Choi
Amanda Martin
Johnny Bartlett
Chris Hess
Mrs. Jo Ann
People Online (at least 4 to 5)
Jean Hess

Premise: Mono works the graveyard shift while training for an elite promotion.
Dialogue: So where do you go at night anyway, Mono? Where do you go to exactly
anyway?
Mono: I go to training. I NEED my late night coffee. Dont have any.
Monos Daily Job:

Paperwork
Follow Noahs Orders
Fill Out Forms
Write Reports

Pursuit
Get Assignments (Missions)
Investigate Scenes and Locations with Forensics
Travel as Part of Mission Work

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Train, Spar, and Practice in a Dojo

Combat
Apprehend and Assassinate Criminals
Exterminate Demons, Slay Giant Apocalyptic Demon Insects
Hunt Demons and Nosferatu

Monos doing paperwork while watching DVDs right now (to help pass tim), at 1 a.m.

I was never raised byor interacted withmy actual real parents growing up.

New-Earth is not Middle Earth. The New Earth Western Providence has a Government,
Military Department, Paramilitary Department, Law Enforcement, and Justice System.
With all the crime-waves the End Times War and Apocalypse created, it kind of has to, at
least according to its Governing Parties. New Earth has a White House, Court Rooms,
Jails, Military Bases, Paramilitary Headquarters.
I represent the kind of anime and manga fan who aspires to make his own version of
comics at some point. Not one day, because that day is today, not some day in the
distant future! Theres nothing stopping me from drawing comics right now.

Ive been keeping an audio journal, a spoken word log, recorded onto a tape recorder,
where I narrate ideas and strategies for developing thoughts, concepts, ideas, stories, and
techniques, as they come to me throughout the day. I got a good 4 hours worth of spoken
word audio out of today, earlier this afternoon. Kind of like a homemade audiobook.
Kind of an epic, recorded spoken word audio experiment. I was the narrator of the tape. I
recorded it all myself, and was the main author-narrator of the spoken material.

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Chapter 55 (pt. 2)
(XP)

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Saturday, March 10, 2012,

Jean Giraud Moebius
R.I.P.

A True Architectural, Film, Animation, Anime, Comic Book, Manga, and Production
Design Pioneer.
Moebius was a heavy influence as of recently.

Thats so weird that this event happened on the same time I found this girl (my old friend
Nicole) online:

xoxoxoxo
A person who Ive been trying to find online for YEARS now. Now I have found her
online link (myspace.com/photoport). I dont know who to talk about more, Moebius, or
Nicole: The Hero (Moebius), or the Lover (Nicole) who I was sort of at one point
intimate with. I was in her dorm room at one time, back when I was in art school. I dont
have any photos of the 6 to 10 girls Ive been romantically flirtatious with. So Im going

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with the MySpace photo. Still, even though we havent seen each other in years and have
our share of physical distance, I remember a face, hair texture, and body like that
anywhere. Who else would be a Gemini thats simultaneously 4 or 5 inches shorter in
heightyet still 2 years olderthan me? Shes shorter than me, yet older than me. On
some level I was always aware of that. Still, other than Amanda Martin and Lorelei and
Jennifer Almond and Lori Roth, who else is female, but also attractive and that cool?

My favorite 22 Master Builders:

Quentin Tarantino
Moebius
Todd McFarlane
Dave Sim
Bill Gates
Speaking of Sir Bill Gates, Gates was knighted recently. Pretty cool, especially when I
remember that I actually got an automated response mail from him once as part of one of
his marketing campaigns.

In terms of Marketing, Promotions, and PR, DIY usually = Fail, at least in terms of sales.
Raging Against the Machine, Working Against the System and Tides just doesnt
work. Youll really be a lot better off if, when you have a product, you hand your product
over to your publisher and let them work their magic and mystical marketing guru ways
with it. Thats what I did with Art Manifested. I had the most buzz and attention with my
book when someone else, a Team, was taking care of the marketing. Ive fielded inquiries
but only ones my books and Amazons PR department has generated already. You can
get much further financially working with the system than spending a lifetime just trying
to find a way around it. Thats no good, as Ive learned the excruciatingly hard way.
Leave PR opportunities to the pros.

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The microblogging site, @Twitter, definitely looks to be headed in the direction of

complete and utter monetization. Im cool with that, but I hope theyre not stupid enough
to leave out my cut of the pie. Those are my (@ManjiBlades) tweets, and if theyre
going to make money I want a percentage and I want it in writing, on my monitor. That
could be a lot of profits were talking about. It would be a mistake for Twitter not to
compensate tweet authors, the way YouTube chose not to compensate all uploaders. One
of YouTubes worst mistakes. It left people like me feeling ripped off and betrayed. I
would not be happy if I saw the same policy take over again, justified only by some openended excuse, some blame copyright violation bullshit. Twitter doesnt violate
copyright any more than Blogspot does. But yeah, I say hell yeah Monetize Twitter. As
long as Im getting paid too, Id proudly endorse it. @ManjiBlade gets enough traffic I
dont think that account would necessarily lose money. Every time I post a link people go
to it. I dont have a problem with Monetization strategies other than the fact that they
make Andrew hit the ceiling and slam things. Other than that no ones really going to
notice a monetization strategy. Outside Voice Bully Time! Seriously, what good
parenting skills. Oh well.
So Im taking some weight loss pills today. Well, I must say, they do give you more
energy. Its nice to burn fat while doing nothing. Ive got to do something to get rid of all
this obesity fat.
Some topics on my mind lately:
Weight Loss Pills
Moebius death
Nicole
Twitter Monetization Strategies
Marketing
New-Earth Governance
I tried too finish all of my studies today, but never completed them. Maybe Ill read the
chapter on Focus in Writing tomorrow. The tiredness and night lethargy is starting to sink
in, and because I had a good mealPizzait makes the natural night tiredness that much
heavier.

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Show Im mostly watching: Yu-Gi-Oh! Aqua Teen Hunger Force

Shows Im leastly watching: Adventure Time. Level Up

How did I get started on Zounds? I copied drawings in my comics collection.

Thats one way to get inspiration and reference: Go digging through my ancient bins for
Wizard and Animation Magazine, indie comics, manga, and Superhero books.
In other words, pick old stuff with visual appeal.

Since Im big on technique, technical elements, creative process, method, and

methodology, its kind of obvious what Im most obsessed with: Technique and Process.
My favorite type of question has always been How. The How; How one does things;
How people do things. How in the world did you do that?How did you do that?I
like questions like that. How reveals process, steps, techniques, plans, planning, strategy,
and method.
I love How-To type technically academic books.
Iconic Leaders and Revolutionaries of History (Good and Evil)
Jesus H. Christ (Good)
The Buddha (Good)
Martin Luther King (Good)
Gandhi (Good)
Adolf Hitler (Evil)
Osama Bin Laden (Evil)
George W. Bush (Undecided)
Barack Obama (Good)

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Thats a list thats full of perfect leadership, for both good and evil exemplifying what
Good Leaders and Bad Leaders represent, and the personal qualities they personify.
Thats 5 Good Leaders, 2 Evil Ones, and 1 Undetermined, the ambiguous one being
undecided by his controversial standing today. He certainly Thinks hes the good guy.
But so did Adolf Hitler and Osama Bin Laden, hence making it hard to judge. The War
on Terror was not a universally supported war, first of all. But at the same time, has any
real actual war ever been universally supported?

What about PartyCon? Is there a convention for parties yet? Are they having that one
anytime soon? Id totally go to that one.

When writing fiction, whether short stories or novels, there are a few rules Im adding to
keep in mind

Write stories about topics

Dont always take a long time to write a plot, or sequence of events

Story idea:
Some guy wakes up, gets out of bed one morning, gets dressed and ready for the day, eats
breakfast, walks outside, and a meteor falls from the heavens and crashes into him. Kind
of an off day.
Topic: Meteors, surprises on a normal day.

Drawing With My Wrist Makes It Easier to Draw More Often and More Detailed
(No Fear of Starting. Easier to Finish)

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Drawing with your wrist INSTEAD OF w/ your elbow and arm / shoulder makes
drawing a lot less stressful. It makes it easier to approach drawing. It makes the detail in
your drawing look a lot better, more textural, and feel and seem less difficult to draw and
produce. Drawing teachers poison students minds with this arm, not wrist crap. Thats
crap. Drawing with your wrist is the ONLY way to draw. There IS NO easier way to
draw than with your wrist. I havent drawn with my wrist in at least 12 or 11 years, and
my shitty drawings made during that arm drawing period got progressively shittier,
purely because I forgot to draw sketches, and the details they contained, with my wrist.
Wrist-Drawing creates delicacy and greater texture and detail in an artists lines. I dont
really know why drawing that way is so much easier for me.
Basic Essentials of Drawing Mono:
Monos Head/Face/Hair
Swords (ruler)
Coat
Flares
Fists/Hand Anatomy

And BOOM(!), youve got Mono: The Comic Book Series Character!
Other than differing effects and panel camera angles, his construction is pretty consistent.
Horoscope Notations: Impossible to Resist. Great Business Energy. Great Power. Great
Responsibility. Looks and Charisma. I am stronger than I realize or look.

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Supposedly, my real age is 37 years, as opposed to 28 years.

Do the Math
Best places to put paid links:
YouTube Video Uploader Notes underneath video: My one got 55 paid clicks for a link
to someone elses site.
Twitter User Profile: HTTP Link space: 61 paid clicks
Total amount made on LinkBee? $0.505 supposedly

Adsense:
Sites that use Adsense: YouTube, Blogger, WCN
Best Sites for LinkBee: Twitter (61 paid clicks), YouTube (51 paid clicks):
Total LINKBEE Clicks on YouTube/Twitter: 110 paid clicks
Sites that should use something like Adsense: Twitter.
Best Ways to Make Money so far: Adsense, LinkBee

Does anyone even care about me anymore? Does anyone even care if I draw or if I dont
draw? People used to care. Now no one does. I never liked the attention. But I sort of
miss the whole everyone used to care about me thing.
People seemingly stopped caring about what I do with my time. I guess my five minutes
of fame are over.
It would definitely appears Andrew Alberts cant handle losing, even though hes a
consistent loser at life.

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Names not changed to protect the guilty (or innocent).

INTPs live in their heads, and linger on the act of solving complicated problems in their
head over long periods of time. Like most INTPs, once something is finished being
analyzed, and the project is completed in my head (consciousness, mind, psyche,
imagination), its finished, period.

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Products that are finished in my head:

End Times Webcomics
Parallax Animated Series
Parallax Anime
Parallax 600-1,000 page graphic novel
Science-Fantasy Novel
Choreographed Fight Scene
How can I make these real in reality, if in my mind, its all already complete? That is a
complex problem in and of itself. Manifesting a paper based book project into reality
when the manuscript is visualized in vivid detail in my head, but not manifest in reality.

Also, because my brain hemisphere access is equal on both sides, Im able to focus on
both the big picture, and all of its small details as well. In other words, an epic story,
vision, or landscape, and all the details, textures, and small shapes, forms, and lines that
go with it. I can design something really large in scale, then fill in all of its details, piece
by piece, as though I was constructing an entire city by myself. Manifesto is not just a
long book series. Ive filled in lots of tiny little words on each page that form a
meaningful whole on each page

Otomo-Sensei? What IS that???!! Aaron McGruder is the only one who knows what that
is. Well, other than me and CN. They all know my secret about Otomo. Its not that
strange. Steve Blum knows who I am, and hes enormous in anime. Just because famous
people pay their respects to me doesnt mean Im going to announce that to the world.
I wouldnt be as ingenious as I am if I didnt study my share of books. You can learn a lot
of books. I lost count of how many books and comic books Ive collected. I got good at
computers and inventing things by studying a computer science book I bought for an
extracurricular computer class at the charter high school I attended, a secular Academy. It
was a small school. I think the title was Computer Concepts: Beginner Level.
Something like that. It was a big extra tall, semi-thin, floppy, glossy textbook where I got
all my lingo and now-academic computer information about computer hardware and
software from. I studied that book well more than I would ever be required to. I guess I
just like computer science that much. Thats one book that Ive memorized by heart. I
didnt memorize all the data. Just the important stuff. RAM, ROM, Bits, Bytes, hertz,
monitor, JPGs, Hard Drive, Motherboards, Circuit Boards, Modems, HTTP, HTML,
Windows Media Player, uploading, downloading, screen resolution. I guess apparently
Im kind of a computer whiz, and an intuitive genius of some sort in regards to
computers. But I consider it a hobby, not mastery. I love computers and the Internet.
Theyre so fun to me. I know art, music, martial arts, literature, history, computers,
internet, philosophy, ethics, psychology, mysticism, spirituality, geography, religion,
animation, science, linguistics, technology, IT, and film.

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I see fighting illustrations, and lots of them, in my future. Im not going to boast, but
todays pinnacle drawing, Flurry of Punches felt easier to draw than it probably should.
Using stopwatches and my wrist, and the hairy line and a blue line pencil has really
made drawing difficult subject matter a much easier, less scary task for me. Its the same
amount of resistance (okay, maybe not), but I dont feel like the situation is all that
different, yet somehow I have all this energy to draw more often than usual. Maybe I
WILL be able to finish that Fat Comic Book Manuscript of Fighting after all. Maybe I
can pull off a miracle after all. I just gotta keep doing the stuff no one else is doing. Keep
drawing the subject matter other artists seem to avoid or get intimidated and frightened
off by. Like combat and martial arts.

Thursday, March 15, 2012

Novel writing style Im aiming for:
Akira meets DBZ/YuYu meets HP Lovecraft meets Tom Clancy meets Quentin
Tarantino meets Being and Nothingness by Sartre. With maybe Eugene Delacroix and
Jhonen Vasquez thrown in for good measure.

Today must be my lucky day. Finally, after 10 years of procrastination, stalling, and
waiting, for more than a decade between 2002-2012, Im reading comic books again.
Thats right. You heard me correct: IM READING COMICS. Book of choice? The one
Im reading? AKIRA VOLUME 1. And, few other artists aside, its one of the greatest
independent comic books Ive ever read. To me, truly good manga isnt even manga, it
qualifies as indie comics, because the format restrictions are the same. The only real
significant difference is not in the process used to build it, but in the demographic and the
money. Who reads it, and how much profit it earns. Manga is a popularized version of
indie comics, because more people read Japanese indies and they make more money than
normal American indies, or at least, they do now. Japanese indies borrowed things from
cinema and literature, like the epic format, lack of script dialogue, and the cinematic
camera angles for each panel, not to mention the architectural influence of French
comics.
Hemingway. Hemingways whole life was interesting and eventful enough to be a novel.
He lived as he wrote, and wrote as he lived. We should all be so lucky and blessed to
have lives that eventful and interesting. Martial Arts in entertainment can tend to be like
that, and so can music and various forms of filmmaking and literature. As for me, I think
some powerful storytellers see whats become of my life, and they see a lot there. They
see all the little unimportant details and events in ways I never really have. Especially
comedy and anime screenwriters.
Halfway Point!
Nosferatu: Dead!

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Plot Twist! Change of plans. Im changing the course of the midway adventure (the
middle) of Parallax and End Times. Maybe I can make Parallax and End Times 2
separate series. Either way, Ive decided that Nosferatu, Mono and Shadow Op 7s main
enemy and nemesis, is going to die a gruesome death, and will fall out of power as a
result of his timely demise, halfway through the series, leaving room for new problems
and complications to emerge in the plot, like the fate of Nosferatus Cursed Soul in the
Afterlife, and his potential re-incarnation into a new vessel, or his Ascension as a much
more Powerful and Intangible Free-Roaming Evil Spirit that leaves a legacy of tyranny ,
terror, and destruction in his wake.
Finished reading AKIRA Volume 1. Took me about 6 hours to finish reading from
beginning to end with no stop.

Potential themes:
Ballistics
The Supernatural
Paramilitary Forces
Heroes
Villains
Good
Evil
The Martial Arts
Existentialism
Science
Theories

Editors, agents, producers, publishers, studios, and the press, only review completed
projects. I suspect thats why mine are so obscure. None of them are finished. I dont
entirely have my act together yet. I have pieces to show, bits and pieces, but not a book.
All in due time. Itll happen. Patience grasshopper.

People who changed my life:

Rankin-Bass
John Woo
Quentin Tarantino
Tim Burton
Jhonen Vasquez
George Lucas
Steven Spielberg
Yuen Woo-Ping
Bruce Lee

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Todd McFarlane
Katsuhiro Otomo
Akira Toriyama
Moebius
Primus
Tool
Marilyn Manson
Ghost in the Shell
My Father

In one of my stories, I get to write about the underworld. Organized crime in urban areas.
And the stories are told in the form of animation screenplays and comics.
Topics
The Mob
The Mafia
Organized Crime
Mafia Fashion
The Yakuza
Triad
Sicilian Mafia
Hitmen
Goons
Thugs
Respect
Honor
Loyalty
The Italian and Sicilian Mafia
La Costa Nostra
New York City
Murder and weapons
Hits
Getting Whacked, Torture
Hookers
Snitches
Secrecy
Dead Bodies
Dead Body Storage
Blood
Guns
Uzis
Tommy Guns
The Police
The Feds

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Rats
Prohibition
Alcohol
Smuggling
Undercover agents
Spies
Surveillance
Technology
Tradition
Don
The Don
Strategy
Power
Domination
Malice
Disrespect
Violence
Revenge
Favors
Deeds
Marriage
Shootouts
Duck Tape
Dynamite
Los Angeles
Tokyo
Hong Kong
Justice
Being arrested
Rape
Misogyny
Slurs
Cursing
Accents
Racism
Clearly theres quite a bit of ground to cover with my stories. Theres no way I could fit
all mafia folklore into one of my stories. But it does leave me with a lot of lore to pick
stuff out from.
Yeah, I picked up quite a bit of jargon and lingo from watching certain gangster movies.
Its a very romanticized folklore in traditional American cinema.
Wrote Some Fiction Today:

P a g e | 335

Fuller Drive about Oliver-Es old neighborhood and the Vampire hunters in Ice
Cream Trucks that go with it & Scene Tony about racist dialogue in the mafia.
I wonder what kind of fiction Ill write in the future. Should be pretty good.
Checklist of Fiction Writing for My Style:
Necessary Components of my Daily Fiction Writing Style:

Paramilitary and Governmental Terminology

Scripture and Apocalypse Terminology
Grapes of Wrath Poetic Metaphor Terminology
Martial Arts Terminology
Philosophy and Existentialist Terminology
John Woo Tarantino Action Movie Terminology
Science-Fantasy Trope Terminology
Supernatural, Paranormal Terminology

The only way to combine these elements is to practice, and do the work. Just write. Write
events that make the use of these dozens of categorical references as much as possible.
Theres plenty of books on them individually, but no amalgamations. Ill have to think of
some writing references for myself.
Areas Im actually Mastering
(AKA The Work I AM DOING):

Dialogue for Oliver-E and Yazurai.

Backstory and description for Oliver-E
11 x 17 page layouts
Multi-limb speed line action and fighting art
Drawing hair lines with my wrist
Genre-Bending made up Science-Fantasy Terminology to sprinkle onto narratives
Reading and Pacing Narratives. Reading comics
Fiction mapping (Yazurai and Science-Fantasy Genre-Bender)

P a g e | 336

Chapter 56
(XP)

P a g e | 337

Thursday, March 15th, 2012,

Hemingway. Hemingways whole life was interesting and eventful enough to be a novel.
He lived as he wrote, and wrote as he lived. We should all be so lucky and blessed to
have lives that eventful and interesting. Martial Arts in entertainment can tend to be like
that, and so can music and various forms of filmmaking and literature. As for me, I think
some powerful storytellers see whats become of my life, and they see a lot there. They
see all the little unimportant details and events in ways I never really have. Especially
comedy and anime screenwriters.
Halfway Point!
Nosferatu: Dead!

Plot Twist! Change of plans. Im changing the course of the midway adventure (the
middle) of Parallax and End Times. Maybe I can make Parallax and End Times 2
separate series. Either way, Ive decided that Nosferatu, Mono and Shadow Op 7s main
enemy and nemesis, is going to die a gruesome death, and will fall out of power as a
result of his timely demise, halfway through the series, leaving room for new problems

P a g e | 338

and complications to emerge in the plot, like the fate of Nosferatus Cursed Soul in the
Afterlife, and his potential re-incarnation into a new vessel, or his Ascension as a much
more Powerful and Intangible Free-Roaming Evil Spirit that leaves a legacy of tyranny,
terror, and destruction in his wake.

Finished reading AKIRA Volume 1. Took me about 6 hours to finish reading from
beginning to end with no stop.
Potential themes:
Ballistics
The Supernatural
Paramilitary Forces
Heroes
Villains
Good
Evil
The Martial Arts
Existentialism
Science
Theories

Editors, agents, producers, publishers, studios, and the press, only review completed
projects. I suspect thats why mine are so obscure. None of them are finished. I dont
entirely have my act together yet. I have pieces to show, bits and pieces, but not a book.
All in due time. Itll happen. Patience grasshopper.

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People who changed my life:

Rankin-Bass
John Woo
Quentin Tarantino
Tim Burton
Jhonen Vasquez
George Lucas
Steven Spielberg
Yuen Woo-Ping
Bruce Lee
Todd McFarlane
Katsuhiro Otomo
Akira Toriyama
Moebius
Primus
Tool
Marilyn Manson
Ghost in the Shell
My Father

Friday, March 16, 2012,

In one of my stories, I get to write about the underworld. Organized crime in urban areas.
And the stories are told in the form of animation screenplays and comics.
Topics
The Mob
The Mafia
Organized Crime
Mafia Fashion

P a g e | 340

The Yakuza
Triad
Sicilian Mafia
Hitmen
Goons
Thugs
Respect
Honor
Loyalty
The Italian and Sicilian Mafia
La Costa Nostra
New York City
Murder and weapons
Hits
Getting Whacked, Torture
Hookers
Snitches
Secrecy
Dead Bodies
Dead Body Storage
Blood
Guns
Uzis
Tommy Guns
The Police
The Feds
Rats
Prohibition
Alcohol
Smuggling
Undercover agents
Spies
Surveillance
Technology
Tradition
Don
The Don
Strategy
Power
Domination
Malice
Disrespect
Violence
Revenge
Favors
Deeds

P a g e | 341

Marriage
Shootouts
Duck Tape
Dynamite
Los Angeles
Tokyo
Hong Kong
Justice
Being arrested
Rape
Misogyny
Slurs
Cursing
Accents
Racism
Clearly theres quite a bit of ground to cover with my stories. Theres no way I could fit
all mafia folklore into one of my stories. But it does leave me with a lot of lore to pick
stuff out from.
Yeah, I picked up quite a bit of jargon and lingo from watching certain gangster movies.
Its a very romanticized folklore in traditional American cinema.

Wrote Some Fiction Today:

Fuller Drive about Oliver-Es old neighborhood and the Vampire hunters in Ice
Cream Trucks that go with it & Scene Tony about racist dialogue in the mafia.
I wonder what kind of fiction Ill write in the future. Should be pretty good.
Checklist of Fiction Writing for My Style:
Necessary Components of my Daily Fiction Writing Style:

Paramilitary and Governmental Terminology

Scripture and Apocalypse Terminology
Grapes of Wrath Poetic Metaphor Terminology
Martial Arts Terminology
Philosophy and Existentialist Terminology
John Woo Tarantino Action Movie Terminology
Science-Fantasy Trope Terminology
Supernatural, Paranormal Terminology

The only way to combine these elements is to practice, and do the work. Just write. Write
events that make the use of these dozens of categorical references as much as possible.

P a g e | 342

Theres plenty of books on them individually, but no amalgamations. Ill have to think of
some writing references for myself.
Areas Im actually Mastering
(AKA The Work I AM DOING):

Dialogue for Oliver-E and Yazurai.

Backstory and description for Oliver-E
11 x 17 page layouts (Parallax, Mono)
Multi-limb speed line action and fighting art for Parallax (Mono)
Drawing hair lines with my wrist
Genre-Bending made up Science-Fantasy Terminology to sprinkle onto narratives
Reading and Pacing Narratives. Reading comics
Fiction mapping (Yazurai and Science-Fantasy Genre-Bender)

Sometimes I get tired and dont want to continue working. But its tough to be at rest
once Ive gotten a taste of the velocity and motion of my workload.
2 Main development properties: Parallax, Oliver-E.
Ones on the backburner: Dream Lords. Yazurai. In The Realm of the Heavens

Saturday, March 17, 2012

Im doing exactly what I need to do to progress and finish my tasks. Im writing both
dialogue and description, in both Parallax and Oliver. Now I just need to keep it up, and
continue doing what I was doing, and Ill be just fine.
Topics of Discussion for the day (art):

The Composition-Related Overlap

The OTS (Over the Shoulder) Camera Shot

New Skills:

Dialogue
Description
Over the Shoulder Shot
Speed Line Strikes

Practice the heck out of these.

Its not just me or certain things in pop culture that suck now and used to be cooler.
EVERYTHING in pop culturecomics, manga, music, TV, movies, animation, radio

P a g e | 343

used to be cooler 20 years ago. Everything except online video and regular books. Thats
about it.
Things change. Things decline over time. Like all the industries I wanted to work in. So I
think its only natural if I ask myself if by the time Ive done my job, finished my
projects, and am ready to jump in there (sometimes in the future) will the industry even
be worth working in or selling a project in. Well my concepts are good, but would the
poor execution style of the current generation make a jumbled, unappealing mess of my
perfect comic and perfect script and pitch bible? Would the style and vision of my
inspiration from the pass be murdered by the poor execution and performance of the
present and future. Not if Im working on the best action and superstar projects.
Social Life
I like women, sex, flirting with women, and fantasizing about traveling and living abroad,
in Eurasia. And when Im not doing that, Im eating unhealthy but sweet food, talking to
friends. I like surfing the internet, research, and watching videos on Roku, DVR, and
YouTube. I also like relaxing and lying down. Lounging pretty much.
Tools For Winning The War on Comic Book-ism:

Drawing With Wrist

Over the Shoulder Shot
Speedline Combat
Outlines and Scenes
Dialogue
Description

No doubt about it, I want to pursue fiction writing on a daily schedule. Very few goals
happen and succeed at being accomplished by chance. Meaning if I really do want to
write more fiction, I need to stop talking about it in a future tense, change it to a present
tense. The hardest part is getting started. Starting is the hardest element of the fiction
writing and screenwriting process.
Using the write kind of inquiry-based fiction writing prompts definitely helps with the
aspect of me thinking of fiction topics to write about. Everything in fiction is
hypothetical, so its got that detached feeling.
I remember when I was 13 and 17, those were two of my most lucrative years, at least in
terms of coming up with story and plot ideas, even if they all were just for Zounds!
Doesnt matter, a story is a story. I would go through entire months just thinking up what
on some level seemed simply like story idea after story idea. Productivity. I wonder if I
still have those papers somewhere.

P a g e | 344

I wonder if Ill ever be make peace with just being a writer. A real writer...Not a writer
and artist.
Epics can be anywhere from 140 pages (like JtHM) to 530 (like Dragonball graphic
novels) pages in length. Something tells me it will be a struggle just to survive while
reaching the low end of that estimate. Im okay with this. Well, more okay with it than I
was anyway. Length doesnt determine respectability or popularity. No it most certainly
does not. Okay, maybe it SORT OF wins some critics over, but it doesnt win you any
extra fans. Actually most of the comics on the Amazon bestseller lists are short thin
books, not long fat ones.
Created my first 22-page script thats actually formatted. 1 Episodes worth of content.
Plus: Its a TV-Episode-Length Formatted Script. Its physically structured the right way.
Detractors: Its nonsense. The dialogue and story are random, fragmented, dont fit
together, and dont form a cohesive whole.
Out of those 22 script pages I wrote, only about 3 of themand a couple others
actually told a coherent narrative involving description and dialogue, related to the
existing universe I created, that actually went somewhere. Less than 15% of the material I
produced is useable in a profitable context, which is an improvement, yet it also serves to
remind me that Im nonetheless improving, but the rate of improvement is probably going
to be long, monthly, drawn out, and slow to emerge, just as Manifesto was in the
beginning as well, when I first started writing nonfiction, and made the unwise decision
in the beginning of not balancing the nonfiction with fictional writing to go with it. But
thats the past. Its not like I can go back in time and advise myself in yesterday. I just
have to be a diligent screenwriter today, like I have been.

Monday, March 19, 2012,

Im considering getting a copyright and maybe also a trademark on Parallax and my
character Mono and his likeness and the likeness of his world. That way I can put an
end to all the copyright violation.

My plot department and committee is strong

But my supporting character development department and committee is weak so

far, due to overemphasizing the protagonist and ignoring the rest of the supporting
cast.

Im going to change that. Ill rectify this problem, soon enough.

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New self-assignment: Fitting script dialogue to comic book layouts and pages. Use the
same image every panel, if you have to. Whatever it takes, just practice and make that
comics dialogue happen. Im starting to, but Ive really only seen the tip of the iceberg.
Brilliant, but Doomed I live by those words.
Thats the great thing about Literature (Novels) and Cinema on Paper (Comics). You
have the freedom to be a genius and not a mainstream moron. You can be as Detail,
Density, Complexity, Length, and Depth Heavy as you want them to be. In literature,
youre only limited by your schedule, talent, skill, lifestyle, and imagination. With TV
and movies, youre working under a lot of conformity and restriction.
Word Metaphors for producing dense projects: Snowball effect, Castle of Words, Ocean
of Words, Planet of Words, Tsunami of Words, Wall of Text, Bible, Grandmaster, God,
Brahman, One Man Army, One Man Team, Epic, Saga, Mythos, Mythology, Franchise,
Factory of Words, Labyrinthine.
Things to do less of: Draw comics page layouts.
Work on dialogue and over the shoulder shots instead.
Things to do more of: Screenwriting, Outlines, Character Development, Writing a novel.
Some people really, REALLY hate me. Lotta people seem to be hoping Ill never get my
own show to begin with. At least Im aware of that element of opposition now. Thats
definitely a load off. In the beginning when no one knew me or opposed anything I did
because they had never heard of me, I might have been able to get my own show. Now
with all the hatred and people disgusted by the idea of me having my own show, I see no
reason to linger there or waste my time on it anymore. Id rather publish a book 2 of my
friends read, but that only sells 2 copies, than a show with high ratings, FUELED by
people who are hating on me and hoping my show and I will fail. Its pretty useless to
stay determined to get a show when that many people dont want you to have one to
begin with. Kind of simplifies things. If a lot of people dont want Parallax to happen,
Im not going to butt heads with such people. Screw that. Im bailing.
Success in comics is one, 1 page, 1 panel at a time. No shortcuts. The problem with me is
Im impatient. Im always trying to find ways to cut corners, and it sucks when I do that.
I dont have my crap together half the time, unfortunately. Not even going to bother to
lie.
Id step up to be more of a leader to society, but for the first time in my life, Im just lost.
Im lost, man. I dont know what to do or where to do. I have nothing to do and nowhere
to go. Ive got a place to live and time on my hands and I dont have to do conventional
work. No ones forcing me into a relationship or job. Im lost! Somebody guide me. Phil
used to be m guide. So did my parents. Then they suddenly started seeming less
insightful to me for some reason. Its like I dont have any direction in my life anymore.

P a g e | 346

Work used to be the only thing that brought my life excitement and meaning. That and
anime. Then they all became popular, and that stopped happening. And now that I know
theres people lobbying against me achieving my No. 1 creative goal, Im REALLY lost.

Tuesday, March 20, 2012,

I have story ideas.
I have my main cast.
I have scripts.
I have comic page layouts
I have backgrounds
I dont have many smaller character roles in the story developed.

Ive decided Hard Work is the Fastest Road to Power. Hard work tends to bring us all the
things we want in life: Money, respect, success, influence, fame, relationships,
employment, a future, prosperity. Or at the very least, it brings us closer to it.
About my art and writing: Damn, I do produce a lot of it, whole stacks, scripts, and
bound manuscripts. But the majority of it has no meaning or real format, and thats where
I got lost. I was producing a lot of material, but it had no narrative meaning. I wasnt
going anywhere with it, and Im putting in a bit more effort to add more meaning to my
work, make it meaningful and narrative, and structure it a bit more. Ive gotten rid of a
LOT of poorly done comic book layouts and sketchbook pages. All my bad work in other
words. The best thing one can do is to throw away the really bad stuffor scrap it
and figure out how to keep producing the good stuff. I have a high page count production
rate overall if I count the hundreds and hundreds of pages Ive scrapped. My success rate
of successfully executed pages is actually pretty low when compared to how much work
Ive actually put in to my sessions.

Wednesday, March 21, 2012,

Two people who wanted to talk to me visited me at my house today. Chris Hess, my old
childhood friend, and some guy interested in hiring me for something. Apparently that
second guy taking survey questions thought I was good enough to hire. I LOVE getting
job offers. But I didnt take the job. Im pretty sure I wouldnt be able to do a job of that
type, maybe some other time. But I appreciate the thought. At least someone thinks Im
employable.
I just found an otaku blog through Twitter, with a very, very useful comment by a
blogger referring to him or her self simply as Dumb Otaku:

P a g e | 347

There are many sayings and most have some truth to them, but none, to me, are as
powerful as this one.
Consistent action over a long period of time leads to amazing results.
I am not sure I am even saying it completely or where I heard it. However, that is the
saying I remember. What it means to me is:
Consistently doing small things over a long period of time leads to something big.
Philosophically speaking, I find that kind of motto appealing. I should apply that to my
creative work. Clearly that Otaku is not so dumb.
Friday, March 23, 2012,
So last night, after I wrote the paragraph above, in an angry stupor, I cranked out this, to
cement my place as a comic book artist and cartoonist.NOT an animator!

P a g e | 348

This comic book illustration is headed in the right direction. I actually used some
planning for this page, but looking back, the day after I drew it that night, I cant help but
wonder which component I started with: Script/Dialogue highlights, or Monos face and
collar. Honestly, I dont remember which one I drew first. I was in such a zealous and
passionate mood, it was hard to focus on my process, and not my general anger toward
my parents and typical TV animation. Ill have to study the pages of Blacksad more
often. Blacksad reminds me of how cool my own character, Mono is. There are
similarities, but I dont view that as bad, considering John Blacksad and Mono Jubei are
equal parts trenchcoat wearing badass.
I guess I didnt realize how masculine my storytelling style was. There arent a lot of
female characters in my comics world so far. A few, but not a lot, and theyre all full
grown adults.
Why arent individual digital comic book individual issues available through Amazon,
instead of just being sold in printed, vintage format.

Good Retailers
Borders
Books-A-Million
Barnes & Noble
Amazon
Comic Book Shops (some)
Publishers
Dark Horse
Oni Press
Slave Labor Graphics
Tokyopop
Viz
Seven Seas
Yen Press
HarperCollins
Simon & Schuster
Lulu
Amazon
CreateSpace
These are the venues I buy from

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Digital Venues Im Sure About

Amazon
Google
YouTube
Hulu
Netflix
Crunchy Roll
Roku
DVR
Twitter
Digital venues Im not so sure about
Webcomics Nation
Comixology
Graphic.ly
MySpace
Facebook
I sense a lack of direction in these businesses. How do they expect to sell anything and
make a profit if their customer payment data entry pages dont even work??!! Goddamn
this makes me mad! Cant they at least not totally embarrass themselves by being
completely inferior and defective in comparison to REAL online businesses like Amazon
and Google??? Whats so complicated about this? I want to give Comixology and
Graphic.ly my business and buy comics from them. So why wont they let me??!!! God.
Why do distributors make ordering things online so hard half the time. Theyre risking
the loss of MY business, and as a result, scarily enough, everyone elses business.
I drew my 2nd actual decent comic book page today. Well, tonight actually. Nothing like a
little nighttime sequential art creation. I dont know if Ill publish all my comics pages on
my blog. Ill definitely scan them though.
I wrote and talked for at LEAST 10 years straight, or an entire decade, if not a lot more
time than thatabout making comics and Wanting to make comics, when all I was
really doing was sketching unfinished slop work, and writing journals that had no
narrative. At the most I was designing Mono a lot and maybe a background here and
there. At the least, I was being fatigued, blocked, egotistical, megalomaniacal, and
mindlessly self-indulgent and out of shape. Im glad that phase is behind me, and Ive
reached the Just Do It Stage of my storytelling Journey. The bottom line is, talking and
pontificating to your friends and family about your passion for drawing all day wont do
you any good. Ultimately youll either force yourself or develop a technique to get
yourself started on working, or you wont. I know not everyone agrees with my methods,
but they work for me, and at the end of the day, if I can get MYSELF working, that will
inspire countless others, both now and in the future, and cause a chain reaction of people
working very hard on projects worldwide. No one tells me directly, but the timing of

P a g e | 350

these events of people being inspired by me and channeling what they perceive of my
own inspiration into their own work, speaks volumes for us all! I dont have to worry
about starting a revolution or leading a generation. If YOU truly do take the initiative and
be proactive, the revolution of high energy on MANY artists and writers and creators
parts, both famous and non, takes care of itself! This is powerful stuff were talking
about. I can exert a LOT of energy and force through YouTube, Twitter, and Parallax
comics alone.
The REAL look of my comics pages is finally taking shape. Now I can get a gage on
exactly how my pages are shaping up. Very nicely if I do say so myself. Theyre certainly
becoming detailed enough ever since I started drawings my comics on Strathmore
Drawing Paper again.

Saturday, March 24, 2012

Assuming
A) You dont put too much fretting, stress, or thought into it in terms of psyching
yourself out.
B) You put a considerable amount of daily and nightly strategic planning into your
drawing process of each page every day before you draw each page.
C) You know what youre going to draw, and you have a good idea of what your
panel of focus will be
Drawing comic pages on daily basis is and can be just as easy as writing journal pages on
a daily basis. The same can be said for fiction writing too.
Anythings easy if you plan, prepare, diligently force yourself in the beginning, and set
your mind to it.

Storyboard discussion:
National Styles:
American:
Comedy: Gestures
Action-Adventure: Thumbnails
France & Japan:
Anime/Franime Thumbnails and Illustrations

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Drawing panels is actually quite a bit of fun, once you actually really put some effort into
it. Storyboard and Panels is one of my favorite parts of my job.
Yay! I bought my first digital comic today: Beyond the Fringe 5A, written by Jhonen and
drawn by Becky Cloonan. Very punk rock of me. But now I want to buy more comics
online. Im starting to like the idea of having a digital collection available on any
computer I access, through the internet. Its an intoxicating idea, to say the least. I could
easily become addicted to this new form of comics collecting. Ive got some publishers I
still want to buy from: Dark Horse, DC, Marvel, SLG, Oni, Viz, Yen Press. Not
Tokyopop anymore, seeing as they went out of business. Ive become so out of touch
with the current state of comics books. Greg Capullo is pencilling Batman for now, I
definitely want to check that one out. And I eventually want to get re-acquainted with
Neon Genesis Evangelion and Blade of the Immortal. Spawns in a sorry state, but
hopefully its TV show will make an impact. I dont enjoy watching Todd McFarlane fail
at anything really. Especially not making the Spawn comics.
Values that are important to me:

Empathy
Compassion
Diligence
Discipline
Focus
Selflessness
Creativity
Imagination
Patience
Gratitude
Industriousness
Tolerance
Productivity
Fortitude
Integrity
Honesty
Courage
Bravery
Newly learned:
Improvisation shapes creativity
Addiction shapes brands, value, monopoly, and profits.
The further I get away from making the effort with drawing comics and practice comics,
the more and more depressed and fatigued I get. Its unfortunate it works that way, but

P a g e | 352

the only times I was the most depressed was when I was blocked the most. As an artist,
the ability to express myself
Self-expression is linked to my mental health.
Self-Expression and the Mental Health of a Creative Person

Parallax is exactly what it should be: A story idea that I can adapt to any storytelling
medium: Comics, TV Animation, Live Action Theatrical Release, Video Games, and
Novels. But let me emphasize, its a story.

Monday, March 26, 2012,

Im meek, anxiety-stricken, and phobic in person, but Im quite bold on the page and
computer monitor. I dont know why this is.
American and French Manga-Ka generally arent as admired in America or Japan, the
Manga Capitals, as their Japanese peers. I know this firsthand from being one of the
former groups of creators. I approach creative work like my tech R&D and
Manufacturing Work. Im just as influenced by Akio Morita, Steve Jobs, Bill Gates,
Sony, Microsoft, and IBM as I am influenced by Walt Disney, George Lucas, Steven
Spielberg, Windsor McCay, Jean Giraud Moebius, Katsuhiro Otomo, and Osamu Tezuka.
To me, animation and comics is just a branded version of product manufacturing. You
invent or create something, and you mass copy and mass produce it. The only big
difference is in the form, design, and concept.

Okay, so I finished 3 completed comic book pages so far. Only 17 to go. But I have 8
pages ready to be adapted into comics pages. So do the math: 17 8 = 9. After I complete
the adaptation of the remaining script Ive accumulated so far 8, since by then, if I have
11 pages finished, Ill be halfway done to completing 1 issue! My first polished issue that
actually tells a halfway coherent story! I know Im selling this like MC Bat Commander,
but thats part of the charm! Heh heh.

Even in times of being lost and hopeless, like I was a few days ago, theres still hope for
me. I still have something Im working toward, despite all the rumors and scandal and
controversy, and scrutiny/criticism/discussion.
The Hope and Faith in Completion
Hope of Finishing
Hope of Completing Project & Product
Hope of Arrival

P a g e | 353

The End Game is Completing a Project, ANY Project, that has a story.
First will be the project of 1 comic book panel, then 1 Comic Book Page, then the
Multiple Pages, Then the 20 page Issue 1. Then Issue 2 pg. 1. Then Issue 2, Pg. 2.
Step-By-Step Process. It will require and take time, patience, and diligence to finish. To
reach fruition and completion.
That 20 pg issue Ive been working on, so far has grown into a 15 page issue:
Its:
3 Pages of an investigation scene
2 Pages of Dialogue and Exposition
7 Pages of Sword Fighting
1 Page of Handguns Aiming & Firing
2 Pages of Backgrounds, Cities, and Architecture
Actually, I think I have enough. At the end of next month, Ill have enough money to
self-publish that minicomic
Note to self, dont let those TV Jokers distract me from my main mission, which is to
finish my publishing manuscript projects. The Manuscript Publishing Projects have been
started. Its only a matter of timemonths or yearsbefore theyre completed, a done
deal, and finished. Dont get distracted by all the trashy garbage online and on TV. I still
have a job to do, no matter HOW nightmarish or horrible or hauntingly traumatic reality
comes. Theres still technically something I can do to change all that. And there always
will be: Draw. And Write.
When it comes to work and comics, I dont have to be happy or find world peace, or even
like my peers, which I dont. I just have to finish the book and sooner or later work up to
having a product manifested, polished, and completed eventually.
Im applying a disciplined drawing and production process. And I use Rational thought to
achieve my career goals
If I ever feel hopeless, I need to remember my ultimate goal: The minicomic Im
finishing up and am going to eventually publish through Lulu. That issue and sequel
issues.
My minicomic now has a name: End Times 2.0 It will be a 15 or more page one-shot. I
know 2 of the older pages have been used to death, but thats okay. Until I create more
like them, theyre all I have. Im publishing it JtHM style, like an extended comic strip
instead of like Blade of the Immortal or I Feel Sick. The long continuous story format is
something you work up to. Its not something you start off doing unless youre really,
really good.

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Tuesday, March 27th, 2012,

So the question remains, who is Mono Jubei based on (other than myself)?
Thats simple: My brother, Andrew, on various things: Seto Kaiabas costume and
attitude, Bruce Lee, Arnold Schwarzenegger, Brad Pitt, Neo, Spike Spiegel, Dracula,
Spawn, Vash the Stampede, Cerebus the Aardvark, Marv of Sin City, Johnny the
Homicidal Maniacany character whos rugged, handsome, and/or on the edge in some
way. And tough.

The Richest People in Comics and Animation

Anyone? Anyone?
Seth MacFarlane
Matt Groening
George Lucas
Jhonen?
Aaron McGruder?
Katsuhiro Otomo?
John Lasseter
Hayao Miyazaki
Bruce Timm?
Todd McFarlane
Actually making money from comics and animation is rare and difficult to attain. Getting
obscenely rich? Even more so.

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Chapter 57
(XP)

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Tuesday, March 27th, 2012

Wireless External Optical DVD-Disc Drive

Im in love with computers and how they function and integrate with media, integration,
and audio-video playback
Came up with a new idea. Wireless DVR Ripper Storage Drive. This device doesnt exist
yet, because I invented the function of it in my mind, but it certainly should exist
Functions of Tech:
Uploading
Downloading
Ripping
Audio Playback
Video Playback
Streaming Video Playback
Digital Signal Conversion
Signal Recording
DVD Authoring
(Cont.)
DVD Recording
CD Recording
MP3 Player
DVR (Digital Video Recorder)
HDMI Cable Signal
Remote Wireless Signal Transmission

Selling Points of My Work:

Elaborately choreographed, complex and well executed fight sequences and scenes,
in cinema, have an enormous amount of showbusiness market value. Same thing with my
trenchcoats, and shootouts, the noir look, production design, good timing-and-pacing
and dialogue. Those areas of my work may as well be made of gold, because theyre
paving me a goldbrick road.
Books I Read As Though They Were the Bible:

Animation Magazine 20 Year Anniversary Issue

Understanding Comics by Scott McCloud
Please Understand Me II by David Keirsey
The Now Habit: Overcoming Procrastination
Johnny The Homicidal Maniac: Directors Cut by Jhonen Vasquez

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Akira Club by Katsuhiro Otomo

Akira Volume 1 by Katsuhiro Otomo
The Brand Called You
The Art of Oban Star Racers
Batman: Animated
I Feel Sick by Jhonen Vasquez
One Taste: Daily Reflections on Integral Spirituality by Ken Wilber
Essential Writings of Edgar Allen Poe
The Artists Way by Julia Cameron
Understanding Movies
Computer Concepts (Beginner Edition)
Producing Animation by Catherine Winder
A Complete History of Animation by
Enchanted Drawings: The History of Animation by Charles Solomon
The Leonard Maltin Movie Guide

About 22:
Heres a quote:
Many who have left a permanent stamp on humanityinventors, Nobel Prize winners,
leading artists, and statesmenhave had the 22 prominent in their charts.

Wednesday, March 28, 2012

The impact of an innovation depends on how much they influence other artistshence,
the more widespread the adoption of an innovation, the more important its creator.
If thats the case, I must be pretty important:

YouTube
YouTube Anime
Trenchcoat
Sword
Mature Action
Speculative Fiction
Apocalypse Fiction
Indie Broadcasting
Indie Media
Manga
American Manga
Comic Book and Graphic Novel

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Design
Screenwriting
Animation and Anime Production
Co-Production

With the current generation of artists and experimenters, this doesnt happen so much on
a conscious level anymore, but many of the Great Masters of Western Art were also
Great Experimenters. Genius of Variety, not just Innovation and Structural Aesthetics.
Great Painters of the Mid-20th Century and Earlier led lives that could be defined by
stages, series, and periods. Like Picassos Blue Period, being one of the most famous.
True Innovators in Western Art tend to go through phases and series and periods
So it got me thinking, maybe I should give due consideration to the periods and phases of
my own life. What about ME, and the movements I started?
Periods of MY lifeAchievements, Phases, & Periods

Expressionism, Cyber-Expressionism (Gothicism, Babel) (2002-2004)

Rima Jabbur Charcoal and Pencil Class (Woman in Gown) (2001)
AnimeTV Review Writing Period
Brief Collaboration with Steve Blum
Brian Johnston Guerilla Warfare Period
Nicole/Art Institute Period
Neighbor Animosity-Rivals, Schizophrenia, Voices
Notan and Neo-Noir Period (Cover Illustrations for Parallax and End Times)
YouTube Victory and Success Period
Gorillaz Clint Eastwood Period
Production Design, Screenwriting, and Storyboard Storyteller Period
Web 2.0 Period
Fame Period 2002-2012
Stay in Psyche Ward Period
CN, Toonami, Cartoon Network, Jetix, and Adult Swim Period
Parallax Development Period (Story, Design, Backgrounds, Characters)
Mono Character Design Period
Computer Paper Period
Inventor & Patent Period
Home Electronics and DVD Period
Bad, Very Bad TV, Music, and Movies (by other people) period
Viacom Rivalry
Lessons With Phil Period
Manifesto Manuscript Period
French and Franco-Belgian Comics Period

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Tokyopop Period
Manifesto Writing Period
DeviantART Period
Andrew Roommate and Jinnel / In-Laws Period
Martial Arts, Fight Choreography, Hong Kong, Wuxia, Chanbara Period
Swords, Guns, and Dual Wielding Swordsman Period
Hacker Spy, Mole, and Accusations-From-Others Period
Media-and-Fans-Stalking-Me Period
Southeast Hurricane Period
Twitter and Egypt and Barack Obama Period
Searching for Birth Parents Period
Mainstream media rips me off, plagiarizes, copies me w/out crediting me period
Famous Face and Likeness Tabloid White Trash Clown Period

Book Series:
Currently, if I dont count Cerebus, my two favorite book series of the momentare
AKIRA and the Elric Saga. The two are very different in nature, form, execution, theme,
method, and style, but they share the same power to leave nearly any reader of fantasy
and science fiction in awe of the Testament and Wonder theyve created in the literary
and/or cinematic world. These books are filled with power, imagination, and visual
elements. And theyre not easy to imitate. Actually, theyre downright difficult to imitate
and copy (from). Elric is a fantasy equation, and AKIRA is the worlds most epic cinema
or movie, trapped in a book, of both the illustrative and comic variety.
But then upon looking at my copies of each volume of what is many volumes of these
series sitting on my shelf quietly, I received a brilliant idea. What would happen if
someone combined these two series style? When I think of my favorite books, like these
epic fantasy and fantastical book series, certain key words often come to mind, in terms
of helping and aiding me in summarizing the style, to make its essence easier to
incorporate into my own original work that in many ways is unrelated, at least in terms of
authorship. But just as paintings have dominant colors, books in generaland
especially book seriescan have a dominant motif, theme, symbol, or iconic element.

With Elric, its Black, Chivalry, Magic, and Swords.

With the Mighty AKIRA, it is Red, Architecture, Action, and Destruction.

There are many topics and subject matter addressed by these books, which I am leaving
out, but few of them dominate on every page the way those primary Themes do to me,
whether its on a literary story level, or a visual cinematic narrative level.
Enter the Hollywood Pitch Meeting technique. I approach adaptation of these authors
styles in my own interpretation of their work as perhaps an executive or screenwriter
would approach selling the formation of his movie, as in Its Jurassic Park meets Pulp
Fiction. That last concept wouldnt work in reality without making something really
really bad. But were talking about something that, based on box office figures alone,

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would be really, really easy to sell if its source of influence and inspiration is any
indicator, so you get the point.
So therefore, What would happen if AKIRA met Elric? Its my job to build upon this
nucleus of a concept, and add onto it and build it and build a world around it until the
manifestation of this new-mythos is well underway. Thats the fun part: The exploration,
experimentation, research, and development of Building the book that explores this
original stylistic innovation.
Manga-Ka America. While the art in and of itself is beautiful on many accounts,
ultimately its primarily just that: Illustrations, and not manga. All the artists featured in
Manga-Ka America are working, paid, published manga artists who have all drawn
sequential art. Yet there is a total of less than 15-20 pages of actual real live authentic
sequential art pages in the entire book, if that. Is that really the message we want to send
to you aspiring artists who want to draw manga in the future? That its okay for you to
get more famous from your face and illustrative art pieces than by actually having any
REAL actual comics and sequential art pieces to show? Is the McFarlane and Bruce
Timm story approach to comic books going out of style? I guess Im just saying I wished
Manga-Ka America lived up to the Manga or Comics word in its title more. Half
those creators got fired by Tokyopop after it went out of business, technically speaking.
Thats unfortunate for them, but shouldnt former Tokyopop creators all seek NEW
publishers so well have more stuff to read?
Let me explain why signing a contract, for ANYTHING, would be a bad thing for me at
this point in my career. A Non-disclosure agreement for anything other than one of my
inventions would make it impossible to continue doing what Ive been doing online,
which is shoot my mouth off, and post my opinions about things. Just talk. When youre
under a non-disclosure agreement, its technically a violation of contract to talk about
anything you make money from that isnt an invention made by an inventor (i.e. me).
And my non-disclosure freelance patent agreement I signed with my patent attorney last
year when I was in the midst of negotiating my potential terms, was just as airtight. But I
never talked about it at the time, just as my contractual obligation required of me said to
do. I did my job.

In my opinion, Speculative Fiction is one of the most challenging, hardest, and most
rewarding forms of fiction there is, whether its White or Black or Somewhere in the
Middle. I know Speculative Fiction is the right kind of writing for me, as Ive already
written a little bit of it in the past, so Im not short on concepts. Im good at story
concepts and character development. Its the narrative formation and construction, the
application of words and nouns and verbs and descriptions and their integration that I find
challenging. Not saying I have writers block, because I dont. Im writing right now. Just
not in the right format. But hey, I got to write something. Got to keep my literary writing
chops up.

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There are a few areas Ive mastered with my expertise.

General writing, word flow, sentence and paragraph construction, English,

Grammar
Sketching and thumbnails. Character design and conceptual design.
Fine Art Portraiture and Pencil Anatomical and portraiture studies
Problem solving
Running a Website
Computer Science
Research

I have the power to talkto cats. I talk to my pet cats all the time. Cats really arent all
that talkative. Mostly they just sleep and beg to be let out of a room, or for food.
March 2012: The year and month I finally found a way to circumvent my
counterproductive habitually detrimental emotional behavior. Thats a monumental
achievement for me. No longer am I hypnotized by my emotions. I found a way to kill
that influence once and for all. I dont know if I should admit this, but if my suspicions
are correct, Ive found a cure for my problem. And I created the solution myself by
strategizing against it, when it does MANIFEST, through whoever does attempt to
manifest it.

I had a Korean friend in high school who always used to have me take Korean fortune
telling tests for fun. I always drew islands over an ocean. Supposedly the water
symbolized having a LOT of money.
Humiliation
Outcast and Infamy Stature
Black Sheep of my Family
Unemployment
Everyone Hating Me
Everyone Being Against Me
Bankruptcy and Poverty
Failure
Difficulty Finishing my Art
Difficulty Finishing my Books, Comics, and Scripts
I get it!
This is a Divine Test, with rewards at the other end unimaginable. Im suffering in
sequence for a reason, and that reason is to get to the prize of immortality and power and
money at the other end. God isnt punishing me. Hes Testing Me. And the Light Shines
Down Onto Thy Eyes, and Thee can Visualize Thy Goal, and How, One Day, I WILL
Achieve That Goal: Godlike Success and a Page in History, with Rewards Unimaginable.

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But nowhere anytime soon though. Still got a while to go for that. An eternity of Waiting
in Limbo.

Must be a pretty difficult challenge for a Trappistine monk to have a son, like my (birth)
father did. Glenis was an automotive manufacturer of some variety and a Trappistine
monk at some point.
Yes, technically I am part Mongolian, and technically Im also part French and Brit, and
technically Im the son of a Trappistine monk and automotive manufacturer from Ann
Arbor and some other places. Its odd being the son of a religions authority figure in
reality. It makes me confused about what is the appropriate way to act when this is the
truth about my life. Should I act like white trash because I live in Central Florida, like so
many here do, or should I act dignified, like a true Son of a Holy Man.
I dont know whether Im a genius at animation production theory and execution, or just
plain terrible at it. I show signs of both. God. Studying the managerial organization and
strategy chapters isnt like learning computer science or English. Its so much more
advanced and hard. TV shows make all this organizational work look way too easy. How
can animation creators in America be so humorous and carefree when they have to do
organizational and strategic management like this crap? Its like running into a brick wall
(of insider knowledge and text). I hate it! Im good with chaos and being disheveled. Not
so good at leading a strategic team and managerial operation with tactics, a work
schedule, strategy, and budget behind it. Yes, this creative managerial stuff is what Ive
wanted to do all my life. But its so overwhelming, difficult, stressful, and just plain hard.
And yet traditional television animation production is to me what Propane and Propane
Accessories are to Hank Hill, or what cleaning is to my adoptive mom, or what Pharmacy
is to my adoptive dad. It runs in our blood. Its all I can think about: Drawing comics
trades, and managing an animation team, even if its only a 1-man team. Man, adulthood
sure is stressful.

Complexity Analysis and Project Budgeting:

Upon further analysis of my pre-production work (script, conceptual artwork), it would
be hard to do a show like Parallax, successfully, in what would apparently be a typical
Adult Swim Original Show Budget. Adult Swim typically doesnt spend more than
$500,000-$700,000 on a single show. Their scope is limited, hence the cheap feel of their
original shows. Their own shows (not anime) feel like they look: Cheap and under a
million dollar budget. Networks like FOX and Cartoon Network and MTV work with
Million Dollar Range Budgets, hence making it easier to have high production values.
Their shows may LOOK mostly simple, but their cost is anything BUT simple. One
episode of Family Guy could fund 5 seasons of IGPX or Big O!
If youre going to do an action show, youre going to require a lot more than a Six-Figure
Budget. You need a Seven Figure Budgetdefinitely. High Concept Action Shows

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always do have big budgets. Thats the nature of the industry. You cant do a show like
Thundercats or Avatar the Last Airbender or Teen Titans on a budget of under seven
figures.

Skills to continue trying out:

Scenes
Outlines (script, novel, comics)
Thumbnails
Screenwriting
Description
Dialogue
Blue Line Pencil Sketch
Stop Watch
Notan Inks
Action Poses
Sword Poses
Trenchcoat
Perspective
Cities
Pen and Ink

Im going to need to make my work subjects more engaging, so I can be tempted to spend
more time on them. Also, writing a book, writing a comics/movie/TVAnimation
screenplay is and finishing a project will be the ultimate lesson in how to write those sorts
of things. The best teacher is experience. Doing something is the best way to learn how to
do it.
How do you write a novel?
How do you draw a comic book page?
How do you write a comics/animation script?
Answer: You just do it. You write it, start writing, continue writing, and finish writing.
Before you know it, you know how to write all those things, and maybe even a little
more.
If you round it off, Ive written roughly around 3,500 pages of journals. Divided by 1
400-page books. Ive done enough writing to fill 9 books that were 400 pages each, or if
they were 200 page books, then Id have written 16 books that were 200 pages each. But
lets go with the 400 page rendition. So technically, Ive written 9 books already, each of
them being 400 pages long.

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So Ive finished 9 books. I already know how to write a book. Just sit that ass down, tap
on the keyboard repeatedly, and just keep cranking out letters that turn into sentences,
that turn into paragraphs, that turn into pages, that turn into chapters, that eventually turn
into a book. Thats the method I used to write those 9 random 400-page-long books.
But heres the puzzle to solve:
How do I keep my hands typing, and the keyboard active and in use even when theyre
blank fiction pages to be written, and not get writers block for my fiction description,
dialogue, and outlines. Its like a water system that gets shut off. Every time I try to water
the plant of fabrication and fiction and fantasy, my water gets shut off. Its like there is
some kind of higher force trying to make my hands freeze up (The Resistance) whenever
I try to write fiction, novels, and scripts, and draw comic book pages and sketchbook
pages. I suppose I could write a story about that very subject. Hands freezing up
whenever you even try to type one letter of fiction.

Its Friday. This day sponsored by: 5-Hour Energy.

Got 2 1-page short stories of fiction written this evening when I was home alone, one
general fiction (Short Story), and the other being a High Fantasy short story (A story
based on a mix between Tolkien Mythology and Arthurian Legend).
Cred: They kind of have credibility, and they kind of DONT also.
That describes probably just about EVERYBODY working in showbusiness. Every
successful entertainer and media figure whos successful in any way, generally doesnt
have credibility everywhere (no one is loved by all people), but rather, some people have
credibility some places, yet no credibility in others.
For example:
Seth MacFArlane: Does he make more money than hell? Yes. Has he been on Inside the
Actors Studio, and the Emmys? Yep. Do his shows have a viewership. Does he have a
Wikipedia page? Yep. Could he ever write a successful NOVEL? Doubt it. Could he ever
make an actual anime, or have ANY respect from me or an anime fan of most sorts? No
way in HELL.
Cartoon Network: Does it have tons of viewers? Yes. Does it have a religious cult
following among its fans online? Yes Does it have anime credibility anymore? Open to
debate. Certainly not as much as it used to.
Musashi Kishimoto and Eichiro Oda: Are they rich? Yes. Do they have internet fans the
world over, and more fan devotion than most creators? Yes. Do their shows succeed in
America as much as Family Guy? I like them a lot better than family guy, but then again,
who am I anyway. It really depends on who you ask

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So yeah, now a days, it truly is hard to have your cake and eat it too, even when youre
on the very top of the food chain. Never forget that. Go where the love is.
Toonami Shows With Swordsman Protagonists
Thundercats
Rurouni Kenshin
Samurai Jack
Tenchi Muyo
Adult Swim Shows With Swordsman Protagonists
Bleach
Samurai Champloo
Reign The Conqueror
Star Wars: The Clone Wars

Im like Pixar and Adult Swim / Cartoon Network. For the most part, I dont endorse
outsourcing in animation. The only reason America plays any anime on American TV in
the first place is because its to ignorant to learn how to make its own cinematic and
literary animation of that variety of its own. Apparently, American producers are too
ignorant to figure out how an anime or manga could be made in America. Well,
American manga more closely resembles Japanese products than American anime does.
Unless its French like what I do, in which case the resemblance is uncanny, which many
people have already told me about. I draw really good anime and manga, but Im just
getting started in this conceptual artwork and design evolution. Anything but relying on
foreign countries to do it.
Im going to invent my own genre of American comics. Sword and City comics. Scripts.
Novels. Outline. Storyboards. Production Design. Character Development and Design.
Badass longcoat comics and martial arts comics. Thats what Ive been working, and that
is what I will continue to produce.
Tips for writing fiction:
Write about anything holding you back at the moment you dont feel able to write. Write
about whats causing youre writers block, or even, the source and action of it. Its
something to write about.
Other writing tips:
Also:

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Dont be held back by trying to hold a consistent voice or describe everything in during
the first draft. First and foremost, get the outline written, write fiction in outline form,
altering between, and shifting between tenses (past, present) and first, second and third
person perspective (I, him, you, Jim) if necessary.

Saturday, March 31, 2012,

I have all the skills necessary to continue with my work and get the job done. And I will
too. Be it scripts, fiction, speculative fiction, storyboards, or a comic book page. I have
all the necessary skills to confidently complete my work without too much outside
guidance or interference.
Today, with The Ghost and Akira: The Novel, my two pieces of fiction for the day, with
the Ghost, I write like Dan Brown, and with Akira The Novel, according to the website I
Write like Arthur C. Clarke. I really got to start reading some of the novelists this website
recommends me.
I see Science Fiction Fantasy as the greatest, most imaginative form of storytelling and
writing there is. It tests the visual limits of literature and makes no apologies.
I began my career as a part-time novelist and screenwriter in 2012, this year, actually. Im
a writer of novels, scripts, and short stories, or short fiction. Short fiction is what I
write when I dont have the energy to write anything more narrative and sequentially
complex. I wrote around 6 pages of fiction of all genres in the last 2 days or so: 6 pages
of fiction. Thats quite a haul for 2 days. Finally my writing focus is starting to shift.
Finally the number of fiction pages I write is increasing. If I had to edit a finished
manuscript for a novel, I could probably handle that, too. Im becoming a formidable
novelist and writer of speculative fiction. Im writing in my powerful journal a lot less,
and writing my powerful novels more. It is finally happening. About time, if you ask me.
My Destiny as a Storyteller is being Built and Cemented: By Me, and Only Me. No one
else. Anyone else tends to mess it up. I dont mind being the only one doing this job, as I
know Im the one guy who can really get it right.
But I know one thing. You can never write too much fiction.
As it turns out, I have what I need to do my joball the jobs. All the workI have
enough to take it all on and win.
My fingers hurt from typing this much. I wrote 9 pages of journals and speculative fiction
in the last 2 days. Will soon be past 10 pages. So now Im not just a good, eloquent
writer. Im also highly productive. I want to stop and sleep. And I did take a few brief
naps around 30 minutes ago, but apparently that wasnt permanent.

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Channeling my stress, anxiety, and anger into my fiction writing was a very brilliant idea.
Im glad Ive found a way to express my anger through prose and literature and fiction,
any way other than just pure ranting and raving.
The hardest people to get a hold of are the most secluded and depressed. As it should be.
The current in-thing or IT Thing online:

Naruto
One Piece
Bleach
FMA
Toonami clips
Boondocks
Dragonball Z

If youre not responsible for one of these things I doubt youre any more popular than
anyone else online. I guess Im just going to have to go the less popular, or unpopular
route. I dont really mind.

Sunday, April 01, 2012,

My posts for the Toonami April 1st Thread, on the top of the ASMB Action Discussion
forum, got over 14,000 views.
If one looks at my experience with ASMB and YouTube, Id say it can often definitely be
easier to find an audience and high audience figures and numbers online, on popular
websites, than it is to find an audience through traditional book and comics distribution.
Given that its on the right website, the audience is just kind of there. It takes out the
retailer or consumption middle man, the retailer or TV Network, and lets people access
content directly online. Thats pretty amazing how effective it is to achieve higher levels
of influence online for people who would be less influential otherwise, offline.
Among the internet and media celebrities, I do hold a higher ranking on the press, web,
and social media hierarchy than many others. Try not to get too obsessed with your own
power. Okay, Jay?
My book, Art Manifested, has like 500 retailer results in a Google search now. Its
available from here to Tim Buck Tew. Now available as a paperback in 27 Countries!
Quantifying Influence: How influential is a celebrity really? How powerful are
celebrities?

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Monday, April 02, 2012,

So Ive divided my new work into 3 main category folders: Comics Pages, Short Stories,
and Architecture. I just created the architecture sketchbook today. And I started the short
stories folder 3 days ago.
Ive noticed a pattern. I seem to draw the same thing, repeatedly, with many drawings
done in the day, and many drawings with the same style or theme, in the same day, with
each day that goes by. Today I drew nothing but architecture. There will be days where I
draw nothing but the exact same thing or subject matter, repeatedly, for the entire
workday.
In terms of production, many in the TV animation industry measure productivity of staffs
by the cumulative length of screen-time (Number of Episodes/Hours).
There is a lot of spiritual pressure and intangible momentum surrounding my physical
presence and my job. They both draw strong reactions from almost everyone and
everything around them. There is a Lot of Power associated with me and this job of mine.
I may not be financially rich, but lets face it: Ive already won the lotto of social and
economic, and cultural influence.

Defining the Future

Defining the Form of the Future
The Power to Define the Characteristics of
The Power to Visually Manifest the Form of
The Past Defines the Present, and the Present Defines the Future
To Design A Piece of Art or an Object Means to Define its Physical, Tangible Form

There are many things my career is defining.

Art
Animation
Writing
Screenwriting
Design
Costume Design
Production Design
Comics Art
Novels, Short Stories, and Literature
Detailed Art
Conceptual Design
Science Fiction Fantasy
Cinema and Filmmaking

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Jack of All Trades Polymath Mode (Multitasking)

Single-Minded, Single Action Pursuit Mode (Doing 1 Action)
I want to master the ability to control my productivity in both modes, with the exception
of Journals. But in terms of what I draw, and my short fiction, I really want to see if I
have the endurance and concentration to focus on an individual singular pursuit for one
day.

Ive grown tired of being patient. Ive been patient enough.

Patience
Overcoming Procrastination
Doing the Writing Work
Overcoming Art Fear
Developing Willpower
Ive gotten really good at all these areas and more. But now I need to think of how I can
apply them to my work.

Tuesday, April 03, 2012,

Eventually, if and when I find enough people to hire to work at a studio I finance, my
goal will be to hire and direct an army of Katsuhiro Otomos. An army of Moebiuses,
Coreys, and Frank Millers. In other words, an army of artists that draw like my favorite
artists, and I want to hire as many from Asia and Europenow living in the United
Statesas possible.
Not only am I Changing the Face of Action Cartoons, and Redefining Action in
Animation. Im changing it forever. I want to follow in the footsteps of my writer,
writing, and story heroes: Quentin Tarantino, Yoshiyuki Tomino, and John Woo.
Action Scorpio: Bruce Lee was the ultimate Action Scorpio. Im just following his
prototype of Scorpio-style action filmmaking. The force of his punch and kick was very
much due to his intensity and power as a Scorpio Fighter and Scorpio Man of Action.

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I have some manuscripts I have ideas for, from artbooks to nonfiction, that Id love to
make illustrations for and write, where I focus each book on a certain theme or topic. For
example:

Swords, Cloaks, Trenchcoats, Badass Longcoats, Wuxia, Chanbara, Warriors,

swordsmanship, Action, Dual Wielding
Essays
Cities, Architecture, SF and Expressionist Architecture, SF Cities
Black, Noir, Neo-Noir, Notan
Fighting

Words that never get old:

Hero
Action
Mono
Gun
Sword
Blade
Post-Apocalypse
Fighting
Choreography
Martial Arts
Punch
Kick
Drama
Mythology
Science
Military
I need to continue writing about these topics and subject matter.
Top Adaptation Cross-Medium, Multimedia Role-Shifters
Comics-To-Animation

Todd McFarlane
Katsuhiro Otomo
Jhonen Vasquez
Aaron McGruder
Jamie Hewlett
Man of Action
Osamu Tezuka
Windsor McCay

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For Art: Manifested, my main money maker for the book is local and personal sales:
Selling copies of my book, directly, to friends and family. I charge $20 per copy. So far,
Ive made $40 in profits this way. $30 more in sales (if I make that much) and Ill
actually have finally paid off the amount it cost to publish and promote my book online in
the first place (a whole freaking lot). Hurray! As for me and my status. Yeah, Joe.
Youre going to be doing the job Brand-Damage ControlFor the next 2 YEARS!

There. Finally paid up on my long standing debt and I.O.U. I now have a positive net
worth of about $10. Now excuse me while I go count my money. What little of it I have
of course.

When I was growing up, Id always say to myself I want to be important when I grow
up. I want to matter and have power. And I do!

In the life of a science-fiction fantasy writerAnything you do or say, anything anyone

does or says to you, anything you go through, any emotional states, any plans or thoughts
you have, are grounds for fiction to be inspired by it. ANYTHING and EVERYTHING!
Yeah, writing is that awesome!

I came up with an invention ideas for a DVR Ripper. A kind of self-created TV channel
hardware device like Roku, except it has recorded footage from the digital TV screen. A
sort of Roku of ripped DVDs and DVR shows, promos, and movies, one that works like
Windows Media Player, but on the TV, and can playback images recorded directly from
the screen and plays everything back on my TV automatically. Now THAT would be an
invention. The TV industry has yet to make use of ripping technology as it relates to
DVR and TV. Technically it is my original idea, so that might explain the problem of no
one having thought of it yet. But DVR Boxes and Roku players are hardware that do sort
of function like a Personal Computer Hard Drive.

You can do a lot with computers. Specifically:

Online Tutorials and Articles

Books
Software
Freeware and Shareware
HDMI Cable
Laptop PC
Media Center and Player, DVD Recorder, DVR
Computer Data and Info Files
DVD-RWs

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Thursday, April 05, 2012,

I think greed and survival can indeed be a good motivation for making art. The Im
gonna make money off of this, Think o the money! aspect Phil taught me is a great
way to get myself to continue drawing each day. Think of all the money Ill be making
from my comics in the future!
Making a Profit With Digital Video:

YouTube Adsense Partners

Paid Downloads
Paid Video Hard Drive Downloads
Glomera

Products:

Recorded on DVD-RWs
TV, Movie, Animation Video Files

An Animation Downloading Site definitely seems to be the way to go for my collection.

Definitely seems lucrative enough. Im going with a $1-$3 download fee for each 30
minute to 1 hour video.

Necessary Components for Running a Download Site:

DVD Collection
Memory Stick
DVD Rips
Pinnacle Studio Pro (Editing)
DVD Recorder (DVD Player)
Download Website

So apparently, cinema is a lot more detailed than television. Thats just historically, the
context that its always been in. If you want to make something hyperdetailed, make a
Hollywood movie or a Japanese anime.
So I watched this movie with my Dad that he rented from somewhere, Transformers 3:
Dark of the Moon. Now that. Thats the most detailed movie Ive seen so far. But 80% of
the detail is high resolution debris, so its a double edged sword. The detail isnt focused
anywhere. Its an incredibly labored-looking and detail heavy film, honestly, every
camera shot of the action gives your eyeballs 5 different paths to view. Visually its like a
labyrinth. Definitely a popcorn movie, and the story wasnt that good, but it was still a
pretty fun movie. Just lots and lots of big epic heavy Hollywood sci-fi action adventure
destruction in the middle of cities and traffic. Im still trying to decide if Michael Bay and

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Steven Spielberg are a volatile or beneficial mix. Transformers 3 is so detailed, Im sure

other movies in the future will follow its example. I just hope those high budget movies
of that mold (AND video games) dont make them so detailed you lose track of whats
happening in the moment and during the action. Also, Autobots and Decepticons.
Difficult to tell the bad and good mecha apart in certain scenes, their CGI is so scattered,
compartmentalized, and big. Peter Cullen and Tom Kennys voice over were good. The
weird part is, that movie was just plain disorienting. Ive never been so dizzy and
disoriented from a Hollywood movie before. Its like flying through a tornado, debris and
all. Very impressive. Kind of mind-boggling something that big in scope is still made.
I wonder how much time I should spend a day drawing. Finally, Im starting to become
more time conscious. I think 30 minutes to 2 hours a day would be good.
Favorite anime artists who actually seem inspired by my own design style:
Toshimichi Mori
Glen Murakami

To-Do List for each work day. Plan out the day, not just the week, month, and year.
Figure out what I can do here and now. Not just in an ideal situation sometime in the
future.

Saturday, April 7, 2012,

One reason to draw action-adventure stories (the Main Reason): Because it sells and will
make you money.
Im becoming a master of Action-Adventure Webcomics and Manga.
Things Im getting really, really good at:

Drawing comics
Drawing Bruce-Timm-Style Action panels on pages
Drawing cities

In terms of just drawing comics in general, Im actually getting pretty good. Im

beginning to see quite a bit more formerly concealed talent emerging. Theres no magic
secret to making comics. Theres just putting in the time and effort, and not ever giving
up in the quest to draw the perfect panel. Its okay to start off with thumbnail and simple
panels, as long as you reach more evolved work eventually. Also, writing in this journal
can turn into resistance against drawing comics if I write in this journal too much. The
two talents, writing books & drawing comics, are battling for supremacy. Words and
stories also need to be analyze for complexity, to determine how much work is needed
and if its even possible to make such a literary vision a reality on budget and on schedule

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Im getting uppity, frustrated, and restless because of the anxiety that goes with drawing
comics full time. Im doing exactly what I need to doDeveloping and drawing panels
in comic book pagesand yet I dont feel that way. Im doing what Im supposed to be
doing, and yet even after doing so much right I still feel like Im not doing the right thing
or anything constructive, like Im running out of time till I die, like Im not doing enough
of anything. And yet I am doing the right thing. Ive made a lot of progress. Im doing
exactly was I assigned myself to do, and what I said I would do (draw fighting in comics
pages and backgrounds with cities for the fighting) yet even after doing a ton of work,
still feel like I didnt do the right thing. I need to relax. Maybe I need some reassurance.
Because no one is reassuring or comforting me about my job, insecurity and anxiety is
sneaking into my thought patterns.
These panels of mine are feeling neglected, like I dont spend anywhere near enough time
on them, on each panel. Theres no secret to drawing better panels. It takes time,
patience, a stopwatch, and a desire to be a literary auteur.
I broadcast my thoughts. I dont know why I do that. No wonder Ive ranted so much in
the past. The past 10 years was me thinking aloud. Thinking out loud to my parents and
family and friends, and thinking in written form. Stream of consciousness. There was no
preplanning
Also, for the most part, I can only afford to do 1 thing per day, at least in terms of being
able to have the energy to do one thing for a long time without getting fatigued by it.
Each day, on average, its around 20% resting and sleeping and eating, 10% other
interests, and 70%-90% whatever it is Ive chose to focus on and do for that day. I would
often write in a journal and do pretty much nothing else because that was the easiest thing
to start on.
So whatever I choose to do will be the only thing I do that day for the most part. I wanted
to write in my journal less, and I have been. Ive just kind of gotten bored with it. DA and
ASMB too. Theyre boring me. The abuse is getting boring.
From now on, Im only doing one thing per day, and chances are it will be the thing I told
myself I needed to do that day, when I decided on something the previous day.
Year Map:
2012: I finish the following:
1 more page of speculative fiction
1 more 3 panel comic book page
1 more TV Script
But not on the same day. NEVER on the same day with any of the multiple outcomes.

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When youre me, when youre an on-screen Actor: You have to be willing to let them
truly think thats you. Thats what all actors must learn to accept. Im no exception.

Writing is Left Brained,

It therefore involves a lot of Planning. Like Outlines.
Art is Right Brained
It is therefore unplanned and spontaneous in both development and nature.
Except thumbnails, Cleanup, and Layout
I dont do 25 different jobs to show off. I do those many different jobs because they feel
natural to me, to work on. Im a cartoonist, a screenwriter, an author, an executive
producer, a production designer, a novelist, and a filmmaker.

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Chapter 58
(XP)

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Monday, April 09, 2012

Ive found my niche. Drawing swordsmen, Drawing Mono as a Swordsman. Sketchbooks
and ink and paint illustrations.
In the next 2 weeks, my parents are more than likely going to be paying me a salary for
my art. My allowance and social security payments will from this point on be used to pay
me on a per-piece basis. The higher the quality of the art, and the more time I put into the
piece, the more money Ill be making from each piece of art. So now I WILL officially
have money and a salary as a motivating factor in my art. About time someone encourage
my art on a financial level. But more than anything, its a reward system my parents and I
are going to set up for myself. Its a win-win situation. My parents, since theyre using
funds that would normally be paid for nothing, will be able to appear supportive of my
talents and career, while not going for broke in the process. Im happy to receive the
same amount of money for actual work. Now Ill have a motivation and a reason to work
hard and spend hours drawing: $$$. I already make around $120 a month for doing
nothing. Now I have the potential to earn that much on the spot, entirely from working
hard at drawing. It is nice getting paid to draw.
This is gonna be awesome! Finally the financial incentive Ive always wanted, on my
OWN terms!
Why do I draw? Not because Im good. Im just okay. I like drawing comics and designs
because I like getting paidMoney. Its definitely my number 1 motivating factor. I
dont like getting paid only at the end of the month. I like making up lost time and money
by drawing: For money (of course)! Im so used to not making any money from my art. I
think I ended up pretty unmotivated for a while there. Before now, I was making money,
but not for drawing and writing, and that deeply offended me that people actually had the
nerve to assume just because I wasnt getting paid for my work that means Im not
motivated by money. I can assure you, I very much am motivated by money, but no one
offered, so I took it into my own hands to get paid for my work, through my parents if no
one else. So Im working out a production payment deal with my parents. No one in
Hollywood said I couldnt use my parents as co-producers or sponsors of my indie
art projects like webcomics, comics, books, and animation. Youre sponsors and coproducers are the people who pay your bills. Technically, that is what my parents already
are. Seriously, who cares if theyre losers or nerds? Arent all parents nerds and losers
compared to their kids? Yeah, thought so.
Definitely a motivational factor to shut the hell up and keep working at both writing
stories and drawing them. If moneys at stake here, and I dont make money unless I
work, I cant see there being too much temptation in other directions there. I either work
and make some decent money, or I dont work, be a lazy procrastinator and dont get
paidsimple as that. The options seem pretty clear cut when put that way.

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$5-$10 for an illustration there. $10 for a comic book page here.
Technically, Im not making more money on worse drawing, but rather, Im making
money at a faster rate for doing better drawings. Do you want money J? Yes? Then in
terms of always trying to work harder at drawing on a daily routine, its on!
I dont know, I used to want nothing more than to live alone, but with how psycho and
sociopathic society and the worlds gottenor maybe Im just getting olderand due to
how bad I am at maintaining a house or myself, I think a co-existence with someone else
would be preferable, a female partner my own age of some kind maybe (NOT a wife,
maybe a female companion of some sort), or maybe just friends or family. Living alone is
scary as shit if youre not living in a peaceful place, and where I live is anything but that
in my opinion. Im so used to living with my mother and father, that living with them, or
anyone I get along with for that matter, actually makes me kind of happy. I might be too
depressed and/or paranoid to live alone. It must be the influence of growing up living
with a family. On a deep emotional level, that way of living truly is hard to let go.
Part of it is the depression, or manic-depression. I have bipolar disorder or manicdepression (mania with depression), and yeah my art and writing is good, but day to day
living can be hard, and scary sometimes. Im considerably less afraid if theres someone
there with me to provide social comfort. Im not used to having to deal with life
completely alone, yet that looks to be where my life is headed. Eventually Im going to
have to confront my fear of losing my mind when living alone, if I choose to even bother
living that way. Medication just made me fat and neurotic. Ive never felt that drugs are
the answer to depression. But neither is suicide.

Because I wanted to design Mono as an admirable hero, I took some of the traits I
admired in my brother, Andrewnamely his courage and fierceness, kind of like a guard
dog or lionand channeled them into Monos persona and temperament. The things I
really remember about Andrew, I imbued into Mono. That way if I dont see Andrew in
the future, which could be possible, Ill still have something to remember my brother
with. But I based Monos way of thinking more on myself, making him at least somewhat
clever and analytical.
I dont really realize how very frightening and scary social interaction is until Im left to
my own devices in a bad situation. Which has been known to happen before.
Jeff Bezoscreator of the website I sell my books on, Amazon.comis on the cover of
Forbes Magazine this month. That is quite awesome. I like visiting Amazon.com, and I
like selling through Amazon.com. I get a good vibe from that place.
Having a boss is a tricky thing. How do you define what it means to have a boss? How do
you know who is your boss in media? And how do you know if they are your boss?

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What art of mine needs to be cleaned up and/or inked? All of it. Random pieces. Every
last bit of it probably!
Why dont I remember doing anything fun with my Dad during my childhood other than
playing baseball, racing him in a short run, doing a downhill derby, going to a car
convention, camping in Indian Guides, being in a parade, and watching A Goofy
Movie in the theatre with him as a kid? Its like Ive lost all of my positive Dad
Memories. Dads not THAT bad. I can't find it in my heart to call him a "bad parent,
because for the most part, he's not. He's just conservative, to a degree, like my brother
and mother.

My career strategy is, I pick a field of study and practice, and gather as much knowledge,
research, data, information, media article and magazine literature, and statistics about it
as I can, and share it, with friends, with family, with my journal, and with people on the
internet who I like and find commonality with.
The future generation of leaders will be chosen by the current one. The current
generation of leaders will choose people who share their love and passion for their
industry and for their firm.
Forbes Magazine Article
So, the key to being a leader of tomorrows corporate system, is to get on the good side of
the corporate leaders of today.
Do the Math: This Time, Its Epic
Lets do a little compare and contrast.
Dave Sim, when he was young, began experimenting with drugs in his early years, at the
age of 23, specifically with LSD in particular, which resulted in his being hospitalized in
a psychiatric ward right around the same age. His stay in the hospital and his experience
taking LSD inspired him to later go on to produce the ongoing, but ultimately finite
series, Cerebus the Aardvark, which was 300 issues long. The Cerebus project of 300
issues and 6,000 pages of story (not counting all his pre-production sketch and
notebooks) and artwork took Sim roughly around 27 years to complete.
Im 28. Since Im starting work on a literary Odyssey this year, in 2012, by the time Im
finished with it, if I invest the same amount of momentum Dave Sim, the irony of my
potential success would be that Id complete the same time span of work (27 years) at
exactly the age of 55, 27 years from now, in the year 2067. Thats the exact age my
biological father died of emphysema at, according to his death certificate. So Id literally
be working nonstop from now, this year till my dying year and day, for the sake of
completing a book. But clearly it would not be an ordinary book. I would be inventing a
whole new way of making comics and animation, and independent comics, and

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webcomics, and graphic novels, and cartooning, and storytelling, and graphic fiction. I
dont know if I want to finish my greatest work on the exact same year as my death. But
55 is apparently the magic number here, or at least double numbers are.
Parallax is not a mere comic book. Its so much more of an investment than that for me.
Its a life project. An Epic Journey and Quest, with a beginning, middle, and end, which
could very well span 27 years, to the very year of my own death potentially. Not
intentionally so. Even if that does end up being the case it would not have been an
intentional move for timing to be so life and death like that. But that just further proves
that creativity storytelling is my Pathway to God. Its my Pathway to Destiny. It goes
beyond life and death. Not intentionally, But Im so devoted to my work it almost feels
like its turning into life and death. Cerebus to me is an unspeakably impressive
achievement, one that is hard to trivialize, especially with the older and more historic
Dave Sims achievement in comics gets. I have an almost religious devotion to the
creative and narrative work ethic of Dave Sim: Unpopular with fans, but silently
powerful.

My father puts a lot of pressure on me to draw and work at drawing. Never encourages
me in a positive way or compliments me though.

Wednesday, April 11, 2012

When planning for the future of your career, and tomorrow, if youre planning, never
underestimated the power of crediting yourself for what you already did and achieved
today. Its not just about what youre going to do today, and what you want to do
tomorrow, and in the next week and month and year. Its also about what youve already
completed today. For instance, I want to do 3 to 4 panels a day, every day, cartoonist
style, for the rest of my life, or at least 20 to 30 years. I never should discount the work
Ive already done earlier today. The resting on laurels of achievements won through
hard work and labor earlier in The Today is a great way to learn to relax and help
pass the time till the next day, when you have to do the whole thing over again. If you
get impatient or uppity with what you havent done yet in the next day or week,
appreciate the art youve drawn already and so far today. Know that youve met your
quota for the current sequential time series of 24 hours, indulge in some patience and
endurance and get some rest, get some sleep then start over, bright and sunshiny the next
day! Let the hypnosis of the high quality of the page or pages you did today keep you
complacent, relaxed, and happy with your status improvement and achievement for the
day, carrying you into the sweet, sweet night, and into the dreams of sleep, to awake,
bright & shiny the next day, when youre energy is restored and you can deliver the same
performance or at least more attempts again the NEXT day using the same approach
(copying other, more famous and skilled artists drawings, manga, French, superhero,
indie, or otherwise).

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Ive gotten 5 new page of cartooning material drawn! Good start! Osamu Tezuka status,
Here I come! I finally feel content with my progress, and feel like Im finally on the right
path. Whatever obstacles that emerge, I will overcome them!

Thursday, April 12, 2012,

Honestly, I think much of my inability and unwillingness to drive came from the
never having been provided by my parents with the freedom to do so. But when youre
on your own, your survivalist instinct sort of kicks in, and when youre alone and have to
survive on your own without support, you find yourself being able to do a LOT of things
you would otherwise be unable to do. Sometimes disability is just a side effect of
being stifled by overbearing parents and family figures who boss you around way too
much. Being alone takes courage, but not that much if youre motivated to survive and
live a long, healthy relatively normal life.
Thats the thing. Any big task (owning a house, driving, moving out, taking care of
yourself when youre on your own, running a business, writing, comics, drawing) can be
conquered if you just take a visionary approach. Visualize yourself doing anything well
enough and you can do almost anything well if you just picture yourself doing it
beforehand, and go through the mental prep-work. Visualization is a key strategic
proponent of physical, real world success. As for parents and parental figures. Yeah, your
parents will ALWAYS take SUCH good care of you and provide EVERYTHING for
you. Till they DIE and vanish from your life forever, or worse yet just up and leave, like
some parents do. Ive never had to deal with parents who walked out on me, but I know
there are people who have had to deal with absentee parents and survive on their own, or
die of course. Really makes you a bit tougher. Not everyone is a spoiled rotten brat like
some think I am.

Friday, April 13, 2012,

Having power over the power.
Harnessing power is even more difficult than actually having power. Learned that one the
hard way. Harnessing power is just another way of saying youre able to control or
manipulate power and strength. Raw power is not always focused or efficient. Sometimes
its uncontrollable, stalled, time consuming, and a long, drawn out process. Dave Sim
harnessed the power of the universe and comics when he made the Cerebus series.
Eventually I want to learn to control my art power. Im starting to. I finished my first
polished 20 page self-published End Times issue today. End Times is the comic. Parallax
is the animation. The art-power is harnessed when the page is finished. The art-power is
harnessed when the chapter and book are finished.
It was Jamie Hewletts Tank Girl, Dave Sims Cerebus, Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles, &
Rob Schrabs Scud The Disposable Assassin that really paved the way for the whole 90s

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indie comic book scene that dominated cutting edge comics shops back in the day. They
paved the way for the likes of Scott McCloud, Jill Thompson, Faith Erin Hicks, Chynna
Clugston-Major, Paul Pope, Jim Mahfood, Evan Dorkin, and Jhonen Vasquez to do their
thing. This was before manga was a pop culture publishing icon and no one GAVE a shit
about manga or even knew what it was for that matter. That goes for any popular manga.
These manga kids dont realize how spoiled they are by the success of manga. I grew up
appreciating the generation of creators that preceded the manga and webcomics
renaissance by a decade. That is who I take the most influence from. The true and earliest
pioneers on the contemporary American comics scene. Manga didnt invent the American
comic book counterculture market. I know that much Anime and manga artists tend to
take their own fame, power, and success for granted. Especially the ones that dont know
the industries' actual history.

As for my own work, Ive outgrown the term epic ever since it became a verbal clich
overused by sluts, like black and designer.
Instead of THAT word, I prefer to think of my manuscripts as dense and longwinded. Im
big on long manuscripts. Lots of stuff happening.
Couple things Im going to be developing:
$4-per-day Social Security wage
Paper mileage, controlling art power
Sealing up window with bricks or cement to stop sound
WCN comics
Comic Book End Times One-Shot
Epic Book:
Fat book. HP Copy paper boxes. Clipboards. Papers covering floor. Scanner. Notebooks.
Computer printouts from wiki and online articles. Printed word processor writing.

This is the stuff I breathe in like oxygen.

Making art, a beautiful vision, and building it from nothing is a sport. Its a job and a task
to be mastered. Manifesting and Visualization exercises are an integral part of teaching
yourself to create comic book pages from nothing. Manifestation and Visualization
Training is not something any of my previous art teachers taught me. This exercise is
tailor built, tailor-made, and tailor designed to be suited to my personality. The
personality of the Master Builder 22. Drawing doesnt come out of a black hole. You
need reference. Pictorial research and reference material.

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Necessities for writing Alternative Action Comics:

Gun Literature (magazines),
Quentin Tarantino gangster films and John Woos Hard Boiled on DVD
Story by Robert McKee
How to Write For Animation by Jeffrey Scott
Published script books for Hollywood Movies.
And thats just for writing Gun Scripts.
Things stopping me from finishing End Times Volumes:

Chapter/Volume 1: I hate the Villain too much. I hate thinking about him.
Chapter/Volume 2: Boring Procedural Elements I dont fully understand
Chapter/Volume 3: Ayn is a kid. I dont know anything about those
Chapter Volume 4: Prince Valiants personality so far is superman-like,
incredibly boring
Chapter Volume 5: Percepto is a shallow Villain whos not developed enough
Chapter Volume 6: Weatherman has been done, how can I make it new again
Chapter Volume 7: Am I really good at Samurai back stories?
Chapter Volume 8: Silas The Virus, kind of irks me
Chapter Volume 9: Kidnapping story? Is such subject matter appropriate?
Chapter Volume 10: Mono Trains with the Elder
And where the hell is Nosfor throughout all of this?
Wheres the martial Arts?
Wheres the city?
What goes on at S Op 7 all day?
How aware is everyone of The Apocalypse?
How much does the Apocalypse factor into the setting?
Cities with crimson clouds overhead, but also blue, yellow, red, and orange
skies.
What are the current events of the day in America: New Earth

Requirement: 22 Minutes of Screentime for each story. Thats how much time you have
to tell each volumes story on screen. Parallax and End Times will not be the same
project, other than the fact that theyll have an Akira-film-comic like multiverse of an
altered events and different characters in some instances.
To be a good comic book creator, you need to draw a lot of training panels. You have to
draw a lot of bad panel compositions of big, medium, and small sizes of all varieties,
BEFORE you can draw clean, polished ones.

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I miss my friend Johnny Bartlett. We used to love drawing stuff together, but at some
point he decided to stop pursuing art, and keep pursuing music. And hes really good at
it! I miss being able to show him my work. Other than Phil and Donna, he was the only
real life drawing peer friend and colleague I ever had who was also an artist. Id show
him a piece, he would look at it and shout Wow. That is awesome! then proceed to
critique it quite effortlessly. I miss those days. I dont like the artists online half as much
as I like my old friend Johnny. They aren't kind to me like he was.
OK, so I DONT entirely know where the meat of my story is going. I have a vague idea.
But, Ive still got a lot of plot mileage left to cover and travel (traverse), just like I have a
lot of pencil and ink mileage to cover.
My publishing style is chaotic, sloppy, strung together and disorganized. Every time I
publish a book, its disorganized, sloppy, and not-polished as all hell. But it IS published.
I was thinking, instead of doing an allegory of folklore and current events, what if I began
pursuing an allegory of daily events as well, ones that happened directly to me.
Daily job: Expanding the Outlines for existing End Times Storylines and subplots.
Breaking down the difference between screen-time (Minutes) and manuscript book-time
(Hours).
Back in 2008 and 2009, Id do 3 to 5 new, powerful looking drawings and suddenly Id
be all hyper-enthusiastic and power-mad. Well, at least Im learning from my
miscalculations. Like The Girl in the Cybernetic Suit. That one made me really full of
myself. It was a good drawing, but I ended up a little cocky in the aftermath.

Sunday, April 15, 2012,

Requirements for creating a scene: Location, one place at one time. Events happening at
that location for 1 time only.
Ask questions about Jonathan, the x-marine.
Who is Jonathan? What is his back story? How did he come to power for the moment?
How powerful is he? How smart is he?

Im going to write nothing but random, non-sequitur script and novel and comic
book outlines for the rest of this year 2012. Nothing but raw narrative action
strategy and blueprints.

Self-Starter Goals for Today:

Comics and Animation Sword and City Compositing in Photoshop elements

(scans, edits)

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Writing Outlines endlessly

Storyboards (OTS Over the Shoulder Shots, Camera Shots, Thumbnails)

Sword and City Superimposition
All Traditional Style Anime and Animation is just superimposed and composited
images (placing characters and the props they interact over layouts and
superimposing foreground objects over background objects. This is how indie
filmmaking production like mine are done too)
Outlines
Scripts

These elements, if put together no longer seem random and unrelated. Theyre starting to
feel integrated to me. Like a cohesive unit. A cohesive puzzle that eventually fits
together. Working on a big cohesive creative production at home feels awesome!
Cohesiveness is the ultimate goal of any Architect or Builder.
The market is so overcrowded and high-pressure now.
Its enough to almost make a guy not wanna draw comics at all, and not even
BOTHER

Well according to Klout, my Klout score is 25, and I influence 78 others in my Twittercentric social network.
If REAL influence online (and not banner ad clicks and Twitter follower stats)
automatically resulted in higher pay.Id already be making a six figure income.
I hate the system. Im never going to sell out like some people. Ill never sell out to the
Man. Or The System. The Man and the System and the Establishment laugh at your
misfortune, and try to discredit what you do, earn, and achieve. I know how this works.
For them its win/win. All they have to do is keep applauding, laughin it up, and making
unearned money. Meanwhile Im left to toil in the salt mines for little to no reward. Kind
of psychotically deranged way to govern the world and be a gatekeeper, if you ask me.
My creative outputif I combine the page counts of writing with the page counts of
artaverages out to around me creating around 1,000 pages of art, writing, & printout
articles a year.
Osamu Tezuka had a work rate of roughly a about 6 pages of art-&-writing a day.
He averaged around 2,000 pages a year, primarily of comics.
I have a page rate thats half that. I produce roughly 1,000 pages a year, but its mostly
journals and sketches. A different style for a different time.

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So my work totals about 50% of Tezukas page rate. Even when hes got a 100 year head
start.

If I want to one day close in on Tezuka, I need to apply the 10,000 Hour, 10 Year Rule. It
took me 10 years to master the turning of a phrase and general writing.
Im giving myself another 10-20 years to learn the following:
Drawing Comics
Screenwriting for TV Animation and Action Cartoons
Writing a Novel
Its 2012. So by 2022, chances are Ill be an expert at those things by then. Hell, I already
waited half that time for a single magazine issue to come out with an article Id hoped
theyd write, but they never did. I waited almost daily for that animation article to come
out, for 5 whole years since 2007. And it never did get printed. Im the master of waiting
and patience. If I want something bad enough, work is easy and improvement as well as
progress in my work ethic improves in 10 years in a heartbeat. The easier it is to do, the
more you get to do it.
Schedule for 2012 follows the 10 Year Rule, ending during 2022.
Work between the hours of Noon 7 p.m.
Draw 1 page each hour
For 3 hours each day,
Every week, Every month, Every year
For 10 years straight.
It can be writing or art, script, outline, thumbnail,
or panel layout, or more, like a whole page of comics

Outlines
Scripts
Comics page
Prose Page

Technically Im a self taught Comics Creator, Novelist, Producer, Editor, and

Screenwriter. The only thing I didnt learn myself was animation production and art in
general.
How well you draw manga is essentially tied to just how Asian you actually are, in spirit
and consciousness, if nothing else. Drawing manga must be some kind of divine test, that
makes you ask yourself, How Asian am I?

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Even if I do put in all this extra effort into comic book illustration, is it really even going
to make an actual difference in my career? Will it lead to a paycheck of royalties ever?
Or would it not even make a dent in the public arena? Why do I suspect it wouldnt make
much of a difference? But even if it doesnt make a dent on the public radar, a part of me
still wants to do it, regardless of how much impact it has.
Seventh Sanctum the site is a very helpful thing for a writer to have.
My secrecy about my career and ambitions has imprisoned me in a bedroom. 1 room,
thats all I have, and its all because Im too secretive about my book manuscripts to
publish any of them! Curses!
Areas Ive already mastered:

Production Design
Character Design
Costume Design
Dual Wielding
Firearms
Sword Fights
Noir Style of Inking
Avant-Garde / Anime Camerawork
Outlines
Script
Dialogue
Trenchcoat
Silhouette
Noir Covers

Why not explore this territory more extensively (since Im already pretty good at it)?
Publishing Industry:
Creator (me)
Printer (Lulu, CreateSpace)
Publisher (Image, SLG, Dark Horse, CreateSpace)
Distributor (Diamond Comics, Previews)
Comic Shop (Acme Comics)

There are really only 2 main printers who arent Lulu or CreateSpace, that also specialize
in the comic book printing business, that are still in business: Brenner Publishing and
Port Publication. Ill probably use one or both of them as a printer of my self published
comics at some point, assuming my art continues to improve.

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Honestly, I dont care about making good or pretty art. I care about making art I can
live off of and publish, period! I care about making something, a series of sequential art,
that I can publish and make money off of through self-publishing, Previews Catalog, and
Diamond Comics. Now that I know the secret to making a living at comics, it doesnt
seem so hard.

Im a loner. I belong to a very exclusive club of loners: Writers, authos, artists, directors,
producers, comic book creators, scientists, and engineers of the highest caliber and
variety are often recluses, hermits, and loners. They hate(d) interact with other humans,
in the same fashion I do. Geniuses are not social creatures most of the time. They hate
crowds and group gatherings, just as I do as well.
My sketchbooks, scripts, and manuscripts offer amazing things, imaginative places and
characters the world has never seen before. No ones ever seen what I do before.
I havent had any artistic inspiration lately. So I havent been drawing today. I dont
remember if I drew anything yesterday, and I dont know if Ill be drawing tomorrow
either.
Im a lightworker. That means my energy feeds off of the sun and daytime energy for the
most part, ever since I started taking the medicine I do. Im not productive at all during
the night, and Im most depressed at nighttime, in mid-night.
Therefore I should only focus on drawing when I have real energy. The morning, day,
and afternoon. Its the only time to draw really. Well, for me anyway. I need a lot of light
shining on me to do anything good artistically
I draw in the day, and I write during the day. I dont have the energy to be up all night
working. I need my sleep.
Since I dont have the spiritual or creative energy to draw at night most of the time, I can
channel and harness my hyper-focus, energy, and mental power in other ways, to help
pass the time so Ill have more patience to wait around for the next daytime drawing
shift, potentially tomorrow.
I can practice drawing during the day.
And I can practice focusing my mind, and meditation at night. To make my spirit and
mind strong, to keep me in shape for drawing and weight lifting during the day.
I too need some Daily Spiritual Affirmations:
For Example:

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I AM IN THE
MASTERPIECE.

MIDDLE

OF CREATING

A COMIC BOOK

LITERARY

I AM ON MY WAY TO MAKING A LOT OF MONEY AT MY ART AND WRITING

Im working out, lifting weights, and building stronger arms for more stamina and energy
in my line quality, and in the physical aspect of my drawing process. Im just tired of
drawing with fat, lazy arms, but very strong hands. I want strong upper-lower arms too.
In a short term sense, the art-power is harnessed when the drawing-or-page is finished.

Wednesday, April 17, 2012,

As of now, theres 1,000s of anime TV series out there to watch. Ill try to watch as many
as I can.
IM WATCHING 1,000s OF ANIME EPISOES A YEAR. 2-HOURS A DAY
IM BECOMING CONFIDENT AS A SCREENWRITER, NOVELIST, AND COMICS
ARTIST

Keys to drawing-writing a lot.

Take Breaks, and lots of them
Dont have Tunnel Vision
Work 3 Hours a Day, on average, for 10 years

Tuesday, April 17, 2012

Because of what happened with the internet, I saved my life, and the lives of many others
with the culture-altering technology I created. I saved us all. Youre welcome.

Im looking forward to seeing how this new Disc-to-Digital service-based technology is

going to be exploited and utilized online. Obviously, Wal-Mart is not the only company
that wants to use Disc-to-Digital technology. Ive wanted to do the exact same thing with
a DVR Box months before any such announcement was made. But now that someones
engineering it, at least somebody is utilizing it. Did I get ripped off again? Doesnt really
concern me, now that its on the market.

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Neighbors. Cant live next to em, and cant brain em. Well you can brain em, but youll
face prison time for murdering your neighbors. Not a bad act in and of itself, but if youre
in jail, its impossible get comics drawn.
As for my neighbors, they keep trying to distract me with their across-the-street and overthe-fence noise distractions and other forms of harassment. They actually have the
audacity to try to keep me from doing my passion (drawing comics) by trying to throw
me off with taunts jeers from the area surrounding my house. I know theyre trying to
stop me from reaching my goal, trying to stop me from drawing in general, and trying to
stop me from advancing in general, and especially moving out and escaping Seminole
County, Florida, a very messed up place indeed. Ive got to keep working through all the
stressful taunting, bullying, and psychological harassment somehow.
Things standing in the way of a complete End Times

Evil neighbors (taunts, mimicry, and bullying)

Andrews tantrums
Andrews schemes and plots
Andrew being in this house, EVER
Cary (guns n swords)
The TV
The Internet, ASMB, DA, Megatokyo, Twitter
My doctors
Fatigue
Lack of inspiration
Lack of visualization

Im going to have to only draw for myself from now on. I refuse to scan or share my
artwork with family and friends. My art is for my eyes and my eyes only. Unless
someones psychic, or a spy, which in some cases they are, they wont be seeing any
comics art from me. I must keep my work off of the computer. People have access to that.
Creepy. I need to return to my initial naivety. No one elses opinion, public, professional,
or criticalon the subject of my artwork and sketching and comicsmatters to me
anymore.

I need to pick my strongest skills and figure out how to be successful at them.
Options:
Writing Fiction
Writing-Drawing Graphic Fiction
Screenwriting

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In one sense, Im very much a genre-theorist and a creative medium-theorist. I mix and
match genres and creative mediums in my sleep!
Im going to be testing out one of my new experimental story concepts: Combining
Elements of Noir and elements of sword and sandal, or sword and city. Its a character
who is a cop-show warrior. A badge, 2 swords, and 2 guns, or just one sword and one gun
if the occasion calls for it.
Found an Awesome Website: http://www.cheshirecatart.com/masterclass.html

Generally speaking, the younger the child, the more simple the art they tend to
like.
The older and more mature the viewer/reader, the more detailed and complex the
visuals that they like.

Prolific, ingenious comic book artists always serve as the best inspirationartists such as
Moebius, Todd McFarlane, Otomo, Hiroaki Samura, Yoshiyuki Sadamoto, and Yasuhiro
Nightow.
Things in my room worth money:
Books
Comic Books
Magazines
Music CDs
DVDs
Electronics
Hardware
Creative projects
Art
Writing
Video files
Computer Files
Animation art in America is, at worst, disposable junk food and Happy Meals for the
mind with no soul or real value. Not a real form of art.
Animation art in America is, at best, a shallow imitation of more complex forms of art,
such as literature, Eurasian animation, film, comics, illustration and fine art.
There are differences in the execution and process of illustrative works (comics,
illustration), and animation designs/motion, that can make the two mediums (Movement
and Illustrative Graphical Lines on a page) difficult to compare in one sense. For
example, no matter how detailed animation is (and make no mistake, some of it is), it will
always be trying HARDER to create the illusion of motion and life and real time. Thats
why animation is so animator heavy and animator centric. The real stars, that arent the

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creators and producers and directors and designers, would be the animators, especially in
Japan.
In illustrative arts and comics, we get to see an artists work and process laid bare. We
can literally see the amount of time invested in each drawing and illustration by
observing how many lines go into the drawings pencil and inking phase. The more lines
an artwork has, the more density it has, the greater the amount of work that went into it.
Detail = work and passage of a larger amount of time
Simplicity = less work and a shorter amount of time
Art is a never-ending process. Its a lifelong evolution. Theres really mostly no such
thing as a finished drawing. Only artists who quit working and adding things onto their
art. You can never stop adding things (lines, textures) to a drawing. The work process
doesnt have a limit or stopping point. It has an abandoning point, but not a completion
point. The drawing is never complete, finished, or done. The ideaof a drawing having a
finished formis an illusion concocted by lazy artists and/or quitters. Thats one way to
achieve a greater amount of detail. Never call it quits on a drawing or piece of art.
Always keep adding on, over days, weeks, months, and years. Keep adding more lines to
the drawing, keep adding more images to the collage.
Energy drinks are definitely a cure for depression. Perked me right up.

Friday, April 20, 2012,

We French auteur comics artists simply love all things perspective. French artists like me,
with my French blood, love cities. We love cities and city architecture in design and
comics. I have a natural inclination for drawing cities. The wall in my bedroom is
covered with comic book art of perspective-based comic book citiesfrom Neo-Tokyo,
to Ghost in the Shell, to the world of Blacksad. America doesnt really respect
perspective and cities in its animation the way Japan and the French do. Thats one
advantage to having French ancestrya natural appreciation for vanishing points and
dense cities and metropolitan areas that dont really exist in real life, but instead exist on
paper only.for now.
Found some Perspective Grids:
http://www.printablepaper.net/category/perspective

Though Im drawing comics, not just writing novels, I like to think of myself as a literary
figure and author, just like Bill Waterson and Dave Sim. I always emphasize the story
element of comic books and comics. I want comics and animation to qualify as literary.
And as Illustration, Illustrated Story Concepts, Graphic Novels, Anime Literary Bibles
and whatnot, whether painted or inked or even penciled or done in charcoal.

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You can do Amazing Things tooling around in Adobe Photoshop Elements with the
Magic Extractor feature, experimenting with compositing and superimposition
techniques. I already achieved that very feat once today. Its just too bad with Magic
Extractor, it makes you draw and trace around the image with the mouse feature (which
can be difficult in some places). It sort of seems like it should have a Magic Wand feature
of some kind, so you can just highlight contours and whatnot. It would be much easier
than attempting to draw withand doing a sloppy job withthe mouse arrow.
Good tools to have:

Adobe Photoshop Elements (Images / Magic Extractor feature)

1, 2, & 3-Point Perspective Grid (Good for architecture)
Rulers and Angled Rulers
Magic Wand Feature (For filling in Blacks)

So far Ive worked on artwork in my sketchbook for 3 consecutive days in a row, without
stopping. Happy or depressed, Blissful and Peaceful or Furious and Hateful. No mood is
exempt or safe from spilling itself onto the pages of my sketchbooks. Ive been meeting
the self-imposed requirement of around 3-4 pages of sketches and art a day, every day,
for the last 3 days. Its the art version of the morning pages. Im trying to avoid pushing
myself too much, letting myself take breaks and drift off to other areas of interest. I tend
to always return to the page with a pen or pencil (but especially a pen) time and time
again, good or bad, come hell or high water. No mood, no matter how angry or depressed
is actually able to stop me from sketching in my books. But in all objectivity, even
though I suffer a lot from anger, depression, boredom, evil neighbors, a rude and
obtrusive family of roommates, even family and neighbors at their loudest, rudest, and
nastiest, and the foulest of moods doesnt seem to be stopping me from gaining a little bit
of extra pencil mileage on the page a day. Those things used to stop me, but they were
only able to impede on my progress when I wasnt just drawing for myself the way I keep
a journal for myself. This is my Left-Brain Journal. My sketchbook is my Right-Brain
Journal. As long as I dont overwork myself, there is very littleif anything, from
fatigue to evil siblings and neighborsblocking my path to a larger quantity of more
labored and more detailed illustrative work and artwork.

Time Heals All Wounds

Proverb

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The Authoring of a Calendar Chronicle

I wouldnt be drawing as much and as frequently and consistently as I do if I didnt see a
correlation between images and literature. If Im going to be an actual artist, which I sort
of am, there must be some redeeming value that Im able to see in visual concepts, be it
props or anatomy and costume design: a.k.a. Literary GraphicsGraphic Literature. I am
an author of not only words and story structure, but also of images and graphics as a
literary device used to further a narrative-based, literary agenda. I have to stay with what
Im comfortable with: And that is literature and a daily literary graphic record and daily
documentation, for both my career and personal, private life (a sketchbook and journal);
documentation of daily pencil and ink mileage throughout the passage and unfolding of
time, in sequence in the form of a growing, increasing, and ever expanding literarygraphic mosaic chronicle. In this case, its the life story of The Legend of Mono Jubei:
Reincarnated Swordsman of the New-Earth Apocalypse.
I call the sketchbook morning pages a Calendar Chronicle Narrative. As in youre
counting the days as they go by while building a narrative with each passing day I mark
off the calendar. Im chronicling each day of work as it goes by, and watching the vast
volume of pages of art and literature stack up and collect in a stack of papers, and
eventually a bound, printed book collection over time. Its a day-by-day Literary
Chronicle and Collection of image and words. By this logic, the narrative cant help but
be epic and long, with a fat manuscript every time. Its daily work and raw fortitude or
perseverance over many years.
And when dealing with day to day tasks of separate goals, its important to not be too
rigid in process or work on (and completion of) tasks. One just has to go with the flow,
and mark it up on the calendar or accomplishments list, and biography write-up after the
fact.

Skill and TalentArt & Writing:

The Energy and Power-Balancing Act Of the Multi-Talent
I have much power to spare. In particular, I have multi-talent power. I have the power to
work in an pursue more than one field with near equal dexterity, energy, skill, talent, and
force, like writing novels and scripts, and drawing comicsif I set my mind to it. It takes
a lot of energy and focus, but if I really want to work in that modemulti-talent
modejuggling and alternating between numerous tasks each day, I can. It just takes a
little bit of training and graphing and charting my early progress with diagrams and flow
charts, so I can make sure Im using equal energy in both or all areas of my work quota.
It took some training and practice, but Im evening out the dual energy and power
dispersal to compensate for the difference in the energy levels of my Journal writing, and
everything else (sketchbook chronicling, cartooning, design, and writing speculative short
and long fiction

P a g e | 395

My Multi-Talent Interests:

Technology
Art
Literature
Writing
Publishing
Drawing
Business
Travel
World Culture
Media
Filmmaking
Music
Architecture
Eurasia

Saturday, April 21, 2012,

Ive been drawing at least twice a day, every day, for the last 4 days. Ive been keeping
track. Ive grown more accustomed to drawing and practicing and training in art every
day, instead of just when I want to or am inspired, and not following my emotions so
much, but instead following a set calendar. Im getting really good. Im really very good
at perspective now. I never drew a city on a perspective grid page before, and now thats
what Im starting to do. It makes a huge difference. My architecture and layouts actually
look like they coming at the viewer now. Its been a crazy week with my family, but at
least Im getting work done. Not working: It feeds my depression, so I work to stay
happy. I work on art and comics to not be depressed. Im afraid of how I feel when I
dont draw on grid or comics paper.
Im turning into a real Master of Perspective. A Perspective Master, up there with the
best of them. Not all my attempts at Perspective, Architecture, Cities, and Production
Design are perfect, but some of them really are. Perspective Grids are really awesome.
Most artists dont want to master Perspective or Architecture or Cities. I do.
Im getting better at the whole originality thing. You really only need to copy when
youre first starting off, not so much when you get really good.
End Times Pilot One-Shot, or Issue #1 arrived from the printers today, and although
sloppy, amateurish, and unrefined in certain places, the entire 20-page 1-shot does have
one strong quality going for it. Its not a fan comic. Its entirely made up, and is
completely made of original art and writing by me. By that standard, by the mere fact that
I made up the whole issue, its actually pretty amazing! And it also shows a lot of
improvement over the first few comic books I ever published. I initially started off with

P a g e | 396

stick figures, gestures and thumbnails, and doujinshi, or fan pages of my favorite
books, like Spawn, Blade of the Immortal, and Akira. At the very least, my original
comic book work, which now spans at least 45-50 pages or more, is getting a lot more
structured and polished in its execution. As Jhonen once said something very similar to, it
may be shitty comics, but its my shit, so I embrace it. I remember one of my goals was to
produce more original comics artwork, and Im finally getting around to doing that. I
finally can do it. Im improving a lot. Im far from perfect, but all of the one-shot is made
up and related to parallax:
End Times Analysis of 20-Page One-Shot:
Content: Introductions, Sword Fights, Investigation, Firing Guns, Weapons Wielding,
Cities and Atmosphere, girls, Fist Fights
Form: Part-noir, Some Black Bakgrounds, Black and White Art, All Ink, 50-50 RefinedUnrefined. Needs More Polish. Sloppy in Some Areas, Pixelated. Still Very Original

So Im finally able to draw completed, original comic book One-Shots. Im so very

happy Im finally starting to reach this level.
For better or worse, the one-shot I completed most recently is in facta finished product.
While there are areas Id like to improve, technically it is a product: A formatted, selfproduced comic book issue, that fits the same format Nny and Mahfood comics do.
Things are looking up! When I do 5 issues of 1-shots like the 1st and second ones I
finished, Ill end up with a 100-page Graphic Novel. Finish 10 issues, and the Graphic
Novel will be 200 pages long! By that time, by the time I reach that goal, my artwork and
page layouts might actually be publishable, instead of just beginner level. Ah well. Better
late than never.
I finished my first COMPLETED (penciled and inked sequential art) comic book issue or
one-shot at the age of 28, around the end of April 2012.
If END TIMES: ONE-SHOT were more refined, and if I had a better work ethic to
follow up on creating more issues, which I kind of already do have, there are a number of
things I could do with this comic book issue:

Submit a bunch of copies of it to Diamond Comics Previews Magazine Catalogue

Use it as part of a presentation bible to sell a screenplay or TV show bible
Submit a copy of the issue to a comic book agent, or one of my favorite
publishers for potential further publication/feedback.

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At least I have options

Top Reasons Fans Dont Like Me:

I dont respond to everyones messages

I take long hiatuses
My artwork is crude at times
They think Im some kind of weirdo
They think I cant draw

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Journals IV
Chapter 1

P a g e | 399

Sunday, April 22, 2012,

You know something is a discipline or at least a habit if you can do it without thinking
about it. For instance, I have so much will-power for writing that I do it every day, and
experience it in the form of a habit, habitual routine, where I do it without thinking about
it. Its going to take at least a month or three to draw everyday, consecutively and
sequentially, in a large series of days, until I just simply pick up a pen and sketch each
day without stopping or missing a day. Drawing is starting to become a habit, but its
going to be a while and many energy drinks later until I build up some fortitude in that
area.
I kind of love the idea of paving the way for other comic book artists and animation
auteurs around the world, in Japan, France, China, Korea, and America. I stand out as a
comic book industry leader by now, and I always will, probably even beyond the grave,
whenever that happens.
Since Im paving the way, every time I achieve progress and innovate, everyone else
does, too.
Tools For Drawing:

Bendable Ruler
Regular Ruler
Perspective Grids
Adobe Photoshop Elements (Magic Extractor)
Blueline Pencil
Stop Watch
Strathmore Sketchbook
5-Hour Energy Drink
Caffeine and Energy
Favorite Comic Books
Copier / Printer
Scanner
Mechanical Pencil
Eraser
Mirrors
Weapons (Or Replica Weapons)
Script
Drawing Desk
Sharpie Marker
Acrylic Brushes
Acrylic Paint
Paint Easel
No. 2 Pencil
Light Box

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You know, I really should stop living my life around predictions made by an Oracle test I
took which said Id have a lot of money when I grew up. I mean, what if the miniprophecy is wrong and Im not actually going to be rich later on?
It is a huge honor and thrill to get to live to see one of my major printed works being
distributed through a co.jp e-commerce bookstore. Im one of the first ever, if not THE
FIRST EVER American manga-ka cartoonists under 30 to have a self-published book, or
any book by an American manga-cartoonist to have his book distributed directly through
a Japanese retailer. Considering how much I adore and admire the Japanese in many
ways, thats a huge honor for me. Partially because of how difficult it is. Todd
McFarlane, Jhonen Vasquez, Jim Mahfood, Dave Sim, Rob Schrab. I dont know how
much their work has been distributed in Japan, if at all, considering the direct market for
comics isnt exactly the most Japanese place there is. That's definitely a plus in
publishing through Amazon. I guess I am kind of a goodwill ambassador for the United
States contemporary world comic book industry. But serious attempts at drawing manga
shouldnt just be about the aesthetic. Its just as much about where youre books or sold
and distributed, as it is about how theyre drawn or printed. Its The Power of Presence.
In Japan.
Zen and the Art of Drawing Comics
My concentration is becoming Zen-Like.
Other than FranceJapan and China are priority markets for me, and Im just very
thrilled and happy to associate with them, and doing business with Japan directly in some
ways finally.
God doesnt exist. But my art and literary power does. I dont need confirmation of my
raw powers existence just to know it exists, have faith in it, believe in it, and use it. I
already know it exists. Thats what faith is for. Man doesnt run the universe, and neither
do Jesus or God. Those things and people dont exist in the way we know them. They
never did. Science runs the universe, and man, technology, science, and nature run the
earth. They hold the ultimate power, not God. I dont believe in a higher power either.
The more faith you put in your own power, the more power you yourself will have. Man,
if he is strategic, visionary, systematic, cinematic, and an intelligent builder and architect
or pioneer of the future, Builds His Own Future. We dont need God to build our future.
We never have. Man built the future, or the current moment in the present. God had
nothing to do with that. In that sense, I dont believe in a God. I believe in myself, and
my power to create Great Art, the future of an Entire Medium and Genre
The Starting Habit
The First Step Habit
Making a compulsion out of getting started
Making a habit out of starting and taking baby steps

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Most media related art on internet artwork and TV shows isnt appealing. It takes up the
whole composition, and at times is detailed, but it loses its own value when none of that
good art actually has charismatic appeal to it. In other words, for every Yasuhiro
Nightow, there are hundreds of really, really bad artists of both simplicity and detail who
dont know how to make a drawing half as appealing as 1 of his. It comes from having a
superior style of artistic firepower: Appeal in a drawing. An objective internal vision and
eye.

Tuesday, April 24, 2012,

Plus:
Technically, yes, I can draw. Im too good at drawing to abandon it. That would be just
as bad if not worse than producing drawings of poor quality.
Negative:
I often find drawing tedious and fatiguing
Often it seems like I cant draw, because I do more bad drawings than good at times
So I have 2 choices:
1. The suffering of continuing to work at art, and the pain and awkward and
fatiguing feeling of always drawing
2. The suffering of not working at art and feeling the absence, the guilt, suffering
and boredom of NOT Working.
Its either the pain of working at art or the pain of not working at art. Which is worse?
Subliminally, in my bad writing, I keep trying to sabotage myself subconsciously, by
treating drawing badly and writing about drawing like its a burden and pain, when it
isnt anything like that much of the time. Im exaggerating the suffering involved in
doing my job. Probably because I fear starting my work and success and finishing my
work and selling it and making millions of dollars.
Self-Coach Says: You need to stop with the self sabotage RIGHT NOW! Youre a great
artist no matter what anyone says, and youre just as good at drawing as anyone, no
matter how much of an art genius they are. You Joseph, are just as much of an artistic
genius as any other artistic genius, from Picasso to Michelangelo to Rima and Todd to
Leonardo and Jamie Hewlett, Moebius, and Corey Jackson. Youre just as good. Stop
putting yourself down in the name of the master (Hiroaki Samura and Otomo), and start
believing you can surpass him! Dammit, I KNOW I can do this. So why am I pretending
like I can not.

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Drawing and Getting Rich = Suffering

Not Drawing: Remaining Poor = Suffering
Either way I wont end up happy
Either way Im going to suffer, so I may as well pick the path of suffering that actually
pays off in the end. That would be Drawing and Never Quitting.

Competing Detailed Animation Styles Currently On Air:

The Legend of Korra
Tron: Uprising
Motorcity
Ultimate Spider-Man
Toon Goggles.com
Yu Gi Oh Zexal
Redakai
Pokemon: Black and White
Monsuno
Dragonball GT
Metalocalypse Season 4
BeyBlade Metal Masters

But what if I DONT WANT TO move to Los Angeles to find work??? Well,
EVENTUALLY, Im going to have to talk to people in Los Angeles.

Ive been drawing a minimum of 2-3 pages or drawings of art a day, every day, without
faltering or quitting or taking a break, or stopping the turning of art into a daily activity,
for the last 7 daysnonstop. Thats exactly 1 week. Ive been drawing every day for 1
week.
[Be on the lookout:] Things that can happen: Possible Hazards that have already
happened in the past: Rain, Storms, Bad News, Scandal, Being Framed, Humiliation,
Mocked, Bad TV, Being Picked On by Bad TV, Neighbors yelling things, Andrew argues
with Dad, Dad argues with Andrew, Nothing on TV, Internet Slander and Libel,
DeviantART Histrionics, Persecution, Neighbors are Acting up, My family hangs out
around the house all day, Exhaustion, Depression, Lack of Inspiration, Lack of
Motivation, Fatigue.
Areas of Focus: Script, Comic, Novel, Storyboard
Fundamental Understructure of each area:

Comic; StoryboardPanel-Shots, Foreshortening Overlap, Sequential Art

Script; NovelDescription, Dialogue; Action, Scenes,

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Descriptionwhat happens in story-narrative of events? (Write by processor or hand)

Dialoguewhat gets said? (Write it on a processor or by hand in a notebook on paper)
Panel Boxes, CameraCompositional Artwork (Pencil, Eraser, Ink)
Foreshortening Overlapcreating depth of field (Pencil, Eraser, Ink)
Tools for achieving this:

Paper
Notebook
Sketchbook
Script Word Processor Software
Regular Word Processor Software
Ways to make money (and Success Story Examples):

Pioneer more Video Inventions and Patent them (Bill Gates, Steve Jobs)
File For Venture Capital for Company or Invention (or both) (Larry Page)
Make comics specifically for the Franco-Belgian Market (Glen Keane)
Relocate to Los Angeles and Find Work at a Studio as an intern in the mailroom (Relocation:
Jhonen Vasquez, Mailroom: Sean Akins)
Submit a novel manuscript to an agent of science-fiction (Most Sci-Fi Novelists)
Submit Trade Paperback to a Comic Book Agent (No one yet. Lulu is new)
Submit my Animated Series Bible to an Agent (Have someone else sell it) (Examples unknown)
Find an Agent and Lawyer in General (it helps)
Submit 1-shot issues series to Diamond Comics Previews Catalog (Dave Sim, Jeff Smith, Rob
Schrab)

Key Words For Making Money:

Invention (Technology)
Patent (Business, Technology, Selling)
Comics (Art)
Relocate (Lifestyle)
Los Angeles (Location)
Intern (Career, Status)
Mailroom (Vocation, Location)
Novel (Writing)
Agent (Law, Business)
Trade Paperback (Publishing, Art)
Series Bible (Media, Art, Writing, Selling, Business, Animation)
Lawyer (Law)
One-Shot Issue Series (Art, Publishing, Comics)

Piracy? Piracys GREAT! I earned billions of dollars from figuring out how to get pirated
anime videos to run easily and smoothly online with YouTubetheoretically of course.
Ive already earned 7 billion theoretical dollars in profit through Google and YouTube in
2006. So maybe thats the fortune of mine the Oracle was referring to. My billions of
dollars Ive already earned for an innovative company, but was never actually

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compensated with. Its the worlds biggest irony. I did earn those billions of dollars
though. Theoretically speaking at the very least, that is how much Im worth. Im worth
billions of dollars.
I have a lot of what Doing the Work refers to as Resistance working against me in my
art. I feel a lot of gravity and inertia and fatigue and depression and anxiety weighing me
down. Picking up a pen to draw, and sometimes even picking up the paper or sketchbook
as wellat least just a few moments ago when I drew my third panel line for the day
feels like lifting weights. Its the spiritual, psychological, and emotional pressure
equivalent of lifting weights. Clearly theres a Pressure Force working against me that
makes it hard for me to work continually or without stopping permanently for that
particular day. It almost feels like a part of me doesnt want to acknowledge the
existence of the Pressure Force. Self-sabotage? Not wanting to move forward? Pressure
Force? Anxiety, depression and fatigue? Fear of success and independence? Resistance?
What is this force trying to stop me. Its like the energies of the universe are working and
conspiring against me, doing everything in their power to keep me from advancing.
Maybe I should draw cartoons about this concept, with AKIRA-like effects shots.
Illustrate this pressure with special effects in panels on paper. Draw symbols of this Open
Defiance toward me and my comics.

Status of My Career:
3,000 Pages of Art
3,000 Pages of Literature
Tons of Web Content (Uncounted)
2 Comic Book One-Shots (Comics)
24 Nonfiction Books
6 Short Stories (Novel)
1 Spec Action-Genre Script (TV Animation, Scripts)
7 Consecutive Days Spent Drawing
1 Artbook

You know, Im actually not doing that bad. I seem to be well on my way to reaching my
long term goals of establishing a career for myself through good old fashioned hard work.
I have 1 script and some short stories written, and Ive finished 1 entire comic book
issues, one of them being too short, and the other being not long enough to build a
paperback. But Im well beyond the starting point. EVENTUALLY Ill relocate to LA.
Eventually
Question: Will I find work in comics during this lifetime, while Im STILL ALIVE???
Answer: You will if you work very hard, every day, or at least work UP TO being at that
level.

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Yes! Yes! Im original. Epically original. Innovative and inventive, if I do say so myself.
As a matter of fact, Im a pioneer. I dont feel like I or anyone else has ever seen a show
like mine before.
Writers I like, and what I think of when I see their books:
Tom Clancy:
Military, Strength, Power, Authority, Epic, Prolific, Strategic, Violence, Depth,
Complexity, Warriors, War, Weapons, Supersoldiers.
Mario Puzo:
Crime. Loyalty. Violence, Grittiness, Mafia, Epic, Action, Saga, Trilogy.
Upcoming Word Association Analyses:

Bram Stoker
John Steinbeck
Philip K. Dick
Isaac Asimov
Homer
JRR Tolkien
HP Lovecraft
Robert E. Howard
Michael Moorcock
George Lucas
Arthur C. Clarke

When multitasking as a multi-talent, one thing I need to do is not try to do more than one
thing at a time. I have three main areas of study, about three or four: Comics Pages,
Novels, Scripts, and Storyboards. I can really only do one at a time effectively.

Wednesday, April 25, 2012,

In terms of art progress, innovation, and improvement, Im not just meeting my own
expectations this round. Im surpassing them and going way beyond them! By a mile or
two, in terms of pencil mileage! At this rate, if I keep up the good work and hard won
progress, I predict within the next 5 to 10 years or less, my work might be publishable or
good enough to purchase and acquire in the eyes of publishers and animation producers. I
honestly do feel like its getting there, to an ideal situation. Then its payday, or at least,
thats the idea.

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On a technical level, Im patiently waiting to do my 2+ drawings each day, and so far I

havent gotten fatigued or given up. I seem to be evolving and getting a ton stronger in
my art, and less needy and insecure. I dont even need to show my work to anyone
anymore. Nowadays, showing off my art just feels like a crutch, and a weak insecure one
at that. I dont feel like I need to show people my art just to justify myself creating it and
manifesting it. Sharing isnt in my current job description. Besides, just like it happened
with my birth mothers art, most of my art isnt all that good either. Theres really
nothing to show. Well, actually, there is, but its weak and mediocre. It would get me
laughed out of townagain.
If I keep drawing everyday, for at least a year, even in 1 years time, Ill have done 10x as
much work. Im doing the work of 10 JMs. Im doing 10 times as much work as I used
to.
In the last 9 years, Ive drawn around 150 comic page layouts. Many incredibly shitty
pages, and some that are actually pretty good, with very few, if any, masterworks. But
thats okay. Ill get better with the passage of time, as long as I keep working at it every
day, like I have been. Ive draw what is roughly the equivalent of the Johnny the
Homicidal Maniac Trade Paperback, because the stack of pages can be divided into seven
(20-page-long) one-shots. So, so far Ive done the equivalent of 1 trade paper back of
what is mostly very shitty comic book art, which Im looking to improve, progressively
over time. But I suppose its a matter of quantity more than quality here. Yet again, I
have the quantity, but not the quality. I tend to draw too fast and rush my work, which
results in a rushed and hurried or muddy and sloppy feel. Im going to have to work on
that, on putting more care into my pages. Or else Ill never finish an actual polished book.
If I dont work on improving it will always look like a twelve year old drew it half the
time.
So, Im making headway in all my major areas of pursuit: Im working on pre-production
and regular production for a Comic Book, a Novel, and an Animated TV Series.
Heres the breakdown, the page count:
Comic Book Series: 150 Pages of Work Complete (Layouts)
Novel: 50 Pages of Non-Narrative Manuscript Development Finished
Animated Series Bible: 50 Pages of Pre-Production Finished: Scripts, Models, Outlines,
Story Synopsis
Thats roughly 250 pages of original material, all of it being what is essentially my best
original and creative material, delivered to my brain, directly from the Gods in the
Heavens, which I have committed to paper, unconcerned with real world time and place.
I have scripts, sequential art, and prose fiction pretty much down, even though I need a
lot more pages.

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But I could use some more work on the art direction, character design, choreography,
costume design, lighting concepts, prop design, storyboards, selling strategy, color
scheme, and Voice Cast. Ill just keep adding stuff onto it the way I have been.
So now I have a 250 page document, a large booklet thats 250 pages, which is
essentially turning into my sales portfolio. Or at least, it will be in time, when its more
polished and more complete, and the timing is right. If I let it go too early, it WILL invite
tampering, and Im not sure if tampering is what this situation calls for. Ive invested
everything into the End Times project. Ive come a long way. Ive invested a lot of work,
time, effort, and hyper-focused attention to detail in this bad boy. Now I just got to find
my production design concept art to take back and add to my animation bible.
Current and Newest Goals:
Second 20-page Cartooning One-Shot
22-page Episode Script of Any
Episode 100-200 page Fiction Novel
I knew there would be a lot at stake for a lot of peoplein the long runfor End Times,
my baby, my project, my dream manifested, my career. And indeed there is and was! But
now that Ive done a lot of the work, and foregone the hazards of a lot of what is now
obviously revealed to be a treacherous journey to glory. Ive had time to realize what was
going on underneath the surface. End Times is one of the most powerful concepts or
ideas anywhere, ever, in media history if you ask me. Its epic as any epic and as
dramatic as any theatrical drama, and as action-packed as the most intense action film,
and fantastical as almost any High Fantasy, this side of the Far East or Wild West. It
wasnt until just now when I realized what a Classic and Timeless, Epic Power Struggle I
had gotten myself into with my various rivals in this world, once powerful business
people became aware of what I was doing. Im glad I kept it a secret for so long, but that
too wore off eventually. To me, its primarily more about self-actualization than raw
power, even though theres plenty of both there. To me, Power creates self-actualization,
but also generates profit, which in turn equals money, which translates to survival for me.
But thats just my take on it.

Thursday, April 26, 2012,

Everything I have goes into each of my comics and multimedia projects. A job for me
isnt just a job. Its a lifestyle. Its not just a job. Its a way of life. Its a way of living
from day to day.

Well, I discovered a certain comic book trade secret this afternoon: The thing known as
Spotting blacks. Formerly referred to by me as Notan, Film Noir, Black Overlap (Bruce
Timm model sheet term), and silhouettes. Other than costume design, layering my full
page compositions with spotted blacks is hands down my strongest area. But the truth is

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spotting blacks is VERY common in indie and manga comics. Its just most people arent
aware it has a name, or more specifically, names. Todd McFarlane, Bruce Timm, Jhonen
Vasquez, Frank Miller, Mike Mignola, the DC school of comics and animation: All have
mastery and expertise over spotting blacks, just like me. This is exciting for me. I could
spend all day, every day, for years on end doing nothing but spotting blacks.
I just practiced doing some background spotting of blacks this afternoon. Worked out
pretty well.

Things to consider about the drawing process:

1.
2.
3.
4.
5.
6.
7.
8.
9.

Picking up a pencil
Picking up a pen
Holding a pencil or pen
Putting a pencil or pens point on a piece of paper
Moving the pencil/pens point across the paper
Creating one line,
Creating multiple lines
Creating 2-dimensional shapes on paper with a pen-pencil
Watching those lines and shapes build up to drawings and art

Ive become aware some in the media can read my thoughts by analyzing the writing I
put down on my computer. Its the law of attraction amplified. Any negative thought can
be potentially hazardous. So proceed with caution. Be careful. People arent just paying
attention. Theyre hacking into my mind and trying to stay one step ahead of me on a
spiritual level, not just a physical, psychological, and emotional one.

Sometimes when a person gets what they want more than anything else in the world, they
feel lost. Being lost is a side effect of achieving life goals. Its easy to deviate from the
path, if youre already reached the end of part of that path.
Im taking the day off. And so ends my 11 day winning streak of drawing for 11
consecutive days in a row. The marathon I was running has been interrupted for a day (so
far).
My YouTube Animation Invention kicks ass! Im such a genius.
Thought of a new invention a day or two ago. Im such a video engineering genius! I do
things with digital video that no one else does or knows how to do. But its childs play to
me.

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Liberty BASIC: Programming Online

Finally, someone designed and built a Online Basic Programming Language Interpreter
Programming interpreter for video: FESI
Video Player: Miro
--------Monday, April 30, 2012,
Silicon Valley attracts the best of the best
Forbes Magazine
Thats awesome. Technically that makes me officially one of the Best of the Best
according to Forbes! The 00.00000001%. How awesome is that!? My first patent attorney
who helped me with attempting to file my first patent attempt works for HP (HewlettPackard), which is an iconic Silicon Valley tech manufacturing company of computer
hardware. Im definitely a fan of Silicon Valley and hope to maybe live there or at least
visit some day as a tourist.
Mark Zuckerberg is a good example of young entrepreneurshipYoung Money. The
hard thing to believe is hes a year younger than me, and hes a multibillionaire already. I
want to be a billionaire too one day, but it probably wont be through a website. It will be
through manufacturing, engineering, software, home electronics, hardware, or
digital filmmaking, or maybe even animation! Streamwave Software, and the software
architecture its made ofwhich I built the prototype for single-handedly on Windows
Media Player and made understructure diagrams for with Java file management
softwarewas my first serious attempt at selling something. Im more like Bill Gates
than Mark Zuckerberg. Perhaps a mixture of those two and George Lucas / Katsuhiro
Otomo / Dave Sim / Osamu Tezuka / and Disney. But Im closer to Mark Zuckerberg in
looks and age.
Heres how it breaks down, by industry.
Mark ZuckerbergWebsite
Bill GatesSoftware Steve
JobsHardware Steve
WozniakComputer Chad
HurleyWeb Video
Reed HastingsStreaming Video
Anthony WoodDigital Video

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These are some of the only names you ever really need to know if youre going into
media and tech and doing what I do.
Im considering filing for future patents without the assistance of a patent attorney next
time. Im going to teach myself how to file for a patent without a patent attorney.
Attorneys are really, really expensive. I might be able to save myself some money that
way.

I do sort of have a plan. Im going to conceptualize and develop software concepts, and
Ill hire programmers to build the software, then Ill license it to large and/or small
software distributors. Im a software developer-inventor. Im probably going to be
working with programmers a lot. Finally! Something Im good at! Developing software.
Im pretty influential. If I become successful at cartooning and/or business and
technology in the future, my influence will be amazingly vast. Well, if my theories about
YouTube anime are correct, I already am pretty influential.
Since Im already pretty knowledgeable about software and use software nearly
everyday, software developer as a vocation just sort of feels right. I never would have
expected to be able to handle such a job, but the more I investigate and analyze it the
more I realize how well suited I am for this job. And it pays royalties!
Ways to make money. Types of Jobs:

Patent Licenser
Software Developer-Licensor
Underground Cartoonist
Screenwriter
Film Editor
Novelist
Animation Producer-Developer
TV Animation Art Director
Character-Costume Designer
Lighting Concept Artist
Conceptual Artist
Marketing Director
Gambling
Social Security
----------

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Tuesday, May 1st, 2012

I've watched episode 1, the Premiere Ep of Motorcity 3 times so far. It's the future of
American animation! Powerful, intense, loud, heavy, and Black As Hell. Just as good as
Invader Zim and Megas XLR, and Avatar, and Boondocks, maybe even a lot better. Who
knew American animation could be so visually powerful in terms of stylized design. The
only shows that can really rival Motorcity, visually, are Tron: Uprising ("Coming Soon"),
Spawn, and Star Wars: The Clone Wars. Japan not included in this equation. When the
characters of Motorcity are driving their cars, there is a certain kind of extreme digital
foreshortening used that I've never seen used before. The crew of Motorcity, in particular,
Creator, Writer, and Executive Producer Chris Prynoski, who I spoke to on Twitter today
(lucky me, it was an honor), is inventing entirely new techniques, types of digital and
Flash animation that can be used for television, and is inventing an entirely new type of
production process for cinematic AND TV animation for television that I've never seen
before. Motorcity, is Disney returning to its roots as an innovative leader in animation
production worldwide with shows like Motorcity and Tron: Uprising. It's clearly doing
things with animation that are returning the company to a player in the innovation game
of animation, something it's always done in Feature films, but hasn't done in the medium
of Television, much, if ever. Clearly (as I can sense) Disney Television Animation, with
sister shows Tron: Uprising and Motorcity, is doing something with animation it's
probably secretly wanted to do for a long time, which is: "Bring back the quality to their
animation". Well, that and do a science-fantasy and science-fiction genre series with a lot
of Blade Runner style architecture, traffic line design, and spotted blacks. You'll notice
Disney hasn't done much science-fiction until just now. Not of Blade Runner Warner
Brothers-caliber yet anyway. But I can definitely see that as the one form of genre
Disney's always wanted to do well, but never got around to, maybe because no other
potential SF films look this good. I'm a fan of Walt Disney the person, and I'm no
channeler of thoughts from the deceased, and I don't know what a guy like John
Lasseter's opinion is on this, but I suspect even he might agree, if Walt Disney the Person
was alive today, even though he primarily made animation paying tribute to C.S. Lewis
(out of other candidates like Tolkien and Philip K Dick, which is more historically
Japanese and TV territory in animation history) and if Disney were to be alive past the
60s and watch the films of Star Wars and Blade Runner, I'm sure he'd personally approve
of shows like Motorcity and Tron: Uprising. He'd also approve of stuff like The
Nightmare Before Christmas, Pulp Fiction, and The Sixth Sense (all produced by Disney
related subsidiaries, I might add. Seeing a pattern emerge here). All as Black and Noirish
or Expressionist or horror based as the midnight sky, all masterpieces of exactly what
Walt Disney stood for in his lifetime: Art. Just cuz it's a black backdrop doesn't mean
Disney the Filmmaker wouldn't approve, especially in the last 3 decades. They partially
have Titmouse (who's also worked with Cartoon Network, Adult Swim, and
Nickelodeon) to thank for this one on Motorcity at least. But since Disney's the producer,
I suppose I could do them the favor of giving Disney the benefit of the doubt and
including them in the Titmouse equation. Disney liked art, and Gothic and Dystopian and
SF Epics like Akira are exactly what Disney WOULD do if he were still making films
and TV, NOT rainbow striped pre-school shows. But still, what's going on with Disney
Television Animation and the two aforementioned shows are exactly what Disney should

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be. You're welcome, John Lasseter. In the 1960s, if you look at Batman's first TV Series
with Adam West, clearly if Disney was alive at that time he got the wrong impression of
Batman (Codename Batman). He didn't have the pleasure of surviving long enough to see
Bruce Timm, Frank Miller's, Greg Capullo, Jim Lee's, Todd McFarlane's, and Tim
Burton's gothic-noir-expressionist visions of Batman, which are beautiful and
progressive. He would have definitely approved. But when Batman debuted on TV, it
was WAY too Disney. Now Disney is way "too" Batman. But you can NEVER be TOO
Batman. Batman is Japanese level cool to American viewers and readers. Ask any
American who's cool and you'll see. In the 60s, Batman was too Disney. In the New
Millenium, Disney is pure Batman. See how things suddenly reversed. But the latter
works. The former ("Batman Doing Disney") doesn't. Disney films weren't gritty, but
that's because Bruce Timm and Erik Radomski weren't born or old enough yet to show
Disney that animation SHOULD be gritty. He makes quite the persuasive argument.

P a g e | 413

Parallax is good enough to pitch to a network by now. Actually, if you ask me, it has
been for a long time. So, without further ado, next level planning:

Illustrative Promotional Artwork done digitally

Digital Artwork
Photoshop and Flash Animation Demo Reel and Portfolios
Pitch Bible (in development)
Scene Scripts (Scripting individual "short story script scenes")
I'm going to work on dividing my episodes and saga up into segments, Jhonen-Nny style!
Animation Magazine 2012 Pitch Party
Staying friends with Chris Prynoski and Steve Blum

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If it takes 20 years to get End Times on air, so be it. It will be worth the wait.
Shift of Focus: PITCH PARTY.
I might be entering Animation Magazine's PITCH PARTY 2012. If I have the energy. If
this is true, I'm going to be retreading a lot of material I already have, which hasn't been
seen by anyone.

Wednesday, May 2, 2012,

While my main medium is traditional, I do own Adobe Flash CS4 Professional software,
which I bought with my own money. It wasn't until yesterday when watching Motorcity
for the 3rd time, contemplating that shows demo reels that were on the internet that I
learned the potential of Flash software for not just YouTube videos, but also digitaltraditional animation. And since I put all that money into it and own it, why not tool
around in it, mess around with the setting, read tutorials, and essentially teach myself
how to animate and lay out animation scenes with backgrounds-characters using Flash. If
it's good enough for Chris Prynoski (who's huge in the TV animation world) it's good
enough for me. I want to focus on integrating traditionally drawn, and digitally scanned
ink and pencil character animation and backgrounds and frames with digital animation
techniques, like making the forms flow. I'll be buying some books on this very subject in
the next month or two after I buy my external DVD Drive.
OK, I spent 8 1/2 to 9 entire hours, or a whole day and evening, working without
stopping on my very first piece of Flash Animation, a Mono-centric piece. A Flash Demo
Animatic, of Mono riding a Chopper with dual blades sticking out the sides. See above
piece and YouTube page. I actually worked up the nerve to make it a public video on
YouTube. I'm not expecting it to be a hit. I just want it up so someone can see it, feel that
energy and intensity. It is pretty intense. I made the camera intentionally shaky to add
that extra aura of energy, as the Animation Director-Producer and Storyboard Artist.
Why am I doing all this. Well, I'm planning on putting full energy into my pitch for the
Pitch Party. It's going to be a blast. I can network with Executives and have my ideas and
pitch for a show seen by a ton of people. Who else can give an opportunity like that for
me BUT Animag??
My work pace has turned into something quietly and steadily charging along at 1,000
Miles Per Hour! Finally I'm working at the pace I envisioned myself working at. 8 hour
unpaid work days spent hunched over Adobe Flash software on my laptop. This is the life
I dreamed. But I'm living it now. Less time tweeting and blogging, and more time
working on animation reels. That's pretty cool! This is what working in animation is like!
It IS 8 hour days. And I owe it all to that inspiring show Motorcity and the inspiring
words, websites, and tweets the show's creator left me with, directly in some instances.
That's a dream come true. I'm interacting directly, in a public form with one of the top
talents in modern TV Animation. And I'm developing and executing high class
presentations for actual industry Executives who could very well buy one of my ideas

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some day, or at the very least I get some valuable life experience. I'm already starting to
develop calluses on my thumb from being and working at the computer for so long. I've
done enough talking and rough drawing. I want to go for the polish, energy, and shine.
Finally.
Thursday, May 3, 2012,
Animation Magazine Stats:
Subscriber and Readership Print Circulation: 20,000
Online Circulation: 100,000
Total Circulation, 120,000
Distributed in 100 Countries
Through email and participating in the 11th Annual Pitch Party,
I have 2 contacts with the animation journalism media now, who work at a trade mag.
Ramin Zahed,
the Editor in Chief of Animation Magazine (California)
(Ramin@animationmagazine.net)
&
Sheri Shelton,
Account Executive of Ad Sales, Animation Magazine (California)
(sshelton@animationmagazine.net)
Direct Line: +818 665 2050
Office: +818-883-2884
Skype: sheri91360
There. Have a rough layout finished.
From this point on, it's refining the character designs in this piece, and cleaning up the
background with ink.
One of the judges specializes in European Co-Productions. I wonder how much he knows
about French and Asian co-productions. He runs the co-production department of a
German based network called Ki.KA.

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Friday, May 4th, 2012,

Whatever I don't know about the world, comics, animation, and media business, I seem
to be on the right path to finding out. I could roll the dice and take my chances in
animation, or I could stay in Florida, and work on art to submit to the museum Chris' wife
works at. My call. Either way, things appear to be shaping up a bit more.
Wow, people really are singling me (and a few others) out aren't they. Impressive. Most
impressive.
Things NOT to do:

Don't tell people who you know, especially when those people are famous, iconic,
and talented.

Don't tell people what you plan on doing unless you've already done all the work.

Don't Say what projects your worked on in the past. Don't make others envious.

Don't talk about the places you've been to. People are political and biased.

Don't say what you do for a living, or who you're real friends are.

Don't say how much money you have or make, or talk about how successful you
are.
-----

I could even make money from the museum offer Chris made to me.
I can't STAND to see my top hero Todd McFarlane go broke and file Chapter 11. He just
got out of total bankruptcy after all the lawsuits he faced. Why do so many people dislike
Todd nowadays? It's like he's me or something. Well, at least he's doing well online.
----Saturday, May 5th, 2012,
My art standing is similar to that of Moebius. I've influenced many Japanese anime
designers and animators and storymen, even if my names not in the credits, the influence
through them seeing my work on the web is still there.
I got my Animag contract in the mail today, which I will be reading and signing. Well,
email anyway. Turns out I really am gonna be in the running for the PITCH PARTY
contest, 2012. Good thing I already started drafting the art 2 days ago. Once my entry is
officially submitted, Executives from The Hub, Cartoon Network, KI.KA, and PBS will

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be judging and reviewing my entry. I'm not expecting to win. All I'm really hoping for is
valuable feedback. Selling something to someone, a network is kind of a supreme bonus
though. And on top of that, if you or are a runner up you get press coverage and the
privilege of having your work seen by over 120,000 people in 100 countries for a whole
month, and you get to become a part of Animag history.
---But what do I want to rule animation and comics and the internet for. I'm ALREADY
related to European Royalty, in real life. I'm the ancestor of British and French Royalty.
Kings and Princes. I just wasn't aware that I was related to real-life Royalty until now.
And to think, earlier in my life everyone called me "a loser, faggot, pedophile, terrorist,
worthless, full of himself, and arrogant". Of course none of the people saying that are
even slightly aware I am a Blue Blood by way of my Birth Father, whose ancestors
belong to the same Gene Pool. I don't know if I'm actually a Prince, or qualify as a
Knight or Prince, but my ancestors would know. Yeah, you better run. You better respect
and recognize me and my skill! I'm of Royal British and French Blood.
I'm not worried about Power anymore. Money? I've got barely any. Power on the other
hand. I've got plenty of that, even if society in America (including my own parents) is
attempting to thwart it 24/7, which they are. That just makes it shine brighter every social
and cultural opportunity I get. When you're a distant relative of British Royalty like
William the Conqueror, you don't have to answer to ANYBODY. You've got All The
Power in the World. You have the Power of Europe and Ancient European Ancestry and
History. Bill Gates may have all the financial power in the world. But even he can't touch
me, as I'm related to Monks and Royalty. My life is Epic. Epic and Great. Epically Great.
But I've still got to start from the bottom. I've got a TV animation industry contest to
enter.
"I don't know, I have to discuss it with your father." Peggy said.
"But mom. Dad's NOT a God, he has no place playing God with my fate. He's a small
fry." I said.
"I'LL TALK. TO YOUR FATHER."
"But He CAN'T TALK TO ME THAT WAY! I'm a DESCENDANT OF BRITISH
ROYALTY. He's NOT! HE'S A COMMONER WITH NO BLOODLINE. I'M NOT!"
Peggy glared at me. "Don't START that again. We have guests over!" she lectured.
"Y'know, what EVER!" I said, furiously.
It's tough to evade bullying. I've been bullied by the biggest, baddest, meanest bully of
all. My own adoptive father. He IS a bully, just like my adoptive brother. I'm just going
to have to find a way to progress past him. He's an ignorant man, who has a deep seated
abusive nature toward his own children, and really lays it on thick with the verbal and
emotional abuse.

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Screw giving my shit to people for free online. From now on, I'm ALL About the
paywalls and the paid content. I have a large enough audience. You want my content.
Sorry, you gotta pay money to be entertained, just like anywhere else. If my content is in
demand, which it is, it wouldn't surprise me if they did start paying for my content. Pay
for my writing/art/videos and general content, or you're getting a big, fat Nothing. Sorry,
I have to eat too, just like all the other trashy entertainers.
Why does Twitter encourage everyone to BE LAZY and SLACK OFF. Man, most
writers and artists are so LAZY. L-A-Z-Y. Lazy. All Twitter really lets you do is promote
your projects and slack off by writing nonsense. No real writing gets done on Twitter
most of the time. Sites like DeviantART and Twitter and Blogger are no indicator of how
good of an artist you are, let alone writer. Writers and artists beware.
Dear Joseph,
STOP SLACKING ONLINE....AND GET BACK TO WORK!!!!
CLEAN UP THIS HOUSE, GET THAT SHORT STORY AND NOVEL WRITTEN,
WRITE THAT SCRIPT, AND FINISH DRAWING THOSE GODDAMN COMICS!!!!
NO HEADLINE IS GOING TO TELL YOU TO DO THAT!!!! GET BACK TO
FUCKING WORK!!!!!!
I'm all about building a mythos vortex to another world out of thin air. Building a castle
out of sand? I'm all for that!
You know, I've got a good thing going here on Blogger, the Adult Swim Boards,
Twitter, Adsense, and YouTube. Part of me thinks that's pretty cool, and is intimidated by
moving onto work that actually pays well, and demands real work. Such confusing
feeling. People like and respect me on those sites. They talk about me, and pay attention
to me. Giving that up to pursuit a corporate Hollywood or Silicon Valley Job. Well, yes I
could buy anything I want, but there's more to life than money! I just know there is!
In my life, it's The Internet vs. Revised Creative and Professionally Distributed Work.
It's The Real World vs. An Internal Mythos World.
Using Twitter and Blogger and ASMB is easier than working all day on a word processor
bangin' out stories. How much easier? A LOT easier. Doesn't take any real talent or effort
at all. You just crank out a one liner, and BOOM, you're good to go. I can do something
THAT easy in a mere matter of seconds. Actual real writing takes an actual real amount
of time, and its prerequisite is a considerable amount of effort. I'm not good at doing
nothing, therefore I don't fit in at Twitter quite like I probably should. It's TOO easy to
make money on Twitter. Give me an Adsense account on that sucker and I'm good to go.

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Creative and Intellectual Business Projects that Have Kept Me Busy in 2011-2012

First Instance of Seeking a Patent w/ Silicon Valley Patent Attorney (2011)

(Tech)
Amazon Self-Published CreateSpace Artbook /Marketing Project (2012)
(Literature/Art)
Animag Pitch Party Contest (2012) (Animation, Media)
Museum Space (?) (2012) (Art)

Well, when you consider the fact that some very important people believe me to be an
actual real-life blue-blood straight out of England, Joseph, Descendant of real life
Nobility and Warriors, I don't find it surprising in the least that I'm writing epic narratives
and experiments in literature about Kings, Knights, and general Warriors. Epic warfare is
in my genealogy on many levels, from China, to France, to England, all from ancient
civilizations. My career and choice of subject matter makes a lot more sense to me when
I present it in that light. My family history is epic. Is it really such a surprise the saga of
my life leaks into the saga of my fiction. But is Mono me, or is he William the
Conqueror? I don't know, and in some ways, I don't care. As long as I get to write great
epic stories and tell tales of epic sagas in literary form, I'm happy.
Yep, that's definitely a "skeleton in my closet". I'm secretly a descendent of one of the
most powerful and mighty Noblemen in the history of 9th Century British Politics:
William The Conqueror. If that's not power...Well, that is power. I Am Power. An you
will know me by the Trail of the Dead and Blood, Death, and Fire I leave in my Wake.
Maybe I Should Have gone into Politics. Oh well, I can Create My Own Government
(And Military) and Constitution and Declaration of World Independence (on the page).
Nosferatu, the reviled Satanic Cult-Terrorist Leader from Hell, shall experience his
Greatest Moment, when he is Beheaded in a Public Execution, British Parliament Style,
and sent back to the Fiery Pitts of Hell, where he belongs and is His Black Soul is
Reclaimed by Lucifer. That is one of my Favorite Future Moments of Parallax and End
Times. Don't know if the censors will allow it, but I'm gonna try anyway. A fitting death
for a Man who Killed So Many, Ruthlessly and with No Compassion or Love in His
Heart. Just the Burning Rage of Lonely Emptiness. You know, the whole "Not having a
real soul" thing and being the Spawn of Satan, destined to send fear into the spines of
Billions of Innocent people. I'm sending him out, Genghis Khan style. Yeah, I'm gonna
kill him GOOD.

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Chapter 2

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Friday, May 11th, 2012,
I fail at art A LOT. But I try a lot. I need to fail at art. Failure is a necessary part of growth and
development. I need to keep failing, for failure is the only thing that teaches us how to be good and
evolve, through failure, which teaches us through experience. My initial stack of art and writing has been
built on failure and failures.

I've kind of been building up a silent desire to write about history. My family tree has so much history in
it that it almost seems kind of pointless resisting it nowadays. The older you get, the more comfort you
will probably feel with history, as history has wisdom and experience, which equals power.

So, now I'm running, 4 blogs, a twitter, and a YouTube, is it?

I can worry about discipline for my art process Later. In the mean time, I have to focus all my energy to
mastering the international animation contest I seem to have ended up in, which will be guaranteed to be
witnessed by 120,000 loyal readers in 100 countries. That will be the biggest direct audience my design
work has ever been in front of. No pressure.

I'm not in the BUSINESS of adult animation anymore. Shows like Spawn. In one sense, they served as an
early model for my production design, and lighting, and character design perspective. But I'm not in the
business of ADULT Animation anymore. Adult comics like Jhonen and Otomo, yes, but NOT adult
animation. It doesn't sell, it doesn't make millions of dollars from merchandise, and you can't sell it to a
network and make a cash cow out of it like anime shows such as Naruto and Motorcity.
What I didn't realize was, the only reason in making Spawn: Animated when McFarlane turned down all
the kiddie cartoon people to market Spawn as a mature animation show, was because he could afford to.
He was already rich. He's already got multi millions of dollars in his bank account, and he sealed the deal
a long time ago, with the Spawn comic book. Me I don't have that luxury. I'll sell to the first buyer or
interested party that comes along, within reason. Phil warned me it would be easier to go the TMNT
licensing route with Mono, and he was so very right. I just needed time to realize his monied wisdom.

Famous things the world associates with blue blood heritage:

Auteur
British Engineering
Genghis Kahn
William The Conqueror
Mongolian Empire
British Monarchy
Detroit Auto Industry

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Trappist Monks
Museums
Romanticism

If I'm living alone, and I travel in the future, and am rich and famous, I WILL be hiring international
Executive Bodyguards, due to how dangerous people are. You can't trust people, people are irrational and
dangerous. People, including media people, are out to do me in and want to see harm and failure come to
me. Therefore I shall hire protection. And a lawyer. Air security. Why don't all planes have security
guards? Would 9-11 even happen if commercial jets had air marshals?

I have an army of evil Twins. I'm going to study the concept of evil twins and write about said topic,
extensively. I'm an expert at dealing with evil twins. I've had over 10+ years experience in dealing with
my own real life evil twins.

I love choreography, but I haven't mastered it. I fully respect the martial arts and choreography, but I don't
entirely grasp them yet. I have a handful of favorite choreographers: John Kreng, Yuen Woo-Ping,
Jackie Chan, John Woo, Tony Jaa, Jet Li, Corey Yuen, Ang Lee.
I bring a certain amount of aggression, eloquence, violence, and rowdiness to my animation work. I fully
accept this fact now. I'm a street smart kid. Considering I live right around the streets, should that really
surprise anybody, that I'm streetwise.
Apparently, that's all I needed all along was a nice, safe, beautiful, quiet place and house to work in. I just
needed some beauty and peace to stimulate my workdays. That and a room with a view. I'll settle for this.
Well, that and TV shows and cartoons from the 90s on Regular TV, instead of all that disrespectful new
stuff that doesn't improve anything or add anything, that you don't give a shit what happens to the
characters. You give a shit about 90s characters and 80s characters in animation. You don't give a shit
about "Ed, Edd, n' Eddy" or "Drake and Josh". They started that whole "movement" of unlikeable
characters. Bowel Movement, that is.
Sunday, May 13, 2012,
If I had $1 million that I made from tech, writing, or drawing, it would be game over, If I got rich off of
my creative and intellectual work, I'd probably stop working. The only reason I keep working is because
no one pays me. If I suddenly started getting paid and could afford to buy things, I'd quit working, quit
drawing, and just sit on my ass and do nothing. Something tells me being idle isn't all that bad, especially
when you're rich and can buy comics and DVDs. I'd like to pretend if I had a lot of money from creative
work that I'd be all noble like, and keep working, but chances are, if I was as rich as Stephen King,
chances I might never do creative work again...

Technically, I've earned $30 from YouTube and Blogger through Adsense.

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One way to get a lot of hits on blogger is by owning a lot of different blogs. I manage and author 4 blogs.
My Manifesto Blog, My Essays Blog, My Poetry Blog, and My Daily Blog. Once Manifesto, Essays, and
Poetry are completed, if they ever are, Adsense could potentially pay a lot if people actually read all my
different blogs.
The best advice I can give to someone dealing with a real life evil clone Bryan Johnston engineered evil
twin epidemic, who want to put a stop to it, is either call up private investigators and report what you've
noticed and describe what you've been through to the investigators, like I did, or better yet, hire the P.I.,
and send him a photograph of yourself and your portrait so he can monitor the media for strange
occurrences and unexplained phenomena. Part of why identity theft is so hard to fight is because it isn't as
tangible and concrete as other occurrences, like traditional theft, and murder, where there's tangible
forensic evidence to monitor and investigate, unless you have a photograph they can use to monitor
likeness of your images, which can curtail smear campaigns and doppelgangers and evil twins. Glad I put
a stop to that.

Well, at long last, the Aquabats have gotten a show of their own on TV. The Super Show. And it only
took em' 11 years! They'd been saying they'd have a show all along, but apparently no one listened. Till
they HAD one. I'm listening to some of my favorite Aquabats tracks on my Sony Digital Media Player as
I write this entry about them. I'm one of their biggest fans. And most zealous supporters. I'm one of the
thousands of Aqua Cadets. GO Aquabats GO! On your Super Show!
Things I ordered from Amazon yesterday: Jhonen Vasquez National Design Triennial, Peter S. Beagle's
Secret History of Fantasy, Psyren manga Volume 1, The Best of HP Lovecraft, Berserk manga: Volume
1, External DVD-RW Drive
As a Scorpio and INTP, I have many secrets. One of my better ones is that, according to my real last
name, I'm a blue blood, and am a descendent of British and French Royalty. Part of me doesn't want to
keep that a secret and sort of wants to milk it for all it's worth. Another part wants to just keep it to myself
for now. The secretive part. And since I'm related to royalty and holiness in real life, cuz of my dad, I
have to start thinking like holiness and royalty. No more rash moves and decisions. I'm not interacting
with people on anything resembling a normal or unimportant level. Maybe I shouldn't even BE online. A
lot of people would just want my power-status if they knew who I really was. I don't mind being
criticized. Tons of people criticized me in the beginning. But that's probably because they don't know who
I am in reality, and therefore don't respect me because they think I'm like the steaming masses.
New Storyline for Parallax: Shadow Op 7 vs. The New-Earth Drug Lords.

I've heard some artists say you should develop comics page series before you develop style, which is an
obvious sign that particular artist doesn't work in animation in reality, in term of his adaptations. BUT,
hey, I listen to everybody, so why not him too....I guess.
Anyway, better advice than that is you should draw and linger on all the art subject matter that come
easily and naturally to you as an artist. For me, it's fight poses, impact, weapons, costumes, screenwriting,

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character design, spotting blacks, and cityscapes. So I'm going to stay with those things. Master what I've
already mastered. Yeah, why not
In drawing and fiction writing, you need to only draw what comes easily to you. Something always will if
you're any good.

Daily and semi-daily tasks:

Making the Effort to draw at least 3 drawings every day (I did 18 new pages today)
Updating people with my Tweets
Writing in my journal here
Updating and writing in my 3 blogs
Managing my YouTube Channel and Account
Exercising in jogging and the martial arts

There's three main steps for producing a commercial comic book

1. Design, drawing, writing, production, and submission to editors/agents, sale, (Difficulty Level:
Hard)
2. Editing, erasing, white out, computer editing or erasing, and revisions, Editor's duties (level:
Medium)
3. Taking Responsibility, Marketing, Distributing, Selling, Fandom, Conventions (level: Scary,
Easy)
Art is a daily struggle for the fate of my success. For me at least, it never does get any easier
Copying storyboard layouts and thumbnail compositions from each camera shot a cable TV
network airs is actually a pretty good idea of mine.
Drawing doesn't ever get easier. It's always going to be hard, torturous, and difficult. It will always
cause anxiety, unfair competition, cheating in others, fretting over not being good enough or failing,
and plain old stress. My mechanical pencil and the number 2 will always feel like they have a
weight training invisible gravity-"enhancing" device on them, where the sheer pressure of my
drawing process makes it incredibly hard and take a lot of strength to do something as simple as
lifting up a pencil and applying it to the page. It is my curse. Once that feeling, the weighted and
high pressure weight training pencil feeling, goes away, and the pencil feels light and free again,
drawing might get easier. I wouldn't count on it ever becoming all that easier overall though.
Walking and jogging on the treadmill helps with overcoming the fatigue of "Pencil Weight
Training Weight Lifting" Syndrome. It did today, after I got some exercise of walking and martial
aerobics in today and yesterday with shoes on for the treadmill. Fatigue is one of a conceptual
artist's worst enemies. It's caused by depression (manic-depression), ADD, high mental
performance, having intelligence and creativitiy, and not staying in shape or exercising.

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Cartoonist Portraiture is now definitely one of my strong points. I've actually gotten sort of good at
drawing faces and heads. As long as I keep drawing more portraiture, I can't see that turning
against me. Technically, I inherited the skill from my birth mom.
The best art I can do at any given moment is the best art I can do at any given moment. The best
art I do now (at the moment) is the best of what I can do, PERIOD. There's no such thing as
drawing better or worse than the best. There's how you draw now, RIGHT now, and that IS your
best. Period. End of story. My best actually turned out to be pretty strong around the 9 p.m. hour.
My power level on my paper meter is at 50% currently. It can only reach 100% once a day, During the
day.
Percentage of Graphic Novel Completed: 20%--30% complete
Percentage of Regular Floppy issue Completed: 1 page = 5%. 3 out of 20 pages finished = 25% complete
Each page of polished or detailed sequential art = 5%. 20 Pages = 100%, Whole Issue.
1 page, 5% at a time.

10 20-page chapters = 1 Novel

Or 20 10 page Chapters = 200 pages
I'm going to write the first draft in the same style I write my journals in, one sentence or a few paragraphs
at a time, then mark each segment with a line, or at least a couple small lines.

Ideas thunk up today:

Short story: The Sitter
Script Scene Outlines for Parallax: Drug Lords
The only daily work missing here is comics page. But I did get 19 pgs of Sketches drawn. So not a total
loss.
Because my daily work is subdivided into 3 forms of work: Short Stories, Scripts, and Comics Pages.
It is true. I am a 28 (going on 29) year old, unemployed reclusive loner living in a Orlando suburb with
his parents. I have a similar isolated nature to that of JD Salinger, Howard Hughes, and Emily Dickinson.
I'm an underground celebrity, just like Jack Kerouac was in his day. But I'm also a prolific author, diarist,
inventor, writer, artist, and cartoonist. I live an unusual life. And I'll probably never marry. I might never
even be a virgin my whole life as well. Which wouldn't surprise me. I don't believe in paying money for
sex. I'm against that. I don't value sex, at all really, therefore why would I put a price on it?

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As for being a loner. One of the loner author's favorite topics is allegorical loners. And solitude. I made
Mono a loner. And many of my worlds and neighborhoods, and cities I create have a ghost town vibe to
them. We loners like writing about solitude. It is our muse.
My grasp of science and technology is primarily intuitive, not all that academic, with rare exceptions. I
taught myself the majority of what I know.
Favorite science topics:

Pressure
Kinetic Energy
Time-space
Relativity
Astronomy
Cosmology
Integral Philosophy
Existentialism
Ontology
Phenomenology
Electricity
Digital Media File Management
Systematism
Engineering
Architecture
Architectonics
Aerodynamics
Social Science
Computers
Inventions

Tuesday, May 15th, 2012,

If I want to keep my career intact, I need to keep my mouth closed, online and off.
I wonder how much creating a franchise property for a $1 billion multimedia corporation pays. I don't
know if I'm ready to start making money yet. But I do know I'd love to find work. I'm not counting on
getting rich, from the internet or anywhere else. But it would be nice to have some money. Something
tells me I'll soon have more money than I can spend. My money sense is tingling.
Outside of this contest, my design work doesn't seem good enough for anybody. The comics and manga
people think "It isn't detailed enough" and yet with some of the fans for animation they think it's "too
detailed". So which one is it?

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No blogging, tweeting, or offline computer journal typing about my newest activities. Code of Silence,
just like the patent time period.
The best of what I can do NOW is the very best of what I can do, period.

Wednesday, May 16th, 2012,

Things the internet doesn't do:

Earn you respect

Make you famous or rich or powerful
Give you a job
Pay you
Provide for yourself or family
Be trustworthy
Do your work for you
Make your life any easier than it was BEFORE the internet.

Thursday, May 17th, 2012

Got some books in the mail today. The Psyren and Berserk manga.
And I got 2 anthologies (one fantasy and one dark fantasy), the first being a short story anthology edited
by Peter S. Beagle of Last Unicorn fame. The book includes stories by Stephen King, Peter S. Beagle,
Neil Gaiman, and T.C. Boyle.
The other book was a short story anthology of Weird Fiction and Dark Fantasy by H.P. Lovecraft.
I would berate myself for not doing enough channeling of my literary pursuits into my own original
fiction, but the thing is, I should probably be focusing on the task at hand, which would be the post I'm at
work on.
"Why go the Kevin Eastman and Peter Laird TMNT / Lowell Cunningham MIB licensing route and sell
merch and videogames and such?"? Ha! More like why not go that route and sell out. Beats working in
the salt mines. Will anyone really be all that bothered if I lighten up and censor myself a bit?

There. Survived That little Handful of Evil Widely-Publicized Ordeals. And now I'm back, with a beard.
Turns out it did pay off in the end for me. Just a few more years of hard work and I'm as good as God. Or
is that Gold?

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I'm the creator of my concepts. The bottom line to that is, I still get paid a creator's royalty and percentage
of net profits, whether I'm involved in daily operations or not. I've done my work. I still get paid a heroes
fee. That tends to happen when you CREATE and DESIGN things professionally. And I CAN sell my TV
experience using my award-eligible web broadcasting experience online as a qualifying characteristic. All
this experience running websites and Video Broadcasts online must count for something. The internet is
where I honed my creative and managerial skill that will likely transfer over into my role as a producer of
traditional TV. Honestly, I'd rather be a Creative Visual Literary Pre-Production Consultant than an
Executive Producer. That way I can work from home, my bedroom, which is where I have been working
previously. Doing a show from my bedroom, on a Mac laptop? Is that risky? Is there any risk involved in
that? Setting up an office in my house.
If I get a deal with a group of producers, Dad agreed to share his home office space with me. This room,
the office across the hall from the kitchen, will be my Teleconferencing Room. There's no need to
showcase my infamous, cluttered room. My room doesn't give off the vibe of a real office. Dad's office
and computer room does, so I'm moving in.

Friday, May 18, 2012

The Status of my 2012 Pitch Party Animation Magazine ad submission is: Complete. Completed around
10:42 p.m. on a Friday night (this evening). It's looking hella fierce, and I'm very enthusiastic about my
chances of being of an adequate quality to reach whatever level it is I'm hoping to reach.

Saturday, May 19th, 2012,

Now that my project is handed in for the most part and completed in my house, I can probably sit back
and relax now, once I get the Final Draft to the Advertising Executive at Animag. She seemed pretty
happy with what I've shown here regarding my project so far. Great to know.
My Animation-Centric Career:

Meeting and getting an autograph from Todd McFarlane and Dave Sim at Megacon, in Florida
Lessons with Phil Ferretti
Meeting and getting an autograph from John Lasseter
Studying for a Bachelor of Science in Media Arts and Animation at the Art Institute of Ft.
Lauderdale
Being Fairly well known as Spindack on the [adult swim] message boards
Trading emails with Corey Jackson, Jhonen Vasquez, and Steve Blum
Trading Instant Messages on Yahoo with Jhonen Vasquez and Shinji Kasai of anime
Getting a personalized voice over performance from Steve Blum
Contributing reviews to an episode of Bang Zoom! Entertainment's AnimeTV
Getting Anime on YouTube unofficially
Running a YouTube Animation Channel

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Running a Streaming Animation Service online (Toon Realm, Sam and Max)
Entering and Competing in Animation Magazine's 11th Annual Pitch Party Contest 2012

In life, in my life, there are no shortcuts to money or anything else valuable. Only after years of honest,
strenuous hard work will you Ever be able to reap what you sew. If your ME. This fact that hard work and
only hard work over long periods of difficult time will ever bring financial gain, applies to me and no one
else. Others help themselves to getting rich off of dishonesty, cheating, manipulation, and general
shortcuts and substitutes to a hard and honest day's work. Playing fair is the ONLY way I've ever gotten
ahead.
It's an honest day's work for an honest day's pay. Simple as that. It's not just a bad idea to cheat and cut
corners and take shortcuts to make money when you're me. It's physically impossible to make money that
way: The Con Artist Way.

Sunday, May 20th, 2012,

Marriage. Yikes. You won't see me ever getting married. I don't care how rich I am, while sex...maybe.
Definitely not going to marry anyone. Why do people think money automatically = marriage. I hate
marriage. I don't believe in marriage, to anyone. I may as well be dead.
I'm a Deal-Maker. I Make Deals. Big Deals.
The Animag Pitch Party is one secret I have.
Jhonen isn't really as Japanese in nature as he probably thinks he is. He's not more Japanese than me.
Speaking of Japan, I'd like to get back to writing about Japan and Japanese culture and History, whether
it's Edo or WWII. I don't pass judgment on the Japanese. I'm here to embrace them and they're wonderful
language, art, literature, and culture. Along with all the rest. I became a little culturally jaded when I
sensed superficial interlopers involving Japan online. Like they were only talking about Japan so they
could be associated with me or something. That was weird. Not in love with myself that much that I need
ass kissers in America who worship my Japanese credibility. If they really want to pay their respects, they
can recommend some good cyberpunk anime titles to me other than Akira and Ghost in the Shell, which
I've kind of seen the highlights of a million times.
About three or four years ago, I was THIS CLOSE to watching a movie alone with my oldest female
friend, Amanda Martin.
Ring Ring
"Hello? Amanda. It's me, Joey"
"Joey? Hi Joey!"

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"Hi Amanda! So, uh, um, uh, I was kind of wondering, would you like to watch a movie on DVD at your
place."
"Ummm. Sure. Yeah, I think we could do that. I'd like to."
"OK then. Well, I'll talk to you later, okay Amanda."
"Yeah. Sure! Bye Joey!"
We then hung up our phones.
"Yes Yes Yes! Score! I scored a date with Amanda! At her apartment!" I thought. "I am the MAN!! A girl
wants to watch a movie with me!!!! Finally!!!"

Monday, May 21st, 2012,

So what elements does it take to really tell a story or narrative?
I'd say: Action, Description, Scenes, Dialogue, Characters
I spent a whopping 9 hours not watching any TV today. Well into the day and night. Well, I channel
surfed a tiny bit, but in reality, I didn't watch any real TV today for 9 straight hours! Yes yes! I timed
myself with a stopwatch.

Tuesday, May 22nd, 2012,

Honestly, I don't speak the language of most contemporary American animation. I speak the language of
anime, Chinamation, Franimation, comics, and American shows with anime influence. Comedy
animation and newer American cartoons with no real anime influence feels foolish and alien to me.

Thursday, May 24th, 2012,

There's one key difference between American and Japanese animators. American animators actually get
paid.
Working for free is bullshit. I don't really give out my time for free anymore. Why waste my energy and
time getting my original designs and ideas getting stolen and ripped off by people who work in animation
sweatshops somewhere in Asia making 2 pennies an hour in China, Korea, and Japan studios. Screw that!
I'll be damned if I'm going to get ripped by high school age Asian sweatshop laborers barely out of middle
school.
I'd rather be a jackass getting paid all the money in the world (Seth MacFarlane, Stephen Hillenberg,
South Park, Matt Groening) than work on the greatest anime IN THE WORLD and go bankrupt and get

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nothing, and not even be able to pay my bills and survive. In Japan, you WON'T SURVIVE. Oh well.
That's how the market works.
God. I'm swarmed by Japanese kids. They will not leave me alone. They're kind of stalking me, and I
don't think I like that feeling. It creeps me out. I need American artists, dammit! Someone who thinks in
terms of American resources, not Japanese ones, which are secondary. I'm tired of trying to fit in with
Japanese people. That doesn't do anyone any good. Go away.
Before Devil May Cry, there were really only two main pop culture animation and literary Demon-Slayer
genres in the storytelling medium. My concept for Mono: Demon-Slayer, with his Excalibur Dual Blade,
and HP Lovecraft, who is the inventor of the Demon-Slayer genre. I kind of borrowed many concepts
from HP Lovecraft's archetypes without knowing it. Him and Robert E. Howard and other Pulp Writers
like Isaac Asimov, JRR Tolkien, Philip K Dick, Arthur C. Clarke, and Michael Moorcock. Pulp Literature
had an enormous influence on me throughout my early literary adulthood career.
I tried an architectonic experimentation in my latest animation project with the Animag Pitch Party entry
spot that's going to be published. I decided to try something new. I had been working with organic
geometric and architectural structures, like the kind you see from Jhonen Vasquez and Marathon
Animation, two of my favorites. I decided to keep the organic architecture, and go with a more stark form
of shading to really bring out the highlights and positive and negative space, something very Batman,
very Art Deco Gotham City that was used to design the city of the first serious Batman series. The design
element, particularly of the BG is strong and original in my opinion. In a way, it's Integrative.
Judges and Editors:
For Animag:

Ramin Zahed (Editor in Chief)

Sheri Shelton

Judges:

Linda Simenski
Michael J Vogel
Donna Ebbs
Barry Blumberg (Smosh)
Sebastian Debertin (Ki.KA, Germany)
Katie Krentz (Comedy Animation, Cartoon Network)

Cartoon Network sure does love Southern Pride. That seems to be a recurring theme with their network:
Southern hospitality. They reference Florida, Texas, Georgia, and other Southern States a lot, and some
general east coast states like New York and New Jersey. I'd love to be part of that. Turner is big on the
South. He definitely loves living like a king in the South.

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Voice Actors: Casting
Cast Voices that Sound like these
Mark Hamill (Batman, Avatar) might make a good Nosferatu. As would Tim Curry (Scooby-Doo,
Regular Show) or Jeremy Irons (Eragon).
Wendee Lee (Cowboy Bebop, Megas, Bleach) would make a good Jen-Jen. So would Grey Delisles
(Billy and Mandy) or Tara Strong (Teen Titans), Michelle Ruff (Bleach, Rave Master), Chiara Zanni
(Oban), or Kari Wahlgren (Blood+).
Jinn? I don't have a voice for Jinn yet. Maybe Kirby Morrow (Inuyasha, Ninjago) or Scott Menville (Teen
Titans).
Charlie Adler (Cow and Chicken), Tom Kenny (Spongebob), or Jim Cummings (Catdog) could
potentially make a brilliant Krin.
Mono definitely looks to be Steve Blum territory, considering Steve Blum already did one previous read
through with me.
Oliver-E, I see Richard Horvitz (Zim, Angry Beavers, Billy and Mandy), Scott Menville (Mission Hill,
Shaggy Scooby-Doo, Teen Titans), or Christie Kavana (Dexter) Elijah Wood (Tron: Uprising).
HUI would have to have a deep or versatile robotic voice: Pee Wee Herman (Flight of the Navigator),
Peter Cullen (Transformers, IGPX, Toonami, Eeyor), The Adult Swim Big O II Commercial Announcer,
or Michael Clark Duncan (Minoriteam, Family Guy).
These are all subject to change, assuming what these people's opinions and schedules will allow. These
are the models.

Animation Studio:
Potential: Film Roman, JM Animation, Sony Animation, Williams Street, Titmouse, DC/Warner, Hasbro,
Turner Studios / Cartoon Network Studios, Dentsu, Marathon Media, Gonzo, Madhouse, Funimation
Director(?)
Uncertain: JM Directors, Titmouse Directors, Cartoon Network/DC/Warner Directors, Sony Directors A
combination of the above mentioned studio directors. Chosen by whatever producers I get paired with.
Chris Prynoski (Producer, Director, and/or Consultant) Kevin Kline (Producer, Director, Writer). But
would their managerial styles mesh? Corey Jackson (Art Director, Production Designer, Prop Designer)
My Role:
Main Character Design, Concept Artist, Writer, Creative Consultant, Art Director, Light & Shadow.
Creator/Producer (maybe a producer, maybe not), Licensor

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Reference Material for my cast and crew:
Batman: Animated, Story by Robert McKee, Oban Star-Racers, Katsuhiro Otomo's Akira, Wuxia,
Tolkien Middle Earth, Blade Runner, Cowboy Bebop, The Boondocks, Yu Yu Hakusho, Star Wars,
Conan, Sin City. An army of Otomos. Any artistic style, any DVD, any book, any comics that fits the
project and that my staff can afford to by and run by me to approve.

Friday, May 25th, 2012,

Honesty is not a valued trait in the mainstream media.
Actually stepping in and "telling" people to "vote for me" in a contest, would probably bring me worse
luck than if I didn't even mention it, and instead let whoever it were discover that thing on their own.
Though I'm sure I'll get my share of media attention and articles inevitably written about my decision I
make either way. Considering it's one my biggest things yet. YouTube was big, but very few people
thought that was about me directly. Same with the Adult Swim forums. It was ALWAYS about someone
else. If it is about me, I may as well just leave it alone. People are too competitive to take my media
centerpiece "lying down". LET IT be about someone else. I don't need to be the star of trade magazines. If
I were supervising anything in print, it would probably backfire somehow. I have a history, a tangible
track record of the media spotlight backfiring on me. I ain't sayin' NOTHING.
I'm definitely not humble online. I must have been brainwashed by the hype machine, where everyone is
encouraged to boast and brag and be all full of themselves. I kind of hate that aspect. I don't know if I
want to be arrogant if I reach the very top. Katsuhiro Otomo has the World at his Fingertips. But as far as
I can tell he's never bragged, especially not in the spotlight. I should follow his example, not the other
kind. People like Otomo teach a valuable lesson in Humility, in the fact that I don't need to brag, just
because I might end up having a lot in my life to brag about. Let other people's envy and skepticism of
my success be a reminder of all the reasons NOT to boast and brag. Being in Animag feels like I get to do
what I do for my website publication online, except now I see it in Animag too. Pretty cool. Ultimately,
I'm the creator of the Animag entry I sent, but I'm still deciding that if and when the opportunity comes, if
I really want to be a showrunner, or just a consultant, but also creator. It gets a bit complex and strategic,
this "producing animation" thing.
Technically, if you created one of Cartoon Networks 90s shows, back in the day, pretty much any of their
Cartoon Cartoons, you were probably making $50,000 for the entire sale. Tops. And yet I hear some
people think sums of money 3 times that much is "cheap". Cable TV has never paid people THAT
MUCH. It's the Foxes and CWs that really pay top dollar, not cable. I have been AWARE OF this fact
since at least 2000, 2001 or so, ever since my animation mentor Phil, told me about it after he learned
about it when he WORKED AT CN/Hannah-Barbera studios in the mid-90s. I just never wrote it on a
computer till now, cuz I know we got some people who focus way too much on the money aspect of
animation online nowadays.

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Saturday, May 26th, 2012

6,000 pages of cartoon fighting? That's what I should be doing?

Wait a minute. Yeah! YEAH! Hell fuckin' YEAH!!!!

6,000 PAGES OF CARTOON FIGHTING!!!!

THAT IS MY DESTINY!!!
The Longest Cartoon Fight Sequence EVER!!!!
Like Scud, but with Martial Arts!!! That would be Amazing!!
I can be the Shaw Brothers of Indie Comics

I CAN BE THE SHAW BROTHERS OF INDIE COMICS!!!!!!!

THAT'S IT!!!! That's the direction I need to go!!! Put my Chinese heritage on the page!!!!
Okay. Maybe not 6,000 pages of fighting (don't know if anyone's done that much) but a lot. I want to do
at least 100-600 fighting poses and comics pages by the end of 2012 to 2015.

Sunday, May 27th, 2012,

How to Draw Comics The Strebler Way!
Required Reading:

How to Draw Comics The Marvel Way

Batman: Animated
AKIRA and AKIRA CLUB by Katsuhiro Otomo
Pulp Fiction: A Quentin Tarantino Screenplay
Fight Choreography: The Art of Non-Verbal Dialogue by John Kreng
Start Your Own Business: The Only Startup Book You'll Ever Need by Entrepreneur Magazine
How to Write for Animation by Jeffrey Scott
Story by Robert McKee
Drawing on the Right Side of the Brain by Betty Edwards
The Natural Way to Draw by Shamus Culhaine
How to Write Science Fiction and Fantasy by Orson Scott Card

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Producing Animation by Catherine Winder and Zahra Dowlatabadi

I have some DVR footage of the New Toonami 2012 Bumps. But I want to see if anyone else uploads it
first. Surely someone was DVR recording Toonami last night other than me.

There are people who do THAT, they do THAT very well.

And the audience likes THAT, and finds meaning in the part at the Beginning, End, or Middle THAT.
So why not Make the Whole Damn Book THAT

Organic Cityscapes
Organic Patterns
Organic Architecture
Organic Art Deco
Elaborate Costumes
Ribbon Stripes
Wuxia Martial Arts Leg, Arm, & Camera Fight Scenes
Sword Fights
Sword and City Battles
Sword in Sky Battles
Shootouts
Existential Dialogue
Aspect Shot
Aspect Angle
Foreshortening and Over-The-Shoulder Shots (for dialogue)

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I'm able to crank out comic book pages in less than an hour per page. Well, I did with this page....
"PUNCHES"

This was easy to do. From this point on, with Manga Studio, which I bought today, I'm actually able to
crank out comics pages like a manufacturing assembly line. No energy or vitality required. They'll get
more elaborate in structure with the more fighting pages I do.
Fighting pages mine are modeled after:

Blade of the Immortal

Naruto
Dragonball Z
Teen Titans (animation)
Marathon Animation
Jeff Smith's Bone
Scud: The Disposable Assassin

Simple, yet aggressive and violent, with cool costumes and clean artwork.
End Game? Be the Shaw Brothers of indie action comics. With the looks of my newest page I did
today, it looks like I'm well on my way.

Monday, May 28th, 2012,

Got 3 all new comics pages done. And they were easy to make, just like the last page. It's simple.

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Method and Technique: I open the Manga Studio page, draw the panel boxes with the panel box sizing
button and feature, then click Import / Import Art, and resize each page to fit inside each panel, vertically
and/or horizontally. Easy as Pie.
Manga Studio is a Godsend. It makes designing sequential art a thousand times easier. Now I can focus
on just drawing really good pictures. Sizing the art up and fitting it to scale in the panels won't be a
problem, and when all that's approved, I can print the page out and move onto the next page.
Favorite quote of the week, discovered in Google Search results:
"JOE HAS A BOOK OUT. Art Manifested by J.M. Matthews. He's the only real Joe-author that there is"

I've pulled off another miracle. I've used the power of computers, digital layout, compositing, and comics
production software to increase my proficiency at making comics and comic book pages. As a matter of
fact, I've been so successful at ramping up production, that I can do the same amount of comics editing
work (5 good pages) that would normally have taken me 5 years, and produce the same amount of work
(5 pages) in 1 Day! That essentially means the productivity and speed of my comics production has
increased by 600%. That's Google level improvement. Eventually, if this model of production keeps up
I'll be able to retire from traditional page editing by hand, forego that process entirely, and compose all
my comic book pages digitally, much like the End Times Visions mini-comic.
My Comics Non-Fatigue Efficiency Power, because it is all computer based, like my writing, has got to
be at somewhere between 60%-100%! I'm incredibly powerful at making comics. Digital resources for
page layout are way more efficient and powerful than laying out a page with rulers, by hand. I'm going to
do some full page illustrations in the near future, scan them, composite them (props, Character, and
perspective), and compose their panels digitally where I will import the art to fit the panels. I resisted
using computers to draw comics with for a long time, but that was due to budgetary limitations. A little
random uninhibited spending and suddenly I'm shooting along at the speed of light.
I kind of wrote the book on the following:

Adapting Webcomics to TV Animation (Animag Pitch Party 2012)

Adapting Webcomics to TV Co-Production
Converting Webcomics to Indie and Graphic Novel Print Comics
Adapting from Comics to Animation

It all started with a webcomics account, some paper, pens, and a dream.
My goal is I want to do a High Quality Web-Comic Book and or graphic novel, then develop the preproduction bible for a TV Animated Series based around that same universe of characters and places, on
the same world, New-Earth.
But with ambitions this high, I'm bound to take some heat.

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Tuesday, May 29th, 2012,
I bought some mp3 albums off of Amazon yesterday.

Asian Kung-Fu Generation

Beastie Boys
Johnny Cash
Slayer
Larc-en-Ceil
Marilyn Manson
Slipknot
Coldcut
Sausage
Dethklok
My daddy left home when I was three
And he didn't leave much to ma and me
Just this old guitar and an empty bottle of booze.
Now, I don't blame him cause he run and hid But
the meanest thing that he ever did
Was before he left, he went and named me "Sue."
Well, he must o' thought that is quite a joke
And it got a lot of laughs from a' lots of folk,
It seems I had to fight my whole life through.
Some gal would giggle and I'd get red
And some guy'd laugh and I'd bust his head,
I tell ya, life ain't easy for a boy named "Sue."
Well, I grew up quick and I grew up mean,
My fist got hard and my wits got keen,
I'd roam from town to town to hide my shame.
But I made a vow to the moon and stars
That I'd search the honky-tonks and bars
And kill that man who gave me that awful name.
Well, it was Gatlinburg in mid-July
And I just hit town and my throat was dry,
I thought I'd stop and have myself a brew.
At an old saloon on a street of mud,
There at a table, dealing stud,
Sat the dirty, mangy dog that named me "Sue."
Well, I knew that snake was my own sweet dad
From a worn-out picture that my mother'd had,
And I knew that scar on his cheek and his evil eye.
He was big and bent and gray and old,
And I looked at him and my blood ran cold
And I said: "My name is 'Sue!' How do you do!
Now your gonna die!!"
Well, I hit him hard right between the eyes
And he went down, but to my surprise,
He come up with a knife and cut off a piece of my ear.
But I busted a chair right across his teeth
And we crashed through the wall and into the street
Kicking and a' gouging in the mud and the blood and the beer.
I tell ya, I've fought tougher men
But I really can't remember when,
He kicked like a mule and he bit like a crocodile.

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I heard him laugh and then I heard him cuss,
He went for his gun and I pulled mine first,
He stood there lookin' at me and I saw him smile.
And he said: "Son, this world is rough
And if a man's gonna make it, he's gotta be tough
And I knew I wouldn't be there to help ya along.
So I give ya that name and I said goodbye
I knew you'd have to get tough or die
And it's the name that helped to make you strong."
He said: "Now you just fought one hell of a fight
And I know you hate me, and you got the right
To kill me now, and I wouldn't blame you if you do.
But ya ought to thank me, before I die,
For the gravel in ya guts and the spit in ya eye
Cause I'm the son-of-a-bitch that named you "Sue.'"
I got all choked up and I threw down my gun
And I called him my pa, and he called me his son,
And I came away with a different point of view.
And I think about him, now and then,
Every time I try and every time I win,
And if I ever have a son, I think I'm gonna name him
Bill or George! Anything but Sue! I still hate that name!

-"A Boy Named Sue"

Johnny Cash

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Chapter 3

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Tuesday, May 29th, 2012,
Now I know a lot of people will probably give me respect posthumously if they ever figure
out what I was up to during my lifetime. But I must achieve fame and respect in my own
lifetime. I want respect too badly to not get it while I'm alive. How to do that is another
matter. Because the media doesn't always respect people. And sometimes, the more
someone wants respect, the less and less respect the media will actually give them, much
like me. I don't get respect most of the time.

THE DOOM BOOKS

Arise From The Depths of the Ocean, Great Kraken
And with a staff in one hand, Gandalf faced the ocean standing on the shore in sandals,
and raised his hands to the ocean, calling upon the serpent spirits lying deep in the
oceanic blackness, deep beneath the red and orange setting sun and tides. And The Beast
Awakened, and manifested into the ocean depths, swimming to the surface, as it arose
within the crashing waves, as rain, thunder and smashed downward into the water. The
Beast Rose. It wanted to kill and demolish the land dwellers who had dumped oil into its
once pure ocean abyss. Gandalf the Black had arisen as the Master of Black Magic and
Evil.
The Monster Had Awakened, and was now headed for land, resting in the midst of the
night beneath thunderstorms that also crowded the Black Seas.

The Evil Twin

The Evil Twin only appeared on the local 11 o'clock news when no one had called on him,
and when he knew it was a good time to wreak havoc and pandemonium, and kill and
rape the innocent. He always had a smile or glassy eyes whenever they kept snapping his
mugshot. The Evil Twin was spawned from a different master than Jay. Satan was the
Evil Twin's Father and Master. Because he was born damned from the start, his only real
goal was violence and suffering. That was the only thing he wanted to be famous for, was
causing suffering. After all, it's not like Satan gave him his Own Face. He despised the
face he had as much as he despised Jay and wanted to see Jay imprisoned, beaten, and
killed. And if he could do it by convincing the American Nation of Jay's guilt at his hands.
The Hell Minion Evil Twin. was going to make Jay pay the price for not being
slaughtered in the face like He, The Beast's Psyche Manifested, had.

Unleash the Plane Missiles

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Bush sat in his oval office chair.
"Unleash the Iraqi Plane Missiles. This Day in September, is too good, too just, too nice"
"Yes Sir!" The Colonel Barked "I'll get right on it."

11 O'Clock Undead Army News

You're watching the local 11 o'clock news, when someone breaks into the news studio, shoots the
news anchor in the head, he resurrects himself as a zombie, and continues reading the news. Shut
up! You yell at him. "Fuck you, news anchor guy. You're dead now". "NO. I'm NOT" he says, as
he stands up and leaves his anchor chair, a zombie corpse, as he walks up to the other side of your
TV screen, and lurches up to you, and begins to strangle the War Veteran watching, and
strangling him to death. Until he gets decapitated by the War Veteran's adopted son, and shot in
the head, as his brain matters sprays the living room and splatters the TV. They'll be more to
come, hisses the zombie news corpse. Not if I have anything to say about it, says the War
Veteran.

Satan School
(No Dropping Out! You need to get bullied by Satan's Children! It's good for you!)
An institute of learning, but founded by Satan in Hell. Your guns only shoot flames here. You're
unable to kill anyone in a school from hell. We're all damned here.

The Murder Prophecies

Book of prophecies written by a serial murderer.

Okay, I've had my fill of writing the dark and macabre for the day. That was pretty good actually.
Nice and Heavy. Very HP Lovecraft. Sure beats ranting. Just let the camera linger on rot and
decay.
I sure do write about weapons, death, violence, and destruction a lot. Damn. That's metal. I
should make a list of the key words and phrases I use.
It's weird how people abuse me all the time, yet I never really write about violent natured abuse
much, if at all, unless it's a villain of some sort. I don't enjoy writing about users and abusers. So I
don't.
My work is imaginative, yet intense and masculine. I take masculine literature: Horror,
superheroes, military and add a vivid vision of chivalry, the supernatural, and the otherworldly to
it. Violent, militant uses for a playful artist that refuses to grow up. That's my kind of literature.
Something that, in terms of both content and form, has never been seen or read before. I channel

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all of my interests and obsession and integrate them into one thing. I'm bringing things together
that haven't been brought together before. The Dark, The Playful, The Literate, the Creative
and Visionary, and the Masculine.
Thursday, May 31st, 2012,
People can't possibly become that obsessed with me if my status and salary rise, can they? For
now, people seem to think I'm a cartoon character. Or the President. I can live with that. But one
day in the near future, they might actually starting wanting to know more about me for the sake of
knowing more about me. How personal should I be to people like that (the ones who "want to
know the real me, and not the fake me")? Everyone seem to know the surface me. Very few if any
know the real, day to day me deep down, the one I see every day.
I've taken a cool-headed, low key aspect to my professional work so far lately. Seems to have
worked for me so far. But the thing is low key is really all I know how to be. I don't think I'd
make a very good drama king. There's another reason for my low-key demeanor. Excitable, overexcitable, gleeful, and giddy doesn't really work for me. It makes people around me lose their
cool, and dislike me, so no more of that.
Friday, June 1st, 2012,
The deadline for Pitch Party...has arrived. 3, 2, 1, Let's Jam. After today's over, now's the part
where things start getting interesting. I don't know what the other entry designs look like. I'm sure
they'll be pretty good though, at the very least. It is Animag after all. That magazine is read by
more comics and animation power players than any other trade magazine of animation in
existence, so in that sense, I'm really excited about participating in the contest. I don't have
experience, but I've got Some abilities for storytelling and design. True, I lack experience, and
don't really have experience in comics or animation working for anyone in animation or TV,
outside of a few credits in Bang Zoom!'s AnimeTV series as a Reviewer, but that's never stopped
me from giving my all in the past. I am an author with a self-published art book on Amazon, and
a press bio. I've got as good of a chance of succeeding as anyone else. I'm neither too young nor
too old to find work, hypothetically speaking.
Well, considering if anyone can manage the monumentally near impossible and difficult task of
finding a way to contact Indigo directly by phone or email, and if I get a gig, he/she's as good as
hired. Anyone who's that much on the cutting edge, actually cutting off the edge, you WANT on
your design team.
Should I stop accepting social security health care paycheck from the government for "mental
illness" claims on behalf of my doctors/therapists in favor of finding actual work? Well, if I ever
did find a job, (which I probably won't ever), the government would stop writing me checks. And
I'd have to rely on J.O.B. money instead, but because no one seems to be able to hire me, we all
know that's not happenin anytim soon. So I guess its government money for the time being.

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Saturday, June 2nd, 2012,

I might be approaching a time in my career of much privilege. A time where, if I network, work
hard, and behave myself, I might start seeing the opportunity to get phone meetings with
executives of Networks and Licensing Conglomerates. And if I impress the executives with my
presentation, and if the phone and email and/or videoconference pitch meeting goes well, I might
just be lucky enough to find myself with a job. And I'd probably be able to work that to my
advantage. Because that's one way to get your foot in the door, as the saying goes. My foot is
THIS CLOSE to being in the door. I'm VERY fortunate lately. I'm closer to real success than a lot
of people. I've just got to watch myself.
And if foot does end up in the door, and I transcend that position and develop a comfortable
animation niche for myself, if this animation thing really is written in the stars, if I do one major
animation TV project I might be in charge of, it could lead to subsequent follow-up work, more
contacts in the industry like Steve and Indigo, I can work myself into an office at a studio, or at a
home office in a niche vocation that gets more and more comfortable and requires less and less
work on my part to make money. It's the American Dream. The American dream is to be hired by
Michael J. Vogel or Kim Manning, or to have them acquire one of your projects.

Sunday, June 3rd, 2012,

I've really got to stop drawing pictures based on an idealized vision of my abilities, which is
really nothing more than merely an idealized interpretation of the ingenious artists I admire,
whose level I won't ever match, so I may as well focus on where I really am, not where Katsuhiro
Otomo or Dave Sim were in 1989. That's just unrealistic. I need to base my new work on the
drawings I can do. NOT on what some genius can do in his prime. If I work based on regular,
normal, realistic expectations of my work (i.e. what I can actually do, not what I WANT to do)
and not perfectionist or idealized expectations, I think I can go really far.
Every artist has a natural style they're most comfortable with.
Actually, I may not have money from my artwork, or appreciation or respect, but I do have style.
Tons of style actually. I've got a very powerful multi-style. I've got style to spare. But style
doesn't always pay the bills. Mine certainly don't.
The biggest influence on me now, is me. Filling my own shows is the biggest task there is.
Revisions: How to draw the same drawing many times over.

Check Proportions. Get Proportions Right

Re-Capture the First Drawing's Initial Inspiration and Spirit

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Think Like an Animator

How to Draw Better:

Stick With What I'm Good At: My Natural Style

Measure and Check Proportions for Accuracy
Never Stop Mastering Anatomy and Perspective
Work on Line Weight

In terms of audience size, my writing, my art, and myself, I'm one of the least popular celebrities
there are, Twitter and YouTube audience size numbers aren't going to lie to you. But I noticed I'm
very prolific with art, fiction writing, screenwriting, and especially journaling, tweeting, and
blogging. I bust my ass to make sure people have something to read or watch online for the most
part, be it on Twitter, Blogger, ASMB, or YouTube. I'm the target of many character attacks and
insults. That's never really phased me all that much though. Just every so often when I get
depressed about my failure to make a profit from anything. Other than that I'm quite prolific.
There never stops being someone who's more popular and has higher numbers. But I'm not really
concerned with what other people do online who aren't me. I don't ask for money or respect
because I am egoless, selfless, and unselfish. I pride myself on these traits. Let someone else get
the glory. I don't need it, at all really. Too much criticism and pressure being a real icon.
Humility is sacred, and I've got plenty of that. I'm perfectly happy exactly where I am.
National:
My life
My home
My family
My friends
My workspace
My publications
My Money

International
My heritage
My racial identity
My creativity
My recognition and fame
My influence
My Internet Audience

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I'm saving up to go on an out of state vacation. I'm going to be saving some money up. I'm
headed anywhere but Florida. I'm getting the fuck out of dodge. Looking forward to that.
I've been going through a transitional period, an identity crisis where I see my likeness and
identity get stolen by media-thieves and identity thieves I don't even know who I am anymore. I
have no visual identity to associate with. My regular look doesn't even feel like it's my own
property anymore, people repeatedly make repeated attempts to steal my look, hence destroying
its value and appeal to me. My face, hair, name and likeness of my adolescent look and traditional
look has no value nor any appeal to me anymore. It's all so disgustingly shallow that so many
people don't have real identities of their own so they think they'll easily get away with stealing
mine because obviously no one's gonna call them on that one, other than the guy they stole their
fake ass look from who no one seems to listen to. It's all about letting go of who I was with me.
That person no longer is me. Watching TV feels like being in jail. And I know, I've been to jail.
Psyche ward, Jail. Same thing.
There's no such thing as making yourself happy by being a shopaholic. Shopping is fun and
enjoyable, and it can add stuff to your pop culture collection, but it's no solution for clinical
depression. You can't buy your way to happiness. Being rich won't make you happy. I don't care
about being rich to buy things. I care about survival. Retirement, travel, having a place to live,
work supplies, and living expenses. All that together is less than $100,000. I've been wondering if
there really actually is a place for me in this world, a place that loves me and doesn't hate me, and
a place where I'm accepted and not rejected. The closest I came to that was Phil and the Art
Institute. Everywhere else I've felt excluded on some level.
My home situation. This too shall pass.
Sigh. Martial Arts. I don't know about making a career out of fighting and violence. It's still
violence, and fighting is exhausting, and fatiguing, and it takes up so much power and energy. If
you make a career out of fighting comics, I don't know if, as an American artist, you'll ever really
recover. As a non-Asian artist it's really fucking hard to draw nothing but fighting. No small task.
But enough whining.
In filmmaking, TV, and literature like fiction and comics, there's no such thing as "too over-thetop". It's impossible to be excessive and over the top in comics and literature.
As long as Big Brother's somewhere else, sabotaging someone else, somewhere else far away,
screwing up someone else's career plans far away, I have nothing to worry about. As long as he's
sabotaging himself somewhere else, with someone else very far, far away, he definitely can't and
won't sabotage me. He sabotages anyone he lives with. I'm just glad he's not anywhere near me.
God answered my prayers. Andrew The Domestic Dictator is Gone! At least for a good long
while, if not completely for good. Talk about good timing. He'll definitely fail at whatever he sets
his mind to. He always does. That's nothing new. But as long as he's not doing it anywhere near
me, I couldn't care less, at all really. Let him fail at conversations with family and phone tag
somewhere other than in my house for a change. Let him argue with and scream at someone else

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with his tics when they're talking on the phone. You want him, JG Quintel and Seth MacFarlane,
you got him. Just as long as he's out of my life, I'm happy. And he will be out of my life for at
least a while.

Both art and writing have two separate modes and levels
Art:
Real Mode: Comics, Storyboards, Character Designs, Conceptual Art, Production Design, Styles
Non-Focused Mode: Sketchbooks, Sloppy Comics
Literature:
Real Mode: Fiction, Essays, Novels, Short Stories, Animation Scripts. Description, Action,
Dialogue
Non-Focused Mode: Journals of All Varieties, Random Lyrics, Rants, Commentary, and Prose

Here's the proportion percentage of form@ vs. warm-up

Art:
Form@: 30%
Warm-Up Work: 70%
Literature:
Form@: 40%
Warm-Up Work: 60%

Multi-Talent Job Titles:

Novelist
Comic Book Creator
Screenwriter
Storyboard Artist
Production Designer
Character Designer
Conceptual Artist

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I would like to move across the country and retire. Am I old enough for retirement?
Though it isn't proven or overt, CN and Adult Swim do put a lot of pressure on most of its staff to
veer away from mature, non-vulgar action cartoons, and workers are strongly encouraged to
either produce or speak highly of non-action, non-anime adult animated programming. There is a
pressure to not give in to the internet there, maybe because of how much trash anime fans talk
and how negative they are online. I don't know. Just a hunch. Maybe if otaku were older and or
less female and or nicer, CN/AS might actually not typecast and segregate anime from primetime
so much.

God's Will of Man's Destiny

My Abilities, My Power, Strength, and Skill, and Genius for Art and Literature and Filmmaking,
comes directly from God Himself. God is the reason I Express Myself on Computers and Paper.
Whatever little bit of genius I have, comes from the Almighty God Above, Way Up in the
Cosmos and Sky. Satan wants me to quit or Kill Myself, like Bryan said I should do. His murder
he commited put him out of God's Good Graces for All Future History. Now he's damned to
spend an Eternity in Hell. I'm not though. God wants me to Create, and he wants me to Smite
Any and All Critics, who are driven by the Devil Himself. My Strength and Strength of Will
come from God. There's no other possible explanation for the Power and Force of my Mind,
Body, Spirit, Mystical and Mysterious Genius and Will...other than God himself Handed Me the
Keys to the Kingdom. I REJECT EVIL, and MALICE. I REJECT MURDER AND DEATH. And
HELL and SATAN, and the Devil. I reject the Mastermind(s) Who Conspire Against Me. My
Work, and the More I Do It, Puts me in Touch with God. God also told me to look out for slick
marketing packaging Posers and Imposters with Faces Like Mine. They are Wolf Cloaked in
Sheep Skin. How can you call yourself GOOD if you're NOT driven by God. Or if you're Driven
by Hatred and Fear.
Tuesday, June 5th, 2012,
Sometimes just reading books on "how to" do something is used as an excuse and substitute for
actually doing something, which means it's nothing more than resistance in disguise. No amount
of "How-To" tutorial reading will ever be a substitute for "just doing it", taking action, making
mistakes and failures, and just diving right in. Don't read anything on drawing a comic book page
before you draw your comics. Just draw the comics then sort it out afterward.
Most of the time, when it comes to writing fiction and drawing comics and screenwriting, you
have to put a little bit of force and concentration into it. You have to physically force yourself to
sit down and physically force your fingers to start typing or drawing things with a pencil.
Drawing and writing polished work is a willful, very intentional, very focused, very conscious
thing. If you don't put real physical effort and work into overcoming inertia, you'll never get

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started working. You have to force yourself. You can always opt out to quit, not start, and remain
comfortable. You have to take the comfort away.
It's not comfortable to force myself to get back to work, but it is effective.
God is the most powerful person I know. I find much inspiration in Him. When I'm blocked I
seek him for council. God is my muse. Because God is limitless. The Lord is limitless. There's no
limit to the amount of strength, power, and energy God and meditation will give you, assuming
you ask for the gift of such things to begin with.
Yeah, I do kind of hate Big Brother. He's an evil sociopath with numerous criminal tendencies.

My fiction prose and screenwriting is turning out to be really, really productive, even when the
majority of my writing was journals. I'm in the midst of pulling the old switcheroo on this fact.
My plot and story writing is catching up to my non-fiction. Matter of fact, by now after a page
count, I have around 150 pages of fictional plots and stories, and some descriptions and dialogue.
I have more than 150 pages of fictionally based writing.
Well, technically I did ask for a manuscript. And I got one! And it's well over 100+ pages. My
efforts are starting to become more tangible. A manuscript that's fat and thick like mine is
something very real. Something I can thumb and flip through on a whim. Though it isn't all
connected in terms of content, it is connected in its form. There's more than enough short form
material there to pick out and continue to work on until it becomes long for material. By the time
I have a cohesive, coherent fully formed plot and story, that General Manuscript will be massive.
Almost as massive as my Journals.
The First Draft of the Fictional Manuscript is Finished, in July of 2012.
Mission Accomplished.
The End

Wednesday, June 6th, 2012,

Jobs I'm doing that don't have a "Most Influential" or "Top 10 Greatest" List....yet.

Action Screenwriter
Science-Fantasy Author
Production Designer
Animation Writer

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Online Broadcaster

So, I've mastered the whole "novelist" & "screenwriter" thing.

And I'm on my way to mastering the "comics" & "Photoshop" thing, which I got today, cuz I
pirated it.
Painting, production design, storyboard, and character design are optional.
Going to be learning some Photoshop, particularly anime style cell shading for my initial
drawings.

Meanwhile there's my adoptive parents and big brother's odd, eccentric, and demented daily
behavior. You can tell my mom and dad of the adoptive variety are getting old. They seem to be
showing signs of alcoholism, paranoia, and dementia. Meanwhile my stepbrother secretly wants
to ruin my work and social life by acting like a callous sociopathological lying greedy dick. He
doesn't deserve any of the money he has access to, and constantly brags about his money, which
he steals from his adoptive dad.

Thursday, June 7th, 2012,

Turns out I might have not just written a journal. I might very well have written the longest
journal series in the history of the world! I'm currently in contact with Guinness World Records.
I'll probably be filling out an application to verify this potential fact with evidence, which
wouldn't be a very difficult thing to do. I'm going to be submitting digital word processor files of
my work to Guinness World Records. I've literally written the world's longest journal, a series of
digital computer word processor files, manuscripts, and self-published books, which accumulate
to more than 3,500+ pages. No one's written more than that. I'm one of the world's most prolific
writers and diarists.

Friday, June 8th, 2012,

If by some unfortunate misfortune, my parents die, and I can't afford upkeep on the house
because I can't find a job, I do have some options. I know 2 other people than anyone in my
adoptive family who could potentially take me in and house me temporarily, in an so-called "End
of the World" contingency plan scenario. Chris up north, and my birth Mom. Also up north. But
that's really only something I'd consider way into the future if I have no money and need a place

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to live, maybe I could live with one of them. They seem polite enough. It wouldn't be like living
with the Andrew Family. That'd be awful.
Seth MacFarlane knows I don't do drugs and never have, though he can't exactly claim the same
thing. He's well aware of this, though he does like perpetuating his own personal "mythology"
that claims the opposite, with "Roger" or whoever the fuck the "Fat FBI Alien" is supposed to be.

Saturday, June 9th, 2012,

Yeah, I'm going to choose sage-like forgiveness over bitter hatred. I usually do. If there's one
thing I inherited from my Father, it's the ability to handle spiritual challenges and crises.
When I'm not a cartoonist, I'm a software developer and engineer.
The financial and socioeconomic gap of power and money between anime kids and Tech Titans is
so vast it's depressing. Those anime kids have nothing to look forward to. No money, no power,
no status, no fame, and yet they still willing work for peanuts by doing "free art work" online, all
slaughtering one another in a selfish, hypercompetitive, and counterproductive attempt at selfaggrandizement, trying to stab as many people in the back just to one up others, abuse the power
they hope to achieve, and brag about their accomplishments online in a selfish attempt to stab
their peers in the back, viciously and in as mean of a tone as possible to get ahead. Meanwhile the
Tech industry, whether it's Steve Jobs or the internet, is the complete opposite. They make all the
money in the world, with none of that disgusting nastiness and cruelty the anime kids display so
openly. That's because in reality mean kids don't get ahead. Bullies don't get ahead in life. They're
at the bottom of a sky-high social pyramid, of which I'm somewhere at the midway point. It's
unfortunate. Seeing such bitterness and disloyalty from people who have nothing to look forward
to in their careers (all because of a poor disposition and lack of self-confidence in real life)
depresses me so much. I wish it wasn't this way. But it is.
My art gets a lot more power, admiration, respect, and attention from the mainstream and "elite"
media than my writing and tech engineering have ever had. They only pay attention when you
fail. They never notice or care when you succeed.
I finally found a name for the capital of New-Earth, North America. I now have a name for the
city Mono and company live in: Black City. It's my own version of Gotham meets Neo-Tokyo.

I don't need money or approval. I need trust. I need faith. I need Faith in both God and/or Myself.
I need to stop listening to attacks and criticism so much. Stop letting it get to me. There are ways
to tune it out and focus on the Task At Hand. I don't have as much self-confidence as I should.
And Fuck Anyone who tries to undermine, deny, insult, or generally Resist and Defy that, or Me.
John Lasseter has faith in me. Steve Blum has Faith in Me. Jhonen has Faith in Me. Even

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Katsuhiro Otomo and the French and Japanese and British have Faith and Trust in me for the
most part. It's very obvious. Truth is, my emotional self-confidence is not very high. I'm going to
have to teach myself how to rely in myself, and trust in myself, and be true to and have Faith in
Myself. God Bless.
It stems from my relationship with my family. My family obviously doesn't have any Trust or
Faith in Me. They go out of their way to "prove" and proclaim this. But fuck them. Because
people close to me don't have faith and trust in me, in my subconscious, it's sent a message, mafia
style, that says because we don't believe in you, you don't deserve to believe in yourself either.
Fuck that noise. I am good enough. I am powerful enough. I am strong enough, and brilliant and
smart enough, and clean enough, and sacred enough. I AM GOOD ENOUGH!!!!! FUCK YOU!!!
Qualities in Myself I Need to Develop:

Patience
Self-Confidence
Faith and Trust in God/Myslf
Focus on the Work
A Thick Skin
Intuition
Hygiene and Grooming
Tolerance for Criticism
Discipline
Willpower
Bravery
Positivity / A Positive Attitude

So. Mono, with his teammates, solves a slew of mysteries, and gets into a number of weapon wielding
altercations as an investigator and special agent for the paramilitary Shadow Operative Seven
Organization of Black-City. He's a Demon-Hunting anti-terrorist agent who solves mysteries. He always
keeps his swords and firearms with him, concealed by his gray-black coat, as protection for any attempts
on his life or efforts to assault or injure him and generally beat him up.
Well, I can't force Corey to work on Parallax if he doesn't want to work on it, which he probably doesn't.
Hell, there's no way of contacting him technically, so how the hell should I know to ask him about it
directly anyway. I USED TO be able to do that. He's pretty against pressuring other people to do things.
But fortunately, I learned a lot from studying his artwork. By studying his techniques, and copying from
them in the formative years, I picked up a few of his perspective and production design tricks, so
fortunately I've still got me to work with. Still an amazing artist, but I guess he's not as suited to my style
as I initially thought. Should have read the signs.

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Monday, June 11th, 2012,
All Right! The Pitch Party Event is now underway. They just opened up the main 32 entries to the public
on animationmagazine.net, and people can vote on their favorite. I told some of my friends and am telling
family members they can all vote for me as well if they want to. My entry actually ended up looking
really great in the big picture in my opinion.
In terms of the Contest, I'm very happy with my entry: Parallax: The Chronicles of Mono Jubei. My
concept illustration, my idea is now being promoted by Animation Magazine, online. Online Animation
Magazine has 100,000 readers in what is probably 100 countries. Well, I'm not at all embarrassed in any
way, I'll say that much, so it's turning out better than my mistakes on AnimeTV. My entry in the contest
has huge branding growth potential. It's one of the greatest ways of getting exposure in the animation
industry and community that I can think of.
Technically, a Parallax drawing of mine is getting featured on Animation Magazine's website
(animationmagazine.net) for their 11th Annual Pitch Party contest. My entry is 1 of 23, not 1 of 3 million,
which feels different to me.
Well, technically I am sort of in the limelight (spotlight), at least for now. It feels great, like I'm really
accomplishing something, like I'm actually making it finally on a noticeable level.
Steven Jay Blum (David Lucas) called my most recent accomplishment in animation "Huge"! I'm so
honored to receive praise from someone that powerful and important. Maybe my crazy "ugly and foolish"
dream WILL happen. I guess you never know. Steve Blum told me about how often he's seen people give
up in trying to realize their dreams, and seemed to indicate what I've achieved is no small feat. Straight
from the Toonami and Cowboy Bebop Anime King Himself! Is my foot in the door yet? LOL.

I have a new goal, for once I get my foot in the animation door, if it isn't already there:
I want to be a prolific creator, character designer, storyboard artist, writer, and art director. Work for any
and all big names, whether it's an animation celebrity, an anime studio, a French co-production studio, an
American Los Angeles or New York studio, or anyone really. Anyone who wants to work with me pretty
much. As long as their A) Ingenious and Talented and Productive, or B) Big and Prolific. I'd love to do
with animation what Katsuhiro Otomo does with anime. Or do with animation production what Moebius
used to do with Hollywood and comic books. I also plan on doing comics, maybe webcomics too if the
audience is there.
22 Says: "I'm BUILDING SOMETHING. DON'T DISTURB me."
"You Are Not Alone": Potential (And/Or Official) Animation Allies of JM (Potential Clients):

Cartoon Network Studios

LucasArts
Adult Swim
Williams Street

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Toonami
Adultswim.com
Funimation
Funimation.com
Manga Entertainment
Bang Zoom! Entertainment
Tokyopop
Amazon Inc.
Google
YouTube
Walt Disney Television Animation
DC
Marvel
Nickelodeon
MTV / MTV 2
Disney XD
The Hub
Hasbro
Gonzo
Miramax
Madhouse
New Line Cinema
Revolutionary Entertainment
Twentieth Century Fox
Dark Horse Comics
Image Comics
Top Shelf
Slave Labor Graphics
Dark Horse Manga
Oni Press
I'm not one to hold grudges his entire life. I'm willing to look past former differences. There can
be bad apples in any group. It doesn't mean EVERYONE in some groups are bad, just some
people. And also, it's much easier to have fewer enemies when you make a greater effort to be
everyone's friend. Just ask Pixar and Blum.
If people on the web want to have childish rivalries against other people for what is apparently an
ill-conceived and illegitimate reason, based on actions and words of people they've never met.
Truth is, one of my best teachers worked at Nickelodeon in the 90s, on their very first animated
series and THE FIRST animation co-production, period: DOUG on Nickelodeon. Why would I
hate everyone in a company that employed one of my greatest and most well liked art teacher. He
never had the kinds of problems I had. But when it comes to Phil Ferretti, I'd rather be a Phil

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Ferretti or John K than a Jhonen or Bryan. The former 2 know how to get along with people in
general. The latter 2. Well, let's not even GO there. Not anymore anyway. And besides, one of the
people judging my entry in the Pitch Party is a Nickelodeon executive. She worked at
Nickelodeon for 15 years starting her career there as an intern, including on Avatar. She's been
with both the old Nick and New Nick. As controversial as New Nick is, I find it reassuring that
there's people still working there from the 90s and earlier. Nickelodeon Studios is one of the
creator friendly (for the most part) studios I'd love to sell a family show like Oliver-E to. Them,
CN, Disney XD, Disney Television Animation, or The Hub. They all do action-adventure shows
that have certain elements in common with Oliver and his world.

The Seth MacFarlane sitcom universe, while complex at times in terms of story...make no bones
about it, is a sociopathic, and socially evil place. By a landslide. They really do go overboard on
making American Dad and Family Guy 2 of the most sociopathic and socially evil shows on TV.
There's no real purity in those shows whatsoever. Every character on both shows is an evil
cognizant and self-aware sociopath. A social disease.

Tuesday, June 12, 2012,

So I'm in luck. Since my main focus in animation is preproduction work, I might be able to get
some work in animation pre-production. Pre-production really just boils down to a bunch of
different variations on storytelling and design work. I want to eventually move to Los Angeles to
study animation pre-production.
On the plus side, if I signed a contract to work in Los Angeles, chances are the studio would pay
for air travel, transportation, and housing, and I'd make a salary. Places like my favorite networks
really do known how to treat a guy. Yes, when you consider everything is paid for just to get me
to work in Los Angeles, they certainly do take care of you. Most major animation studios have
relocation funding, and will pay for your move to Los Angeles for the most part if they really
want you.
Here's what it says in my book, Producing Animation:
Relocation Costs
If there is a shortage of talent where the project is to be produced, it may be
necessary to hire people from other locations. It is common to pay for airline
travel, temporary housing, transportation, and possibly a daily payment.
Additionally, the production will be responsible for obtaining visa and work
permits when necessary.

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I COULD stay in Florida and be a creative consultant from a home studio, or I could go through
with a studio funded relocation to Los Angeles to be closer to the heart of the production, maybe
even work on the production as one of the producers. I'll have to give that one some thought.
Parallax: From Page to Screen
The pre-production work I've done on my Animag contest entry for just happens to be something
I dropped off at Animag. I haven't really told any of the people involved in the contest about my
show's development history yet. I spent a staggering 8 YEARS generating pre-production creative
work (scripts, production design, storyboard, comics, character designs, conceptual artwork,
story, and lighting concept design) and obsessing about Parallax on a near daily basis, without
ever missing a day. I pour my heart and soul into Parallax and Mono and his friends. Now I'm
getting an opportunity to make all my years of spec development and hard work pay off. My
development process of my comic has been going on for so long, online and off, that I often
forget about the long history and tail my TV project has. I'm more devoted and tenacious (and
probably also stubbornly stupid) than most creators.
In my book, in my consciousness, in my universe: Telling stories, and presenting ideas to
companies and audiences, both directly and indirectly] is more than just a profession or a calling.
I work so hard at my presentation that it's NOT just a gig or financial and creatively fulfilling
opportunity: Above all, it's a way of life. My style of writing and drawing is a lifestyle, not just a
vocation. It's a borderline spiritual calling to put my vision on display.
"Let's see here. What kind of money can I play the slots with? Hmm. Let's see what we got here.
Dum dee dum dum. Quarter. Penny. Dime. Nah. What's this? Oh, century old magic dime! Yeah,
let's play this one!"
Wow, books that have or are so-called "media tie-ins" sure do sell pretty well. TV and movies
almost seems like some kind of holy grail to comic book and manga editors. Not too hard to do
the math. More people watch movies and TV than read novels and comics. But stuff on Amazon
like Sailor Moon and Avatar, purely because of how iconic the TV shows that inspired them are,
become instant bestsellers. Well, that's 1 way to sell a lot of books: Have a more famous, more
mainstream tie-in or association.
Nope. I'm not powerful AT ALL. I don't know why I wanted power at one point. I don't
understand the first thing about how to use real power. I'm better without it. Sort of. But then
again, who am I anyway. I'm a bad guy, so what do I know, right?
The truth about power is this: Most people aren't noble or responsible with it once they attain it.
Most people abuse what little power they have or attain, and take it all out on other things or
people. That's no way to apply strength.
I'm not comfortable with the idea of using money as a status symbol. I'll buy some DVDs, more
computer equipment, and that's that.

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I'm the incognito millionaire. I wouldn't want to advertise my wealth. Honestly, I just want to
work.
So much for finding work in comics or the web. It was fun while it lasted. But unfortunately I'm a
big believer in sticking to what I'm good at. Even if it's not everything.
"More Money, More Problems"
Money would probably cause me more problems than it would solve.
I'm getting a serious case of cabin fever. Being locked up in this house with no automotive
transportation, letting me rot away = surefire way to make me go crazy and stress me out. I'd love
to get out and do things. Just not here. This place harbors dark memories.
I seem to be imagining what if success situation and losing my focus. AGAIN. It's easy to lose
your focus when you're finally progressing forward.
"Not all who wander are lost."

The Giant Monster Who Hunted Me end up in the news for murder against someone who
trusted him. His name lives on in the infamy he thought he thought he was "above"
I ended up in the animation trades.
One won (that would be me) and One Lost Big Time. For choosing evil, the low road.
Everyone seems to have gotten what they deserved in the end of the story.
Yeah, I'd say that sounds about right.
And THAT, my friends, is why you should always do the right thing.
God will provide for you, in time.

Scorpio DON'Ts

Don't bask in your own Scorpio power. It makes people think you're evil or "something's
up".
Don't Brag and Boast, publicly or privately if you're a Scorpio. It makes you look
insecure, and makes people think you ARE "insecure", or "annoyingly cocky". Bragging
and Boasting will tarnish and destroy your formerly oh-so-powerful vibe, persona /
reputation. Most people will resent you for doing such things.
Don't be manipulative or try to manipulate everything, people can easily sense that and
get defensive about it.
Don't be TOO secretive. It can work against you. You have so much powerful energy at
your disposal it will overwhelm all who cross your path, in the worst possible way. They
WILL assume "something's up" and become suspicious of you.

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Never be, or at least try not to be overly brash or forceful with others. It will overwhelm
everyone. Sometimes it causes thunderstorms.

God. Home maintenance SUCKS.

Current Mood: Excited about potential success, and just a tad bit overwhelmed and intimidated
and overwhelmed by the intensity of the Giant Limelight Beam shining down, from the Cosmos,
on me.

If I work at screenwriting, the speed of my script production and output, maybe I could even get
some actual work as an animation screenwriter, even if it's "only" for my gig. I think I have the
potential to write scripts faster than I do. Only if I work at it though.
By now, it seems obvious to even the biggest most clueless morons and idiots on the planet that,
frankly, I've never been in love with my own face. But I've learned to stop being so adversarial
about it as well, which is a step forward. I particularly like it when This Face talks to itself about
the Novel Writing Process. Compelling stuff.

Wednesday, June 13th, 2012,

If I land some kind of job, no doubt about it. I'll be relocating. I'd rather take a chance, and
relocate, than waste my time in this mud rut. I make my own business and lifestyle decisions, and
if I say I'm relocating, then I'm relocating. Which I am or will be at some point. Could be sooner,
could be later. I can't see that far into the future.
While I don't have an Asian Anime or European Co-Production studio, but I do have an American
Animation Digital Studio, I can certain Run and Operate my Digital Studio like an Anime and
Co-Production studio. I can "play pretend". Not much pretending there though.
I'm sort of done with comics. At least for now. From now on, they're ALL storyboards in these
eyes.
Adult Oriented Action Cartoons on Cable Networks is kind of my specialty, what with shows like
Ben 10, Generator Rex, GI Joe: Resolute/Renegades, Oban Star-Racers, Spawn, The Maxx and
Star Wars: The Clone Wars. Many retailers already classify this kind of animation as anime, even
though technically it isn't Japanese.
This new decade, the second decade of 2000, IS MINE!!

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There most definitely is a deep connection between comics and animation, in 3 Continents, North
America, Asia, and Europe. Those are the only continents that matter in animation and comic
book media.
My Journal books offer a rare glimpse inside of the mind of a potential animation auteur in the
making. Once I've finished doing my thing, Everyone will want to see my notes that were so
obsessively devoted to selling, making, drawing, and developing Parallax.

Thursday, June 14th, 2012,

Roles I'm interested in having input in:

Script & Story

Production Design
Conceptual Design
Lighting & Shade
Character Design
Storyboard

On the plus side of the whole contest debacle, it's not all loss. The contest might not have turned
out as I'd hoped (not yet anyway), but it is pretty cool getting to be Steve Blum's friend and one
of his biggest fans, AT THE SAME TIME! He even made an effort to network in the industry for
me, but apparently they were too stupid to even know who the world's most famous anime voice
actor is. That's one of the most ironic stories that have happened to me yet.
Exciting Developments, 2012 Edition:

Kris Prynoski on Twitter

Motorcity
Tron: Uprising
PITCH PARTY CONTEST
Newfound Steve Blum Friendship
Toonami 2012 (The Return)
Google Lawsuit Money
Art: Manifested
Monsuno
Boondocks: Season 4
Kaijudo: Rise of the Duel Masters
Redakai

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Art Manifested on a co.jp website

Friday, June 15th, 2012,

Some people think you shouldn't sue God, when he rips you off. Screw that noise! Sue the Hell out of
God. Sue whoever makes you lose money.
Every time I sense a lot of potential money coming my way, I cut myself off from society and shift into
silent ultra-secretive mode.
Well, I've got nothing to do. Except Rule The World. Which I do. God, I love basking in my own power
and glory.
Things I'm going to teach myself about:

Producing Animation
Screenwriting
Japanese Thinking and Culture
Ken Wilber's first book
Speaking Japanese

I own numerous books on science, philosophy, mysticism, and spirituality. I like reading integrative
literature on science and spirituality, knowledge and religion. My philosophy does not pit one against the
other. For the last 11 years it never has. I'm a scientist, but I'm also a mystic. To me, religion and science,
while they're not the same thing, they're both built on the pursuit of knowledge, and they're both built on
systematic, intuitive, and introspective thinking. Religion and the Spirit are not meant to be intolerant or
ignorant, and Science isn't the Devil. Popular misconceptions. I believe Philosophy is the meeting place
between science and religion.
This journal and my web accounts and pages are just as much a part of the industry and media (both
independent and mainstream) as anything or anyone else. This is how I do a press release. I just write
something on a website.

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Chapter 4

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Saturday, June 16th, 2012

It is deeply rewarding and satisfying having what seems like a reserve of power in the bank.
WHERE does this power comes from? Beats me. Don't know. Ask someone else. It truly is a
mystery. All I know is my power reserve is at an all time high. I'm aware of it, but oddly enough
no one else around me seems to be. I'm okay. I couldn't care less if my reserve of power is
recognized. Just having it in reserve makes me plenty content and happy. It's the kind of power
I've always dreamed of having in my niche. Now that dream of power is real. Very real. I
manifested it. But I can't necessarily control all of it, because it's not all mine. It belongs to others
too.
When you have access to large amounts of power, you come to realize you're in reality sharing
that power. Most very powerful people who wield a large amount of influence and power do not
wield that power alone. Exclusive power is dangerous. I don't even know if high amounts of
exclusive power exist. Real power is shared and harmonious. No one person owns all the power.
Power is owned by groups of people. By teams. It's the power of teams. No one with real power
and influence gets to the top on their own.
You shouldn't aspire to be the "sole owner" of power. You should not aspire to have all the
power for you and you only, or just yourself. That's counterproductive. Power comes from
teamwork, the group of people working together and getting along. With the more power you
attain, the more you'll realize you're not the only person who has power. And you never will be
the only one with power. No one person controls all the power. That's a myth. A magic trick.
And illusion. Power Lists in magazines and on websites are a joke. No one is that powerful all by
themselves. Not even the MOST powerful, the Bill Gates, the Spielbergs, the George Lucases.
You're power will be shared with those who helped you get closer to your dream, whether you
want to share it or not. For every Bill Gates and George Lucas, there's 2 to 5,000 people working
for him, and sharing in his money and influence, but who also give back to him, and help him out
to. I don't believe in Power Monopolies. Especially nowadays. I'm not one of those. And I'm all
the better because of it.

When I'm writing a script, there's really only 2 main necessities of focus: Dialogue and
Description. Everything else is kind of just a branch on the tree of life, whether it's a scene,
character back story, or movement.
Screenwriting is mastered once one masters the 2 D's. Dialogue & Description. These will
guide you through many scenes both large and small. It's best to just keep practicing writing new
descriptions of events (And new dialogue) over and over.

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How to Write Dialogue:

Character always have, need, and can rely on words to express how they feel and what's going on
in their mind and thought process. Dialogue reveals the communication chemistry of your series,
and how characters show what they're thinking. It also helps progress the plot.

Character A
Hey. What's happening?
Yes. It really is that easy.

How to Write Description:

Description tells us what's going on onscreen. The movement, action, scenes, and events that are
happening in what is often real time. 1 page in a script equals around 1 minute of screen time,
give or take. Description is often just like writing a novel, except you rely heavily on outlines,
and the descriptions don't rely on in person details. Description is considerably more challenging
to conceive on the page than dialogue is, because it takes imaginative visionary powers of
visualization.

Mono descended down the staircase in torn clothes with a torch

in his hand, guiding his way with light through the dark of
the basement. I was a filthy basement full of dust, insects,
and rocks. Not very hospitable.
MONO
Hello?? Is there anyone here?

Scripts alternate between dialogue and description. And the best thing a screenwriter can do is
keep a steady alternating flow going between what's happening on the page/screen, and what
words are emerging from the character minds and mouths

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Areas of my animation I'd like to try my hand at:

Lighting Concept Design

Script
Storyboard

Already completed:

Character Design
Background Production Design

Thing I have: That make me stand out as an auteur

Comic Book Concept

Art on Animationmagazine.net
A Book on Amazon
Tons of Pre-Production Work

Never stop writing, never stop fighting. Never stop writing novels and outlines, and never stop
translating those fiction and outline pages to scripts. Never stop! Never stop developing scenes
for TV, and their structure and order of arrangement.
For some reason, spontaneous prose, nonfiction works that come and go straight from my mine
to the page somehow just feel more alive within me than fantasy or a magical illusion. The
illusion isn't real, but what happens in my life is. Real life story feels more alive to me than
fantasy story half the time. I wish there was a better way to work around this problem. Just
practice at making fantasy I guess. I guess I just have to find some way to make it interesting.
I don't think asking for 1 page of script a day (w/ description and/or dialogue) is really too much
to ask for. 1 script a day. Piece of cake.
Good words to use in fiction: Paramilitary, Bureau, Lieutenant, Colonel, Warrior, Soldier, Agent.
Mono Jubei has one mission in life. His mission is to hunt down and slay the King of Demons,
his Five Times Removed Brother Nosferatu, as a form of redemption for himself, who wants to
be accepted into the Kingdom of Heaven. He only believes God will accept him into the
Kingdom of heaven if he Slays his Evil Brother, Nosferatu, thus severing the tie that binds them.

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Sunday, June 17th, 2012,

By now I've produced well over 100 pages of fictional and fantastical literature. The first 100
pages of literature was relatively easy. It's the second batch of 100 more pages that's going to be
the Real Challenge. Not really, but I do like saying that.
Though I'm approaching 200 pages of new literature written, I'm now aware I'm actually a pretty
slow writer. My writing process is slow. I write one sentence here, one sentence there for my
fiction, then take one or a few breaks that last half the day or all night. Fortunately, I'm not alone
as a slow writer. JK Rowling and Stephen King also write like I do. They're also slow. I'm very
fast with my journal, but slow with almost everything else, particularly outlines, scenes,
fiction, and scripts.
But yeah, (I'm a) slow writer. I don't write fiction or scripts fast, or even in a consistent order
before I edit them. Slow is a means to an end, which is a finished manuscripts. The truth is,
"Getting there...slowly" is still "getting there".
In truth, How you write a script is just like How you write a novel. On and off, stop and go,
slowly, one sentence and inevitably, one paragraph and page at a time. Working up the nerve and
courage to forge ahead, each time you put words to a page and build your masterworks of
literature.
You build you story, plot, and outline, one sentence at a time. I didn't even realize how much
story I'd come up with until I actually did a page count more recently.

The thing they don't tell you about working in animation is that, yes, while I have made it
considerably far in the industry, is that, as a matter of fact, no, most people don't make it this far.
The only thing separating me from every other artist is I'm more tenacious than most. That, and I
have sage-patience. Plus, I'm experienced in and know how to endure through hostility, hardship,
and lack of support from my family or (sometimes) the industry. In a way, the folklore is kind of
true. The granting of a wish, or success in any field, can happen. But it comes with a price. How
patient are you? How good are you at not speaking publicly all the time? How badly do you want
to achieve your goal? What are you willing to sacrifice as a means to an end? You must ask
yourself these things and a lot more.
The thing about writing and art is, if you do what you're supposed to be doing all along (which is
writing and drawing a story), it really isn't very hard. But unfortunately, most people rarely just
do what they're supposed to do or what they assign to themselves in their mind. This is where all
the desperation, fretting, and frustration comes from: From when we work at a rate we
deem "too slow", or don't do what we tell ourselves to do, and our willpower fails us. We
only really fail when we don't do our self-assigned job, in a more permanent way. I do slack off a

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lot, and take my time to enjoy my life and recreational activities and I'm a slow worker, but
realistically speaking, I pretty much always eventually do my job, what I'm supposed to do. That
would be draw storyboards and write scripts. Everything else is a luxury, which I can't afford to
do or have.
But still, a job done patiently and slowly still counts. It still counts as work, even if you're slow
as a snail, like I am.
People whose biographies I'd like to read: Quentin Tarantino, College Dropout Billionaires,
George Lucas, JRR Tolkien, Walt Disney, Winsor McCay, Osamu Tezuka, HP Lovecraft,
Vincent Van Gogh, Pablo Picasso, Che Guevera, Bruce Lee.
Also, far as I know, the whole Gothic Epic Narrative thing is kind of new. JRR Tolkien meets
George Lucas and HP Lovecraft. Something like Elric of Melnibone. What I'm doing, in other
words. You can call it Dark Fantasy, or Gothic Fantasy, but call it what it is. A large, long
continuing piece of literature that's solid black as a design element. That is what Parallax is: Dark
Fantasy. I'm really itching to do an "inkish black cloak" version of Blade of the Immortal.
Truthfully, I'm not just A Epic Author. I'm The Only Epic Author whose audience feels like they
want to know personally, through the internet, if nothing else.
My early Commentary journals, the part where I said fatigue was causing me not to get more
work done, were wrong. I just work at a slower pace than most, due to how intense my emotions
are, and how much extra energy it takes me to work through my intense, powerful, and heavy
emotions. My slow work pace was not slowed down because of fatigue, even if I am manic
depressive. It was slowed down by being an artist and writer who takes his time and writes
slowly.
I'm one of, if not the most influential person in the world under 30, this side of the famous
billionaire Mark Zuckerberg and United States Nobel Prize-Winning President Barack Obama.
They really don't talk about anyone else of my stature and age online anywhere near as much.
Everything I do is news and gets on TV and in magazines. Everything! Who else is up there, in
terms of young rich people? Chad and Steve of YouTube. Justin Bieber. Harry Potter. Daniel
Radcliff.
Hmm. Should I have sex or shouldn't I? Honestly, I'd love to have sex. Numerous times. But I
just haven't found the right lady yet. I don't know if my line of work would eventually change
that, but honestly I suppose stranger things have happened. But really, am I really so much of a
rock star. Do women really swoon for me that much? Maybe. Even if they did swoon, I don't
know if that would help my chances of sleeping with women. I am an adult, and I deserve an
adult glass.

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Monday, June 18th, 2012,

Most comics nowadays kind of suck compared to what came out 11 years ago.
Come to think of it, why do Previews and Amazon even have a "bestseller" list? I have a larger
audience and larger brand recognition than most of these "bestseller" comics. It's kind of sad how
sneaky they are about the cold hard facts. If they really sold as many comics as they want you to
think they're selling, they'd post the actual sales figures, the actual numbers and figures of comics
copies sold. They never do though. That's because they don't want you to know how poor their
sales really are. I can't believe I ever wanted to be a part of that.
I can't let my genealogical ties to William the Conqueror of England and France end up being the
only thing I'm going to get famous for. I need to prove to the world I can stand on my own two
legs, even without a public legacy. My cultural heritage and lineage needs to stay secret. God
only know what the media would do if it got wind of this tie, and the truth behind it. Yes, I am a
blue blood, and I have ties to real power, but my blue blood heritage is not the only source of my
power. There's my technology media, literary, TV, cinematic, and art legacies.

Licensing in American animation isn't all that hard. Some people as of late seem to be attempting
to oversell, overhype, and overcomplicate it, making it seem as difficult as high powered rocket
science brain surgery in space. If you living in Japan maybe, Here, it's not that complex.

Creator makes a pitch to studio. Studio agrees.

Creator sells a project to a studio and network for licensing and development
Their legal department drafts up a contract
Creator sign off on the contract
Creator memorizes important elements of contract
Creator obeys his side of the deal
The show takes on a life all its own

I should be so lucky to get a deal like that. You don't need to be an expert at licensing just to be a
licensor. Your employer guides you through a lot of things.

The pilot for my series is currently being mapped out, and written. By me. The essential skeletal
system of the plot and story for my pilot is already mapped out for the most part. Now it's pretty
much just a matter of formatting it and pacing it like a proper 30-minute, 45-minute, or hour-long
TV story should be paced. The script for the pilot should go good with the series bible. The
hardest part of writing a script is probably just tying up all the loose ends. Tying everything up

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make sure it gets laced together into a cohesive unit of script. Fitting all the story, plot, and
narrative pieces together, making it work in terms of pacing and screen time.
Just finished revising my script outline for Episode 1: Parts 1 & 2.
The spec-pilot outline script is done. The plot for my first episode is more well organized now.
I'm not worrying too much about how fat or thin the script will be. I can trim it down later, when
I actually have material.
One thing most fans don't know about Steve Blum is, he can speak Japanese pretty well. He can
speak Japanese names fluently, and has often written dub scripts for Japanese to English ADR
translation. He definitely knows the language of both East and West. But it doesn't seem like
many people know how good Steve Blum's Japanese language skills are.
Things people don't know about Steve Blum:

He records most of his anime - Toonami - TOM lines in his home audio production
studio.
He speaks fluent Japanese
He's the most or one of the most prolific anime voice actors in the entire world
He's good friends with Shinichiro Watanabe and Wendee Lee
He doesn't specialize in pre-production or screenwriting. He's a voice acting specialist

Friday, June 22nd, 2012,

I seem to have inadvertently stumbled my way into the position of some form of authority over
an entirely new form of media: Streaming video! Woo-hoo. I'm the Ted Turner and or Sean
Akins of streaming video on and off line. I'm one of the closest things there is to a leader,
pioneer, and authority figure of the movement. I set the trends. I tell people what to think, watch,
and listen to. I influence the masses on an enormously vast scale. How the hell did that happen?
I'm not one to brag, but I'm a tastemaker and trendsetter, even though no one pays me for it, I'm
rewarded in other ways, like seeing my influence in action through the media. The moment I do,
think, write, say, produce, or post something, it becomes that much bigger. Sometimes
enormous. It's a job and status that's worth MORE than money. You can't put a price on that kind
of impact and influence. But by now my influence is becoming so forceful, it's getting more
difficult to hide, conceal, and generally keep invisible. A lot of people are aware of how
powerful I am by now.
I've found my Higher Calling. If I ever master animation and/or comics, I know exactly what I
want to do. I want to go back to school, either in California or Overseas. I want to study
computers, history, the Martial Arts, science, religion, or the Fine Arts, and get my honorary
degree. I was deprived of a real self-motivated education growing up, and I dropped out of

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school in Fort Lauderdale for a medical nervous breakdown, much to the disgrace of my mentor.
I never forgave myself for that. I need to further my education. I want to learn. I want to shut up,
listen to professors lecture for hours, and take my little notes, maybe even on a notebook
Macintosh. With actual funding and money, all things are possible. I now own a book on
William the Conqueror, my long lost relative, and all this history is really arousing my
fascination with French and British history, but it all started with learning I was born of
international blood. That and my fascination with Southeast Asian and French culture, in books
like Cracking the Japanese Market and The Greater Journey: Americans in France.
My stepmother and stepfather have parental issues. They want to be parents so bad they've
chosen to never stop being parents, which happens to mean they try to control and interfere with
every aspect of my life. I did great in art school. I was finally beginning to establish a free life for
myself, and I LOVED the autonomy and freedom. No no. They "Had to put a stop to that." They
just couldn't let go. At some point you HAVE TO stop being a parent and let your adult child be
an adult, otherwise it's not healthy anymore, and you're doing more harm than good, leaving a
legacy of overbearing dysfunction. It's ruining my life. The pseudo-mental illness, this mania shit
and "bipolar and asperger's" shit is the whole ADD thing all over again. They find a perceived
flaw they read too much into, develop irrational fears and anxieties about it, and suddenly that's
there's excuse to try to coerce me into psychiatric wards and put me on addictive weight gaining
medications. That's their excuse for not letting me grow up and be independent and autonomous.
A perceived fear about an imagined defect on my part they intentionally over-exaggerate and
even go so far as to get government handouts for it, all in an effort to keep me from teaching
myself to be a fully functional, normal, well adjusted, capable adult who doesn't need them
anymore, because they're obsessed with staying overbearing antisocial and sociopathic parents
for the rest of their lives. It's tragic, but it's not my problem. I'll move out when I get some
money and get a job as a writer finally and leave them in the dust, which is how it needs to
happen. I can't let those idiots control every aspect of my waking life like that for the next twenty
years. I'll be damned if I'm not going to learn to move out, drive, fly, live, mate, and clean
myself. Those are minor details. Not a big deal. I'm perfectly capable of doing those things, and
even if I'm not I can find someone supportive and loving who isn't Mom or Dad (on my own like
Nicole, Phil, or Chris Hess) who can help me. I need to find the RIGHT girl. I need to find a girl
who can replace my mom. Not an easy task. Mom's a bit obsessive. Like a deranged wife of
some sort who never BACKS THE FUCK OFF.

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Saturday, June 23rd, 2012,

Sweet Jesus there's some messed up stuff that's happened with religion in the last 15 years.
Pedophile priests? 9-11? "Radical" Islam? Terrorism preaching arab superiority? My father must
be rolling over in his grave.

I, Saga
There are two main epic sagas in my life. There's the epic saga of fantasy and fiction, which I
created Mono my fictional hero for.
And then there's the epic 6,000 autobiography and biography of myself, of me, of I. My life and I
are just as important and epic as the stories I write. I, Egypt. I, Obama. I, Anime. I, CN. And then
there's I, YouTube, and I, Internet.
I've had some serious problems at DeviantArt, ASMB, WCN, and Blogger, who all practice a
form of click fraud that they victimize users with known as "click concealment". If you don't
want someone to be popular online, it's a stealthy and popular technique to use against that
person, to send a false message about them to their audience that "no one likes them online". A
lot of the clicks to my material are concealed, staying at 1 and 0 when in fact I hear dozens of
people in the media paraphrasing those quotes directly, not even making an effort to conceal that
they visited my webpage.

Overnight Insomnia Domination is Back, Bitches!

No more being tranquilized like an animal at nightimes. I'm taking sleeping pills and sedatives
during the day, when all the shitty ass childrens TV shows are on. That way instead of them
torturing and bitch slapping me, I sleep right through all of them, and instead probably end up
staying up even later without getting too tired. Which is good news for late night TV networks.
Now they won't have to go without ratings I give them anymore. And I can get work done at
nighttime, if I'm not too tired. I'll have to see how tonight goes. But I already took Depakote
earlier, which I normally take at 11 or midnight. Instead of making me sleep through the entire
night, I slept for 2 to 3 hours in the evening, and I'm up again. It's 11:08 as I write this. What a
miraclc. I'm awake during late night again! And in the future I'm gonna sleep all day, because
daytime is evil and sucks. The Night is Awesome. It's when I can relax and watch cool TV!
Finally! After more than a Decade, I arise into the depths of the night again. Not a vampire. But I
am a nocturnal creature. Suppressing that nocturnal impulse with drugs, as my parents attempted
to do, and succeeded at for a long time, was contrary to my nature.

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Sunday, June 24th, 2012,

Crawl Before You Learn to Walk

Do the easy things before you do the hard things.

Start off easy, and gradually increase the difficulty of your attempts
Master general drawing before you master animation or comics
Master writing and general English before you learn to tell a story.
Small before big.
Slow before fast.
Simple before complex.
Always start off easy. Gradually ease into difficult and hard. Don't skip ahead.

The Oranges of Wrath

Then one day, the rain clouds came. And once they arrived, they turned everything in
Casselberry gray. And the sun left, being replaced by the grayest and saddest of clouds, with the
most volatile temperaments to create the most volatile storms.

I write at least 1 story a day. Every single day, I write a new story. It's called life. Living life.
The linear narrative sequence of the events of life. I'd do well to remember that. Whatever you
did that day or night is your story for that day or night, which you are free to embellish and add
on to or fictionalize in any way you see fit. Just by being alive, we're already writing stories
every single day, even if we choose not to write them down.
I am The Man
I am Getting Older
I am NOTE Frank Miller, Katsuhiro Otomo, Todd McFarlane, George Lucas, or Dave Sim
I am Amazing as I am
I Am Me
I Am Me
I Am Me!
It's Pointless to try being someone else who's similar, because I AM ME!!!!
I just realized this!

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You can't go around trying to re-create other artists' styles just because they won the admiration
of the artists who you admire (see Otomo and McFarlane). You have to be yourself. You have to
accept yourself and your drawing and writing style for what you are and what it is! It's called
self-acceptance and being good enough. Eventually you stop trying to please your parents.
Eventually you stop trying to win over and desiring to win over their approval, after you learn
they're not as powerful or perfect or amazing as you always used to think they were growing up.
Then you learn the real truth. They're inferior to you, their own child. And they've got even more
flaws than you do. And that it's a bad idea to listen to them, because they're never happy with the
fact that you're the Greatest, Most Influential Person in the History of the World according to the
Media.
I can't live my life trying to be Otomo and Todd McFarlane. At some point in your life you
realize you need to be you. The biggest shoes to fill will be your own.
I can't do a Cerebus. I can't do an Akira. But I can do a fucking amazing End Times. I can do an
amazing Mono, Parallax, and WCN Account. That's something those guys never did. Never
spend your life striving to mimic the achievements of someone else. When you're young it's
natural to go in that direction, the path of plagiarism and mimicry and copying, but eventually
you wise up. And eventually, like say, at age 28 to 29 you really do start being yourself.
I don't plan on learning too many new skills. I'm really mostly just planning to get by on my
writing.
I'd normally brag on Twitter or Blogger about what a successful days writing work I had today.
But there really isn't a need for that. Bragging about your productivity online to make people
think you're productive, which I am, achieves the opposite. It makes me look insecure and
lacking in self-confidence. It's truly better to say NOTHING to the MASSES! You Brainless
Mutants.

Monday, June 25th, 2012,

Today is the 25th of June. Know what day that is? It's PITCH PARTY DAY! BIG DAY 1!
They're announcing the winners of the online portion of the PITCH PARTY contest today.
Voting has finished, and now we get to see who got the most votes from people across the web.
Now I get to see whether or not I made it!

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When you reach your later art years, when trying to decide what you can do and will do, and
what you're able to do, look not so much to "What you want to do" or ""What others do that you
want to do". Look instead to "All that you have already done". "What you've already done" and
"What you are doing right now" is "What you are and always will be able to do."
While I didn't pioneer the "Checkerboard Noir Manga Inking Technique", I did pioneer it and do
new things with it. Other artist who use black panels include Dave Sim, Frank Miller, Jim
Mahfood, Jhonen Vasquez, Jamie Hewlett, Jeff Smith, Paul Pope, and Mike Mignola.
Yes Yes. Very well, William the Conqueror is my long lost ancestor many times removed. No
wonder there's so many people impersonating me on TV, and no wonder I've recently ended up
on so many TV shows and have no privacy and no peace of mind. It's not me their fascinated by.
It's the relative of a historic figure they're fascinated by. Groupies. History Groupies. I know
that's probably newsworthy, but I'm not a very newsworthy in and of myself. Quite dull, actually.
But fortunately, I'm a good writer.
Lesson 1: If people in the animation press want to write articles about you and feature you as a
centerpiece, always plug your book, show, comics, and/or website whenever possible. That's
pretty much how it works, is it not? That's what PR is. The Press writes features on you, and you
talk about your experiences and what you're doing and working on. What's your story?!
And from my experience, more often than not, it's not a matter of "being crazy" like mommy and
daddy whine. If you Feel Powerful, you Are Powerful.
The buildings in my best cityscape sketches are too close together. I need to work towards
conveying a groundedness of the buildings, drawing them from the ground, not just flying
through the air. Give that flying camera some gravity. I'm going to establish roads,
intersections, cars, vehicles, and depth between the buildings with shops and streets and
people. I'm also going to start incorporating cityscapes and cluttered city shots into regular
formerly blank panels, like I'd draw them any other way.

Discipline
Willpower
Patience
Self-Confidence
Energy
The Gestation Period

These are all traits you're going to need if you want to be a high quality artist.
In terms of reactions to my designs, anything with swords, guns, badass longcoats, and lots of
ink usage, my Dad hates but the industry loves. It's an awful contradiction. My Dad hates just
about all my favorite artists except a few, which really aren't even that popular. "I draw as good

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as Dragonball" I told him. "Well yeah," he shot back. "That's not very hard to do. I'd hardly call
that an achievement" Actually it IS hard to beat Dragonball. "But the guy who does Dragonball
has at least $40 million in the bank. He got RICH off of it" "Still, not very hard to do," he said.
Or almost any anime for that matter. But only a young cutting edge fan and artist could realize
that, NOT a geezer like my Dad.
2012 Pitch Party Voting has concluded, and while not disastrous like AnimeTV, bottom line, I
lost. But that's all right. My parents are still proud of me for making the effort, and I'm not
deterred from eventually pitch my same concept I entered into Pitch Party 2012, and submitting
it elsewhere. I don't really even feel discouraged about losing the contest. I'm glad I made the
effort to keep a level head.
Writing Checklist:

Dialogue
Description
Plot
Beginning
Middle
End
Protagonist
Antagonists
Outline
Scene
Action (Movement)
Drama (Death)

On the Agenda:

Pilot script
Analyze and transcribe Old Writing
Storyboarding, "Scaling"
Building my Self-Confidence by reading new book
Re-studying patience notes
Expanding Story Synopsis
Checkerboard Panel Generator
Process for making composited comics page
Picking out art for my comics and storyboards, from the pile.

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After how much work I've put into all my output, I don't think I even have an End Game
anymore. Just keep working and progressing from day to day, each and every day. When I was
young, my End Game most certainly would have been to be King of an Empire, or a Leader
leading an industry. But such is not really my intent lately. I just like the process. I like to go off
my meds and draw, and just enjoy myself, and write like James Joyce and William Shakespeare,
banging together scripts, storyboards, comics, designs, backgrounds, and whatnot. My intent is
evolving. My End Game is Today. Stay focused on what I'm going to do Here and Now. Today
and Tomorrow. How I can make every moment count. I already reached what I was striving for
at one point: To be on the market and able to sell crap to people. It's harder than it looks. The
superstars make it look easy, but as obvious signs from the Heavens would indicate, I'm not in
reality one of those. In reality I'm NOT a star, or a bestseller. I just make all my bosses really,
really rich. But that wealth they accumulate...They never take a moment out of their day to even
CONSIDER sharing some of their immense wealth with me through royalties, residuals, or any
other form of productivity compensation. My bosses online and in the media are perfectly happy
to let me work for nothing. And technically there's nothing I can do about that. The odds are
stacked against my favor and wealth. Isn't going to happen. But what is going to happen is I keep
doing what I've been doing.

Wednesday, June 27th, 2012,

Well, I lost the Pitch Party Contest, but fortunately, I seem to be on the rebound now that I have
a script I'd been working on during the contest) partially completed.
As far as my Parallax Pilot Script goes, as far as progress, I'm 8 pages deep! Only 14 more pages
of script to go. There's a decent amount of scene scriptage I haven't written yet.
Thursday, June 28th, 2012,
I grew up in a conservative family setting rooted in American tradition, where science,
perspective, the internet, choreography, the martial arts, film, Japan, Europe, France, anime,
comic books, art, design, literature, and anime "Don't matter, are silly, stupid, and aren't worth
pursuing". That was the message that was delivered to me by my parents. That my passions
didn't matter in the Almighty America. I was free to pursue such things, but I was treated like
my efforts and obsessions didn't matter in the big scale of things. They mattered to me a whole
lot, and they were worth pursuing.
When pitching an idea, an animated bible, in terms of a polished presentation is more important
to have, collectively speaking, with all the departments in place, than just a script by itself. If you
can (have the capabilities to) make a presentation for every department or make an entire
animation reel, or at the very least a bible covering all the major elements of pre-production (like
what I'm working on) you definitely should. In the case of selling series bibles, more is definitely

P a g e | 477

more profitable than less. The more you have to show of spec pre-production work, the better,
not the "less" or "less is more". Do the best series bible you can possibly do. Show your work to
friends and colleagues and ask for feedback. MIPCOM is where most European co-production
deals in Europe happen, according to the Editor of a famous animation publication. MIPCOM is
the Comic-Con of co-pros.
When producing content for animation, the web, and comics, it's a bad idea to look too far ahead.
If you're truly putting all your focus, work, and energy into your current work, it can be
downright possible to look more than 1 or 2 years (if that) into the future. Business begets living
in the moment.
One thing to watch in corporations is how they incentivize employees and contributors. How do
they reward the people who provide them with work. Incentive Systems should be analyzed and
explored.
Adaptations are platform neutral
Platform = Medium: TV, Film, Animation, Video Games, Comics, Books
Content = Story, Art, Movement, Editing, Pacing, Rhythm, Composition
Question: How to attract and reward the greatest talent in the world, and inspire them to work
with you on project, without them not enjoying their work and feeling like it's not rewarding to
work with you as a producer.

Friday, June 29th, 2012,

I've discovered 2 sites, which I'm currently investigating:

Videorix.com
Sponsoredtweets.com
text-link-ads.com
backlinks4u.com

It's as simple as this: If it makes money - it's a hit.

My book brings up around 50 different Google search results if you type the full name in to
Google's search engine. But you could say that about any book in stock on Amazon, could you
not?

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For a moment there, I forgot about my adolescent desire for power and world domination, to be
the King of All Media and Rule a Vast Media Empire of Stuff.
My Empire has grown considerably, since I first started building it

Saturday, June 30th, 2012,

I don't like reading comics made by people who have a lot of money or are making a lot of
money off of their work. If you're drawing AND making money, I'm sure I hate you. That pretty
much includes anyone working in television and anime, and anyone on Amazon. REAL art is
made by an artist who isn't corrupted or perverted by money. Money is for perverts. Money is
perverted. Money corrupts and exploits. Pirated, unpaid TV is the best TV. The people making
broadcasts for no money are more inspired than broadcasters who get paid. Like I said, money is
for perverts.

Public showcases are so fatiguing for me. If I do ANYTHING publicly, it drains me of a lot of
time and energy unnecessarily. I don't have the energy or patience to deal with the public
domain. The mainstream and people who follow it are so STUPID! I hate it!!! I hate pandering to
the mainstream. That's something I will never do. I'd rather rot in obscurity than sell out. Rivers
Cuomo thinks if things are in obscurity, they're "rotting". I wish I was blind enough to think that
way. But I'm not. I'm smart just like him, but I'm not eager to be in the limelight as he seems to
have been during the 90s. Obscurity is a good thing. It is an escape from the limelight, which is
based on compromise. I can't work if I feel I'm being discussed, analyzed, or talked about. I get
stagefright, except it's not on a stage. I can sense when others are discussing me and talking
about me. They don't have to admit it. I know when they're talking about it (me) anyway. I don't
like being talked about. People never say anything positive or good. Just 1,001 insults, put
downs, and backhanded compliments. Fuck them. Honestly, I'm NOT interested in "constructive
criticism". When's the last time any criticism regarding me was constructive?

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Intelligent Action Cartoons

One of the things I've applied my brainpower to is making smart action cartoons. Starting with
comics and ending with co-productions and anime.
I take influence from smart action films and shows:
John Woo, AKIRA, Ghost in the Shell, Gundam, Pulp Fiction, Kill Bill, The Matrix, Chinese
Wuxia, and the like are all intelligent action filmmaking, whether it's on paper or on the screen.
Whether it's either of those things, it's visual intelligence. I'm visually intelligent.
As for weapons. Always write them in as a self-defense mechanism. Don't just use guns and
blades to go on killing sprees and rampages in your stories (JTHM style). There has to be a
reason and justification for a gun or a sword being there, and that reason is usually to defend the
main characters from attackers and enemies.
Part of the reason I like making action cartoons so much is because for the most part execs and
producers haven't historically even tried to make smart action cartoons in America the way they
have traditionally in Japan and France. There's nothing wrong with having a character reciting
Shakespeare, existentialist literature, or the Bible, while gripping a beretta. If anything the words
and pontification make the action better, and appealing on more than one level.

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One thing I am, and that I know I am is: I'm visually intelligent. I'm a visionary. I'm a deep
visual thinker. I understand visual complexity, both in what I visualize, and in what I see others
visualize.
Common Characteristics
Good at solving visual puzzles
Enjoyed geometry in school
Good at drawing
Can visualize pictures in head
Notices colors and shapes
Enjoys photography
Good with directions
Can remember places vividly
Good at artistic composition
Likes books with pictures

Visually Intelligent Phenomena:

Detailed Artwork
Comic Books
Architecture, Film Architecture,
Organic Architecture
Film Architecture
Model Sheets
Production Design
Conceptual Design
Lighting Design
Costume Design
Co-Productions (French, Japanese)
Anime
Design
Indie Comics
Moebius
Martial Arts Choreography
Fight Scenes
Action Movies and Cartoons
Art Movements
Music Videos
Schematics
Painting
Pen and Ink
Black and White Artwork

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God Grant Me,

Patience to wait out the time when I'm not inspired by just about anything, and have to
wait out the fatigue of the art process.
Courage to not be intimidated by Competition or Enemies.
Focus to Tune Out The Outside World and
Focus to look beyond Society When it wants to mess with me and Get Inside My Head
Strength & Energy to Start and Complete My Work
Will Power, to not forget what and where I'm working for, and start work anew each day.

Patience, Courage, Focus and Energy.

I've got to accept I'm not going to be drawing all the time, all day every day.
I've got to accept that I'm really only going to be able to draw on and off, mostly during
the day, and only every once in a while. It's impossible for me to work with the intensity
and consistency that the Japanese and French work with. It's a slower, more domestic
work rate and system. Not by choice of course. I have no control over my work
environment. It's impossible to control my family. I've tried every trick in the book.
They're a steamroller. And they've run me over MANY times, including often when I'm
working.

Sunday, July 1st, 2012,

Most Japanese don't care about what Americans are drawing, I kind of suspect, with rare
exceptions. Most Japanese don't follow the western art world, let alone endorse or enjoy it.
Japanese mostly care about things drawn by other Japanese, and that's pretty much it. The only
art Japanese care about for the most part is the Japanese art interpreted from my own. Meaning
most don't give two shits what I do with my career. Well some might, but they're in the minority
of the Japanese population. That's because my work isn't technically Japanese. It was drawn by
an American artist, and a sloppy one at that.
I started an art-&-writing journal today. Just clipped some old pages together, now I have the
first form of my visual journal for the month of July.
If you're writing in your journal when you should be writing fiction, short stories, scripts, and
novels, you may as well be masturbating your whole career away. Journaling is an intellectual
form of shameless masturbation. It's a habit I plan on quitting. For good, if possible. Eureka.
That is a definitely what my journaling needs: A little bullying, a little punishment and

P a g e | 482

belittlement, just for even trying. Like now. Only dumbass perverts write journal. I think my IQ
got cut in half by reading this.

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Chapter 5

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Monday, July 2nd, 2012,

Have started to keep a visual journal, or "art journal" to document my visual work and visual
thoughts and thinking on paper, using a sketchbook, copier paper, printouts, and scotch tape.
I got around 57 pages of Book-Zine: Volume I done today. The book includes articles, self-made
writing, online art, sketches, sketchbook pages, comics (by me and others), and xeroxed book
pages. It's a combination of a book and a magazine. It's also a way for me to create new
manuscripts (with hundreds of pages) more quickly.

Tuesday, July 3rd, 2012,

Life seems to be going pretty all right. And all it took was a lifetime of struggle. But I wouldn't
change it for anything.
Maybe I should go back to talking about anime. Well, I can talk about my anime (which I made),
or I can talk about established anime. Either one is fine by me.
If you have something, chances are people, with less than you have, will make an attempt to
come along and take it, just like any other thieves. That's just how the market works. Best to
prepare for such deception. The truth is, you have to stand up for yourself, and defend what's
yours. Don't let them get away with that, whatever it is they're trying to take from you that you've
earned. That's some of the best advice I've ever gotten. Keep what's yours. Defend it
aggressively. Don't let other people bully you out of what you've achieved. Because they will
come. They will come along and they will try to do just that, taking and pillaging.
I've had time to realize...With the older I get, the deeper I'll be connected to the 0.001%. I'm okay
with living an isolated existence. It has its rewards. I'm just now starting to live up to the
expectations I had set for myself so long ago.
There's got to be something better and more fulfilling to do with my time than watched that
stupid goddamed anime all day and night. I don't want to be a loser 12 year old. Being an anime
fan ain't what it used to be. I'm ready to move on to other hobbies besides anime. Anime from
Japan is so formulaic, it gets boring after a while. Plus, anime doesn't pay. I suppose there's
books and traditional action animation. Anything but anime. After spending so much time
obsessing about anime and getting absolutely nothing in return out of it, other than a lot of grief
from arrogant newbie fans half my age, I've had my fill of it. Pretty much. I'll still watch, but I
won't be addicted to watching it like I was.

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Wednesday, July 4th, 2012,

Happy Birthday America!

I've been using Adsense since January 2011, I think. So on Adsense, I make around 3 dozen
dollars a year. That's how much I got paid at the beginning of July.
Know what's a good booster of self confidence? Why, Money & Power of course!

Thursday, July 5th, 2012,

As a Scorpio, Money and Power increase my confidence by a ton. That's probably how it is for a
lot of people. The more money and power I have, the more confidence I have.
My Klout account says I'm influential about Community, Video, Antivirus, Anime, & Money.
To a small degree. Nothing big.
One way to have more in your life, and lead a more rewarding life is to not focus on what you
don't have, and instead focus on what you do have. If our expectations are realistic, chances are
we will be less disappointed by our achievements. Having the most or being the best, isn't really
something to plan for. But planning to have a little bit, or be sort of better than the other choices
sounds a bit less crazy.
Utilizing Adsense and Adbrite - Steps:
1.
2.
3.
4.
5.
6.
7.

Establish and construct Adsense and Adbrite user accounts.

Once ads are functional, composition them on all my pages
Enable Adsense on Video Account
Wait a few weeks, then a few months
Analyze Analytics figures. Tabulate Weekly Profits.
Collect at the end of each month and/or year
Repeat if Necessary

Traffic Stats:
1.
2.
3.
4.

YT: 80-130+ hits / Day

Macabre Blog: 40-60 hits / Day
Other Blogs: Unknown / Day
Webcomics: 5-10 hits / Day

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Note to Self:

Make all Blogs I own visible and Searchable through and in Google
Connect all blogs to Adbrite and Adsense Simultaneously
Fill each Blog with Banner Ads for and underneath Each Post, Every Time

Types of Blogs

Journal (Macabre)
Manifesto
Art
Essay
Poetry

Friday, July 6th, 2012,

I make potential money and royalties from traffic to 5 blogs, 1 video site, and 1 webcomics site.
Notes on censorship to achieve a larger revenue share and audience:
Don't cuss so much in blogger. Keep it at a family friendly PG level. No curse words.
If my success continues, which it might because I am good, I might actually retire from art. Art
is kind of a waste and unneeded pressure and stress. And if I can go the easier route, I will.
Apparently I have a lot of subscribers on YouTube. Too bad I don't have more videos to upload.
It's harder to upload anime and music to YouTube now than it ever was before. It's the curse of
YouTube's own popularity. Uploading new material that people would actually watch isn't easy
like it was 7 years ago. I mean, it's still possible, but it's just kind of different now. I knew my
videos (mostly Gorillaz) got around 447,000 views, but I wasn't even aware I had 82 subscribers
until just today. There are some weird people subscribing to my channel. But I suppose every big
audience has its share of eccentrics.
Adbrite and Adsense, are pretty reliable, in terms of figures tabulation and sponsorship support.
I've made a tiny amount of profit already, and I don't even have most of my promos up yet.
Among the sites I run, I run 8 sites that I get paid and compensated for in some way, some more
than others.
Ahhh. Sales are brisk. I'm surprised how popular my own websites are. I have numerous
websites that are popular.

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Saturday, July 7th, 2012,

By the time I'm 35, I'm going to be The Action Master. I'm the
Lord of Action. Fuck yeah. My Title means exactly what it sounds
like. I'm one of the Main Masters of the Action Genre. Oh yeah!
I'm a wimp in person, and I don't give a crap about that,
because I'm a Page-Warrior. I'm the Paper-Warrior. I can whoop
any man's ass on paper. My Neighbors the Audio Terrorists,
Bryan, Bellamy, ANYBODY!! Fuck em' all. I can kick all their
asses on the page. And I will too. To Death. Ain't Nobody Can
Touch Me on The Page. If it's me vs. You on the page, I'ma
fuckin' KILL YOU...Karate Shaolin Kung-Fu Style. On the page, I
dodge punches/kicks, throw blows, block, chop, punch, punch,
kick, double flip, SLAM SLAM SLAM BAM BAM BAM. SLICE, STAB. Grab
em' by the throat and don't let go.
Beats by the RZA.
Produced by Quentin Tarantino
Choreographed by Yuen Woo-Ping
Screenplay by JM (aka Me)

When things get built of great size, sometimes that also means things get destroyed of great size
as a result.
DESTROY! BUILD! DESTROY!!!!!!!

I demolished the American Animation industry / Disney to Build Anime as a prosumer.

I demolished Cartoon Network to Build Adult Swim and Toonami.
I demolished TV, Movies, & Hollywood to Build Internet Broadcasting and Streaming
Video.
I helped Demolish Old 90s Disney Feature to Build 2000s Disney TV Animation & Pixar
I demolished Saturday Morning Cartoons to help Build Animation on Cable TV
I played my part in the Downfall of the Comics Direct Market as a result of helping to
Build the Manga Bookstore Market
The success of my support of digital stores like Amazon and Netflix contributed to The
Fall of Borders and Blockbuster
Demise = Rise

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I've left my share of market destruction in my wake. And it comes with a heavy price. I'm both
The Great Demolisher of Old Legacies and The Builder of New Ones

I can't wrap my head around that question to solve the mystery of it. What am I? I have many
names. I am many things to many people. I hold many professional titles. I have many skills. But
a well rounded definition of myself? That's a challenge. Apparently some say my life is full of
"infamy and ridicule" that "I've chosen for myself". Funny, but somewhat inaccurate.
I'm dropping the Strebler. From now on, I'm just going to go as JM. Period. That's my entire
stage name. JM. By now, it's recognizable enough.
END TIMES, Parallax, Novels, Comics, Autobiographies. All will have JM as an author with
not discernible last name. JM or Spindack is my name I'll go with in print and on screen.
Therefore:
[JM Strebler]
[JM Matthews]
[JM Sorrell]
R.I.P.
I'll name my company either JM Productions or Spindack Media.
Toonami's on. That's a miracle. But I'm not going online. Time to let someone else have the
spotlight for five seconds. I've hogged enough of it. To which I happily acquiesce. I'll just hide
out here in Microsoft Word. Where all the cool kids hang out when Toonami's not on.
This black beard of mine is getting pretty bushy. I wonder what it will look like in a few years. I
wonder how it will look with my mustache and afro. I'm a very hairy man. Not clean shaven like
the general Me As Seen On TV. But having a bushy beard on my jaw line is nice. It goes well
with my persona as a writer, author, and filmmaker. I don't know about the whole graphic novel
thing.
When I stopped at the store to cash my check from Google, no one seemed to recognize me at all
from TV or the internet or anything. It was an amazing feeling, being incognito again. With my
beard no one recognized me. All people know of is the clean shaven me, and occasionally when I
grow my hair out to form a medium sized afro. It's weird how unrecognizable a beard makes you
when you're out in public. Everybody recognizes the clean shaven one. No one recognizes the
bearded one.

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New ideas for characters came in the brain-mail today: A doctor,

a surgeon, a monk, an evil monk who's the rival of the good
monk, a King, and a man who walks with a cane because one of his
legs is fake and he's literally handicapped, but has a wise and
positive outlook. That last one is an Oliver-E character, or a
New-Earth University PhD. Professor.

Sunday, July 8th, 2012,

I've got a brand new hobby now. I collect import, un-translated French "Tomes", or manga and
comic books
So far I own 5 books. I have 5 Tomes. I started collecting French Tomes around September of
2011.
The place I buy all my Tomes from is Amazon France (Amazon.fr). Their actually pretty cheap,
and on top of that, they're a collector's item.

One question I get all the time about my money and my artwork is:
"How'd you do it?"
"What's your secret?"
"How would you even go about learning how to draw that way? Can I learn that?"
"How do I learn how to draw that way / like that?"
A lot of people know of my work. But a lot of people also don't know my secret, which is to say,
"How I do what I do".
There's a thaumaturgy, mystery, mysticism, visionary fantasy, secrecy, and magic about my art
style.

Monday, July 9th, 2012,

Okay, currently I'm using Blogger, and for my blogs I'm using Adsense and Adbrite. And for
YouTube, I'm using Adsense.

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If you ask me, Mono Jubei is way more Duke (GI Joe) and Motoko (Ghost in the Shell) than ever
was Ichigo. He was never based on Ichigo in any way. Their a similar facial structure, but the
face is where the similarities end. Just saying.
I have 5-10 years worth of material to write, upload to, and post to my blog. And that's without
producing anything new in the future. I'm just getting started
Influences:

I get my love for comics and cartooning from my old animation mentor, Phil, who was
big on classical animation.
I got my love of computers, the internet, and tech from my old high school friend, Tony,
who was a webmaster.
I get my eye for realism and detail from my fine arts mentor, Donna, and my old fine arts
teacher, Rima.
I get my militant approach to action and fantasy storytelling from my brother, Andrew
I get my miserly managerial sense from my adoptive Dad.
I get my weird design and conceptual art sensibilities from my Eurasian-American
Heritage. That and my old film teacher, Clay Holliday, who is very into international film
and animation. I used to just think I was obsessed, until one day when I found out I was
Eurasian in reality.

And sure, I've created and designed some famous archetypes in my day:
Such as:

The "Badass Longcoat"

Dual Wielding Sword Slinger
Apocalypse Science-Fantasy Mythology
The Sharpshooter Gunman-Swordsman
The Fatal Brother-Brother Battle
The Inky Black Figure
The Dark Energy and Dark Power
The Flying Badass Loncoat Dual Wielder
Militant Wuxia
The Demon-Slayer Quest
The Organic Architecture Ledge Crouching On-Looking Hero (France)
The Fiery Redhead Badass-Longcoat wearing Tomboy Chick
The Goth Secretary
The Notan Black Cover
Acrylic Clouds

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The British Tyrant

The Blaxploitation Military Teammate
The Hacker Brat (Created in Cowboy Bebop with Ed)

Let's just say I've thought of some clever and original ideas in my day
As far as accurate public persona's go, Huey Freeman and William Murderface are actually
pretty accurate depictions of me as the media perceives me. I may look like Huey Freeman in the
head, and dress like Huey Freeman, but I have the body and problems Murderface has ("the
satirically infamous "Jack-Off Gate" political incident. That probably WOULD happen if I ran
for local congress. It's essentially a mirror image of how that incident was perceived by the
public and media in real life. I found the Murderface version considerably funnier though LOL).
For some reason that never seemed to happen to Huey. Lucky black bastard. Still, I get a pretty
good laugh out of those two shows. Very well scripted satire. And not too far off from reality.
The legend is all true. They're not necessarily making a lot of that up. All the fear and irony is
there. But yeah. William Murderface + Huey Freeman + Frylock = Me
I think I'm suffering from the Robert E. Howard Conan curse. I'm the next Robert E. Howard.
But I don't want to end up killing myself and committing suicide. Like Robert E. Howard. It
must have been the stress of epic genius that drove him over the deep end. His creativity was just
that Powerful, he was crushed under the weight of the Boulder of his own Divine Genius. No one
really knows Why Robert E. Howard took his own life, so I admit the comparison is a bit creepy,
you know, the tragic death element and all that. The posthumous success thing. Primus, Slayer,
and Pantera make the best soundtrack for Conan. That and Ozzy Osbourne. And Steve Blum and
Arnold Schwarzenegger. Okay. It's powerful. We get it, Joe! But do you? Do you really???
Webcomics, Video Games, Novels, Comic Books: Are not a TV Show!

The Terrorists
The Feds
The Police
The Republicans
The Tea Party
The Democrats
The Military and Navy
The Floridians
The Japanese
The Cartoons
The Witch Hunters
The Zombies
The Egyptians

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The African-Americans
The Chinese
The Koreans

Tuesday, July 10th, 2012,

So, I've taken to a few new hobbies.

Abstaining from discussion of me online.

Online gambling (the slots)
Collecting French Comic Book Tomes
Running an online Blog Franchise
Budgeting
Developing and Building Self-Confidence

Wednesday, July 11th, 2012,

Things are going well for me. I seem to be closer than ever to following my dream of living a
double identity as an Animator-Cartoonist, or Creator-Producer, in both the fields of comics and
animation. Comics is for laying the groundwork. Animation is for Teamwork. I'm the first
American since Katsuhiro Otomo to be this successful at crossing over and traveling or
traversing between the two landscapes of comics and animation. Even Otomo himself seems to
acknowledge that fact. That's my field of expertise: Comics, Animation, and Translating the
Visual Language and Literature of Comics to the Language, Design, Art and Cinema of
Animation. I've been Awakened to the 2 Facts That:
1. There's a lot of things Comics-Manga People don't know about Animation-Anime.
2. There's a lot of things Animation-Anime People don't know about Comics-Manga.
There's a lot of ignorance hidden between the workers in the two fields and mediums. My goal is
to teach people how to be more well rounded in general, able to adapt to both mediums, and
therefore more they become more employable, and less unemployed by being multifaceted.
Synthetic-Transmutation.
The Devil Seeks To Distract Us
Meanwhile God Wants To Help Us Focus
I've got to figure out a way to maintain my focus now that I'm starting to have a little bit of real
money and influence-power. The more energy and power you have, the harder it is and the

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harder it will be to focus. The Devil will give you a lot of distractions. Especially when you're at
the top.
There are some main types of power:

The Power of Reward

The Power of Punishment
The Power of Authority
The Power of Expertise and Knowledge
The Power of Approval and Acceptance

Success in the last few days:

Paycheck from Popular Business Arrived

New Digital Version of Animag July/August Issue arrived in gmail inbox

Side Effects:

Question whether I want to continue working and trying so hard

Not wanting to do things I don't want to do so much (symptom of success)

2012 is a Power Year For Me

It's my most successful year yet, in terms of material possessions

Thursday, July 12th, 2012,

I'm not actually able to travel through my own pathway, but in reality, yes, I am The Window
and Portal to Success. People seem to need me to be successful. And yet I never am myself.
So, my legendary courage is manifesting when I'm challenged once again. I'm taking a stand
against Google now, probably one of the biggest corporations in the world, and certainly one of
the most powerful. Google is a [Copyright] Monster that in some ways I helped make. I created
this juggernaut, and it refused to truly acknowledge me. It takes a lot of courage to stand up to a
company like Google and request equal treatment. But they're not right entirely. Not in terms of
my relationship with them. Sure I still use their website. That's not the problem. Their websites
are used by everyone. But they....Eh, I'll go into more detail when more progress is made.
But realistically speaking, Everyone likes to take. No one likes to give. And a whole lot of
people apparently want to take what's not given to them, or be really stupid like I was and give
away what others constantly and shamelessly take from them. You have to protect what's yours,
or it Will Get Taken, probably by con artists and thieves (even if it's emotional theft of trying to
bite your style), which is mostly the case. By now, I've learned there's some locals who will go to
great lengths to establish my Failure. And it's my job to do everything in my power to thwart

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them at every turn and every stop, now that I know they're out there. They'll stop at nothing to
stop me. And I'll stop at nothing to overcome and stop them. AT least I got Viacom off the air. I
think I'll start with Viacom. It was inevitable anyway. Apparently Viacom wants to make up for
shitty broadcasting product by attempting scare tactics on me and the general public, and on top
of that they think they deserve a billion dollars for screwing the public over, and being generally
greedy and evil, for contributing NOTHING, they think that's worth $1 bill apparently. In
Viacom's eyes, screwing You People over is worth all the money in the world. And I'm here to
say fuck that, and fuck them. They're a con-artist. Here's to hoping they'll stay off of Broadcast
television permanently. We should all be so lucky to see an Enron-esque public failure that Epic.
Viacom = Enron.
I function on a healthy diet of OPM (Other People's Money), whether it's a royalty or a
settlement. I'm up for both, quite frankly. I've earned both. I thrive on settlements and royalties.
It's my salary for not having a traditional job.
Apparently no one really can take a direct hit from me in actuality. Viacom gave a good show,
but in the end I killed them too. But they had it coming for a LONG time.

Thursday, July 12th, 2012,

The kind of animation pre-production work I do is strictly speculative. It's all homemade, and
made from good old pencil or pen and paper because that's all I can afford. It's utilitarian
animation. I'm a screenwriter, character designer, conceptual artist, and storyboard artist.
But the thing is, all work I do is hypothetical "spec" or speculative work
I do a fairly large amount of "sword / gun" storyboards. If there's anything that looks cool in
storyboard phase it's a factory shootout or a swordfight.
It's the End of Television As We Know It. And you know what? I feel fine.
TV is Falling Apart. Slowly but surely. The Internet has sent a change into effect that will
Inevitably Kill The Existence of TV as we know it. Meanwhile I played such a big role in the
End of the Idiot Box Legacy that now half of, if not all of the people working in TV want to see
me dead. No sweat. All in a day's work. Best of luck at the whole "survival" thing, Los Angeles.
Welcome to my world. The Fall of Viacom is only the beginning of The End. Other Giants and
Goliaths will collapse as well.

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Saturday, July 14th, 2012,

I love writing. I love it so much! I'm addicted to writing. I love writing so much, and I write so
much that I can't even read everything I've written. There's too much of it. I'm too in love with
the process to be aware of everything I've written. It's like being in love with practicing the
guitar. You sound good in solo performances, but obviously you're not going to remember all the
sounds you've made, other than the obvious.
Counting occupied sketchbook pages and Word Documents, so far, for the first half of July, I've
produced 90 pages of printouts, art, and literature. I'm turning my spare time into a book and
graphic novel. Or illustrated novel. Both sort of.
I've Designed my comic all the way into a much bigger, much weirder dimension, which,
although it's populated by humans, does feel a bit alien.
Now that I have a method of drawing Mono's costume (the Black Flames Technique), I need to
work on making him mobile and lithe from underneath that supernaturally dense costume:
He's got some moves:

Giant leap
Flight
Sword Slash
Sword Thrust
Sword Swipe
Sword Slap
Sword Block
Low Kick
Medium Kick
High Kick
Very High Kick
Head Butt
Fire Blade (Flame Projectile)
Aerial Launch, Aerial Kick
Bob and Weave
Uppercut
Jab
Suckerpunch
Punch
Slap

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Palm Swipe

This is not counting his guns and ammunition.

Sunday, July 15th, 2012,

I'm sick of comics. Comics are TOO popular. Comics are actually mainstream now, and draw
hundreds of thousands of moronic groupies and shallow posers calling themselves fans. I might
never draw professional comics again. When an audience is that big, it's pop music. It's literature
for morons. Same with manga. Now it's worthless. It's for morons. I'm done with comics. It's not
fun anymore now that people like it. I HATE IT!! I FUCKING HATE IT!!!!! Who said I
"wanted" a large audience. What a bunch of idiots. If comic books are the movie and pop culture
status quo, it's officially dead to me. I have no desire to participate in the mainstream. Comics
used to be something I love. Now it's the literary equivalent of the supermodel and fashion
industry. It means NOTHING! I can't relate to the mainstream.
I think I'll try my hand at being a Novelist. At least regular books still have some credibility and
aren't followed by fashion groupies, but instead, old people. I don't mind that.
Comics being mainstreamized is one of the most moronic, stupid, most annoying and idiotic
things I've ever seen. I am so fucking done with that shit. Is that all comics is now? A crowd of
people standing around in a room? Well, if that's all it is now and all it's become, I have no
business even being there. Comics isn't even about art and drawing anymore. It's about a big
frightening crowd of people in a room. If I wanted to be part of something like that I'd go back to
school.
Comic and anime conventions aren't even real conventions anymore. They're rock concerts.
They're Social Gatherings. They're Congregations. Either way, comic conventions have nothing
to do with actual comics anymore. But apparently you're forced to attend them in order to have a
higher standing as a comic book creator, or even to officially be considered part of the industry.
Pretty shitty. Just say No to all that. Not fun. At all. I don't see why anyone would find a comic
book convention fun. It's painful being around that many people. It's like going to a music
concert or football game. And when you're afraid of crowds and noise like I am, that's probably
the last place you want to be.
Places to meet other artists, and put up flyers for discussion or hobby clubs and groups:

Art School
Community College
Crealde (Local School)
Comic Book Shops

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Bookstores
Libraries
Museums
Art Stores

Artists tend to hang out at these places, or at least buy stuff there. I've been to all of those places
at one point or another. Those are all social places where people go, on one level or another.

Are my drawings destined to litter my house for the rest of my life? Or will they ever really take
on a life and a universe of their own, all their own. Those papers in my room with drawings on
them of my characters and world. They're alive in my head. They're alive to me. But are they
alive to anyone else? Are they alive in anyone else's mind, other than Steve Blum, Danielle, and
Lindsey, Katsuhiro Otomo, and Piro? How much work is necessary until your work truly comes
alive, or comes to life in your own mind? Well, in some ways the saga and adventure IS alive in
my head, in my mind. My mind's just crazy enough to imagine them, those things. If there ever
were a mind that received such a vision as though it were a YouTube and Cable TV CN channel,
it would be my mind. And what of Blacksad? Or Darker Than Black? Or Karas? Is the vision
already alive in those studios and producers' minds (and drawing boards and computers and
TVs)? When does a vision become truly alive. Well, I'm the narrator, so I guess I'd better narrate.

Monday, July 16th, 2012,

One hobby of mine that allows me to display my ingenuity and power in action is the hobby and
Art of World-Building. World-Building is one of the most fun things I can think of to do with
my time. I like Designing and Building worlds from scratch, on paper and on computer. It's fun.
Plus it's one outlet for my ingenuity, other than inventing new technology, which I'm also really
good at.
Honestly, though I do admire the skill and technique of Asian Animation, I myself do not believe
in outsourcing my productions to Japan, Korea, or China anymore. They do not fully understand
the nature of my work. Fanart from said countries on certain art sites online has made this
brutally honest to me. An Asian animator or designer isn't any further ahead when dealing with
my designs than an American animator or designer is. May as well keep it local. Things like
Pixar and all the comics I read growing up never outsourced work to Japan or Korea. I want my
art and comics productions to be by me, not a "committee".
There is a certain redundancy to my style, I've finally noticed and realized. My natural sketch
style is this:

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Every week, and every so often, every couple days or day, patterns in my process will emerge,
certain redundancies:
Often I'll get a certain vision, archetype, or shape or form in my
mind, and the rest is history:
I'll end up drawing one or two drawing form, image, or archetype, 2-58 times over and over again, in a series of similar sketches. It's a
duplication thing. I get 1 good image or vision of a sketch in my
head, establish an archetype, then duplicate it on paper or the page a
handful of times. Doing so hurts my arm and takes a lot of strength
and energy, and I can literally feel the applied intensity and
pressure of squeezing out a page of art and design. I literally feel a
lot of pressure in my body whenever this manifestation and conversion
from mind to manifestation happens. I poop out a masterwork, a
masterful sketch or thumbnail of a storyboard or comics image, and
suddenly from that completed moment on I have beautiful and rough art
to reflect on and add it to my art poop pile.

I also sent an email to Michael Garrett today, hoping for some advice. Who's that, you ask? He is
and was Stephen King's first professional editor. I'm considering getting a manuscript critique
from him if he's interested. Depends on if he emails me back. The critique would cost money,
but it would be money well spent, as editing early Stephen King literature is credibility enough.
A Readership of 20,000 readers in 100 Countries Worldwide is going to be seeing my Parallax
Poster Print Advertisement. It's smack dab in the middle of the issue (!), right next to the Black
Dynamite article
Damn, I'm starting to feel like Jean-Paul Sartre. So full of pretension and loftiness, yet so not and
full of prolific ingenuity. Being and Nothingness, one of my favorite philosophy books of all
time, while it could be considered pretentious, in reality it's speaking its own brand of alien
language, which makes sense primarily to other geniuses. Being-in-Itself, Being-for-Itself. An
Ontological Essay on Phenomenology. What if Jean-Paul Sartre wrote a Understanding Comicslike Graphic Novel that told a narrative, which was illustrated by Fellow French Genius Eugene
Delacroix. That's kind of what a lot of modern Franco-Belgian comics are, or at least the ones I
buy online.
This trade publication limelight is gonna take some getting used to. I've never felt
this...something. It feels like I can do anything I want. And I did. I already drew some comics.
I've done about 7 actual coherent comic book pages at this point, out of around 120. I think I can
do better. It's taken a while, but I'm starting to do more than just 2 to 3 panel long stories at a
time. I'm going to gradually ease into doing longer stories. You can do a lot with brick walls and
arches in terms of comic book panels.

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Yeah, I'm a sensitive soul. Not the best at dealing with criticism. As a matter off fact, say the
wrong thing to me, and there's a high likelihood that I'll never, EVER speak to you again. I can
think of a few names I'm doing that to right now, This Very Moment.
Yes, I'm featured in a new issue of Animation Magazine (Regular Show and Ice Age are on this
month's cover) for the first time in my life, and I got that issue in the mail today, but achieving
such a thing took a lot out of me. It took a lot of work, a lot of time was spent on my behalf
doing production for that advertisement. Now I'm just kind of worn out. It's been thrilling but
exhausting competing in the contest (and a little nerve wracking, but fortunately I know how to
keep my cool when I'm doing something with my time lately that's a big deal). For the first time
in my life, I'm achieving something major, and I feel closure, but I'm not compelled to brag
about it to the nearest person. This is bigger than just me, and I think that's part of the reason I'm
not feeling a burning desire to show it off. I don't need to show off. The result speaks for itself.
There was a time in my life (probably around 1999 and a few years beyond) that I felt really
insecure about myself and my life, so I would compensate by bragging. I'd brag to my journal,
I'd brag to my web accounts, and I'd brag to my friends and family. But I only talked to my
friends and family that way because it was the opposite of how I felt about myself. I bragged
BECAUSE I was insecure, not because I was confident. And people in the public domain
mistook me for someone who actually was that arrogant. Glad I'm past that phase of my life. The
bragging phase.
Looking at and window shopping for books on Amazon that teach you how to draw comics is a
poor substitute for doing the work. One page of comics art is worth 10 books that supposedly
teach you how to do such a thing, but that really only deliver on theory, not performance. In
comics, books are a poor substitute for drawing/doing. Just do it. Do the comics work. It will feel
very rewarding.
Truth is, one could write numerous books on the art of the start in comic book page drawing.
Sure, you've got to create a page and take it one to four panels at a time, even for long stories,
but there's a lot more to it than that. That's the problem with books that teach how to draw
comics. Truthfully, if you have what it takes to draw 1 finished or sketched and roughed out
page, you have the potential to draw a lot more than that. One could author NUMEROUS
books on the hazardous challenge of comics book fatigue and inertia. Truth is, getting
experience in comics is one of the easiest things in the world, if you're approaching it the right
way, meaning you're actually bothering to make the EFFORT to build and design some pages.
The fastest way to get ahead of the rest of the industry is to stop
talking sh*t like the rest of the industry, and actually make the
effort. Even if you're just trying to draw comics by making the effort
of putting pen or pencil to paper, the fact that you're pencil or pen
is connecting with paper, that puts you ahead of 60% of everything
else. You're number one weapon for battling competition IS the process
of drawing new comic book pages. Opening a BOOK on comics making isn't

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making comics. The only way to survive in comics is through the
attainment of pencil mileage. How to gain such experience is easier
than it sounds, assuming you don't make a big deal about it and waste
your time accumulating much ado about nothing.
The truth is, diving in, gaining pencil mileage and experience through
doing bad and sloppy panel work and full composition thumbnail layouts
and sketches on plain old paper is scary to most artists. Taking
action scares most artists. It's much safer to be lazy and remain
frozen and inert. There's a whole MARKET for pandering to timid and
lazy artists who don't want to invest in taking action. Playing to the
fantasy of "secret techniques and strategies" as if such a thing
exists in comics. There's no correct way to draw comics. A panel is a
panel, no matter how weak, crappy, sloppy, childish, and simple. If
you're drawing comics, you're a comic book artist. If you draw panels with

anything in them, you're a cartoonist or manga-ka. Take your pick. There's plenty of room at the
top, primarily because for the most part, no one is actually taking any real tangible sort of
painstaking or concentrated effort to get there. What's so hard to understand that doing is so
important that if you START DOING and START PRACTICING MAKING COMICS PAGES
WITH REAL PANELS,
most.

you're already closing in on your goal more than

Tuesday, July 17th, 2012,

My Book-Zine is now 100 pages long. Half of the book is full now.
Bibliography:
1. Book-Zine
2. Animation Magazine Ad for Parallax
3. END TIMES
4. MANIFESTO VOLUME I
5. MANIFESTO VOLUME II
6. COMMENTARY
7. Art Manifested (Artbook)
8. Variety Hour
9. The Phantom, The Voice, and the Phone
10. Shadow Walker
11. December Waits
12. The Essays: A collection
13. Parallax Pilot Script

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Normally, I'd say I'm doing something wrong. But this round, I'm not doing anything wrong. I'm
doing all the right things. I'm not doing anything wrong, I'm just not doing anything that would
win a lot of praise either. Oh well. I'll survive. I'm doing a great job!
Things I emphasize too much:

Phonebook length books

Matching the Masters
"Deadlines and Due Dates"

Wednesday, July 18th, 2012,

I wonder why I'm not obsessed with power like I was at one point. Probably because I've already
peaked, and this is about as close to powerful as I'm ever going to get.
My anime knowledge ain't what it used to be. With the rise of Asian-America, and the declining
number of new anime titles that perk my interest, I've fallen behind in anime in the last few
years. I am no longer an anime genius. I think I've found a new passion in old books and novels,
and my old collection of independent comic books and my old/new collection of music. But I'm
still an American animation superfan, which is worth considerably less in terms of market value.
I'll always be far out in front of everyone on the cutting edge. I'll always be on the cutting edge
of some field, whether it's the cerebral, the scientific, the technological, the artistic and creative,
or the avant-garde, or all six.
Follow-Through
Just because I have an intention to do something in this journal, or
just because I have the will power to try to make a plan around it by
writing it down, never results in my plan actually happening. Just
because I think of myself wanting to do something (in written form)
here in this journal does not vindicate, guarantee, or reward me with
the strength to go through with drawing everyday, and does not bestow
me with the power to get off my ass and draw every day. So I need to
stop thinking that just because I have the "willpower to write a plan
for doing it down" automatically guarantees an sort of reward in the
form of following through. This isn't a flaw. It's human nature. It's
the obstacle of human nature. Just because we will or think or talk or
write about doing something every day, consistently, and often for an
hour a day like drawing, doesn't automatically guarantee it's going to
happen, whether it's on the same day I wrote my intention to draw and
sketch comics, or a time lapse of 5-10 years later.

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I've never believed in phantoms, hauntings, apparitions, and ghosts or the undead in any form.
But it is a recurring theme in my fiction. A lot of it seems to have a "bleak haunted vibe" to it.
That's just my style. I enjoy writing about ghosts. But not JUST ghosts. I'm a skeptic who enjoys
taking time out of his day to write stories about the supernatural. I've been that way since middle
school or so.
I'm a bit of a cyber-vigilante, (see Arab Spring in Egypt, and Bryan's temporary arrest for
murdering his friend). Not continually, but sometimes I have been known to deliver justice when
called for.
From Follow-Through Book:

Instinct
Instinct-Based Guidance System

It's true. I am in a slump. Lately, I've been lounging around my house, reading books I own for
hours all day, and drinking through bad TV at 4 p.m., then drinking some more, right before I
take my sleeping pills at night. I might never get the chance to leave and get out of this slump.
Financially speaking, that's a very likely possibility. My will power, workaholic nature, and
discipline certainly aren't going to make things any easier. So I've decided to use my parents
tactic. Make the best of what I got. Learn to accept and enjoy the present, cuz that's pretty much
all I have now, and as long as living this way is relaxing and comfortable, it may be like being in
a waking coma, but I'll take that instead of real failure anyday. That follow through book
has liberated me to not feel such emptiness and guilt at the thought
of Not Following Through. That isn't my fault, and now that I realize
it, it's a load off my shoulders. I don't have any character flaws.
I'm just not built that way. And to build habits like that, it's going
to be a grueling next 10 years of painful practice. But I'll learn to
accept it. I'll just read books with a stopwatch to pass all the other
formerly-unbearable time.

Ahhhh.
Acceptance. Live With It, Y'all.

I drew 8 pages of mostly portraits today. That was today's series and the theme of my sketching
for today. In the last 2 DAYS, I've read around 85 pages of various chapters from my How-To
Follow Through book, and the other book about Japan. How did I start to read so much? Simple:
I timed myself. I've become time conscious. I find I can do reading and drawing (and maybe
writing fiction as well) for longer if I simply approach them in a Time-Conscious manner, and

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not a Time Unconscious. Also, the "Primitive Guidance System" or "Instinctual Survival
Neurobiological blind spot" is incredibly effective. There are ways to trick ourselves into
thinking our intent is more something we need to survive instead of just something we want to
do, or should do. Turning a Should into a Survival Ingredient, where you don't even think about
what you're doing. Drawing and writing fiction will in time become like eating, or shitting, or
drinking, or reproduction and sex. I'll automatically act on those shoulds, because when you
think it's for survival, you're mind doesn't disregard and disrespect it by questioning it. So says
the "Follow Through" book authors.
Well, I've definitely been applying the book's advice on Follow Through. In terms of reading
books, writing analysis and notes, and drawing, even with a temporary hour or two hour long
power outage) I still managed to burn through 80 pages of reading,
writing, and drawing today. That's 70 pages of books read, and 10
pages of drawing. All three pursuits (Reading, Writing, and Drawing)
pretty much balance each other out.

Current Reading-Writing-Drawing Rate is around 10 to 20 pages an hour. Because it took me 5

to 6 or 7 hours to draw 80 pages in one day.
One of my newer predictions is slowly coming true, and it involves compulsion, discipline, and
willpower, as well as follow through and the victory over procrastination.
A few years, months, I forget which, back, I made a vow to mold my
practice efficiency, discipline, and compulsion for the power of my
art and drawing into something that charted out somewhere and as
something closer to and more similar to my writing practice. But the
part I didn't realize, or left out from my conscious memory of how I
built my writing manuscript empire is that all foundation is built on
other foundations. So for writing, while I may not have had discipline
for my drawing at the time or an instinctual survival mechanism to
drive my writing in the beginning, I absorbed what writing discipline
and willpower I do have now by resting it and housing it on the preexisting foundations of my job and education, or all the school and
work I did have at the time back around the year 2000 to 2001. 9-11 of
2001 helped increase my writing fortitude. If I could keep writing
after that disaster, I could keep writing with the fortitude to
weather any disaster, with a vengeance. My overhyped, over appreciated
artist half has grown to envy and admire the humility, intelligence,
organization, compulsion, discipline of my Journal Writer Half. My
Fiction Writer half also feels that way about the factory-like Journal
writer. They both want in on that action lately. That level of intense
action and efficiency. A lot of my secret for that is I learned the
Basics of diction, English, typing, creativity, and grammar, and it's
resulted in a very solid, fortified foundation for me, that not even I

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or any of my enemies could stop me if they WANTED to. It's easy for
enemies to stop my drawing, or at the very least it was. It's
impossible to stop my journal writing. One's a bona fide compulsion.
The other 2 aren't.
Nevermind Epic Adventures. Anything more than one panel at a time,
followed distantly by 1 page at a time, if it's not a short range
narrative, anything planned to be longer than that is setting yourself
up to fail. You can't afford to focus on more than 1 panel at a time
on each page, which eventual will leave you with a mind-blowing 1 page
comic. Better than nothing!

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Chapter 6

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Saturday, July 21st, 2012,

So now I know what the worst thing that happens when I force myself to draw. I will feel
fatigued and sick. I'll get acid indigestion. But despite that I still got more artwork done.
Around 6 pages this morning so far. And with a little more acid indigestion in the future, I'll
probably do plenty more, too.
When I feel trapped, cornered, persecuted, powerless, stress, and helpless, drawing is now a great
refuge, weapon, and escape to fend away the darkness.
I'm quite glad I am as powerful as I am. Having this level of power is infinitely entertaining. I
can build and destroy at will. Ruling the world is pretty cool. And having power over the
majority of the world and its conversation equals control. I control the conversation. It's always
about me. I designed it to be that way. Or more honestly, others did too, but why complain about
the fact that everything is designed to showcase me? I'm at the center of the world AND
universe. I'm more powerful than Justin Bieber, Charlie Sheen, Barack Obama, and Britney
Spears. If people are comparing those weaklings to me, that must mean I'm more powerful than
every last one of them.
Next Step in my Art Progress Process? Digital drawing. I've found a Wacom Bamboo Connect
Tablet on their website for $80, and thought it might be useful to me, seeing as that way I can get
drawing done and put art directly onto the computer and scan it. That way I'll slowly ease into
being what most artists in comics are now (From Jhonen to Joe Quesada to Todd McFarlane to
Kishimoto). And that would be an artist that's Digitally Based. And I can add digital pen and ink
revision to classic paper based ink work that was all done by hand. Awesome.
Akira, Cerebus, Spawn, and Manga are the comic book Olympics. The Marathons of Comic
Book Creativity. To succeed in this field, it takes mental, emotional, and psychological
preperation, tenacity and perseverance, and the boundless energy of genius. Big Background
images are required, and so are epic fight scenes and well developed characters, as well a decent
panel flow. I can probably start drawing comics panels with my Wacom Bamboo tablet, once I
can actually afford it.
My own success and the power of my own success has affected my health and relationships. As
is to be expected. Translation? I'm ended up alone and fat, both of which are probably the result
of my success.

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Biggest Things I've Built:

YouTube
Arab Spring
Internet
Google
Anime
Manga
Webcomics
Manifesto
Mono Jubei
CN
Adult Swim
Parallax
Mono

If there's one thing I know about television animation, it's that I'm in the process and Journey of
mastering it, the entire American animation medium. I'm one of the most talented, detail-heavy,
and original creators working in the animation community today. One day the animation
historians will say something like that too.
Ramin Zahed, Editor-in-Chief of Animation Magazine called all the people who submitted
shows ideas for review (in the Pitch Party contest) Imaginative. The Editor of Animag said I and
everyone else participating is "imaginative"! Hell yeah! That's a very kind compliment from
someone with considerable influence on animation. I create a World of Pure Imagination. Ha!
That's pretty good.
Yeah, I'll admit it. Everyone, 60% of the animation/comics and television industry's right. I'm a
no good low down jerk. But a no good low down jerk with coverage in the mainstream trade
magazine press. So it's all good. Say and show whatever bad things you want about me (in any
medium you like or choose). I'm STILL on my way.

Monday, July 23rd, 2012

Apparently, everything I say sounds like poetry to other people, especially to women, or so I'm
told.

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Made some lunch for myself, cooked it and everything. For lunch I cooked some buttered toast
and eggs, with coffee on the side.
Couple things on my To-Buy List, 2 months from now:

Porta-Trace
Wacom Tablet, Bamboo Pen and Wacom Tablet
Pinnacle Nonlinear Studio Pro (for editing)
Wireless HDMI TV to Computer connector
Camera (for taking sword photos)
Trenchcoat
Cardboard comic book storage boxes to replace my crappy ones.
Blade of the Immortal, Evangelion, Dark Minds, Soul Saga and Fsc Back Issues/Trades

There really isn't all that much modern day, or even classic American or French Katana art out
there. I'm building an entirely new genre of sword comics on my shoulders. I ain't worried,
though.
Currently, my biggest influences on my sword art would be Frank Frazetta (Conan, Pulp
Literature) and Jean "Moebius" Giraud (The Fifth Element, French Comics, Blade Runner), both
of who were prolific illustrators and comic book cartoonists, and both of whom passed away
rather recently (Moebius in 2012, and Frazetta in 2010). Few people could draw sword wielders
in as pioneering of a way as those two artists could.
Today, I made an artistic technique breakthrough. Apparently all this training myself to just draw
with as much ease as I get from writing in my journal, is paying off! I did a drawing without
even realizing that was what I was doing. That was over 4 to 5 hours ago. I didn't even realize I
was stress drawing until long after the process was over and the image was out of my mind. It
was a therapeutic drawing. I did it to relieve stress, and it took away my stress. It didn't increase
or cause it. I drew a TV screen morphing into a hand with a gun. On some level I was aware of
what I was doing, but like my journal writing is now, I did it without forethought. It was
compulsive and unconscious, which is exactly what I've been going for. Must be all that art
journaling, and Manifesto Analysis Journal Process Hitchhiking I've been doing.

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You know, I've really had a hard time relaxing lately. TV Watching can be stressful if it's not one
of my favorites. I need to learn some:
Relaxation Techniques:

Meditation
Deep Breathing
Self-Hypnosis

Getting your own show on TV? Generally NOT worth confronting the evil fanboy/girl hoard at
Comic-Con for. That's what they don't tell you. They force you to be hazed by the Comic-Con
mob just to have a TV show. Definitely not worth it, in terms of dealing with bullshit. That's one
form of hazing and humiliation (a Comic Con appearance) I'll avoid and not go anywhere near
for as long as it exists. Too many people. Mob = Too Big nowadays. Comic-Con doesn't mix
well with social phobia which is what I've always had. Animation never used to be this
confrontational, where they haze you by forcing you to confront a mob of angry fans at ComicCon. Publishing, Executive Producer = Comic-Con Crowd Hazing. DIY Comics. No one sees it
so you're not forced to do anything. There are advantages to doing things my way. Being at the
top comes at a price. My Ultimate End Game Goal comes at the Price of Embracing something
I've ALWAYS been afraid of: Socializing with irate strangers. When I look at it that way, I'm
perfectly happy staying at the bottom. I'd rather roll around in shit than confront a mob. That's
just too noisy and crazy. Very not Asian.
Any place where someone might recognize me from the internet and anime (stores, fan
gatherings, and especially conventions) is a place where someone could attack and defame me
from the "safety of the crowd" if they recognized me. Being anywhere near any of those places
under my normal identity (i.e. the "famous one") would be deeply unwise.
So it sort of comes down to a choice:

Go through a "industry sponsored crowd hazing" (my worst nightmare involving crowds
that isn't school), and get famous with a paycheck, but always be watched by scary
strangers.
or...

Remain unknown and unloved, and pursue a safer, non-glamorous more natural
profession. Or finish a lot of comic book artwork and never get paid, rewarded, or
acknowledged for it, even if it's epic in length.

The media is trying to discourage and humiliate my parents and brother in an attempt to stop
them from leaving the house. But the thing the media doesn't seem to understand about my
parents is the same techniques people use to attempt to awkwardly and inappropriately embarrass
and humiliate me don't work on my parents. Awkward behavior doesn't make them the least bit

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embarrassed or awkward, no matter how much authority and power the TV or radio show doing
it has. I've decided my parents are unhumiliatable. It's impossible to embarrass and humiliate
them with sexual innuendoes and clones. They've seen the same things I see and aren't at all
flustered by it. They don't think any of it's about me or them. Therefore when authoritarian
figures in the media try to embarrass or humiliate my family and harm us in that way, they seem
unaware of it, whether it's news, a NBC show, a cop show, talk show, stand up comedian,
sitcom, cartoon, or Viacom. They're tactics, the exact same ones confidently used against me fail
to affect my parents in any way. They're unaware such tactics are even going on, on the media's
part. Some kid who saw all that stuff recognized my Dad driving in traffic. He actually spat at
Cary my dad through his car window out of raw hatred. The spit failed to connect with our car
and the kid drove off. Dad didn't even bother to look at him or notice him. My dad even has an
easy time making even the most hostile stranger out in public feel small. He's awesome like that.
Totally unaffected by ineffective Bad PR Moves.

New Things to Learn and Be Aware Of

Discipline
Follow-Through (PGS, Primitive Guidance System)
Patience
Doing The Work
Procrastination
Success
Body Language
Relaxation (Relaxation Technique)
Habitual / Compulsive Behavior
Art Journaling
Self-Confidence
Self-Esteem
Self-Acceptance
Willpower
My parents are forcing me into co-dependency
And now, hypergraphia and graphomania (both of which I have)

It ain't easy having hypergraphia. It's a socially isolating condition. One benefit is it does provide
you with a lot of fodder for future projects. It's a literary muse-on-steroids. It's a form of genius.
The world's most prolific writers of both fiction and nonfiction pretty much all have
hypergraphia: Osamu Tezuka, Katsuhiro Otomo, Moebius (Art Hypergraphia), Dostoyevsky,

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Stephen King, Isaac Asimov, Henry Darger. All of them, dammit! I'd like to say I have
automatic "normal" hypergraphia and art-hypergraphia on top of it, but that'd be a lie. My genius
really only extends to writing, not so much drawing. I've just got a good visual eye. I couldn't
write my way out of the Strebler Incident, even though I sort of wish I could have, and I couldn't
write my way out from under the explosive crosshairs of a little "expose" Bad PR. So as I've
already learned, being a hyper linguistic man with hypergraphic genius has its share of
drawbacks.
Story Train: Keep Adding On:
One day on a Yorkshire estate, there lived a man of elder age who fell ill to
cancer. His soul drifted off into the air, but lingered near the estate.

---Why American workers take forever to make animation:

Animation Design Style (general): Simple cartoon, rounded, non-angular
Writing style: Storyboarded, not written. Character centric, more than story-centric
Length: Non-epic
Work Pace: lazy, sloppy, and unenergetic
Detail Level: None
Scheduling: Slow, lazy work rate. Three times as long

Probably the most damaging thing Bryan Johnston did to me, that was a crime in my own eyes
and a serious violation, was undermine my parents once sacred trust in me. As far as I can tell,
my parents like and trust Bryan Johnston more than they like and trust me. That's the best reason
I can think of to explain why my parents hate, fear, and resent me so much. They constantly tell
me how much they hate me and think I'm shit, and how disgusting and useless I am. They tell me
I'm garbage every day of my life. They've made life in this house a torturous antisocial misery.
That is how the cursed venom of Bryan Johnston's fat fucker rage pig venom works. And so has
Andrew, who got himself kicked out.
Why do I even keep writing. I'm starting to think the only reason I keep writing online is so I can
see random people recreate my ideas/words on TV and cartoons.

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I'm placing more emphasis on drawing comics. It's pretty much my only option for telling a
visual narrative. Animation is too competitive, and it's near impossible to get a foothold in that
industry when you don't live near L.A.
So I'll compensate. Because I can't sell or develop my own show, I'll continue developing
Parallax as an illustrative book. The great thing about comics is how much control an auteur has
over them. When making your own comics, you hold the ultimate power over them and how it
ultimately looks on the page and in each panel. With less work being put into my pilot (which
already has a quasi-spec script), more work of that stored work ethic will be dumped on each
individual panel, and I can really build something out of it if I work hard enough and follow my
own page-building instructions enough. The instructions I wrote for myself about how to build a
comic book page will guide me, and keep me from getting too lost in the process. The process of
making comics itself can indeed be labyrinthine. With a few instructions of light guiding me
through the darkness of confusion and ignorance, I just might be able to pull this one off.
Hopefully. It's definitely possible

Friday, July 27th, 2012,

I drew a new comics page today, one of my best yet. It was me trying to approach a page layout
like Osamu Tezuka might, with simplicity, beauty, and cinematically. I think it worked. If I draw
cinematically, like Osamu Tezuka, maybe I can get more pages done that way. And perhaps
they'll look better. Today's composition was a blue jay on a suburban fence next to a house and
road. It was inspired by Osamu Tezuka's experimental film "Jumping", what with the realistic
backgrounds done in an aerial and cartoony style. Turned out great!
One thing I noticed, is that out of the 20 pages of my Best Of comic book work of the last 12
years (2001-2012), 100% of the Best of Comics Pages in my 20-page stack/issue were drawn in
the last 5 years. And 80-90% of them (the vast majority) were drawn in this year alone.
This to me indicates 2 things about my comic book production line:
A. I'm getting faster at comics pages production
B. I'm getting more numerous in how many pages I do
I'm less worried about doing enough work for comics. After all, if I did 16-18 comics pages in
one year (2012) alone, my work rate's only going to increase. Maybe I will do an epic graphic
novel after all. I need to study Tezuka, Dave Sim, and Windsor McCay more. Maybe getting
inside their heads might give me a procedural advantage over other cartoonists.
I'm also considering buying the potential next big thing: A tripod and a camcorder: Bought
specifically for the purpose of making sketching and drawing tutorials for my computer video
files folder. Home movie Drawing Tutorial sounds like a fun idea.

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In drawing comics, I definitely like using aspect angles on big panel pages with establishing
shots. They're good for scenes that take place in cities and neighborhoods (i.e. most scenes in
Tooncoms [i.e. Toon Sitcoms] ). Whether it's people walking past a house, or cars driving by, or
birds and animals enjoying the outdoor sun in their natural suburban habitat. Anything to really
get in there in your book and really establish the mood, or the first establishing shots or first few
establishing shots. The "Bird on a fence" page I did today in July of 2012 is perfect in the fact
that it's very Tezuka-like, in that, though the composition is and opening images are set up
beautifully, narratively, not a lot is happening. And yet even though nothing or "not a lot is
happening", it still feels like a cohesive scene. It feels like cinema. It feels like story. It feels like
cinematic, story-based comics.
For Parallax, the story (much as I hate to admit it) is severely underdeveloped. My taglines feel
like TV Guide or DirecTV episode descriptions more than actual outlines or plots.
Only 2 of my storylines are more fully developed for the most part: "Ex-Marine" and "Druidon".
The rest are severely underdeveloped and need many more notes, plot, dialogue, background,
character biographies, and outlines.
They're called story-arcs. If it were a TV show, each story arc would be an episode, but because
less story gets told in comics than my animation, I can divide my episodes into chapters and slow
the pacing down (see yesterdays journal entry about the Tezuka method I've been using. My 10
or so story arcs can and will have plenty of Tezuka moments and aspect sequences. But the
fighting will be as fast and as elaborate as possible, if possible.
In terms of pacing as it compares between anime and manga, I can't help but constantly refer
back to Katsuhiro Otomo's Akira: The film and comic. The Film was 1 Volume, but the Graphic
Novel (series) is 6 Volumes. The way the world in the anime is drawn mirrors the comic...much
like Dragonball Z did with the DBZ manga. But the pacing always seems a little "off" when the
two mediums of storytelling are compared. Actually, not so much off as just a different structural
approach.
Saturday, July 28th, 2012,
Me: "Dear Psychic Spirit That Possesses me. What nickname will they dub me with in the
future?"
Psychic Spirit: "Hero. They'll call you a 'Hero'."
Me: "Nice!"

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Sunday, July 29th, 2012,

Now that I think about it, secrets are powerful. I've found things to be more powerful when I
DON'T inform my parents of their existence. ANYTHING can be more powerful as long as I
conceal it from them. I've noticed a pattern.
In anime, character design is fun and all, but the real Art Power comes from Layouts, Script,
Storyboards, and especially effects design. It makes psychokinetic abilities all the
more...psychokinetic!
I guess I'm better at drawing Power in Art Form than I initially thought. It's getting easier to
portray Power on a Blank Piece of Paper, my favorite thing in the world (blank paper). I like
blank paper the best because it symbolizes an opportunity to make something up. Something
Original and Powerful.
It's useless considering your self-publishing, publishing, and PR press release, convention, and
interview options UNLESS you already have a first draft of a comics manuscript finished.
It will soon be time for me to survey the manga section of my local bookstore. Maybe. Or I
might just wait until I have enough money to buy some more manga off the shelves.

Monday, July 30th, 2012,

Sometimes I get the novelist's and screenwriter's equivalent of Writer's Block. My journal
writing is never blocked, but my fiction archive writing is blocked all the time.
I'm an independent right now. Meaning I don't really work with a budget, and I have a small
audience. I do indie publishing, comics, art, literature, manga, fiction, broadcasting, and
filmmaking. I'm a bit of an auteur, and the internet's given me quite a bit of international
recognition and credibility.
BookZine Volume/Tome/Chapter I is nearing its final pages, clocking in at 160 pages long,
seeing as the month is almost over.
The cumulative page count for the month of July is around 160 pgs (BookZine) + 25 pgs
(Comics, Scripts, Novels & Fiction) + 30 pages (July Hypergraphia Journals):
Which comes to a total of around 215 pages of output for the month of July, 2012

Unfortunately, the Amazon.com manga bestseller list, at least for the top 5 to 10 slots contains
absolutely nothing new in terms of established content vs. non-established. Everything on the
first ten rankers is presold. It's a pre-existing franchise property of some sort. It's either based on

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a show or based on an anime, or based on a anime based on an old pre-established anime show.
Sailor Moon, Avatar, Bleach, Naruto, One Piece, etc. No new vision or concept is a bestseller
lately the vast majority of the time.
It's okay to daydream and fantasize about animation and animation production in studios in Los
Angeles, and how I'd like to work in one, but as long as that particular obsession doesn't eat into
my drawing time and decrease my comics art output, I'll be able to keep the delinquent balancing
act in check.
Final Goals Training Will Lead Up To:

20-Page Comic Book Issue

22-Page Animation Script
12-Page Short Story
Steps Taken Towards These Goals

Comic Book Issue: 8 Pages of Refined Art (5/10)

Animation Script: 8 Pages Completed (4/10)
8 Pages of Fiction Written (8/10)

That's my 3 Major Products, which will one day be sold probably if I don't give up...

The Comic Book 1-shot

The Animation Pilot Script
The Novel or Short Story

I have an older folder with nothing but one fancy comic book page by Katsuhiro Otomo, one
copy of one page from the Pulp Fiction published screenplay, and lastly, 1 page of a novel, I
don't remember which one. This is an old folder I have somewhere that was originally created to
be at the forefront of my mind, to identify what I'm striving for in my career.

Tuesday, July 31st, 2012,

I'll eventually have to realize I'm not going to earn any more money from Adsense. The $30 I
made from it before was a fluke.

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I don't know if I'll ever master the comic book one-shot, or "one shot issue", but I'm certainly
putting a lot of effort into it. I've been drawing and writing published comic book one-shots for
the last 5 years. I've earned no money from this. I initially handed out one shot issues for free at
the local comic book shops near my house. I think if I continue in that effort, I'll only keep going
to the one closest to my house. The only one around my house actually. Distribution is one of
the hardest aspects of self-publishing to master. Now I have 2 options for binding and printing
my self-published work: CreateSpace and Lulu. Both are kind of becoming pretty famous. And
for webcomics, there's Webcomics Nation, which to me is one big digital billboard and PR
Commercial of a website, for my local, self-published and printed work. The color of my
website matches the color of my comics. But honestly, the quality of my draftsmanship can be
pretty lousy sometimes. Certainly not good enough to make anyone, who's not a friend or family
member, buy a copy. It's kind of nice having no rules or quality control though. Even though
when I'm not restricted I often suck, at least I'm having fun with it.
Webcomics are so confusing. Honestly, I have no clue how to use stuff like Smack Jeeves and
Wordpress / Comicpress. That shit's confusing. I just want to draw. I don't really want to run a
website if I don't have to. I think I'll just stick to traditional print publishing, continuing to self
publish in hopes that a normal publisher or agent will one day pick me up.
Things I want to do: Draw, Write, Print, and Bind.
Things I'm not interested in: Selling, Distributing, Promoting.
Drawing comics is "hard work" as 40 different comic book websites say. It's "Not easy", it's
"hard work", it's "hard", it's "difficult", it's "painful", it's "torturous", it's "real work", it's "labor",
it's "stressful", it's "exhausting", it's "manual labor". A lot of people want to do comics because
they think it's less work than bagging groceries. It only seems that way. It's just as painful and
strenuous.

Wednesday, August1st, 2012,

Okay, I've now gotten around to drafting up some tutorials that essentially fill in the blanks on
improving and documenting my panel and sequential art drafting and digital editing process.
Thumbnails and sketchbooks can be in pencil, but if I'm going to need to draw the art in pens
sharpies and ink. Makes for a cleaner black-and-white scanning process. My scanned pencil art
tends to look really shitty, Especially in comic book page layouts that I scan and print. In terms
of my art, I need to think more of how does the final scanned and printed image look once it's
produced out of the printer. I don't think I'm going to do any grayscale or half-grayscale comics
pages or sequential art anymore, even ones that art cut-and-pasted digitally in Manga Studio. If
it's comics and it's digital, it NEEDS TO be pen and ink.

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One of the biggest ways I sabotage my drawing process, is when I'm not feeling inspired and yet
I still try to create from a vacuum. That's one of the mistakes I've made: Not having handy dandy
regular old comic book issues out from my collection to study for panel-page proportions and
compositions. Pretty much any old comic will do.
BookZine Volume II started this month, and I started off today by drawing 5-6 comic book pages
in my spare time on spec.
That's pretty good, because normally, in the last ten years I never would have done so many
comics in one day. It used to take me 8 months to do 5 comic book pages, but now that I'm
cooling off those angry and hateful flames of mine, I'm able to get ahead in my work. But I guess
my chi power energy had a pretty good flow today. Well, actually, I did 6-7 page today, but I
disqualified one of them, and through the other individual page away after my Dad disrupted my
otherwise unnoticeable process. The chi energy of the one page was messed up by my Dad's
interruption of a positive comment, so I just said screw it and threw the page away. I didn't want
to keep the page with its negative chi energy and let it disrupt my other pages and the process I
went through to get to that level.
Comics and the Late Night
Comics Missing Link
It's 11:39 at night. Late, and most of the house is black and dark. My blankets and TV keep
beaconing me, calling for me rest in them. But the Siren Sounds of my creative muse have kept
calling to me in the dark too. They want me to get up, walk around the house, and keep looking
for The Key. The Magical Key, some book, some comic, some name of some famous creator that
I can merely look at and find and have a breakthrough in my own work just by observing.
Something mystical and magical that as soon as it inspires me I'll begin drawing one sequential
art and comic page after another, and put the finishing pieces on my Graphic novel, even though
in reality it's only just starting. But my muse makes me restless at this time of night. The truth is
there is no secret magic sequential art artifact that can unlock the door to my career like a magic
key. It's just restlessness. The perfect graphic novel doesn't exist. Not even Akira will solve all
my problems, and that's one of the most problem solving comics I know. So I'll settle for another
paragraph written in this journal late at night.

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Thursday, August 2nd, 2012,

It's hard for me to believe, but I seem to actually finally be improving at drawing comics.
Gradually, slowly, but surely, I am improving, one step and one day and month at a time. I'm
gradually but compulsively coming to improve, using larger drawings, with more detail, more
perspective, better compositions, more reference material, and using a larger amount of emotions
in my pages. Blade of the Immortal is pretty useful in this sense. I'm learning a lot about how to
make successful comics pages from Blade of the Immortal.
Certain parts of my pages, certain panels are actually starting to look...professional. I never
thought I'd see that day.
I'm making particularly great strides in the fields of women's portraiture, perspective, and birds,
as all seem to be showing up in my panels. It's not a conscious thing. For the most part I'm not
forcing it. It just flows from my pens, markers, and pencils. It just is.
Ever since the house has been repeatedly empty, I've been drawing like crazy.

"How To" Be Lame

Most teachers and how to books are pretty lame, and are only good for learning the basics, not
innovating and pioneering in your field. "Just Do It, Do the Work" beats "How To" any day of
the week! You reach a point in your career where there's no excuse for Not working.
Sometimes I wish someone gave a shit about me or what happens to me. My parents don't.
At the beginning, I wanted to achieve the fame for quality of a Otomo or McFarlane. But
unfortunately until only just recently I could barely even manage to squeeze a Jack Kirby or John
Buscema out of my brain, onto the page. It's taken a lot of failed drawings to reach this level,
something closer to an Otomo or Hiroaki Samura.
It was a lot of fun being able to say for a little while I'm related to a famous historic figure, and
one of the most powerful British and French Monarchs of all time. That is, it was fun until
people started realizing I wasn't making it up.
Also, when your ENEMIES in the MEDIA become aware of your international prestige and
fame you're kind of born into by blood, suddenly fame" isn't such a fun thing to have.
The most likely candidate for that sort of thing though, was never aware of such facts though.
For as far as I'm aware, Bryan Johnston TRIED to look up my mysterious biological family, but
certain things even he was never aware of. Like the Monarchy thing. The Blue Blood thing. I'm
sure he'd have found some way to try to manipulate it out of my favor if he was aware of it. And

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yet he never did. He's got nothing on me in terms of my internationally hierarchical and ethnic
heritage.

Friday, August 3rd, 2012,

I want desperately to retire from art. I've lost my inspiration and drive. But my art's been the only
escape I've had from my horrible, horrible life.
I wouldn't live here if I had money. I wouldn't live anywhere near Florida if I had money.

I don't know why some people think I'm so good at drawing comics. I'm just as insecure and I've
got just as many bad drawings and wasted days in me as any other struggling "Master" artist.
I have 2 days of waiting to go until my Adsense account activates on my YouTube channel
again. So by Sunday or Monday at the latest it should be up and running.
My current hobbies include:

Finding new or old ways to make money with Google and video
Watching digital videos online
Watching digital episodes on my hardrive
Ripping my DVD collection to my hard drive, in its entirety. I want to go all digital
Working on furthering my comic book career
Blogging
Tweeting
Watching Roku, Netlix, Amazon on Demand, and Hulu
Watching cable TV animation

-----Things that are affecting my line of work:

The Economic Depression

The depression of my family and Florida
The weak cheer from the current generation of people my age or younger
Mental Health and Hygiene
My manuscript progress (not dead, but slowed down)
My drawing chops

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Cockamamy Artificial intelligence Hollywood L.A. Hacking Theories:

First up: Real time visual mimicry, plagiarism, intelligence gathering and A.I.
The Bullshit Autocopycat TV machine, How it's AI Works

You click on a website with your computer.

Using the Trojan they've planted on your computer, the TV Networks A.I. goes into
action
The virus of the TV network goes into record mode and records the visual data of your
PC Screen. It stores the data.
The AI Algorithm quickly goes to work making an auto-knockoff of the thing that was on
your computer screen.
The image that WAS on your computer screen is now in the TV networks algorithmic
system.
5 minutes later a differing yet distinctly similar composition or actor profile plays in
some mindlessly automated brainless and annoying TV commercial that wasn't even hand
selected, but instead autoselected by a soulless computer hidden away in the TV studio.
This applies to spoken words, written words, and general visual stimuli. Anything that
shows up on your monitor is quickly duplicated.

Saturday, August 4th, 2012,

I'm actually quite well versed in the Mystical Arts. I know a lot of the terminology, just like I
know a lot of computer science language.

God, Spirit, Soul, Reincarnation, Manifestation, Transcendence, Death, Life, Rebirth,

Buddha, Refuge Prayer, Dharma, Sangha, Monk, Nun, Church, Mystical, Karma,
Ascendance, Holy Ghost, Paranormal, Devil, Satan, Antichrist, Curse, Mojo, Luck, Good
Luck, Bad Luck, Evil Eye, Empath, Empathic, Indigo Child, Patience, Unconditional
Love, Compassion, Selflessness, Egoless, Brahman, Nirvana, Enlightenment, Meditation,
Transcendental Meditation, The Bible, The Tao, Chi, Chi Energy, Ki, Qi, Shinto,
Shintoism, Temple, Prayer, Psychic, Satanism, Judaism, Kabbalah, Precognition, Remote
Viewing, Numerology, Horoscopes, Zodiac, Zodiac Sign, Premonition, Chi Ball, Aura
Reading, Aura, Patience, Discipline, Visionary, Shaman, Shamanism.

I'll know I'm writing and drawing crap if I ever end up on a manga bestseller list, which I won't.
My manuscripts (thin and fat) are staying right here in my house. They're not going anywhere.
And there will continue to only be one or two copies of each of them. I'm happy with this,
surprisingly.

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Monday, August 6th, 2012,

Finally, I paid off the huge financial debt I owed to my parents. And now we're paid up. At one
point I owed them $1,200.00. Now my debt is repaid. Now I can go back to buying Burger King
Whoppers and Anime Legends DVD Box Sets and French Tomes and books from Amazon and
Japanese art books, and all that other good shit!
It's impossible or well past near impossible to ever "make a living as an independent comic book
artist. There's only 3 artists who have ever do that and draw indie comics for a living: the Scott
Pilgrim guy, Faith Erin Hicks, and Jhonen Vasquez. Indie comics don't sell out like manga and
and superheroes do. It sucks, but this is the status quo. Trying to make a living off of indie
comics alone, with no back up writing or art career is pointless. Screenwriting and Fiction
Writing, as well as storyboarding and art direction in animation pay the bills. Well, that and
teaching freelance.
My friends are comedians and slackers. My birth father and his ancestry are international sacred
nobility. My brother is a tough guy warrior and fighter. My adoptive father is a white collar
worker. My adoptive mother is an innocent and naive housewife. They're all so very different,
and have all left such a strong impression on me.
I do know one thing though. It's time for maturity. Time to grow up, and accept myself as
integrating into adulthood. Time to stop viewing every other thing as either a tragedy or a joke.
Time to accept a more majestic personality and take live a bit more seriously. Conduct myself
with dignity. Not ignorance.
I'm starting to get a reading on the biorhythm of my power and energy readings. I'm most
powerful during the early afternoon, and when the sun is out, not when the sun goes down and
it's nighttime or raining. My power to draw and write is only active and only activates during the
middle of the day, or "midday". Evenings, mornings, and overnight are for watching TV and
resting. For now.

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Chapter 7

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Thursday, August 9th, 2012,
Unfortunately, the world is a douchebag. And the more you "push" the douchebag, the more the douche
pushes you back.
On the Negative: Damn, the internet seems to be putting up some kind of huge force field resistance front
to distract me from actually getting any work done. Whether it's a bad TV show or some lame-o nobody
troll online. It's obvious they all want to distract me so I won't make any progress on my manuscript
rough drafts. Not going to fall for it. I already have plenty of stuff I got done today.
On the Plus: The Writing, it goes well. I'm not producing a lot of words, but I have the story pretty much
mapped out by now, so I don't have to keep stumbling across my notes.
In terms of writing scriptage, turning each individual scene in one episode/fiction into a Word or Celtx
document is pretty much the only way to write. I'm not really going to make my writing process public.
Writing my writing process down or documenting it in any way is just an easier way for me to test the
writing waters.
Whether I'll end up a novelist, a screenwriter, or a cartoonist [or all three] has yet to be decided. Everyone
else will know which of these I really am a few years from now, right around the same time I will. It's
whatever I finish first. But I do a lot of multi tasking so it's hard to lay out a definitive plan, much as I'd
like to.
Time for a Victory Dance Song:
I wrote the Book Outline!
I wrote the Script!
And I drew the Comic Book!

I'm producing scripts, comics, and fiction prose.

I'm working on an animated series pilot, a manga-comic-book series, and a novel simultaneously.
I like to move back and forth between each medium and project with each passing day

Parallax: The Animated Series (in production)

Lee Wonders: Adventurer, A Novel (being written)
End Times: The Comic (being constructed structurally)

On Hold:

Dream Lords (Novel, Feature Film)

In the Realm of the Heavens (Novel, Feature Film)
Yazurai (TV Animation, Comic)
Oliver-E: Quantum Sorcerer (Comic, Animated Series)

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End Times: The Novel, Mono Jubei (Fantasy Novel)

Getting TV shows and movies made can be hard

Writing Scripts and Novels and the occasional teleplay is considerably easier
Do I want to a film or TV auteur?
Or do I want to be a regular literary auteur?

Disney XD (Tron: Uprising, Motorcity), and Viz (Toshin and Neon Alley), are all cool if you like
spotting blacks, black and white artwork. They're an entire flood of Stylish black pen and ink, or digital
pen and ink. Finally, the world is catching onto the vision. And the real cool part is I hardly had anything
to do with them, other than my initial design work online, which more companies (like Viz and Disney
actually finally seem to be picking up on. At first it was Adult Swim (Big O, Metalocalypse), Manga
Entertainment (Karas, Strait Jacket), Bandai (Sword of the Stranger). They also made the movie by
CLAMP that started much of this: X/1999), French comics (Blacksad) and animation (Renaissance,
Oban), Chinese Comics (I forget the names, but the guy has a badass longcoat), and Tokyopop (Priest).
It's about time the Japanese and French realized just how crafty they are with black ink pens and digital
black and white pen and ink

Friday, August 10th, 2012,

So I swiped my brother's copy of Rosetta Stone he was attempting to learn for the job he was trying to
get, and I took the first Spanish test. I got 76 out of 120 test parts right on the first try. Pretty darn good.
Getting a good score on Rosetta Stone and slowly, eventually becoming bilingual left my hyperlexic mind
hungry for more learning. So I decided to take it up to the next level, and downloaded a free trial
dashboard for Japanese and French language courses in the Rocket Language Learning website. There's
also the Pimsleur Language Japanese audio CD series I own, which was kind of my first successful
exposure to the whole bilingual thing.
I'm actually being pretty ambitious in my bilingual education plan, seeing as I'm learning Spanish,
Japanese, and French simultaneously, all at the same time. I'm not learning a lot. But this is how I learned
English to begin with and became hyperlexic at English. I learned letters first, then simple individual
words, then sentences, then paragraphs, then writing, then longer more complex words. And I built up my
English word by word, sentence by sentence, until I was able to write a million words worth of writing
over a 10 to 12 year period in my late adolescence and early adulthood. French, Japanese, and Spanish
can be that love of language and linguistic learning all over again. I've already mastered English and the
English language system. I figured I could try to better myself at a few more, starting off simply, with
words phrases, and sentences, then writing, then paragraphs, then complex pages and phrases. Just built
my system of bilingual linguistics up to something that goes beyond just one language.

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Saturday, August 11th, 2012
Now that I can draw anime, I have to ask myself, what kind of anime and manga do I want to draw as a
style-centric American manga-ka? I've got the anatomy and costumes down. What about the backgrounds
and colors and compositions.
I understand all the manga-ka fundamentals, so I really just need to keep it up.
And I'm both physically and mentally strong, and focused, which can be applied to my manga.
Drawing anime and manga in comics and sketchbook form ended up being a lot easier to get good at than
I anticipated or expected. Drawing manga if you're good at it is painless and easy. There's nothing wrong
with drawing at a Thomas Romain or Marathon Animation level.
Yes, Mono is an interesting, appealing looking character. He's now lived up to my expectations. Not the
easiest thing to do. But shouldn't I considering investing in the designs of more than just one character?
No animation or comic series is made on one character alone that isn't an experimental one-shot.
Ultimately, I'm hoping to achieve more variety in my character designs, not just drawing style. Well, I am
studying the downloads of anime model sheets I found online. That should definitely help. I can always
do copy renditions of characters already out there until I get the hang of it. That's pretty much how it
goes.
I'm really starting to hate how introspective I sounded in my early manifesto journals. I sounded so
selfish. Like some kind of selfish, self-absorbed narcissist. I'll have to edit that down to size...sooner or
later. I mean, I know I was insecure and everything at the time, but there gets to be a point when Enough
is Enough. Enough about you, Joe. Let's hear you talk about something other than yourself. Like your
concepts, ideas, and imaginative and visionary visions. Enough with the existentialism and ontological
phenomenology already. How about actually starting to build your ideal fictional world, instead of
reflecting on "the importance of me".
New Samurai Chanbara Comic
I'm considering doing a new comic. I call it a "Chanbara Wanderer
Comic". It would be my own attempt at a Chanbara manga. It's title
might be something like "Journey of the Samurai" or "Journey of the
Wandering Samurai". Told in a style that is simultaneously Japanese
and something of my own creation, inspired by the likes of Blade of
the Immortal, Rurouni Kenshin, Lone Wolf and Cub, Samurai Jack, Usagi
Yojimbo, and Samurai Champloo. A philosophical-minded samurai travels
across the old Japanese and Edo country side in Rural Japan centuries
ago, and encounters allies and enemies (the latter of which he's
forced to duel with, never being defeated) along the way, never quite
knowing where he's headed to, but always having something of the
Bushido-philosophical variety to say. Sounds like fun. Maybe it could
be one of Mono's previous incarnations. Each Chapter could be a
different Bushido Value, until all the values of Bushido have been
addressed in the narrative. Nameless would be the samurai's name, and

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he'd do battle with rival samurai, ninja, and members of his former
Employer and now-tyrannical Feudal Lord. I see it as more of a comic
book than an animation or script of any sort. The script will be my
creators notes.

I have considered using spies to gather a bit more information about some of my nemeses, small
and big, local and national, in the media and on the internet, find out what they know...About me,
for instance, etc. It's obvious they know some things about me. I'm eager to attain information on
how they got their intel and knew so much about me to begin with (other than hacking and
infiltrating my system with trojans, of course. I'm eager to know just how much research they've
actually done on me. But I've restrained myself. So far anyway. I'd watch myself if I were them
though. I'm not really above that sort of thing, so it's always an opened ended possibility.
Big Book of Folk Heroes:

Yours Truly
Anonymous
YouTube
Titmouse
Uncyclopedia
Abraham Lincoln
Sean Akins
Steve Blum

Yeah, that sounds about right.

[villains list still being compiled]

Sunday, August 12th, 2012,

I think I was 20 when it was the first time I discovered I had superpowers in real life with
creativity and media. But I didn't really know how to control or harness them skillfully. And
even then I could sense other people were incredibly envious of my superpowers. I didn't know if
other people wanted to have my powers, or destroy them.

The 2 most famous 28-year-olds in the world are me, and Mark Zuckerberg. I'm not rich like
him, and I might be less powerful, but I am famous.
Because I'm the inventor and creative brains behind YouTube's content uploading functionality,
and how influential that's made me, I'm the art, literary, media, video, filmmaking, anime, and

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manga version of Mark Zuckerberg. No one questions my power. Or Zuckerberg's. The only one
whose ever really questioned my power is my parents, and they'll always be in violent denial of
my power and fame, purely because it challenges their own power over me. They're not really
qualified judges of that sort of thing.
My allies in business? Adult Swim (PR), CN (PR), Amazon (sales), Google / YouTube (media),
Animation Magazine (press)
Me: "We really need to put the Animation Magazine papers in frames so I can preserve them for
history."
Parent: "We can't afford frames right now."
Me: "And yet you guys can afford food."
Parent: "Food frames. Foods a little more important than the accomplishment and achievements
of your career right now!"
Me: "Gee, 'thanks'. I'll remember that."

I hate power struggles. And yet how many power struggles have I found myself in, purely
because of how powerful I am in reality? I've been in a lot of power struggles, and have been
abused by other people in MANY power struggle, mostly not even of my own making, but
instead instigated by numerous people with something to prove in their open opposition against
me. Fucking sucks. Apparently I'm a threat to society's pre-existing power, because I have a lot
of power too.

Current Stats.

Name: Joseph M. Alberts

Channel Name: SplitAtomBoom
Channel Genre: Film
Gender: M
Location: United States
Occupation: Broadcasting, Publishing
School: Art School, Bachelor of Science. Dropout.
# of Subscribers: 83
# of Views on YouTube: 479,365
# of Views per day (on average): 55

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I'm definitely a filmmaker more than a TV maker. Filmmaking always looks like someone put a
lot of care and thought into it. "Normal" TV is two losers on a backdrop, yacking away. AKA
shit.

Monday, August 13th, 2012,

New Goal: For practice, animated and/or storyboard a 50 frame-panel tai-chi swordfight. I've
gotten the first drawing out of the way. Only 49 more to go.
Secrets of drawing swordfighting: Don't be afraid to make hands and arms in foreground overlap
with sword blade lines in background, or at least that are less in the foreground. It's okay to have
the lines of the blade intersect with the lines of the arm, sleeve, and hand. It looks more
convincing when the swordfight blades are foreshortened from one another and lines of both
fighters intersect. Just like if you draw the action that happens right after the actual impact, it
looks more like anime fighting.
I'm on my 152nd Training Page of Sequential Art. I've got at least 1,000 to 500 pages of bad
comic book art in me. Better to get all those bad pages out now than never.
Man. What I ever do to them. At least no one's trying to kill me currently. I'm so used to having
some stranger I've never heard of before trying to kill me. Whether it's a bad comedian or a
demented journalist-documentarian or a sociopathic copshow, talk show, or sitcom writer. Those
guys are always trying to kill me. Dead serious on this one. How do I get rid of these
cockroaches.

Tuesday, August 14th, 2012,

These days, apparently it's easier to make enemies than friends. Society is full of people who
only seem to want to make enemies, and no actual friends. The bad guys of society don't really
have any friends, and don't seem to want any either, and I find that quite sad and pathetic. Meet
people who make decent friends and colleagues is harder than ever. Really sucks.
Also, there's no point in rotting away in domestic jail the rest of my life. I refuse to be in
Mommy & Daddy infantile house prison for the rest of my life. I'm eventually going to have to
leave Florida, maybe the United States and the South East entirely. Maybe someone, one of my
friends maybe will actually bother to help rescue me from prison and help me do something
with my life. You know, that isn't sitting on a couch in front of a horrible flat screen TV in
prison. Why do I have to be the only family member sentenced to Florida House Prison? What
did I do to deserve this sentence.

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I've drawn 25 decent comic book pages between the first day on the beginning of July, and now,
August 14th. So in 1 1/2 months, I've completed 25 rough amateur comics pages

Wednesday, August 15th, 2012,

From this point on, I'm going to be redrawing older drawings, as I seem to have achieve some
stability in that area. It used to be that whenever I tried to redraw my drawings, they got worse
with every new attempt. Now they're getting better. I guess it came to me with age, or so it
seems. I'll also be copying drawings from published works I see. And DVD pauses.
All they ever let me do is train and practice my art. I have very little personal freedom. I'm not
allowed to live a normal adult life.

Thursday, August 16th, 2012,

So far and currently, I am averaging 60 pages of art a month, not counting all the writing I've
done.
I have two options.
I can waste time legally pursuing the showbusiness folk who base their characters and stories on
me without crediting, notifying, or compensating me fairly for said exchange, or I can do
something that makes an actual difference and continue pursuing my own work, instead of
exposing the illegal nature of the more popular work of others. Both options pay, but only 1
doesn't get bogged down in legal and court jargon. Just because I already have the opportunity to
sue certain people in media (which I definitely do) doesn't mean I'm automatically going to
pursue such a path. Continuing to lose popularity and money would be a good reason, but I'd
need more data on the situation
Or the "more fair" option:
I can keep working, practicing, and training.
My amnesia was so bad a few years ago, I think not being aware of who I was temporarily made
me more social. I did a lot of talking, and at the time I didn't regret it. Dunno if I regret it now,
but I'm definitely becoming less and less comfortable with being "one of the talkers". Talkers,
also known as people who like to gab away and generally talk too much, ANNOY THE
FUCKING SHIT OUT OF ME. I'd rip their throats out with a butcher knife if I could, just so I
wouldn't have to listen to their annoying voices anymore. I'm glad I'm retaining some of the
silence I produced regularly as a child and teenager. I was not at all talkative as a child or teen
growing up. My friends like to talk. I didn't though. I just like being around them and their

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charisma. I liked to listen to my friends talk. Quite different than hearing myself talk, a sound
I've quickly grown to despise now that I know my true nature is one of contemplation and
silence.
Friday, August 17th, 2012,
Out of all the professions and occupations I'm hoping to make a living at eventually (independent
comics, animation writing, storyboarding, engineering, and being a novelist), being a comics
creator is the one profession that pays the least. Most comic book creators don't even make as
much as $2,000, if that. It's peanuts compared to all the other professions. And yet I find comics
to be the most challenging and rewarding line of work out of all of them. It baffles me.
If succeeding in manga means you have to sell out your own country just to be popular in Japan,
I will gladly remain a Central Floridian Middle Class Foreigner Yank. I'm not a traitor who hates
America like some in the manga community. I don't need Japan just to pursue a higher art. Even
the mere suggestion of such a kooky concept sounds fraudulent and bogus to me. I draw
American comics. I always have. Just not superheroes. I draw longcoats as opposed to capes, and
DBZ powers as opposed to superpowers. The power is still there. It's just a newer kind of power.
Saturday, August 18th, 2012,
One thing I've learned is that in terms of art, I'm not able to be powerful on whim, cue, or
command. My talent for art comes and goes. One day I'll do a really horrible drawing of a thing
or person, the next day I'll do a masterwork of line quality. I'm inconsistent. My drawing ability
is inconsistent. The only way to do more good work is to linger on the page and drafting board. I
can produce art on command, but not always good art.
I need to fret less about what critics think, and worry less about my goal and if I'm able to handle
it or not, and put more faith in my process. Just trust myself, my power, and my process. Take it
easy. Take it on a day by day process, and watch my progress moment by moment, not decade
by decade.
Sunday, August 19th, 2012,
So I'm reading that book, The Power of Presence. In hopes it will help me better manage the
management and awareness of my presence. I have more control over the power of my presence
in important situations than I realize. Almost everyone does. It wasn't until I realize that yes, my
presence is powerful, that I learned and decided I'm going to need to have some control over and
power over it. I have a hard time controlling both the influence and manipulation of both my
presence and power, or chi energy. It's important to be aware of when and where you are, at what
time your there, and what location, not just who you are. My presence contains a lot of imposters
attempting to associate themselves with it through shallow and fake marketing on TV and
computers. I've got to beware those upstarts. Beware the false idols.

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Maybe I should call it a night. I'm not COMPLETELY tired, but it's been a fairly successful
night of tweeting and watching TV, and being retweeted by one famous artist I'm particularly
appreciative of. Plus, now that Adult Swim's repeating through the tooncoms, the Family Guy
and King of the Hill (neither of which I'm into), unless I can stay up to watch Black Dynamite /
ATHF / Squids again, I might turn in and call it a night with Doug and Kenan and Kel on
#90sAreAllThat over at Viacom's Teennick. 90sAreAllThat is kind of like for the same
demographic as Adult Swim.
Monday, August 20th, 2012,
So it turns out I got my own ("unofficial") nom de plum-based Wikipedia page today. Glad
someone decided to write one of those BEFORE I DIED! SO GLAD I got a wikipedia profile
before I died. I was afraid I'd never get one. Terrified actually. Not that there's anything wrong
with that. There's more than 1,000 rather accurate trivia facts about me on that Wiki. It's one of
the longest Wikipedia pages I've ever seen in my life. Is there really that much interesting trivia
about me out there. What's so great about me anyway? But then again, it is Wikipedia, the
Definitive Encyclopedia to all things. I guess they see my value now.
Writers I seem to influence on TV: Seth MacFarlane, Steven Colbert, Dave Willis, Seth
Green, Matthew Senreich, Kris Prynoski, Douglas Goldstein, Brendon Small, LeSean
Thomas, Aaron McGruder, and Roger Ebert. Most of those guys and me have a very funny,
very similar sense of humor. Best TV writing since Mike Judge, Matt Groening, South Park, and
Monty Python. Hmm. How would I describe their and my writing styles: Funny as shit.
Irreverent. Topical at times. Not too serious most of the time. I guess I wasn't aware of how
much my writing seems to actually influence theirs. That is, until I see it on screen. That's
actually very cool! Maybe I should attend Comic Con at some point, or work on a show they
work on some day at some point in time. So apparently I seem to be attracting some seriously
talented friends in not just the art world of animation, but the literary writing community as well.
Especially since I got that Twitter account. It's been a blessing. I get to keep tabs on my favorite
people. Maybe I could work with them some day. It really depends. Who knows. Never say
never I suppose.
Tuesday, August 21st, 2012,
Career Ambitions:

Become a literary figure and famous author

Become a great screenwriter for television and film
Become an Animation and Comics Auteur Creator-Producer
Become one of the Manga, Comics, Science Fiction Fantasy Illustration Greats (i.e.
Moebius)

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I'm okay with sequential art. Actually I'm a pretty bad comic book artist most of the time. But I
am a good illustrator. I'm good with static and individually embellished images.
Wednesday, August 22rd, 2012,
I'm not practicing a style at all really. More like practicing an entire genre I made up myself.
Some form of SF-Fantasy, Sword and Planet, Goth, Crime, and Noir comics all put together and
combined into one. Kind of like how Quentin Tarantino pioneered and built his own genre and
brand of movie singlehandedly with Pulp Fiction and Kill Bill. Builder Builds A Genre.
Also, my philosophy towards artbooks (of which is a business I participate in on some level) is
this. Art books are true art, in a publishing sense and in a design sense. It shouldn't just be about
raw supply and demand. Artbooks should be about aesthetics. NOT JUST BUSINESS. After all,
why even CALL IT an art book if it isn't about the art? That's just stupid.
I have a fair amount of self-confidence now. Considering the circumstances of my life, and how
people EVERYWHERE have treated me in the last decade (horribly, pretty much everywhere),
it's motivated me to develop a higher level of self-confidence, especially as of the last day or
few, when I started reading Building Self-Confidence For Dummies.
From observing myself, even though I've only started developing self-confidence and patience
recently, self confidence has made me fearless in some situations, it's made me less paranoid and
afraid of people, it's made me believe in and respect myself, and rely less on other people to for
motivation and ego-gratification. It's also helped me manage criticism better. I kind of just tune a
lot of it out. In some cases I even enjoy getting criticized. It reminds me how successful and
powerful I am and how pointless it is to even bother listening to critics or even bothering to take
their words (and they ARE JUST WORDS) so seriously. I would call myself a performer, but all
the PR surrounding me has kind of turned me into a performer. I can make some people laugh, or
think, and I get a lot of applause and other types of social approval. When you're famous, you're
always in the spotlight. You're ALWAYS A performer. Does that ever really go away?
Everytime you leave your house, technically, you're performing public speaking. When you're
outdoors, with cities neighborhoods and technology and all that, if you're spied and observed like
I've been you quickly find out driving in traffic, going for walks, riding your bike, just being in
traffic. It's all a big show. Your audience is the people surrounding you. EVERYONE is a
performer whether they like it or not. That's the problem with it. You don't always have a choice
about being a performer. I'm kind a social prisoner. I was forced into the role of media performer
without pay. I'm a mix between Tommy Lee, Dave Willis, Jack Black, and Andy Kaufman. Shy
on the surface, but very bold, stoic, mature, masculine, and brave behind closed doors, in private.
A brash, irreverent, eccentric comedian, a "nerd-pervert" (in anyone but my mother, father, and
friends' eyes, especially TV, radio, and internet). But at least a got a sense of humor about it. At
least nowadays I can smile and laugh about it as much as other people. Truth be told I've just
kind of gotten used to it. I'm ambivalent about wearing glasses and having semi-curly black afro

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hair. I think they've gotten me type casted. I've even considered switching to contact lenses at
some point.
Thursday, August 23rd, 2012,
Notes on Advice from My Elder:
The terms "work" has a lot of different meanings. Work ethic is the way we individually
approach work, the amount of work we do, what we class as work, and the values and principles
we bring to it
People with the best work ethic are doing the job they love, because they love it, and who feel
privileged to be paid for the opportunity. That way work and life merge together and one serves
the other. From what I say, "you seem quite close to that position".
The only person who can properly and accurately judge my output is me and no one else.
Sometimes you can be planning a whole series in your head and it looks to an observer as if you
are sitting doing nothing, so be careful of taking other people's comments too seriously. It's better
you DON'T take their advice too seriously.
As an artist, being a loner is often an advantage. Great art is never done by committee, it is one
person doing what they can. Animation on TV doesn't count as anything artistic, as it's a
committee. Real, Great art is made by individuals, never studios and committees.
How other people are doing in their careers is not relevant to yours. Don't waste your time trying
to be in the same place and time as others at the same rate as theirs. That would be pointless. We
each work at different speeds, rates, rhythms, and paces, some do it early when they are young,
like Mozart, some come slowly and steadily to their best like Churchill as a painter. Just because
Jhonen draws at night is no excuse for you to force yourself to work in the same fashion. Work
in the afternoon and afternoon only if that's your progress rate and what you are used to doing.
It sounds like your project is quite a big one (600 pages of written, pencilled, inked, colored, and
lettered art all by myself of action choreography, character-costume-background-prop design and
atmosphere/dialoguue/description? Yeah), which will take you time to come together (a LOT of
time, probably 2 decades or more). Work on it, work on your project and projects steadily,
persistently, confidently, tenaciously, habitually, compulsively, consistently, and diligently each
and every day if possible or something close to that in your notebooks, manila folders,
sketchpads, computer, and art journal. Do what satisfies you, not what satisfies other people,
your friends, family the media, fans, critics, or anyone/someone else, and one day it will come
together and fit together just like the puzzle and mystery it is. Just the steady, persistent, and
consistent process of working on it (despite all rejection, criticism difficulties and obstacles) will
bring it together. Trust and have faith in your self-confidence, in your own hard work and your

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own building abilities and trust and have faith in your own practice, persistence, and patience
(three P's).
At 28 you are building your career (as a Master Builder 22 Architect INTP INFP multitalented
Scorpio), regardless of whether people see you doing it or not, you are Building the enormous
foundation of your career. Listen to your own heart and intuition most and trust that. Advice or
input from others may or may not be useful. Listen to it and test it against what you know to be
right and true to you. If it is good advice, follow it. If not, say a simple thank you and ignore it.
After all, it is your life, your career, your work, and your project. NOT anyone else. It's NEVER
anyone else's.
If you're not used to listening to the prompting of your own heart spend a few moments each day
sitting quietly, meditating on your thoughts somewhere quiet and undisturbed. Listen to the ideas
that come into your head. With practice you will be able to sort through them into those which
are yours and those passing through.
Friday, August 24th, 2012,
So I heard Jim Philips was hiring. So I sent him an inquiry email last night. That's right. I'm
inquiring about jobs in radio. Real Radio 104.1 to be exact. Maybe working for them wouldn't be
such a bad thing. Most of their shows already are allies of mine. It could potentially be a good fit.
I visited the Chris's house with my Mom while they were away, with their permission to be their
while they were away of course, and I realized something. Chris is the best friend in the world.
They have the best, biggest HOUSE in the world.
Big 30's coming up really soon, in less than 2 years. I'll begin spending my first year as the age
of 30 around November of 2013. That's practically tomorrow.
Things I want to do in my 30s:

Get a job.
Earn Money.
Leave the House.
Get Out and About
Find Some Steady Employment
Find a girlfriend that's not Nicole
Have Sex
Work on my Creative Projects
Move to Another Country/State
Go Back to College or Art School
Go on Vacation

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It's been decided. I need to make things right with my past before I can charge forward into the
International World and Future. I have to find a way to uncover more information about my
Long-Lost Father, Glendis Ralph Sorrell of Ann Arbor, Michigan, even if it takes private
investigators, The FBI "The Freedom of Information Act" (FOIA), and DNA Tests. I'm already
starting to use some of these things. But when I'm done, my father might hopefully not be such a
mystery to me.

Saturday, August 25th, 2012,

I've made the decision. Within the next 4-7 years, if I can and am able to and feel capable of
doing so, which so far I do, I'm considering moving to L.A. That's right, I could very well be
moving all the way from Orlando, Florida on the East Coast to Los Angeles, California on the
West Coast, to study either Experimental or Character animation at CalArts, which my greatest
mentor and father-like figure, Phil Ferretti of MTV and Nickelodeon Animation) once called The
Harvard of Art Schools. Plus, Peter Chung, John Lasseter, Genndy Tartakovsky, and Tim Burton
went there, and you can get a degree there doing nothing but drawing and learning animation
production. That's just awesome. It's the most prestigious art school in the entire world. Quite a
step up from the Art Institute. I've got to give myself a few years to train, practice, work hard,
develop a portfolio, and prepare mentally and physically for my Los Angeles based education. I
would have liked to work for Jim Philips at Real Radio 104.1 in Florida, but apparently he got
hundreds if not thousands of people applying for the job. Shame really.
In other news, I've found some English speaking bookstores in both Paris and Tokyo that sell
books to people ordering from the United States. I found at least 4 seperate Japanese anime art
books for $25 each, which is dirt cheap in anime figures.
Computer is being defective. I hate this new internet connection. Dad signed up with it because
it's cheaper, but it's defective or something. We need the old modem back. I can't go anywhere
online with this crap. Shame.
When my phone works again, I might get to call Phil on the phone.
Other than that, in the next few days I'll visiting a place to buy stuff. And I'm also doing research
on my deceased biological father to see if I can find anything out about him.
So yeah, busy week.

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Sunday, August 26th, 2012

Things they teach you and refine your skills in at CalArts (well, some things).

Character Design (Model Sheets, Props, Anatomy)

Story (Writing, Synopsis, Scene, Dialogue, Description, Development)
Animating
Storyboarding (Production Design, Sequential Art)
Layout (Production Design, Architecture, Perspective, Art Direction, Backgrounds)
Filmmaking (Narrative Storytelling, Visual Storytelling, Illustration)
Animation Reel
Sketchbook
Painting and Color
Sound and Mixing
Editing and Digital Alternation, Addition
Comics, Comic Books, Panels

Elements I'm good at: Costume Design, Character Design, Lighting Design, Concept Design,
Production Design, Series Bible, Writing and Producing Animation, Anime and Manga.
According to many French Wikipedia, the Number Three Animation Geographic Capitals, in
order of historic contemporary and classic importance are:
1.
2.
3.
4.

Japan
The United States
France
China

And also, not a lot of people are aware of this, but by American industry standards, CalArts is
the most prestigious and influential art school in the world. If I can get accepted, it would change
my life. Probably for the better. Being lucky enough to attend the world's most prestigious
modern art school has its advantages. Many of which can help one fine gainful employment in
the long run.
Living The Dream can cause severe anxiety, stress, and fear. Not just happiness, joy, and
pleasure. Living Your Ideal Life is harder than it sounds, and more stressful most of the time.
You may have bragging rights, but that doesn't necessarily you're going to be living on easy
street. If you are going to succeed in art or writing you're generally going to be cranking out
heavy amounts of drawing and writing work and excess and filler material on an hourly and daily
basis, for months and years on end. Succeeding generally means you have to work. My fingers
are already starting to blister from overwork.

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Technically, if I count the work I've done and not the jobs
I don't have yet, I'm a part time

Screenwriter
Novelist
Character Designer
Storyboard Artist
Production Designer
Conceptual Costume and Lighting Designer
Comic Book Creator
Comic Book Artist-Writer
Self-Publisher
Webcomics Creator

I have a fair amount of pages done in most of these

categories, and therefore a fair amount of professional
experience, through just doing it, doing the work and thinking
or writing about it later.
The most logical course of action from here on out would probably just be to keep on doing what
I've been doing. Producing the same work in the same style, at the same pace, if not a little bit
faster and more passionately next time around. I've developed my very own brand of style and
creative process for each of these fields. I understand the fundamentals for the most part, which
has allowed me to innovate and add my unique little quirks to each area.
I should emphasize, I'm not going to patiently wait until I'm either overseas or in college. That
would be a mistake. I need to invest work and work hard Here and Now. Right Here, Right Now.
Like Root Down.
Also, I'm writing this reminder to remind myself to stop announcing work I plan to do, on the
internet, on twitter or in my blog or ANYWHERE online or on this computer or my laptop
before I ever get started on it. Announcements and proclamation need to be for when the work
and project is done. NOT BEFORE. If you talk about things you do before you do them online,
it's sabotage and you're probably cursing yourself and giving yourself bad luck. I don't want bad
luck or competition getting all up in my bag of tricks. Fuck that. But enough about that. No more
of that, no more revealing secret work before it's compiled, published in print, finished in my art
diary, or completed as a whole finished project. That's the smart thing to do. Doing otherwise is a
bad habit that never fails to put me in a bad situation I'd prefer not to be in with rip offs and con
men and frauds trying to bite my style.
People who always feel the need to "announce" "what they ARE doing" or "ARE GOING TO
DO" are strategic morons. Only children and stupid adults do that. They're the most self-

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defeating individuals on the planet. I should know. Been there and done that. Got the tee shirt
that ripped my slogan off.
Monday, August 27th, 2012,
While yes, I am well on my way to living my dream, and have accomplished the goal of
becoming an animation and comics writer and artist, and I seem to have reached the next level in
professionalism, things may seem right and rosey now. But problems and complications will
emerge. They always do. Problems and difficulties always find away, just like life itself.
Favorite Cartoon Characters To Draw Dojinshi of:

Rin
Batman
Spawn
Cerebus
Akira
Star Wars
Manji
Goku
Mickey

The only thing that's going to get me out of my prison cell is the act of working, really, really
hard. Just doing the work and working my ass off. Work truly is the only thing that will save me
from a much more miserable fate. I had to learn that the hard way.
Work is my Lord and Savior. If Jesus were alive today, I'm sure he'd want me to work harder
than everyone else, purely because of how much it helps the world.
Jean "Giraud" Moebius is considered the Pope of Comics, which he is.
If that is so, then Hayao Miyazaki and Katsuhiro Otomo and Osamu Tezuka, what are they?
The Dalai Lama of Comics.
And if I ever go to Asia and Japan, I think I know what I must do. I must go on a journey to see
if I can meet my hero. I don't even know if that's possible, but it's a True Quest. I never thought
I'd have the courage to go on a quest, and yet, here I am.
On Momentum and Discipline:
You know, when the weight and prosperity of the rests on the movement, momentum, and
productivity of your pens and pencils, it suddenly becomes a lot easier to keep that pen moving.

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Literary Works, Current Page Count for 2012:

Manuscript of Scripts, Novels, and Comics: 220 pages
BookZine, Sketcbook, Sketch Diary: 210 pages
Number of Journals finished between January-August 2012: 170
Total Number of Pages Completed in One Year, Between JanuaryAugust/Total for Many Years: 600 Pages!

So that results in 600 pages

Number of Sketchbook Pages: 300
Number of early Parallax Conceptual Art Pages: 400
Number of Pages Printed in Manifesto and Commentary: 2,400 pgs
Number of Unaccounted For Commentaries: 15 Chapters: 300 pages
Total: 4,000 pages of art and writing, both by hand and comp
Between 2002-2012

I'm getting real sick of being lectured by gaijin online. Makes me vomit all the bullshit that gets
spouted about Japan from Americans online who don't even study up on Japan, but instead
pretend they do. There's a lot of false information about Japan out there nowadays. It's confusing
people. Some of this is lies Americans tell about the Japanese. Some of it is lies the Japanese tell
to themselves. It never ends. Oh, look at me! I'm Asian, therefore everything I say about Japan is
always true and never questioned! Bow down bitches! What a bunch of dumbasses.
Wednesday, August 29th, 2012,
There are a few main weaknesses.

That libido
Hygiene
Polished Cleanup Work
Anything That's Not a Gesture Drawing
Painting Digitally and Traditionally
Detail
Focus and Concentration, or Mindfulness

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Laziness
Taking the Easy Route

So, CalArts does have a dept. that will review your art before you go to the trouble of submitting
it to them. That's pretty cool. That seems to be just what I need is an honest critique. A sense of
greater objectivity. Los Angeles is a cultured place. Very different than what I'm used to, but in
an awesome way.
So I'll be traveling a total of 2,500 miles to visit and probably live in Los Angeles. Sounds like
fun. I love traveling. I'm traveling from pure Southeast Coast to pure West Coast.
I called the admissions office, and they'll be sending m a catalogue. The receptionist also referred
me to the email address of an administrator she thought I should contact to get an early critique
of my portfolio through email, by the name of Andrew Ahn, who's a Los Angeles based KoreanAmerican film director who's actually not entirely obscure. He's the one that give early advice
and portfolio critiques for the CalArts Character Animation program. So I suppose I'm making
progress toward my goal if I know all this already.
I also sent Phil Ferretti an email, seeing as I can finally talk to him again as my phone is finally
working.
My parents aren't really involved in my L.A.-based education. They said I need to establish
independence if I'm going to bother attending college, so that's exactly what I will do.
Accomplish schooling, work in, and travel to, L.A. all on my lonesome. I'll be self made. No
rents holding my hand this time around. I'm going there to shut my mouth and learn. No more of
this class superstar nonsense. If I am going to L.A. to attend school, I might socialize a little bit,
but nowhere NEAR the level of talking I did at AiFL. That was all part of the problem the first
time I went to college. This time I'm going to be in L.A. to do a lot of drawing. 2-4 years worth,
studying and producing nothing but comics and animation! I'm looking forward to it. This time
I'm getting a student loan. I'll fill out whatever paperwork I have to, maybe some, maybe a lot.
I'm developing an education strategy. Pretty soon I'm going to need to draft up a list.

Student Aid
Apply
Portfolio
Plane Ticket to port
Andrew
Moving Bags
What stuff to take with me

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Tuition
Room and Board
Student Loans
Employment
Resume
Classes
Travel to Classes
Transportation to CalArts
Transportation to Job
Life on Campus

Literary-Cinematics I'm developing:

Written by Yoshiyuki Tomino and Michael Moorcock

Cartooned by Masamune Shirow
Paced and Narrated by Hiroaki Samura, Osamu Tezuka
Pencilled by Greg Capullo
Ink and Lighting by Todd McFarlane, Yasuhiro Nightow, Jhonen
Vasquez, and Frank Miller
Character Designs by Yoshiyuki Sadamoto, Greg Capullo, Yasuhiro
Nightow, Zelda, Raynart
Storyboarded by Steward Lee, Katsuhiro Otomo, Hiroaki Samura,
Thomas Romain, Bruce W. Timm
Directed by Peter Chung, Katsuhiro Otomo, Thomas Romain

That's what happens when you put NERDS in charge of the internets.
By the end of the next 2 months, I'll have enough money to buy a Samsung Chromebook. I like
how the Chrome web browser works, so I figure, why not make my whole damn computer run
on Chrome. I don't mind one bit. It's around $250. Around 2 months worth of savings.
If I do go back to art and film school, it will be primarily for learning how to run my own
animation studio, meeting new people (maybe coworkers and associate workers), finding people
to work on films with for productions (the animation community, etc.) and to learn about each
individual studio position within the animation hierarchy. I already know the basic ones. The
cool thing about networking in Los Angeles, is that you meet all sorts of people you'd never meet
lounging around your house like I've done in the last 10 years. That's been essentially
meaningless and depressing only getting to interact with parents and psychiatrists for 10 years. It
was a little fucked up. But no one really "needs to know that" but me. That's my business I was a
prisoner to my own house for a decade and was stifled on such a profound level. That kind of
suffering is impossible to convey, so I suck it up and move on. So I was stifled and restricted by
my parents for 10 whole years. So what. Everyone has problems like that.

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Don't trust the internet. It's infected with the cop-show mole virus.
Now that I've explored Justice in an alien world. After that's done, I'm going to pursue its older
brother: Corrupt Justice. I liked Justice in the beginning, until I learned how corrupted the
Judicial Process in the United States is. I don't plan on ignoring that. Justice that Manipulates and
Bullies anything with the balls to block it's path, apprehending innocent people with no real evil
or criminal intent in all objectivity, and how news and politics encourage this corrupt justice
system. That's politics! It's based on my experiences living in Florida, seeing News Propaganda
every morning and night my parents watched and bought into, and seeing crooked cops lurking
everywhere like creatures of the shadows, sort of like evil ninjas.
Wanting your own animation project, if it's any good, nowadays kind of feels to me like wanting
to be an astronaut. There's a lot of powerful elements that could potentially not work in your
favor. Like gravity.
It's hard doing an entire production by yourself. Clint Eastwood and Bill Plympton. They make it
look so easy. I initially chose to do all the production roles on my project, pretty much entirely
because I live in the middle of NOWHERE. Only an insane person lives in a cultural capital and
doesn't work with a staff.

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Chapter 8

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Saturday, September 1st, 2012,

I must find a way to Master My Power. Perhaps by creating a "Masterpiece of Power" a term
initially used by none other than Mr. Toriyama himself!
I don't know how much business, social, and artistic power going back to school will give me
once I finish my education a few years from now. I'm guessing a lot.
Personally, I'm just glad I don't have to lounge around this house and my old room for the rest of
eternity and my life, bored out of my mind with no one to work for or talk to. I'm glad my
destiny has been revealed to not be in the same place my whole life. As long as I work hard,
Work will be my Lord and Savior. Better than Jesus.
What I really want to do with my life is work in comics. But it doesn't pay very well in the
beginning, so for my education and potential employment, I'm going to school on the West Coast
to teach myself how to do animation studio gruntwork. I hate failing at animating, but I may as
well try, and failure will only lead to more success through the experience of having failed to
begin with. Maybe if I'm really lucky I could get a job later on as an animator or director, jobs
that are more integral to production. When first starting off it's important not to rule anything
out. And then there's the student films I keep hearing about. Many animation students (the
serious ones) are required to make them.
Sometimes, you have to risk YOUR WORLD to inherit THE WORLD
Going to Los Angeles to make theatrical and TV animation? That's not so unreasonable. Some
people even expect that.
Going to Los Angeles to make experimental action comic books? That's a bit more unexpected.
New concept for Parallax: The Order of the Black Cloak. A secret society of holy men who are
also experts in the martial arts and self defense. Developed deep in the Tibetan mountains, but
eventually it's influence spread to Central Asia, then Europe, then America and South America
Drew some practice model sheets earlier tonight, of Mono. Rough model sheets, done almost
entirely with mechanical pencil. Model sheets are actually more fun to draw than I remember
them being. I'm improving at both model sheets and storyboards, as well as screenwriting.
I don't really have a career or educational plan currently. I go where the wind and my inspiration
and intuition take me. It may be Los Angeles. It may be France. It may be China or Tokyo. All I
really care about is getting better as an artist. I don't care about who's watching me. I just like the
Adventure of the Journey. As long as I'm still drawing for hours a day, I'm still happy. I learned a
valuable thing from Otomo. Art, if you're a real artist, follows you wherever you go. Work and
talent follow you wherever you go. Never thought I'd turn into Dwight Howard, but...

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I don't really know if I even have an objective currently. Honestly, I just like to draw. I've done
that so far, but I could take it so much further if only I worked a little bit.

All right, now things seem to be speeding up a bit. I'm now on the 11th completed page on the
first draft of my animation pilot script. If I finish this one any time soon, action scenes and all, I
think I'll move on to the other episodes. I'm going to need to finish at least 2 to 3 first drafts of
individual episodes before I can query agents or move to Los Angeles. I'll do something. But
right now I'm just concerned about doing the work.
As an animation writer, I'm influenced more by films such as Ghost in the Shell and writers like
HP Lovecraft and Quentin Tarantino and his Pulp Fiction than I am by any specific animation
writer, this side of Yoshiyuki Tomino.
I'm going to be screenwriting for the rest of my natural life. I'm actually starting to get pretty
good at it. I'm happy about that. That I'm actually good at something.

Wednesday, September 5th, 2012,

Truth be known, Anything bad that someone does to you, (whether they're abusing you,
discouraging, slandering, misrepresenting, belittling, or mocking you) has been done to them
numerous times over. That's why they're mistreating you in the first place. Someone already did
it to them. So if someone's lying about you, trying to make you into a joke or a villain, or
denying you compliments, chances are people have done that exact same behavior to them. It's
already been done to you. That's exactly why you want to annoy and make fun of other people.
You carry a deep resentment over having been annoyed, harassed, or made fun of by someone
else who you could never stand up to. That which has been done to you will probably be
something you attempt to do to me. I'm prepared for it though.
My birth Dad was born on September 22nd, and died around the age of 55 or so, back in 1998.
My Mom is still alive, and by now I've gotten a pretty good sense of how she talks to people.
Because I spoke to her over the phone. I still don't know what either of their faces look like. My
mom doesn't believe I look anything like my father.
Thursday, September 6th, 2012,
So I'm finally reached the level of my educational career where I'm going to get an actual
portfolio critique and review from one of the Admin. at CalArts. I'm incredibly happy about this
new development. Andrew is a working professional, so I'm sure that represents something, at
least for me. Maybe a good omen for the future of my education and career. My first attempt at
secondary education, my EARLY college years, ended in disaster. But I don't plan on making the

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same mistakes. I've got enough time to reflect on what I did right and what I did wrong in Round
1 and 2. Now it's Round 3. The Comeback Round. The Late Bloomer Round. The Round when
I've got a better idea of what kind of situation I'm dealing with and am more prepared. I have
some college experience. But based on all I know about it, CalArts is on the highest level
possible for an art school. They're aware of this and I'm aware of this
I now know at least 3 people who live in L.A. That would be Andrew Ahn, Ramin Zahed, Corey
Jackson (Indigo) & Steven Jay Blum. I think I'll make a lot of friends in Los Angeles and
animation if I go to school there. It's a cultural hub. It would be like going to Disney World every
day. Practically living there within the Magic Kingdom.
For school in Los Angeles, if it does in fact work out, I think I'll go to school to hone my
interests and zero in on a few main specialty areas. Stuff like character design, screenwriting,
layout, and storyboarding. I'll study genres such as franime, noir, anime, manga, and goth, as
well as studio politics, and culture through books, and learn about how TV animation and how
short films are made. I've still got a lot to learn about the politics and aesthetics of Asian Cinema,
but going to school will help with that.
If you want to blend in, you have to find ways to conceal your real power level if it's off the
charts like mine is. End Times, Parallax scripts, YouTube. These are things that can really make
a person stand out and be the center of attention. That's not what you want. You want to blend,
especially if you're in school these days.
Goals for the moderate future:

Move from Central Florida to Los Angeles to attend CalArts to study animation
production
Study film and animation at CalArts
Make new friends at CalArts
Find animation, comics, TV, or Film work in L.A.
Resume work in comic books with End Times: The Series, the printed version
Self Publish my End Times Graphic Novel after I finish my studies at CalArts
Apply my knowledge to running a business and founding a studio
Study art and animation abroad in France and Canada or China
Write a Novel
Write Scripts for The Rest of My Natural Life
Get recurring Work in TV and film (IMDB and Wikipedia Glory await)

Friday, September 7th, 2012,

Mind-Blowing Secrets:

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Steve Blum
Ramin Zahed
Animation Magazine
Pitch Party 2012
CalArts
Andrew A. of CalArts
Amazon
Art - Manifested
Press Release
AnimeTV
Patent
Invention
YouTube

Because I'm part French/Asian/British by blood, I most likely inherited a natural appreciation
and eye for my own cultural heritage, without even being aware of it half the time.
I'm very drawn to the following things:

Asian Martial Arts Filmmaking, Choreography, and Writing

Asian Animation and Animation Design
French Animation and Animation Design
French Illustration, Painting, and Comic Book Literary Tomes
British Fantasy Literature

I have a very folksy outsider approach to these genres, but honestly I seem to have either
inherited or developed a keen eye for such genres. The more people I can meet who produce this
sort of work professionally and recreationally (either locally or worldwide) the better.

Saturday, September 8th, 2012

The Asian-American Film, Cinema, Literary, and Animation Revolution. It's something very
progressive, worldwide, and special.
Asian Cinema, it's the Hollywood of Western Animation in the minds of many American youth
of many races, but especially white for some reason. Anime and the Japanese of the animation
'aughts, are like the Beatles and Brits of Sixties Music. If I were ever involved in any of this
before, I'll be much more actively involved in it in 10 years from now. Things seem to be
looking up for me in a major way.

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The anime industry is prestigious and exclusionary in some ways, and the truth is if you're white
or non-Asian, and you don't live in a city of diversity and only use the internet and aren't out and
about with work and school, honestly, it's just that harder to meet a diverse group of friends if
you're using the internet alone. Traveling, College, Art School, public facilities Conventions, and
Jobs is the Number 1 way to meet and "network" with people from or of just about any overseas
nation or race. That's one reason to go back to school. Some would argue you can meet people
over the internet, but I have yet to meet ONE person I've found on the internet. I've found some
people on the internet who I had previously known, but it's iffy, in the meeting people from
online department, quite frankly, just like meeting people you see on TV is iffy. It can be
disappointing.
Other than animation production projects, I'm also considering maybe someday (if they're
interested), collaborating with my student peers on comic books and online website projects
anonymously on sites like WCN and YouTube. That might be a cool thing to try out in Los
Angeles. Volunteer art and writing related web-ventures for people like me, around me, who like
the internet and want to work with other artists, people, and collaborators on stuff. We can pick
out stuff from our scrapbooks, combine elements (one person writes and storyboards, another
person inks and colors) (One person draws, another person animates and colors) and just be
totally badass, like Image or SLG Comics Jr. or something. THAT...would be awesome. Indie
productions based from a high ranking art school

Sunday, September 9th, 2012,

Things I've learned, so far.
If you're an artist, it's important not to feel entitled to any form of status or success when you're
young, be it money, women, fans, fame, or even respect. Expect rejection, that will be the first
thing you experience when you get ambitious, so you may as well learn to expect it.
I've never really wanted to make any kind of artistic and creative production, unless there was a
way for me to make it on my own terms.
People keep comparing me to Barack Obama and Mark Zuckerberg. 2 of the 10 most powerful
people alive today. Does that mean I'm powerful and influential if people in authority keep
likening me to people who are in power?

Action (Verbs)
Description (Adjectives, Nouns)
Dialogue (Speech)

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I have no family genealogical history. All I have is ingenuity and a desire to learn the
fundamentals of art and film, so that I can refine my skills and tell a great story, a magnum opus,
and maybe make a few dollars on the side. I don't care about money. I won't make any. I just
want to work and finish as many scripts and manuscripts of books and comics as I can. Work on
as many films and TV shows as I can. I think publicity might be a bad idea. I'm not the most
charismatic person. Maybe it's better if I DON'T have control over the length and endurance of
my comics and animation. Most artists can't predict how many pages they're going to do. Only
people like Dave Sim have the physical power to control something lie book length. I don't have
that kind of power. It will depend on what my employers ask of me. I was all about tossing out
numbers before you actually draw anything, until I realized how fucking stupid and nightmarish
such a chore is, logistically speaking. I only have to draw 1 page ever, and that's the one page I'm
working toward finishing now. I pretty much have to yield to this method, or else I'll get run over
by my own momentum.
I don't aspire to draw 6,000 comic book pages anymore. I fully embrace the Now. And now that I
have NOW FOCUS, I feel much more at peace with myself and my projects.
It's nice being a God of Streaming Media. At least I've got some influence and power. Well, an
ocean of power, actually. As the creator of streaming anime, I co-engineered and co-invented the
medium of streaming in online broadcasting, and therefore whether it's legal or pirated, I still
made it all possible to begin with.
Monday, September 10th, 2012,
What is power? How do we define it?
Influence is Power
Ubiquity is Power
Money is Power
Strength is Power
Work is Power
Change is Power
Innovation is Power
Authority is Power

I have a few things going for me. I have project ideas floating around in my head. I have an
internet career and influence. I have a good relationship with famous people I speak to in Los
Angeles and Japan. I'm an author. I'm an inventor-engineer. I'm a screenwriter and designer. I'm

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well known in the field of online art and webcomics. I'm an online broadcaster and filmmaker. I
have aspirations of being an animation Exec.
My legal name and any other name I use is definitely cursed. "Joe" is a cursed name, obviously.
Bad shit happens to you if your name is Joe.

Thursday, September 13th, 2012,

Things I'm looking forward to.

The Cowboy Duster I ordered.

WATAAA!!!
Lee Sketchbook
Talking to Andrew Ahn more often
The CalArts Catalogue
CalArts itself
Traveling Across the U.S.
Traveling Across Europe
Moving and Travel for Dummies Book
Legend of Zelda Link Art Book
Next Month's (October's) paycheck
Finding out about my Dad through the private investigator
The DNA test
Writing more pilot scripts
Return to drawing after a 2 month hiatus
Publishing my eBooks The Imaginomicon Series to Booktango.com
Buying the 3-Point Perspective Grid From Art Systems
Getting better at Animation, and eventually Comics
Self Publishing Comics, and submitting it to publishers

I've got to learn to stop caring if anyone likes my art, OR if I make bad drawings. Because
chances are no one will like my art and no I won't like my own work.
Considering booktango.com doesn't even let you Revise your manuscript once it's submitted,
booktango is ANYTHING BUT a PROFESSIONAL book publishing website. And I do plan to
tell people that if they keep avoiding my emails and book.
I bought the duster yesterday. It's my very first trenchcoat! I'm so excited to see if it fits me.

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If it's a tee shirt that looks nice and comes in the size of 3XL, I'm all over that. Well, that and
duster coats. In my young adult life, I'm suddenly finding an urge to be more fashionable and
stylish in the way I dress than I used to be. No, my Mommy did not pick that out for me. She
hasn't done that since last month.
I'm going back to drawing in an American style. Not Pixar. Not Adult Swim. My own style, but
very American. I'm no longer trying to draw like a Japanese person. That started around 2002,
and ended....right now. I'm going back to drawing gothic and noir stuff.

I had a dream where I was having sex with my female friend Amanda, who I've known most of
my life.
"Yeah, you don't need to be a virgin anymore. That's stupid. I'll have sex with you. What kind of
sex positions do you like."
I told her what sex positions I liked.
"Okay, let's do those," she said, and we walked across a ballroom, and found a bedroom where
we got onto a bed and prepared to have sex.

I don't draw anime. It's a medium filled with fraud, phonies, dyslexic teenage girls, and
plagiarism. Just gross. Just awful.
Honestly, I never called my work "anime" in the first place. Or "manga" for that. Tokyopop
began classifying my work as "anime and manga" and so did DeviantART. I believed their fraud.
I believed my own hype, my own lie, people always telling me I was a great anime artist. I'm not
an anime artist and especially not a great one. I'm just an artist who draws normal, AMERICAN
artwork. I like anime, but I'm not going to bother copying it. I hardly copied it at my peek. I'm
sick of believing the anime hype and lie of companies like Tokyopop. I want my old style back,
where I didn't DRIVE MYSELF APESHIT attempting to categorize my own work as this or that,
anime, manga, animation, or comics. My style is its own thing. It's definitely NOT JAPANESE,
and DOESN'T REPRESENT JAPAN AT ALL. If Japanese people like my work and want to reinterpret it, they can do that , but I won't be joining them. By professional and international
standards, my art isn't very good. Maybe sucks even. But I'm not going by those standards. I'm
going by my own standards of innovation, originality, drawing ability, design ability, and
concept.
That takes me back. I'm drawing old characters again. They've been resurrected from the sketch
archive grave. What people don't seem to realize is, as good as I am at drawing End Times at
times, that's not my natural style. It's not the style I used to draw, and it certainly isn't the easiest

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thing for me to draw. If Zounds was what my comics were made of, I could draw a lot of pages
of that. Damn shifting, evolving arts style. My true natural style is very cartoonish. It's a mixture
of Bone, Ren and Stimpy, and SpongeBob. Comedic, slapstick, physical and dialogue humor. I
don't think I'm regressing, but ever since I stopped caring if anyone likes what I draw, I seem to
be reverting to vintage Joseph. Before all that mainstream shit happened, dumped curses and shit
on me, and generally got in my way. That's probably why it was so hard to draw sequential art
for End Times and Parallax. In one sense, it was not what I'm the most comfortable drawing. I
grew up drawing in the North American 90s Saturday Morning Cartoon style. The kind of style
kids these days aren't even aware of, due to it getting buried in all this fraudulent pseudomeaningful anime crap. I like vintage anime, but that's not what's in the open now. I'm retreating
to how I really draw. Not EVEN like Tim Burton, before even that. Like John K and Jeff Smith.
Really, really, REALLY old school stuff.
Truth is, there's Zounds and Jeff Smith / Bone Art Standards, which is what I've mastered
beyond all levels, and then there's Parallax / End Times / AKIRA / Spawn Art Standards, which
is not my natural style, but the highest level. I've been able to do the former for a long time now.
I just never made the attempt because I didn't realize how good I actually was by Western
Cartoon Standards. Not just Disney, but ALL traditional Classical Animation standards, the
tradition artists like myself were raised on. There's nothing wrong with reverting to old and
ancient styles, IF that's what you are comfortable with. And for me, it is.
I like drawing. It's the human interaction I just can't deal with. Of ANY variety. I suck at
interacting with people. It's guaranteed no matter what I do, it'll piss off or upset or outrage
someone. Fortunately I don't need human interaction just to enjoy drawing. I draw all day, any
day. I'm following Windsor McCay's example. I don't rely on input, I don't rely on respect and
praise, and I don't rely on myself or anyone else for that matter liking my work. Life is about as
awkward and humiliating as it gets, but honestly, deep down I don't give two shits about
humiliation or awkward behavior or being a minority or poor or being unpopular. I'm fine with
all that. I never said I needed a perfect life.

All feats of creativity are worthy of respect, no matter how "unprofessional, amateurish, ugly,
primitive" or "small". If someone achieves something creative, a new drawing of any kind,
whether copied or original, ugly or supremely beautiful, that creativity is to be cherished or
respected. People should not CARE if other people like it or the artist himself likes it. All
Creativity is Sacred. And All Drawings, Writings, Words, Lines, and Art that had not existed
before are to be respected and cherished. Doing otherwise just makes you a heathen. Or a
saboteur assassin. Not sure which.

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Sunday, September 16th, 2012,

I've realized what my calling is. The thaumaturgy. I aspire to be a professional thaumaturgist. I
want to create miracles in my own life, and the lives of others just like my ancestors.
Miracles are just part of a journey. Life is the Journey in which the Miracles are Performed really
only every so often
I'm starting to rethink my initial impression of Cerebus. It's a great comic, but the thing is, Dave
Sim largely gets most, if not all of the credit for it, which simply isn't reality. His "assistant" or
collaborator, Gerhard shared over 50% of the work duties, adding the hyper detailing in all the
backgrounds. If Gerhard wasn't on board, Cerebus would look like Bone or TMNT.

Monday, September 17th, 2012,

My second book (of 2012 and in the self-publishing online demographic) has now been
published, and is beginning to show up as part of the stock at both Amazon and Booktango.com.
Available as a huge e-book or kindle download for only $0.99, less than $1. I learned my lesson.
Overpricing can kill your book's sales. So I avoid overpricing any of my books that aren't my
first one, at all costs. But the cool part is, on Amazon, if you browse my book page, in the
preview for the Kindle version, it's one of the most longwinded previews I've seen for any book,
digital or none. People will definitely know whether they like my work or not, because there is a
lot more where that came from. All 100 or so pages of preview material. Out of around 600
pages of manuscript. Even if you are rich, you shouldn't overcharge people for crap.
Well, at least I have a reason for not drawing currently. You know, a GOOD EXCUSE, like the
rest of the losers. Massive Migraines. Satanic Malice towards my adoptive parents. Anger and
Stress. No one who's at THIS level of stress can draw much of anything. My stress is killing not
just my motivation and inspiration. It's incapacitating and undermining my ability to work. My
audience will get over it soon enough. ME not working. I can still write, but just not dialogue or
description. I'm too stressed to draw comics. No need for a PR Release through Twitter or the
Adult Swim Boards. I'm announcing my inability to do creative work, right here.
Tuesday, September 18th, 2012,
I sense there could be a big market for the buying, selling, and content or account licensing of
YouTube channels with large audiences. If the price for my own channel, SplitAtomBoom was
high enough, I might just sell or license that bad boy. That's one way to earn a profit. Barter your
own online real estate.

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Wednesday, September 19th, 2012,

Figuring out how I want to be compensated for my contributions to humanity, culture,
entertainment, the internet, showbiz, and the media is easy. I want money. I want money and
ONLY money, and lots of it. The only thing I want IS money. Fuck you if you make it more
complicated than that. Pay me and I'll take your side and help you out like I helped out all the
rest. You want to reward me, PAY ME MONEY. I accept money payments in cash, credit-card,
paypal, and paycheck.
I'm a kinesthetic learner, as I've found out recently. Which means I learn by action, movement,
touch, hand-eye coordination, and Doing. The only way I'm really actually going to learn to draw
comics is by doing it, drawing comics on the spot. I've already started to. The best teacher of
how to draw comic pages is the act of drawing comic book pages.
The only good comic book page by me is a new comic book page by me!
What I've learned:

Work is Better Than Jesus

I only really learn how to draw comics by taking action and actually drawing comics
I need a tape recorder for description and dialogue

Thursday, September 20th, 2012,

I've always wanted to own a magical trenchcoat and duster of my own. Finally, I have reference
fashion. I love wearing a trenchcoat! I love having my own duster. It looks really good on me.
This is the first time I've ever been completely happy with the clothing I wear, because I picked
it out and bought it myself. I draw dusters, and I wear comics dusters, much like most people
who draw comics featuring dusters.
Friday, September 21st, 2012,
I took Parallax to some of the TV people, but they weren't interested. They didn't seem to like it
that much. I'm just going to have to focus on comics, scripts, and bible presentations with
character designs and backgrounds. Parallax will be my Magnum Opus of a literary bible project.
Screenwriting
Comics & Sequential Art Pages
Storyboards
Character Designs
Fictional Novel Writing
Production Design - Art Direction

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I have All the Basic Foundations Laid Out, and All Their Rocket Launch Phases Completed!
TV Show: Pilot Script (Description; Dialogue)
Comic Book: Sequential Art Comics Pages (Panel Artwork)
Novel: Manuscript Pages (Narration: Action and Description)
The cool thing about working on creative media projects? Eventually you don't have to work up
the nerve to begin working on them anymore. And I don't just have one page for all those
categories. I have NUMEROUS PAGES for each one! God, I am making a lot of progress. It's a
miracle!
The Fundamental Template(s)

TV Animation Script (11 pgs.)

Short Fiction Manuscript Page (30-40 pgs.)
Model Sheets (4 pgs.)
Layout Page (30-40 pgs.)
Comic Book Page (150 pgs.)
Storyboard Page (3-5 pgs.)
Hardest parts of the job:

Script: Dialogue, Description

Short Fiction: Description
Model Sheets: Proportion, Anatomy
Layout: Textures, Perspective
Comics & Storyboard: Panel Composition, sizing limitations, detail
Questions Answered:

How to Write TV Animation

How to Write Novels
How to Be a Character Designer
How to Be a Production Designer
How to Draw Comics
How to Draw Storyboards

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What I've learned about comics:

Great Panels and Panel Layouts are no random occurrence. They take a vision and
especially in depth planning. Hardly any, if not no, great panels happen by accidence.
They are carefully planned and laid out. Sketched, thumbnailed, graphed, laid out,
cleaned up, and inked.
The Number One Fastest Way to Learn how to draw comics and panels is by taking
action and actually making the effort to draw comics and panels.
If you're mindful in your drawing approach and technique, that structured technique and
approach is more than a little likely to show up and manifest on the page. If you're not
trying, or not thinking out what your doing ahead of time, that's going to show through
too, unless you're incredibly lucky. But why risk it? Improvisation is good for building
up a routine of keeping the pencil moving. But just because you keep the pencil moving
doesn't mean your own line quality will look eloquent. It's important to have a planned
technique and process, like different kinds of drawing layout approaches. There's
numerous ways to approach preliminary sketching and layout. Redrafting good and so-so
art is inevitable. It goes with the territory.

There are many things I admire about the Shaw Brothers school of Hong Kong filmmaking:

Their prolificacy and productivity

Their confidence in their abilities
Their consistency. How when you watch a Shaw Brothers film from the 60s, you know
exactly what you're gonna get.
Their firm and masterful grasp of Zen and the Martial Arts
Their mastery of much of the best martial arts choreograpy in the Asian filmmaking
world
Their great action film screenwriters
Their graceful compositions of movement and the body and weapons in motion

Time to get to work with the morning shift and the late shift. Due to my shifting sleep patterns,
my work patterns are also shifting as a result. I like the idea of using the night and morning for
work, and the day and afternoon for sleep and meditation, whether it's sitting meditation or the
more advanced standing meditation.

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Saturday, September 22nd, 2012,

As far as I'm concerned, if it isn't newly draw, meticulously thought out and pre-planned
beforehand, unscanned, and drawn on gridded paper, at my drafting table (where all the magic
and detail happens), then it isn't worth jack. No I won't be publishing said pages.
Fall is Here. Good riddance, Summer! Less sleep at night, amazing comics pages, gridded paper,
new episodes of Regular Show and Star Wars: The Clone Wars, less time online, Full Comic
Book Pages that might actually look pretty decent, Trenchcoat weather.
But yes, if you use a grid on your page to draw comic book panels, it's 10,000x easier! You can
do amazing things and you're not even trying that hard!
So for the record, I drew my first REAL DECENT COMIC BOOK COMPOSITION
DRAWINGS at the young age of 28, on September 22, in 2012.
HERE and HERE:

These are modern day Master Studies, and I am quite very proud of them. They're the closest I've
ever gotten to drawing or copying professional level comics and sequential art.

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NEW PARALLAX STORY SUBPLOT!

"SIRENIS ATTACKS: WARNING! VIRUS! CONTAGIOUS."
Sirenis The Virus creates a neurobiological nano-tech virus which quickly spreads among the
earth's population, leaving death, satanic energy, and decay, depravity, violence, and destruction
in its wake. And one of the main cast members (probably Jen) becomes infected, leaving Mono
and international Shadow Op 7 R&D Science Team with one option: Find a Scientific and Holy
Water Cure For the Worldwide Virus, or say goodbye to what's left of mankind on New-Earth as
Sirus wipes it all out.
The Lesson of This Fable and Tall Tail?
Sometimes you have to turn to the parts of yourself you DON'T actually WANT TO
CONFRONT that IS BAD FOR YOU for cures and answers. Sometimes the cure and purity is
found in extracting answers from DNA samples of the disease and darkness itself, from WITHIN
YOURSELF. Or at least, it would seem so.
VILLAIN PROFILE: SIRENIS
SIRENIS is not a person or personality, but a virus, a demonic spirit. Gender has not been
determined, could be male, could be female. Part of Sirenis' power lies in hypnotic magnetism,
like a that of a very attractive man or woman and their affect on random people. Part of what
makes sirenis so hard to kill and destroy is the power of its seductive charisma. This gives it an
unusual power to manipulate those its virus infects. It's physical manifestation is the body of a
man, yet it is somewhat androgynous in nature. It's power really has nothing to do with real
human nature but the nature of corruption and evil ugly sociopathological infection in general.
Whatever destructive force Sirenis represents in actual human reality, the ability to quarantine
said social disease in other people, was given to me by The Holy Ghost. It's my newest miracle
I've been developing, in my labs. That's probably Glendis Sorrell, my birth father's Holy Spirit at
work. That's his spiritual gift to me. The ability to cure social disease, even if only in prose.

Monday, September 24th, 2012,

2012 has been a big year for me. I topped myself on nearly all levels creatively and artistically
when I began drawing with graph paper.
I'm taking my sleep medication a lot earlier, which is shifting my sleep schedule so that I'm
awake at night and rest during the day instead of getting all worked up with bad daytime people.
And I've also made the resolution to beat my porn addiction, which may or may not affect my
creativity.

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My horoscope supposedly claims the effects of these decisions will become most manifest
around the end of December 2012, or December 23rd 2012 or so, 3 or so months from now,
when my new habits will be at their "peak" supposedly. I'm looking forward to that. I already
worked 1 miracle with computer science in 2005 and another miracle with screenwriting in 2011
and this year.
Skills that have reached the next level:

Screenwriting
Storyboarding
Comics and Sequential Art
Lighting Concept Design

I need goals. So the Goals I have for my newfound high levels of performance are...

Replicate the Manga and Anime Style

Create a Career of Some Sort Out of My New Style
Study and Execute Action Choreography Fights

That's pretty much it!

Tuesday, September 25th, 2012,
Because of how much computers destroy the need to buy ANYTHING, it's that much harder to
sell ANY copies of a book if you self publish one. That's what happened to me. Because of my
so-called "Freebie voyeur audience" that pays me nothing, $0, I have no real audience. I'm a
worstseller.
Whether I publish it 2 years from now or 20 years, lets' face it, Parallax wasn't destined to be
profitable. It's fate doesn't relate to money. Because the internet steals all the money, just like
comic books and anime, I'll lose money. If anime and comics have lost money, there's no reason
to expect anything different from the e-retailer direct-path DIY route.
Therefore I am killing all work on Parallax and Mono. It's not going to pay off in the end. I'm
psychic, I can see that kind of financial pitfall well ahead of schedule, and therefore know well
enough to avoid it. I know Parallax and Mono have become my life, but that fact only existed
because I assumed I'd make money or profitability from the endeavor. But I've already put out 2
books to test the waters so to speak, and they barely made a dent in the market. I got a nice press
release and feature in Animation Magazine out of it, but it's hardly that simple. Hopefully
everyone will just forget I ever worked on End Times, Parallax, and Mono. Because they
certainly aren't going to be showing up in bookstores and newsstands. That would be pointless.
Pursuing my own economic bankruptcy would be pointless. Steven Jay Blum's voice was
helpful, as was Katsuhiro Otomo, Cartoon Network, and Adult Swim's PR support network, as

P a g e | 562

was the dozens of projects inspired by Parallax that actually made a little bit of money, but
inevitably, I'm not as lucky as any of them, and even though their power is some of the strongest
in the industry, even all of our combined power is no match for that of the haters and hackers.
Not even close. The shit stirrers are too powerful. Evil is more powerful than good.
Parallax / End Times / Mono was my life. It was what I lived every day, what I breathed every
day, my passion, my drive, my inspiration, my motivation, my stress relief. And now I have
nothing left. By giving up on these things (even if they never would have paid), it's like giving
up my will to life, my motivation and drive to live. What kept me going each day. It was my
reason for living. It's so depressing living with no Mono or End Times, with it being a thing of
the past. It was VERY important to me. Very important to my life. I feel like I'm retiring my
actual soul and spirit at the same time. Now maybe I can get some rest. I lived to see that book
completed one day, but alas, I guess it was not to be. Part of it is, I don't have enough power to
draw something that elaborate. I don't have the skill or the work ethic to bring it to life all on my
lonesome.
It's over. My goal will never be achieved. I'll never reach my goal. I'll never become the person I
hope to be. My Dream will never become my Reality
Where exactly does that leave me. Where does that leave my reality. I don't enjoy watching
anime or reading comics that much anymore. So what is there to do with all my free time,
particularly now that all my free time will never manifest my dream.
I have a dream!
Platform Software to Distribute PR and Info / Content Through the Following Platform Outlets:

YouTube (481,553)
Blogger (3,530)
Twitter (58)
Webcomics Nation (70)
Amazon Author Page (Unknown)
Amazon Book Pages (Unknown)

Wednesday, September 26th, 2012,

There's got to be a way to cash in on my popular URL and online alias Namesake.
SplitAtomBoom and Spindack are popular people online, and there's got to be a way to profit off
of their popularity that marketers are already using that I'm not seeing just yet.

P a g e | 563

Current mood: Discouraged. Flat Broke. About to collect my social security money for the
month in the next few days.
I'm adopted, and it start off a closed adoption, so technically I don't actually have any family of
my own. I don't have parents. I don't have siblings. I don't have relatives. I don't have children. I
don't have friends of my parents, siblings, relatives, or children either. I've always been on my
own. It's a lonely existence. Being adopted is kind of like being a homeless orphan. You rely on
the generosity and charity of others and their handouts for your entire survival and well being.
Getting social security while being unemployed "because of your own defective and sick
incontinent and mentally ill mind" (adoptive parents/doctors words, not mine) is the middle class
version of begging for money on the street as a homeless war vet.
But back to business...
I'm looking rather forward to seeing what kind of art artists and studios like Titmouse, Mahfood,
and LeSean Thomas produce in the future. It's possible they could be at their peaks as I write this
paragraph, but I doubt that. I think they have a lot more good projects in them. They're all young,
so no rush.
The Greatest Comics Ever Created. Period:

AKIRA
Spawn
Blade of the Immortal
Cerebus
Neon Genesis Evangelion
Jhonen Vasquez
Trigun
Bone
Sin City
Dragonball Z

Greatest Cartoons Ever Created. Period:

Akira
Ghost in the Shell, Ghost in the Shell: Innocence
The Lion King
Finding Nemo
Waking Life
The Nightmare Before Christmas
Sword of the Stranger
Gundam Universe

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Trigun
X/1999
Batman: The Animated Series
Animatrix
Fullmetal Alchemist
Trinity Blood
Yu Yu Hakusho
IGPX
Teen Titans
Invader ZIM
Dragonball Z
Rurouni Kenshin
Samurai Champloo
Cowboy Bebop
FLCL
Dead Leaves
9
Spawn
Samurai Jack
Star Wars: Clone Wars (Franchise)
Dexter's Laboratory
Ghost in the Shell Stand Alone Complex 2nd Gig
Monster
Aqua Teen Hunger Force
Avatar: The Last Airbender
Aeon Flux
Martin Mystery
Oban Star Racers

I gotta say, my comics I've made so far and self-published through Lulu.com. Not very well
drawn. And sloppy. And unrefined. And primative. And lazy.
But on the plus side they are not a true representation of my real illustrative and artistic abilities.
Art - Manifested is closer to achieving that. At least some of the artwork there is realistic and
detailed. Same thing with my archives. A lot of it is really good. So why does my typical comic
book page suck so bad. Well, my comic book pages are younger than most of my sketchbook
pages. I've been drawing sketchbooks and illustrations for longer than I've been drawing comics
for in total (only a few years). I should stick to pencilled drawings for now.

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I've been focusing on my face and personal mannerisms and appearance too much when I'm out
in public, and therefore that self-awareness only magnifies itself through my life's existence and
the media. Every minute I spend thinking about my face, even when someone on TV projects it
to me blatantly, is one more focus further away from me NOT drawing more master studies of
AKIRA. When I'm out in public, I have to develop the confidence to transcend only thinking
about my presence and body and the power of my body language and physical presence. The
focus on my public appearance and mannerisms begins with me and my internal thought process
and ends with my internal thought process. I need to stop shutting off my Homebound Mind
when I'm not in my home. Not doing that will only amplify the monster I've created.
Every day can be a lucky day, Your Lucky Day, if You Focus on the Positive and Let It Be.
The Bridge to another world will always manifest itself, but even though it appears over time, no
one ever sees it get built right away.

Saturday, September 29th, 2012,

Blogger and YouTube: International Audience Status! My International Penpals
Here are the countries that read my blog and watch my videos, internationally speaking.
JM's Blog - Most Popular In:
United States, Russia, Ukraine, United Kingdom, China, Germany, Latvia, Canada, France,
Japan, Chile, Iraq,
YouTube: SplitAtomBoom - Most Popular In:
United States, Germany, Mexico, United Kingdom, Japan, Canada, Brazil, Russia, Columbia,
Italy, Argentina, Poland, Serbia, France, Greece, Spain, The Netherlands, Philippines, Japan,
Malaysia, Indonesia, Thailand, India, Taiwan, Singapore, Kazakhastan, South Korea, Israel,
Georgia, Turkey, Saudi Arabia, United Arab Emirates, Cyprus, Armenia, Kuwait, Argentina,
Peru, Chile, Venzuela, Ecuador, Uruguay, South Africa, Tunisia, Morocco, Egypt, Kenya

I'm better at literary commentary, review, and critique of the arts and technology than I am at
actually writing fiction. I'm a better commentator and lyricist than I am a narrator or storyteller.

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Monday, October 1st, 2012,

Welcome to Central Florida, where people still haven't sold out. Where people still actually
believe in the American Dream, for the most part. Anime is beautiful to look at and eloquent. It's
pretty. But it's killing the American Dream in the eyes of America's Youth. YouTube IS the
American Dream. Silicon Valley and the dot com economy IS The American Dream. I'm 28
going on 29, I don't have a dime to my name, but dammit, I still believe in the American dream,
even if I'm not entirely 100% American. It's a Good Dream. It's a Wholesome Dream, and it's a
Healthy Dream. Dreaming of success and money, and making it to the top through hard work,
prayers, and belief. Conviction that you can move upward. Obama 2012. That in my opinion is
what America is about. NOT 9-11, NOT WAR, NOT THE ILLUMINATI. NOT CRIME.
Wholesome family and adulthood values.

OBAMA is The American Dream

Science and Technology is The American Dream
ENTREPRENEURSHIP and Twitter is The American Dream
LOS ANGELES is The American Dream
YouTube and the Web 2.0 is The American Dream
Mark Zuckerberg and the Billions of $ he owns is The American Dream
Science-Fantasy Literature and Post-Apocalyptic Shit (the trademark) is The American
Dream
Mono Jubei is The American Dream
I am The American Dream

Approval, and the seeking of it, no longer factors into my worldview. It's not fun to be hated, but
it isn't something you should get your panties in a knot about either.

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Chapter 9

P a g e | 568

JM Matthew's Published Body of Work:

The Imaginomicon: Volume I
&
Art: Manifested
by
J.M. Matthews

Left Brain

Right Brain

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Monday, October 1st, 2012,

Current Rhapsody Playlist:
Green Day, Uno
Better than American Idiot. 21st Century Breakdown was an amazing album, and was actually
listenable, unlike AI. Uno is quite listenable. It's rather catchy. Just like their peers like Weezer,
Green Day's melodies are infectious and catchy as hell more often than not. It's definitely not hit
or miss. Billy Joe Armstrong has a very definitive sense of superior melody, even when he's not
trying that hard. He's also a wicked good songwriter.

Wednesday, October 3rd, 2012,

Listen, children, to a story
That was written long ago
'Bout a kingdom on a mountain
And the valley folk below
On the mountain was a treasure
Buried deep beneath a stone
And the valley people swore
They'd have it for their very own
Go ahead and hate your neighbor
Go ahead and cheat a friend
Do it in the name of Heaven
You can justify it in the end
There won't be any trumpets blowing
Come the judgment day
On the bloody morning after who...
One tin soldier rides away
So, the people of the valley
Sent a message up the hill
Asking for the buried treasure,
Tons of gold for which they'd kill
Came an answer from the kingdom,
"With our brothers, we will share
All the secrets of our mountain,
All the riches buried there"
Now, the valley cried with anger,
"Mount your horses, draw your sword!"
And they killed the mountain people
So, they won their just reward

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Now, they stood beside the treasure
On the mountain dark and red
Turn the stone and looks beneath it...
"Peace on Earth" was all it said
Go ahead and hate your neighbor
Go ahead and cheat a friend
Do it in the name of Heaven
You can justify it in the end
There won't be any trumpets blowing
Come the judgment day
On the bloody morning after who...
One tin soldier rides away
Go ahead and hate your neighbor
Go ahead and cheat a friend
Do it in the name of Heaven
You can justify it in the end
There won't be any trumpets blowing
Come the judgment day
On the bloody morning after who...
One tin soldier rides away

-"One Tin Soldier"

At some point I realized Mono is an archetype. An archetypal figure. What with his spikey hair,
silhouetted Matrix-French-New-Wave-inspired black trenchcoat, and John Woo - Ninja Turtlestyle dual wielding. I borrow from numerous genres and archetypes to create my own. No one's
ever drawn a protagonist who wears a black coat and fights with Two-Swords, like Leonardo
before. That's something I created! It's not practical, but it is cool! I'm going to get a copyright on
it.
I'm going to contain my art and keep it at a 3 page a day limit. I can try harder, but why. Why not
just take my time and enjoy myself.
Worked on a short story a little bit, finally stopped procrastinating at my short fiction writing. I
also stopped procrastinating at developing the production design of my comic book. No panels
though. Got some sleep earlier this evening.

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Friday, October 5th, 2012,

Thanks to me tweeting about it, Manifesto Vol. I now has 55 reads on Scribd, a popular literary
reading website. At first I wasn't going to use Scribd to publish any of my work, but using
Twitter w/ Scribd makes for one powerful way to market your book(s). Now I'll probably use
Scribd to promote my published works more often.
Saturday, October 6th, 2012,
Where exactly am I in my comic book career? I'm exactly where I should be.
I've self-published 3 official stand alone End Times issues, and 4 comic issue 1-shots. That's a
total of 7-8 comic book issues of raw, mostly unrefined material. Sure I'm producing low quality
sequential art now, but will I still be sucking so much in 10 years from now if I keep at it? My
comic book is a secret, hence the reason no one's heard of it. The published issues are a secret in
one sense, and are available to order on a secret account that isn't publicly displayed. My secrecy
is getting in the way of my sales.
Newest horoscope (a Vedic one) says I'm popular, and will have lasting wealth and fame.
I've got to decide: Be popular with a hot girl, or continue working on comics. Not an easy
dilemma. Both are rewarding for obvious reasons, but it's so tough to decide. Work or social
engagement, which I don't normally have the luxury of indulging in. Deciding between women
and creating comics is hard.
Technologists and Scientists are predicting that in 3 to 4 years, by the year 2016, the medium I
help create and invent, online streaming video and video sharing, will make up 90% of online
traffic. Or in other words, the vast majority of traffic will be video based and there to watch
videos online. Whoa! That's a lot! As a matter of fact 90% is 10 times beyond what I ever
expected to happen. My influence has grown so much, it's turning into a webshare monopoly.
The YouTube Video Monopoly. Not that I think that's a bad thing. Maybe by 2016, Glomera will
finally be out of Beta Mode, and maybe I'll actually be able to store videos online finally, and not
have to watch my computer crash.
Media Companies most involved in social media? FUNimation, [adult swim], Cartoon Network.
Toonami. There's really only a handful of media companies that COMPLETELY embrace social
media and the web 2.0.
I just realize something: I don't have any new heroes. I don't have any new heroes I admire from
the current and new generation. Generations Y and the Millennials. Why don't I admire anyone
younger than me, or even slightly older for that matter. Maybe because I'm getting older, and
they still look like a bunch brats. I need some new heroes. But who??
How to draw a comic book:

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Draw preliminary and thumbnail sketches

Only focus on backgrounds, layout, and pencilling
Use graph paper and ruler
Study other comics and copy their poses
Study your own anatomy in a mirror (poses)

Right now, I'm the WORST cartooning cleanup artist in the world. My job is to take that "worst"
and turn it into a "Best".
To be honest, I suppose I could compromise a little bit. I've been on anti-psychotics for at least a
decade, and no one's hassled me about it. Mostly because my dad's pharmacist, so the public is
fool into thinking what my parents do with pharmaceuticals is "appropriate because that's his
career". No one seems to feel this is an actual injustice who isn't me. Because of these facts, I
guess I can accept the anti-psychotic medicine in my life if everyone else can. There are worse
drugs to do. And afterall, by some miracle, even WITH all those anti-psychotic pills in my rather
messed up system, still somehow managed to produce END TIMES, PARALLAX, and over
100 original comic book pages. So there's that. And I still somehow managed to write over 3,000
pages, draw over 3,000 pages of art, and still manage to find the time to become a world famous
celebrity. I still opened my 3rd eye. Medication won't kill or injure you. It might make you
fatigued, but there's worse ways to end up than on antipsychotic pills, especially if no one but
you cares about that fact, just consider yourself lucky no one noticed you were on meds to begin
with. Now THAT's Compromise.
Just like any other comics professional working in the field, I've had to self-publish a lot of pilot
issues that isn't that fun to look at, that doesn't really have much of a story, and that's just tossed
together and self-published in a bunch of pilot issues. Am I proud of this work? No, but I also
realize this is where most artists who are pros now: This kind of situation is how they ALL
started out. They slaved away at mediocre work in the salt mines until they reached a level and
volume of quality that was A) Appealing, and B) Long, Narrative, and Continuous Enough to
satisfy the market. You've always got to do the crap before you reach a respectable level.
The journey to being a profitable and successful comic book artist of my caliber is riddled with
insecurity and social terror, and it can be thankless, lonely work doing all those readerless
webcomics and one-shots, if you're anything like me. But you do improve over time, and there is
light at the end of the tunnel, or at least I hope there is. I'm considernig giving my better, future
comic books away for free at Megacon or something.
Tuesday, October 8th, 2012,
My adoptive parents are definitely evil eye cursed, bad luck, and dead weight. No wonder I hate
them. I'm naturally lucky and they're naturally unlucky. They dead weight. They're slowing me

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down. And they can't even acknowledge or admit it, even though there's tons of proof of this
theory.
WARRIOR OF THE PAGE AND SCREEN
THE WARRIOR'S WAY
A WARRIOR JOURNAL

I am a Warrior. That means a few things. I never lose. I never allow myself to lose, death before
dishonor. And I've always got an opponent and competitor, or "rivals"
Other warriors of the page and screen:

Tarantino
The Wachowki's
Rob Schrab
Jhonen
Genndy
Hiroaki Samura-sensei
Otomo-Sensei
Shinichiro Watanabi
Osamu Tezuka
Todd McFarlane
Dave Sim
Ken Wilber
Tolkien
Stephen King
Steven Spielberg
Steve Blum
Sean Akins
George Lucas

These are some of the greatest warrior spirits of storytelling history! Because these are the most
intense.
I don't just think. I'll know I'll get my own mainstream media project, if I just hang in there and
work hard for the next 1 or 2 decades, at the 40 or later range. But realistically speaking, I gotta
master comics before I master animation and licensing.

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I'm going to have to set a deadline for myself, unfortunately. Things only get done with a
deadline.
I may not be on the throne now, but I'm definitely waiting in line for the opportunity. I've got
plenty of power. When I speak, people respond. React, respond, acknowledge, however you
want to put it. When I write, people listen and read. When I promote something, people go out
and buy that thing, particularly with anime. I have a lot of power in the anime industry and
culture. A lot of influence and sway. Definitely a power player of sorts for international
animation, more so worldwide than even my own home country of the United States.
I'm influential with international culture and media, animation worldwide, comedy, journalism (a
lot of reporters write about and report on me in this country).
It's not the actual making of the show or comic book that I'm afraid of. It's all the very public,
very social PR and con attendance work that creators get pressured with so much nowadays.
Why do you have to be so social with the public just because you're doing a show? Though I
don't act or think like a stereotypical foreigner, or an arab guy, a middle eastern guy, an African
American guy, or a Chinese or French guy, all those things are in my blood. And over time, with
the more popular myself and my work get, the more I'm going to have to adjusted to people
judging me by looks alone. I'm the first successful multiracial comic book and animation creator.
I took part in the 11th annual 2012 Animation Magazine pitch party. I was the only multiracial
adopted person who entered. Kind of a big deal. I don't view race as an asset. You can use being
Arab as an asset. Not in this era anyway.
Wednesday, October 9th, 2012,
There are a few projects I'm working on currently:

"Warriors" The Black & White, Acrylic, and Charcoal Illustration Series (book)
The Duel - Krin vs. Mono
Jack Knight Short Story
Parallax - Druidon Pilot

When I finally have a career and daily job that pays money, a little or a lot, I'm looking forward
to dropping some of my money down on a car and house, and probably living alone in or outside
of FL. too.
Katsuhiro Otomo is going to make his second scheduled U.S. appearance in what seems like
forever, if not ever. I'm not really familiar with his schedule of course and I don't know a lot
about Otomo and his Journey, but he's going to be making an appearance at and receiving an
international animation award at a California Animation Festival CalArts is hosting. This is a big
deal to me that my all time favorite animation director and comic book creator will be at an art
school I hope to attend by 2014, if the planets are aligned just right of course. Apparently he

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might just be really shy about social appearances. He's probably like Corey Jackson and myself.
Not exactly the centre of attention. Just powerfully introverted, due to how much of an
international genius he is. Him making a public appearance is in some ways like John Lasseter
making a public appearance. It's a pretty big deal. He's famous in his industry, but not famous
like Michael Jordan or Steven Spielberg famous, yet still up there in terms of influence.
I sense it is in my destiny to eventually meet Katsuhiro Otomo at some point, whether it's in his
own office over in Tokyo, Japan, or a public appearance like the ones at Comic-Con and
CalArts. My life doesn't feel like it would be complete until by some miracle I did reach my goal
and I actually did meet Katsuhiro Otomo, whether it was at my home in Los Angeles, or his
home in Tokyo, Japan. Either one is fine by me. I feel we are somehow connected. I felt the
exact same feelings from a distance, as a fan, toward Steve Blum for years. Now we're quite the
online friends, and he's got my back! It's the greatest feeling in the world, meeting someone who
does live up to the hype on such a profound and humanitarian level. Otomo put out that Gengha
book in Japan, and other art books, like Kaba 2 and Kaba, and Steamboy Storyboards. I will own
them all.
I think I'm turning into a night owl. I'm going to be hiring a taxi to drive me around to various
places downtown and in downtown Casselberry and Orlando, late at night at 10 p.m. or later,
right at the time my parents are settling in for the night. I'll be using my monthly Social Security
paychecks to pay the cab fare and pay for Burger King and Steak and Shake and trips to the city
when the time is late and the roads are empty mostly. Taxi's are one way to get around local
Florida that's like a chauffeur but better than the bus.
Katsuhiro Otomo visiting my school. That would be pretty amazing. We seem to be drawn to one
another creatively and career wise, yet we seem to come from such opposite ends of the
spectrum. He is accustomed to being a King. I'm accustomed to being considered by others as a
pest and outcast. Am I really worthy of being in the presence of an auteur that amazing. Only
time will tell.
In terms of SplitAtomBoom channel ratings, Big O looks to have a shot at being the next
Gorillaz. I might have a new hit on my hands. So far I've gotten new views every day for Big O.
Depends on a lot of conditional factors though. The numbers definitely seem to be there.
Either I can focus on broadcasting Big O for YouTube, Gorillaz style, or I can focus on End
Times and Parallax for CalArts, Oni, Twitter, Funimation, Image, Marvel, Disney, Steve Blum,
WCN, and Katsuhiro Otomo. Those people moreso than fans because for a while now I only
consider my audience to be the people who actually bother to show me some love, not the people
who criticize and hassle me. The latter group is an enormous waste of time.

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Thursday, October 11th, 2012,

In terms of CN, Adult Swim/Toonami (CN's 20th Birthday is this month, October 2012). I'd love
to sell an action cartoon, anime, or co-pro to their network, any of them really, but just as I'm
sure they too know, the timing has to be right, the circumstances should be favorable, and the
format, genre, and demographic is still being decided. Truth is, I don't know exactly how exactly
I want to do End Times on TV yet. It can't be all things to all people. I know it's an important
show concept, and creative and innovative and new and well-done, which is often uncommon
with American shows lately, but eventually I'm going to have to settle in on a mode of
operations, and just go with it, and stick with it. For now, Mono and End Times already have
owned-by-me presence in Animation Magazine's pages, Google, WCN, and the internet
webcomics scene. This space my concept fills, my platform as they say in the biz, can definitely
be used to market the hell out of my work, which I do plan to utilize whenever I have more
material finished. "It Takes Time to Build!" That in and of itself may or may not be difficult to
do to begin with. But because I have made it this far, I dare not take it for granted or make the
same mistakes over and over again anymore. I'm ready to take my career to the next level. I have
different platforms. I have the art platform, the End Times platform, the Google platform, the
Animation Magazine platform, the YouTube and Twitter platform, and my connection to Time
Warner and Cartoon Network's franchise in the long run. Even to this day, for the most part,
they're the most forward, supportive, and loyal to me. I hope to one day repay them with a
finished project and millions in profits for both of us!
Nerd Corps' Asaph Fipke put it best when he said "When it comes to our work routine and
process, it's not effortless, but we do have a system in place". Well said. I hope to achieve the
same effect at some point soon. Maybe tomorrow.
It's mindboggling to think I could help the public perception in the American animation
community's knowledge of Katsuhiro Otomo, in anyway, and yet this morning, I did, when I
shared knowledge of a pre-existing news story about Katsuhiro Otomo's visit to CalArts to
receive an award for international animation. I broke the story to Animation Magazine. ME! I
did it! Yeah, go me! Woo!!!

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Here it is...The story I broke to Ramin Zahed, Editor In Chief of Animation Magazine:
Home Festivals and Events Otomo to Appear at Platform Animation Fest

October 10, 2012 by Mercedes Milligan

Killer news for anime fans: Katsuhiro Otomo, the legendary director of Akira (for which he also wrote and illustrated the original
manga), is set to make his first U.S. public appearance since 1990 at the Platform International Animation Festival, where he will
be presented with a Lifetime Achievement Award on Saturday, October 27 at 9:30 p.m. The evening will begin with an exclusive
screening of Otomos new short film Combustible, followed by a discussion with animation historian Jerry Beck, and then the
award ceremony.
It is an incredibly great honor for PLATFORM to welcome Katsuhiro Otomo to the United States after so many years absence,
said Festival Director Irene Kotlarz. We are delighted to present him with our first Lifetime Achievement Award in honor of his
unique and original contribution to the art of animation. In recognizing an artist whose origins are deeply rooted in manga,
PLATFORM continues its polemical mission to break boundaries into other art forms and embrace a concept of animation that
represents the widest possible range of influences.
Katsuhiro Otomo is internationally recognized as one of the leading creative forces in Japanese anime and manga, as well as a
huge influence on modern day Hollywood filmmakers like Sam Raimi, Chris Nolan and the Wachowskis. Otomo began his
career writing and drawing manga in thes 1970s before beginning his animation career as a character designer in the early 80s.
His Akira manga was published from 1982-88 and then adapted as a feature in 88, which Otomo wrote and directed.
The Akira film became a game-changer for Japanese animation and has become a classic example of the art form and the sciencefiction genre.
Several of Otomos short films can be seen in the compilation features Robot Carnival andNeo-Tokyo. He wrote the screenplay
for Osamu Tezukas 2001 animated version ofMetropolis, and directed several live-action movies. While continuing to work in
comics, he went on to direct the animated features Memories (1995), Steamboy (2004) and this years short Combustiblewhich
is set in 18th century Edo and explores a childhood friendship that has blossomed into a frowned-upon romance.

Combustible
PLATFORM, which is put on by CalArts and the Roy and Edna Disney/CalArts Theater (REDCAT) will take place Oct. 26-28 in
Los Angeles. Visit www.redcat.org for tickets andplatformfestival.com for more information.

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It's amazing to think I could have any influence or power over people's knowledge of or chances
of meeting Katsuhiro Otomo, and yet here I am, I broke the story to Ramin and the evidence of
my input is right there! I'm happy I could help.

Friday, October 12th, 2012,

Today must be my lucky day. I finished editing my first real decent comic book today. It's
actually all original artwork (all 20 pages of it), and it actually looks like a real professional level
comic book, or something resembling one in some ways. Today must be my lucky day. I've now
produced enough original comics and sequential art work to fill up an entire issue of panels. I've
been waiting for this moment. I'm a real life comics creator-author, manga-ka, cartoonist, and
storyteller now! This makes for a wicked 1-shot, pilot issue, or portfolio issue. Some parts of it
actually have story, and all pages are at least partially polished. There could always be more of
course, but I'm glad I get to start somewhere. I stapled the comic book together by hand, instead
of turning to my usual Lulu account to bind and self print.
My comics 1 shot that looks perfect has given me a sense of closure. For the first time in my life,
I'm happy with the kinds of comics pages and sequential art I'm drawing. For the first time in my
life ever, I'm not depressed and disappointed and impatient with my sequential art abilities. My
pages actually have some structure to them.
Sometimes I wish I got more praise than I actually do get. Getting praise is therapeutic for me.
There's a hole in my heart, even if I did save my comics career in the long run. Is this all I get for
doing a good job. A manuscript stapled together and sitting on a table with no one talking to me
about me. Lying down on a couch alone watching boring reruns. Damn, when I made the
decision to make comics, I thought it would be more exciting than this.
I finished the first satisfactory issue. This is a historic moment in my career.
Chapter I, Volume. I of my comics Journey is Complete. I've achieved a prototype, a flow within
my pages. The Beginning of my Epic Journey is Complete. Now it's onto all the other chapters.
Doing more pages, and writing more script, and filling up more sketchbooks.
Though yes, if I went to CalArts, my major would be animation, and yes they exclusively offer
degrees in animation, during my studies there I'd also be using what I learned in the animation
curriculum and applying it to my comics, so I can become a better cartoonist as well. Not just a
better animator, writer, and producer.

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Saturday, October 13th, 2012,

There are certain professional artists and writers I'm starting to rely on for opinions on my work:

Steve Blum
Corey
Jhonen
Ramin Zahed
Andrew Ahn of CalArts

But before I switch into critique mode from them, I've got to do some self-critique. Here's what I
liked about END TIMES: Pilot (at Blogspot and WCN):
Positive:

Awesome Action in Sword Fighting Panels

Good deadpan dialogue for "The Investigation"
Good use of Cover Imagery
Good use of compositing character over buildings in BG
Good Use of Silent and Quiet Moments in panels and page compositions
Good use of Spotting Blacks on some pages

Negative:

A little Too Simple in certain areas

Not always polished
Need a Better Grasp of Anatomy and Perspective
More Backgrounds Needed. Backgrounds Underdeveloped and Sloppy in Some panels

Jhonen SPEAKS! (Or is it "tweets"?"):

Loving how crammed full of character Hell Yeah! is. It looks like how my
brain THOUGHT awesome games looked back on the Genesis. 5 hours ago

Projects I'm Currently In Charge of

SplitAtomBoom@YouTube
JM/EndTimes@Webcomicsnation
WarriorSpirit@Twitter
www.jm-macabre.com
Blogspot Multi Accounts
e-book: Imaginomicon (syndicated)

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Art Manifested @ Amazon / Amazon.co.jp

Pitch Party 2012 @ Animag

Sunday, October 14th, 2012,

I love new things, I'm all for establishing new brands, markets, niches, and careers. I've built
plenty of them myself for others. But most people in the media and press are groupies for the old
and established. If you come out with something innovative, ambitious, and new, chances are the
media and press will ignore you and refuse to give you the time of day. Worry not. That is how
all new brands get treated. They get ignored and treated with negligence. Most newly formed
brands and creative projects and visions do get ignored. People fear innovation on a collective
basis. Innovation is normally treated like the bad by the mainstream. That's normal protocol.
My pages on the other hand, are improving. I definitely feel like my work is improving. I drew
and composited a comic book page layout today in Manga Studio Pro. I took the compositions of
my most action packed pages of sword fights, and amplified the dynamism. I took the style of
the pages and amplified and exaggerated the shit out of them! Todd McFarlane used to do simple
pages too, but kept amplifying his dynamism in each successive page. I'm essentially
incorporating his dynamism techniques and applying it to my own work. This new page actually
feels like there's a camera there, and not just like a Sega Genesis Side-Scrolling Fighter or Video
Game. That way is cool and all too, but what I really want to do is take my greatest work and
keep pushing it even further and keep amplifying the dynamism. I don't want to make my comic
book pages and sequential art perfect. I want them to be dynamic, and increase their dynamism
over time and multiple attempts and tries at new pages.
The only notable sword books and shows that aren't mine would be Star Wars: The Clone Wars,
Hiroaki Samura's Blade of the Immortal, Star Wars Comics, Conan Comics, and Bleach. Bleach
is quesitonable, but at least it's a sword franchise. But Star Wars can duel Circles around Bleach
in its SLEEP!
American:

Star Wars
Conan

Japanese

Bleach
Blade of the Immortal

I wonder where that leaves me, other than "out of a job" of course.

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I've found a solution to my crack-like online art addiction. I'm not GOING TO quit. I'm going to
supplement the DA art I keep looking at (which is mostly coloring and character design) with
real sequential art and manga pages from Japan. Thank god for scanlations. That's one source of
finding new manga art material to appreciate, browse, and read for free. I'm really finding myself
liking both Break Blade and Jackal, to name a few.
About my manga series comics pages:
1 page down. 9 more pages to go.
Some of my favorite innovative medium-building "comics-&-animation builders & pioneers":

Windsor McCay (Animation)

Moebius (Detail, Science-Fantasy)
Katsuhiro Otomo (Anime-Manga)
Jamie Hewlett (Style)
Todd McFarlane (Heroes, Action, Detail, Storytelling)
Jhonen Vasquez (Creativity, Design)

I'm one of the more powerful Scorpios out there.

My power and energy have evolved over time to become most manifest in two areas. My two
main areas: My Warrior Spirit, and my International Technological Ingenuity. I'm really, really
good at writing, authoring, and drawing action and dark science-fantasy stories. For what I do,
I'm one of the very best. In the making, at the very least.
Action influences. Action Professors:

Quentin Tarantino
Bruce Lee
Jackie Chan
Yuen Woo-Ping
The RZA
Shinichiro Watanabe
Titmouse
Toonami
Production I.G.
Todd McFarlane
Bruce Timm
LeSean Thomas
Frank Miller

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Monday, October 15th, 2012,

For manga, each Chapter is around 12 to 14 pages long.
Went on a joyride with Mom today. We visited the airport. Because of one of their signs
on the drive to the front gate, I found out there's a European Airline that flies exclusively
to and from Europe and Florida now. Air France. This airline opened in OIA in 2011, or
last year. And a new historic chapter in Florida Aviation was Written last year, a chapter I
want to be a part of.
Air France is right down the road from my house, seeing as Air France is part of OIA,
and the airport is down the road from my house. It's great! I'm glad I overcame my fear of
being near airplanes again. Airplanes aren't so scary when you're right beside them.
Just as Chinatown is in my own hometown, The Spiritual Doorway to an International
Spiritual European and Parisian Journey is right in my own "back road" driveway. The
Doorway to a Foreign Land opened around halfway through last year, 2011. I wouldn't
have to even leave Florida just to visit France by air. The Miraculous Sign that this was
possible came to me in the form of a road sign, so it's literal, AND figurative.
Traveling has a spiritual value to me. In my world it's a Sin to stay in the same place too
long.
Suddenly, France seems a lot less far away. Hard to put my finger on how this newfound
discovery in my local city works or will affect the future exactly. I'm less afraid of flying
and more prepared to Fly to France when the time comes.
Travel Destinations:
Los Angeles, California
Toronto, Canada
Boulder, Colorado
Phoenix, Arizona
Paris, France
Hong Kong, China
Tokyo, Japan
I can't stop thinking about the local airline Air France. So since Transcontinental
European bound flights fly to and from Florida and Europe, does that mean France is
connected to or part of Central Florida now. I can't help but feel like it brings the two

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places closer together in spirit, travel, and cultural network. That means it is easier to
travel between the two places, which is something that's really cool! As a fan of Parisian
and French literature, film, animation, comics, food, architecture, and culture, I sense the
start of something, a silent international connection, making life easier for people like me.
There are many roads that lead towards my goals, but I'll take a familiar road that feels
uncomfortable over never getting around to actually getting started and taking the entire
journey. Any day. There is no option toward my future that doesn't involve me being
terrified and uncomfortable. It became obvious to me when I was going for a drive earlier
today. I'd rather have my mom there with me and feel uncomfortable around strangers
I've never met than venture out into a social disaster that is me trying to do everything by
myself. Family and Florida aren't that bad. And now that the new development's
available, it's that much easier to travel long distances. This is going to change some
things. Maybe make Florida look like a better option and place to some people, including
myself. We don't have to always like our family, but when your own home country
forsakes you as it does me, the only other real option is pretty much sit there, do nothing,
and continue to be miserable. At least traveling with my mother brings some comfort.
I'm going to France one day because that's where all the great comic book isolationist
recluses go who don't want to be hassled by TV or Hollywood or the internet. I'm no
longer planning for the future. This is the future. It can't be changed. I'm living in it. I'm
living the future. This is my future. Unpaid, unemployed, on social security and fat as
hell with bad teeth and a public that views me as a punchline, as opposed to someone
anyone likes or respects in America. That's life. It isn't fair. Now get over it.
Tuesday, October 16th, 2012,
The European Union was awarded the 2012 Nobel Peace Prize today. That's the most
prestigious award in the world. Pretty big deal. London, Paris, Madrid, and Berlin are the
main top ranked cities associated with the organization of the European Union.
On October 11th, a Chinese native and author won the 2012 Nobel Prize for literature.
His name is Mo Yan and he's the first Chinese person after Gao Xinjian to be awarded
the Nobel Prize for literature, and the first person living in China to receive the award.
The countries of my genetic ancestry and heritage are doing really well with the Nobel
committee recently. Britain, China, France, Tunisia, Morocco, and Berber, are all making
all sorts of progress for future peace and harmony. From Arab Spring to the Nobel Peace
Prize. Not to brag or anything of course.

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Sensing Energy, Chi, or "Power"

Energy is Power. Power is Energy. Energy is another Form of Power.
Energy drinks are really power drinks. Caffeine gives us energy, and therefore power
The palm of a non-dominant hand is the best resource for sensing power actively, where
you control sensing the power.
The spine is the most active passive energy sensor. When we feel a tingling in our spine
is when we sense the highest power. I feel the most power in other places, things, and
people when I get goosebumps.
Honestly, I'm just going to spit it out. I'm no longer the endorser and public diplomatic
personality for anime or Japan I once was. I grow weary of the politics of Japanese
anime, and I'm probably going to leave while an exit is still feasible. Honestly, France is
just easier to deal with, and closer to what I'm used to dealing with in certain ways. The
French market doesn't seem to hold as much hostility and politics for me as the Japanese
market. I still like some of the same Japanese artists and probably always will. I just don't
see that cultural admiration growing anytime soon. Japan is self sustaining. I doubt it
needs me anymore. I doubt it ever really "needed" me. There's too much bullshit going on
with American-based otaku nowadays, too much cyber-bullying and snobbery that I'm
more than happy to leave behind in favor of discovering newer, less established markets
in other regions. Consider this my resignation letter disowning what I once was and what
I once believed in with much conviction. It was fun for a while, and I attained much
power and popularity. But let's face it. It's not the same industry I grew up with. I
attracted a lot of groupies, and it's gone mainstream now. What with over 1 million
people showing up an Anime Expo. That's not animation. That's rock and roll. It's rock
and roll and arena football. But it's not animation. Animation is friendly and down to
earth, and Japanese anime most certainly isn't that. I'm not "anti". I'm just not actually
participating outside of YouTube. I've had enough of this political show business
nonsense. I'm sure plenty of kids would love to take my place if they could. And as far as
I'm concerned, they can. Doesn't bother me at all. I'm out of here.
Wednesday, October 17th, 2012,
I'm glad I'm retiring from both America and anime. In the long run, there's a good
likelihood I'll be leaving both behind. And once I leave even the most powerful force in
the world won't be able to "bring me back". Now that I've made the resolution, and made
up my mind about my retirement, even God Himself can't change that.

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Honestly, I should say right now I have no desire to live in someone else's reality. The
only reality I can truly accept is my own reality. I don't accept others' realities. Those are
fake and fraudulent to me.
I hate how you have to drive just to go anywhere in this country. Europe isn't like that.
We only assume it is. Just as Europe doesn't promote nationalism, rushing through
everything, being impatient, or fake-ass corporate "toothpaste-orgasm" marketing.
Americans are also the most violent and angry culture in the world. Just look at their pop
culture. And they force you to drive many miles in horrific roadways full of assholes in
other cars just to get to local businesses or restaurants. Here, they're also arrogant and
obnoxious as hell about foreign cultures and their own culture (even though most people
in the U.S. have never traveled either long or short distances).
Emigration is a new topic for me.
Being active gives me power. This is because being active generates energy, and energy
is power that's accessible.
What am I doing with my life? I feel so lost. Ever since I stopped talking to Phil, the only
father-like figure I've ever had in my life, I've been lacking direction. I don't have a
strong mentor figure or sensible father figure in my life.
Okay, enough feeling sorry for myself and lost, I think I just got my second wind for the
night. .
What is my objective? Keep drawing comics, and keep designing animation. Defend my
title? Is that last one even necessary?
What am I having trouble with: Comics Panels still need practice. Pilot Script needs to
be finished. But fortunately I already designed the working models for both of these. I
have a greater system of construction and building in place than I had before.
I'm still feeling kind of overwhelmed by my life and work hours.
Ultimately, for now,
All I have to do is draw 1 new comics page (1 at a time)
And write the other half, or 2 action scenes from my script.

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Thursday, October 18th, 2012,

Things students and teachers really want to teach and learn:

Production Design
Design
Costume Design
Sequential Art
Storyboard
Writing
Paneling
Lighting
Drawing Fighting
Fabric and Cloth

The "rumor"? That I have the ability to sense the level of hostility, malice, and ill will in
enemies. That is so very true.
When drawing comics, there's a way to do it systematically.
Like using the following:

Mapping
Prelim sketches, stick figures
Posing in front of a mirror in costume with props
Thumbnail sketches, Grid Layout Paneling
Pencilling
Manga Studio Pro
Cleanup
Inking

There's strategy involved in building a comic book page, or even something as "simple"
as a panel. Good panels don't just happen. They take planning and strategy. The more you
just rush in there with no strategy or plan, the more your pages will suck.
I'm fascinated by and in love with the concept of taking nothing and building something
out of nothing, almost like a magic trick. I like building something (a design, art, books,
comics, projects, and empire, a legacy) out of what is essentially and was previously

P a g e | 587

nothing. It's cathartic. Nothing is depressing. Building something is not. It's the opposite
of nothing. Building something makes me happy. Having nothing makes me depressed.
Friday, October 19th, 2012,
According to an article I read online, if you're not drawing enough in your own mind,
chances are you're talking too much. I know I do that a lot here. This journal filled with
words in and of itself could be the very thing blocking my mind, right brain, and pencil
from traveling across the page and getting some pencil mileage. I need to learn to shut up,
relax, and let my right brain (silent, visual, pictorial) and creative side take over. Without
words, art is painless. AND PORTABLE! You should let your sketchbook follow you
around. Now all I need to do is take my own advice. Words and talking and speech and
reading and writing are an artistic turn off.
So if I'm drawing in a room with a TV on, the TV needs to be on mute when I'm getting
started with my sketchbook.
That's pretty weird. It seems more people want to just attend conventions and skip ahead
to meet people who make comics official than do people who actually want to hand craft
and build their own comics series. Comics creators are outnumbered by rabid fans 600/1.
There.
Daily Sequential Art Production by 2 to 3 pages.
Daily Screenwriting, with notations
Saturday, October 20th, 2012,
I'm turning into a comic book innovator, but if we're being specific, I'm also turning out
to be an animation pre-production pioneer. I'm doing innovative things with animation
pre-production (writing and production design) that have never been done before. While
most writers of animation go for gags, slapstick humor, and squash and stretch in
America, I'm going for something a little more action-based, gothic, violent, dramatic,
and serious. Not to mention I'm not only a very action-drama oriented writer. I'm also a
very cinematic writer. I write all my episodes as though they were a Japanese or French
New Wave Feature Film.

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P a g e | 589

Chapter 10

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"The Black Blade"

Mono Jubei
JM Alberts

Elric of Melnibone
Michael Moorcock

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Sunday, October 21st, 2012,

My 1 supporter in my private life, Phil, is now officially out of my life. So without him,
and no friends, it's back to being Me vs. The World again. Going back to the old way of
doing things. I have no friends, and plenty of enemies, now that I think about it. Not that
I'm mean or a villain. Being a Nice Hero won't always make The World consider you its
friend either. This is a the life of a Loner. I live my life as a Reclusive Loner. I like it that
way. I like being neurotic. And manic. What does the class clown do after he graduates
and drops out of school. Nothing, probably.
Monday, October 22nd, 2012,
TAKING A SHORT LOOK BACK: Shows, People, Schools, Studios, and projects in
animation that also received coverage in Animation Magazine for the same month
Parallax did (July/August):

Regular Show
Black Dynamite
Annoying Orange
Total Drama: Revenge of the Island
LEGO Ninjago: Masters of Spinjitsu
Billy West
Kaijudo: Rise of the Duel Masters
Seth MacFarlane (Ted)
The Skechers Universe
Paranorman
School of Visual Arts (SVA)
The Art of Brave
Ice Age 4
Comic-Con 2012
Sin City: A Dame to Kill For
The Dark Knight Rises

This is all the stuff that was getting press and in the spotlight in animation for July and
August of 2012
That was for the July/August issue.

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For September, it was:

ParaNorman (cover)
Walt Disney Studios 2012 Original Animated Lineup
Rise of the Guardians
The Arab animation industry
Hayao Miyazaki
Shinji Aramaki & Starship Troopers Anime
Eric Fogel Article
October Issue:
Hotel Transylvania (cover)
Teenage Mutant Ninja turtles cartoon
How to Train Your Dragon
Toonami 2012
Randy Cunningham, 9th Grade Ninja
Brickleberry
Toon Goggles
Katsuhiro Otomo (online)

I may or may not be in the limelight, and I may or may not be an animation, anime, and
comics power player, but I've got a lot more work to do before I can ever say I've "made
it", I've "arrived" or I've "hit the big time". Everyone may be singing the song of my
name and overusing my handsome face, but are people even aware that's supposed to be
me? Doubt that one.
But now that my art has gotten some positive press (a press release, books, digital and
print comics, an ad and press coverage in Animag), somehow it feels easier to get started
drawing, now that my work is actually getting some mainstream approval. It's always
easier to work on your art if someone in the press or someone you know, a friend or
family member, approves it. I'd like to say it's easy getting hard, difficult, real comic
book work done without support from the industry. But it isn't. If the industry doesn't like
you or show support or approval, it's that much harder to get anything done work-wise.
In General, you want your pages of writing and art you create to be powerful. For
instance, in Akira Club, Mr. Otomo emphasizes with his thumbnails that at the time he

P a g e | 593

drew certain images in the Akira manga, he wanted to make the artwork "powerful" and
emphasized his desire to make the page(s) "make an impression"
Other key words Otomo has written to emphasize in his work: "Mass Destruction",
"Power Emphasized With A Circle" and "Giant".
Also, the Most Dense Layout, Thumbnail, and Page Award has got to go to Corey and
Otomo-Sensei. Otomo does a lot of dense, elaborate, powerful, cinematic pages, so
naturally and surprisingly enough, he puts a lot of page layout thumbs on each of his
pages as well much of the time. He's been known to put up to 18 page thumbnail layouts
on one page of paper. He taught me how to draw a lot of comic thumbnails on one page
for a lot of pages of sequential art. As a matter of fact, just this afternoon, I drew 8
miniature thumbnail layouts on one page, and it's all because of what Otomo-Sensei
inspired me to do. The more thumbnails you shove into your page, the more freedom it
will give you in terms of a wealth of art and drawing material to use for your comics and
manga books. 8 pages is half of an issue of your typical Jhonen Vasquez comic book, but
less than 1/20th of an Akira trade paperback. So it's all relative in reality.
I mean, sure, you CAN start off keeping it short, sweet, and simple by drawing 1 page
and one thumbnail for 1 image each day, but as your skills progress naturally you will
most likely branch out and expand to 8 sequential art layout thumbs on 1 page in 1 DAY,
once you get the hang of it and learn to make your pages and panels flow. That technique
isn't really so effective on the computer. It must be done by hand.
That settles it. From now on, I'm working on 8-10 miniature page layout and thumbnails
on a small scale on 1 page at a time, not just one or 2 pages of layouts at regular size. The
smaller the thumbs are, the more mileage I can get.
My new goal is to draw 8-11 miniature panel layouts, or the equivalent of 1 page of mini
panels, per day. So if I do 2 pages in one day, which would be around 20 thumbnail page
sketches, so far I've completed enough layouts to fill 1 entire 20 page issue with original
artwork. This issues layouts were laid out in less than 1 day on 2 separate sheets of paper.
The 10-Pages-In-1 Design & Drafting Technique. It's highly effective. There's so much
power in that technique, instead of producing 2 to 3 pages a month, I can produce 100s in
a few months or 1 year! And at the end of a decade, I'll have finished 1,000s of comic
book page layouts. It's getting easier. Visualizing the flow of pages, throughout space and
throughout a book or series or graphic novel, is important.

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How to Draw Comics, The JM Way!

Never just sketch a 1 page layout when you have the power and ability to sketch out
thumbnails of 10 pages in the same amount of space, just by drawing tiny thumbnails
instead of big ones. I've laid out 20 page in one day on 2 pieces of paper using this
technique. It's a trade secret of productivity and prolificacy.
The best thing about Animation Magazine and my 10-page a day work ratio, is the fact
that after a lot of time spent trying to master drawing comics, I'm haven't mastered the
art, but I am finally at peace with my independent comics and manga page production
rate. Mostly because I'm overshooting my page count. I'm over-delivering, as opposed to
under-delivering on my layout thumb page count. Having too few comic book pages
designed is indeed a good reason to fret over your career. Having too many pages
produced puts you at ease and peace. I worry a lot less now, and I'm not stressed at all.
I'm happy, spiritually and creatively.

Tuesday, October 23rd, 2012

Good morning.
Tuesday Soundtrack - Mystikal, "Edge of the Blade", Blade Trilogy Soundtrack Vol. 1
It's no secret. The hip-hop industry loves martial arts and action movies. ESPECIALLY
African-American ones like Blade and Afro Samurai. See Wu-Tang Clan etymology.
That's a very cool kind of lyricism and wordplay. I'd like to get it written on paper and
put it into printed word form.
Blade is one of main hip-hop oriented sword comics.
Honestly, if you ask me, sword movies and comics go well with both hip-hop and metal.
Along with drum & bass techno, and orchestral. Combine all 4 genres and you get a good
sense of my style.
To call Nicole, or not to call Nicole. That is the question. I miss that gurl. If that IS the
Nicole I knew at one point, she's definitely the same gurl.
What we have Now is All That We'll Ever Have.

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Film-Novel-Show-Animation-Comics Idea. Sports, Action, Science Fiction, Fantasy,

Adventure. Intergalactic Olympics, where what's at stake is nothing less than the
fate of the entire Universe. The series of Stories Takes Place on various planets,
where interplanetary light speed travel and Wormhole Teleportation is Also
Possible. This is how they travel from Arena to Arena to compete, both for the
glory of their homelands, but for their very lives.

Wednesday, October24th, 2012,

Been a while since I went to the old places I used to go to all day, every day: Megatokyo.
Adult Swim. DeviantART. Yahoo Mail.
But they drove me away, big time. With their nasty malicious stank assed Facebookporn
they WORSHIP and jack off to.

Thursday, October 25th, 2012

Barack Obama is my hero. He's one of the smartest multiracial people on the planet,
much like myself. Plus he cares about healthcare and the economy. I think he'll do fine
with the economy. Republicans don't impress me in that regard. Not one bit. They
couldn't do any better even if they wanted to.
OBAMA/BIDEN 2012
That's who I'd vote for if I was able to vote. Hopefully someone else will do the voting
for me. Would be a shame if they didn't.
Honestly, I haven't really been out and about in the world since I got big. I have no idea
what the local community really thinks of me or how they'd react to me.
Friday, October 26th, 2012,
Things to do:
Get Kickstarter Project Published (Bank Account, State I.D.)

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Financial Site List

Adsense
YouTube
Blogger
E*Trade
Kickstarter
Amazon
CreateSpace
Lulu
Webcomics Nation
BookTango

Sunday, October 28th, 2012,

There are some new, great websites emerging on the scene. That offer innovative new ways for
authors and/or producer, manga-ka, and animators to market and get support and funding for
their work, and I'm not just talking about Amazon, Twitter, and YouTube.
I'm talking about sites like Kickstarter, Scribd, Book Tango, CreateSpace, and Anipipo.
Crowdfunded books comics, anime, manga, films, and animation. Anything done in traditional
media has the potential to be crowdfunded and raise capital to make things easier on creators and
content providers, so they can make a living, not have to jump through so many corporate hoops,
build a fanbase and audience online and at trade shows, and generally make a living off of their
work with a smaller amount of struggle involved. It's not "Anime Rest In Peace" anymore. Sorry
Eric P. Sherman. It's "Corporate Anime Rest In Peace. Long Live Indie Internet Content and
Productions". If you can sign a patent contract through the internet, surely you can do the same
kind of contractual animation online for something less potentially hazardous, like animation and
anime. E-Contracts are fine. But it will eventually be necessary to read them all the way through.
From the way it looks, there will be more and more mainstream TV, broadcast, and content
publishing projects that all will have independent funding. I mean in the long run it will
eventually be funding. But crowd funding is good for people who don't have a large budget to
work with. We're talking about going from projects with a very small or nonexistent budget
expanding at a phenomenal rate of speed to projects with a mainstream size budget which has
been pledged by the audience itself that simply wants to see something actually get made and
happen. It's anyone's opportunity to support their favorite content producers, both big and small.
It's win-win. The audience is happy, and so are the authors, musicians, filmmakers, writers,
artists, staff, cast, crew, and creators.

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Potential Benefits from Crowdfunding: Lower cost; Less Expensive; Faster; Easier; Audience
can get involved and support project, unlike TV.
Crowdfunding, Social Media, PR, Web 2.0, Prosumerism, Content Distribution, Self-Publishing,
Print On-Demand, DVD Authoring, Video Engineering
Mono was inspired by a person I know. One of Mono's Mentors in Mystical Magic Arts will
essentially be another version of myself. He'll look like myself, and he'll be almost as powerful
as Mono Jubei.

Tuesday, October 30th, 2012,

#Sandy
Today was one of the best nights of my life. I got to interact with a real life indie anime company
stationed in Japan itself! What an honor! It felt like a real honor they took the time to answer my
inquiries. I even got them some extra stateside press coverage by notifying Animation Magazine
about them! It was great. They answered all my questions. I hope to do business with them when
they launch next year. My relationship with Japanese Anipipo has become that much stronger. It
happened on the same night as the Sandy Twitterstorm, too. I did no small amount of tweeting
on the elections and Sandy, too. Tweetanomicon. Not available on Facebook, bitch. Since my
brother loves Facebook, I HATE Facebook. Par to the course.
Ways to Publish-and-Promote Manga:

DeviantART
BookTango
Lulu
CreateSpace
Anipipo
WCN
Twitter
Blogger
YouTube

My artwork is good enough. It's professional looking enough for me to call myself a
professional. But is it anime-&-manga worthy? It's French-worthy obviously, but is it truly
actually Japan-Worthy. That's the highest kind of Worthy-Genius Level Artist there is. No easy
task living up to the Japanese standard of perfection. But if anyone can arise from the masses to

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do it, I can. I can at least try and give it my best shot. If I fail, I still win, because people will
remember my struggle. They'll always remember I tried.
Disney Acquired LucasArts/LucasFilm today, much in the same way they acquired Marvel a
year or few back. The bad according to most: It is Disney after all. So that's still up in the air.
The good?: We're getting a new Star Wars movie that ISN'T a prequel! Star Wars VII out of it in
2015. That's some big news. It's lighting up Twitterstorms like a Christmas Tree! One thing I
think we're all wondering about Star Wars VII (7) is who's gonna be in it, both in terms of
characters and actors. Will it be Old (First Trilogy), or will it be New (Extended Universe and
Prequel-associates), or a combination of both? And who's going to write and direct it? Lucas, or
someone he hires and trusts. Because Lucas does have a lot of good artists and writers at
LucasArts to choose from. If I wasn't going into [anime financing, maybe...] I'd be all over that!
New Friends:

Kickstarter
Steve Blum
Chris Prynoski
Faith Erin Hicks
Anipipo
Guardians Comic
Amazon
Ramin Zahed
Danielle Johnson
Animation Magazine
Twitter
Titmouse
Barack Obama
Michelle Obama
Maryanne Gaynor
Glendis Sorrell
Twitter Followers

I'm not just helping people on Twitter. I'm saving LIVES here. I'm preventing death and
destruction with the cure and solution of fast, real time instant, information. I'm earning giant
corporations billions in marketing, and saving companies billions of dollars. I help SO MANY
people on Twitter. Not to toot my own horn. I'm not the Savior of Humanity. That would be
Buddha, God, and Jesus. I'm just a guy who likes to write.

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Thursday, November 1st, 2012,

I've finally reached a level of background and foreground draftsmanship in my comic book pages
that I'm happy with, that I can draw without too much effort. I made this breakthrough yesterday
morning, on Halloween morning, or the 31st. Here's the initial production design illustration.
It has just the right Euro-esque amount of cartoon characters and layered dense realism in the background.
Very French in nature. Very Moebius-esque (R.I.P.). This is a sufficient enough level of detail that I don't
need to tamper with it too much. I just need more illustrations and sketches like it. The influences come
from Otomo, Moebius, DBZ, and Pokemon (TV). Now I just need to make EVERY panel's background
in my books as detailed as the mountain in this drawing.
One of my most trustworthy girlfriends rolls with the Suicide Girls indirectly, cuz that's how she rolls, tats
and all. How very Jen of her. Brilliant individuality, Nicole Cook. I like that woman. Maybe I'll call her.

Monday, November 1st, 2012,

Black & White film, Black & White Comics, Pen & Ink Art, Notan, Sci-Fi, Neo-Noir, and Goth are both
a cinematic and literary device, but certainly not a broadcasting one. It's an illustrative and filmmaking
style and technique. As far as TV is concerned "It discovered color a long time, and it's feeling a little too
self-indulgent to go back. So film, comics, and literature lend themselves to black and white.
Black and White Pen and Ink Artists:

Frank Miller
Todd McFarlane
Jim Lee
Joe Mad
Bruce Timm
Jhonen Vasquez
Renaissance
Ted Naifeh / Gloomcookie, Courtney Crumrin
Sin City
300
Mike Mignola
Jim Mahfood (Clerks, Zombie Kid
Bill Sienkiewicz
Stan Sakai
Aaron McGruder
Bill Watterson
Manga
Katsuhiro Otomo
Hiroaki Samura

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Yoshiyuki Sadamoto
Evan Dorkin
Terry Moore
Jeff Smith
Dave Sim
Jamie Hewlett
JM

In terms of those who have mastered spotting blacks, there's a limited number.

Friday, November 2nd, 2012,

I'm going to add a "Thank You" Section to Imaginomicon II, where I thank the first initial names of
people who contributed to the production of the book.
Surtr is one of the Keys to Mono's Inner-Outer Spiritual Power. His Fireblade is unconsciously linked to
Norse God Surtr's flaming blade. Norse Mythology in general, much like Expressionism, is awesome and
cool. I don't know if I'd call Surtr himself anime in nature, but he's epic in nature, and there's a lot of cool
illustrations out there hidden away in various places. So let's see: Recent Archetypes:

Surtr
Violence Jack
French Wikipedia
World Mythology
Maryanne's (My Birth Mother's) Fashion Design

I'm thinking of writing a [graphic] novel in Google Documents, WCN, or Blogger form, where each page
I post each month progresses the story on the spot. If I'm going to tell a narrative, it may as well be where
I hang out the most, which is Google and Webcomics Nation
Now that I've begun my little webcomics excursion, I've learned that you get the most work and
sequential art done when you work in a mode your comfortable with. From gridded paper to mechanical
pencils, to full page illustrations with speech bubbles. It really doesn't matter whether you're polished or
rough, pen or pencil or both. It's important to be productive, not to do it the "right way". There is no "right
way" to draw comics. All there is to work with is the mode of work your most comfortable with. If my
standard for drawing comics wasn't as obscenely high as it is, I'd probably have a lot MORE pages
completed in aid of my episodes and story.
I build masterworks for the centuries and decades. Classics. Not the days, weeks, months, and years.

Saturday, November 3rd, 2012,

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There. Finished the first 2 pages of my storybook. I'm modeling my work after Hipira by OTOMO

Vs.

I'm going to be drawing these two fighting, Mono with his Fireblade and the Robot with its fists and feet.
Now that my work is becoming more polished and publishable, I'm going to have to make a decision
whether I want to go the mainstream or independent auteur route. Do I still want to keep making small
little books for myself and maybe a few self-publishing readers, or will I want to market and publicize my
work, and submit it to more normal publishing venues?
I do have my share of comics-to-animation influences: Windsor McCay, Walt Disney, Osamu Tezuka,
Moebius, and more recently (in a sequential historic sense), Katsuhiro Otomo, Akira Toriyama, Todd
McFarlane, Jhonen Vasquez, Yoshiyuki Sadamoto, and Hiroaki Samura.
Much like Quentin Tarantino and the Wachowski Brothers in the medium of film, influences on my work
are just as key to the understanding of the context of my work as the work itself is, if you ask me. Those
guys are influences on my comics, too.
Privacy Measures

Step 1: Uninstall all Unneeded and untrusted software (batch uninstall)

Step 2: Back up hard drive using Carbonite
Step 3: Save Streaming Videos to CD Rom or Vimeo in private
Step 4: Save Internet Favorites
Step 5: Wipe the Ass of my Hard Drive and Cleanse it of any and all existing Security and
Privacy Threats. Destroy Leaks.
Step 6: Regain Privacy

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The latest electoral vote estimate from The Huffington Post has Obama at 277, Romney at 206.
Obama's definitely got the lead according to poll estimates so far.

Monday, November 5th, 2012,

Yay! Submitted my tech idea to Google today. My idea for a video data storage website, perhaps
of a Cloud variety. Or perhaps with a lot of Bandwidth.
According to ThinkHollywood.org, successful screenwriters with a great one of a kind script can
earn up to between $100,000 - $800,000. Per script in Hollywood.
Animation made by committee that's anime influenced, in terms of most of what we see hit the
air, isn't real art, and it isn't real anime. Compared to what I can do with comics on paper in my
own medium, it's shit. Parallax is a great series. Stuff like Bleach, Teen Titans, and Avatar,
compared to my own work, those guys are shit.
Tuesday, November 6th, 2012,
It's Election Day.
#pilot, #specscript, #Parallax, #Druidon, #Screenwriting
Great now I'm even putting @'s and #hashtags in my offline literary journals too! Hashtags and
the @name symbol have become a part of pop culture. Twitter's part of pop culture, to be
specific.
Twitter and Blogger are a writer's playground. And YouTube is a Broadcast Exec's and
Filmmakers playground.
I have a sordid history with AnimeTV and Webcomics Nation. Those two sites are really quite
questionable. The history of their treatment of me as a worker and creative individual hasn't been
the best. And their audiences are so tiny compared to the places I do get along with, like Twitter
and YouTube.
I definitely like being one of the 100 Most Powerful auteurs, entrepreneurs, and entertainers in
the world. I don't make it onto any power lists in the mainstream media, but does Steve Blum or
Sean Akins either. My point exactly. They're also very powerful, and they never get ranked,
either.
Using my savings, I'll be seeing Europe and CalArts in either 2013 and/or 2014.

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Wednesday, November 7th, 2012,

A round trip flight to and from Europe with me and a family member (2 tickets) (in economy
class) would cost around $3,000.
It's November 7th, the day after the Election, and Obama is now Re-elected, and I'm very happy
about it. Most people are happy about Obama's 2012 victory over arch political rival Mitt
Romney. Romney brought a lot of Money, Power, and Persuasion to the Table, but like most of
Twitter was saying, he's still no match for Obama, ESPECIALLY in terms of popularity and
voter diversity.
Florida is the Decider. Greeeat! Of all the Battle Ground States, much like in 2000, Florida is
taking the longest to get its shit together due to lack of support and the 2012 Romney voting
scandal in Florida.
All in all the Re-Election Campaign had it's scary moments, and its moments of triumph. And I
was there to see and contribute to all of it through donating to the Obama Re-Election Campaign,
subscribing to the Obama Official Website Newsletter and through Twitter.
Thursday, November 8th, 2012,
I smell money cookin'!
In terms of manga-ka that emerged from America, there's Me, Piro of Megatokyo, and NyankoChan. Maybe Felipe Smith, Svetlana, and Jared Hodges. I'd say readers know who we are.
Everyone else is a virtual unknown. Publishing in print and webcomics is sort of a rite-ofpassage for OEL manga-ka.
Friday, November 9th, 2012,
Genres I've Surpassed in Terms of Artwork

Indie Comics
American Animation
Adult Swim

Genre's I'm Even With

DC
Marvel Comics
Image Comics
Dark Horse Comics
Viz
Tokyopop

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Manga
Superheroes
Pulp Fantasy Novels (Illustrator)

Artists Who Surpass Me

French Comics
Anime
Franime
Todd McFarlane
Corey Jackson
Moebius
Toonami
Katsuhiro Otomo
Ghost in the Shell

Fellow Sword Anime

Claymore
Afro Samurai
Samurai Champloo
Sengoku Basara
Kenshin
Karas I & II
Zelda
Final Fantasy VII
Devil May Cry
Blade of the Immortal
Star Wars: The Clone Wars
Samurai Jack
Bleach

Man, FUCK Webcomics Nation. Fuck that site. Up the ass and all the way to hell. They didn't do
JACK SHIT for my career. The site sucks. It has the worst image uploading system I've ever
seen in my life. Fuck it to hell!
I'm through with webcomics. I can't believe I was gullible enough to believe Jamie S. Rich when
he said "webcomics get you published in print..." No they don't! They don't do jack shit, other

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than open you up to more than a few lifetimes of criticism. At this point, I'm quitting Webcomics
Nation. That site thinks its above listening to its contributors. The arrogance and pretention of it
all, these rip-off artists, makes me sick. FUCKING HATE IT!!!! From now on my art's going
back to being a secret kept off the computer. The more art I upload and scan, the less I draw.
And I don't want to get famous from comics. I really just care about drawing. And I don't need
computers for that. I never have. Computers are for promoting, NOT Creating.

I can make my art match my writing. There is a method to producing over 365 or more pages a
year. Draw 1 page of art/sketches/illustrations/designs/comics pages a day, every day, for 10
years. I've already applied the 10,000 Hour Rule to Manifesto. Now I need to Apply the 10,000
Hour rule to End Times and Art: Manifested, or Comics, or Sketchbook. As long as I do a little
bit, or a lot of drawing a day every day, I'll be able to match the Density of Manifesto.
The secret to producing an art version of Manifesto's Volumes I and II in the next 10 years
comes down to 2 main things: Drawing without hesitation, and the 10,000 hour rule. Just keep
my art page and comic book page rate production rate proportional to my Hypergraphia Journal
rate and I'll be just fine. That way I can keep the page count between my art and my writing on
an even level. Just make the page count for each day match for the most part, or make my daily
page count of my artwork surpass the page count of my journals.
In the last 2 years I've done around 300 pages of artwork. I estimate I could double that amount.
Sure it's about power and detail in my art, but it's not so much about powerful, dense, and
detailed drawings and compositions as it is about shortening the running distance between my
digital journals and my sketchbooks and compilations. As long as I keep my page output
amongst the two mediums (drawing/writing), I'll be just fine. I could even reach another 2,000
pages of new art in the future by as soon as 2022, 10 years from now. A job would be nice, but
as long as I have a fat stack of art papers, and most of them are secret and safe from the computer
or webcomics, I'll be happy. Privacy = Productivity.

Saturday, November 10th, 2012,

Filled my "art sketch page quota" for the day. Not bad. Around 2 pages of decent sketches. One
is Yu-Gi-Oh-ish, and the other is END TIMES Cover-ish. Not a bad haul.
I blog and tweet daily almost every day. But that's not all...
On top of all that...

I keep a daily journal log

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And a daily art sketchbook log

So far I've been pretty faithful to updating these 4 platforms.

"Every Day Brings A New Drawing and Page."
-J.M.
Some of my fellow artists in the art community think I'm one of the best production designers
and perspective-based artists that ever lived. Well, some of the time. SOME of my drawings in
the last few years have perspective-based depth-of-field. My best ones maybe. But not most of
my work. I'm not happy with a lot of my old work. A lot of my old work feels flat (to me). I
appreciate and relish perspective more often than I'm able to actually draw it currently. Rulers
will help me, and so will a 1-point, 2-point, and 3-point perspective grid I'm going to see if I can
convince Donna to help build me.
Probably some of the best working indie comics artists I've noticed lately,
from the 2000-2002 new school golden era of pen and ink independent comic
books, would have to be Ted Naifeh, Jason Alexander (Queen & Country), Frank
Miller, and Dan Brereton. Their compositions are a bit fuller and more tight
and fleshed out than most (if not all) published independent comics artists
working today. In terms of inking, spotting blacks, and black and white or
quasi-colored composition, they're among the very best, good enough to rival
even Japanese and Korean manga-ka. My work takes influence from all the
following parties of black and white (and sometimes painted) Notan-based
comics: Neo-Noir, Goth, and Experimental American Comics, Franco-Belgian
Comics, and Chinese, Korean, and Japanese manga. I'm making an effort to take
the strongest aspects from each of these genres and mediums of comics, and
pull out my own style which integrates elements from all of them: The Notan
and Noir-Goth-Influenced Black-Spotting of American Books, The Perspective,
Line Quality-Weight, Design, and Architecture of French artists like Moebius
and Enki Bilal (and titles like Blacksad), and the dynamic and well timed and
narrated storytelling techniques (speed lines, combat poses, weapons, page
layouts, panel compositions) of pan-Asian manga from Japan, Korea, and China.
Got around 19 pages worth of tiny thumbnails completed on 2 sheets of graph
paper, which I'm keeping in my manila comics folder of more polished and
tight pages. Will be tackling those later.

Sunday, November 11th, 2012,

My daily drawing practice, and habitual training routine definitely favors incrementalism over stamina
and virtuosity. I believe in doing a little bit or short bursts of productivity no more than one or a few times
a day.
The power of incrementalism is the entire reason I am able to be an author of any kind of book in the first
place. I stuck with it as a daily routine. And that daily routine ended up writing the manuscripts for me.
It's like incrementalism and my subconscious habitual practice is my ghostwriter. Half the time it doesn't

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even feel like I'm the one doing all this work. And yet, I am. Who else could it be that's this prolific? No
one of my own current generation and very few of previous generations.
I will never forget the first online royalty payment I ever recieved (2012), the first only royalty paycheck I
got paid, and cashed in (mostly for a junk food meal) I'll never forget that meal for as long as I live.
That's the most satisfying meal I've ever had, purely because I earned it through hard honest work I
WANTED to be doing for a job, and not money made off of hand outs from the government or my
parents' health care system, or a day job I was growing to strongly dislike. Midway through 2012 was the
first time I ever got a royalty check for doing a job I love. And online nonetheless.
Wasn't watching TV or online pretty much at all today, or in the morning or evening. Too busy reading
my new book sitting on a couch for 11 hours straight. I read the book twice actually, in less than 48 hours.
God I love reading. I'm finding new ways to make a habit out of it. It's the perfect substitution for bad TV
and internet media. Honestly, I just like reading. I know there's plenty of Wikipedia articles out there, but
I love reading the old fashioned way too, which is to say something not written by me and not written on
a computer, but printed in a book instead.
Dark Fantasy Writers:

H.P. Lovecraft
Edgar Allen Poe
Michael Moorcock
M. Night Shyamalan
Alfred Hitchcock
Stephen King
Neil Gaiman

SF Writers

Isaac Asimov
Stephen King
Philip K. Dick
H.G. Wells

Tuesday, November 13th, 2012,

Am finally getting around to turning Manifesto into a website. Only 185 more chapter uploads to go!
Should have this epic upload completed sometime in the next 6 months. But in the meantime I need to
find something to write about.
It almost seems like most people only care about what I am now and what I'm doing currently, not what I
have done or what I will do. That's an odd way to be judged, yet it seems to be turning into the norm.
Fans only care about the now, the present. No one cares about the past or future. I care about the future.

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I'm not going to be focusing on my "career" as much in the next 5 years. I'm getting a License and a onename bank account, and I'll be putting savings money away for certain things: Long term goals: Travel,
Transportation around the country and planet, and MAYBE (if I'm lucky) one day returning to animation
trade school and founding my own studio online and elsewhere. Maybe Glomera will accept American
dollars and get the FUCK out of "beta mode" (i.e. "production hell") by then. If you can't find work, but
have a savings account, travel. Good way to pass the time.
I've never felt so lost. All of my power and influence comes from computers and the internet. It's
misplaced and misdirected power, because it's not actually being harnessed properly or put towards a
profit-based goal. So it's useless in a business sense, even IF everyone wants to take it by force, or hijack /
steal it, and believe me, they do. They all want my power the internet and computers have given me. It's
just an army of people trying to strip me of my coolness and power rank, pulling rank on me, trying to
shove me off of my throne and cloud, trying to seize power from me, by "violent siege if necessary".
Apparently they think violence and hostility are important parts of seizing power from their newfound
enemy. It's been one person after another trying to "seize my assets" time and time again.

Business Shifts and Changes:

Currently, this year, there are 10 billion devices connected to the internet in 2012.
In 8 years, that number is expected to multiply by 10 to 50 billion devices connected online in 2020.

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Chapter 11

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Wednesday, November 14th, 2012,

Just got an official email from Anipipo. If Anipipo is free, I'll definitely offer up my concept for their site.
I have many bosses. My newest boss is Anipipo CEO Hiroaki Taira of Tokyo, Japan. I know Hiro-san is
hard at work getting all the pieces in place for Anipipo, so I'm not all that worried about not succeeding.
As long as Anipipo staff work hard on their website and business, I'll work hard at developing Mono's
world. But what will I call my site on Anipipo, the anime crowdfunding site? I think that might make
Hiro and a few others not only my bosses, but the producers of my anime co-production work as well.
I'm one of the first American producers of animation to be involved at an early level in anime
crowdfunding. Crowdfunding is a cheap and efficient way to build a demo reel and portfolio of Asianbased animation with your name on it. If you accomplish producing a 3-5 minute pilot of anime the way
French Producer / Creator Auteur Thomas Romain did with Oban Star-Racers, you're really that much
further ahead in your career. Anipipo is but one of the new ways to get animation produced, funded, and
animated.
Anipipo is a very Japanese site, but the great thing about it is, you don't need experience or to be Japanese
to participate. I'm sure those things help, but the production website is really about building a pan-Asian
animation production with limited resources.
Hopefully when Anipipo is completely built it will let people like me pitch their ideas and submit them to
a primarily Japanese audience, and lead to crowdfunding and future employment as a concept artist,
writer, and designer.
I'm not one to brag, but honestly, I feel like I'm building and constructing an entirely new field of anime
and animation production between the U.S. and Japan, that's structured somewhat differently than the 2
main methods of anime production: Corporate TV/Film Production and Co-Production. The thing is, even
if you're doing crowdfunding, there's a good likelihood you'll still get a high caliber of attention to design
and drafting detail. It takes a lot of work. Even if it's produced by people like Anipipo, there's still going
to be a lot of work and manpower involved. A lot of work is involved in anime to keep the production
values, quality, and art standards so high.
Mono of the Apocalypse
A Short Film

Genre of film being animated: TV Pilot / Short Film / Anime

Length: 3-7 Minutes
Genre of Content: Action, Drama, Movie
Broadcaster: YouTube, Williams Street, Titmouse
Work Done on My Part: Literary Bible, Lead Character Design, Script, Concept Art
Characters: Mono, Krin, Jen, Jin
Executive Producers, Co-Producers: Anipipo, JM, JM Animation, Chris Prynoski
Created by: JM
Budget: 400k

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Schedule: 9 months

Things to keep in mind:

I'm an American
I don't have experience other than AnimeTV and Animation Magazine
I'm working with Anipipo's budget
There's a Japanese-English language barrier
I don't have connections in Japan...yet, well other than Anipipo
A production crew has yet to be established

I'm not letting any of these elements slow me down. I'm pretty sure Anipipo is anticipating complications
in the productions they fund. Not surprising. Problems and complications are part of the animation
process. All I can ask is that they keep them in mind, and plan accordingly.
I work with Japanese artists with the utmost respect for them and their craft in mind. I welcome artists,
both male and female, young and old, in Japan.
According to a most recent email Hiro-san (CEO of Anipipo) is currently in the process of looking all
over town to find studios to source animation projects to. Sounds good to me.
My Production Strategy is this:

Create Pre-Production like an Indie Comic and Manga

Produce and Animate like a Japanese Feature Film
I prophecy and foresee my own success.
I build and foresee my own success in my own future
I build and create my own miracles

We psychics and visionaries are the key to our own future.

I'm a Discover of Things. I'm a Discoverer. The Discoverer.
Most of my franchise, fortune, and empire will be built primarily on foundations I discovered myself,
which I either invented myself from scratch, or uncovered like diamond in the rough.
Discover. Build. Market. Profit.
I'm starting to feel like the Windsor McCay of American-Japanese anime co-production.
If I ever do succeed at my real ambitions and end up in a comfortable position where I stop being put at
risk and financial jeopardy like I have been, who knows. I might just retire blog and YouTube channel.
They're not going to last forever.
My "series" is pretty much just a sales pitch presentation for a Tokyo-based anime series TV franchise for
adults along the same lines as Ghost in the Shell and Cowboy Bebop. That's all I ever intended it to be.

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Not a webcomic. Not a screenplay. Not a graphic novel. An anime series co-production pitch, meant to
be sold to an anime studio for development and research, or presented at MIPCOM as a Euro co-pro.
There. Feels good to get that out of my system. That's my secret. It's really just a sales pitch for an
animated TV series, because that's my favorite medium aside from indie comics.

Thursday, November 15th, 2012,

My 29th birthday is a day and a half away, but as far as I'm concerned, I'm already in my early 30s,
because 3 decades of existence feels like well over 30 by now.
I have faith in my vision. I have faith that Hiro-san as a CEO will surpass a certain low grade swindler. I
have faith that Anipipo will know enough about animation production and being a producer. I have hope
they know as much about making anime and animation in reality as I do, online and anywhere else. You
don't go into the animation business as a CEO unless you A) Know something about how to produce
animation, and B) You know the right people, whether it's in Japan, or America, or both. I'm willing to
step in if need be. I'm an expert on YouTube and YouTube video publishing. If you're going to build a
media brand, you don't just need Asia. You need YouTube and access to production houses as well.
Friday, November 16th, 2012,
Current whereabouts? Around my house, preparing for my birthday tomorrow. I'm also having a current
email correspondence with a supervising producer (Ben) for the poplar animation studio production house
Titmouse Inc. He sent me an email in response to my first email saying I should tell him what kind of
things I have in mind for my show idea. It's tough to fathom I'm actually able to submit Parallax as a
show idea to the same studio that animated Metalocalypse, Avatar The Last Airbender, Motorcity, Randy
Cunningham, Afro Samurai, Black Dynamite, and Megas XLR! That's quite the portfolio they have. I
hope they are interested in developing my idea. My most famous fantasy series concept, I might add.

Saturday, November 17th, 2012,

Birthday is today. I got some cool art books for presents. Pop culture art books.
Currently, I'm in open correspondence with two different animation production operations: Anipipo, a
crowdfunding anime site worth $1.4 million, which is for new creators, which is in Tokyo, Japan. And
I'm also corresponding with Ben, a Los Angeles-based supervising producer over at Titmouse, Inc., a
studio built by Chris Prynoski that primarily does television animation and anime influenced shows. I'd
prefer not to have to choose between the two. I'd like to work with both of them all the time, to be quite
honest. I'm in the formative stages of my relationship with these companies and studios.

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Sunday, November 18th, 2012,

Enemies?

Bryan Johnston: Gun brandishing, OS-hacking, fat sociopath murderer with a chip on his
shoulder, who hates everyone and repels girls.
Viacom (Nickelodeon and Comedy Central): Corporate raiders and thieves. Greed-worshipping
big business evil. Stole my identity and put it on TV. Trying to interfere with my life/profits.
Sumner Redstone: Leader of Viacom. Corporate sociopath. Promotes said despicable corporate
behavior and hates me and many others. Crushes creativity in the corporate workplace
NBC: Corporation that slanders and hates me. Manufactures fake news articles with my likeness.

Other problems I've fought against:

Clones, Art Plagiarists, and Forgers

Brother
Neighbors
Racism
Bullies
Hurricanes
Cyberstalkers
Douchebag Hollywood and TV
Anime Fans
The Japanese Elite
My Own Reputation
Evil Journalists
Mudslingers
Groupies
The Feds
The Mafia
The Medical Community
Florida
Famous TV Personalities like Jay Leno
That's pretty much all I have to say about the Villains of my life story. For now.

Maybe I should write about something a little more positive. Networks seem to be trying to be some
forced brand of "silly" nowadays, in an effort to entertain the younger demographic, especially cable
companies. It's not working out very well, in terms of CN, Disney, and Nick.

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The truth about writing and drawing? It's not the easiest thing in the world to write a 600 page graphic
manga novel, when you have someone as evil as Bryan Johnston cyberstalking you, and trying to
Humiliate slander/kill you. Unfortunately Bryan Johnston is the kind of guy who likes to intimidate
people and win by fear and bullying. To say nothing of him trying to manipulate the media through the
internet. That's a lot of exterior stress to survive so I can draw comics. The HR Nerd From Hell. If I'm
John Lennon (which I'm not), Bryan's "a regular Mark David Chapman".
My life would be easier if I didn't have any rivals and enemies, socially or business wise. But
unfortunately the option of having no enemies doesn't seem to exist now. Adults have enemies. Children
have friends and family. He's sending police cars to the comic shop now?

Okay, I've completed the spec script for my pilot. Episode 1, First Draft of Parallax. Now it's a matter of
deciding what I want to do next. Am I going to refine the pilot, or am I going to begin drafting Episodes
2-12? Or Am I just going to submit what I've already got to Ben @ Titmouse, Inc., the main guy who can
help my script become something. Having a working relationship with Chris Prynoski and Titmouse Inc.
could change everything about my life. It could make my work the real deal. Real, paid and sold
television work! What's more exciting than that? Not much.
The thing I really like about Titmouse is, they don't pull any punches. They're proud to work in the anime
style, and anything they do with J.M. Animation pretty much is anime. Titmouse has worked on lots of
anime styled stuff: Diablo III: Wrath, Motorcity, Avatar: The Last Airbender, Black Dynamite, Megas
XLR, and GI Joe Resolute. They seem to do their best anime when teamed up with J.M Animation in
South Korea
For a long time I wasn't aware Titmouse DID the newest GI Joe animated film: Resolute. I just assumed
JM Animation was solely responsible for it. Finding out Titmouse (the same studio I might be submitting
my work to) was somehow involved in the production, was just icing on the cake! I love how cinematic
their animation is, how detailed a lot of it is, and how progressive their philosophy and writing is.
I always intended for my project to have an "anime feel to it" even if it was an American show. And I
wanted it to be mature, violent, and gory, and yet cinematic and mythological and archetypal at the same
time. Like Lord of the Rings meets Ghost in the Shell. Just something almost indescribably cool. I'm
perfectly okay with the pre and post production being done in Korea, and not Japan. Even if Japan doesn't
animate my project, but Korea does, Korea is the Number 1 Asia-based animation powerhouse for
bringing in anime-esque post production. With Titmouse, I would kind of assume we at Titmouse would
take care of the Writing, Voice Acting, Pre-Production Producers and Directors, Storyboard Art,
Production Design, Concept Art. Color/Light & Shade Design, CGI, Character Design, Prop Design, Ink
and Paint, Sound Editing, Editing, and Key Frames. Then they'd source the material to Korea for touch
ups and post production like animating the footage more fully. All the really designy concept art will be
plucked from my archives. I'll give the team something to work with artwise, so the animators will have
something to animate, the character designers can design the models, and the storyboard artists will have
something to storyboard.

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I spend most of my time searching for, and establishing, some kind of a delicate balance and general
balancing act between my home life and career, or "work life". Balancing the two successfully without
getting exhausted halfway through is a chore and a challenge.

Wednesday, November 21st, 2012,

I have a resolution for next year, and the rest of this year. Become proficient at drawing color, CGI,
Wacom Tablet, Photoshop, painting, and Acrylics Effects Design and Lighting and Darkness Design.
Fire, Water, Air, Earth, Wind, Clouds, Smoke, Explosions, Beacons of Light, Light Beams and Light
Rays. I will attempt to draw all of these things and more, and probably put not a single one of them
online. I'll also be dabbling in Photoshop and mixed media. I'll probably paint over certain photoshop
printouts, or Photoshopping over some acrylic and gouache paintings.
Peter Chung's Comics Storytelling: Do's and Don'ts

Avoid Running Commentary, especially in the form of interior monologue of main character,
which makes drawings seem gratuitous. A hindrance to smooth reading, since the text seems
complete without pictures.
Avoid self-analyzing your story with words AS you tell it. That would mean you don't trust your
reader to get the point.
Do stage events so readers can figure out the point of the characters through clues of behavior,
rather than through direct pronouncements of a character's thoughts.
Avoid Nonstop Action, Glamour Posing, or a Fetishistic Emphasis on Anatomy
Avoid unclear geography and leaving out backgrounds
Avoid Leaving Out Pacing. Pacing always must be graspable and strong
Don't only draw what you enjoy and leave out everything you do not. It detracts from the story.
Do collect comics and study and copy the techniques of your favorite artists
Do read the stories in the comics you buy, not just look at the art

Friday, November 23rd, 2012,

I'm meeting my 1 drawing a day requirement. Enough said. I can now manage one drawing a day pretty
easily. It's getting easier. Give me a portable drafting board, and a spiral notebook, and I'm good to go.
Speaking of Art,
My drawing abilities are improving. I can definitely see a difference emerging from the drawings I do
now and the drawings I used to do.
Drawings I do nowadays show a certain structural improvement over earlier efforts. Drawings I do now
have much more of a structured feel to them, which is good. Because I've studied anatomy, my designs
have a structured feel about them.

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I'm kind of a cyborg machine, when it comes to writing. I got my system set on automatic, and even if the
world ended tomorrow, I'd still be outputting an ocean of electrons and words the next day. I'm on
autopilot, either fortunately or unfortunately. My habitual drawing behavior is getting better.

Saturday, November 24th, 2012,

Powers:

I invented YouTube's streaming of copyrighted material function

I can market any anime, manga, animated series, comic, writer, company, or artist successfully
I can get anything on my computer on a TV screen
I can turn a TV into a computer screen
I can manufacture low budget literature and home electronics
I can create a TV series, comic book, and book, bound, and everything
I influence the most influential people in the world

Progress:
Turns out 2.4 billion people in 6 different continents worldwide are online at any given time each day.
And Google and YouTube make up an enormous percentage of that usage.
That's more than half as much as TV's total worldwide current broadcasting audience of 4.5 billion or so
Eventually the audience of the internet will match and surpass the audience size of TV within the next 40
years. TV is on its way to computer dependence, and undeniable obsolescence.
One day more people will use websites than ever will TV. We're already starting to see it all headed in
this direction already. Things are not looking good for non-digital TV.

Sunday, November 25th, 2012,

Currently trading a lot of emails with StonerGoth187, Ramin Zahed, and Ben. And then there's my
Wikiographer, Jay Meyers. They're my current online friends. I can always count on them for honest info
and support.
Titmouse really has given me the hookup. Things are looking promising between Parallax and Titmouse.
I have complete faith in Titmouse as an anime studio, to deliver a quality anime-style action animation
production. I've got to decide a few things first though, like the role I want Titmouse to play, and what I
want to utilize their studio for. Ideally I like to sell the script and series concept art bible to them, and
fulfill the role of a creative consultant or producer, as Titmouse and JM Animation covers production
duties, unless they want me to play a more hands-on role. I'll be as involved in the projects realization and
manifestation into reality as a TV Show as Titmouse wants me to be. Which could be a lot. I might even
have the honor of being involved in budgeting and scheduling decisions: Signs of a real bona fide
animation producer.

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But when my show does finally get made, if so, it would appear that the typical Titmouse superstar
creator often has a net worth somewhere in the neighborhood of $10 - $12 million. That's how much
Aaron McGruder and Brendon Small have earned off of their brainchildren The Boondocks and
Metalocalypse. But Metalocalypse has been through 4 Seasons. The Boondocks, 3 seasons (so far).
Speaking of Bling, Wheels, Real Estate, and Money, I simply CAN'T WAIT to by that $2.3 million
mansion in the Hollywood Hills, or the Greater Los Angeles Metropolitan area. By then I'll be taking
more showers and dieting.
Dave Sim and Todd McFarlane; and my Journals = Tank, High Influence, High Power, High Energy
My Art Style and Content = Functioning at a lower Power, but Higher Energy, Social Power Wavelength
With Todd and Dave, all people care about from them is the big things for the most part.
I'm a move visible internet and media celebrity, so with me, people pay attention to the small details.
My bigger details don't get credited as much, especially not directly to me.
Dave and Todd sprint 10 miles, which they do in art terms, and no one lifts a finger or gives a damn. They
have that freedom in their life and work.
I'm closer to a real celebrity and business mogul and media personality, meaning the public is very
conscious about my body language, presence, and vision.
They get a lot more mileage out of doing 10s more work. They're probably more conservative and
atheletic.
I get more mileage out of minimalism, out of doing less, purely because I'm the most famous.

Wednesday, November 28th, 2012,

Went to the place that's kind of like a state office and DMV, except a lot nicer mostly. Decided to get my
new State I.D. today. And therefore I also had to get a photo taken. I did not smile. Not bad. Also, I was
going to shave my beard finally, but I left it on my face for 3 days, purely BECAUSE I wanted my I.D.
photo show my beard. I'm sick of people thinking I don't have a beard.
I fucking HATE when people leave out my beard.
Now, the next thing I'm doing is starting my own savings account, and getting a new bank card. It's gonna
kick my old card's ass.
When you're an adult, you have to do these things. You have to get an I.D. and credit card, especially if
you're in business for yourself, as I am.

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That aside, I bought a book on moving to Canada. I'm studying to one day be an expatriate. For reals.
Maybe in Canada, maybe not. Either way I'll spend a large amount of time outside the country. Probably.
Maybe forever. I certainly won't miss where I live currently.
I definitely sense a rivalry between Phil and Chris Prynoski. I kind of know and knew them both at one
point. Ever since the School of Visual Arts and Beavis and Butt-Head over at 90s MTV. They kind of
went completely seperate ways once SVA and the first Beavis & Butt-Head series was over, Prynoski got
credit on screen, and Phil didn't if my suspicion is correct. From that point on, the rivalry just grew. Is that
really how it is? If I'm talking to 1 I'm not allowed to interact with his rival. Those guys are really very
cliquish in some ways.
Thursday, November 29th, 2012,
Things to buy with that sweet, sweet Parallax money,

Website Subscriptions
Anime DVDs
Hollywood Movie DVDs
Asian Kung-Fu and Cinema DVDs
Anime Art Books
Indie Comics Trades
Novels
Art Books
Music CDs
Art Supplies

When my favorite anime and manga artists re-interpret my work, as they tend to do, from Otomo to
Yasuhiro Nightow, they're enhancing my artistic reputation, as a draftsman and as a designer. It's a huge
honor to see them appear so inspired by me. They're real life introverted geniuses, and I love and
appreciate all their contributions, whether it's at Titmouse, DA, or in the manga publishing world. I want
to be gracious and humble about their kind interpretations. I don't want to rub it in the public's face.

Thursday, November 29th, 2012,

When I get my S.S. money, I'm buying a PSP (Playstation Portable) and Norah's psychic reading famous
people get.
Am I influenced by most modern manga? Hardly. Modern manga retailers in Japan these days are so
deprived of the modern day Katsuhiro Otomos and Hiroaki Samuras. I log onto Japanese Amazon, and all
I see is sexy girl manga, or really perverted hentai, or eloquent boy's love or Yaoi. Nothing like what I'm
used to in the states. It's all very naughty. It left me high and dry. Where is all the ACTION and Manly
Martial Arts Comics I wondered. Does Japan even make real action comics anymore. Shows and studios
like Avatar: The Last Airbender, Teen Titans, The Boondocks, and Titmouse have got Japan's comic

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books beat in the contemporary action department, hands down. I guess all this isolation from Japanese
society left me blind to the reality of it. That most Japanese manga nowadays is just porn!

My producer boss, Ben Kalina at Titmouse L.A., is kind of very much an animation and production
strategy GENIUS! He KNOWS how to plan animation out from start to finish. Though he's hard to get a
hold of in his office, he's so efficient at production logistics and tactics it's scary! He's the most ingenious,
precise, and efficient animation producer I know.
Really good animation producers are the unsung strategic masterminds and super-geniuses of animation
planning and production. I always thought good animation producers were smart. I didn't know they were
geniuses!
There are plenty of places to live in Canada.
British Columbia, Victoria, Vancouver, Alberta, Edmonton, Calgary, Saskatchewan, Regina, Saskatoon,
Manitoba, Winnipeg, Brandon, Ontario, Toronto, Ottawa, Quebec, Quebec City, New Brunswick,
Prince Edward Island, Newfoundland, Labrador, Yukon. Other than all that, there's the Northwest
Territories, and Nunavut.
There's also the whole Universal Health Care thing. And the cold weather.
It's the Great White North. It would be at least worth visiting for a bit of time.
My favorite countries outside of The U.S. would be Canada, Japan, China, Britain, and France.
I'd definitely like to see Toronto, Ontario, and Quebec. Canada has Regions, Towns, and Cities. Not
states.

Saturday, December 1st, 2012,

Now that I've had time to think about it, I'm not so sure I want the online social scene to be a part of my
private and personal life. I'm not really interested in making the people I see online a part of my social
reality. I like my private life the way it is. My friends and family are perfect the way they are. I have no
desire to upgrade or replace that.
Will power and desire alone aren't enough to make a 6,000 page series and graphic novel series happen
the way Cerebus, Tezuka, and Akira did. Books like that are only possible when the artists is receiving
support in some way, like they already have fans, they have funding, they have family and friends, or they
already have an established career. I may WANT to accomplish those impossible superhuman feats, but
because my resources are limited, it wouldn't happen early in my career, and probably wouldn't happen
until I got a lot older, if at all.

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No matter how much I may WANT TO achieve success and completion of my graphic novel, if I don't
start succeeding commercially and fame wise more than I have, my book will never be completed. It will
never be completely even if I want to complete it more than anything else in the world. Because the
support and resources, are not there. I'm just going to have to learn to accept that I've got better things to
do with my time than pursue an impossible, godlike, superhuman dream.

Sunday, November 2nd, 2012,

I'm autonomous. Therefore, I don't fear death or danger so much as I fear (on a very deep level) situations
where I don't have any real control, whether they're in my own home or anywhere else. I don't LIKE
people who want to take away my control, or who treat me like I don't have any control, or who don't
WANT me to have control. I despise them all.
It's damn near impossible to write-illustrate a 600-page-long epic graphic illustrated novel of the Blankets
variety. It can be done relatively painlessly the way I did it with journal entries, in small increments and
doses, but the truth is, no one has that kind of momentum, unless it's sporadic momentum, small(er)
books and chapters that are between 20 to 200 pages. All long narratives are made of chapters,
installments, episodes, and volumes or "tomes". One must never forget that: The fact that longer
narratives don't and never will exist without existing in a structure of compiled and combined mininarratives. To get one LONG, REALLY LONG story arc, the only way you're going to get there is
through short daily episodes of work. This isn't so much a trade secret as it is a matter of fact about how
authors of illustrated fiction compose and build longer narratives. You have to take on work you can
handle. Work with 1 to 10 pieces of artwork per day, or 2 to 8 layouts of sequential art a day.
Whatever creative level I'm functioning at now, exists as a level where I'm not allowed fun, pleasure, and
joy in my life, or the spending of money, and a level when drawing well is discouraged (by my fake
father).
I don't really fear danger, loneliness, injury, dirtiness, poverty, and death. Not half as much as I fear not
having control over my own career and life. I'll admit it. I'm VERY afraid of not having money or control
State I.D.
Cash
Savings Account
Debit Card
Deposit into
Account This leads to:

Financial Status
Online Payments

Well, things seem to be looking up for me. I'm on the verge of a breakthrough with my work and have
gotten noticed by an important animation producer in Los Angeles, and as a result, I'm not depressed and
fatigued anymore.

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Scratch that. Things are only KINDA looking up for me, but I'm still in an overall better position than
before.
Ben thanked me for my persistence in pursuing a working relationship with Titmouse and my
consideration of them, but ultimately he said something to the tone of "unfortunately we are not
developing new content at this time" I took the rejection surprisingly well. I didn't really overreact or
anything, because I know I'll be all right. Hearing "Not Interested" from a producer isn't the end of the
world. I'll just keep doing my current thing, my tech, comics, and freelance thing.
Eh, I'll manage I suppose. Probably. Looks like Titmouse is out, and it's back to being just me, Anipipo,
and Kickstarter with the potential sequel to my first e-book. Well, that, Adsense, and my savings of social
security and allowance each month (SS is $150, Allowance is 4 payments of $20 each week for 1 month),
that brings me to a total monthly payment of $230/month.
If I don't spend anything
I earn $230/Month
x 12 months =
$2,760/year (Computer)
$13,800/5 years (Trip overseas, or up North)
$27,600/10 years (New Car)

Tuesday, December 3rd, 2012,

I'm better at analyzing and accumulating / managing money and business expenses than my parents ever
tend to give me credit for.
I used an ATM machine for the first time ever today. Deposited 2 paychecks and some cash.
And after I finished using the ATM, turns out I have a total of $105 in my bank account and on my debit.
I'm buying a PSP with it....sooner or later.
On the plus side, my relationship with both money and the Los Angeles animation industry is improving.
New Terms that have emerged: Wiki, Wikipedia, Google, YouTube, Twitter, Facebook, blogging.
I wasn't aware paychecks could be deposited digitally, into an ATM and onto a credit card until just the
other day. I know what I'm doing with my Adsense dollars!
I'm not necessarily drawing better or worse than usual lately. I'm drawing like me. It took me forever, but
I'm finally doing the right thing and accepting my style and abilities for what they are, not what I "want
them to be or fantasize about them being." My style is what it is. People are aware of my style by now.
It's not a secret anymore. I'm not the greatest artist in the world, but I'm not anywhere near the bottom of

P a g e | 622
the totem pole either. It would be a deceitful joke to say or claim otherwise. Still, 180 pages in less than
3 months? That's actually really good for a work rate. I'm proud of my work ethic. It's one of the most
powerful weapons I possess in my arsenal.
You can never really call yourself a Master of Narrative and Storytelling until you actually finish
conceiving, and executing the manifestation of your own Literary Narrative. Be it a traditional novel, an
Epic Narrative of some sort, or an Illustrated Novel. You're not a Master Storyteller until you Finish
Something. You're not a Master until the work and project is Complete. If you're as driven as I am, that
final page and finished manuscript Will give you Closure, and Lots of it. My first completed animation
spec script already has.
Now that I made it into Animation Magazine, got closer than ever to getting my own deal, struck up a
friendship with its editor, and won SLG and Oni over with my comics, and have my own YouTube
channel, but CAN go back to WCN and Lulu, do I even WANT TO go crawling back to WCN and Lulu?
All I know is, while they did enhance my status, it was kind of a miserable experience working with Lulu
and WCN. Lulu not so much, but Definitely WCN. Almost as bad as my experience writing for
AnimeTV. AnimeTV wasn't all bad. But it kind of fell apart as the series progressed through its current
run. I do kind of miss when they actually had a budget to work with though. I actually felt sort of
important with that kind of writing gig. But frankly I've never felt as much pressure and stress from any
of my gigs to the degree that I did with that show. It was a real show, no doubt about that, and the first
and maybe last show I've ever worked on, but Jesus that was a lot of pressure. Many eyes were upon me
in 2010.
Finally, Andrew and Facebook get put in their place. By me of course.

Wednesday, November 5th, 2012,

Looking back at my comics page collection I've illustrated, entirely by myself, in chronological order,
from Zounds! to Parallax and End Times, I realized I've improved a whole shitload in the last 16 years of
my life. My Zounds pages aren't anywhere near as good as my End Times pages, and yet no one criticizes
or scrutinizes those. It's a status thing. People only like to criticize it because it IS my best work at the
moment. But in truth, I'm improving a whole shitload. My Blade of the Immortal dojinshi is some of the
best stuff I've ever done so far. That and some of my Akira dojinshi. My most detailed sequential art I've
done recently, is the most dense and detailed art I've ever done. There's too much white in my childhood
comics, but I was a kid after all.
Number of regular sketchbook pages: 180
Number of comic book pages: 180
In the last few years and particularly in 2012, I've done 360 pages of various kinds of art, with half of it
(50%) being comics and the other half (50%) being sketchbooks. Half of my page rate is comic book
layouts.

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I've finished enough pages for a graphic novel if I'm at 180 pages of output right now. This is my first
graphic novel trade paperback I'm going to self-publish in a week or two.
The jig is up, Failbook. You may as well change your name to "Hackbook", "Spybook", "Failbook", or
just "PenisBook". And make it quick! FailBook is dead to me. Glad I tracked that sucker to its source. I'm
not so blind I can't identify the source of bullshit online (i.e. Failbook's wall of shame). They're almost as
unprofessional as MySpace. ALMOST.
Seriously, I don't know WHY I was ever on Cartoon Network, Williams Street, Toonami, and Adult
Swim's side so much. They hardly ever did shit for me. Seriously, fuck em. I'm a cartoonist. What the
fuck do I need a TV for?
Friday, December 7th, 2012,
For the first time ever, I've completed a finished Graphic Novel. I'm one of the youngest people to ever
finish a graphic novel....

They only get better from here. Now I actually can die happy, as I've been waiting for this "first" step to
be completed for at least 15 to 20 years. I'm getting a huge sense of closure with this one. Unfortunately, I
do feel like I kind of unintentionally show my age and inexperience in the art department.

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The sooner I can admit and acknowledge the truth, which is that I'll never work in television animation,
the sooner I'll be able to focus on my real job: Comic Book Author.
It was sometime between 2009 and 2012 that I started making more new enemies than new friends.
I'm building a series of comic book pages, which will add up to building a series of trade paperbacks. In
the next some odd years I plan on building a graphic novel series. They may end up having an actual
story and they may not. But they'll all have panels. I want to see how many panel layout pages I can
create.
I could very well make anywhere between $120 to $480 this by the middle of next year, in royalties
alone.
If I count social security, at the most I could earn $3,240 by the end of 2013....
Less than 3% of the American population makes money online. Technically, I'm a member of that 3%.
I've earned a total of more than $50 online. Small sum of money, but it's money I might not have
otherwise.
My method for generating online profits on a daily basis, almost every day of my life, is a secret. How I
make my money and put myself in the top 3% is yet another one of my top secrets.
How to Draw a Graphic Novel Comic Book Trade
(What I Did)
1.
2.
3.
4.
5.
6.
7.
8.
9.

Keep a Journal
Keep a Sketchbook
Develop Your Concept in Notebooks and in Your Head
DRAW DRAW DRAW. Draw anything and everything under the sun until it becomes a daily
habit
Learn how to construct a 3+ panel page layout, of comics and sequential art, story or none
Generate Comics Pages As Often As Possible Until You Decide on a Stopping Point.
Scan the pages, all 150 of them
Publish you completed masterwork of Graphic Literature.
Start All Over Again...On Second Book. Vol. II, continue learning how to tell a story with
comics.

Comic Book Epitaph: It's not the most rewarding task, the shortest
assignment, least stressful, popularity making, or highest paying job.
But once you finish those 150 pages, you'll instantly feel the
burdensome weight floating up and away and lifting off your shoulders.
That guilty feeling known as "Letting your genius go to waste" will
evaporate, and the heavens will have nothing to depress you with. You
can rest on your laurels, a pillow given to you by your muse with the
words "I did my best" printed on it.

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Now that I've finished my OWN book, I've learned a few things about
how one goes about approaching the process of creating and making, or
drawing and writing a graphic novel or comic book trade.
All those books and tutorials. Helpful as certain parts of them are,
not everything in them is automatically going to help you complete
your work and finish the job and obligation you need to fulfill as a
comics artist. Finishing a book gives you a hell of a lot more
credibility and credence to speak on the subject than someone who
never has finished anything. And last but certainly not least,
sometimes Action is the greatest Glory and Teacher there is. Sometimes
you'll only learn what graphic novel creation, construction, building,
writing, drawing, coloring, pencilling, inking, and lettering methods
works for you if you simply stop taking all those notes, or writing
your thoughts down so much nonstop, and just doing the work. The
weight completion of a whole book will give you will outshine any
negative emotions you might get overwhelmed with early on or halfway
through the comic book trade authoring process.

Sunday, December 9th, 2012

Build It First, Build It Fastest, Build It Efficiently, & Build It Bigger or Biggest.
I say that about Comic Books, Novels, Graphic Novels, Media Companies, Artwork, Literature, TV
Shows, Movies, Businesses, and Internet Websites.
Scorpio: Pablo Picasso, Ted Turner, Bill Gates, Carl Sagan, Chris Prynoski, Tezuka, Musashi Kishimoto
Sagittarius: Jhonen Vasquez, Walt Disney, Stephen Spielberg, JC Penney
Aries: Katsuhiro Otomo, Larry Page

Scorpio Power:
I channel my Scorpio Power into literary insights, Action Comics,
Science-Fantasy, Archetypal Mythology, Big Business Profits, Tech and
Media Engineering Invention / Innovation, and Architectural Design
My alien and otherworldly Fantasy Vision is part of my powers and
abilities of Manifestation as a 22 Master Builder and INTP.

P a g e | 626
I own comics. I never thought I'd see this day, but comics are actually becoming easy for me. I actually
feel like I'm starting to Master Comics. Achieving Mastery and Virtuosity in the field. I want to be the
Beethoven and Les Claypool of comics. Just to have that long-winded virtuoso rhythm. It's hard to
believe I'm already past my 150th page and have published an entire book of comics. It seems like only
weeks ago that I was struggling with completing even 1 page! Let alone 150! Some of those pages are
pretty amazing too. By my own personal standard, they are rather good. I honestly don't know how I got
here. How I got to this level. And how I got to this many pages and page layouts. I guess I was working
hard as a comics artist after all. At least I'm anything but a "lazy" or "uninspired" artist. But because I'm
notoriously hard to get along with socially or publicly in the comics publishing community of publishers
and artists, and because of how much I've been branded as the kind of artist who "doesn't play well with
others and only wants to get down to business", I've found I've had to resort to publishing my own work,
primarily without the aid of an objective audience, an editor, or almost any kind of general supervision.
Even in an "unconventional field" like comics and animation, or manga and anime, my methods, lifestyle,
and techniques are considered "too out there to be accepted or popular". I still try though. Comics and
Animation are and were always my original Fate and Destiny after all, even if and when others didn't feel
that same way for the most part. My Job is My Destiny. And that's Comics.
Todd McFarlane is such a sage. He's one of the only American comics artists in existence to ever take a
lot of influence from the attention-to-detail aspect of anime and manga and was ever able to surpass it. He
acknowledge the influence anime and manga had on him, but actually had the courage and audacity to
realize he could surpass all of his influences, but that actually DID surpass the Japanese MAsters: The
Hiroaki Samuras and Katsuhiro Otomos of this world. Todd McFarlane is one of the top 10 Greatest
Comic Book Artists in the World that isn't Japanese, this side of Moebius and Joe Mad. Maybe I should
read more superhero books. People like Jim Lee and Alex Ross draw superheroes with the dynamicy
McFarlane draws them with. They're at a similar level.
I'm also one of the most well known writer-artist auteurs in the history of the medium. I'm one of the first
people to achieve a level of quality for both literature and art at such a staggering level. I often don't mix
the two, unless we're talking about comics and animation, in which case I find a happy mid-point.
I'm feeling a strong urge to return to writing philosophically and poetically again. Something I haven't
done in a long time. Time to come out of philosopher and poetic writer-narrator retirement I guess. I
haven't wanted to write a poem, a novel, or a philosophy essay this badly since 2001, when teachers at my
high school reacted to my writing favorably and kept requesting more writing from me. Almost every day
that went on for, for at least 2 to 3 years.
Monday, December 10th, 2012,
My royalty net worth increases little by little, every 10 to 15 hours or less. I literally do earn money in my
sleep. That is how royalties work. It's where I make money every ten hours of every day, even in my
sleep, when I'm resting and not even working. I call it "sleep money". Money you make in your sleep.
Royalty money is sleep money.
Most of my ventures (the successful and winning ones) aren't centered around small business, or showbiz.
Most of my inventions, business ideas, patents, and business plans revolve around big business and
manufacturing that affects everybody in some way. I'm good with science and engineering. When I play, I

P a g e | 627
play to win. When I play, I play for keeps. I play by the rules of a titan of industry, not a small town small
fry.

What we see in the people we admire when we're shaping our own lives is the things we truly
want to see in ourselves in the future.
Tuesday, December 11th, 2012,
Revenues just spiked. That makes me so happy!! Oh my God! So happy!!! And my favorite
holiday, Christmas is coming soon. Should I even TRY to stay focused?
But money. It's good and all. But now that I'm starting to make more money than before, or usual
for that matter (which would be no money previously), I'm starting to go the other way. I'm
starting to feel anxiety about possessing "too much money". Making "too much" money can be
something I worry about too, as I've just realized. I'm always paranoid about large and small
sums of money. There is no figure that's "just right. Money can be considered both too much and
too little, depending on the circumstance.
Thursday, December 13th, 2012,
There were some major formatting issues I ran into with End Times, initially. It jumped around a
lot format wise, and I was never completely sure which medium or genre I wanted to work in. It
kept shifting. It shifted from a book, to a comic book, to a manga, to an anime, to a coproduction, to an Animated Action Series, to a novel. It got a bit self-contradictory and
confusing.
Then, just this afternoon, I realized, why conform to just one genre or medium, when I can
invent my OWN GENRE and MEDIUM?! Why NOT make it an illustrated experimental novel?
So I did. Some pages will have sequential art or comics, some pages will have color and/or black
and white illustrations, some pages will have written literary fiction prose. In one sense, this
decision is influenced by the work of Henry Darger.
Essentially, my graphic, illustrated, experimental novel is going to have page layouts just like all
the notes I have lying around my house. It works. That is my natural style. The only difference is
that the writing and art in the final draft will be cleaned up and polished to shine. Some of it will
probably be digitally painted, and painted with acrylics, when I'm not using pen and ink.

Friday, December 14th, 2012,

Comics just ain't comics without skyscrapers, cities, and organic architecture. That's why I'm
always studying Akira and the Ghost in the Shell franchise, for reference. I don't need to make
everything up. It's important to look at something when you draw. Always be adding onto and
touching up old drawings, and always have some art object to trace in your mind. Never only use

P a g e | 628

a blank page. Always use other art as reference. Never just try to pull something out of the void
in and of itself. You'll fail unless you do have and use a page-sized ruler and comic book art (i.e.
alternative/French comics, photos, and manga) to look at.
Even if I have to resort to importing images through Manga Studio Pro software and start off
making panel compositions out of different sketchbook pages that are both vertical and
horizontal, from now on I'm going to work as hard as I can to intensify my panel compositions.
I'm going to make almost every panel more dense and crowded with as much architecture and
density as possible.
Saturday, December 15th, 2012,
Just because Mom assures me "everything is okay", that doesn't ease my suspicions of Florida,
the United States, society, spies, or the media and their "eavesdropping tendencies". I KNOW
something's up. Mom has no clue about the affairs of the world and how fucked up and sneaky
society is. Mom can put up as much of a fight to "relax me" as she and Dad want, but I ain't
buying what the U.S. and Florida is selling. I've seen enough. I know better than to trust those
around me. I know all about Big Brother. "Big Brother is Watching You" - George Orwell.
We're living in an Orwellian Society. There's like a million photos and videos of me out in public
in some archive somewhere. Big Brother is Watching.
So I've heard some girls online have crushes on me. But I can never tell which ones it is that are
attracted to me. Wish I did know. A little flirting never hurt anyone.
Sunday, December 16th, 2012,
The Legends List...
Steven Spielberg, Stephen King, Trent Reznor and Nine Inch Nails, Thom Yorke, Kevin Smith, Quentin
Tarantino, Jhonen Vasquez, Jim Mahfood, Bruce Timm, Todd McFarlane, Les Claypool, They Might Be
Giants

The List of Legends. The Only 12 Writers of Pop Culture I ever truly cared about. They were
THE only names I'd say 50 times a day aloud, and that I actually cared about in my nihilistic and
rebellious adolescence. I was obsessed with those names growing up. They were my role models.
I wanted to be and write just like them. The same way some kids on the internet nowadays seem
to want to be and write just like me. To me, growing up as a youth, they were the most
entertaining, beautiful, deepest voices I had ever heard in my then-brief life. They left quite the
impression on me.
It's not that I don't like the work of other pop culture writers anymore. It's that I've been reciting
the same 15 to 20 famous names or so for the last 20 years, ad nauseam. It wasn't until just
recently when I realized I'm just as good, if not beyond almost every single one of those guys, at
least in terms of writing. Yeah, they're good, but so am I, and I don't see me getting any fanmail

P a g e | 629

like they did. And I never will get fan letters like they do. My name isn't famous in the same way
their names are famous. I'm not heavily liked the way they are. I don't have the luxury of being
well liked by the public or fans. To most people, I'm nothing. Not talented, not intelligent, not
attractive. Nothing. Yes, I seem to have the innovation midas touch, but that's not necessarily
going to earn me any money, especially when I don't finish jack shit besides random books and
graphic novels that are hastily assembled. They're filler. Epic filler. My filler is epic.
Speaking of dumping on other people, I can kick most writer-artists' asses.
I'm the greatest writer-author-artist in the history of the world. No one can simultaneously write
and draw as well as I can. Not the best artist or best writer in the world. In terms of using both
the left and right brains and drawing and writing and shifting back and forth between both
mediums simultaneously, I'm the best, and one of the first, writer-artists in the world. Most
creators who write and draw aren't able to do both with equal dexterity, but if they can, they're
not half as hypergraphic and hyper-literate and hyper-technical at it as I am. I can only think of a
few people who even come close to touching me in the "Simultaneous writer-artist" category: All
the people who had a strong influence on me: Dave Sim, Jeff Smith, Osamu Tezuka, Jhonen
Vasquez, Katsuhiro Otomo. There's also Henry Darger in terms of who I get compared to by
journalists. But he's not an influence. Far from it. He was weird. He never succeeded while he
was still alive either. I've done more words than both Dave Sim and Tezuka. Is this arrogance?
Even if it is, it's not narcissistic or vain arrogance. It's stating the facts. I have no peers. At all
really. I'm just better. I've done screenwriting, cartooning, sketchbooks, acrylics, charcoal, short
fiction, poetry, essays, journals, sharpie markers, graphite pencil, and pen and ink.
The psychological condition (and profession) is a term I like to just now refer to as something I
refer to as "graphic-literacy". As much as I love Otomo and Sim's work and respect them both
equally as literary Gods, and am surpassed by their narrative skills on many levels, one area I've
surpassed them is in word density. While Akira is long and 2,000 pages (roughly), each of the 6
trade paperbacks of Akira don't have a whole lot of words on each page, unless one is to count
the outline at the beginning of each book, but I don't even know if he wrote that himself in reality
or had an editorial assistant at Dark Horse fill in the English back story section. As for Sim? Sim
did Cerebus of course, but even Cerebus with it's 6,000 pages of sequential art uses dialogue
sparingly at time, shortening it's literary density. It's word length is nowhere near Asimov,
Tolstoy, and Dostoevsky density virtuoso level (a book book level of density) which is what I
believe I've gotten very close to. And none of those authors painted anything or filled a
sketchbook. They were more pure, unadulterated authors and writers, unlike myself. being fluent
in graphic-literacy takes sacrifice as both a writer and artist....as often times you don't feel
competent at either, yet oftentimes, you do. But it can be a stressful balancing act to stay active
on both sides, in both fields. Seeing as both fields have qualitative standards and muses to
appease.

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Monday, December 17th, 2012,

2 of the more attractive, mature adult female friends I've made in recent years, on my own time
are Nicole Cook (who I still observe through her online profiles), and Danielle, or
"Stonergoth187" of Adult Swim's forums.

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Chapter 12

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Monday, December 17th, 2012,

So far I've created 20 different inventions on paper. I've thought of 20 separate digital devices
and theories to support and build them.
Some are Software. Some are Hardware. Some are Websites. All are potential game changers.
With Adsense, the websites could earn a lot of money. Some of my inventions will cost money
to use. Some will not cost the consumer anything. Others will be a combination of proprietary
market software and shareware.
With a computer and a TV, I hand-assembled one of the world's first homemade, DIY Home
Theatre PCs (HTPCs).
There IS NO consciousness in the afterlife. After a human being dies, their brains stops
functioning, and as a result so does their consciousness. You return to the place you arrived from
when you were brought into this world as a newborn: Unconsciousness and True Nonexistence.
Non-consciousness. The soul, if it exists, might move on, but no living person has ever known to
where exactly.
It would be very good and cool to die a virgin. Some people fear such an outcome in their lives.
Why is that scary to some people? Most sex is impure. If you never have sex while alive, you are
more pure than most. And I'm not talking about "till marriage" either. Marriage is just as much of
a waste of time in my eyes as sex is. It's the art of foolishness. I wouldn't sully my hands with
that caliber of impurity. I don't touch anyone but myself, and I like it that way. I'm the only one
who can touch me. It's always been that way, and will always stay that way.
I will live in a big house, in a rich part of town, by myself, an isolated reclusive, with maybe one
aid or assistant. That I trust the way I trust my friend Chris. Family life isn't exactly something
that runs in my blood. Solitude is.
So what exactly IS the TV saying about one of the world's most prolific authors and auteurs (aka
yours truly)?
Been writing books for a long time now. At least since way before [adult swim] or YouTube ever
existed.
When you don't watch TV and use computers as much as other kids, you produce literary works
of the length I produce them at.
Tuesday, December 18th, 2012,
Currently Listening To - "The Greatest Man Who Ever Lived", Weezer.

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Two areas I excel as: Screenwriter, Novelist. I have a way with words. Way beyond anything I
do with comics in my personal books. Which is not to say that I'm getting better with being a
Cartoonist, too, because I am. I've recently gotten a LOT better.
Top Career Skill Levels (Based on Amount of Progress and Ability Levels):
1. Tech Inventor
2. TV Animation Screenwriter
3. Science-Fantasy Novelist
4. Architectural Production Designer
5. Manga-Ka Action Cartoonist
6. Acrylics Painter and Fine Artist
Wednesday, December 19, 2012,
I liked Scooby-Doo BETTER when it was derided by the public for the turd it truly is.
Thursday, December 20th, 2012,
Technically, I was an unplanned birth, in 1983. It's why I'm adopted to begin with. That's just
how I roll. Why else would I be pro-life. I'm still a democrat though. You don't have to believe
EVERY democrat ethical standpoint just to qualify as a democrat. What morons believe that
kind of garbage: Anti-bipartisanship. I HATE anti-bipartisanship. I believe two sides CAN work
together. They have to if they want to survive and not live in a world of nonstop war and
conflict.
Finally, I'm ripping DVDs again. By the dozen at least. Ripping is fun and pleasurable. Ripping
and streaming is more fun than television, like 90% of the time. Great way to kill time. I like my
PSP Crisis Core, too, but what's better than stream files I invent myself!? Copyright doesn't mean
shit to me. I poop on copyright notices. Man! Fuck copyright! If I listened to that crock of shit
thrown together by evil, corporate, self-absorbed, and greedy fat cats, I'd still be broke. Follow
the rules and you'll be broke forever. Be daring, be bold. Break copyright rules. Copyright is
poopee. And it smells like poopee. Copyright, in the age of YouTube and Netflix, contradicts
freedom of speech and freedom of expression online. Lawrence Lessig is the only lawyer that
makes sense in that regard. Copyright ISN'T "Right"
I'm going to become a dramatic cartoonist LONG before I'd ever have the opportunity to become
a dramatic TV Animation Exec.

How do you write real serious animation drama?

How do you draw real serious animation drama?
Abolish all smiles and comedic gimmicks.
No Tongue in Cheek Seriousness to mock real drama
Danger, danger, and more danger. Strangers, Strangers, and more Strangers. High Risk.

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Influences on my drama? The X-Files, The Sopranos, Grand Theft Auto Franchise,
AKIRA, Ghost in the Shell, Valve and Half-Life, Johnny The Homicidal Maniac,
Cerebus, Blade of the Immortal
Style: Black and Red. Guns and Weapons and Fighting. Dark Shadows. Serious, Angry,
and Sad Expressions
Every comedic producer wants to turn my personality into this "comedic" thing. Makes
me sick. I don't feel comedic. And I have no desire to convey comedy. Black Comedy
maybe, but even not so much that kind either.

Friday, December 21st, 2012,

I'm going another day without eating any real food, and I couldn't feel better.
What I have, other than hypergraphia and hyper-literacy, is a genuine passion and pleasure with
words, writing, and reading. Whether it's a book or a comic book, a script, a journal, or a graphic
novel. I just like escaping into a forest of words and letters. I like embracing words, letters, and
writing all day long. Almost as fun as the auteur cinema. I'm a genuine voracious reader.
I find God in many things that exist on this earth. But I find The Most God in beautiful and
enormous organic, Classic European and Contemporary Asian Architecture. That, technology,
and the Martial Arts. I find the most God in grand, awe-inspiring architecture aesthetics, the
ubiquity of technology, Friendship or Loyalty, and the choreography of the motions of martial
arts and wuxia, or the warrior arts.
Saturday, December 22nd, 2012,
The Japanese would never want to collaborate on an anime with someone like me. Whatever
requirements one needs to meet, I haven't met any of them, I'd wager. I'm not interested in
working with the Japanese on an anime co-production. It seems highly unlikely. Even more
unlikely than it already did. It really is too bad. I do love Japan. But they're so passiveaggressive, so love-hate. I don't get along with people like that in my own country. I don't know
how I'd ever manage it internationally. Anipipo's different. That's one opportunity that actually
looks like it holds some promise. In the past I was so drawn to Katsuhiro Otomo's power and
support of my work it almost blinded me to everything else at the time, even at the expense of
my relationship with Cartoon Network. I feel like it seems like it sort of alienated them from
continuing to like me a bit.
Sunday, December 23rd, 2012,
You know, many anime insiders do consider me to be the Eiichiro Oda of American OEL
manga. And you know what? I'm okay with that. I don't mind a comparison like that. Jhonen got
compared to Tim Burton a lot in the beginning, but eventually it quieted down.

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Current Websites At My Disposal:

http://www.webcomicsnation.com
http://www.youtube.com
http://www.twitter.com
http://www.lulu.com
http://www.skillshare.com
http://www.adsense.com
http://boards.adultswim.com

Monday, December 24th, 2012,

Things coming in 2013:

Anipipo
SkillShare.com
On Call Programmers
YouTube/Adsense.com
Lulu.com
Webcomics Nation

Plans for 2013:

If Anipipo works out in 2013, I'll develop a Japanese anime production plan...
If SkillShare works out in 2013, I'll develop an academic plan...
Either way, 2013 could be a crucial year for me...
TV and forums don't help much with pressure. If anything, they put too much pressure on me to
live up to my famous and iconic reputation. All those pyramid schemes trying to mimic my style.
I find my favorite comics and art books to be a nice escape from the pressure. Looking at good
art while you draw is a great way to make drawing less intimidating. Copying from others' work
is fun, and helps me forget about the pressure. To overcome the pressures of work, I need to
forget about it with something that inspires and motivates me to keep going. That's my favorite
printed artwork from my favorite creators.
Writing story outlines is incredibly easy for me. Way easier than script or novel description and
plot. But honestly, writing outlines is just throwing a bunch of verbs and nouns together. You
know, just write "The man ran up to the rocky cliff, jumped off the ledge, and flew away in mid

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fall until he exploded in midair." That kind of thing tends to be a lot easier than writing
descriptively and with narrative structure.
It's Christmas Eve. Been reading the Bible. Well, a contemporary version of it anyway. There's a
revolution. Christianity. Had a lot of trouble not being popular in Western society, even after
over 2,000 years, or Two Millennia. Christmas is the celebration of the Birth of Our Lord Jesus
Christ. As long as some old person isn't muttering that to me in a supermarket or library or
something, I don't find it offensive. At all really. I don't proclaim myself to be a Christian. But
like the Buddha, Jesus H. Christ was a manifestation of a Holy Light in History. A strong
defiance of Roman Power, the highest power of that day. I'm sure some of my lower thinking
opponents and rivals would predict I'd use a moment like this to "promote myself", but I have no
such ego. Egolessness is what Jesus taught his disciples. Sacrifice and Humility. Those lessons
have taught us how to achieve a higher transcendence, even after Two Millenniums. Sometimes I
wish I still could go to Church. I was baptized when young, and I attended church when young. I
always found the local Church to be a warm and quiet place. I found great peace there. Like none
I've ever found in adulthood.
And when I stop and reflect, I see what's really going on. TV, the news, Florida. I see great evil
and corruption in these things. Great abuse and evil going on, betrayal of strength, power, and
trust. I look at TV, and I realize my mistake has been to listen to TV. It's the Devil. I've been
dancing WITH the devil. They are not of Holy lineage as Christ was. I see this now. TV shows
us Visions of the Devil most of the time. It is a corrupted vision. Far from the value of the Bible.
Or Jesus. Or God. Or Salvation. Or Transcendence and Humility. And especially Egolessness. I
can't solve all these problems. I can merely keep on my quest for Glory in the Land of the
Unholy.
Tuesday, December 25th, 2012,
Woo-Hoo! It's Christmas Morning! Can't wait until the family wakes up!
I seem to be developing a working relationship with Tokyo and Silicon Valley denizen Hiroaki
Taira of Anipipo fame. I love reading his tweets. I hope to work with him on an Anipipo project,
once the site is fully functional. I'm a fan.
On a non-Christmas note, Myth and Mythology building is one of my favorite kinds of story
system structure. Structurally speaking, in terms of story and narrative aesthetics, Mythopoeia
just hits all the right notes. Nothing pleases the senses of a story audience quite like archetypes
that tap into the collective unconscious. Lore, and action, and adventure, and conflict, and
heroes. Stories like Lord of the Rings just hit all the right notes.

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New(er) story ideas:

Intergalactic Transdimensional Outer Space Olympics

Mailman Travels
G.I. Jim

I got a new horoscope today. Christmas.

It says I work hard, am unrelenting or unwavering, and I'm very giving and give a lot of myself
for the sake of other people.
I know a lot of people read everything I write on a computer and have a fairly large international
audience in real time. And even though my "word processor audience" isn't as big as my internet
audience, it's obvious a lot of people are paying attention to this particular PC. So I'm keeping
ranting to a minimum, in hopes of encouraging the spirit of Christmas in a general sense. At the
least, I don't bother to write it to begin with. At the most, I write it and delete it pretty swiftly. I
don't believe in encouraging anger during the holidays.
End Times, like I've said numerous times before, pure mythology. It's an Epic Saga and Quest
Story about a Gallant yet Gritty and Barbaric Hero, Mono Jubei, who embarks on a quest to kill
New-Earth's Greatest Threat to Survival, The Terrorist Antichrist who is secretly and
mysteriously tied to Mono Jubei somehow. It's a very Vader-Skywalker-esque story element.
Defeating a member of your own family.
Just as Luke Skywalker goes on an Epic Quest Across Galaxies to Defeat Darth Vader, and just
as Samurai Jack Travels Through the Future to Return to the Past Where he can Slay Aku, his
one true foe, Mono is on a single minded quest to Kill The Antichrist Demon Mastermind of
New-Earth, Nosferatu.
From now on, I'm reducing my journal page count from 600-700 pages per book to 200 pages
per book. To save costs and money, and to lower my publishing budget. That's 10 Journal files
for each book.
Thursday, November 27th, 2012,
This month is the first month of the rest of my life. Whatever level I'm at now is only the
beginning of my career. I'm nowhere near my peak. Considering how much more work I've got
left in me, I'd say I've got (at the very, very least) a few decades left until I reach my creative
peak. The last 20 years has been me establishing a brand and presence. The next 20, between the
ages of 30 and 50 will be me actually working.

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Friday, November 28th, 2012,

I like being a CEO. The first executive magazine I got a free subscription to was a subscription I
got for free to the magazine CEPro. I filled out a handful of forms on a LinkedIn Affiliate site,
and low and behold, I now get trade magazines in the mail for free. For being a boss of my own
company online. Being a CEO Executive is great!
I'm going to put my Skillshare resume on hold, in favor of Social Blade, and Anipipo's projects.
SkillShare.com will be a last resort.
The only 1 element of the three pillars of professionalism (Screenwriting, Novels, Comics) is my
comics. But I've got time to perfect it. I need to make a list of all the things wrong with my
comics pages.
I'm turning 30 next year, in November 17th of 2013. I've got to clean my room up...I guess. That
and lose some weight with some running shoes.
--Saturday, December 29th, 2012,
I've got a bad, bad, awful, really horrible case of writers block. Not diarists, or autobiographer's
block.

Blocks I do have: Fiction Writer's Block. That and Sequential Artist's Block, or
Cartoonist's Block.
Blocks I don't have: Sketchbook Artist's Block, Screenwriter's Block.

The market doesn't move until I Myself do. The market doesn't revolutionize, innovate, speed up,
build things bigger, until I do it on a grassroots, DIY, and individual level. The market is waiting
for me to produce my work and shoot off the signal flare that says it's okay to charge ahead into
the murky battleground that is the TV, broadcasting, and publishing landscape.
At 17, I thought I had it all figured out. The entire premise of my book, or Journal series, was me
hypothesizing about my "future career outcome". But looking back, it's obvious I didn't have a
clue. I thought I'd be a famous Comic Book Artist Turned TV Creator-Exec by the age of 28.
Obviously, I took a much different path. We're mostly not able to predict the direction and
destination in life as though it were a linear path. Life is like the mind. Nonlinear and
Directionless. I had Self-Confidence and Energy at the time because I thought I knew exactly
which pathway I was traveling on, and I thought I knew exactly where my life was headed. I saw
nothing but success in my future. I didn't exactly fail, but I didn't exactly mold my future either. I
wasted most of my time letting my mind wander around on the page with a word process, as
opposed to actually writing scripts or drawing comic book pages, but instead writing about how
much I wanted to do that very thing (and therefore being blocked and procrastinating at it

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without realizing it). My intentions were good, but my execution was sloppy, and terrible. I
wrote a lot of writing, but very little commercial writing. Turns out the world DIDN'T want to
listen to what I had to say to it in reality. If there's one thing my life path hasn't been, it would be
"predictable" and "foreseeable". My ingenious and analytical mind tried desperately (with
MUCH fretting) to try to put the puzzle together and try to lay out a linear path for me to ensure
my survival. But ultimately my subconscious mind's survival instincts and pre-cognition fell
short of helping me reach my true ideals. In some ways I can see the future in terms of trends,
but not in terms of human activity. Human activity has an unpredictable, self-destructive, antisocial, sociopathic, self-annihilating aspect to it. And half the time that's the shit you don't see. If
we knew what some crazy guy or society was going to do, trying to seek power through violence
or whatever, we'd prevent it well ahead of schedule. Plus, people would attempt to manipulate
the market, society, and culture to their business and financial advantage and try to scam
everyone else and rip everyone else off, Even more than they already DO try to! If you could
predict events, you could make good guys look like bad guys on TV. And you could make bad
guys look like good guys (on TV). This is something society ALREADY tries to do, even
without any real psychic ability, but instead by abusing intuitive instincts in society, by using
things like subliminal messages, and racist and xenophobic stereotypes, and reverse psychology,
and mind games, and propaganda, and brainwashing, and branding, and marketing. These (and
others) are many of the mental techniques con-men and con-women attempt to abuse control and
manipulate the collective unconscious.
There are quite a few pros and cons to free-form writing. One is, you can say whatever you want.
One con is, you make a lot of spelling and grammatical errors, because you're so obsessed with
getting the words out. Honestly, the writing process is something I've actually mastered for a
change. I never mastered art like I've mastered free-form writing and screenwriting. I don't like
to admit I've mastered something, as that tends to make me rest on my laurels and give up.
Those were the days...
My Journal Book Series is 200 Chapters long, if I count the Hypergraphia Chronicles and
Manifesto 2.0. Manifesto 2.0 is my next book series.

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Sunday, December 30th, 2012,

Political Views:

Political Affiliation: Liberal, Democrat, Bipartisan

Gun Rights: Against
Abortion: Pro-Life
Taxation for the Wealthy: For
Minority Rights: For
Women's Right: For
Gay Marriage: Against
Gays and Women in Military: For
Gay Rights: For
Death Penalty: Against
Romney/Palin vs. Obama: Obama
Globalism: For
Immigration Rights: For
Outsourcing of Jobs: Only in the Entertainment Animation Sector, not Manufacturing
Religious Affiliation: Zen Buddhist / Taoist / Pantheist / Mystical / Christian
Legalization of Drugs For Medical/Recreational Purposes: Against
-----

I'm done trying to show off my power to people I don't know who don't even like me or approve
of what I do. Why the fuck did I ever waste time even bothering to show my power levels off.
Showing off my power publicly is a waste of time. Time that could otherwise be used to Master
and Fine Tune my abilities. No more showing off my raw power online. From this moment on,
I'm focusing on fine tuning my abilities. I need no acknowledgement. My power is very real.
There is no reason to attempt to prove or verify that fact to myself or competitors anymore. Get
real, Jay.
It all boils down to self-confidence. Self-confidence means you don't need to show off to the
public just to not feel insecure about yourself. Self-confidence to me means I truly do believe in
myself, and the security and energy of my power.
You can have all the power in the world (as I do), and you can show it off publicly all day long
(as I've been known to do), but you'll still get assaulted by emotional and physical bullies and
thugs on a regular basis. Just because you have power doesn't mean everyone (or anyone, for that
matter) would ever acknowledge your power. No one acknowledges my influence and power. I
never make any power lists. The media and press never pay me any mind. And yet I'm one of the
most powerful people there is, in terms of art, engineering, technology, and literature. I'm a
polymath with a lot of influence and power in numerous fields. Does anybody pay me any

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respect or mind. No. Do they "have to"? Of course not. No. Not at all. Just because you
command power doesn't mean you command everyone's respect. Or often, any respect, for that
matter.
Power does not always command acknowledgement, or even the slightest of respect, depending
on the person. If anyone were a walking testament to this concept, I would be that person. I've
done a lot and control a lot, but I can't just "command other people to do things." If my own
biological family never acknowledged me, which they never did, why in the world would
strangers.
----My drawing abilities have increased tenfold. I've mastered detail in the last 10 or so years. I'm
definitely Corey, Gerhard (Cerebus), Jim Lee, Joe Mad, Moebius, Syd Mead, Otomo, and
McFarlane detail-level worthy.
The only part of me that actually wants to say "I can't draw, I'm an untalented or lazy artist, or
my style is oversimplified and not detailed" is in fact the part of me that has the nerve to forget
what I've already drawn in the recent past. My sketchbook memory is terrible. I'm infamous for
forgetting what many of my best drawings look like, even within not years, but days, of drawing
them. I'm already drawing at the style and detail level I'm happy with. I might not be one of the
world's greatest artists, but I'm good enough to be happy with a lot of my output. I only suck
when I don't try. I fail when I don't try, which is not often.
Not really counting, but last time I counted:

600 pages of art and comics

1 million words

That's actually pretty good. For a long-lost descendant of William The Conqueror one of the first
kings of Great Britain and France. That would be me. My father's name Glendis Ralph Sorrell,
Trappist Monk and Automotive Manufacturer of English and French descent to Ann Arbor,
Michigan, and later, to Casselberry, Florida, where my adoptive family and myself reside, which
I had to go through a court to attain in a death certificate of his, clearly shows this. The first place
I lived on my own, out on my own, was Fort Lauderdale, Miami, Florida, at the Sunrise Hall
Living Quarters, as part of the Media Arts and Animation Program, which I would later drop out
of to pursue a home-based internet career in back at Casselberry Florida, where I retreated to, to
pursue unpaid work in Webcomics and Broadcasting on YouTube from my YouTube channel,
which is worldwide, but that I ran from my computer room and bedroom on 2 computers in
Casselberry in Central Florida, where I contributed to YouTube's acquisition by media giant
Google, which was purchased for a tidy sum of $1.65 billion. None of which I received any for
my contribution of making it possible to watch corporate and copyrighted animation and film

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and video content online through YouTube from the year 2005 onward, but was a technique that
was adapted widely and is use ubiquitously online in streaming video today.
But that's just my life. How have you been anyway?
Tuesday, January 1st, 2013,
Nice way to start off the new year. I'm in my prime. I didn't realize it until just now, but Cary's
very over-assertive and territorial, in his own house. And I'm starting to realize something. Dad,
Cary, the same Cary who raised me, is threatened and intimidated by my success. I don't think he
WANTS me to be more successful than him. He's threatened and intimidated by the fact that I'm
the new man about town.
I'm kind of screwed, no matter what I do:

If things stay the way they are, I'll continue to be miserable, and Cary will continue being
threatened by me and trying to force therapy and medication on me. Calling me
schizophrenic.
If I succeed and become a successful person, EVERY idiot in town will assume if a loser
like me can do it, everyone else is "entitled to do the exact same thing" despite the fact
that most people are lazy, ignorant, uncreative, and untalented. Everyone would treat me
like the bad guy even more than they do now if I was popular and had power.
If I go to the poorhouse, there would be consequences to me having NO power anymore.
I wouldn't be on the internet anymore and would have to shut down my YouTube
Channel, my tweet feed, my email account, and never post on Adult Swim's forum or my
blog ever again. It would be a catastrophic media blackout leaving a black hole in the
media world. The "No Joe Absentee Effect" So my empire would be obliterated, a ghost
town, and/or shut down entirely.

My life sucks and I'm miserable no matter what happens.

---Wednesday, January 2nd, 2013,
I'm bored with Mono. I think I've taken Mono just as far as any one creator can take any one
character. Mono will never receive funding, but people will continue to try to take him from me.
So I'm gonna draw something else. Talk about overkill. Drawing Mono isn't fun anymore. It
overtaxes me, and I hate that.
I want to do tech. I want to be a Tech Titan. I'd rather be a billionaire than a millionaire, be it
through novels, licensing of my patents, or inventions and websites sold to silicon valley. This is
my new(est) passion.

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Mark Zuckerberg, Larry Page, Bill Gates, Steve Jobs, Ted Turner, Michael Dell. These are the
guys who take an aggressive stand toward profits. Lately I get lumped in with this crowd more
than anyone else. The tech industry is where the money is. Tech Empires pay more than any
other empire. You don't see any cartoonists or animators making BILLIONS of dollars, in
royalties. If you want to earn millions of dollars, sell out and go into TV animation like Family
Guy and SpongeBob. Make your puny little $50 million a year or whatever the fuck it is. Make
your little forgettable sitcom. You want real money, go into computer science and Silicon
Valley. Most creative billionaires (JK Rowling, Oprah, Spielberg, Lucas) are on the low end of
the billionaire level revenue scale anyway. The real money is in capitalizing on inventions you
build and tested from scratch, Steve Wozniak style.
Things I'm Stopping (Mostly)

DeviantART
ASMB
Art
TV Animation
Manifesto
Animation Production
Cartooning
TV

What I'm continuing

Novels
Outlines
Scripting
Meditating
Exercising
Computers
Money
Rest and Relaxation
Resting on my Laurels

Friday, January 4th, 2013,

"A Little Local Recognition"
My own power (in the technology field) is starting to influence the economics of my own
hometown, or the local city I grew up in, Seminole County - Casselberry, Orlando, FL. I'm
actually starting to influence the brand and credibility of the local economy and industry.

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Here's the breakdown:

The Houston Chronicle ran an article on America's 9 Most Tech-Friendly Cities: There were the
usual suspects: Silicon Valley - Mountain View (Google), San Francisco, New York City, Austin
(Texas), Boston, Seattle, Los Angeles, and Washington, D.C..... Ann Arbor, Atlanta and
Colorado didn't make the list, but last but not least, my own hometown of Orlando, made the
list. I contributed to that current status among Tech Titans and Giants of Industry. I guess I'm
finally starting to reap what I sew. Orlando's Rise among Tech Industry Titans in some circles
was in fact helped at least partially by my own progress as a tech entrepreneur. I'm finally
turning into the influential Master Builder of Tech I always knew I could be. Thanks in part of
Microsoft's Software and Google's endorsement of me. Well, them, YouTube, and the big
business and media community. It's nice to know I actually have been contributing to the local
scene in some way, on some level. I've faced a lot of attacks and criticism, but so has everyone at
the top. The way people assault me visually and subliminally is no different than how a lot of
influential celebs and execs get treated. I get treated like a billionaire.
Favorite Places? Casselberry, Downtown Orlando, Winter Park, Fort Lauderdale Miami, Los
Angeles, California, Michigan, Ann Arbor, Colorado, Boulder, Illinois, Kankakee, Europe, Asia,
Japan, Tokyo, China, Hong Kong, Britain, Berlin, Canada, Toronto, Ontario, Quebec, Paris,
France. Every one of these places is an industrial and cultural hub in some way, on some level.
About Orlando, my good old home
According to a Wikipedia article:
"Orlando is a major industrial and hi-tech center. The metro area has a $13.4 billion technology
industry employing 53,000 people and is a nationally recognized cluster of innovation in digital
media, agricultural technology, aviation, aerospace, and software design. More than 150
international companies, representing approximately 20 countries, have facilities in Metro
Orlando."
I don't entirely know how I became so powerful in places like Orlando and Silicon Valley, but
now that I am aware on some level of how influential I am, I will never take that power for
granted. That power rests solely with me. It has ever since the DVD and YouTube's
unprecedented success as one of the biggest success stories in the history of the world, and how
I'm so closely linked to that success and influence. With Great Power Comes Great
Responsibility. I have the power to make Orlando an actual decent place to live in the future, if I
stay here. Everyone else has that same power to improve this city in my opinion, but clearly, not
everyone believes in their ability to improve this world, to the degree that I do.
How do I feel right now? Good overall. Kind of overwhelmed with a sense of overwhelming
power. I feel different after reading that article. Before I read the article, I felt aimless, lost,
pointless, bored, frustrated, without a real purpose or direction, just letting the enormous cruise

P a g e | 645

ship I'm either controlling or made possible drifting aimlessly at sea, not knowing what
tomorrow holds, just knowing there's probably more boredom and daily monotony ahead of me.
Then, when I read the list article by The Houston Chronicle of all places, it was like being struck
by lightning. I felt like Benjamin Franklin capturing lightning in a bottle, like a giant anchor had
been suddenly unloaded off of the ship onto the sea bottom of a Florida Harbor, right off the
coast, like suddenly, I'm grounded somewhere and have received a message from the heavens of
what to do with my time, what new goal(s) to set, and like my life had been given a new and
sorely needed purpose. A new angle, a new direction. And that direction is: Inventing and if I'm
lucky, Licensing and big business. I feel grounded, like I now have a real home. Like a million
pounds of pressure and weight had been lifted off of my shoulders. Now I know what I must do.
It's a miracle. My life has purpose now. I have a new goal, and it couldn't be more clear.
Saturday, January 5th, 2012,
Apparently, I live in a cultural hub now. Well, the downtown mainland areas are definitely. And
here I thought Ft. Lauderdale was the only place around here with culture. No, Orlando's got
culture. It's an industry-friendly city. I'm starting to like Florida BETTER THAN California.
L.A. is just a bunch of small fries anyway. Selfish, ruthless, and self-absorbed individuals that
just assume they've got more power than I am and "better than me". Screw that, man! I'm
sticking with Orlando.
As long as I have s.s. payments and Adsense, I probably won't move somewhere else. For a
while there, I entertained the thought of moving, but that was when I didn't realize how valuable
I am to the Central Florida economy. I'm one of the reasons Orlando and Central Florida have
one of the highest valued local tech industries in the world: $13.4 billion. That's higher than
Mark Zuckerberg's net worth.
I know exactly why all the "big shots" take a dump on me daily. It's because I'm bigger than
them now. Not just some of the networks and celebrities, and websites either. All of them. They
view me as the corporate giant, and themselves as the "little guys", despite the fact that they earn
billions while I'm only worth billions but hardly get paid as such. To them, my influence, fame,
and power is a formidable adversary, and a "serious threat". They're threatened by my influence
and success. They KNOW I'm bigger than them. Surface data doesn't reveal this. But market
research and raw information does. They're just waiting for me to screw up and embarrass
myself so they can pounce on me. They WANT me to do something wrong, just so they can
torture me with it and rub it in and with my face. Kind of obvious. They're more visible. NOT
more powerful. I'm the only one with real influence here. You can quote me on that too.
Paraphrase, quote. Same difference.
Striving, working, and persevering to be the most of something beneficial and important, like
influence or whatever, has been a longtime goal of mine. When will I finally accept that you
don't need to be the Most (Whateverist) Man in the World (Prolific, Powerful, Prestigious, or

P a g e | 646

Rich) and just learn to make peace and reconcile with where I am now, not where I am not but
wish to be. It's a natural human motivation for the ingenious and gifted. But that doesn't mean
you don't have to learn to accept your life for what it is. Not just what you wish it to be.
Sunday, January 6th, 2013,
Currently, I'm working on my current two favorite career pastimes: Computers and Streaming
Video Files. Organizing my streaming video files and DVDs is my new most passionate hobby.
Even more so than this journal and art or comics. That's a very intentional shift. Sometimes you
need to switch up your routine.
My Art and Comics Mind is Driven by Ego
My Writing Mind is Driven by Compulsion
My Computer Mind is Driven by Utility
My Previous Purpose in Life was to be a Toon Innovator, and a TV Animation Exec. Whether or
not that's actually possible, it doesn't matter. I'm getting older. And just as life and society, and
culture, and business, and the whole world changes, so do my goals.
My current purpose is to be a Digital Innovator Working on a Low Budget, For little or no
money. But Building New Ways of Doing Things Digitally.
Me Over the Last 12 Years Writing In My Journal:
I gotta practice, Gotta Draw. Wanna be brilliant, Wanna be brilliant, I wanna be brilliant! Typing
away at random things.
* First Self-Published Comic Trade Arrives in the mail *
* Opens Box and thumbs through pages 12 years later *
In disappointed voice: "Oh pooh. I'm not brilliant. I'm the opposite of brilliant!"
---Monday, January 7th, 2013
I must be on a winning streak. I earned $98 in the last half a year or so, through online profits
alone. I'm $2 away from reaching a milestone: The $100 Mark, upon which I get monthly
payments instead of only once ever. And I've almost finished setting up a payment method where
instead of getting a paycheck, the money is wired directly to my bank account and debit card.
Open Your Mouth = Lose.
Keep Your Mouth Shut = Win.

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I'm going to be starting a business eventually. Start My Own Business. Making money like I
have been, paying my taxes, contributing to the economy with a small business LLC and
employees.
Tuesday, January 8th, 2013
I'm in the process of building a new website prototype. I'm integrating certain functions, in an
effort to make the web experience I design easier on the customer. It will probably always be a
privately own company. All the money's in websites, especially my kind. Website building can
certainly pay well.
I have some new tech ideas. A new kind of website, some new kinds of home electronics
hardware, and a new kind of PC.
My career as an entrepreneur and web developer is just starting to heat up. If the whole Adsense
thing ends up paying well, I'll use it to fund my business ventures. Anipipo, Video PC,
StreamWave, StreamFactory. Just everything I'm good at. And I'll continue to rip videos and
store them on my PC. I'll also continue to edit video and author DVDs. I'll be one busy guy.

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Friday, January 11th, 2013,

Whoa.
Dark Horse actually published the majority of their popular manga sales and readership figures.
Not one to brag but I'm doing a hell of a lot better, audience wise, than I thought...

Appleseed: 115,000
Astro Boy: 150,000
Berserk: 500,000
Blade of the Immortal: 450,000
Blood+: 50,000
Gantz: 25,000
Gunsmith Cats: 175,000
Hellsing: 625,000
Lone Wolf & Cub: 1,000,000
Oh My Goddess: 450,000
Trigun: 200,000
Trigun Maximum: 370,000
Gungrave Archives: 5,000
Roman Album: Samurai Champloo: 3,000
Style School: 10,000
Vampire Hunter D Illustrated Novels: 300,000

My Worldwide YouTube Audience:

SplitAtomBoom: 500,000 viewers (by midway through 2013)

I have a larger audience than 90% of the mainstream manga titles published by Dark Horse
Comics. I never would have guessed. That's pretty amazing...
I suppose I should thank YouTube and the Internet. Without them, I'd never be able to compete
with the power players of comics, animation, TV, printed literature, and film.
I predict that within the next decade, there will be no one left to top...but myself.
Some books never make it beyond the 300,000 copies-sold mark if they don't attain that online
support in places like YouTube and the Swim Boards. Most of Dark Horse's top-selling manga
titles with the largest number of copies sold (betwen 370k - 1m) have some form of mainstream
internet support. They have been around for over a decade, or have a tie into an anime TV series
that has a lot of YouTube support from fans. Sales are often linked and tied to internet
popularity.

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An online audience-base of half a million. Is definitely something to brag home about. That's a
very large number of people. That means I'm popular and successful, and even if I'm not, my
worldwide online empire is. It was a hard fought battle getting to where I am today. One of the
things that makes me so powerful is I'm NOT overhyped. The media doesn't actually
acknowledge me or my success. People genuinely discover my style on their own. It's hidden
away in archives. But it's there. Most definitely it's there and it's very real.
Twitter is my marketing platform. So is Adwords, and YouTube. They're all one big commercial
for my brand that people actually don't seem to mind.

Funding: Anipipo, Kickstarter, MangaMagazine.net, Adsense

Financial
Sites:
Adsense,
Adwords,
BankofAmerica.com,
Amazon, eTrade
Publishing: Lulu, CreateSpace, WCN, DeviantART,
Scribd,
Blogger, YouTube
Marketing Sites: Adwords, Twitter, Google, CreateSpace
Distributors: BookTango, Scribd, Amazon, Diamond Comics

Business format: LLC, Privately Owned

a royalty, and so do the other founders.

and

Operated,

get

Saturday, January 12th, 2013,

One thing I never have to worry about is staying relevant. The thing is, I never become
irrelevant. Everything I do is relevant. I've got plenty of relevance, and a timelessness about me.
I never stop being relevant.
One of the things that really relaxes me and calms my nerves is escaping into a literary or
filmmaking saga of mythos and fables. It's the grownup equivalent of a bedtime story. After all,
Tolkien's Lord of the Rings started as a homemade bedtime story for Tolkien's grandkids.
Most pop culture is disposable and forgotten about a few years later...permanently. No one really
remembers or cares about it. Therefore it is not a classic or masterpiece. Classics are timeless and
last for centuries.
YouTube Set me up to win, to succeed and beat competitors.
Parallax set me up to lose, to fail and be disrespected.
After testing out both platforms, I know where my priorities lie.
While I won't make much money being a YouTube customer, I can take a lot of the knowledge
and experience I gained from being a YouTube engineer and pioneer, and apply it to other
ventures and projects, that I can build up over time and beta test from home.

P a g e | 650

New Technique I picked up through practice:

Foreground BG tricks. The BG shouldn't always feel so distant. French Comics and Katsuhiro
Otomo are masters of this technique. Where we see architecture overlap the so-called "front of
the composition" where character(s) is standing, talking, or fighting. I like adding things like
rocks and walls to the very front of the composition to make it more three dimensional. Well, I
do now that I've discovered it. Composition in comics should be thought of in terms of fore,
middle, and back ground. Putting large separated background elements like mountains and
buildings in the foreground enhances the composition. When drawing illustrations and
illustrating and layout out comic book pages, the character does not always need to be the only
thing closes to the camera. Not every character has to be blatantly show connecting his feet to a
ground plain. That's too obvious. If the camera is showing a low angle, looking upward at the
scene, the characters lower body and or feet will always be overlapped by the foreground BG.
Nifty little trick there. I like it. I'm already starting to master it.
Parallax is full of horror and action and vision
Oliver's series, the potential follow up will take a different tone and style. More of a Children's
show, full of madcap comedy and intellectual-slapstick mad scientist-genius related humor. With
adventure and irony. Something a little more lighthearted and off the wall, a nice vacation from
the heaviness of New-Earth.
Monday, January 14th, 2013,
I launched my Kickstarter project today. I guess I'll just have to see how that goes. I'm kind of
testing the waters to see how much actual support my project gets.
Every drawing I do in the future will be better as long as it contains a background, mid-ground,
and foreground in its composition. My drawings never used to have so much midground and
foreground integration. And they certainly didn't have as much foreground in them, if at all. I did
tons of drawings of compositions while using this technique. I'm happy with the results. It has a
very Parisian vibe to it. Parisian comics us a lot of foreground imagery. American comics don't
do that as much. I've read a lot of them, and I don't recall them having such an element.
Canadian Animation, Franime, DC Animated, Bill Plympton, Titmouse (Flash Animation),
Frank Miller. I want to adapt End Times into an animated short film. But due to the nature of its
production values, I'm looking at a challenging goal.
Achievements:

Drew 44 pages of drawings in 2 days.

Developed New Back/Mid/Foreground Composition technique
Launched Kickstarter Project on Imaginomicon II

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Tuesday, January 15th, 2013,

Yes, I think developing various creative ideas and maintaining my various web accounts and
developing different ideas, along with daily writing and drawing practice and activity, can help
me deal with my depression. I think as long as I stay active with my daily routine and work I
won't get too depressed.
Wednesday, January 16th, 2013,
Writers of the current generation:
Stephen King, Tom Clancy, Quentin Tarantino, Kevin Smith, Seth MacFarlane, JK Rowling,
George R.R. Martin, Aaron McGruder, Twitter, Dave Willis, Dave Eggers, Jhonen Vasquez,
Katsuhiro Otomo, Brian Michael Bendis, Gao Xingjian, Dai Sato. These writers defined the
current generation of storytellers, in some way or another. I'm a bit of a writer myself. I'll say this
much though: No one pays me to write things. Most of these writers are fairly skilled at writing
something. And getting paid to do so for the most part.
I've figured out why I haven't been drawing enough comics pages, or at least not as many as
sequential artists (i.e. cartoonists) more proficient than myself (and yes, they do exist). I talk and
write too much. Talking and writing is and can be helpful. But the way I rely on those forms of
expression so much, it detracts from my art. Often if I get inspiration I'll babble about my desire
to manifest that inspiration to my mom or dad, but especially mom. That creative impulse has
continually been channeled into something verbal and linguistic in the past, when it should have
been getting channeled into a new comic book page. I tested that theory out earlier tonight, of
less talk, more action, and it worked. I did a new comic book page EASILY.
Turns out the Library of Congress over in Washington, D.C. will be cataloguing all 150 Billion
Tweets in existence. That's pretty amazing. So I guess I am making history?
It's been weeks since I've left the house, with the exception of getting the mail. Kind of
depressing. But going out is so hard without any friends. There's no one there to bail me out.
Jesus H. Christ. Have I become so goddamn arrogant and pretentious that I actually have the
nerve to feel I don't need an editor, like, ever??? Why do I accept the first draft of everything I do
as the be-all-end-all Final Draft result. I need to work on that. No more of this "Only bothering to
write a first draft" shit.
It's 2:53. on a Wednesday afternoon. Damn. Where IS everybody!? Everyone's at work and
school. The online world feels deserted, like no one's using it.

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Chapter 13

P a g e | 653

Wednesday, January 16th, 2013,

You can't do Johnny the Homicidal Maniac if you're doing Blade of the Immortal.
And you can't do Blade of the Immortal if you're doing Johnny the Homicidal Maniac.
You generally have to take one style or the other, and go with it.
My comics from the way they're shaping up, look to be the content of Blade of the immortal,
drawn with Jhonen style artwork.
I'm 29 years old, and the sad part is my parents still attempt to coerce me into seeing therapists
and social workers every month. I fucking hate that. I hate my therapist Jo Ann L. Cook, and I
hate my social worker Bryant Donovan. They're horrible, and I'd consider them more
malpractice-y than legit.
I don't really have any social power in person. No one yields to me, everybody just wants to stop
me and get in my way. People who are socially powerful don't have that kind of problem.
Everyone, including the mainstream media just yields to them. The enemy surrenders to them on
some level without ever bothering to fight them. they get zero resistance from everyone. No such
luck for me. I don't know of anyone who actually respects, admires or accommodates me, in any
actual real way really. My life is a cautionary tale of disrespect from nearly everyone I
encounter. So much for the credibility of being related to William the Conqueror. I certainly
don't feel like someone at that level of status. Mostly because I'm NOT someone with that level
of status. People cuss at me from across the fence, and everytime I cuss back at them, my mom
yells at me to stop being so nasty. What does she call their behavior anyway? I react to their
disrespect with equal disrespect, and I get punished emotionally. They never get punished for
their words. No one ever puts them in their place. They just get to run amuck and treat everyone
they encounter with profound DISrespect. It's an injustice. A very BIG injustice. I guess around
here, in Casselberry, Florida being a potty-mouthed disrespectful bully pays and no one punishes
you for being a bully. Not even my own adoptive mother.

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Friday, January 18th, 2013,

I've figured out one of my biggest problems: Linking the right and left hemispheres of my brain.
Integrating Left Brain / Right Brain. Integrating Words & Pictures, or Story & Art. Or making
art out of my stories
One technique that I actually got from my dad of all people (and it was actually good advice, for
a change) is a new right-left brain exercise that incorporates this new right-left brain integration
I've been striving for. That would be:
Pick a picture, any picture, whether art or photograph, whether my art or someone else's, out of
the trillions of images there are out there, put the image in a blank word processor document, and
write an essay or third-first person story narrative about the image, so I can get used to seeing
what I write about in my stories and prose.
That advice is surprisingly very creative, especially considering my Dad was the one who
brainstormed it and thought it up somehow. Now that I've tried this technique a few times, I've
found it to be easy, efficient, and effective, even if my mind does draw a blank at first. The
creator and artist-writer's block doesn't really last all that long as long as I'm combining art AND
writing.
This is a dilemma. I want to start my own business. But then again I also don't want to end up
$15k in debt to lenders if my business startup goes under. I don't have that kind of money. I don't
know if I ever will.
I have some options open to me now, apparently. I can stay with YouTube, and try to make
something of myself that way, I can continue producing comics and illustrative fiction, or a
combination of the two until I've completed a book a few years from now, I can write some
more TV Scripts, OR I can pursue a 15k business loan and actually seriously pursue my dream
business idea.
Saturday, January 19th, 2013,
I like being the Coolest Guy In The Room. I love being cool. Being cool is awesome.
You never quite value how awesome it is to be awesome until you witness the horrors of being
uncool. Just like you don't like God until you've had a brush with death.
When they say "Be Careful What You Wish For. You Just Might Get It"
That definitely describes my career aspirations. One of my first professional goals I ever aspired
to was to be a "Published multimedia author with a big audience" On some level I attained and
achieved all these things. But it wasn't in anywhere near the same context I imagined it to be. I

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self-published, and got some amateur multi-media done. But not enough to make anyone other
than my friends and mom respect me. I also publish just about every day on the internet. But I
don't get paid anything for it, which was a letdown, big time.
BUTT-HEAD
Huh Huh Huh. Cool. I "matter".
----Sunday, January 21st, 2013,
I just realized, I'm actually pretty heavily envied by other people. Because of my high
competence as an engineer, broadcaster, artist, author, entrepreneur, and writer, many people
envy my high levels of competence. They secretly hope to find something that will "make me
mediocre again". Ain't gonna happen. It hasn't yet, and if it hasn't yet, it never will. Haters gonna
hate. Tite Kubo can hate all he wants, but at the end of the day I'm more productive and prolific
than he'll EVER be with his little Bleach thing or whatever, with words if nothing else. He's mad
jealous. Mad jealous because he can't keep up with THIS. Better luck next series, Kubo. Just try
not to do anything desperate like crucify and kill me off at the end of one of your lame-o comics
or anything. Thanks. Bye! Lame.
-----Monday, January 21st, 2013,
Barack Hussein Obama's 2nd Inaugural Address
"Vice President Biden, Mr. Chief Justice, Members of the United States Congress, distinguished guests, and
fellow citizens: Each time we gather to inaugurate a president, we bear witness to the enduring strength of our
Constitution. We affirm the promise of our democracy. We recall that what binds this nation together is not the
colors of our skin or the tenets of our faith or the origins of our names. What makes us exceptional what
makes us American is our allegiance to an idea, articulated in a declaration made more than two centuries
ago: We hold these truths to be self-evident, that all men are created equal, that they are endowed by their
Creator with certain unalienable rights, that among these are Life, Liberty, and the pursuit of Happiness.
Today we continue a never-ending journey, to bridge the meaning of those words with the realities of our time.
For history tells us that while these truths may be self-evident, they have never been self-executing; that while
freedom is a gift from God, it must be secured by His people here on Earth. The patriots of 1776 did not fight to
replace the tyranny of a king with the privileges of a few or the rule of a mob. They gave to us a Republic, a
government of, and by, and for the people, entrusting each generation to keep safe our founding creed. For
more than two hundred years, we have. Through blood drawn by lash and blood drawn by sword, we learned
that no union founded on the principles of liberty and equality could survive half-slave and half-free. We made
ourselves anew, and vowed to move forward together. Together, we determined that a modern economy
requires railroads and highways to speed travel and commerce; schools and colleges to train our
workers. Together, we discovered that a free market only thrives when there are rules to ensure competition
and fair play. Together, we resolved that a great nation must care for the vulnerable, and protect its people
from lifes worst hazards and misfortune.
Through it all, we have never relinquished our skepticism of central authority, nor have we succumbed to the
fiction that all societys ills can be cured through government alone. Our celebration of initiative and enterprise;

P a g e | 656
our insistence on hard work and personal responsibility, are constants in our character. But we have always
understood that when times change, so must we; that fidelity to our founding principles requires new responses
to new challenges; that preserving our individual freedoms ultimately requires collective action. For the
American people can no more meet the demands of todays world by acting alone than American soldiers could
have met the forces of fascism or communism with muskets and militias. No single person can train all the
math and science teachers well need to equip our children for the future, or build the roads and networks and
research labs that will bring new jobs and businesses to our shores. Now, more than ever, we must do these
things together, as one nation, and one people.
This generation of Americans has been tested by crises that steeled our resolve and proved our resilience. A
decade of war is now ending. An economic recovery has begun. Americas possibilities are limitless, for we
possess all the qualities that this world without boundaries demands: youth and drive; diversity and openness;
an endless capacity for risk and a gift for reinvention. My fellow Americans, we are made for this moment, and
we will seize it so long as we seize it together. For we, the people, understand that our country cannot
succeed when a shrinking few do very well and a growing many barely make it. We believe that Americas
prosperity must rest upon the broad shoulders of a rising middle class. We know that America thrives when
every person can find independence and pride in their work; when the wages of honest labor liberate families
from the brink of hardship. We are true to our creed when a little girl born into the bleakest poverty knows that
she has the same chance to succeed as anybody else, because she is an American, she is free, and she is
equal, not just in the eyes of God but also in our own. We understand that outworn programs are inadequate to
the needs of our time.
We must harness new ideas and technology to remake our government, revamp our tax code, reform our
schools, and empower our citizens with the skills they need to work harder, learn more, and reach higher. But
while the means will change, our purpose endures: a nation that rewards the effort and determination of every
single American. That is what this moment requires. That is what will give real meaning to our creed. We, the
people, still believe that every citizen deserves a basic measure of security and dignity. We must make the
hard choices to reduce the cost of health care and the size of our deficit. But we reject the belief that America
must choose between caring for the generation that built this country and investing in the generation that will
build its future. For we remember the lessons of our past, when twilight years were spent in poverty, and
parents of a child with a disability had nowhere to turn. We do not believe that in this country, freedom is
reserved for the lucky, or happiness for the few. We recognize that no matter how responsibly we live our lives,
any one of us, at any time, may face a job loss, or a sudden illness, or a home swept away in a terrible storm.
The commitments we make to each other through Medicare, and Medicaid, and Social Security these
things do not sap our initiative; they strengthen us.
They do not make us a nation of takers; they free us to take the risks that make this country great. We, the
people, still believe that our obligations as Americans are not just to ourselves, but to all posterity. We will
respond to the threat of climate change, knowing that the failure to do so would betray our children and future
generations. Some may still deny the overwhelming judgment of science, but none can avoid the devastating
impact of raging fires, and crippling drought, and more powerful storms. The path towards sustainable energy
sources will be long and sometimes difficult. But America cannot resist this transition; we must lead it. We
cannot cede to other nations the technology that will power new jobs and new industries we must claim its
promise. That is how we will maintain our economic vitality and our national treasure our forests and
waterways; our croplands and snowcapped peaks. That is how we will preserve our planet, commanded to our
care by God. Thats what will lend meaning to the creed our fathers once declared. We, the people, still believe
that enduring security and lasting peace do not require perpetual war. Our brave men and women in uniform,
tempered by the flames of battle, are unmatched in skill and courage. Our citizens, seared by the memory of
those we have lost, know too well the price that is paid for liberty.
The knowledge of their sacrifice will keep us forever vigilant against those who would do us harm. But we are
also heirs to those who won the peace and not just the war, who turned sworn enemies into the surest of
friends, and we must carry those lessons into this time as well. We will defend our people and uphold our
values through strength of arms and rule of law. We will show the courage to try and resolve our differences
with other nations peacefully not because we are nave about the dangers we face, but because engagement
can more durably lift suspicion and fear. America will remain the anchor of strong alliances in every corner of
the globe; and we will renew those institutions that extend our capacity to manage crisis abroad, for no one has
a greater stake in a peaceful world than its most powerful nation. We will support democracy from Asia to

P a g e | 657
Africa; from the Americas to the Middle East, because our interests and our conscience compel us to act on
behalf of those who long for freedom. And we must be a source of hope to the poor, the sick, the marginalized,
the victims of prejudice not out of mere charity, but because peace in our time requires the constant advance
of those principles that our common creed describes: tolerance and opportunity; human dignity and justice.
We, the people, declare today that the most evident of truths that all of us are created equal is the star that
guides us still; just as it guided our forebears through Seneca Falls, and Selma, and Stonewall; just as it guided
all those men and women, sung and unsung, who left footprints along this great Mall, to hear a preacher say
that we cannot walk alone; to hear a King proclaim that our individual freedom is inextricably bound to the
freedom of every soul on Earth. It is now our generations task to carry on what those pioneers began. For our
journey is not complete until our wives, our mothers, and daughters can earn a living equal to their efforts. Our
journey is not complete until our gay brothers and sisters are treated like anyone else under the law for if we
are truly created equal, then surely the love we commit to one another must be equal as well.
Our journey is not complete until no citizen is forced to wait for hours to exercise the right to vote. Our journey
is not complete until we find a better way to welcome the striving, hopeful immigrants who still see America as
a land of opportunity; until bright young students and engineers are enlisted in our workforce rather than
expelled from our country. Our journey is not complete until all our children, from the streets of Detroit to the
hills of Appalachia to the quiet lanes of Newtown, know that they are cared for, and cherished, and always safe
from harm. That is our generations task to make these words, these rights, these values of Life, and
Liberty, and the Pursuit of Happiness real for every American. Being true to our founding documents does
not require us to agree on every contour of life; it does not mean we will all define liberty in exactly the same
way, or follow the same precise path to happiness. Progress does not compel us to settle centuries-long
debates about the role of government for all time but it does require us to act in our time. For now decisions
are upon us, and we cannot afford delay. We cannot mistake absolutism for principle, or substitute spectacle
for politics, or treat name-calling as reasoned debate. We must act, knowing that our work will be imperfect.
We must act, knowing that todays victories will be only partial, and that it will be up to those who stand here in
four years, and forty years, and four hundred years hence to advance the timeless spirit once conferred to us in
a spare Philadelphia hall. My fellow Americans, the oath I have sworn before you today, like the one recited by
others who serve in this Capitol, was an oath to God and country, not party or faction and we must faithfully
execute that pledge during the duration of our service.
But the words I spoke today are not so different from the oath that is taken each time a soldier signs up for
duty, or an immigrant realizes her dream. My oath is not so different from the pledge we all make to the flag
that waves above and that fills our hearts with pride. They are the words of citizens, and they represent our
greatest hope. You and I, as citizens, have the power to set this countrys course. You and I, as citizens, have
the obligation to shape the debates of our time not only with the votes we cast, but with the voices we lift in
defense of our most ancient values and enduring ideals. Let each of us now embrace, with solemn duty and
awesome joy, what is our lasting birthright. With common effort and common purpose, with passion and
dedication, let us answer the call of history, and carry into an uncertain future that precious light of freedom.
Thank you, God Bless you, and may He forever bless these United States of America."

-----The Presidential Ceremony has been pretty good so far. Essentially it's what you would expect to
happen. I'm no political commentator, so I'm probably not going to write a whole lot on the
political science and strategy of that speech, but it was the highlight of the event, as many of
Obama's speeches tend to be. This one, on Martin Luther King Jr. Day, felt particularly
passionate. The Audience may have been not as big as his first Inaugural address, but it was still
an epic amount of people. There was more space to move around in the audience, but there was
still at least 700,000 people there.
------

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Art Talk Resumes:

There's really only 1 good way to learn art. You have to teach yourself to draw. This takes raw
hard work. There's no escaping laborious effort and real painful work. There's no escaping some
pain as an artist. As an artist you have no choice but to work and feel some, discomfort. Maybe
even a lot of pain and discomfort. Because drawing is a form of mental and physical exercise. No
pain no gain.
I'm currently in the process of financing a Tech Startup, using the very elements that made me so
incredibly successful on YouTube in the past. Uploading is kind of my thing. YouTube put a
twist on the one element I mastered accidentally and got rich off of it, so in one sense
they...totally ripped me off, which is part of the reason I'm founding my own company. Not to
compete with them, but to practice taking my uploading know-how to the next level.
In a complete coincidence, Martin Luther King Jr. Day ended up being the Day I made the
decision to risk going into business for myself, and found my own startup. I've got a lot to learn.
YouTube and Veoh may not have fairly compensated me with rare exceptions, but they did
provide valuable work experience in the Tech Industry. It was kind of like being an intern for
YouTube. That, or an unofficial employee.
I should really return that call to a professional lender ASAP, but like a lot of my major financial
decisions, my parents are literally BEGGING to try to have a sit down with me before I commit.
This IS my decision though, so ultimately it's going to be me who says "yes" or "no". And I've
already decided on "yes" to a 15k+ business capital loan. The site will be worldwide, available in
6 continents. Well, eventually it will anyway. I'm building the site because this is the kind of site
YouTube never made that I'd really like to see get built.
Well, I'm calling back my lender tomorrow, so he can gage my situation and give me some input.
I'm also probably going to be setting up an office with a desk in the garage of my house, after I
renovate and refurbish it a little bit. Unless I find more room in my room or the computer room,
starting an office anywhere other than the garage is unlikely. If my operation expands and I have
enough money, I'll lease a public garage in Orlando or Winter Park somewhere. Mrs. Jo Ann has
a nice office. I wonder if they lease any of that space in that area. I'm going to eventually need a
base of operations for my dot-com startup.
Tuesday, January 22nd, 2013,
Probably one of the best things about my new job is I'm not directly competing with any of the
corporate juggernauts. My tech is innovative, it always has been, so the originality and novelty of
my tech building style makes it easier to compete.

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When I was young, somewhere around the age of 15 to 17, I began to fear the possibility of
things taking a turn for the worst. I'd run and fret over nightmare scenarios running through my
head of living (and not surviving very long) on the streets of my local city. That fear, the fear of
poverty and homelessness, has motivated me to make a living somehow. I don't want to make
money for greed or power. I just want to make money so I'm not living a nightmare, and so I can
survive when my adoptive parents pass away, so I'll still have somewhere to live, here if
nowhere else. At the very least if I don't move out, I'd probably eventually want to pay off the
mortgage for this house.
I've documented a whole SHITload of my thought and analysis process. I wonder if I should
continue with such a system. Documenting my thought process probably just slows me down.

Wednesday, January 23rd, 2013,

Am currently in the process of applying for a five figure loan. Finally I'm investing in myself.
Currently, my potential budget is over 25k. Financially speaking, I'm in the best shape of my life
thus far. I'm not rich, but I'm retain a respectable financial level. More than what a lot of people
have, even if it is on the low end of high financing. It's still a lot by a normal person's (i.e. my)
standards.
Animation, even anime, was not always this culturally, socially, and economically powerful.
Same goes for comics and manga. The barrier to entry and competition is as thick as the friggin
Great Wall of China.
One good reason to go into business for yourself is the fact that you get to meet new people.
Sometimes lots of them. And maybe even make some new friends.
Wow. That voice actress, Tara Strong is like my on screen female equivalent. Friendly, likeable,
confident, open minded, and versatile. She does kind of capture something about my character in
her on screen persona...
I'm not really founding a product based company. I'm founding a service based business. A
website that provides a specific service for people. It has a handful of very specific, very
beneficial, useful, and fun functions. Like other sites before me, I'm not just striving to make my
company useful. I'm also striving to make it entertaining and enjoyable, assuming the user likes
to have fun during their web experience.
Thursday, January 24th, 2013,
I definitely feel that after reading today's headlines on Time.com, Obama, the CIA, U.S.
Military, and FBI REALLY need to step up their Korea game. I think we know which Korea.
Starts with an "N".

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Friday, January 25th, 2013,

Here's a message I wrote in an email to a friend, to explain my long term business and career
ambitions.
"Thanks, here's some other ideas to help explain where I'm coming from:
I like manufacturing. and publishing things online, and building things, and streaming video.
Ever since I succeeded on YouTube, I've been eager to take that knowledge not everyone else has, and
use it to my advantage, as both a builder, designer, and engineer-entrepreneur.
I dream of one day being a key player in the future of streaming video, whether it's a storage website of
streaming video, or a micro-hardware PC specializing in it. I'd love to be the Steve Wozniak or Mark
Zuckerberg of streaming video. Ambitious I know, but I've always believed if you're gonna dream big, aim
for the very top..."

I want to be a tech builder and manufacturing auteur. Uploading video online, and Streaming
Video Digitally is an art. It's an art form with many creative and business possibilities. I have a
strong desire to explore those possibilities.
My favorite art forms: Animation Production Art, Comic Books, Books, Streaming Video,
Journaling, Power, Technology, Science, Spirituality, Philosophy, Design, Conceptual Design,
Engineering, Manufacturing, Business, Entrepreneurship, Video ripping, Choreography and
movement.
Generally, the people with the most videos to upload are the giant conglomerate media
companies, like, say, Square Enix, or FUNimation. A typical young adult only has a handful of
videos, unless they collect videos on their PC as a hobby the way I do.
There should be a pay scale on commercial service industry websites to accommodate these
needs and differences. Pricing, or how much I pay should be based on how much money and
video files I actually have in my possession.
-----I'm building an entity separate from Toonami, Adult Swim, Cartoon Network, Pixar, Google,
YouTube, DeviantART, Anime, Japan, Comics, Webcomics, Hollywood, and Twitter. Safely
outside of these chaotic hubs. I'm kind of operating in a little bubble. Okay, maybe not that little.
I'm starting my own business operation. Technically being a business owner makes you more
powerful.
Every day builds up to the future. Every day builds up to the next.

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In the past, I put every last ounce of my energy, power, and abilities into achieving something as
a cartoonist and animation worker. In the end, it still didn't even make a dent, in the culture, OR
my career in the industry. I've all but given up. I realize, I have a TON of Power. And yet all the
power and energy I've had access to still ended up being insufficient. It still never got me a
paying job in animation OR comics. Did I spread myself too thin? Did I do anything wrong at
all?
"Keep Moving Forward"
For now I'll just keep moving forward, and keep watching Meet the Robinsons from Disney, and
Cloudy With A Chance of Meatballs from Sony. I like cartoons about inventors and young
scientists. It's a reminder of what I'm striving for. I enjoyed those films quite a bit, for their
compassionate and empathic view of the NT Rational. Any Rational could be proud of the stories
of those movies. Both are based on storybooks, and both are films about struggling scientific
wizkids and young inventors. I like that about them. I never watched The Social Network. I felt it
was a contrived Hollywood-izing and watering down of the true nature of Silicon Valley.
I wish I could say one could succeed on training alone. But a lifetime and isolation won't turn
you into an artist if you're an INTP. No matter HOW hard you train. It will always be other
people who succeed. I worked long and hard, but for what exactly. All that momentum I had
going, and I choked and flubbed it.
Tuesday, January 29th 2013,
I definitely DON'T have a desire to work in TV animation anymore. Not because I lack the skill,
but because THEY lack a lot of things I require to work, namely tolerance and content quality. I
don't like Cartoon Network very much, or where it's headed. Or even where it is right now, for
that matter. I'm a Google Man. Fuck Time Warner and Cartoon Network. Nazis. Same thing with
many others.
My family's going to be completely gone for a while. For a long time. A least a month or two
they'll be out of my hair for. Better make the best of it, I suppose.
Social phobia and anxiety somehow doesn't feel as tangible in the online community. After all, if
my own mother doesn't recognize me from or in the internet and TV, which she honestly doesn't
seem to, then how would anyone else recognize me. Online conduct only feels real more
recently, what with "social media" and so-called "viral humiliation". I never actually felt
embarrassed about much of anything online or on TV as I never leave the house and a lot of
people don't count being online as real socialization. Including my brother.
Having second thoughts about what I'm going to do with my money.

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I put everything I had into my work, but ultimately I ended up with less respect from people than
I started off with. Something doesn't add up. Like how working harder than everyone else seems
to make me LESS respect, not more.
Due to how much people with more power than me try to abuse me, slander me, throw mud and
shit at me, and sabotage my goals, it's made me ruthless as hell. A real anti-hero. Not that I care.
Wednesday, January 30th, 2013,
Upon enlisting in a class made by Stanford University of Palo Alto, I've realized something upon
taking a class in algorithmic science, I've realized something I didn't know before. It helps to
know math. So as a result of this new self-knowledge, I'm resolving to at least attempt to refine
and improve my arithmetic and mathematical skills. Math is a fundamental concept in science,
business, and academics. I realize that now. Most if not all programmers and computer scientists
(with the exception of myself) know math and arithmetic. When I was young, I was diagnosed
with a math disability, which pretty much discouraged and crippled my interest and any potential
pursuits in the mathematical arts for the rest of my life...until now.
Currently there are 3 things on my to do list:
1. Educate myself in the algorithmic sciences in my online class with Stanford.
2. Learn basic math online.
3. Write Hypothetical Business Plans, for fun.
Things I enjoy designing:

Organic Architecture
Cityscapes
Hypothetical Electric Science-Fiction Generators

I enjoy designing hypothetical architecture and machinery. Hardware and Structures. Often very
large in scope.
Much like Bruce W. Timm wedded the simple angularity of the Disney film Sleeping Beauty
with the dynamic anatomical action of Alex Toth through his own design theories, so to do I
desire to create some type of production integration as well in my own work. Such as:

The angularity of Bruce Timm and Glen Murakami's newer Batman design and look.
The Organic Moebius-inspired Cyberpunk Science-Fantasy Generators and Tokyoinspired Architecture of Katsuhiro Otomo's AKIRA.
The Notan-exploiting Neo-Noir Black and White Design Aesthetic of comic book artists
such as Jhonen Vasquez, Mike Mignola, and Frank Miller.
The elaborate, cinematic costume design and atmospheric textures and production design
of Franco-Belgian (European) and Todd McFarlane comic books.

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The speed and frenetic violence and martial arts precision of Dragonball Z and Yu Yu
Hakusho.
Yes. That's pretty much it.

Thursday, January 31st, 2013,

So I've recently been learning about algorithms and asymptotic arrangement and analysis of
algorithmic-centric quadratic equations. Well, that's part of the curriculum anyway. Difficult,
esoteric things to understand. Yes algorithm science and design can be dense, complex, and hard
to understand. What with all the numbers and formulas. But it's fun learning this stuff. I love it! I
love the challenge of it, of programming and computer design. I want to learn it all. Leave no
number, equation, or programming language unturned.
I've been fascinated by algorithms for a long time now, a good 4 to 7 months. I'm very fascinated
by the science and structure of algorithms. How they almost feel like a form of artificial
intelligence. Programming a piece of computer software to automate reasoning, sequencing,
counting, and categorizing. The Windows Media Player Video Playlist was only an introductory
exercise. I can't wait to learn more complex and automatic things, like the automated counting of
numbers. data structures or various types of computer files.
Not all video playback algorithms have the same playback endurance. If one playback sequence
differs from other playback sequences in a video playback, I call this a "time variable". IF
playback lasts for 2 seconds, THEN "playback variable" = 2 seconds. IF [the] playback of a
video stream lasts 2 HOURS, THEN "playback variable" = 2 hours. Time variable is the
unknown, the amount of time the playback sequence algorithm ultimately ends up occupying in
digital chronological algorithmic sequence.
Friday, February 1st, 2013,
Studying computers and art, is similar to studying martial arts, zen, and science. There is science
to every art and art to every science, from computer programming to Chi Energy.
I've contemplated thoughts of quitting at my comics and animation studies more times than I can
count. But that's the equivalent of suicide. It's dangerous and irresponsible. Quitting is
dangerous. Giving up is dangerous. Learning is never finished. Studying textbooks and studying
under Teachers, and Mentors of senior rank never ends.
On Confidence: Comparing Confidence in Martial Arts Forms to Drawing Forms.
Art is partially a Performing Art.
A True Master of Art is not a slave to his process. He commands his art. His art doesn't
command him. A True Artist has Command of his Talent and Skill, and can Work on the spot in
the moment, every time, and any time. Drawing a truly good artwork on the spot every time he

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sits down to create. If he needs assistance and aid from reference material of any kind, that's
okay, as long as he's producing "on the spot", daily, he's doing his job as an artist.

Just as a martial artist can perform moves and combinations on the spot...
So to can an artist produce good art on the spot, with or without an audience.
Enough practice, training, and discipline will give an artist command over his power and
skills.

Now that I've overcome performance drawing anxiety, I can focus on refining my skills.
Bruce Lee taught that you shouldn't focus on what you don't know how to do, and what you're
not naturally gifted at. Pick the things, what you do know how to do, and master those. When
you master what you do know how to do, you can outshine 5,000 competitors who can do what
you don't know how to, because you've mastered the skill you already know how to do that
much.
Going off of what Bruce Lee said, you have to know your strengths and exploit them and expand
upon them. You have to realize A) Not every drawing you do will be perfect, or even good, and
B) You'll never master everything. But most artists get good at something. Instead of trying to
mimic the perfections of others as I once attempted to do with Moebius and Katsuhiro Otomo, it
is important to know and respect your own limitations, and respect those limitations by working
within them. If Bruce Lee is able to respect this rule, shouldn't anyone else?
---Saturday, February 2nd, 2013,
Upon almost starting an online business with $40,000, sketching 22 pages of tricep-bicep
muscles, and taking part of an online class at Stanford University Online, and resuming studying
computer programming for a bit, and finally, reading the first few chapters of Leo Tolstoy's War
and Peace, seeking inspiration for my own War Saga, I've realized things are getting too boring
for me to continue to not write in my digital journal. Apparently talking to myself through the
written word is a nice boredom killer and keeps me occupied, so I don't have to stare at the walls
and ceiling, loafing about with the TV off and doing nothing all day. I can only rest on my
laurels for so long. Apparently it's a new plan every day.
Hearing people's emotions speaking to me is scary, cuz I can read minds, and most people seem
sad or angry. It's very unpleasant when people shout their emotional thoughts at me. Some
people's emotions outside my house are so NOISY!!! It's fucking horrible listening to my
neighbors' aggressive, hostile, sad, failed, and angry emotions all day long and trying not to be
affected by it. It feels like they're always screaming horrible things at me and I don't know why.

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Tweet marathon is on hiatus. As is the Blogging and YouTube marathon. I can't be everywhere
at once. That's not necessarily a rewarding activity.

To Vastly Summarize the Last Year or So, I'll compile a list.

Graphic Novel Trade

Anipipo
Sketch Journal
Titmouse
Ben Kalina
StonerGoth187
Toonami
Animation Magazine
Ramin Zahed
Pitch Party
Sandy
Re-Election
Obama
$40,000
Storage Website
Anipipo
Kickstarter
Stanford
Journal hiatus
"Media's Most Wanted Man", Vilified

Well, there is one area I haven't mastered, but am going to teach myself how to do better:
ACTION. FIGHTING. MARTIAL ARTS. ON PAPER. In STORYBOARD & SCRIPT FORM
I need to lay out some action scenes, and fight move combos. Study other fighting comics and
fighting shows / films / anime / manga if necessary. I didn't receive a recreational Stanford
Online Education for nothing. Drawing anatomically realistic fighting is hard. But not
impossible. It just takes a few thousand attempts.
OEL Fighting Manga:
My specialty. Like Japanese Fighting Shonen Manga, but American-Chinese-French.

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There's no such thing as an accidental comic book. Every comic book we see is an artist drawing
on his subject matter talents, skills, niches, masteries, and specialties. What we see in print is but
a fraction of what the creator put in his sketchbooks. Every published book is 1/10th of the
amount of rough sketches and sketchbook drawings the cartoonist-creator-artist sees. Every piece
of art had to be drawn by somebody. If its art, somebody had to draw it.
Very little of what I draw is simply "made up". Most of what I draw that actually makes any
sense and has a designy feel to it is based on what I see in front of me, or what I see in my mind's
eye. I just copy what I see, especially if where I see it is in my mind's eye. If I have nothing to
look at, in my mind, at my desk, at my clipboard, or elsewhere, I don't draw. Most of what I
design is based on other art of various forms.
Things my career has given me:
Money
Fame
Power
An Audience
An International Audience
Sex
Friendship

Influence
Ubiquity
Popularity
Status
Admiration
-----I finally got a DVD-ROM Drive for my laptop that finally works again. FINALLY. I must have
waited a year or longer to replace that broken DVD-ROM drive. Now I can finally resume my
ripping work in the ripping mines. And I can go back to renting, ripping, and returning. Huzzah!
One of the first DVDs I got to work watching was a title I've wanted to watch for years:
Yukikaze. A Military SF mini-series OVA. Very cool.
-----Monday, February 4th, 2013,
I used to like Cerebus and JtHM more than I do. The thing is, I'm starting to like stuff like
Spawn, Akira, and Blade of the Immortal and other fighting manga better. Cerebus and JtHM
don't seem to have enough action to keep my attention. And if I want to study dialogue, I'll study

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A Drifting Life by Yoshihiro Tatsumi. Simple art, but great dialogue compositions. Also Blade
of the Immortal has good dialogue scenes. As does Akira and Spawn.
My goal is to Executive Produce Parallax, which is loosely based on End Times. I do both
animation and comics design work, so if anyone can keep the design template of Parallax & End
Times consistent, it would be me. Just like Jhonen, Timm, and Otomo. They have the 3 most
consistent design adaptation styles. Their design look in terms of a TV/Film Comics Transition is
essentially unchanged. It takes a lot of polish to do a transition that's that successful. But they're
storyboard artists, screenwriters, and production designers. Most good Executive ProducerCartoonists are. Being an auteur is important
"The composition BG boxes are your friend."
Yes, I'm going to start drawing more comic book page layouts with BG Angles-and-Boxes in
them.
Wow, I had no idea all anime was painted digitally nowadays. Apparently cells are never painted
by hand in Japan anymore. whether it's BONES or Production I.G.
The vast majority of cells in animation drawn by animators are painted digitally. So apparently
the stuff we see on DeviantART is a reasonable facsimile of what's being produced
professionally. No more pen and ink, no more tube paint. No more VHS.
Japan, South Korea, and France are the new Kings of Traditional Animation. America has been
dethroned. From now on, I'm only seeking animation and comic book inspiration from: A)
Superheroes, B) Indie Comics, C) Webcomics, D) Manga, E) Japanese anime, F) French Copros.
Oh yes. I am the best manga artist currently working in the United States. This is not an opinion.
These are facts. Ha ha! I'm the best, bitches! There are no white manga artists better than me. Or
any Arab ones either. French and Chinese and Japanese, yeah, those guys are better I suppose.
But none of them live locally. I'm certainly the best manga artist in Florida, if not the entire
United States. I really couldn't care less if someone disagrees. Fuck someone. I'm the greatest
artist there is. In one of the best countries there is. I'm proud of being the best in the West, and
yes, I AM full of myself. But I deserve to be. You're not better than me, and neither is any other
artist in America. I've already proven that. Most American manga doesn't look like the artist is
even bothering to try. I try, and of course I do. I'm the best. And I love being the best, and
putting the rest to shame. I relish my superiority of being bigger and better. "Tougher than the
Best. Stronger Than The Rest. Hate on it if you want, Dad."
Every sketch I draw is the greatest drawing in the history of modern comics. Every line I put
down is a masterpiece. Yes, my confidence definitely seems to be recovering. Criticism kind of
goes in one ear and out the other. And I wouldn't have it any other way. I like being an arrogant

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genius filmmaker-cartoonist-producer. I'm a better artist than MOST artists. And I'll be the first
to tell you that.

Tuesday, February 5th, 2013,

Series Status:

Sin City: Retired

Scud: Retired
JtHM: Retired
Cerebus: Retired
Spawn: Not Perfect Anymore
AKIRA: Complete
Blade of the Immortal: Soon To Be Retired

Which proves the following hypothesis:

All Continuing or Transient Series Are Limited. All Series are Limited.
All Series Must End. They Must End Somewhere. They Must Have a Stopping Point.
Whether it's 2 issues or 600. All Stories End. The only thing that goes forever as a nonstop series
is this Journal, the Manifesto series.
Manga is a trend in America. A Fad. The Fashion of the day. It'll die off and fail at being popular
soon enough. If it hasn't already. I'm a comic book artist. Not a manga artist. At least in
American comics I have the freedom to draw however I want, and not conform to the styles of
the day, as most if not all manga artists do. Fractals and silhouettes are very UN-manga.
----Wednesday, February 6th, 2013,
I may or may not return to webcomics. If I get enough work done, and have a story of some sort
to work with, I might.

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Finished 9 pages of wordless sequential art in a day. All of those pages were made up and
original. That's my newest record. So I'm definitely considering making an effort to develop a
story to lead the comics pages.
I'm regaining confidence in my abilities as a sequential artist, which is great. I needed that.
Sometimes being confident is my best defense against flat out lies and bullshit people like to
spew from their rectum-mouths about me.
Drawing is like playing with a construction set. You have to build it up, over time by creating
and building each piece from scratch and combining each mastered piece until you have whole
working composition and panel System within a Comic Book Page.
Thursday, February 7th, 2013,
I appear to be making a habit out of drawing practice comic book pages, and practicing the art of
sequential art comics in general. I'm happy about this. I drew 9 pages yesterday, and 3 pages
today. It's fun drawing comics pages with a sharpie marker. It has a certain feel and manga
texture to it that I really love.
By now I've done 160 pages of comics panels, or "sequential art". I'm on my way. I'm always
striving to make the art more dynamic, cleaner, more detailed, more action and design packed.
Among those pages, I've completed a total of 35 mostly-rough-or sloppy pages that happen to be
completely original work that isn't dojinshi of other comics, and isn't copies of other creator's
page layouts, which I've been known to sketch out when I get really blocked or stumped.
Friday, February, 8th, 2013,
Another 3 rough pages complete, for today. Got a pretty good rhythm and pace going. I'm
meeting my self-assigned quota. I'm keeping them unrefined for now, with the exception of
sketching them out on a large scale in the panels. I haven't scanned any of my work for 2 days.
I'm falling behind kind of?
I've noticed my daily comics pages seem to be taking on a life of their own. By now, things like
sci-fi backgrounds, dialogue layouts, and conversation speech-bubble-using dialogue are
beginning to find their way into some of my pages. I'll see if I can make a habit out of this. It's
almost like my pages are beginning to take on a life of their own. My characters are coming to
life on the page right as I draw them before my very eyes. More and more of my pages are
beginning to narrate events and tell stories, through props, backgrounds, and the speech and
actions of the characters. I don't feel entirely in control of what happens in my comics stories
anymore. I just jot the images down on the panels. It almost feels like my paper's possessed.
That's why storytelling is cool.
Can I actually picture myself working in an animation studio. Well, whether the honest to Gosh
answer turns out to be "yes" or "no", comics is the real proving ground. That's pretty much how

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it goes. You must prove yourself as a capable filmmaker and storyteller on the page before you
can tell stories for the small or big screen. I don't have any current plans to work in live action
Hollywood. Just television and maybe theatrical animation. But before any of that happens, first
the comics must be built, edited, and revised so they can happen. Those will be the blueprints for
my career as a TV Exec, creator, visionary, pioneer, and showrunner. There's really no escaping
that element. I could get more work, but first I need to develop enough confidence in my abilities
to draw and write stories for novels and the comics page. I'm losing count of how many pages
I'm actually doing on average per week. A lot I guess.
In a way, Manifesto I & II is printed and self-published in a more structurally sound manner than
my End Times graphic mythos franchise. The paper quality is better, and it's not pixelated and
over-glossy or over-glossified in certain pagesand areas, like, say, everywhere. I'm trying to
attain a greater structural soundness and cohesiveness in my graphic comic book issues. But it
starts with the quality of the inks, doesn't it? Manifesto feels like a real book. End Times sort of
feels like a fake comic book. I want to change that and improve upon that. Comics pages look
better as PDF documents transferred from JPEGs. The scanned JPEG image is an art form unto
itself.
Saturday, February 9th, 2013,
"Landscapes of War"
I drew an experimental warzone sketch today. Militant Combat. Military Action and Activity. It's
rough but shows a clear vision. I'm very happy with it. It tells a story. This kind of drawing had
me defeated and stumped for the longest time. But after studying episodes of Gundam Wing
when they're fighting the war, and the episode of Invader Zim, from the Dib "Wonderful Life of
Doom" episode, where Dib is singlehandedly fighting the Irken Armada in deep space, it
influenced and inspired this, my first rough storyboard and panel of the End Times Wars:

Kick Ass, indeed. It's an amazing visionary start. I'm sure I'll do many, many sequel drawings to
it that build on top of it. But it really lays out the details and composition of the action. I'll
continue watching Invader Zim and Gundam Wing for inspiration, because that's where all my
layouts are coming from. It has a very "Lady Liberty Leading the People" vibe...but with Sci-Fi.

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That there is a miracle. I've mastered war landscapes like the Romantics. I've mastered the basics
and fundamentals of drawing a war scene.
I'm in the beginning, baby stages of drawing the End Times War Period of New-Earth Mythos.
This is visual representation of not just a backdrop for a speculative fiction war story narrative,
but the back story, and an essential component of my World Building Gifts, Talents, and Skills.
I really don't like how manga has become a cruising ground for horny teenage girls with an
anime fetish. So not into that, quite honestly. And if manga is their congregation point, I'll be
more than happy to draw my comics indoors, alone, in solitude with no one around, especially
not those people, and never share my comics outside of the things I self-publish through print on
demand. My comics are awesome without an audience too.
Sunday, February 10th, 2013,
Alternative American Comic Books I'm going to Buy:

Scott Pilgrim Box Set

Sin City Box Set
Valve Stories Trade
Usagi Yojimbo
Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles

Favorite international online media auteurs whose work I follow? I have 2 favorites currently: 1
an AMV filmmaker, and the other a web-manga self-publishing artist:

Broken Element (AMVs)

Raynart-Tradnor (indie manga)

I'd ad Daniel, or Stonergoth187, but she's more of a friend and graphic designer.
----

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Monday, February, 11th, 2013,

I'm tired of going mainstream. I'd much prefer to get back in touch with old friends who used to
talk to me all the time when they lived closer. Life kind of divided all of us and drove us all away
by unfair circumstance, despite out similarities of temperament and general social harmony we
possessed. I'm dying to get back in touch with Johnny B. and Chris. I've known Johnny since
middle school, and Chris since pre-school. They always said nice things. That's one thing the
rabid fans never did. I miss that. Johnny wanted to be a comic book artist when he was young
too. He was the only local who understood my desire to get big in comic books. I wish he was
still around. At least then I'd have someone to show my newer comics to. Someone who isn't a
doctor, teacher, or family. Johnny never drew as good as I did, and he gave up on drawing later
in life to pursue drumming full time. I just wish I knew what became of Johnny. I miss him a lot.
I miss Amanda, and Nicole too. Right now, I care about my friends a whole lot more than I care
about my so-called "fame". More like "infamy". I'm infamous in the media, not "famous". That's
why I don't care about the media as much as maintaining the actual real relationships I've already
ended up in. At least the friends I do have talk like real friends. All TV and internet does is pick
apart every little fucking thing in my life and take pot shots. Fans aren't friends.
I can count my greatest friends on one hand: Chris, Johnny, Amanda, Jason, Nicole. They all
remember me forever, and I remember them forever. I guess that's all that matters.
It gets hard to contain the violent Mongolian Warrior Impulses I inherited from my bloodline. I
wouldn't call it bloodlust, but I've definitely got a desire to fight, someone or something. I want
to punch my adoptive dad in the face after living with him for this long. I wish I could punch
Cary, very, very hard, but he'd use that as an excuse to throw the book at me. Too much of a
coward to actually fight me in real life. A cowardly piece of shit, fighting with words and
manipulation of the legal system as opposed to just using his fists like I do. A coward, and a
despicable Caucasian one at that. I really hate that guy.

P a g e | 673

Chapter 14

P a g e | 674

Tuesday, January 12th, 2013,

If you ask me, and of course, you did, my writing abilities have no peer. From animation to
comics, from screenwriting to short literary fiction. Perhaps my dream of being the Yoshiyuki
Tomino of American animation actually will come true, and I might even accomplish that goal
within this lifetime and not after it...assuming I can sell something.
I've decided I like my online Stanford class in Algorithmic Design & Analysis. It's not about
grades. It's about absorbing and learning the material. I'm not going to quit the class. I'll just do
my best. Algorithmic thinking is kind of my thing. If I don't take a class at Stanford online in it,
who will? I really wanted to give up a week or half-week ago. But I've decided against quitting.
Even if I fail at passing the tests and understanding the material, I'm still going to make the
effort. Stanford isn't for quitters. It's been too long since I've sought an education at a higher
level. I know I'm overtaxed and overloaded with work, but school and education is work.
Sometimes it's stressful and sometimes it's boring, but as long as your learning, that's what
matters.
The only mythos and literary universe I know how to write is the New-Earth Mythos, the End
Times Apocalyptic War Timeline. But I suppose this is a sufficient means to an end unto itself. I
have enough details to construct a plot, a timeline, a script outline, a script, and a story. In other
words, I'm able to do my job. Nice. I have enough power or chi to be an Action Factory.
I'm big on black culture and civil rights activism in the same way I like Asian and European
Culture. I like African-American Culture on certain levels. I like the struggle. Things like music,
funk, jazz, hip-hop, comedy, passion, soul, some TV Shows like The Boondocks and Black
Dynamite. Artists like LeSean Thomas and Aaron McGruder. For a guy who doesn't really
travel, or get out and about very much, I do in fact really like studying and writing about culture,
online and in essays, if nowhere else. I get a lot of comments on "how good his English and
vocabulary is", but considering my I.Q., and the high verbal and literary abilities of my mother
(she taught English in high school).
Infinite Kung-Fu by Kagan McLeod
(a Literary Review)
I got to see my first decent American-style wuxia and kung-fu, Chinese-hybrid Hong-Kong style
martial arts alternative comics, graphic novel epic. "Infinite Kung-Fu" It's like Avatar the Last
Airbender, but with less magic and more inky brushstrokes. In many ways, it achieves what I'm
going for at least in terms of fighting and martial arts on the page. There's a heavy cinematic
influence, to say nothing of the fact that the introduction was written by a Hong Kong martial
arts acting and stunt master who appeared in over 70 films in Hong Kong, along with a blurb by

P a g e | 675

one of the concept designers of The Matrix Trilogy. They all had ebullient praise for this
beautiful, masterful and perfect book. This archetype of graphic fiction. I can only hope End
Times can play catch up. He's 10 times more fluent in the art of producing sequential art than I
am. Infinite Kung Fu was distributed in digital format online on Top Shelf's website, and was
eventually collected into a 450 page graphic novel, which now that it's out of the package and
I've got a sense of the books weight, is pretty hefty. It's like Blankets, but with kung-fu, smoother
artwork, and more condensed. But still, I'd consider this the newest landmark American
accomplishment in the cinematic and literary martial arts, since RZA, Quentin Tarantino, Jackie
Chan, Jet Li, Ang Lee, and John Woo. There's no trenchcoats, popped collars, and sword-n-city
post-apocalyptic backdrop, but it does take place in a hypothetical future (like say, that of Conan
the Barbarian).
I give Infinite Kung-Fu, 4-out-of-5 Stars, For Execution and Style Alone.
---Wednesday, February 13th, 2013,
I sense there could be a conspiracy or secret power play and media effort among the local and
national authorities to keep me from LEAVING the local and national community and society.
It's possible there could be a conspiracy among my parents, and the Higher Ups to try to stop me
from traveling, getting out and about, not minding travel.
The airport could be conspiring to stop international travel, as opposed to increasing it. Just a
hunch. The fat cats want to stay fat.
It's a conspiracy by the government, rogue journalists, and the television and Hollywood elite.
They like traveling, but they're a bit hypocritical as they seem to fear me doing the same thing,
and have a desire to discourage and debilitate such exploration. Is it xenophobia? Or a desire to
keep the fat cats fat? We might not find out for a while.
Questions I must find the answer to:
What is the difference between chakra and chi?
Are publishers in France conspiring to keep Americans away from awareness of "authentic
French culture and comics". Is more "authentic" French culture being concealed from America in
favor of perpetuating negative PR and stereotypes?
I like women who are into:
Art. Literature. Writing. Psychic and New Age Abilities. Creativity. Anime and Manga.
If there's one thing I love discussing, it's the co-production industry online. But I don't get to
discuss it as much as, say, Japanese anime and manga.

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New Age Subject Matter:

Lightworker
Darkworker
Mysticism
Genius
Pantheism
Chi Ball
Chi
Medium
Channeler
PSI
Psychic
Empathic
Telepathy
Sensing Energy
Chi Aura Color
Nicole
Hospitalization
Brian Johnston
INTP
INFP
Scorpio
22 Master Builder
Healer
Meditation
Visionary
Art
Imagination
Premonition
Precognition
Vibes, Positive-Negative Energy
Power Levels
-----

P a g e | 677

Friday, February 15th, 2013,

This journal contains a lot of psychic talk. A lot of automatic reading and channeling. Very
paranormal. Most of my stories are about the paranormal.
I took stuff like Chris Carter's The X-Files to heart.
My psychic intuition is telling me to write stories about the supernatural, paranormal, mysticism,
adventure and travel, action, and martial arts. With maybe a small flavor of classic goth horror.
Hey, whatever happened to the days of sitting at the computer or drawings desk for hours on end,
and just sitting there even when I'm NOT Working, and waiting for the muse to launch a magical
nuclear imagination Apocalypse missile at my mind and hands? Honestly? Sometimes you gotta
sit there for hours and wait for the muse to drop ideas off at your desk. Bag ah magic.
Shows I'm planning on eventually watching: 24, Sopranos, X-Files, Twilight Zone, Gundam.
I desire more fictional drama and discontent. There's not enough conflict in my mind. I need to
create some more in my stories. A LOT more conflict. There's plenty of that shit in real world
people, almost everywhere in this world, so I guess the stories in the media and the people I
encounter (whether in person, the computer or television) are my inspiration. Including people
who bug and annoy me. They're going into the warzone and getting blown up by bombs first.
And maybe their children, too. Fiction is Hell. And there's plenty of Hell in Florida and the U.S.
media. Like those bratty twins on The Disney Channel. You just kind of want to shovel shit
down their throats. For STARTERS.
Don't worry, it's not me I have to let go. It's you. I really feel for ya, man....
The great thing about being a SF Fantasy writer is that there's a never ending supply of material
to write about. It doesn't matter whether good things OR bad things happen to me. I can write
about them both. Anything and everything, all events will result in story material for fantasy and
fiction. And something always is happening. Good story ideas just get handed over to me. It's
great. I can kill people and blow up buildings and make up fantastical creatures and things. That
never gets boring. But sometimes things happen at such a frequent rate, you forget what good
material they make for future stories.
I know what both the truth and the secret conspiracy truth is. But unfortunately it isn't the first
thing people want to hear.
For instance, I know when I'll succeed, and it's whenever my youth officially and biologically
ends. When I graduate from Young adulthood, and reach the age of 35 to 40 is when my actual
life will begin, in terms of figuring out my problems, and not a moment sooner. Gee I wonder
how much unplanned or needed horned up breeding and in-law inventing Andrew will

P a g e | 678

perpetuate until that year happens (between 2019 and 2024). Knowing how fucked up Andrew
and the like are, he'll go to jail or kill himself or something before then and some how try to
implicate me, but I'm anticipating this tragedy on his shortsighted part. He'll keep buying more
guns and having more hyperactive children.
Both my adoptive parents are biologically depressed.
Cary's overworking himself to a small paycheck and a shallow grave in Florida somewhere with
no insurance for me. He discourages communication of any sort unless it's very supportive of
him and domineering in nature
Peggy sits in a chair drinking red whine and cleaning and calling me a "Nasty" douchebag all
day. And then she sits, talks on her cell, plays solitaire, and drinks red whine some more, when
she isn't smoking in her bedroom with the door closed and the Ellen Dangerous show turned up
at full volume.
Cary and Peggy apparently didn't adjust to my maturation and attainment of independence very
well. They loved me as a kid, but as an adult they both reject and hate me. They're taking
advantage of me, using my time to use to their own advantage. So selfish. And spoiled.
------Saturday, February, 16th, 2013,
What exactly are discipline, self-discipline, and willpower? That means you have control and
command and power over your own body and/or mind, and can command and bend it at will. It
does whatever you choose to have it do. Like my automatic writing and sketching random
drawings. For the most part I have a lot of discipline (control) of that. Self-control is another
term for discipline and willpower.
There is some very, very, very, VERY BAD American manga out there. I typed in American
manga in Amazon, and I got a bunch of tutorial books, and one really shitty ass loser book that
upon closer inspection looks like it was "illustrated" by a 12 year old. Stay in school kids. Oh
wait, you're still in school. No wonder your comics are so bad. At least they have an excuse. I'd
rather watch Family Guy than read half the internet CRAP that's out there. Unfortunately, with
manga in America, the talent doesn't measure up to the fame of the medium. Japanese manga
started off being good. Same with French art. American manga started off being very, very bad.
Just horrible. Gawdawful. And the people who put this garbage out there are just oh-so-proud of
their drivel. Horrible. I want to burn those books. That's what happens when Tokyopop defines
everything with stupid assed contests. Contests ruined the manga industry. Made it a pointless
spectacle of failure and under-aged hack work. There's no market in Manga from Americans.
Scott Pilgrim and Avatar are independent comics, by Oni and Dark Horse. I guess all manga

P a g e | 679

artists in America are sitting on their ass watching Family Guy, WISHING they could get to
work, just like me.
Kindle's for people who don't know anything about actual real publishing
I can't assume all my fellow artists won't grow jealous of the fact that I'm friends with Jhonen,
Todd McFarlane, Steve Blum, Titmouse, and Katsuhiro Otomo. As far as the nobody know-italls online are concerned, I'm just some guy who's "overrated", "over-exposed" and got "lucky",
with no actual power or talent of his own. Blatantly false and baseless accusation, but haters
gonna hate. Of COURSE haters gonna hate. I guess those guys' bless, good word, and
recommendation isn't enough for people who put out fake, fraudulent comics, who don't have
such braggable power levels. For now, I just wait and bide my time. The market is a war zone,
and it's a World full of socio-pathic haters like Brian.
Monday, February 18th, 2013,
Hey all right! I finally got back in touch with Jonny. Tracked him down by looking up his
parents home number, got his email address from his dad, sent him and email and he sent me one
back. He's gonna phone me up tomorrow. I'm so stoked about that!!!!
Now that Jonny is back in contact with me, as a friend, he might make a valuable ally to me. At
least on a private level. I could see that happening. He's not as concerned with the ways of the
world as I am, and that's his strength. He's my kinda guy.
Currently listening to: Destroyed, by Moby, on Rhapsody.com for free. An album about
insomnia. Very moody and atmospheric, like everything in the middle of the night. I subscribe to
Rhapsody, so I hear new music weekly if not often daily as well.
I consider Jonny an Art Ally. The main artist I know in real life who doesn't bother me. Me and
Jonny get along very well. Most people don't have friends as good or happy as him. After all this
time, he seems just as happy as ever. Is he different, yes, but he's not worse off. Not the way I
am. Or at least it seems that way. I'm in dire need of some social interaction. The circumstances
and difficulties surrounding me, Chris, and Jonny are different, but their friendship with me
really hasn't changed. We still all seem to remain as positive and optimistic as ever, despite all
being bullied and tormented by the people surrounding us. Our bond has sustained us spiritually,
made it easier to endure the evils of this world. Our memories of each other have sustained us
through times of separation and loneliness. And that's what actual real friends do. TV displays a
false image of relationships and friendships, constantly promoting selfishness, sociopathology,
and catastrophic behavior and events. That's all bullshit. We're keeping it real. I'm keeping it real,
and my friends are keeping it real. Now it's going to be time to get down to business.
The point of scripts and novel manuscripts isn't achieving a final draft. It's editing, revision, and
reading. And the point of writing a script, is to build something out of it in comic book or

P a g e | 680

animated form. The point is revision, not polish and finish, or an illusion. The point is to NOT
STOP working, not to FINISH working!
YES! I talked to Jonny on the phone today for a few hours.
"The Rightful Order Has Been Restored."
-Gaz
Invader Zim
The real problem with Jonny's art creatively isn't his style or passion. It's his lack of confidence
in himself. In middle school, he let me know "I don't know if you know this but you were the
REAL Star Artist. If we were a band, I'd just be the backup guy singing or playing in the
background." The funny thing is I never saw it that way. I always viewed us as equal partners in
crime. I refuse to let him completely retire from art. He believes he never had high art abilities to
begin with, but I know better. And even if that is true, he responded very positively when I told
him I could give him art lessons, or just teach him how to draw like I and other artists do. "Well,
you're very strong in many ways. I could still use you as an art ally. It's a warzone out there. It
can get ruthless and hypercompetitive in the art world, and the deeper into the media world I got,
the more I got Attacked From All Sides. I've done plenty of bad drawings just as bad or worse
off than anything he's done. I was just too tenacious to quit and entirely discount my actual good
work over the years.
It's been such a long time since I've spoken to Jonny. So long that it almost felt like I was going
back in time when I first heard his voice on the phone after so long. So grown up, yet so familiar.
He's still a kid at heart, just like me. He always was incredibly positive. He bought Scud: The
Disposable Assassin: The Whole Shebang from Amazon.com too!
"I bought that book too! We must be reading each other's minds!" I said, to which he got a good
laugh out of.
I also spoke to another person far away and over the phone today. I spoke to a founder of a
psychic research institute in Texas. This guy has quite a story to tell.
And now, as I've recently deduced, I have an online audience of half a million people.
I dreamt last night of seeing mothers giving instant birth to new children time and time again,
floating in midair. That means my friendship with Jonny has been born anew, and risen from the
ashes of destruction and darkness. Through old ashes of darkness, evil, and suffering arises the
phoenix, born again, born anew, giving light to a new period of my life and a new day. My
audience is new to me, so Jonny in some ways is new to them, but not me. And then there's the
psychic institute I'll be lending my mind to in the near future for studies and maybe scientific

P a g e | 681

articles and books. The guy I was talking to today has a net worth of over $100 million, and it all
started with a psychic prediction his guru made for him many years ago.
The name of the Institute I've currently begun to be involved with is the Psychical Research
Foundation, and it was established in 1961 to study parapsychology and other certain PSI related
research and studies. I spoke of some of my more heavy autobiographical baggage in a phone
interview today. Now that the negative stuff is pretty much done being discussed about my more
harrowing experiences and unhappiest, most damaging times of my life in interview number 1,
I'm going to move onto the positive in interview number 2.
It's amazing to think I had long conversations with both Jonny and the Psychical Research
Foundation in the same afternoon and evening!
Themes close to my heart:

God
Family
Friends
Parents
Home
Work and Career

Tuesday, February 19th, 2013,

There's really no limit to what you can do with the right art and drawing supplies (grid paper,
bristol board, graphite pencil, erasers, ruler, pens, sharpies, Microsoft Digital Image Pro software
for Windows, Manga Studio), a bit of patience, a lot of quiet free time, high levels of energy,
good habitual drawing behavior, focus, concentration, and hard work. Just get really good at
drawing what you already know how to draw.
I'm off to a good start. I'm working on comics pages and panels, both in terms of pencilling them
and inking them. And my work is improving. A whole lot.
I'm also getting some serious fiction writing down. Those fiction writing prompts I had stashed
away in my word processor archive, worked like a charm. Now I have an all new storyline
thought up, along with part of an outline for a short story and/or comic book series
script/manuscript written.
It's been a very productive, very work heavy day. Ever since I called Jonny on the phone and
drank a 5 hour energy and some Diet Sunkist, I've been working like crazy!
From now on, I'm picking 1 thing and mastering it. That is my new years resolution. To do what
Phil wanted me to do all along, "Pick 1 Thing, and Be Really, Really Good At It"

P a g e | 682

I'm gonna be a screenwriter. I'm gonna be a pro writer. I'm going pro. Eventually. I'm a better
writer than I am an artist. Writing requires less motivation and courage. I just do it. I'm gonna
write as many 22-pg scripts as possible. My first one came out beyond great. Maybe even
perfect. Approved by George Lucas, Tim Burton, Jhonen Vasquez, Busta Rhymes, Method
Man, MC Chris, Bendis, Dave Willis, LeSean Thomas, Katsuhiro Otomo, Aaron
McGruder, John Lasseter, Todd McFarlane, Dave Filoni, Eminem, Marilyn Manson, Seth
MacFarlane, and Quentin Tarantino. Every famous screenwriter in Hollywood is buzzing
about me and my little scripts. All my favorite writers seem to really enjoy and admire my
writing. That's an honor.
I still like cartooning, but I'm finally able to acknowledge my imperfection(s) as an artist.
New Year's Resolution:
Use my Mental and Psychic Powers of Hyper-Focus, or Transcendental Meditation Sessions, to
focus on the task of writing scripts exclusively. Focus on screen writing, the writing of scripts
and nothing else. If I get good enough at my easiest task, I can multi task in a few months or
years.
Benefits of pursuing screenwriting, the "one area", with Transcendental Meditation Techniques:

I Master It
I become an expert
My power level and skill increases
Productivity skyrockets
Prolificacy
Employment
Feedback
Stack of Scripts
Tons of Outlines
Tones of Synopses
My Pile of Stories Becomes an Army of Fiction and Science-Fantasy / Military
------

Wednesday, February 20th, 2013,

Banged out a good old fashioned 7 pages of script for various short scenes, or "beats", in the last
15 hours or so. Not bad. I'm getting better. And considering 1 script is 22 pgs. in length, my
endurance seems to be improving.
How to Write For Animation by Jeffrey Scott is an instant classic! Much like Producing
Animation by Catherine Winder. The former book on writing animation has kind of become my

P a g e | 683

new go-to bible of writing and screenwriting. It's my new Understanding Comics. No small
accomplishment to carve out that prominent of a place on my book shelf. I was drawn to
animation writing because of the freedom and lack of competition.
I think a part of me just liked calling myself a cartoonist more than the act of
actually really being a cartoonist, getting the work done, and actually practicing and
working to be a real cartoonist. I liked the title and prestige better than the work
itself. That's why I used to love to TALK about my job and doing my job instead of
actually really doing my job. Now I'm actually starting to do the work.

It's not just about archetypes and mythos. It's also about mannerisms, small talk, gray areas, and
idle dialogue. There's George Lucas on one end of the writing and literary content spectrum, and
then there's Kevin Smith, way over on the other. Most movies and anime, the less famous ones,
fall somewhere in between the two (ends of the spectrum). The critically panned stuff.
Traditionally people have been polarized to like one or the other.
----Saturday, February 23rd, 2013,
Finally I've got some PDF file creation software. Glad I finally bought a copy.
Sunday, February 24th, 2013,
Family is over. My two cousins, Steve and Beth are visiting. it's actually pretty cool having them
here. I get to show Steve all my cool stuff.
As I've recently discovered, I'm an Socionics INTp / ILI. Here are some characteristics of that
temperament:

Well developed imaginative abilities

Mental wanderings
Living in their mind, spending excessive time there
Physical-Mental, Mind-Body Inertia
Reflecting on Scenarios
Pondering bodies of information
Pondering assorted concepts of interest
Excessive daydreaming
Involved in the creation of intricate inner worlds and universes (mythopoeia)
Replaying elements of their own experience
Natural Novelists. Novelistic Tendencies
Novelistic: They create intricate plots, characters, and places. Though unmotivated to
display such creativity publicly.

P a g e | 684

ILIs are not always inclined to share their imaginative tendencies and thoughts with
others
Complex mental landscapes that are shaped and continually revised by new information,
through the toy of mental knowledge

Monday, February 25th, 2013,

I'm currently in the process of editing, publishing, and printing 2 privately printed publications,
one a pocket book of essays, and the other the latest installment in the End Times saga, more
refined and fiercer than ever before: End Times Volume 1.2. The sequel comic to Issues 1 and 2.
The Debut issues of Numbers 1 and 2, were comprised of pages that were too glossy. 1.2 may
have incorrect size proportions, which it does, but at least the interior pages will have the right
texture
I wonder if my End Times, Parallax notes, the Journals, and my Inventors Notebooks will end up
in the Library of Congress. A man can dream, can't he.
So, I'm pretty sure I made a new friend online, FallFromGrace is the pseudonym, so I'm going
with that here. Seems nice enough. She's an INFP like I am kind of. And she's a very great
writer. I haven't seen any of her artwork, but apparently she's a young girl and LOVES my work.
She's been very nice to me about asking to see my writing and art, so I'm figuring, not a big deal.
No harm in letting her see some of my artwork and literature. I think it's all right if all I'm doing
is letting her see some of my creative work. After all I've never met nor do I know this person,
nor will probably ever know her, so if she wants to see the art and writings I've made over the
years, at least SOMEONE wants to see my work. God knows my PARENTS don't want to.
Tuesday, February 26th, 2013,
That's really great and amazing. I got a @Tweet response from a famous Franco-EnglishJapanese TV writer-designer-showrunner-visionary today. I mentioned Oban Star-Racers in a
tweet a few days ago, and I actually got a response from one of the main co-creators and head
co-producers of the entire show! Which is a huge honor for me because I am an enormous fan of
Oban Star-Racers, which is one of the best franime-anime of all time. I guess I just never thought
I'd get the chance to talk to a famous French TV auteur visionary. And yet here I am! His name?
Thomas Romain. Apparently he puts a lot of his cool stuff online. Something to aspire to.
Thomas Romain and Savin Yeatman-Eiffell are two of my favorite producers of all time, purely
through Oban Star-Racers, which is one of the most well-executed, dramatic, well written TV
shows
From what I know about it.
Thomas Romain = Production-Character Design
Yeatman-Eiffell = Design, Story, Writing

P a g e | 685

I've seen in the last 6 to 7 years. I should email Thomas Romain if he has a public email, and see
if he could critique my script...Nevermind, now that I looked, he doesn't have a public line.

My 6 Favorite TV Writers, in no status-based order, would have to be:

1.
2.
3.
4.
5.
6.

Chris Carter
Savin Yeatman-Eiffell
Yoshiyuki Tomino
Dave Filoni
Aaron McGruder
Jhonen Vasquez

People I'd love to have see my original scripts:

Jhonen
Japanese screenwriters of anime
Hong-Kong filmmakers
Quentin Tarantino
Dave Filoni
George Lucas
Myself
Tim Burton
Hollywood and L.A. Types
French filmmakers and auteur screenwriters for Franime and French cartoons-cinema
Novelists, Authors
Sean Akins
Adult Swim
Dave Willis
Williams Street Staff Writers

I'm looking forward to writing my next script. Uncertain of which logline will end up in
development "hell" first.
Thomas Romain is the first designer working in a prolific anime studio overseas (Satellite
Studio, over in Tokyo, Japan) who ever really reached out to me directly in any tangible way (in
this instance, it's through tweets and email. I hope this relationship eventually takes off. I may
have made a new industry friend other than Jhonen and Steve Blum today.

P a g e | 686

Work to be done:

Correspondence with Thomas Romain

Collect Royalty Check from Chitika
Finish Self-Publishing through Comixpress
Get Some Script Authoring Done
Draw with a Pencil
Draw Moar Comics
------

There. That wasn't so bad. I finished registering the first script I ever wrote with the WGA, the
Writers Guild of America: East. I should have done this all along. Registering your script is a
great deterrent of intellectual property theft in Hollywood and L.A. If someone uses a scene from
a script you've written, "parodic" or otherwise, you can and will often receive residuals for such
underhanded forms of intellectual property misappropriation if you're a WGA member. It's all
very clearly defined under copyright law. Someone attempts to use your original and creative
ideas without crediting you, chances are if you report it to the WGA, they will pursue whatever
party is in violation of literary and media copyright law.
Nowadays, it isn't considered all that perverted, at all really, to picture two pretty teen girls
taking off their clothes and underwear, getting naked, and having sex with each other. Girl
Chauvinist Pigs. Gotta love the teen lezzie rug munchers. Lord knows I've look at enough porn
like that that hacker-moles and cyberspies and cyberstalkres already know about. Better to keep
that fantasy to yourself than share it, though. Erotic Lesbianism (i.e. girl on girl) is one of the
biggest elements of obscure pop culture. Sure beats prostitution. Many Girls like it, and Many
Guys like it. That's pretty much it.
THAT...is what the masses want. Kinky teen stuff.
----I REALLY like the idea of "residuals".
In books and comics they call it royalties. In TV and film, they call it residuals.
To further elaborate: You're gettin' LAID n' PAID, DAVE!
----Savin Yeatman-Eiffell's specialty: Character Design, Script

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Thomas Romain: Director, Image Boards, Storyboard, Character Design, Layout

Sources of my Anime Influence:

Spawn (Todd McFarlane, Eric Radomski, Frank Miller, Dave Sim, Greg Capullo)
Invader Zim (Jhonen Vasquez, Corey)
Batman (Tim Burton, Bruce Timm, Frank Miller, Michael Reaves)
Tank Girl / Gorillaz (Jamie Hewlett)
AKIRA (Katsuhiro Otomo, Osamu Tezuka)
Oban Star-Racers (Thomas Romain, Savin Yeatman-Eiffell
The Boondocks (Aaron McGruder, LeSean Thomas)

Elements of Screenwriting

Writing
Designing
Storytelling
Framing
Budgeting
Revising / Editing
Budgeting
Selling
Pitching
Production
Polish
Marketing and Promotion

Art is seeing and listening.

Writing is Speaking and Discussing

After seeing Thomas Romains Google+ profile photo album of his artwork on assorted anime
with Satellite, and his art directing, storyboarding, character designs, and image boards over at
Sav! The World Studios, I realize he's my new hero. The first thing I noticed about his portfolio
was the amount of imagination, design, funkiness, detail, and general laborious hard work and
blood sweat and tears that go into every single one of his designs. He drew, illustrated, and
designed nearly 1/3rd of Oban himself, or even more than that. And he did it in 3 very different
mediums. Something to aspire to.

P a g e | 688

My education in animation must be much different than Thomas Romain's upbringing. I grew up
being fed lines like "You shouldn't think of animation as such a...laborious process." and lines
that implied intense focus and dozens of hours upon dozens of hours of nonstop work over
months and years would not be necessary to achieve a lofty status in the animation industry. All
you have to have is good material, the rest takes care of itself, it'll go. Boy was that teacher
wrong. I think he was giving theories and answers about success in animation that he hadn't
actually put into action and tested himself. A bad combination in any field of advance practice
and work.
In other words, regardless of how high up on the food chain you are as an animator, or a director,
don't go around giving advice and expertise on "how to sell a TV show to a network or studio or
producer" UNLESS you are one of the lucky minority few who has actually SOLD a show
before. Having a project in production hell only counts for HALF the work, BECAUSE you've
only done half the work and have half the experience. Don't be a know it all. Avoid being an
online know it all, unless you actually have some experience, IN THAT FIELD. Not all types of
animation styles and mediums are the same, and therefore the people that create ideas for those
mediums are not all the same, just like not all businesses or studios are the same. Don't assume
there's any actual type of uniformity going on in the animation community, industry, and
profession.
Many of my best designs are very Thomas-Romain-Like. I learn a ton about design just by
studying his studio-full collection of art.
Thursday, February 28th, 2012,
I need to hang out with my normal friends less, and start hanging out with fellow writers,
authors, designers, execs, actors, screenwriters, and producers in L.A. and worldwide more. I
really need to find more guys and gals like Thomas Romain to hang out with more.
I should really find some artists friends to hang out with. I wonder how many good artists live in
Central Florida.
Friday, March 1st, 2013,
I'm growing more and more convinced my father's dementia is getting progressively worse. At
first I didn't notice, but lately he's been behaving like a demented, angry, arrogant, and resentful
psychopath, and it's all aimed at me and no one else, other than maybe Andrew. My father is in
the early stages of Dementia, or Alzheimer's Disease, which means...he'll die. Eventually. I don't
know whether to pity him or kick his ass. It's impossible to talk to him normally, to communicate
with him like a real son to a real father. He builds a castle, or moat around himself, and whoa be
for anyone who tries to cross that moat.
-----

P a g e | 689

Having orgasms is like smoking crack. It's a high I'm quite addicted to.

Dear Journal, Saturday, March 2nd, 2013,

Music to my ears.
I'm starting to make peace with the fact that I'm the only one of my kind, that I'm the only one
that does exactly what I do, exactly how I do it. Others have TRIED to copy, plagiarize and
imitate, but thus far every single one of them has been branded an unsucksessful failure. For that
very reason. Because they attempted to ape my style or basic look and copy me...AND FAILED.
"We're TWICE the ninjas YOU fags are!"
-Eric Cartman
Unfortunately, one of (two of, actually) the most private, personal books I've ever written might
now be in the possession of a total psychopath. I can really only HOPE she doesn't realize what
she has in her possession. Some of my enemies would KILL to have those books, purely as a
means to destroy me as a pure enemy. But I didn't get that vibe that she actually sensed my
power, or knew how powerful that information she stumbled on was. Fortunately, I think she still
just assumes I'm a no-name author who "writes too much irrelevant information". I can live with
a situation like that, but in terms of security breaches, this is pretty big. Bigger sociopathenemies would try to use that book to destroy not only me, but everything I stand for.
Manipulating information about me to their own sick, twisted, and demented ends. She did admit
to being a sadist after all, so there's clearly a danger in giving ANY information to her. Not that
she seems to be aware of it.
I used to be so TERRIFIED (just TERRIFIED) of negative evaluation and judgment. Now
accepting negative judgment is more of a matter of survival than preparation. I had to overcome
my fear by trial by fire in order to survive that experience. Which I did unwillingly.
Totally Awesome, Totally UN-Supervised purchases:
Lock picking kit
Soon as I get some wheels, I am so gonna kill someone.
----Tuesday, March 4th, 2013,
Favorite Hong-Kong and Japanese live action Films?

P a g e | 690

Yes, that's right. I've watched enough Hong Kong Wuxia by now I now actually have a list.

Dance of the Drunken Mantis

Wu Dang
Last Hurrah for Chivalry
The Zatoichi: Blind Samurai Series
Hard Boiled
Hero
Crouching Tiger, Hidden Dragon
Versus

I'd really like to apply more strategy to what I do. But I'm still learning just what exactly strategy
is.
The most well-written Animated Series:

The Boondocks
Star Wars: The Clone Wars
Oban: Star-Racers
Invader ZIM
Aqua Teen Hunger Force
Batman: The Animated Series
Gundam Universe
Fullmetal Alchemist, Brotherhood
Spawn
The Maxx
Ghost in the Shell: Stand Alone Complex: 2nd Gig
Escaflowne
Cowboy Bebop
Ben 10
Monster
Wolf's Rain
-----

As soon as I finish printing the MASSIVE Thomas Romain art archives on my comp, I'm going
to be studying his drawings in a push to learn how to draw. Technically I already can draw, but I
want to focus enough to make my art even better. And who better to study off of and learn from
than Franco-Japanese franime and anime Co-Production Design Master, Thomas Romain.

P a g e | 691

I like some things about being online, and I love computers and software. But seriously, the
internet is for fools who don't value the importance of their own privacy...As the Fraud Watch
saying goes, there's a lot of bad, criminal people out there. "Think before you share"
I'm not quitting the internet for nothing. I'm quitting for very solid very sound reasons. I'm not
retiring from online because I'm embarrassed or ashamed of anything. Nor am I retiring because
I consider myself to have been "defeated" by anyone or anything. Nor am I "embarrassed" about
anything. I'm still happy as hell to do lots of free work, and work on creative projects all day. But
the compromise in user privacy has increased over the years. I'm getting out while the getting is
still good and safe. I value my privacy, and it's impossible to keep your privacy if you are a well
known netizen like myself. I'm just tired of all the B.S. associated with the way the public and
criminals perceive online information. The internet isn't private, nor is it safe or fair. And nor
does it value your or my privacy. The internet doesn't value anyone's privacy. I'm logging off in
pursuit of returning to the quiet, normal life I once lived. If I'm a big famous viral video or
internet icon, normality becomes next to impossible Plus no one knows if it's actually possible to
truly succeed on the internet. We have yet to see if anything online has any staying power,
considering most of it's been around for 15 years tops, at the most. But yes, once again, sharing
is dangerous. It can ruin your life. Think before you share.
---Drawing good, detailed comic book pages requires 2 main qualities:

Lots of prep work and lots of thumbnails

Patience for meticulous attention to detail. Lots of time for each panel (at least 2 hours
per panel)

Attention to Meticulous Detail = Tolerance to the Pain of Patience

More Time Spent on One Drawing = More Meticulous Detail
------

I already know how to draw with a graphite pencil and ink pen. Now I just need to learn to draw
with Photo reference, a magnifying glass, light table, and ruler, and make every line count.
Saturday, March 9th, 2013,
I need to develop a greater power of discipline and concentration. That means drawing more
often and very little else. The only reason I'm not drawing NOW is that I just finished the trauma
of having relatives over for 62 hours of being walled up in my room, incredibly silent, just lying
there, dodging social interaction and not really achieving much of anything. But I DID achieve
lying in bed for 62 hours, doing very little much else. It felt like being in a jail cell.

P a g e | 692

So I get the whole so-called "mysterious personality" and "Factory of Secrets" thing. Not that I
believe I live up to either one of those perceptions. The public really doesn't know a lot about
me. Just what I feed them and give them in some form or another, but even to me that doesn't
seem like a whole lot to go off of.

I'm a natural speculative fiction novelist. Science-Fiction and Fantasy, or Science-Fantasy.

I have a natural Novelist ability and tendencies. Not only can I conceive fiction, I can pen it as
well. I write my scripts like novels, and my novels like scripts, of the 19th Century Russian
Variety. I think what would George Lucas, Isaac Asimov, Tom Clancy, Mario Puzo, JK
Rowling, H.P. Lovecraft, and Leo Tolstoy do?
I'm really, REALLY starting to excel as a multi-tasker polymath finally. After all my talk, ado,
and bravado, I seem to be finally delivering on the actual doing the work part.
It's early on, March of 2013, and I'm actually excelling as a screenwriter, cartoonist, and novelist
now. The bad part: I still got miles to go on this journey. The good news: I'm so far past the
starting line of this marathon, I can't see the starting line anymore.
So Master Psychic was like, give it up man. This multi-tasking isn't working out for you. You
need to pick your best foot and put it forward, which helped me focus on one thing, and his
advice worked!
But out of nowhere, down from the heavens descended the God of Eurasian Anime, and he said
"DON'T DO IT MAN!" I was there, where you are now once, and you CAN master more than
one thing at once. I do it on a weekly basis.
And I said, "Thanks Eurasian Anime God Man. God bless you and all you do for media
worldwide."
Maybe I can do all 3 to 5 things. I just need to use meditation, power channeling, and hyperfocus on 1 job at a time. Take time with each area.
The general American churchgoing Public must Never Know I'm secretly the distant relative of
William the Conqueror. God only knows how confused that might make people who have
perceived me one way all this time. It would shatter their smug little reality. Even I don't have
the courage to shatter modern society's perception of reality. When people think William the
Conqueror. They think Princess Di, Prince William maybe, and The current Queen of England.
NOT me. And I hope it stays that way. There is a big time skip in my ancestry from Ancient
Begin Times to Current End Times. This information was in legally restrictive access, and away
from my hands, and out of my grasp until now for a reason. It has the potential to alter America
and the whole world's view of reality. To think a love affair in a psych ward could lead to one of

P a g e | 693

the Greatest Creative and Intellectual Lives in the History of Mankind. British Historic
Biographers would have a field day with this lost historical information if this were all true, and I
can't verify whether or not it is. The way people treat me in person seems to contradict what my
actual biological heritage would indicate in every way. Like the fact that I won't bald when I turn
40 or 50, and the fact that I'm going to have a real beard that gets realer with the older I get.
Eventually my face will be so busy 1/3rd of it will be covered in facial hair, just like my birth
father, Glendis.
Not EVERYONE goes through an Epic Conquest to Establish His Power. But then again, not
everyone is ME!

P a g e | 694

P a g e | 695

Chapter 15

P a g e | 696

Sunday, March 10th, 2013,

Favorite all time Comics and Animation companies?

Titmouse Inc.
Williams Street
Image Comics
SLG Publishing
Dark Horse Comics
Dark Horse Manga
Funimation
Oni Press
JM Animation
Sav! The World
Production I.G.
Walt Disney Animation
Tokyopop (R.I.P.)
Bandai (R.I.P.)

Most of the most established of these companies formed at least 10 or more years ago, since at
least the year 2000 or earlier. Everything else other than a few exceptions is just new as hell. All
the really new stuff in animation and comics is a bit different. Most of the studios and publishers
I mentioned here were around at least half a decade to a decade BEFORE the anime and manga
craze. They've got a certain stability and staying power, meanwhile the market itself cranks out
new shit, and generally acts FUCKING CRAZY and INSANE. At the very least, these
companies have all proven they genuinely know how to stay around, even when the economy's
been shit for 12 years.
I had a great email conversation with Jamie S. Rich earlier this evening, sometime around 8 or 9
p.m. And he offered me some sage comic book advice. The man has quite the comic book
resume in indie comics, one of my favorite fields. I find something relatable about him. He's a
prolific writer too. Doesn't tend to draw as much, but he's edited the professional work of a LOT
of artists. Like every artist working at Oni Press right during the 2000-2003 era and beyond. I
own a lot of the books he's edited in the past.

P a g e | 697

Jamie, Oni Press' former veteran Editor-in-Chief, had the following to say about working hard at
drawing and writing comics...
"There is no real secret to having a dedicated routine, except having a dedicated routine.
For many of us, the reward is largely in [doing] the work itself, it's not a ridiculously
lucrative profession, so passion and determination are essential. Most people I know that
stick to it don't want to do anything else. And doing art or writing is like working out, just
like getting better and stronger the more you [practice &] do it. You can run further each
time, lift more, etc."
To me, legs/kicking is writing, and arms/hands/fists/punch is art. I'm great at kicking, but my
punches can be weak and sloppy. A True Master Among Masters, Masters both.
If comics is exercise, Dave Sim, Otomo, Thomas Romain, Osamu Tezuka, and Todd McFarlane
are bodybuilders. Just a lot more out of shape most of the time. Mr. Universes of the comic book
world, work out and practice for many hours a day, every day.
Monday, March 11th, 2013,
I have enough inspiration to provide me with drawing/writing reference for a lifetime. That's not
the issue. The issue is I'm constantly seeking an outside opinion, outside support, my peers.
Anything but my inner motivation and confidence to actually motivate me to get to work,
working, starting to work, and continuing to work. The motivation and confidence must come
from within. I just wish I had more passion, determination, and motivation to keep working.
To start my new work, normally I need to review my actual pre-existing old work. To know
where I'm going, I need to discover where I've been.
Technically, I make a lot more money when I DON'T share my opinions and ideas.
Silence is Golden, I guess.
J-M atrix: Status Report:
Twitter (down)
Blogger (down)
DA (active)
ASMB (active)
Google Search (active)
Adsense (active)
SplitBoom (active)

P a g e | 698

By the time it's 10 years in the future, I'll have earned $26,000 (if estimates of future income are
correct, which they are).
----So I walked up to the prison front door.
"Yes?" The front gate guard said.
"Yes, is this the jail where they provide you free room and board, with TV and a laptop and
books, by yourself in a prison cell? I'd like to rent a cell."
"Son, I don't think you understand this place, what it's about, OR the justice system. You have to
commit a crime to end up in a jail cell. You can't just volunteer."
"Does watching "Girls Gone Wild" count?"
"No."
"Dammit!!!"
-----God I hate living in this house. Sometimes I think I rather would be in jail. Never been, but it's
probably better than the neighbors I have. They TALK and ACT LIKE INMATES.
----Thursday, March 14th, 2013,
I'm becoming more and more interested in the licensing potential of Mono. I'm submitting the
designs for Mono to one licensing studio. They claim to welcome new ideas, so I gave it a shot.

Listening to rock and classical music while drawing gives it power.

If you're drawing comics, you have to draw your comics like your filming a movie. Know
where the camera lingers and where the cuts go.
According to Otomo, the drive, passion, inspiration, struggle, effort, process, and energy
put into something (a project, drawing, scene, chapter, volume, tome, comic, or book)
matters just as much as the final illusion and finished product.
Everyone is naked on the page
What you put out there is either the best or worst of what you're readers will see
Comics is about learning to confront yourself and face up to your shadows and self, your
id and unconscious. Everything you don't want to admit is laid bare.

P a g e | 699

When I film a movie scene in my head, as a filmmaker, the scenes needs to be in motion.
The images need to move. And I need to contemplate how much time (panels, mini-cuts)
I spend lingering on each cut)
Manga Grammar or structural system is nonsense. All that flies out the window when I
really dive in and do the work.

Friday, March 15th, 2013,

In comics and manga, it's all about camera shots and transitions. Nowadays I try my best to
approach pages, panels, and compositions in panels like a filmmaker.
Comics doesn't really use editing, unless one counts the arrangement of panels on the page, and
their artistic development as "editing". Instead, there's cuts, or "transitions". Cuts sounds a lot
less grammatical than "transitions", so I'm going to go with cuts.
In comics, there's two main type of transition: Cuts and continued shots over multiple panels.
In manga there are a lot more cuts between shots than there are gradual transitions. That's how
most of cinema is.
According to Otomo, it's important not to draw for rewards, like fame and praise. He's never
been motivated by reward-based incentive, according to one interview a long time ago.
That's a good idea. It does seem a bit easier to draw when I'm not motivated to attain rewards of
ego or pleasure, like praise or fan devotion.
------Saturday, March 16th, 2013,
I know I'm the descendant of royalty. A blueblood (probably), because of my father's lineage.
But what about MY hopes. What about MY dreams. What about MY ambitions. I know being a
blueblood (even an unknowing one) means you are born into power in certain ways. But before I
found out about any of this, I grew up on, and always did have, dreams of being a "Creative
King". A King of Entertainment, Fantasy, Imagination, and Storytelling. But all my heroes
growing up....turns out none of them were bluebloods. I'm the only royal that aspired to being
anything other than a royal and actually wanted to be taken seriously for it. My status seems to
finally be conflicting with my dreams and ambitions. I don't HAVE TOO accomplish anything
with art or letters. But I so dearly want to. It's a burning desire to be an auteur or animation or
comics or film or literature or TV. Growing up, people who made it in those fields WERE
royalty to me. That was BEFORE the Arab Spring. It's not easy being an unknown relative of
royalty and famous people.

P a g e | 700

Allies:

Nicole
Phil
Otomo
Chris
Jonny
Jhonen
Steve Blum
Thomas (Romain, Alberts)
Maryanne
Glendis
Danielle
Amanda
Jamie
Ramin
Todd
George Lucas
Spielberg
Quentin (Tarantino, Alberts)
Titmouse
Ben Kalina
Chris Prynoski
LeSean
Aaron McGruder
Dave Willis
-----

P a g e | 701

New Art Subject Matter to Draw, Design, Flesh Out, and Sketch. On Paper

Advertising Commercials
American PR Brandwashing Propaganda
All Cartoon Networks
Krin
Crows
Biker Gangs
Red Scare
Soviet Art
Muslim Architecture
Dance of Shiva
Lady Liberty
FireBlade
Arab Spring
Egypt
Mubarak
Twitter
YouTube
DeviantART
My "Viral Perv" Video Website
Barack Obama
The News
New-Wave Horror Movies (The Ring, Saw, Weird Shadow Figures in Dark Rooms)
Squid (regular and giant)
Ship at Sea
Helicopter
Country Expressways, Grassy Valleys with Highway Roads and Fields/ Trees
Trees
Forrests
Winnebagos
Floods
Giant Holes
Mitt Romney
France
Weapons
Genga: Original Pictures by KATSUHIRO OTOMO
Fire
Water

P a g e | 702

Brushfires
Car Chases
Dialogue Scenes
Sanford
Traffic
Driving
Crime Shows
Neighborhood Hooligans, Swords, Drugs, Toddler Bullies, and Martial Arts
------

The whole "celebrity thing" kind of tends to eat away at my writing/art work schedule....
-----Comics Page: Criteria For a Successful Page

Is it Original Artwork (Not Copied from Other Artists)

Is it Structured and Compositionally Sound (Good Mise En Scene)
Is it Polished, Clean, and Detailed (Is it Dirty With Hatching & Pattern Lines)
Did you spend a lot of time on it, lingering on it and building it's textural details with
lines.
It has prep work (thumbnails, rough pencils, followed by clean polish pencils)
It is Pencilled, then Inked
------

Who am I fooling? Animation and TV careers in Los Angeles are built on luck. And I don't have
any of that. I'm not a lucky man. I'm a very unlucky man. My name got cursed by Bryan, and
ever since then it isn't a very lucky name. A common Biblical name. But not a lucky one.
-----Monday, March 18th, 2013,
I have no idea how powerful I am. I want to become more self-aware of my power and power
level or levels. Energy Levels, Chi Levels, Chakra Levels, Intensity Levels. They're all
connected. I need to see if there's some book or online article about "Using your power and
presence responsibly". I want to better understand my power so I can use it more responsibly.
Lots of people who have power, don't have the conscience to support it, and invariably end up as
tyrannical and terrifying psychopaths and sociopaths. I have a fear of ending up like those
people. Great Power really does require great responsibility to survive.

P a g e | 703

I drew my most detailed comic book page yet today. I spent a surprisingly LONG amount of
time on the 2 panels in my page. It's a Gundam Wing fancomic. That's the longest I've ever spent
drawing a multi-panel comics page: At least 50 minutes or more, with mp3 player connected to
my headphones.
Because my comics ARE getting that good, just really good (well, my douin anyway), I'm going
to overcompensate with my areas of skill. Really nailing my area of expertise.
Therefore, The Parallax "Series Bible" is on hiatus. I'm NOT moving to Los Angeles or going to
CalArts anytime soon. It's a shame, but not that much of a shame, as at least I'm becoming
proficient at drawing comics.
So I've begun to sacrifice animation work to pursue comic book work, due to it feeling easier for
me, currently at this moment, and it's paying off more now than ever in the history of my life. I
have more comic book power now since yesterday than I've ever had in my Entire Life. My
drawing powers seem to have intensified. It started with page one, the Gundam Douin, which
took an hour to draw. Then today I drew the 2 panel page I completely made up and built from
scratch. That took around 3 and a Half Hours to draw from start to finish, from pencilling to
revisions to inks

1 Hour (30 minutes per panel)

P a g e | 704

3 1/2 Hours, nonstop with a short break

I'm finally starting to overcome my shadow, bad habits, and laziness. And it reflects quite well
on my work. I've always taken comics seriously, but when I first start drawing comics I was just
happy to be drawing comics (when I drew Zounds), then I became either subconsciously afraid
or too lazy to do comics, so I did 150 mostly bad pages, with 7% actually being good, mostly to
flush out my system. Now I'm putting REAL effort into it, focusing, tuning out distractions,
facing up to myself, accepting my power, and spending incredibly long amounts of time building
up 1 page at a time indvidually. Now I'm actually starting to feel like a real draftsman. My
draftsmanship has resumed being better than usual again. I don't know if it looks professional.
But I'm really damn happy with it!
My lifelong goal is complete. I've mastered drawing comics, manga, and cartoons. And I'm
going to continue mastering drawing comics until I get better and better. I actually used some
math to construct my artwork today. Measured the paper with a ruler, for proportions. Then
reduced the size of the drawing when I redrew it, and divided the correlative contour length to
2/3rds the size of what it had been initially. That's the power of Donna. Donna my new(er)
teacher taught me how to use math, rulers, division, anatomical proportions, multiplications,

P a g e | 705

taping, light tables, tracing, cleanup, and measuring proportions in my drawing process. I used
every last one of those techniques for today's piece.
This kind of quality, power, and intensity in my drawing style is new. It's a natural high.
Drawing good pages is actually starting to feel addicting, like a natural high of natural power.
Drawing well and for long periods of time is a drug to me now. And a new one at that. I'm a
detail and dynamic art junkie. Doing one page of good art feels so great, I want to draw 1,0006,000 more! Just like Dave Sim and Otomo! I want to follow their example in some way, even if
it's a loosely based and vastly inferior interpretation.
Carl: Take duh article about the guy who's 20 times moh successful den him, SHOVE IT IN HIS
FACE.
I submitted my art to Jamie S. Rich, an editor for review. Sent off the art a few minutes ago. I
hope he responds. Fingers crossed.
New Story Arc:
End Times: The Shapeshifter Chronicles
Hero: Lo-Brow
Antagonist: Shapeshifter

Shapeshifter: The Profile:

What he looks like: A Faceless Entity in a cloak
Species: Defective Clone
I.Q. Level: Evil Mastermind 140 I.Q
Profession: Domestic Terrorist and Professional Doppelganger, Soul Stealer
Mental Problems: Sadist, Narcissist, Sociopathic Homicidal Maniac, Pedophile, Rapist
Sources of his Evil Power: TV Broadcasts, The News, The Media, Other People's Jealousy
------

P a g e | 706

Friday, March 22nd, 2013,

Yes! I got to talk to Thomas Romain! He's a pretty important, incredibly busy and famous guy,
just like Steve Blum, so I realize direct 1-on-1 talks with him will be rare, seeing as he views it
as more fair to the anime-franime fan community if we keep the interviews public, and not
behind people's backs. Good choice. He did give me some drawing advice though. He mentioned
my artwork he saw on my Google profile. He said the very same thing I was thinking at the time.
I need to spend more time on each piece of art. Put a lot of time and care into it, make the faces
more appealing. But he did also mention that the fact that I draw a lot is a good thing. Thank
goodness for his Google+ account.
Apparently, Thomas Romain, in terms of French and Japanese animation has a similar standing
in France and Japan to how Jhonen Vasquez is view in America. He has a rather large cult
following on the internet, ever since Code Lyoko and Oban Star-Racers, and various anime that
his work on Oban earned him. He's an amazing person.
Thomas Romain reminds me of Jhonen in some ways. I don't know if I know either one well
enough to say they're a "mentor". But I learn a whole lot from them.
Thomas is a master of Design, Storytelling, Franime, French Animation, Production Design, CoProductions, and Japanese Anime. Because he's worked successfully and powerfully in all those
fields.
Jhonen is a master of Design and Storytelling as well. But his specialty is Comics, Indie Comics,
and Progressive Primetime Sci-Fi and Fantasy American Animation of the ZIM variety.
Individually their more than influential enough. But getting the opportunity to learn from both of
them feels to me like a real privilege. They essentially get to do the things I've always secretly
hoped to do one thing. It's part of why I admire their work so much. Steve Blum is also a good
mentor, of being successful in general, but he's a master of acting, voice, and performance. Aside
from potentially casting him in a role one day, our fields are pretty different. My number one
goal is to attain art, writing, animation and comics connections one day.
Best advice recently:

Top Shelf Editor: Sequential Art or Comics Art is not the same thing as Regular Art
Jamie S. Rich, Author and Former Oni Editor: You Need More Work to Show
Thomas Romain, Designer and Director: Definitely Spend More Time On Your Art

My art muscles have been bulking up. I'm currently in the process of developing more work, I'm
spending up to 3 hours or more on each page, and I'm training myself not to give a week effort
on comic book panels.

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My effort is actually manifesting and shaping up to be pretty strong on the page. My small panels
are the best they've ever been so far. These are some of my soon to be numerous pos-Thomas
Romain density pages.
The closer I get to working in comics and animation or "anime and manga", the more I discover
how much less I actually know about how the medium works than initially anticipated.

P a g e | 708

Getting on the Good Side of Thomas Romain is like making a good impression on Franime and
the entire co-production medium itself. Maybe my animation career might just work out after all.
Comics is very demanding. But so is animation. In any genre. In any culture and country. And in
any medium. From what I've learned, the more popular, influential, and succesful you become,
the more it eats away at your time, the more people want of your time, and the less free time you
have to respond to inquiries.
So I met a few gods of comics and animation through the internet.
Keep Plugging Away.
So 1,001 girls want to sleep with me.
Keep Plugging Away.
So the public in general won't let me rest or leave my privacy alone.
Keep Plugging Away.
I don't know how to deal with all of this.
I started off a Joey. Then I graduated to Joe Status. The public really lagged behind on that one.
Next comes Joseph. My old guy adult name. That or J.M. Maybe both.
Going pro feels more to me like an alibi than an actual calling. Something to tell people who
aren't yet aware of how lost I've been feeling in the past decade.
Comics doesn't pay anything after all, and neither does animation. Even if I was paid to be a
cartoonist or animator, those paychecks would be miniscule, and the schedule grueling and the
media harsh.
Honestly, I mostly just want to become a better artist. One with the patience to wait and linger
for one of my more detailed pieces, big OR small, to be complete.
I've rediscovered the act of just sketching in a comic book panel, filling it in with pencil and ink
mileage until the white disappears.
Saturday, March 23rd, 2013,
By now I know my father's secret. My adoptive father's secret. Cary in reality knows how
successful and famous I am, but he resents me for it. Deeply. "Why does everything have to be
about him." My own current father is incredibly jealous of me. He hates the fact that I'm more
acclaimed and successful than him. Anything that makes me happy or successful he resents. Not
health. Not medical data. And certainly not psychoanalytical data. His worst fear is me finding

P a g e | 709

out he's bitter about my superiority and success. No wonder he hates cartoons and anime. They
reaffirm My Success. His Fear
Great. I just found out both Andrew AND Cary resent and envy my success. They're my rivals
now, unfortunately.
Cary has a LOT of envy-hatred within him. And a lot of yelling, screaming, and anger. Mostly
directed at me on a daily basis. He's resented me ever since I BECAME famous and powerful, or
at least a lot more so of those things than him. He resents the idea of being one of my
"subordinates", so he's made a silent secret private pledge to be the opposite of that, and a rival
and hater instead. Sometimes he's nice, not often though. He's out of touch with his real
emotions. He's not a fan of my success. He's harboring a lot of silent envy-hatred and resentment.
Envied by my current father. Abandoned by my birth mother and father. Harassed, bullied,
sabotaged and mocked by my current brother. Criticized by my current mother. Misunderstood
by the media and public. Impersonated and mocked by rivals. Overdiagnosed by doctors, social
workers, and therapists. Hated by enemies. Loved by followers and fans. Lusted after by young
ladies. Admired by teachers. J.M.'s got a lot to say. And a lot to think about. I'm deeply loved,
and deeply hated by many. I guess that makes me significant.
Advantages:

Money
Payments
Talent
Confidence
Time
Hard Work
Fortitude
Popularity
Charisma
Love
Relationships
Endorsement
Support
Advertising
Media Attention
Happiness
-----

P a g e | 710

I wish I had some Asian Artist friends. Far as I can tell I'm pretty sure I don't have any. All my
friends are white and don't draw, except one white friend who does draw. Asian friendship is
given, not taken, if my books I sometimes read about Asian Culture are true. I've always wanted
Asian friends but never actually had any, even online. There isn't much about me in real life that
Asia finds desirable or appealing. Especially my art. Particularly in Japan. Foreigner art does not
seem very beloved or popular in Japan. I wish it was, but it doesn't seem like it, with the
exception of famous foreigners like Thomas Romain and Sean Akins.
I guess there's always the business world and art.
Society thinks in terms of "or" and "versus". Society has thought in terms of Good & Evil or
Good & Bad for thousands of years. The majority of society in all facets of life thinks in terms of
"Us vs. Them". "You Are With Us Or Against Us". Shit like that. There's plenty of gray, but not
in religion and mythology. and not in politics and law. Society is set up to punish the losers, or
"bad guys", and needlessly reward the "winners" or "good guys". Ad nauseam. Good guys get
rewarded and bad guys get "punished" even if some good guys are really bad guys and some bad
guys are really good guys. Society gets deceived indoctrinated into ignoring this element.
Things I notice about good co-pros: Good Design, Fluid Animation, Vibrant Color Palette,
international, lower budgets, outsourcing of production work, drama, polish.
I like being a part of Thomas Romains online entourage. It's pretty cool. Makes me feel included
in something. There are 2 other proteges on his Google website. It's a small community, but a
good community. We interact, build the community and discuss animation of the Japanese,
American, and French variety, at length. All while Thomas manages the community.
Most of my literary work (from my graphic to my blog and journals) sucks. I wear myself out
trying to be overly chatty in written form. I've used up so much energy I'm too exhausted to write
a novel or script or another graphic novel. And just sitting around the house makes me want to
just kill myself it's so uncomfortable and boring. I'm not a big fan of R&R, unless it's somewhere
far, far away.
It can definitely be hard to meet Asian friends. But when you do meet Asian friends if they like
you they tend to be incredibly loyal.

P a g e | 711

Monday, March 25th, 2013,

I'm VERY happy with my life and where I'm at now. Also, I'm quite certain I don't envy anyone.
I'm not the envious type. I admire myself. I don't envy others. I see no reason why I should. I
know some people are envious of me, but I'm pretty sure in my case it doesn't work both ways.
Why would I envy any other man anyway? That's not one of my personality traits. I have enough
things it would be pretty dumb if I envied other guys.
For instance, I have no reason to even bother envying someone who plagiarizes me or steals my
look and gets popular that way like Stephen Colbert or whoever. I view that as more sad and
pathetic than anything. Why would I envy someone who doesn't even have the courage to
assume their own real identity and be themselves (instead of someone they're not, like me)?
Money doesn't make you a good person. Plenty of rich people do plenty of bad horrible things.
A part of me is glad I discovered modern Franco-Belgian comics tomes, and no one else did.
They're MINE, ALL MINE!!! AH HAH. AH HAH. AH HAHAHAHAHAAHHAHAH!!!!!!
MINE ALL MINE!!!!!
I have my little Amazon list of a whole bunch of French Tomes on my Wish List, which were
hand selected by me.
I don't remember anyone or anything reading or saying a Sorrell's metal must be proven by
getting assaulted with the face of shame and humiliation by people close to him, and the
American technological and traditional media. And yet, it is so. Well, now it is anyway.
Even though I'm on an anime hiatus, I'm still working on my manga-comics. I got my latest
published issue in the mail today from Comixpress.com, and I'm excited to get back to work:
Key phrases this time around:
Taking Time for Detail

Storyboard
Rhythm
Pacing
Cutting
Rhythm Boards
Action
Weapon Holding
Dialogue Sequence

My pacing is very influenced by Samura Hiroaki and Otomo Katsuhiro. The way they draw
action and transition between dialogue and violence in a scene is very cinematic, like a
filmmaker. I like that. I figure it can't hurt to map out the rhythm and pacing of my panels and

P a g e | 712

pages. There is pacing in terms of individual panels, and pacing in terms of individual pages that
contain multiple panels.
Cutting from one cut to another creates an internal rhythm among comic book pages, almost like
a dance in the way fight choreography mentions dance. In Chinese martial arts fight
choreography, fighting is equated with dancing.
Building from Here to There. Not There to Here. Here is what I already have. Then is a 600 pg
graphic novel polished.
What I'm doing now is the best I'll ever do. It always has been, it is, and it always will be.

Camera Cuts
Establishing Shots
Scenes (Action, Dialogue, Introduction, Conclusion)
Beats and Scene Transitions (Story, Action)
3-Hour Artwork
Backgrounds
Camera Angles
Thumbnails
Maps
Choreography Daydreaming Rhythm Boards

Drawing every day is important. An important thing to work for if you want to succeed as an
artist.
End Times is kind of a timeless, immortal thing. So far I haven't visualized a stopping point,
which is probably a good thing, for me at least, seeing as I seem to have just gotten the hang of
pacing and choreographed action rhythm. I've discovered a formula that tells me how to do a
comic book series that can potentially go on forever, or at least as long as my Journal has, which
is to say, 11 years or more. I'm up for it. And as long as I'm up for it, it doesn't matter to me
whether anyone else is. Finished comic or not, the world automatically keeps orbiting. I've gone
this long without truly succeeding on any noticeable level. What's 1 more decade. Not that I'm
complaining. But as of now, I'm just getting warmed up. I've been gathering my strength. My
training phase is almost over. I've just about got all my shit together, scarily enough. Give or take
1 or 2 more years. Maybe once I'm making money at it, I'll be a little more content, but as long
as I'm not making dollar 1, I'll keep working on those comics. It's a valiant effort, in my opinion.
Telling the story of Good & Evil. Continuing to tell the story of Good & Evil. I still view myself
as a perfectionist. It's amazing how willing to show my bad individual works I am when in
reality I'm a Master Perfectionist. Well, if someone wants to doubt or ignore me, far be it for me
to stop them. People can try to sell me, categorize, dissect, villainize, satirize, label, insult, mock,
box me in to this little space or whatever, but ultimately I know where I stand.

P a g e | 713

I'm pretty sure the genres that appeal the most to older readers are drama, action, suspense,
martial arts, and science-fantasy, or science-fiction and fantasy. Stuff like Star Wars, Lord of the
Rings, and Saving Private Ryan. I'm going for a male audience, between the ages of 25-54, both
sensitive and non. Of all cultural backgrounds and races. But definitely male readers.
Once I have a better grasp on what I'm doing, I'm probably going to do a new online tutorial. A
follow-up to my popular panel building tutorial. But it will be a comic book rhythm and pacing
tutorial, probably also hosted at Weebly, especially now that I've recovered my account.
Adult Swim's demographic is much lower than mine. They're trying to court teenage viewers
obviously. No one over the age of 21. Adult Swim isn't Adult at all. If Adult Swim actually
wanted an actual REAL adult audience, they'd emulate CBS primetime, VH1, History Channel,
AMC, and Ovation (which is tailor made for old people, or so it's been said) NOT Nickelodeon,
Cartoon Network, and MTV,
I desire harmony and peace. I do want there to be peace and harmony. But my presence is not a
bringer of harmony and peace. Quite the opposite. I destroy every place my family takes me to,
and pulls me out of that isn't Michigan or Illinois. Just because I want there to be harmony and
tranquility, doesn't mean that's what my presence will result in. Andrew, Cary, and Peggy are
even worse off in that area than I've been.
Things to buy:

We Drive You (dot com) ($40 / hour)

Smartphone portable O.S. ($70-$90)

Things to use:

Bank of America (dot com)

Debit Card
Adsense
Twitter Money (eventually, hopefully. It's turning into another YouTube)

IPO:

Google
LinkedIn
Twitter
YouTube

Because my Home Territory is so hostile toward me most of the time (with people always trying
to test my mettle, strength, and power, attempting to aggressively draw it out of me), it makes for
great Defensive Training. Because someone is always ready to Attack Me when I don't expect it,
my Defenses are essentially up all the time. If you are surrounded by Enemies, which I am, you

P a g e | 714

must learn to always have a strong Defensive Hand. Well, that or you need to get the hell out of
their on your own somehow, which I do plan on doing once I save up some money. There's
nothing wrong with leaving a place behind that enjoys making you uncomfortable.
Internet: Land of Parasitic Saboteur Sociopaths
Thursday, March 28th, 2012,
I submitted a tech idea to DirecTV, and it's actually going to get reviewed by the higher ups.
Powerful people in the company that run DirecTV will be viewing my tech invention. Maybe
even applying it. Anthony Wood himself might even be seeing my handiwork, which would be a
HUGE honor. Considering he's one of my personal heroes, in the same league as such people as
Bill Gates, Ted Turner, Lawrence Lessig, and Tim Berners-Lee. Anthony Wood founded Roku
and invented Netflix Instant Streaming, and DVR. No one's giving them a round of applause
either.
I'm home alone again. Not really much to do, but write.
Physical activities I do?
Transcendental Meditation. Drums. Haircuts. Martial Arts. Tai Chi. Judo. Tae Kwan Do.
Exercise. Driving. Travel. Kendo Fencing. Dual Wielding. Eating.
Jonny is the same old Jonny. He's evolved, but he still has that good old fashioned positive
attitude of his I always admired. Not even a steamroller could stop him. And it's already tried to,
time and again. He never gives up. Just gets right back up and keeps moving forward. Jonny's
got quite a bit of strength too, just like all my greatest personal friends in my private life do. We
may have our assorted vulnerabilities people aren't as aware of, but we're all strong in our own
ways. This bonds us as friends. Or, it does for me anyway. We're all heroic warriors that have all
faced setbacks, but we have not allowed those setbacks to define us. We just didn't realize it in
the beginning.
Friday, March 29th, 2013,
Honestly, I still browse DeviantART sometimes. What can I say. I get bored. I just wish there
was more better sequential art on there. More comics and manga pages. With numerous panels.
None of this pinup crap. Comics, sequential art, are hard to draw. There's a very noticeable
difference. But I admire artists who make an honest effort at comic books, and especially ones
that succeed.

P a g e | 715

P a g e | 716

Chapter 16

P a g e | 717

Saturday, March 30th, 2013,

Music Buff:

Sony Walkman (Digital MP3)

Windows Media Player
Albums, CD, Record Collection
Google Play
Rhapsody
Pandora
AllMusic
YouTube
Rolling Stone
Jonny Bartlett

Needless to say, I love my music. I love performing, music, music theory, rhythm, melody,
musical instruments, radio, discovering new music, rediscovering old music.
I was considering visiting Berlin. It's the place where Hitler blew his brains out, which was a big
part of what ended World War II, so that's definitely a tourist destination plus. I think I might
have to save that one for later. I'd be more than happy to travel there someday.
I traveled in Central Florida for around 200 miles, total a few days ago. That was fun. For only
staying in Central Florida, that was traveling pretty far.
If I could just do loglines, professionally, for a living for the rest of my days. Be an idea man in
the purest sense of the world, wouldn't that be great. That's kind of all I know how to do: Not
flesh things out, and not write actual narratives and stories, but write story premises. Loglines.
DISCLAIMER! The views and opinions expressed in these paragraphs are my own, no one
else's. Nothing is set in stone, so don't think that. This as of now is just me pontificating. Thanks.
END TIMES could be a TV pilot, a TV episode. Code speak for that. BUT, the reality is, it is
(or at least, COULD BE) the first 22 minutes (theoretically) of a 120 minute Action Film, that
happens to be animated. I realize just recently, TV hardly ever takes itself seriously as a
filmmaking medium. I'm better off emulating AKIRA, a comic-to-film, or Star Wars: a novel-tofilm. The story should probably be finite and limited, minus sequels, which could be an option. I
felt constricted by television, like with shows like Ed, Edd, n' Eddy, and Family Guy, writers
simply refuse to take themselves dramatically or seriously. Or their work for that matter. Really
sucks. It pays to start off with doing all the extra work and learning to love the work, and
worrying about how to categorize it afterwards. You have to be careful about what you tell the
press early on. I'm not thinking business until I have at LEAST 4 to 5 scripts of End Times
written. It all must start with something concrete: Specifically a script. If you don't have at least

P a g e | 718

10-20 pages of script done, you ain't got nothing. I have a little bit done, but not enough to call it
a career.
I'm still inspired by certain hyper-cinematic TV shows, like Escaflowne, Wolf's Rain, IGPX,
Oban Star-Racers, Spawn, and Ghost in the Shell SAC 2nd Gig. But those are the exception to
TV, not the rule.
Low-key lighting through, one of my favorite elements of cinema feels more welcome in the
cinema than it does in broadcasting.
I feel like people have attempted to bully, sully, victimize, and villainize my public brand image.
I need to clean that thing up. A cleaner overall image certainly wouldn't hurt. Am I pure of heart?
Pure enough of heart to be a leader in reality, or through my stories?
The tables will turn one day. Slowly but surely, they will turn. One day I'll become The Master.
The Celebrity. The Great Man. It may not happen overnight, but if I work for it, I can make it
happen. One day, I'll be a Thomas Romain. I'll be a Katsuhiro Otomo, and young brilliant less
experienced artists will look to me the same way I used to look to them, as I do now. The torch
will be passed...some day.
Speaking of moving on, I'm TIRED of making every project I work on black. It's starting to feel
depressing. I think even I don't want my brand trademark to be that depressing. From now on
everything is white or gray or blue or orange or white and red and blue. Or white and green. Or
white and yellow. Or yellow. Or orange. Or white, yellow, and orange. Something not so scary
and depressing. Black scares some people.
Also, Japanese and American animation are 2 very separate beasts. By Japanese standards my
work is not perfect like certain anime. Certain lines are flawed, and therefore my work to the
Japanese is "flawed in general". "Not Japanese enough". By American Standards, my design
work is some of the best work around. I'm still one of the best American manga-ka in the world.
It really depends on who you ask about the quality of my work.
-----I just got done with the Family Sunday Easter Party. I enjoyed that party, a lot. I think I may
have found my first real writing and business mentor, depending on how willing he is to talk to
me, his nephew about these sorts of things. Uncle Richard, or "Uncle Dick" as I knew him
growing up, worked in marketing and journalism all his life. He's quite wealthy, and he loves my
writing. He knew just by looking at the syntax of my word and letter and sentence / paragraph
rhythm on the page that "He's got something special there". He wrote marketing copy for all
kinds of billion dollar brands, from Apple to IBM, and many others. I'm really hoping he'll
mentor me in writing and entrepreneurship. We do get along really well, and he's known me

P a g e | 719

since before I was born. He's a successful man. And he's actually quite wealthy. He and his wife,
my Aunt Cathy, can actually afford to do as they please, financially speaking.
I asked Richard, "Do you attribute your success more to luck, or hard work."
Richard said, "Actually, I'd say both, but you may as well work hard to begin with because that's
something you can actually control."
Monday, April 1st, 2013
I'm modeling my future home tech system and computer and wiring network and basing my
secret private use technology on things like The White House Internet Engineers, and the Walt
Disney Imagineers. I'll hire a team of hardware and software developers to build original and
made up technology at my house. I won't even patent it. But it is my tech ideas that interface
with the technology of my home technology laboratory. As long as I have the money, funding
isn't an issue. The real issue is the How and Why of the Tech Building Operation. JM's Computer
Laboratory, build by a team of first rate engineers and builders from the ground up. I'm sure I'll
attempt to build every idea that comes to me....eventually. In house production is a big deal to
me. That includes in house computers, wiring, networks, operating systems, streaming systems,
DVDs, video playback, hardware, and software. It will all be done behind closed doors, as to not
tempt the plagiarists swipers.
Tuesday, April 2nd, 2013,
My writing and art are symbiotic. They go together in everything I do. It's kind of a package
deal. I'm an author of pictures and words. Be it a comic book or illustrated literary word story.
I'm trying out Go To My PC. I'm actually writing this word document journal file on Dad's PC,
but from a remote location in separate room accessing the separate computer files from my
laptop. And soon, very soon(!) I'll have a portable operating system on my soon to be owned
smart phone, and will be even more portable networked and remote! I'm good with networks!
And systems! I'm already mastering the interfacing of these 2 systems I already own! Awesome.
I know better than to put most of my best ideas down on a computer, where they can get hacked
into and publicized by parasitic moles, hungry for corporate espionage. If it's valuable, it doesn't
end up on the computer. Not with me anyway. Too many cyber-security bleaches, er, I mean
breaches.
One of my oldest teachers said some words to me during lessons once, that left an impression on
my psyche. He almost seemed to be saying it in what almost sounded like a sarcastic, taunting
way. Another way of saying "You've still got a long while to go. This was when I was 18 or so.

P a g e | 720

He said "Ya know, if you had something to present, something to show, like a bible of some sort,
I'd say "MAN! Fox....UPN'll LOVE THIS! But so far you've got nuthin to show..." he said
confidently.
"So have something to show?" I said.
"That's right. Have something to show."
But when I got back home from my teachers studio later that night, as I turned in for the night,
little did I realize how much those innocent sounding words would haunt me for YEARS to
frantically produce work after work of both writing and art (even if it was sprawling and lacking
in direction) until I had a lot to show (1,000s of pages in fact) as the end of the first decade of
2000 would show...But once I attained that goal of compensating for a weakness BIG TIME and
doing my little Epic Fantasy Action Thing. Then came the next dilemma: All that work, but
working so hard, alone in solitude at a desk over the course of a decade made me lonely, jaded,
and alone. I had lost all my allies. There was no hope or mercy for me at that point. My own
wandering tendency confined to this house ended up being a prison of its own making, filled
with paranoia, and hatred towards just about everybody. I let Phil's words get to me so much, and
compensated for my weak areas so much, I ended up going to the other extreme, from having all
sorts of social contacts with nothing real to show for my efforts, to having no real social or
business contacts with an esoteric OCEAN of theoretically and abstract art and writing that could
technically be show to anyone with an open mind.
And then my second discovery: My work and travels were indeed epic, but my work's content
and form and focus lacked grammar, structure, completion and direction. It was like building a
skyscraper, but running out of funding halfway through. My work was indeed plentiful and
prolific, but there was no focus to it. It was just wandering to wherever my imagination would
take me on the page. Sometimes it made sense, and sometimes it didn't. Now I'm "compensating"
for that flaw too. I've finishe my first script initially, and a New-Earth manuscript and numerous
comic book 1-shows and maybe, JUST MAYBE, webcomics are in the works too. I guess you
never know.
I can draw a stationary Mono Jubei sword or action standing overcoat pose in my sleep now. It's
really become quite easy for me.
I now know, it's important not to fret about the future, or get lazy and/or impatient with my
drawing process. There is no need to scan my work as soon as it is finished. Just like you don't
need to do press interviews as soon as you finish writing a manuscript.
[this paragraph censored for content]

P a g e | 721

Wednesday, April 3rd, 2013,

Best ways to promote my work online? Probably, Twitter, and my YouTube Subscribers
Contacts List. I just forward URLs to all my loyal and supportive followers who don't mind
being contacted by me. Seems to be working pretty efficiently. Even my End Times webcomics
site has more views than usual.
ArtResize software is great. It's a great auto-formatting option for End Times. Formatting your
pages to your WCN account is half the challenge. Uploading my webcomics to WCN is now
twice as easy, because ArtResize software makes it automatic. Does this sound like a commercial
to anyone? Good. You earned that one, ArtResize Software.
Tweeting, Blogging, Amazon, Adsense, and YouTubing takes up a lot of my time. Too much,
actually. I need to cut down on that. But at what cost to me?
I have a bit more autonomy than I used to. And as an INTP, I'm always happy to proclaim that.
The media sense us a lot of dangerous and nihilistic (not to mention powerful) subliminal
imagery and messages that attempt to destroy, violate, and sabotage our autonomy as humans
and thinking, Rational Entities. But it's not so hard to avoid once you know what to look to
avoid.
Thursday, April 4th, 2013,
Franco-Japanese Auteurs

Tezuka
Miyazaki
Moebius
Akira Toriyama
Eiichiro Oda
Masashi Kishimoto
Tite Kubo
OTOMO
Enki Bilal
Savin Yeatman-Eiffell
Thomas Romain
Eddie Mehong

----Currently, my total "net worth" stands at about $163.64. It was at $0 before. That $163.64 is a
self-made amount of money. Earn of my own raw will power, ingenuity, and hard work for the

P a g e | 722

most part. That's the kind of profit I want to make. The kind I earn. Not the kind that's handed
out to me. I'd rather get nothing than handouts.
THIS, is POWER. I...am POWER. What I REPRESENT, is POWER. Not how I look. That's the
opposite of my internal power. My body symbolizes weakness and vulnerability, meanwhile my
mind and spirit represent strength and power. If someone's attempting to encroach or muscle in
on my presence in some way, whether by namedropping it or attempting to "hijack the likeness"
like some irritating cyberterrorist, that's a power grab, and will be recognized as such. I don't fall
for that anymore. A power grab is still a powergrab.

I like,

Good Company
Meeting Expectations
Support of my work
Succeeding
Getting the recognition that I crave for my creative work
Having a product to hold in my hands
Money, payments, property, wealth, finances, royalties
Good bosses
Getting support from friends and colleagues
Loyal friends that stay friends, and that don't shape-shift into enemies
Being a magnet to the opposite sex
-----

How to get hired.

Learn to Drive
Work Well With Customers
Write a Resume
Finish a Manuscript / Cover Letter
Learn Photoshop
Learn a Second, Third, and Fourth Language
Apply Everywhere, Submit Everywhere
Have the Skills to Finish the Work

P a g e | 723

My writing is very influenced by bands such as Pink Floyd, Queen, Primus, and Radiohead. Just
having a strong concept or two, and traversing The Cosmos with it.
Friday, April 5th, 2013,
I think I may be doing something relatively new: Combining cartooning and the martial arts. I
like being a martial arts cartoonist. I study, practice, and train to attain Ultimate Zen in both the
martial arts and cartooning arts. It's important to attain a chi motion. Chi, or fluid motion, both in
your arms, hands, legs, and feet, but also in your pen and pencil. And in the paper. Zen and
Martial Arts as well as meditation helps me focus on my drawing for longer amounts of time,
and I attain a better eye for detail.
Being a Kung-Fu Cartoonist, includes studying martial arts, reading about martial arts, practicing
martial arts, studying live action film fight choreography as though you were a choreographer,
meditation, drawing comics, drawing fighting and fight scenes, and watching anime and reading
manga from Japan, China, and South Korea. It's an entire lifestyle, away of life, a form of living.
I seek the martial arts for discipline, will-power, dedication, energy, and strength that can be
applied to my artwork and comic book pages.
The test of drawing comics and graphic novels is just as much of a lifestyle test as it is any sort
of creative, artistic, or literary test. Fortunately, I feel I'm up to the challenge nowadays...I've
done 23 new comic book pages and illustrations in the span of around 3 months, some of which I
put on my WCN account, even though Webcomics Nation is a Big Fat Failure. I'll still put effort
into it, because I like making comics, not because I want rewards for my work like fame, positive
comments, money or anything like that.
Work Quota:

WCN One-Shots
Production Design Image Board (detail heavy)
Script (Druidon)
Shitty Graphic Novel (End Times Graphic Sketch Novel)
4-Medium Prototypes

Fiction Outline (Prose Page) (600 Page Science-Fantasy Novel)

Screenwriting (Script) (26x26)
Cartooning (Comics Page) (6,000-Page Comic-Manga Graphic Novel where I do
everything)
Art Director (Concept Art, Production Design, Character) Anime-Animation Series
(Science=Fantasy)

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Finally, the prototype examples for each of these mediums (TV, film, comics, novels) are
finished.
There are three component styles to every comic book:

Drafting and Drawing Style

Transition, Pacing, Rhythm, Page, and Storytelling Style
Mise En Scene, Layout, or Panel Interior Compositional Style

And for A Renaissance Soul, more tasks equals more work...In General. The more talents an
artist-writer possesses, the more work he's going to have to deal with in general. Each field takes
an involving amount of work. There's no shortcuts when one is being a polymath renaissance
man.
Favorite Phrases: King of All Media

I'm Never Bored

The Work itself is the Reward
Rest on my Laurels
Vast Media Empire
Masterpiece of Power

Katsuhiro Otomo (Feature Film, Anime, Manga, Comics) (No Novel)

Jhonen Vasquez (Comics, Animation) (No Novel, no film)
Thomas Romain (Animation, Anime) (no comics, no novel, no film)
Todd McFarlane (Comics, Animation, Manga, Anime, Feature Film) (No Novel)
Bruce Timm (Animation, Comics, Film) (No Novel)
Man of Action (Comics, Animation, Film) (No Novel)
Tim Burton (Film, Animation, TV) (No Novel, No Comics)
George Lucas (Animation, Film, TV, Comics, Novels, Manga, Anime) ding ding ding!
Dave Willis (TV, Animation, Film) (No novel, No comics or manga)

I'm running out of guys to admire.

Saturday, April 6th, 2013,
I've had the privilege and pleasure of getting to talk to famed designer Thomas Romain online,
about the nuts and bolts of Japanese and French animation production. He thinks I should
research and write a book about the production process behind it, especially Japanese anime,
which is his specialty. Well, I'll definitely consult Thomas Romain if I ever do write that book,
as he seems to be the most open to share on his experiences in the field.

P a g e | 725

My anime mentors:

Jamie S. Rich
Jhonen Vasquez
Shinji Kasai
Corey Senderov Jackson
AnimeTV
Bang Zoom! Entertainment
Lance Heiskell
Todd McFarlane
Raynart Tradnor
Steve Blum
Thomas Romain
-------

Monday, April 8th, 2013,

I've gotten some feedback from my little anime group about what I should do with my skills in
my little online pro anime group. Thomas Romain, who has a ton of connections in anime, is
impressed and happy with A) the fact that I draw a lot, B) I write a lot about French and Japanese
anime, and C) I'm very enthusiastic about my interests. He recommended writing a book about
the anime production industry because I'm so enthused about it. Viv Xiu, the other moderator,
thought it was really cool how much I like anime, and thought I should move to Japan. I just said
I'd kind of prefer to just focus on finding work in animation, maybe some day pursuing work in
Japan, and France as well maybe, even though Thomas isn't a fan of French anime that isn't like
his own, which makes sense considering he worked on Code Lyoko and Oban Star-Racers.
The Thomas-verse:

Savin Yeatman-Eiffel
Eddie Mehong
Shinichiro Watanabe
Dai Sato
Christophe Ferreira
Stanislas Brunet
Shoji Kawamori
Koji Morimoto
Koyama Shigeto
Shinichiro Watanabe
Dai Sato

P a g e | 726

Being in open communication with Thomas is the closest to the artistic side of the Japanese
anime community I've ever been. It's an honor and a privilege, even if it's "just Q &A talk". The
difference between Steve Blum and Thomas Romain is Steve is well known mostly in America.
Thomas Romain went the other way and has a lot of input on the creative industries in France
and Japan. I'd so love to be a apprentice to Thomas. I'd like to keep in touch with both men if I
can, if it's at all possible. Maybe one day I can call them really good friends I know really well.
---I had a dream that supposedly means I have a lot of power over others. I do like the idea of
having the ability to have influence over other people, so no loss there. But where is my
influence strongest? Media old and new, technology, animation, comics, and entertainment and
opinion. I have a lot of power over the anime industry, the comics industry, TV, social media,
and online broadcasting. It's good to be one of the men in control.
But End Times so-called animation and comic book "reign" is over. Sure it will still influence
the industry, but I've worked on it so much it no longer holds a monopoly on my daily and
nightly thought process. The temptation to diverge and continue exploring other places has
become too great. It has to do with flexibility. I want to be flexible. End Times was a nice little
portfolio for my design skills, but I really need to lighten up. Maybe not grip my own career so
tightly, and learn to relax a little bit and just let the parts and niches fall as they may, instead of
trying to force things to happen for me so much. Just have some faith in my own abilities, my
own self. My ability to come up with something new, even with all this, and just keep on keeping
on.
Tuesday, April 9th, 2013,
All my life, I automatically feel instinctively drawn to the guy, vision, woman, art, writing, book,
comic book, music album, song, TV show, movie, website, video, media company, or business
with the most power. I have a power radar. I have an easy time spotting and seeing power in
other people. And every so often, in myself as well.
The destination, or final end product, the comic book, novel, TV Show, Movie, DVD or
whatever, is not as important as growing older, resting on my laurels, taking my time, enjoying
the work, and enjoying the process. American manga, indie comics, and Japanese anime are not
lucrative professions at all. If you make as low as $100 or more, that's considered "lucky". Being
an inventor pays 1 million times more. Maybe I should just do that.

P a g e | 727

Wednesday, April 10th, 2013,

There's really only 2 types of things I do prolifically and habitually:
A) What I really like to do, & B) What I'm skilled at and have an easy time doing
Things like

Journal writing (3,000 pgs)

Accumulating computer files (I have over 6,000)
Running a YouTube Page (3,000 favorite videos)
Operating a Tweet Feed (9,000 tweets by me)

I find considerably less enjoyment in:

Screenwriting (22 pages)

Outline Writing
Production Design
Character Design
Concept Art
Comics

Things I want to get good at:

Drawing Duels
Cartooning
Animation and Film Choreography
painting in Gouache and Acrylics
Screenwriting
Writing Short Stories
Drawing By Computer (Concept-Production Design, Character Design)
----------

Thursday, April 11th, 2013,

It comes down to literature, story, and literary abilities. I've got more literary productivity and
ingenuity in my right pinky than Japan has in its entire Nation. Let's face it, the Japanese are
never going to beat America in terms of innovation, technology, money, software, patents,
computers, literacy, writing, or storytelling. They beat us in other areas, but none of those. Just
because you like anime and manga doesn't automatically make you hyper-literate. Historically
speaking, we never have seen writers like Isaac Asimov and Leo Tolstoy coming out of Japan.
Russia maybe. But not Japan.

P a g e | 728

Yes, I do believe America should get along with foreign nations. But I also believe America
should still compete economically and culturally with other nations. I used to shy away from
competing with people directly. Now, I thrive on it.
I don't get by on wicked malicious words alone like some writers online (and nowhere else) try
to do. I actually try to put some effort into my writing. Or at the very least, consistency and
fortitude with which I charge ahead.
-----Friday, April 12th, 2013th,
I have tons of ingenuity. That's how I figured out how to turn the contents of a small part of my
DVD and WMV file collection into an internet business experiment that actually turned a profit.
I'm one of the first people ever to profit off of my own collection of digitized, shared content.
Why am I making money where so many others don't? Because I'm an entrepreneur. Much like
certain other tech inventors, I figured out how.
That's weird how a reclusive lifestyle almost seems to be encouraged by middle America
nowadays. Whatever happened to socializing. Internet, Social Media, School, Work, and
Conventions are where everyone socializes. BUT IF YOU DON'T HAVE ANY OF THOSE
THINGS??? Socialization has gotten so categorized and organized, it's actually a bit scary.
Whatever happened to just hanging out and talking to nice people, like I used to actually do? I
kind of HATE this new "internet lifestyle" that's gone so mainstream with everybody.
Johnny Test, Aqua Teen Hunger Force, and Regular Show, Clone Wars, Kick Buttowski, among
quite a few others are kind of my own public-persona on screen stand-ins, made by people like a
like-minded sense of humor. I can't help but think they were intended as such to begin with,
looking back.
------Sunday, April 14th, 2013,
So I finally started a blog that actually reflects my passion for something. I took my passion for
French manga tome covers and artwork, and started a blog with it. The first of its kind. A cover
gallery of contemporary French manga tomes. Thomas was right. You have to find ways to use
you're passions to your advantage. Take your passion for your interests, and build something out
of it, like a book, an invention, or a website.

P a g e | 729

My Passions:

Animation Production
Anime Production
French Animation Production
Inventions
Inventing
Software
Writing
Blogging
French Manga
Art Books
Todd McFarlane Cover Art
Cerebus Cover Art
Sequential Art
France
Design
Design Analysis
Project Analysis
Big Business
Media
Online Broadcasting
DVD Science
Broadcasting Art and Science
Editing
Hong Kong Cinema
Hong Kong Choreography
Alternative Rock Music
Heavy Metal
Complexity
Theoretical Analysis
The Science and Art of Power
The Science and Power of Planning

P a g e | 730

List:
The Few American Graphic Novelist Storytellers Who I've Always Admired

Todd McFarlane (Spawn, Monthly)

Dave Sim (Cerebus, Monthly)
Jhonen Vasquez (JtHM, Monthly)
Frank Miller (Sin City, Monthly)

I forget the rest. Some have done it longer and bigger, and some have done it on a more epic
scale. But no one's had their book(s) cracked open by me as many times as those 4 have.
I've also decided, I'm going to do a whole lot of 1-shot comics issues, which will build up over a
few years to 1 200-pg. trade paperback, which = 10 issues a year. I've done 1 so far. Now I just
need to keep up with my own schedule. If I can manage drafting up a few pages a week or month
I'll be able to get my anthology of one-shots done on time. My book will literally be just me
piling a bunch of one-shots on top of one another and binding them together through Lulu and
ComixPress. To do something Vasquez or Miller worthy, it's important to set up a daily and
monthly schedule, regardless of how much I suck at this moment in time.
Spawn, Cerebus, Nny, and Sin City are all series built over daily work schedules and monthly
one shots and series releases. None of those books were done in one sitting, or for an extended
period. They were built up, incrementally, issue by issue, each decade. Their foundation is one
that's rock solid.
What gives the McFarlanes, Sims, Millers, and Vasquezes of the world such stamina is they all
worked in monthly comics and set up a routine before retiring from the field or going off to do
something else. And if I do finish a book as good as any of those, you can bet it won't sell as
good or be as well liked.
Issues 1 & 2 of the End Times series, pages 1 - 40, are in the can. Only 8 more one-shots to go.
Issue 2 of End Times 2.0, was completed this year, in 2013 at ComixPress.
In some ways, I am the King of This New Insanity.
In some other ways, I am but a mere Victim of It.
Much of this Media, Design, Filmmaking, and Storytelling Revolution is being Pioneered and
Driven by Me. I'm the Man Steering the Vehicle. I'm at the Wheel. But I don't have much direct
contact with the Road Itself.
End Times has elements of a military drama, and a federal agent espionage and counterespionage procedural. It's also a science fiction (SF), and urban chanbara fantasy.

P a g e | 731

Monday, April 15th, 2013,

I've deduced I'm a psychic creative. That might explain why my creative projects are both loved
and hated. I'm literally channeling creative and psychic energy from another realm of
consciousness-existence or a realm of creativity and imagination, and manifesting that energy on
the page. That's why I'm a Visionary. So are a lot of ingenious artists. It's nothing new. I'm also a
fan of the visuals that are the most psychic and visionary: Spawn, French Comics Covers,
Gundam and Ghost in the Shell, Manga, cyberpunk, indie comics, Akira, Jean Giraud
("Moebius"), Sav! The World, Thomas Romain. Fantasy, Science-Fiction, Expressionism.
They're probably also channeling, just as I am. It's a mystical process.
Part of the reason I have so much trouble changing and improving my initial designs is it's not
entirely mine. I'm just channeling it. I'm not creating it. It's coming from the Lord God, The
Force, All That Is, The Spirit Realm, the Spirit World, The Cosmos, wherever it's coming from.
It's coming from wherever it's being channeled from, not entirely from my mind or imagination. I
don't make all of what I draw. I'm a visionary and therefore a lot of it comes from thin air and is
just delivered to me, dropped onto my lap from outer space or whatever one wants to theorize
about it. That's why it's inconsistent and I do so many bad drawings along with good. I'm not
entirely in control of being able to shut my visions on and off. A lot of it depends on me showing
up to the drawing surface at the right time to channel, and not the wrong time. I can never predict
when the right time is, other than ranging between 11 a.m. and 5 in the evening, on weekdays
only almost all of the time. How my drawing turns out depends on Where? Why? How? What?
and When?

Where I'm choosing to draw.

Why I'm drawing.
How I'm approaching my drawing process.
What I'm drawing. What I'm drawing with.
When I'm drawing (what time of the day).

These all affect how my art is channeled.

ANALOGY: TV and Channeling
Channeling is like watching satellite cable TV. The spiritual vision
is the TV Signal that gets beamed to my mind, sight, perception,
emotions, and mind's eye, which are the satellite. And the TV shows we
see come through a screen the same way visions are made manifest on a
piece of paper or computer screen through pictures and words. Seeing
what I've drawn is like watching my favorite shows on TV. The nature
of Lord God and Broadcasters is actually one and the same, when one
thinks about it. The signal is beamed from the source to the
destination. Anyone can create their own storyboards for a TV show,

P a g e | 732
anime, or movie, right there on the page, as opposed to the obvious,
which is TV shows, websites, and movies.
Quality Control
I'm definitely not entirely in control of the quality of my artwork
and each of my art pieces. Only the Lord-God is in control of that. My
personal higher power, my Buddha-Cognizance, my lightning rod, my
muse, the powerful element of my consciousness controls that. I can
control how I move the pencil, pen, and paintbrush, but not what
comes out of it (lines, forms, images, rhythms).
Ultimately, I don't decide the final outcome. I don't decide, nor am I
in control of how good my art will actually be. But I am in control of
when, how, what, and where I apply pencil or pen to paper.

Neither bad weather, nor tornadoes, nor dynamite explosions, nor crazy stalker people, nor
fraudulent shrinks shall ever stop me from doing my job. One way or another, I will reach my
goal. A good mythos is like a good house. You can live there forever without a problem. Even
the worst, most destructive activities won't destroy its foundation. My creativity, is like my
house. It has one of the most stable of stable foundations.
Steve Blum is my most famous friend.
Thomas Romain is my most creative friend.
And Jerry Conser is my richest friend. Perhaps I should explain a thing or two about my peer and
ally Jerry.
Currently, he funded, managed, and runs the Psychical Research Foundation in Texas.
But before he did that on the side, he became a Texas Oil Drilling Tycoon, with a net worth in
excess of $100 million. He really likes my creative work, and encourages my psychic abilities,
which is something my parents never do. He also is the author of the book, Proof of God.
Tuesday, April 16th, 2013,
The computer and technology manufacturing industry, or PC software and hardware industry
(Steve Jobs, Steve Wozniak, Bill Gates, Paul Allen, Tim Berners-Lee, Larry Page, Mark
Zuckerberg), is the one billion dollar big industry business, where for the most part, you can
have hundreds of billions of dollars at your disposal, and unlike Hollywood (Spielberg, Lucas,
Lasseter), or broadcasting (Farnsworth, Anthony Wood, Chad Hurley, Turner), or automotive
manufacturing (Henry Ford), or aviation (the Wright Brothers), or Oil, (Texas, the Middle East),
Politics (Obama, Bush, Clinton), where you can be king, a titan of industry and the world, and
still not somehow be looked upon as an overbearing tyrant or tabloid fodder. It's "exempt from

P a g e | 733

scorn," strangely enough, unless your Bill Gates I guess. Part of it is the "positive spin and Wall
Street connection"
I want End Times to be cool. Something people will want once they see it. Like years ago when I
first drew those first few black and white cover and interior page images. If I can do more comic
book pages it will continue to keep being cool. New and freshly manufactured is cool. Old isn't.
New Pages of Comics, never seen by anyone before = Cool.
I did learn a few things about my family from watching pop-docs on TV.
My adoptive dad, Cary, likes to eat nasty food and nasty drinks. Stuff that's really bitter, really
foul tasting for most people. I swear to god you could dig slimy garbage out of the trash can and
it would taste better than half the stuff Dad puts on his plate. Disgusting food he eats. Stuff that
would easily send me to the can, or make me vomit if I ever tried it or smelled it for too long.
Not a fan of dad's food and hygiene choices. He likes the nasty taste of traditional non flavored
non flattened beer so much he even drinks seltzer water to compensate for the absence of the
taste of beer. He really, REALLY likes drinking beer, often at the expense of my confidence,
safety, reputation, health, and self-esteem.
My brother Andrew is so obsessed with violent movies, he even copies the fictional characters he
sees even to the point of pursuing the same career choices made up characters pursue, purely
because he saw some made up character in an 80s action-gore movie do it. His entire "career" is
built on aspiring to copy actors he sees in violent movies, and actually having the gullibility to
take that shit seriously. He REALLY needs to stop watching those movies. They give him
IDEAS. BAD, VERY BAD IDEAS. Kind of a perverse way of thinking. He literally thinks
drama and action and horror popcorn movies from L.A. and Hollywood have more truth than the
reality around him, and more glory than the Bible. Even to the point of joining the N.R.A just
because he can and wants an excuse to shoot someone so he can commit "justifiable" homicide.
The list goes on. I'm not the only one in my family who's flawed.
Mom is on the phone too much and too often, for too long, with people she doesn't even know all
that well, in laws and distant relatives or whatever. InCREDIBLY ANNOYING
Marketers and the Media like to zero in on things people CAN'T change or CONTROL (not
overnight anyway), quirks, bad habits, behavioral patterns, and actions certain people have very
little control over. With the media, it's about demasculation and castration, not empowerment, or
self-empowerment. It's Not what they/we CAN control, but it's always been that way. To this day
the media feeds on that, encouraging feelings of immobility, victimhood, lack of strength,
weakness, and vulnerable fear and helplessness in the mass. In common people. As long as
people continue to "rely on their propaganda and message and brainwashing, indoctrination,
gentrification, and brandwashing", what do they care if they're doing the opposite of helping

P a g e | 734

people. All they care about is the payday, and telling you how much more other people deserve
that than you, too.
Phonies, Phonies, Everywhere.
Living in a now-bad neighborhood in a lower middle class part of town is actually very
distracting from my best efforts. Makes it difficult or impossible to get to work. Too stressful. I
don't get to leave the house to go to work the way Cary does. I'm not that lucky. I got to live
around pricks all day, and listen to the peanut gallery, some idiots yelling and feeding me shit
every day from outside, even when I'm in the "comfort" of my own house. It's impossible to
work in conditions like these. That goes double for art.
One of my greatest superpowers is my very presence. My name. My face. My hair. My mind and
the thoughts it manifests. All the things that make my mind and my body. My soul and spirit. My
soul is apparently worth a lot of money, if the amount of people attempting to steal it is any
indicator. With all their cameras, have they succeeded in their attempts to rob me of my soul yet.
Photography is taboo in Southeast Asia for that very reason. They actually do equate the face
with the soul, and many people in Japan believe if your face is photographed, the camera steals
your soul. Does that mean American marketing models and actors, celebrity actors and
musicians have no souls, considering how much their faces are photographed? My Greatest
Superpower is my Presence. The Power of my Presence is my Greatest Presence of All. Where I
am is where the power is. Where I go is where the power is. So what happens when I'm forced
out onto the street because everyone refuses to pay me money to survive. What happens when all
that potential power is jeopardized because of how cheap everyone else is around me? Would my
power somehow help me survive on the street? Will my power ever provide me an actual
desirable place and location to live?

Tom Clancy writes spy novels about The Cold War Missile Crisis that broke out mostly
in the 80s. A potential Nuclear Apocalypse
Katsuhiro Otomo wrote a famous manga about the Japanese government experiments and
"cover up" of government experiments with psychic ability and psychokinesis run amok
on Tokyo after World War III.
Ghost in the Shell: Stand Alone Complex, 2nd GiG is an anime about refugees with
terrorist tendencies arms dealing and trying to acquire nuclear weapons
American Dad is about a "down to earth normal conservative" dad that puts a comedic
spin on government corruption and the CIA in America during the modern 2000 and
whatever era
End Times is about hunting demons and terrorists, and maybe an intermingling of the
two, in a Post-Apocalyptic Akira and Star Wars, like Dark Fantasy Urban Fantasy
landscape

P a g e | 735

Every last one of these series covers military might and political intrigue. I created one of them.
Can you guess which one?
Wednesday, April 17th, 2013,
The aughts were good. They were okay. But the twenty-tens are MINE!
Miss Choi, one of my favorite high school teachers, gave me a Korean-Chinese oracle divination
test when I was in school at one point that led to her saying about me "You're going to have a lot
of money" when I grow up. Supposedly I drew a an island in the ocean, and the water represent a
sea of money
I have a fair amount of confidence in my ability to produce quality comics pages in the future.
More than HALF the 30 page issue I've recently finished work, or about 15 new pages, were
drawn for the book in the last month or two. HALF.
I attribute my hyper-focus and deep concentration on my work during the day, to my work's
newfound productivity and success.
Thursday, April 18th, 2013,
I don't draw comics for a living. I draw comics because I take great pleasure in drawing
comics...in a general sense. Drawing comics for profit would be too tough. I wouldn't do well at
a convention. That's a little to in your face and social for me. And as long as I'm not with a big
name publisher, there never will be demand for public appearances...Thank God.
Friday, April 19th 2013,
I've started using Google+ for online socializing and sharing of my artwork and thoughts and
profile. It's the only social media outlet I use other than Twitter. I don't use FaceBook, and
MySpace died a horrible death.

P a g e | 736

P a g e | 737

Chapter 17

P a g e | 738

Saturday, April 20th, 2013,

Thomas Romain might just turn out to be a mentor to me. Greatest. Animation coach. Ever! He
lives his ideals every day. He's well connected in both France and Japan, and has tons of contacts
in both countries, and also knows a lot of people who have lived in the U.S. and worked on
animation here as well. And then there's the people Thomas is friends with: Satelight, Thomas's
boss, Shoji Kawamori, who co-created the co-pro Basquash! with him.
Thomas is the perfect example of a western anime designer and creator (Basquash!, Oban, and of
course Code: Lyoko) who isn't Japanese but a French ex-pat.
Also, knowing someone who's worked on French or Franime co-pros doesn't hurt either.
It appears I might be a protege of Thomas Romain, and get to study and train under him. Having
Thomas Romain as a mentor would be a dream come true! Real anime training!
This newly formed alliance with Thomas online must be part of that "Rewards beyond belief"
my horoscope told me about a long time ago, about "rewards in later life that will come to you if
you somehow manage to tough it out through all the difficulties. Well, there's:

Steve Blum stuff

My friendship with Animation Magazine and Ramin Zahed
My comic book series I've gotten some work done on
Thomas @ Satelight and his generosity of thoughts

Now that I think about it, this isn't luck. It's hard work, perseverance, and smart thinking. You
don't get accomplishments like these by dumb luck. You have to be on the lookout for things that
will benefit you. Not my accomplishments specifically, but there's all sorts of opportunities out
there waiting for people who would otherwise have no claim to fame, but got smart and were
able to recognize opportunity when they saw it. The higher up on the hierarchy you get will end
up resulting in more and more accomplishments with a smaller amount of effort. Just don't brag
to strangers or be a "know it all" as my friend Phil calls it.
So, apparently, at some point I have to choose, between the less evil of 2 fates.
A) Poverty and Never Achieving Commercial Success or Stability in this lifetime. Obscurity, No
Respect. And constant Disrespect
or
B) Constant Disrespect, Mocking, and Condescending Degradation Success Would Cause as the
Result of Fame, which on a smaller level was already there to begin with.

P a g e | 739

It looks like people will be criticizing me regardless of whether I succeed or fail. There's got to
be some other option than those 2 horrible outcomes of doom.
This sounds like something alcohol will fix. Frankly I'm too damned depressed NOT to be
drinking my depression away with alcohol. Much better than pills and talk. Alcohol is my only
real solace. I remember reading there was a lot of alcoholism in the writing and art communities.
Thank goodness for that.
The alcohol has given my life new meaning. I love getting buzzed.
That new meaning to (my) life is this...

I need to keep working on it though. It's detailed, but it could be more proportionate. But no. I've
never seen anything like it before. I just like drawing it, it's so beautiful. I don't know if I actually
want to make a story about it. I wish I could drive something like this down the street. That
would be awesome.
What is my ideal work environment:

P a g e | 740

One that's like the art lessons I took at Phil's house for animation, give or take. Like Disney and
Nickelodeon during the mid-90s, or an anime studio nowadays in Japan.
My ideal work environment is one that is quiet, low key, peaceful, harmonious, friendly,
humorous, open yet everyone is respect and given their own space. In other words, it doesn't
resemble almost any corporate animation studio. There's more hostility in the politics. It just sort
of feels and seems more loud and aggressive to me, or at least more progressive. More females
and young adults working probably, more college interns. At Will Street (maybe), South Park
Studios, Fox Animation Studios, Comedy Central Studios. Bang Zoom Entertainment. MTV
Animation. Judgmental Films. Seth MacFarlane's studios. Sony. Cartoon Network. I would NOT
fit in. Probably NOT. Not now that I'm well known. And probably not ever again. They all know
good and well who I am.
Working for the wrong studio, under the wrong terms, can destroy some of the less prepared.
The deadlines, the workload, the stress, the pressure, the envy and animosity from certain peers.
Just being me IN the industry every day is risking destruction.
Sunday, April 21st, 2013,
Having powerful connections won't solve all your problems. That's one thing I didn't realize
before I met powerful friends. One of the most powerful actors, and one of the most powerful
designers in the business of animation. I'm not going to ask them for money or a job or anything
like that, though I do hope to collaborate with them on a project, when I'm more ready.
How in the world did I get mixed up with these infantile, delusional, antisocial, psychotic
webcomic online types anyway. A large part of me wants nothing to do with almost any of them.
Joey Manley's fruitier than a fruitbowl. Nuttier than a squirrel.
I hate to admit this, but the truth needs to come out. Webcomics Nation, is an insane sham. They
prey on innocent comic book creators who don't know any better in hopes of exploiting them to
promote their website. That's simply got to be one of the worst possible ways to get your work
out there. The user interface is poorly designed, hard to use, and incredibly not well thought out
in general. I hope Google does SOMETHING with webcomics some day, or SLG, or Oni Press,
or Image, or Dark Horse. WCN is a fucking JOKE. And a cruel one at that. They tried to leach
off of my reputation forever. To this day the effects of WCN's swindling can still be felt in
comics like mine. They don't GIVE A SHIT about quality of what they publish, just so long as
they have a moderate amount of quantity.
I'm incredibly proud of my age. 30 years old. Makes me very, very happy to know the evils of
youth are behind me. I relish my adulthood. I'm happy to be old. It feels like they let me out of
some kind of psychological prison cell. I bided my time until I officially did become a full grown
adult, and now I am one. I may have flaws (then again I may not), but I'm still happy as hell bein'
old. I look forward to my 40s, 50s, and 60s. I should probably get back in shape though, and get

P a g e | 741

the pill prescription thing with my parents sorted out. That shit, the fat and the pills, has got to
go.
Monday, April 22, 2013,
It's too bad Louis Griffin and the voice actor who plays her is such an annoying, UGLY OLD
HAG who likes to fuck ducks.
My YouTube channel that I've had since 2008, is now sitting pretty at half a million views, or
500k / 500,000 views. I'm now officially successful. I've officially made it on the internet. My
channel is an internet hit. It averages over 100 views per day.
Thanks to my video ingenuity and my popularity with the mainstream media, I haven't been
making money for more than 12 months or the equivalent of a year yet, so the facts and figures
aren't entirely in yet, and won't be until half or two thirds way through 2013, but it's been
estimated according to 1 website, that I stand to earn, on average, an online salary of somewhere
between $150-$2,200 per year.
I've got the money. I've got the influence. I've got the establishment on my side. In other words, I
have a lot of the power. But with great power, comes great responsibility. The power has come
at a price, and with controversy. But business is business. If you can't handle that fact, get out of
the rat race and let other's compete.
The only career fields I'll ever make money at are the ones that AREN'T established or
competitive. The ones I invent and pioneer from the ground up. I make a lot of money in video
and filmmaking purely due to how innovative I am in both my business technique and thinking
style. Cartooning and animation doesn't offer that for me. It never has. Those two things have
never offered me success, but the opposite of success: Persistent failure. Technology is an
emerging field. One I will come to rely on more and more as the years go on, I'd assume.
Tuesday, April 23rd, 2013,
I seem to have developed some kind of Bill Gates / Anthony Wood-like power over new and
developing video technology. I can make the rules. I can define and defy the rules. Hell, with
these powers I can even bend and break the rules and still win because my powers are just that
omnipotent. I helped create the entire medium. There are a million potential outlets for me to
make a profit. If one fails, I can dream up five to 20 to 30 more, in a hydra style fashion. My
powers are a Hydra: Kill 1, 50 more pop up in its place. Copyright and big business is no match
for it. The competition doesn't know what it's getting itself into. I mean, look at how jealous
Viacom is of me and YouTube. PERFECT example.
But the thing is, I honestly don't want to hoard and traffic all the insider information. Just some
of it. I want to share some of my knowledge, preferably with people who aren't competing

P a g e | 742

against me. I'd like to try my hand at A) Being a Video Tech Guru, B) Writing independently
published books and tutorials about file management, uploading, ripping, and burning DVDs.
But to teach, I'd first need to transcribe and document my process and methods, which are
obviously very advanced and superior to everything else out there.
I've got insider information about secret technology prototypes, methods, devices, and
techniques. TV never shows any of that, mostly because it doesn't actually know how it works.
Only tech and video geniuses like me do.
Less than 2 weeks left till payday. So naturally I'm left gritting my teeth and am forced to strong
arm some truth out of people to get any actual feedback...from anyone. Y'know, just dodge all
the giant butcher knives the shadow figures keep trying to hurl at my back when I'm not looking.
Wow. Apparently I'm not such a loveable "loser" after all. Loveable yes. But "loser"? Sorry.
You know what? Sometimes you SHOULDN'T listen to what other people have to say. So filled
with VENOM it is. Fuck that. Fuck listening to input.
On YouTube, I'm one of the very, very few people that's getting paid for my videos. Truth is, if
you're on YouTube, and your video gets 200 billion hits or whatever, chances are, the contents of
your wallet don't reflect that. But mine do!
Essay: Meditations On Violence
So I've recently discovered military lore, and spy fiction, and the various tropes associated with
those fields. Stuff like Jack Ryan, James Bond 007, MI6, Ian Fleming, and Tom Clancy. Quite a
bit different type of art than raw fantasy and SF.
On firearms: I don't collect real firearms. My mental health history in a background check would
essentially make that impossible. But I am intrigued by the idea of replica firearms. In my
neighborhood, or "hood" those would be just as good for self defense if people are threatening
you. And my neighbors DO threaten and bully me, so they are essentially bringing this arsenal
on themselves. Of course, it's not like I'd tell them that, until it was too late, of course. That's
right. I'm goin' Columbine up in this bitch. Not really, but if people get that impression from me
I'm well past the point of caring. It's self-defense from living in a bully and hacker infested
neighborhood that's gone downhill with bullies and drug dealers and cops since the early aughts.
But I am prepared to start dealing with it and declaring martial law if people REALLY want to
push me.
I don't play around when it comes to violence. If I say I want to shoot you, chances are, I
REALLY DO WANT TO SHOOT YOU. Just like Elvis and his TV.
I'm not against Obama. I respect and admire Obama. And I'm VERY liberal. But I don't agree
with most of his gun policies AT ALL. I like guns. And I like movies and literature with guns in

P a g e | 743

them. Nothing more, nothing less. I don't endorse school violence, but it stems from bullying and
cyber-bullying, and always will, now and forever more. If you mock or make fun of someone in
public, you're practically GIVING THEM THE RIGHT TO GUN YOUR ASS DOWN. OR just
shoot you on the spot. Far as I'm concerned. It's Martial Law. And that's a LOT LESS CRAZY
than HALF the social bully bullshit that goes down in Central Florida. Gun violence isn't the
problem. It's the aggression and hatred of the average young Floridian that's the actual problem.
Too many road raging and street walking bullies in Florida, infesting the streets and traffic,
trying to intimidate the vulnerable and weak, preying on them like predators. Someone should
wipe them all out. Like Batman.
The truth: I grew up being bullied mercilessly by bullies in my neighborhood and local high
school to the point of losing my mind, and then Brian Johnston the big fat pig nerd bully came
along, threatened my life, endangered my safety, attempted to humiliate and persecute me, try to
get me to kill myself, even tried to kill me with malice, social pressure, hacking my dad's
computer, and cyberbullying, not to mention repeated accusations of pedophelia often attempting
to get me in trouble with the FBI on purpose. These resulted in more than 5 lengthy stays at
psychiatric hospitals. All while being judged for my demeanor and physical appearance and skin
color, by racists and bigots who thought I was a sissy or gay or whatever their little minds
thought. It didn't get better from there. I was forced to be hospitalized, go into counseling and
hiding, and genuinely fear and distrust everyone around me, and ESPECIALLY on TV and in
the mainstream and internet media, because it was the same story with online people. They
weren't much better to me, even in Japan online (DeviantART).
All this persecution drove me over the edge, so when I finally saw a James Bond movie earlier
tonight where he blew the bad guys and predators away with guns and explosives, taking an
active stance against your enemies, stalkers, hackers, and persecutors, and other predators, it left
quite an impression on me.
After that epiphany on violence and revenge, it made me realize, if Brian Johnston can bear
arms, as a bully, murderer, and villain, so can the good guy and the victim(s), and the nerds, and
the innocent, in righteousness and heroism. Crime and punishment. Justice and Order. Martial
Law. If the system doesn't want to bail you out, you have to do it to yourself sometimes,
especially when your safety and well being and life are at stake and in danger. And mine have
been endangered and persecuted by society. Multiple times. I've been put in danger by gleefully
sadistic sociopaths and bullies, many living right next to me, too many times to count.
And therefore I DO believe in the American right to bear arms, or thing that resemble them, in
self defense against aggressors, sociopaths, predators and sadists living right next door, across
the fence, and down the street from you. The Nightmare Next Door my parents deny the
existence of and say doesn't exist, that it's a hallucination and I need to be on medication for it.
That I'M The one who's at fault "Not them", that it's all my fault. That I deserve the punishment
that society has decided to dump on me and my physical appearance, like diarrhea straight from

P a g e | 744

God's Ass. I don't accept that at all. I believe in aggression as a response to aggression and
hatred. I believe in martial arts and rocks and bats and weapons as a response of self defense.
Action needs to be taken. You can BE Rambo if everyone's punishing you for no reason. Which
is what happened to me
Okay, I've calmed down now. My Tomino-like Burning Anger has subsided. But yes, I do
believe there is a Healing and Cathartic Power to Writing About Your Anger instead of literally
Lashing Out in Real Life, which is what happens if people are censored, suppressed, and
oppressed, and not allowed to express themselves. That is why communist societies are so
miserable. They're not truly allowed to express themselves. They don't have the Healing Power
of Self-Expression in Art, Music, Film, Literature, and Writing, much like what I've expressed
tonight with my Meditation on Violence. Which is a reference to a film or book or something or
other like that.
In comics, Horizontal Page + Horizontal Page, Digitized, = 1 Virtualized 2 Panel Vertical
Page.
The presence of animators and designers in America of my Mono Jubei Private Eye Samurai
Warrior Archetype can be seen and felt on every major cable animation network in existence.
Here's some that follow the mono archetype:

Ben 10 (Cartoon Network, Boomerang)

Star Wars: The Clone Wars (Cartoon Network, Adult Swim)
GI Joe Resolute (Adult Swim)
Danny Phantom (Nickelodeon)
Power Rangers Samurai (Nickelodeon, Nicktoons)
Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles (2012) (Nickelodeon, Nicktoons)
Generator Rex (Cartoon Network)
Magi Nation (4KidsTV)
Storm Hawks (Cartoon Network)

Parallax and End Times are like the modern day version of Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles. The
creators of Ninja Turtles also modeled their vision after Frank Miller's best works, and wanted to
make their vision very dark, scary, but ended up making networks compromises. Except this
time, instead of using the actual idea, they "borrowed" from its likeness.

Saturday, April 27th, 2013,

In total, I have somewhere in the neighborhood of 40 different story concepts, and ideas, in the
form of short fiction, outlines, notations, scripts, and loglines. Pretty soon I'll be picking one and
going with it.

P a g e | 745

Writing technique: "Write between the lines". Fill in the details between sentences, words,
phrases, and paragraphs, adding phrases, details, dialogue, action, and description between words
and sentences. Add literary density. Making paragraphs more crowded with description, action,
and dialogue between sentences and paragraphs that are already written is a form of filling in the
details.
I'm writing a new kind of novel. I know I'm a bit young to be a novelist. But this is necessary.
Someone needs to write this kind of novel. A certain kind of novel no one's read before. One that
focuses on imagination, violence, philosophy, and contemporary society. The last time I tried to
write a novel, it was Shadow Walker. You see, I'm a Master Builder, as some call it. And what I
want to build is a Novel. And yes, if you watch enough movies, you can write a decent novel.
"No One Will Laugh When It Strikes"
-The Aquabats
"Sequence Erase"
Novels can be about anything, from kaiju, to paramilitary lore, conspiracy, espionage, business
espionage, frauds, hackers, thieves, assholes, the internet, the mafia, aliens, robots, murder, the
paranormal, mystery, darkness, Satan, the Apocalypse, weird A-Z. I'm going to write novels like
H.P. Lovecraft, George Lucas, Katsuhiro Otomo, Nick Hornby, Dave Eggers, and Stephen King.
It's about time I started Delivering on my Promises.
To write with energy, and that extra "oomph", I find listening to mp3s is a pretty effective
technique for setting a tone and mood. I need mah tunes, dude! I'm tired of getting mocked trying
to do what I'm not good at. From this moment on, I am sticking to what I am. I will win by
concerted effort in my areas of mastery. No one can touch me when I'm truly in my Element.
And yes, I AM going to "Kill Brian".
The truth about being a novelist is, you kind of have to "fake it till you make it". If you write a
lot of fiction, even if you don't entirely know how to describe action or scenery, you're halfway
there nonetheless. You compensate for what you don't know how to write by writing anything in
the fashion of what you DO know how to write, like action and dialogue with minimal
description, until you can write description. The only way to get better at writing fiction and
novels is by writing fiction and novels. Fretting the act of writing won't make you a better writer.
Only writing what you're not good at writing (fiction) will make you a better writer. If all you do
is write and use the internet, then write stories about recluses who stays in their house (your
house) all day, and write or use the internet, until you do know how to write more than just that.
If you're never mobile and always in one place, write about the place you are in. Practice and
mastery come from word mileage, just as art detail and line quality comes from pencil mileage.
One bad habit I have as a writer is to undercredit myself and my own accomplishment. I keep
subconsciously denying and ignoring how much fiction and scripts I've already written, that isn't

P a g e | 746

just about me...and my house. They're just words, not sculpting in marble. They only become
marble over time, after they accumulate into a massive pile of brief manuscripts. Like my
Journals.

Just finished a DBZ Notan-Noir Genga Ink Study, where I shade a Genga Layout Cell from a
Japanese anime. And now that I realize how good I am at this, I really, really want to buy those
Neon Genesis Evangelion and Ghost in the Shell Genga Art Books. They're expensive, but I'm
sure they have a wealth of advanced Genga material to draw from for ink studies.
Also, when I get my first few comics done in self-publishing, I think Word Press, Google+, and
Twitter would be a wonderful outlet to promote my printed work to. When promoting your
comics you need to go where there isn't any intentional resistance.
To be honest, I love anime, and international (and local) animation production. I love the
technical aspects of animation. I have a genuine obsession with that sort of thing. I love it so
much I hope to make it part of my employment somewhere, somehow, some day. It's the How(?)
Part that I haven't figured out yet. But fortunately I'm not clueless. I'm just an outsider and don't
have a lot of relations with very many animation and comics people. Partially because I never
leave my house. But even if I did, where could I go, in Florida, near my neighborhood. It's not a
very animation friendly town. There was an animation studio in Disney World at one point, and
Full Sail is downtown, along with a few comic book shops. But other than that, nothing. There's
just me, and I'm no tourist attraction. Or at least I shouldn't be. I need to work on my comics and
art, not become a tourist trap.
My manga art got 44 +'s on Google+. That's WAY better than I ever did on DeviantART in the
same amount of time (3 to 4 days...so far). If there's one thing that makes me a happy man, it is
getting approval for my artwork. I must admit, all this approval and love from the fans feels
good. All this approval is restoring my faith in my drawing abilities. They LOVED my Goku!
Made me so happy! Makes me want to draw 10 more just like it. And I'm going to have enough
Genga in the next few months to do 30-50 more if I want to! What with the GiTS and
Evangelion Genga books.
Sunday, April 28th, 2013,
I really want to be one of the helpers in the IGPX folder over at Adult Swim. But I gotta see if I
have what it takes. I got the knowledge part down. I know the statistical data and info on IGPX,
I'm a fairly well known frequenter at the ASMB. But I'm often not up that late, just like everyone
else. But I can always try to make an exception. But still, helping with IGPX on any sort of
"official" level is an opportunity too good to pass up. That could easily become my new hobby.
I'll continue to post and pitch myself. But I need time. Currently I'm studying all the industry

P a g e | 747

film and anime databases IGPX is listed on, to brush up on my IGPX data, so I can prepare
myself for this job.
....Just finished taking a phone TV survey. Man. This is getting serious! I've never gotten called
for a TV survey before. Cool!

Monday, April 29th, 2013,

I've finally done it. I've beat the medication. It's finally not knocking me out for a change.
Despite being on a strong dosage of sleeping pills, I'm not sleeping. It worked! My focus
overcame the pills finally!
There sure are a lot of details involved in being famous.
J.M. goes back to the movies. I want to go see a movie at some point. But I want to do it low
key.
Tuesday, April 30, 2013,
Wow. Google+. So many pretty girls on there. Seems like a great way to meet girls.
On Smartphones:
My first Smartphone, an LG Verizon Smartphone
Now that I've gotten to break in my new smartphone, I've realized it's a million times better than
a traditional cell phone, or at least a couple thousand. That's how many more different things it
can do. It's like a computer, but in many ways it's even better than that!
Best new toys in my life: The App, LG Smartphone, IGPX Folder, Google+. Best thing EVER!!!
Wednesday, May 1st, 2013,
I might be applying for a job as a stock clerk at the local Scholastic Books manufacturing plant.
No joke. I love Scholastic. Read them growing up. They produce great books for schools and
kids. Great stuff. At least I could be proud of my job if I got one. I'd LOVE to work for
Scholastic. They publish some of my favorite books. They're a REAL publisher! A REAL
publishing job!
Dude! Oliver-E would be PERFECT for Scholastic! And I'd love to show my bosses and
publisher End Times and my art book, just for the hell of it. I mean, hey, if I've got future
connections with Scholastic, why not.

P a g e | 748

Thursday, May 2nd, 2013,

Jobs:

Moderator : Adult Swim Boards

Stock Clerk, Scholastic
Uploader: YouTube and Google
Cartoonist and Underground Comic Book Creator
Novelist
Self-Publisher
TV Show Creator
Screenwriter, Critic
Speculative Web and Software Developer
Dot Com business Founder, Webmaster

Real jobs always have a lot of responsibility included.

I could potentially be earning a salary between $25-$35k or more in the next few months and
years. With that much money I can afford the following things:

A family
A car
A vacation
An apartment
Food
Water
Electricity
Furniture
DVDs
Books
Software
Comics
Funding Streamwave Developers

That's everything I'll ever need. I'll need to do the math in the coming months.
I'd like to turn both Zounds! and Oliver-E and Shadow Walker into children's fantasy and
science-fiction books. I think if I develop a good professional relationship with Scholastic
Books, that can only help my chances of getting published and making a living as a professional
author. I love kids, but I don't specifically write for kids. I write for general audiences, a G rating
like Disney or Marvel or something, and kids are naturally drawn to that. They're a natural
audience and demographic for sci-fi and fantasy. Not just Nickelodeon. If I do break into the

P a g e | 749

children's book and TV market as an author or producer, I want to try my hand at it Jhonen
Vasquez or Doctor Seuss, or George Lucas, or JK Rowling, or Christopher Paolini, or Spielberg
or They Might Be Giants, or Otomo style, where you still do books that are very much for adults.
Friday, May 3rd, 2013,
I seem to be developing a small community of Japanese friends on Google+. This is the perfect
learning experience for me. So far I'm Google+ friends with Sora Takeuchi, Yume
Murakami, Ched Satoshi, Myriam Fourati, Kasumi Suzuki, Haruhi Mitsuki,
Anju Yatawara. These are the first online Asian and Japanese friends I've grown genuinely

close to. This is all thanks to Thomas Romain's influence. I've learned that I want to meet as
many Japanese people as possible, but if I don't want to drive my friends away, I shouldn't
proclaim that. It's too political sounding, that would be my guess. I love meeting Japanese people
online though. A lot of Japanese people watch my YouTube videos and follow my tweets. I'm a
very Japan-Friendly guy. A Foreigner who's not against Japan. That's me! I'm doing a lot better
with my relationships with Japan, if the number of Japanese friends on Google+ that I now have
is any indicator. I'm going to build up my relationships with these people over time.
I'm addicted to talking to Japanese people, communicating with Japan, now that I actually can
with thanks in part going to Google.
Unfortunately, DeviantART kind of encourages racism, xenophobia, and unnecessary Japanese
nationalism biased against America. To say nothing of the arrogance of the artists there. G+ isn't
like that, and I for one am relieved at this new development. There's a unique and diverse
workplace, with all ranges of artistic skill levels, and all levels of national and international
identity. It's a lot easier to get noticed, and just as encouraging in terms of fan support.
Current Jobs to be completed:

Follow up on Scholastic Job

Continue Working for Google
Refine and Develop My Comic Book Page Storytelling Style (More Detail)
Keep Drawing Every or Every Other Day
Accumulate Comics Pages for New Trade Paperback and One-Shot Volumes
Manage YouTube and Twitter Accounts
Moderate Adult Swim Message Boards (IGPX) (if selected)
Write Outlines, Read Outline Book
Buy Groundwork of Evangelion Genga Books
Write More TV Scripts as a Follow-Up to Druidon

Status update for G+. So far, I've gotten 92 +'s in total for all my art uploads at G+.

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People I sort of know:

Steve Blum
Jhonen Vasquez
Katsuhiro Otomo
Ramin Zahed
Thomas Romain
Corey Jackson
Dave Willis
Scholastic
Jerry Conser
Raynart

-------Saturday, May 4th, 2013,

Currently, my own aspiration are on hold to pursue work with some of the world's largest media,
publishing, and TV entertainment companies. I'm a would-be Scholastic Seasonal Employee, and
a Would-Be Honorary Adult Swim IGPX Message Board Moderator, if they approve of me of
course.
Dave Sim wrote me back at Aardvark and Venheim, from his estate, based on the fanmail I sent
him through my cell phone. He offered up great advice about lowering my standards and
improving my comics productivity.
The thing about Dave Sim is, he was indicted on accusations of something so horrible I'm not
even going to write them down. Him and Art Spiegelman. I stayed with him through the
misogyny charges from other creators and fans, and I'll stick with him through this. The comics
matter more to me than the actions of the creator. People could say I'm a criminal too, but there's
no evidence to support it, so they would eventually give up on that front. The key is having the
patience to wait out the storm.

P a g e | 751

Mailbag Time! Email Time!

4 May 13
Joseph Matthew Alberts
spindack@gmail.com
Thanks for your phone message! The sad truth about comic books as a
profession is that, by age 29, you need to be mid career. You really only
have your 20s and 30s at peak energy levels and stamina. The fact that you're
mostly still just working in sketchbooks...well, it's not a good sign. I
would set your sights lower and try to do a few really polished 20 or 30 page
stories in your 30s as a hobby. Definitely no continued stories. Sorry to be
the bearer of such bad news, but that is my best advice.
Dave Sim
-----------------Joseph,

Ah, but I am not an editor anymore, and I have not been for nearly a decade.
And even if I were, these are not sufficient samples for any editor to judge.
You have to have a much larger portfolio than that, and samples with some
purpose or intent. You need to get a lot more done and put together both a
digital portfolio you can show online and one you can show in person (never
attachments in an e-mail, so as not to clog anyone's inbox or be mistaken for
spam)
and
then
get
that
work
in
front
of
actual
editors.
So keep plugging away at it!
Jamie S. Rich
--------Joseph...
...And about your drawings. You sure like to draw a lot. That's a good thing.
But I felt that you need to spend more time on each drawing. Try to push it
further. Add details, draw the faces with more care. You know, I can spend
more than one day on a single drawing, even as a pro. Sometimes you can also
put a new sheet on top of your drawing and redraw it more carefully, adding
details and changing stuff you don't like. You can even do it several times
until you are completely satisfied.
By the way, how old are you? It is an important information to have when you
have to judge somebody's drawings.
Regards
Thomas Romain

P a g e | 752

--------Critics, Peers, have spoken! I'm not putting enough energy and time into the art and comics page
I'm drawing at the moment. I was too busy fantasizing about working 10 times as hard and being
100 times more productive than is realistically possible, I guess. Now that I've made that
mistake of underperformance, under-delivering, and under analyzing my own art, I don't plan on
remaining this blind to what I'm doing wrong. Three of the most prestigious artists and writers in
the world just gave me solid advice, and I don't plan on ignoring it. I want to use the advice
they've blessed me with to get even better. Now that I know what mistakes I'm making, the
biggest mistakes, I can rectify them. I don't draw a thousand pages like Dave Sim and am
relegated to mostly sketchbooks alone because I wasn't built by God like Dave Sim. I was built
as a Joseph. And I don't draw detailed enough like Thomas Romain most of the time yet because
I don't spend the honest amount of time necessary to achieve a level near Thomas Romain. I
need to stop resting on the laurels of my early Journals or Manifesto, as those were written a long
time ago, and ever since I've written them, they've done nothing but slow my real creativity
down.
----------Monday, May 6th, 2013,
I got to try out a preview of the YouTube Marketing service Virool today. It's amazing. I spent
$15, and the video I promoted with that $15 got 450 views in less than 12 hours!
Here's my main flaws:

I don't have a big enough portfolio of decent drawings

I'm not doing anywhere near enough polished comic book pages
I'm not spending enough hours on each sketch and piece of art or drawing
I need to do shorter stories
I need to make my written fiction longer

My WCN End Times commercial got 300 views on YouTube, and 1 comment in a foreign
language. I seem to do better at internet business if I approach it as a hobbyist.
---------------------

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Tuesday, May 7th, 2013,

I'm mid-career level. Apparently being in your late 20s through early 30s means you're midway
through your career.
There are people out there who would STEAL EVERYTHING FROM you right out from under
your nose, without even bothering to make you aware of it, if you let them. That is why above all
else you can't let con artists and marketing scammers get the drop on you. People out there just
waiting to cash in at your expense. Rob you, cheat you, lie to you, swindle you, exploit you, and
steal from you. They're always looking for a "fresh crop" of victims. Don't be one of those
victims. Be vigilant.
I'm definitely not a comics or animation professional. I'm a hobbyist. I'm a professional internet
broadcaster. I actually get paid for that.
Ever since I got demoted to hobbyist, I haven't felt as much compulsion to work as hard. After
all, it's not gonna make me any money. No one's going to see it other than 5 people I don't know
online. What's the point in continuing at such a fast, intense pace, when takin' it easy will do just
fine?
Imagining being an Executive Producer of my own animated series I created, wrote, and
designed, from pilot to episode 26, was a long term fantasy for me at one point. But not
everyone's as lucky as Jhonen Vasquez. Not everyone's a fluke and lucks out momentarily like
that. Most people aren't given managerial and corporate opportunities like that, on that large of a
scale.
----------Wednesday, May 8th, 2013,
The easiest way to increase your luck is to believe in luck. Believe in luck, believe becoming
luckier is possible, and believe you already are lucky, and the energies of the universe will go to
work in proving you right. Luck is linked to the Law of Attraction and Manifestation. When we
think we have good luck, we are good luck, we become good luck. I seek out, discover, use, and
find opportunities most other people do not and never will see. Time to start applying some of
my good luck with life into my creative work. I'm one lucky artist and writer. The better my
habits are, the luckier I become. I'm the luckiest man and artist and writer in the world!!!
I am applying for a job as a stocking clerk at the local Scholastic factory in Lake Mary, FL and
I'm also going to be applying for a job a cashier clerk at the local Home Depot in Casselberry,
FL. I check the job boards quite frequently. My favorite is SimplyHired.com. They have a lot of
good, local openings in retail stores. Once I get one job as a cashier, my first job with a resume
and cover letter, I can get other jobs as a cashier. It's the Art of Cashiering. I've had visions of
myself working a cash register successfully. The difference between now and 2000 in terms of

P a g e | 754

hiring is now everyone gets hired by handing in resumes online to the careers department and
finds work not in the classified, but by looking on job boards like Monster.com and
SimplyHired.com.
So yes, I'm in a transition period. I'm job hunting. Anything involving stocking clerk or cashier
clerk, I'm looking into, on sites like SimplyHired, Monster, and JobSpider. Posting my resume
and experience on various job hunting sites
------Writing Military Fiction:

Technology
Weapons
Vehicles
Ammunition
Government
Political Science
Military Science
Hierarchy
Locations
Soldiers
Transportation
Vehicles
Strategy Science

Sort these various things out and you might just have a story.
Plus, do military research at the library, with books and websites, and by interviewing people in
your own family or extended family who may have served in the military and armed forces.
To write about the military, paramilitary, and armed forces, you kind of need to already know
certain kinds of information about the real world militaries. Like military history, training,
transportation, the science of military strategy, and weaponology. You need to put us right down
there inside the trenches on the frontline itself.
I've finished a total of over 245 pages of comics and sequential art. But I need a lot more. Still, I
have enough for now. If I count my crappy little graphic novel I published on a whim, I've
finished the equivalent of about 14 individual issues. All one-shots. The trade paperback I made
is 7 issues long, and I produced an additional 7 individual issues, so that's 14 issues of my End
Times Series. Some of those pages are sloppy, some are super polished. Some issues are printed
up through a printer. Some are clipped and stapled together by me.

P a g e | 755

So in other words, I'm catching up to other comics artists in terms of productivity. I used to tag
along with the lazy artists and slackers. But the quality of my comics is slowly shaping up and
improving, and achieving polish. I'm happy with that.
Friday, May 10th, 2013,
Even though a lot of people will disagree with this, gambling is awesome. I cashed out $200 in
online gambling, playing the online slots at one casino. And that's for 1 day.
Also, been online, job hunting. So far I've looked into 4 or 5 places. I got 1 job offer through my
smart phone (cell phone) from an insurance company.
So I make money:

S.S.
Uploading, Broadcasting, Adsense
Allowance
Gambling
Self-Publishing

I'm also considering polishing my comics and publishing them for hobby and profit over at
Comixology. There's no guarantee Comixology will pay (Amazon, and Book Tango didn't), but
it's worth a try. I could always advertise my comics on YouTube, Virool, G+, & Twitter.
I'm well beyond the start point on my comic book series, End Times.
I'm on my 300th comic book page. But I've got many more to go.
------Sunday, May 12th, 2013
Action and Comic Book Continuity
The How to Draw Manga Fighting books, with rare exceptions, only educate students of action
comics and shonen-seinen manga in the basics of creating individual poses, anatomical poses
frozen in mid fight, and nothing else. Not punching, kicking, grappling, and fighting as part of a
bigger story, sequential panel composition, and narrative of images and events. In other words,
they've got the poses down, but they fail to cover the comics grammar surrounding it the way
Scott McCloud does, with explanation of comics and panel composition, and what they should
teach, which is how one fight move in one panel moves and transitions smoothly into the next, as
the camera cuts from sequence to sequence. I guess that's gonna be my job: Figuring it all out.
Figuring all that action and fighting out in panel sequence in thumbnails, in sequence. The
rhythm and pacing of the fighting.

P a g e | 756

The answer to the action panel mystery, and how to make the fighting, strikes and action flow on
each page and panel is to map it out with thumbnail, on what I like to call a multi-page thumbnail
panel grid, or thumbnail grid, for short. I think this technique was pioneered by Katsuhiro Otomo
with his manga. I just copied his technique. Production works much more efficiently and faster if
I'm drafting up 6 pages at once on one piece of paper, instead of just drafting 1 page.
When I draw a sword fight or a duel or fist fight or general combat, nowadays, I map it out, 6
pages in advance per page, at a time. Saves me time and effort of ending up doing poorly
composed comic book pages.

Pain is not failure.

Depression, Anxiety, Fretting, Fatigue, Analysis, and Analysis Paralysis are not Failure
Suffering is not Failure.
But it does Hurt. It can hurt and often does.
Pain is only failure if we fail to react and act and take action in respond to it.
Just because you're not working or active doesn't mean you're failing. It could just mean
you need the rest, the rest and relaxation, or sleep and much needed r&r.

Also from Chris Oatley.com:

"If your dream dies, what will you do"
"If my dream dies, what will I do?"
If you are an artists or visual storyteller....
Then keep drawing and telling stories. Realize your pain isn't your failure. Your anxiety isn't
your failure, nor is your fretting about the future, present, or past.
You can't let fluctuations in the industry, society, culture, local city, or economy and big business
kill your creativity. You can't allow that to happen or stop you from plugging away and spending
more time on your work, or spending weeks on one drawing.
And you don't need a job in the animation or comic book industry to validate your calling. Never
again. You should draw and tell the stories inside you even when you're not getting paid.
ESPECIALLY when you AREN'T making a dime
Your dreams don't define you. Never let rewards replace our spiritual sense of purpose.
Even your deeply felt dream of working in animation does not define you.
Yes we all want the animation industry to evolve and prosper, and it probably eventually will.
But as current events prove, the animation industry (and your family, and TV animation) will all
disappoint you sooner or later

P a g e | 757

Instead of sitting around asking "When oh when will I ever achieve my dream?"
You should instead ask "The Dream has Died. It is dead Now what?"
The first choice can lead to bad things, like attempts at suicide, and alcoholism.
My luck is getting better.
The best way to improve your luck, is to think your lucky to begin with. You have to think you're
gold to be gold. My luck increases with the more I believe in it, and the more actively I pursue a
network of people and a successful way of living and thinking.
You have to be willing to keep working, even when there's no one out there who can actually
match your originality and skills. That's part of the responsibility of being a leader. The
loneliness and isolation of victory, a successful manuscript completed, and a job well done.
One of the biggest mistakes in my logic, up till this point, has been overestimating myself. My
ability to produce work on time. that and not believing I can go beyond what I've already drawn
and achieved. The only way I'll improve is to acknowledge I'm always capable of doing better
work. The best drawing you do is the last drawing you do.
There are few things I desire as much as leaving the States for a while as an ex-pat to draw comic
tomes in France, my ancestral homeland. The home country I never knew. It wasn't until a few
years ago, 2012 or so, that I realized the talent I possess isn't just national: It's International. It's
part Chinese and part European, to name some. It doesn't belong in America. Like the visual
sense of design in many French comics, with perspective and density, the drafting and design
sensibilities have too much power for most Americans to understand, let alone appreciate. They
appreciate that sort of thing in France. France might not be recognized in America (yet), but it is
going in the artistic direction I too should be headed, like influencing Japan and Asia and
whatnot.
Tuesday, May 14th, 2013,
My GOD how I'd love to date Chiara Zanni or Tara Strong. They're so sexy. Their voices are a
turn on for me in some ways.
I don't define my self-image or self-confidence by one insult, or one person, or what one person
says or thinks about me, regardless of whether they respect me or not. I care about MAJORITY
opinion. Too MANY people have an opinion on me and my life to let my self-image be governed
or policed by the opinions of 1. I look for opinions that recur and comments that recur numerous
times, not one offhanded time by someone I don't know that well. I don't give a shit how popular
and famous of a celebrity they are. They're opinion is meaningless and worthless to me unless
other people agree with it, and I mean a LOT of people, because there are a lot of people with an

P a g e | 758

opinion about me, and a lot of those views and opinions about me are different. I've heard many
differing views about myself, both online and off. Makes no real difference to me.
So I was talking to my new online female friend from my little online support network on
Google, and I was surprised how much I realized about my art simply by talking about it to her.
For instance, though she had nothing but positive, kind things to say about my work, if you ask
me, my comics pages are just awful compared to my sketchbook pages. I can draw regular
sketches, but when you are required to tell stories with sequential art, it becomes 10 times
harder, and you have to learn to compensate in order to learn the skill of making comics pages.
No one's going to mentor you in comics more than likely, unless you're REALLY, REALLY
lucky. Most pro comic book artists had to teach themselves how to draw comics, and that's an
INCREDIBLY DIFFICULT THING TO DO.
To become anything, I'm going to have to run away one day. But I would be missed dearly. That
much I can see now. My family is afraid of me moving out. They got a severe case of separation
anxiety when I moved to Fort Lauderdale to attend art school.
There aren't that many prominent and or infamous people to compare myself to who are of the
same range of age, age-wise.
I mean, really: Who?

Half the ASMB?

CidTheKittyIsFun?
Panda Baka?
Bryan Johnston?
Kristy Lijewski?
Jared Cibos?
Lindsey Cibos?
Mark Zuckerberg?
Britney Spears?
Felipe Smith?

-----Note to Self.
Look up The Smithsonian and Library of Congress in Washington, D.C.
-------

P a g e | 759

Thursday, May 16th, 2013,

I've been meaning to start my own online business.
I have 2 ideas for online businesses. One for user security, the other for an online TV Network
website. But the webhosting services aren't cutting edge enough to host my content yet. I've got
to wait for some of this internet technology to catch up to my broadcasting ideas. I tried
YouTube, which is good for some things, but not all things. And I tried Glomera and Justin.tv,
which both are limiting in some ways, but efficient in others. I just hope someone starts making
more Glomera and Justin.tv knockoffs, something with a similar technological format and
uploading structure, that's not Swedish, and doesn't accidentally wipe out your entire video hard
drive or whatever. Hate when that happens.
I'm a speculative developer. I do all my work and inventing without knowing or using source
code.
Selling Points:
Sell With Ingenuity
Sell With Power and Influence
Sell With Mystery and Mystique
Sell With Prestige and Respect
Sell With Complexity
Sell With Fortitude
Sell With Innovation and Originality
My dad might be working his way to the pits of Hell, where he will burn for all eternity, well, if
his medical, psychological, and emotional treatment of me and Andrew is any indicator. I want
to let him finish living then go die and rot in the ground, but I don't want him to drag me down
into Hell with him, cuz with his "special" brand of narco therapy, that is in fact where he's
headed: Hell.

P a g e | 760

Chapter 18

P a g e | 761

Friday, May 17th, 2013,

I've found an efficient way to outline and organize the stories for my scripts I write. Now that
I've already written 1 complete script, the task actually seems to be getting easier.
I start by looking in my stories for a solid Beginning, Middle, and Ending.
The I create and Build a system in the story of my script. Each scene becomes a document, so I
leave myself with some room to work and re-arrange my stories, scenes, and scripts. That way
instead of my scenes being bullet-point sentences, they're software documents that give me room
to work.
Scripts are like houses. You have to Build them from Ground Zero, and approach their
construction compartmentally.
End Times: Development Notes.
Illustrating each issue is going to require more development sketches. Everything, and Everyone,
and Everyplace that appears in the series needs to be drawn out, in depth, visually, with sketches
and art. Anything that appears in any and all panels ever, needs to be extensively developed.
Tuesday, May 21st, 2013

Skills I'm working on:

Writing Business Plans
Thinking Like an Entrepreneur
Developing a Business Structure
Ally Teaming
Team-Building
Viral Marketing

P a g e | 762

Things to be done:

Be patient
Wait until beginning of next month
Wait for paychecks
Work on sketching and comics
Don't go crazy
Keep up with smartphone
Write in Journal
Listen to radio on internet
Wait for response from Thomas Romain
Keep Twitter and YouTube and Rhapsody active
Watch Digital Videos
Write Scripts
Save up money
Take showers and do laundry
Blog and Tweet
Write Novel
Upload Videos to Google Docs
Take Coursera University of Maryland Class
Keep in contact with lena
Write business plan
Develop and attain patents
----------

Wednesday, May 22nd, 2012

Things left to do:

Put money into my viral video campaigns

Buy Wirecast software
Get Justin.tv to work.
Save up money. Keep wiring
Play the Slots
Rip Vids
-------

P a g e | 763

Thursday, May 23rd, 2013,

I've reached the next level of online broadcasting. RIGHT NOW. What's in my bag of tricks?

Telestream's Wirecast Software, which is expensive, but necessary

Showcaster.com for live broadcasts to the masses
Google Docs and Blogger for video embedding and publishing
Twitter and YouTube and Blogger and Google+ for marketing my channel, once I own
wirecast officially and a publishing presence is established.

For now, that's the plan of attack.

My programming will consist entirely of video files from my hard drive.
-------------------Friday, May 24th, 2013,
For the remainder of 2013, I'm going to be amping up my efforts to write more scripts. I'll
continue art too, because that's what I do, but writing is assured. More scripts with more dialogue
and description are assured.
All that computer and digital and home electronics lingo, jargon, and lexicography. 15 years ago,
it didn't even exist, and I can't imagine my life without its minutest details now. Now all my
journals are backed up in a Google cloud, as will my video files and DVD content will also be
one day, somewhere other than YouTube. Especially if I get funding to start my own venture.
Technology has increased in speed, diversity, and efficiency. Now technology that integrates the
concepts of place-shifting and time-shifting exists frequently in everyday use. Even on cellular
phones! This might not seem so mind-boggling to some young people now, but now it's a lot
different than it was when I was growing up. You know, before I was in the middle of Turning
30, and entering my 30s.
First there was time-shifting (DVR). Then there was place shifting (YouTube, Netflix).
Saturday, May 25th, 2013,
I'm considering looking back through my notes of Mono Drawings, New-Earth Writings,
Concept Art Sketches and Illustration-Designs, Scripts, and Outlines, and self-publishing them as
a book, called (what else?) The Parallax Notes.
----------------------

P a g e | 764

Saturday, May 25th, 2013,

My essay column about famed creator Dave Sim, and his comic Cerebus, got featured on the
number 1 Google-ranked Cerebus fan website: A Moment of Cerebus. Everything I contributed
is there: My name (Joseph Alberts), my essay column, a link to my website. EVERYthing!!
Yeah!!! Go me. I'm happy about this turn of events. Really encouraging. I'm interested in hearing
Dave Sim's thoughts on my column.
But what now. Where do I go from here. I'm apparently on top of the world.
I've written about Dave Sim and his genius a lot in this journal. He's really been very reliable
throughout the years. He does what he says, and I admire that. I wonder what's for dinner.
I'm glad the internet does qualify as literature.
I was always a big fan of Stephen King. I'm a huge literature geek buff. I always loved how
Stephen King, in nearly all his novels referenced pop culture and the supernatural:
Simultaneously and phonetically.
I don't know if I'm a tastemaker, or if I have an influential opinion, but my thoughts seem to
carry a lot of weight. Especially lately. That's kind of the Master Number 22's whole thing
according to Numerology. The Master Builder.
Currently, I'm working on The Parallax Notes. These notes are going to take forever to compile!
It will be worth it though, if it leads to those 1 or 2 finished series bible manuscript(s).
Success begets productivity and prolificacy. I'm no Dave Sim, or Osamu Tezuka, but I'm
productive. I've done a ton of shit. I forgive me for my shitty work, purely because I've done
enough general work to compensate for it.
God I love Rhapsody. The updated version of Napster. That's what it is essentially. Sure there's a
subscription fee, but the fact that it lets me listen to infinite music is a huge benefit. I finally have
music in my life again. Shit man, I might even buy a guitar and drumset again.
Revamped shows: Captain Simian and the Space Monkeys. Daria. Animaniacs. All very good
shows in my opinion. Well worth watching online at least. Let's hear it for old shit. Fuck the
stupid new shit. No, seriously. My bloodstream needs old shit to survive! I traffic in nostalgia. If
nostalgia was a drug, I'd be one of the pushers.
Professional Outlets I've been published in:
AnimeTV (Anime Written Review)
Animation Magazine (Pitch Party 2012, "Parallax: The Chronicles of Mono Jubei")
A Moment of Cerebus ("Life After Cerebus")

P a g e | 765

I've done a whole lot of less official, more underground stuff.

----------Monday, May 27th, 2013,
Not a big fan of shows, cartoons, and websites that profit on ruining other people's reputations.
What kind of sick fucks get their jollies off of shit like that anyway?
You know? I think the whole "marketing publicity" thing could really work out for me. I'm
starting to warm up to the idea of getting free publicity for my comic books online with
databases and Lulu storefronts. I'm already getting a few hits, which is really great. If you use
publicity, they will come.
Tuesday, May 28th, 2013,
There's a few things I need to do.

Stop trying to prove to the world how powerful my personality and persona are. With
self-hypnosis.
Separate my work and labor in the literary and cinematic arts from my mental and
psychological emotions and state of mind. Just do the work. Stop fretting and feeling
anxiety about it. Is it really that burdensome and painful?

Some words came up in my psychic reading.

Martial. Self-sufficient. Intuitive. Headstrong and Tenacious.
In the near future, I'll be launching my first full time Online TV Network.
Action-ToonsTV. The World's First 24/7 (or at the very least 12 hours a day), Action Cartoons,
Anime, and Animation Channel, and it will be online, at a unique URL. My rationale: There's
been action programming blocks on TV, but no YouTube channel or regular online TV network.
I aim to engineer, program, and build one with algorithms and playlists I picked up and taught
myself. With the power of Wirecast 2 or 3, Showcaster, and Google Sites, it makes my job that
much easier. Just add video files. It could turn out to be quite profitable. I have a large library of
shows and video files to choose from. My previous attempts at channels were Sam and Max on
Glomera, and OP Wizard, which never got off the ground from an engineering perspective,
unlike the Sam and Max Freelance police channel.
I've also been doing some publicity for End Times. It's now ranked as 1,000th or so out of a
directory of more than 21,000 different comics. So it's doing well.

P a g e | 766

Wednesday, May 29th, 2013,

I don't give up easily. Actually I never give up unless it's for necessary survival, and even then I
can be reluctant.
Thing I'd have given up on a long time ago if my will wasn't so powerful...

YouTube
Art
Adsense
Blogger
Leaving the House
Writing Fiction
Painting
Drawing
TV

Thursday, May 30th, 2013,

With a little, or maybe a lot of, luck, ActionToonTV may actually happen! I have the URLs, but
there are still some missing pieces, like all the video files I need to rip DVDs to create more of.

Showcasing digital files

Uploading digital files
Storing digital files

Kind of my whole bag of tricks.

Friday, May 31st, 2013,
ActionToonTV could very well consume a lot of my time, what with broadcasting, loading time,
editing, saving, strategizing, listing, downloading, and search engine optimization.
Things I need to do:

Check Webcomic Stats and standing in directories

Continue with Coursera Class
Brush my Teeth (not optional)
Manage ActionToonTV
Work on Search Engine Optimization

P a g e | 767

ActionToonTV: I actually have over 700 episodes available for broadcast on my

network. And that's not counting all the downloads from YouTube and Digital
Arsenal.
So it's really over 1,000 videos worth of airtime, with more than half of
those, or 500-600 being 30 minute episodes. It'll take forever to compile,
but the end product will be well worth it. I hope to reach the point of being
able to broadcast, easily and seamlessly, every day of the week.
Ted Turner started off with the Hannah Barbera library to launch Cartoon Network. I'm
launching with my digital library.
Hurray! I'm finally taking entrepreneurial risks again! Good things tend to happen when I take a
few risks...Well, for me anyway.
The first program I'm airing on ActionToonTV, is a video or videos that are very important to
me: The Megamix(es). Those videos are what started it all. They're very powerful and energetic
videos. I'll be airing those on my channel a lot, purely BECAUSE YouTube rejected me
uploading them so much. It's only fair I pay them back by showing people what's really going on.
After I play those for a few 12-hour cycles, I'll get down to business.
Strategy talk: ripping those videos is going to take many hours. But nothing I wasn't able to
accomplish previously. Plus I think Wondershare will work better on my computer, now that it
runs on Windows 7 like my dad's software does on his comp.
2 things that will take a lot sorting/hours:

Ripping
Editing
Loading

I've pretty much got Telestream Wirecast figured out, so functionality isn't a problem. It's the
internal data on the site, getting things up and running on my comp to begin with.
Then I gotta:

Pick out shows

Pick a schedule
Pick episodes
Pick promos
Arrange everything

That's pretty much it.

P a g e | 768

Solo broadcasting is serious work: It takes money, the right OS, hardware, knowledge of video
file formats on the computer, tenacity, patience, and a knowledge of the content you broadcast,
as well as the content format.
I'm one of the first post-YouTube (former YT-Maverick) solo broadcasters. I got tired of
YouTube's ad and copyright restriction with my anime videos, so I decided to pursue my own
venture in online broadcasting, using whatever initial tools were available to me (namely
Wirecast software and sites like Justin.tv (currently I'm using Showcaster).
Once again, I'm solo pioneering an entirely new medium and genre: Broadcasting of online
action cartoons. Like Toonami or Boomeraction, Jetix, or Adult Swim ACTN, but within a
longer duration of daily to weekly programming (not to mention a more inconsistent schedule,
less power, an infinitely smaller budget), only I have no clue what I'm doing...BECAUSE I'm the
first one to do it. In a way, I'm one of the great pioneers of the modern and digital era.
Wow. My new website seems to be giving me an enormous amount of influence, even when it's
in beta mode. But I'm not running the site for power. YouTube already gave me plenty of that.
I'm launching ActionToonTV to fill an unmet need, namely a solid and consistent broadcasting
of action-related cartoons and anime. For free. No cost to the viewer. I don't "charge for my
work". That's not really how it works in broadcasting. In online broadcasting, it's all about
viewership, which is actually something I'm quite good at in some respects.
---------Places I've Been To, and wouldn't mind living in:

D.C. Maryland
Chicago, Kankakee, Illinois
Ann Arbor, Michigan
South Florida (Miami, Ft. Lauderdale)
North Florida, Tallahassee

Uncharted Wilderness:

Los Angeles, California

Atlanta, Georgia
Boulder, Colorado
Paris, France
Toronto, Canada
Tokyo, Japan

P a g e | 769

Fort Worth, Texas

San Francisco, California

My Life Journey...will never be Complete. Which is not to say I won't attain closure, but there's
a difference between the two. I'm a work in progress.
I'm a Work In Progress. You're a Work In Progress. We Are All Works In Progress, until our
dying day, more often than not. Even with people like George Lucas and J.D Salinger. Their
private lives were as much of a work in progress as their works and reputation. Change is always
happening, and it is inevitable. Best to be prepared for it.
I used to think comics was about standing out, doing your own thing, being an individual, being
yourself. But you would be surprised how eager to conform so many young artists in the comic
and manga industry are. It's like they have no real drive, or ambition. Just do what someone (a
more famous artist or editor or producers) orders them to do, then get the hell out of the
room/studio and go home. Do what they're told, then leave. I don't function that way. And
because of that, because I do show signs of individuality, because I am a character with a
personality of sorts, I was chastised and penalized for it. Kind of a rude awakening. I got in a lot
of trouble for essentially being too bright and loud and talkative in comparison to other artists. It
was a shame realizing the comic book industry works like that much of the time. Like every
other business where dollars are worshipped, and cocky assed snot nosed punk kid superstars get
their asses kissed and licked, instead of kicked and handed back to them. It's called the status
quo.
---------Saturday, June 1st, 2013,
End Times is getting some of its best online ratings and readership numbers ever, now that it's
listed in certain webcomic directories. In one directories it led to as many as 1,050 views of my
online comic book series. I'll have to update that thing...eventually. Right now I'm just enjoying
the spotlight. How every time I leave my house, it's news and TV fodder.
I'm good at crime show, crime movie, and cop show dialogue. I'm actually very good at gritty
first-person dialogue. I write what my gut and Tommy Gun tell me to write.
If there's one pop culture phenomenon as good and cool as the gangster and international crime
film, it is the gangster and crime film soundtrack.
I've learned the hard way, you have to play to your strengths when developing stories: Or Else.
Or else you'll probably fail if you don't stick to what you're good at.
For instance, I know what I excel at: Writing scripts and outlines. So if I've got an idea in my
head, I'm 5 times more likely to develop it as a script than as a comic or sketchbook, so no

P a g e | 770

visuals. Just descriptions and action, unless it's a storyboard. So from this point on, I want
something on the page or screen built or developed, whether a movie or comic, I build onto it by
mapping it out with a series of literary blueprints I like to call "loglines", "outlines" and "scripts".
If I can't think to draw or feel up to it, I write. I keep myself busy. If I'm not writing narration and
outlines, I write character bios, story logline and conceptual development, dialogue, and
descriptions. Data just sort of comes to me. Screenwriting isn't so hard if you keep at it.
One thing good about being a writer? It's not a "chick magnet profession" no female sex groupies
attempting to hit on you to worry about. Writing online is the anti-aphrodisiac.
I'm a travel and aviation fan, so I can really appreciate the amazing graphics in these new flight
and driving simulator games that you can find on the PC.
------Wednesday, June 5th, 2013,
ActionToonTV.com is the #2 search result when you type Cartoon Network into a Google search
engine. I feel very lucky to have been bestowed such influence by Google and CN.
Action Toons FTW!!!
If this channel is going to survive, I'm going to need a strategy.
There's the filler material. Dozens of hours of box set DVD rips of my favorite anime and action
cartoon shows, once I GET THEM RIPPED, that is.
And then there will be the stuff with Toonami and Adult Swim footage, and various forms of
DVD interstitials, which is essentially me branding my channel. Dressing it up, decorating it, and
essentially making an effort to make it seem like a real TV channel, what with Live and or Live
streaming pre-recorded broadcasts. IF I can figure out how to get the Wirecast device to work.
Wondershare is great for ripping, as long as it doesn't cut off the footage too early.
God I love working in TV. I like being the President, Creator, and Executive Producer of my
own action cartoon channel. I get to do anything I want essentially, assuming I make a little bit
of time for it. Whether or not it will be profitable has yet to be determined, especially now that
Cartoon Network and Google are promoting me in their search results, "for being nice to them",
which is awesome and a very sweet thing to do.

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Currently, I am:

Creating, Founding, Funding, Programming and editing my commercially-based solo

operational stand alone video website, ActiontoonTV
Studying and Working for online classes with the University of Michigan and the
University of Maryland.
Fixing my computer
Maintaining a relationship online with Cartoon Network and French Createur Thomas
Romain
Promoting my webcomic, End Times
Compiling The Parallax Notes

Notes to Self:
Add Essays and Poems to Google Doc Writing Archives.
Few Things I need to do:

Make my interior sequential art pages quality match the quality of my comics covers.
Fill up my fight daydream choreography design sketchnote book.

Thursday, June 6th, 2013,

Comics: Structure Strategy. Structural Strategy.

Covers will be black (dominant) (composition)

Interior Pages will be white with some black (dominant) (Bone, Cerebus, Scud, Jhonen,
McFarlane)

Covers Will Be: Notan, Neo-Noir

Interiors Will Be: "sketch-booky" and intense, aggressive, designy, stylish, and fast, with
speed-lines, and costumes. A mixture. Hybrid. A mixture of my favorite interior comic
book styles. Indie and manga. (Tezuka, Hiroaki Samura, Jeff Smith, Jim MAhfood, Rob
Schrab, Jhonen, McFarlane).

Covers: Complex with a lot of negative space and black ink.

Interiors: White with a lot of simplicity.

P a g e | 772

----------

I'm keeping three different types and categories of sketchbooks.

Comics Layouts (Roughs, Thumbnail Panels, Panels, Storytelling, Gestures, Shot

Transitions, Cuts)
Inking/Polish (Black, Sharpie Marker, Notan, Noir, Cel Shading, Printouts/Books,
Covers, Noir)
Action (fighting, choreography, fight compositions, camera shots, speed lines, poses,
motion, speed)

Each one applies to a different main element of what I do with my art.

Comics are for the actual sequential art

Inking is for covers and pin-ups
Action is for a large part of what gives my work it's power and appeal

Friday, June 7th, 2013,

Unfortunately, a video cloud storage website would cost a fortune to build and operate.
Working in Japanese anime as an American and/or Westerner is equally impossible. Just learn to
work in America and learn to enjoy it. Because more than likely the Japanese will not welcome
you to the Japanese market as a foreigner any more than just to keep up appearances on the
surface.
Sunday, June 9th, 2013,
What an honor! One of the 2 most famous anime screenwriters in the entire world was browsing
my online LinkIn profile not long ago. Savin Yeatman-Eiffel, of Sav! The World Productions. I
never foresaw such a turn of luck happening to me in a thousand years, let alone in 2013!
I know great animation writers, and then there are the greatest:

Yoshiyuki Tomino (Gundam Creator)

Savin Yeatman-Eiffel (Oban Star-Racers)
Dai Sato
Aaron McGruder (The Boondocks
Jhonen Vasquez (Invader Zim)

These 5 goldenboy writers are many of the greatest animation writers I've ever seen. At least in
terms of on screen drama. Now that I've got Savin Yeatman-Eiffel's very important and valuable
attention, I can't afford to waste it. If I get to talk to him online, I think I'll inquire within for

P a g e | 773

advice in the screenwriting biz, whether it's TV or feature film, anime or western animation
literature and writing.
Monday, June 10th, 2013,
The Fame and Power List
The Most Influential People I've Ever Met (in my life) (either directly or through the media).
And famous people who share commonalities with myself.
1. Barack Obama
2. William the Conqueror
3. Arnold Schwarzenegger
4. Quentin Tarantino
5. Tom Cruise
6. Steven Spielberg
7. George Lucas
8. J.K. Rowling
9. Stephen King
10. Katsuhiro Otomo
11. Musashi Kishimoto
12. John Lasseter
13. Howard Stern
14. Marilyn Manson
15. Savin Yeatman-Eiffel
16. Thomas Romain
17. Eric P Sherman
18. Tite Kubo
19. Thom Yorke
20. Trent Reznor
21. Rivers Cuomo
22. My Biological Father
23. Steven Jay Blum
24. Todd McFarlane
25. Jhonen Vasquez
26. Brian Michael Bendis
27. Aaron McGruder
28. Seth MacFarlane
29. Seth Green
30. Chris Prynoski
31. Ben Kalina
32. J.G. Quintel

P a g e | 774

33. Tara Strong

34. Steven Colbert
35. Rob Thomas
36. Johnny Yong Bosch
37. Lance Heiskell
38. Dave Sim
39. Eric Fogel
40. Doug TenNapel
41. Rima Jabbur
42. Nicole Cook
43. Jamie S. Rich
44. Jerry Conser
45. Matt Cicero
46. Phil Ferretti
47. Roy Pitts
Online pals:
1. Myself
2. Obama
3. YouTube
4. Google
5. Twitter
6. Toonami
7. Anime
8. Will Street
9. Adult Swim
10. Steven Jay Blum
11. Thomas Romain
12. Bang Zoom! Entertainment
13. Manga Entertainment
14. Ramin Zahed
15. Ben Kalina
16. Chris Prynoski
17. Fung Chin Pang
18. Corey Jackson
19. LeSean Thomas
20. A Moment of Cerebus
21. Raynart Tradnor
22. Stonergoth 187
23. Vampire Akito

P a g e | 775

24. Lindsey Vest

Chick magnet, yes, but European and Asian chick magnet. Never would have guessed.
The luck assisting my recovery process has been amplified, ever since I could sense my adoptive
brother Andrew and his horrible wife were finally going to be out of my hair. Forever.
A miracle has shifted the balance of power. He even attempted to barricade the garage and his
bedroom as a going away present.
------Tuesday, June 11th, 2013,
The following professional writers and artists have critiqued my work...

Phil Ferretti
Rima Jabbur
Jamie S. Rich
Corey Jackson
Richard Stack
Thomas Romain
Dave Sim
Andrew Ahn

I'm seem to have turned into a bit of a romantic. Even with a minimal female presence around.
Some lady across the street kept staring into my window. Seemed a little weird. She was kind of
far away. I wonder why she was looking into the window of my house. Maybe she could watch
my TV and computer from there.
-------Thursday, June 13th, 2013,
New concept and theory I discovered:
Continuity Dynamics: How the camera angle and shot size/shot cuts from panel to panel. This
applies to Comic Books, Image Boards, and Animation Storyboards.
Continuity dynamics, or "cutting" is what gives comics a real sense of cinema and storytelling
dynamics. If it's a comic book and doesn't have any Continuity Dynamics, it may as well be a
crappy little comic strip, or a roll of film, where nothing changes from panel to panel.

P a g e | 776

My Continuity Dynamics are getting a lot better, in both my thumbnails and rough drafts. I'm
using more close ups and over-the-shoulder cuts. I feel like I don't even need to use those silly
Aspect Angles all the time. That just sort of feels like showing off, but not necessarily getting a
point across.
"You have to be willing to ignore the market rather than follow it, because you want to take
advantage of the markets mistakes"
--Bill Gates
On LinkedIn
What an insightful article he wrote. I've got to capitalize on the segment of the market being
under-served.
So what's under-served?

Data Storage
Comics
Screenwriting
Online Video Broadcasting
Seinen anime and manga
Fighting artwork in comics and anime
French Dramatic Animation
Franco-Belgian Comics
Euro Co-Productions
Dramatic, Violent Action Films, Comics, and Animation
NOT Japan
France
Hong-Kong
Online Networking (LinkedIn, Twitter, YouTube)

Though I'm crashing, at least I can say today wasn't a total waste. I got 3 comics pages done.
I'm overstimulated. Fame and Power are overstimulating.
Most European and Asian writer-artists are content and happy as clams to work for no rewards,
including money. That being part of my heritage, I feel that way to a degree too. But the internet
has spoiled me with an audience, unfortunately. It's a recurring (and unnecessary) desire to have
someone check up on you, to know what you're up to, to know what you're doing. That's more of
the American way. The "I want to be spoiled rotten by hangers-on, groupies, and an audience"
mentality.

P a g e | 777

Friday, June 14th, 2013,

Frankly, there are only four main goals of self-aggrandizement any artist has going into a TV or
comic book deal: Money, Sex, Power, and Fame. With maybe a little bit of drugs and friendship
on the side, like a good fattening fast food meal from some burger joint, that's horrible for you.
You publish for fame, power, and sex, to impress girls, and to dominate the world. EVERYONE
does in America. That's the whole point of this thing.
You practice and train to make your drawings better, tighter, more polished, more dynamic, and
more powerful
Pretty much all there is to it. You train to improve your power and strength, and you promote
yourself for the glory.
--------------Saturday, June 15th, 2013,
According to Klout, my social media power level is actually getting pretty high for a Klout
Score. I'm currently at 40 out of 100.

P a g e | 778

Damn. These drawings are AMAZING! I'm getting a lot better at art. I can actually draw now.
More so than previously. And the best part of that is it seems like I'm finally not the only one
who noticed. From now on, I think I'm mostly going to draw with regular old highly sharpened
#2 pencils. Pencil sketching everything in (lightly at first, with much erasing), to get the whole
drawing in there (then fleshing everything out with darkened lines and shading) is really working
out for me. My "detail power-level" is increasing. I never drew this good in art school. Well,
Crealde and Rima Jabbur aside.
I'm not trying to be "cool", per say. I probably couldn't draw any better than I already do even IF
I moved to Tokyo. This is probably as good as my artwork gets. If I were any better I'd be
working professionally as an artist in manga and anime over in Japan. But I've realized I can't sit
around waiting to move to Japan to increase my skills by mysticism, magic, and whatnot. I'm
going to have to learn to accept where I ALREADY am. I'd love to move to France, Japan,
Canada, Hong-Kong, or L.A., and draw there where I could learn from the best. But I don't have
the money, resources, or industry connections for that. I'm just going to have to teach myself to
get better, Right Here, Right Now. But fortunately that's not unheard of, as I already seem to be
Growing and Transforming as an Artist. My style is Evolving to Something Higher. I'm finally
Transcending some of my Bad Habits. It's a great feeling.
"How do you draw better as an artist?"? I've realized I need to watch myself drawing. I need to
notice and catch myself when I'm in mid process, and get lazy and impatient, or both. I make
mistakes when I get impatient with my process; LOTS of mistakes. I also think it's important to
fill up the whole composition and form of a drawing with light scribbles and line work, BEFORE
you commit to any individual part of the drawing too much. I think having a TV beside my
drawing table helps keep me from getting bored while I draw.
Link is a big influence on my own characters, the swordsmen.
I know it's not the best idea to talk to yourself about your secret techniques when you're sitting
pretty, but that's just part of my style.
Now that I have all the time in the world on my hands, and many decades of survival in store for
the future, I think I'll refine my abilities a little bit. Starting with art and drawing. I "wanted to"
draw. Now I'm doing that, so no complaints. No people around. Just pencils and blank paper. I'm
not sure what I'm going to do next, but I am looking forward to it, just as everyone else is.
Mania and Energy Drinks definitely help my energy levels. And sometimes, just sometimes,
sleep helps, if I'm depressed and therefore tired. I free the Beast on the Blank Page, with pens,
pencils, and a keyboard. Mostly because I don't have an electric guitar with a fuzz box. So I do
the next most Brutal Thing. I write. And sometimes. JUST SOMETIMES...I draw. Everything
else doesn't matter. I work. That matters. How I'm doing and WHAT I'm doing isn't important.
Not in my book. I only really care about channeling high levels of energy on the page, and words
and artwork. As long as that keeps getting channeled for at least a few hours a day, I'm not

P a g e | 779

entirely miserable. If all that was taken away, as it almost was, I'd be a sad panda. And I can't
exactly accept that, unfortunately. Nor can I accept other people entirely. I still consider myself a
solo act. A loner who doesn't attach himself to worldly excess, especially not when I'm working.
I'm a noisemaker. Well, my magnetism is anyway. Sometimes noisy people are drawn to me. But
I have no control over that. It's like they're hypnotized into being noisy and disruptive or
something. Fucking brainwashed motherfuckers. Fucking HATE em. They'll believe anything as
long as they see it on a TV screen. They're weak-willed. I have a lot of fortitude and willpower. I
do not consider those things to be anything remotely resembling a secret.
J.M.
You couldn't HANDLE my girlfriend, bitch.
JG
Yeah!? Well, well I MET HER DAD.
J.M.
You want Nicole so much, asshole? You can have Nicole, and
the annoying life-ruining shit that goes along with her. All
ever did was slow me down anyway. Annoying. Be careful what
wish for, jerk. You seem to want all the pussy, with none of
work. Great strategy there, pal.

all
she
you
the

--------Like I said. I've moved past Nicole. She's no longer my partner. Mostly because I got fed up with
all her shit. I think I need to see other people. LOTS OF other people. But probably not anytime
soon. Eventually. I REALLY need to see other people. Getting so TIRED of all this relationship
BULLshit. Watching her get everything handed to her for knowing me (not someone else) then
watching myself take all the heat for it. Fuck that. I'm sick of that bullshit.
I'm tired. Of a lot of things.
So I discovered a new TV channel today: Cinemoi'. A French and International channel that
mostly plays French and French related movies, along with some other international segments
and shows. They're covering the Cannes Film Festival on TV Today. Paris isn't so scary. I think
fear of French culture is irrational and xenophobic. I always have. Why would I be afraid of my
OWN heritage and previously unbeknownst spiritual kinship. Sure beats Turner Classic Movies.
That channel really, REALLY sucks. It's the cranky old man of TV channels. And they don't
even play any GOOD old movies either, like Birth of a Nation, or Metropolis, or French Noir. It
sucks. Well, it's purely America so that's no big surprise. Things are usually like that in America.
It's American made and tastes like shit for a movie or TV show, but Yer Livin in AMERIKA,

P a g e | 780

dammit! You will watch what we tell you to, and NOTHING MORE! Fortunately I'm not one of
the weak willed, so I'm not susceptible to blatant influence like that the way Andrew is.

The market for American Fantasy Graphic Literature of the "Jeff Smith's Bone" variety is
strongest, and most healthy, in France, North America, Italy, Germany, Belgium, Spain,
Finland, and Norway. That's quite a selection. Japan's a bit ambivalent about that kind of thing,
certainly a lot more so than Europe is.
If I do make a living from my art or writing, which I'm not sure if I will, currently I'm planning
on donating 50% of my income to international charities. I don't want to just keep and take. I
want to give, not to my community or family who I see every day, but to people I don't even
know the world over. I want to take the good humanitarian example my Glendis left me with,
and carry the torch in some way, shape or manifested form. You can only intellectualize so much
without actually taking some form of action.
Monday, June 17th, 2013,
Some young kids like calling everything "anime" or "manga", even when it's not. Like what I do
with comics. Definitely NOT manga. I'm doing my own thing. I'm not trying to emulate a genre
or style. Not anymore anyway. What I do is good enough for me, and that's pretty much all I care
about. Well that, and Thomas Romain and Savin Yeatman-Eiffel's opinions of me and my work.
My favorite People: Steven Jay, Thomas, Savin, Raynart, Fung Chin Pang, G+.
As for me? I never say "No"!
My new girlfriends are WAY better than Nicole. WAY BETTER. Meeting girls online is great! I
get all the sex I can handle, or at least the equivalent thereof. Nicole was quite a bit pretentious,
manipulative, and annoying. I'm glad I'm finally moving on. I finally get to date again. So I get
to meet my needs for sexuality and move on from Nicole at the same time. And these girls love
me too. Win/Win baby! I've already seen her sprawled out for me. Makes me happy. AM I in
love. Maybe a bit.
Tuesday, June 18th, 2013,
I think "pro-copyright" "antipiracy legislation" is being used and abused by traditional media
(TV, anime, music, movies) as a form of attempting to regulate inflation to the barrier-to-entry of
a medium it fails to control so far, in reality. Don't just let this happen, Congress.
Places online where people gather to talk about me a lot, almost like an online convention...

YouTube
DeviantART

P a g e | 781

Megatokyo
Groupie Central
Adult Swim
Twitter

Apparently, somehow, people think I married Nicole. A lot of people online seem to think I'm
married to Nicole. While I do consider her a life partner in some ways, I've never been married to
any woman. I look at forward slash jerk it to porn and flirt with girls online, and that's pretty
much it. There really aren't any "sexual exploits" to indulge the public in. Not with a female
anyway. OR any other gender. I lead a simple life. I don't know why everyone on the internet
says I'm a rockstar. I know me flying solo is gonna break a lotta ladies hearts, but I guess the
truth hurts and breaks hearts. Especially the hearts of all those ladies that seem to want to be my
"lover". I'm not against marriage necessarily, but my social life has never been active enough to
support a marriage. Sorry ladies, I'm NOT taken.
Wednesday, June 19th, 2013,
My power is an aphrodisiac, apparently. And a huge turn on for the ladies as a matter of fact.
I'm actually a lot more powerful in reality than I thought I was.
One example of how attractive I am to the ladies is Groupie Central in the last few years. There
were 120 message board posts about me and the girls in my life over at a recent disussion thread
at Groupie Central, an old school Voy Forum Message Board. Ah yes, I remember Voy Forums,
it's where I made my internet debut, on sites like the Celeb Atheists Message Board
(celebatheists.com), as "jared", and the Roman Dirge "Spookyland" (spookyland.com) Message
Boards, as "Noomoo," and "Noom", where I achieved much controversy among the goth comic
book fans who follow Roman. Let's just say I didn't leave the best of impressions with everyone.
Some people there loved me. Not everyone. Including the webmaster, Christopher Higginson
Ah, the "good" old days.
----------Things you can do with your voice (The Power of Voice)

Commercials (V.O.)
Voiceover
Voice Acting
Singing
Radio
Music
Anime
Comedy

P a g e | 782

Drama
----------

Saturday, June 22nd, 2013,

If you don't have a sex life, and are still a virgin, it's okay to be okay with sex, and sexual
thoughts. Just because you don't have a partner-based sex life (which I don't. I'm still a virgin),
you still have sexuality in your life, actions, and thought process. How you express that sexuality
and sex drive is up to you. But don't forget: Girls and women like to see your penis. Well, most
girls and women anyway. So if you get a boner around a girl you like, that won't necessarily be
offensive or scary to them. The penis is to girls what the boobs and vagina are to men. I
discovered how to talk to girls in 2002. I discovered how to get intimate with a lady in 2012.
--------I finished a total of 200 pages of comics practice artwork recently. The art really sucks, but the
important part is my graphic novel is now 200 pages, when binded together. That's the equivalent
of 10 issues of Cerebus. Or 10 issues of Jhonen's Johnny the Homicidal Maniac. Either way.
To be honest, I would be surprised if I was a descendent of racists. To be brutally honest, NO
ONE on my mothers, fathers, biological family's or friends side of my family likes the negroes
very much at all. They all hate Jinnel. I could never be an Afrophile. It's my non-related adoptive
brother Andrew who's the negrophile. Not me. So I disowned them. I think we all did.
----------Sunday, June 23rd, 2013,
From now on, I'm paying my bills the old fashioned way. By borrowing money from rich online
investors. Paying $500 - $690 for 2 software packages would be a breeze with a little extra
capital in the form of rich investors, which is a possible outcome, depending on how charitable
my friends are. I'll repay the money, and I'm pretty sure my client is a low key billionaire, so
what I'm requesting from him is not a lot compared to the world he knows. I'm pretty sure if he
agrees to a loan, he'll probably ask what's it for, and How much do you need. Typical Lender
protocol like that.
Monday, June 24th, 2013,

LSD / Speed
Cocaine
Marijuan
Cigarettes

P a g e | 783

I'm open to experimentation, quite frankly.

I had a dream that I was beginning work at a Japanese studio, and they wanted to "initiate me"
into their little club at Gainax with some cocaine. "We call this mista noh sleep" the Japanese
young man said introducing me a large pile of white powder in a bunch of square bags.
Y'know? I think I'll have some, I said, which was something that made them happy
"Yes!" one of the animators shouted in excitement.
-----------Tuesday, June 25th, 2013,
All right. I finally have a life. This morning I went skateboarding on my front driveway, which
makes a good ramp. But I fell off onto the street where cars drive by and got injured. The skin
on the bottom of my right arm ended up bloody, torn, ripped, black, and blue. The skin was torn,
bloodied, black, blue, and the bone almost got broken. I also pull muscles within the muscle
tissue. Now it's all bandaged up, and I got mummy arm. I look like Gara from Naruto with all
those bandages.
I'm also gonna be going out with Mrs. Hess to get a bite to eat. I realized she's one of the few
people who can get me out of this neighborhood, so I don't have to be cooped up in the house
everyday. I'm not going out with Mrs. Hess for any reason other than I need to get away from
Andrew. Those guys can literally drive me insane. I must prevent that. So I got resourceful, and
started emailing and cellphoning one of my remaining neighborhood friends, Jean Hess. And it
turns out she'd be more than happy to help me get out. They always remember my birthday. Her
and Chris, her son and my best friend. It's great. Life is getting better. Even if I got a bandaged
arm and hand.
I think I'll write about one of the things I was watching on a documentary channel. Military
Channel. I was watching a documentary on TV about the history of the secret was between two
secret, evil societies. The secret war between The Italian Mafia and The Ku Klux Klan. One of
the nastiest, most dramatic Secret Wars in History, just like Prohibition, J Edgar Hoover, and the
Red Scare. I like researching obscure wars and battles. Just getting to watch people sneak around
like sneaks only to be found out by the Police, Feds, CIA, or whoever, is always fun.
Wednesday, June 26th, 2013,
On average, my webcomic END TIMES, with the help of a little PR Marketing, gets on average,
over 1,600 views a month, and 50 views a day. I have a large audience. The average readership
number for an indie comic book in the 90s and early 2000s before online comics was around 23,000, copies read, on a good run. So I've been breaking even this entire time on WCN, and
they've been keeping that from me. I've been breaking even and I didn't even know it. Mostly

P a g e | 784

because nobody told me. Nobody tells me anything. No one told me Ashley Pierce my old
classmate moved to L.A. to pursue acting work. She's probably not even aware of all the stuff
I've done since she last heard of me. Well, I figured I'd follow her on Twitter, just for fun, just to
keep tabs on what one of my old acquaintances is doing now.

P a g e | 785

Chapter 19

P a g e | 786

Thursday, June 27th, 2013,

I don't have extraversion, charisma OR a tough skin. Therefore I'd make a good No. 2 to
someone else's No. 1. I make a good "Secondary Leader" I'm interested in attempting to attain a
Secondary Leadership Role, to the Thomas Romains, Jhonen Vasquezes, Katsuhiro Otomos,
Barack Obamas, Sean Akins, Steve Blums and Savs of the world.
---Celebrities I have left a good impression with:

CN, Titmouse, Pixar, JM Animation, Nicktoons, Will Street

Steve Blum, Danielle
Thomas Romain, Sav
[adult swim], Toonami, Nicktoons, The Internet
Anime, Manga, Webcomics, Film, Animation, Comics, Graphic Novels
Egypt, France, Japan, Canada
Cairo
Girls, Women, Friends, Lovers, Groupies, NOT my family
Chris Hess
Jean
Donna Frank
Phil Ferretti, Rima Jabbur,
Raynart, Nicole, Suicide Girls, porn models
Joe (People Who Share My First Name on TV)
Otomo
Spielberg, Amblin, LucasFilm, Dreamworks
YouTube, Twitter, Google

There's one thing I didn't know. In countries like France and Japan, social climbing and being a
proud careerist (going out of your way to network and make more money and success) is
considered a "bad" thing. Careerists puts a negative spin on being proactive with your career. In
France and Japan, they look down on that. That's why careerist has an "ist" at the end of it.
My power is still very real. More people seem to be on my side than previously. But I gotten
lighten up on my career. Just because you have a lot of power doesn't mean you'll have a long
friend list. You need a long line of online comments and a gallon of online popularity and
charisma to do that. I have no charisma. That is why I'm the Visionary Mastermind in real life. I
ain't winning no popularity contests anytime soon.

P a g e | 787

Saturday, June 29th, 2013,

By simply being a writer who writes down every one of his thoughts, and taking breaks from the
keyboard, channeling my literary abilities from past lives a loong time ago, and using everything
and everyone that happens to me as inspiration, research, and reference, by some miracle I never
get writers block.
Sunday, June 30th, 2013,
I emulate anime and manga, but I'm not trying to replicate it as a genre. I'm creating my own
genre. While yes, I do copy from my favorite anime-&-manga, I'm not trying to "do anime or
manga". I want to rival and match the quality, not duplicate or clone it. I like how Joe Mad,
Jhonen V., and Rob Schrab interpreted anime and manga. Their work doesn't look like anime or
manga, but they're clearly influenced by the dynamism of it.
When I ink the genga xeroxes, that's when I'm really in my element. I learn a ton by inking xerox
copies of genga cells with an endless supply of sharpie markers. Genga Xerox is the ultimate
way to teach yourself Spotting Blacks.
-----------My Franco-Japanese penpal Thomas Romain is doing poster designs for the new Shoji
Kawamori project, The Fool, an anime allegedly about Da Vinci as a mecha designer. That is
some Sweet Mecha Poster Art. Romain is even more impressive nowadays than he even used to
be, and even then he did very impressive work. I'm looking forward to seeing the finalized
animation. I don't know if it's going to be a film or series or OVA, but I know it's gonna be
badass.
Maybe there is something to these career choices of mine. Maybe I'm NOT as Foolish as I look.
Just MAYBE. Who knows! Anything's possible! Anybody can do anything of course. No, really!
I draw a combination of American seinen and revivalist gekiga ("drama pictures"). Just like
Japan-based Tezuka-apprentice Yoshihiro Tatsumi.
Thomas Romain got a copy of my script as a gift. He hasn't actually read my script yet, but at
some point he's going to, and I'm quite happy about that. I cannot WAIT to hear the man's
feedback! But I know how swamped he is with very important anime tasks and work, so I'm
going to have to be silent and patient for now until the timing is okay with him. Thomas Romain
did that poster art for the new Shoji Kawamori project.
I'm just amazed that the same artist who interpreted Savin Yeatman-Eiffell's classic Oban StarRacers' scripts might actually read my own script! Hurray! I get to follow in famous cinematic
footsteps. This could be an omen. But I'm not going to press my luck. My Dream is Still Alive.
Famous Anime Auteurs:

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Savin Yeatman-Eiffell
Thomas Romain
Shoji Kawamori
Shinichiro Watanabe
Rintaro
Otomo Katsuhiro
Yoshiyuki Sadamoto
Osamu Tezuka
Yoshihiro Tatsumi
Steve Blum
Eric P. Sherman
Tite Kubo
Musashi Kishimoto
Satoshi Tajiri
Akira Toriyama
Naoki Urasawa
John Lasseter
Sean Akins
Jason Demarco
Kim Manning
Wendee Lee
Johnny Young Bosch
Roy Pitts
Production I.G.
Stan Lee
Ocean Group
Chiara Zanni
Madhouse
Gonzo Digimation
Hiroaki Samura
Kristy Lijewski
LeSean Thomas
Toonami
Moebius
Kosuke Fujishima

My favorite things in comics:

Spotting Blacks and Notan

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Neo-Noir
Crime Stories
Action-Adventure
Drama
Emotion
Perspective and Architecture
Costume Design
Fighting, Violence, and Martial Arts Choreography

The only Westerner so far who's somehow managed to co-create their own anime and an artistic
and design level (not once, but twice or more) is Thomas Romain. And the only reason he
achieved that honor, besides working incredibly hard, being lucky and incredibly talented and
having a positive attitude, is because he had certain favorable conditions that allowed him to
achieve that accomplishment, was the fact that production was done partially in Japan the first
project, and entirely in Japan on the second project. Thomas is an animation chameleon. He can
handle himself and knows how to adapt. I've seen that firsthand. Sean Akins was also involved in
an anime (IGPX) that was also made in Japan, but Sean didn't do any actual design work, as I'm
pretty sure he's not an artist or designer, but a writer. The first real "Western Anime" in terms of
the production execution, was Thomas' co-production series, Oban, which had a very small
audience in America, but is authentic despite that. The "Made In Japan" ethos of Japanese
animation is not something I used to believe in, UNTIL I saw for myself how impressive that
style of production is. Thomas Romain is the most powerful Western Designer in anime
currently, just as Otomo, Todd McFarlane, Sav!, and Blum are all the most powerful in their
respective fields. We "Most Powerfuls" gotta stick together.
------I got an email from a job site. Got a job offer online today, as a benefits consultant over at Aflac
Insurance. Aflac Insurance is a Fortune 200 Company. They mentioned they liked my resume.
And even though the job requires the ability to drive, and I'll probably be unable to take them up
on their offer. I'm still happy they offered me a job to begin with. I hope more people like my
resume. That's the second Insurance Company job offer I've gotten in the last 2 to 3 months.
Because of e-retail, leaving your house to get out and do fun things is becoming unpopular:
Reasons to get out of the house:

Driving on Expressways
Traveling across the cities, country
Food and Beverage (7-11, Denny's, McDonalds, Burger king, Subway, Wendy's, Publix)
Salons
Hotels

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Tourist Destinations
Friends' House
Relative's House
Books-A-Million
Downtown City Metropolitan Areas (Orlando)
Movie Theatres
Comic Book Shops
Hooters
Superstores: Best Buy, Wal-Mart, Target
Bank
---------

Monday, July 1st, 2013,

Drawing lessons from Thomas Romain

Spend a lot of time on the drawing. Really hang out at your desk
Everything you need to know about drawing detailed art is on the surface.

Tuesday, July 2nd, 2013,

There are a fair amount of live streaming video sites. But only one of them is funded from the
outside. And only one of them was founded by a man who attended Stanford business and
computer science classes.
When starting a business, whether independently or state funded, whether a studio or
broadcaster, you need to know a few things before you get started:

How much money will starting your business take? (specifically)

How much money is your business expected to make? (specifically)

I finally decided to list my unpaid YouTube career on LinkedIn. At this point, I don't care if the
world knows I destroyed copyright as we know it, or that YouTube never fairly compensated me
in proportion to my influence. Those things are in the past. I'm more than happy to move on to
another line of work. I am the one with the valuable trade secrets after all, not them. They barely
even know what they're doing. At least I KNOW what I'm doing. They have all the money and
fame and power. I have all the insider knowledge no one else has.
I've kept my job at YouTube for the last 8 years on a daily basis

P a g e | 791

I used to think business plans had to be all typed up from the very beginning of their
construction. But that notion is wrong. Now, I keep a thick spiral notebook on my desk, typically
blue or black like most of my spiral planning notebooks, and on the title page, I write "Jay's
Business Plan" or "Jay's Invention". But it's a bad idea to write everything down by computer
and Microsoft Word, where it can get hacked into and spied on by certain people. Writing notes
and business plans and prototype notes by hand in a spiral notebook is the ultimate form of
secrecy and protection. No one goes rummaging through my handwritten notes.
When your business is generating some form of success, It is inevitable that competitors and
competition will come along and attempt to encroach on your territory by copying and
mimicking you and your business. They key is being aware of their tactics and in what ways they
attempt to eat into your profits. Not all will do so in a legal or fair manner, or play fair. Not when
profit is at stake. Chances are some of them will attempt to play dirty. And they will attempt to
cut their way into your bottom line by not only mimicking and copying you and your business,
but perhaps even attempting to sabotage you utilizing underhanded and manipulative, deceitful
means without you consent, permission, or foreknowledge. Some may try to gather information
on you using the internet and digital sabotage, or moles and spies.
------

I think I might retire from webcomics. They contain an awful lot of personal politics, just like
ASMB and DA. Not the kind of people you really want to contend with if you want to stay sane.
Besides. I guess I'm kind of a power player and pro now. I don't need the indies. I need hand
drawn comics, G+, Twitter, ActionToonsTV, Hacking DVDs with rips, YouTube, Blogging,
Online classes, Anime in Japan, Reading, French comics, DOS, Business, Espionage,
Ratting neighbors out, Adsense, and my TV scripts, and novels. Well, that and just resting on
my already lofty laurels of accomplishment. It's hard to believe it but myself and my work seem
to have found stake in a newer, larger, friendlier audience, with fewer life endangering crazy
makers and trolls like Andrew and Jinnel. All entirely new threats to my competition! So I'm
sure their fear of the new and evolving Obama-Directed landscape will keep them busy for a
while. Long enough to stay out of my way anyway. I'm evolving and transforming into a new
line of work. As the old timers say, out with the old, and in with the new.
Internet comics and animation/anime are kind of a dangerous, hazardous profession. Not able to
be pursued without a whole lot of dangerous public risk. The hypercompetitiveness of some of
these contenders will make your head spin. If you're on top of the world, chances are everyone's
going to know it, and when you're on the other end of the totem pole, the rock bottom, well,
people are going to notice all that too. As a matter of fact, a lot of them turn into assholes when it
comes to judging your or my faults. There's no evading the cross hairs when you're a public
figure. And many cheap shots get taken with those very same crosshairs, aimed anonymously, or

P a g e | 792

at least fired from a well lubricated cannon. Adult Swim has people in charge, but they don't like
to admit that. You can walk right up to them and ask "Who's responsible for this nonsense and
lunacy?" "Who do you answer to? Who's in charge here?" and they'll get so dodgy. With
something as ubiquitous and anonymous as Adult Swim and anime and Time Warner and CNN
and Viacom and TV and Toonami and Deviant Art, and YouTube, and Cartoon Network. Any
potential "friend, foe, or frenemy" ANY network or studio can be guilty of this actually, where it
functions like a well oiled machine while the higher ups feel safe in their anonymity to beam
messages "down from the heavens" and create quite a stir. Rest assured, someone is in charge.
And they're not as ethical, fair, generous, compassionate or responsible, as one might assume
someone with that amount of influence and power to be. Actually, some of them get away with
murder and are real life monsters. Obvious suspects are obvious, it's hardly ever a good thing if
a network or studio prides itself on having no figurehead. Some "old guy in a suit, to heap money
at.", or at least that's how fans react. That's what happens, when you let the inmates run the
asylum. People get hurt and cheated, big time, by powerful people who's career choice
encourages them not to have any real social accountability. No one's scrutinizing them. I'm paid
nothing, certainly not anywhere near their level, yet everyone throws shit at me when I TALK.
Secret Escape Plan:
Things One Can Do if The Day Comes When The Big Fat Man With the Sawed off Shotgun
picks the front lock to your house when everyone in your family is asleep but you and aims to
kill you with a shot gun:
1. Identify the Source. Find out by Observing the Sound of Banging in Your House, and
Maneuver, Stealthily Away From it.
2. Isolate yourself (the Target of the Assassination) from the Threat. The Serial KillerRapist bent on Revenge and Your Personal Annihilation.
3. Go into your bedroom and lock the door. Hope he doesn't blow the lock off the door with
a bullet. There will be Noise.
4. Pick up the Smartphone on your desk or bed, activate it, and dial 9-11. Identify your
name and address to police
5. Blockade the Door. Blockade Yourself Away Inside as The Murderer Awaits to Attempt
to Murder You In Cold Blood on the Other Side of the Door.
6. Wait For Police to Arrive and Save Your Life From Being Ended by 26 Rounds a Sawed
off Shotgun Prematurely.
7. Congratulations! You've Survived Terror Itself!
---------City Council Meeting!
City Council Meeting!

P a g e | 793

Starts Discussing the Latest Misadventures of Joseph Alberts' Life In the Next 10 Minutes!!!!
Only Parents, Business People, Local Reporters, and Local Politicians Allowed!!!! No One Else
Allowed in on this Meeting. Joseph Alberts Town Meeting!!!!
Y'know, Thank God! I think I finally got over my fascination with my own power and fame..
Now I'm pretty much just interested in hobbies, recreation, tinkering, and relaxing. Well, and
working and secondary leadership. Secondary Leadership suited to my ability to accumulate
talent and superstars.
My photo is now up. At Google and LinkedIn. That's one thing that's always in high demand.
Wednesday, July 10th, 2013,
I like having a secondary role to Action Cartoons, and anime. Those are one of the coolest things
in the world. Toonami [adult swim] and ActionToonTV go well together. Like peanut butter and
chocolate. Ones not as famous as the other, but they are both equally awesome. I like them both.
The public's knowledge of me is reaching a tipping point. Kind of shocking. I have a ton of new
friends now.
Man! I've been evading sickos, sociopaths, and sadists like a real PRO lately. I'm so awesome!
Thursday, July 11th, 2013
That's great!
Meanwhile on +
SplitAtomBoom has 450 friends
JM has 150
That's over 600 online friends on Google.
Split Atom Boom has half a million video views for his videos.

P a g e | 794

Friday, July 12th, 2013,

Well now! Now that I'm the most popular, INTERESTING man in the ENTIRE WORLD and
UNIVERSE, whatever will I do with all my free time!? OTHER THAN accept friend adds of
course.
Saturday, July 13th, 2013,
You know what? I think I just got Japan-ized. I'm more Japanese in my art style than ever before.
But I don't mind. I want the art to have a Japan-vibe about it, even when I'm not originally from
Japan. But I realized there doesn't seem to be any kind of rule against foreign manga-ka posting
on Japanese art sites such as Pixiv, so I decided to try it out. And now I'm a member and
occasional uploader. I've uploaded 3 pieces already, and much in the fashion of my own drawing
style, they get better as they progress and continue on.
I've got a long journey ahead of me. Japanese art is discomfort, because it takes the most
laborious work. But the final result (Japanese online manga) is worth it. It doesn't have to be
drawn by a Japan person, but it does have to have a Japan vibe about it and be published by a
Japanese publisher, whether online or off, whether mainstream or doujin. I'm doujin. I'm not
mainstream.
But now that I've had the time and experience to realize it, being an artist on a Japan manga site
such as Pixiv is an important thing. It takes courage to put your work on a site that is seen by a
lot of people in all kinds of different cities and towns in Japan.
That's not the same thing as being a Western Auteur who has a famous style. I aspired to be the
latter, but I actually seem to be turning into the former.
My artwork now has actual Japan cred. I have a small audience of readers and viewers in Japan,
through Google and Pixiv. I have more Japan acceptance than ever before. Just like if you visit
Japan on vacation, there's no escaping the culture, often if you go to Google and Pixiv, Japan
culture will surround you. It's incredible. It makes me want to reach the next level. I need to do
more artwork like LINK from Zelda. And if I spend a few hours or more on each drawing, I will
continue to improve.
It all started with Twitter and Thomas Romain, which started with Jhonen Vasquez and Todd
McFarlane
With Great J-cred comes Great Responsibility. There's a lot of power in such credibility, so it is
never to be abused, used to deceive, or wasted. I can only go as far as my best fans and friends
decide to let me go, speaking honestly. I've chosen one of the hardest paths in animation there is.

P a g e | 795

One copious amounts of competitors are infinitely more prepared and acclimated for. But I'm
still going to give 110%, even if I do become a manga star.
And then there's my YouTube show, Big O 2, which is returning to Toonami at the end of the
month finally. That was even less expected. Both Toonami and Japan and numerous anime and
manga creators seem to have developed a certain kind of trust in their relationship with me, and
it fills me with honor and excitement. But I know better than to talk too much all the time, as I
did at one point.
Pixiv is my first real footprint in the J-cred market. It's no small feet, but I learned as long as you
don't talk to much, and hold yourself up to the same standard your Japan peers hold themselves
to by practicing doujinshi, I have a feeling I'll be on the right track. But to "succeed" in Japan
(but really, isn't just having a SMALL presence there succeeding in one sense?), it's important to
honor your relationships. Know who your friends are, and know who your rivals and competition
is, whether it's in the West or anywhere else.
But I'm achieving my dream. My dream is actually really being achieved in real life, in very,
very small steps. So I need to focus on maintaining my focus, concentrating only on myself and
my job. I'm going to play Master Builder in His Prime. I'm building an entirely new form of
filmmaking, television production, and literature. Cartooning is the beginning of it all.
I just discovered comic.pixiv.net today. A Japan-based online comics site.
Sunday, July 14th, 2013,
I've got a few things on my to-do list
Pick up a pencil and sketch-draw some more fanart or stuff I'm looking at.
Favorite Famous Manga-ka:

Moebius
Thomas Romain
Shoji Kawamori
Katsuhiro Otomo
Yasuhiro Nightow
Hiroaki Samura
Yoshiyuki Sadamoto
Kazuki Takahashi
Hiroyuki Imaishi

It's always nice to have my little safety net of emotional support. My little support team there to
cheer me up, especially when things get bad and badder. They simply pick me up and dust me
off when I really need it. It's a bit of an adjustment (being popular online), and it makes privacy

P a g e | 796

issues even more baffling. But overall, I give my online friends and international support team
10 stars out of 10 stars. Even if some of them are a little out there, they're mostly all pretty
helpful. I have some of my rivals outnumbered. Not all of them though.
Despite all this amazing change and teamwork, I still hold many of the same goals I used to: Be
an amazing artist, update my online profiles, keep making and showcasing videos, drawing
comics and cartoons.
If people got their hands on Mono and Parallax and End Times, it would definitely be by using
overwhelming force, by being pushy and badgering me into it. Seeing as I wouldn't just hand
something that precious to me over to anything owned by Funimation or Time Warner or
Viacom. The only people who would attempt to license my idea would be corporate and
"entrepreneurial" thieves, bullies, and vandals being push and using overwhelming force. I'm not
going to hand an idea as precious to me as mine over to just anybody. It is my idea, and I plan on
relishing this fact. For the rest of my life if possible. You get your filthy American hands OFF
my brainchild.
Monday, July 15th, 2013,
For digital animation studios used to by many pros, In the U.S. / Canada, animation studios
typically use Flash and Toon Boom to animate more traditional and stylized projects. One of the
best kept secrets in animation is what kind of software many Japanese anime studios use to
animate and complete anime production in Japan. One of the non-photoshop programs that's
most popular in Japan, and is starting to catch on in the U.S. with pioneers such as myself (as
I've recently discovered online by doing some research) is RETAS PRO. The really, REALLY
amazing thing about RETAS PRO is that it was specifically designed and programmed in Japan
originally for anime studio production. In Japan, 2-D Animation is an illusion. The Japanese and
nearly all (if not all) modern day 2-D anime studios use software to animate, and compose shots,
not just to do effects animation and 3-D projects. That sort of started with Production I.G., or at
the very least they were a major pioneer. RETAS PRO is not just good for digital production. It's
tailor made to create a sense of anime-specific texture, shading, multiplaning, lighting, light
refraction, blurring, editing, and timing. If you want to produce animation in the United States
that has the look and feel of authentic anime production and style, RETAS PRO is the go-toprogram. The real miracle about RETAS PRO is how formatted to anime industry standards its
production style is. I foresee an increase in popularity of digital 2-D programs like that one. If
you know what you're doing on RETAS PRO, and draw in an anime production style, there
really isn't any kind of limit to what one can do with that powerful of an animation software. I'm
going to read up on some tutorials, seeing as there are no books published on how to use that
software in America yet. I'm one of the first foreigners to get to try it out apparently. So yet again
I'm one of the first people in America or anywhere to try a certain anime-manga animation
production technique. This is gonna be fun.

P a g e | 797

I don't live in Japan. End Times was drawn in Central Florida, a Funimation-Toonami fashion of
anime things being produced in the American South. But my anime is made on Japanese
animation software: RETAS PRO, and I publish my art online on a site published in Japan:
Pixiv, and a large percentage of my video audience, of half a million, is in Japan. So I have my
fair share of Japanese credibility.
It doesn't always take money to produce a 1-man demo reel. You can live a back alley dumpster
while working an incredibly unglamorous day job, and still crank out a killer reel. Resources
don't matter. What does matter is knowledge and skill and hard work. It's not that hard to teach
yourself to animate and draw key frames, cells, and layouts if you have the energy to manage it.
I'm sure someone's tried to be a Bill Plympton of anime demo reels before. Software makes it so
you don't need brick and mortar traditional animator buildings: Just Wacom Tablets and
Animator Studio Software. Both of which aren't really all that expensive in terms of budget.
Generally speaking, you're not going to be able to FIND a healthy team of artists to work
together to bring a unifying vision together online. That's what everyone wants, but that isn't
really how it is. Initially, animation is like comics. As an cartoonist turned animator, you have to
initially do all the grunt work yourself, digitally, on computer to produce an animatic, demo reel,
short film, or pilot. As a solo artist, you are responsible for your final draft, vision, and end
product. NOT someone else. In animation, everything IS on the surface. To master the illusion,
you have to master the surface.
And Now, a Moment of Literature:
America and Germany were not always equal opportunity and the lands of freedom and liberty
we know them (mostly America) as today. Both have historic guilt to contend with.
With Europe, it was the Nazi Party, which has been "erased and obliterated" From European
History Texts.
With America, it was Slavery and the KKK, and later, it's deformed cousin, segregation.
These are all rather ugly reminders of a past that was once very real, and a very real historic
threat to progress. But the truth is, for the most part, America never truly shouldered the burden
of Europe's problems, and Europe never really shouldered the burden of America's problems.
Each continents own brand of indignity and historical contradiction does not belong to the other
one. It is not a shared hatred or racism. The flames of racism burn brightest in their native
homelands, and to be truly extinguished, they need to be extinguished in their native homelands.
Sure everywhere else isn't perfect, but there's few things as obviously out of sync with humanity
than racism and bigotry.

P a g e | 798

Joseph sat timidly with his new friend he had made, his first new high school friend ever, and his
first black friend ever) in the principle's office at Lyman High. Standing over Joseph and his
black friend menacingly was a police officer with his arms pressed together, sunglasses
protecting his eyes in doors, holding up his holster belt.
"You know, boys" the police officer lectured smugly. "Theft is a serious felony, at this school, in
this state or anywhere really"
"Yeah, but you do know it's just a roll of duct tape right?" said Joseph
The boy who sat across from Joseph, this humorous, likeable new friend he made, and Joseph
himself were being profiled by the Principle and a Lyman high school police officer, and they
didn't even know it yet.
"But hold on a second..." I said. "All we were doing was playing with duct tape that someone left
on the set building of the school play. Why are we getting into all this trouble just because you
startled us by yelling at us. Anyone would run if you saw an armed officer yelling at you for
something you weren't aware of. The only reason we ran WITH the duct tape was because you
teriffied us. Look at my friend! He's mortified!" I said about my new friend who was broken
down into tears by now. "Why us?"
"Because you STOLE SOMETHING, the police officer said."
"Oh really," I negotiated. And this has NOTHING TO DO with the fact that one of us is
BLACK, eh?"
And that's why I ended up not attending Lyman. Much Longer.
Tuesday, July 16th, 2013,
American Newscaster Talking Head: Yeah? Well, anyone who has a passport...is GAY!
Jay: Yeah. I think I can live with that.
Teenage "valley girls" have GOT TO Be the dumbest, most un-spiritual culture on the PLANET.
I have lived in relative solitude for the last 10 years. It's not as uncomfortable as jail or a psych
ward. I wouldn't be surprised if this went on for another 10 to 30 years. My parents are just
waiting to get old and die and leave me on my own. Pretty much. Not the best strategy on their
part.
A lot can change in a decade. If I went out in to the world, it would not be the same world I once
knew. I'm probably better off being a mystical ingenious visionary recluse.
Mirrors kill clowns and clones. And clone-clowns! Nothing is more effective at killing a
deranged clown on TV than reflecting the ugliness of his own words, face, and bad hair and glass

P a g e | 799

right back at him, reminding him of how stupid and silly he really looks. He'll be distracted by
himself and his own self-hatred. Too much to do any real damage to you.
The best way to handle disgruntled fans, clowns, clones, doppelgangers, and evil news and
internet avatar twins (especially when they're your cousin) is to redirect their negative energy by
making them look at themselves in a mirror, by holding it up to their face. No evil twin can
resist feeling insecure before the most lethal of clone killing devices: The Mirror.
You may shut your mind off some times, in hopes of escaping your goals and destiny and career
that are in reality inescapable. But you can NEVER shut the Lord-God off. Lord-God will
always bestow you with enough power to fuel your energy. As much as it takes to get the job
done. As much energy as each task requires. But for starters you need to be specific about what
tasks and goals you're setting for yourself. It's not good enough just to want to work. You need to
specific what you're going to do and get done.
I guess EVERYONE wants MY attention. Now don't they? Everyone wants to use my laser-like
focus for something. Depend on the person, it can be for crime or to save the world.
Unless something is given to you, purchased by you, or invented or created BY YOU...it is
simply not your spoils to take. Simple as that. Don't take what isn't yours. And unless you have
the good luck and fortune of inheriting or receiving any or a lot of money, money is not your
problem. Nor is it your privilege or responsibility. You simply do not own it. Period. End of
story. Now let's move onto talking about things I can control.
Logic of acceptance is quite simple, as I see it. If the people your selling to refuse, there is no
sale. If it's not meant to be....it's not meant to be. That goes for having your own show. If it's not
meant to be, you'll know it...Eventually, sooner or later. If something is not meant to be, it is not
meant to be. None of this "never give up" crap. At some point, you need to give up and move on
to something that works, and stop being pushy and pressing issues for things that will never be
completed, projects that will never be completed, nonetheless happen.
For me, selling a show is out. Animating a short film, and animating digitally on software like
RETAS to create filmmaking with illustrations, is in.
I no longer aspire to be an idea man. That artform is dead. Now I kind of just want to assemble
as many systems, contraptions, mechanisms, and production lines as I can.
Wednesday, July 17th, 2013,
I had the BEST dream this morning. I was out in public, going for a walk downtown in a park,
when from the bushes, Bryan Johnston jumped out from the bushes like a cartoon villain, when
some little kid suddenly appeared near him, an 8 year old boy, runs up to him and kicks him in
the balls really hard, then he falls down and collapses. "LEAVE HIM ALONE YOU STALKER

P a g e | 800

MOTHERFUCKER!!!" The kid screams at him, as Bryan now lays on the ground holding his
nuts in pain. End Dream.
I downloaded a bunch of different art, drawings, and painting software to my new computer. I
realized something. When I make a real effort to paint something, especially on the ArtRage
software, I'm actually pretty good at digital painting. I repainted my clouds landscape from
scratch, no reference. Turned out pretty perfect.
Saturday, July 20th, 2013,
Why does anime suck now. But yeah, anime SUCKS. I'm sick of that shit being the only shit
kids care about now. It's not worth all the advertising and hype it's printed on. I'm about ready to
move on with my life. I'm actually starting to really, really hate anime a little. There's got to be
better addictions out there. Something better to do with all your free time. Man! Fuck anime. I'm
sick of all that teenage bullshit. I fucking hate teenagers. And if teenagers like anime, I KNOW
I'm gonna definitely hate it. Teenagers have no taste. In anything. Anime brainwashes people
into liking it with anti-American subliminal messages. Not worth it. So not worth it.
That's weird. I always thought if people were magnetically attracted to you as they are to me, that
would end up resulting in profit somehow, customers and all that. Paying customers being drawn
to a business.
I don't really have a problem (at all really) dying an unmarried virgin with no children or loved
ones. That's just how life is. I'm destined to die alone, but who cares. I don't care. And if it
doesn't bother me I don't know why it would anyone else. I've got a good 25 or so years left,
maybe a bit less. Heart attacks don't hurt that much, do they. My death would probably be
mocked and belittled by others online. I'm not afraid of that sort of thing. People will talk. That's
part of life. It's not really my concern what other people think. Death doesn't intimidate me.
When you're a warrior you can't really afford to be afraid of the end of life. I'm getting too old to
believe better days or a better life lies ahead. For some reason I'm no more depressed about this
than anything else. I think in the end I just didn't have the stuff it takes.
I'm not afraid or worried about things not working out for the better, because I know they won't
work out for the better. That's just how life is. Happy Endings don't happen in real life. That's the
realm of movies and novels.
Social Worker:
Do you have a living will or next of kin?
Me:
No on BOTH counts...

P a g e | 801

Sunday, July 21st, 2013,

That's the problem with women online. They write flirtatious messages to you all day long, but
whenever you write them a direct message, they never email or text you back. Ah well. I knew it
was too good to be true online. They're probably just intimidated by my...manliness.
Women online are unreliable. I'm better off just sticking with friends. Friends with eventual
benefits. Maybe. I don't know. I'm terrible at this flirtation and making out kind of thing. I mean
I LIKE making out, but I am a bit rusty with females.
One of the founding fathers of the Japanese anime industry, upon realizing my Chinese heritage,
almost seemed like he described me as "so forward thinking and motivated" and believed
"Young Japanese used to be like" me. If he was talking about me, that would be quite the honor.
Considering it's Miyazaki.
Much like my great grand ancestor, William The Conqueror, I too have a gut and am very hairy.
I too am establishing a great dynasty and power of a Kingdom, a Media Empire in some ways.
I too am consolidating my own empire of power with the continents, nations, ethnicities,
cultures, and art forms of other civilization.
My ancestor William quite literally built help lead and build and create the ancient Monarch of
England, United European Superpowers and Cultures, and quite literally did his part to put the
Great in Great Britain.
If he could do all that, I think I can handle a little comic book project! How hard could it be?
My life and career are a powerful duo of Masterworks. End Times is a Masterpiece of
Mythology and Archetype. Parallax the script is a Masterwork of Animation and Anime
Screenwriting. My life is a Masterpiece of risk and adventure.
Monday, July 22nd, 2013,
Nobody else on + has the kind of famous blood I do. Nobody else on + has a their own online
TV streaming action cartoon programming block to promote the way I do. Nobody's even doing
the same thing I do. All everyone else wants to do is post doujin and socialize with other people
on +. I got an extra + and Tweet account in hopes of promoting my online channel, but due to
delays in production and lacking funds, I've had to wait, and I got more friends on my social
media accounts than I really ever expected. I'm still figuring out how good + is with marketing.
On + I already have a pretty big audience of friends. I have my friends quota filled, but the real
question is, will they be interested in visiting the video site I'm building?

P a g e | 802

I don't have an audience.....(He looked around)

Okay. I have an audience. A very large audience. But my audience lacks focus or motivation to
actually DO anything. That's the thing about audiences. They rely on ME for their focus, and
don't seem to have much natural focus or motivation themselves.
Tuesday, July 23rd, 2013,
Cary blames me for the virus infestation. He thinks I'm the reason our entire network is infected
with Trojans. And he's freaking out violently too. I finally got him to see what I've known all
along, and he couldn't handle the truth, that there's nowhere safe or private on any of our
computers. I didn't cause this. Viruses disguise themselves as "normal programs" to evade
detection. They avoid informing you that you are infected with anything, let alone 200,000
trojans and adware. "You will not be using ANY computer until all these viruses are GONE!!!"
And technically, my parents have kidnapped me numerous times, on numerous occasions. Like
when they abducted me from my apartment where I attended at the Art Institute of Ft.
Lauderdale. They abduct me from my home every time I end up in a psych ward. They abduct
me a LOT actually!
I'm no longer writing a comic book. I'm writing a screenplay as thick as a novel for an action
movie.
I'm taking on more and more of a Regal, Military Demeanor. I'm definitely losing my sense of
humor. Maybe even my ability to laugh. My hard life seems to be hardening me. If it's a
humorous TV show, for the most part I don't want to watch those clowns. Smiling is getting
harder to do. I'm getting older, more mature, more serious minded. Less lighthearted and
comedic. I'm still compassionate, just not humorously so. I've had time to realize I'm not living
in a neighborhood anymore. I'm living in a warzone. Suburbia in Seminole County feels like a
warzone around this house, where there is no one to trust, and everyone, even the figures in the
news and TV, is out to get you and make sure you die. Or at least lose all your enthusiasm and
energy and feel the fatiguing nature of other people's cynicism.
Honor and Chivalry are important.
Wednesday, July 24th, 2013,
Story and drawing are an art, not a science. But if they are in fact a science, they are an imprecise
science at best, as their outcomes can not entirely be foreseen, calculated, or predicted. Science
can be made with ingredients, pieces, and formulas. In science if you combine Chemical A with
Chemical B, you'll get Chemicals C and D. If you combine Writing Ingredient A with Writing
Ingredient B, there is no specific outcome that can be relied on. You may get life, you may get
metal, and you may get silver and gold. It's alchemy at best. It's a mystical transmutation that can
only be created by doing the work and diving in to begin with. No book will ever be able to fully

P a g e | 803

teach this. You'll never completely master art and writing. You could spend 5 lifetimes of
nonstop study and you still wouldn't have it down to an exact science or learn everything there is
to know.
Everyone knows literature is boring, analytical, and complex more often than not, but it's a
different story with comics and animation. Comics and animation are often a lot more complex
than they look on the surface. A lot of strategy and technique goes into animation's construction
and execution.
You can't bet against computers. Computers almost always win, due to their infinitely superior
non-human strategic abilities. Same with Asians on computers. They always win too, but not
completely. Computers don't win at having a soul or having a human touch. Human emotions
will never be able to be completely simulated and replicated by computers, except artificially,
which is another way of saying "of an inferior quality". Human touch trumps cybernetic touch
any day of the week, year, or decade. Unless we're talking about traditional strength and labor.
Independent comics is a 1 author operation. Animation and anime are never that, hardly ever. In
animation you are forced by osmosis to be a team player. It sucks.
List!
Websites that update without notifying me by email
YouTube
ASMB
LinkedIn
Twitter
Pixiv
Gmail
Google+
----------Thursday, July 25th, 2013,
At one point, I was admired for being a "visionary". But it's like my vision has just vanished. It's
weird. All the ignorance surrounding me is really eating into my creativity and creative time
alone. Does Twitter make us less creative? Does the internet? I don't know.

P a g e | 804

Traits of a Winner

Willpower
Patience
Fortitude
Bravery
Discipline
Consistency
Stoicism
Honesty
Nobility
Energy
Strength
Focus
Concentration
Promptness
Authenticity

Willpower: Willpower is very important to me. Someone once told me, "You're a genius at
whatever you set your mind to.". Which is true. But there is a more concise way of putting it. "I
Complete whatever I set my mind to. I Finish and Work On and Stop getting Blocked at
Whatever I Set My Mind To. Setting my mind to something is important. Setting my mind to
something, almost everything creates power within that thing.
There is a reason I admire my best friends so much, a reason I'll never forget them, and a reason
we'll never forget eachother: Chris Hess, Phil Ferretti, Jonathan Bartlett, Amanda Martin, Nicole
Cook. We're all old as gold, and they all hold a sacred fondness for me, and I a sacred fondness
for them. There's a true friendship and bond between us that is very profound. Though our lives
have had their share of ups and downs, our relationships between them and me are some of the
healthiest relationships one will ever find in any social chemistry. They never betray me and I
never betray them. They don't lie to me or about me and I don't like to or about them. We're loyal
to eachother. We've known one another long enough the media has never really influenced our
opinions and views of one another. We don't ever let the media or internet rumor and gossip mill
influence how well I treat them or how well they treat me. The Media has TRIED to influence
their views of me, but it never succeeded. I'm still the same person to these people I've always
been. They're the same people to me they've always been. We've all changed and moved on, but
we still have fond memories of and respect for each other.

P a g e | 805

P a g e | 806

Chapter 20

P a g e | 807

Friday, July 26th, 2013,

Now some of you may be asking, what IS "indie anime". Well, that's easy. It's short for
independent manga and anime. Solo projects done mostly by one person. It's kind of an upgrade
from American and world anime. It also combines elements of indie comics with Japanese
alternative manga. Draw something weird, creative, imaginative, and funky. Not just something
pretty. It's anime not drawn for trends, popularity, fame, or profit, but instead for the pure joy of
self-expression, individuality, and telling good strories. It's not meant to be accepted or liked in
Japan, and it transcends being one big huge PR Advertisement FOR Japan or Tokyo. It's related
to the style, not the geography or nationality, or citizenship.
Space Pirate Captain Hurlock. Probably one of the most emotionally driven anime series ever
created. I'm going to have to go back and track down some of the anime for Hurlock. It's very in
step with my own dramatic style. One that is fine with displaying emotions on the page and
screen. I'm not emotional on the surface myself, but my scripts and comics often do bring
emotional resonance to the page. I don't mind if someone feels sad or depressed in my stories,
and as a writer, I'll always have an empathic view and perspective of emotions. I want my
audience to feel what the characters are feeling. Not all intensity is violent. Sometimes it can be
intense sadness. But the story needs to reflect that sadness if it's going to be there. It needs to be
justified by the story. If it isn't it's probably just more comedic parody. And do we really need or
want more comedy?
Good drama needs emotion, trauma, sadness, tragedy, and loss, or at
least half of these things. Tragic-Heroes make many of the best
heroes. From Batman to Captain Hurlock. Drama often isn't justified or
memorable without a sense of sadness. Just as scenes need a subtext,
and scripts need back story and an inciting incident, real drama often
contains tragedy and sadness. Some supreme misfortune for the
protagonist or main characters, and in some instances, the entire
cast, like in the story of The Bible. Story needs an emotional subtext
and visual or thematic context to be placed within. Otherwise there's
often no real motivation or justification for the events and no reason
for the audience to even care. This is what I know about story and
penning fiction. True screenwriting, especially in Eurasia, is just as
much about emotional context as it is about narrative and plot. That's
definitely something I missed before. I had the fighting down. No one
could beat me at cinematic action in my particular style. It was the
genuine emotional elements I wasn't including as I didn't know any
better at the time. Writing teachers often don't talk about the
emotions in a story.

P a g e | 808
It's perfectly okay to attempt to write a story with the action of
Hiroaki Samura and Yu Yu Hakusho, the emotion of Savin Yeatman-Eiffell
and Leiji Matsumoto, the militant nature of Yoshiyuki Tomino and Tom
Clancy, the brooding nature of Bruce Timm, Frank Miller, and Yasuhiro
Nightow, and the raw power of Todd McFarlane and Katsuhiro Otomo. It's
not as hard of an effect to achieve if you stick exclusively to words,
writing, and description.

The Magic Wand feature in Photoshop is awfully useful. It's great for making full compostions. I
highlight certain drawings then place them over other certain drawings.
One of the biggest challenges and confusions facing modern animators today is deciding and
figuring out, which parts of my work (as an animator and cartoonist) will be drawn or painted by
hand, and which parts will be created digitally by computer software. Will the backgrounds be
hand painted, or will they be painted with Photoshop and ArtRage? Will the props, be it guns or
mecha and weapons, be drawn by hand in the initial animation, or will they be drawn with a
Wacom tablet? Will each cell be animated at a drawing desk with pencils and pens, or will it be
animated (or perhaps just revised) on a PC? There's never just one way to do something, in terms
of animation and comics.
Current Influences of the Moment:

Leiji Matsumoto
Thomas Romain
Satelight
Savin Yeatman-Eiffell
Blacksad

So, what is the plan?

The plan is to impress a studio or publisher, in the long run, with a one shot ()
or animation reel, or script or pilot.
I will achieve this goal by drawing every day if possible. As long as I don't get rusty.
I will write more scripts than journals. I will break the journal habit and reverse my
workflow.
I will work on drawing a comic book page. NOTHING MORE until I can handle 1 easy
page
I will mess around in Photoshop

P a g e | 809

Schedule
Weekly quota:

1 Comics Page
1 Script Page
5 pgs. of Sketches
-------Finished Products (Potential to be Sold):

4 Nonfiction Books
2-4 Comics One Shots (scrapped)
Graphic Novel (scrapped)
1 First Draft Pilot Script (First Draft) [Being reviewed by Thomas Romain]
Art Book(s)
Production Design Book
Feature Film (Anime Megamix)
2 Online Channels (SplitAtomBoom, ActionToonTV)

Products in Production:

Lots More Comics

Lots More Scripts
Novel(s)
Demo Reel

Fortunately, I'm getting better at the "Finished Product and Having Something Tangible in Hand
to Show" Thing. My work is tightening up. It's getting stronger.
I'm going to have to learn to collaborate with Exec Producers, Editors, Agents/Studios for my
scripts.
And collaborate with Editors in Chief on my Comics. Their opinions matter to me. I respect my
bosses. They have too much experience in the industry not to make some sense.
If Dan Vado thinks I'd fit in at SLG, which he may, then I'll give it a second thought. I never
really knew how well I might fit in at Vado's publisher, and I did aspire to that for a long time
when I was a teenager. That was my entire goal as a teenager: Get published by SLG. My
patience has proven to help me in such a situation. Apparently waiting and training in private for
a decade made me more prepared. SLG and My Comics might make a great combination. They

P a g e | 810

publish artists I really admire and look up to: Ted Naifeh, Jhonen Vasquez, Serena Valentino,
FSc, Evan Dorkin, Chandra Free, Rikki Simmons, Faith Erin Hicks, Kristy Lijewski, Roman
Dirge. I've always known SLG is one of those publishers that can really make your career if you
get on well with them, but I've got to practice patience. I can't say for certain I'd fit in on a social
level, but if Dan Vado is showing some form of approval as he has on LinkedIn, I'm sure it must
mean something.
-------Saturday, July 27, 2013,
I'm achieving Greatness. I believe in Greatness, that each of us can become Greatness, as Great
as we want, through Willpower and Hard Work. I'm one of the World's Greatest. One of the
World's 100 Greatest People. One of the World's 100 Most Influential People. Stuff like that. As
a Genius, I never expected to achieve any less.

I'm becoming a Great Cartoonist.

And a Great Animator and Producer
And a Great Screenwriter
And a Great Novelist, Filmmaker, and Storyteller
And a Great Inventor and Engineer and Designer

There's no denying I'll amount to something very valued, significant, and important some odd
years from now.
Wikipedia Browsing History (Article Worthy):

Jhonen Vasquez
Seth MacFarlane
Yoshiyuki Tomino
Quentin Tarantino
Meg White
H.P. Lovecraft
Weird Fiction
Fantastique
Mario Puzo
All You Need is Kill
Brave Story
A Drifting Life
Trinity Blood
Hiroyuki Imaishi
Leiji Matsumoto

P a g e | 811

Military Science Fiction

Military fiction

The amazing thing about Dan Vado, is after everything that's drifting out there about me. After
all the offensive things passed out out there about me, he still seems to be interested in keeping it
business related. He still sees me the way an editor should see a great indie artist. Even after all
the mean and disgusting gossip and controversy, people I admire still believe in me. There's still
hope, which is exactly what I hoped would happen. I'm still welcome to draw and write.
Unfortunately, the path I walk is one littered with the skeletons and corpses of those who went
before me, and failed. The Temple of Doom. It is not a safe path by any means. But the other
side holds glory, depending on how hard I work. It is not an easy path by any means. Nothing
about this kind of success is easy or lazy.
Oh, hello person who took my job.
One comic book I really want to check out is Frank Miller's series, Ronin, which was published
in 1983 by Frank Miller.
Like most artists, I borrow a lot from Frank Miller and Bruce Timm. I never really got into Mike
Mignola.
Books to Re-Discover

Spawn
Sin City
Hellboy
Captain Harlock
Leiji Matsumoto
Priest
Trigun
Jackal
Yu-Gi-Oh!
Gundam
Claymore
Nabari No Oh
------------------------

P a g e | 812

Man cannot live on self-hype alone. Sometimes, you have to LET others write and talk about
you. In a conventional way. Finally someone writes an article about me using my real legal
name. FINALLY!
After losing some purpose and direction in my career, my focus shifted a little. Zen definitely
seems to be making a comeback. Just meditating whenever and wherever I am. Zen exercises
and whatnot. I can't appreciate things like anime and comics as much WITHOUT Zen.

Wednesday, July 31st, 2013,

From here on out, I'm awaiting review and response from 2 main people to review my work and
questions: Ramin Zahed and Thomas Romain.
I really feel as though this is a Passing The Torch moment. When the higher ups and powers that
be are coming together, and deciding who will be the one to receive the powers passed down to a
new generation. I strongly believe I shall become one of those people in time. The bad times
were a test to see how I dealt with managing an empire under pressure. I succeeded. And now the
status quo has more faith in me than ever. Many artists, writers, businesses, creators, auteurs,
filmmakers, and authors see me as the one to inherit all of this current and future power. It's a
huge honor. More huge than anyone around me realizes.
I seem to be on my way to being granted the potent power of becoming some form of authority
figure in the near or distant future. It could be 2 months from now. It could be 2 years from now.
It could be when I find a gig. It could be when I start making money.
I've decided I want to be an international animation and comics pop culture journalist, where I
start off re-pasting the articles of other websites to my blog, and eventually shifting into an
opinionated columnist mode. I'm already a lot like an international comics and animation
journalist or internet writer. Over the next few years, I'll slip some of my own writings and
opinions into there, the same way I snuck ads into my YouTube videos I published. I'm a good
journalists NOW. NOT EVEN in the future. I already broke 1 story about Katsuhiro Otomo to
Animag a year or so back.
YouTube turned all my dreams of ubiquitous power and influence into real ubiquitous power and
influence. Albeit not in the field I was hoping for. Still counts though. Now, I rule the world.
Being the Overlord Ruler of the International World is Amazing! I'm so freaking powerful! I
have the power in theory. Not literally. There's a difference.

P a g e | 813

Thursday, August 1st, 2013,

I definitely have a good sense of fashion. A superior sense of fashion, actually. I'm actually very
fashion conscious and fashion savvy in reality. So much so that I might actually become a small
time fashion designer in real life. I want to buy more anime and comics shirts, more badass
trenchcoats, and I want to start designing my OWN tee shirts. I still love black tee shirts, but I
want to start wearing my own designs. I inherited the superior fashion genes from my birth
mother. She was a designer too. I've never seen any of her fine art or fashion design, but I'm sure
they're good if my work is any indicator. I want to put Mono trenchcoat stripes and ribbons and
criss-crossing quasi-octagonal white lines on a black fabric. I want to make tee shirts that
accentuate my superior sense of black and white art. I won't be "unleashing a fall line", but I will
be designing many of my own shirts in the future. Odd geometric cutout shapes and half formed
geometric patterns are hypnotic to me. They've got a lot of design appeal.
Friday, August 2nd, 2013,
Has the U.S. always been this blasphemous and disrespectful towards religion and the sacred?
Not respecting the sacred isn't a crime, and unfortunately it hasn't helped things.
Jesus. Mom injures herself and gets old, and suddenly she treats me like the parent of a
teenager...and she's the teenager!
I might be vacationing up North, somewhere in one of the Northern parts of the Southeast. I
think vacationing and travel would be good for me. I have one person on my side so that's all I
care about.
Saturday, August 3rd, 2013,
I'm beginning to suspect terrorist might not like me very much. They started targeting planes that
are flying into my home state. Scary shit bro. But then again, I'm not all that different than
Obama. Like pretty much all comic book artists I hate terrorists. But I never thought they'd even
pay attention to my stories. The last thing I want to end up with is a Salmon Rushdie type of
situation where my life is endangered. Fortunately it hasn't gotten that crazy. But I do have to
watch my step. These things may or may not happen when you make terrorist the main
antagonists of a High Fantasy Manga work. Japan hasn't addressed terrorism or Theology much.
That might change in time, but right now I'm the black sheep of the manga family.
Speaking of comics and webcomics. I got mine listed on Wikipedia tonight. Finally gave into the
urge.
I REALLY don't like hearing myself talk about "potential" money in a from-the-past context. I
WENT BROKE! I'm BANKRUPT! READING my past writings about money and "getting rich"
is too depressing and fatiguing. Because I didn't realize how wrong I was. I had no clue how
much they'd rip me off and cheat me out of my money, and illegally/unfairly so too.

P a g e | 814

I borrow from tons of different sources of inspiration and general sources that influence and
inspire me and my work, and I take their different elements and features I like and enjoy about
each of them, and stir them up in a pot, like an alchemic mixture, which ends up resulting in the
end result, which would be my ultimate end product. My style. I have a very unique, very
original, and innovative style. But eventually, I'm going to have to figure out what exactly it is
that separates and differentiates me from my heroes and influences on my work. Why am I not
just another carbon copy of Frank Miller, Jhonen Vasquez, Tim Burton, or Bruce Timm? What
makes me stand out? What gives me my own style, voice, creative DNA fingerprint, and
identity. Am I more of something than a certain artist or writer? Am I less of something than a
certain artists or writer?
"In 10,000 words or less. a/s/l?" - Loki
Yep, I'm just that epic. Sometimes it DOES take me 10,000 words to say my name. Or talk about
my day, or narrate a story. I'm a natural Dave Sim clone. Well, sort of.
"definition of tl;dr" - anonymous
Monday, August 5th, 2013,
I've done over 47 pages of serious fiction (script, short prose) so far.
To me, when I'm writing fiction, I like to put in so much atmosphere, I actually tend to give life
and different genre and time period elements to different locations in my world:

The Wasteland
Shadow Operative 7 Headquarters
Shadow Op 7 Office Complex
The Suburbs
The Forest of Death
Mount Sun
Death Valley
Route 55
Jinn's Apartment
The Floating Castle
The Heavens Kingdom
Loser Bar
Car Shop
Druidon Theatre
Black City
Black City Apartments
Edo

P a g e | 815

Sword Shop
Pawn Shop
Chronis
Metro-Chronis
------

I started off online in broadcasting and business as an online TV pirate, broadcasting digital
videos from DVDs I ripped as footage for my online programming block, which is pretty much
how you have to start out when you're working with little to no payment or budget. Ted Turner
Started CN with the merging Hannah Barbera and Warner Brothers broadcast library of licensed
shows. I started ActionToonTV (my career in broadcasting) with my ripped DVD collection and
some broadcasting websites and software on my 2 computers the same way I launched
SplitAtomBoom on YouTube.
Story Writing: Conflict doesn't just me disharmony. It means acts and characters that represent
active opposition to the protagonist and forces of good, directly, on a direct level, not just a
detached distant one like a mastermind plotting somewhere. You also need to write about the
police and bullies waiting right outside the heroes house and how he deals with the everyday or
direct confrontation demons and monsters. There are different levels of conflict. But conflict is
opposition. It is both passive and aggressive, both direct and indirect. There needs to be a direct
threat and risk and danger, not just a distant one.
#ThingsILearnedbyReading #Story #RobertMcKee
-------Profession, Things I've Officially Done Work In:

Novelist
Graphic Novelist
Cartoonist
Creator
Conceptual Designers
Screenwriter
Inventor
----------

P a g e | 816

Newest profession I'm fascinated by (and there are a lot)? Documentary Filmmaking! Kevin
Smith, Anime DVD special feature Docs, TV Docs, 90s MTV docs, Ovation, art, literary, film,
anime, comic book, and Historical Docs, BBC, Ken Burns, Werner Herzog, Michael Moore,
Morgan Spurlock. I LOVE documentaries. Anything that analyzes a popular or academic subject
matter. Maybe with a camera, perhaps even just my smart phone I could practice making my
own documentary on my favorite subjects! I could make documentaries about important or
influential or obscure issues. Or I could make amateur documentaries about nothing at all.
Anything to sharpen my skills!
Truth is, there aren't any gay characters in Parallax, except homophobes in the closet. But there is
blatant acts of gay discrimination. Epithets used by evil characters. While I may or may not be
homophobic in nature (that's up for debate), I don't openly discriminate against gay people. I've
known too many gay and bisexual people to discriminate like my brother Andrew does, or Ha Ha
Viva Caligula across the fence. They're sociopaths, and there's plenty of homophobic sociopaths.
Which makes sense. Sociopaths are essentially sophisticated psychopaths.
Topics to address in future adult literature:

Violence
Politics
Justice and Law
Gay culture and homosexuality
Pedophilia
Racism
Bigotry
Theft
Rape
Abortion and Right to Life
Parenthood
Drugs and Alcohol
Bullying
Adulthood
Writers
Terrorism
Freedom of Speech
Freedom of Expression
Religion
Sociopathology
Gaslighting
Hackers

P a g e | 817

Spies
Big Brother
Intimidation
For every last person who ever lashed out at me for whatever reason, there is a story and
plot waiting to be written.

I am a diplomat. That means my relationship with the international community, (Especially

Japan) is VERY important. I'm the missing link. Many Japanese like me as a person, as a
personality, as an archetype, and as a character. But my relationship with Japan is delicate,
vulnerable, and fraught with potential hostilities, obstacles and difficulties. It's almost political
how important it feels to me. It doesn't matter to everyone else all the time, only some. But it
matters to me, and people that matter. The fate of the relationship between East and West,
between America and Japan hangs in the balance. If the communication is on good terms, it will
open doors for many others struggling just as I am. If it fails, many will be set back and suffer.
There's a political and spiritual significance to it. As a part Chinese, being well aware of Chinese
and Japanese rivalry makes the situation even more potentially vulnerable, because by saying or
doing the wrong thing at the wrong time, in the wrong way could drive important people away. I
can't afford to be a bigot or bully. I have to strive for perfection. I have to answer to myself, but
also listen to what my fans, readers, and viewers have to say. I've built my reputation on being a
person who does care. I sometimes am not sure which tone of voice is appropriate on twitter, as
I'm paving the cultural and social way, on social media. Is it okay to close one or more of my
accounts if I am not comfortable or get discouraged? Should I be irreverent or kind? Am I a
metal head or manga-ka, or both? Should I cuss or keep it G or PG or PG-13? Should I stay
silent, speak sometimes, or be a talking head or babbler? Does silence matter? Is communication
valuable? These are all questions I wished I had an elder to ask. But on the internet, I AM the
elder. I AM the authority figure and status quo in one sense, yet not in another. There's no
established protocol or code of conduct or rulebook. I'm writing it. Am I the norm, or abnormal?
Am I sensitive or tough? Am I masculine or feminine? Am I an American geek or pro-Japanese
hipster? Am I cool and counterculture, or cool and popular? Or am I lame? Am I the good guy,
the "bad" guy, the black guy, or all three?? I have no one to consult. I'm so innovative my mere
PRESENCE raises a staggering amount of questions. But I must learn to accept it. That is what a
hero does. He accepts himself, and the world if he's going to save it.
--------I found 2 main public criminal record sites that had a crime listening of my former bully Bryan
R. Johnston over in Dalton, Massachusetts. His story is quite offensive and shocking. He's
definitely a bad guy. And a criminal. All this is on public record now. He can't hide anymore.
His address and maps of his house are listed and everything. Now that he's been convicted of
murder one in the first degree, it's all over. For him. He WAS envious of my fame and money.

P a g e | 818

He's envious of people who have the future potential to attain more fame and money than him,
including me, and therefore has lots of ill will against them, aka us.
HA! Who knew trashing Bryan Johnston and his criminal records and failures could be so
profitable?! It's amazing. Now that people knows he's the bad guy, I get to be the good guy
again, and I'm making money again. Small amounts, but I'm okay with that, because it's my blog
which usually makes nothing. Bryan worked as a police officer, yet at the same time he is
charged with assault on a police officer with a deadly weapon. Odd.
Jhonen Vasquez and Jim Mahfood are has beens. They lost their ability to produce appealing,
quality artwork a long time ago. I stopped following them YEARS ago. Their new work is shit. I
used to appreciate them, but they've changed. Jim's in left field and Jhonen's just a fucking
asshole and never puts any effort into his drawings anymore, just like Piro. I can't draw anymore.
It's too much work. I'm done-zoh. The bridge to the world of being a famous artist is now
burned, collapses into a watery grave and everything. It's over.
If I'm not being guided by a better, bigger artist, you couldn't surgically remove a good drawing
from my brain. I'm braindead without an art teacher, editor, and genuine guidance. I need
someone to lead ME. Without someone leading me, I'm LOST.
My Writing is great. My Writing is Amazing. It's structurally sound, forward charging, and
invincible because it is well concealed. It's like a channeled freight train. A powerful force of
nature that only moves into the future. It experimental literature.
But it's plotless. The plot is the flow of letters into words into sentences into paragraphs, into
sections, into pages, into scenes, into chapters, into a series of books that I eventually have to
pick a stopping point of.
People have watched 1 million minutes worth of viewing time for all my videos in total. I've
gone pretty far. Not one to brag or anything though. But the numbers do speak for themselves.
I seem to have made an enemy today. Someone angry about something involving his own videos
getting taken down, so therefore I must delete all my most popular videos, too. You see, it's only
fair of course. NOT! That's rich. Apparently now certain video publishers want to tell other video
publishers to "delete your videos". This is the first enemy I've made on my home turf for "Being
too powerful and winning all the time". Oh well. I won't lose any sleep over it. If they keep
sending messages saying that, I'll ban them. I find that kind of thing just a tad bit irritating. I
have the power to make it so he's never able to watch my videos ever again. I don't think he
realizes he doesn't have ANY power over me ultimately.
By now I've made more television appearances than I care to remember.

P a g e | 819

All right. I might become a fashion designer and documentary filmmaker in my spare time. I
don't even know if I am a documentary filmmaker. I am a general filmmaker. Filmmaking
fascinates me quite a bit. Probably more than it used to.
I like the concept of literary film theory. Filmmakers like Truffaut and Maya Deren. Those who
weren't afraid to let the camera meander.
I don't mean this as a put off, but there's something weird about the way the United States'
reception of "literary" creators such as Yoshiyuki Tomino. I used to think he was the most
literary TV writer around, seeing as he was also a science fiction novelist as well. But SF novels
aside, what actual written words has anybody actually read by Tomino? I think even Hiroshi
Kakurazaka (All You Need is Kill) sets a better example. Yoshiyuki Tomino's actual literature he
has managed to create is unseen most. We see his concepts, we see his words' influence, but we
never, if hardly ever, see any of his prose and scripts. I really should buy his Gundam novels.
Time to find some new influences. Actually, honestly? I have a new biggest literary influence on
my animation screenwriting and prose: Me. I can now appreciate my own writing as though
someone else wrote it. It feels objective enough. I'm my new favorite screenwriter and novelist,
American or otherwise.
Friday, August 9th, 2013,
Schedule:
Got an video journal interview with an old friend up North that I've known since I was in
preschool, lined up for sometime this evening, as soon as his shift ends at the sporting goods
store, and he finishes rehearsals for the acting gig he's working on. It will probably be nearly all
improvisational. We won't be rehearsing anything. I'm not busy, but he is.
Saturday, August 10th, 2013,
The interviews with Chris went well. Keeping a video diary on my comp was a surprisingly good
idea. I have interviews, monologues, rants, humor, obscure discussion topics, friends, and even a
little martial arts choreography that actually shows athletic skill, like my Tai Chi Sword Kendo
practice choreography video. I'm better with mixed sword martial arts than I thought. Tai Chi
Sword Kendo is my own style of swordfighting, where the blade twirls and flips while striking
forward and to the side as well as some unplanned suburi, as I do my slow and fast step routine.
Finally I can put that John Kreng fight choreography book I've been studying into practice and
use.
Now I'm going to take a break from filmmaking for a day or few and catch my breath. Sit back
and watch some Toonami tonight, alone. Just as I like it.
I'm proud of the small amount of filmmaking footage I've created so far.

P a g e | 820

Renouncing and retiring from art and drawing for comics, illustration, concept art, design,
lighting design, and or animation, anime, and manga, may be one of the best thing's that's ever
happened to me. Letting art die will free up my time to now become a full time writer, so I can
produce 10 times as much poetry, short stories, novels, and scripts.
I've never been so happy to retire as an artist, including online.
Now I'm just a humble, hard working, disciplined, and strong willed writer.
I dreamt this day would come. And now it finally has. The day when I can leave the world of
being a "modern artist" behind. Way back in the dust.
With a full time writing gig, which has already started, I'll be able to finally get closer to my goal
on my quest to feel like I've written enough. By my own standards. Not anyone else's.
I'm no longer in the business of drawing or painting anything. I'm a Tech Titan, Filmmaker, and
writer.
I'll never conquer the world of art. And I finally realized it.
I wonder why Cary's pride and joy Walgreens that he cares about more than me is never in the
headlines, yet every company I work for is in the news, for both better and worse.
You don't become a writer to be admired like you would if you were an artist. Because it's not
going to happen. You write for the passion of the creativity that drives you.
Chris is definitely my oldest friend of all time. Probably one of the few people left on the planet
who either A) Hasn't been corrupted by the internet, B) Is still an actual friend, C) Isn't a phony.
Everyone else is a phony.
There's got to be someone else (Some Fan) out there who passes out halfway through One Piece
every Saturday, right? Damn state-ordered pills. It's impossible to stay awake past 2 or 3 a.m.
with those pills, at the most. And if I don't let myself get forced to miss Adult Swim / Toonami /
The overnights, I get put in the jail known as a psych ward. I've never been to jail, but I've been
to psyche wards, and everyone seems to refer to those as jails. Goodbye freedom. If Toonami
does go off the air, it wouldn't have anything to do with me. I certainly wouldn't have control
over it, seeing as I'm forced by doctors and parents to ingest pills each night that make me fall
asleep halfway through Adult Swim and all the better shows come on. I have no control over it.
It's forced Doom. If I had my way, I'd be driving around Downtown Orlando in a Red Cadillac
right about now.
There was a time in history, when I never slept. Middle School. In Middle School before they put
me on pills, I had a severe case of insomnia. All the Ritalin or whatever medicine I was on. kept
me hyperfocused

P a g e | 821

Thursday, August 15th, 2013,

I did my debut stream of my very own web TV live streaming channel. It was on air for 4 hours
of glory and wonder! The possibilities of how I can profit and benefit in power, and financially
from this site, are limitless!
Combining computers file management or uploading with TV and video is like combining
peanut butter with chocolate. I'm bringing video and TV into the Twenty-First Century, like no
other before me. I'm also benefiting the Japanese market a lot, with my entrepreneurial
innovations involving anime streaming and live online video.
I didn't used to have so much self-confidence. But then I started reading up on how to be selfconfident, and I put my money where my mouth is. That helped.
"Round the Clock Coverage"
2:32: ActionToon's 10 hour broadcast cycle is 23% complete. I'm halfway to being halfway
done. Now that it's premiere the first hour of new content, I'm allowing my broadcast to re-air so
anyone who missed the explosive first hour can tune in at any point. People can watch large
chunks of the stream on LIVE repeat play, or they can scope just a little bit. Either way it's a
recipe for good new fashioned internet fun. I enjoyed the HELL out of that content when I saw it.
I don't feel biased in saying that at all. It stands on its own, with it's own set of strengths, with or
without me.
3:09: Just checking in. Today's schedule is 30% Complete. I specifically made an on air schedule
that doesn't compete with any shows that are actually good. This is the mid afternoon after all.
TV Suckfest is the only competition. Easy win.
3:38. 33%. Not much on regular TV. Good thing I'm here.
Currently on: Big O and Yu Yu Neo Toonami Clips. That's the very end, it goes "offline" then it
starts from the beginning with Tim Jenson's song.
Every hour is 10% of my schedule. I'm getting better at this "business math" thing I think.
Apparently, I kind of have to.
4:15: ActionToonTV.com is 41% complete. Just about halfway there.
11: 15: 100% Complete. Wrapped up the ActionToon airing an hour ago or so. That was one of
the most gratifying feelings I've ever had in my entire life. And my webpage got 71 views today
alone, for 1 day. I'd call that another successful day of online internet indie broadcasting.
In terms of my channel, at 71 views and 9 hours of nonstop LIVE streaming airtime, I'm ready to
get a little R&R. I'll keep toggling with my DVD collection and livestream tomorrow, after I get
some rest from this successful day of hard work.

P a g e | 822

Back To Business As Usual

Captain Harlock's costume and demeanor, is, like, just so uncool. Can't believe I fell for Leiji
Matsumoto's emotional parlor tricks. Ichigo is better than you! You win THIS round Leiji
Matsumoto! said Ichigo. But I'll be BACK! LULZ! Not really.
I do like being powerful. I didn't hold back as much today. I could have used more power, a LOT
more, but what I used from my arsenal was good enough.
Wow. My writing is powerful. I had no idea. God I love my writing. I'm so very, very talented.
One day I'll be a very powerful writer, just like M. Night Shyamalan, The Wachowski's and
Quentin Tarantino. Just with animation instead. Like George Lucas, Tezuka, and Disney. I'm the
Lord Prince of All Action Toons. The URL name is not a lie. My power niche really is fighting
and action. I sketch it. I illustrate concepts of it. I storyboard it. I choreograph it. and I script it.
This could turn out to be a very profitable niche for me one day, assuming I'm actually able to
sell the niche to someone.
Andrew's family's over. It's LOSER TIME! Time to FAIL! YET AGAIN! Mr. Jobless himself.
Wow.
Cary thinks he can control me and gain power over me with anti-psychotic pills, despite the fact
that it's a misdiagnosis, I've never been schizo, and I don't need any antipsychotic drugs. Cary
admits he wants me to take his pills because he's power hungry and "wants control". It's a trump
card on his part.
Wednesday, August 21st, 2013,
Copying me on the internet is the number 1 way to assure I'll never, EVER have sex with you in
real life. Probably ever in the next million years.
On to other topics
I wish people still used email as much as they used to with me.
Not the best of evenings. I got a lot of work done this and yesterday afternoon.
But I feel half dead right now. And all dead inside.
Partially because I have a cold I seem to be coming down with, and it's bring on a deep blue
depression
Google is now currently the world's biggest media company, worth roughly about $37.9 billion.
And Viacom? Viacom's a joke in the media world. They're not even worth $11 billion! Viacom
didn't even make it onto the international media CHART.

P a g e | 823

Other international media companies did, though. In 2nd, 3rd, 4th, and 6th place on the moneypower chart are DirecTVGroup ($27.2 billion), News Corporation ($26 billion), Walt Disney
Company ($19.7 billion), and Time Warner ($15.6 billion)

Google/YouTube - No. 1 Ranked Media Company, beating Time Warner

Barack Obama, Mark Zuckerberg, Larry Page - No. 1 Most Powerful People
Stanford University - No. 1 Ranked School, surpassing Harvard & Ivy League

My life goal is already achieved, at the age of 29/30 in the year 2013 A.D. I wanted to create one
or a few awesome comic pages, something to build bigger things on. And I did. 11 of them or
more, to be exact. I've already succeeded. I've created, designed, built, and drawn a killer indiemanga series. I've established the model, the archetypes, the blueprints. And all it cost to make
was my livelihood and privacy. But at least the end justifies the means. There is no need for
outside approval. I've finally created the kind of comic book I'd want to see in a store and buy.
All that's left to do now is continue the tradition. I don't have a publisher or studio backing my
actions, my parents still think I'm crazy, I'm a media scapegoat, and I still get bullied, but I don't
care about that. I'm happy because I did what I set out to do. My work here...is done. I've done
my job. I've created the mid draft of my product: Stylish comic book pages. I have everything I
need to maintain my honor. Hard work.
"All obstacles were considered insignificant, when compared with The Goal."
-The World's 100 Greatest People
Audio book Series
But even when you HAVE achieved greatness, you can't and shouldn't expect anyone to care,
namedrop you, or make a big deal out of you or your project. As a matter of fact there's a high
likelihood people will treat you even worse than they already do. There IS NO social reward or
pleasure in making it to the finish line. Just the internal and introverted feeling of a job well
done. Don't expect food, don't expect money. Don't even expect a credit in a movie or TV show.
Don't even bother to expect a thank you, a pat on the back, or any kind of reward like that.
Expect your father's bad case of alzheimer's and insanity and your siblings/parents' already lousy
disposition to deteriorate to even lower levels as you watch it happen. But the important thing is,
you reached your personal goal of success. Just looking at the finished product is enough to
make me happy.
That's the THING. They're amazing at illustration/design. But their TERRIBLE at sequential art,
which is in secret the hardest element to master and draw in. None of them know how to draw

P a g e | 824

actual comics, ESPECIALLY by hand that come anywhere near the level of their still
illustrations. That's their secret weakness, their dead weight, their blind spot. POUNCE ON IT!
Insider info I learned from a professional comic book editor:
Actual sequential art is 40 times harder to draw than sketches and illustrations. It takes away all
of your power to even do 1 panel.
Many artists are not aware of this. You may do great design/illustration work, but if you don't
practice your sequential art, it will look horrible compared to your other work. Mine already did
look horrible. Everyone's does in the beginning, even Jhonen and Todd McFarlane's sequential
art looked that way at the start: Horrible. But it's like lifting weights, the more you do it, the
better you get. Getting good at drawing comics involves willpower. You never master it without
trying, being untalented or unskilled, and it's always a conscious act, compulsion, and decision.
Nothing about sequential art is accidental. If the page looks good, it's because the artist wanted it
to be good, and succeeded. It's very common among aspiring pros to talk a lot of shit without
actually drawing any tangible sequential art. "I have it all figured out in my head" they say, while
showing a big, fat nothing. Talk is cheap, because everyone talks. Work is expensive. I'm glad I
finally learned that part.
I've decided to maybe become a working man again, for the first time in more than 8 years. Sure
beats sitting on my ass arguing with bad cable TV and Cary Alberts all day. Everyone was
harping on me because I didn't have a job, and now I might have a real job again. I took this
initiative when I realized spending the entire day at home waiting around to do creative work and
get ideas was incredibly unproductive. YouTube and CN don't need me that much. I need to do
manual labor.
My reasons for wanting to get work in L.A. aren't that different than those of anyone else looking
to find work in Hollywood: Money, Power, Fame, Nice Big House, Success, Being treated like
royalty, Women. The American Dream. Money changes things. Part of why I pursued work in
L.A. was not because I wanted a mate, but more because I wanted to buy my own house and pay
my bills.
Sunday, August 25th, 2013,
Nothing to write about. Nothing is happening lately. No new developments I am aware of.
Monday, August 26th, 2013,
Hair Cuttery isn't all that bad. At least there's cute girls working there. It's like Supercuts, but
with less emphasis on glam.

P a g e | 825

Tuesday, August 27th, 2013,

I'm a pretty big supporter and endorser of the Writer's Guild. I believe writers should be paid for
all their hard work. Too bad there's no protection for artists online. But the guild does protect
writers from getting conned much of the time.
Speaking of Writing, been making progress with my writing.
Aside from finishing my first pro script last year and registering it with the Guild, I'm working
on a follow up for a subsequent episode this year. This is my second pro script, and it's another
Parallax episode. I'm no longer writing episodes in the order I plan to distribute and broadcast
them in. My Parallax episode scripts and their outlines are becoming more and more nonlinear
by the day. The initial draft of my second pre-script outline is complete. I wrote most of it earlier
today, prior to this evening.
TV and downloading isn't as popular as it once was. Streaming broadcasts and content like
anime and TV shows (another one of my brainchildren), seem to be on the rise. But I'm keeping
my job as a screenwriter in L.A. (probably) if my streaming gig doesn't yield any results. It
would benefit someone. But who exactly has yet to be determined.
The hackers work pretty fast in terms of gathering information and spreading it around.
Definitely a good idea to acquire a typewriter. Word processors aren't really safe or secure. But
typewriters are.
Who wins in comics? That's easy. The person who's books you always have an opened or worn
out copy on your desk of, or the ones that are featured prominently in a box or bookshelf. The
books you as a reader are always looking through are the ones that are doing the most well, on an
individual basis.
Wednesday, August 28th, 2013,
My parents are gullible. They're susceptible to giving into, guarding against, believing in, falling
for, and distributing medication (to me obviously, cuz I'm the "deadweight blacksheep" and
"Weakest link" in the family bloodline
Here's what they've pestered me about with constant therapy and doctor's visits at an obsessive
level, with nearly all of them being misdiagnoses and disproven later on by later research.
ADD (1995) / Medication
Bipolar / Manic Depression (1999) / More medication
Schizophrenia (2002) More medication
Asperger's Autism (2003-2005) More medication

P a g e | 826

Obesity, Weightloss, Unhealthy eating, cavities, diabetes, "White blood cell count" (2007)
All of those conditions were diagnosable trends in the medical and psychological community in
the years I listed. With my parents you're only guarantee is they'll be "concerned" with
SOMETHING they'll just wait for orders to forcefeed you pills for. Whatever the lowest, most
common, most pathetic, most easy to make fun of medical condition, they will choose to unload
on you like "Good parents", not "obsessive hyper-medical, hyper-conservative, health nut freaks
that they are now. I wonder what it will be next with them. What government funded psychiatric
phase and trend will it be next time with them. Now that they have no weapons to tear apart my
mind and dissect my psyche, I'm sure their attention will turn into labwork and maybe even OCD
doctors visits, just reaching and searching for something abnormal and wrong.
Thursday, August 29th, 2013,
I borrow elements from variety of certain storytelling genres and sources

Indie Comics
Serial Shonen and Seinen Manga
Superhero, Tragic Hero, & Anti-Hero Comics
Anime
Greek and Roman Mythology, Mythopoeia (Tolkien, Joseph Campbell)
Epic High Fantasy
Sword comics, books, and movies
Science Fiction Fantasy (Michael Moorcock, George Lucas)
Chinese Wuxia Martial Arts
Japanese Chanbara
French New Wave Cinema, Existentialist Philosophy-Literature, and BD
French and Japanese Animation Co-Productions
American Cop Shows
Crime Fiction
Gritty Neo-Noir
Organic Architecture
Notan Art
Apocalypse, Ballistic War Cinema, and Horror Literature

P a g e | 827

After much initial rejection and hateful criticism, from many

within
and
without
the
industry,
community,
and
online
international and local community (most of it manifesting as
eccentric, hateful and malicious and eccentric Hollywood-ized
portrayals of inappropriate and conveniently inaccurate taboo
behaviors / on-screen-dialogue by "stand in" look-alike doubles,
bodily functions, and off the mark facial and racially based
stereotyped (not to mention awfully racist) characteristics,
ironically enough. Hey! That's AMERICA! That's why we "love"
you), I've managed to start something entirely new in both of my
Two Favorite Mediums: Animation and Comic Book Production. Those
who have borrowed elements from my style are able to make their
own unique contributions, and yet still in fact laying the
groundwork of what appears to be an entirely new industry and
genre, on many levels, from YouTube to costume and lighting
design to choreography to online comics. I feel such pride when
I look back at my foundation I designed and built with my own
two hands, a computer with an internet connection, and an
arsenal of sharpie markers and pens, on numerous levels. I
STARTED something. I got something off the ground. I'm fairly
young and yet other artists and writers and autuers worldwide in
six continents consistently borrow elements from me. You can't
put a price on success and international influence like that,
much as some may want to. If it had a price, I'd have had the
number in my bank statement long ago. My Typology-Numerology
nickname is no lie.
I Truly Am The INTP Architect-Master
Builder. I built something great, stable, long lasting, and
important with no initially money or resources other than a few
inexpensive computers, the internet, and software.
I've was in brief correspondence with animation and media celebrities like Steve Blum and
Thomas Romain at one point. But they're busy guys. It's never easy to approach someone like
that. They're living legends. I seem to have struck up a complimentary friendship with the Editor
in Chief of Animation Magazine, Ramin Zahed. Though his schedule is really overbooked, and
he's written countless articles for Animation Magazine related topics, somehow he still finds time
to strike up a newly found friendship with me. Ramin is a people person. Very outgoing and
loves to chat it up with many people as long as it has something to do with animation and the
industry surrounding it. I also got a brief response to a phone message I sent to Dave Sim. Dave
Sim and Ramin Zahed are two of the most talented authors and writers there are in animation and
comic books. It's great getting to speak with real fellow writers for a change. People who can
appreciate the art of arranging words on a page like I do. Not just artists, designers, animators,

P a g e | 828

and illustrators. I'd love to have Ramin contribute an article, essay, foreword, or introduction to
one of my future publication, but I probably should need to get to know him better. He does
seem like the kind of writer who's going to be around in another 20 to 30 years.

P a g e | 829

Chapter 21

P a g e | 830

Thursday, August 29th, 2013,

Whatever you do now, at this moment is where you are in reality.
So I'm an industry hopeful. A guy who wants to go pro in the traditional sense, but hasn't yet, as I
have literally no money for 4-6 months on end and am not earning any money at it yet. I work
out of the home, which I call my "studio". I'm not the most popular person in the world. I'm not
even normal popular, let alone famous. I'm a writer, online broadcaster, author, online comic
book creator, blogger, conceptual designer, novelist, and screenwriter, who's finished a script
that was registered with the guild in 2012
Through my comic book design, and through my animation production, I am working toward a
very tangible goal. I'm building a new kind of mature cartoon for theatre and television. One
with drama, fantasy, cinema, crime stories, adventure, science, grittiness, violence, and emotion.
One that writes about and speaks to adult contemporary issues and adult problems. Not the usual
cute and friendly kids cartoon. I realize that is what animation used to be built on, but there's a
new market in development, manifesting itself in the industry, and I sense I could become a
leader in that genre.
Some things can't be helped in terms of doing much of your drawing and writing work in your
own house, like getting caught up in the lives of the people surrounding you, interruptions, and
"getting too laid back, casual, uninhibited, and comfortable" in response to the pressure that can
comes from being one of the top personalities and unseen Leaders in Toontown, or modern
animation and comic book production. You get to interact with business types, people who only
work in comics, people who only work in TV, people who only work in film and L.A., people
who only write books or draw comics, and people who do all of the above, like the Lucasfilm
and media franchise crowds. Some people cop an enormous attitude and ego with me, and others
bring none of that to the table at all. It is my job to be a real shoulder to cry on. An empathic ear
and eye, that gets to listen to, Lead, Motivate, Communicate, and be accommodating to as many
of them as I possibly can. Like any good compassionate producer and boss. I have the final say
on who stays on my tweetfeed and who gets kicked out, if anyone, depending on the course of
actions they choose for me and themselves. Some are better at handling the pressure than others.
Some aren't even aware any of this is going on. Some take just a little bit too much glee in
embarrassing and frustrating me. Those are the ones I fire from my feed. The ones who "don't get
it" and think it's about them and not me.
I'll say this much about Twitter: There's only one to a few rules I enforce on my tweet feed, and
they're only fair, they make sense. And that is:

P a g e | 831

Your Twitter-Joe Contract:

On my tweetfeed, you are free and have complete freedom to do and say anything you want to
promote, me, yourself, your life, your news, your events, your friends, co-workers, bosses,
companies you work for, brands your associated with, and colleagues. You're free to say and do
whatever you want for however long you want....EXCEPT defame me and make me and my
cronies on twitter look bad or defamed. In which case your actions will result in immediate
termination and removal of your twitter handle and profile from my tweet feed, where you will
be deleted from the roster, and reported for either A) Abuse, slander, harassment, ill will, libel or
B) Spam. This includes but is not limited to defamatory statements and photo or art imagery that
is deemed obscene, explicit, defamatory, or in any way unsavory.
Amazon has some new genre and sub-genre sections and bestseller categories in its Comics and
Graphic Novels Section. Including:

Action & Adventure Manga (705 listings, tons of One Piece)

Art of Comics and Manga (573 listings)
Fantasy Graphic Novels (4,927 listings)
Science Fiction Graphic Novels (4,836 listings)
Media Tie-In Graphic Novels (1,559 listings)
How To Create Comics & Manga (2,589 listings)

It'll be interesting to see what kinds of comics end up showing up in these 6 categories. One
Piece is currently dominating the Action Adventure Manga section, which kind of surprised me,
but I found it cool. One Piece has a lot of trades available. More than 60 of them.
Trials:

Zimmerman
Casey Anthony
Michael Jackson
R Kelly
Phil Specter
OJ Simpson
World War II War Crimes Tribunal

Current academic interests:

Military
Judicial
Political

P a g e | 832

Justice
Forensics and Investigation
---------------------------------------

Saturday, August 31st, 2013,

I've done 3,000+ pages of art in my sketchbooks

& 4,600+ pages of what is writing (mostly from journals)
Total = 7,600 pages of literature..
If you count my online writing...
It's closer to 8,000 pages of art & writing
---------

I used to have to deal with the anxiety, procrastination, and a phobic reaction to getting started
on my scripts and comics. Now their beginning stories and volumes are finished. Now I have an
entirely new form of anxiety: Fear of finishing. Completion Anxiety. I have these feelings
currently now, even though the work is done. I've already finished my first comics one shot and
animation spec sript. They're good, but not perfect by any means, especially the one shot. There's
not really much I can do about it other than keep working at it and producing a series of follow
up works, pages, and volumes. I guess finishing mini projects doesn't really completely put my
mind at ease. Idleness makes me anxious and nervous. And depressed. Being mentally active
keeps me happy.
"Where am I stuck?" you ask?
I'm stuck somewhere between finishing and editing the first to final draft, and going out there
and networking in L.A., with email, or finding clients to do the negotiation where I don't have to.
In other words, it's the selling, pitching, and approaching process in Los Angeles I've been
avoiding.
Classic Manga I Want to Investigate:

Captain Hurlock
Blackjack
Buddha
Astro Boy
Lone Wolf & Cub
Usagi Yojimbo

That's 100% Vintage manga. Maybe there's a few elements of execution of layouts in there I
could learn a thing or two from.

P a g e | 833

All Narrative Mediums Start off with Titles that initially have simple execution, but that grow,
over decades to evolve into becoming something more complex.
Television, Film, Animation, Comic Books, CGI, Anime, Manga, Science Fiction, Fantasy,
Music, Video Games, American Manga, American Anime. All pioneers start off with simple
layouts and compositions.
Sunday, September 1st, 2013
Wow. I think I just realized I make a great private celebrity correspondent. I'm good at talking to
celebrities. Especially by phone and email...
Celebrities I've Corresponded With:

Phil Ferretti
John Lasseter
Todd McFarlane
Jhonen Vasquez
Steve Blum
Thomas Romain
Savin Yeatman-Eiffell
Yoshitoshi ABe
Dan Vado
Dave Sim
Ramin Zahed
Katsuhiro Otomo
Raynart
Jamie S. Rich
Ben Kalina
Carlos Ramos
Adult Swim
Toonami
Williams Street
--------

My struggle lies mostly with acceptance,

with the blank page,
With attaining payment,
with equality,
and often, with other people.

P a g e | 834

Cary's admitted he doesn't consider himself my father anymore. He doesn't treat me like a son
anymore (just a "nuisance"), and doesn't love me. At all. Not like he does Andrew. He HATES
me and wants people to not know I exist, by isolating me from the outside world, by force, not
even by choice. He doesn't want other people to know I'm his son, and doesn't have any pictures
of me in his wallet. I don't give him any inspiration whatsoever, and neither does my success or
career. He hates me with a passion, and is more than happy to boss me around without my
consent and while I'm under duress.
After a reality check, I've realized I don't really have any rewards to look forward to. Not with
parents like mine. With parents like mine, the only incentive and reward I have to keep moving
forward and onward is A) The accumulation of creative work in paper stacks around the house,
and B) The fact that I'm going to get to live for another hour or so, and live to fight another battle
tomorrow. Everything else is shaky at best. TV's not what it once was. It's ruined and hostile.
And the internet is just hostile, especially if it's anything other than anime footage and research. I
live for the moment now more than ever.
------Monday, September 3rd, 2013,
You know I always did like Pee Wee Herman (the theatrical character). Pee Wee Herman was a
character I grew up on, much like Tim Burton, and Jim Henson's the Muppets. As well as the
Adams Family. One of my birth family relatives is actually named Pee Wee, according to my
birth mom. I sense Pee Wee Herman might just be making some kind of a comeback onto the
media stage. He makes me laugh. That's pretty much all there is to it. Him and Robin Williams.
And Jim Carrey, and a few others.
Is doing an honest day's work for an honest day's pay making a comeback? I don't know, but I
know I value an honest day's work. Putting an honest day's worth of work into everything you
do. Money is irrelevant. As long as you earn your money honestly, that is all that matters...to me.
Friday, September 6th, 2013,
It's been a slow news week. And it FEELS like a slow news week, which is good. As the old
saying goes, no news is good news.
If Fred Durst and Katsuhiro Otomo say you've "made it"...Then you've officially made it. And I
am making it. In the big time. I'm a celebrity. And a power player. Business is good. And that's
all I have to say about that. My fame works in mysterious ways, as does my power. But they're
real. Oh how they're real. They're very real. Why else would so many beautiful ladies want to

P a g e | 835

have sex with me. Fame and power are an aphrodisiac. It drives women wild. Pretty cool. I say to
myself, "Wow, that's pretty neat." But anyway, enough with the sex references. It's time I got
back on track.
The intensity of my spiritual and creative power is seismic, it's so intense. That would make a
good twitter nickname: "Seismic". Like my power is so great it rivals the seismic intensity of
God and Nature. Well, in extreme instances. I don't remember being that strong and powerful
when I was 7. I grew up into a very intense, angry young man.
Force of Nature
Comics' Most Powerful Artists, Maybe of All Time:
1. Osamu Tezuka
2. Moebius
3. Dave Sim
4. Katsuhiro Otomo
5. Akira Toriyama
6. Frank Miller
7. Todd McFarlane
8. Eiichiro Oda
9. Musashi Kishimoto
10. Jamie Hewlett
Qualifications:
Profundity
Wisdom
Density
Intensity
Complexity
Prolificacy
Awe
Splendor
I can sense the power in each and every one of those important cartoonists / comics auteurs.
They paved the way for many artists of lesser power who I am also a fan of for the most part. I
will not publish this list as it is purely my opinion and not meant to be taken as authority or
biblical law. Not everyone feels the same way I do, but that is how I feel. In terms of relevance,
most of those artists were most powerful years ago, but their influence and force can still be felt
to this day. The thing is, when you're powerful, you have a renaissance period. That time is in the
past for the majority of these artists, except the manga power icons, and part of their secret is
they are protected by the isolationist power of the Japanese comic book system. Those two are

P a g e | 836

protected by a spiritual great wall, the kind of cultural media wall Tokyo, Japan specializes in
building. I question whether America has anything in its current condition to rival it, at least in
terms of stability. Certainly not me. I'm 100 times lower than their level. It would be dangerous
to say I'm at that kind of level. But I can certain appreciate someone who is at that level.
Truth be told though, I did emulate Hiroaki Samura, Katsuhiro Otomo, and Dave Sim's literary
and visual power initially. Not consciously. I didn't sit down and say "Okay now, I'm going to
copy my favorite artist's raw power". But UN-consciously, that's kind of exactly what I did. It's
part of why I wrote so many goddamn pages and slaughtered entire forests to print up my work. I
emulated Dave Sim and Leo Tolstoy's density, especially. Just the thickest, massive, biggest,
densest book I could find. I said to myself "THAT. Is what I want to do for a living. Be
powerful."
Powerful people...are rare. And rarity breeds in isolation. Geniuses, Titans of Industry. They are
not a well populated race. Power and Importance is Special. It is Valuable. It's similar to gold.
When people find it, and are Aware of what they have found, they are for the most part unlikely
and unwilling to share it. I question whether it is possible to have too many powerful people in
one place. It almost seems like nature doesn't want power and intensity to be ubiquitous, but
instead it wants it to be rare. This is what my intuition has told me.
Dave Sim himself, in a correspondence with me, once warned me against authoring a continued
story, and recommended I work on individual issues. Probably good advice, but I don't entirely
agree. I'm kind of going against his advice. I understand what he's saying, and he's right.
Continuing indefinitely would just wear me down. Setting up a stopping point however might be
useful.
I've got to learn to stop being so selfish. My parents are getting old. I've got to learn to take care
of them, and the pets. Become my parents' keeper. The parent of my parents. That's what I'm
going to have to become. When dad gets dementia, he's not going to be able to take care of
himself. He might not even be able to do basic functions by himself. I'm going to have to hire a
caretaker for the elderly (my parents), in time.
No one but my mother knows how tired I am. I've been taking care of my mom a lot. She can't
really walk. Not very well anyway, due to her hip pain. She needs a cane and a walker to get
around, like a friggin geezer granny. It's incredibly sad to watch. I need to help her. I need to
help keep her safe. She's getting older.
I want to be more giving, more humble, less selfish, less self-absorbed, more responsible, more
capable, more nurturing, more parental. I want to take care of my parents, in time, as though they
were my children. Taking care of parents is like taking care of whiney children. But what choice
do I have. They have no money to afford caregivers. And if they do have money, it isn't much,
despite the fact Dad's slowly working himself to death and doesn't treat me as well as his
customers. Still, how they view me doesn't matter. In one sense I am responsible for them.

P a g e | 837

Having independence, autonomy, and responsibility means you're responsible and smart enough
not to only look out for and care about YOURself and YOUR BACK. As you get older, you'll
have other people to take care of, whether you have your own kids or not.
I pray to Lord the God for many things.
I pray for more strength, more willpower and discipline. More inner strength.

The Strength to Love and Serve my Parents. Regardless of how they view and treat me
More strength to love and help Myself.
The Strength to Practice Drawing Comics and Finished Drawings and Sketches. Every
Day
The Strength to Keep On
The Strength to Work on and Finish Every Last One of My Many Future Books

I take refuge in the Lord to Deliver me from Evil, and bestow on my the Greatest Resolve. The
Lord Loves me like few others do. The Lord Gives Me Refuge, and The Buddha helps me
Transcend Godless Temporal Reality.
If Jesus Ascended into Heaven upon his Crucifixion, so too can anyone else - Ascend to Heaven
once their time upon this is complete.
Jesus protects me from the Hatred of the Other, who likes to laugh at other people's misfortune.
Forgive Thy Neighbor, as Thy Neighbor Trespasses Against Thyself, and Love Thyself.
Other Epic Works (Density):

Infinite Kung-Fu
Bone
Scud: The Whole Shebang
A Drifting Life
Blankets
-------

About time to get back into the self-publishing business.

Especially with my writing and comics. I've got 20-40 pages of new comics material, 4 scripts,
and a massive 12 hundred plus pages of journals that are as yet unbound, and unprinted.

P a g e | 838

Saturday, September 7th, 2013,

Dual-Wielding. Much like John Woo, but with swords, that is probably my main specialty.
Fortunately no one in indie comics other than me really even bothers to attempt dual-wielding.
It's too hard, they say. Too complex. Too bad guy-ish. But dual wielding is like anime and kung
fu choreography. It IS those things. It looks cool. It's hard to draw. You need a reference to draw
it, a mirror most likely, and sabers to hold for reference. Most artists in animation make the dual
wielder the bad guy not because dual-wielding is a "villain thing" or "for show offs", but because
they don't know how to draw it to get it to appear on screen for longer than 2 minutes. It has to
do with laziness. Not morality. Studios don't want to put in the laborious, torturous animation
production storyboard and concept design and animator work that makes dual-wielding look cool
to begin with. Oh well, more for me.
Sunday, September 8th, 2013,
When starting your own channel, always ask "When?" "What time and on what days can people
watch the channel's programming?"
My horoscope said I will end up as one of the highest of all achievers in the entire country and
world.
This will include, literature, books, comics, manga, animation, TV, and anime. And businessmedia.
Monday, September 9th, 2013,
So today was the first day I created my first life master strategy:
Relocation Funding, and if negotiations with my parents fall through, it will be the Relocation
Funding Lawsuit.
Sometimes you can't rely on your parents good intentions or employment to fund relocation.
Sometimes it takes lawsuits revealing secret and hidden psychological abuse and malpractice
intel as testimony. Their trump card is sending me to the hospital. My trump card is calling
bullshit on them and making sure everyone knows what they're really like, crippling their social
relations.

P a g e | 839

The most enigmatic people I've ever known:

Glennis Sorrell
Nicole Cook
Thomas Romain
Katsuhiro Otomo
Dave Sim
Steve Blum
Jhonen Vasquez

Tuesday, September 10th, 2013,

I counted my most recent comic book page anthology. My clean page polish (for the most part)
anthology is now 56 pages long. 60 pages if you count all covers I've done, and way beyond 60 if
you count all the shit pages I've done! 60 pages is 3 whole issues. Jhonen did 7. I currently have
4 issues to go until I reach that point
If I compare the formatting of my ink layouts and print lengths to Jhonen's, I'm pretty sure I'm
finally catching up to him. That, or I'm entering my prime.
For his series, there's:
I Feel Sick: 2 issues, 40 pages
SQUEE: 4 issues, 80 pages
Johnny The Homicidal Maniac: 7 issues, 140 pages
In terms of what I'm going to do with my pages once I reach between 70 &120 pages that are
finalized in silhouettes and ink, I'm planning on paying my own publishing bills, and print up a
trade, then dividing each 20 pages up into an individual issue, or "one shot". It is and will be
awesome. I'm well on my way.
In terms of page output, I beat I Feel Sick. I'm soon going to beat SQUEE, and eventually I'll
beat the page rate of JtHM. I do still admire Jhonen, but I read in a famous creator interview that
you don't just admire your heroes. You have to compete against them in your head (if nowhere
else) believe you can surpass them. Normally I don't like being competitive, but I'm all for this.
Scott McCloud's magnum opus Understanding Comics and the representation of a
comics grammar is good Theoretically, but not much more than that. Comics
just happen, they are hard to plan. It's drawing in a bunch of panels at both
reduced and full size and cut and pasted size. Some are penciled, some are
drawn with ink pens, some are drawn with a sharpie marker. Some are copied.
Some are Photoshopped together on Photoshop and Digital Image Pro. Some use

P a g e | 840
thumbnails, some don't. Some use photographic reference. Some don't. Some are
redrawn. Some aren't. Comic book pages are not always drawn in sequential
story-centric order. Many pages are drawn out of order. And some pages are
revised and cleaned up. Some are left to rot and put in the scrap pile. Each
page holds his own unique challenge, artistically and linguistically, what
with speech bubbles and digital lettering.

Next year, 2014, will be the 10-Year Anniversary of the year I began work on End Times and
Parallax. You've come a long way, Mono Jubei baby!
When 2014 comes around, I'll most likely be at my comics making prime. I've finally found a
process, format, design pattern, panel & page layout, and genuine technique and method that
works. And my comics drawing rate is finally starting to rival my sketchbook drawing rate. I
sense things are winding down until drawings good comics isn't even a challenge anymore. And
with my website, web signal blocker, I can make the whole world slow down while I catch up to
speed on my own personal projects. If making comics suddenly turn into...not being a challenge
anymore, would I still pursue it. I suspect I would. If comics became as easy as screenwriting,
that in and of itself would be a miracle. The 10 years I spent working on Parallax were some of
the most isolating, torturous, and painful years of my life, particularly on a digital and social
level. But that's over with. Storm clouds are clearing, for now.
In terms of other anniversaries, 2013 will be Leiji Matsumoto's 60th anniversary of being a
manga-ka creator, writer, and artist. That is right: The man who inspired lots of artists in Eurasia,
such as Thomas Romain and Savin Yeatman-Eiffell. As well as myself!
I am deeply content with the state of affairs in my artwork. I'm happy with my art. I look at my
latest finished comic pages now, and I say "Very Good! Good Enough. Pass." My work is well
on its' way to being publishable. 1 step at a time. First step was sketching, Second step was
Character Design. Third step was concept art and amateur cartoons. Fourth Step was integration
of different fields, and the discipline, will power, hard work, diligence, and inability to give up
that it takes all of to make it real.
That figures. I attain a little bit of power in this world, and already there the possibility that
certain people and groups might be pursuing me for my power. I had no idea. If you attain
enough power there's no guarantee some people and groups and even groupies might pursue that
power you've achieved. But I don't draw for power, even if my power does increase every time I
draw.
Culturally speaking, and in a historic sense partially, France, the United Kingdom, and Russia
have achieved the closest thing to a Chinese or Japanese complimentary cultural counterpart we
will ever find in Western. Courteous, Literate, Polite, Disciplined, Honorable, Respectful.
Parisians, Brits, and Russians are all this and more. America lacks respect and maturity. Yes,
even in the 00 era, even AFTER 9-11, which supposedly brought America "closer together".
Yeah, if you're a white New Yorker maybe.

P a g e | 841

Thursday, September 12th, 2013,

Apparently, my current most popular website I own the rights to is currently worth around
$17,875, according to instica.com's instiplus URL Appraisal website That's the largest sum of
money anything I've ever owned has been worth. And to think, I could make 5-20 more sites just
like it!
And as it turns out, my most popular blog is worth $25,000
My net worth online and in business accounting, now sits at $43K. $43,000 richer. And it's all
because I chose to build up valuable digital real estate, and leverage the non-paying digital real
estate I did have to promote the real estate I do have. And this all is not even related to banner
ads or advertising. It has to do with general online brand equity.
I am currently in the process of negotiating with a client, a broker organization that buys and
sells websites. I've already submitted the beginning of my proposal. Now I wait for feedback, my
second proposal, and then some negotiation. I don't know how much the sale would bring in.
Possibly a lot, considering people ask for the same amount as my asking price all the time.
Right now I am in late night entrepreneur-business-sales mode. Focused solely on making that
sale, which, if negotiations go well, shouldn't be too hard to sell at the asking price, especially if
someone is doing the selling for me, who has a lot of knowledge, experience, and expertise in the
field of selling. Simple deal, right? But I do love to wheel me some deals.
Saturday, September 14th, 2013,
Finished airing The Maxx on ActionToonTV. I'm pretty sure a couple people actually watched
my broadcast. I almost always get a lot of blog, video, and linkage click-through whenever I post
"press releases" and notifications on twitter. It can be fun making people aware of my online
content and work in broadcasting and online publishing. I also broadcasted one of the better
episodes of Generator Rex a day or so ago. It's gonna take forever to compile the more epic of
the anime series I own. Still, so worth it though. All the shows I loved to discover growing up, I
now own on DVD and are going onto my PC hard drive, and can be uploaded or broadcasted to
be discovered by a whole new, more omniscient generation of viewers online. Delightful!
That's pretty cool. Take a DVD you own, scan it, and make a nifty online broadcasting operation
out of it. Sounds like good business to me. It's new media exploiting old media, when old media
simply remains tenaciously (and infamously) unprofitable, and refuses to take advantage of new
resources which could help it profit from itself. So some Video Jockey in his parents basement
on his PC does it for everyone. That would be me, in case you didn't guess. I'm a re-distributor or
vintage products of quality, that used to never be such ubiquitous products of the modern media
landscape. From my experience online, I realized vintage TV cartoons make for quite enjoyable
online broadcast time capsules. They're fun to open up like a Christmas Present on Christmas

P a g e | 842

Morning, and see what you get. And what did Santa Bring You Honey? Just a whole bunch of
wonderful, brilliant, inspired, deep, creative, well written, well designed, and imaginative TV
series from the past that just never got their moment in the sun because at the time, nobody tuned
in, and then all those series promptly disappeared from existence, almost entirely disintegrated
and dissolved by the Ravages of Time. Until I Brought Them Back. Maybe even from the TV
grave.
Online Franchises

Google Sites
Google Blogs
YouTube
UStream
Livestream
Showcaster
ActionToonTV
WCN/JM
Lulu.com/JM
Comixpress
Google Docs
@SplitAtomBoom
Spindack@AdultSwim.com
Novels
Comics
Streams
Scripts
Concept Art
Production Design
Costume Design
Lighting Design
Filmmaking
Short Films
Long Form Films
AMVs
Video Blogs
Photography

P a g e | 843

Let's talk about Volume(s)

The Encyclopedia Britannica (print version) is a nonfiction book series. It is comprised of
Volumes. Each book in one sense is a new Chapter in the Saga of Information and Journalism
Academia.
In terms of Publishing work, my writing is comprised of Volumes. Each new book is a chapter,
and each new chapter is a Volume. The Encyclopedia Britannica is always comprised of 20
books. 20 Volumes. I'm a quarter (1/4th) of the way there to rivaling such a vast epic scope. The
only writers who can rival an encyclopedia are Dave Sim, Katsuhiro Otomo, Leo Tolstoy, Ken
Wilber, Osamu Tezuka, Isaac Asimov, and Henry Darger. I have yet to decide whether I'll ever
reach that level. What I do know is this...
So far I've done the following: Works of Graphic Literature, authored by me, Joseph M. Alberts
1. Vol. I: Manifesto I
2. Vol. II: Manifesto II
3. Vol. III: A Commentary I
4. Vol. IV: Commentary I (print)
5. Vol. V: Commentary II (digital)
6. Vol. VI: Commentary III
7. Vol. VII: Hypergraphia I
8. Vol. VIII: Hypergraphia II
9. Vol. IX: Blogger (Printed)
10. Vol. X: Twitter (Printed)
11. Vol. XI: Essays, Scripts, Artwork, Comics, Series Bibles, and Fiction (Google Docs)
Graphic Literature is a name I made up to suite my style of page output. It's not entirely literary,
and it's not entire graphic. It dabbles in both, yet is not completely either. For those of us too
"lazy" to dream up and complete a finished story-driven graphic novel in our spare time.
I've achieved many of my most Hurculean Goals, including help a company earn a billion dollars
(YouTube), create a mythological genre of entertainment, and design the world and characters of
at least one Japanese anime.
Things I excel at:
Writing, Design, Planning, Analysis, Strategy, Tactics, Timing, Stealth, Speed, Invisibility,
Shadow Cloning, will power, patience, waiting.

P a g e | 844

Sunday, September 15th, 2013,

I'm always discussing some trend in my discussion, for the moment, or for the day.
Today:
This moment's topic: Graphic Literature. Creating and making Graphic literature in my
notebooks, pages, and sketchbooks.
Topic of the Moment: DC Nation. Seeing that CN dedicated an entire programming block to DC
Animated Universe programming, "Miguzi" and "You Are Here" style, does this indicated some
significance on the DC Animated Universe's part. Was DC Animated the Hannah Barbera of
fighting action cartoons and superhero adaptations, what with Spawn, Superman, Justice League,
Teen Titans, and Batman? Was DC the first to do dynamic fighting shows. I know their sharpie
marker approach influenced my style a lot, what with the heavy layers of black in my comics.
That's borrowed from Spawn, Batman, and The Maxx.
--------The Future of the Printing and Publishing Industry:
Key Points:

Lulu
WCN
Scanlations
Borders
Barnes & Noble / Books-A-Million
Manga
Amazon
The Internet
Comic Book Specialty Shops
Bookstores
Gender and Publishing
Online vs. Brick-&-Mortar
Self-Publishing
Webcomics
Retail and Profits
Novels and Art Books
OEL Manga
Manwha (Korean)
Where do most customers buy books?

P a g e | 845

Well, I am sort of happy with my career. I seemed to have mastered both comics and animation.
I mastered Comic Books! My sequential art is beautiful now. So I can either move onto
something new, or reaffirm my Mastery of the Field of Sequential Art. I haven't done a ton of
pages, but the amount of effort I put into it as work vocation is ungodly! No one can ever say I
never tried hard enough or didn't put enough hours in thinking about it. I'm more self-confident,
more patient, less needy, more disciplined, I have greater willpower and I don't procrastinate or
complain as much anymore. I don't believe in self-deception or self-pity. They're falsehoods. But
will anyone ever pay attention to me?
Monday, September 16th, 2013,
Technology will never be perfect. There will always be thinks to improve and toggle with. I'll
always have a business idea, and a way to improve existing technology and electronics. No
matter how perfect it gets there will always be something that's imperfect or missing.
Technically, I'm a self-made success story.
The experience I gained working as an unpaid employee for YouTube was invaluable. It taught
me all sorts of entrepreneurial internet business and technology fundamentals, and I got to walk
away from YouTube with the ability to start my own companies and inventions - Assuming I
have enough money saved up.
Nobody makes good black-&-white self-published indie comics anymore. Bone, Cerebus, and
Jhonen Vasquez are relics of the past. More and more comics are being published in color, and
not of the indie variety or spirit. At all. I'm the last of my kind. Indie comics got overshadowed
by the internet, manga, and webcomics. Webcomics and modern manga artists are so pretentious.
The raw arrogance of most of these artists disgusts me. I don't want to be anything like them, and
I don't want to act or draw like them, either. They're doing it wrong. It's just wrong to act all high
n' mighty, conceited, n' shit, like some asshole college sophomore anime "fan" who always
thinks he can do better at everything than anybody, when obviously, that ain't the case. And they
DEFINITELY can't do better at my thing than I can. 2000 and 2001 and 2002 were a good set of
years for black and white indie comics, what with Oni Press and SLG, but the internet deterred
interest in that brand of stylistic indie comics. They're no longer popular. Or hip. Or supported by
fans. I'm not the only one whose life has been disrupted by this shift in commerce from print to
digital. Comics just don't feel the same anymore. They don't feel unique or original like they
used to. I used to admire that crowd. But I don't admire what it's turned into. Without SLG and
Oni emphasizing the gothic, punk, counterculture, violence, and auteur angle, what is there to
buy and read. I know they still put out books, but I miss when they had famous names. However,
I'll still sign and promote with them if they want to publish me....Maybe. I need to think about it.
I don't know if and when I'll publish with a regular publisher. Currently I don't view my
sequential artwork as strong enough to stand side by side with their best stuff. It is stronger than
mine. I may be famous, but I don't draw comics at an Oni or SLG level for the most part. Not

P a g e | 846

yet. If I felt that I WAS at that level, I'd probably submit some of my pages to them. That goes
for all that I do. I'll ship when my pages reach maturity. Right now I'm just pretty good. Not top
notch.
Due to the prejudice, bullying, pain, harshness, abuse, and loneliness I suffered as a child, I seem
to have developed a craving for recognition, achievement, and acknowledgement.
------"Get your papers out of the way. We're babysitting tomorrow"
"Get your papers out of the way. I'm doing bills."
"Take your medicine. You know you'll end up in the hospital if you don't."
"We're not buying you ANYTHING!"
"You HAVE NO MONEY!!"
"NO, You CAN'T"
"I'm not gonna let you twist this around back on me."
----Wednesday, September 18th, 2013,
Today was my lucky day, in terms of networking. I started off by making a plan, overcoming my
fear and making a plan to call my ideal agency, CAA. They rejected me, citing their no
unsolicited submissions policy as the main reason" and suddenly that Busta Rhyme lyrics "Just
steadily were gettin rejected." and suddenly my fear evaporated. I felt like a telemarketer. Some
agencies pick up the phone with lighting speed. Others you have to wait for. I called at least 7
different Los Angeles, Hollywood Agencies' offices today. I started with cold calling the 4
Biggest, (Including CAA, ICM, and William Morris all of whom don't accept unsolicited
submissions), and moved down the list to smaller, more accessible agencies, until I eventually
stopped calling each agency and instead look at each of their official website. One of the phone
operators I spoke to recommended a secret technique: I checked out the Writers' Guild (of
America) Signatory Agents and Agencies Directory online. Turns out there's a fairly large
amount of agencies that accept unsolicited submissions, assuming you find the right agencies.
Bryan Johnston, and a substantial amount of members of the mainstream media, the the
American News at companies like NBC and Viacom, throughout the mainstream media, did at
times make several attempts to blacklist me as an alleged "young adult" "teenage" pedophile.
Police and neighbors upon getting wind of this information, attempted to bully, dispirit, and
harass me. And I'd get hate messages and libelous messages and defamation image look alikes

P a g e | 847

from people online in places like the Adult Swim Message Boards and DeviantART. Someone
also hacked my computer in an attempt discredit my media pursuits by making a "masturbation
sex tape" that they openly published on Facebook in yet another attempt to illegally and
underhandedly profit off of, discredit, and defame me and try to portray me as a deviant
infamous criminal. Most of it was done in a misguided attempt to profit off of my recently
established fame.The progressive tech industry, Google, and YouTube for the most part never
blacklisted me. They mostly just exploited my work ethic without telling me about it or
compensating/crediting me for it. They treated me with the most civility. It was mostly the old
media and Hollywood that pulled the defamation trump card stunt.
--------Truth is, in Hollywood, you won't get very far, if anywhere trying to sell yourself with anime and
manga the way kids do online. Hollywood doesn't do business with anime. They buy scripts and
movie option writes to things like novels, TV shows, and comics, and animated series. You can't
rely on the internet OR anime to sell yourself or your skills in Los Angeles. Mostly that element
of Japan gets ghetto-ized in America and relegated to late night TV, programming blocks of
imported shows from Japan, and Japan itself, which often hopes to sell its wares to the American
TV market through dubs and localized versions, which many anime fans hate and attempt to
show great displeasure for and discourage, not knowing that kind of thing does more harm than
good to anime. No one STARTS OFF in co-productions. That's only possible if you have A)
Fame, B) Money, C) Experience, and D) Connections. That's what my Franco-Japanese industry
insider veteran friend has told me, and he's actually quite successful in an of himself and has
some very high profile experience in the Japanese and French co-production and anime industry.
CAA is a great agency, but they're hard to get representation from. And with good reason. They
represent a large percentage of the biggest names in Hollywood.
There's more to TV-MA rated animation than shock value and being obscene/gross/white trash.

Blade Runner
R-Rated Disney
R-Rated Thomas Romain
Spawn
R-Rated Star Wars
R-Rated Steven Spelberg
Toonami
Adult Swim
R-Rated Cartoon Network

P a g e | 848

TV-MA animation seems to have in many instances become a self-cannibalizing parody of itself
in the U.S. Not so in Japan. There are ways to be masculine, mature, and grown up without being
gross and tastelessly vulgar.
2014 Horoscope Predictions

"You shall be in a powerful position"

"There is a strong chance of travel or you will be communicating regularly with people
from overseas"
"More responsibility"
"You will have the opportunity to move out of your neighborhood"
"You have the ability to work the room. Or the school. Or the company. Or the website.
Or the world."
"You will receive a new job offer you never would have expected"

Friday, September 20, 2013,

Visualization, Note Taking, the Law of Attraction, Inspiration, Motivation, Focus, and Planning
are all important parts of attaining and achieving success.
For instance, before I could write a script, I had to take a lot of notes.
Before I could submit a query to influential Hollywood agencies, I had to work up the courage to
call a few of them and investigate for advice about how to contact Hollywood literary agencies,
but before the query gets submitted, the script has to be at least half done (in my opinion of
course).
When I think art I think youth and competition.
When I think literature, I think refinement and networking.
Why is that?
I don't seem to work in comics, manga, or animation anymore. The best way to describe me
would be to say I'm working in Los Angeles, "indirectly". That is my current audience, and that
is who I do business with: Los Angeles. My best pro friend at the moment is Ramin Zahed,
Editor of Animation Magazine. I'm also friends with Steve Blum. If I get enough work in L.A.,
I'll move there. L.A. money does pay quite well. For a successful artist working in L.A., the
average is a high end five-or-six-to-seven-or-eight figure salary. All it really took was the right
motivation. Animation Magazine, anime dubbing studios (Bang Zoom!, Viz), comic book
publishers (SLG), movie studios (All of Them), animation studios (CN, Disney Feature, Warner,
Sony, Dreamworks), TV Studios (Cartoon Network, Fox,). That's all in L.A., with rare
exceptions like Atlanta (Turner Entertainment), Fort Worth (Funimation), and Tokyo. The best
thing you can do if you can't afford travel expenses and relocation budgeting, is to just hone your

P a g e | 849

skills in your house or in college until you DO reach that point and skill level, IN YOUR OWN
MIND, but only if you're truly being honest with yourself. If you're being honest with yourself
about the level of your abilities, chances are you already have a good intuitive idea of what
editors will think without even having to approach them before hand. If someone's good, if
they've got what it takes, chances are they'll know it.
I'm starting to realize I CAN have a career and life in L.A., and still be happy. The cool part is
I'm pretty sure that's part of how I can brand myself in terms of how I'm perceived: The cool
Lasseter-like Hollywood guy who's a lobbyist for anime and good anime projects and creators
like Thomas Romain or Savin Eiffell, and Katsuhiro Otomo, the way John Lasseter acts as a
lobbyist for Miyazaki.
Over the last 2 days, I've succeeded at compiling a list of phone numbers of 60 Los Angeles
literary Hollywood agencies and agents. All of them represent writers of various genres and
sorts and do a lot of selling on a writer's behalf once they've finished a killer script. That just
means there's 60 chances to win. I'm going to gather info on all of them, then do a multiple
submission, probably in 2014. Whenever I get more work on the script done on the typewriter I'll
probably get for my birthday on Nov. 17. I'm going to take a wild guess here and calculate that
I'll have myself a real life Los Angeles talent agent, assuming I can polish my script , rewriting it
patiently, and write a killer query and cover letter, and buy postage and packaging to send my
letters through the mail.
It is important to remember that when it comes to my money, no one is to be trusted. No one else
can be trusted with MY money. Plenty of other people (BUZZER: GOOGLE, YOUTUBE,
TWITTER) have mismanaged my money, and costed me a fortune. I lost a fortune to those
companies who swindled me out of my banner ad earnings. YouTube went out of it's way to
swindle me out of money by FUCKING WITH and NEGATIVELY MANIPULATING my
Adsense account, making sure "My broke ass don't get paid". And that is why I never trust others
with my money, even my own family and friends. I'm the only one who CAN be trusted.
I think I am the writer that Los Angeles has been sorely missing. I'm currently one of the most
noteworthy screenwriters working in Los Angeles TV animation today. I'm light years ahead of
Family Guy, The Simpsons, and South Park. My specialty is violent action, suspense, drama, and
Science-Fiction Fantasy. I've already authored numerous books before I got a green light on my
first screenplay. I'm an auteur with a keyboard. I bring literature, drama, and action into every
script I write. My stories are mature without being overtly vulgar. And my descriptions are
eloquent.
Plus, I'm getting a lot better at not procrastinating at re-writes.

P a g e | 850

There's an 80% chance I'll have an agent in the next two years.
And with an agent, getting rich is 20 times more likely
And there's a 90% chance I'll finish my first script (it's more than half way done anyway.

P a g e | 851

Chapter 22

P a g e | 852

Saturday, September 21st, 2013,

Horroscope For Today: "You are in the spotlight these days and you might as well enjoy the love and
appreciation that is coming your way. Instead of minimizing your accomplishments, be proud and stand
tall; bask in the glow of recognition for the work that you do so well -- even if you don't think it's such a
big deal. Although opening your heart to receive can be challenging, give yourself permission to feel the
warmth of admiration and respect."

Fights, Monologues, Narration, Description, Dialogue, Grammar and Syntax. These are the
elements of my spec that aren't entirely complete. Re-writing isn't completely fun, but it isn't
completely painful or boring either. So I'm off to a good start. Or was it "continuation".
I have around 13 pages to revise and rewrite, and around 7-10 that are probably fine just as they
are.
I'm actually working very hard in terms of screenwriting. Just editing and typing and scribbling
up a storm.
I'll often prepare for the task of making a book that tells a story by sketching up some "practice"
comic book pages, where I mainly focus on getting my ideas, concepts, and visual design
theories down on paper. I don't worry too much about the technical elements of my drawings
early on, just like I don't keep a lot of tabs on my spelling and punctuation early on, when I'm
laying down a first draft. I save details and technical elements for revision. My initial comics
page layouts resemble the camera framing of an early generation live action black-and-white
avant-garde short film, by filmmakers such as Maya Deren and Salvador Dali. Or French New
Wave. Films such as Meshes of the Afternoon, Man Bites Dog, and Le' Samorai. Along with
organic architecture and intuitive (fractal) coattail lines. I also like to add compositing, aspect
shots, and a genuinely large amount of close-ups in a literary filmmaking style similar to Hiroaki
Samura's usage of close-ups.
A script is an elaborate plot and story outline; and a comic book is an elaborate storyboard.
So pray to make it
Neva givin' up
Neva givin' in
Runnin in an'
Choppin Niggas Up
With the fire spirit of the dual blade

P a g e | 853

Sucka nigga ain't given up, neither am I

I've finished Anthologies For:

A Graphic Novel (140 pages)

A Comic Book One-Shot (20 pages)
An Art Book (284 pages)
A Novel (75 pages)
A Screenplay (98 pages)

Total Pages of Fictional Literature (Visual and Word-based): 617

In 2013, I completed:

A Novel (Fantasy SF Novel)

A Graphic Novel (Comic Book Trade)
A Screenplay (TV Show, Theatrical Film)

They're all in the 100 page or so range, with the exception of my novel. Now I refine and share.
The Berlin Wall of Completion has come crashing down around me.
That which does not kill me, only serves to make me stronger.
Sunday, September 22, 2013,
Daily, yearly habits build willpower.
If you can draw every single day for a year, after a year or two you'll be able to draw any time
and for however long you want, because the habitual rote behavior has been established. It's like
working out and sports.
Honestly. I DON'T KNOW where I'll be laying my head down to rest 20 years from now. Could
be a homeless shelter. I doubt it would still be here.

P a g e | 854

Turn weakness into strength:

Problem: I'm a mediocre artist, not a fine artist. I'm better with words than art.
Solution: So focus on words and writing, not reading and drawing.

Problem: I don't look good on camera.

Solution: Then don't BE on camera.

Problem: I only care about quantity, not quality.

Solution: Fuck quality. Do as much work as I can for as long of a period of time as I can.

Problem: Studios want to jump the gun on optioning my work.

Solution: Let them make their little shitty-ass poorly made Hollywood movies. Not my
problem.

Problem: I have no friends around anymore, and everyone abandoned me, especially my
parents and brother.
Solution: Use that angry passion as fuel for my creative work.

Okay. I seem to be doing well. I've conquered and dominated and created a monopoly with
Google on the internet. My next task will be considerably more difficult. But my next couple of
goals are going to blow everyone away too if I succeed at them. And all I need is a few lists, an
eloquent personality, and a lot of hard editing work.
Movies are impractical to watch (they're two hours), and they're impractical to make (they cost
millions of dollars, involve tons of people and epic resources, and are 2 whole hours in length for
the most part
TV shows are impractical to make, yet they're very easy to watch half the time, unless they're
offensive. In which case they're neither practical to watch or make.
Why is there so much modern media emphasis on humiliation, and embarrassment,
inappropriateness, and awkward or awkweird, and dishonor, and people disgracing and
ostracizing themselves from their communities. Is that really how life is nowadays. If so I must
have been stuck indoors for longer than I initially thought.

P a g e | 855

Tuesday, September 24th, 2013,

I've got four separate worlds, or realms of existence and spiritual worlds to contend with:

Life in a house, my parents house, life in typical suburbia.

Life as a media celebrity and figure, online, and on TV, live and exaggerated
Life as a conduit to the spiritual and intellectual realm and world
Life as an auteur, creator, author, designer, filmmaker, storyteller, and artist.

I've written fight scenes before, and I read them all today to review them. Noticed a couple
things. The fighting itself flows, but feels disconnected, like a puzzle put together the wrong
way. It distracts from the flow of the story. Action and Fighting Cartoons are better if the visuals
are mapped out visually, in visual format. Even by the writer. Panels of storyboards and image
boards can be as simple as storyboards, as layered and technical as a comic book, or as detailed
and moody as fully or digitally painted concept art sketch to set the mood of the plot, or scenes
of the story. But that requires character design, layout, and production design or art direction, as
well as separate write ups for description and dialogue.
Wednesday, September 25th, 2013,
I'm a powerful creator. I have a powerful comics animation anime manga franchise concept.
Now all it needs is a powerful agency, a powerful team of artists, and a powerful publisher or
studio to seal the deal. Nothing too out of the ordinary. It's Pure Power Fantasy. The theme here,
is Power, just as it was with Marvel, Cerebus, and Akira.
I'd love to sell my concept to Marvel. DC would work too, but they're not as open to new ideas
and franchises they didn't create way back, in the 40s, 50s, 60s, and 70s.
Still I can help but think Disney and Me, or Marvel and Me, or Dark Horse and Me, or
LucasFilm and me would be a mad powerful combo. We will be Powerful Together.
With the help of the new school comic book agencies, it's seems to be getting easier to find work
without having to hire or find everyone yourself. They do that for you.
Thursday, September 26th, 2013,
Currently, the thing I want more than anything else in the world is Powerful-Epic Superhero
artwork to go with my Mega Powerful Writing and Storytelling. Like Fireblade, but with Art and
Writing, not Script & Voice Acting (Steve Blum). I want to be like Jhonen, Tim Burton, etc, and
collaborate with artists who do powerful sequential art and covers straight from the pages of
Marvel, Image, DC, and Dark Horse.

P a g e | 856

Even though I can be very chatty and outgoing, and have wanderlust, my adoptive father is a
liability. He's a tad bit on the aggressive, anti-social, and demented side. But a lot of people
already know that. That my adoptive father is a social and professional liability to my career.
Talked to a comic book agent for the first time today. Pretty much confirmed all my suspicions.

No comic book is sold with just a script and no art.

Never set yourself up to work with people you don't get along with. Like Cary or
Andrew.
All the pros are on DeviantART, not just trolls.
You're going to toil in the pro-leagues of animation and/or comics doing grunt work you
despise for at least 2 decades or more before you get a book that's not online only that
anybody reads.
No one is interested in concept art in and of itself. They want finished books. Finished
pages.
Yes, everyone IS very mean at the top.

I'm good, but I'm no match for a 1,000,000 competing artists. Online and off! Today I realized
I'm a bigger celebrity than I thought. Because there are probably over 1,000,000 OTHER artists I
don't even know and have never met for the most part, many of whom would gladly stab another
guy in the back to reach the top of the totem pole.
All this verbal, emotional, and antagonistic squabbling and yelling with my parents on an hourly
basis 24/7/365 is leaving me feeling exhausted and beat up. It's draining all my energy to get
work done. I don't always get the opportunity for actual real rest, pleasure, and relaxation. If
only I had money, I could afford to relax. I don't know how I'm going to survive parents like
mine for the next 20 to 30 years. Or even 1 to 2 years. It's a daunting task trying to deal with
these evil, deminishing, belittling, draining, selfish, mean, self absorbed adults that think the
whole world revolves around their little social lives, small as they are. Small as they are, they
think they're all that. It takes the fun out of life, and makes life a fight for survival. I swear to god
they literally make me want to kill myself. I can't deal with the stress their arrogance and Cary's
Alzheimer's Dementia is putting me through. If I can survive all this, I'll be a free man. I'll have
freedom and peace. But they don't want that to happen! So fuck em'. The weight of the world,
society, culture, and nature is on my shoulders. Therapy didn't help. It made things worse. I'm at
a dead end. Everyone wants to rescue me from these evil individuals and wisk me away to
paradise. But no one has a real plan. If only.

P a g e | 857

"You have tried your best to please everyone, but it just isn't happening. No it just isn't
happening."
"Buy yourself a ticket and get on a train, cuz this is Fucked. Up. Fucked. Up."
"You are a Black. Swan. Black. Swan. Cuz this is Fucked. Up. Fucked. Up."
-Thom Yorke
"Black Swan"
But I don't have any money! Could you buy me a ticket?...maybe. Pretty please???
God does not like me very much. He never blesses me with material wealth. And bankrupts me,
and forces me to live with my abusive foster father and mother. Enduring continual dishonors to
my royal and revered heritage.
----------------------Friday, September 27th, 2013,
I might, (I repeat, MIGHT) be "resuming" (or should I say Restarting) my education at the Art
Institute of Fort Lauderdale. I've grown to resent both Casselberry and my own fame and social
standing so much that I'm beginning to suspect even my WORST incidents in Ft. Lauderdale,
Florida would be better than this, than here. Phil inspired me. I don't stand a chance of finding
real employment. The next best thing to driving and getting a job would be moving back to my
former stomping grounds in Fort Lauderdale, and continuing to further my education. I'm not
giving up, even when everyone else did. Something tells me maybe I should live in some other
place than Sunrise Hall. If I do return to Fort Lauderdale, it wouldn't be because I'm a "celebrity"
or I "want to get recognized". I just want to be happy. Fort Lauderdale is a Happy place. Happier
and more Peaceful than many places in Florida. There's nothing more I can do for Casselberry.
Well beyond time to move on. I'm patient. I can wait for an opportunity if necessary. But I'm not
staying here anymore. Not if I get the funding, which I will be actively seeking out.
Truth be Said, there truly is no hope in webcomics, comics, manga, anime, or animation. The
industry's massive overcrowding of wannabe talent and ruthless hypercompetitive know it alls
have doomed modern comics and animation to be machine without a soul. Fuck that, man. Screw
that. I'm going back to living my life on a smaller level. I'm going back to Fort Lauderdale,
where I actually had some Real Power.
If there's a way to cash in on my engineering and computer-internet science and entrepreneurial
abilities without the proverbial legal chink in the armor (attempts to discourage me from making
money by fraudulently bringing up copyright violations and claims, something very infamous
and controversial on the anime companies behalf), then I will eventually find it, and completely
cash in on it, which I will do, and which I am beginning to do.

P a g e | 858

I invented and pioneered the current state of online video with uploading, Flash, and YouTube.
The medium itself of Online Video, which I pioneered is currently worth $8-$10 billion. It is
estimated to reach a total market value of $37 billion by 2017. My brand makes even more
money than Mark Zuckerberg's brand. His brand is social media. Mine is online video. I'm the
Flint Lockwood of online video. I think that's the whole point. It's not exactly a secret or highly
contested fact. As a matter of fact, by now it's biblical truth with many insiders. Henry Ford had
the automotive assembly line manufacturing industry. Philo T. Farnsworth had Television (thank
god), Ted Turner had Cable and TV. Bill Gates had software. Google has information and online
search. Mark Zuckerberg had social media. I have Online Video. I have a stake in all of this. It
may not pay yet, but turnabout is fair play, as we all know.
So if I had to pick my most successful job title, I'd say I'm an online video entrepreneur, in the
tradition of Ted Turner and Sean Akins.
Saturday, September 28th, 2013,
Being the founder of the online video market has established me as one of the 10-40 most
influential people in the entire world. My invention of online video is almost as ubiquitous online
as Google is just about.
For instance,
A search query for "Google" online will return a total of 11 billion results.
A search query for "online video" will return a total of 4 billion results.
It's nice having an online and technological net worth of $4 billion, as I do.
Sunday, September 29th, 2013
2006 as a year, and 22 as a mystical luck number, have a lot of importance to me.
I was 22 years old when:

I made it
YouTube hit the big time and entered the spotlight
YouTube was sold for 1.6 billion to Google
YouTube won Time Magazine's Person of the Year
You Tube was named "Invention of the Year by Time Magazine"
YouTube went from thousands of hits to hundreds of billions
The Online Video Market and Industry was created

These are things I built, at the peak of my form as a Master Builder

P a g e | 859

My filmmaking production and animation/comics production style is modeled after 2 things:

Sagittarius, and Japanese filmmaking.
Meaning: Create illusions of grandeur utilizing a nonexistent budget. In other words, how pretty
can we make the vision and product look, for free.
The future is Me. I am The Future. Live Broadcasting of Anime and Action is Me. I am Live
Broadcasting of Anime and Action.
Live Online Video (Action Cartoon) / Brand New Genre and Medium [Livestream]
Why do people care so much about "how much money the other guy's making"? That's kind of
stupid. It's not my job to care how much the other guy is making each month. I DON'T CARE
how much you or the other guy is making. I care about how much I'M MAKING, or how much I
have. For that is something I can control.
Tuesday, October 1st, 2013,
Awesome. I've just discovered some new stuff. Plex, a streaming media server that streams my
video files in my collection on both my TV Roku and my computer.
And also, I just found out I can read MangaFox on my cellphoone. So much unlicensed manga,
so little time. There's also anime streaming sites I want to put on my cellphone, like Neon Alley
and Crunchy Roll.
Wednesday, October 2nd, 2013,
Who is my audience? Me, (first and foremost. I am the quality judge. Peggy, Chris, Stonergoth,
Blum, Ramin. Online: Twitter, Pixiv, Blogger, WCN.
I'm not making my work for Hollywood, or L.A., or Celebrity Culture, or the News, or the
mainstream media.
I've realized you're nobody unless somebody likes you and you're liked by the ones you love. My
audience is never harsh. My audience is the people I always love and the people who always love
me. Fame has very little to do with it. As does culture, age, gender, race, or status.
You can literally drive yourself crazy trying to track down an audience, and the audience that
makes you commercial, you'll end up hating for the rest of your miserable life if you pander to
them. So therefore pick a small, intimate audience of people you mostly if not entirely know and
trust. With a million people competing against me in the comics arena, literally, I don't stand a
chance. Not a fucking chance. So I'm going to have to re-adjust my view of what it means to
have what you need: A small audience who gives you honest and direct feedback.

P a g e | 860

Thursday, October 3rd, 2013,

Cartoon Network is more of a network system of technology more than ever before. That and a
social and cultural network. The Network in Cartoon Network is now quite literal.
Friday, October 4th, 2013,
I want to finish my life and career as an icon, or perhaps become a cultural icon through
posterity. I know I want to be recognizable to the general public, and well off financially. And
growing up I always wanted to be famous when I got older. Iconic pop culture keeps my
attention like few things. Just the mythology of it all can be pretty fun and provide hours worth
of storied entertainment.
I want to overcome and tear down as many boundaries and limitations as much as I want to build
bridges to new territory. From speculative software to Franco-Japanese comics and animation.
I've been waiting YEARS for this day. Finally (finally!) online writers of comics fan culture are
discussing the storytelling devices just now known and referred to as "decompression" and the
"aspect montage". These techniques have been around forever, but it used to be the only people
you'd see discussing topics like storytelling grammar would be Scott McCloud in his academic
magnum opus series Understanding Comics, from which a lot of this current discussion derives. I
strongly believe, and always have believed, that the best indie and manga, and "indie manga" and
"gekiga", or "drama pictures" can and should utilize copious amounts of decompression and
aspect montages. All the greatest modern comics tell stories that way. Europe and Asia do it the
best. But as this recent online discussion and debate signifies, its frequency seems to be
increasing in North American comics, too, what with writers like Brian Michael Bendis and
artists like Dave Sim, Genndy Tartakovsky, and Frank Miller.
So what is gekiga? What is an aspect montage? What is decompression? And how can they
benefit my storytelling style?
Wikipedia defines comics decompression as comics that place a greater emphasis on visuals, less
emphasis on dialogue, a greater amount of character interaction and drama, and slower moving
plots that can often linger in one or a few spots for a long time over many pages.
Aspect Montage is self explanatory if you know what an aspect-shot or aspect-to-aspect
transition and an editing montage is.
Gekiga is a Japanese form of storytelling meaning literally, Dramatic Pictures. So if a comic
book uses a lot of portraiture, close ups, emotions, and drama, it would qualify as gekiga.
I aspire to create comics that combine all three of these elements, not just because I'm good with
these kinds of things, but because I can no longer afford to buy new comics for a while outside of
webcomics and scanlations. So I'm going to have to do what the pioneers did and manufacture

P a g e | 861

my very own entertainment on paper, to satisfy my own need for something to read. I can't afford
to buy new comics, I'm too poor for that, so I've got to make my own, to entertain myself, and
maybe 5 other people.
My neighbors are definitely weekend bullies. Bullying people because of their sexual orientation,
for "being gay" or whatever. That's just the most horrible kind of person in the entire world: The
"racist, bigoted neighbor". It's like living next door to a Klansman, or a Neo-Nazi. It's surprising
to know racists still exist, especially "across the fence", in a neighborhood that's mostly uppermiddle class. Too bad they're all going to Hell to Burn. Gay people are human too. And it's
illegal to harass and bully someone because of their sexual orientation. Some people are so full
of themselves there's no room for anyone in their own minds but themselves. It's incredibly
difficult to tolerate that level of ignorance and bigotry. Florida the Racist Bigot American Fucker
State. Why are Spaniards so homophobic in general anyway?
------------------No one else is capable of making
Entertaining myself is the key to creating general entertainment. Drawing sequential art for
myself is the secret to fueling the sequential art market.
Another layer of pacing elements I want to layer my sequential art with, would be that
"Documentary" or "cinema verite" feel, pioneered by the French. That Man Bites Dog or Blair
Witch type of feeling where a camera with an unsteady hand is tagging along with the actors.
I prefer to call it "time realism" or "pacing realism", because A) I'm not very good with textural
and static realism, and B) Time, Editing, and Pacing Matter. It's important to experiment with
pacing and time, and see if you can and are better off making it "realistic" or "abstract" in
relation to the narrative storytelling artform.
Bruce Lee once said, "If you can't punch, compensate by Mastering Legwork". Pull a slight of
hand. Be so good at abstract design that no one will even bother to look or call into question that
you never mastered realistic textures. But you have to have something else, some other element
that's an equal enough element and ingredient to distract your audience with your strengths and
draw their attention away from your weaknesses.
But even weakness and vulnerability has it's uses, like that book Daring Greatly tells us.
On Cohesion and Coherence:
No matter what object your trying to draw, no matter how diverse your style is, no matter what
kind of book you're writing. If you world, your characters, and the structure of your page
structure doesn't have cohesion. If it doesn't have a model-sheet-like ability to be cohesive,
unified, and all fit together cohesively, if each individual panel and page doesn't have cohesion,

P a g e | 862

if it doesn't look like it fits together, aesthetically it won't work. Because the human brain
responds to cohesion. Our aesthetic cognizance response to cohesion and cohesiveness. Without
cohesion, you've got a squiggle, not a straight line, or even a curve. Without cohesion, you've got
sloppy, unsteady work. Without cohesion, you've got an aesthetically unappealing mess on your
hands. There's got to be a cross medium, cross media consistency there. Good visual comics
style Have Cohesion. Without it, they're pretty damn ugly.
I really do gotta make it to the eternal party of success and rock & roll. One of these days.
Whether it's in art or writing or tech. I don't care. As long as I make it to the other side somehow,
I'll be content for the rest of my life. I'm not there yet. I am still mocked and disrespected and
underpaid. And nobody writes any articles about me. And I don't have a car, license, or
girlfriend. Or a house. Or a job. Or a credit card. I have NOTHING!
"I am my father's son, he's a phantom a mystery and that leaves me NOTHING!!!!!"
Saturday, October 5th, 2013,
I'm going to have to start devising a literary review and publishing strategy, where I go out of my
way to get assorted editors and proofreaders opinions of my book series. But I'm going to have to
think of a plan of how I'm going to do such a thing and organize it, as it does seem quite
complex, and because they're bound, printed cohesive books, I've got more options than I would
otherwise. For instance, I wouldn't need to hand in a manuscript. I could just mail in a boxed
book, to duplicate or get reviewed. Do I need an editor, or do I need a proofreader. Probably a
proofreader. But I need a publisher or printer to duplicate my book-manuscript. Especially since
I lost the manuscript I wrote the soft copy with.
"But I want to write a book, too!" whined Seth.
"Really. Okay. Then WRITE one. It's not THAT hard," replied Joseph.
Why I Succeeded at Writing Books but Failed at Drawing Comics
It's all in the mentality. You have to be driven and patient with your work schedule, not dynamic.
You can't make a big deal out of what you're doing, whether it's writing a book or drawing
comics. If you DO make much ado about your process, you'll be burned out in one tenth the time
and give up or run out of energy, and easily become discouraged. Drawing comics should be a
hobby and compulsion not a loud, attention getting chore.
If you want to succeed at drawing comics, DON'T put too much thought / talk / ado / hype into
it. Like Nike says. Just Do It.

P a g e | 863

Zen Skills
"Being vs. Having"
Your greatest skills are the skills you are. Not the skills you possess or have, like property or
something.
It's not about HAVING or GETTING skills, as though they are material objects. Skills are not
material objects. The process isn't a material object. Process is a state of existence, a way of
living. It is Zen.
The product that results from your skills should be regarded as unimportant. An after thought.
Even completed manuscripts comics and books should be regarded this way. It's more important
to live in and hone your skills as a way of life in the moment.
Real art is a form of unseen performance athletics. This is what the artists sees and feels. This is
how to not GET discouraged is to think of drawing or writing as an improvisational athletic
performance process.
------I do tend to overuse the new skills hobbies, theories, ideas, and concepts that I like. That's how
you can tell I REALLY like something, if you see me do it a million times a day.
Monday, 1:06 a.m., October 7th, 2013,
I've been too selfish with my celebrity associates, and therefore I've risked losing them. I need to
be more considerate of their need. I don't want it to just be about THEM helping ME. What do
they really get out of it. I'm using up their time if I treat them just like a therapist and nothing
else. I sent courtesy emails to 2 of my most famous friends, Thomas and Steve. I do honestly
hope they let me know if I can help them out, or assist them in their work or life. I want to be a
Thomas Romain and Steve Blum guy who helps them. Everyone asks Steve and Thomas to do
things, so I got to think smarter and be more of a helper. I want to know if I can help them, even
if I'm of a lower stature. I was asking too much of them. That can make a celebrity feel burdened
by you if you only want to ask them what they can do for you and never the other way around.
I'm interested in hearing their input on that. I hope they contact me, eventually.
Being an American artist and sketching Japanese anime and manga drawings is the new normal.
Anime-influenced comic books is the new normal. That's how everyone draws now. It's normal.
It's then new status quo to draw in the anime style on paper with a pencil or ink. Definitely
makes things a bit easier to get done when it's like that, when it's not in the minority. With
American artists my age, anime is the majority. Not the minority.
Teachers and parents hated rock and roll too, when the Beatles first got big. Now rock music is
so ubiquitous, it influences almost all other genres.

P a g e | 864

Education Received, Schools I've attended:

Stanford (Coursera Online Lectures) (Palo Alto, Silicon Valley)

Valencia Community College (Orlando)
Crealde School of Art (Winter Park)
Art Institute of Ft. Lauderdale (Bachelor of Science, Media Arts and Animation)
Private Coaching with Philip Ferretti

Schools I've been interested in

CalArts (California Institute of the Arts)

The School of Visual Arts
Ringling School of Art and Design
Manga University
Joe Kubert School of Cartooning and Graphic Design

I'll be continuing to pursue education, both online and off, for a long time.
I am many things. But I am not a fool. And I don't suffer fools gladly, either.
I'm taking online classes in entrepreneurship, business, and computer science, online, at
Stanford, the Second Most Prestigious Business and Engineering University in the World,
behind The Ivy League of Harvard University. Not bad. At this point in my life and career, I
would have expected to be bragging a whole lot more about my prestige than I have been. I don't
know why that is. I've got a lot to brag about, but that's no reason to brag and boast. Just do your
job. That's really all you have to do. That's rewarding enough. No reason to alert the masses.
But it took me a long time to get here. To get to this point. Yes, I'm a "genius". So, what?
Fanmail:

YouTube
Twitter
DeviantART
Gmail

Tuesday, October 8th, 2013,

I've recently done a page count. I've left behind a total of 5,000 pages of journal writings.
In the last 10 years, I've authored 11 manuscripts, and 5,000 pages. Not bad. I have no clue what
the word count is.

P a g e | 865

Nobody says you can't solicit your product to your YouTube subscribers. Or twitter followers.
Solicitation List:

YouTube Channel
YouTube Subscribers
Twitter Feed
Twitter Followers (Direct Messages)

Wednesday, October 9th, 2013,

Working on my multimedia projects (Thunder-Lightning) and running
(Streamwave) from an office in Orlando, Florida.

my company

Booyah! I will be working in an office downtown. Has accommodations and everything.

Leasing an office in Downtown Orlando will be like what I'm doing now and what I got to do at
the Art Institute and Sunrise Hall, but the Ambiance will be 100 time better. In a way, this is an
experimental business venture. Cab fare is around $35 bucks to get there.
This is right up my alley. Having an office with an Orlando Address will make things that much
easier. I won't want to come home
I'll be accumulating savings starting in December of 2013 to cover lease.
I've wanted to work in an office (either national or local) for my entire life! Now that dream
might be coming true!
Orlando is as good a city as any to set up shop in.
One question I keep going over: what kind of work will I primarily do there? How will I spend
my time. I'm not planning on just goofing off or going on vacation. I really am planning to get

P a g e | 866

some serious work done, even if it's just write more pages and draw more comics. It's a quieter
atmosphere, and I can socialize with colleagues. From different industries.
Still, being my own employer and working in a professional grade office complex. That's a life
goal achieved right there. Best case scenario, I make some new friends and contacts at work.
My ripping company will be comparable in impact to Xerox one day.
I can do and have done the following things with video on a computer

Copying
Inventing
Engineering
Speculating
Duplicating
Converting
Extracting
Broadcasting
Communicating
Selling
Exploiting
Interfacing
Re-Routing
Cross wiring
Uploading
Downloading
Profiting
Showcasing
Manufacturing
Emailing
Burning
Ripping

Friday, October 11th, 2013,

Perfectionism is flawed. It's a flawed way of thinking. I no longer want to BE a perfectionist.
The only reason a person would be a perfectionist would be because they want to put up a wall
of "perfection" to keep out criticism, attack, controversy, infamy, notoriety (this time I wrote it
the RIGHT way) and judgement.

P a g e | 867

Habit [as in the habit of drawing comics for enjoyment and out of habit] is only partially a
conscious act. Habit is built on repetition, and an initial moderate amount of aggressive pursuit.
The beginning can be tough. It's like remembering to shower and brush your teeth, and work out
on the treadmill and exercise. It's never easy in the beginning, but with enough consistent
repetition as part of a training regiment over time, it becomes so easily accessible and influential
in your life, you won't remember what it was like before you formed that more recent habit.
There's no cut off age of when it is and is not acceptable to create new (yet long lasting) habits.
Habits like drawing close-up panels, for three panels a page.
Saturday, November 12th, 2013,
One of the coolest things about manga is the scaling proportions. How "BIG" the drawings feel
in panels throughout comic book pages in Japan. One way to reach 6,000 comic book pages very
"easily", more craftily, and with less effort, is to do, A) A whole armada of Giant Close-Ups the
way Dave Sim and Katsuhiro Otomo do, or B) Draw EVERY panel on a "BIG" Scale.
Panel 1) BIG Close-Up of shouting, enraged open mouth Colonel Face.
Panel 2) BIG Close-Up of Handgun Firing
This is the script for tomorrow's page.
Part of how to get more panels out of a book isn't just to draw everything moving slower with
more panels closer to animation frames, but also, Drawing Lots of Big, Giant Close-Ups, and
drawing EVERTHING in that Universe on a BIG Giant Scale. That's how Katsuhiro does almost
every drawing. So be like Otomo: Draw EVERYTHING REALLY BIG ON LARGE SCALE
PAPER, Especially BIG FACES AND CLOSE-UPS, with the potential exception of
Architecture and Costume details. Drawings' proportions are defined by the feelings they invoke.
If a drawing FEELS BIG AND HUGE, it IS BIG AND HUGE.
Draw EVERYTHING BIG AND ENORMOUS, on a large scale, and it will "feel more epic".
Everything EXCEPT thumbnails and prelims, which is where an artist generates panel
compositions ideas, with at least 6-12 panel thumbs per page.
Gee. Things sure do get a lot easier when certain people stop attempting to win by turning
everybody against you anymore.
Sunday, October 13th, 2013,
Finished formatting the manuscripts for 4 books recently. That went surprisingly well.
Business real estate is...Not as challenging as people make it out to be.

P a g e | 868

Monday, October 14th, 2013,

Okay Nicole. You win. Because You're a super-nice person and you've been super awesome to
me for my whole life, I'm promoting you from girlfriend to wife status. Well, in my mind
anyway. Now we are husband and wife, long distance. NICE! I love Nicole's photography. She'd
make a great publicist for me, what with publicity photos. She could make me look really
awesome on film! It's so nice I actually know where she is and what she's doing now: Running a
photography business in Portland, Oregon. Those Oregon Night Photos remind me of Sunrise
Hall, which is where the two of us met. Damn, Nicole really brings out the romance in me,
doesn't she.
Aww. Shucks. I know I'm not actually one of the Power Players and Who's Who of the
International Business Community and Industry, but it's nice to get an email that says I am.
I'm a Democrat, but I ain't for what's been happening lately. I think the whole health care or
"Obamacare" debate is stupid. Is this really what we want to waste our time complaining about
on TV or whatever? The only people getting pissed off about it are rich, white middle-to-upperclass Republican males. No one else gives a fuck about it, whether it's justified or not. Health
Care does kind of feel more accessible than before. But I've always had health care, ever since
2000 or so. The government shutdown feels like a political temper tantrum. Not something I
necessarily care about one way or the other. And I'm a democrat. If this country keep getting
caught up on money, what's going to happen to the homeland security budget and system? You
mean to tell me we're really just going to let the middle east or North Korea do and say whatever
it WANTS while we make ourselves look stupid?
Thursday, October 17th, 2013,
That's amazing. I may have finally found an independent comic book community, in Central
Florida, that's local. It's a local school and workshop, much like Crealde, that specializes in
teaching sequential art and cartooning. Much of the faculty has mainstream publishing
credentials, and has taught at SVA (School of Visual Arts), where Phil studied before he worked
on Doug and Beavis and Butt-Head, and taught at the Disney Institute. FINALLY! There's a
local comics community. And it's around a 3-hour drive from my house. That's the closest any
cartooning community has ever been to my house, which is probably a good sign. They also do
consulting, which is basically how I discovered the comics workshop. I'm looking forward to
this.
For a long time now, I've suspected I failed at drawing certain pages in comics not because I
lacked talent. I have talent. I just need guidance. I think consultation on my sequential art will
help productivity.

P a g e | 869

So there's some new words entering my personal lexicon:

Sequential Artists Workshop (SAW)

The Sacred Heart of Jesus (Father's Epitaph)
Speed in Movies and TV

I've recently discovered how entertaining DVDs and TV Cartoons and Action Movies are if you
watch them at regular speed initially, but then rewind to the beginning and fast forward through
all the scenes with motion. It makes fast cartoons seem even FASTER! Everything moves at the
speed of light. Thank God for the Fast Forward Button. Anime is also very fast at times. It's just
really awesome how stuff goes by so fast, your mind doesn't even have time to register what you
eyes are seeing whizzing past your line of sight. INTENSE!

P a g e | 870

Friday, October 18th, 2013,

Seminole, Orange, Gainesville.....

Seminole, Orange, Gainesville.....

P a g e | 871

I've seen the future. In the future, there will be these huge databases on our PC hard drive,
streaming media players, and online. And on those databases will be thousands upon thousands
of shows and every episode of those shows that ever got made.
Friday, October 18th, 2013,
Apparently, I've got a whole bunch of relatives in my birth father's family I never knew about. I
actually have some of their names from Glenis' obituary.
Names:
People Related to Glenis Ralph Sorrell:
Ottis Sorrell, Goldie Geesey Sorrell, Donald Loretta Sorrell, Bill Gayle Sorrell, Laura Perham,
Wanda Edwards, Sharon Kevin Lovejoy, Debbie Ken Doyen, Dennis Debbie Sorrell, Tina Jim
Temmen, Theresa Sorrell
All these people are technically in my biological family tree. I'll still care for and care about my
adoptive family (I don't see why not), but it certainly is nice discovering extra members of my
family tree.
I come from a very British family. More than 60% of my aunts, uncles, brothers, and sisters on
my biological father's side have English last names.
My favorite Brits:

My Family
William The Conqueror
Harry Potter
JK Rowling
Sir Tim Berners-Lee
Thom Yorke
Radiohead
Jamie Hewlett
Tim Curry
Darwin
Tolkien
Tim Burton
Ridley Scott
Nick Hornby

P a g e | 872

It would probably best not to call attention to myself as a diplomat. But that might not be an easy
thing to do in "Casselberry" on "Queen Elaine Dr." The street I live on is named after a British
person.
Many of the streets in my neighborhood ("Camelot") are named after early members of the
British Monarchy. That would be MY ancestors. To think how many people around here drive
their cars on streets with that kind of name, without even knowing the connection. I guess it's
kind of like being related to Martin Luther King, if you consider what kind of streets are named
after Martin Luther King. Essentially it's the same principle. Mighty brought low, I guess.

P a g e | 873

END TIMES
Friday, October 18th, 2013
Survival Necessities

Clothes. Thermal layering. Putting Tee shirts on top of shirts, sweaters, and jackets, and
jeans on top of khaki shorts.
Cell Phone, Cell Phone Charger. Travel Lightly, Electric outlet for PC and Charger.
Don't forget my passport. And Money

I'm going to be traveling for a while. I'm going to Europe whenever I have enough saved up to
afford it. I'll be traveling across the Atlantic to get to Britain first, and then Europe, later. I don't
really have a destination in particular other than obvious tourist locations. France, Italy, Berlin,
Netherlands.
Travel the World through Eurasia for a few years, documenting my travels by laptop,
sketchpads, and notebooks I buy in art stores in Europe, with pens and blue and lead pencils I
buy over there too, and taking pictures from my phone. Sounds like a lot of fun, to say nothing of
my purpose in life. I am most peaceful when I travel late at night on the open road, or walk the
open countryside. That seems a lot better to me than winning an award or getting and staying
rich. Even if I was rich, I'd probably just buy DVDs and Roku apps and books, comics trades,
music albums, international comics, and anime DVDs and episode downloads, and store it all on
my numerous computers, both desktop and laptop. I don't have much use for money other than
that.
My travel journal scrapbook memoirs would make an AWESOME manuscript! People love to
read and look at findings and images from international travel. It would be like the notebooks I
already fill in Seminole County, FL, in the United States. End Times and Parallax: International
Edition. My little 6,000 page project might just grow to expand worldwide.
My newest consultant-teacher, Tom, is my most famous private teacher and mentor yet. He's
more famous than all my other local teachers combined, so I've got to keep that in mind. He's the
founder of the workshop, and he has an ongoing multi-book comic of his own too, Hutch Owens,
apparently, which is pretty well known in the indie comics community. I've got a lot of
questions, and I'm saving them for when he does start teaching and mentoring me. His name,
biography, and bibliography are all able to be found in the two places every aspiring cartoonish
SHOULD hope to be listed in: Lambiek Comiclopedia, and Wikipedia. If you get far enough in
to be listed there, that means someone's heard of you. There's more to it than that, but that's kind
of the bottom line. Fantagraphics, WCN, and Oni Double Feature are pretty big indie institutions.
I sense I could learn a lot of important information from Tom through tutoring and consulting.

P a g e | 874

END TIMES
Best of Florida (hidden gems):

UCF
Valencia Community College
Crealde
Winter Park
Fort Lauderdale
Full Sail
Downtown Orlando
Walt Disney World
7-11
Burger King - Wendy's
The Art Institute of Ft. Lauderdale
Real Radio
Little Asia
Casselberry
Sequential Artists Workshop
Acme Comics and Collectibles
MegaCon
OIA
Gated Rich House Neighborhoods
Sanford
Seminole County
Seminole County History Museum
Flea World
Fun World
Epcot
Kennedy Space Center
Amtrak
Daytona Beach
Sarasota
Miami
Sunrise Hall
1300 Queen Elaine Drive
Jo Ann L. Cook
Phil
Jean Hess
Lynne Mele

P a g e | 875

END TIMES
My new moonlighting gig, as an animation, comics, and pop culture journalist with a news blog,
is thrilling. I get to help define public thought and what the media focuses on. I'm not the most
prolific journalist, but I'm kind of trying to continue my education with Coursera and Stanford,
and prepping for my lessons with Tom in the field of cartooning and comics. And that's just the
tip of the iceberg. My 30th birthday is also coming up, and for the first time in my life I know the
names of more of my biological family members than just my mother and father. I just wish I
had a place to publish my talks with the elusive and reclusive Thomas Romain, one of my
personal heroes.
About my life: Though I often don't get paid for any of my work, that doesn't mean my schedule
isn't busy. As a matter of fact, nowadays, it's different than it used to be. I'm not as obsessed with
filler on television as I used to be. And now I can identify filler, so technically I know if my time
is being wasted or not. It's rare that I'm ever away from one of the two computers and keyboards
in my house. I'm always at my keyboard in Microsoft Word and CeltX, typing things out for
hours on end, while listening to mp3s and Google Play, playing YouTube on and off.
I hope my line of work allows me to meet the next super nice Asian friend like the one I had in
high school, my teacher Sue Choi
My journalism blog mostly features articles and press releases for many of my favorite
established brands, as well as some newer up and coming brands in pop culture. Every so often
I'll sneak in an entry for a DVD release with an Amazon review of a box set for a show or series
of anime or cartoon or comic book trade I really like. A lot of it's just highlighting stuff I find
elsewhere on news sites.
I've been downloading, watching, and reading a lot of stuff from Mangafox, The Pirate Bay, and
BitTorrent. I actually even follow their official accounts on Twitter now. I actually think what
they do is pretty cool, making new and old anime and manga free like that, not to mention saving
the average cartoon and comics viewer-reader a fortune that would otherwise go to retail
shopping. Now you don't have to be rich to feel rich. Just download and read a million anime,
manga, and TV shows on those sites. I'm currently downloading 24 and Breaking Bad, (the
entire series) among many others. The "What TV show are you watching?" questions is now
taking the same shape as a "What's on your iPod?" question. In other words, it's "What are you
downloading and torrenting. Everyone in the industry knows who Bryan Johnston is. And
everyone's watching Breaking Bad, which is partially based on him and his crazy exploits.
Somehow it makes him look less destructive and more self-defeating. Would hate to be him right
now, or any day of any year, ever!

P a g e | 876

END TIMES
Mentors, Teachers, Tutors, Consultants, and Elder Advisors:

Phil Ferretti (Animation, Cartooning, Drawing)

Donna Frank (Painting, Drawing)
Rima Jabbur (Fine Art)
Clay L. Holiday (Film, Writing)
Ramin Zahed (Journalism, Animation, Writing)
Steve Blum
Thomas Romain
Dan Vado
Tom Hart (Cartooning, Panels, Storytelling, Comics and Sequential Art)

Writer Friends: (Great Writers in their own Rite)

Dave Sim
Jamie S. Rich
Ramin Zahed
Dan Vado
Jhonen Vasquez
Savin Yeatman-Eiffell
Tom Hart
Katsuhiro Otomo
Seth MacFarlane
Dave Willis
Brendan Small
Brian Michael Bendis
JJ Abrams
Dave Filoni
Naoki Urasawa
ASMB
[adult swim]
Steven Colbert
Breaking Bad
Eminem
Redman
Method Man
MC Bat Commander (Aquabats)
Man of Action

P a g e | 877

END TIMES
I've had to deal with a lot of events taking place in my life and
career: I quietly worked on my manuscript I compulsively wrote and
drew, all while helping to invent YouTube and a handful of other
devices, dealing with an evil twin epidemic, stopping a sociopath from
taking over the mainstream media world, corresponding with some of the
most famous people on the planet, inciting the revolution of the Arab
Spring in Egypt and the Middle East, responding to damning media
accusations of perversion and debauchery that somehow manifested as a
side effect of my newly discovered power, reputation, and fame,
leading an online tech revolution, being trusted as an expert on
anime, feuding with some of my more hostile neighbors, attempting to
build my own mythos of New-Earth and Mono, and getting a prestigious
education (for the most part).

With my newly discovered access to downloaded episodes of TV shows found on The Pirate
Bay and downloaded through BitTorrent, I sense a potential revolution and trade secret in the
making! American shows, French Shows, Canadian Shows, Japanese Shows. Doesn't matter. I
can find and access them all, and thanks to torrenting, I don't have to pay a single penny for it
unless I want to. I'll have a ton of material to stream 24/7 on Action Toon. Currently I'm in the
process of torrenting what may be over 1,000 episodes, or at the very least, 500+. It's amazing.
That's raw power. The internet makes you powerful. All I need is some banners on Action Toon
and I'll be all set. I might be able to actually make some money from this thing if I can find an ad
server.
In terms of peers online, my business model for Action Toon is similar to that of Toonami
Aftermath, YouTube, Netflix, Cartoon Network Live TV (online), Neon Alley (which charges a
subsription fee), and Pandora (which is free). Online Linear "In The Moment" Streaming. Best
way to describe it.
I have the schedule of a real writer and broadcaster now. When I'm not writing, I'm broadcasting,
and when I'm not broadcasting or writing books, I'm designing and drawing sequential art for a
few days here, and a few days there, on and off.
Like War and Peace, and the Star Wars saga, I'm developing a world with a large scale cultural,
military, and political conflict and long lasting war taking place as the backdrop, with more
individualized conflicts happening in most of the scenes.
So much of my identity comes from standing AGAINST something bad, like my
parents or brother, Nazis, news, bad TV, big/scary things, terrorists,
Hitler-Bryan and Hollywood Cheese and excess, and standing for technology,
Obama, Google, YouTube, Twitter, Toonami, Adult Swim, TV, comics, anime,
animation, and my friends, and power players I'm a fan of, the latter when
they're all in their prime.

P a g e | 878

END TIMES
Symbols of Power:
College, Art School, Fame, Employment, Money, Job, Politics and Military, Family, Travel,
Status, Prestige, Wealth, Sex, Relationships, Popularity, Influence, Icon Status, Aggression,
Curse Words, Ubiquity, TV, Comics, Sequential Art, Novels, Driving, Transportation, A House,
Marriage
I have issues with vanity, parents, power, perfection, and control.
When making art comparisons to your own art, it is important to be fair with yourself, and not be
a perfectionist. If you live and work in America, you really need to stick to comparing your work
to the American Toon Market, be it action or comedy. If you compare your work to the
renaissance work, (i.e. The Renaissance, Anime, Manga) you're only going to get discouraged
and frustrated. OF COURSE it's better. Their culture encourages that kind of thing, this one
doesn't. Comparing your work with anime and not American animation, is like swimming
against the tides. It's not a fair comparison. They will kill you and kick your ass at drawing. Don't
do it man! It's not worth it! If you're American, you're better off comparing your work to the
following:

Pixar
Disney
Warner Brothers
Nickelodeon
Cartoon Network
Adult Swim
Spongebob
The Simpsons
Scooby-Doo
Mickey Mouse
Ed, Edd, n' Eddy
Butch Hartman
Pokemon
Batman

Wednesday, October 24th, 2013,

All these new friends on Twitter seem to keep "demanding my presence". It's like they want me
to be the host of a nonstop party or something.
Okay, Twitter aside, much as I love Twitter and am incredibly popular there, I've got Batmanlike work to do. Like writing spec scripts, and drawing cartoons, anime, comics, whatever the

P a g e | 879

END TIMES
fuck you want to call it. Names are unimportant here in America. It's the style and content that
matters.
However, I'm getting some clues into the mystery of my life. I'm starting to deduce the source of
my exhaustion, fatigue, and other elements that prevent me from getting more work done. It's the
sensitivity. The fame pressure bully or bullies online and near m house. The Indigo temperament,
which harbors acuteness and sensitivity. It's the overstimulation of media and bullying in my
own house from my father and neighbors that wears me out. The energy expunged on social
trifles and bullying is deducted from my morale, vitality, and energy level. Mania, Ginseng, and
Caffeine can help, but if I don't focus my mind and studies, it's useless energy.
Birthday's coming up. My Birthday: November 17th. Not that I want anyone to know that's my
birthday.
I want to be a Director. Producer is similar to a Director. In TV Animation, Executive Producers
are the new Directors.
One way to Direct the Film In Your Head is to Draw Comics. Stories in Comics and Animation,
and Stories in Film, are told the same way.
I'm trading up. I'm switching my publishing home:
I'm going to distribute e-comics of End Times through Graphicly.com.
I'm fed up with WCN. No more of that.
New Publishers / Distributors, for when I get really good at comics.

Diamond Comics Distributors

Graphicly
MangaMagazine.net
Webcomics Nation (formerly, Currently: Ghost)
DeviantART
Blogger
Twitter
Google+
Google Search Engine
Kindle Fire
NOOK
iBookstore
Kobo

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Never judge a publisher or online distributor of comics solely by its' "ambitions and aspirations".
Those don't mean jack shit. Only three things matter with publishers: Revenues, presence, and
results.
Kindle, Graphicly, print-on-demand, and Amazon are increasing in popularity, meanwhile
traditional printing, and "brick and mortar" bookstores like Borders, are on the way out. These
things are beyond our control, unfortunately. This generation and future generations will get all
their books online in digital format or order them through the mail. Brick and Mortar bookstores
will be a thing of the past.
The "Anybody Can Do It, Too" Gimmick
Truth is, everybody or anybody CAN'T do it. The minute someone tries to rationalize the success
of something I do for a living with "Hey, Joe did it, that means ANYBODY can do it" style
sloganeering, head for the hills. Run away, because they're trying to swindle and con you. That's
"Motivational Feel Good New Age Hippie" psychobabble, that for the most part is BULLSHIT.
REAL success takes talent, and it will NEVER be available to everyone. That's the words of
someone trying to make a fraudulent, slogan-based sales pitch profit by trying to take shortcuts
to a fatter wallet by liberalizing the truth of what I do, which is you'll never get to my level
unless you're as innovative or ingenious as I am. That's a polite way of saying I'm a loser and I
"got lucky" and "have no real talent". Further bullshit sloganeering. That's denying me the credit
I DESERVE. Nobody said the REAL truth was supposed to be pleasant, or attainable. Success
and getting to the top is NEVER easy. And that's how people want to see it happen. "And You
Can Too" is classic con-man scam-speak.
How to NOT FAIL
Avoid "And you can too"
DON'T be a "Me Too" hanger-on type. Avoid the "me too" get rich quick scheme
mentality
Don't Lie to People, even if it ends up hurting people's feelings
Have a Plan
Underpromise and overdeliver
Don't talk. The only real way of speaking to the world is to practice and take action
Avoid the Bully Known As Fame.
Looking Forward to this: http://www.hup.harvard.edu/features/dickinson/
http://drfaustusau.deviantart.com/gallery/34469914

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Saturday, October 26th, 2013,
All webcomics are not created equal, or the same way. There are different webcomics mediums,
just like there's different genres of animation and traditional comics.
With webcomics, there's:
Online Comics Genres Include

Fanart
Doujinshi
Comic Books
Comic Strips
Manga
Indie Comics

My every movement, action, thought, or speech patterns, and any words I speak or opinions I
have are now of interest to the media. I guess I am famous.
Technically, I'm not allowed to talk about money on anything that runs on a computer anymore.
I'm not because I've stopped allowing myself. That would be giving the competition free
information, and an edge up on me. I've got to do everything in my power to assure that doesn't
happen.
Tuesday/ Wednesday, October 30th, 2013,

"Name-Less"
Name, will probably always be evolving.
That's the cardinal rule of the anonymous cartoonist. You have to update your coding every so
often.
And the name will KEEP CHANGING every so often, until it's actually useful..
I write and draw, without traditional publication, without a tangible audience, and without a
paycheck, basically ever. I don't see that changing anytime soon. While the impulse and
compulsion to write can come easy, writing fiction without ever having an audience is difficult
and very unenjoyable. And drawing under the same circumstances (at least for me) is 5-10 times
more so.

In the 90s, my relationships involved face time, and in person interaction.

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In the 2003 and beyond, something shifted, it evolved into 90% correspondence by
phone, TV, ad online. And shockingly enough everyone else followed suit (sort of, with
the exception of extraverted, which is almost everyone I know on a personal level).

On the internet I have an audience.

The Good
The Bad
The Very, Very Ugly
----------------Demon Skeletons in the Closet on Halloween

A lawsuit against the fabricated companies trying to profit off of slapping copyright claims on
my video, a lawsuit isn't going to happen overnight. Like Mom said, they can take up to years to
settle, if not longer. Lawsuits are quite epic. But I did take certain forms of action against these
parties immediately.
I filed a sound ordinance disturbance report my neighbors (the loudest ones more than others),
the one living behind me who has all the "parties". And I filed a complaint against the copyright
scam on YouTube against the copywrong trolls with the Federal Trade Commission and FBI
Online Fraud division. My little Scorpion tail is working overtime. But I should look on the
bright side. At least SOME of my nemeses have been receiving their comeuppance. In other
words, they may hustle, but they're certainly not going to get away with it. Especially not in the
end. It's an ongoing battle for freedom, independence, peace, harmonious co-existence, and
money.
I'm Jesus. And the media people tend to think in a similar way to ancient Romans, what with
giant coliseums of death, combat, and destruction, offering the "winner" a life of "glory & fame"
The only justification for only manifesting your work with art or art-&-writing, and not "just
writing" is economical, if you're doing it for the fame. Writers aren't famous. Almost no writer
really is. And we like it that way.
Just using writing alone to develop one's ideas is a highly overrated hobby, pastime, and
profession
I'm just the right mixture of sensitive, weak, effeminate, nerd, visionary, mystic genius leader
revolutionary and cool delinquent, masculine, athletic slacker, class-clown, rebel, idiot-savant.
Ask any number of my now-very-old middle school and art school friends/classmates.
There's really only a handful of people, living and breathing on this earth that can actually match
this caliber of profile, outside of the real superstars like Steve Jobs, John Lasseter, Phil Ferretti,

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Mark Zuckerberg, Todd McFarlane, Katsuhiro Otomo, Ken Wilber, Dave Sim, Mike Judge, and
Mr. Commander in Chief President Barack Obama.
It's just the right mixture of cockiness and total insecurity, the right mix of introversion and
extraversion.
It's weird how I get connected to politics sometimes.
The most interesting is the Egypt, Cairo, protestor connection.
But probably the most chilling "coincidence" was when I was researching political figures, I log
onto wikipedia to research the terrorist mastermind Osama Bin Laden. I was curious as to his
current status, this was around 9 o'clock on May 2nd, 2011. I pulled up the wikipedia page on
Osama Bin Laden. Why? To this day I don't exactly know. I leave the page, leave the computer
walk around the house, go about my business. 2 hours later, around 11 o'clock at night, I get
confirmation through whispering, on Twitter that "Osama Bin Laden is Dead" "Osama Bin
Laden Has Been Killed" and other details, over and over again. So I turn on the news. Christmas
came early that night. Santa brought me the head of Osama Bin Laden. That's the greatest gift a
full grown man born in 1983 of multinational descent could ever ask for. Hands down.
This was one instance that made me suspect I might be psychic, and able to practice what is
known as "remote viewing", whether in writing, with art, or with computers. Where you draw or
access visions of things that exist or become real elsewhere, sometimes very close, sometimes
very far away. Or you write certain words or draw certain images that will prove crucial,
important, or relevant later on.
It's nice having fans online. Having a moderate amount of recognition and respect feels good.
Much of it is thanks to Google, YouTube, Adult Swim, Toonami. And Twitter. Those people on
there showed me a lot of love. I'm feelin' this. It is true. I am in the spotlight quite a bit. It's an
odd mixture of respect and envy-inspired mockery.
Thursday, October 31st, 2013 (Halloween, 2013),
I have 2 things to contend with. A compulsion to write and a web revolution I am interested in,
and a TV show that will never get made or become anything, and that I'm not interested in.
Art, or Money? Art, or Money? Money IS the new art in my life.
Money, and making money, is an art form.
Today, on Halloween Day, (which is one of my favorite holidays), I discovered New
Technology, yet again!
I will explain. It's the next big thing in streaming media.

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It's called DLNA - Digital Living Network Alliance.
It's a new and developing electronics technology, developed and released on
the market by Sony Corporation, sometime right around 2003, and it's the
next big thing in streaming media. When people discover this tech, they're
gonna hit the ceiling, they'll jump so hard.
DLNA utilizes transcoding, andinteroperability to enable
media between multimedia devices

sharing of digital

Friday, November 1st, 2013, (Birthday Month),

Woo-hoo, it's November! Fall!
Let's keep talking about DLNA, cause it's just that awesome.

Hard Drive - To - Cell Phone

Hard Drive - To - TV Streaming Media Device (Roku
TV - To - DVD
DVD - To - Hard Drive [i.e. ripping]
Torrent Download Site - To - BitTorrrent Server
Torrent Server - To - Hard Drive
Torrent Server - To - Server on TV Streaming Media Device (Plex/Roku)

Friday, November 1st, 2013

Idealist. Indigo Soul. I'm an Idealist Indigo Soul. And Me as Perfection would have been me
leading a team of animators, writers, producers, directors, voice actors, designers, and all other
sorts on a grand scale, most likely on a Japanese-French-American International Co-Production
that would invent its own Mythology in the same way Star Wars and Lord of the Rings and
Conan The Barbarian, Ridley Scott, Isaac Asimov, Leo Tolstoy, Dave Sim, Akira, and HP
Lovecraft and Jhonen Vasquez and Production I.G. all did so many years ago. I HAD that
potential. That was my potential. Me as Manifested as Perfection in My Psychic Mind's Eye.
Leading the frontlines of a War Against Lack of Imagination, Storytelling, Narrative, and
Creativity.
I NEVER gave up on that ideal. But I did realize what it represented to my life. The Ideal. My
Mind's Eye View of Epic Perfection. The Greatest Feat of the Modern World in all its Splendor
and Glory. That was my Indigo Ideal of Perfection. It is The Me I Always Knew I Could Be. But
my personality does not endorse that. That is how it is with ALL Indigo's. Your Visionary Mind
and Spirit starts off your career and/or life, aiming for something, your wildest dream come true
it won't sleep or rest until it "Achieves Realization as a Promise Made Good". That Dream will
never become real. It's meant as a Rallying Cry for the Troops of your Soul and Spirit. The main
thing that helps get one through the day. It is unique to each Indigo Soul. Not just myself.

P a g e | 885

Indigo's have perfect minds, visions, and souls. But the amount of imperfections in their

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personality are legendary on the opposite end of the scale. That's just how we Indigo OpenThird-Eyes are.
It takes an ocean of imperfection and flawed, imperfect personality and output to build an island,
mountains, and Fortress of Perfection and Something Truly Meaningful. Every 1 perfect line is
built on 50 flawed lines, which comprise its form.
Make a game out of it. For Every Imperfection and imperfect word, line, paragraph, form or
sentence I mind-spill onto the page, I get an experience point. Manifesto is a Million Experience
Points, because it is a million words long. Fiction and Comics are no different.
I am known by many residences. Well, 2 to be exact. I lived with relatives in Kankakee, Illinois
for 6 months with my Aunt Patty and Uncle Denny.
I lived in Michigan from the time I was born until the age of two.
Michigan Address:
14 Donegal Court, Ann Arbor, Michigan, 48104 (Ypsilanti County)
Florida Address:
1300 Queen Elaine Dr., Casselberry, Florida, 32707 (Seminole County)
Room 149, Sunrise Hall, Fort Lauderdale, Florida, Miami County
I recognized my old Ann Arbor house when I just saw it online earlier. It looks EXACTLY THE
SAME as it did when I was 2 years old! I REMEMBER!!!
French Animation Writers:

Thomas Romain (Satelight)

Savin Yeatman-Eiffel (Sav! The World)
Enki Bilal
Michelle & Robert Lamoreaux (Marathon)
Tania Palumbo (Code Lyoko)

November 2nd, 2013,

Outsourcing is overrated. It's too tricky to be reliable. Sure, it sounds good on the surface, but the
more you think about it, the more you realize how much it screws up the American economy to
rely on things like Japanese TV shows, books, comics, business, and technology. That subtracts
from America's local power. You don't see the Japanese relying on Americans for THEIR
entertainment and labor.

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That's my new dream, be the next LucasFilm, Williams Street, Pixar, Microsoft, Google,
YouTube, and Turner Inc. Rely only on American art, stories, and labor. Sure, the story can take
PLACE in Japan, as long as it production isn't produced there.
Made in America is my Badge of Honor. I still believe in the American Dream.
Made in Central FL, USA
American:

Eminem
Hip-Hop
Cartoon Network
[adult swim]
Toonami
Twitter
YouTube
Piracy
Star Wars
Hollywood
L.A.
The Sequential Art Workshop
Oni Press
SLG Publishing
Jhonen Vasquez
Google
Microsoft
American Books
GI Joe: Resolute
IGPX
Adult Swim Bumps
End Times
Online Comics
Me and My Projects and Work
I-75
DirecTV
Time Warner
Warner Brothers
Disney XD

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----------------------------------------------

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Territories to Gain Ground In
Los Angeles, California
Tokyo, Japan
Paris, France
Hong-Kong, China
Russia
Okay, so Tokyo and L.A. didn't work out as planned. I've decided I'm going to give it a go at
somewhere where resistance to my style isn't at such a high level. Somewhere where black
trenchcoats and apocalyptic dual blades are beloved and accepted. Somewhere where I've
already made a name for myself, online at the very least.

Things, aren't, the way they were before

You Wouldn't even recognize me anymore
Not that you knew me back then
But it all comes back to me
In the end

Cary Alberts' senior citizen's Alzheimer Dementia is acting up again. You can tell his dementia
is acting up when he becomes difficult to talk to, get along with, share a house with, or even live
with. It gets to the point where you're actually HOPING he'll die or get incapacitated and injured
just so you can laugh at his funeral and not attend it like a sucker. I HOPE he dies! He's fuckin'
psycho!
Tuesday, November 5, 2013,
Good stories don't just explore action, themes, events, and situations. Good stories explore the
relationship between the cast of characters. Both the cast's emotions and their psychological
aspects.
My oldest unofficial employer and boss is clearly the boreds of [adultswim.com]. I provide them
with a lot of free material. Always have, and always will as long as they treat me good enough,
and not like a scapegoat punching bag like they did at one point.

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Well, I've made up my mind: [adultswim.com] Live Broadcasts is officially awesome! And I've
only been using it for like an hour or two.
Friday, November 8th, 2013,
What's on my Google Play queue?
Soundtrack to a Moment: Jedi Mind Tricks - "Kublai Khan", (single and remix).
Hip-hopping it up.
Financially speaking, it is a volatile time for me. I might be on the edge of a YouTube related
lawsuit, if no one answers my inquiries and complaints.
But a lot of money is at stake in my case, I stand to gain a lot financially and everyone is against
me because I AM going to make a killing. Kind of obvious.
"Protect what you have. Because people will try to take it from you"
-Steven Jay Blum
"That's the adventure of writing, is it evolves and changes and shifts over time, and you're never
sure where it's going to go. The scenes and stories, and characters take on a life of their own, and
you have to go with that, the story taking on a role different than that of what you're trying to
do."
-George Lucas

There is only one way to finish work on and complete End Times. Make EVERYTHING I work
on, EVERYTHING I PUT ON ANY PAGE OF ANY SORT End Times, therefore increasing its
firepower and momentum. Even Manifesto and Oliver will integrate into End Times.
It's not that I'm not working hard enough and putting my all into my work. It's that I'm
segregating and dividing it up too much. I've been segregating my content, Not Integrating It.
I was getting ahead of myself. Planning for 4 separate franchises when I couldn't even finish
work on 1. Now they're All 1.
That's great! I got my first email from a fan of my work today. That's the first inquiry I've gotten
that was unsolicited, since Lindsey Vest, which is really cool.
Some guy wanted to know how he could buy a copy of the book I published in 2012. It's out of
print, but I'm probably going to release a second edition on Amazon and other stores, more than

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END TIMES
likely, as there actually seems to be some demand for it. The friend of the person writing the
email already bought a copy of my book and I think that's how the fan knows about it.
Fortunately, Art Manifested, my pocket art book, is on the up and up apparently. Within the next
week or two, Art Manifested will be available through Amazon stores worldwide, in part of the
manga fantasy section, through the Amazon Kindle Store, in the United States, The United
Kingdom, France, Japan, Canada, Italy, Brazil, Spain, Mexico, Germany, and India.
It's a good thing Kindle publishing is free to publish an e-book through now. Now I'm more
worldwide and international than ever. There are many advantages to publishing through Kindle.
Digital distribution rights. International distribution. Higher residuals and royalties. More
visibility. An easier way to distribute literary content. Lower prices for my work. More
availability everywhere in North American, Europe, and Asia.
I will be hiring a disabilities caregiver when I move out in the next few years, and relocate to
somewhere outside of Florida. Somewhere less stressful than Florida.
My parents are right, I'm NOT independent, which is why I will hire one or more caregivers.
They're like butlers and maids, but they're for people with disabilities, who can't entirely take
care of themselves, like me.
Dead?

Graphicly
Diamond Comics

Alive?

Kindle
CreateSpace
Lulu

-------------------------------------My purpose in life is to write, draw, and be a comic book (&) manga artist. Forever, I guess.
There's more resistance against pursuing work than ever before, and nowadays even my parents
are attempting to hoard, backstab, and sabotage me from getting ahead, but I can't let that stop
me. I have to take each day as it comes. Each day is a new battle, with new enemies, challenges,
and obstacles.
Enough with the hypothetical "visionary" paragraphs about where I "will be" and where I want to
be in 10 to 20 years. Technically, I'm already THERE, I'm already in my 30s, goddamit! and all
I've got to show for it is a 5 o'clock shadow, and a mountain of malware tracking my every move

P a g e | 892

for god knows what.

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And I've got 2 parents who are very jealous and sabotage-ish with me.
All I really want to find is contentment. Sex and art never offered that to me. But I still feel I
need to make the effort to pursue my art anyway. When I'm not playing with my smart phone
man-toy, or adding to my collection of transcoded videos on my hard drive, or watching
streaming video, even if I have been a tad bit burned out on video lately. I suppose I could
always sketch, write in this journal, write fiction, clean the house, clean my room, look for jobs
and things that pay, or simply wait until that health care money comes in again.
I've never viewed money as a "political tool" the way my critics do in their justification of
blacklisting and boycotting every product I've ever release. Well, some people like to link bling
with politics anyway. That's pretty stupid. Oohh, lookit me, I'm rich, so therefore that
automatically gives me the power of political credibility. That's why Bill Gates and Steve Jobs
are the President and Vice President of the United States and not running Silicon Valley instead,
right? Oh wait! No that's supposedly Barack Obama's job. My mistake. It's hard to understand
how some people (typically the ones with NO power in reality) could mistake the two...In a
misguided attempt at defining how money and power work, and how they're "linked" which they
are not always. Was Martin Luther King rich? Was Jesus rich? Was Gandhi rich? Far as I know
they all started off with nothing but a dream and a vision.
Also, forcing people to work for free is a crime. What YouTube, CN, Adult Swim, and Twitter
do to people like me on a daily basis is technically illegal. Free work is against the law in a
corporate setting. You don't pay your employees, you're technically a criminal. Yet no one seems
to mind. In Silicon Valley on the internet, you can force people to work for you for free for the
rest of their lives, and no one even thinks of looking into the fact that you're a criminal who's
breaking the law by forcing free labor on people who aren't aware of their rights.
Tuesday, November 12th, 2013,
Well, I've won today's fight. And the fight for tomorrow will arrive again, tomorrow, when the
sun of dawn rises on a new day, and the battle for Tomorrow's art and literature will begin again,
and start a new for yet another day in the War of Art.
For me, The Dawn of Every Day brings a New Battle and Fight. Who will I be fighting with
tomorrow over the dominion of my free time? Hopefully an easy opponent.
Saturday, November 16th, 2013
My 30th Birthday is less than 24 hours away. It's tomorrow. Finally, I'm going to get to be 30
years old, and I can "Think and Grow Rich".
I'm 1 day away from being 30 years old. Only 10 more years till 40. And 20 more years until 50.
Then it's all downhill, and I'll probably be dead after that. I suppose I could make it to 60. But I

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am doubtful. Europe and the Northwest United States, and Canada might become second homes
to me. But I'm not counting on much.
I find clenching my jaw to be an effective counter-laughter method. If some jackass in the house
next door to me wants to penalize me for laughing by verbally harassing me from his backyard
or whatever, I have ways of dealing with that too. Take away his fuel.
Sunday, November 17th, 2013,
Just got off of the phone with Chris, who was interested in talking to me on my smart phone.
It's my 30th Birthday. I'm 30 today. This day started last night, when Toonami did.
I got a box of Dunkin Donuts, cake, macaroni pie, Burger King, an Amazon gift card, and some
savings money. And well wishes from my oldest friend, Chris Hess.
So far I've written over 1,600,000 words on my computers.

Manifesto 1
Manifesto 2
Commentary
Journals 1
Journals 2
Journals 3
Journals 4
Blogger Book
Novella

Monday, November 18th, 2013

Ahhhhh. Good birthday. Turning thirty did wonders for my vitality and morale.
I am no longer a fan of animation and comics. I am animation and comics.
Animation, Comics, Books, Novels, Literature, Film, Anime, French anime Manga, BD.
I now am all of these things.

Tuesday, November 19th, 2013,

Today is another special day to me, following my 30th birthday by only 2 days!
Today, November 19th, 2013, marks the first day one of my comic book one shots or End Times

P a g e | 895

manga, comic or one shot indie comic, of any sort, has been published on Amazon.com.

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My secret to achieving this career goal of distributing my comics on Amazon?
Kindle Digital Press.
Books I've published through Kindle Digital Press Worldwide, so far:

Art Manifested
The Imaginomicon
End Times (Pilot)

I rely on YouTube for the REAL profits. But it is nice to be a published manga-ka. I don't even
feel guilty saying that anymore. I'm really growing into my job title. And I'm one of the oldest
people doing the manga thing in America. Most of the authors producing manga in America, that
are American, are younger than 25 years old. I don't know the average statistical information and
raw data on that field, but manga-ka in America genuinely aren't very old.
That might just mean I'm one of the few artists with American manga seniority. I'm one of the
few who's been doing this manga thing the longest, I'm one of the oldest, relatively speaking.
I'm 30 years old. Most people drawing manga at a skilled level are teens and 20-somethings

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Wednesday, November 20th, 2013,
Key words:

International Creativity
International Teamwork
Harmonious International Creative Teamwork

I got that idea from my ideal vision of myself. I wanted to make co-productions (STILL DO
want to make anime and co-pros in France), because of teamwork. That is what it boils down to.
Other people's messed up minds/philosophy:

Illuminati = Power
Politics = Money
Socialism = Government
Fame = People to Bully
Chance and Luck, not success = Success
Fancy and Unnecessary = Mind Boggling Art Detailing
Arrogance, Annoying Sissy = Joe
Name to say a trillion times = Joe
Word to say a trillion times = Pants
-------------------------------------JUDGMENT DAY HAS ARRIVED...

Moved 6 units on Kindle (1 book with 1 unit, and the other with 5 units), in the last 2 days alone.
Whoa. That's the most amount of units I've ever moved in one day so far.

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Thursday, November 21st, 2013,
Currently, my Amazon e-book is the 6,000 highest selling Amazon ebook in the entire world, out
of over 9,000,000 ebooks and non-ebooks available on all of Amazon. Something to be proud of.
I'm finally starting to leave a dent on Amazon and the literary market. Happy day! I'm even
beginning to move units and one of my books is in the top 10,000 selling ebooks on Amazon
Kindle.
Page 1 of 1 (4 items)

Art: Manifested - The Art of J.M. Matthews

Kindle Edition
Current Sales Rank: #6,092 in Kindle Store
Average Review: There are no reviews yet

End Times: One Shot

Kindle Edition
Current Sales Rank: #296,921 in Kindle Store
Average Review: There are no reviews yet

The Imaginomicon: Volume I

Kindle Edition
Current Sales Rank: Unknown
Average Review: There are no reviews yet

Art: Manifested - The Art of J.M. Matthews

Paperback
Current Sales Rank: #9,075,897 in Books
Average Review: There are no reviews yet

On Amazon, I have a journal, 2 editions of an art book, and a manga-noir.

Frankly, I'm a little exhausted from making the online rounds promoting my work.
Success doesn't happen overnight, and often not even in 1 or 2 years. Sometimes it takes half a
decade, a decade, or even longer.
I have yet to see the definitive sales numbers for my Kindle projects.

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There's

The Amazon Portfolio

Google Portfolio
Broadcasting Portfolio
Website Portfolio
Novella Portfolio
Script Portfolio
Manuscript Portfolio
P.O.D. Comics Portfolio
P.O.D. Books Portfolio
Art Portfolio
Digital Video File Collection

Apparently I have a large and colorful body of work.

If you're a REALLY good auteur, filmmaker, animator, and cartoonist, depending on how strong
your vision is, you should start your own media company: It's what all the great auteurs do: John
Lasseter, Walt Disney, Bill Gates, Steve Jobs, Steven Spielberg, George Lucas, Todd McFarlane,
Quentin Tarantino, Katsuhiro Otomo, Hideaki Anno, Yoshiyuki Sadamoto, Osamu Tezuka, and
J.J. Abrams. They're all the best in the business. And all of them funded and founded studios
and/or companies.
Thanks to Amazon sales with my books, especially Art Manifested, my art has achieved a new
level of recognition, prominence, prestige, status, and power online. I've got more credibility and
authority as an artist than I've ever had. I'm not Jhonen or Frank Miller or Eiichiro Oda. I'm
someone else entirely, which is probably a good thing. Although there are some analogies out
there that get made between me and some of those guys. They're like more experienced and
prestigious versions of myself. What I might turn into in 10 or 20 years. I'm off to a killer start.
My comics aren't selling half as good as my art itself is in ebook form. I've got to correct that
somehow.
All this spotlight on my creativity is making me eager to pick up a pencil again. I've got more
than 1,000 pgs of vintage comic book reference material I bought at one of my early peak youth
periods. As a matter of fact, I might have an excess of inspirational material. I do collect old and
new comic books after all.
I moved 50 units in 4 days.

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END TIMES
Saturday, November 23rd, 2013,
Between Monday and Today (Saturday), in 6 days, I've sold 100 online copies (units) of Art
Manifested, worldwide, at Kindle Stores around the world.
The vast majority of my books have been sold in Amazon America. But, I've also sold a small
handful of units of Art Manifested online for free in the United Kingdom, France, Japan, Canada,
Italy, Canada, and India.
Yes, technically I am famous, but...
I'm living the American Dream, as of Today. There was a time I was poor, but that was
yeeeesterdaaaay!
Now I'm getting approached for autographs by some people. Kind of outrageous.
Because of all that media and online business, I've got the power now. And lots of it! I don't
know if that means wealth will follow. Maybe. But I've got sales, fame, and power. Not bad Joe!
Hey I just realized. Playing with myself sends off a quantifiable energy chi signal into the
stratosphere that can easily be measure by energy radars many miles away. It's an easy way to
flaunt my power: Grab your DICK, and have yourself a couple lil' ol' orgasms. Great way to stop
time. Just like a Time-Lord!
I'm going to get paid what will probably be a small sum of a lot of money in the next few
months, years, and beyond. Got it! I'm getting paid. Now about that whole "laid and paid" thing.
Sunday, November 24th, 2013,
I've earned a net total of over $350 this week from ebook sales on Kindle Direct on
Amazon.com.
Comics ISN'T magic. It's just work, routine, and practice. A lot of it. There's no such thing as a
secret technique in art. But there is a minimal amount of time needed to be invested in each
comic book panel.

P a g e | 901

END TIMES
It's not just 'clones' and other gaslighting, sociopathological individuals in the liberal media who
want to interfere with my drawing process on a psycho-emotional level with their little mind
games, I'm afraid my own parents have a similar intent to sabotage my work sessions. They'd
have a lot to lose from me succeeding and earning a living.
Gary Busey: HOW'M I DOIN' TODAY GARY BUSEY!!!!!
Reflection: GOOD!!!!
Busey: GOOD!!!!! WELL THEN, I'LL KEEP IT UP!!!!!
---------------Tuesday, November 26th, 2013,
Weigh my options.
There are 2 seperate Tech endeavors I could take on:

1 is founding an animation related Streaming TV Website, ActionToonTV.com, in 2014.

The other would be founding a spec software company, a multi platform desktop
software or portable app for video algorithms. Bots and all that (Most expensive option)

The Rest:

Drawing Comics using my daily routine or just drawing comics. Just diving in and
conquering it. (Page thumbs, sketchbooks, digital inking, textures, mirrors, maps, etc.)
Writing short fiction. A page a day to start off with, outlines and spec scripts, etc.
---------

My easiest option is probably to save up some of my YouTube money for my own software
startup. My algorithm startup. I have ideas for 2 companies: 1 company for algorithm tech. 1
company for cloud technology.
Current academic goals:
Learn:

Japanese
French
Photoshop
Flash
Programming

P a g e | 902

END TIMES
Thursday, November 28th, 2013,
I've wanted to be know, for a while now, as a major contributor to Orlando's local industry in
some way. After what I did in my internet days with the mainstream and internet new media, I
could have sworn I'd have promoted myself into a plaque of the Orlando Hall of Fame. Such was
not the case. Instead my neighbors hate and harass, my family is oblivious to my achievements,
and it's like I don't even exist on the Orlando map. I got snubbed by the Orlando establishment.
No local articles have ever been written about me. No TV news stories. I don't exist locally!
Friday, November 29th, 2013,
Mythopoeia. Mythos and Mythology Development, whether it's a Franchise or independent
literary project
There's more to building a mythos than mere words and literary linguistics.
Mythopoeia is often build on archetypal symbols, ensemble casts, world building, and visual
iconography, as well as effects, props, locations, and landscapes. A series of sketchbooks and
scrapbooks is a great starting place for building new-world mythologies that never existed
previously.
Comics isn't something you master. It's just something you do. Something you pursue.
I learned something valuable about Hollywood today. It's very big. Very Gigantic. It's Big. It's
Rich. It's Strong. And it's Powerful. More powerful than anything I've known growing up,
employment wise. Hollywood is where the Ultra Money, and it's where the Super Power is. But
I'm going to have to start off small. Bad Robot or Dreamworks Animation is too big of a place to
just dive into, much as I'd love to. You kind of have to quietly walk in through the back door, by
quietly concerning yourself with building a means to an end. Sometimes it's only possible to
BECOME an intern at an animation studio by being somewhat wealthy to begin with. Being poor
more often than not does not lead to wealth or power. It leads to more poverty. Not the Wizard of
Oz.
Saturday, November 30th, 2013,
Last day of November, my birthday month. So THIS is what reaching 30 feels like.
I submitted some of my sequential art to Slave Labor Graphics earlier this morning. By way of
email. I'm sure Dan Vado and Jennifer D. Guzman and the other editors at SLG will get a very
good look at it and then I'll eventually get word on my books in a few months. Six or so after
they've had time to review my proposal. I'm thinking I'm going to pursue each story arc in my
series 1 3-6 issue miniseries at a time. In terms of format my mind keeps gravitating to Ted
Naifeh's work, and how he organized his individual issues on his famous books Courtney
Crumrin and Gloom Cookie. I'm not sure if I want to be left alone to my own devices. I'd really

P a g e | 903

END TIMES
like some input and guidance from Vado, Guzman, and the like, as they seem to have many very
substantial, well-founded ideas of what works and what doesn't in indie comics and manga
publishing in the United States. They're the next best thing to Moebius, Oni Press, Image, and
Dark Horse Manga. I'd really like to be the next Evan Dorkin or Ted Naifeh on some level, but
with my own style doing my own type of thing. Even if SLG doesn't like my comics work, I
certainly hope they can pass along some advice about how to improve it. I may be old, in my
early 30s, but I've barely gotten started! Huzzah!
I've shown off my art and writing online and in retail in the near past, but always separately in
the actual manuscript. I never presented them as a combo on a combo platter, even though in
reality they are linked, inseparable in my mind, and tied together. I need to start packaging my
manuscripts that way. Maybe a written introduction to New Earth and Mono, maybe a visual
novel of prose I write. I'm sure I'll think of something. Dave Sim, Evan Dorkin, Jhonen Vasquez,
and Michael Moorcock do the worded-picture / picture-worded style book manuscript very well.
I should copy that aspect, and incorporate it into my own arsenal of manuscripts. Pick out some
of my favorite comics and books that combine pictures and words, a study their spatial structure.
Really dig in there and find out what makes them work.
I'm aware of what most anime fans think of my work, the distinct lack of appreciation for it. It
used to get to me, kind of bother me, but not currently. Now I actually don't even bother to
debate fans against it. It is what it is. Take it or leave it. But it's there, smack dab in the middle of
the open market online, regardless. So I have that going for me at least. Amazon, Google, &
Whatnot.
Truth is, fans, especially young Asian fangirls online have always been heavily critical of my
work. They'll say things like "JM can't draw". "JM's art is crude". JM doesn't deserve to draw
comics professionally because he's an inferior artist compared to more advanced manga pros.
And you know what? They're kind of right. My manga is a subpar manga satire, bordering on
insensitive over-masculine parody. But Cerebus started off that way too, as a parody of the
fantasy icon Conan the Barbarian, making fun of that. I didn't start off "making fun of anime and
manga" (not on purpose anyway) considering I've always been a second generation millennial
diehard fan of it, but I'm less offended by criticism, even the nasty kind. I'm learning to not take
myself and my art so seriously. I need to relax and learn to laugh at myself. I'm no better than
something like Ben 10, Dreamworks Animation, Avatar, Teen Titans, Star Wars The Clone
Wars, or Transformers. I do live in the country these franchises are made in after all. It's only
logical to end up that way, showing some localized pride. All that stuff is just as amazing as my
work. I know there are a few people out there who don't want me to lower my standards, don't
want me to "sell out" and "conform to the American / Hollywood mainstream L.A. market",
seeing as some people already like what I've built for myself, but if I want to survive in the
American industry, I kind of have to. Not that I can't draw. I can draw, but I can't expect
flawlessness and perfection, even though behind closed doors I'm the most extreme and militant

P a g e | 904

type of perfectionist.

P a g e | 905

END TIMES
I'm starting to realize, the more weighty of a Legacy of Literature and Art you leave behind, the
harder you will find it to measure up to the Legacy that you laid down for yourself to begin with.
It's important to keep the momentum going, keep the hands moving and never idle, if at all
possible. Whenever possible. Keep those camera shots streaming. Keep the syntactic prose
flowing, not someone else's work or likeness, but your own.
Comics isn't so much about building up your skills and talents (that often happens early on), as it
is about building up a system. A routine, a daily ritual that you follow like clockwork. I don't
exactly have a consistent schedule. I have a routine that often happens around the same time
period, between Noon and 3 to 4 p.m. I'm often not so productive at night, other than with my
writing in Microsoft Word.

P a g e | 906

Chapter 6

P a g e | 907

2014 - The Year of Bad Natured Neighborly Animosity

Monday, January 6th, 2014,
My destiny seems to be shaking things up. At the same time I'm traveling locally and getting out
of the house a lot, and getting a lot of money, taxi rides, local store stops, 2 new credit cards, and
a brand new bank account and ATM Debit card, and an Amazon seller and kindle license, it's
like the internet is out to get me. Weird how the more I reach out, the more those who kept me
down before want me to stay worse off than I was before, (they seem to think they can renounce
my overwhelming power and take all my influence and power [that they themselves gave me]
away, all because one of our business deals went sour) considering they all seem to be conspiring
to ban me and delete my accounts, to say nothing of envious, noisy neighbors. But that's okay. I
don't spend enough time near any of those groups of people to let them get to me that much. I
finally have a greater peace of mind now that I'm not famous anymore. I GOT SHIT TO DO!
Also I'm auctioning or selling off old collectibles. But before that, my adoptive father started a
fight with me, so I kicked his ass, and almost got arrested for it. That was the start of this all.
That neighbor who keeps trying to harass me and turn my parents against me for his own petty,
not scary, idiotic reasons. Apparently everyone wants a piece of this. Can't say I blame them. I
have it a LOT better than they do. Starting with not living in the shithole of a unlit house he has
that apparently never turns its interior lights on or has ANY form of light illuminating that street,
Guinevere....EVER.
And that's just the first 6 days of the year.
I'd talk about anime, but the rumors and haters are kind of forcing me to gravitate elsewhere. I'm
calling it quits with a lot of stuff.
I'm also planning my vacation lately.
I've been out and about so much, last night was one of the soundest sleeps I've ever had. I had a
dream where I was watching myself on TV, playing with a 2-D Gorillaz action figure at one of
my work desks, as the narrator for the local or national CNN-style news report was narrating my
pioneering history with YouTube and its recent decision to cut me from their roster. It went on to
say I had a $2 million comic book collection that I sold, and the 2-D Gorillaz action figure was
the first thing I bought with the sales and auction money.
So if I'm not on Adult Swim, I'm on the national TV pop culture news. Well, when I'm sleeping
at least. Not the first time an article has ever been written about me, if it were real it would be the
third. But it's the first time I've ever dreamed about being featured in the national news.
I can't LIVE in America anymore. I'm leaving ASAP. I'm moving to countries more spiritually
attuned to my aura. America has been brainwashed by Television and the Bush Administration

P a g e | 908

and Brian Johnston into collectively bullying and disliking me. There's no amount of fighting
one can do against indoctrination and brianwashing/brainwashing of an entire nation. It's called
"brainwashing", but I like to call it brianwashing. Get it??? Tee hee.
Phil never taught me how to design or animate. Come to think of it, no one did. But Thomas
Romain once gave me great, very useful advice on how to improve my drawing abilities.
I took his advice, and now I'm just starting to see results in retrospect in drawings I've done, both
older and newer, from since the time I spoke to Romain, the Lead Designer of Space Dandy and
Oban Star-Racers, BASQUASH!, and Code Lyoko. I learned some valuable insights from his
advice.
Good drawings take time. At least 1 straight hour of drawing per day on one piece of art, or even
a lot more. Drawing time should not be considered disposable time income to mess around with.
Every nanosecond counts when you are on the clock and working with a deadline.
Thursday, January 9th, 2014,
Ways I'm earning:

Account Monetary
Tweets
EZ Money
Amazon
S.S.
Plastic

Like I'd ever explain what any of this means. Having a lotta money can be stressful. I used to
think it was Money Wonderland. Till I attained some money. That's what everyone's after so of
course it's an obvious thing con artists and thieves seek out, even on cartoon shows and anime
companies. They're all a bunch of scheming crooks. Unfortunately. But that's the market I guess.
"Really cutthroat, being a conman/woman and crook".
***
Saturday, January 11th, 2014 (12:51 a.m.),
I was contacted by a Silicon Valley Job Recruiter today, through my profile on LinkedIn. Made
me so happy. All I have to do is prove I'm capable of learning a trade over in Palo Alto at a fast
pace, and sell my skills I already have, and you never know. I might be as good as hired. I cannot
wait to talk to this recruiter. Salaries range between low six figures. $150k-$290k. That's over
$400 each workday. Those jobs could make me rich, so the last thing I'd ever plan on doing
would be dismiss them. Orlando boy makes good in Big Town Silicon Valley. That's a
compelling story. But first I must revise my resume, and update it so I can upload it to my James

P a g e | 909

LinkedIn Profile. However, he must know what he's doing to some degree. Living and working
in Palo Alto, Silicon Valley, California would be one of my more recent American Dreams
come true. If he can make it happy, I have that much less to worry about. But what are my
employable office, manual, tech and clerical skills that can get me this job? Time to start writing
some essays and lists.
I have quite the task ahead of me. This new opportunity that's presented itself to me in my native
language and territory (online, in my own home, a message from the other side), could be either
incredibly easy or incredibly challenging and strategic, or a combination of both. Either way, If
this thing starts off well, I'll have done more business, done more travelling, and have more
money all at once than I'll have ever had in my life. It really depends on the communication
element, if I'm able to sell and present myself in a way that draws people into my cause, and
doesn't drive them away.
I'm a bridge builder. I build bridges. I don't just build empires and foundations anymore. I build
bridges between those foundations, connecting them. Foundations like Silicon Valley; Los
Angeles; Hollywood; China; France; Japan; Canada; Europe; Asia; The World Wide Web;
eRetail. Industries so big but down to earth it actually seems kind of otherworldly. To make
something that important happen takes an enormous budget for R&D especially, as it's never
been accomplished, perhaps never even attempted before. It involves getting to know three main
locations: Southern/Northern California, Tokyo-Japan, and Silicon Valley itself. Many meetings,
lots of meeting new people, new names. Email addresses, phone numbers, introductions.
Thousands of dollars in travel and shipping expenses. Millions and eventually billions in
budgetary analysis and expenditure. Endless, limitless planning. Endless, limitless strategy and
contract signing, and deal making. Business plans. Lots of business meetings. Lots of failure.
Lots of rejection and acceptance and friendships-relationships being built over time. Lots of
people telling you "no" a million times over and over again. Lots of doubt and potential envy.
Probably lots of plagiarism and poor imitation of the things I do as well. Ah yes. And lots of
zeros in my paychecks, but that's kind of how it is. Lotta lawyers, to cover my ass of course.
I'm a bridge between industries:

Tokyo, Japan; Anime: Conceptual Design Art (Thomas Romain, Moebius, Otomo)
Literature: Manga-Comics, Novels, Short Stories (Stephen King, HP Lovecraft, Mario
Puzo, Frank Miller, Jhonen Vasquez, Otomo)
Hollywood: Screenwriter (M. Night Shyamalan, The Wachowskis, Quentin Tarantino,
Tim Burton)
L.A. - Paris, TV Animation: (David Michel, Thomas Romain, Enki Bilal, David Chase)

P a g e | 910

Sunday, January, 12th, 2013,

Got to people I'm looking forward to hearing from, who I'm really hoping don't forget to talk to
me: Enzo of Acme, and Dinan of Silicon Valley. Looking forward to those correspondences.
Hope they deliver good news, not bad.
My art and comics career is in shambles. It's ruined. No one to blame ultimately, as far as I'm
concerned. I suppose it just wasn't meant to be. But as the art falls, so too shall the technology
and robots rise. And maybe writing, too, if I can ever force myself to stop writing journals like
it's smoking crack or something, and get serious about this thing. Doubtful, but I'll keep my
hopes up. Once a trance like daily habit has been established, it is the hardest bond in the world
to break. You spend so much time building it up, it's terrifying thinking of letting it fall. I've been
through good times with this project, and I've been through very, very bad times with this
project, but regardless, I stayed focused and came out on top.
--------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------Monday, January 13th, 2014, (2:16 p.m.),
People who make your career:
Silicon Valley, Tech Job: Job Recruiter
Los Angeles, Screenwriter: Agent
How to sell a script, What to do after the pilot is written:

Study the WGA Agency listings

See who accepts unsolicited material
Fill out forms / send emails / make phone calls
Submit script
Wait for a response
Get a call back from agents
See if they're interested
If they are, let them do their job and find a backer and get some response
Sign deal
Seal the deal
Wait
Work out contract with studio and lawyers
Work on project

P a g e | 911

Tuesday, January 14th, 2014 (10:06),

Living in Palo Alto is going to be an adjustment. It's going to be a shift.
My dreams are prophecy. Whatever I dream about is often happening in real life, either during
before or after the dream, even if the dream is only symbolic. Like my 2-D gorillaz news dream.
That was a symbol of my true success.
Apparently, my dad has around $4,300.00 in savings every month. He's actually able to live in a
large house for under $5,000.00 a month
***
Thursday, January 16th, 2014th, (5:33 p.m.),
Well, as it turns out, the Silicon Valley gig wasn't for me. The recruiter was looking for
candidates with more niche-like engineering skills.
So what does that leave me with?

Tom @ Sequential Artists Workshop

Ramin mail package he's sending
Social Security Checks
SLG Submission
Script continuation and trimming up
Coursera
Resume (Monster.com)

When I wrote my journals, they initially started off as a creative writing exercise. Something to
build the foundation of my literary skills with. Once my talents were developed and fully
realized I became hooked on the process itself. I had a certain intent in mind when I wrote my
journal memoirs. I'd hoped for it to be a literary personal account of someone who's already
Achieved something great. Not some kid stuck in limbo. Something in the vein of the memoirs
and/or journals of Kurt Cobain, Emily Dickinson, Ken Wilber, Stephen King. Not someone who
wanted to achieve greatness and lost his way. I had initially hoped to give off an "After the goal
of writing and drawing a successful comic or TV show had been completed and reached" vibe,
after career or major project. Posthumous perspective, or at least post career. I had little
conception those "future afterthoughts" would grow and flourish into the bulk of my creative
work: Creative nonfiction. Memoirs. I wanted to start working on a career retrospective early, as
I was so certain I had a career and franchise ahead of me, I had no clue how far I was putting the
cart before the horse. I put the horse 20 states ahead of the cart. Thousands of pages. I guess I

P a g e | 912

just kind of assumed I'd automatically reach the finish line, and failed to take into account how
many runners never actually reach that point.
Journals is probably mostly a very well written organizational career miscalculation. A
misplanned project.
***
Friday, January 17th, 2014, (9:44 p.m.),
The only secret to writing that novel book is to write that novel book. Make a habit out of writing
both books and novels. 200-400 pagers. Short, but sweet. Start off with a bunch of different one
part and serial one-pager to multi-pager short stories, and gradually expand upward as the page
count slowly rises over the years. And if you get bored doing that, rewrite, edit, revise, and
proofread your existing stories and journals.
One of the only ways to write fiction is full frontal. Just scribble or type up everything that
comes into your head and enters your mind, regardless of how much sense it makes or it sounds
lame or stupid or childish or anything. None of that matters. The only way I published 6 of my
own books already was to never be too harsh of an inner voice when I was writing it, just letting
the words and paragraphs flow. The book can be edited once it is written, but honestly it's easiest
to write a novel the same way writers like Jack Kerouac did, where you're just spewing words
and sentences on the page with no restrictions, inhibitions, or limitations. If you allow yourself
freedom to just write without worrying about your voice or how good the first sentence and intro
paragraph sounds, whether it's dialogue, description, or a limerick, you're on the right track.
Books are written by writing and taking action, sitting down to type. NOT Worrying about doing
the writing well or perfectly. My first drafts are the stupidest things in the world. As well they
should be, because that's how books get written, by NOT paying attention to errors or
miswriting things. As a writer, you need to realize that in terms of writing things down with the
first paragraph, every word (whether factual or fictional) most certainly does NOT count. That
would be writing the final draft, but you never have to make every word count in the beginning.
All you have to do is thinking up some catch initial sentence and paragraphs.
There are an a lot of instructional and academic books and articles written on writing. But
writing is like martial arts. It can only be learned and absorbed through attempts and actions,
both failed and successful. No amount of study can substitute can substitute for hours of hard
work at the word processor put in. In other words, Action. Action is a means to an end.
Saturday, January 18th, 2014, (2:27 p.m.)
Oh! So THAT'S the secret to writing and drawing a "Bestseller"!
I know the secret now!

P a g e | 913

Just make you writing and art really, really HORRIBLE, and you'll sell a zillion copies!
Jenius!
***
"All this negativity towards real creativity, artists, and art, isn't easy to digest, and as much as we
want happiness through our art, social rejection can be painful in many of the same ways
physical pain hurts. Rejection and Mockery are a valid form of physical pain and injury.
However, on the bright side, a Cornell study makes the face (case) that social rejection is not
actually bad for the creative process, and can even facilitate, encourage, empower, and
strengthen it. Truth is, if you feel you don't or might not belong, the act of being rejected
confirms your suspicion."
Sometimes we need rejection and detachment to learn not to conform to the level or form of our
peers, so we stop bothering to try to fit in and allow ourselves isolation and protection and the
individuality and motivation and satisfaction with ourselves and our place in life, which allows
me to pursue my own interests, not the interests of my family, fans, or public / media / culture.
"Perhaps for some people, the pain of rejection is like the pain of working hard and training /
practicing for a marathon, training the mind and body to build up and accept 10 to 30 year long
stamina and endurance. Research shows you'll need it."
Truly creative ideas take a long time to be accepted, often outlasting many of our own lifetimes.
Unlike Japan, in America, the better the idea is, the longer of a span of time on the calendar or
the more years it can and will take.
"Even the work of Nobel Prize Winners was commonly rejected by their peers for an extended
period of time"
Creating great comics, novels, scripts, and art takes a couple decades, at the very least.
On a technical level, I don't know how to be a comic book artist or novelist.
All I know how to be is a screenwriter. But hey, if all I know how to be is a screenwriter, at least
I'm good at it. At least I'm mastering it. I'm a Master Screenwriter in the future.
***
Monday, January 20th, 2014, (5:40 p.m.),
In terms of visual planning for End Times, I'm the main planner. In America you can pick one
thing and be good at it. Maybe even get away with that if you're lazy and lucky. But in Europe,
and Japan, a head Writer, Director, and Planner (Executive Producer) is expected to have a heavy
hand in all main areas of the three stages of production: Especially pre-production (Script, Story,

P a g e | 914

Boards, Model Sheets, Image Boards, Lighting Concept Design, Fashion, Art Direction,
Mechanical Design, if any mechanical design). In Professional anime, you're expected to build
everything yourself from the ground up, in record time, which means everything has to be
mapped out precisely. Thomas Romain's work on Oban and for Satelight studio is a great
example of the kind of production scaling I'm talking about. Thomas represents the polymath
animation generation of Western designer and creator. But I'm more heavily involved in story
and visuals. That's a bit different than what Thomas worked on at Gobelins and Oban, where he
focused exclusively on the form and emotions of the visuals, and Savin worked out scripts.
Too many showrunners in America are in too much of a hurry to just phone it in, and shove their
notes, sketches, and script scenes off to someone else. Not every showrunner has such a luxury.
Like myself for instance. Because of how limited my industry social resources are, I'm forced to
tackled a lot of things that in an ideal world I'd love to let someone else handle who's craftier at
that sort of thing. No such luxury for me.
I've got to draw, design, build, and flesh out a lot of topics and characters, and props, and
backgrounds, and story elements (visual elements and things) that at one point I just assumed I
wouldn't need to draw and render things myself. Like chase scenes, explosions, architecture,
secondary characters, The Apocalypse, buildings, vehicles, and creatures.
Fortunately, what would otherwise be an overwhelming task becomes much easier with enough
research, master studies, books, tutorial websites, DVDs, online videos, comics, art books, and
reference material. It feels like "cheating", but it's not. It only FEELS like you're cheating, but
that doesn't mean it is. It means I'm thinking smarter. Not crappier and cheaper.
(7:44 p.m.)
There, spent all day working on revising and editing my script. The script is essentially done,
with some rearrangement left to do.
For the rest of the pilot, it's going to require more production and pre-production artwork of stuff
like storyboards and background designs and character designs of minor chracters, and
thumbnails and gestures, and martial arts. Really go back and polish off my script by giving it
some visual closure. Must remember to seek out reference art and photos.
The Third Beat of my Scene Trinity of Difficult Scenes...is Completed!1 Down. 2 to Go. Then,
or maybe even before that point, it's all about going back to mapping out and fleshing out the
forms, scene setting, conceptual design, and visuals for the pilot with image boards, thumbs
sequences, and storyboards. Let's wrap this up!
The unfortunate reality, of Japan, of Hollywood, of comic books, of animation, and of L.A., is
society never celebrates those who hope to achieve but haven't yet, or those who are working
hard. Society in this world, especially in the west and Asia, only celebrates those who have

P a g e | 915

finished work. Only those who completed a project (more than likely a long time ago) are
celebrated. In other words, because their job was already done on any one particular projects a
long time ago, it's people getting rewarded for doing nothing other than having already done
something at a time when they were still being treated like everyone else, because they hadn't
completed something. It's weird!
I guess that's what I like to call "Finisher's Anxiety". "Finish Line Syndrome". The isolation and
guilt getting the job successfully done can take you into.
***
Tuesday, January, 21st, 2014, (3:07),
I'm making a lot of recent progress with my screenwriting duties and requirements. If only
drawing came as easy to me as screenwriting.
I'm on the Third Draft of my Spec Script (my first major script). It's turning out just as well as I
hoped of it, if not a lot more. I feel like George Lucas...in a sense. But only I'm not writing a
trilogy. I'm writing a serial. A saga. A Mythos. Just as was initially planned. Despite a lot of
drama and obstacles put forth by my peers in my personal and career life, I'm still prospering and
making a lot of progress.
Out of the Foundation of my First Initial Script will come many things, more than likely. I'm
glad I worked so hard and with such intensity and solitude on it. I began conceptualizing the first
script and building and drafting it, making story outlines and notations for it in 2012, and it kind
of snowballed from there. 2 years after the fact, here I am in January of 2014 with a nearly
complete, 3rd Draft, perhaps Final Draft script, depending on how producers and agents perceive
it.
Out of this project will emerge a new screenwriting and animation story and visual cinemaliterary science-fantasy epic genre. As much as I want to say "This task isn't to be taken lightly",
I have to take the task of drafts lightly as I'm not going to get any work done if I'm like the
majority of young writers and take the bulk of things too seriously.
I'm an American-International screenwriter "pioneer and revolutionary", as they say in the book
"Understanding Comics."
***
Wednesday, January 22nd, 2014, (11:36 a.m.),
Now I'm the breadwinner. In 10 years, I'll be the richest guy in my family. I'll be richer than my
brother and both my parents. A successful screenwriting career pays really well. 5, 6, 7,
sometimes 8 figure salaries

P a g e | 916

I got the most amazing thing in the mail today. A package of 2 expensive books and a mini
Minion USB Flash Drive, one book on drawing manga (The Complete Guide to Drawing Manga
by Sonia Leong), and another book on drawing comics (The Complete Guide to Figure Drawing
For Comics and Graphic Novels), courtesy of my good friend, former editor-in-chief of
Animation Magazine, Ramin Zahed. He hooked me up with some really cool stuff today. It was
sent courtesy of Ramin by overnight delivery and everything. These are the perks that go with
knowing a famous magazine editor in Los Angeles. I'm getting free gifts from him now related to
stuff I really like. He's so very kind and generous with me. I sent him a thank you note in return.
***
Friday, January 24th, 2014, (4:34 p.m.),
Woo-hoo! My family was contacted by Arbitron-Nielson Media Research today! I got $10 from
them for free! It's essentially a job like being a survey taker. Neilson pays me to watch TV! They
respect people's privacy, and they pay me for my time I spend watching TV and/or listening to
radio. For me it's pretty much just the former.
***
Saturday, January 25th, 2014, (11:33 a.m.),
Oooh. Yeah. That's nice. Nielson Media is going to be paying me to watch TV as part of their
research. This is the most awesome thing I have ever heard of. Plus it makes you the most
influential TV viewer in your local community, and you get to influence what gets seen on TV.
Being driven around by my corpse of a mother and Nazi of a father is hell. Therefore it is my
2014 resolution to drive. In 2014, and for the next few years I will be doing everything in my
power to drive and get my license. So I can drive...and never come back this horrible, horrible
place. Once I leave Casselberry on my own, by plane, train, and automobile, I may never come
back. Couldn't make me happier to be very far away from here, 1300. My parents make life hell.
When are they going to die?
I'm getting my Learner's Permit for my wallet, so I can drive with someone in the car with me,
like Chris, Jean, or with an Instructor for private Driving Lessons. I'll be paying for all this with
my Master Card.
***
Sunday, January 26th, 2014 (6:25),
I know where I'll move to. An apartment. In Nona, in Medical City. It's nice and quiet out there,
with not too much noise.

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I spent the morning and afternoon constructing, building, folding, and flying paper airplanes
around my front yard and house. That was a lot of fun. A simple hobby.
Then I sat in the car with the keys in the ignition, listening to Lithium on XM Satellite Radio in
the garage, with the engine running. Figured out how to use the car to charge my cell phone, but
couldn't figure out how to run Pandora through the car stereo system. I also downloaded XM
Satellite to my smart phone. Other than that, I bought some Burger King with the money Neilson
Media paid me in the mail two or three days ago for being a Neilson decider. Also installed a
digital compass and speedometer/odometer in my smart phone.
I had an ungodly amount of fun today, just messing around without using computer consoles for
the most part. I did a lot of walking today.
Analogy Rant: The American Economy
Here is how the current political, "free" economic, and entrepreneurial system, and TAX system
works. American economics has forced us to believe that the majority of the sum of trillions of
dollars in the market should go to 3 or 4 random bureaucratic red fatcat pigs, putting them at a
99% unfair advantage, making those 3 to 4 fat cats more powerful than God himself, while a few
more hundred people get a few hundred or few thousand dollars, and the rest of the world, the 5
billion percent POPULATING this world, who suffer and work every day and struggle for their
LIVES, to make ends meet for survival (often dying and suffering) will be left out in the cold,
left to wander the streets like dogs. Technically, I'm part of that 5 billion percent. Those five
million get spat on by the higher ranking few hundred, who are given instructions to spit on the 5
billion by the 3 to 4 bureaucrats.
Justice and Political Reform: Family's of the Convicted
Honestly, I think the state government SHOULD step in and help protect family of the
incarcerated who didn't aid and abet the fathers who are now incarcerated. The fact that this
doesn't happen in life destroys countless children's futures, and worsens crime statistics in
urbanized areas. You can't blame every social problem and pitfall on inmates and their families
(by "association"). The family of a criminal isn't the one that did anything wrong, and they
should not be treated as such, and expect to have a healthy or fully functional society. If the state
can help keep the HOMELESS VAGRANTS in shelters, it can do the same for families of the
incarcerated. The state is the one who destroys and breaks up families just as much, if not five
times as much as the incarcerated themselves do. And therefore the state is destroying the lives
of countless wives and children who often have done nothing wrong themselves, other than
being raised by, associated with (against their will), or in anyway linked to incarcerated criminals
who they very well could have often had no real control over. Just because people make bad
decisions in life does NOT mean their families should always suffer unless they aided and abed
the situation. With the way America is set up, jail doesn't end the world, but the world ends in
jail. WHY??

P a g e | 918

Justice and Philosophy

It is an undeniable truth that unjustifiable homicide is wrong. But how wrong is it? How do we
define its wrongness? On what terms is it wrong? Where does one, a state, a court, a police
officer, a state judge, a local, state, and national government, define its' wrongness.
If a man kills another man, how is justice to go about punishing him? By arrest? By
incarceration? By death? Does it rely in the severity, intention, and malice of his crime?
***
Tuesday, January 26th, 2014, (1:01 a.m.)
I'm finally loosening up a bit. Currently I'm leading a more active life. Less computer and
internet and TV. More family time. Did some interesting things. Looked through the old family
photo album, which mom says will become mine and Andrew's when she passes on. I took some
pictures of myself in my parents' car. And I scanned all my Washington D.C. photos from the
mid-90s that I took on my little camera when I was in DC, and posted them in my digital photo
album on Windows, as well as my blog, which I linked in a tweet on Twitter.
I went to the health care office around 7 a.m. with my dad in a trenchcoat and stood with some
other people at the office front door, in the rain, waiting for the office to open its doors, so we
could get to our appointment early before the day got too busy and crowded and crazy. After we
left, Dad bought me two Egg, Cheese, and Meat Biscuit sandwiches from the McDonald's drivethrough, and we drove home, because dad forgot to pencil in my haircut like he said he would, so
after we were home for 1 to 2 hours or so, where I got another hour or two of sleep and woke up
right around noon, me and Dad drove off to the Publix Plaza where I always get my hair cut, and
I got to meet my newest barber. I kept her business card in my wallet. She's got some cool tattoos
on her arms, and dresses in all black. She told me stuff about herself, I told her stuff about
myself. We kind of hit it off, and she rinsed my scalp too. Relaxing. Niiiiice.
Watched a little bit of Undercover Boss with Mom and Dad. I decided to do some parent son
bonding by watching television together, like Andrew and I (when Andrew was still living here
with me) used to do all the time with Mom and Dad when we were a better family.
1 a.m. - The Parents were nestled, all snug in their king size bed, while visions of sugar plumbs
danced in their heads
It's true what they say about writing and being a writer: Leading an active life helps increase the
potency of your writing work. It gives you inspiration and subject matter to write about.
I visited Washington, D.C. in Maryland, on a class fieldtrip in the year 1997. I know I traveled
by bus in the year 1997, for an entirely different reason. That was the year I heard one of my first

P a g e | 919

albums as a teenager that changed my life as a music fan: Radiohead's OK Computer album.
Driving cross country from Florida to Maryland while listing to the "Airbag" track from the
Radiohead album OK Computer while looking out at the darkened dawn of a world traveling
past me was one of the most beautiful moments I've ever had. That's one of the best opening
tracks I've ever heard, and if you haven't heard it, always listen to it while being driven around
on the interstate in a bus or car. The "Buzzworthy" MTV Music Video for "Karma Police" was
also on the TV in the hotel room I stayed in with two of my friends / classmates when we had
almost reached Maryland.
***
Tuesday, January 28th, 2014, (1:40 p.m.),
Profession: Cartoonist. Author. Writer. Pirate. Hero.
***
Wednesday, January 29th, 2014 (9:29 PM)
There's a new academic computer science website out there, that's endorsed by such
programming luminaries as Mark Zuckerberg and Bill Gates: Code.org. It's designed and
programmed with an easy to learn interface, with the computer science beginning student (i.e.
me) in mind. Code.org is something a curious student could probably put a lot of time into and
get pretty good as an amateur or advanced programmer, if they put enough effort into it.
I feel like comparing Miyazaki and Moebius and Otomo is odd in some ways. As skilled and
talented and visionary as Miyazaki is, I feel he seems to be respected by Asians and the
Academy more for his "charisma and cult of persona" than any of his actual works or art. I
hardly even know what his authentic style even looks like. All I know of him is the hype mostly.
He's respected for his personality more than his art (much like my own hero, John Lasseter),
meanwhile Moebius and Otomo are respected more for their art than their "charisma and
persona". I have to know what an artist's art looks like (not what they look like) in order to truly
understand them. It's hard to do that with Miyazaki with all the hype he gets.
"Turn the other cheek. Love Thy Neighbor"
-Jesus H. Christ
The Bible

P a g e | 920
"First, we must develop and maintain the capacity to forgive. He who is devoid of the
power to forgive is devoid of the power to love. It is impossible even to begin the act of
loving one's enemies without the prior acceptance of the necessity, over and over again,
of forgiving those who inflict evil and injury upon us. It is also necessary to realize that
the forgiving act must always be initiated by the person who has been wronged, the
victim of some great hurt, the recipient of some tortuous injustice, the absorber of some
terrible act of oppression. The wrongdoer may request forgiveness. He may come to
himself, and, like the prodigal son, move up some dusty road, his heart palpitating with
the desire for forgiveness. But only the injured neighbor, the loving father back home,
can really pour out the warm waters of forgiveness.
Forgiveness does not mean ignoring what has been done or putting a false label on an
evil act. It means, rather, that the evil act no longer remains as a barrier to the
relationship. Forgiveness is a catalyst creating the atmosphere necessary for a fresh
start and a new beginning. It is the lifting of a burden or the canceling of a debt. The
words "I will forgive you, but I'll never forget what you've done" never explain the real
nature of forgiveness. Certainly one can never forget, if that means erasing it totally from
his mind. But when we forgive, we forget in the sense that the evil deed is no longer a
mental block impeding a new relationship. Likewise, we can never say, "I will forgive
you, but I won't have anything further to do with you." Forgiveness means reconciliation,
a coming together again.
Without this, no man can love his enemies. The degree to which we are able to forgive
determines the degree to which we are able to love our enemies.
Second, we must recognize that the evil deed of the enemy-neighbor, the thing that
hurts, never quite expresses all that he is. An element of goodness may be found even in
our worst enemy. Each of us has something of a schizophrenic personality, tragically
divided against ourselves. A persistent civil war rages within all of our lives. Something
within us causes us to lament with Ovid, the Latin poet, "I see and approve the better
things, but follow worse," or to agree with Plato that human personality is like a
charioteer having two headstrong horses, each wanting to go in a different direction, or
to repeat with the Apostle Paul, "The good that I would I do not: but the evil which I
would not, that I do."
This simply means that there is some good in the worst of us and some evil in the best of
us. When we discover this, we are less prone to hate our enemies. When we look
beneath the surface, beneath. the impulsive evil deed, we see within our enemyneighbor a measure of goodness and know that the viciousness and evilness of his acts
are not quite representative of all that he is. We see him in a new light. We recognize
that his hate grows out of fear, pride, ignorance, prejudice, and misunderstanding, but
in spite of this, we know God's image is ineffably etched in being. Then we love our
enemies by realizing that they are not totally bad and that they are not beyond the
reach of God's redemptive love.
Third, we must not seek to defeat or humiliate the enemy but to win his friendship and
understanding. At times we are able to humiliate our worst enemy. Inevitably, his weak
moments come and we are able to thrust in his side the spear of defeat. But this we
must not do. Every word and deed must contribute to an understanding with the enemy

P a g e | 921
and release those vast reservoirs of goodwill which have been blocked by impenetrable
walls of hate.
Let us move now from the practical how to the theoretical why: Why should we love our
enemies? The first reason is fairly obvious. Returning hate for hate multiplies hate,
adding deeper darkness to a night already devoid of stars. Darkness cannot drive out
darkness; only light can do that. Hate cannot drive out hate; only love can do that. Hate
multiplies hate, violence multiplies violence, and toughness multi# plies toughness in a
descending spiral of destruction.
So when Jesus says "Love your enemies," he is setting forth a profound and ultimately
inescapable admonition. Have we not come to such an impasse in the modern world that
we must love our enemies-or else? The chain reaction of evil-hate begetting hate, wars
producing more wars-must be broken, or we shall be plunged into the dark abyss of
annihilation.
Another reason why we must love our enemies is that hate scars the soul and distorts
the personality. Mindful that hate is an evil and dangerous force, we too often think of
what it does to the person hated. This is understandable, for hate brings irreparable
damage to its victims. We have seen its ugly consequences in the ignominious deaths
brought to six million Jews by hate-obsessed madman named Hitler, in the unspeakable
violence inflicted upon Negroes by bloodthirsty mobs, in the dark horrors of war, and in
the terrible indignities and injustices perpetrated against millions of God's children by
unconscionable oppressors.
But there is another side which we must never overlook. Hate is just as injurious to the
person who hates. Like an unchecked cancer, hate corrodes the personality and eats
away its vital unity. Hate destroys a man's sense of values and his objectivity. It causes
him to describe the beautiful as ugly and the ugly as beautiful, and to confuse the true
with the false and the false with the true.
A third reason why we should love our enemies is that love is the only force capable of
transforming an enemy into a friend. We never get rid of an enemy by meeting hate with
hate; we get rid of an enemy by getting rid of enmity. By its very nature, hate destroys
and tears down; by its very nature, love creates and builds up. Love transforms with
redemptive power.
The relevance of what I have said to the crisis in race relations should be readily
apparent. There will be no permanent solution to the, race problem until oppressed men
develop the capacity to love their enemies. The darkness of racial injustice will be
dispelled only by the light of forgiving love. For more than three centuries American
Negroes have been battered by the iron rod of oppression, frustrated by day and
bewildered by night by unbearable injustice and burdened with the ugly weight of
discrimination. Forced to live with these shameful conditions, we are tempted to become
bitter and to retaliate with a corresponding hate. But if this happens, the new order we
seek will be little more than a duplicate of the old order. We must in strength and
humility meet hate with love.

P a g e | 922
My friends, we have followed the so-called practical way for too long a time now, and it
has led inexorably to deeper confusion and chaos. Time is cluttered with the wreckage
of communities which surrendered to hatred and violence. For the salvation of our nation
and the salvation of mankind, we must follow another way.
While abhorring segregation, we shall love the segregationist. This is the only way to
create the beloved community.
To our most bitter opponents we say: "We shall match your capacity to inflict suffering
by our capacity to endure suffering. We shall meet your physical force with soul force.
Do to us what you will, and we shall continue to love you. We cannot in all good
conscience obey your unjust laws because noncooperation with evil is as much a moral
obligation as is cooperation with good. Throw us in jail and we shall still love you. Bomb
our homes and threaten our children, and we shall still love you. Send your hooded
perpetrators of violence into our community at the midnight hour and beat us and leave
us half dead, and we shall still love you. But be ye assured that we will wear you down
by our capacity to suffer. One day we shall win freedom but not only for ourselves. We
shall so appeal to your heart and conscience that we shall win you in the process and
our victory will be a double victory."
-"Loving Your Enemies"
A Sermon by Martin Luther King, Jr.

***
Thursday, January 30th, 2014,
It's early, and I've had some time for reflection.
I've come to realize even the most prolific comic book artists had assistants. Including Osamu
Tezuka, Katsuhiro Otomo, and Dave Sim. Otomo and Sim's output was closer to 1,200 - 3,000
pages of comics art than it was to being 2,400 - 6,000 pages of comics art. This is because they
used assistants to complete their books. If they were truly operating completely alone all the
time, the number of pages would be a lot lower.
And that's a load off my shoulders. All this time I thought I had to reach the "6,000 page finish
line" all on my own. Yeah right. More like 1,000 - 3,000 page finish line.
Though the workload miracle I had been hoping to recreate turned out to be somewhat untrue, it
doesn't take away from the achievements of either Sim or Otomo. Even if they only did half as
much work on their projects as I imagined they did, they're still to be respected, and still two of
the highest level geniuses at what they do, and they still have the greatest work ethic. They still
did a ton of work. Just not as much as I initially assumed they did. I assumed every page they
authored was drawn 100% by them and only them.

P a g e | 923

It's like magic. You're amazed by the artist's magic trick. But don't come crying to the illusionist
if you have the opportunity to learn the secret of the illusion.
My goal is to compete at least 300 to 500 pages of work by the end or middle of this year. Either
August or December. I'll be putting my artwork in a folder and marking that folder. If I do a
couple pages of art a day, I'll have at least 400 pages of artwork completed, if not a lot more. But
then again it's not just about keeping a schedule. It's about making you're work look good.
Thomas Romain himself said I draw a lot. And he's Thomas Romain: The Artist Man Who
Draws Everything Himself! He drew the majority of the pre-production for Oban Star-Racers,
singlehandedly! I don't necessarily think of myself when I think of drawing a lot, even if it is
true.
YES! I have mastered all the fundamental skills of animation pre-production:

Script
Character Design
Conceptual Design
Production Design
Boards, and Comics

I've done a little bit of everything, and a lot of some things.

Complex Problems I've solved. Complex Problems I'm still solving:

How to master Design.

How to master illustration.
How to Draw a Comic Book Page.
How to Draw a Comic Book Panel.
How to Write a Perfect Animation Spec Pilot Script.
How to Write a Perfect Script.
How to Become Successful and Wealthy Through Hard Work and Perseverance.
How to Draw and Write 3,000 pages of comics, art, and narrative or more.
How to United More Than One Country to Produce International Animated Cinema.
How to Successfully Co-Produce a Co-Production with France and Japan.
How to Meet Famous, Powerful Allies.
How to Become Powerful.
How to Achieve Perfect Strategy and Perfect Precision.
How to Write a Successful Business Plan.
How to Run a Media and Animation Studio.
How to Become a Millionaire Through Hard Work With Patience and Perseverance.
How to Create and Develop an Epic Mythos and Create a Profit With it

P a g e | 924

How to Drive

Things I came to Learn (And Eventually...Master)

Computer Science Student Manual

Internet Science Student Manual
Typing - Meavis Beacon School of Typing
File Management
Uploading Videos Online
Print-On-Demand Self Publishing
Writing
DVD Recording from TV
DVD Ripping
Journaling
Screenwriting
Drawing and Designing
Organic Architecture Design
Anime
French BD

I don't mean to be paranoid or anything, but Man! Competition can be Murder on the Nerves!
I like the titles they use for the Alex Toth trilogy of biographical art books:
Alex Toth:

Genius: Isolated (Life) (Life Lived)

Genius: Illustrated (Comics) (Life on the page)
Genius: Animated (Animation) (Life on the Screen)

Story of my life. It's the same thing with Jhonen, Otomo, Miyazaki, and Tezuka and Disney and
Windsor McCay!
I create my distinctive style of art, filmmaking, publishing, distribution, and writing, outside the
boundaries of the paid, professional world. It's a tough, and often hazardous road, but one well
worth traversing.
Friday, January 31st, 2014 (3:02 PM)
I think Shinichiro Watanabe, Thomas Romain, and Williams Street / Toonami are doing a
mighty fine job with their new series, Space Dandy. It's all just...Dandy.

P a g e | 925

I made my first formal script submission to a Hollywood Agency today. ATL (Above the Line). I
can either wait to submit to more places and get back to work on my script, or I can do some
more digging and investigating into who's looking for unsolicited scripts. But the thing about
scripts is, before studios see page one of a script, they want to hear loglines and pitches first.
They need to know if they like the way you write in general. There's other factors at work than
just the script itself.
I have quite the collection of favorite screenwriters and cinematic scribes now:

Dai Sato
Aaron McGruder
Mario Puzo
Savin Yeatman-Eiffel
Yoshiyuki Tomino
Tarantino
John Woo
David Chase
George RR Martin

Honestly, I know I'm in the midst of the script submissions process, and will continue to contact
literary agencies for potential work...But, at the same time my first script is not entirely
complete. There's no stroyboards to go with it, and it still has some holes in the plot. Needs a bit
more work in my opinion, but that's not to say someone wouldn't be interested in optioning it for
the screen somewhere. Plus, I told myself I'd develop numerous scripts, not just one, but that
would mean I'd probably have less time available to develop continuing serial story scripts. So, I
either keep writing scripts, or keep contacting more agencies on my contact list. Or a
combination of the two.
And honestly, I don't do all this for power. That would be strange.
I do it because I have a compelling story to tell, and an agency can help manifest that vision.
YouTube taught me a valuable lesson. Having a lot of power in the media, as I once did, creates
many enemies, both locally and nationally. Nationally and internationally. Back in 2006-2012, I
reigned like an Angry God over the Media Landscape. I had all the power in the world with
SplitAtomBoom, and I constantly sensed people were out to take that away from me. Viacom in
particular felt very threatened by my power, which was one element they wished they could
conceal at the time. How afraid they were afraid of my media power. I fended them off for a
good long while. But in the end, I lost my raw power when YouTube itself shut down my pirate
channel.

P a g e | 926

I already mastered the internet. I earned $120, and attain an obscene amount of power and
influence and fame in the media, with an online worldwide audience of more than half a million
viewers online. But I never had tangible success.
I've decided I want to set my sights on more old fashioned industries in one sense, that provide
me something I'd like to get a lot more than symbolic and metaphorical success. Success with
tangible, quantifiable, economical results, that does have the raw nerve tell you if you succeeded
or failed. But that's just me. I like success with pragmatic application. I like results that can be
documented and measured.
I am a "Hidden Fortress of Money-Generating Power".
L.A. Agents (though largely unseen and invisible onscreen) is one of the richest most powerful
professions in all of Los Angeles. Some would say "The most" rich and powerful.
I took a powerful first step in my career in show business today. The last day of January 2014 on
the Eve of February 2014, was the first time I reached out to contact an L.A. agency. But clearly,
this is not an overnight thing.

P a g e | 927

Chapter 7

P a g e | 928

Saturday, February 1st, 2014, (10:24 AM),

Old manga title: End Times / The Chronicles of Mono Jubei
New Title: Legends of New-Earth
I contacted Affinity Artists Agency (ET: The Extra Terrestrial, Star Wars: Episode 1, Criminal
Minds) to see if I could send them my script. I also contacted Above the Line Agency (agency of
Gregory Widen: screenwriter and creator of the Highlander franchise) before I contacted AAA.
I know, I make some very hard things look "very easy to do", even though they aren't easy to do.
Like writing, for example!
Types of agents:

Actor agents
Novelist Agents
Comic Book Agents
Spec Script Agents
Animation Agents
Screenplay Agents
Live Action Writer Agents
People who do a little of everything

Wi-Fi (wireless) is the greatest anti-hacking PC security technology solution there is currently,
this side of buying a Macbook. My Wi-Fi USB device was a sound security investment.
--------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------Sunday, February 2nd, 2014, (4:11 PM),
My Journals, my Narratives, and my Sketchbook Archives are my Multimedia Monuments of the
page. They are My Own Personal Monuments that I built with a pencil, pens, and a keyboard.
From online 2013 French TV Animation article.
Ultimately, trans-Atlantic link-ups between France and American talent are all
about combining the best of both worlds, says Sandrine Nguyen, who runs
Genao with Boris Hertzog and is producing Chipmunks and Xiaolin. In
France, we have great animation schools, as well as talented directors and
character designers but we still have a lot to learn from American storyboard
artists and scriptwriters .
Though I'm not a big fan of most traditionalist American screenwriters of animation on TV,
writers of mature dramatic series such as Tron, Motorcity, Star Wars: The Clone Wars, G.I. Joe

P a g e | 929

Resolute, Toonami, Dave Willis, ZIM, The Boondocks, Batman, Teen Titans, and Spawn
provide some of the best scripts in the history of animation, both classical and contemporary.
America and Japanese TV provide good, strong stories, scripts, and storyboards a fair amount
of the time. But the best written most well storyboarded shows are not always recognized by the
otaku and fan communities. They're more highly acknowledged among peers and industry
colleagues and trade publications.
And his analysis of France's strengths in TV animation are also correct: France offers great
cinematic auteur filmmaking styles, production design, and character design(ers).
When collaborating with other studios and countries, always know each side's strongest areas,
and work to combine and integrate strong elements to with collaborators' specialties and
strengths. Don't focus too much on weakness. Don't promote weak areas, Have faith in your
collaborators to pick up the slack with areas they have strength in where our team doesn't
--------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------Speaking of difficult areas of pre-production and publishing. Whether you're a storyboard artist
or a sequential artist, or cartoonist, or comic book artist, you're skill set invariably comes down
to a handful of structural and compositional draftsmanship elements that boil down to one skill
and craft:
"Telling A Visual Narrative Story With 3-Dimensional 2-D Pictorial Compositions in Panels"
While the panels will often vary and not end up the same size, drawing comics and storyboards
takes the same skill set, as probably most perfectly demonstrated by Katsuhiro Otomo in his
manga and anime productions. He's probably the greatest cinematic motion anime adapter of his
own literary "static" comics work. There's a REASON he's won so many animation and comic
book awards in both mediums. He sets the greatest executive precision and accuracy of
transferring his storytelling vision from page to screen. The only artists who come close to
achieving that are Bruce Timm, Jamie Hewlett, and Jhonen Vasquez.
That's one element that sets artists like Hayao Miyazaki and Katsuhiro Otomo apart from 98% of
all other artists. They made that turbulent cross-medium transition. They weathered the storm
that is transitioning from illustrator and cartoonist to filmmaker and animator. Most other artists
just don't bother to ever venture to go there. Instead of transitioning between mediums and their
respective worlds and designed that bridge between worlds entirely by themselves. That takes
getting out of your niche and comfort zone and exploring and building a secondary and entirely
new one.

P a g e | 930

Walt Disney, Windsor McCay, Osamu Tezuka, Hayao Miyazaki, Katsuhiro Otomo, Matt
Groening, Todd McFarlane, Jhonen Vasquez, Jamie Hewlett, and even arguably Bruce Timm
(cuz he did the same thing sort of, but in reverse) all belong to a newly emerging category of
artists I am thinking up a new name for. They are masters of adapting their style to suit the
medium of their choice. I will call this medium-bending storyteller and artist:
Transitioners: This kind of artist is able to adapt from drawing and/or writing specifically for
comics to writing and drawing in animation, and making the transition smoothly and
successfully.
Transitioning: Switching from working and/or training from comics to animation, or manga to
anime, and vice versa.
Transitioners are usually innovative, creative, adventurous, and ingenious pioneers and often the
first of their kind, and get to explore territories few other artists see.
--------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------Yeah, Wikipedia kind of sucks ass and is a bunch of dirty, condescending liars, pseudo-scholars
and intellectual cheats. I've got a billion better things to do than sit on my ass and wait around
until a million years from now for Wikipedia or IMDB to write about me in a crappy (probably
inaccurate and poorly-researched) article somewhere. HUGE waste of time. Sorry Jay Meyers,
but you're wasting your overabundant time. If it was up to me I'd write about myself and do their
neglected job for them. Oh wait, that's right, you're not allowed to write about yourself on
Wikipedia anymore. It's against their very biased policy. You're forced to pretend like you don't
think about yourself. What a crock of fuggin' bullshit.
Screenwriting's tricky. Tricky as in even some of the biggest power players in L.A., actors and
artists, have no clue how one goes about selling their script to Hollywood. You can ask a
hundred different people about how to sell a script, they will each give you a hundred different
answers. Not just a hundred different answers, but a hundred different, very WRONG answers.
Even the books on screenwriting give you fifty different answers and all tell you the wrong thing
to do. You learn as you go.
You learn from experience. Not by getting advice. For all you know, every specific answer you
get from someone could be a misleading, FALSE answer, especially in online forums, where
there's very little actual industry experience to go around.
---------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

P a g e | 931

Monday, February 3rd, 2014, (4:25 PM),

I know the rules.
I have, own, write, and collect a rulebook, guidebook, Strategy Guide, How-To Manual, and
Technical Manual for almost anything. Especially the things I'm good at.
I like applying systems and components theory to not just engineering, but storytelling, comics,
animation, and filmmaking. Nearly any mode of visualization and storytelling can and should be
divided up into components that interact with one another. Components of Design. Components
of narrative storytelling. It's the rules.
Rich people lecturing poor people about money is against the rules of sportsmanship.
--------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------Tuesday, February 4th, 2014, (5:12 PM),
Oh hell yes. I'm participating in a special study around my house. Essentially, I'm getting paid a
fair amount of money just to sit around the house, listen to radio, and watch TV!
So now there's Broadcasting on the SplitAtomBoom and ActionToonTV franchise, special
studies, my self-published books, my comics, and my screenwriting I'm working to sell the rights
to.
If I could just get over my minutia and paneling minutia phobia, it would liberate and
revolutionize the quality of my visual narratives, paneling compositions, and comic book
narrative style. I'd go from amateur to pro in my mind in no time! Fortunately, I seem to have
developed a panel desensitization and phobia elimination technique, and am doing just that as I
write this! I can't wait to try it out. Maybe tonight, maybe tomorrow afternoon. You never know.
Storyboard Rulebooks:

Writing and Illustrating the Graphic Novel

The Complete Guide to Figure Drawing for Comics and Graphic Novels
The Complete Guide to Drawing Manga
Prepare to Board! Creating Story and Characters For Animated Features & Shorts
Directing The Story: Professional Storytelling and Storyboarding Techniques for Live
Action and Animation
How to Draw Comics The Marvel Way
Understanding Comics
Drawing Words & Writing Pictures
Batman: Animated
Katsuhiro Otomo: Steamboy Storyboards

P a g e | 932

Katsuhiro Otomo: Genga: Original Pictures

--------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------Wednesday, February 5th, 2014, (4:44 PM),

Storyboard Notes:

Drawing Through the Panel (think outside the panel box)

Draw and full scale, then draw a box within the composition
180 Degree Rule. Right Stays to Right Side. Left stays to Left Side.

--------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------People in showbusiness who know about my evil twin/double "Marketing Parody PR" situation:

Uncle Grandpa
Williams Street
Cartoon Network
Steve Blum
Dan Stone
Production I.G.
JG Quintel
Todd McFarlane
The Hub
Lauren Faust
Warner Brothers (Teen Titans)
YouTube
The Boondocks
Seth MacFarlane
Seth Green
Titmouse
Bruce Willis

People who "Exploit the Doubles and Evil Twins", and in some instances, create them
intentionally:

NBC
Comedy Central
Viacom
Nickelodeon
CNN

P a g e | 933

MSNBC
Disney
History Channel

In the eyes of many in the media, "internet celebrity" is just a more PC terms for "spoiled,
certifiable loser," "trend, fad" and not much more. Internet celebrity is down there with reality
TV celebrity and topical news story celebrity, or even sports celebrity.
Of course, I may just be taking all of this for granted of course, because technically I myself
qualify as an internet authority figure and celebrity. One of great media fame and renown.
---------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------Friday, February 7th, 2014, (10:03 PM),
You're in the big leagues now kid, and the way you've been approaching your grunt work is
laughable. What you can't even figure out if you've done a decent job on a drawing. You still
need to show every drawing you do for Mommy and Daddy to say "Great job. Keep it up." every
time?? And when's the last time they said something encouraging when you showed them a
sketch. Stop relying on Mummy and Daddy for approval. It's shameful. And a little pathetic.
Even you admit they never actually said anything encouraging to you about your art in the last
10 years, and yet they're the first people you show you're new drawings to every time you DO a
new drawing. Makes me wanna puke. Like they could EVER vindicate you're career. They're
doing nothing but slowing you down. Stop seeking out them for approval just because they're
your roommates. Mommy and Daddy will NEVER approve of ANYTHING creative you do.
And hence...I've reached a solution to my internet and parental woes.
And that is to revitalize 2 of my best and oldest friendships, this side of Amanda and Nicole.
Chris and Jonny. Chris Hess and Jonny Bartlett. Turns out we're just as good of friends now as
we were in middle school. I'll just show my art to Chris and Jonny. Both humorous guys with a
great sense of humor. Both macho men. Both masculine like myself. We're guys' guys. They can
both drive. They both have High IQs, and have high amounts of intelligence. It'll be fun to see if
I can manage to re-integrate my 2 best and oldest male friends back into my current life. In the
modern era. Last time I got to chill with those guys, it was the 1990s. They're two of my best,
oldest friends. Blast from the past!
A lots changed in this world since the era of me and my best friends: the 1990s. Back when me,
Chris, and Jonny were all students in the same gifted middle school class(es).

P a g e | 934

Tuesday, February 11th, 2014, (3:00),

Sooooo. FINALLY! I've finally decided on and announced a broadcasting schedule for myself!
Weekdays: Noon and to Early-Mid Afternoon (around 1-4 hours of airtime
Friday Nights: Primetime, from 7-10 p.m.
Turns out I'll have the broadcasting equipment available earlier than anticipated. My budget just
got a windfall from my current activities. So no more waiting as long as I do just to get $100.
The budget. MY budget ($100 / month) doubled.
--------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------Who has online fans and who doesn't:
Famous People With Fanboys/girls:

Me
Eminem
Jhonen
Trent Reznor
Ask a Ninja
FUNimation
Toonami
Anime
Star Wars
Tron
Cartoon Network
Piro
Batman
Todd McFarlane
Steve Blum
Thomas Romain

People who don't have devoted fanboys/girls:

People with little to no online comments or followers online or at conventions.
Wowee Zowee! Hey, thanks neighborhood bullies and Viacom! I make over $200 a month now
and it's all (not) thanks to u!

P a g e | 935

Thursday, February 13th, 2014,

I'm going to be in the Carolinas with an old friend for at least a few days to a week. But before I
do that I'm refurbishing my laptop.
But obviously, this whole "moving thing" is gonna take at least a little bit of prep work and
planning. I'm aware there are people spying on me, eavesdropping in all of my conversations
around my house, conspiring against me getting ANYthing done, let alone traveling, so I proceed
with caution. All this conspiring against me, and yet I STILL get ahead. That's a fact of life.
They lose, I win. That's how it's always been, that is how it will always be as well.
Fuckers DON'T prosper. Not in the game of life anyway. Karma, Destiny, Fate, Life, and all that.
Jeez. Valentine's Day on social media in 2014 is CRAZY with a capital CRAZY. Some people
actually do take this silly holiday seriously. Odd. I never have. I'm not used to women going out
of their way for me, other than Nicole and my mom and Amanda. Other than that I never was
very popular with girls in my town.
February 17th, 2014
I created, invented, debuted, and unveiled not only my first online TV channel today this side of
YouTube. I also created and unveiled my first ever piece of homemade software today. An
application software to coincide with my web broadcasting business. ActionToonTV.com, and
ActionToonTV Mobile. I'm finally getting to create my own application software and
broadcasting network for my favorite genre of filmmaking and animation. There's a lot of
potential for growth here. My ultimate goal is to get my app listed in Droid and the Google Play
store for free. Google play gets over 8 billion downloads collectively, and has a promising future
in tech.
My cousin Chris got seriously injured on the job unfortunately, but fortunately it was not fatal
and his hand is okay. Not going into details, but my prayers go out to him. Odd timing on that,
how something so horrible could happen to him, meanwhile I've got it so incredibly easy.
Doesn't exactly seem fair to me, but there really isn't anything I can do about it other than keep
plugging away.
--------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------The future of broadcasting lies in me. And the future of application software lies in mobile
devices, smartphones, app software application downloads at places like iTunes and Google
Play. Google Play sets an outstanding example of making over 1 million apps available to
smartphones, which have downloaded those apps a total of more than 50 billion times.
I'm actually surprisingly good at this "software app developer gig" thing. Hallelujah. Amen.
Idiot's Guide / For Dummies Books to Buy:

P a g e | 936

Online Video
App Downloads
Windows Operating System

That's awesome! I know someone from The Ukraine now. Alyona, a Ukranian. She lives in
North Carolina with Chris, and manages an art gallery! So awesome. It's my first ever close
European friend. Chris Hess's wife, Alyona.
My god I love coming up with Android apps. This is a new passion of mine, that goes nearly
hand in hand with my other passions: ripping DVDs and web video, and online video
broadcasting, as well as Windows video file management. Then making an algorithm out of all
of it.
Me and my Tech Toys
Greatest Inventions in the History of Tech

ActionToonTV
Google
Webcomics Nation
Gmail
Google Sites
Amazon
Kindle Fire Publishing
Toonami Digital Arsenal
Paypal
Bank of America
Google+
Twitter
Google Play Apps
Google Play Music
Netflix
Hulu / Hulu Plus
Plex Server
Serviio DSNA Server
Google Android
LG Smartphone
Verizon
T-Mobile
Sirius XM
Pandora

P a g e | 937

Rhapsody
Blogspot
YouTube
Comixology
Graphic.ly
Lulu
Createspace
Kindle Comics Creator
Adobe
Photoshop
The Pirate Bay
BitTorrent
Forbes
GEN Manga
Adobe Flash
UStream
Livestream
Anipipo
Twitch.tv
Justin.tv
Glomera (RIP)
Ustream Producer
Wirecast
YouTube Wirecast
Roku
DVR
DirecTV
Tivo
Windows Media Player (.wmv)
Quicktime
MP3 Player
Ka-Blam publishing (iffy)
DeviantART
Pixiv
VOS Media Player
Wondershare Video Converter
Crunchyroll
MangaFox

P a g e | 938

Coursera
Rosetta Stone
Code.org
Areas I Want To Master

Gridding on paper
Mecha Design
Google Android Play Store
App Design
ActionToonTV
UStream
ToonBoom Storyboard Pro
ArtRage
Appey Pie
Wacom Tablet
PC Assembly
Coursera
Screenwriting
Outlining
1-4 hour individual drawings
Fiction Writing
Production Design
Perspective (1, 2, 3, 4 point)
Wirecast
Developing Business Plans
Attaining Patents
TV Money
Stocks
tweet marketing

P a g e | 939
[The Start of a New Stage In My Life: The Mobile App Stage]
Apparently, Mobile App revenues are now at $15 Trillion, which I read in the
latest issue of Forbes in an article about apps. That's a mile higher than
Google's initial $1.6 Billion buyout of my masterpiece, YouTube. Looks like I
got the Midas Digital Touch, again! Better not waste or advertise it.

Math Calculator Time!

$1
$10
$100
$1,000
$100,000 = 100K
$1,000,000 = (Big Business)
$100,000,000 = (Bigger Business)
$1,000,000,000 = YouTube Market (Where we were almost 10 years ago online)
$100,000,000,000 = TV and Computer Market
$1,000,000,000,000,000 = $1 Trillion (Government budgets)
$50,000,000,000,000,000 = $50 Trillion, App Market (Where We're at now)
Things are looking promising.
Bugs and Issue to work out with ActionToon Site:
(Strategic Planning, Executive Producing)

Airdates
Scheduling
Time Constraints
Timing
Viewership
Analytics
Uploading Time vs. Hard Drive Direct Broadcasting Time
Budget (How much will all combined elements cost)
Money (Earning)

P a g e | 940

Pricing
Website Maintenance
UStream Maintenance
SEO (Search Engines)
Hosting
Marketing and PR
Social Media Marketing
24-Hour Operation, Diving Days into Weeks, and Weeks into days
Schedule. Diving Hours into Half Hours and Half Hours into Hours.
Market Segment (Who's watching it)
Demographics, Metrix
Business Plan
Ripping, Downloading, and Uploading time (slowness)

--------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------I will be unveiling my invention, my newly created app online in the near future, like say, in then
next few weeks. But I got to do more uploads, and get more footage, and beta test the app
platform. Make sure it works in accordance with my pre-established website. I did a search for
"watch cartoons" and "watch anime". The only good thing that came up was the Watch CN App.
Getting listed as a Droid Developer is a big deal to many in the tech and big biz know, to
insiders. It's a market only getting started, and the app market is already worth $15 Trillion in
profits. That'll keep you from starving for a while if you win big there.
Tuesday, February 18th, 2014,
The app industry is turning the HTTP industry into a relic in a hurry. I mostly just want to keep
up with the speed of innovation and progress.
Wednesday, February 19th, 2014,
Cary Alberts. My Number 1 Enemy right now is my adoptive father.
When I attain power and become King, I will do everything in my power
to castrate and destroy that man.
I don't like how he abuses his power so much.
--------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------My collection of videos isn't just a collection of videos. It's a digital arsenal. Ammunition for a
giant fight. It's where my power really gets to show off.

P a g e | 941

-------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------February, 20th, 2014, 3:09 PM,

Unfortunately, my adult financial life so far seems to be fraught with financial problems.
Bankruptcy, health care, withholding of funds from employers and parental figures,
unemployment, people trying to steal my trade secrets, litigation (me suing and reporting
companies and people) and civil matters. I have to fight for my right to get fairly compensated.
I may be taking Bank of America to court over a false overdraft fee they subtracted from my
bank account. I don't trust those overdraft fees, so I'm exploring my civil options with a legal
resources company.
Friday, February 21st, 2014, 3:10 PM,
So I'm going to be suing a company or two in the near future, or at the very least having my case
for employment and/or payment reviewed by my attorneys.
This is no longer a creative action. It is officially a civil action. I tired of creativity a long time
ago. Creativity brings you nothing but trouble. Litigation gets you what you need in reality,
which is employment and money. Bottom line, I see you stealing from me and my ideas and
inventions, as a result, I will also be seeing you in court. Viacom lucked out in that I'm not
focusing on then. But I do have a Helen Kane-Betty Boop-like relationship with Viacom.
The only real soundproof room that muffles sound in my entire house is the garage. If you talk to
someone in the garage, no one in the house can hear it.
Hey, life sucks and all that. Enough to drive people to a life of crime half the time.
But hey, Unlimited Power isn't half bad.
Nudity and no money. The two elements practically go hand in hand. So THAT explains all the
broke porn girls out there....All they wanted was MONEY!!!! WAAAAAAHHHH!!!!!
--------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------Saturday, February 22nd, 2014, (5:40 AM),
Pay websites

Register.com
23andme.com
Instant Checkmate
Google Play store
Appy Pie

P a g e | 942

Ustream
Netflix
Rhapsody
Google Play Music

At this point, I care more about my budget than I do about my art or creative projects (comics,
books, TV, film). As far as the latter is concerned, now that I'm probably going to have money,
I'm all but retired. My creative projects will be ancient history. Doesn't make a difference to me.
I hold no delusions of the big or small publishers, Hollywood Studios, mainstream media
companies, Google, Viacom, or Time Warner EVER hiring me. I can take care of myself just
fine. Fuck em'.
--------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------Sunday, February 23rd, 2014, (7:34),
So, I'm finally getting the financial opportunity of going into business for myself.
I'm running an online broadcasting company and am also releasing an app through Google
Android to coincide with my original business model. So I'll have 3 business models going on:
Online video broadcasting, e-business, and inventing, developing, and distributing mobile apps,
to enhance the overall user experience. If my business does well, I could make money, but I
could also make not much. There's no way to predict or know how much money I'll make before
I'm actually up and running. It's hard to second guess the app market. But I could definitely get
paid very well. The business model is similar to Pandora and the Cartoon Network streaming
app. Either way, my brand will be in a more conspicuous position than it used to be. Not bad!
The mobile app market is very lucrative. Currently it makes about $15 trillion a year. I might see
a piece of that if I'm lucky.
--------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------Monday, February 24th, 2014, (12:15 PM),
The media doesn't like the fact that I'm one of the 10 most powerful 30 year olds on the planet.
They don't like "acknowledging" or admitting it. They think I'm "too powerful, too soon". The
media thinks only old people deserve power. Mark Zuckerberg is their "token young power
player". If the media does put me on a 2014 power list, it would be with an impersonator's face
and name who doesn't really exist in reality. I'm used to that.
I do not generally prefer to talk about my accomplishments with the people I know. I think
sustained humility speaks louder than any human accomplishment, including my own. I have

P a g e | 943

indeed accomplished much, but for some reason I'm not the type to brag or talk about it to the
friends in my life.
--------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------That's nice. My software app is going to be available at 4 major online mobile app retailers:
The 4 most popular ones.

Android Google Play App

iPhone App (iOS) (App Store)
Windows App
Blackberry App

And the best part is I get royalties for every copy of my app acquired at all 4 stores. How do I
make money from it when the app is free. Dunno.
The Future of Commerce: Digitizing The Economy (Working out the bugs)
Bitcoin, Kindle, Amazon, Netflix, Roku, Paypal, online banking, and Google Wallet are the
wave of the future. In the future, most commerce will be digital. Paper money is on the way out,
just like analog on the way out thanks to digital.
--------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------Tuesday, February 25th, 2015 (6:05 PM),
I'm glad I keep a daily journal log still. I forget a lot of stuff in my life. I'm glad I have a way to
preserve it. Similar to a blog, but it's a daily log, an offline log, not an online blog. I do this to
sharpen my blogging and tweeting skills.
It sure is a good thing I never have to actually work for any of my money anymore. I get paid
money not for working, but for being fortunate. A lot of people are jealous of me and my money.
My goal isn't anime, manga, comics, webcomics, novels, graphic novels, animation, co-pros, or
fine art. I tried and failed at them all. True. I have friends working in the fields who have
succeeded in those fields at the highest level.
But as I learned the reality of the situation. Just because they succeeded and I know them doesn't
mean I'm going to succeed like they did, or that I should request "favors" as some call them, or
have them help me in any way. Asking your famous friends for favors just because they're
successful and you're not? That's just being rude

P a g e | 944

I'm glad I'm learning to grow beyond my failures. Not everyone considers me a failure, even
though technically I've failed at many things. Oh well, that's life. Get over it and move on. Keep
moving forward.
My only real failure aside from failing financially was I put too much trust in the higher ups and
their "wisdom", which actually turned out to be plagiarism, short sightedness, cynicism,
mockery, and greed.
Wednesday, February 26th, 2014,
Ha Ha Ha! Yes! I am Very Handsome! My Face is Very Handsome! But anyway...
Newest Vocation?
Designing,
living.

inventing,

conceptualizing,

and

building

app

software

for

Apps are the future of software. I heard from one of my tech consultants
regular software is being replaced in popularity by downloadable apps, which
are also a form of software, albeit, a mobile one.
I have a bright future in tech and science, and computer internet IT science.
I'm officially skeptical of the validity of showbiz in terms of its relation
to my financial future, unless it's YouTube, Roku, DVR, Netflix, the Pirate
Bay, my online brand, or something.
By now, my video ripping, streaming, and recording is almost half as prolific
as my DIY literature is! It's catching up at a surprisingly high rate. I've
been writing longer than I've been streaming, but streaming is definitely on
its way too.

--------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------Thursday, February 27th, 2014, 6:06 PM,

I definitely don't play it safe. I'm a natural born gambler, strategist, rule breaker, and risk-taker.
I see life as one big gamble. A series of events that is at the mercy of the forces of the universe,
and mostly up to chance anyway. Life is a gamble. In life, people both win big and lose big. It
can go either way: Good or bad. Awesome, or Horrible. Life is a game of chance.
I'm a natural risk-taker. My entire life philosophy believes you won't get anywhere in life unless
you put stake in something, invest in something (whether it's an asset or skill) and take at least
some risk.
The risk-takers shall inherit the earth.

P a g e | 945

Being an entrepreneur means risk is part of your economic business and entrepreneurial strategy.
My star chart says I'm naturally very lucky, and I'm willing to factor that in. The luckier you are,
the more risk you can afford to take overall.
--------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------Literary Approach
Strategy revision time!
Revising my writing strategy. Time to review what's working about my literature, writing,
storytelling, scenes, and narration, and what isn't. And then I review the analysis of what works
and what doesn't and make adjustments to my plan.
Here's what I've learned:
My scripts and fiction stories are different, they are different beasts.
Status:
Script: Finished, Completed, and Successfully Structured and Written
Fiction / Short Stories / Novel: Not finished, lacking structure, and incomplete.
Analysis: Why did the novel and fiction fail, but the script succeed.
Theory and Answer: The answer lies in planning. I didn't just dive into my script. I thought and
wrote and graphed and mapped its structure out. If I apply the same meticulous planning to my
narrative literature, the structural planning will build on itself and leave the structure of a literary
foundation. Fiction writing without outlining and planning, and prompts, is like architecture with
no blueprints. It probably won't feel structurally sound in the way a planned foundation can.
--------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------Saturday, March 1st, 2014, (12:18 AM),
Work I got done on Friday:

McFarlane Fabric Study and Visual Analysis.

Writing Outline for "There Goes the Neighborhood"
Converting PDF Manuscripts into Adjustable Daily Log Word Files.
Organizing daily log.
Uploading videos to Ustream Channel Archive
Google App Toggling

Lots of training and practice, lots of cataloging.

P a g e | 946

Being a software developer is a Dream Job. There's only about 1 million people in the United
States who work professionally as software developers.

Monday, March 3rd, 2014, (11:43 PM),

play.google.com
play.google.com/app/publish
ActionToon Mobile: Live Anime, on Google Play
ActionToonTV
O-Desk
@ActionToonTV
ActionToonTV @ YouTube
ActionToonTV @ Google+
Appypie.com

This is getting pretty cool. I'm running an online and offline franchise of next generation
digitally and DIY based entertainment and media, and I became a software, or "app" developer.
I'm probably going to be hiring some freelance tech developers and programmers to help handle
source code programming duties for my app project. My budget? Between $20 and $100.
Depending on when my next payment comes in.
I posted a job listing, and within the first hour or so I'm already getting some messages in my
inbox from people interested in getting to work. I've got a guy in mind, but I need to correspond
and interview him, make sure he's the right choice. I'll probably get back to his offer sometime
tomorrow afternoon. o-Desk is great for finding programmer and developer employees. They're
like On Call Programmers, but less expensive.
--------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------Tuesday, March 4th, 2012, (6:29 PM)
So far the top candidate for my job opening for my Admob account definitely seems qualified.
One of his specialties is Google Android. Plus, he was the first one to send me a direct message.
To top that off, his hourly rate is $4.40 an hour! I can actually afford that if his work schedule
doesn't occupy too much time. Or I suppose I could just see if he wants to name his payment
price after we discuss his credentials and role in my project.
His name is Dave, and he lives and works in Kenya.
Apparently, I outsource some of my work to contractors internationally.

P a g e | 947

I pride myself on having a diverse workplace worldwide. I don't believe in discrimination against
non-whites, or any form of nationalism against international employees worldwide, of any creed,
lifestyle, look, gender, sexuality preference, or race. As long as you know how to program code,
you're good.
I have this open minded attitude from observing the diversity of one of / some of my favorite
companies: Time Warner, Cartoon Network, Adult Swim, Titmouse, and Williams Street.
They're some of the least racist and least biased companies I know. America means work
opportunities for all. And if people have the skills, I will pony up the money to hire them to build
my dreams.
I can't help but wonder if there are more decent programmers living and working online in and
from Kenya like Dave. He could do wonders for them if our working relationship works. I see no
reason not to hire him. His rates are low and he seems well educated enough. He's the first
African programmer working in tech I've actually heard of. Everyone else is white, Asian, or
Indian. But if we have a president with roots in Africa (Obama), I don't see why we can't have
Africans and African-Americans working in American IT, mobile tech and portable OS, and new
media. There's nothing wrong with international diversity in the tech industry. This
discrimination thing makes no sense. It doesn't make sense to me. With the right opportunity, an
African can run an operating system and program source code just as good as a white American
male like myself or any other white person can. Can we program computers? Yes we can!
I know my non-discriminatory non-nationalistic business hiring policy is innovative and
progressive and Democratic in some regards, but I'm not implementing it for respect or fame. I
just feel it is the right, just thing to do. The internet has made it possible to hire a Kenyan
programmer all the way over in Kenya, and I am grateful for that. As long as the result is
successful, that is all that matters.
When my parents Cary and Peggy found out I was hiring a Kenyan in Africa, they gave me a
literal "WTF?" reaction.
"How do you know he won't just take the money and run." they complained.
"It's because everyone on the site has to agree to the terms of service," I said.
My parents are very against outsourcing employees, especially my adoptive father Cary.
But I say, that is nonsense. I'm hiring him. If he's interested.
ITT Technical Institute and Authorhouse Publishing have been pretty persistent in trying to reach
me and get a hold of me. But currently my mind is elsewhere. My mind isn't with books or
education, two of my passions of the past coming back to haunt me through email and phone like
a phantom. I'm a CEO of my own startup now, and I feel I need to focus on the broadcasting
industry. MY broadcasting industry. My OWN industry that I created for many.

P a g e | 948

I have my priorities. My priorities lie with my job, my project and employee. I'm not really
interested in pursuing Authorhouse or ITT. Authorhouse's reputation is controversial, and ITT in
some way is hard to get into. I'm going with what I'm comfortable doing, which is my job I
already have.
The waiting time to hear back from online associates, peers, and colleagues who have a
correspondence with me can excruciating. But if you get a response, it's a very thrilling time to
be alive. It's lonely suffering through "digital correspondence lag-time" in Central Florida.
Pacing around my housing waiting to hear back from people regarding some of my most
important decisions can be nerve wracking. Nothing to do but pace around the house, watch
History 2 Channel, and wait for a response, if I actually get one.
My journal books are dense, convoluted, and complex, much like my mental thought process. It's
a technical manual on how to be a famous eccentric and a teller of great stories and narratives.
On the uncertain side, dialogue with workers is a little stop and go, but fortunately things will
probably work themselves out.
On the plus side, the number of downloads of ActionToon Mobile now sits at 5 in total. 3 more
than 2 days ago.
--------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------Wednesday, March 5th, 2014, (6:15 PM)
In actual good news, it turns out I don't need an IT assistant after all, so I let him go with a
courteous email.
It turns out I got AdMob to work all by myself, entirely on my own. After much digging into
"SDK" and "Android Studio" programming code and lingo, as it turns out, the only code you
need to cash in on your phone is a publisher ID. Turns out the website was just taking a long
time to process my registration because a lot of people who manufacture apps (like myself and
others) want to sign up for AdMob, as it turns out it actually pays quite well and delivers solid
numbers. Turns out I don't need real programming skills, or even much knowledge of HTML:
Just patience and the ability to play the online waiting game with Google.
--------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------Thursday, March 6th, 2014, (1:33 AM),
Broadcasting nowadays is just as much an art form as it is a technology, media, or business.
Especially online. A lot of traditional TV people don't broadcast with any real actual flare. I've
got broadcasting flare and finesse in spades! I've taken all the creativity, focus, and discipline I
learned from drumming, writing, and drawing, and am applying it to broadcasting as a
technological filmmaking artform.

P a g e | 949

(2:08 PM)
Hey alright! My download figures doubled overnight!
Now my Google Play App has received 48 downloads! With half of them happening in less than
12 hours. I really lucked out this time.
My app....is AWESOME!!!!! It didn't get a very good first review (1 star), but still, I think the
download figures speak for themselves.
Happy birthday, Google Play! You turn 2 today! In a mere 2 years, Google Play has gotten....
Google Play App Store...Over 50 billion downloads! In 2 years. I knew the site was growing. I
didn't know it was THAT much.

P a g e | 950

P a g e | 951

Saturday, March 8th, 2014, (2:08 AM),

Update:
My app is on its way to success. I've already gotten 2 five-star reviews from anonymous people.
And soon I'll be getting paid for my app. It is a happy time for me. A successful time.
I also asked Thomas Romain if he could mentor me online in his spare time and take me on as an
online corresponding protg. I feel he would have a lot to teach me just by us writing to each
other, and it would be an online mentorship, internship, whatever one would call it. He's a cool
guy, a successful, hardworking and talented guy. Maybe some of his cool will rub off on me, by
osmosis! I guess we will just have to see about that.
I consider Thomas Romain and Yoshitoshi Abe to be my mentors in some ways already.
My parents have finally accepted the reality of the idea that you can have friends who are online
friends who you've never met in person formally, yet the friendship is still very real. They finally
accept my online friends as real friends.
ActionToonTV, until I can upload more videos from my collection to mix it up, is going to be
slow goings at first. Updates will not necessary come quickly, except every so often. I think a
few different video series a week (say, 2 to 3 on average) feels about right, like the right tempo.
I don't know if my app will make me rich and wealthy, but it could definitely make me a profit if
it's in its element, what with Google Admob revenue. In the meantime I'll keep putting monthly
and weekly funding into my marketing, PR, and advertising budget.
It ain't easy running a company. But I seem to manage just fine. I've gained confidence. Now I
have confidence in my business ideas, so I'm getting better at the execution and exhibiting stage
of business.
(2:10 PM),
Now it's in the middle of the day. On a Saturday.
Nice day out.
(7:24 PM),
Apps are an amazing thing. The profit potential for businesses and especially tech oriented
individuals is huge! Google Play got 50 billion downloads in only 2 years, which is incredible.
I'm glad I'm a part of that now. Even I got as many as 60+ downloads in the first week on a $10
Admob advertising budget. And if I begin earning money once my advertising is up (if it
succeeds), I'm sure I'll reinvest as much of those profits into marketing and PR as I can. It's

P a g e | 952

actually very effective that way. If I make a small profit, it will go toward the further production
of the business that made it possible for me to make a small or large profit and revenue.
When I was younger, because everyone used to look down on me (and in some cases still do), I
always had this massive power-lust. I was power mad. I could never have enough power, I felt.
When you're a Eurasian-American Scorpio, Master Builder, or NT, you tend to feel that way
early on. Power meaning money and freedom. But now that my career is on an upward trend, and
I actually am on the cusp of having enough, if not an excess of power, success, popularity,
celebrity, cultural status, and money, I'm feeling the opposite way in some ways. Like you can
actually have Too Much Power Too Young. What happens if you screw up, or make huge
mistakes when you're powerful, like the kind I made, when I was making mistakes and wasn't
super-powerful. Women look at you differently when you are in charge, when you're in a
position of authority and power like I've ended up in. I feel like there's a possibility I could have
too much wealth and power, like I'm too prosperous and too in control. I'm used to my life being
the opposite of that: Hated, chaotic, unstable, and out of control. Starting your own niche TV
network website is no small deal. The Ultimate Goal of something like that is very large in
scope, and I don't know if I'm completely ready for that job. Not that I have a choice. I made this
bed, now I guess I have to lie in it, for better or worse. Star ratings are equal parts positive and
negative. And the longer I stay off air, the more restless my audience gets. It's my job to sate the
teething masses. Not to sound self-aggrandizing or anything. Scorpios and NTs are good at selfaggrandizement. That's the American dream to us. That and new, innovative technical systems.
Great. I fear my own power. I fear the limitless and revolutionary possibilities, the game
changing force of my own power. I saw it face to face, and it made me feel...uneasy.
Power Anxiety. Anxiety around power.
I approached Thomas Romain through email. I decided to go off script, so I asked him if he
could teach or mentor me. He might be pretty busy working on stuff like Shoji Kawamori's
Nobunaga: The Fool and Shinichiro Watanabe-san's Space Dandy. I'd love to get advice on how
to draw from someone that talented, a high level anime production designer.
So I've got a couple things I'm going to have to sit tight and wait for:

Thomas's response, opinion, and input, ranked in my book as first and foremost
SS TV
Toonami to conclude, so I can resume broadcasting
Admob and all the rest to approve my campaigns
Gathering enough spirit energy to resume screenwriting and art training

P a g e | 953

Monday, March 10th, 2014, (8:39 AM),

Themes of many of my screenplays:
Guns and firearms, The Supernatural, Action, Martial Arts and Fighting, Military, Technology,
Politics and Government, Surveillance, The Feds, Heroes and Villains.
My app is doing pretty well for itself! I'm excited about this.
I've decided that even though I mastered screenwriting on the first draft attempt, I want to master
it further, and become Lord of the Screenplay. I wish I was a Screenwriting God.
(1:17 PM),
It is hard to channel my artwork and comics page compositions of Great Beauty and Complexity
into books when my Chi and Spirit Energy is so out of alignment. Mental illness, bullying,
bigots, war, anger, hatred, injustice, violence, bad weather, and criminal activity are nothing
more than spiritual imbalance in disguise.
From now on I'm drawing all my comic book pages in pre-bound hardcover sketchbook, as soon
as I can afford to buy a few copies...as a way to chronicle my comics-making journey. As a preconstructed book that fills up itself, just like my journals. The way it was always meant to be.
(5:42 PM),
Got some new glasses at the optometrist today. The frames are new, silver, and different. The
frames of my glasses were manufactured in China, according to the printing on them. Nice.
Made from Chinese metal.
(9:34 PM)

Continued on Next Page

P a g e | 954

Good-Bad
Creative Quality Observation Ratio
Art
30% Good
70% Bad
Fiction Writing
100% Good
Screenwriting
100% Good
Technology and Broadcasting
100% Good
-------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------Tuesday, March 11th, 2014, (5:14 PM),
Well, ActionToonTV is up and running. It's 30% - 60% closer to becoming a reality, at least in
terms of being a 24/7 network like all the animation networks on TV. Whereas the networks play
reruns late at night when they're asleep, I play "network library" loops of shows that I already
premiered in the past, mostly during late weeknight hours and early weekday mornings. I've still
got to wait around 2 to 4 days from now to activate my Google Admob account, but I sense once
I get the money bank activation code, it won't end up being too much of a pain. My marketing
budget ran out, so now all I can really do is watch my channel for fun, keep uploading, and wait
a week or two longer until Google makes a small deposit in my account for activation of my
account.
So in other words, overall, things are going pretty well for me.
Hey hey! A Google Play commercial! Just saw one on Adult Swim. My app got 86+ downloads
there! Oh happy day!
-----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

P a g e | 955

Wednesday, March 12th, 2014 (1:17 PM),

Currently streaming-watching: Heat Guy J, on ActionToonTV. Good show! Jolly good show!
It's the perfect distraction from everyday stress. I like this broadcast-tech-filmmaking product I
have created.
My new-er, new-est dream(s) are/is considerably easier to attain than my older dreams, that may
be weakening in tenacity and strength.
Some of my current dreams include:

Master Screenwriting
Become A Master Screenwriter
Launch and Maintain My Own TV Network
Create And Build My Own Successful Application Software
See a 24/7 Animation Channel with an Emphasis on Action and Fantasy Become a
Reality
Succeed at Something I Haven't Normally Succeeded At Previously (App Development)

Fortunately, I've achieved 96% of all these goals individually and Primarily. For the most part, I
succeeded at doing what I set out to do this time. Not like STUPID animation where you have to
get a million and 1 okays just to start work on a stupid project that won't earn you anyone's actual
respect because they consider you old fashioned and technophobic,
...like Sumner the anti-Google L.A. Weirdo or whoever the hell else. But nobody cares about
those people anyway.
But anyway, in other news, newer goals are significantly easier to achieve than childhood and
adolescent goals, which were far too ambitious to accomplish on my level of resources. It's not
lack of resourcefulness that kept me from achieving childhood dreams. It was the lack of
resources.
How to Have More Fulfilling Relationship: I never used to be into living through other people,
their respect, credibility, popularity, wealth, power, and achievements until I grew up. When you
become an adult in the working world, you have a true honest to God knowledge of how difficult
it is to achieve things. It's hard! It's hard work! Drawing and writing are two of the Hardest forms
of day labor, unbeknownst to most everyday people. But anyone who's tried to write or draw
knows how hard drawing or writing stories really is. I don't believe in Envy or Jealousy. I believe
in letting people I know who have achieved more than me live my life for me on some level,
UNTIL I figure out how to manage getting there on the throne myself. Living vicariously
through others is something a lot of people, fans of celebrities and public figures do. "You're
living my dreams. Don't you be a slob." I always wanted to create and executive produce my
own animated TV drama and action show, so naturally somehow I ended up becoming friends

P a g e | 956

online who achieved and/or mastered just that. They've done all the things I wanted to, all the
things I secretly wished I could do. They may know it and they may not, but they are already
living a dream. MY DREAM. And I love them for it.
The people I love, respect, and admire the most on a personal and professional level use their
power and resources in a fashion similar to how I would envision myself using it: Responsibly,
Regally, and not in a Punitive manner. The people who do the opposite of that: Abuse, Misuse,
or show a lack of appreciation for their own power, often make me literally sick to my stomach,
and invoke the greater part of my wrath and scorn. I see it as nothing less than an unjust
impunity. The former part is incredibly honorable to me. The latter party is disdainful and
dishonorable. The latter party is not responsible.
"With Great Power, Comes Great Responsibility"
-Stan Lee
Spider-Man
Google wallets having technical issues with receiving payment and getting people's money for
them. BETTER not be a hacker virus problem. Better just be a bug. I thought their security
system was better than that.
---------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------Saturday, March 15th, 2014 (3:00 AM),
There's a reason most of my novels haven't made it past the first paragraph-chapter yet.
Simple: It's because I didn't think to outline any of my books. From now on I'm going to outline
everything I write: Lyrics, poetry, essays, scripts, fiction, short stories, novels, screenplays,
comic books. EVERYTHING. If it's going to have a story, it must have an outline. I'm not giving
myself a choice here.
(11:52 AM),
My Android app has now gotten 102 downloads. So far I've gotten 100+ downloads in less than
7 days, or 1 week.
If I keep getting 100 views/week, I'm on course to potentially earn 400 downloads in 4 weeks, or
1 month. I'm on course to (in the best case scenario) receive 4,800+ - 5,000+ downloads/year.
But with Adwords, I could get double or triple that (10,000 - 15,000 downloads/year). Paying a
lot for marketing can result in a lot of business.
I'm not a "cheat" so much as I am "naturally lucky". I don't HAVE any resources to manipulate
the system or chance to cheat, OTHER than a lot of good luck.

P a g e | 957

I believe in Good Luck. I don't believe in Bad Luck and Curses. No such thing. Just like God.
Neither one exists. I have my doubts, to say the least.
The only people I've ever met who MIGHT BE unlucky...
would be John D. and Brian Johnston. Brian Johnston is DEFINITELY cursed. No one else is
though. D isn't evil like Brian, but he is unlucky.
I wouldn't be surprised to see Florida entirely underwater in 50 - 100 years. Polar Ice caps and all
that. Florida will be one of the first states to go...People who stay will probably die. Eventually.
I'm glad I don't date Asian girls. They're UGLY. Japanese girls/women are ugly as all HELL.
Glad I'm not stuck with one. I've never BEEN attracted to girls who look Asian. Gross. I'm part
Asian myself, but I'm definitely not into Asian women, or even young Asian women.
Business Test:
Why did Google-Tube Succeed and make billions? It gives people exactly what they want
mostly. It makes things easy to find. They give constant status updates. Freedom of content. No
copyright restrictions. Transparent data. No dicking around. Innovation as a Policy. Equal
treatment of everyone. Free. Accessibility. More accessible, sensible, less sneaky, closed in, and
underhanded than competitors (Viacom, Disney).
On Google Play, lots of downloads often = a certain amount of 1-star ratings. I doubt anyone will
want to write my app a review.
I guess I'm gonna have to suck it up and cope. Just deal with it until I get more series from my
private collection up and running. Uploading time is painfully slow.
--------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------Sunday, March 16th, 2014 (4:02 PM)
That's fascinating. As I've just learned about Scorpio traits, I learned something new about the
Scorpio Sting. It can be used on things and circumstances. Not just people. The Scorpio Sting
can destroy, demolish, whither, or decay anyone and anything, good or bad. It's the Raw Power
of the Scorpio.
As it turns out, the world of mature adult animation on TV really isn't very crowded in America.
Everyone seems to want to do either webcomics or anime. They want to take shortcuts.
In the united states, adult animation, other than being synonymous with pornographic sexuality,
is synonymous with independent animation.

P a g e | 958

Monday, March 17th, 2014, (9:42 PM),

I found my girlfriend (x-girlfriend? I can't even tell anymore) Nicole's people finder profile
online. Should I disrupt time and space to reach out to her and maybe change my life, or should I
remain hidden from her perception, like a ghost, haunting her? Well, it's a little late for that
second option. I already sent a contact request to her. I miss her a lot, but I don't know if she
misses me. I did make her almost as famous as I am though. And she certainly seemed to leave
the impression she ended up taking it that way. But talking to her directly would always be
preferable to a premature memorial. It's been 12 long years since I've spoken to Nicole since the
Divine Art School Mishap. When I got expelled and had to drop out. I'll never forget Nicole, and
as long as I know she's still well, alive, and out there somewhere, I'll never give up my Epic
Quest to Find Nicole.
It's never easy being the Executive, The Boss, The It-Guy. The Power Player.
For now, I'm hiding out. Hiding from the media. Hiding from it all. As a recluse. I'm not as eager
to post comments and press releases publicly as I used to. Part of me just wishes I could talk to
Chris, Nicole, Amanda, and Alona and hang out with them at my house, or their house all day. I
feel closer to their level somehow. I guess my new online TV business sort of evoked that
feeling. Like my tech and broadcast business is helping me to establish my own independence in
a way I never could before. Sure, it's a variable income, but that just means there's more
opportunity to make more money.
I'll admit, my drawing and art proportions kind of suck 50% of the time. Most
of the time 60%-70% of my drawing proportion is on, or "correct". Meanwhile
the other 30%-40% is wonky and off. My art proportions SUCK! The arm is too
short, or the body and head are too short, or I don't use gridded paper, or I
don't actually measure and follow and draw within the GUIDELINES on the grid.
It sucks! Needs work.

Tuesday, March 18th, 2014, (12:53 PM),

My Little Pony: Friendship is Magic, and nearly everything that's Pokemon or airing on the hub,
is a corporate ploy. It's not a human creation. It isn't even owned by a human being. It's a
corporate creation: Owned by corporations. And the shows on CN that ARE made by human
beings: Their current reator concepts, aren't really very good at all. They kind of BLOW. Regular
Show, Adventure Time, Uncle Grandpa, Steven Universe. All mediocre at best. None of these
show's have anywhere near as much style as my conceptual design has.
I still believe in mature animation and Japanese influence in art, even though it has long since
died off in the public media spotlight.

P a g e | 959
Art: Manifested
The Quest and Search for Inspiration:
It's not easy to find inspiration, energy, and enthusiasm when you're older.
Not inside yourself anyway. You must turn to people, places and things
outside yourself and your current surroundings for inspiration: The right
drawing, the right music, the right software and art supplies. The right TV
shows and movies, the right online videos, the right DVD, and the right
location. Inspiration will not seek you. You must seek inspiration. You must
find those hidden treasures, in your room, on your desk, in your libraries
and collections, that makes you WANT to draw. The things and people that
build up that creative desire. The bohemian desire for self expression. Every
time you look at a piece of paper and can't think of something to put down,
you must mark the occasion. Writer's block where the blocked creativity on
the page happened. Maybe you're not looking at a potent enough spot on the
page, to draw channeling energy from. Maybe there's no spiritual creative
visionary pathway there, so you look elsewhere. Keep that up and going. And
don't leave your best drawings out. If you want to keep drawing, you must use
reverse psychology and TRICK yourself into drawing by convincing yourself
you're drawing "terribly" by leaving really crappy artwork out. That way
topping yourself won't feel as challenging, even when it is! If you only see
blank pages around your studio, and not completed masterworks, the lack of
good material within viewing distance will fuel your desire to create some
that "isn't there yet", even though technically it is, but it's hidden away
or on a facedown page.
My technique is improving. Layering, full page compositions (fully layered
page details) is getting easier. The answer is simple. When I draw, I keep
drawing until my hand hurts. No quitting on the drawing or session. It's a
spiritual exercise. I know drawing draws from the bank of my soul, as yes I
am channeling my art spiritually with visionary energy, but that's why I need
to keep persevering in my studies. Do I really have that much soul to give? I
only use a small amount of my true mojo and soul and spiritual energy and
power in my drawing because a little goes a long way.
But back to my point. I'm filling up entire pages with composition that
covers the entire gridded page, without even thinking about it. I'm not
leaving as much white space on each page. I'm progressing in a draftsmanship
fashion similar to Hiroaki Samura. Now his art looks amazing, but even he
admits his art looked simple at the very beginning of his career, and that he
left a "lot of white space", and was embarrassed by it. Not that that matters
now. It doesn't really affect or influence how people view his art now. Now,
when people think Samura, they think realism and violent, well choreographed
and filmed-&-edited Edo-Samurai action on the page.
The Gridded Page works wonders for proportion and detail and cities and
architecture. Gridded paper can add structure to a full page composition that
might otherwise not be there. Best part is, Gridding Increases detail power
and soul. And the blue lines organizing its composition are invisible to

P a g e | 960
scanners. It never picks the grid-lines up. From now on, I'm doing EVERY
sketch on bluegrid proportion paper.

I'm marking off the days, as my dream becomes closer to becoming a reality. My content
collection grows, as does my wallet. But I'm sweating each day as it counts down to the end of
the approximate 2 business days when I can activate AdMob and make some money. Finally.
Then I can finally pay my advertising and PR bills, and splurge on all the stuff I've always
wanted to buy, from food to drinks to DVDs and video downloads from Amazon and
FUNimation, and travel and the leisure and take-it-easy lifestyle in general. The world is my
oyster.
--------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------Wednesday, March 19th, 2014, (12:10 PM),
Is Google trying to undercut and interfere with my financial affairs and profitability?? It would
appear so. First they cut me off from my most popular YouTube channels and don't pay me for
creating YouTube in part, and now their latest strategy is to avoid depositing bank payments,
illegally, that they owe me so I am restrained from making profits from my work.
I've had just about all I can stand with this Google fraud bullshit. Stealing my inventions?
Banning my videos because of their copyright tyranny AFTER Stealing my inventions?
Outsourcing all their technical support to India? Refusing to activate my sponsorship businesses?
I've HAD IT WITH THESE PEOPLE. Until they get their act together, if that ever happens. I'm
sick of them, undercutting my every effort. Fuck em'. I deserve to succeed too. I'm sick of
Google cheating me out of money and business plans I've rightfully earned, then taking credit for
my contributions to humanity, only to end up acting like every other bad media conglomerate
that pretends I don't exist. FUCK ALL THAT. I'm done.
Seriously. My neighbor / former friend DIED yesterday, my account on Google Play's security
was compromised, for financial reasons on Monday by some third world third rate asia-based
country spy-hacker, Google's technical support kind of fucked me over today with horrible nonAmerican India outsourcing, AND I'm not getting paid anytime soon. Google even tried to shut
my first website (ActionToonTV) down through Google Sites.
Worst week in the history of my life.
Because of this, I am refusing to show up at any funeral, ANYWHERE, for ANYONE I KNOW,
for the next 5 to 10 years. Better not die anytime in the next 10 years, friends.
I ain't much of an artist. And I ain't much of a traditional writer.
I'm a Thought Artist. I'm an artist who's Mastered the Creative and Imaginative Thought Process.
I don't WORK with art and literature. I work with Ideas. Ideas which I marry to paper and a
computer screen. The page and screen liberate my thoughts, theories, ideas, concepts, and visions

P a g e | 961

from my brain. From my mind. I have a lot of thoughts, and I'm very devoted to putting them
down somewhere, so they don't have to float around the Spiritual Energy in the air orbiting
around my brain, like the Earth and Moon orbit and gravitate around the sun. I make my
thoughts real.
I'm unaware of whether being a traditional Idea Man, a Thought Artist like Tim Burton or
something like that is a Bankable Skill. Just not sure.
--------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------Friday, March 21st, 2014, (3:18 PM),
I believe in ghosts, spirits, spiritual energy, souls, and the spirit world. Not a Christian God
though.
The truth about art is, a lot of the best art of all time is enchanted (or) haunted. Making a good
piece of art is a form of alchemy, which is magic science. Building, summoning, and channeling
the magic of the artist's soul. The Ghosts of Art. Enki Bilal did a whole book about that. Some
people say the Louvre is haunted. So Enki Bilal responded to that by applying imagination, and
making an experimental "haunted" art book about it, where he portrayed some of the wandering
souls at the Louvre in his artwork and photography. Amazing. Great book. Can't wait until I have
enough money to buy a copy for myself from Amazon France. I've done some of my best
illustrations, designs, and concept art in haunted places (My house, Sunrise Hall). Haunted
Creativity is Superior Creativity.
I've already established a working online business model. As long as you use a PPC
monetization system, based on clicks to your page's content, it's a VERY effective business
model. It's an easy road to wealth online, assuming you're bosses are paying you a fair
percentage, and your being compensated for all clicks on a PPC basis. All websites are in
desperate need of a profit splitting form of PPC page monetization. That way the larger your
audience is, the larger your paycheck is. Simple enough. Yet the internet mostly fails to grasp
this concept. My business model is ahead of its time. It's innovative and direct, unlike the old
web before the web 2.0.
Well, I'm not "doomed" anymore, thanks to credit card debt and technology and smart phones.
Well, that and Casselberry's "no person be left on the street, let them eat in soup kitchens" policy.

P a g e | 962

Sunday, March 23rd, 2014, (12:45 PM),

Technology That Revolutionized My Life

Google
YouTube
Android
DirecTV
Netflix
Roku
Google Play
Amazon Kindle
ActionToonTV

P a g e | 963

P a g e | 964

Sunday, April 6th, 2014, 1:51 PM,

The producer I'm talking to is currently negotiating with producers on an animated feature film
with a budget of around $4.5 million. He's interested in a possible co-production.
I did all that work before I negotiated with a studio beforehand, for a very good reason.
The reason: I'm terrible at drawing art under pressure, in person, on demand, or beforehand. It's
not that I'm lazy or think I'm too good to be involved. That's the thing. It's the opposite. I knew
I'd be fatigued and blocked by anxiety and worry about doing a good job on an animation project
when the time came, so I did most of the design and story development a priori, on spec, and
beforehand. That way the studio would have material to work with, and I wouldn't have to
provide all the labor on the spot. I'm an a priori kind of guy.
Working on spec takes guts, and energy, and focus, and a lot of hard work and labor crafting
your vision with your own bare hands on paper in ink and pencil, and typing up lots of story
nuggets, and scripts, until you've got a presentation you're happy with that your studio clients can
get as excited about making and funding as you are. It can and often does take your entire life
savings to convince you're backers to give you a chance.
Working on bringing your vision to life with color, sound, and motion on screen with animation
takes patience, even more courage, and a lot of successful communication with your associates.
It also takes a lot of collaboration. But effective communication is definitely key.
It takes all of these things, and hundreds, if not thousands more to make an actual co production
happen.
Doing a co production changes everything. Everything. Getting the whole thing started takes one
killer presentation. Jhonen. He got to do Zim, because his comic book work (SQUEE!, I Feel
Sick, JtHM) was amazing, and helped establish the beginning of his career. The vision was there,
and strong enough to lay the groundwork for Invader Zim's large scale production Jhonen
oversaw. I always found that inspiring.
In terms of having pre and post production done overseas as a co production. I can really only be
hands on with my own show in the future if it won't be disruptive to the staff's work on the
production. I don't want to come across as demanding or overbearing, or egomaniacal, or bossy,
or punitive. I'm willing to do what it takes to make the production happen.
I'm not going to memorize my producers and co production manual.
I don't need to memorize my producer's and co production manual.
I simply need to keep it next to me at all times, just like the video game SNES Nintendo Power
interior magazine strategy guides I used to reference while playing video games when I was a
child.

P a g e | 965

Fame. Power. Pioneer Status. Fortune. I have them all. Animation gives you all those things. But
those aren't as important as the vision, and bringing that vision to a successful realization and
manifestation. I'm Building my own school of animation. When all this is "done" with (if it ever
is official done), I'll be the Expert, Genius, and Master. I'm already starting to technically.
The public is already aware of me and my project. So it's my job to keep reinventing it, reselling
it, and refreshing its image and style. To keep things fresh and stop them from going stale or
static. I'm planning on doing as much new artwork as is humanly possible for this project. I also
want the credits to scroll like Japanese credits, with an OP, opening rock or instrumental song.
My name will be primarily at the end of each episode, NOT the beginning, and might be a nom
de plum, depending on how my contract is set up. You can only do so much talking without
actually drawing and working.
My drawings are not always so hot on a technical level. Some are incredibly simple, but that's
okay. You don't have to draw perfectly every time just because you have your own show. If
anything, having your own show, like a Simpsons or a Samurai Jack, makes you more tolerant of
your sloppy, bad drawings. With co productions, you realize there are artists who have quantity,
and artists who have quality. I fall into the former category, with only a small helping of quality.
You realize you don't have to draw perfectly just to be a creator of a project. That's not the point.
Some young people assume you have to be perfect just to be in charge. That's definitely a
delusional lie perpetuated by people who have no real professional experience.
Some young inexperienced artists only see the big picture in black-and-white. They assume
shows with good artwork are only made by good artists, and shows with bad artwork can
henceforth only be drawn by horrible artists, and the two must always be separate, right? The
truth is, good artists do bad drawings. Bad artists do good drawings. It's ignorant to say
otherwise.
So. Where is my international experience? Co productions are more complex and challenging
than normal productions.
Co production = experimental, pioneering, and innovative production process, method, systems,
and technique. The truth is, there isn't a blatant right or wrong way to make a co production. It's
not something you can learn. It must be experienced.
My client's studio is in talks with a local group overseas in their local region about 4.5 million
dollar movie deal. I'm pretty excited to hear that. So he's not short of money, which is always a
positive. My meeting with him is sometime next week.
------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

P a g e | 966

Monday, April 7th, 2014, 8:50 PM,

With social media photo sharing sites that display comics and artwork and other design work and
illustrations/sketches, are big publishers really even relevant or necessary anymore? There are at
least 8 image-sharing sites where artists can post and promote their own artwork. I'm still trying
to play catch up with all of it. I used to think sites like Instagram, Flickr, and Tumblr were only
for mainstream and popular artists, but in reality, anyone can use them. Not just artists with
millions of fans like Jhonen Vasquez and Bryan Lee O'Malley.
My new internet nom de plum is. JM Matthews, or James Michael Matthews.
Sites I'd like to get an account on:

Pixiv
Flickr
Instagram [x]
Tumblr
Picasa
Scribd [?]
Pinterest [x]
Sites I already have an account on:

Twitter
YouTube
Ustream
Pixiv
Photobucket
WCN
Blogger
Comixology
Graphicly

I have a good reason not to go with non-self-publisher companies. And a good reason not to go
with American publishers or animation companies:
A: I'm comfortable in the mainstream. I'm not comfortable in mainstream animation or
publishing. It's too social for my tastes.
B: I'm not comfortable there, especially with the artists. They mock me and make fun of me.
Look down on me and say my art sucks. They're kind of a bunch of assholes half the time.
They're jerks, and I'm not comfortable with artist jerks. I do better in solitude, when it's just me
off in the corner doing my own thing by myself.

P a g e | 967
My universe is a multiverse. I dabble in various media, with various
franchises and stories. I'm a trans-media storyteller, designer, and
creator.

That's why I write novels as a novelist, launch co production series as an animator, create comics
as a cartoonist, and write screenplays as a filmmaker.
I hate having to sweat it out and wait out the storm.
My anxiety isn't getting the better of me, but it's trying to.

IF the producer doesn't call or email me, I can't seal the deal
AND IF I can't seal a deal I won't get to do a project
AND IF I don't get to do a project, I don't make money
AND IF I don't make money I'm stuck living with my ruthless father for the rest of my
life. until he dies of stress.

That's how my anxiety works. I'm afraid of failing.

Tuesday, April 8th, 2014,
Had an acid trip-style dream this morning. My dreams are a lot like drug hallucinations, and so
are my nightmares. For instance, I had a nightmare around 2 pm. that Radiohead was actually in
a BAD music video (that never happens in reality), and Thom York's face started throbbing, and
pulsating, like a piece of cooking meat on a frying pan, or an omelet, and melted off of his
shoulders collapsing into a puddle of ooze. My newfound fear of contorted and deformed faces is
quite justified, as there are quite a few online targeted at me, attempting to contort my face. Scary
shit man. Shit face is more like it.
Cultures Evolve Differently. The Arts and Artistic Cultures Develop Differently and
independently of one another in different regions of the world. Animation contains some of those
most pronounced differences and evolutionary developments.
Animation Evolved Differently in North America than it did in Eurasia.
Between the year 1940 and 2014, a Great Exchange took place.
Animation Art in the United States went from being some of the BEST Animation in the world
to being some of the most corporate, slowest, and worst. Collectively speaking.
Animation Art in Eurasia went from looking simple and derivative, to innovative, designy, and
the most complex-looking and progressive animation in the world.

P a g e | 968

Asian-American (and Euro) International Art Cliques

Osamu Tezuka
Katsuhiro Otomo
Moebius
Todd McFarlane
JM Matthews
Frank Miller
Dave Sim

Hayao Miyazaki
John Lasseter
Moebius

Jamie Hewlett
Jhonen Vasquez
Rob Schrab
Evan Dorkin
Valve
Jim Mahfood
FSc
Gainax
Fred Gallagher

P a g e | 969

Shoji Kawamori
Shinichiro Watanabe
Thomas Romain
Yoshitoshi Abe
JM Matthews
Yasuhiro Nightow
Hiroaki Samura
Steve Blum
Sean Akins
Jason DeMarco
LeSean Thomas
Titmouse
Felipe Smith

Quentin Tarantino
John Woo
Yuen Woo-Ping
The Wachowskis
Production IG
JM Matthews
Brian Michael Bendis
Man of Action
Glen Murakami

George Lucas
Steven Spielberg
JJ Abrams
Akira Kurosawa
Michael Bay

Tite Kubo
Kristy Lijewski
Tsutomu Nehei

P a g e | 970

TV

JM Matthews
JG Quintel
Seth MacFarlane
Jay Leno
Gary Busey
Jhonen VAsquez
Steve Blum
Seth MacFarlane
Seth Green
Star Wars: Clone Wars
Brendon Small
Cartoon Network
Adult Swim
Williams Street
Dave Willis
Todd McFarlane
Metalocalypse
South Park
Trey Parker
Matt Stone
The Adult Swim Message Boards
Matt Maeillero
George Lowe
Adult Swim Narrators
Steve Brule
Eric Andre
Ben 10
Aaron McGruder
LeSean Thomas
Avatar the Last Airbender
Teen Titans / Go
Scott Menville
Steve Blum
Toonami
Rush Zone
Wild Grinders

P a g e | 971

Littlest Petshop
My Little Pony
Bronys
The Rock
DC Nation
King of the Hill
Uncle Grandpa
Toonami
Rob Paulson YakkoPinky
Charlie Adler
Genndy Tartakovsky
Kris Prynoski
Tara Strong
Wendee Lee
Chiara Zanni
Thomas Romain
Dan Green
Sean Schemmel
Colleen Clinkenbeard
Lance Heiskell
NickToons Network
Spongebob Squarepants
Squidward Tentacles
Toonami
TOM 1-5
Sara
Peter Cullen
Sean
IGPX
The Absolution
The other anime promo narrator who replaced Cullen on 2012 Toonami (name unknown)

--------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------Wednesday, April 9th, 2014,

I don't like being alone 24/7. Sometimes, just sometimes, I like the company of family and
friends. It's hard being alone all the time, 24/7. Solitude and being a loner gives me anxiety and
fear from time to time. Sometimes I like to be alone. Sometimes I enjoy a good conversation.
And sometimes I like to be out and about. I compensate with food, shopping, introspection, and

P a g e | 972

money. Most of the time I DON'T like being around other people. I find them arrogant,
obnoxious, invasive, and loud mostly, at least the ones around where I live. No personality, no
charisma. They've got nothing going for them. They really don't.
Thursday, April 10th, 2014,
With my Visas, I spend like the rich, and still manage to live like the moderately poor. But now
that my adoptive Dad's kind of on to me, I guess it's back to "conservative spending" again.
That $1,000 was good while it lasted. Not that I don't have more money, but since my father
asked me nicely, I'll oblige purely because he didn't yell this individual time.
-------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------Friday, April 11th, 2014, 4:26,
I now have 6 Credit Cards, 2 Bank Accounts (Bank of America, US Bank), and a few thousand
dollars. I don't own any money though, thankfully. I also have $50 in stock market money.
My French and Japanese language speaking-writing-hearing skills have gotten better. A LOT
better. Especially my Japan speak.
-------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------Saturday, April 12th, 2014, 1:26 PM.,
I don't know how well this business plan of mine is working,
but I'll know by the end of August 2023, and not a day sooner.
As for my previous ventures. They're all dead to me.
I'm no longer trying to make money in old media or the arts. Those are two of the most
hypercompetitive industries in the history of the world. Just because you've been playing fair
doesn't mean Seth MacFarlane and Steven Colbert are going to. Those guys never play or fight
fair. They assume no one notices their activities and the way they cheat at the game, just to gain
an unjustified, unfair advantage. I won't miss competing with people like that. I'm not competing
in TV. TV is racist and full of stereotypes. It sickens me. I've never been so happy to NOT
HAVE TO participate in such a horrible industry. It's a dying industry anyway.
....My neighbors darkness, evil, and animosity is not normal hatred and animosity (is it ever?).
I'm no longer viewing this situation between me and my neighbors as a human or ethical matter.
It goes beyond that. It's a religious matter. My neighbors are in fact Satan Incarnate. They're
possessed by the Devil, and I plan on calling a Christian Exorcist and the Church about this
Matter. I'm done with the torture and bigotry and racism. This Ends. Now. The Evil Shall be
Vanquished by the Church. If the Neighbors Souls (which are possessed by the Devil) can't be

P a g e | 973

cleansed by the Church, the whole WORLD will get painted Black. I don't want to see that
happen. There's definitely Satanic activity going on in Florida and Casselberry. An unholy
amount of noise pollution. God is on my Side. I know that much. My neighbors aren't just bad
neighbors. They're Unholy Terrorists, doing Satan and the Devil's Soulless Handiwork in the
name of Evil. I refuse to let these disrespectful inbred ingrates disparage my own father's legacy
of God's work. I inherited God from him, the Trappist Monk. If there's one thing the Sorrells
know, it's how to spot the Devil's Henchmen.
Neighbor: "I hate him!"
Me: Gee, you think. I hate Satanic people. You're Satan, the Devil. Of COURSE YOU'RE full of
Hatred. Hatred is the Devil. Kind of like YOU.
------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------Sunday, April 13th, 2004,
My online audience is in the million digits now, through Adwords. But it's come with a price.
Some of my nastier neighbors are targeting me for harassment more than ever currently, 1 or 2 of
them, as manifested most directly by neighboring animosity. They've either gotten very jealous
or gone extremely powermad, by hacker association. Doesn't bug or bother me though. They're
power mad. They sense my power and want it....But they'll be in for a rude awakening when they
discover they're NOT powerful like I am just "because they live near me". Dumb teenagers.
I guess haters are always gonna hate. Truth is people hate success. They're SCARED of it. Scare
of truly ACHIEVING it as I have. People can't handle the power, especially haters and hangers
on. They go power mad. No one can take my achievement away from me anymore. It's In
Me now. It's PART OF ME. It can't be stolen, bullied, big brothered,
spied on, NSA'd, Charlie Sheened, Gary Buseyed, Brian Johnstonized,
Chris Hansoned, Law and Ordered, Walter Whited, Peter Griffined,
Steven Colberted, Viacommied, Floridianized, Caligula'd, plagiarized,
harrassed, ripped off, manipulated, destroyed, killed, injured, or
robbed. It's in the soul. Success is part of one's character when it's
real. NOT a Manipulation Tactic. Success is too Strong to be destroyed once attained.

And I've attained it. Shhh. Don't TELL Anybody! Psyche!!

Walks out on to back porch at night, where father lurks with neighborhood cult who worships his
every word.
Look, "Dad". You drove home to be with me allegedly. I really TRIED to watch the movie with
you.

P a g e | 974

CARY: NO YOU DIDN'T!!!! YOU DIDN'T DO SHIT!!! YOU DIDN'T DO A GODDAMN

THING!!!! ALL YOU DID WAS DISRESPECTS ME!!! YOU'RE NOT MY SON!!!!! I'm
ASHAMED OF YOU.
Look, Pops, call the neighbors off my ass. As soon as you stop commandeering neighbors like a
cult leader to abuse and harrass ME, I'LL STOP KICKING YER ASS!!!
Monday, April 14th, 2014, 8:19,
Clarence premiered. Disappointing as is to be expected, much like Steven Universe. I was
already EXPECTING them to disappoint before they even got started, just like that loser Eric
Andre, but that's hardly a surprise, or even a shock. Just more convoluted selling out to the man
on Adult Swim and CN's part.
I was playing that addicting First Person Shooter online game Warmerise today. At first I played
beginner mode. Then I got a little more advanced and played on the military base level.
It got pretty crazy. I was running around the level. I was on the Blue Team. We were the good
guys. And we kinda got slaughtered by the superior online military team, The Red Team. My
guys kept getting killed. I kept getting killed and shot from behind and above and the side, and
we were outnumbered! Not fair. Red Team Cheats. It's pretty cool that FPS games teach
teamwork.
In terms of density of wording, Journals is quite a bit more word-dense than Akira and Cerebus.
Not with pictures, of course, but with traditional words. I've never surpassed their visual density,
but I've surpassed Dave Sim and Otomo's word-density. I'm closer to a Russian Novelist
integrated with Jack Kerouac nowadays, than I ever would be close to resembling Akira or
Cerebus. I'm a writer. A traditional nonfiction author. A Memoirist. I write traditional books and
screenplays. Not comics. Comparing my work to televisions shows and films, cartoons, and
anime? Bit of an unfair comparison. Why do people want to compare my weak areas to their
strong areas. Like I said, not a fair comparison. My work needs to be compared to traditional
literature, traditional books. Not quasi literature, TV fluff, and cinema or websites. I've partaken
in all those things, but internet aside, they are clearly not my strengths. I'm good with dense
wording and mythopoeia narration.
----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------Wednesday, April 16th, 2014, 1:40 pm,
Daniel Goleman's book, Focus: The Hidden Driver of Excellence, makes a
compelling case for various forms of hyperfocus. Enhanced memorization,
extended reading time, elongated attention span, longer durations of focus.
He's not a big fan of the new paradigm focus, which is multi-tasking,
distraction, giving into TV and YouTube watching, and twitter dabbling. Even
to the point of coming across in his prose like an intellectual exclusionary

P a g e | 975
snob about the whole thing. ("if Bertrand Russell were ALIVE today he would
shun you all! Yes, I am putting words in the mouth of a dead man") Even
though I love all that stuff (was a pioneer and inventor of much of its usage
and creation even) he does make a good point. Daniel Goleman seems to think
it's not good enough we read just One Paragraph or One Chapter from our
favorite book, but instead that we should gather and expand our focus to 4 or
more chapters a day. Instead of reading 4 books at once, read 4 chapters from
1 book at once, as the former type of concentration is "worthless". I don't
know if I agree that less focus is worthless (after all, my book series
manifesto was built on distraction and fractured concentration, but is still
an act of extended concentration if accumulated together, just like my comics
and novels would and will be if I ever get the hang of that, what with
thumbnails and paragraph long excerpts).

I especially enjoy the animation I drew of Me or Mono's foot kicking Cary in the middle of his
face, destroying his jaw and the entire lower half of his face. I just draw what I see.
I'm no longer sharing my art with my parents. That was a bad idea. Sharing your work destroys
your focus, so I've got to curtail my sharing habit even with Mom and Dad.
Art is no longer for therapy just to learn how to Deal With My Adoptive Father. Art is for
Beating Up My Adoptive Father.
Comics-Animation are whatever I want them to be. Comics-Animation is building something out
of nothing. Animation-Comics is building things and improving on things, making everyone see
old things in a new way. It's a way to build a Foundation and an Empire, much like how Silicon
Valley and Hollywood allows lucky people to do that very thing.
Other than Hybrid Fantasy Genres and the Paranormal and Ballistics and Military Politics, I like
to explore the theme of Power and Strength. Power and Strength as actual Human Emotions, and
Power and Strength as an Art Form (external perception of my work). Hence my dealings with
War, Conflict, Warriors, Bullies, Cults, Authority, Fictional Politics, and the Ultimate Fate of
Humanity.
There are three main emotional states one feels throughout the day:
Boredom, Stress, and the Flow State (The work state that accomplishes tasks)
I find I need to be alone in a room, completely by myself to get any good drawing done. Like the
office room, or my bedroom. The more solitude I have in my process, the better my art will look
when it's done. It's important to have that feeling of solitude of being alone. That unhindered,
unsupervised feeling. Makes it easier to focus and I'm a lot less self-conscious about my drawing
process.
In terms of getting more work done, and hyper-focus, or increasing my focus...Focus doesn't
need to be intensified, so much as it needs to be continually repositioned to focus on the same

P a g e | 976

task, on and off throughout the day, "not multitasking". A longer duration of focus (even an
inconsistent one) is a very powerful way to get more work done. I got 40 pages read in one book
today alone, simply by training and remind myself to stay on task and keep coming back to that
same one book for more reading and more continual focus. I just have to keep reminding myself
to stay on task, stay on one task, and not multitask so much, including not letting my mind drift
off to other tasks too much, unless it's in limited amounts.
--------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------Thursday, April 17th, 2014, 2:03 pm,
It's important. Never work for the single minded goal to attain money as either a writer or artist,
or writer-artist. That's destined to fail. Just like attempting to find a day job to make money will
inevitably Fail and make you nothing. There are easier ways to earn money. Put your mind to it.
You'll find a way. I did. Now I have a LOT of money. A Ton, actually. I'm certainly not working
for money or survival. And now that the payment necessity is eliminated because I already have
money to a degree, that cause of one of my stress factors makes it easier to get real work done.
Not worrying about money or public opinion, and working in private behind closed doors,
enhances focus on work.
I remain agnostic about my psychic and prophetic abilities. I'd LIKE TO believe in them, but I
need more proof than just a strong intuition, which I possess. Initially I didn't think I was a 22, or
a Scorpio, or an INTP, or an INFP, or a psychic or medium, or anything mystical at all. That
introspective lyricism came in my late adolescence. I may outgrow it all someday. I don't know
if labeling or self-identifying or self-proclaiming myself this or that is such a hot idea. That way
of thinking might just overcomplicate things. Not everything that gets written down in a
personality report or new age book is Biblical Truth.
--------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------Friday, April 18th, 2014, 12:00 am,
I might just have 9 or so books available for future availability and sale over at Amazon, give or
take a pair of manuscripts for my tweets and blog entries. So I'll either have 7 books available or
8 or 9 books available for sale. Give or take the new manuscript I finished for the End Times
Series Graphic Novel, which I've already published on Webcomics Nation. End Times is now 75
pages in length, in terms of manuscript size.
There's End Times, there's my Sketchbooks (Art Books), Blogs n' Journals, and Essays and
Fiction.
With the more confidence I gain as an author, auteur, and publisher of manuscripts, the more
manuscripts I will publish on Kindle. It takes a long time, but that is okay with me.

P a g e | 977

-------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------Saturday, April 19th, 2014, 12:40 pm,

Updated my LinkedIn page. Finally confessed I'm the author of the END TIMES comic book
saga. May as well. If I can't say it now, then when?
The Twenty-First Century's been mostly good to me so far. It was a rocky start from 2000-2004,
but From 2004 - 2014 so far, things got progressively better. I became more successful and my
reputation gradually grew and got bigger over time. My 20s were a volatile, unstable, chaotic,
hostile, scary and turbulent time. Especially on the media-home-front My 30s have had much
more stability and peace than my 20s. And I'm not even 1 year past 30 yet.
Appy Pie and Admob's monetization programs are so infamously bad and poorly set up for the
user/creator/publisher, they're almost as bad as Adsense for Blogger and Webcomics Nation.
They're all horrible at compensating talent in a way that doesn't drive people like me fucking
batty.
They're All. Fucking. InSANE.
If only someone could wake them up and see how everyone really views them, and not just let
them exist in this delusional little financial bubble where they rip their clients off.
-----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------Notes on The Parallax Notes
Ah, The Parallax Notes. That would be me taking my series bible and actually
turning it into a real Art and Literary Picture-Words Book. But I have so
much work done on Parallax. Do I have 600 pages of conceptual art and writing
done or more? Most of it is art (Character and Costume Designs, Lighting
Design, Production Design, Comics, Conceptual Artwork) along with some
tangential writing and written development notes (Outlines, Backstory, NewEarth History, Pilot Script). I realized years ago my little project is Dense
with a Capital D! It has a lot of Density. I can make that work in my favor,
too. Most Animation Style Guides are Neither Dense or Verbose. Mine is both
of those things.

I've never done a "The Art & Making of..." book before.
The Parallax Notes:
The Art and Making of the End Times Series
Perspective - camera shot-angles - Foreshortened Props/objects
Background

Mid-Ground

- Foreground

P a g e | 978

These are how camera shots and panel compositions are built, arranged,
and composed, with a beginning, middle, and end.

The Foreground. The beginning of the shot

The Mid-Ground. The middle of the shot
The Background. The end of the shot

--------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

I can't help but wonder. Jhonen spends a LOT of time talking about JR Goldberg. Are
they....Dating??! You know, when I think about it, they're not that bad of a power couple. Maybe
it's just my wandering mind thinking aloud here.

Wednesday, April 23rd, 2014, 8:25,

I'm a natural risk-taker. I have the courage to take dynamic risks. I risk my freedom to get even
more freedom.
--------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------Thursday, April 24th, 2014, 7:38 p.m.,
For the most part, unless they're Franco-Belgian or Japanese, I'm not interest in discovering new
up and coming artists and talent. The new stuff in the U.S. is something I don't find very soulful
or impressive. I prefer old established artists to new young ones any day. With incredibly rare
exceptions like Raynart and Fung Chin Pang and FSc.
------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------If anyone can see the difficulties and complications of drawing a page a day of comics, for life,
it would be me. I have every excuse in the book as to why logic would imply I can't and
shouldn't draw comics anymore. But fortunately, there isn't very much incentive to NOT put
effort in and draw a page a day, either. Currently, I'm setting up a page a day max limit of comics
getting drawn in one day. If I do more than 1 page of comics a day, I'll call that a "Happy
Accident". Whoops.
At this point I've become a bit muted to comparison and criticism. I truly do not give two shits
about competition and competing anymore. Comparing oneself to other artists is a selfdestructive mechanism and should be avoided at all costs. There's really only my individual
storytelling style. All comparisons to that style are irrelevant. It's pointless to think of oneself as
superior or inferior to any other artist, whether they live in Japan, Europe, or the United States.
They are them, I am me, end of story. There's no point in lingering in that space of comparison,

P a g e | 979

be it superior or inferior. I'm not them. They're not me, so why should I give two SHITS about
how some other artist can draw. I honestly don't care if some other artist is better or worse than
me, whether as an individual, an artist, or an "ethically-intellectually-hygienically superior
human being". It's ALL BULLSHIT in my eyes, so I tune it all out, ignoring it. Not that hard to
do. Once the weight and pressure of comparison is lifted, like the dark ominous storm cloud it is,
I find it's much easier and less stressful to work. Once again I am united with working conditions
that are actually workable. Nothing bothers or bugs me like it used to, socially, economically or
otherwise. Artists need freedom and peace to do their thing, and with the right mental state, that
peace and freedom is as good as achieved. I'm technically already in that kind of headspace.
Power Player In the Following Fields:

Online Advertising: 4 million impressions

Online Video: 100-500 Billion+ Views
Banned YouTube Account (SplitAtomBoom): 500,000 Views

Titans of Industry and Tycoons who my level of influence rivals:

Philo T. Farnsworth
Ted Turner
Sir. Tim Berners-Lee

------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------It's definitely not easy being one of the 100 Most Influential People and Pioneers in the World. I
don't need some silly list to feel vindicated or justified. The results of my influence and the
ubiquity of my influence is all the proof I need.
Want to know how to achieve Greatness. Read my journals from start to finish, the 6,000 or so
pages of them that there are. Before I ever wanted to be an inventor or engineer or tech giant, I
wanted to be a great comic book creator, writer and artist, and creator and executive producer of
my own animated series. Needless to say, things change over time. Some for the better, some not
so much. But life is stress. Life is change.
---------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------Friday, April 25th, 2014, 4:08 p.m.,
56 of the books I ordered in the last month have arrived at my house. And I've still got a few
dozen left to go!
------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------I am persecuted heavily by rogue federal spy vigilantes in the United States of America.

P a g e | 980

And my neighbors despise and bully me through the walls of my very house. I never have a quiet
moment. Almost never. I am accused of a poor disposition, and bad deeds as well as crimes I
never committed, perpetrated by look-alikes doppelgangers and evil twins.
They are All Satan's Army.
In France, Britain, and China, they treat me as a man of prominence, glory, holiness, and
prestige;
The Son of The King; The Son of A King; A Blessing From The Divine; The Half-Blood Prince.
Why am I so unwelcome where I live, but revered in places I've never been to in this lifetime,
but have been to in previous lifetimes, through spirit and cultural heritage. That is irony.
This contrast of both Justice and Injustice shall never be forgotten by the people of the world.
I am a long-lost and little known descendent
a Modern Ancestor and Descendent of Greatness
Descendent of St. Luke the Evangelist, Chronicler of The Gospel of Jesus H. Christ of Nazareth
and Descendent, of William I, the Conqueror, King of France, and First King of England.
A little bit of these Historic Figures and Leaders is in me,
Coursing through my DNA and My Blood. I Carry The Weight of Their Legacy.
--------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------Saturday, April 26th, 2014, 9:40 a.m.,
Upcoming Books I'm Working On:

New Earth Atlas (History)

The Parallax Notes
End Times Short Fiction Anthology
Oliver-E
Parallax Pilot Sequel Script
Warriors: An Art Book
Graphic Comic Sketchbook
The Phantom and the Voice on the Phone (Existential Novel)
December Waits (Epistolary Science-Fiction Drama)
Being and Consciousness (philosophy; science)
Epistolary Science Fantasy, Fantasy, Science-Fiction

P a g e | 981

It's not so much FLORIDA itself that I like so much as all the awe-inspiring Godly natural
beauty that happens on, in, around, and right next to it. You know all the things that drive
tourism and Disney World Patronage. Things like....The Bermuda Triangle, Cloud seeding, The
Stolen 2000 Election, Hacker Morons, Rebel Flags, Katrina, Guantanamo Bay Arab
Concentration Camps (which is right NEXT TO FLORIDA. May as well be Florida too), Nearby
Drug Raids, Sex Sting Operations on the News(!) (oh boy!), and Wardriving Ice Cream Trucks,
and of course, Bigoted Christian Bully Kids and Manchildren.
These things put Florida in such a POSITIVE LIGHT, don't they??
There's some redeeming qualities to Florida. I'm sure some cool people still live here, like The
Casselberry Family, Jennifer and Karen Almond, the Yingling family, and the Borges family.
Not to mention Clay L Holiday, Rima Jabbur, and Phil Ferretti, and former residents like my best
friend Chris Hess, my other best friend Jonny Bartlett, and almost all the classmates I attended
schooling with at Middle School like Amanda Martin, Lori Roth, Jason Carly, Ashley Pierce
(Ashley who currently resides in LA or Los Angeles, California, pursuing a dream career as a
Hollywood actress in Los Angeles. We are not so different, me and Ashley. I didn't realize that
initially though. I too have held and do hold dreams of "making it" in LA, but as a writer and
auteur producer, not an actor or performer), and Jonathan Green (well, I don't think Jonathan
ever really liked me that much or thought that highly of me), Elementary School, Pre-School,
Charter High School, and Art School. Just because I get a lot of shit from random strangers now
doesn't mean it was always that way. The public used to not know anything about me before the
internet killed most people's privacy. The only solution is to not use the internet.
It is odd. Being the simultaneous author, publisher, narrator, and protagonist of my own 6,000
page epistolary paragraph book series. I'm the star of my own life story, as well as the author and
narrator of the story. That's an odd thing to put into printed words. But at least it's something to
write about.
I'm an ambiguous figure to a degree. I am neither a protagonist or an antagonist.
Much like other fictionalized autobiographical authors and producers, such as Jerry Seinfeld and
Dave Eggers, I have a similar protagonistic status.
I prefer to refer to myself as a metafiction protagonist. I am both a character in a metafiction
narrative (my own), and a minor celebrity and local celebrity in Central Florida and the general
Orlando area, Casselberry, Florida in the United States of America.

P a g e | 982

P a g e | 983

P a g e | 984

Monday, April 28th, 2014, 8:11 a.m.,

...Like the bully outside and in the house next to me, that challenges my resolve, to live as a
professional artist and writer, every night and day by calling me incredibly racist and nasty
names all day and night. His goal IS to test my resolve as an artist and writer.
The story of my career is one of resolve, determination, and resolution, and the people who
wanted to challenge, defy, mock, and challenge that powerful resolve. Not just once, but
hundreds of times.

Unless the world is alive with action, characters, dialogue, plot, mood, climate, and atmosphere,
then the project most certainly is not finished.
Honestly, now that I'm getting to know Japan better, I'm starting to realize, a lot of my belief in
my own art was a tad bit arrogant. There's guys in Japan who draw the rough equivalent of half a
lifetime's worth of my drawing labor (painstaking, torturous labor) seemingly without even that
much effort in less than half a year. They literally spend every waking moment drawing. Much
as I'd like to compete with that, I'm not physically capable of doing THAT MUCH WORK. But I
highly admire artists who can fit that mold, both in Europe and Japan. I have talent, but God
didn't make me to function at that level of efficiency. I saw that level of efficiency in some artists
recently, and the amount of work he/they put into their art is unreal. There's nothing false about
it. It's ALL TRUTH. They just work harder than everybody else. I wish I could work as hard as
someone like Thomas Romain, but deep down I know I never will. I had to see it for myself,
literally see just how many drawings that studio is cranking out. Like I said, it's unreal.
Here's where things get...interesting. Through what seemed like almost a telepathy like
correspondence between my home in Florida and his studio in Japan....back around 2004 or 2006
or so, give or take, Katsuhiro Otomo himself began corresponding with me, telepathically,
through his work. And Hipira: The Little Vampire, his work that paid homage to my own success
and struggle and technique and content. He replicated my true style of END TIMES (Yes, the
GUY who created and half-singlehandedly drew AKIRA's theatrical and sequential art effort),
verbatim. And he made me realize things about my ingenuity and abilities and creative powers I
didn't realize previously. That I can do with words and prose what he does with pictures, design,
architecture, and general graphic illustrative art. He tapped into my Zen and Awakened that new
awareness of the context of my work. Some artist put in very little struggle to attain their vision
and get monumental results, like the kind of thing I said in the previous paragraph. I put in the
work and power of a freight train, and I still can't do any better than Tim Burton, with high levels
of vision, but simplified, iconic and primal levels of draftsmanship.

P a g e | 985

Adam Philips likes to act like a Ninja ghost and bully neighbors with his stereo system and
sniper voice. There's speculation he might be a serial killer. Either way, ADAM is an
AGGRESSIVE HITLER YOUTH SOCIOPATH AND PROUD HOMOPHOBIC BIGOT.
Spick. Knowing your enemy's name makes ALL the difference between them getting the drop on
you and, well, them NOT getting the drop on you. He also keep attempting to compromise my
computer security. He's not a hacker because he's "smart". He's a hacker because he has
assistance. From his baby momma. His girlfriend, who he lives with but is not married to. Nazi.

I cannot WAIT until Cary finally retires. He only knows how to work, not be a dad. Not
anymore. He has no method to teach me self-sufficiency and independence. If I listen to him I'll
never drive, cook for myself, OR get a job. I'd be an adult-child my whole life, and that would be
dangerous. What he's set up for everyone is a dangerous disaster waiting to happen. His cult like
persona needs to die. He needs to get a life. Not just a job. He has no ways of managing his anger
or stress, or letting other people do things for him. He never thanked me when I showed him how
to look at sent emails. Now he's yelling at some poor schmuck on his cell phone. Why do I
suspect he's going to have a bad reputation after he dies?

Thursday, May 1st, 2014, 1:17 pm,

Great artists steal all their poses. I don't make up poses. I steal all of mine.

Anah sekika
Hanata saka
Mihini shi-ki
Fumuneshi-tah
Fumu tah neshi-ka
Domo
Konnichiwa
Sayonara

Saturday, May 3rd, 2014, 12:44,

The two most iconic events and stories in American History and World History, in my own
opinion, are World War II, and the Bible. They focus on two central figures: One the definition
of good guy (religion), and the other the definition of bad guy (genocide, war).

Jesus H Christ
Adolf Hitler

P a g e | 986

Jesus was God

Hitler was Satan

Jesus was the Hero

Hitler was the Villain

Hitler Started and Built a War

Jesus Started and Built a Religion

Both men are clearly the figureheads of their stories

But what do we truly know of the stories of World War II and the life and teachings of Jesus.
Both stories are epics. Large in scope, with many main and minor characters and players, that
travel to lands far and wide, whose word of mouth has reached every corner of the globe.

Religion and Military.

Peace and War

I want to know more about history. I feel as though knowing more about history, studying
history, would enhance my literature.
The Story of Jesus of Nazareth is a complex and longwinded one. Just as the story of WWII is.
But the two stories are not one and the same. One is a story of sin against humanity, the other a
story of saints against sin. There's plenty of violence and prejudice in both genre of stories, but
that doesn't make them any less compelling and dynamic of a set of narratives.
Jesus was born in a manger on what would come to be known as Christmas Day, to the Virgin
Mary and Father Joseph of Nazareth. Jesus died on the cross, sold out by his former "disciple",
Judas; crucified and looked down upon by the Jewish Roman Empire. And upon his death, Jesus
may or may not have Ascended to Heaven from the Hands of Death, only to be reunited with the
Lord Father God.

Monday, May 5th, 2014, 5:13 pm,

I find the capital of carnage and pandemonium isn't the Middle East. It's The American Suburbia,
where people torture small animals, torment the people living near them, sell sex, firearms, and
drugs, hold endless sex orgies in their "Horrible Music Parties", and kill other people in their
living rooms, bedrooms, and kitchens. If you want peace and quiet and silence, don't even
THINK about visiting the American suburbs. Sure, it makes a good horror or suspense movie,

P a g e | 987

like the kind of stuff my brother watches, but it's not a very pleasant place to live much of the
time.
I have all the power and success I could ever hope to have. My dream has come true. I'm famous,
a local and worldwide celebrity inventor and content master. In the end I got what I wanted:
Power, influence, and fame. The price: I'm always being Yelled At. People hollering dumbshit at
me at all waking hours of the day. Not having a moment of peace, privacy, and quiet. Never,
EVER having time to hear myself think, the outside reaction to my high functioning autism, is an
extreme one. I'm constantly hounded and ridiculed by neighbors and people in the media. It's a
vicious evil Beast from the Pits of Hell that pursues me, the Messenger of The Heavens. But
fortunately I got the Lord-God on my Side. My Book is the Cross That I Raise.
Longest 20 days of my....LIFE! Things will get better, but daaaamn, that's a long wait for bad
evil shit to pass. That's a long time to watch my parents and neighbors refuse the offers of Peace
and Change. Essentially telling God Himself to "Go jump in a lake, there's nothing you can offer
us. Go sit and spin, God. We don't have time for you around here". Well, I'm going back to
Church. I've had enough. Enough of these Godless drug addled heathens. These Bigots. These
gluttonous parents. I'm going back to Church for peace and quiet, where it's always quiet and
Lord-God is always welcome. I'm tired of watching Queen Elaine Dr. and Guinevere getting
drowned in racism and sin. It's ungodly.
The most important people I know are Katsuhiro Otomo, Yoshitoshi Abe, Barack Hussein
Obama, John Lasseter, Hayao Miyazaki, and my biological parents: My Real Mom and Dad,
Mary Ann Gaynor and Glendis Ralph Sorrell, with my Mother having ancestry of Saints and
European Royalty, and my father also having ties to the Kingdoms of England and France, who
saw me as a newborn baby, but never anytime afterwards. They had to watch me grow up from a
distance. I'm the only long-lost member of the British Royal Family living in the state of Florida,
living in a place such as Central Florida purely because no one recognizes my status or
reputation as such. Or most of the United States for that matter. It was purely a matter of special
circumstance I was put in this important and powerful social position. Technically, I'm a
disowned Prince, a Blue Blood. Technically, yes, I am a British Prince. A very disinherited
prince, but a Prince nonetheless.
Mono is the Black Swordsman Warrior of Justice. He protects the Throne of Democracy. I think
me being a member of the British and French Monarch, indirectly, shall serve as excellent
inspiration for my Regal Stories of the Fantastical. Like Tolkien, but for a modern world. Damn
Tolkien was a mighty fine storyteller.
The Book of Kings and Scripture. That's my Book. Yes Sir!

P a g e | 988

Tuesday, May 6th, 2014,

Memoir
A Novel
Prince Joseph sat at a computer chair, working on his novel, as his brother, Andrew was over
visiting, droning on endlessly to their step mother, about nothing at all. He was unstoppable,
Prince Joseph thought. Once Andrew started babbling about stupid shit, not even a freight train
could stop him. Prince Joseph found his step brother incredibly annoying, irritating, and
frustrating. Prince Joseph sat on the couch in the living room, rolling his eyes over Andrew time
after time. He's all talk and no action, Prince Joseph thought to himself. Just a muttering,
babbling fool.
Andrew finished speaking to his step mother Peggy. He drove off in his expensive rental BMW,
off on another pointless adventure.
Prince Joseph decided he didn't want any part in his step brother's life. While Andrew was a
good buffer and defensive bodyguard against neighborhood thugs, and bullies, Andrew also
annoyed Prince Joseph quite a bit.
Prince Joseph resumed writing his novel, alone in his office, while his step mother heated up
some coffee and poured herself some afternoon wine in the family kitchen.
The sky outside was crisp, clear, and blue. Nearly cloudless.
Camelot was a forest. Woods. A neighborhood of houses and street-sidewalk cement built on dirt
and trees. There was hardly anything regal or fancy about the view outside the Albert household
window to their front yard. The sun was out and it was the middle of the day.
--------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------Wednesday, May 7th, 2014, 12:43 pm,
As much as things have changed some things never do. To publish a mainstream book, writers
still need a literary agent for their book. Self-publishing doesn't make much of a difference. I
should know, I've self published tons of books and comics, and it hardly made a dent in the
market.
Zen and the Art of Writing a Great Query Email. Writing Query Email Letters is a Zen Art. One
I plan to master. Agents start careers with a query letter. The query letter has to be well written.
It needs to be well written and use correct English. It's important to leave a good, strong first
impression. Agents (even in the age of the internet) are the gatekeepers. Between authors and
mainstream publishers, both for fiction and nonfiction works.

P a g e | 989

I'd rather DIE than draw right now, be it design or comics. The pretension of the majority of
modern artists in the mainstream and anime scene is something I loathe, despise, and detest. I
don't look like an artist. I look like an author-scientist, what with my facial hair and lack of
physical prowess. I look like a storyteller of the page, like Stephen King or a Russian Novelist,
Albert Einstein or something. I don't know if I look my age. But I look the way I'm supposed to.
I still have passion for words. I'd rather embrace the talent I do have than try to conjure a talent I
might not have.
Spoiler!
Publishing and Promoting END TIMES: the Series is what I "Really Want To Do". It's a
Pleasure. It's good for my wallet.
Publishing Journals is what I "Really Need to Do". It's a Responsibility. It's good for my Soul.
------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------Thursday, May 8th, 2014, 10:17 am,
I've begun querying agencies for possible representation (if they like my writing of course), and
fortunately I'm not nervous, and my life won't be ruined by getting rejected, if it comes to that.
I've had to query letter rejections so far. Hasn't phased me. I've submitted to all 4 of the major
traditional nonfiction agencies on my list, now I wait to hear back from them. I sent them one
killer query letter, if I got a letter like that from someone else, I'd be pretty darn intrigued.
Some authors make six-to-eight figures a year. Will old Mr. Joseph ever have cash stacks that
phat? Hard to say. Would be nice though. I try not to think about money too much. I'm just a
writer. I was never concerned about a writer's salary before. I don't see why I should be
concerned now. Money used to be something I relegated only to art. But when you think about it,
some writers made themselves a lot of money. Isn't that what agents do? Find you a publisher
and a paycheck? Dunno.
In terms of how to convey Power and Strength through Graphic-Literature Density, I only
admired a select and limited group of Graphics-Literature authors.

Leo Tolstoy
Dave Sim
Isaac Asimov
Katsuhiro Otomo
Osamu Tezuka
JRR Tolkien

My obsession with their "mastery of the fantastical and imaginatively ingenious" was but a mere
bi-product of the heart of the matter:

P a g e | 990

My admiration for their conveyance of Graphic-Literature Density. Cramming all details

together on a page, up to the minutest detail, as to create both the magical illusion and reality of
one or many pages density. There have been a handful of other, less notable authors who have
been as productive, and done as much work probably, but community isn't the point. You don't
have chatrooms or message boards for accomplishments like this. There IS NO COMMUNITY
for the dense and prolific. Just Greatness. I don't just want the roads I paved to be dense. I also
want them to be Powerful, Strong, Mystical, Stoic, Regal, and Long, Winding, Meandering.
Labyrinthine. In the Japanese Manga and Classic Russian Novel Tradition. I may not live to see
that dream created as a Novel or Comics Trade Series or Anthology, but I've ALREADY lived to
see it Built and Manifested as a Memoir and Epistolary Narrative. Sure beats the hell out of
midday TV. It's too "Academic" and "Literary" for that in some ways. Why even waste my time
with motion media anymore. I have no control in the worlds of film and television. I have a
surplus of control as an author, writer, and illustrator of the fantastic. I honestly don't know if my
achievement will ever rival my ambition. But it is fun to try. Isn't it?
I've written a lot, but still want to write more.
Kind of like how Forbes magazine knows everyday people are getting ripped off by faceless,
soulless, billion dollar corporations, probably without even knowing it. Yet for some reason they
still want to rub people's noses in this scandal, not even attempting to discourage it but instead
having the balls and audacity to promote it, the shameless fraudulence of "success" and other
brags of arrogance, committed by the fat cats, of all things.
They won't quit, so I don't think I will, either.

6,000 written word processor pages

20,400 tweets
2,000 pages of artwork
1,645 Blog Posts
Apparently my net worth now sits at $5,500.00.
Not bad. What can I say. Haters gonna hate.
The credit company that gave me all my large revenue when I used their product, is now
the largest public company in the world in the United States: JPMorgan Chase.
Their assets?
$2.3 Trillion

P a g e | 991

When writing a narrative, it is important not to give your characters, heroes, and protagonists an
easy time, too much compassion from others around them, or preferential treatment, or an easy
win. Storytelling needs to be quite the opposite, if it's going to be memorable. The good guys
need to have that much more struggle, pain, and suffering to overcome, and the villains need to
be that much more diabolical, cunning, sneaking, devious, canniving, single minded,
sociopathic, psychotic, sadistic, and selfish. We need to see the bad guy's quirks. Eventually
know him and his life, and why he hates the hero and peace and harmony so much. The more
sadistic the bad guy, the more memorable he or she will be. AS A VILLAIN of course. Like my
neighbors. My neighbors make GREAT VILLAINS, and I'll be sure to cover that in my novel or
script or comic book.
The IsraeliPalestinian conflict. Israel and Palestine and their wars, conflict, and negotiation
with one another. I haven't written about that yet. Not once in my entire life. But I'd like to write
about it. I'm planning on researching it. The geography, the world history. The culture. The
Wars. The Conflict and Lack of a Resolution. It's a big issue. It deserves some literature. Not
that it doesn't already have that to a degree. But it's all more current events than actual narrative.
Other than news stories of course.
-------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------Saturday, May 10th, 2014,
Actually, I'd say ALL villains in my story are racists. Pretty much.
Racism IS the main villain of most of my stories. Prejudiced and bigoted people are Satan.
They're Satan's and the Devil's handiwork. So I like to show the world just how twisted and assbackwards their psyches, brains, perceptions, and "reasoning skills" are. I'm curious as to what
made these particular individuals so hateful to begin with. Were they ABUSED. Were they
BULLIED by someone stronger than them. Obviously there wasn't a caring parental figure in
their life to keep them from ending up how they do today. Are they under the influence of
DRUGS/ALCOHOL, of which they have an addiction. It can be hard to understand the logic of
villains, mostly because they don't actually have any.
Sunday, May 11th, 2014,
Lindsey....Listen. We need to talk. I think I put the wrong ideas in your head. You don't have
what it takes to draw manga. You don't have a thick enough skin, you don't listen to input, and
you're too insecure. Plus you don't seem to work hard enough. Real manga artists work day and
night. You barely work for half a day each week. Do you really think you're putting enough work
into this thing to make it in the big time manga scene and be remembered? But then again you
seemed to have stopped wanting to be my protg a long time ago...

P a g e | 992

There was a lot of mainstream and online "underground" backlash against me in the first 2
decades, or the beginning of the New Millennium. Constant displays of my legal name and real
face in public settings, fraudulently presented as "someone who isn't Joe", or "Our Joe but not
that Joe". Just a tsunami of frauds, clones, hucksters, clowns, and general exploitation and
backlash. So I was driven into hiding to a certain degree. I stopped posting on the accounts
people knew me by. Two of the websites I loved to go to, Adult Swim and YouTube both ended
up permabanning my most successful and famous accounts anyway. I stopped posting, with rare
exceptions. My livelihood and reputation were under assault and in danger. To say nothing of my
privacy and mental and physical health.
I've done a pretty good job of keeping a low profile. Had time to realize if I don't put anything
out, nothing can get back in. All this while living in the same house as two roomate families"
(Andrew's family, and Cary's family) who was active in the community I was living with. That
and they forced me to take medication and go to therapy, and extorted me in an effort to subdue
me and get me to relent to their own will power and "cooperate". It was ALL Against My Will.
My fame. My family situation. The way the public and authority figures viewed me. Just one big
endless charade. I grew to deeply hate and resent both family's for keeping me in that kind of a
horrible position. It did not involve a single shred of consideration for my needs, my true needs,
and feelings, my life ambitions, what I wanted to do. But at least I have this book series that
came out of all of it.
And my infamous neighbors ended up becoming movie stars, by ending up as the antagonists in
the movie "Neighbors" staring Seth Rogan. The Number one movie in America which took in
over 50 mill in the first 3 DAYS, beating out spider man too. It's official. The world hates my
neighbors and ALL their parties. If that's not the ultimate poetic justice (public shaming,
flogging, and humiliation against them for their disruption, bad behavior, and general sin and
disrespect), I don't know what is. At least it'll keep em busy with more than just me now. They
got what they deserved.

Tuesday, May 13, 2014, 2:02 pm,

It's midnight. Early morning Tuesday, late night of Monday.
I find myself consumed by rage and vengeance. So I don my trenchcoat, put on some socks, and
some black sneaker shoes, tie my shoes, and walk into my parents room.
I'm going out, I mutter. I'll be back soon.
With my trenchcoat cloak, I proceed to leave my house at midnight. It's a full moon out, I notice.
My hands are in my pockets. I walk down the street, past the stop sign with the rotting
decomposing street paint. Up till this point, no one is outside, and I was passed by only one car.

P a g e | 993

It's like I'm a Ghost or something. I am a Phantom haunting the streets of Camelot at the
midnight hour, stalking past house after house at the midnight hour, hands in pockets. Eventually
after much walking down streets, I see an intersection, and a sign next to it, with no cars driving
on it at the moment. The sign says "Guinevere".
Ahhh. I say to myself. So THIS is the street pissing everyone else in Florida off. I proceed down
the road to the left of me. These are some trashy looking houses. If I hadn't heard so much noise
coming from them previously, I could swear they were abandoned. But I know better. I clutch
my hand gun, and proceed to keep walking. Until I reach the houses that have been making all
the noise. I'm standing in front of all 4 houses, the responsible parties. No one comes out to greet
me.
I proceed to open fire.
blllllatttatataatatatatatatatttatttatttaattttah
I guess this isn't so funny to them, now that I'm calling them out in their front yard.
I'm done shooting. Still no one comes out to fight or greet me. They're hiding from me and my
hand guns. Afraid of being seen. I wish I had brought my camera. Maybe next time.
I proceed to walk back in the direction I came. At this point I have been walking for almost a
mile. I'm out of breath. Exhausted as all hell.
Eventually I make it back home, I grab a cold bottle of water from the fridge and collapse on the
couch after putting the air conditioning fans on full blast, my clothes covered in perspiration. The
deed has been done. I'm lying on the couch breathing heavily, loudly, not sure if I'm going to
pass out from the assassination mission.
Somehow I make it through.
The cats come to greet me and rest on my stomach as I lie on my back on the couch, drenched in
midnight sweat, not regretting my actions one bit.
Awesome
Nice WHITE pick up truck you got there.
THE END
--------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------Positive News and Achievements in my life:

Ramin Zahed
Dave Sim

P a g e | 994

Cerebus Article
Amazon Kindle Self Publishing
Units Moved on Amazon
Google Play Apps Downloads (100+)
Alex Toth books
Chase Credit
Appy Pie Money
Yoshitoshi Abe
Thomas Romain
Space Dandy
The Fool Project
Neighbors Film
Shoji Kawamori
Query Letter Writing Season
23 and Me Royalty DNA Test
JP Morgan Chase 2 Trillion
Stanford Online (Coarsera)
The First Dark Fantasy Art Book (My Book)
Blank Sketchbook hardcover (comics)
Keeping a Low Profile

Favorite Dojinshi / Self-Published Artists:

Yoshitoshi ABe
CLAMP
Todd McFarlane
Dave Sim
Jim Mahfood
Raynart
Jeff Smith
Rob Schrab

I hope I get to become a famous auteur animetion and comics-manga artist some day like
Yoshitoshi ABe and Alex Toth are, when I age, if I'm not already. Currently I feel more
infamous than famous, so...tough call.
Current direct artistic influences as a Designer:

Alex Toth (US)

Yoshitoshi ABe (JP)
Bande Dessinee Tomes (FR)

P a g e | 995

Dave Sim (CA)

Craig Thompson (US)
Hayao Miyazaki (JP)
Greg Capullo (US)
Akira Toriyama (JP)
Todd McFarlane (US/CA)

I feel like, in terms of reference material, the stuff I've bought recently trumps a lot of things.
Especially Alex Toth. Makes me feel like Bruce Timm himself, studying directly from one of the
great Masters of both Western Comics and Animation, Illustrating and Animating. My Toth
studies really brought the comic book page I based on them to life. The usage of heavy blacks on
my first heavy black ink comic book anthology non-loose-leaf page really felt like the page came
to life for a minute there.
--------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------Wednesday, May 14th, 2014, 10: 19 a.m.,
There is one pick I trick to drawing I picked up that helps build confidence. Picturing the process
of other artists when I draw. Imagining I'm Bruce Timm when I fill in black space. Or Syd Mead
or Katsuhiro Otomo and Moebius when I draw density and detail and bells and whistles in my
designs and architectonic imagery.
We live with a very comparative media and public fandom for our comics nowadays. No one
wants to give a guy credit for doing his own thing. There's that stupid, fake-assed "Ooh. So who
are you supposed to be copying and plagiarizing like everyone else" Everyone who's original and
new the media and fans want to compare to somebody similar, even when your not even familiar
with their work or art, and haven't even looked at any of it, let alone be a fan of it or plagiarize it.
That's actually quite annoying
Whether they're comparing me to Osamu Tezuka, Eichiiro Oda, Mike Mignola, Frank Miller, or
Tite Kubo, you always get compared to someone, regardless of how illegitimate that comparison
ultimately is.
END TIMES is a fusion comic. It's a Fusion of Goth & Noir (Goth-Noir) and Manga & Comics
(Manga-Comics). It's a Gothic-Noir Manga-Comic.
--------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------Thursday, May 15th, 2014, 3:26 pm,
I'm planning on becoming a wealthy millionaire by the age of 32, as an appreneur.

P a g e | 996

I'm not sure HOW my life and work and the industry segments I've become involved in will
chronicle my life and output. I did and do a lot of things. I talked to a lot of people. Would
people make coffee table art and writing books about me, or would it be a Bill Gates, Spielberg,
George Lucas, or Ed Catmull Creativity Inc. type publishing deal, where it feels more like a
traditional biography. Would there be pages of my writing, photocopies and layouts with my art,
and/or photographs from my early life. And what of websites
Some good musicians: Jay-Z, Radiohead, Tupac, Nine Inch Nails, Eminem, Limp Bizkit,
Bloodhound Gang, The Aquabats, Beethoven, Dethklok, MC Chris, Dr. Dre, Gorillaz, Damon
Albarn, Morrisey, Sixpence None the Richer, Marilyn Manson, Michael Jackson, Beastie Boys,
Testament, Metallica, Primus, They Might Be Giants, Slipknot, Eels, Mark Oliver Everett,
Disney Feature Animation, Danny Elfman, Method Man, Redman, Aqua, Five Iron Frenzy,
Orange County Supertones, Smashing Pumpkins, Nirvana, Foo Fighters, Weezer, Thom Yorke,
Rivers Coumo, Miles Davis, Goldfinger, Real Big Fish, Presidents of the USA, DMX, UNKLE,
Tool.
------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------Friday, May 16th, 2014, 11:48 a.m.,
Products:

App - o
Comic Book One Shot - o
Pocket Artbook - o
Short Stories Novella - o
Pilot Script - o
Memoir Series - o
Graphic-Literary Series Bible - o
DVDs - o
Website - o
Digital Video File - o
Online Video Broadcast Channel - o
Video Algorithm - o
Online Comics - o

Comic Book Trade Paperback - x

--------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------In AdMob money, I've already earned a 2 month percentage of my total possible future income:
$18K a year. I'm on my way to earning over $18,000 a year.

P a g e | 997

The loan of $2,000 I withdrew through my credit cards is technically already repaid. I've already
earned back its equivalent with Google Android Market. Now that's out of the way, it's time to
focus on something besides debt. Like L.A.D.: Life After Debt. Buying a house. Buying a car or
S.U.V, paying for a personal driver and cook, paying my bills, moving and relocating to get the
fuck away from the horrible demonic voices of verbal venom and mean people assaulting my
former house in Casselberry, Florida, Seminole County, and other such business liabilities as the
external voice coming from all directions. Who can work in such an ominous location? No one!
That's who! If I leave for good I'll literally have nothing of value to return to. Just a bright future
ahead of me. Many days of sunshine, silence, loner solitude, and prosperity That sort of thing.
But in reality, the rude, vicious, condescending, sociopathic, arrogant, downright evil sounding,
derisive, and deliberately annoying voices of neighbors living down the street and on Guinevere
are my biggest motivating factor to succeed. They are the evil and injustice of the day and
evening, the audio torture sessions, that keep me up late at night, motivated to beat them and
succeed sooner or later, eventually, somehow, and at some point. The more I hear those kids
make those voices in protest of my presence in this neighborhood, the more determined and
single minded desire to find a doorway out of this audible nightmare. The will to success. I keep
working towards my goals and never stop working for my goals because I know if I Don't focus
on those things, that just means those voices will be a part of my future because I'd still end up
being here in Casselberry Florida. In the Red State Southeast, the most horrible, rudest, noisiest
place on earth with a higher suicide rate than China. The People's Republic of Florida. There's no
changing this place. There is only evade and narrowly escape. I'm headed for the Blue. Bloogle.
Failure means I have to spend MORE time with these horrible sub-human racist fuckwits than I
already do. Therefore failure isn't an option. Success is the only option for me. That's just the
way it is.
------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------Sunday, May 18th, 2014, 10:30 am,
Hired my first tech company employee and programmer this morning. Today. He's busy at work
on my newest spec app concept. He's employed by me. He's getting a sum payment from me for
his work and everything.
I used O Desk to hire him, the freelancing website where you can hire and apply for jobs. I had 4
applicants apply for my job. I could only afford one.
My current employee is very talented. He seems to be quite fluent in coding, programming, ware
building, apps, Android, and engineering. All the necessities anyway, so I'm not worried about
him being up to the job. I'm compensating him with just the right amount to do a decent job on
the project.

P a g e | 998

My app idea. This is one of the first inventions I came up with that I'm actually getting to build,
that I'm taking from concept stage to building and distribution stage. Initially I figured I'd be
doing it as traditional software, but then I instated my policy on apps. How all my programming
ideas will probably end up as apps.
Like a Boss. I'm the Boss! And I've got One Employee. A Team of Two.
I'm really proud of my various companies, both media and consumer. It's good to be the boss.
I'm also very proud of my employee. I admire his skill and ability to do the things I cannot. We
make a Good Team.
My employee(s) are working very, very hard. They're working so hard. So much that it's
impossible to pull him out of his work trance. He's busy writing code, like a true Code Master.
Good to know my investment and payment was worth what I invested.

Monday, May 19th, 2014, 4:19 pm,

Outsourcing programming work to overseas is one of the most useful production techniques I
picked up as a boss and employer of a tech company.
StreamWave Developers is an outsourcer. I hired someone overseas from oDesk to work for me
because he knew how to do the work. Bottom Line. Race and Nationality are irrelevant. My tech
& media company is a world company now. It's worldwide.
----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------Wednesday, May 19th, 2014, 7:58,
It's Over. It's finally over. The years of servitude, bondage, slavery, and illegal human-rightsviolating narcotherapy...are over. For the first time in 17 years, I'm not being bullied into taking
pills to "Solve my problems". It's over. I'm done. This is the happiest I've been in forever. My
soul is free. Now I can stay up as late as I like, and eat a lot, but still manage to lose weight.
I've dreamed of this day. Or night. Both. The era of my life with total freedom. Free from the
influence of pills. Not having to sleep all night. Insomnia lottery. I've hit the Insomnia Lottery.
And I couldn't be happier. It took some extremely aggressive negotiation with my stubborn and
misguided parents, but it finally happened. I'm finally cured and pure. And now I shall be Fueled
by the overnight skies. While the world sleeps, I get to have fun, work till the early hours of the
morning, watch overnight TV, eat snacks like popcorn, pizza, and other such sweet tooth
delicacies. My Night Owl Tendencies have been repressed for almost two whole decades. But I
sense as long as I keep my guard up and my wits about me, the Night Owl Insomnia BeasT, The
Liberator of a great many nations shall be unleashed. Plenty of stuff happens at night when we

P a g e | 999

are all asleep. But I have no desire to ignore that activity as my parents and neighbors do. I broke
free from all that. It was a miracle. And not a small one. A Big Miracle. A Miracle of the Spirit.
Finally I'm not a Domestic Prisoner of the Western Southeastern Daylight. I get to be a Creature
of the Night and North, too. Consciousness in the Moonlight, is the coolest thing ever. I feel at
home again. The night is surrounded by quiet and black. The day is Noisy, Loud, and Light. It's
Horrible. I've ALWAYS believed in [Questioning Sleep].
Now I can REALLY enjoy [adult swim], by being able to stay up to watch the whole damn
thing. It used to eat me alive I wasn't able to do that. If they had ended up canceling all their
shows like Toonami and GI Joe, I don't know what I would have done. I would have blamed
myself for being unable to contribute to ratings, for "reasons beyond my control". It's not like I
ever could have said the REAL reason I couldn't stay up all night and a.m. to watch.
[The Midnight Chronicles]
Ask Not For Whom the Bell Tolls.
It Tolls for Thee...

Currently Reading and Studying for Artistic Purposes:

The Art of Wolfenstein: The New Order (collective)

The Phantoms of the Louvre by Enki Bilal (France import book)
Genius, Isolated: The Life and Art of Alex Toth
Genius, Illustrated: The Life and Art of Alex Toth
The Legend of Zelda: Hyrule Historia
Genga: Original Pictures by Katsuhiro Otomo
The Art of Todd McFarlane: The Devil's in the Details

It will take a while to heal, from all the damage. But as long as I am not dead, I will always Heal,
both myself and Other Things.
I came up with a truly good idea. I'm going to draw the Bible and Jesus in pen and ink
illustrations, Bruce Timm, Alex Toth, Frank Miller, and Mike Mignola film neo-noir style. The
only "color" I will use in these upcoming illustrations is the color red, for Jesus' threads, to
symbolize the passion Christ had in his message, and the blood he spilt in his Ultimate Sacrifice
he paid in his Crucifixion. I don't know whether I'd call that religious or secular. No idea. It
could be both, it could be either.
I'm Tellin Em! It's gonna be AWESOME! Just like God Is.

P a g e | 1000

Everyone around me is obsessed. They're obsessed with Hoping and Praying for my Downfall.
No doubt about that anymore. People are going to great lengths in attempts to have me destroyed
and Crushed, because I resist. I'm a member of the Resistance against Hitler Youth Neo-Nazis,
Rich Right Wing Bureaucrats, Hackers and cyber-vigilantes, anti-pedophiles, racists,
homophobic people, stereotype perpetuators (in America), Doctors, Anti-Obama, AntiChristians, The South, Florida, stalkers, cyber-stalkers, Neighbors, White Trailer Park Trash
White Supremacists Aryan Brotherhood types, bigots, zealots. And any combination therof,
which of course there is. I want to watch them die as much as they want to watch me Die. I will
not lose. They are VERMIN to me. I vow to crush them all, for destroying both my birth parents
and attempting to destroy me. This is my Manifesto against ALL OF THOSE THINGS. I hate
them with a passion. With every Fiber of My Being, Now and Forever Throughout the Universe.
My parents want to see me obliterated and crushed. My Adoptive parents. The ones in my life
now. They want to spiritually torture me, and watch me squirm. I ain't gonna let them do it if I
have anything to say about it. I couldn't care less who's on their side. I will use my Scorpio
Stinger against Every Single One of Them. If push comes to shove. I will win. I guarantee you
that.
I am indeed a "hate the haters" type of fellow. I believe in this philosophy wholeheartedly. If
you've got any amount of hatred towards me, I've got plenty to throw right back at you. Yes.
YOU. ALL OF YOU. Every last one of you. If I could punch your ass out, I guarantee I would
have done it a long time ago. But oh those wooden fences, they tend to make things so difficult
for me. Like stopping me from running across my neighborhood and plowing into some guys.
Oh well.
Christ DIED for my sins. That's something I can understand now. All this trauma and drama in
my life has made me realize it's a test a faith. Jesus the Lord-God has a higher purpose for me,
and FUCK What the world says or claims about me. They can all GO TO HELL. ESPECIALLY
my NEIGHBORS. They're SATAN. They have no real faith in God, and it's part of what made
me MAKE the decision to abandon medication and pharmaceutical drugs and become a private
Born Again Christian. God was the ONLY thing keeping me alive through all this injustice,
prejudice, and insanity I sensed in everyone around me. If they WANT TO GO TO HELL AND
BURN THERE FOR ALL ETERNITY FOR THE WAY THEY TREATED ME AND ONLY
ME, that's THEIR choice I guess. Me. I have faith in God. I may have "nothing". But I do have
faith in Jesus the Lord God. That picture I drew of Jesus was my Overnight Baptism by Fire. An
Initiation into my own Higher Graces.

Saturday, May 24th, 2014,

Interesting. Been Three days since I wrote anything here. Well, that is because I literally have
dozens of different accounts online right now. I'll have to make a list of all of them at some point

P a g e | 1001

on this word processer. I write the pre-draft of a lot of my blog columns in Microsoft Word
before I publish them on Blogger.
Projects that are really taking shape:

The Parallax Notes (on its way)

Parallax: Druidon Pilot Script (complete)
Fill-It-Up Hardcover 200-pg Graphic Novel

That last one is a new production style I'm trying with making End Times comics. Sequential Art
Sketchbook. I've recently begun to fill a lot of the panels with solid black to add that extra sense
of heaviness to their pages. It's showing drastic improvement in terms of the quality of the
sequential art. Other than all that, busy with Twitter, Blogger, ActionToonTV, credit cards,
Amazon.fr, and stream garage.
New Teachers:
Thomas
ABe
Tom Hart
Richard Hong
Takashi (Japanese Teacher)
The difference between these Phil, Donna, and Rima, and Clay is that the new teachers are ones I
personally hand-selected to help me. My Disciples.

Saturday, May 25th, 2014, 5:04 p.m.,

So I think I'll be taking art, comics, and storytelling lessons from Hutch Owen creator Tom Hart
later this year. It seems like a great opportunity to learn from someone so experienced and
successful in comics. Tom Hart is a real life pro just like Phil was at one point.
It's my NEW friends! Matthew Cicero, Jhonen Vasquez, Thomas Romain, Nicole Cook, Tom
Hart, ABe Yoshitoshi...I think that's pretty much it.
Currently checking out: Digital copies of the hard-to-find series Eldritch! by Aaron Alexovich.

P a g e | 1002

Man, I'm still so proud of my Joseph Alberts Guest Writer Cerebus Column for the "Cerebus: In
My Life" column. It's one of the best pieces I've ever written, in terms of presentation and
stature. Rivaled by my Online Anime Review of Fate/Stay Night at goanimetv.com.
I'm starting to like Comixology and TFAW (Things From Another World) more than I used to.
Even though their signup sheets suck ass and are a pain in the ass to get working.
As an artist you can actually cheat at composition by making compositions seem more detailed
than they are by making 40% - 80% of the backgrounds pitch black with ink.
I've completed 50 Pages of Black-Ink Gothic-Noir, and Counting...
Speaking of noir. I realized something. Most if not all manga are very white. Their pages feel
very...white. Very pure and angelic. That's not me. That's not my style. I'm very Black, in content
and deliverance. And I don't plan to ever change that. Tons of my best artwork is
overwhelmingly Black, and not light gray black either. Thick Pitch Black, like the darkest of
night. I'm going to amp this element up to a factor of 200. Don't use up all the ink!, my Dad
says. Sorry pops, but I'm gonna kill your printer. I think I'll start buying computer ink cartridges
myself, so he won't have to worry about it. You know, I can chip in so he won't act like such a
bitch about me printing out so many black pages with heavy blacks.
My main inspiration for all that is the first Spawn animated series, and probably the second one,
whenever it gets to see the light of day. That could take eternity. How can I help?
Anime Coloring Pages, and Coloring Books filled with black ink, silhouettes, and negative
space, is the closest an artist can get to using actual genga Xeroxes.
FANMAIL
Letters Column
FAQ:
Fan Question: Can someone tell me where I can find all 50 pages of what JM was talking
about, all the "50 pages of gothic-noir" he drew? Is it available as a webcomic online?
Editor: No. Not all of them are available online yet. The future is wide open though.
Ceaseless Discussions revolving around the topic of myself. Not bad. That's actually kind of
cool. It's not always positive, but it is always, ceaselessly, about myself. Can easily make a man
self-absorbed.

P a g e | 1003

FEEL THE BURN

A fire has been lit, deep in my belly, to lose weight, study fighting, get back in shape, draw
comics, play the drums again, and speak French and Japan fluently. I will be doing all these
things and more in the coming years. Drums and Martial Arts are a rare return to form because I
used to do those all the time when I was a kid. But life caught up with me, so they were left to
rot for a while. Now I'm bringing them back to life.
I've always wanted to stay physically active on some level. I also wanna buy a copy of the Rocky
Film Soundtrack on CD. For my training Days.
The Bible
Genesis: The Prequel [an origin story]

Lord of the Rings

The Iliad and the Odyssey
The Bible
Fables
Fairy Tales

In a way, I live and write my own bible. Just as Jesus did. I'm too humble to compare myself to
Jesus on any kind of spiritual level. But there is an aspect of both our lives. The whole "He and
his life are a living story" thing, as one fan called it.
The Gospel of Joseph - According to Joseph

The Story of My life

The Story of My Birth
The Story of My Education
The Story of My Career
The Story of My Loves and Lovers
The Story of My Choices
The Story of My Passions
The Story of My Fame
The Story of My Finances
The Story of My Thought Process, Philosophy, Ideology, and Belief System

P a g e | 1004

The Story of My Success

The Story of the People In My Life
The Story of My Family
The Story of My Enemies
The Story of My Culture and Society
The Story of My World Happening Around Me
The Story of My Trials and Tribulations
The Story of My Reputation
The Story of My Travels
The Story of My Punishment and Suffering

"The intention of mans heart is evil from his youth."

-The Lord, Genesis 8:21

"And the LORD said, Behold, they are one people, and they have all one language, and this is
only the beginning of what they will do. And nothing that they propose to do will now be
impossible for them. Come, and let us go down and there confuse their language, so that they
may not understand one anothers speech.
-Genesis 11:6,7

John Steinbeck guide to writing novels:

Description of nature and things needs colors. Varieties and diversities of colors. And lots of
them, so that you feel like you reading the most vibrant description in the world. Nothing hardly
sets a mood like color, other than props, costumes, people, events, and descriptions of people and
things. And each color has At Least three varieties, if not almost a dozen for each color, what
with shades and various qualities and textures and patterns, like cloud formations, or the air in
the sky, or the ground, or nature, or elemental phenomena.

Topics waiting to be written about by me...:

Area 51
The Bermuda Triangle

P a g e | 1005

Israel
Germany in the 1930s and 1940s
The French Revolution
The Napoleonic Wars
The Sicilian Mafia
Aliens
Family
The FBI
The Aztecs
Egypt
Arab Spring
Barack Obama
Rome
Italy
Soldiers

Topics waiting to be written about by me...:

Detective Stories
Dark Lords
Counts
Jesus and the Bible
War
Church and State
Therapists
Drafting Tables (Howard Roark)
Travel
The Supernatural
The Illuminati
The Cold War
Roads, Highways, Expressways
Driving
Driving Cross-Country
The Titanic
Writing
Writers
Artists
Cartoonists
Mystery, Mysteries
Suspense
Drama
Action
History

P a g e | 1006

Sunday, May 26th, 2014

It's Asian Heritage Month. That's every 5 month, or May of each year. I think this is the second
annual one if I'm not mistaken.
I am a storytelling. A story listener. A story character. A story experiential witness. And a story
reader.
I love reading, writing, hearing, seeing, drawing, designing, and illustrating stories. Both the
ones I write and draw, and the ones other people tell, write, and make with art or visuals.
The writing on most of adult swim's non-original series sucks. And the only shows with good
writing are the Dave Willis Shows and Aaron McGruder shows. And the only other good writer
there is Hammid, who writes the bumps for the most part. And maybe Sean Akins and Jason
Demarco. And Brendon Small. Anything that's not Dave Willis, Aaron McGruder, Mike Judge,
Sean Akins, Hammid, and Jason Demarco and maybe Seth Green and Tom Root that isn't an
anime, is HORRIBLY written. I write better scripts in my sleep. Especially compared to Seth
MacFarlane. He's so envious of my literary abilities in every episode with his staff of other
horrible writers it's not even funny.
Disney still hires good writers on such shows as Tron: Uprising, Motorcity, Slug Terra, Kick
Buttowki, and Randy Cunningham. Everything else on there is mostly trash.
Don't get me started on Nickelodeon. What's to discuss. NONE of Nickelodeon's American
shows are all that well written. They're traditionalists, not progressives, which is exactly why
their scripts suck.
French, Chinese, and Japanese screenwriters continue to impress me.
In a way, I'm the spiritual screenwriting successor to:
Yoshiyuki Tomino, Aaron McGruder, Dai Sato, Michael Reaves, and Savin Yeatman-Eiffell. My
work has the same emotional seriousness about it. I'm kind of proud of that. It's hard to
discourage. If someone criticizes it I feel a bit too smart to actually bother to listen, and have
been known to switch over to whatever the hell else is on if they want to throw bricks from their
fishbowl glass house and cross the line like that.

P a g e | 1007

New Goals:

Work on a Comic Book Series (Monthly, Bi-Monthly)

Write and Finish One or More Pilot Scripts, Successors to Druidon
Draw a Thick Graphic Novel with a lot of Foreshortening, Composition, and Black Panel
BGs
Write a Genre-Bending Novel, or Series of Short Story Fictions
Work on The Parallax Notes
Write New-Earth Historia Book
Draw Warriors Illustration Book
Talk to Matt Cicero
Take Japanese, Shaolin Kung-Fu, and Comics Drawing Lessons From Tom Hart
Finish Work on App with Richard Hong
Manage ActionToonTV
Tweet
Blog Columns
Keep Collecting French Covers
DON'T Work on a TV Show, Video Game, or Movie, unless it's script writing and
development

I don't write fiction. I write stories that are 50% allegory based on my life, 50% random outlines
and narrative of random events. Sometimes meaningful. Not always. If I don't start working on
overcoming my fiction writing and Novelistic, and screenwriting procrastination, it will never
happen. I have to start now. Today. All the time. Every day, for the rest of my life. I'll find a way
to overcome my fiction writer procrastination, fatigue, and dyslexia.
Me and Nicole are such a mess power couple. Our forbidden love ruined both our lives, yet at the
same time, it saved us. At this point I don't know if we'll ever officially be married, but I'm pretty
sure she still thinks of me and I still think of her, and by now everyone else knows it who's in the
know. We're older now. Kind of a little old for school, but we're the same age. Pretty much. I'm
30 and she's 31. I'm a Scorpio. She's a Gemini. I rock the afro. She rocks the goth, emo, and dyed
hair pixie cut. Our relationship isn't a secret anymore. The only other women I ever thought of
pursuing during all this time we've been on different sides of the country, was Danielle.

P a g e | 1008

P a g e | 1009

Chapter 11

P a g e | 1010

Monday, May 26th, 2014, 4:41 am,

Some day, my friends and family will be approached by members of the media when they do a
documentary about the success story of my life when I get rich off of my work. School mates,
friends, girlfriends, teachers, parents, siblings, cousins, uncles, aunts, biological and adoptive
family, industry peers and professionals, historians, chroniclers, reporters, retailers, editors,
producers, writers, artists, filmmakers, animators, musicians, actors, international celebrities,
authors, self-publishers, tech buffs, Silicon Valley types. Anyone and everyone. Anyone relevant
to my story. That would be my guess.
I think 8 entire books with AWOL Covers is more than enough books to go without a cover. I
need to start hiring people to design covers for me, or choose some pre-made covers, back
covers, and interior flaps, and maybe an intro page in gray, black, and white, or black and white,
like Elric books.

Tuesday, May 27th, 2014,

The Story of an Inanimate Object: "The Bridge". "The Tree". "The Cathedral". "Talisman".
"Necklace". "The House". "Castle". "College Campus". "Shoes". Etc.
Every inanimate object has a story, not just places, times, events, history, and people. Anything
and Everything can be made into a story and has a story to tell. If you think there's nothing to
write about, you're not looking around you hard enough.
Writing fiction every day, in short-to-long, intimate to epic, epistolary third to first person bursts.
Tell little stories, and big stories, and intertwine the two into an even longer narrative as much as
possible.
I'm really, really good at doing business and in my element when I have OPM (other people's
money) as a resource.

Saturday, May 31st, 2014, 1:44 pm,

Finally. It finally happened, and both at the same time. Within one week, the same span of time,
I've somehow managed to get into a consistent work routine churning out not only new fiction
pages (END TIMES: GENESIS), but I've also somehow managed to begin work on my first ever
comic book script warm-up pages (500 Deaths of Bob Johnston; Lock & Load; Brushfire).
Brushfire was influenced by the script from the first group of pages from Tezuka Osamu's
Buddha: Volume 1. The scene in Buddha where we're introduced to the legend of the Buddha
and the history of Asia, while we see beautiful wide shots of mountains continuously. I thought
to myself, "Wow, you can really actually do that in a comic book?? It's 'allowed?? Nice!" So I'm

P a g e | 1011

going to be emulating and replicating that narrative techniques in my own sequential art narrative
fiction. Just showing a whole lot of nothing happening as we hear history and narration, and
whatnot. Scenic and historical or contextual details unrelated to the main narrative of the
characters and action.
I still can't believe I have the opportunity to openly communicate with ABe Yoshitoshi. He's a
legend in the industry. Why he has any interest in me, an underdog who struggles as much as I
do with my art, I'm uncertain why he chose me of all people. But he did. "We are all connected".
That's a very good Lain quote. I can sense there is some element he possesses that supports me
and what I do, regardless of whether my emails draw any responses. I can't believe how lucky I
am, that he gifted me with his email to begin with. I get a vibe from him that says he's an
innovative enough doujin and manga-ka and anime auteur creator that he's open to input from the
western world in a way that is unprecedented in Japan or the united states. However, even if he
doesn't respond to email, he'll always be there for me on Twitter, so that's really awesome.
I haven't been this excited to talk to an international celebrity since either the time I spoke to
Thomas Romain or the time I spoke to David Lucas (both conversations being through email).
Sometimes it's difficult NOT to be a fan.
That does tend to happen to me. I tend to go on and on in these private journals about how I'm so
excited I actually got any response from so-and-so, and before I know it I've lost sight of the real
mission: The work. Having celebrity friends like Otomo and ABe is cool and all, but the more
involved I get with my industry connections, the less focus will remain for the projects I'm
working on. I know I get incredibly lonely and bored sometimes, especially on weekends and
mid days, but you must never lose sight of your goals. In my case it's my work. The art and
writing.
Speaking of ABe. Yoshitoshi ABe is one of the 2 most powerful self-publishing (Doujinshi)
artists in Japan. This side of female troupe CLAMP.
But doujinshi, is semantics. One could argue for weeks over nothing more than how to define
what the word "doujinshi" really means and represents.
Well, I've done everything I can do. I've gone as far as I can go for this particular moment (and
generation). I'm hitting a brick wall. I feel like I've innovated and pioneered enough.
I've written and or produced a screenplay, a TV Animated Series Pilot Script, Comic Book
Scripts, Numerous Comic Book Issues, a Novella, and a production-memoir documenting the
details of my process. That and I made YouTube and Twitter happen. Not really much TO DO,
but sit around and wait for the world to catch up with my crazy dark science-fantasy cartoonliterary vision of graphic novels and international animation. That and the online video thing. I
think I'll keep growing my beard out and refining my talents, always seeking to add more pages

P a g e | 1012

to my comics, scripts, and novels. It could take anywhere from until the beginning of 2015, to
the beginning of 2025 to take effect.
My name with the names of the books I've written return a total of 20 non-incognito Solid
Google Search Results.

Sunday, June 1st, 2014, 2:24 pm,

Progress is being made. I finished a whopping 5 story-based comics thumb layouts. I've found I
can get more work done if I just keep initial pay drafts incredibly simple and primitive. Make the
artwork suck on purpose so I can get a layout down, and get a sense of the composition and story
on each page, as it progresses. Now I have 9 pages of storyboard layouts if I include the amount
that's already gone out there. Even Otomo does roughs. Every pro artist does. Rough thumb
layouts keep the action going, and are one more piece of the bridge to get built.
It's also important as a comic cartoonist, to work directly from scripts I write, and/or stories,
scenes, and outlines. Anything End Times or Parallax related that pours out of my printer and
word processor.

Monday, June 2nd, 2014, 7:20 a.m.,

The history of modern design, screenwriting, action, and science-fiction fantasy is being written.
By me.

zumbl.com Cool site. Nice for chatting with and Instant Messaging people all day.
ActionToonTV.com is down. I need to pay my bills, but am out of money
I finished beta testing Stream Garage and writing it's marketing copy
Drawing comics page thumb layouts in stealth mode, where I make all the visuals either
labeled or super simple
Screenwriting and novelization. I'm working on it.

P a g e | 1013

Tuesday, June 3rd, 2014, 9:32 p.m.,

Building An App Empire
Okay. I finished beta testing my app with my programmer assistant, Richard Hong. We
collaborated primarily through oDesk, and later, Gmail and Yahoo YIM. It took 2 weeks
near the end of May and beginning of June, but it's finally done, and published on
Google Play's Apps Store. Now I can promote it and turn it into a tech business.
This is my second finished app invention software since I worked on ActionToonTV for
Appy Pie and Google Play, and my website, http://www.actiontoontv.com, a URL I need to
make a payment on and renew currently.
I've realize I have a talent for making money from tech apps and websites. True, I've
made a small amount of money from comics and artbooks. A VERY small amount of money
from that.
But the real money, especially for me, is in online video, apps, and streaming video
apps. With my transient YouTube Adsense Partners Account, I made over $170. I made $6
from Amazon Kindle. And there's a high likelihood apps will be profitable too, once
everything is set up and I promote it enough through my social media accounts (Google
Play Apps Worldwide, Blogger, Google+, Google, Twitter, & Adwords), with a little help
from Admob. My budget for building my post-Appy-Pie App was around $500 or so, and now
I have $30+ once again for marketing, which could get some decent results for Stream
Garage.
I'm not under a lot of pressure this time around for the most part, other than being
short on money temporarily.
I wonder what my next group of apps will be...I'll have to discuss it with Mr. Hong.
Odesk is amazing for hiring in the same way zumbl.com is amazing for meeting new
people and chatting.

Wednesday, June 4th, 2014, 11:09 p.m.,

My former protege, Lindsey, can kind of be dumb sometimes, like how she's actually pretty good
at art, but HORRIBLE at politics. Her political ideas are so dumb. It's almost like she views
manga as nothing more than a stepping stone to political power. WRONG! That's a very clueless
way to think. But even if that were the case, that one could attain political power through art,
she's going about it in all the wrong ways. Like second guessing herself, overestimating her own
abilities, and not bothering to show up to present or do the work to begin with. If she really cared
that much about her "career in manga" you'd think she'd know better than to dodge my emails
and trade up for people who may be talented, but are not at all loyal to teaching her what they
know. For some reason she feels she has nothing left to learn from me, so she avoids me now.

P a g e | 1014

Thursday, June 5th, 2014, 11:45 p.m.,

Eventually I'll probably be entirely legit. Not too hard if you have enough money. And I have no
vindictive vendetta against piracy as some people in big business and media do out of fear
internet businesses will put them out of business, while stealing all their business at the same
time. Piracy will probably never go away. It's the market's responsibility to make a business
model out of it that makes everyone happy, not destroy it, that's impossible, quite frankly. But
there's an easy way to learn that lesson, and a hard way, and people who go the latter route are
doomed to failure. Easy is embracing the pirates and not worrying about copyright, sympathizing
with the online industry and the fans, even if they can be a little messed up, cruel, cyberbully-ish,
and bizarro every so often. They have just as much stake in conducting themselves responsibly
as corporations do, if they don't want to end up in jail, as that can be a dangerous place to be on
the wrong day.
By legit, I mean I'll acquire content libraries with money just like how Ted Turner founded
Cartoon Network with the Hannah Barbera library right around the time they did that ultra merge
with Warner Brothers, and somehow pulled it off by surviving it all. I don't know if something
that massive in scale would be as successful with the internet era, unless the internet was kept in
mind.

Friday, June 6th, 2014, 6:24 a.m.,

On Flappy Bird: No two ways about it. Flappy Bird was the app that inspired a generation to
make apps. Including myself in that generation. I wanted to do for mobile video what Flappy
Birds has done for mobile gaming. I remember getting very excited when I found out how much
Flappy Bird's creator was making per day in in-app advertising: A salary of $50,000 per day.
And then I read an article that the mobile industry is worth a total $4 Trillion worldwide. And
then Facebook shelled out $19 Billion for one app business, Snapchat, a communications app.
This is an obscene amount of wealth we are talking about being generated here. From that
moment on, I wanted to make apps for a living, and realized apps held amazing financial
opportunity currently, and I figured since I've always wanted to be a speculative software
developer, after someone recommended to me over the phone I should try apps instead of
traditional software because they're the "in-thing" now and a new, growing industry, that's
exactly what I did. I published version 1.0 of my first 2 apps (ActionToon Mobile I and II) on
my own, through Android using Appy Pie and Google Play as the hosts. But I had yet to master
Admob, as there were problems capitalizing on my first two apps, ActionToonTV Mobile
Releases 1 & 2. I stand much better chance of making money in round two, Stream Garage
Video Playlist 1.0 - 3.0.

P a g e | 1015

All the following apply to training in the comic book narrative arts.

Planning
Strategy
Organization
Outline
Preliminary Thumbnail Layouts (Panels, Pages)
Blueline pencil, black ink pen
Scanner
Magic Wand Highlight Feature (Digital Art)
Black ink autofill (black "negative space-fill button")
Accuracy (proportion and correctness)
Precision (precise and exact results)
Training
Repeatability
Improvement
Training
Harnessed Power
Harnessed Strength
Harnessed Concentration and Focus
Harnessed Energy
Patience
Tolerance for Discomfort
Music
Proportion Grid Paper
Layout Template Menus

For the first decade of the 2000s, I had art muscle to spare. I had literary, design, and artistic
power to spare. And yet for almost a decade and a half, from 2000 - 2012, until around 2012 2014, none of that power was focused on anything for more than 5-10 minutes. It was a chaotic
freeform mess of improvisational creativity on the page and scren. Now, in 2014 especially, I'm
finally learning how to harness my power more accurately and precisely, what with scripts,
outlines, extensive notations, and thumbnail layouts. I'm finally starting to get my act together
and actual hit the bullseye, instead of just tossing paint or ink at wall and hoping it sticks, with
no direction or harnessed energy in my work routines.

P a g e | 1016

Controlled Energy and Power

Discipline
Honor,
Focus
Planning
Patience
Confidence
Proactive Action
Habits
Willpower

All important traits to have.

The key words here are power & control. Controlling your power and energy, and henceforth
possessing power over your power. To harness power and energy is to control and direct it.
Planning and strategy and hard work conduct talent, creative power, and energy, in a fashion
similar to how metal and wiring conducts electricity and electromagnetic energy. Creative power
can be controlled. But it takes notation, habitual practice, training, repetition, and planning.
By the time I'm 50 I hope I win a whole lot of awards in the scientific and creative arts.
One art I've mastered, is the art of notation. Note Taking & Notation is an art form.
So in an effort to promote my artwork, through social media, I am creating a
few extra social media accounts. Most notably with oDesk, Tumblr, Flickr,
Pixiv, and Picasa. I already have had accounts with Kindle, Webcomics Nation,
Graphicly, Lulu, Twitter, Google+, YouTube, and Blogger for a while.

Monday, June 9th, 2014, 9:53 p.m.,

A Million Ways to Make a Fool out of Yourself. Why not just call it that?
What an emotional tourist that guy is. But forget him. He's an attention whore, and he'll never be
happy as long as he is one, seeing as it already seems pretty obvious 100s of millions of dollars
isn't enough to make him relax or be happy with himself and his life, which is incredibly
pathetic. A professional fool, obviously. Glad I never became that.
Anyway, Currently I have an audience of 5 million people through Advertising so far. That's
bigger than the size of many television audiences. But hey, it's the internet, I doubt it should have
ever been THAT much of a surprise I'm doing incredibly well for myself, which I am. Fools still
act like fools, but that's not at all surprising. Circus Clones, etc. But the circus clone usage tactic
has apparently worn itself thin and out as I don't see competitors using that tactic a million times

P a g e | 1017

repeatedly, nonstop like they did previously. I had my 5 years of fame. Gee. That was fun. Oof.
So painful. Can you smell the sarcasm?
Anyway, back on topic. I think I finally figured my advertising and marketing platform out. Just
like Google figured its payment platform out and became billionaires.
Unfortunately, due to how dangerously literal (and stupidly so I might addd) some media people
are, the days of me just blurting out whatever crosses my auto-consciousness are over. I've said
enough. I don't care how much demand there is for idle chatter, if I don't know the person, I will
not write an instant response. I need to take my time with responding to questions, insults,
inquires, and alerts, or at least more than I used to. I'm starting to realize what an impact my
words have. Like it or not, JOKING AROUND or not, some very influential people take nearly
every word that leaves my mouth more seriously than they ever should have half the time. It
doesn't matter how much circus clowns try to put words in my mouth. Let them. They're not
fooling anybody, and I have no control over how they fuck up their lives, like it or not, it's
beyond my power to do anything about the people on TV and online who want to second guess
me with circus clones and putting words and ideas in my mouth that are never, and were never
really there. Most of it is made up and pulled out of their asses anyway. Time to stop responding
to every single little thing that crosses my path. I'm an important man now, an important key
historical figure. Shouldn't I at least give my SELF the respect to act like one, and not foolishly
engage the foolish, the fools of America? Family included. If they're looking for "instant
answers" they won't be getting any more from me. I'm a wall.
Upon watching the screenwriting episode of Family Guy, the one where Brian and Stewie
write plays. Because the episode was actually pretty well written and respectful, and
got to the heart of the matter, which is the opposite of what I thought it would do, I
think I'll give my two cents, purely because they were nice about my screenwriting
career. So here's what I think:
Seth is not a bad guy. And he's productive and successful. Is he as respected as a
writer as me? Probably not in people's eyes, but in some ways I enjoy what he does as
a different way of doing things in the same way he enjoys what I do as a different way
of doing things. He writes primarily if not all comedy, which is not something I tend
to write, other than some hilarious tweets every once in a while (Twitter and maybe my
blog are some of the only places you'll see me writing as a humorist, and that's only
some of the time). If nothing else, this little episode made me realize that even
though I never heard back from those agencies, I still need to submit my work to
places who do TV and animation, to studios and producers, and editors and small new
agencies, perhaps not the big ones. Someone is bound to say yes eventually. So his
occasional words of encouragement have not gone unheard. I guess it kind of upset me
to see how screwed up his priorities seem sometimes. I think if he spent half of as
much of his time on his writing and making his huge payouts in Hollywood actually mean
something other than having too much confidence at times, and put in half as much
effort into perfecting his craft in private (writing and putting out work HE'S happy
with himself, not what he thinks his audience hopes to see) as he already puts into
keeping up with the joeses (get it? lol), then I think that would be good, to say the
least. If he's reading this or gets wind of it, maybe he'll consider it. Also, if he
really wants to be a writer, why doesn't he release something that isn't just pictures

P a g e | 1018
like animation and film? If he wants to be a writer, people need to see his literary
page compositions, not just dialogue spoken aloud on a TV and movie screen. I know
it's not easy to do that easy. But to me, writing must first and foremost be: A)
Printed words., B) A printed page of words (letters, punctuation, words, sentences,
paragraphs, chapters. How does he expect anyone to know how good of a writer he is if
we never see him print up anything?
P.S. Seth,
I am planning on purchasing a copy of your novel and reading it, in the same way the
public is downloading kindle copies of my book and browsing it. But I plan of buying
the print copy of A Million Ways to Die in the West. It looks like a light, fun read.
Not John Steinbeck or HP Lovecraft or Michael Moorcock, but still actually quite good,
if the only excerpt is any indicator.
Looking forward to it.
- Joseph MA

Sexual assault incident in Cairo Square, Egypt.

I kickstarted the Arab Spring.....For THIS???
C'mon guys. Grow up. You're not 12.

In other news circles, Reed Hastings, founder and current CEO of Netflix, is now a Billionaire.
He's now worth over a billion dollars..Good for him! That's probably a good sign for me. I doubt
I'll become a billionaire, even if I did pioneer the online video and digital video Uploading
industries.

Tuesday, June 10th, 2014, 5:49 p.m.,

I'm pretty actively involved in both social media and content delivery and distribution online.
I have accounts at the following sites:

Google
Google+
YouTube
Ustream
Picasa
Tumblr

P a g e | 1019

Twitter
Pixiv
Blogger
Webs.com
Google Play Developers
oDesk
Amazon Kindle
CreateSpace
Lulu
Webcomics Nation

I am a Founder, CEO, and business owner. I don't believe it's possible to earn $10 million in
profits by the age of 30 for most Founders and CEOs. 40 years? Maybe. 50 years? Definitely. 6080 years?? Absolutely! 30 is highly unlikely. Just because Mark Zuckerberg makes it look easy
to accomplish such a thing doesn't mean it's a reality for most. It's NOT a reality to get rich that
early for most. It takes decades of struggle. And decades upon those decades.

Note to self:
Pre-Planning Left for Issue 1 of END TIMES:

Adapt Druidon into a comic book script, panel by panel and scene by scene.
Panel Sizing

Thursday, June 12th, 2014, 3:30 p.m.,

New "Lesson Plan" I'm writing:
"How to adapt a raw animation script into a raw comic book script"
Before you can teach it to OTHERS you have to teach it to yourself.
Got a bunch of outlines for END TIMES written. I'm happy with it. Very happy. No one really
writes scripts like I do, and I am proud I'm the only one doing the kind of writing I do. Got a lot
of hours of drawing out scenes leftover for later daytime sessions though.
The key is knowing whether the narrative will be long or short, or a mixture of both. Comics
making involves space and time. Comics scenes can take a few panels, or dozens, if not
hundreds. In the words of Scott McCloud, "Comics is as additive an art as it is subtractive".

P a g e | 1020

In one instance, after approaching the animation-to-comics script adaptation, I found one
sequence that took 3 pages of animation script to write ended up taking 10 pages of comics
layouts to convey the same general information, even though those 10 pages of thumbnails
revealed less about the details of the plot than the 3 TV script pages did. Funny how that works
out.

Friday the 13th, June, 2014, 11:01 a.m.,

So I did the math. 1 Scene in my animation script equates to around 10 pages of comic book
layouts on average. Meaning individual monthly issues are out of the question. 1
Episode......Each Episode = 1 Book or Graphic Novel Trade Paperback. Each Episode is long
enough to be a mini comic book novel. Around 40 - 100 pages each or so.
The production of my new app, Stream Garage, for its assembly and much of its non speculative
production process was a application software production job I outsourced to Asia. China and
Singapore. I give final approval and design the Google Play Storefront and test out the final
download.
Turns out, I'm luckier than I thought. My theories surrounding the year and time of my death, my
own death prophecy has shifted in light of some new information about the death of my father in
particular. I learned just this year he was born in 1923, and died a long time after that, close to a
century or 100 years, in the year 1998. That changes everything. He didn't die at the age of 55!
He died at the age of 75! He lived to be a senior citizen. I hope I get to live that long. If I live to
be as old as my birth father did (75), that would mean I'll get to live until the ripe old age of 75,
in the year 2058. This is a far cry from my original life expectance prophecy, where I was certain
I would die at 55, in the year 2038. A lot can happen in those 20 extra years. a whole EXTRA
LOT. Thank you, Lord God. For restoring my life expectancy with newfound knowledge. That's
20 whole extra years to bust out of Florida, see the world, get my own creative projects, and
meet lots of new people and live life.
Still. 1923. That's VERY old. That's one of the oldest prestige multiracial power couples in the
history of the world. The Roaring 20s, in Kentucky.
My birth father was born before the following events took place:

Gandhi's Salt March

Pluto was discovered
Stalin died
Hitler died
World War II started
The Vietnam War

P a g e | 1021

The Moon Landing

The United States Civil Rights Movement
Hollywood came to power
The Internet was invented
PCs were invented
Air Conditioning was Invented
The first TV was invented
Anime was popular
Manga was popular
Tons of famous people were born
Cable TV
Google
The Kennedy Assassination
9-11
Bill Clinton took office
Barack Obama took office
Stephen King was born
Spielberg was born
George Lucas was born
Osamu Tezuka was born (but barely)
The Vietnam War
Woodstock
The Great Depression
Ted Turner and Bill Gates were born
Oprah Winfrey was born
Hillary Clinton was born

Wow. That's a lotta stuff you didn't anticipate happening. That's a lotta stuff almost nobody
anticipated happening!
But seriously, now I can afford to take my time with things, knowing how old I'll probably live
to be. With 22 potentially additional years added to my lifespan, I don't have to rush into my life.
I'll have enough time to achieve all of my major goals, like books, comics, and animation from
all parts of the world. And getting rich and established.

Saturday, June 14th, 2014, 6:56 p.m.,

Woo hoo! I'm in business. My assistant and employee in China is letting me host his apps
through my Google Play dashboard. He's actually planning on providing me the good fortune of

P a g e | 1022

profit sharing for each of his apps. I'm excited about it, because this definitely is starting to seem
like one of the easiest money making opportunities I can think of. His name is Daike.
But the key to success is figuring out responsibility roles in this little operation. He's going to
build and publish the apps, and we'll probably both help out with Adwords and marketing. I
created and will be hosting the account (spindack10), under his company name.
So my co-worker, assistant, and new employee, Daike, would like to get my help with building
his own brand of apps. He wanted to know if he could build his own apps on one of my Google
accounts, so I obliged. And now that he has his own multiple app platform, by some miracle he's
granted me a cut of the profits from his apps. So that's easy money. I think he wants me to help
consult him with his app publishing and distribution, and I recommended he market his app with
adwords, even going so far as to offer him a free pre-activated Adwords account on one of my
secondary gmail-based accounts (actiontoontv83@gmail.com). He's interested in publishing
gaming apps. I sense the beginning of a beautiful business relationship. He's my second ever
Asian client from the Far East. Mr. Hong lives in Singapore. Daike, Mr. Richard's assistant lives
in China, and wants my help due to the fact that Chinese accounts on Google Play are blocked by
Google due to Google's rivalry with China. But I'm pioneering a way around that. Google kind of
didn't help me out with YouTube, so I'm repaying the favor by ignoring their anti-Chinese
policy. Turnabout is fair play. I'm happy to employ someone living in China. That's part of my
heritage, and now that some people know about that element of my genetics and life, that I'm
part Chinese, things might go differently. Maybe I can turn my genetic and cultural heritage
diversity to my advantage. I already seem to be starting to.

Sunday, 15th, 2014, 5:35 p.m.,

Building apps for a living. I'm surprised that's working out as well as it is for me. If I'm working
with Daike, I could make anywhere from a few pennies to a few million. It all depends on how
much he promotes his own app and how many people download his apps and use them. It all
depends on what his initial marketing budget is. Marketing apps is almost as important as
publishing and developing them.
So there are two developers I'm working with. Richard Hong of Singapore, and Daike of China.
They are mad efficient and precise. Looks like I've finally found some tech allies. We get along
well, and make a Formidable App Development Team. Me and Daike are working in direct
defiance of Google's anti-Chinese "policy" to deny service to Chinese users.
I'll be putting some of my own projects aside temporarily to devote more time to helping Daike
with getting his apps published and running across adwords, google play, and admob, just like
with what I did for my own apps.

P a g e | 1023

Tuesday, June 17th, 2014, 12:16 a.m.,

Well, I failed as a cartoonist. Well, not in terms of design or creativity, just in terms of
popularity, profits, and sales. With rare exceptions like my Kindle account. Wait. Actually my
Kindle account never really failed entirely. I generally raised awareness of my career and sold a
small sum of copies through Amazon internationally. But in my mind I'm still a failure.
So it's time to try something a bit more new and now. Fortunately, I'm really good at making and
promoting apps and online videos of animation. That's not so much failure as it is pretty decent
business I'm already starting to see profits from. Paying my employees and app programmers
through services like oDesk and Paypal can get expensive, but it's worth every penny. And I'm
finally starting to have access to advertising revenues, just like what Flappy Birds got to do.
I hope Daike's apps actually do well. Of course, why not. I do have stake in his company and
profits, which will probably be sharing if he makes money. We haven't agreed on a percentage
yet. I've agreed to let him have 30% of my profits with stream garage in case it retains a profit,
and I make that money back by reciprocal profits his app could generate. If we succeed we'll be
doing pretty well for ourselves. And if there were ever an industry that had the potential for high
profit returns, it would be the iOS, App, and Android, Google Play, and iTunes market. People
have gotten to watch me struggle for a long time now. I wonder if people are going to get to see
me succeed now. Would be nice.
So good for me. I'm a successful and potentially profitable first generation App pioneer and
appreneur. One of my biggest markets is the Middle East. But my biggest markets are North
America, Europe, and Asia. I enjoy the challenge and potential profit of branding my and
collaborators' apps.
So my programmer, Daike, kind of got me interested in Sports other than the martial arts.
International Football, or Soccer, more specifically.
I've recently started watching the FIFA World Cup series 2014 on international sports TV.
The American win at FIFA has spawned some backlash in Brazil with certain Brazilians burning
American flags and whatnot, purely because the American team is winning. So awesome ha!
Hate on USA Team-haters.
Reasons why I'm procrastinating on my comic book project:

Backlash caused by popularity. I don't like the feeling of envy from others.
Others are trying to discourage me from working
Too much indirect publicity
Drawing is hard

P a g e | 1024

Drawing comics is even harder

There might end up being no company that publishes it
All my pre-existing comics pages have already been seen online and in print
1,001 rip offs and knock offs.
No financial or emotional incentive involved
A lot of people will criticize my comics work regardless of how good or bad it is.
Qualitative assessment goes out the window
There's already a lot of competitors who have already succeeded at it, and with less effort
and trouble than I have
Exploitative Los Angeles
I lack the work ethic and focus to get a lot done at once for comics
It feels way too much like a competitive sport, and not enough like an art
The pressure and expectations from the outside world are too sky high and not realistic in
their expectations
Spies and hackers
Pre-existing public stature
Too many competitors (millions), too much competition
Parents aren't supportive anymore
Too many distractions

I have a million reasons NOT TO WORK on END TIMES.

It won't be the end of the world if End Times never see completion. I'm sure Hollywood will
come crawling trying to rob my grave of my own projects after I die anyway. And I'm sure it will
suck like every time Hollywood tries to exploit a dead man.
Honestly, I'm really just tired of colleagues and the media treating me as a circus performer, and
referring to me as such.
So unless I will ever feel like drawing for myself again, I'm quitting End Times, especially
seeing as lately it doesn't even feel like any work I do on it is just for myself anymore. Bad
things happen when you draw merely to appease the public but not yourself. They attempt to
duplicate your presence on television and act like that fraudulent copy of a presence "is as
important as the genuine article". I wonder if anyone is stupid and gullible enough to believe lies
and deceit of that caliber.
At least if I'm helping to build apps for clients, it feels justified. It doesn't feel justified if I'm
drawing for someone else. The Tech, Science, Science-Fantasy community never really gives me
the cold resistance the way the art, anime, manga, and traditional media and L.A. TV-Film
community tend to. If you don't get support from anyone other than yourself in any one
particular field, you may as well retire from that field.

P a g e | 1025

Finally solved a serious problem of mine. Turns out the way I layout my comic book pages with
thumbs and prelims should be closer to the method I use to outline and write my pilot scripts
than I initially thought. Meaning not in numerical seqential order. I don't need to draw
sequentially from pages 1 - 40 and higher after all. I can skip around as much as I want, and I
don't have to draw the pages in the same order people read them in. Thank God. Makes things a
lot easier on me as the comic book designer and storyteller. If it worked for the script, which it
did, it can work for the art panels and pages, too.

Wednesday, June 18th, 2014, Noon,

Honestly, in terms of how my comic book stories are developing formatically and lengthwise,
I'm kind just letting the world expand itself, and just growing everything outward, organically.
The length needs to determine the format, not the other way around. Whether or not a 20-70 page
story will be a hardcover or softcover, or trade paperback, or graphic novel, or one shot, it can be
hard to know anything about the publishing format ahead of time, without accidentally
convoluting the story and the visuals of each page in the process. This includes printing format,
page count, and the visual consistency of the world. Background and Production design, panel
sizing and whatnot. It's best not to plan those elements out before all the thumbnails are put
down on paper, with the exception of maybe BG and Production Design.

Friday, June 20th, 2014, Midnight,

Divination and Chinese Prophecy are two literary themes I'd like to explore in future stories.
Maybe tell the story of the life of either an ancient and/or modern Chinese Prophet who practices
Divination, and seeing the events and destinies of The Future.
I decided I need to keep working on my discipline as a writer, screenwriter, and novelist. To help
in this goal there's not a time I don't have a small silk pouch full of miniature Tiger Eye
gemstones in my pocket. I keep it with me and in my pocket at nearly all hours of the day and
night, in an effort to discipline myself as a writer and artists, and in an effort to use that
discipline to work harder over time and increase my tolerance for hard work.
Where I publish my polished PDF Manuscript Documents to:

Scribd
Amazon CreateSpace
Amazon Kindle
Lulu

P a g e | 1026

So I signed up with Scribd. My manuscripts got a collective 80 reads. I've published comics,
novellas, essays, journals, a tweet anthology, a blog anthology, and my artbook online, over at
Scribd. I figured it might be a good way to get mainstream literary exposure for my written and
printed works. A new day, a new social media site to conquer.
Okay, so I don't want the power of social influence over the course of Humanity, or my own
anime or cartoon series on TV anymore. I'd rather do film and comics, and maybe write TV spec
scripts for my pleasure and amusement.

Saturday, June 21st, 2014, 1:49 p.m.,

Well, thanks to Daiske's involvement in my App Development Company, StreamWAVE
Developers, and Daike's hard work and excellent production skills as a mobile gaming
developer, I can now add a few more titles to my resume:

Video Game Producer

Video Game Co-Producer
Mobile Video Game Publisher
Executive Producer (Video Game)

I'm the Co-Producer of AfterDinner, which is Daike's debut as a mobile video game developer.
He's actually letting me help him distribute it internationally. His game is very fun. I got to test it
out and play it. It's a simple, cute thing, like a mixture of Flappy Birds and Tom & Jerry. I
understand what he is going for.
I never guessed I'd one day be working in the gaming industry and mobile gaming industry. But
now that I'm here...Feels great!!
Nintendo, Sony, Tetris, Flappy Bird. Now I get to participate: StreamWAVE, AfterDinner.
More coming soon.
I'm the publisher, co-producer, and executive producer of the AfterDinner mobile game.
No small feat. Just when I had all but given up on my dream of getting to be an exec producer.
So technically, I'm in a job position with my company that's the position of a power player.
Relatively speaking of course. And that is Executive Producer
"Never let anyone tell you that you don't have power"
-Better World Handbook

P a g e | 1027

My spiritual drawing energy and power now seems to have taken on a life of its own. Everytime
I sit down to draw, even just a little sketch that's only so-so, I can sense the energy and power
being generated around me. It's not easy to control, and everyone around me, and many people
far away can feel that energy. With the combined energy of that and Toonami, forget about it.
I'm obviously not getting much work done at that timeslot. I'm too overpowered by my own
energy and power. Power-Vibes. Energy-Vibes. If there's too much of it, it can become difficult
to sustain work through concentration. I'm only recently becoming aware of this level of energy
surrounding me.
I influence Japanese, Chinese, and Korean pop art in comics and animation. But that does not
make me an Asian Artist. I'm too humble to call myself that. I'm an American Artist. I'm
reverting back into an American Artist's mentality. Artists such as Todd McFarlane, Frank
Frazetta, Joe Mad, Jim Lee, Jhonen Vasquez, Jeff Smith, Walt Disney, Paul Pope, and (although
they are french) Moebius and Enki Bilal.
The only artists I respect or admire currently are American artists. Artists who actually bother to
explain their method or process, and not just cloak themselves in their work as the Eastern
Asians do. I seek answers, and American designers, illustrators, authors, and cartoonists are in
the best place to give you those answers. I would say Asians have the best process, but that
would be a lie, as most Asians are not around to explain their process and are pressured by their
culture to remain stone silent.

I'm starting a savings account. Money I can put in, but won't let myself take out, for the next 10
to 20 years. I'll be starting off by paying the front fee of $25 to open the account.
My parents will be able to put as much money left over from their expenses into the account, and
I will forward money to them of my own finances to deposit into the account for savings.
The goal is to, through small deposits over time and gradual accumulation of the savings
account, be able to cover monthly expenses on a house or apartment. Where I will be living I
don't know. Since my parents will be helping by making gradual deposits into my savings
account with me, I'm sure they might want to have a say in where I buy a house.

P a g e | 1028
I take the word "never" as in "something will never happen" as a rallying cry to get
behind, in an effort to destroy and weaken.

"Americans will never get work in manga, Japan, and bande dessinee"
"American designers will never work for Japanese studios in Japan"
"You'll never get your own show"
"Americans will never make a successful imitation anime"
"American Animation Will NEVER rival Japanese Animation in Quality and Design"
"You'll never finish a 600 Page Comic Book Work"

cross off never, and you know what you should probably be doing.

There. I just drew some manga. Problem solved.

Almost anyone can do a decent drawing or few, with enough attempts.
The key IS to draw until your wrist and palm hurt. That's right after the few minutes when your
drawing will start to get good.

P a g e | 1029

Monday, June 23rd, 2014, 2:41 p.m.,

Novels, TV Shows, Movies, Animation, and Comics are a visual and narrative illusion. They're a
crafted illusion. And as every other illusion, the illusion is painstakingly constructed. It is an
illusion that is deep and complex. It is mazelike, and contains many roads and avenues a viewer
or reader can wander down and get lost in.
Amanda, Nicole. These women stand out from the rest because I actually got to hang out with
them, at their place. Just lounging in their den, their apartments. That's how you know you get to
share a bond with a girl is when they give you "hang out time". Just lounging about in their
apartment(s).
The War of Art
Simplicity vs. Complexity
I don't like how the art world has been divided into two rival war camps: Simple and
Hyperdetail.
It's all a bit of bullshit. Complex artists can do simple art, and simple artists can do complex art.
I do both. I always have, but I've never understood the animosity and rivalry between the two
"parties": until just recently. Especially in the eyes of the anime community and young manga
artists and Asian artists in general. That arrogant attitude that proclaims "If it's simple, it's shit".
Not true. And now that I've got this figured, I can manipulate its power. Analyze it and exploit it
to enhance my stylistic diversity and range. In my sketchbook, the two opposites are evenly
matched, but in my comic book pages, it's all overtly and unintentionally simple most of the
time. I've got to find a way to even the odds.
The truth is, EVERY piece or sketch is a step forward in my career, regardless of how good or
bad it looks in the beginning. Drawings can be redrawn. And polished, and inked, and revised.
The truth is, I used to draw quite simple, until around middle and high school when I noticed
occasional hyperdetailing occur. And suddenly, when people realized I COULD "do detail",
they refused to accept any less from me. While I could understand their motivation and desire for
wanting such a thing, I wasn't sure if that was such a good idea. The whole throwing out the baby
(or simple art) with the bathwater (revisions and art editing). You can't just pick and choose your
style or the quality of art. Art is mystical. Your art chooses you. It's closer to an magic Ouija
board than an actual precise technological machine. You never entirely know what the finished
product will be until you see it, unlike manufacturing in a factory, where you can know exactly
what you'll end up with. My point is, an artist like myself who can do complex AND simple art
magic can't and shouldn't abandon simplicity and simple work just because he like complex
best.

P a g e | 1030

P a g e | 1031

Chapter 12

P a g e | 1032

Monday, June 23rd, 2014, 9:30 p.m.,

Post comics page production:

Finished today's comic book page. Today's page was not inked. It was pencilled, with blueline
pen on two pages. The gun was traced onto the page from an earlier drawing I did of a gun based
on a Dead Leaves anime poster. Everything else was made up. I traced the first panel or redrew it
onto a secondary blue line grid paper, so I could sketch the first panel at appropriate size. I then
reminded myself panels don't have to be drawn in their final order we see them in. So I drew the
fourth (last) panel second, and the second panel (third) and the third panel (fourth). I stapled the
roughs of panels 2-4 that I had drawn on a seperate sheet, to the original page I was drawing on,
after I used scissors to play "arts n crafts" to cut the panels out and staple them to the initial first
page I made the first polished drawing on. Then I fed it into my scanner and made a copy of it
(the page) and darkened in the panel lines. Voila! Finished pencils!
Script
Page 1, Panel 1 - 4: Character A raises his gun, and takes aim at his
target.

P a g e | 1033

Themes I've been Drawn To:

Adjusting to Comic Book Script Format

Laying-and-Fleshing out Script Scene Locations.
Drawing Moderate Size Panel Thumbs of "TV" Script Scenes
Free Sketching (Colonel, Volcano)
Action Filler (see previous page). Random Elements of Action (pointing gun, swiping
sword, etc.)
Drawing on Blue Grid Gridded Paper
Closing all art into a Box. Boxing it in.

Computers, Tech, Apps, Streaming Video Apps, App Downloads, Uploading, Online
Live Streaming, Pirating OP (other people's) Shit, Streaming Online Video,
Social Media, and Google, are paying off very well for me. To the tune of
$100s. I'm accumulating a small fortune from my business ventures and
enterprises. It feels amazing. I made the most money from pirating anime on
YouTube, and the second largest amount I made was through selling books and
comics online through Amazon and Lulu. It's not a ton of money, but it is a

The least
effective websites for making money? DeviantART, AdultSwim.com, Webcomics Nation,
Twitter, Social Security, Healthcare, Facebook, Blogger, GoAnimeTV. Basically anything not
branded by me entirely, and not approved by me entirely. Art, Opinions, Twitter, American
Manga, Places where there's a lot of fans and fan opinions vying for attention, and Mainstream
Media are my least profitable areas. Video, Anime Video Publishing Online, Apps,
moderately large amount compared the past, which would be nothing.

Gaming, and Literature (books,

Profitable and Beneficial.

comics,

self-publishing)

are

my

Most

There's some nice office spaces I've seen in Downtown Orlando. Orlando and Ft. LauderdaleMiami's already on the rise as a Tech Metropolis, and I'm starting to think their current status in
the press and tech community could benefit me and my local-national reputation as a True Tech
Titan. Like the Larry Page or Mark Zuckerberg of Orlando Media and Technology. I have a lot
of experience with Orlando and living IN Orlando. It's the only way I know how to live. Plus I
think the operation I'm getting myself into is too big for my garage. It's been a newly
imancipated dream of mine to purchase, buy, and build on acquired real estate, just like Williams
Street and Cartoon Network bought out pre-existing buildings. I think Williams Street used to be
a carpet factory. Now they're broadcasts who own the nighttime airwaves. That's what I want to
do. I want to own the mobile broadcast airwaves. To a certain degree I already do. But I want so
much more.

P a g e | 1034

Why the sudden entrepreneurial enterprising change of heart? Numerous reasons.

I need a home for my new businesses. Not just my folks' house.

I've made amends with this state sometime after Obama won the election.
I already helped build MUCH of Orlando and Ft. Lauderdale reputation in the media arts,
animation, comics, and Tech-IT industries.
Setting up shop locally would be 5 times easier than moving across the country to do it in
San Francisco or wherever. At least I can be a big fish in a small pond here to a degree. In
California I'd be a small fish in a big pond.
I like real estate. I like Architecture. Cities and Urban Buildings, Megalopolises, as can
be seen by my taste in films like Akira and Ghost in the Shell, and Blade Runner and
Metropolis.
"Leaving Florida" on bad terms might start more problems than it would solve.
I was inspired by numerous local institutions: Full Sail. EA Electronic Arts. Disney
World and its subsidiary parks. The Art Institute of Fort Lauderdale. Crealde. Valencia
Community College. The Disney Institute. Downtown Orlando. The Amtrak
Trainstations. Sunrail.

Thursday, June 26th, 2014, 10:26 p.m.,

List of Things I need and/or want to do

Visit Megacon, Visit DisneyWorld

Pay Programmer A ($40), and Programmer B ($100) With SS Paycheck
Pay off Bank Debit Overdraft with Dad ($75, US Bank)
Start Savings Account ($25)
Pay Back Chase Freedom and Slate Card Fees ($75)
Get payment on July 3rd for ($140)

List of Career Accomplishments I Need to Not Show Off, and Be Humble About

My Drawing Abilities
Authoring 8+ books
Writing 6,000 pages
Making an Epic Pitch Bible
Writing an A+ Pilot Script

P a g e | 1035

Friday, June 27th, 2014,

My goodness, those Canadian voice actresses. I never knew how beautiful some of them were.
Like Tara Strong, with her innocent demeanor, and Enormous DD breasts. She's the Dolly Parton
of voice acting, only Canadian. I respect what Tara does, definitely. Despite her great physical,
emotional, and spiritual innocence and beauty, I sense she is insecure about herself. Why on
earth that is I don't know.
I'm a Man On a Mission...
But what is my Mission in Life.
I know.
My Mission is the Following:

Found and Manage a Streaming Mobile Broadcasting Company, in either Orlando or

Beijing.
Traveling to Paris to Pursue a Career in Bande Dessinee (BD) SFF Hero Comics Tomes
Drawing Every Day, and for at least an hour every day
Drawing Comics Page. Revising and Polishing Pages
Get Hired by an Anime or Video Game Studio as a Concept Designer or Screenwriter
Become a Homeowner
Become a Millionaire

My adoptive father, Cary, both fears and hates foreigners and foreign culture. He is quite
xenophobic. The only books he reads about China and France are once involving CIA agents
investigating, and self-hating ex-pats, "cleansing their souls by returning to Good old America
from the evils of foreign soil". "Guns, Swords, all that stupid Chinaman stuff". He can be pretty
prejudiced against foreign culture. There's definitely a lot of non-literal racism and prejudice
there. BECAUSE HE'S A RICH WHITE MAN, why try harder? He's terrified of the animation
and films I like. The wuxia and anime classics and progressives. And ever since I started drawing
anime and wuxia he's been nothing but critical of my art and designing abilities, even though
they've been embraced in Japan, China, Korea, and France. And even though my apps are see all
over Asia, Africa, and Europe. He chooses to put his head in the sand in opposition to progress
and international diplomacy. Stan Smith: "AAAAAUUUGGHHH!!! I'm losing my son to
foreigners!"

P a g e | 1036

This sucks dick. Cary is ams Dick.

My great biological grand ancestor, William the Conqueror, was worth $200 billion when he was
alive. And yet I have NO Money other than the $2-4 thousand I owe to Chase Credit Cards. Cary
won't even bother to pay me $57. It's enormously embarrassing.
To be honest, I don't feel like I like or trust young manga and anime fans. They're too young to
know any better too young to realize the ignorance of the statements they make about American
culture online, and too young to have any actual life experience.
I want to complete a book, at least 1 book in my 30s and 40s. I'll be like Dr. Seuss and Ang Lee.
Things I will work on all throughout my 30s and 40s:

Novel (with outlines)

TV Series Script (outlines)
Screenplay (outlines)
Comic Book Script (outlines, thumbnails)

Powers List:

Art Powers
Pervert Powers
Intellectual Powers
Literary Powers
Design Powers
Anime & Manga Powers
Animation and L.A. Powers
Tech and Computer Powers
Celebrity Auteur Powers

Self Publishing Elements:

Lulu
Kindle
WCN
Blogger
Twitter
Tumblr, Scribd
Scanner, Comp Art Folder Docs
Sketchbooks
Notebooks

P a g e | 1037

Monday, June 30th, 2014, 11:10 p.m.,

Last day of the horrible month of June, thankfully. Only a few more days left for a horrible 4th to
go, and then things might get a little easier.
At least I'll be getting paid again. So I can make some payments to people I owe.
New Literary 21st Century Writer Strategy is:
Write 1 page a day of short fiction.
Write one short story a day. Between 1/4th of a page to 1 & a Half pages in length. I've already
written 38 stories of varying complexity levels, all following this rule, so I have a 40 page head
start.

Tuesday, July 1st, 2014, 1:40 a.m.

Currently, I consider myself more writer than anything else. I'm a writer. Not an aspiring writer.
I already write. I write both fiction and nonfiction. Writing is one of the world's most prestigious
and respected professions.
Floridian Culture

Michigan
Illinois
France
Alternative Rock Music
Computers, Tech, Internet
Literary Books
Anime
Radio Talk/Music
Amtrak
Little Asia
Seminole Indians
Disney
Art

Epic Distractions of the Day

Yard Sounds (noise)

Andrew and Co. (babbling idiocy)
Daytime TV (obnoxious behavior and noise)

P a g e | 1038

No focus. No work. That is why I keep a small army of Tiger Eye Gemstones in my pocket at all
times nowadays. As there has been a lot of cursing, difficulty, and stress in my life. Tiger Eye
protects me from all those evil things sitting in wait to mess up people's lives. If it's not me
they're targeting with their bad mojo, it's the next guy over.
The secret to writing good short stories lies in tenacity. 99% of the work lies in just showing up.
The remaining 1% is manual labor. One good way I can get myself to work is just to be mindful
for much of the day instead of just part of it. If I convince myself to sit back down and NOT
open the journal document, but instead open the short story folder I just made, that's one way to
convince myself to work, or continue starting even if I've finished my daily quota of 1 short story
a day, be it one full page or half a page.
I've just now discovered, short stories are a lot more interesting if you tie all of the character
elements of them, and world elements, and situational elements of them together in many
separate stories. In my Lee story, there were cameo "appearances" from both Edward Richards,
the World's First Human Clone (a phone call with Lee), and a meeting of Lee with Oliver E.
Thaddeus Jr.'s prestigious father, Oliver E. Thaddeus Sr, who provides Lee with an enormous
estate to live in Paris near Notre Dame Cathedral.

Wednesday, July 2nd, 2014, 3:26 p.m.,

That's interesting. I can type as fast as I think.
But the real interesting part is that this is a psychic journal. This series of journals, or log, is
obviously an outlet for my spiritual and psychic powers. And I wasn't even aware I was using
psychic and visionary medium powers in this journal until just the last 8 months or so. Now I'm
fully aware. I'm a medium. There's a name for the kind of writing I do here: Automatic Writing.
I'm a medium who channels the spirit world and the spirits of the universe through this journal of
Automatic Writing. It's a form of writing under altered consciousness, because being on the
computer, especially when I write my journals, puts me into a trance. A state of altered
consciousness, in which my medium and channeling abilities come out to play with the spirit
world.
Okay, now that I've mastered the art of Channeling, I need to figure out how to make the
switch/shift from channeling to comics, fiction, and screenwriting, along with sketching and
drawing.
I've devoted so much of my life, and my free time to channeling, at least 10 years nonstop,
without knowing the real psychic and emotional and spiritual meaning behind my work. But now
that I'm aware I am a medium, I can harness and refine my abilities.

P a g e | 1039

So there's Automatic Writing, Channeling, Being a Medium, Spontaneous Drawing &

Zentangles (aka doodling and simple sketching).
Good. I'm pretty sure I got everything, every element, of my comic making figured out, except
detailing with polish, composition with detail and polish, and comic book visual compositional
storytelling, within and throughout each panel and all 2-6 panels on a page. This can be rectified
by doing more preliminary work and applying my mental strategy and organizational skills to my
comic book panel sequences for a page, even if it involves a lot of rulers for panel borders, and
cutting and pasting from thumbnails on the computer and stapling one page to another. This is
my weakest area because I do such a small amount of preliminary preplanning for it.

Thursday, July 3rd, 2014, 1:16 p.m.,

According to Miyazaki, all mainstream animation is a group effort, despite the celebrity of
certain cartoonists, directors, voice actors and animators. No one person makes mainstream
animation alone. It's always a group effort, 100% of the time. So forget about doing anime or
animation as a solo artist or one-man army. That's just not done. Jhonen came close, but even he
never made a one person animation like Bill Plympton (the independent animator) did. So if you
want full responsibility for a project, make a comic book.
All my heroes are retired from their most famous projects:

Moebius (RIP)
Jhonen Vasquez
Todd McFarlane
Rob Schrab
Jeff Smith
Dave Sim
Hiroaki Samura
Katsuhiro Otomo
Tezuka

Still Active

Bande Dessinee
Thomas Romain

P a g e | 1040

Rags, To Riches, to Rags Again....

I started off with $0 to my name.
Then by some miracle I accumulated over $2,500.
But I spent all of it. Now I'm back at $0 again
Everything I love was taken from me:
My family. My friends. My freedom. My Money. My ideas. My dignity. My privacy. My lovers.
My culture. My family history. And my honor, appreciation, and respect. And my peace of mind
and health. They stole it all. It's all gone.
I have nothing to celebrate this 4th of July.
I can't figure out whether my presence gets results or doesn't make any impact at all. People tell
me both outcomes. So which one is actually real. I fail to see how it could be both results in
reality. Doesn't it have to be one or the other?
Success in your career does not necessarily help you get out of the problems you're life has right
now. You could be the most famous artist in the world and still be dealing with the same
personal baggage you were fighting as a teenage adolescent. At least I'm aware of that element
now...
I must never take for granted the fact that I'm friends with real life anime autuers. I must never
take this secret for granted, ever again.

Sunday, July 6th, 2014,

Never, EVER try to draw something without using reference material. Never try to draw from
thin air unless you're a full-fledged master at art. Something I've never been. Always LOOK at
other art and photos while you're drawing. BD, indie comics, my own work, and Manga is what I
use. And from now on, I vow never to draw withOUT looking at reference material while I draw.

P a g e | 1041

New Assignment. Make a comic made entirely of this specific series of drawings. Think of
dialogue, add dialogue, and speech bubbles. Think of commentary for Mono to say.
Assignment: Creatively brainstorm mono dialogue to fit panel speech bubble dialogue captions
Ask: What kind of things does Mono say to himself and others when he holds swords and dual
wields.

P a g e | 1042

Monday, July 7th, 2014,

First Example:
Dialogue Practice With My Indie Comic:

Status: Yesterday's Mission Accomplished.

Question: Why is it so easy to win?
Now it's back to the two things I love: Drawing indie comics, and writing in this channeling
journal.

P a g e | 1043

Tuesday, July 8th, 2014, 12:38 p.m.,

Jhonen's right. It is "fucking creepy" how much people think they're entitled to about you just
because you're a famous cartoonist online with a hit comic and one of the most recognizable
names in the world.
"graphic novel" is such a fucking GIMMICKY term. I HATE it. Graphic novel is a comic book
artist saying "I don't take comics seriously, so I'm going with the gimmick".
Favorite "Design-Crazy" and Wacky-Funky Cartoon Characters:

Ziv Zoolander (Bots Master)

Marsupilami (Spirou & Fantasio)
Spirou & Fantasio (Smurfs)
Sam, Clover, Alex (Totally Spies!) Marathon
Bonkers (Raw Toonage, Disney Afternoon)
Max (Disney Afternoon)
Wolfie (Tex Avery)
Sam and Max (Fox)
Akira (AKIRA)
Eva "Molly" Wei (Oban Star Racers)
Don Wei (Oban Star Racers)
Jeremie Belpois (Code Lyoko)
The Mask (Dark Horse Comics)
Retro and Pandy (Dead Leaves)
ZIM, Dib (Invader Zim)
Usagi Yojimbo
Marv (Sin City)
Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles (Comic, NOT Nick Show)
Rork (Andreas)
Elric of Melnibone (Michael Moorcock)
Conan The Barbarian (Robert E. Howard)
Spawn (Todd McFarlane)
Johnny The Homicidal Maniac (Jhonen Vasquez)
Milk and Cheese / Eltingville (Evan Dorkin)
Scud (Rob Schrab)

P a g e | 1044

Being successful in comics, to the degree of success online and in online stores like Amazon and
Lulu, that I've achieved so far, through humble sales figures, but still nonetheless succeeding in a
traditional success, isn't so much about having a finished product to send to comic book shops,
per say. It's about the daily flow of work, daily work on the pages, thumbs, and panels, and
keeping the spirit of the narrative alive, through a daily mosaic. Something slowly built in small
daily increments over time. A mosaic of crisp, fluid lines forming an entirely new mythos of
story, and an entirely new genre of comics and cartooning, and a whole assortment of archetypes.
Fame and icon status. Payment and rewards, like signings or public appearances, a truly distant
afterthought, if even that after all the developing, and drawing, and sketching thumbs, and
fleshing out pages, and computer manipulation, and uploading to social media accounts such as
Twitter and Tumblr and Blogger. People will eventually come to grow excited about the
development of your career, as seen from a distance. Getting things done falls to your
responsibility, not the internet's, or publishers, who can really only try to play keep up to the
cartoonist.
What do I value: Sex, praise, money, power, prestige, publication, credit, support, love,
compassion, clients, colleagues as important or compassionate as I am. A girlfriend. Maybe the
ability to leave my house. Peace of mind. Respect. Honor. Happiness
What I have: Power. Fame. Ingenuity. Importance.
My Journals are a hindrance to my Comics.
And my Comics are a Hindrance to my Journals.
I love them both, almost equally, but they've quickly become self-perpetuating activities which
rival Each Other for my attention.

Here is a list of the most annoying (and least productive) type of people in the online and
mainstream media community, both volunteer and work:

The Drama Queen/King

The Frenemy
The Volcanic Co-Worker
"Glum" / The Cynic / Doubter
The Squatter
The Shouter That Doesn't Know How to Lower Their Voice
The Credit-Theft Blood Sucking Parasite

P a g e | 1045

Thursday, July 10th, 2014, 3:34 p.m.,

The Mayor of Casselberry, Charlene Glancy, visited my house today. She's campaigning with a
candidate she's endorsing. I got to talk to both of them at the front door of my house. I've never
actually gotten to see Casselberry's mayor in person before, but she was incredibly nice. Positive,
nice personality. She's been the mayor of Casselberry for "6 years running", in her own words.
That's pretty cool that IMPORTANT and POWERFUL people are visiting my house recently. I
don't know a lot about Casselberry politics, but I am one of Casselberry, Florida's oldest
residents. I've lived here for more than 25 years.

Power and Influence are the Essence of Life. I was saying that even BEFORE the mayor of my
city visited my house. All forms of status derive from some form of Power and Influence.
I actually don't know a lot about politics, which is not to say I don't have and display a lot of
unforced political influence around me

Okay, I think things are going to get back on track for me, if my new extended schedule works.
The schedule will be:
1 polished comic page every half a month
2 Polished Pages once a month
Which over the course of 12 months amounts to around a little over 1 issue, or 24 pages a year.
That might not sound like much, but knowing how fast my planning notebooks fill up, there will
certainly be a lot of small work, constructing and generating visual and formatting, thumbs, and
compositions for each page during every 13 pages in between each major polished page.
This might sound like everything has slowed down production wise, but it hasn't. It's just a
continuation and a more identifiable organization of my previous unconscious work rate. I was
putting out one comic book issue in a series a year for the last 2-3 years anyway, if the
publication date of my comics issues is any indicator.
July 10th (Today): Organize Panels, select which group of panels and page thumbnails I will be
working with.
July 11th: Continuation of rough sketches and thumbnails. Picking and planning of which pages
and images to use and refer to. Thumbnailing pixelated art.

P a g e | 1046

I'm going to enjoy my (slow, slow, slower. Slow again! Slowing down, slowest, then even
slower, unbearable and untolerable, bitterness and traumatic drama inducing), but nonetheless
Glorious Rise & Ascent from Obscurity and Lowliness to Power and Influence
I am not successful, and not a professional yet. I am not overwhelmed with work. It is only when
you are overwhelmed with work assigned to you that you can call yourself a professional. So say
the book of Hayao Miyazaki.
There is too much Satan inside me. I have to find a way to stop my Satanic tendencies. Or else it
could create disaster for a lot of people. Not to be taken lightly. For a long time, I didn't know
what I had to contend with, because I was the "fish in a fishbowl". Now I'm a bit more aware of
the real, true context of everything. Of my own possible Evil. Of Satan's grip on me. It's
important to be aware of the bigger picture. Otherwise I'm doomed.
My feelings are complex, hard to explain, hard to put into words and coherent thought, and I've
done a lot of good for the world. People still actually respect me much of the time. But it's my
emotions and feelings that have caused most of my and others' suffering, and confused so many.
To deny one's own feelings is to create an enormous amount of suffering. But who says you can't
become a martyr (one who suffers for a cause) by denying your own emotions and actions, to
deny natural human feelings and nature. Medication, hospitalization, public villainization,
government regulation, public ostracism, murder, bodily mutilation, a stern talking to,
persecution. Witch hunting. None of those forms of punishment are powerful enough, or
accurately harnessed or targeted enough, to make this suffering of denied feeling. To stop the
seed from growing, the seed must not be planted in the first place. The habit must not be
indulged. My power of my emotions holds the salvation of humanity. People are deeply afraid of
the thing I could potentially be. But no one has figured out how to contain this social disease.
Only punish those who succumb and surrender to it. The system is stacked against those
infected. I'm beginning to suspect the disease IS contagious. I know I didn't start off with it, yet
somehow was stricken with it midway through my early adulthood and late adolescence. It's not
exactly something you can seek professional help about, due to the extreme polarization it's
power has had on society. It's a form of extreme negative power and energy.
I have healed many people, and helped a lot of people. 50% of the MBTI test says I'm a INFP, a
Healer. A person who mends things plaguing society. So can I heal and cure My Own Disease
and Curse? It will take suffering and discipline, and I need to start thinking about my own
emotional strategically and within the context of whatever situation ultimately exists in my social
reality now. There must be a better way than just hiding from all of this shit and hoping it goes
away over time. I have to believe in my power as a Healer, and my ability to Heal Myself. Not
just everyone else in Humanity. I'm important in all of this, too.

P a g e | 1047

Sunday, July 13, 2014, 5:46 p.m.,

My published journals have now reached an epic magnitude, in the most literal form of epic one
can quantify something as.
My published journal collection is 4,400 pages long. It's a 9 book series in total, or 3 Trilogies.
My 400 page books will be comics volumes, just like my journal volumes.
You can get away with not planning journal pages according to days of the week and months of
the year before you write them. Not so with novels and comics. Those need to be graphed out by
work tasks according to days of the week, rinse, repeat. In comics, you can't just hit the
sketchpad willy nilly, whenever the muse strikes. You've GOT TO organize your tasks and time.
One task at a time. One activity and panel/page at a time.

Monday, July 14th, 2014, 11:34 p.m.,

I'm no longer attempting to create something that "feels or looks Japanese", or even Asian. A
good drawing is a good drawing. Why the fuck should it matter what state, region, country, city,
or continent, it comes from. There's good artists in every location, somewhere or another. At this
point I don't know if others will consider myself more American or Asian, and frankly, I
honestly don't really care about that element of it anymore. Quality transcends culture. Or at
least, it should. I draw cartoons, toons. Silly situations. Action-ish fun, with good dialogue and
story content, fleshed out in comic book pages.
Another thing it's important to do when you're "filming and choreographing" the boarding of
your camera shots, in terms of anatomy, foreshortening, 3-Dimensionality, and the illusion of
movement and composition, I find I need to approach my work like, and think like an animator.
A Disney or Titmouse animator. Ones that like to use extreme shots, and exaggerate the pose.
Hell, man, even China, Il. by Titmouse is comparable to my own style of draftsmanship.
KISS - Keep It Simple Stupid.
Bone and China, Illinois, Look exactly like my art in terms of there not being a lot of detailing
bells and whistles put in. And until I draw enough to shake the habit of simplicity, I'm embracing
using themes, dramatic-boarding-cinematics, and simplicity. I'm a detailed ILLUSTRATOR
(sometimes). Not a detailed Cartoonist.

P a g e | 1048

Production Tasks For ONLY COMIC BOOKS, NOT TV and THEATRICAL ANIMATION

From now on: All The Following Fields I Dabble in Will Be For the Sake of Comic Books

Comic Book Page

Storyboard
Comic Book Script
Animation Script
Panels
Pencilling
Inking
Lettering
Storyboards
Perspective
Choreography
Character Design
Conceptual Design
Costume Design
Light and Shade
Production Design
Layout
Background

These fields will no longer be divided. Am going to focus on giving as many of them polish as
possible.
Current stats:

200 Comic Book Pages

150 Illustrations
25 Pages of Script
40 Pages of Short Stories
4,400 Pages of Journals

I'm now prolific in every area I'm a veteran worker in. I'm a prolific Cartoonist, Manga-ka,
Comic Book Artist, and Graphic Novelist.
I'm quite happy I get to call myself a prolific comic book artist now, now that I've done over 200
pages of sequential art. Finally I have a phat stack of comics paper to sit on.

P a g e | 1049

Only 400 pages to go until I reach the 600 pg. mark.

I'm most comfortable writing on Microsoft Word. And in front of sketching paper.
Places where it's essentially impossible to be comfortable nowadays, due to companies
intentional choice to be awkward with their audiences:

In front of a live TV
On Social Media
Listening to Radio
Reading Message Boards
I've never been comfortable around trolls and guys who have a nutsack on their chin.
The Kitchen

I don't believe in hanging out in places hoping to make YOU uncomfortable.

I'm most comfortable meditating on my own ideas, theories, concepts, and thoughts. Where I
make the rules. Not other people.

GOD
All things are possible through God, and Through God, All Things Are Possible. God does give
our lives Meaning, and delivers to us the things we Wish and Pray For. If you Pray for the
Completion of a Long Term Goal, it is as Good as Manifested.
I have my Faith. Faith in Lord-God. God Wants us to be happy. All of us. All sentient beings.
I have Faith in Lord-God will deliver me the skills to complete every book I write at some point.
Sometime, give or take a decade or two for each book.
I believe my literary work and career are propelled by the Chi and Force of God. God gave me
the energy to write 4,400 pages of Journals, for starters. But that's just the tip of the iceberg. God
had bestowed me with the talent, discipline, will power, confidence, and work ethic to do much
more than just that - a 4,400 page journal. God blesses me with focus and originality in my work
process and finished product. God is my co-producer. God co-produces my scripts and comics
with me.

P a g e | 1050

I'm looking forward to studying existentialism, and general philosophy. That should be quite a
bit of fun. Something I'm just doing for myself, not anyone else. Philosophy repels females.
Why, I have no idea, but it definitely seems to.

But on the lighter side, I'm drawing a revolution. I'm a cartoonist who gets to stir up a
storytelling revolution: In novels, TV Shows, Films, Hollywood, L.A., Tokyo, Online, Video
Games, Anime, mythology, Superheroes, comic books, Bande Dessinee, and Manga.
Iconic Websites that DO Feature Me:

Amazon
Google
YouTube
Blogger
Twitter

Icon Websites that DON'T Feature Me:

Wikipedia
IMDB
Anime News Network
DeviantART

It's okay, some of those latter sites are already heavily accused of favoritism, inaccurate
reporting, and elitist tendencies anyway. They're edited by elitists in Japan, Hollywood, and
entertainment in general.
It can take a long time to find an artistic-literary voice in comics. But once you DO find your
natural auteur style in your books, from that point on it is a matter of refining the style you feel
you have. I've found my style. Now it is time to refine it, ceaselessly, endlessly, chipping away at
the marble until a statue of great splendor and aesthetic beauty emerges.
I wanted to generate a minimum of 1 page this month, between the 16th and 31st of July (the
second half of July).

P a g e | 1051

Good news. I've discovered that despite setting my deadline at the slowest, latest possible date I
could. it turns out, instead of 1 page of comics to work with throughout July over the next three
weeks, instead of ending up with 1 page to have handy, turns out I discovered I have 50 pages, of
useable material. That's 2 whole big fat 25 pg. comic book issues, or one short graphic novel.
And that's all original sequential art. All 50 of my pages are original comics. I wonder how many
pages I'll have on the 31st of July, or better yet, new years eve. Either way, I'm 100% ahead of
schedule.
I think so far, the right comics publisher for me, for my END TIMES, would be Image Comics
Current Influences on the Textures and Line Quality of my Art and Comics Style:

Rintaro
CLAMP
THORES
Akira Toriyama (Fabrics, Line Weight)
HP Lovecraft
American McGee
Min-Woo Hyung
Robert E. Howard
George LucasFilm
Alex Toth
Glen Murakami
Man of Action
Thomas Romain
Yoshitoshi ABe
Hiroaki Samura
Juanjo Guarnido (Blacksad)
Hiroyuki Imaishi
Jean Giraud (Moebius)
Andreas (Rork)
Jeff Smith
Doug TenNapel
Alessandro Barbucci (W.I.T.C.H., Sky Doll, Monster Allergy)
Barbara Canepa (W.I.T.C.H., Sky Doll, Monster Allergy)
Titmouse Studio
Miyazaki (more his philosophy on animation and comics than his actual artwork)

All of these artists have produced artwork that factors into my own artwork on some level. All
these visuals styles are often very inventive and creative, and designy.

P a g e | 1052

I'm turning 31 this November, in 4 months, on the dot. But that's good for me if I'm an actual
genius. Because according to numerous recent studies and books on Age and Genius.
Supposedly according to research on genius age, Genius and Ingenuity peaks the most during the
time we reach mid life, and are transitioning from our early to late 30s and early 40s. Which is
good news for me because I'm closer to that age range than a lot of people.
My creative vision is a brand. My ideas are a brand. My art and writing is a brand. My comic
books are a brand. My web presence is a brand.
But my face and name. I wouldn't say they're infamous, but they certainly won't help sell my
projects, unless it's branded WITH the social clone clowns and most-hated-man controversy.

Friday, July 18th, 2014, 1:03 p.m.

I drew this today.

I am the BEST comic book fabric designer in the WORLD!!!

P a g e | 1053
This is the greatest and best song in the world... Tribute.
Long time ago me and my brother Kyle here,
we was hitchhikin' down a long and lonesome road.
All of a sudden, there shined a shiny demon... in the middle... of the road.
And he said:
[Sung]
"Play the best song in the world, or I'll eat your soul." (soul)
[Spoken]
Well me and Kyle, we looked at each other,
and we each said... "Okay."
[Sung]
And we played the first thing that came to our heads,
Just so happened to be,
The Best Song in the World, it was The Best Song in the World.
Look into my eyes and it's easy to see
One and one make two, two and one make three,
It was destiny.
Once every hundred-thousand years or so,
When the sun doth shine and the moon doth glow
And the grass doth grow...
Needless to say, the beast was stunned.
Whip-crack went his Whoopy tail,
And the beast was done.
He asked us: "(snort) Be you angels?"
And we said, "Nay. We are but men."
Rock!
Ahhh, ahhh, ahhh-ah-ah,
Ohhh, whoah, ah-whoah-oh!
This is not The Greatest Song in the World, no.
This is just a tribute.
Couldn't remember The Greatest Song in the World, no, no.
This is a tribute, oh, to The Greatest Song in the World,
All right! It was The Greatest Song in the World,
All right! It was the best muthafuckin' song the greatest song in the world.
[2-part skat]
[Spoken]
And the peculiar thing is this my friends:
the song we sang on that fateful night it didn't actually sound
anything like this song.
[Sung]
This is just a tribute! You gotta believe it!
And I wish you were there! Just a matter of opinion.
Ah, fuck! Good God, God lovin',
So surprised to find you can't stop it.
[Skat]
All right! All right!
-"Tribute"
Tenacious D

P a g e | 1054

My dad's pretty good at nitpicking things he doesn't like about my design style that don't really
consist of logic.
"The fabric has too many wrinkles."
Could you IMAGINE if he gave a criticism like that to Greg Capullo, Todd McFarlane, or
Yasuhiro Nightow. Every drawing they DO has "too many wrinkles". There's no such thing as
too much detail in art. And if Dad says it's too much, that obviously means it's enough. Because
Dad's borderline retarded with Alzheimer's.
Finally, I am approaching the McFarlane-Toriyama level of design detail and wrinkle-density. I
think part of what helped me achieve this amazing level of detail is the fact that I'm not trying to
tone it down for an American animation staff in a studio anymore. Because I'm not working in
animation I don't have to hold back, at least in terms of wrinkle-density in my fabric, cloth, and
costume detail. I think Alex Toth is a good example of what I am talking about. He drew tons of
detailed stuff for his day, and when the animation studios approached him to draw their model
sheets, they wanted him to tone the density down and he couldn't figure out why. He didn't see
the point of making a hyper-simple drawing for an animator just because he was animating it.

P a g e | 1055

Chapter 13

P a g e | 1056

Friday, July 18th, 2014, 8:07 p.m.,

It's not just:

Manic-Depressive
Passive-Aggressive
Hope-Desperation
Love-Hate

It's also about:

Strong-Weak
Confident-Fretting
Motivated-Timid/Unconfident

These emotional areas are always shifting and at war in me.

But at least I can see it now. I'm not confident as an artist all the time. Sometimes I'm timid and
insecure. Other times I've got all the power in the world, and am confident enough to sink the
effort into it.
Yesterday and this morning I was confident. But dad's comment kind of knocked me off balance
a little bit, then the bully neighbor started in, which killed the whole thing. But now I had some
Ginseng, and suddenly I was doing pushups and running in place again. Ginseng Herbal Tea is
an energy drink. Just as powerful as 5 Hour, Red Bull, or Monster energy drinks. But I need
twice the energy drinks, because my bloodstream and body is twice the size. I eat and drink
twice the amount of a regular man, because I'm twice the size of someone else my age. Mostly.
Drawing: Putting Pen to Paper. "Keeping
Industry, on All Levels. Sketching and
Brings a Cosmos of Hope Into Being. When
been known to Move the Foundation of the

The Pen Moving", Creates Hope in the Cartoon

Creating New Worlds with Production Sketches
an Important Artist Puts Pen to Paper, He has
Earth.

Saturday, July 19th, 2014, 6:22 p.m.,

I had a dream this morning that I had a wife, and she was in the process of having a baby, and
she was going to give birth to my daughter, a little girl. I suppose my wife could have been
Nicole, but I don't remember seeing who my wife was in the dream.
According to my dream dictionary: Giving birth represents my giving birth to a new idea or
project.

P a g e | 1057

Sunday, July 20th, 2014, 6:14,

Afternoon and Late Nights are for drawing. Evenings are for writing things.
Reached the deadline. Already. Finished 1 1/2 pages of finished comics pages today.

Monday, July 21st, 2014, 11:10 p.m.,

As a futurist, I'm quite disgusted by how much the majority of society has come to resent and
fear the present and future. Game over man!, All this Bad Weather and Nature is the End Times!,
We're ALL GONNA DIE. Not at all paying attention to all the progress that's been made since
the turn of the Millennium and Century. You're damn right I'm full of hope. Anyone who follows
Obama's True Career and pays attention is. But it's about more than just Zuckerberg, Apple,
Twitter, social media, Eminem, Family Guy, YouTube, Adult Swim, Cartoon Network,
Dragonball Z, Naruto, Pokemon, anime, the War on Terror, webcomics, Android apps, Netflix,
streaming anime, Google, Asia, Europe, Star Wars VII, JJ Abrams, Neil Gaiman, Justin Bieber,
Miley Cyrus, current events, Tara Strong, Steve Blum, Toonami, Kanye West, me, You, and
Obama. Those are the icons of THIS generation, of this moment. The digital and omniscient
generation that hates waiting for anything and everything.
The past is important, it's a blueprint of how to build the things we already have available to us,
but is NOT A blueprint for how to build what hasn't been invented and created yet. That is what
the present is for. The present and past are but a mere means to an end, the end being the Bridge
and Pathway to the Hope of the Future, and all the Innovation, Advances, Promise, and
Complications it shall bring us all. It's okay to keep your eyes fixated on the prize, if that prize is
the future, and all the prosperity and influence of everyone's legacy it shall bring.
The news is a distraction, focusing on gadgets, movies, TV, computers, and cartoons is a brief
reprieve from the depressing circumstances of the lives many of us have to deal with. From
global warming and abusive parents and terrifyingly abusive and hostile, racist neighbors of the
Southeast, to the excess and decadence of Western cities like Los Angeles, to many other chaotic
places worldwide, like Israel and Palestine. Despair, misinformation, infotainment overload,
deception, propaganda, chaos, and general social and spiritual disorder strikes me as almost as
limitless as the number of opportunities that emerge in the wake of all those unpleasant things.
Opportunities to increase one's profit, power, and fame, and social standing. There always has,
and always will be competition for said things.

P a g e | 1058

Tuesday, July 22nd, 2014,

I've got to start taking my career and drawing time/schedule more seriously. My thoughts and
words show a serious minded mentality toward drawing and producing new art that my actions
and pencil marks don't reflect.
But the thing is, despite all that, somehow I seem to have developed a fan following for END
TIMES, locally, nationally, internationally, and online. I have the following, but not the money,
which complicates things. I've come to learn and realize the fans only want ME to draw END
TIMES. The fans won't accept a single page of END TIMES being drawn by anyone other than
timid, painstaking, torturously humble me. And now there is discussion, rumors regarding my
so-called "hiatus", which was me drawing behind closed doors, coming to terms with my
newfound pop culture fame, resenting my financial status and plagiarism from others, and me
coming to terms with this new lifestyle of mine. It ended up being nothing like I anticipated a life
in pop culture would be.
I'm starting off the same way Eastman and Laird did with TMNT Ninja Turtles. Their art book
that IDW recently release came in the mail yesterday, and it really inspired me. Talk about
Media Master Builder 22s. They Built a Media Franchise out of nothing, that's more than 25
years old! I want to do what they did, what Eastman and Laird did, except I'm keeping my vision
Dark instead of lightening it up or making it humorous and innocent. TMNT started off very
violent, gritty and dark. Closer to Sin City than Tiny Toons, which oddly enough eventually the
public came to perceive it as the opposite being the case. Most people are unaware of how the
Ninja Turtles started out.
They started out almost exactly like how I've started off "End Times", but if you ask me, issue 1
of END TIMES is prettier to look at than issue 1 of Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles. It really gives
you a sense of what artists like Rob Schrab, Jim Mahfood, and Jhonen Vasquez have in mind
when they sit down to draw their comicbooks.

My online lessons with my teacher and mentor Tom Hart, (of Hutch Owens fame), start at the
beginning of August, next month.
I'm currently in the process of outlining my goals and intent for taking these lessons, along with
compiling and editing a PDF formated portfolio, which is the self publishing standard for word
and Jpeg documents. My schedule for 2 decent pages a month is still on, but with Tom's help, I
might actually run way ahead of my internal chart calendar schedule. It will be nice to get some
professional input on my comic book pages. Also, Chris Prynoski joined my LinkedIn Pro Social
Network and is now a Contact. I wonder if Chris accepts pitch submissions for ideas. His studios
Always working on something new. Wow. Yoshitoshi ABe, Hutch Owens, Thomas Romain,
Steve Blum, Savin Yeatman-Eiffel, Ben Kalina, and Chris Prynoski. All in my professional

P a g e | 1059

prospect network. So awesome!! Those guys are at the top of their fields. They're all geniuses at
what they do, and inspire others constantly, including me. I can't help but feel a tad bit starstruck.
Outline of Goals for lessons with Tom:

Develop a flow in my panel narrative

Integrate the different kinds of Panel Category Types I Thought of (like aspect and city
and fighting)
Be a more visual narrator and storyteller
Match the polish of my sketchbooks with the polish of my comics pages through practice
and refinement
Produce Panels and Pages more quickly and consistently
Panel Flow, Transition into and out of panels, and Visual Composition
Figure out how to Motivate and Inspire myself to Work Day to Day, on a Daily Basis

END TIMES, Comics Growth Chart:

Last 4 Years: 5 Polished Comics Pages
Last 4-5 Months: 14 Polished Comics Pages
July, 2004, This Month: 20 Polished Pages
Finally. Finally. FINALLY!!! After years of delay and stalling, I'm finally making progress
towards the continuation of the END TIMES story I wrote and created. Dear LORD that took forever.
I've been working on END TIMES since 2004. So that's 10 years it took me to finish around 30
pages that look like they fit in with the END TIMES mythos I invented and designed, painstakingly
all throughout those 10 years. Thank God progress is finally being made. At long last, the saga
is continuing, and we'll finally get to see the actual story of that universe emerge in what will
probably be the next 2-5 years. The Druidon storyline is incomplete. But it's all ready to be
adapted to a comicbook.

Can't Return Their Bullshit

But Can Draft More Pages...
D-D-D-D-D-D-DIE!, D-D-D-D-D-D-DIE!
Okay. Off

to a nightmarishly slow start. But I sense I'm evolving past it somehow.

My Comic Book Power is Manifesting. I'm finally starting to channel my power, chi, and energy
into my pages, and they look better than average. Lots of good sword-slinging going on in my
comic End Times. It's not perfect, but it's better than nothing. Roughly around 30 pages or so.
The back-story text is on the front page.

P a g e | 1060

Thursday, July 24, 2014

I like how Powerful my black-&-white comic is becoming. It's starting to develop real visual and
illustrative power. It makes strong use of Notan and Positive-Negative Space. An archetype is
beginning to emerge out of all that experimentation and visual-literary development. The real
form is taking shape.
Right now, I'd describe Mono in my comic as Hiroaki Samura's Blade of the Immortal meets
Leonardo from Ninja Turtles.
I'm becoming a sage of the page.
By the time I get a lot better than I already am at drawing comicbook pages, I'll be a bona fide
expert at the process of drawing comicbook pages. You become an expert by doing, and I've
been doing for 6 years!

If you're going to get into comics, it's important to not allow fear, anger, anxiety, or discomfort
get in the way. I find exercise and calisthenics helps with this sort of thing, to release all that
negative energy from my arms, upper body, and body in general
If you're going to get serious about being a comic book illustrator and artist, you have no choice.
Sooner or later you're going to have to be forced by yourself to confront the blank page on a
drawing table and get over that initial discomfort of lingering at your desk and drawing a series
of comic book artworks and the blank page that art once came from.
I'll admit, I've looked at enough online porn and talked enough smack online in my day, both of
them being a needless indulgence, but still pretty fun. However, it's important to not get too
distracted. You can't just look at porn and talk smack on message boards like a hater all day. It's
important to get a lot of work done, and practice, too. It's important to walk the walk. Not just
talk the talk. Execution trumps attitude and ego every time. And that means daily practice for at
least one to four hours a day. At least 1-4 hours a day. If not 8-12. Porn is fun. But work is
funner.

TMNT, the first issue ever printed, moved a total of 150 units in the very beginning.
End Times / Art-Manifested, moved a sum of 86 units in total in the last 2 years.
So I'm not entirely alone.

P a g e | 1061

With the exception of perhaps AKIRA and Yu-Gi-Oh!, manga always look inferior to the anime
they inspire and get adapted to. But that's purely because it's a large team working on the
product, not just one artist. Anime has always been a fancy rendition of the storyboards found in
manga series. Simplicity is key. It's not about making the comicbook look as elaborate as the
animation. But that's no excuse not to give 120% into the building and construction of the
manga, page by page, panel by panel, in preferential, hierarchical, or particular order.
No matter how you look at it, it is impossible to produce or incorporate motion, movement,
animation, color composition, or sound into a black and white manga comicbook.
HOWEVER, it is possible to incorporate textures, shading, lighting and shadow, detail, hatching,
perspective, architecture and city backgrounds, characters, and props into a comicbook. So it is
important to go with that. Push those elements as far as you can push them. There is no end or
limit to how much an artist can exaggerate those elements on each panel-page.
I can't believe I got fooled by the impression I got from others out there that you actually need
the support or presence of others, (be it peers, friends, or family) just to get an honest day's
worth of comics drawing done. Good thing I learned that lesson.
Phil isn't entirely wrong. He's right about one thing. I do need to get my own place and make a
living from my art. He's incredibly optimistic about that sort of things. He honestly believes if
you're material is good enough and you're talented enough you CAN by that Horatio Alger-ish
rags-to-riches self made lifestyle. Here's to hoping he's right.
Areas where I don't have enough self control:

Money
Food
Egotism
Arrogance
R&R
Sexuality

Am considering selling my media companies to Cartoon Network or Time Warner. Been making
some calls.

P a g e | 1062

Things I deal with every day from My parents, brother, "Neighbors", TV, and Internet:

Bad People
Criminals
Convicts
Rednecks
White Trash
Deceptive People
Manipulative People
Evil, Unethical People
Evil
Hatred of Innocence
Hatred of Anything New and Innovative
Superficial People
Saboteurs
Liars
Villains
Neo-Nazis, Anti-Semites
Deceiver

I may never get to see my home again. This isn't home. It's not my home. It's a place I live, but
it's far from home. My home is all the way up North, in Ann Arbor Michigan, where my real
parents are. Florida and Casselberry are not my homes. Not at all, and I hate everything about
living here. I don't feel welcomed or comfortable here like I did in Michigan. Michigan is my
home. Florida will never be my real home with the exception of maybe Fort Lauderdale. I'll
never have enough money to return to my actual real home in Ann Arbor. I'm doomed.
Death is one of the cruelest jokes of all in my life. I have no clue when I will die, or how. So I
guess that means the joke is on me, much like the joke of life. Life sucks, and then you die. My
obesity could cause Diabetes or a heart attack and take me out that way, the way emphysema
took my father out.

P a g e | 1063

An M2M gaming studios exec contacted me through my tweetfeed today. He was interested in
seeing my artwork, so I sent him links to my awesome portfolio. I must admit it would be cool
seeing my art adapted into a video game and actually making money from the venture. Well, I'll
try not to get my hopes up too much. I think we all know what happens when I put all my eggs in
one basket, like I did with TV animation. But then again I guess things could always turn out
differently for me. But still. Video Game Designer? Me, a Video Game Designer? That has a
nice, cool ring to it. Maybe I could help create the next Doom or Half-Life franchise. M2M
(Method 2 Madness) is a pretty big and successful studio if I'm not mistaken. They make First
Person Shooters like Half-Life all the time. I guess being the next American McGee is a
possibility.

Honestly, I guess I am influential in a lot of different fields, even if my influence is more subtle
than many of my contemporaries.
I'm influential in the following ways, as the following things:
Artist, Writer, Designer, Art Director - Production Designer, Screenwriter, Storyboard Artist,
Manga-Ka, Cartoonist, Action Movies, TV Shows, Animated Series, Comics, Manga, Anime,
Fashion, Storytelling, Archetypes, Bande Desinee, Science Fiction, Fantasy, High Fantasy, Dark
Fantasy, Artbooks, video games, Noir, Superheroes, Hero Franchises (Ben 10, Guardians).
I am an active part of all the major pioneering genres and national movements of both comics
literature, and animation of my day, worldwide. From America to China and Korea, to France,
Britain, and Japan
Everyone in comics and animation talks about Japanese artists who are hot in America. But
seriously, when does anyone ever talk about American animators or cartoonists who are big in
Japan . Currently, the chain of influence only seems to go one way. From East to West, or East
Meets West, and never from West to East. It used to be like that. If DeviantART and all the
fanart of my character on there is any indicator, with rare exceptions anywhere else, I seem to be
one of the few and only North American Cartoonists or Animators who has gained Any leverage
or traction, or any type of foothold in Japan, as is evidenced by my presence on DeviantART,
and Amazon.co.jp. An American cartoonist drawing for Japanese audiences has a steeper
cultural hill to climb than a Japanese animator or cartoonist drawing for American audiences.
But, at least I'm off to a good start by getting along famously not just with American cartoonists,
but artists such as Thomas Romain, Katsuhiro Otomo, and Yoshitoshi ABe. I've achieved about
as much leverage and influence as one foreigner can achieve in Japan, without actually
physically being there, and even then, presence within Japan is highly expected and anticipated
by the Japanese toward famous American media figures, as a form of diplomatic courtesy. I
guess I'll just have to wait and see if I ever get that famous.

P a g e | 1064

So, the video game developer team at M2M, who develops First Person Survivalist Shooters
complimented my art style and creative vision today. They felt my artwork looks "Impressive,
Professional, and Hard to Do." I love gory 3-D shooters, so I found that complement very
encouraging. They have the budget to make elaborate survivalist shooter games, so obviously
they must be pretty successful. That studios gore and deformed monster drawings really freaked
my Mom out (it is a Horror Shooter after all), so that's always cool.
I've had a large volume of Archimedes-style Eureka! Moments. With all of them happening in
this house, and many of them happening on couches, beds, in bathrooms, and at these computers
at certain points in this computerized journal. It's those kind of moments that make my unpaid
job worthwhile.
Eureka. Insight. Visions. Inspiration. Being struck by the Muse. One cannot technically will
these things to happen, with the exception of perhaps an ancient super-genius, a medium of
ancient times, or a Zen Master of Tibet. Someone who has achieved the highest master of a
brilliant, ingenious mind.
Inertia is a powerful property. Objects at rest sitting in front of the telly tend to stay at rest sitting
in front of and watching the telly, unless something deters them, redirects their flow path or
inspires and/or motivates them to be elsewhere.
I can't entirely villainize Cary. He does too much good that goes unappreciated. Cary sacrifices
his life so I can live my own, even if it is incredibly unrewarding and sheltered much of the time.
He works morning, day, and evening, so I don't have to. While he may speak somewhat harshly
at times, it's a side effect of his workaholism. He resents me because I don't have to work as hard
as he does. I know this creates a lot of opposition from my contemporaries he both gives and
receives, but I could have ended up with a lot worse. He has some redeeming values. He's not
selfish all the time. He's only selfish some of the time, particularly when his unipolar depression
and the delusions of his sociopathic Alzheimer's disease acts up. He is not a gentle man, and he's
very self-centric and old fashioned. With Cary it's hard to know just how selfish and selfabsorbed he actually is. He loves his wife, and family, but he has slip ups, loses his temper, and
makes mistakes on a continual basis. He doesn't seem to like acknowledging my powers,
influence, legacy, achievements, allies, monetary value, and contributions to humanity. He's
ignorant to all of it. He has trouble valuing, seeing, realizing, acknowledging, or admitting to the
liberal ways of the progressive world. That's part of why he left Michigan for Florida. He was
hoping to lead a more "normal, conservative life", hence relocating from a Northern blue state to
a Southeastern red one. He's ignorant to both the ways of the world and change, but very attuned
to the tangible physical reality directly in front of him, with the exception of all the bullying
happening against me, right under his nose that he tunes out, ignores, and chooses to do nothing
about, even though it's literally driven me to be institutionalized for "medical insanity" (aka
harassment from new bully-neighbors) numerous times, and to ad insult to injury he claims he

P a g e | 1065

wants me to blame myself for the offenses other people around my house trespass my personal
space with. It's a complex situation and characters I'm dealing with

Some interesting cats have stepped into my life. Joel of M2M First Person Shooter Gaming
Studio. And my current mentor, Tom Hart of SAW, the Sequential Artists' Workshop in
Gainesville, FL. There's also Chris Prynoski, Ramin Zahed, Dan Vado, Corey Jackson, Jhonen
Vasquez and Jenny Goldberg, Yoshitoshi, and Thomas Romain. Although it can be incredibly
hard to get interaction with Thomas. He and Yoshitoshi are the most difficult to reach of all my
new friends and mentors. As long as you've got somebody, there's no need, ever, for everybody.

Here's my credentials:

Registered 1 Script with the WGA (Writers Guild of America) East

Took Online Classes with Stanford
Contacted by a Silicon Valley Recruiter
Hired 2 Employees as an App Developer

I'm most established as

Screenwriter
College Student
Engineer
Manager
App Developer

PIRO, Scott Pilgrim, and Tite Kubo vs. Jay

PIRO, SCOTT PILGRIM & TITE KUBO
"No no no. You simply MUST conform your art and writing to detail heavy anime industry
standards if you wish to get ANYwhere or make any FRIENDS in this little industry of ours."
JAY
Yeah, of Course! If you're a sellout NAZI!!! People can and should make comics however the
hell they want to, illustrated literature, storybooks, or otherwise. Not simply how YOU waste
your time COMMANDING AND DEMANDING them to do. Like you're own audience of
hostages.

P a g e | 1066

Cartoonists who used Self-Publishing as a stepping stone to Bigger Things:

Jeff Smith
Rob Schrab
Brian Michael Bendis
Jim Mahfood
Ninja Turtles
Doug TenNapel
Yoshitoshi ABe
Raynart
Thomas Romain

Thursday, July 31st, 2014,

I got me some skillz. Screenwriting and Sequential Art. My MONO Omnibus establishes that
factual information.
Seriously. I'm actually pretty good at screenwriting and cartooning. Actually, I'm really good.
What the Tarot Deck Says About My Cartooning and Screenwriting Abilities
I no longer want to be a cartoonist or screenwriter. I am a cartoonist and screenwriter!

Prudence: Dedicating yourself fully to a task.

Learning a New Craft or Skill.
Applying Painstaking Attention to Detail
Industriousness and the Efficient Completion of Tasks
Sticking With a Project Long Enough to See it Through
Accumulated Power set in Motion Towards a Distant Goal
Emotional Context of Screenwriting and Cartooning:
Emotions that Emerge from my project

Strength
Raw Power
A Surge of Tremendous Force
Victory After Apprehension and Fear
Strength and forbearance gained from ability to overcome opposition
Delays and Setback will be Overcome and Conquered

P a g e | 1067

I don't attend public appearances and conventions. Yeah right. Like I'd ever be stupid enough to
walk straight into that heckler-fest.
Gee, I'd love to sit back and watch TV massacre my creative vision, but I have no control or
power in TV. I have control and power at my drawing desk.

Friday, August 1st, 2014,

I've decided I'd like to publish my work on G+ and Ink Blazers. Two sites that still allow artists
to quantify their comics and illustrations' popularity and results. I'm doing this along with
Amazon.com's Kindle program and Lulu's Self-Publishing DIY Print-on-Demand system.
Is online dating really that bad. Or at the very least cyber-flirtation?
I'm beginning to wonder if animation and comics or manga and anime is such a hot way to meet
women. It was easier meeting girls in art school and online. I wish there was an easier way to
meet romantic partners online without the middle man element (i.e. dating sites). I must admit I
am considering dating again. But when you spend all your time at home and on your computer,
what other way can I meet people than through internet and computer.
Even though I am publishing under the genre of hybrid manga (G+, Ink Blazers), my artwork is
currently more closely attuned to indie comics like Bone and Scud than it is to traditional manga.
When trying to re-create the feel of previously drawn comics pages and illustrations in new
pages, it's important to do some detective work. How did I draw that way back when? How did I
draw it. "What was going through my mind? What size panel did I draw it on? What tools did I
use to create the art? A pen? A Sharpie? A blue line pencil? A Number 2 Pencil? A Micron/Pilot
Gel Pen? Or a Computer editing Photoshop or Digital Image Pro technique?
Apparently, I'm finally getting the hang of this comics drawing with sharpies thing. I'm finally
developing my own particular type of flow state.

I locked myself away in a room of my house for 14 years of solitude, with very little human
interaction. Left to the vault of my own devices. When I came out of the vault 14 years after
2000 A.D., in 2014, I had emerged from my cocoon, as a phoenix, with fully formed drawing
and writing abilities, scripts, and comics! After 14 years alone, in isolation, left to my own
devices locked away with nothing but paper, computers, and pens, I eventually taught myself
how to draw comics and write scripts.

P a g e | 1068

My second to newest comic, Anthology, came in the mail today. Once I opened the box and took
out my comics, it was the best feeling in the world to hold a Fully-Realized comic in my hands,
despite 1 printing error with the binding.
It was that moment today, when I looked at my finished comics, the start of my career, and I've
noticed my cartooning abilities are Now Fully-Realized. I'm Self-Actualized, Self-Realized, and
Creatively Enlightened, as the Hindus say. My abilities have Reached Their Maturity. My skills
have Matured. And by Quite A Lot.
Just as you create entire songs and melodies once you're musical abilities are Fully-Realized.
So too, do you create entire scenes and chapters once you're storytelling cartoonist abilities have
matured.
Being a manga cartoonist means you eventually learn you need to develop, keep, maintain, and
stick to a strict schedule. You show up at the drawing table everyday for at least an hour or more,
and you do at least 1-4 pages per day. You stick to a daily schedule, through sheer will power
and autonomy, and eventually you get into a groove, making panels, making scenes, as well as
chapters and whatnot, and gradually build up a collection of material. You won't have much luck
with story at the beginning. When you're just starting off, you don't have a lot of goals other than
to fill up pages of material. There's not much of a linear narrative in those pages other than the
linear coherence and consistency of each page. Only gradually over time and 5-10 years of
nonstop practice does a narrative story begin to emerge from the pages once the structure
becomes sturdy enough to support its own weight and momentum. I'm definitely seeing an
improvement in the quality of my sequential art. The work schedule of Eiichiro Oda and Hiroaki
Samura is closer to that of Jim Davis (Garfield), Charles M. Schulz (Peanuts), or Herge (Tintin)
than Jhonen Vasquez or Jamie Hewlett. Japanese comics schedules are strict and regimented.
The creator and editors put in a lot of work to make sure the chapters come out on time and on
schedule.
It's not just about making comics. It's about building comics, as an exercise in will power, SelfRealization and Self-Actualization.
Current Beefs with my art: Small Panel Size, Oversimplified Panel Sketches. Pixelated Artwork
which would be the result of too much printing, photocopying, and digital editing and rescaling.
Endless reprints is destroying the aesthetic integrity of my art. The pixelation is detracting from
the crispness and smooth flow of the line.
Fixed the low quality pixelation problem. That falls under the category of "Image Resolution",
"ppi", "dpi", "digital pixels per inch". I was scanning all my artwork to the lowest quality
resolution. It's important to scan art at 300 - 600 DPI (digital pixels per inch), to get a higher
resolution image.

P a g e | 1069

Hate site or no hate site, it doesn't die-stract from the fact that I've achieved self-realization in my
comics, and will be a protege of Tom Hart soon, within the next week. Vocal opposition, and
"Resistance" is always the loudest when you reach one of your highest points, which is fine by
me.
I don't read a lot of manga, but anime SUCKS now. And not by a small notion either. All anime
released in the last 2 to 3 years sucks ASS. Like I'd ever be caught DEAD watching any of that
new bullshit. Japan's lost its touch.
The amazing thing about Otomo, is he's found a way to transcend physical matter in his vision.
He mastered physical matter, and gravity so much, he found a way to transcend them in his
masterful illustrations.
Currently reading: Hutch Owens. The Collected Works. My teacher Tom's established
independent comic book. The writing and story are actually really good. I like how realistic he
makes the dialogue.
Left Brain Artists: Analytical. Think in terms of numbers and quantification. They tend to want
to keep tabs on "How Many". How many pages am I drawing? How many hours am I spending.
Right Brain Artists: Visual. Tend to think in terms of icons and images. They tend to want to
know how good their artwork looks, and neglect figures for aesthetics. They're not concerned
with statistical figures about their drawing process.
Let's go sketch a pic.
Somebody's gotta.
Let's go draw somethin'.
Somebody's gotta.
They want my soul.
They want my soul.
They want my soul.
People online, all want my soul
Yeah
THEYWANTMYSOUL.

P a g e | 1070

To be honest, I don't know why I spend so much time at the drafting board when I'm home alone.
There's distractions everywhere, though. Resistance, hostility, and deception everywhere. Their
number one goal is to distract people like me, from doing the important stuff, like working a day
job.
You can't treat art like a sacred passion. You have to treat it like a job. Come rain or shine, I am
sitting at my desk, producing. I'm beginning to realize that drafting desk is the only place I can
really shut my mind off and work my day job. The money isn't as important as doing the
laborious labor. At the supermarket, I stood in place on my feet for 6-8 hours at a time, for $6.50
an hour. I miss that feeling. Suffering just for the hell of it.
As an artist, I am a portraiturist, an architect, a genre enthusiast, and a landscape artist.
This has been the most productive drawing day in the history of my drawing process so far.
I spent a whopping total of 4 & 1/2 hours drawings today, and arrived at a total of around 25
very decent drawings, draw between the inconvenient times of 3-7:30 p.m.
So yeah, I spent over 4 (almost 5) hours drawing without stopping, just drawing entirely alone, in
a quiet house. I've never made it to 4 hours before:
What my secret: I just did a visualization substitution trick. Imagining myself still working at the
grocery store I worked at in 2000-2001, where I had been known to stand on my feet, and lift and
push brooms, carts, and groceries in bags for 6-8 hours each weekday. I realized, if I apply the
focus, strength, and energy level I was using at Goodings, I'd have that much stamina, because
on a physical level, drawing at a drafting table is easier than being a courtesy clerk. By about a
state mile.
And now the final hour is complete: I've now spent the majority of today at the drafting board,
drawing. I drew for 5 hours almost nonstop the entire time.
There definitely seems to be an online stigma attached to making comics and art and cartoons for
money. Apparently some people think everyone "deserves to" starve. Deranged and criminally
insane, I know, but that is how some people's brains are wired to think. Dysfunctionally. Either
they're deranged, or very, very envious of artists more successful than themselves who make a
profit from their work, something the people who formed said criticism never accomplished.
Fuck that, man. Fuck THOSE people. Get paid.
Next step in my plan?
Take all that energy I've got and do another 4-5 hour drawing day. Except this time, instead of
doing 25 different drawings in 5 hours, devote 5 hours to one landscape, city, or character
drawing, just adding layers and layers of details, making the drawings a layering drawing with
density. Something like what Otomo, Moebius, Franco-Belgian, and McFarlane do, but in my

P a g e | 1071

own style. Combine drawings, and elements of drawing, like skyscrapers, trees, grass, and
streets. I can't help but think my city, nature, effects, and robot drawings could benefit from a 4-5
hour drawing or two.
I'm a series artist. I design most of my subjects and formats in a series of illustrations and
designs.

Friday, August 8th, 2014, Evening

Started taking lessons with Tom via email today. Got a whole bunch of useful information from
Tom my teacher and mentor.
Private mentoring and a brief time spend on community art center classes aside, if I don't count
Phil Ferretti and Tom Hart, I'm entirely self-taught. I learned some of the basics in classes and
through mentoring, anatomy, life drawing, quick sketching, fine art appreciation. I never
properly learned perspective or foreshortening.
But I've come pretty far. I never went to art school long enough to learn anything I didn't already
know.
I learned two main points from Tom today, among others:
1. My lines I use to construct my drawings have a high spirit and aura of energy to them.
2. I tend to be highly emulative of the artists I really admire. I make art that has a pattern of
resembling the artists I admire.
Tom is a great cartoonist. Honest, and he doesn't just only tell you the things you're hoping to
here. There's also constructive criticism there.

P a g e | 1072

Today's feelin' like a chillax robot-centric Scud: The Disposable Assassin kinda day:

I'm testing out the energy level of my line qualities. I'm going for a funky look.
These designs drawings are influenced primarily by a combination of:

Rob Schrab
Hiroyuki Imaishi

The Rhythm and Energy of it all, the squash and stretch, and exagherated form.
Retro from Dead Leaves and Scud: The Disposable Assassin are two of my favorite modern
cartoon characters. I like the way their clothing and forms are rendered by their creators.

P a g e | 1073

Tom Hart was right I think. There is a lot of energy and power in many of my lines.
Powerful, confident designers, produce powerful, confident, energetic lines. I seem to have
reached a new level of energy in my current and newest technique I've conquered.
I call it the "seismograph hatch" technique. Because I use hatch lines that resemble a
seizmograph chart.
It's hard to say whether the seismograph hatch is a manga technique or not. It's kind of
influenced by speed lines, but also influenced by traditional hatching.
My Power Level seems to be transcending it's former limits. Instead of drawing for 9 to 30
minutes in a day, I drew for 5 hours in one day yesterday. And Today, I discovered an energy
technique for my drawing. The "seismograph hatch" technique. I'm getting pretty powerful. But
the weird part is, I'm not even putting in 100% of my energy. I am investing work and energy
into it, but not All my Energy.
I'm not powerful. I'm just very, very skilled. I achieve the highest level of energy and force when
I'm not concerning myself with achieving power, and instead simply focus on work and working.
I gotta admit, looking back, I have no idea where all that optimism Phil felt about the future of
my career came from. He viewed it as certain, and full of promise. Failure was a word he never
brought up. And neither was hostility or rejection. He's a dreamer like me. He did little to
prepare me for the harsh realities and surroundings that awaited me, post art school. He let me
down, and I don't know if I'll ever speak to him again seeing as how huge his miscalculations
were. For a guy favored with such opportunity, maybe he was just projecting himself and his
values onto me and my life and value, which are not the same thing. I'm ready to break away
from Phil's influence, and start a new, with a new approach.
Having incredibly high power and energy levels in the lines of my art. The novelty has worn off.
Now it's just a job. I'm less impressed by my own power than ever before. I'm just used to it
being at a very high level.
I achieved my goal. I made a small stack of finished comics. But from a reading comprehension
perspective, there's still a long way to go until they're presentable and I can call them polished.
The comic book pages I made are finished, but unpolished. They're also unclear. Tom Hart had
no idea what the hell he was looking at when he saw them. I'm pretty sure he'll be able to help
me make the content of my comics clearer, instead of indecipherable, where even I don't know
what it is I'm not drawing. Not just a bunch of random panels strung together. Instead for future
comics, they'll have clarity and narrative, and meaning.

P a g e | 1074

Because of my famous-infamous standing in the comics community, I have no choice but to

publish outside of the mainstream, out on the fringes, online, and through Lulu. My brand isn't
considered safe, due to how some perceive me as a threat to them personally. I'm a famousinfamous mainstream and indie media pariah. I have no choice but to exist as a media-pariah.
Now what: End Times sold 39 copies in total, and Art-Manifested sold 175 copies.
I earned $10 in royalty profits. Now what.
Well, I need to produce more work, and develop a schedule.
Take lessons with Tom Hart. Get an education. Learn how to make more comics that will sell.
Even though the comics aren't perfect, they are selling.
So I think if I make more comics for my collection, I'll promote the pages through the web, and
eventually sell and brand them through print (Lulu), and Kindle ebooks (Amazon).

Monday, August 11th, 2014,

I don't have as much time to goof off like I could at one point. No time for phone, family,
acquaintances, TV, or computer. I'm burried in work.
I think as long as I'm interacting with a teacher for my art, I'm not really blocked.
The Intruder

Written by Tom
Hart

Illustrated by
J.M. Matthews
I finished an entire disassembled comics with of panels working with Tom Hart
for my online lessons with him today. This is my first comic book assignment.
On the plus side, the art turned out fine, I drew thumbnails for all the
sketches and panel art almost all of it. And it's 11 panels long. 4 panels
longer than the longest coherent modern day sequence of comics panels I've
ever completed on my own "The assault and battery investigation: Pawn Shop".
The story is apparently shorter than my story, but the visual narrative of
panels for our comic isn't. It has to be anywhere between 1-3 pages. I'm
going to enjoy this. I'm going to enjoy conquering my limitations by running
over my initial hestitation with confidence to draw a comic book sequence.

P a g e | 1075
My sequence isn't entirely finished. But it is finished enough for me to
change my motto of "I want to draw comics so badly" to "I draw comics
suprisingly consistently".
Make comics:
Step 1: Generate Imagery. Thumbnails, frames and panels. Rough Sketches.
Step 2: Panel Planning. Arranging and Sizing Panels, fitting them to thumbs.
Research images for final drafts.
Step 3: Finalizing panels. Drawing finished panels. Scan, and cut and past
panels into smaller panels when necessary.
Step 4: Completion!
Step 5: Start Over Again. Work out new short story scripts in notebooks. Read
other people's stories to get ideas.

And with finished comics at long last, comes more benefits:

A more consistent publishing schedule

A monthly, weekly, and daily schedule
Potential rewards that go with finishing a comic
Online Comics and Online Publishing
Print Publishing

None of this happens right away though, of course.

That's interesting. When the heck did I stop giving a damn about whether or not I got my own
animation project. It honestly feels like I honestly don't care at all about animation and anime
anymore. I don't know why that is, that I'm filled with so much apathy lately. Caring takes
energy. Maybe I'm just getting older. I really only care about work. Not my "career". My career
is nothing more than the work I'm doing now.
Honestly, I DON'T wish I had a TV show. That would require tolerance for a whole other level
of bullshit. Not exactly eager to participate. I think I used to be. But the closer I got to that goal,
the uglier the politics got. And I should say, there's some DAMN ugly politics in American and
Japanese animation nowadays. Not at ALL worth it. I'm more than happy to stay right where I
am. I'm doing exactly what I want to do. I've outgrown a lot of what I used to stand for,
accomplish, want to accomplish, and represent. I believe they call that "getting older". The older
you get the more realistic you are about what kind of goals you set. Ambition is mostly a
childhod thing, for kids that don't know any better about the realities and politics of the
marketplace. Success is more difficult to achieve than contentment. A person can still be content
but not successful by "mainstream" standards.

P a g e | 1076

In the eyes of a successful sociopath like you-know-who, everything and everyone else looks
like "failure". Failure and Success are subjective. What is failure to one person is success to
another. That's the way things are.
Wednesday, August 13th, 2014, 8:56 a.m.,
I had an odd dream. I had a dream that I was being pulled toward earth from the sky / space. And
after falling for miles and miles, slowly, but densely, eventually, I landed and made a safe
touchdown on the grassy earth. That's the first dream I've had where I was falling or flying, and I
landed safely on the ground instead of died or crashed or woke up without touching down on
land. Good sign.
Dream Dictionary: Landing.
"landing signifies the completion of some task. Some issues which you felt was out of control is
now being grounded"
Obviously, this means I've gotten my comics career under control. I'm finally wrapping my head
around how to draw comics how and when I want to. I now have a control over the production of
my comics I never had before.
Cary the manhandler. He's high on a bad combination of alcohol and prescription drugs again.
He's on another one of his drug-induced alcohol binges again.

The world was a much different place in 1998 than it is now. Hell, the world was in a much
different place in 2000-2001 than it is now.
I like Chandra. But I'm beginning to think she's a bit more of an online rebel rouser than I am.
She's a good artist, but socially? Eh, not so sure. I think she got people to make too big of a deal
out of "Ferguson". It started off pretty violent. I think if people inflame the situation it will only
grow to be moreso. But hell, even I'll admit I was getting caught up in that martial law race war
for a little bit. I'm over it though.

Due to the overwhelming stress of the day. With the shootings and murders in Ferguson all over
the news and Twitter, and me loosing my cool, getting manic like the Hulk, and chucking a large
rock at my racist neighbor in his backyard (scaring the shit out of him for all those years of
harrassment and papparazi heckling), and him trying to get back at me for the remainder of the
day, I decided to take the day off from comics work with Tom Hart (Just for today only. I'll give
myself an extra day to finish the comic sequence (Monday). Instead I tried to take it easier than I
had been. And since today isn't an active TV day, I mostly ended up tweeting and just
broadcasting on YouTube. I decided to top a day of revolution off with a revolutionary show and

P a g e | 1077

series. Motorcity, on @ActionToonTV. Now playing on a computer and mobile smartphone near
you. My smartphone business is gonna make me a bit wealth this September, or so I'm told by
my appy pie programmer.

Latest series idea:

A Story About....A Highly Psychic Vigilante who can predict and see events he might otherwise
not.
But where did his powers come from? What powers does he have?

I'm going to become a volunteer locally, in Orlando, Central Florida, and maybe South Florida.
I've decided I want to carry on my birth father's legacy of humanitarism and altruism, to serve
God. To serve God, you have to serve other people. You have to be a humanitarian. A Giver.
After all the troubles I've been through. I've seen enough of people hurting other people. I'm
going to get away from that. I'm going to somewhere where they help people. I'm going to
volunteer to help the less fortunate. With my time and energy. Because I don't have any money.
Plus, it's a good excuse to get out of the house and travel on a weekly basis. Traveling to
homeless shelters, soup kitchens, and volunteering to help the less fortunate.
On Millennials, from an article:
"Never before has so much power rested in so young a generation. The economic, workplace,
and technological power within your scope is staggering in comparison to prior generation"
I am a member of one of the most powerful youth movements and generations in history:
The "Millenials"
I'm what they call a Generation Y Comic Book Rebel. Okay, they don't really call people that. I
sort of created that. But they will.

P a g e | 1078

Chapter 14

P a g e | 1079

P a g e | 1080

Saturday, August 16th, 2014, 10:40 p.m.,

Woo-hoo! I made my deadline, and completed my first professional level comic. I can now draw
comics and manga at a moderately professional level! The small amount of training in comics
I'm working on with the help of famed indie creator Tom Hart, is paying off. He's the writer of
my comics sequence I drew. I'm not going to upload my comic with title page included to Ink
Blazers's website unless I have Tom's permission. I don't think it will matter if 4 people see it
and he's unaware of it. I forgive me. I was just eager to have someone look at my work and know
someone famous helped me with it. Nothing malicious or exploitative about it. But I suppose I
need to take the fame of my teacher into account, and get his permission for everything
(publishing online and off) before I go off the deep end with promoting it willy nilly. 4 people
seeing it without my teacher seeing it first is okay in my opinion. 4 million seeing it without
Tom's knowledge, is not. But technically, yes, The Creator of Hutch Owens is the writer of my
comic book short sequence's story plot. I embellished a few details like a puddle of blood, low
key notan lighting, and a gun hidden under the mattress, to make it look like something I would
do. The lighting and shadows, the spotting of blacks is heads and tails above my earlier efforts.
In my opinion, as an artist I did a great job of improving my work to reach the next plateau. I still
need to hear Tom's opinion of the whole thing.
I just got Tom Hart's permission to credit him in any comics of mine he might inspire, like the
one I just finished today for instance. His email response to my asking permission to credit him?
"Go for it. It's your work."
I had a feeling he'd say that. My parents were railing on me to get permission from him BEFORE
I credit him, but much like I suspected, he was perfectly fine with being credited in my comics
work.
So far, I've finished 1 comic under both Tom Hart's writing and supervision: "The Intruder".
Written by Tom Hart and Me. Illustrated by Me.
I published The Intruder as a webcomic on three sites: 2 blogs, and 1 web manga publishing site.

Tumblr
Blogger
Ink Blazers
Google+

I just think that's so cool my teacher Tom Hart is a famous award winning cartoonist who's listed
on both Wikipedia and the Lambiek Comics Encyclopedia. Two places I hope to be listed
someday after I get published more professionally.

P a g e | 1081

Sunday, August 17th, 2004,

Page Density. Detail. Filling a page up with form, lines, textures and/or words.
I have an incredible intuitive understanding of this concept.
What Dave Sim, Todd McFarlane, and Katsuhiro Otomo do with art-page density....
I can kind of do that with word-page density...Yes, with fiction, but primarily in my journals.
I've been doing that kind of thing for over 14 years.
The Density Illusion. Filling Page After Page Up With Density.
I can't do what they do with art. I'm aware of that....I wish I could with all my heart, but I can't.
So I overcompensate with a Density of Text, "Walls of Text" as they call them online. But
they're not just any words. They're lyricism and prose. Not every page is dense. Some pages are
white. But the probably majority are.
I've done over 3,000 pages with high density, novelistic prose.
Areas of Success:
Art. Literature. Scripts. Comics. Art Books. Tech. Business. Marketing. School.
Jobs
(...That I've finished and completed projects with, to some degree)

Screenwriter
Cartoonist
Artist/Illustrator
Tech Developer
Manager
Executive Producer (Boss)
Publisher
Life in Domesticated Prison

So that's it, huh. I'm going to be sitting on a couch watching TV for the next 40 years, and never
be allowed to drive anywhere. Can't wait. The key is to not lose my mind sitting in the same spot
for YEARS on end. It's the living room version of solitary confinement. Literally. You can glare
at that man as much as you want. He's NEVER going to set you free. You're in Cabin Fever
Prison and he's the Cabin Fever Prison Guard. The only thing that will get him to end your

P a g e | 1082

captivity is his own DEATH. And he's well aware of that fact. He knows it good and well. That
prison guard hates you too much to ever give you freedom.

Cut the modem cable. Now no one and no thing can get in or out of this computer while I'm
trying to write. I should have done this YEARS ago. No one can gain access if the internet isn't
connected to begin with. No hackers can get in, whether it's someone down the street, or
someone in the Phillipines. Every time I write I'm going to cut that goddamn modem off. Turn
invisible. Go off the grid. Hey! What do you know! I stopped "hearing voices"! I mean, hackers.
Too bad my parents turned out to be so evil and corrupt, and abusive, and sociopathic.
I am now officially invisible. No one can hack this screen if I disconnect the modem and work
offline. No one can get out OR in. Thank God.

I learned something important about drawing comics from Tom Hart. I learned it's no big
conspiracy for how to do it. There's no secret trick to get it done just because I'm struggling with
it. People like Faith Erin Hicks are WELL AWARE there's no insider trick to it.
It's something you have to figure out on your own, without any guidance or help. I had a teacher
(Tom Hart) give me an assignment, but I had to figure out how I was going to draw it and lay
everything out and sketch and spot blacks with the artwork.
People want there to be this big secret to how to draw comics but there isn't. It's just a more
complex form of art and drawing.
Let's do the math. Shall we? For every 1 finished page of art (comics), it's genuinely necessary to
complete, on average, 8 pages of preliminaries.
Huzzah. I'm writing without getting hacked. I have so much privacy now, I feel like friggin'
Stephen King. Hackers have been the Number 1 Threat to Creativity.

Wednesday, August 20th, 2014, 7:39 a.m.,

The main difference between fiction and nonfiction literature is content.
Nonfiction conveys ideas.
Fiction, Drama, and Fantasy, among others, conveys a story. If you're writing nonfiction about
topics, you're not a storyteller. Storytelling conveys story. Nonfiction does not.

P a g e | 1083

I'm on the job hunt. In the next few months, I'll be searching and probably filling out a bunch of
applications to work at a local hotel in Winter Park - Orlando.

Thursday, August 21st, 2014, 3:43 p.m.,

I'm one of the most powerful Executives in broadcasting. My status as an online and animation
pioneer genius has made me incredibly powerful. And I have little doubt that when I peak, my
power in the media industry will seem downright limitless. I'm living up to my titles: Architect
INTP, Scorpio, and Master Builder.
I'm Building the Technology and Media Upon Which Civilization is Based.
It's like Ben Franklin inventing electricity, or Ted Turner inventing basic cable or something.

Industry Titans and Inventors I most Resemble:

Bill Gates
Ted Turner
Anthony Wood
Tim Berners-Lee
Mark Zuckerberg
Steve Wozniak
Osamu Tezuka

The Every.Simpson.Ever marathon is actually really amazing. And the amazingness is going to
be nonstop for 12 days. That's very cool. Talk about being glued to your TV. Their marathon
reflects my own channel's marathon, but with comedy in place of action, which I am okay with,
and I'm liking what I'm seeing for once. I'm looking forward to watching more cool shows on FX
potentially. And in 2 days there's the Attack on Titan Marathon on Toonami.
Damn it's getting hard to find time to work on comics.
As for other news: All my main old Journals that aren't completely new but are in manuscript
form are officially now all published online as free e-books on both Blogger (embedded) and
Scribd (uploaded). All 2,000 pages of it.
Am I a success? I'm going to say yes.
Especially in regards to job title, and employer.
I get to work with prestigious companies.

P a g e | 1084

I get to be my own boss and run a company.

My ambition: My Horatio Alger Dream:
I have a career dream. I want my ultimate success to be, that when people look at or listen to me,
or read my books, or watch my movies and shoes, and see my house...I want them to think "Now
there he goes. Now there's a guy. There goes a guy who beat the odds against failure." Because
that is what self-made success and true success is: Beating the odds. Being in the 1%.
I have one main way of defining my success. I define success as the ability to achieve personal,
social, financial, and career goals you set for yourself. I've achieved some of the goals I've set for
myself. I've drawn a few comic book issues, illustrated a 5 page polished comic, and I wrote a
fully formed pilot TV animated series script and numerous outlines and short stories, along with
thousands of journals - But I haven't yet made a living from my creative work or moved out of
my parents house or gotten a ride to where I need to be in the future. And I don't own property
nor am I a homeowner, nor have I been published on a more difficult, none Print-on-Demand or
internet level, even if I've succeeded in the latter venues. So I've achieved a lot of smaller goals,
but my more long-term goals elude me. To summarize, I've achieved a moderate amount of my
goals, as I have many more comics and scripts to draw and write, but I have yet to achieve my
more difficult, long term goals like get a job, earn a salary, and own property and transportation,
even just Tom the Taxi.
It's considerably easier to attain success achieving short term goals than it is to achieve long term
ones.
My parents aren't very good at realizing when they themselves are the butt of a joke or
two...million.
I think September has the potential to be a better than average month for me.

Friday, August 22nd, 2014

I drew for 2 hours today, so far, if not in total. From 12:30 p.m. to 2:30 p.m., mid afternoon.
All my drawings today, the 15 or so that I did, turned out good. They were simple and sloppy,
but they served their purpose, and that was kind of what I was going for. Development sketches.
That's how you draw comics. You plot it out, Then research each content component of the story
on Google (images), then do a bunch of sketches for each element (like the staircase, the wolf,
the shotgun, the old man, the apartment exterior, and the wolf's owner (lady), as is the case for
me). Then after you're happy with the visual development of each element, you composite them
with even more thumbnails and rough sketches, only instead of drawing all components of the
subject matter seperately, you're combining them in a bunch of compositions for one panel at a

P a g e | 1085

time. You do a group of sketches of each component story element individually (props,
characters, backgrounds), and then once you do enough drawings of each of those things in your
sketch archives, you then proceed to composite them with further sketching, tracing, and
drawings combining each element with the next in practice compositions until your happy with
that too. This process takes dozens of hours, if not hundreds over the course of each day, week,
month, hour,season, and year. You can overcome ignorance of how to draw unfamiliar subject
matter and comics your uncertain of by drawing each part of them a bunch of times until you
know how to do it, and can piece their construction together like a model kit on the page with
sketches and thumbnails and panel composition designs.
I spent half of today drawing panel layouts, prop and character designs for my comic (18 pages),
and the second half working on sword combat and choreography illustrations (9 pages)
Fort this Friday, I drew nonstop from 12:30 p.m. - 4:00 p.m., for 3 & a half straight hours.
So it's been a very, very productive workday.
Meanwhile, in Screenwriter World:
INT - Alberts Household - Computer Room - Day
I've written a bunch of binded manuscripts, some compilations of short narratives,
some continuous and long narratives for a film and a TV show. I've written 5 scripts
so far, not counting all the unprinted scenes and internal random scenes I've written
if the reader divides them up.

Note to self:
When tracing with a light table. Don't trace all parts over. Shut the light off at the parts when I'm
not replicating the exact image, and just draw the spot with the light off. This will make my
illustrations' lines less stiff.

Page Count, 2014

Counting: Journals, Scripts, Novels, Comics, Sketchbooks:
January - September
2014
460 pages of writing-art
(total so far, in end of August)
Averaging 500 pgs. of art-writing / year.

P a g e | 1086

Friday, August 22nd, 2014 (same day as above),

It's now 8:47, and I didn't count all the hours I worked for so I'm uncertain,
but I drew for 7 hours nonstop today. With very little time spent on internet, music, or TV. Just
me with a burning desire to learn my craft.

How-To Books and Online Tutorials about how to make comics are for people who aren't smart
crafty enough to just dive in and put the necessary time into making actual comic book pages. I
know how that goes. A lot of it has to do with fatigue, lack of energy, and laziness.

Saturday, August 23rd, 2014,

Nowadays, the only author who I can make heads or tails out of is myself.
The only comic book, storytelling, or screenwriting, and novelization style I can make heads or
tails out of and find any truth and peace in, is my own.
Big things in my future. I can sense it:

Amazon Studios Submissions

Tom Hart (Hutch Owen)
Appy Pie (September 1st)
Comic Number 2 with Tom Hart (Sept. 1st)

Well, those things will keep me busy until at least September 1st. The first of next month, which
is 7 days away.
Monday, August 25th, 2014,
All those hundreds upon hundreds of people at the Emmy's just celebrating how much "greater,
sexier, richer, and more successful they are than the rest of us" for putting out a years worth of
mostly mediocre shows. Makes me sick
Makes me incredibly depressed, even though I'm a great writer and artist.
I don't drink alcohol. I do the next best thing. I drink...gallons upon gallons of various brands of
canned orange soda.
WAS Druidon a mere false idol, or was he the Grim Reaper himself? That's a "What's in the
briefcase" Pulp Fiction type of question, isn't it?
I'm not worried about staying positive. I'm always positive. I'm a mofuggin ray of sunshine.

P a g e | 1087

I strongly believe everything works out in the end, as long as you care and never give up, and
stay positive,and work hard, and eat right, and exercise, and don't lie, and get along well with
other people, and take the initiative, and be a leader, and embrace your own power, and believer
success can indeed be achieved. By you.

Oh I get it!
The wimpy effeminate happy, nerdy, blithering, idiotic, dyslexic, overzelous psychotic midget me
represents the me, of the past.
And the fat ugly impoverished, lonely, unappy, obese, undateable, nerdy, awkward, psychotic,
perverted, corrupt, abusive, homeless me represents the me, of the future.
It all makes sense now. Yay!
What a bunch of totally not horseshith logical assessment these hoo-haws make about other
people, y'know??
Seriously, what the hell's so depressing about life right now, in the here and now. NOT Living in
the ignorant lack of realism of the past, and not moping around and sleeping all over the doom
and gloom of the doom books of the future.
I'd rather live right now. The Art of Now.
I seek Enlightenment through Spiritual Transcendance.
At one point in my life, I'm pretty sure I sought Transcendence through Self-Actualization
disguised as Careerism and Career Advancement. Growing the Empire and Network. Growing
and Managing the Brand. All that Rot.

Tuesday, August 26th, 2014,

All the training and focus paid off. I have now achieved true Zen Discipline and Zen Will-Power.
As manifested in the fact that I can now sketch at will, at a level of control that is quickly coming
to rival the level of control I have over my automatic writing. If I tell myself to draw, and am
serious about it, I DO! THAT is the Power of Training, Will-Power, and Discipline. I'm attaining
a level of conscious control over my art and sketching. I can shut it on and off at will. It no
longer controls me. I'm starting to control it. I've been drawing on a near daily basis for the last 2
to 3 weeks. Whenever I started taking lessons with Tom Hart. Through doing a lot of drawings a
day, each day, and every day.

P a g e | 1088

After more than 10 years of struggling with Mastering and Controlling my work impulses and
abilities, somehow I'm managing to do just that: Control, master and manipulate the abilities I'm
not already harnessing. I can harness journal writing and screenwriting, but short stories and
comic book art came to me with a greater amount of difficulty and suffering, primarily due to my
chronic fatigue I had at one point, which happened to me when I went on solo, instead of with
the supervision of a mentor in comics. Bad move.
Thursday, August 28th, 2014, 2:27 p.m.,
Completed my second comics assignment today.
Each assignment's comic is about 5 pages long for each one.
That's 10 or so pages total, maybe 12.
I counted my prelims and thumbnails and conceptual sketches used to map everything out.
That's 70 pages of development sketches for 10 finished pages of comics, total.
Of those 70 pages of artwork I completed, 34 are completed panel pages with 2-or-more panels.
That's a whopping whopper of 34 pages of comics and sequential art.
I just binded all my more recent comic book pages. I've done roughly about 80 pages of comics
(or) manga in the last 3-4 years. And my graphic novel crude doodle layout sketchbook is around
140 pages of epic crap. With the good pages, my page count sits at 80 pages. If I count every
comic page I've drawn overall, including the "graphic novel of crude art sketches, because I
wanted to build my own paperback book" ones, I've drawn roughly 220 pages of comics.
Zounds, my oldest work in comics and first childhood attempt at it, was 15-20 pages, tops, with
no panel layouts beforehand.
The rough prelims and pencillings/inkings of Mono/Randomosity/Assignments, spans an epic
220 page total so far, with hundreds more to go, more than likely.
From the way it looks to me, I'm putting some solid work into this thing.
Good thing is I finished all my work for this week. Extended Payday is less than 10 days away.
The good news: There are currently around 1.5 million apps available on the app store market,
primarily through Google Play & iTunes.
But the fun doesn't stop there.
In 2013, the App Industry and Market was estimated to be worth around $25 billion

P a g e | 1089

Friday, August 29th, 2014, 11:14 a.m.

I looked up some viewership stats metrics, and the results surprised me.
The audience for ActionToonTV Mobile on Android devices is larger than the audience for the
desktop version of ActionToonTV, by about 4 times over. Mobile streaming live video can be up
to 4 times larger than desktop streaming live video. Which is good for my app. Bad for my
desktop site. But I'm okay with that.

Sunday, August 31st, 2014,

Anime is more popular than apps because it's been around longer. Yet the anime industry is
worth a total of $8 billion, and it's been around for more than 70 years, and the app indutry is
worth $25 billion, when it's been big business for less than 10 years. But then again, that's the
power of the tech industry for you. It's similar to what happened to Google. Exponential and
rapid economic growth.
So. Technically, I'm an entrepreneur, and I own my own independent business now. So
technically that makes me a business owner. My GF/Wife/Whatever, Nicole Cook, also owns her
own business: Photo Port Photography. I own the Start Your Own Business guide book by
Entrepreneur Magazine (5th Edition). Starting a business can be as simple or complex or as
expensive and cheap as you want to make it. From selling lemonade to running Microsoft. The
principle is essentially the same. Invest resources and all that whanot. I think those online classes
at the Forbes Number-1-Ranked College, Stanford University Online, really helped me.
By the beginning of the 22nd Century, there will be two major industries: Industries created as
part of the Tech Industry, and Media industries rebuilt and disrupted by the Tech Industry.

Books
Comics
Movies
Animation
Anime
Manga
TV Shows
Music
Broadcasting
Publishing
News

You name it! They're all becoming reborn online, some for more time than others, like music

P a g e | 1090

By the end of the 21st Century or the First Century of the 2000s, the landscape will have been
completely re-invented by entrepreneurs, publishers, broadcasters, and auteurs just like me. It's
up to me to find out what old media turned into new online media is capable of, and how much
its capable of reinventing beloved old media in ways both small and big.
The Future of Old Media and its relationship with New Media.

Comics, Cartooning, Manga, and the Internet (Comixology, WCN, Viz.com)

Books, Writing, and the Internet (Amazon, Scribd, Blogger, Tumblr, Blogger)

Animation, Anime, and the Internet (YouTube, Adultswim, Netflix, Hulu)

Video, Film, Filmmaking, and the Internet (Amazon Studios, YouTube)

Television and the Internet (YouTube, Netflix, Hulu, Cartoon Network)

Film and the Internet (Netflix, Amazon Studios)

Broadcasing and the Internet (YouTube, Ustream, ActionToonTV)

Publishing and the Internet (Scribd, YouTube, InkBlazers, Deviant Art, Scanlations)

Distribution and the Internet (Any commercial or sharing website, Clouds)

Big Business Media and the Internet (CrunchBase, TechCrunch)

Mediums and the Old Utilitarian Distribution

Movies: Theatrical, Home Box Office, VHS, DVD (Amazon), Cable TV, Best Buy, Borders
Books: Amazon, Borders, Bookstores
Comics, Comic Books: Comic Book Shop, Bookstores, Amazon, Borders
TV: Television Set
Anime: TV, Bookstores, Borders, Cons, Best Buy

P a g e | 1091

Music: Radio, Record Stores, Concerts, CD Players, Walkmans-Discmans, MP3s

New Utilitarianism Distribution

Google
YouTube
Pandora
Netflix
Amazon
Kindle
Amazon Studios
Hulu
Cartoon Network
Roku
Scribd
DVR
My inventions

My manuscripts, comics, Books, Journals, video files and DVDs

One day a profitable outlet of distribution will emerge in the next 50-70 years for people like me,
and submitting your work to millions will be as easy as making one single upload, or uploading a
single PDF manuscript document, or uploading one video file. Like what YouTube, Kindle,
Scribd, and Amazon Studios are doing now. Only the next generation of websites will be on an
even grander, more monetization-savvy scale.
The key words to look out for in terms of content are:

Internationally Distributed Content

Uploaded Content
Monetized Content
Pay Per Click Advertising (Banner Ads and Adsense, etc.)

I have a big stack of projects in my house. One big pile of projects: Comics, Short Stories, Daily
Logs, Essays, Art Books, Scripts. DVDs, and PDF documents.
I have faith that one day in the near future there will be international uploading sites with
international aduience. You know, YouTubes for each of those manuscript, file, and project
genres, where I can get millions upon billions of hits for one manuscript or comic, or a lot more,

P a g e | 1092

and yet still be able to monetize my origianl content with ads, or license it to Hollywood and
L.A., and let other people in six continents have user access to it as an audience with low
subscription fees.
I have a Dream! That I can Monetize the Content I Have Lying Around My House!
I've been doing this journal writing thing for a long time. This journal log and channeling
project, or improvisation writing.
All while only taking no more than a few weeks for vacation in the last 14 years total.
I'm overworked. I gotta relax. Take a vacation from my journals, hopefully.
For now I'm just gonna sit back, shut up, and collect money.

Monday, September 1st, 2014,

The financial backers, employers, parents, producers, editors, and bosses in my life are an
unreliable lot. They never pay me what they say they will. They're late in making payments. To
say nothing of all the payments they skip out on paying me the money they do owe me. I feel
like I'm being taken advantage of, and I AM being taken advantage of, by greedy thieves. If they
wanted to pay me, they easily could. And yet they choose not to.
I'm getting ripped off by these people. It started with Google and my parents skipping out on
money that they owed me, and lots of it.
Surprise surprise, my adoptive father Cary has high blood pressure, and as a result, a very shot
temper
Good lord. Comics and animation are such horrible mediums to work in. They're overcrowded
and overpopulated and breeding grounds for mean, overcompetitive people who don't respect
creators' rights or personal space. One look at DeviantArt or Anime Bullshit Network will verify
this.

Tuesday, September 2nd, 2014,

In some ways it seems like I almost have everything. Friends who are highly ranked
professionals in the Japanese manga and anime industry (Thomas Romain and Yoshitoshi ABe),
a teacher who's a highly ranked indie comics cartoonist (Tom Hart). Friends with famous
American animation people (Ramin Zahed, Steve Blum, John Lasseter). A published book series.
Amazing normal best friends (Nicole, Chris, Amanda, Jonny, Danielle). A future. Influence in

P a g e | 1093

Los Angeles and Tokyo. And an army of very hot groupies to go with it all. Like a fine meal.
Nice.
But seriously, My life isn't that perfect, is it. Soon I might be able to add money to that list. Well,
hopefully anyway.
Also it's always better I get my bragging out here, in my private log where no one sees it, than
out in a public website, where people will think I'm arrogant, over-confident, and whatnot.
Also, I might not look it, but I'm not a big fan of public displays of affection, or publicly
disclosing the status or condition of my relationships. I do my best to keep my social
relationships with friends and family confidential. You have to have betrayed me pretty badly if
I'm calling you out by name on a bad day in a negative way, and I already know you. People in
my private life who I respect and love the most I never, ever sell out. Relationships don't come
easily to me, and the compromise of those I love does not come from me cheap. I respect the
integrity of my best relationships. It's other People who attempt to sell out my family and friends,
not me.
I value my relationships. To me, they don't come cheap. They're sacred. Like most if not all
Asians and partial Asians, relationships are a sacred part of my life, so as far as I know, I don't
take my best relationships lightly. If someone knows me better than the media does because I am
friends with them, they've earned that knowledge and status.
I got 99 problems and my health is the one.

Obesity
Cavities and Tooth Decay
Decaying feet

The last Decade and a Half of my life, can be divided up into chronicles and projects.
There's the Chronicles:

The Journals, and online blogging (Blogger, Twitter, Tumblr)

Correspondence: Gmail Account, Instant Messages

There's the Creativity:

Art, Manifested
The Ongoing Saga of Mono Jubei (End Times Parallax, Sketchbooks, Comics,
Paperbacks)
Literature: Screenplays and Scripts, Short Fiction, Edward Richards Novel

P a g e | 1094

I didn't really have a real life when I was producing those chronicles. I was too busy creating,
inventing, and being creative, inventive, and genuinely innovative.

Friday, September 5th, 2014,

You know, it definitely seems more difficult to stay fresh and deliver fresh and cutting edge
material in publishing and Hollywood/Tokyo/L.A. if you're a writer than it is to survive as an
artist. Staying on top of the cutting edge, and staying relavent as an artist is a lot harder than
surviving as a writer. Being an artist relies a lot more heavily on fan popularity than being a
professional writer does. Drawing is hard, backbreaking, torturous, and high pressured work
much of the time. Writings just a supernatural trance. Much easier. For me anyway. Can't speak
for other cartoonists.
Box Office Dominance:
2014 Hollywood Action Movies (that are similar to my comics)

Sin City: A Dame to Kill For (Frank Miller, Quentin Tarantino)

Guardians of the Galaxy (Marvel)
The Lego Movie (Morgan Freeman)
300: Rise of an Empire (Frank Miller)
Jack Ryan: Shadow Recruit (Tom Clancy)
Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles (Michael Bay)

Filmmaking and storytelling, is essentially, just following you're characters around in their own
world with a film camera and word processor all day. That is how esteemed filmmaker and
Pulitzer / Palme d'Or Recipient David Mamet describes it. If a filmmaker of that caliber doesn't
make sense, who does? Makes sense to me.
Currently studying books written by

David Mamet
Hayao Miyazaki
Ed Katmul

"Narration, or following the characters of your story around is one way to

make a movie, but you need to Let the Cuts Tell the Story"

-David Mamet
Filmmaking = Cuts, Boards from Comics

P a g e | 1095

Comics = Illustration
Scripts = Outlines, Plot, Scenes, Dialogue, Description, Storyboards

Favorite Animators:

Yutaka Nakamura (Sword of the Stranger Sword Fight finale, Detail, Anatomy In
Motion, Choreography, Sword Fight "Light Saber Streaks")
BONES (Conqueror of Shambala; Sword of the Stranger)
Hiroyuki Imaishi (Dead Leaves, Trigger)
***

Studying them will help prepare me for my big assignment (self made) of urban rooftop blade
acrobatics and sword ballet.

Saturday, September 6th, 2014, 2:38 p.m.,

Dad's REALLY upset about something. And so far he's keeping me in the dark about the whole
incident, discussing everything with Mom behind closed doors. Strange. Very strange. Dad's got
issues, and he's tight lipped about it. Could be finances, or Andrew, or Jinnel. It's usually one of
those things.
It disrupted my whole day so much I started drawing master studies from my underground
comics collection in the living room ("Panty Firing Squad", my latest pen and ink illustrative
masterpiece), and watching Starsky and Hutch on El Ray, and I didn't even notice it was
Saturday Morning. I missed all the cartoons this Saturday morning on Vortex and CN. That's a
freakishly out of character thing for me to do.
Honestly? I'm pretty sure DeviantArt is mostly made of young Asian artists. That's why Japan's
Pixiv site is so inspired by DeviantART. And that's what I didn't know going onto DeviantART.
Your work is being judged side by side, row by row with the contemporary Doujin Elite. Some
people on DeviantArt really hated some of my more simple work because it "didn't feel entirely
Japanese". There are some heavy Old Fashioned Western Elements in my work. DA is more
Eastern, almost entirely, more tailor made for Asian Anime Conservatives, which is different
than American conservative art (Disney, Batman, Marvel).
America....Good god. Just look at this country. Look how much being strong, rich, famous, and
powerful has made us fat, ugly, and lazy on the TV.

P a g e | 1096

Japan, a former wartime rival now beats us at animation and comics production, regularly. And
many animation and comics professionals are too arrogant to care and see that the Japanese are
beating us at our own game (animation, design, comics) most of the time. France is ahead of the
United States too, but not as much as the Japanese. America needs to stay competitive. We need
to copy and emulate the Japanese aesthetic and work style in order to catch up with them and be
competitive again. The only thing America still leads the world in is political military elements
and technology elements, as well as literature. But we are getting our asses Handed To Us at
animation and comics! It's a fucking tragedy. I for one don't plan on letting it stay this way. I
need to be the best cartoonist and author-designer I can be.
I lose track of time and place when I'm sketching and drawing. Like this morning. The first
Saturday morning when I never bothered to watch Live Saturday Morning Cartoons purely
because of how active of an artist I've been today, starting with almost as soon as I woke up.
Drawing is becoming a habit.
And I'm not the only one. Other artists had active drawing days today, almost as if on cue, like
on my Twitter Account, including artists such as:

Ted Naifeh
Richard C. Meyer
Foo Swee Chin
John Kricfalusi

These all seem to be people who posted new art on twitter

within hours of my "Panty Firing Squad" upload to Tumblr I linked to Twitter. I forgot to post it
directly. Better luck next time, Joe.

The Main Pillars of my Comics Panel Storytelling and Transitioning.

Gun Fight Sequences, Scenes

Dialogue Cuts
Swordfighting Sequences, Scenes
Aspect Cuts
Urban/Scenic Cuts
City-Sword Cuts

I finally mastered the main element of swordfighting sequences, which is the motion design and
special effects. I did around 25 pages all of swordfighting in the last 2 days, most of which were
done today. I finally seem to have the capacity to draw longer sword fight scenes.

P a g e | 1097

New Elements:

Sword Streaks
2-8 hour work days
Thumbnails
Thumbnail page-panel layouts
Digital Ink Fill
11" x 17" scale pages
Scanned 11" x 17" scale pages
Not being a "slave to the closeup"
Aspect Angles
Gunfire effects

Current number of sequential art comics pages finished: 100 pgs.

9/8/2014, 6:00 p.m.,
Payday! Payday! We're stratifying upwards! Thursday is payday. Maybe for the
rest of my life. I've waited patiently for this week to come. Now it's here.
I've been getting royalty checks, online royalty payments, paychecks, and
Electronic Bank Fund Transwers to my vault for a while now. But now they
might be for larger sums of money, and more consistent, and over longer
periods of time. I don't have a single source of income.

Tuesday, September 9th, 2014, 3:07 p.m.,

There really aren't any cold hard statistics for mobile, live, and live mobile streaming video. No
average hourly rates, no salary info. No percentage disclosure. I searched for it myself on Google
and nothing came up. That's because it didn't exist until I helped invent the market for it just
now. I invented the market for YouTube, too. That's got to be one of my biggest secrets of all
time: Inventing the Online Video Market. Now I'm pushing the digital and streaming video
market in exciting and innovative new directions.
Time Warner, Apple, and Google all followed my example. I'm happy they're listening to what I
have to say. From Toonami to CN Live to AS TV.
I could write about the general concepts of influence and success all day long, but I think I'll cut
it short from time to time.
It's amazing to realize my business and online brand are somehow succeeding in the midst of all
that noise.

P a g e | 1098

I've been operating ActionToonTV for over a year now, and somehow my company is still active
and bigger than when I unveiled it. There's something thrilling about visiting my Ustream
dashboard nowadays. Makes me feel alive.

But I wonder about things: Like:

Will my company ever have more than 2-3 employees

Will I ever get the debt issue under control

These are the problems I hope to solve.

I was 16-17 years old when I finished my first 1,000 pages of journal literature. My literature is
one giant middle finger to lazy writers everywhere. Back in 2000 through 2002, while my
classmates were out goofing off, having sex, and doing drugs, I was busy writing my first 2
books I'd ever publish, which would be the start of a career writing journals and being a
cartoonist and engineer.
And now comes the moment in history of potential vindication, where I get to show my work off
to the world. I might not be able to publish my journals traditionally, but there is a possibility I
might have my name listed in the Guinness Archive of World Records for being the "Youngest
writer-author in world history to write or publish a 1,000+ page book or series" (Manifesto Journals, 2000-2002, Age 16-18). That is my submission.

Wednesday, September 10th, 2014, 6:50 p.m.,

I work in the Entertainment & Media-Technology Industry. This new Industry, is where I am
making the bulk of my money.
The really cool part is, I might be making a salary from my Media-Technology Industry work by
the end of 2014, or a lot sooner. Better things are over the horizon. I'm quite sure of that. And
they're only now just starting to pick up.

P a g e | 1099

Current books in the works:

The Parallax Notes: AKA Mono: The Illustrated Prose Anthology Megamix (10 Year
Character Anniversary history, universe, sketchbook, fiction, comics, and script
anthology collection book). That's 10 whole years, a solid decade of me developing my
concept, Mono.
Journals: Volume V (probably due out the end of this year or the start of next.
Mono (formerly "End Times") comics and graphic novels
Parallax: "AYN" Episode: Screenplay. "The 'Druidon' Follow Up"

Daily / Weekly Non-literary projects:

ActionToonTV
ActionToonTV Mobile
StreamWave Media Developers
YouTube Channel
Blogger Account
Google+ Profile
Twitter Feed
Video Uploads
Ustream Account
Video File Collection

Time Warner (CNN, HLN, Time.com), unfortunately has kind of become a journalistic troll of
the news world, much like Fox, Yahoo!, and MS/NBC. Something in my always-reliable
conscience tells me "Don't trust the news world. They're a bunch of power-hungry manipulators
and liars." Just like "Don't trust the comedian and talk show world. Also a bunch of freakish
weirdos and liars." It's growing harder than ever to trust anyone other than yourself.
I trust me. I trust me to do a quality show online, and to get those books drawn and written, given
proper due and time.

P a g e | 1100

P a g e | 1101

P a g e | 1102

Chapter 15
[Chapter 212]
"The Saga Continues..."

P a g e | 1103

Thursday, September 11th, 2014, 1:12 p.m.,

Today is a good day for me, considering what day it is on the anniversary calendar.
I'm getting a raise at my job in a month or two, so that's cool.
Not gonna lie. I'm a little excited about the future. Things are finally working out. That's always
a good thing.
You know, I had no idea I was so good at Japanese and French anime and manga diplomacy,
what with my new friendship with ABe and Thomas. The fact that they even take the time to
communicate with me and help me out opens all kinds of doors for my career. I don't know if
this type of open communication leads to jobs, but it leads to a relationship, a good willed
relationship, and that's the important part. If I've got the approval of 2-3 famous anime designers,
animators, and manga-ka, that means I'm a pioneer of this type of media and business
relationship.
I've always been big on international communications. This is just the kind of thing the world
wide web was invented for. For comic book and animation creators from different countries, of
different continents and different levels of experience and success to openly communicate and
come to understand and share with one another. But there's also Steve Blum and Ramin Zahed.
I'll never forget my old idols either. I had no idea I'd get to know so many famous artists and
writers online.
I wrote my first translated-to-Japanese email to my friend Yoshitoshi ABe today. And this time
he'll actually be able to figure out what I am saying to him! That's one element I didn't anticipate:
The language barrier between American and Japanese cartoonists.

Then I saw this on ANN (Anime News Network:

The Japan Film Society announced it will host Edge of Tomorrow director Doug Liman and All You Need Is
Kill novelistHiroshi Sakurazaka at its "Adapting Japanese Content for an American Audience" business panel
on Saturday The panel will "discuss current trends, issues, and the future of the creative relationship
between Hollywood and Japan, while discussing the challenges of adapting Japanese content and culture
for an American audience."
Edge of Tomorrow made over US$100 million in the U.S., US$15 million in Japan, and US$364,282,370
worldwide. It is set to win at the Japan Cool Content Contribution Awards on September 13 alongside Gareth
Edwards' Godzilla.
The live-action Edge of Tomorrow film is currently ranked #12 worldwide box office grosses among this
year's films so far.
Edge of Tomorrow is based on the novel All You Need Is Kill by Sakurazaka. The film stars Tom Cruise, Emily
Blunt, Charlotte Riley, Kick Gurry, Bill Paxton, Kidus Henok, Tony Way, and Marianne Jean-Baptiste.

P a g e | 1104
Warner Bros. describes the story:
The epic action of Edge of Tomorrow unfolds in a near future in which an alien race has hit the Earth in an
unrelenting assault, unbeatable by any military unit in the world. Lt. Col. Bill Cage (Cruise) is an officer who
has never seen a day of combat when he is unceremoniously dropped into what amounts to a suicide
mission. Killed within minutes, Cage now finds himself inexplicably thrown into a time loopforcing him to
live out the same brutal combat over and over, fighting and dying again...and again.
But with each battle, Cage becomes able to engage the adversaries with increasing skill, alongside Special
Forces warrior Rita Vrataski (Blunt). And, as Cage and Rita take the fight to the aliens, each repeated
encounter gets them one step closer to defeating the enemy.
Viz Media published Sakurazaka's novel in English to launch its Haikasoru imprint for Japanese science
fiction and fantasy in 2009. The book's cover art was drawn by Yoshitoshi ABe (Serial Experiments
Lain, Haibane Renmei). Viz also released a one-volume full-color graphic novel adaptation of the story on
May 6. Nick Mamatas (Move Under Ground) adapted the story and Lee Ferguson (Green Arrow, Miranda
Mercury) drew the art.
The novel spawned a manga by artist Takeshi Obata (Hikaru no Go, Death Note, Bakuman.) and
writer Rysuke Takeuchi (ST&RS) in Shueisha's Young Jump magazine in January, and the final chapter was
published on May 29. Sakurazaka is working on a sequel novel.
The September 12-14 weekend event will host the international premiere of the live-action Lupin
III and Rurouni Kenshin: Kyoto Inferno films. Lupin III will open the festival with director Ryuhei Kitamura,
actress Meisa Kuroki (Fujiko Mine), and producer Mataichiro Yamamoto in attendance.Rurouni Kenshin:
Kyoto Inferno will close the festival.

I don't speak fluent Japanese, but I was smart enough to figure out that if you don't speak
Japanese and want to speak to a manga-ka in Japan, simply translate you're email messages using
an English-to-Japanese translation device from translate.com, or Google Translate. At least then
they can read what you are writing to them.
I know this is sort of an odd day to be in Japan-Mode. But I'm sure other people think of it the
same way. I have enough distance from the last 14 years. I don't need to look back.
Elements missing from Mono: Anthology Art & Script Book:

Foreward by JM
Backstory Card
Revised Fiction
Script Title Page
Production Design Section
Revised Comics Section
Software to Use: Adobe Acrobat PDF Divider

P a g e | 1105

I feel as though I've finally surpassed Phil Ferretti, as the most successful person I know on a
personal level.
Adult Swim is mostly too SouthParkian to be watchable recently. I'd rather watch El Ray or
AMC, The Hub, Boomerang, History 2, online streams, my own channels, The Simpsons on
FXX, or something of that nature.
Toonami is still pretty good, but not Adult Swim. I was disappointed by Black Jesus. If by
disappointed, you mean I never had any expectations of it to begin with when you compare it to
the first and second season of The Boondocks, or the entire run of Star Wars: The Clone Wars.
Or Ben 10: Alien Force. Or Game of Thrones. Or Breaking Bad. Or 24.
Yep. I am pretty passionate about TV. Not just any TV, though. Good TV. I almost feel outraged
or angry if an executive somewhere in TV World is sitting back while a bad show plays and
they're expecting me to tolerate that. There's 1,001 reasons why EVERY minute of TV can and
should be good. There's enough good shows and documentaries and dramas and comedies out
there, you don't NEED filler. You don't need the crap. YouTube has a ton of useable Broadcast
Material. I cannot wait until the Day YouTube officially becomes a part of regular, traditional
TV, whether it's a Video Playlist, a Series, a Channel, or just clips from movies, pre-existing
non-filler TV, and action anime like what I do. There are ways it can be made possible that
traditional television won't drive the majority of its viewers to chord cutting, and it starts with
broadcasting around or broadcasting directly from the stockpile of Amazing Material of stream
video that already exists online.
I'm equally devoted to static and moving images, and words, or lyricism and literature.
I'm a classic words and pictures man. I work just as well with real world imagery as I do with art,
design, and 2-dimensional illustration.
Nicole was my muse. When I drew Nicole's caricature, I'm pretty sure I succeeded in drawing
her the way she felt and wanted to be seen. I'm the anti-muse on television. After all I did for
Nicole Cook in art school at Sunrise Hall, Fort Lauderdale, I'd pretty much go represented on
screen and on paper the opposite way of how Nicole was represented on screen and paper. So
that particular gesture of kindness, the kindness in that favor of mine was never returned to me.
There. I have a new favorite famous artist of the moment I've never researched before. Tom Hart
wanted me to study classical art movements and artists, and I found the perfect match for myself:

Alphonse Mucha
Art Nouveau (an French Early Twentieth Century Illustrative Art Movement)

That is some amazing, wildly appealing art. I see where stuff like Joe Mad and Todd McFarlane
get half their ideas now.

P a g e | 1106

And there's no shortage of Art Nouveau illustrators outside of Mucha.

Literary figure of the moment: Jorge Luis Borges. Of "Magical Surrealism" fame.

R.I.P. Robin Williams, Maya Angelou, Nelson Mandela, Michael Jackson, and James
Gandalfini

Low Fantasy, French Media, Le' Fantastique, Notan, Noir, Sword and City,
Cyber-Expressionism, Expressionism, Chronicles and Chronology, Wuxia, Black
Mantis and Northern Leg Shaolin Kung-Fu, Kendo, Light Sabers, Tomes, NeoNoir, Bande Dessinee, Magical Realism, Dark Fantasy, Heroic Bloodshed,
Copshow, Crime Fiction, and Art Nouveau, are the current biggest influences
on my drawing and writing style.

Not only did I start my own modern media studio, App Developer Company, and Broadcast
Studio. I'm also considering starting my own animation studio and publishing company.

Thunder-Lightning Media Studios (TV, Theatrical)

Thunder-Lightning Publishing

If you want to be a professional cartoonist, you gotta do the math. You have to figure out how
you're pacing and rhythmic sequential storytelling flow will work out. Are you going to do 200
page installments, 20-30 page installments, 2-4 page installments, or 1 page short winded
installments to fill up space between the 2-4 page installments. How long is each Chapter, Tome,
Storyline, Sequence, Scene, and Issue going to be. None of this happens by accident. Comics to
be successful need to be consciously structured, based on an analysis of the author-filmmaker
cartoonist's storytelling style.
My quasi-avant-garde "It's Time To Mount a Counter-Attack" cartoon sequence
is the longest Parallax segment I've done so far, at a whopping 15 pages,
give or take. The longest sequence I did before "Time For a Counter-Attack"
was the Krin vs. Mono swordfight sequence, which was 6 pages. That one was
also ambitious. The dpi (digital pixels per inch) rate is missed up, so it
ended up looking like a video game, as I scanned it before I mastered
scanning and now scan all art at 600 dpi. I'm getting better with a scanner
and pacing and comics sequences. My dpi is of a higher resolution, meaning
more clarity, I'm on the path to drawing on a larger scale, and my segments
are growing, becoming longer narratives.

longest Sequences from Early Comics:

"Gun? Check." (2 pgs.)

"Pawn Shop Investigation Sequence" (3 pgs.)
"Krin vs. Mono Swordfight" (6-7 pgs.)
"It's Time to Launch a Counter Attack" (15 pgs)
The Intruder (Assignment - 5 pgs.)

P a g e | 1107

The Confrontation (Assignment - 5 pgs.)

This week / Next Week's Chapter: The Fight (Assignment - 5 pgs.)

Total Pacing-Driven, Plot Driven Pages: 36 pgs.

So I've begun documenting the clone-look-alike phenomena. Everytime I see a clone portrait or
image or picture, I copy and past it into my image archives. I've found 7 mostly on twitter and
banner ads within a 20 minute span. Quite a few of these guys lurking out there waiting for the
perfect element of surprise. There's a whole lot online. If I see one I add it to my collection. Just
like a pet rock collection! Wow.

Sunday, September 14th, 2014,

"Live @ 5" is the current slogan I'm using for ActionToonTV. I've decided to make 5 the normal
broadcast time for my network, if it's broadcasting Live. It's kind of catchy. Has a nice ring to it.
Easy to remember.

Valiant: The Opponent

I'm finally beginning to develop and design Mono Jubei's first real
swordfighting opponent to draw fight scenes with...other than Krin. Valiant
the Arch-Angel. The Two Blade-Wielders. I can't wait to pick a time to draw
these two in battle action. Their swordfighting will involve Architecture,
Flight, and Aerial Combat across a skyline. Lots of effects. Lots of effects
shots. I can already sort of sense this is going to be a cool series of
sequences to draw. Already started sketching some of them.

So far, I've drawn a whopping 70-page long 50/50 sword-training/sword-fight montage. The
grammar and dexterity of my fight panels and pages is expanding, improving, and generally
getting fancier and better. I have a sword-training montage sequence that's 70 pages, or over 3
20-page issues long. 10 more pages of additions and it will become 80 pages, or 4 20-page issues
long. That would be the equivalent length of the SQUEE! mini-series.

I have far too much free time on my hands lately. Even with my quotas met for the comics, I still
feel bored. And while play time may lack the guilt of procrastination, in some ways it feels just
as empty as ever.

P a g e | 1108

Monday, September 15th, 2014, 12:46,

If you're a published author, you represent 0.1% of the U.S. population in that respect. Around
300,000 books are published each year. There are 300,000,000 people living in the United States.
Therefore only 0.1% of those 300 million people ever produce a book that sees the light of day,
at least in terms of public distribution or market presence.
Good thing I took a shot from my energy drink. I got some work to do.
Today is the day of the 3's. I've got 3's to work on.
I'm working on the 3rd Assignment with Tom Hart.
And I'm on the 3rd Issue of Mono.
From now on, assuming I purchase a copy of Adobe Acrobat, every time I do a
new fully formed 20 pages, I'm going to bind it in a PDF document, and print
it privately through Lulu. This will be new training to see if I can maintain
a monthly or bi-monthly schedule of 20 pages every month or 2 months. And
I'll probably be drawing more and more pages at 11" x 17" scale.
On average it's gonna be 2 panels per page, or maybe 3 panels if I'm
generous. So when I'm mapping out each page, I need to think in terms of a 2
image rhythm and composition.
So I'm filming my comics, as a filmmaker-scribe would. Each panel is a camera
angle-shot. An edit. A cut. So if I'm assigning 2 panels per page (on
average) that's a cut a page, not counting the cut from one page to the next
(pages 1-2, 2-3, 3-4, and so on, and so on). So 2 cuts a page, I plot each
page using 2 cinematic images, whether it's a sword fighting pose, or a
dialogue panel, or a more minor motion, but I'm trying to avoid non-sequitors
and illogical transitions. I'm try more now than before to make my shot cuts
count, and have each image or shot and cut (edit) tell a story and display
content or a narrative.
PAGE 1-20
"stock" visuals:

Sword Training Montage

Mono talking to Jen/or/Jin
Script scenes from "Druidon"
Scene from "Valiant" storyline
Valiant/Krin sword fighting Mono
Cityscape Shot
Shadow Op HQ Shot
Noah's Office

Step 1: Sketch 1st Panel out on clipboard (thumbs). Get comfortable with shot.

P a g e | 1109

Not gonna lie. I do harbor something of a lingering resentment against the more mainstream and
traditional California Los Angeles Animation and Comics System. You couldn't PAY ME to
publish traditionally. I'm a self-publisher for life. At this point I'm above and beyond being lured
over to the dark side (aka, traditional animation and comics publishing. It took forever, but I'm
slowly building up an algorithm, a creative system of my own way of doing things. I do some
things more traditionally (like draw on 11" x 17" pages), and assign 20 pages to a chapter-issue.
But generally all that watching the media play dumb to my presence....sickened me, quite a bit.
I'd rather do all that shit myself. And as long as I follow my set routine, I doubt I'll have much to
worry about, or even a lot of competition. Not that many people draw sequential art, and opt to
out to instead draw illustrations, which is most of what appears on the internet: Illustration. NOT
comics. "Why try harder?" and all those other bullshit excuses.
I'm so desperate to go on an Adventure. I like the idea of being an Adventurer. But that means
you have to be out and about. Maybe someday.
I have a new social dream. I know how I'm going to network. I'm going to learn Japanese and
French. And then, when I finally get to visit France, I will visit Japan Expo in Paris, France,
where all the French and Japanese comics-animation luminaries communicate with the public.
The only conventions and award shows I want to attend are in Paris, France. Japan Expo,
MIPCOM, and the Cannes Film Festival. I don't know if I'll ever win a Nobel Peace Prize, but
more people from France win the Nobel Prize than any other nation ever. Lots of Asians and
famous Parisians live in France.
I want to live the Hemingway Way.

Tuesday, September 16th, 2014, 11:00 p.m.,

Sure it's good to be me most of the time.
One great thing about being me is my possessions. My super awesome, miraculous, aweinspiring arsenal of multi-faceted powers.
On Greatness:
About Greatness. It is possible to become Great in one's lifetime.
"Some are born Great. Some Achieve Greatness. And some have Greatness thrust upon them".
Bill Gates. Steven Spielberg. Stephen King. John Steinbeck. Quentin Tarantino. Howard Stern.
Mark Zuckerberg. Mike Lazzo. Ted Turner. Sean Akins. These men have all achieved Greatness.
But in an age of annoyance, failure, mediocrity, conservativism, and social conformity, will
Greatness still be recognized, valued, acknowledged, and rewarded in the future on the same
level it has in the past? Will we still publish Famous Lists and biographies of Greatness? The

P a g e | 1110

Greatness of the Past will always remain with us. But the question is, will any of us be able to
Transcend and Surpass it?
I will Achieve Greatness Some Day.
For I am Joseph: of the Uprising Freedom Rebellion For Change 2.0.
I'm a writer, author, and cartoonist. I'm J.M. Matthews, that's my fame name.
I've published three major works that have come to define my career so far:

The Mono Jubei End Times Chronicles Saga

The Art Manifested pocket art book
Manifesto
YouTube
Twitter
Lobbying online for Barack Obama to be elected the President of the United States for 2
Terms
Cairo, Egypt, and the Arab Spring
Weathering a Volatile Florida and American Landscape through times of great turmoil
Being an almost-famous Icon and Hero to the common people
Bringing back the most popular cable programming block of all time: Toonami
Mainstreamizing anime, manga, and Asian Culture
Helping to put Adult Swim on the map
Being the Google, Anime Posterboy

I have other accomplishments, but these really put me on the public radar.

All this waiting to get paid is driving me crazy.

I published-purchased 3 books today. 2 comics and 1 art-writings book.

Mono - Issues 1-2 (20 pgs. each)

MONO: The 10th Anniversary Anthology Megamix

Currently, I am the author of more than 20 books-&-comics. It averages out to around 15 books,
and 5 comics. Give or take.

P a g e | 1111

Counted my Fantasy Story pages, in alternating media. I've written 43 pages of Novels
(Novelization tangentially related), 53 comic book pages, and 22 script pages.
That's 118 pages of Contemporary Fantasy Literature
...Not enough to warrant Arrogance of That Magnitude.

Okay, so I'm a fantasy auteur.

For as long as people have been making comics, the Japanese manga-ka have been ripping off
the less successful French artists over in Europe. Herge, Moebius, Jodorowsky. You name it.
French comics like Moebius, Schuiten, and Herge is where hyperdetailed virtuosic comic books
emerged from.
The biggest audience for my manga is on G+, what with the 77,000 views it's gotten there. Can't
argue with those kind of figures. Clearly there is some kind of audience there. For every 4-5 +'s I
get, it's accompanied by 100s upon 100s of private views people don't know about.
That's Me! Master of Fantasy & Dramatic Action.
Decent Writers of Fantasy:

Stephen King, James Joyce

Jhonen Vasquez
Hiroaki Samura
George Lucas
JK Rowling, Lewis Carroll, Brothers Grimm
JRR Tolkien
Isaac Asimov, William Gibson, Philip K. Dick, Arthur Conan Doyle
Dan Brown, Orson Scott Card
Pulp Writers: HP Lovecraft, HG Wells, Michael Moorcock, Robert E. Howard
Mario Puzo, Tom Clancy, John Steinbeck
Richard Matheson, Peter S. Beagle
Quentin Tarantino
Tim Burton
Stan Sakai
Osamu Tezuka
Windsor McCay
Moebius
Frank Miller
Magical Realism (Jorge Luis Borges, Gao Xingjian)

P a g e | 1112

My journal is the Wikipedia of Journals. If that makes any sense. Just this big book library and
paper factory or museum and database of my thoughts, I know this is my Dad's computer I do all
of this writing on, but he should learn to share. I need this computer to organize my career just as
much as he does. This computer has all my writing and art. My desktop has my video archive.
And then there's the house of 1300 Queen Elaine Drive, Casselberry, FL, 32707 that I have a
love hate relationship with. And then there's the residents of this house, which is surrounded by
an atmosphere that's a mixture of King of the Hill and The Boondocks, or numerous other
suburban sitcoms and dramas. Oh god, the house. Sometimes it's so quiet. Other times the
atmosphere ranges from terrifying to loudly disturbing, depending on the obviously unstable
temperaments of the sky weather and back alley neighbors. Then there's the most unstable,
mysterious room of all: My room, where some say I create hit online TV shows and channel
Satan and beautiful women that probably don't really exist anywhere near here. It's also got that
amazing Roku Box, Writing Desk, DVD Wallet, and flat screen, big screen TV. I also have, like,
a million video files on the comp in that room, and the latest version of Windows (8).
There are some unresolved issues that could affect the future of this family:

The House (What will become of it)

Neighbors (Tolerance-Hatred; Noise-Silence)
Parents (Will they ever move. When will they die?)
Brother (His chaos. His Family. His mess. His arrogance. His Insecurity)
Joseph's Employment, Health, Finances, Luck (Will they improve or remain the same?)

That's enough Suburban Fairy Tales for one day. Moving on...

I'm a cartoonist. I'm a novelist. And I am a screenwriter. Ironically I have an innate ability for all
3 fields.
A Novelist's and Screenwriter's query letter and general presentation needs to be just as well
written, well spoken, and well conceived / planned as his actual Novel and Pilot Script. Just like
if an artist and cartoonist is going to submit samples of his series to a publisher or agent, he
needs to be submitting his Most Polished comic book pages. No sloppy incorrect lines. Just
polish and organization.
Things Studios, Publishers, and Agents are buying:

Novel Manuscripts
Comic Book Samples / Trade Paperbacks
Pilot Scripts
Animated Series Presentations (Booklets)

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Saturday, September 20th, 2014, 4:07,

Revisiting my project:
Where are my story notes? What room of the House? What PC Folder? What PC Word
Document File? Remember what I forgot. What will be expanded?
...After a bit of searching, I found the notes.
I have enough literary material to work on outlines for novels-scripts with.
I'm moving onto new questions now. Like, should I keep inventing new plot & story concepts,
loglines, and ideas?...or just expand and add details and space to the story and plot concepts I
already have? I'm going to go with the latter solution, as the form solution will never create
endings or closure to any of my stories. It will just keep creating new ones.
Finish and combine a bunch of old stories. Don't start a bunch of new ones.
I've
written
many
short
stories
about
crime,
justice,
criminals,
investigators, international mysteries, travel, Journeys, treasure hunts,
charismatic protagonists, vigilantes, and apparitions, or "ghosts". I write
stories about apparitions, phantoms, phantasms, ghosts, and spirits, often
malevolent, often lacking closure with the human world.

So far I've finished over 120 pages of relatively decent comics and sequential art, or perhaps
manga-art, depending on how the reader looks at it. Nny Trade is 7 issues long at 140 pages.
Mono is 6 issues in length, and 120 pages, trailing by 20 pages. Shouldn't be too tough to catch
up. The slush pile is also getting thicker. My throw away page piles are getting dense, too.
But at least I'm getting better at this craft. The wild world of comics.
Stages of my Art Career in Comics:
First Stage: I published comic books that weren't really comics but sequential illustrations, one
illustration per page, with maybe 1% of those pages being good comics.
Second Stage: I began sketching up comics for print, but my efforts were weak. They didn't
reveal any particular talent or skill, other than a skill of fortitude. Sticking with it through tough
times. Publishing entire trade paper back full of nearly all bad art(work). Struggling period.
Third Stage (Current Stage): I'm publishing 60% good comics pages 30% bad comics pages, but
my page count shot through the roof after I worked out an exercise to practice and work hard
every day, and sometimes even manage to draw a page of comics a day. Quality of pages is
improving drastically

P a g e | 1114

I started off my career as a novelist as a short story writer, both of normal fantasy fiction, and an
incremental short fiction log of a fictional protagonist I'm beginning to like more and more.
There's also the boy genius adventurer characters I tend to write a lot of stories with: Characters
like Oliver-E and Lee Wonders. Young men, Lee is 22, and Oliver is 14, Loner prodigies that go
on adventures with older science professors and spirits, primarily in Europe (France, England)
and the African and Desert towns of the Middle East.
Jack Knight, Mono Jubei, and Edward Richards are more American-Centric.
My so-called "Glory Days" are behind me. They're ancient history now. Actually they were more
horrible than glorious, if I remember correctly. From now on, it's just work with no money
earned. Depressing, but true.
Lying isn't all bad. At one point I made over $2,000 purely on partial lying to people richer than
me. I'm out of that game now, though.

Schedule time!
The deadline for my first 2 books is 2017. 2015-2017 (3 years or less). That's how much time
LucasFilm has set aside to film and produce Star Wars Episode VII. They're setting the example,
but if it takes them that little of a span of time to make a movie, I want to see if I can do the same
thing time-wise with a book or comic book trade, one that has a story and fleshed out, polished
artwork
Year 1: 10 issues (20 pages each), 200 page total. (2 issue completed)
Year 2 1 Novel 120 - 200 pages of story / outline total (4 pages complete)
I've got the Power. I've got the Control. I've got the People's Trust. I've got the influence.
I'm the Leader.
I am a firm believer in the Horatio Alger concept of the American dream. And whatever amount
of success I have, I can assure you it's self-made and arrived from humble beginnings. My
background is incredibly humble. Not to mention humbling.
I'm both an idea man visionary, and a self-made man.
I grow tired of bothering with Amanda and Nicole. The most high maintenance girlfriends in the
world. Time I found some other women to go screw. Ones I'll actually get to see. If I do have sex
maybe probably eventually No Idea, it won't be with Nicole. Screw waiting around for her.
The media and other comics creators are misconstruing what I'm writing again. Three years isn't
the jumping off point. Nor is it the end for my series. It's the deadline I have to finish by.

P a g e | 1115

Introducing: Responsible Grown Up Joseph

RESPONSIBLE GROWN UP JOSEPH
Responsible Grown Up Joseph Matthew Alberts says: What's all this standing around without
purpose. THERE ARE THINGS TO BE DONE! THE CATS NEED FEEDING. These cats rely
on me for their survival, nourishment, and food. They are my children.
Too many artists I formerly admired in the past weren't drawing comics for fun and enjoyment.
They weren't doing it for the love. They were doing it for the payoff. The pay day. The fans. The
sex. The rewards. The money and glamorous, glorious fame.
I can understand how some people might see rewards as a good motivator, but it's actually a
really horrible one. The reward has to be the reward of working on new work. Nothing more. It's
can't be tied to money, fame, power, emotional gratification, or popularity, or else when you
DON'T end up getting rewarded, you will refuse to let yourself keep working, and call it quits on
your career midway through. Too many people get into this comic book game for the wrong
reason. They want dates, sex, power, fame and money or whatever.
All right! It's Autumn, and then Winter. My two favorite times of year. And the first day of
Autumn happened on my lucky day: Tuesday.
Elements of my work I like and enjoy:

e-publishing
Self-Publishing Each Issue on Kindle & Lulu.com
Drawing each panel-to-page on 11" x 17" and 8.5" x 11" paper
Google+ Readership
Having the chance to carve out a daily schedule and work pattern

Wednesday, September 24th, 2014, 5:00 p.m.,

Jesus Christ I suck at character design. I'm terrible at drawing anything that isn't Mono. I need
and want to branch out. The only character who comes anywhere close to Mono in design quality
is Jennifer, and even her I tend to struggle with anatomy as it relates to her head. Every time I
draw a face or a head, it ends up beloning to Mono, unless I really deform it, and then it normally
belongs to Krin. I gotta loosen up. I'm actually quite terrible at coming up with an ensemble cast.
I used to be a very decent animation character designer, too. But I must have lost the spark.
Taking some online life drawing tutorials to get myself re-aquainted with anatomical design
again:
Here's one URL...:

P a g e | 1116

http://artists.pixelovely.com/practice-tools/figure-drawing/
Emotional state during evening, at beginning of drawing session: Uneasy, Depressed.
Disappointed.
I was having problems, struggling with women's character design and female faces. But 3 hours
later, after persevering at my art, I ended up with 23 pages of sketches and 1 or 3 actual decent
designs.
Emotional state after filling 3 page drawnig quota for day and relatively easily finishing 25 pages
on Desktop and couch?: Happy, Peaceful, Content, Satisfied. At least I did enough sketch
illustrations.
If you think drawing isn't work and labor, or shouldn't be work and labor, or a job, you're lying to
yourself. Slap some sense into yourself and stop playing pretend and being delusion. When
you're drawing, you gotta' TASTE THE PAIN! Ow. Krak. Snap. TASTE THE PAIN!
The Mono series has survived a name change, and shifting distribution ownership, and is a
syndicated comic book series, Available through the following outlets:

Amazon Kindle
Lulu
Blogger
Webs
Tumblr
Google+
Ink Blazers

Saturday, September 27th, 2014, 11:01 p.m.,

Yet again I am setting out on a Quest to define that which for the most part has little to no preestablished definition. What is it loosely referred to?
Conceptual Illustration. I Am a Conceptual Illustrator, in this instance, setting out by scouring art
books and illustrative literature online and in print, to establish what the art and potential
business of conceptual illustration means to me. Art-Manifested and my sketchbook archives
defined some of it. A little perhaps. A good few hundred pages worth, but if I'm going to define a
genre, I'm going to need more.
Conceptual Illustration blurs the line between functional-utilitarian and fashionable-aesthetic.
And it blurs the line between abstract-surrealism and painterly fine art. It's what I've been
drawing all along in my books, and what I've been seeing all along on the blank page and in my
mind.

P a g e | 1117

Sunday, September 28th, 2014, 5:04 p.m.,

I LOVE having famous friends. Having famous mentors, friends, and contacts is online and in
person on incredibly rare occasions, is one of my favorite hobbies in the world. I like talking to
famous people even more than I like anime. Anime you can watch as much of as you want, but
getting to know and trust famous people is a more rare and special occurrence. I'm also big on
loyalty. I never abandon people who express loyalty to myself. The Chrises, Stonergoths, and
Ramins of the world.
Monday, September 29th, 2014, 2:04 a.m.
Been a long week. Been a long month, too. Honestly? I don't know how I got here. I'm not
accustomed to working in this manner, doing things like spending 8 hours redrawing a comic
book page, on assignment. What am I doing man! And yet it feels kind of right. Working this
hard on my art makes me so happy. The secret is to let my new work guide me. Determine my
course of action by following the pathway and trail that feels the best.
My books and comics have sold a collective 200 copies on Amazon Kindle Press.
And I've earned a total of 5% of that, or $10.
My top book is ranked around 1 millionth place on the Amazon bestseller list, meaning it
probably isn't actually a bestseller. But it is some form of seller. Which means a lot of books sell
better than mine, but my books still sell better than quite a few others. Inferior to some. Superior
to others. That is my "Author Status Level"
So if I want to know what my art and comics or worth, I can just say they're worth 200 copies
and 10 dollars.
Tuesday, September 30th, 2014, 7:41,
Right now the thing that brings me the most happiness, the most joy...
Is D.V. Digital Video. Whether downloaded, uploaded, ripped, burnt, authored to disc, or edited.
I love it all. That and WATCHING the videos. I could mess around with video in my bedroom
all day long for the rest of my life. And I might. I might even try to see if I can make a career
out of it. Not just publishing and cartooning and inventing apps and hardware.

I predict the year 2020, and age 35 will be the breakout time period for me in terms of drawing
comics. I suppose being over the hill won't be so bad. I'll be beyond fully grown when I'm 35,
and ready to take on the world

P a g e | 1118

When I turn 35, I'll be mad skilled at comics. Tom's lessons are helpful, but he's probably already
taught me everything I need to know:

Spend more time on your illustrations

don't make drawings too simple
Strategize
Draw on 11 x 17
Pencil AND ink (switch between the two)
Sketch and draw everyday
Don't study before drawing.
Don't over-think or over-analyze the process
Study Life Drawing
Concentrate, Focus
8.5 x 11 - 1 pg. = 1 panel
Have reference material to look at for motivation, inspiration
Listen to energy music while drawing
5 hour energy, caffeine

Wednesday, October 1st, 2014, 11:46 a.m.,

I finally have a unique comic book style. It's the Japanese-French Influenced Notan-Noir Black
style! Produced 3 new pages in that style this morning.
Also, I noticed Mono uses a Samurai Sword and practices Kendo with it. But he wields it like a
broadsword out of Lord of the Rings and Conan. Coolio. He's a hybrid warrior. It's meant to be a
High Fantasy Warrior-Noir Manga-Comic, but his name's Mono, he's just like a samurai(! One
Piece reference!). Meanwhile my use of blacks is he. When I draw Mono's Trench, I mean for it
to be a symbolism, for a Fantasy cloak, or a Superhero Cape. Just like how I intend for his
samurai sword to be a symbolism for a high fantasy broadsword.
I'm sensing a lot of energy coming from my videos and comics publishing. It's really starting to
take off. We have Lift-Off.
The shocking part is I'm actually starting to see some of that improvement in my comics pages
I've been hoping for.

Thursday, October 2nd, 2014, 2:53 p.m.,

New Media outsells old almost every time nowadays. Technology and new media will be an
easier way for me to make money than old media.

P a g e | 1119

Why is this, you ask?

Well, because no one really wants to do things the traditional or old way anymore.
Technology, Digital, and Internet Brands are the highest selling form of media in the existence of
the world right now. And their reach is further than traditional linear, Hollywood, L.A., TV,
animation, and movie media, which isn't even mobile.
My media philosophy?:
"If I can't make my own shows. If I can't create, animate, draw, write,
design, fund and produce my own show with a cast and crew, I'll help
broadcast somebody else's. If I can't make My Dreams come true, I'll help
make other people's dreams come true in the same field, by way of technology
and ingenuity."

No one ever writes anything about me. I write about others, but others never write about me.
Not with my name anyway.
I'm breaking up with Nicole. She isn't anything to me. Not anymore. Clearly if she wanted to
speak to me, she would have. Whatever this was, it's over. No dating, no relationship, no
marriage. Nothing. Certainly not boyfriend-girlfriend or "husband-wife". We're just too different
of a pair of people. I bet she never even talks about me anymore. There was a time I might have
been able to hit that. Not anymore. There's a public image of us being together, but that's a sham.

On the plus side, my comic isn't the worst comic out there. My sequential art is better than the
work of quite a few other sequential artists in my competition.
The Bad News; It's still far from perfect. I've got a while to go until I ever become master. At
least another five years of steady work routine.
What would happen if Sin City: The Dame to Kill For, Powers: Who Killed Retro Girl, and
Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles Issue 1 got combined. But it was the length of Infinite Kung-Fu
from Top Shelf. Integrated. Hybridized? That would be cool. And throw in all this light saber
streaks I've been working on. That there would be one kick-ass comic. I'll get to mapping the
visual-novelization compositions down pretty soon. I'm not worried about my comic being good
enough. It's already "good enough", but it can always get better. And it will, as long as I keep
working and improving on it. I'm going to add another 50 pages to the 53 I've already done. I
want to get so good at comics not a day goes by when I'm not wrestling with a daily sequential
art composition.
Also, there's no acknowledge America-specific market for independent black and white actionadventure comics for mature readers. There have been some lone solo attempts at it, but
surprisingly most people don't consider it an industry yet. I'm building it. It's a niche industry,

P a g e | 1120

full of Marvs, n' Ninja Turtles, n' Samurai Rabbits, n' Fone Bones, n' Disposable Assassins, n'
Judge Dredds, n' Batmans, n' Deana Pilgrims, n' Ranting Aardvarks, n' Tank Girls. Bullets, Guns,
n' Blood, and all that good noir jazz.

Saturday, October 4th, 2014, 12:16 p.m.,

To me, indie comic books are like magic books. The best comic books are enchanted. They
enchanted books. They have a soul and are alive. Everytime you open the book to a page, you
can feel the book come alive. No wonder I was working so hard on a graphic novel. On a
symbolic level, I was trying to create a living book. Or at the very least, a living world and
ecosystem WITHIN a book
I have a great support system outside of my family: Phil, the Hesses, Nicole, social media, TV,
the 2 Seths, Titmouse, CN, Adult Swim, ASMB, Twitter, My online female partners (sort of, but
not in any in person regard. I've never met them), YouTube, Hollywood, Otomo, Japan, Anime,
China, Hong Kong. And the like. This is a nice counterweight to all the parental abuse my
parents want to force on me.
But yes, it's important to have a good support system outside of your parents. And the bigger it
is, the better.

I'm an honest person. An honest man. I don't lie. To anyone. Ever. I've only lied a few times, but
it was for survival, not to cheat others like some people use lying for.

Monday, October 6th, 2014, 3:24 p.m.,

I might have set a world record, for youngest writer and author to finish a 1,000 page long
manuscript series. I've contacted the Guinness World Records to verify if this suspicion is true. I
do set the world record for writing and authorship, I'll be treated the same way anyone who sets a
world record does, with a plaque and write up, and the media and press might want to follow my
story.
As the world's youngest author of a 4,000 page book series, my schedule is not as jam-packed as
my official title would suggest.
My Legacy: I will one day be a writer, author, screenwriter, and cartoonist of note.
By the time we get to the end of the first handful of decades of the 2000s....when time slowed.
I will be known as....

P a g e | 1121

One of the most prolific remaining writer-authors of the First Quarter of the 21st Century.

If there is one pleasure I have left in life, it is beating the shit out of Cary. So far I've beat him up
4 to 5 times. Each time he attempts to assault me, I knock his ass flat on the ground as a
response. Twice.
Jules
"Shut the fuck up fat man! This ain't none of your goddamn business!"

Oddly enough he only wants to call the police when I beat HIM up. Never when he tries to beat
ME up. Sometimes I even wish I would beat the shit out of his mouth so bad I'd finally cripple
and/or kill him, promptly ending his "Reign of Floridian Terror".
The internet isn't the safest or most positive of influence. As a matter of fact, the internet has
always and will continue to be somewhat of a negative influence on people's lives. It's disruptive
and not always selfless, benevolent, or peaceful. Sometimes it's too competitive and filled with
negative energy that is a hindrance to hard work. Also there is lot of secret conspiratorial activity
happening in the lesser known communities online, the more controversial-infamous ones, like
hackers, vigilantes, bullies, and pornographers.

P a g e | 1122

P a g e | 1123

Chapter16

P a g e | 1124

Tuesday, October 7th, 2014, 9:48,

It's never easy being a late-bloomer in an industry driven by youth. But the comic
book industry is one of the hardest industries to be a late-bloomer in. The novel
writing industry is more for older people.
I'm falling behind in my drawing. AGAIN! After the excessive assignments from
lessons, not surprisingly, once I fell out of contact with my teacher, I fell behind.
He wanted me to draw at a level he can't even match up with himself. It felt wrong
to me, like I was working for a guy who's a perfectionist that can't even draw
himself. I guess I thought his classes could help me more than they actual did in
reality, but I did walk away with one thing. An ability to put a lot of hours into my
comics.
Unfortunately, in terms of starting my career in comics later and being a late
bloomer
My businesses have brought me a little bit of newly acquired power. Feels good.
Joe C.E.O., the Mobile Action Pro.
It feels good not having to rely on Adult Swim or Cartoon Network for fame or
power. I'm finally establishing an identity outside of their arena of control,
probably to their frustration, which actually makes me happy. I wasn't even in my
house for most of today. It was a four hour car trip to Cocoa and back, but with my
business, thanks to algorithms, I don't have to be there to operate the master control
room, the user interface 24/7. I was gone for what was probably 4 hours, and my
business was operating at home without me. Thank God for Algorithms and
modern technology, which apparently I'm an expert at. I'm like Homer Simpson
working at a Nuclear Power Plant, where he has no idea what he's doing, complete
idiot, yet he's always saving the day. I'm not an idiot like that, but I am
incompetent at a lot of more formal duties. Not that that affliction matters
anymore. I compensate for my lack of knowhow for what I can't do by
compensating with what I can. And somehow life goes really well for me.
Man...Maybe I should still consider submitting my series bible to AS. I just wish
they didn't play around so much. All this sarcasm is enough to kill a man. But I'm

P a g e | 1125

sure if they say something such as "The End of the World Will
Happen...Eventually". I have hope that the world will end one fine day. LOL!
Adult Swim Digital and Games
c/o Game Submission
1065 Williams Street
Atlanta, Georgia 30309
So, I've got to draft another cover letter for my new [AS] submission. I have my
little self-published booklet with my series premise. And I'll soon have the cover
letter and permission waiver

I could be in a lot of trouble if Appy Pie does get its ass in gear with its payment
program. If they don't do what they said they'd do originally, that could get me into
a lot of deep shit. Appy Pie is why you shouldn't trust businesses. They will cheat.
They'll cheat YOU. Well, them and anime. It's a bad idea to think an Asian (i.e.
Indian) company would ever come through like they claimed they would on the
economic aspect of things.
That online speech interview video I heard and saw online from the retweet of one
of my favorite underground cartoonists of all time [Jim Mahfood] (Zombie Kid,
Tank Girl, Marijuana Man, Disco Destroyer, the last two of which I still need to
check out), was an awesome interview. I learned a lot about Jim's life and career
and art by watching that. Like how eventually you gotta make the jump, and also
how all your accumulated loves, interests, and influences make up your original
style over time. I also learned why Jim doesn't draw like his Renaissance Clerks /
Zombie Kid period anymore. He wanted to move on from modeling everything
after Jamie Hewlett. I always suspected that was one of the things he really loved,
but I had no idea he felt so guilty about "ripping Tank Girl off" in his own mind. I
never view it that way. In many ways I do the same thing to Sin City, something
people accuse me of all the time. Not that I ever gave a fuck about that element.
I'm not JUST copying Frank Miller. I view it as more Frank Miller and Bruce
Timm manga and anime than anything else. Jim, like myself and Phil, is also a big
voucher for the "do your own thing" mentality.

P a g e | 1126

Probably one of the most valuable insights I got out of his video was "Style as
Brand". I don't mean to obsess over Jim in this venue the way I did over Steve and
Jhonen at one point, but I often feel indebted to my favorite cartoonists and
animators worldwide, but especially nationally, in that they drive me to keep
reaching higher.

Saturday, September, October 11th, 2014, 9:33 p.m.,

Most masterpieces, in nearly every medium of art or literature or media, are
channeled.
Channeling art (comics, scripts, novels, books) should come easily, with little
struggle, It flows from the soul, not from the bank account. You should feel like
you can do it forever for free for the rest of your life, easily, as a joy, not a job or
divine punishment. I can do that with my journals. I just need to learn to channel
my creative, structurally sound work in books and comics.
I'm going to make a list of channelers. People like Jodorowsky and Otomo and
Sim, and Asimov, and Stephen King.
I've spent far too much time battling doppelgangers and evil twins (Omens of
Death), than I have refining my creative channeling abilities. Lately I've been
showboating the art thing too much. That's not spiritually natural to publish every
last detail and fabric. I mean, yeah, it's good I'm finally able to draw again and
draw well again after a few day long dry spell (if only temporarily), but how long
will this luck with natural art last. Art created on natural impulse. Not just
something to be a "portfolio of my career" to show off to people. Art shouldn't be
about public declarations and showing off. It should be closer to Journaling.
After 4-6 days of nonstop suffering, the sufferings over as I got back to drawing
just today this morning.

P a g e | 1127

Sunday, October 12th, 2014, 9:03,

I hate how the Japanese intelligentsia are only willing to work with famous people.
I hate how the Japanese create a barrier to foreigners, writers, people who can do
spotting of blacks, and non-famous people. Unless you have Japanese citizenship
or a famous person (both of which come with a hefty price), they spit on and kick
dirt in your face, no matter HOW much you want to work with the Japanese in
Japan. The one exception of only a few, being America fan ABe.

Monday, October 13, 2014, 4:20 p.m.

I'm a huge player in online and digital broadcast media now, for better or worse,
like it or not, I'm there.
I have my own so-called "regular" TV channel now, thanks to Roku.
I have a lot of things now...
I have...

My
My
My
My
My

own
own
own
own
own

Website, (ActionToonTV.com)
mobile app (ActionToonTV Live)
YouTube Channels
Ustream Channel
Underground TV Channel (Roku: Nowhere Stream / Ustream)

Today, October (10) 13th, marks the discovery/launch of my first ever On-Air Live
Traditional TV Channel, ActionToonTV, courtesy of Ustream, Roku, and the
Nowhere Stream Roku Channel.
Speaking as a Tech and Media Entrepreneur, this is a very exciting time for me. I
like how anonymous the internet underground TV industry is. Gives you all kinds
of freedom.
I'm on TV, too, bitches. And that's just the way I like it. Thank you, Roku. Now
anyone can watch ActionToonTV on their television set, as long as they have a
Roku Streaming Media Console. I believe my linear live streaming animation
channel playback is one of the first of its kind, first to cross over, from a website to

P a g e | 1128

a Video-On-Demand Streaming TV Channel and back again. I'm very happy about
this breakthrough.
Here is where it's safe to conduct work...

DLNA (Serviio, Plex, HDMI)

Roku
TV (roku)
Apps
Admob
Kindle Digital Press
Adsense
YouTube
Blogger
G+
Twitter
Smartphone
LG Electronics
Streaming Media (Video)
In Video Ads
Google Play
Amazon
Amazon Kindle
Cartoon Network LIVE
Adult Swim TV [astv]
DVD Ripping
Amazon Studio
Writers Guild East
Tom Hart
Tumblr
Google Search
Marvel
Disney
Todd McFArlane

P a g e | 1129

LucasFilm
Paramount
My House
US Bank, Bank of America (Storage Facilities)
Walgreens
Publix
Wendy's
Books a Million
The City of Eustis
ODesk
Cary Alberts (The Grumpy Guardian Hank Hill-Esque Financial Provider)
Visa (The Independent Financial Provider)
Fidelity (Where I invest in the market)
Paypal
Titmouse, Dreamworks, Williams Street, Toonami (The Wingmen)

2nd Hand Places to avoid The Not So Safe:

DA
ASMB
CN
Adult Swim
ANN
MegaTokyo Forums
Wikipedia
Time Warner
Viacom
Fox

------------------------------------------------I'm going to start using websites and especially Wikipedia to guide me through the
reading of the more high end classic novels, as a strategy guide to approaching my
reading comprehension. Spoiler Alert!
First Stop: The mad mad world of James Joyce's Ulysses.

P a g e | 1130

Okay, so I'm reading two books so far, might read more. Frankenstein and Ulysses.
Reflecting on these books' writing style makes me reflect on my own writing
voice. And at one point I got to thinking:
What elements do I want and choose to convey more than other elements with
words on paper, through my outlets of literature?

Atmosphere (John Steinbeck, Ridley Scott)

Attire (Todd McFarlane, Batman, Frank Miller)
Psyche (Jack Kerouac, Ken Wilber, Carl Jung, Joseph Campbell)
Feelings (Leiji Matsumoto, Savin Yeatman-Eiffel)
Action (Tarantino, Otomo, John Woo, Yuen Woo-Ping, George Lucas)

Jhonen Vasquez writes like Victor Frankenstein, like some cuckoo batshit mad
scientist. That tone of cold analysis and warm humane friendly humor. I think it's
on purpose.
Getting a lot of rain today and tomorrow, but at the same time there's a lot of
construction going on right outside my house in a Northern and Southern
Direction. Roadwork right in my front and backyard. But hey, at least it's
something to do, watch the road construction and heavy lifting from my office
window. If there's a few things you can count on in Casselberry, regardless of
weather, it's road construction, the postal service, and the power company (for the
times when the power goes out). There's also fast food downtown, but drive
through can get crowded during weekdays at rush hour, and sometimes people
really literally hate waiting in the car for their lunch and dinner. I don't know why
it makes local residents so impatient, but sometimes fast food brings out the most
impatient people. Maybe it's because of the misleading Title. People around here
think fast food automatically means the food you paid for gets to you "fast"
because it's called Fast Food, but the title is deceptive. Truth be told, a more apt
title for the drive through is Slow Food. Delicious, but Slow. Sometimes people
have to learn to have patience and wait for things, like they're lunch and dinner out
in public, but often they don't wait patiently.

P a g e | 1131

Wednesday, October 15th, 2014,

You know, simple, fun, and active prose isn't always bad, and it doesn't have to be
childish. My recent writing, Crimson Valley, is full of fun simple description. I
really enjoyed reading it. I felt as though I could write a whole novel that way.
Guinness World Records sent me an email a few days ago, verifying they received
the entry for my possible literary world record of most prolific young author (17
years old, 1,300+ pages, 2001)
You'll never make it to the top of a hierarchy, of a hierarchical system made by
someone else. It's like casinos. You're not gonna win at those because YOU
DON'T OWN THEM. And you never did to begin with. That's the whole point of
being an entrepreneur, to do your own thing.

Thursday, October 16th, 2014,

My name is Joseph Matthew Alberts.
I am an American. I'm also a North-African-Arab Eurasian-American. I'm the only
member of my kind that exists that I know about. I have potentially direct ancestry
and undiscovered lineage in North Africa, Europe, Asia, and North America.
I have a new goal in life:
My Goal is to be
the Most Prolific Writer-Artist-Creator
The most prolific Illustrator-Cartoonist-Screenwriter-Novelist
And to never stop World-Building the Setting and History of New-Earth.
So far I'm not really having a problem with it. I'm channeling pretty much all my
writing now. Now it's Art's turn. Ideally I'd like to work as a medium channeling
all my professional work, like the graphite No. 2 pencil and Notan illustrations I've
done

P a g e | 1132

In terms of Building up the material and 1000s of pages necessary to meet my

career goals (and believe me, those both end and begin, they both stop and start
here and now, right at this table, and 2 other rooms, right in this house)....in order
to meet those career goals of longevity, in this very same house I'm going to be
producing 3 very distinct formatted page styles:

Comic Book Pages (Comics of all sorts)

Fiction and Novel Pages (writing)
Script Pages (TV/Film)
98% of the work is "showing up to work"

To get the water to flow from the faucet, the faucet must first be on.
I've done enough work on scripts, novels, and comics to feel contented, almost like
I could finally die happy, if I wanted to. And even though I have a lot of time and a
lot of work left to go, I'm in a good position.
I have a triple threat portfolio - Script, Novel, Comic. Now I have to keep adding
onto that work and eventually present my work to agents, editors, and producers
who would be interested in seeing and critiquing it. That's kind of the whole point
of doing this much work. The hope it will get you hired somewhere. That is what
the refinement process is for.
To be honest, working this way, in an atmosphere like this to get to this point, was
like crawling and digging my way through shit, dirt, and mud in raggedy clothes
without a shower, through a storm drain to escape a penitentiary, to finally emerge
8 miles away from jail with sunlight, god, and green grass on the other side, away
from the warden, guards, and inmates on the inside of darkness, blackness, and sin.
It's over.

P a g e | 1133

Friday, October 17th, 2014, 4:43 p.m.,

The Magic of "The ..."
Often, good fiction, good novels, and good short stories start with the word "The".

The House on Haunted Hill

The Ocarina of Time
The Tree of Life
The Setting Sun
The Vast Valley on the Horizon
The Cemetery mid-morning

...Not all stories need a "the", but it helps, especially in terms of figuring out how
to get started.
Story, Narrative, Shorts, and Novel Starters
"The" - adjective ("The", "To The", "In The", "From The", "By The", "When
The")
"It" - Pronoun Intro ("It was late at night when", "It was less than an hour to go
until the car reached the state line." "It had not yet begun to rain on this cold
Tuesday evening"
"Names" - Introductions, Verb Phrases, Brief Backstories ("When Phil Arrived
At The", "By the time Ron got to the..."
"I, He, She, They, My, His, Her" - First, second, third person Pronoun
sentence," - Pronouns, using sentences that start like "When I agreed to"... "or I
arrived at the crime scene at", "I arrived at the house at 2:45", etc.)
"Dialogue" - Speech and Communication ("Did you see something back there?
Said Harold Malcolm." "Oh God! What are you doing! Danielle screamed"

P a g e | 1134

On writing about bad things that happen in real life in relation to you writing One way or another, bad things are going to happen. Bad people will almost
always plot bad things every so often. Someone, somewhere will choose the wrong
option, or choose to do a bad thing, and as a writer, in reality you have very little
control over that, whether or not people choose to simply throw their life away.
You may as well write and please yourself regardless of anyone else's actions. As a
writer, unlike politicians, military, or police, you don't control other people.
I'm an on again, off again Zen Buddhist.
Between 2000-2002 I was a pretty active practitioner.
But I fell out of practice for the following 12 years, now I'm practicing again. Now
I know why I never had sex when I was writing my first two books. I was a
practicing Buddhist. All those years following 2000-2002 were trauma and PTSD
Post Traumatic Stress Disorder, recovery from basically being destroyed by
Florida, the media, therapy, and Brian Johnston. It was tough to focus. The
moment I recovered I became a chronic masturbator, which would explain my
absence from a religion like Buddhism. The new found freedom caused me to get
distracted again. For a short time I traded in enlightenment for orgasms, which
sounds a lot worse than it feels.

P a g e | 1135

Monday, October 20thh, 2014,

Digital Video List: Watching List:

Roku
Netflix
DirecTV
Adult Swim TV
CN LIVE
Naruto.com
Funimation.com
YouTube
DVD Collection
Rip Collection
Pirate Bay
DVD Wallet
ActionToonTV
Toon Goggles
Pokemon TV
Crunchy Roll
Anime News Network

Tuesday, October 21st, 2014,

Just found out today I made 6 million impressions or views on Google Adwords. If
you're not a bully, or Hitler, success will eventually come to you. But almost never
as expected.
For instance, I never would have assumed I'd reach 6 million online views while
still being stuck at my parents house with no money, or at least not for the most
part. I had $2,000 at one point, but it was from credit, not from the 6 million views.
And I never would have guessed how gray and decaying almost every in person
one and thing around me in my neighborhood would be when I reached that level.
Kind of a little depressing to see so much failure magnetizing toward my success.

P a g e | 1136

In other words, it's not a linear path, and there's often no higher logic to it. Success
is a fickle heckle. It's all in your mind, bro! woowoowoo oooh! Scary, right?
I'm now officially a powerful online marketer.
I have a marketing audience of 6 million.
I just got to make sure all this power granted by 6 million views on a adwords
business (that belongs to Google, the world's second most valuable brand).....
I just need to make sure all that power doesn't go to my head.
Because of the technical and strategic complexity involved in the act of running
my online TV channel, it's really cut down on the competition. I keep the market
friendly and open to just a few lucky people besides myself. Most people have no
clue how to run an online cartoon channel. That means I would estimate I've
cornered the market on anime TV channels. My ads have seen by the widest
amount of people, for one thing. I like using my intelligence to corner the online
market with my small business.
Wednesday, October 22nd, 2014, 11:25 a.m.,
I read the Orlando Sentinel. According to an article, politicians are lobbying to get
Florida turned into 2 states, North Florida, South Florida (i.e. Carolina, Virginia).
Seminole County is considered North Florida compared to the article, so that
means I live near the potential state line. Casselberry, Seminole County, North
Florida. That sounds awesome. Cary's hatin' on it like he hates on global warming
lobbyists and Obama, so that means it must be the right answer. Seriously. Cary is
always wrong. He has the opposite of good lucrative intuition. I have good
intuition. He doesn't.
I got 6 million views and I'm living on a potential Northern State Line. I couldn't
be happier!

P a g e | 1137

Potential Roommates to replace Cary/Peggy Requirements: Smart, Kind, Compassionate, Friendly, have an extra room or two
handy.

Chris Hess
Jean Hess
Jo Ann Borgious
Ann Stack
Richard Stack
Beth Hicks
Sis Meyer
Daryl Meyer
Karen Almond
Phil Ferretti
Alona
Jen Almond
Jonny Bartlett

Thursday, October 23rd, 2014, 7:05 p.m.,

I'm happy with my professional life.
I wear three hats. I run three companies, all of which I founded.
Thunder-Lightning Publishing (A literary publishing company)
StreamWave Media (An Application Software Developer company)
ActionToonTV (An online broadcast network live streaming animation app
and website)
Number of employees, besides me: 2
Years in existence: 1-2

P a g e | 1138

Well, I think my social dream came true.

I wanted to have European and Asian friends and now I do!
And I even have 2 employees who are Asian.

Daike (Beijing)
Richard Hong
ABe Yoshitoshi (Japan)
Thomas Romain (France, Japan)
Raynart (France, Japan)
Alona (Europe)

I think I've always been drawn to Asians and Europeans because we click. We get
along famously. I understand their way of thinking on a more intuitive, instinctual
level.

Friday, October 24th, 2014, 1:20 p.m.,

Gnosis, Creative and Spiritual Gnosticism
Medium as artist
I'm a little unknowing about this new path of knowledge I'm traveling. I'm seeking
and walking a secret path of knowledge that's largely unexplored. My current
fascination, fixation, and area of focus, is using art, design, and creative and
surrealistic illustration, mythology, and archetypal design as a form of expression
and channeling as a medium.
Where could this channeling becoming from:
The spirit realm
An extraterrestrial realm
The Universe and Cosmos

P a g e | 1139

Christianity
Judaism
Hinduism
Islam
Buddhism
Zen Buddhism
Taoism
Mysticism
The Bible
The Kabbalah
Jerusalem
Gnosticism
Romanticism
Expressionism
Goth
Paganism
Satanism
Europe
Asia
Tibet
Monks
Priests
God
Jesus Christ
Metal Music
Black
Dark
Soul
Meditation
Wicca
Tarot Cards
Clairvoyance
Clairsentience

P a g e | 1140

Reincarnation
Saturday, October 25th, 2014, 2:42 p.m.,
I'm now a Microsoft Partner. After filling out a form, I'm now in the Microsoft ISV
(independent software vendor/developer) program.
I could be building software for Microsoft! Oh hell yes!
Technology Big ITN (in the news):
Streaming TV to Computers (FCC vs NAB (nat. association. broadcasters)
lawsuit)
Streaming Computers to TV (Roku IPO)
Streaming and general interest in smartphones (Android, iOS iPhone)
Microsoft pursuing the smartphone market (Nokia purchase)
From this point on, in one sense, it's My Life As A Microsoft ISV. My friend and
employee from Beijing, Daike, could and very likely will be my Microsoft CoPartner in the building, planning, manufacturing, prototyping, and implementation
of our potential Microsoft applications we're developing. I'm still deciding whether
it will be an actual finished product, or a technological scientific system to license
and exploit. For now, I'm kind of leading the way. I'm guiding Daike through this
complex scientific and technological (but very fun) strategic negotiation process.
Getting paid the big bucks for a product of my mind would be a dream come true.

P a g e | 1141

I like to collect professional social contacts:

By way of Twitter and LinkedIn, my social network now includes the following
people:
Twitter Social Contacts:
Barack Obama, Yoshitoshi ABe, Thomas Romain, Neil Gaiman, Stephen King,
Bruce Lee Legacy, Jhonen Vasquez, Marilyn Manson, The Rock, Todd McFarlane,
Seth MacFarlane, Seth Green, Dave Filoni, Bryan Cranston, Rob Paulsen, Ralph
Bakshi, John Kricfalusi, Chris Prynoski, Lea Hernandez, Jenny R. Goldberg,
Thurop Van Orman, Matthew Senreich, Tara Strong, JJ Villard, Steve Blum,
Lance Heiskell, Jamie S. Rich, Lex Lang, Doug TenNapel, Jimmy Palmiotti, Roger
Clark (Vibe), Dave Willis, Kevin Eastman, Man of Action, James Arnold Taylor,
Nas, Damon Albarn, Ted Naifeh, Serena Valentino, Thom Yorke, Liquid TV
LinkedIn Business Contacts:
Brian Rifkin, Stefano Colonna, Mary Harrington, Kevin Manthei, Mark Dinan,
Eric Calderon, Jeff Scheetz, Sheri Shelton, Yoshiya Ayugai, Larry Perez, Alison
Mann, Takeshi "Tom" Ogawa, Aaron Albert, Etienne Rugeri, Jason Stiff,
Christophere Brake, Antoni Canobbio, Ben Kalina, Ramin Zahed, Alex Soto, MJ
Offen, Michael Maurer, Steven Daily, Justin Ridge, Aimee Norman, Chris
Prynoski, Oliver Guse, Christopher Higginson, Carlos Ramos, Nichole Goluskin,
Jody Schaeffer, Dan Vado, Abs Girdhar, Deenesh Raaj, Jodi Downs, Peter
Hannan, Nicholas Atlan, Zahir Abbas, Thomas Romain, Phil Ferretti, Ken G
Brook, Brooke Pettengill, Jared Deal, Rob Carr, Mark Gamesi, Rajeev Jha, Donald
Christian, Shigetaka Mochizuki, Cindy Beatty, Daryl Meyer, Sora Takeuchi,
Yukiko Yeatman-Eiffel, Arnaud Baudry, Corey Jackson, Lakshmi Kanth, Clara
Lamert, Lena Galant, Danielle Johnson, John Salvitti, Tabraiz Jawed, Roelyn
Gabonada

P a g e | 1142

Oh, the things I'm going to do with all my money, my hundreds of thousands of
dollars I'm going to make as an ISV Silicon Valley deal. Sweet, sweet money and
moolah.

Guinness Book of World Records

ActionToonTV
Streamwave Media
Microsoft ISV
Kindle Press
Thunder-Lightning Publishing
The App Industry
The Smartphone Industry
Indie Self-Publishing
The 6 million ad impressions with banner ads

The Key question here is, How can I make money with each of these things? I
want in.
Though he was born 1 year after me, I still wish to one day become the financial
licensing royalty equivalent of the Mark Zuckerberg of video software and mobile
streaming video apps. I want to be Anthony Wood & Mark Zuckerberg, except I'll
be employed by Microsoft. I hope to help Microsoft fix its smartphone market
woes. I think the Nokia purchase is a step in the right direction. It matters how they
brand it and how compatible it is with the Android and iPhone dominated markets.
Popular celebrities I share a similar birth year with:

Aziz Ansari
Mila Kunis
Mark Zuckerberg
Christopher Paolini

But yeah, my birthday is really sneaking up on me.

P a g e | 1143

In order to become a professional artist, you have to be 100% into creating art. You
have to be devoted on three levels: Body, Mind, and Soul. My mind and part of my
soul were there, but not my body and soul, or even body-mind. Mentally, I was
there, but not physically. I was never able to make a habit out of it. Now I'm just a
book and comic book art collector. More than I could ever be an artist. I still draw,
but now that I'm on the verge of new employment, I don't know if my life will ever
be the same again. Some big changes in the works. I can still write (sort of), so I
can still do stories and scripts and whatnot, and work on freelanced or franchised
story based projects. But being a fully realized writer takes almost as much out of
you as comic book illustration does.
I suspect this feeling I have right now. This lonely sense of isolation and
achievement, may stay with me my whole life. That is what manic-depression is.
Chances are, I'll probably be sitting around in a big half-empty house, sitting
around, counting millions of dollars worth of money my whole life. My money.
I'm going to be a count, in a mansion, who sits around counting his millions upon
millions of dollar bills in his bank account all day. More lonely than it sounds. But
that is what it is like to be a loner. I like money, and I like being alone, ungoverned
and unburdened by neighborly annoyance, medical intrusion, or parental authority,
ever again.
Cuz I GOTS dat money.
And I gonnas gits dat money!
Ah'ight?!

P a g e | 1144

Chapter 17

P a g e | 1145

Sunday, October 26th, 2014,

Okay, so apparently my dad has at least one or a few behavioral and personality
disorders. Aside from being a potential gluton, sociopath, and genuine antisocial
family member, I've deduced he shows signs of being an ODD (oppositional
defiant disorder). His constant attempts to medicate and institutionalize me merely
for annoying him is the perfect example of the root of his behavior problems. Him
shifting the blame away from his easily annoyed and constantly angry, hateful self.
This man does not like adults. Ever since I became an adult he essentially
disowned me. He's annoyed by me quite easily, and constantly wants and tries to
act and be annoying himself. It's going to be incredibly difficult to get him to fess
up to his disabilities and disorders. He's got some serious mental and behavioral
issues, disturbances, and genuine problems.
Chances are, feeling indebted to those who inspire and encourage us, mostly just
gets in the way of our own independence, and originality.
Most if not all people will never get rich attempting to blaze someone else's trail.
Trailblazer means you're blazing your own trail, not your impression or mind's eye
vision of someone else's, even someone who may be a hero or idol to you. In other
words, sometimes it's not just style that's difficult to copy, it's the entire genre and
medium. One person ends up doing one medium or genre, and then all the people
in that genre spend the rest of their careers playing catch up for all the recorded
history of that medium. I was blinded to this too, initially. I wanted to BE Jhonen
Vasquez, or Todd McFarlane, or Dave Sim. But I was really just mindlessly
following their example, the likes of which they are already good at and
accustomed to in a way I could never hope to let alone learn to become.
To succeed, you have to be the One Original. You Have to be the First. You have
to be the Founder of the medium. You have to do a lot of soul searching and a lot
of failing in the things you're not so good at to eventually discover whatever it is
you're truly a gifted master at, and whatever it is that you know how to do. But
once you do find you're industry niche, chances are if you give yourself some time,
you too can be one of the greats.
That's kind of the thing. Everyone in animation is hoping to be the next big leader.
The next Walt Disney or Osamu Tezuka, and be the anime alpha dog, the main

P a g e | 1146

leader. But if your name isn't Walt Disney, or Osamu Tezuka, or maybe even
Windsor McCay, truth is, you're a follower. You're not a leader. No one is who
didn't create the whole thing, the whole industry. And that can take up to a century
to happen. It can take up to a century to be one of the Founders. It's like planting
the seed of a tree. It takes a very, very long time. A Century or half a century, to be
exact.
I do foresee one element of the future though. Since I'm stuck here and won't be
escaping or dying anytime soon, all of the future symbols of my success that have
yet to happen...will happen here, right here, at this computer or through the mail.
That's the only way any good news or major achievements reach me anymore. Not
an corporate workplace, and not at school. Right here, in this house I've been living
in where everything else happened. True. Lots of bad stuff happened and happens
here, but it's competing with the good revolutionary stuff, like YouTube and Arab
Spring and Obama 2012. I'll get paid here as well. And I'll eat future meals here. I
don't foresee it happening anywhere other than right here. After all, both good and
bad, I literally have nowhere else to be and nowhere else to go. Deal.
I traded in any remaining remnants of popularity or a "successful" social life for
the sciences a long time ago. I am a man of science. Not necessarily a scientist.
Just a man really in love with technological science. I prefer my science to nearly
any relationship I've ever been in. It's gotten more difficult to rely on my friends to
keep me occupied. I love my friends, but actual time spent with those people is
rare.
Drawing sucks. I hate it. A lot. I went a long time without saying it. But yeah.
Drawing. It sucks and I hate it with a passion, because it becomes impossible long
after it stops being fun in high school. I'm considering hanging up the towel and
retiring from drawing. I can't imagine it being that much of a shift. I'll be an art and
anime world has-been, but I'm fine with that.
I hate many things about drawing and art, not least of which is the Arrogant SelfAbsorbed Pretensions of the people who produce it as amateurs and professionals
for the most part, be they white or Asian. And especially young and female.

P a g e | 1147

I think I'd rather be tortured at Guantanamo Bay with needles and buzz saws and
water boarding than draw or upload any art online or to social media in the
foreseeable future.
That's obvious to me now. Drawings hard, torturous work.
I lucked out as in my home is right here. I'm lucky in that I don't need art to make a
living or survive. Survival and Career are no longer linked in my mind. It's
doubtful a situation like that would happen in the next 10 or 20 years where I'd
need to consider my own survival. I've got a good 10 or 20 years of simple living
to do until the survival thing even becomes an issue, and there is a high likelihood
I'll have found a better vocation by then.
My current hero is a tech inventor: Anthony Wood. Inventor of the DVR. He's
famous like me, but he doesn't have the fame to show for it either...just like me! No
Time Magazine or Forbes Magazine article, no Wikipedia page. No nothing. Yet
he's contributed so much to the world. He's doing it exactly how I hope to in the
near future.
I don't want to get written up by Time or Animation Magazine.
I want to get a write up by Forbes, TechCrunch-Crunchbase, Entrepreneur, the
Houston Chronicle. Okay, and maybe have something I invent get written about by
Time or The New York Times.
Achievement talk: By the time I was 31, I had invented 20 patentable tech ideas,
nearly all of which I planned to build at some point, once I got the backing, team,
and funding.
Now to make one of those ideas turn into something, I'm currently outlining a
business proposal on behalf of my company, which is going to get submitted to a
large publicly traded brand name tech companies.
Okay, I started writing, drafting, and finished writing the final draft of my
corporate business proposal with one of the World's 5 Biggest Tech and IT
Companies.

P a g e | 1148

Tuesday, October 28th, 2014,

My career dream is to build technology for Silicon Valley, from the comfort of my
Casselberry home in collaboration with my 2 overseas employees, until they pay
me enough to be able to afford to drive cross country and relocate.
Then, maybe, after I've made a career for myself in Silicon Valley, California, I
might try to make a name for myself in comics, TV, and/or Hollywood. But I'll be
in my mid 40s before any of this happens.

Wednesday, October 29th, 2014,

Looking back. Now that I'm pretty much retired from comics, I do look back on the
times I spent drawing, fondly. For the most part. I don't miss the criticism. But I do
kind of miss the process. Too bad drawing professionally is such an online-social
nightmare, dealing with all those maladjusted nerds and social misfits.
New Title:
Letting Go of the Artist I Once Was
Embracing the Writer, Scientist, and Master Builder I Now Am

So I go an email a few hours ago, informing me that the Microsoft Executive

Offices reviewed my business proposal, and made the decision my development
company's technology is not one they wish to acquire at this moment in time. I
think I'm going to give myself credit for trying.

P a g e | 1149

Thursday, October 30th, 2014,

"Who's less influential and powerful than me?"
Interesting question. With the influence of streaming video, by now I'd have to say
"pretty much everyone".

In terms of employment, if I can't work at home, invent and create the field of
work, and do what I want in my sketchpads and word processor or on a website,
and get paid for that...if I can't do any of those things, it's not a job I want or could
probably ever have even if I wanted the job, which I don't. I'm about niches, unique
innovations, micro-monopolies, and branding.

November 1st, 2014, 8:29 p.m.,

I'm falling behind on everything: Drawing, novels, reading, uploading, ripping,
watching, short stories, screenwriting, cleaning, hygiene. But Dad's the fuse. The
downward spiral that often follows is the real killer.
I'm going to need a fresh start. I need sharpies and my lucky gems and money, and
power, and the strength from Lord Satan! And Heavy Metal!
I found out my most recent and possibly last art teacher was openly transgender. It
was hard to explain, but I'm too prideful to take instruction from a man who can't
even get his own sexual identity straight. Gross. I don't know if that makes me
homophobic, but he/she was even weirder than Nicole, a natural she. I was too
afraid my teacher's sexual preference of being a woman who really used to be a
man would taint my record of drawing naturally feminine females. Yeah, this is
getting to weird for me. Tom Hart wasn't much better. Everything I liked he didn't
and everything he liked I didn't. Truth is nowadays it's unreasonable to go up to
someone, approach them from afar and ask them to teach their art secrets to you. I
miss Phil's temperament. These newer teachers get worse and worse.
Ugh. Sometimes I wish there wasn't so much noise, idiocy, and dark-hearted idiocy
in this world. It's all incredibly annoying. Just a tsunami of annoyance. IS there a

P a g e | 1150

place to go to get away from all of this? A place to escape to? A safe world of
peace and quiet, with no hecklers, haters, or people who envy your power and
charisma?
My birth mother, Mary Gaynor, died only a week or two after she got to speak
with me for the first time in her life. I heard some of her last dying words on the
phone before she passed away a week or so later.
I feel like I bet Jhonen would have felt in 2001, or how Todd McFarlane felt in
1995, or how John Lasseter felt in 1999. Or how Katsuhiro Otomo felt in the 80s
and 90s with AKIRA. Like there is no competition. There's no one you're really
competing against. Just yourself. Only yourself
Industry? Comics and book industry?? There is no comics and book industry
anymore. Just me and TV, much like Akira Toriyama, and his Dragon Ball Z. But
Dragon Ball Z was produced a long time ago.

Tuesday, November 4th, 2014,

Eureka. And Inspiration hits. Lighting Strikes Again.
Damn I'm good, says Duke Nukem.
What would happen if:
I make my script longer?
And I make my Literary Fiction, Shorter?
Instead of writing TV shows scripts, I can upgrade to feature film
screenplays.
And instead of attempting (and failing) to write novels, I can write
short stories for the rest of my life, and maybe a novella or two.
Writing Movies, Writing Short Stories.
And then I turn them all into an Anthology.
The Art of the Anthology

P a g e | 1151
Johnny the Homicidal Maniac is an anthology series, because Jhonen has
a short attention span, clearly. Almost all epic length comics and
graphic novels end up being trade paperback, and/or individual issue
anthologies. Now that I think about it and recognize the power of the
publishing Anthology Format, the more empowered I feel to dabble and
experiment in it.
Just work on a longer narrative in short primarily self contained
bursts. Relay race INSTEAD of a Marathon!
Anthologized quasi-serial literary and visual
narratives may just be my savior after all! Eureka!

cinematic-literary

I didn't notice it all initially, but the majority of media (internet,

TV, Movies, Animation, Novels, Fiction, Comic Books) is anthologies.
Meaning its narrative is often incremental, and has numerous, if not
many starting and stopping points.

Current anthologized author influences?

Japanese author Yoshihiro Tatsumi (A Drifting Life)
Arthur Conan Doyle (Sherlock Holmes)
Accountability for your leadership also means ignorant sheeple and conformist
followers of the movement will always want to conveniently place the blame of
their inconvenience and personal or private personal failings (that they're
technically reluctant to be responsible for) entirely on you.
Truth is, I'm not in a position to get important animation projects made, and
workloads of animation teams done. But I know people who are. More so than in
previous years. Maybe one day when I move out or move out I'll be in a safer
position. Right now there's too many dangerous factors running unchecked to make
things happen. For now I have to sit on the side lines. But on the plus side all my
heroes have heard of me and are aware of my presence online now. So at least the
people I admire acknowledge me if no one else does.

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Thursday, November 6th, 2014,

Damn straight. If I can succeed as a comic book creator, author, or cartoonist, I can
cash in and leverage that value. I can sell copies of insider collector's items from
my projects, auction them off online like all the greats do. To be honest I never
even thought about that. I autograph books, suddenly they're worth a LOT more.
The more famous you are, the more you're worth. Online auction sites are
awesome. And so is Scribd. It's an upload mark for any and all of my word
documents that contain stories or any form of creative writing, from poetry to
scripts, to comics, to book manuscripts, to songs, to journals, to essays and articles.
Anything and everything goes. And I can even charge money for them if I want.
Or put banner ads over it.
I smell a whole lotta money in the making.
Friday, November 7th, 2014,
Psychic Reading.
"I see you as being rich in the future"
"Something-something-something. 70,000...dollars perhaps?"
Being an export auctioneer of valuable books in my individual collection that I
initially bought with money I borrowed through credit, almost reminds me of John
D. Rockefeller and striking oil gold. In other words, I got my first taste of
something very valuable and collectible. Something that could potentially sell for a
very high auction fee if it's rare enough.
So technically, I could be a world auctioneer. Auctioning rare international
publishing items.

Saturday, November 8th, 2014,

I was right. When I thought about auctioning off my bandes dessinee tomes, I did
strike pop culture oil. Black Gold! Huzzah! This stuff goes for tons of money at
auction, depending on how rare it is and which artists are drawing it. Moebius and
Herge's artwork and comics sells for a large fortune on auction. They rival even the

P a g e | 1153

early issue of Superman and Batman in auction value. First editions of Ninja
Turtles issue 1 sells for a lot. Around $3,000 - $4,000 on the high end, depending
on which auction house you're selling to.
I didn't realize it initially, but I've got a collection of books that might go for a lot
of money on the collector's market. Franco-Belgian Bande Dessinee. This could
result in a huge financial breakthrough for me. Especially considering I could get
$1,000's for a handful of comics, when there's millions of these books out there.
Collecting is all about buying books for very low and selling those same books for
very high. Auctions are anonymous, so people are judging based on the quality of
the book alone.

Sunday, November 9th, 2014,

If your art isn't going to make you rich, you need to focus your attention on
attaining other rewards that go with being a successful artist, like meeting,
befriending, and maintaining friendship with other artists who like to hang out with
people either online or in person. I want to have new artist friends. Artists who are
friends.
I think God also knows I was meant for bigger things. God wants me to leave
Casselberry and maybe Florida behind as well, and just get the Hell out of dodge.
God doesn't want me to sit on a couch watching TV for the rest of my life. He
would say wasting my effort and power and abilities and only serving my parents
would be a sin, wasted talent, wasted energy, and wasted power. Wasting time,
power, and energy is a sin.
Monday, November 10th, 2014,
...Further proof Hollywood is a bunch of Biblio/Technophobes.
Well, I probably peaked. I don't really feel I could go much further than I already
have. But that's not too bad considering I got pretty far. I can't see myself getting
much farther than I've already come. Maybe (hopefully) things will quiet down
now. All that noise neighbors and media made was hurting my head, giving me
migraines and whatnot. Not going to miss that.

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To-Do List

Wait for email from Heritage Website

Wait for Appy Pie to get sponsors
Pay for advertising of stream garage
Keep Uploading to ActionToon
Draw pictures
Publish short stories to Scribd
Auction off Tomes
Develop Software with Daike and Hong, and make it available online as
shareware through third party shareware vendor sites? Put advertisements in
the software.

Step 1: Conceptualize Software GUI

Step 2: Map out Software GUI and Flowchart on paper
Step 3: Have subcontractors code programming language to build it
Step 4: Beta Test Software
Step 5: Pay Subcontractors
Step 6: Submit and Add software to Freeware sites (Soft32, Download.com)

Wednesday, November 12th, 2014,

Jeezus. All that stress from the last 11 years set me back in my studies. Enough
with the online articles! Time to throw some of those away. I have a few hundred
too many. There's been so many distractions I didn't even notice I went from being
so lazy I ended up not the best artist in the room, but the worst. I got a little bit of
praise in art school and suddenly I can't be bothered to produce good art for the rest
of my life. But when the media mishandles your image, it's the most energy time
wasting and distracting thing in the world. Like having relatives over at the
holidays or something. Annoying.
I like the Cerebus Effect" in indie comics. That lack off model consistency. How
the main character's body, but especially their head, morphs from panel to panel.

P a g e | 1155

There's no winning against the internet. It's like Half-Life, or Doom. It's impossible
to beat. There's too many evil minions of arch villains to kill. It's like a hydra. No
matter how many heads you cut off and decapitate, for each ugly spectacles
wearing Jared-from-Subway-Can-You-Hear-Me-Now-Verizon-Bastards head you
cut off, four more take its place.
New Story:
The Backyard that Created Predators...
Who's looking out for MY BEST INTEREST??
NO ONE! THAT'S WHO. I'm on my own, pretty much 24/7.
I found the perfect job. Office Building Janitor. I think I'd make a good office
building janitor. Cleaning offices only a handful of people go to, maybe at night,
maybe during the day. Mostly just mopping, dusting, and sweeping. I like how it's
manual labor and it pays well. Well better than nothing, which is what I've been
getting.
My beard is overpowering my jaw. My beard is getting bush, and adds an on
compliment to my glasses and curly hair. Actually my beard is overpowering my
whole face. I've waited 31 years to have a perfect black beard like what I'm
sporting now on my jaw. I'd say it's my chin but it's covering my entire jaw now.
It's eating my face alive. I'm pretty happy about that, as I'd much rather discuss my
beard than any other part of my face.
I'm definitely not clean shaven or "Butt-chinned" like Jay Leno.
Speaking of butt-chinned, my boyish charms and good looks have vanished,
leaving in their wake a very hairy face of aged maturity and adulthood. Sort of.
While I might still feel immature at times, I'm definitely not a boy anymore. I'm a
man. a strong, vigorous man with a lot of hair on his head, and fat on his stomach,
and thighs. I have the body type of A) A Black, scruffy NFL Football Player who
weighs 344 lbs., B) an 1800th Century American Oil Tycoon, or C) a 70-year old
congressman. I have an image of masculinity, an aura of testosterone and
machismo I don't see in my parodies too often.

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People have always had jobs, even during the Great "Recession" and Great
Depression. Even though a lot of people are unemployed most of the time, people
never stop having jobs 100% of the time, even if it's only a small "minority of the
population".
Greediest Americans:

Bill Gates
Cary Alberts
Steven Spielberg
George Lucas
Barack Obama
Seth MacFarlane
Sumner Redstoner
Mike Lazzo
Stuart Snyder
Funimation
Japan
Chameleodeon

People actually suffer from separation anxiety and absence depression every time
I'm away from Twitter, the internet, and my computer. I'm like crack to advertisers,
consumers, and corporations.
Time to make some people suffer.
Sometimes, there is a lot more power in not speaking after much time spent talking
too much.
I credit the 10 pages of sketches I did today to my Tiger Eye Gemstones in my
pocket, that helped me focus and begin to start to focus without even having to
think about it much.

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Phil Ferretti, my old animation mentor taught me just how much power animation
art and writing can give a person. Power, Fame, Money. Those are the three things
you draw for because those are the three things TV animation can give you, to a
greater or lesser degree, assuming you actual survive the rigors of grunt work and
succeed. That's just how it is. I'd like to think he knows seeing as at one point he
worked in New York for independent star animation creators and show runners
like Jim Jinkins and Mike Judge.
All blank pages are a piece of marble, to which the sculptor brings life and the
building and the masterwork, the manifestations of man's highest spiritual
aspirations. Going even so far back as the Italian Renaissance. That is the power of
art. Art is worth money, money pays for food. All of that junk.

Monday, November 17th, 2014 (My Birthday),

Happy Birthday to me! My inbox and twitter feed is full of messages for and about
me. And therefore my soul is full, too. Great Birthday so far! And I haven't even
gone traveling and opened my presents yet!
I am still putting in great effort to learn the Japanese, French, and Chinese
language sytems, of writing, reading, hearing, listening, understanding and speech,
in an effort to increase the versatility of my cultural career, for in case I engage in
business with and meet people who speak the language while traveling through
Eurasia as part of my studies, travels, and business ventures.
That is some powerful mojo I've got going on for me lately on my 31st Birthday.
My tweet got retweeted by anime professionals and fans alike more than 16 times!
Thanks Thomas! Thomases!
But as I wanted to get to, when studios make action cartoons, when Hollywood
studios make expensive action movies, when video game publishers make first
person shooter war games, when action comics get made in Japan and America,
they're all making the same movie. They're all telling the same story. Many
elements of which are my own contributions, such as badass longcoats, firey
female bombshells and pixie cuts, Demon Armies, Gritty Swordsmen, and PostApocalyptic Wastelands

P a g e | 1158

To be honest, I feel like some of the initial charges leveled against anime in private
by one of my teachers are now being leveled against me in a more polite way. One
of my teachers who will remain nameless used to criticize anime in comparison to
western toons saying "It's all the same shit". People say my action hero and war
genre is "all the same shit" now. A criticism I can definitely level with, as I look on
the bright side, at least with a homogenous genre and style, you likely won't be
disappointed, and your expectations of enjoying the genre will be met, as you'll
know what you're in for. You'll know what you're getting. When you watch anime,
you know what you're in for. You'll know what you're getting most of the time.
To be studied and investigated:

Charles Dickens
HG Wells (Time Machine, The Lost World)
Shakespeare - Othello, Hamlet, Romeo-Juliet
Leonardo - Notes
Kurt Vonnegut (Slaughterhouse Five)
Jorge Luis Borges
David Foster Wallace (Infinite Jest)
Uncle Tom's Cabin
Jim Butcher
George RR Martin
e.e. Cummings
Jack Kerouac (on the Road)
Ludwig Wittgenstein (Tractatus Logico Philosophicus)
Plato (The Poetics)
Richard Matheson
Joe Hill

P a g e | 1159

I'm 31 years old now.

I'm considering submitting my comics and literary fantasy work to the iconic pulp
trades: Heavy Metal Magazine, and Weird Tales magazine. I can submit my
comics and art to Heavy Metal, and my short stories to Weird Tales.

Wednesday, November 19th, 2014, 2:12 p.m.,

I'm noticing a pattern. I'm starting to feel like Andi Warhol, what with the
reprinting 1 illustration a million times. Making copies of copies of copies. It's
starting to feel a little boring to me. I'm going to need to produce some new cartoon
comics in the near future. As soon as I'm out of the Birthday Zone, it's back to
producing comics and cartoons. So far my strategy has been to keep releasing new
books, anthologies, and comic books with mostly the same pages every time, only
with each new edition, new pages get included. It's an accumulative strategic
printing processs. Normally, I'd be happy with this process, but the continual
reprinting of my artwork is beginning to make it feel like overkill. I've worked
more on a page-by-page basis than on a book-by-book basis. Though I kind of
have no idea what I'm doing as a publisher, I'm kind of getting the hang of it.
So far I've completed around 200 to 250 actual real life honest-to-god comic book
pages. But only about 40-60 of them are actually publishable. The rest are crap.
Some of my (comic) pages look decent and good. Others look amateurish and
incredibly sloppy and don't feel like I was trying when I drew them
Randomosity is random-awful. And End Times: A Graphic Novel is by far the
worst book I have ever published. As a matter of fact my hatred for much of the
pages in that book is so great I ripped out the majority of the book pages. I guess
technically you could call that editing. Better than being haunted by sloppy comic
book artwork.
As soon as I complete a 100 - 150 - 200 page sequel anthology to End Times:
AGN, I'm throwing End Times: AGN Vol. I away! Piece. Of. Garbage

P a g e | 1160
The Neo-Noir Manga-Comics Look
Comparatively speaking, my neo-noir panel illustration style is highly
creative, innovative, polished, and original. It forms this nice
little style-brand package I'm quite happy with. It's exactly the kind
of "art look" I was striving for in the past. Now I've gotten closure
on my style. I doubt the comics elite or comic book-animation or
manga-anime elite pros-&-press will make much note of it, but that
doesn't bother me at all, as I'm happy with my style and couldn't care
less if anyone else in the press or online feels the same way, to
acknowledge me, reward me or anything. That won't happen for another
10 to 20 years, if at all. I've got time to perfect my style. I'm
about 20 pages deep into a satisfactory noir style and form, or
"look", give or take.

Technically, I can do and achieve anything. Whatever it is I set my mind to. I've
always done this and had this ability. I do whatever I focus on. If I focus on writing
stories or scripts, I do that. If I focus on drawing comics, I do that. That's pretty
much it. Mission Accomplished for the time being. I've already done hundreds of
pages of comics, short stories, and scripts. It's over. I win. Better start praying.
My form@ work is becoming denser. Starting isn't even an issue anymore.
Comics, Novels, Screenplays. I started work on each individual field a long time
ago.
I've done enough multi-tasking with the comics, short story, and script work. I've
tried to multi-task all three. Now I'm approaching the time in my life where I will
be focusing on each task individually, single-tasking, and for longer durations. I'll
do one thing a day mostly. No more of this switching back and forth multitasking
multiple distractions from my goal. My goal is to do 1 thing a day, all day, for the
entirety of the day.
At this point I have transcended approval, recognition, rewards, the desire to have
high standing or be popular. At this point I have transcended caring about public
opinions regarding me and my work, locally, nationally, OR internationally. I'm
driving to work, not keeping up with what the Joneses are saying about me. I really
just want to work, just work, put the talk of work aside, and just work. Just write
short stories and scripts. Just sketch whatever it is that's compelling me that day.
Approval and recognition is beneath me. It's worthless to me, as the people who I
always wanted to take note of me, already do. Nothing else is worth bothering

P a g e | 1161

with. Public opinion and comments are Incredibly Worthless to me personally. In

the past I might have cared, but now it's the opposite of that. It's hard to convey
with words or images how much I don't care about what someone thinks of me
anywhere and everywhere. Adults don't need approval. Only children and
teenagers do. And I'm no longer one of those. That law also applies to those who
perpetuate the act of "denying me approval", as if they were important enough to
be entitled to such a position in my life to begin with (which they clearly are not).
Comics: 250 pgs.
Scripts: 60 pgs.
Short Stories - Novel: 50 pgs.
Journals: 1,000s of pgs.
Design, Illustrations, Concepts: 1,000s of pgs.

Novels, Short Stories, Scripts, and Comics, all start with a journal entry and
planning in notebooks and journals, until they are ready for the next stage of
development and elaboration.

Journals
Sketchbooks
Loglines
Outlines
Novels
Short Stories
Scripts
Screenplays
Concept Art
Comics
Production Design (Backgrounds)

P a g e | 1162

Current Goal: To become a more general and literary prose writer. Elaborate on
my short stories and epistolary science fiction and fantasy novels. I plan on
submitting to agents and literary journals, my bio, cover letter, query letter, and
short stories to numerous agencies, magazines, and literary journals of prose and
fantasy fiction, after I buy a copy of the Novel and short story writer's market.
Benefits:

Get my name out there, get discovered by agents, get an audience

Get my writing in front of 140,000 people.
Take my career to the next level
Pursue a form of prose that comes very easily to me
Learning to do second and third and fourth drafts of my short stories.
Get paid a lot of money. More than $120, or $45 per story (44 stories)
Because you can recycle: "Although magazine publishing is ephemeral, if
you retain the rights to your story, you can publish it again and again online, in anthologies, in short story book collections, and in other journals

Steps to Take:
Step 1: Brainstorming: Take out List binder of concepts. Look through
concepts list. Combine concepts. Create new list of story devices. As many
as I can think of
Step 2: Write Loglines and Synopses for each devices on list.
Step 3: Once I decide on my favorites, make outlines for all of them.
Step 4: Brainstorming, continued. Develop outlines for group of loglines.
Develop scenes, and plots.
Step 5: Alchemy. Transform scenes into short stories with characters and
descriptions and dialogue and plot

The Techniques Worked. I did my job, and succeeded at writing stories without too
much trouble, for one of the first days ever. That "work of worrying" technique
from The Now Habit is very useful. I spent all of today outlining and
brainstorming plot concepts and inciting incidents. At one point the force I felt
working against me getting creative and fictional writing done was tremendous.

P a g e | 1163

The spiritual resistance was tremendous. But I overcame it by using the "Work of
worrying". Instead of writing about the writing I wanted to do, I wrote the writing I
wanted to do. It was simple, I simply realized the gravitational pull of opposing
forces working against me was wrong and I overcame it. By working in spite of
those opposing people and feelings. And I succeeded in spite of them all. Those
opposing people and feelings have a powerful desire to not look stupid or be
proven wrong. All the better reason to do exactly that. So I created 25 entirely new
story concepts in one day that I built out of my concepts & topics list. 1 Inciting
Incident outline, of a back story that leads to the events. For now, all my novels are
going to be epistolary narratives, and all my short stories will be heavily outlined,
and pulled out of lists. It's amazing to think I get this much work done despite
being one of the most heavily hacked into and spied on writers in the
world/country. That's a LOT of psychic power gravitation working against me with
an opposing energy. Yet I still overcome it anyway, because I guess I'm just strong
and powerful enough to do that, to overcome the world media.

Friday, November 21st, 2014,

I've both finished and begun work on 61 short stories in total. My writing is going
through a gradual transformation. I'm finally beginning to overcome
procrastination in my short fiction writing and get in the zone.
My literature is transforming into full-on Phoenix Transformation Mode. Where
writing fiction is a habit, not a choice, and I only do one thing a day, for the entire
day (i.e. comics, short stories, novels, or scripts).
Chris Interview Question: "How do you picture your stories in your mind as your
writing them? Do you picture color? Your character's clothing? Movement and
motion? The Background?"
Answer: I picture a little bit of everything. You kind of have to. But above all, I try
to see it as a combination of 2 main things: The plot unraveling playing as a feature
film in my head, and envisioning the scenes in my head as though I'm picturing it
happening at a separate place than where I am, somewhere far away or nearby in

P a g e | 1164

the real world. I picture the narrative I'm writing from my own imagination in the
same way I picture scenes from the novels and memoirs I read.
Authors and Works of Transformative Literature:

William James
Aristotle
Carl Jung
Joseph Campbell
Malcolm Gladwell
Napoleon Hill
Ken Wilber
The Now Habit
Think and Grow Rich
Habit
Focus
Self-Discipline
Will Power
The Laws of Power
HH The Dalai Lama
Thomas Merton
The World's 100 Greatest People
Lao-Tzu
Chi
Tai Chi
Zen Buddhism
Lama Surya Das
The Flow
Innovation
The Power of Myth
JRR Tolkien
Edgar Cayce
Channeling
Being Psychic For Dummies

P a g e | 1165

For Dummies
Idiot's Guide
Ascended Masters
Astrology
Consciousness
MBTI Typology
Psychology
Self-Awareness
Mindfulness

P a g e | 1166

Chapter 18

P a g e | 1167

Friday, November 21st, 2014, 10: 56 a.m.,

Yesterday marked a milestone.
I established the groundwork of 2 new important habits.

5 Hour Powered All Day Short Story Writing Session Only

Single Tasking Short Story Outlines and Loglines (no comics or scripts or novel work
during that particular day).

Now that the habits' seed has been planted, I watch the tree grow, by repeating the same activity
all day, every subsequent day, on a daily basis.
Similar to how I established these journals through morning pages. Good times.
Next year I am going to start spending time at the local gym downtown. I no longer have a desire
to be a spectacle wearing mythological blob guy thing. I'm planning on working off a small
amount of my fat starting off, if nothing else. With jeering crowds and hecklers all the way. I
don't care. I got to get in shape somehow. I'd work out at home, but my parents don't allow it.
They won't allow me to build a home gym and train at home, so I have to do it the regular way.
Well, that, and I want to get lighter and stronger, and improve my physique. If you're not in
shape, the world will walk all over you. Plus, my health will improve if I work out. It's not the
first time I've ever been at the gym, to be honest, but it's been forever since I've traveled locally
to a gym. I miss being physically strong, a jock, of sorts. What with league football, baseball,
and all that. Some guys like to act tough, but I don't see them hitting the gym, so they're either all
talk or literally full of bullshit. Not impressive at all. I need to remove myself from that kind of
situation. It's not healthy living in someone else's movie.
Like a lot of abuse victims, I'm starting to realize I can channel my suffering into strength,
unbeknownst to my attackers and would be criticizers. Every time someone abuses me, I channel
that into constructive energy, or workout time. That's actually pretty smart to channel any
potential pain and suffering the abuse my neighbors and bullies give me into legitimate exercise.
They sure as hell aren't going to walk up to me and fight me like real men. They're going to
continue to be underhanded sneaks, so I'll overcompensate. Everytime they make me feel small, I
will channel my rage into making me big.ger.
My MOM keeps trying to stop me from going to the gym, starting a membership, and working
out at the gym. She's got a whole old female obstacle course of sabotage-y excuses. Better watch
myself I guess.
I'm too smart to fall for my animation career like a sucker. I know better than to attempt making
a career out of animation, both adult swim and anime/toonami. Especially considering there's an
epic pr gimmick campaign hidden to sabotage that exact thing. The animation industry holds no

P a g e | 1168

power over my writing abilities. Suddenly things are a lot clearer than they once were. I'm a
writer first and an animation fanatic second. Especially in the last 10 years.
I'm not a cartoonist, or an animator (good luck guys, you're on your own). Assuming I have
enough energy, I'm a short story writer. And that's all I am right now. Well, other than a diarist.
Any compulsion or habit can be started or overcome. It starts with recognizing both the cue that
causes one to engage in the habit and the reward or incentive you get for failing to stop yourself
from indulging in that habit. Habits start in cues, and end in "rewards", with the habit being the
middle man. Knowing that you can quit virtually any addiction, with the right amount of will
power, focus, and self awareness, and keeping all those habit forming cues out of your life.

Sunday, November 23rd, 2014, 4:49 p.m.

Decided to briefly follow the First Church of Satan (U.S. and U.K. Branches) on Twitter for a
day or two. That kinda felt like a fun, new thing to try. Hail Satan. Regular Christianity kind of
blows (They fuck kids and hate gays. Horrible). Especially since it brainwashed Andrew and his
family. Much as me and all my friends hate all that family's guts with a serious passion, I don't
like seeing my brother join cults. That's dangerous shit, bro!
People are listening to the things I'm saying. America is listening to me. Everything, even what I
don't want them to hear. I must choose my words and actions carefully. Nearly if not all of what I
could put out there can be taken the wrong way by blowhards somewhere.
Damn. Dethklok is a very literary band. How, you ask? They're about as deep as Gorillaz, you
say? Well, actually, they are the soundtrack to almost every dramatic and dark-epic-fantasypoetic thing I write. I LOVE DETHKLOK! DETHKLOK RULES! The sound of their music
defines the true nature of my storytelling. They are the John Williams to my Steven Spielberg.
The Danny Elfman to my Tim Burton.
Animation is all about compatibility. Jobs are created, animators and cartoonists get hired, when
the style of their stories and artwork are compatible with the study and company.
"Work With Us. Or Don't Work With Us."
-[adult swim producer]

Evil Creepy Neighbor Criminal Dude + Me + Ladder + fence = Ass Whoopin'

P a g e | 1169

Right now, I'd like nothing better than to take a chainsaw and cut down the palm trees in my
back yard. I HATE that tree, and I hate the person hiding behind it. But that's old news.

Twitter Friends:

Thomas Romain
Bruce Lee Legacy
Chris Prynoski (Titmouse)
LeSean Thomas (Cannon Busters, Black Dynamite, The Boondocks)

I've decided, I don't want to draw all the pages for my comics, or even the animated series. I'm
going to break into the licensing business and the comic book agency community. I found three
new companies: Surge (Axe Cop) (founded by the man who discovered TMNT), King Features
Syndicate (Stan Lee, Spider-Man, The Phantom, Prince Valiant), and Janklow and Nesbit
Associates (Blankets, Ted Turner: Call Me Ted, Terry Brooks).
You can approach agencies and licensing companies, but it is very difficult to approach
animation studios and TV networks or movie studios without being ignored or rejected. I
realized I need a team that's going to do the selling and negotiations for me.

Tuesday, November 25th, 2014, 2:58 p.m.,

I'm aiming to set a world record, as the youngest author in world history to write a 1,000 page
book series (17 years old when I finished both manuscripts). If I break this record, my name will
go down in history as a historic writer and everything! This journal might get into the Guinness
Book of World Records. History in the making, bitches!
Unfortunately, I won't be hearing back from the Guinness World Records Committee and Judges
until December, next month.
Either way, I'm a famous author and cartoonist. Not the most famous. Halfway there though,
maybe.
Wednesday, November 26th, 2014, 4:59,
I've finished a lot of pages of comics art.
Around 60 polished story related pages,
Or 3 mini-issues worth.
It's only a matter of time until I find a publisher

P a g e | 1170

I don't know why, but Peggy seems to get off on being around abusive people. The neighbors
and her family. But why does she like to hang out and enable abuse so much? That reflects
poorly on her. That says my mother is a punching bag. My mother is a doormat. She doesn't just
encourage her own abuse. She seems to be a masochist who enjoys it. Fuck that, man. I'll have to
remember to write her up in my story as "The abused Housewife...Who enjoys her own abuse".

Even if I do end up finishing my comics, there will be sophomore anxiety.

You know, "Even if I draw a thousand pages, who's going to publish it? Who's going to sell and
distribute it?"
I guess I just gotta have faith my work will find a profitable home.
Currently I'm eyeing Del Ray Graphic Novels and Manga. Them, or Seven Seas Entertainment.
From now on, both Blogger and Kindle Digital Press (KDP) will serve as a proxy promotional
tool, and a form of portfolio.

Okay. Now it's just Me vs. the Animation-Comic Book Taliban.

A bunch of pre-established pros and creators who aggressively defend their profits and titles.
People desperate to aggressively attempt to make sure my efforts yield no profit on my part.
There's also the Anime Taliban, but I'm not as worried about them.

Friday, November 28th, 2014, 8:20 p.m.,

Success is a daily process, not a lifetime status symbol or achievement. That former answer
would be incredibly boring.
Now comes one of the emotionally challenging times of my life: My 30s and maybe my 40s.
There's a high likelihood I could work very hard in my 30s, but like all the previous decades it
wouldn't yield any results, either.
Kids aren't being brought up to appreciate slow success. They're being taught to be impatient and
demand results now. The internet is killing kids' willpower and patience. The internet is killing
an entire GENERATION'S will power and patience. The one I belong to. No one I know who's
in their thirties wants to wait around for things to happen, or God forbid wait around to reach
their 40s and beyond.

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These are stressful times we live in, echoed by the reflection and echoes of the media's shadow.
I believe in getting rich and famous the old fashioned way. NOT the Mark Zuckerberg or Justin
Bieber way.
Time to reorganize my priorities. Instead of general world building, I'm building the illustrated
equivalent of movie sets. From now on, I'm only developing what appears in the camera shot,
what appears in the panel. And instead of getting the beginning of my story down (because I
already did that), I'm going to be focusing on the mid way tasks, like page layouts, thumbs, panel
sketching, and pose finalization, as well as character design and elaboration. I'm pretty far into
this thing. At least 50 - 100 pages. I didn't count. I don't care about page count anymore. That
kind of thing will drive you fucking batty if you let it.
Also,

Draw every day.

Work HARD every day
Remain focused.
Take the work as it comes, as its available day by day.
Write more scripts if possible. Plan out dialogue and scenes, narrow my focus.
Stop reading tutorials, they will only make you indecisive.

I have numerous Asian and European (Eurasian) animation friends and business connections
now.
Yus! That was kind of my dream. To be friends with people in Japan, France, Europe, and China.
It's good luck to befriend people from that region, that's why it's a big deal to me on a personal
level.
And the daytime creeps come out to "play". Again! Oh joy.
When you sing, you have to "project". You have to put your whole voice into it and move your
hands. It's sort of like shouting at people, only it's melodic in nature. Before I began singing
seriously, I sounded like my parents and brother. Very gruff and constricted. Unpleasant to listen
to. EXTREMELY unpleasant to listen to if we're talking about Cary's voice. He sounds like a
shrieking weasel when he gets mad.
Monday, December 12th, 2014, 12:30 a.m.,
Why does Jeff Zucker like pedophiles so much? He's a pedophile's biggest fan, what with his
Hitler army at NBC he commanded, or is it Joseph McCarthy, or both. Oh well, he's out of
power at NBC, so no more opportunities to terrorize the populous with NBC News and
Networks. I'm glad his reign as a bigot and zealot in a position of power is over. From
overseeing NBC's entire anti-pedophile agenda, in secret of course. He ran NBC like a third

P a g e | 1172

world military, controlled by a corrupt Bush Administration. NBC cranked out horrible, bigoted,
racist, misinformed, ill advised and discriminatory series, from "To Catch a Predator" to "Law
and Order: Special Victims Unit", that really were out to hurt me and other people. But
especially me, trying to make me look like a criminal falsify my reputation on numerous
occasions. I was their unknowing pawn. Their effigy, all because of loli porn. I noticed on some
websites. It's amazing how far they wanted to make it seem so much more criminal and serious
than just me looking at loli and yuri porn online.
Speaking of special, I'm dedicating a special honor to him now. I'm creating an allegorical
version of him. Jeff Zud the Pedophile Colonel. He's got more closet sex issues than Adolf Hitler
and Bill Clinton.

I made my first Album. It's an audio experiment: I do songs, gags, spoken word, word and
rhythm, sound bites, and comedy skits. Parental Advisory, explicit lyrics. Especially the part
where To Catch a Predator's Chris Hanson ejaculates into the teenage girl's butt on track 26
1.
2.
3.
4.
5.
6.
7.
8.
9.
10.
11.
12.
13.
14.
15.
16.
17.
18.
19.
20.
21.
22.
23.
24.
25.

My Woody
Who AM I
ThamThung Galacthy Eth Five
The Revenge of Denzel Crocker
Cwawence, Bitch
Poor Rarity
At The End of the Tour
Get Down
Cool Kids
The Very Best of Duke Nukem
Cool Kids
Anime Chinaman - Intro
Anime Chinaman 1
Anime Chinaman 2
Anime Chinaman's Fave Dub
Happiness and other Faggotrys
Censorship - TV and REALITY
The Sexcapades of Buckethead
LIVE! Chris Crocker Reports
If
Mandy
Kamehameha
BANZAI!!!
Busta Flipmode Squad
The Masturbation Nazi

P a g e | 1173
26. Hi I'm Chris
27. Teen Groupies

I'm going to be rich when my parents die. Once they die, if any time soon I'll receive up to
$100k. Great! What can I do with that beneficiary $100k once I no longer have living parents.
Now I can move to Canada.

Wednesday, December 3rd, 2014, 10:07,

My musical soul re-awakened on the 1st of December, 2014. It started when I figured out how to
use Podsnack.com, and upload self-made mp3 files to my account, primarily of just my voice
messing around on my cell phone at the beginning and start of it. But next thing I knew, I was
singing musical choruses and bridges, and calling my voiceover teacher, Ginny Kompf, I hadn't
spoken too in like 5 years for advice, and then my parents helped me dig out my acoustic guitar
out of my parents closet that I forgot I owned that had been protected from me when I tried to get
rid of it once on a whim. Man, that might be the first time I've ever been glad my parents didn't
listen to me when I told them to do something.
Things I can actually kind of do

Singing
Songwriting
Recording
Acoustic guitar
Skits
Folk Singing
Comedy Rock
Experimental / Avant Garde / Spoken Word
Electric Guitar
Rock Music
Heavy Metal
Alternative Rock
Folk Rock
Alterative Metal
Soundtrack
Digital Engineering
Drums

P a g e | 1174

I should get back in touch with Jonny Bartlett and Matt Cicero, my old middle school band class
friends. See if they need a singer and guitar player.
I'm eager to come up with some material for some experiment Tenacious D-style folk-metal
songs.

Thursday, December 4th, 2014, 5:56 p.m.,

Turns out there's more to my musicianship abilities than I initially thought. I used to just assume
I was only a percussionist. But I'm a guitarist and vocalist too. As well as a singer-songwriter.
I like folk-metal. Like what Tenacious D did in 2002 or so, what with acoustics and metal
guitars. Tenacious D are folk-metal pioneers. "Wonder Boy", "Tribute", and "Kielbasa" are 2 of
their best tracks. They really got me through art school, listening to that album. So amazing!
Influences, as a musician:

Folk Revivalist
Animated Musical
Thrash Metal
Comedy Rock
Indie rock

Currently, as a newly realized musician, I'm learning to teach myself how to be a:

Songwriter
Singer (of original lyrics)
Electric Rock Guitarist
Alternative Metal Guitarist
Acoustic Guitarist

I spent all day building up bits and pieces of skill at these talents.
Things to do on a daily basis

Listen to music on Rhapsody

Write Lyrics
Practice Singing 24/7. Get Feedback.
Brainstorm Lyrics
Practice Folk Rock Guitar
Record Demo Tape Tracks for Podsnack
Work out at Gym

P a g e | 1175

Additional Duties:

Draw sketches
Fill Up Sketchbook
Write in Journal
Write Short Fiction
Write Novel
Draw Comics Pages
Write Screenplay

Friday, December 5th, 2014, 5:41 a.m.

Next time Jean Hess comes over, I'm gonna ask her to play the piano, while I sing. She loves my
singing and has become a great friend in the process. If anyone could provide a piano melody to
my singing, it would be her.
Instruments to Practice:

Piano-Keyboard
Electric Guitar
Acoustic Guitar
Voice
Words (Lyrics)

For the next few weeks, I'm pretty sure I'll be returning to Musician Mode. The difference
between me studying music now, and me studying music when I was 13 in middle school, is that
now, I have more resources. I have a million Google Results. A billion tutorial videos and
articles for music, writing, and singing. I also have a lot of previous writing to draw upon. I also
have mental strategy and planning and self-notation I apply to my work now I never used to
have. I never used to be this focused.
Aw fuck it.
Git down!
Time to Kick out the Jams.
I'm Beginning to understand songwriting and singing.
Chorus, verse, bridge, hook, beat, lyrics, tempo, rhythm, melody, harmony, tune, fret,
strumming, notes, tablature, fuzz, fuzz box, amplifier, stereo, fret board, 1 2 3 4 5, sixteenth note.

P a g e | 1176

I'm currently developing brand new lyrics and script ideas

for a full length Theatrical Animated Musical of Parallax and Mono
I'm thinking it's Elric of Melnibone / Star Wars meets 9 / The Nightmare Before Christmas.
An Animated Musical About New-Earth, a World of the Apocalypse
I'd like to be one of the musical contributors to the film.
I'm deciding if they'll burst into song, or whether it will just be a highly musical score and
soundtrack, i.e....

Danny Elfman
Trent Reznor
RZA
Kevin Manthei (ZIM)
Metaphor the Great
Radiohead.

I plan on incorporating lots of industrial rock, orchestral, hip-hop, thrash and heavy metal, and
alternative rock. But it might be a challenge getting any of those guys to be in the same studio or
collaborate. I guess I gotta bring my A-Game.
Films with a great soundtrack

Star Wars
The Lord of the Rings
Space Jam
9
The Nightmare Before Christmas
Pulp Fiction
The Boondocks
Invader Zim
The Matrix
Max Payne
Batman
Afro Samurai
Gone Girl
Blade (Wesley Snipes)

P a g e | 1177

Favorite Animation Composers:

Danny Elfman
Kevin Manthei
Brendon Small
The RZA
Asian Kung Fu Generation
Flow
Metaphor the Great

Now that I think about it, music comprehension, execution, appreciation, and theory is one of my
specialties. I understand drums the best, but am starting to finally get the hang of songwriting,
acoustics, guitar, and piano.
It's all about fundamentals, and mastering fundamental notation.
And to which is asked, Who will resurrect our favorite animated series?
To which my response is: My network will. James Sorrell and ActionToonTV.com. I'm bringin'
back all the new and old broadcasting action cartoon hits from East-West broadcast hybrid.
I kind of like how I get to oversee, supervise, and kind of also approve LeSean Thomas and
Thomas Romain's work on Cannon Busters from a distance. That one comment I left on twitter
got, I have no idea, at least 15 - 20 retweets and favorites from creators, artists, producers, and
others anime people.
December is my favorite month. November is my second favorite. Christmas is my favorite time,
followed by my Birthday (November 17th, Scorpion), and Halloween.
My favorite Christmas movie is also my favorite Halloween movie, one of the most visually
creative and enchanting films ever made: Tim Burton's The Nightmare Before Christmas. Scary
in the best possible way. And Blacker than Hell. It holds a deep place in my heart. I know that
movie's every last scene, and every word of its every musical number. As well as every note and
dialogue of every song and scene.
Other than that there is the Cannes Film Festival Palme d'Or Prize-winning gangster black
comedy film Pulp Fiction.

P a g e | 1178

Music:

Green Day - Dookie

Radiohead - OK Computer
Smashing Pumpkins - Mellon Collie & The Infinite Sadness
Marilyn Manson - Antichrist Superstar
UNKLE - Psyence Fiction
Weezer - The Blue Album
They Might Be Giants - Factory Showroom
Bloodhound Gang - One Fierce Beer Coaster
Sugar Ray - Floored
Nine Inch Nails - The Fragile
Nine Inch Nails - Year Zero
Weezer - Maladroit
Eminem - The Marshall Mathers LP
Eminem - The Marshall Mathers LP 2
Men In Black - The Soundtrack

I'm still learning to tap into my religious, holy, psychic, shaman, mystical, and music powers.
Because my father was a Trappist Monk, I biologically inherited my father's Holy ability to bless
things.
All I have to do is bless the cross upon my face and chest, and say
In the Name of the Father
Son and Holy Spirit.
Amen
I can NOT Wait to bless all my favorite people and stuff. Books, instruments, technology,
papers, comics.
So today, my self-imposed lesson plan called for a brief introduction to guitar notation and
tablature.
As it turns out, I narrowly escaped the clutches of the Central Florida Medical Narcotherapy
Racket with my very life. Talk about a close call. Glad I Survived and could finally move on.
Better tell Jo Ann Cooke that all those years of me "hearing hallucinatory voices" was in fact a
misdiagnosis. That was my mindreading ability in action. For you see, I am an empath, a very
special kind of psychic telepathic mind reader.

P a g e | 1179

Things I want to accomplish:

Master Music
Master Drawing-Art
Master Writing-Literature
Master Filmmaking and Broadcasting
Master Computers and the Internet
Run my Businesses
Master my spiritual awareness
Travel the world. That or read about traveling the world, in books I purchase online
Become Healthy and Fit
Cut down on the Goddamn Worthless, Often Inflammatory Television

Performance Abilities: Things I Can Do On The Spot:

Sing
Talk to My Cats
Write Improvisationally
Read People's Emotional Minds with Telepathy
Resting, Sitting, & Standing Atop My Invisible Foundation (Social Media)
Online Video Industry

Monday, December 8th, 2014,

Currently, I'm learning how to play the first (highest notes) strings of the guitar. That's 11 notes
in all. Currently, the ones I'm learning start on the far right and move left till they end at the
middle. of the chart...

P a g e | 1180

I spent 20 minutes of practice time on the guitar yesterday afternoon. It all went to shit after that.
My parents called the cops on me, wanted to get me arrested for stupid as shit reasons. All
because they wanted to start a fight. So I obliged them. Then after the police left, I went out and
celebrated my surviving freedom by doing a black power salute on the raining street and on the
bully neighbors' yard. Part of me thinks going to jail would be pretty cool: A bragging right.
Hardcore n' shit.
Oh my God. I'm becoming a real life rock star. That's actually pretty cool. Hating on my parents,
almost getting arrested and going to jail, playing guitars, singing.
I'm a Rock Star!
MP3 Distribution Sites (that are actually pretty good):

Podsnack.com
Soundcloud.com
Songcastmusic.com
Tunecore.com (music distribution)

Yeah, you know record companies, and book publishers, and comics publishers? And animation
companies, and L.A. Writing agencies, and Screenwriting agencies.
You know what? Screw winning over their approval or getting represented by them. Screw you
guys, I'm going home. I've got Kindle, Ink Blazers, Soundcloud, Google Play, Online
advertising, and iTunes, as well as Amazon Prime, as well as radio apps. If agencies approach
me to represent me, that would be a horse of a different color, wouldn't it?
I am an audio, visual design, and literary utopianist.

P a g e | 1181

Thank god I found out (against my parents wishes) that I do in fact have compensatory life
insurance. I'll have a lot of money in the future. In the 6-figures. I'll never have to worry about
money again if my parents die. Talk about a safety net. So guess it does pay being the next of kin
of a semi-wealthy local pharmacist. Wealthy. Well off. Same thing. I'm sitting around waiting
for pay dirt! Ha Hah! Just kidding
I'll use my life insurance money to relocate, to either France, Michigan, Oregon, or Canada.
Where ever the comics and animation is.
Well, since my dad bribed me with life insurance, SURE! I'll attend his funeral. If ya PAY ME!
Which he will in an odd sense of the term.
Now it's just me and the work. Money is not an issue. Now it's just:

Comics
Spirituality
Writing
Art
Design
Screenwriting
Panels and Boards
Short Fiction
Novels

Yay! Now I can work on my own projects without financial anxiety, knowing everything is taken
care of for me.
But the thing is, yes, technically I will receive a six figure windfall upon the passing of my
parents, according to their hidden paperwork, which I secretly looked into.

P a g e | 1182

Wednesday, December 11th, 2014

Yay! I finally get to live my pipe dream of being an animation (or) anime producer.
I put up an ad as an animation producer and animator on freelancer.com, asking if any
animators would be interested, sometimes around 6:20 a.m. or so. It's now 7:53 and
I've gotten 4 bids from independent animation studios. I have yet to find the perfect
match, but I think it's important I don't be a perfectionist and work with what the
heavens hand to me. I'm thankful I'm getting any bids at all. I'll probably eventually
re-email Steve Blum to voice the animated Mono.
A lot of my potential "suitors" are entirely digital, which is cool, but I'm really
hoping I find some studios with killer traditional 2-D pencil and/or ink demo reels.
As a producer I don't want standing around in a wide shot. I want high angles, low
angles, oblique angles, overlapping and foreshortening, close ups. That whole anime
and cinematic vibe. Lots of motion and action. The animation might not be perfectly
executed. But honestly I don't care if it's perfect. I'm in the business of making
finished animation, flaws and all. A flawed demo reel is better than one that never
gets made.
As the producer, I hire, contact, and negotiate deals with talent and studios. I
supervise the production. Review pre-production, mid and post production work,
artwork, scripts (if any) and animation tests and voice reels, on software like
Shotgun, the producer software. And I also approve everything before anyone outside of
the cast and crew get to see it.
My goal is to develop, animated, and produce a demo reel and / or short film. A
sequence of animation no more than 2-5 minutes long. I'm considering doing a martial
arts or rooftop zen sequence. Something moody and exciting, with dynamic light and
shadows.
In terms of getting that producer job. It's important to create your own work for
yourself as often as you can, even if it means you have to do the hiring and
supervising of all employees and staff yourself on smaller online projects (short
films, demo reels, pilots). Work on short form pieces, and work your way up to longer
projects. It's up to you to prove yourself, your vision, your production process
style, and your production techniques and methods every step of the way. It's all
about the final illusion.
Once I find the right studio of artists and animators, we'll need to have an online
meeting through chat online, phone, or video conferencing. But I can't afford the
equipment for video conferencing. So I gotta go with minimalistic communication
methods. Just the essentials for communicating with future cast and crew.
Bottom line is, you've got to go to and create your opportunity. Not wait for it to
come to you. Create a freelancer.com or odesk.com listing. Network on LinkedIn. Make
connections and give and be open to feedback and input, and don't let your ambitions,
aspirations, and ego get in the way of REAL business and animation production
negotiations.
My potential budget for my film is miniscule. Potentially a temporary savings fund of
$50 - $200.

The hard part isn't starting or maintaining a business and studio.

P a g e | 1183

The hard part is keeping it going, keeping it in business and lucrative.

My power and influence over society, the world, and American-Eurasian Culture and Pop
Culture will never be officially documented or acknowledged. I'm fine with that. But it will be
ubiquitous and out on the front row for all to see, largely undetectable for quite some time to
come. All because I showed a little bravery and had the courage to take a few risks. Like having
an unconventional personal life, and putting complete faith in my career and hard work in a
Horatio Alger rags to riches sort of way.
The masters of cartoonist simplicity (Scott McCloud, Stan Sakai, Matt Groening, John Buscema,
Tezuka Osamu) are right. They make a valid point that contemporary anime has attempted to
bulldoze over lately.
Which is:
Simple isn't necessarily dumb. Simple is good. Simple imagery, simple designs, and simply
constructed "cartoony" characters are often the best vessel for exploring complex subject matter.
The content-form schism of complexity-simplicity (The Tao of simple-complex) adds an entirely
new, awe inspiring, and wonderful layer of added complexity.
also, upon reading an interview book featuring Scott McCloud, I've come to realize the epiphany
he came to realize in collecting and "reading" but really just visually observing manga without
knowing the langauge, is the exact same more contemporary epiphany I had browsing and
buying secretly hidden away, locked away Bandes Dessinee tomes from France and "reading
those too", only with a highly minimal knowledge of the French and Parisian Language. It's
history repeating. Maybe someday I too can write an academic essay about my studies of comics,
only instead of manga I will be focusing on the post-Moebius French scene, which was taking
off (in my private life at the very least) right around the time Moebius himself passed away
around 2012.
When Scott McCloud set out to make Zot!, in his own words he "Set out to put every single last
ounce of strength and full power I had into blowing old man Jack [Kirby] (his idol) away. He
didn't believe he succeeded looking back, but I think actually did pretty damn good.
That's what I want to do. I want to focus all my strength and power into blowing good old
Jhonen and Paul Pope and Jim Mahfood and Jamie Hewlett away with End Times. Put as much
delicacy and care into my pages as they put into theirs. Delicacy of brushstroke or pen stroke
manifests art of great beauty.
I don't think I'm EVER going completely digital with my art. I like using primal, primitive
methods of drafting and drawing supplies. I'm literally Fred Flintstone taking a shit in a seagull's
mouth (gross, I know) in his house in The Town of Bedrock. At least in terms of production
methods. My ink is smudged and smattered. Sloppy, and you can see where I made my mistakes

P a g e | 1184

half the time. But I'm kind of startin' to like it. I like the energy and simplicity of it. The Power of
the energy put into each page's composition, as little as their might actually be.

Friday, December 12th, 2014, 10:27 p.m.,

My abilities, despite having a lot of power and energy, are limited. Generally I only have enough
energy to tap into my full power and control, or manipulate and harness, it, once or twice a day.
Well, the fact that I can only use my powers once a day, and can only use one power per day.
So, Novelist, Screenwriter, or Cartoonist, I can only be one of those things each day, once a day.
So I can only be a novelist for one consecutive day, once a day.
I can only be a screenwriter for one consecutive day, once a day.
And I can only be a cartoonist for one consecutive day, once a day
That's the limitations of my powers and energy.

P a g e | 1185

Saturday, December 13th, 2014, 8:43 p.m.,

I've waited my whole life for this moment.
I finally got promoted to the title of Animation Executive Producer. I'm the Boss. I'm in Charge.
I've got the authority and power to commence and halt production. I supervise and oversee
everything. All aspects of production. The failure or success of my project comes down to how
well I can manage it, and the crew that creates the animation for it, the short film I'm developing
and supervising.
Some hope for the future; Some wait for the call
To say that the days ahead will be the best of all
We will build bridges up to the sky
Heavenly light surrounding you and I
From out of the darkness our future will come
If we leave the past behind we'll fly beyond the Sun
We'll be together, sharing the load
Watching in wonder as our lives unfold
Hope for the future
It's coming soon enough
How fast can we achieve?
Hope for the future
It will belong to us, if we believe
Hope that rises in the dark
Where nothing's ever seen
Lighting undiscovered places no one's ever been
Some hope for the future; Some wait for the call
To say that our destiny will be the best of all
And we will build bridges up to the sky
Heavenly light surrounding you and I
Hope that rises in the dark
Where nothing's ever seen
Lighting undiscovered places no one's ever been
Hope for the future
Hope for the future
Hope for the future

P a g e | 1186

My twitter following feels kind of...massive to me. I couldn't imagine having millions or
thousands of followers. Just having 250 or so is a lot to manage. It's a tad bit overwhelming.

P a g e | 1187

Chapter 19

P a g e | 1188

Sunday, December 14th, 2014, 8:03,

Though a lot of my mentor Phil's good habits rubbed off on me, so did some of his bad habits
too. Like overconfidence and an overwhelming hunger for power from your job.
I never used to be so aggressive and power hungry. I've changed a bit too much.

Tuesday, December 16th, 2014,

A lot of instructors don't say this, if you want to draw and write comics, you have to read comics.
As many comics by other people as possible.
Just like if you want to write a novel you have to read other authors' novels. It's the same
principle.
If you want to draw comics you need to read comics and study how they're made. Study how
other artists make them.
In my comic book universe, EVERY city landscape and background is an Invader Zim/Batman
Animated City Landscape and Background! I emulate the Best of the West.
I remember how Oliver Guse, an Asian Animation producer from Canada and the Philippines
once recommended I draw some of what is referred to in anime as Production Stills. So I finally
did! It got a lot of positive reactions online, and I'm actually very happy with the finished image.
Since it's one of my best illustration and production pieces, and good enough to be a professional
production still, I'm posting it in my journal book here, too. It's completely imaginary and made
up from my imagination and sketchbooks...

Compositing Example A

P a g e | 1189

The visual concept is to have Mono sky jumping off a skyscraper rooftop to fight a villain or
demonic monster once he landed on solid ground.
So now that I've put a little bit of practice into establishing where my skill and drafting level is, I
realize I'm a more appropriate artist to draw urban aerial-acrobatic stunts and flying
choreography than I initially thought. That drawing I cranked out today feels almost at a Disney
Feature Animation level of Quality. It would be too weird to compare myself to Production IG or
Gainax so I'm not going to do that. But if this is my newest illustration and design phase, one
with highly advanced perspective, I'm closer to realizing my comics pages than ever before.
Areas of Artistic Skill (Stick to What I Know):

Noir
Shadow Design
Lighting Design
City and Urban Design
Production Design
Cloth and Fabric
Head and Portraiture
Perspective
Weapons Design

Compositing Example B
Clearly, Example A is superior to Example B

P a g e | 1190

Why A is better than B:

A looks three dimensional

A has a better compositional arrangement
A uses perspective in its architecture
A isn't flat, as has already been mentioned. It is three dimensional
A is polished. B is sloppy and splotchy

I am the only one of my kind. I am unique. There IS NO ONE ELSE out there exactly like me. I
set a unique, innovative example that no one else has established before.
I should always remember 2 things:
There's no one like me out there in the media
Trust No One,
Especially Strangers and People Who Approach Me from a Near or Distant level from Out of the
Blue.

I can create prosperity for all purely through my own will power and taking my own initiative
and taking action. Just me simply beginning work on my fiction and scripts, and drawing comics
and broadcasting on YT and Ustream often causes instant result that the networks don't want you
to know about, this dramatic shift in media company trajectory is responding directly to my raw
power, often for better, sometimes for worse, and by worse I mean an imitation knock off
copycat cash grab. But that's the media. That's how it works. I'm the IT Guy, so it's follow the
leader everywhere.
Boredom is a powerful motivator. My writing and my art needs to be a response and an escapism
from boredom that leads to greater things.
Just occurred to me. Every time I gain some energy and focus, and get a powerful flow going,
Mom and Dad, Cary and Peggy display an unconscious desire to disrupt that flow at every
opportunity. They're almost as bad as the TV. Worse in some instances. They'll walk in and out
of the room I'm working in, talk to me when I'm working in a trance and attempt to disrupt my
channeling trance, speak loudly in the other room to Jinnel, Andrrew, and Beth in what on the
surfaces looks like a highly focused intent to be annoying and disruptive to my life's work, hassle
me to clean up clutter I have that helps keep my flow going, and, worst of all, constantly more
my papers, magazines, and books around to sabotage my flow in an effort to see to it I can't tell

P a g e | 1191

whether I'm coming or going. The two of them are an enormous threat to my creative
concentration, my creative focus. My flow state. The times I'm in the zone.
I HATE having Cary and Peggy as roommates who continually conspire to disrupt my flow state
and creative focus.
This is The Beginning of the End of Doubting my Abilities.
I have everything I need (perspective, compositing, magical energy elixirs, Tiger Eye Gems,
Outlines, Chapter Starting Methods, The Power of Habit, Focus on Longer Durations and
Periods of Work) to proceed to conclusion of all my projects. Finishing ain't shit. I'm gonna
master that bitch.
Saturday, December 20th, 2014, 8:45 p.m.
2014 was my financial year. I maxed out my credit, invested in online trading, and gathered
capital to fund not only an app business, but an animated short film which is currently in
production overseas. And also, I got a $50 - $87 windfall from S.S.gov, allowance, and other
financial sources. Not gonna lie, in 2014 I had an unusual amount of prosperity and opportunity.
I even wrote a business proposal that ended up being carefully reviewed by the Microsoft
Executive Counsel. All that aside, I also got numerous job offers from a Silicon Valley Recruiter
based on my Stanford class time, and I got invited to pitch an animation concept to a Philippines
based studio executive. I got to do a lot of stuff this year.
Key Words

.gov
Microsoft
Silicon Valley
Palo Alto
Silicon Valley Recruiter
Tycoon Animation Inc.
Oliver Guse
Stanford University Online
Google Play Apps
Google Play
Desk
LinkedIn

P a g e | 1192

I was born a Scorpio INTP, on November 17th, 1983, at 3:12 a.m. in the morning smack dab in
the heart of one of the most Prestigious American Universities in all of the Northern states, The
Hospital of the University of Michigan, in Ann Arbor, Michigan, a short drive from the Canadian
Border.
You know, I used to have an actual desire to be rich and famous, until I learned the truth about
my own sacred nature, and the nature of wealth, fame, and popularity.
Wealthy, famous, popular people will be among the First Generation of Sinners Sent to Hell. A
recreational lifestyle with no suffering, but a lot of temptation sends you to Hell the Fastest. A
Life of Fame, Sex, Drugs, and Rock/Roll will send you to Hell almost as fast as if you
committed first degree murder or a hate crime.

I find there's little integrations and things here and there I'd like to add to or change about all my
favorite classic comics.
Tezuka is good with pacing and storytelling, but I find I can draw beyond that level.
Sin City is a good crime and film noir shadow notan drama comic-manga, but it could probably
work just as well, if not better, as a science-fiction-fantasy comic book (Franco-Belgian bandes
dessinee, with Invader Zim City Architecture and Backgrounds like my Pitch Party Entry, and
my newest piece, Mono Descending Rooftop in Perspective, like Blacksad or Moebius)
With Akira, leave as is but change to be like Akira, a vice versa version of what was done to Sin
City. Sin City meets Akira and Dragon Ball Z.
Or Dragon Ball Z meets Trigun Maximum, Priest, and Sin City. Power meets Style and
Ambiance.
Blade of the Immortal makes good use of Abstract Editing and Camera Cuts with lots of Abstract
close-ups and sword fights, but not enough negative space in the background, like I want to do
with my checkerboard notan patterns, like German pre-ww2 woodcuts and whatnot (still gotta
buy that book.
***
As for story, I'm thinking Savin Yeatman-Eiffel meets Leiji Matsumoto, which is kind of how
that influence inheritance works in the first place. Leiji Matsumoto influenced Eiffel on Oban,
which emotionally delivers a very high score on drama and emotional oomph and power.

P a g e | 1193

I was raised primarily by my mother, and she never lost hope. She always had a sense of
goodwill and hope about the future. Just like Obama! My circumstances were more unfair in
regards to my life and the conditions of my social situation. I grew up surrounded by cynics and
bullies who would target me above all others. Despite all the racism and racial oppressions
whites commit in this world, I too am part white, and I still believe it's important to smile and
laugh all the time and present a genuinely sunny disposition. There are ways to be happy without
coming across like a fucking idiot or condescending bully across the backyard fence hacking
into your Hard Drive with Trojans and whatnot. There are ways to avoid ending up like that guy:
The suicidal pessimist and emotionally envious and fragile bully. All you have to be is me. I've
also gotten pretty far on sarcastic humor and insincerity on Twitter and YouTube, two sites I
helped invent for the general public from their inception and all throughout their development
and beta phases. I help mainstreamize YouTube and Twitter. They would have ended up
NOTHING without my contributions and support, and wouldn't stand a chance of ruling the
world as Google has without my endorsement or support, because my opinion and endorsement
is powerful and influential like that, that it can make or break a Forbes level company. I GET
them to Bill Gates and Forbes level, as I am the tastemaker. I am the "You" in the Media.
Most Powerful Players
2014 List:
1. Moi', "J.M. Matthews"
2. Barack Obama (also a form of me)
3. Sean Akins
4. Chad and Steve
5. Larry Page
6. Anthony Wood
7. JJ Abrams
8. George RR Martin
9. Bryan Cranston
***

P a g e | 1194

Success isn't as complex as it seems. You might want a hit TV show, but in reality you have to
start small and do the work every day for a few years.
MOVIES! TV!
Examples: George Lucas, Mario Puzo, Quentin Tarantino, David Chase, Chris Carter.
How They Succeeded: They completed at least 1 draft (the first draft) of a finished, structured
screenplay and sold it to a movie studio with or without an agent.
Bottom Line: They did the formatted work. They completed a screenplay.
COMICS!
Examples: Ninja Turtles, Dave Sim, Jhonen Vasquez, Todd McFarlane, Jeff Smith, Frank
Miller.
How They Succeeded: They drew a series of comic book pages that led to comic book series.
Bottom Line: They did the formatted work: Drawing-Writing a Sequence of Comics and
Sequential Art.
NOVELS!
Examples: Stephen King, Michael Moorcock, J.K. Rowling, Dan Brown, George R.R. Martin
How They Succeeded: They completed at least 1 Novel, if not many, fully formatted and
structured, which they sold to an agency.
Bottom Line: They did the formatted work. The completed the novel's manuscript.

My invention, streaming video online

...Now accounts for 50% of All Internet Traffic In The World. According to a study of
YouTube/Netflix in 2013.
I'm successful now!! I'm influential now!! I'm every bit of the success I dreamed I'd be and
become. Minus the fame, glamour, money, or respect. But I made my impact. Because of my
ingenuity as an inventor of computer science and IT Technology, I'm one of the 50 most
influential people in the world. Unacknowledged, but still very real.

P a g e | 1195

Thursday, December 25th, 2014, 2:39 p.m.,

It's Christmas Afternoon, and I opened my gift from my parents around 4-5 hours ago.
Got the gift of music this year, 2014. I got my very first electric guitar and Amplification
Speaker. Damn that thing is loud. I got exactly what I wanted this year. An electric guitar to
write and perform songs with, just as soon as I learn how to play a bit better. Having a black
colored electric guitar is so cool though.
Got to wear in the new electric guitar a bit. I cranked up the volume and turned up the treble to
full, and surprisingly, on my first day of owning and possessing an electric guitar, I was
composing my first 1-2 minute long heavy metal riff.
I had a few influences that influenced that sound: The Rentals, Weezer, Rivers Cuomo, The
Presidents of the USA, Liam Lynch, and the Smashing Pumpkins. I like that grinding sound.
Now my mouth is watering at the thought of purchasing a fuzz box, for increased amplification,
and an even more electric sound. My first riff sounded plenty electric, but I can't even fathom
how good I might be at playing the guitar (Acoustic AND Electric) in 5 - 12 years from now
after a decade or half a decade of consistent practice and revisions.
Things I'd like to develop chops at:

Performing
Having a mini-concert for friends and family in my home
Performing at a public concert, and building upward
Singing
Songwriting
Playing Acoustic Folk
Playing Alternative Metal Garage Guitar (Electric)
Digital music editing and mixing

Things I need to buy:

A Microphone
Another Speaker (1 for mic, 1 for guitar)
A Mic Stand
A Music Stand for Tablature books
Music Editing and Engineering software

There's no reason to let my music and performance chops go to waste

Before, I never in a million years would have guessed I'd be a lead guitarist and/or lead singer of
a local or national concert to promote my album. Oh wait, actually I did foresee that. When I was

P a g e | 1196

young. A teenager. That was my career dream: Being a rock star. But for some reason it feels
more tangible and real now.
I am:

A Cartoonist
A Screenwriter
A Writer
A Musician

I have an inclination as a musician, toward performing vocal, acoustic, and electrical melody. A
mixture of hard and soft. On one track I sing a Lazy Town Stephanie lyrical ballad as though it
were a Broadway show tune, in the following tracks I'm doing some random strumming on the
guitar, and one track with hard metal shred riffs...just because I can. That and it sounds good. It
makes for an interesting mix.
But honestly this is only the beginning of my experimentation. I've got original lyrics to conceive
and write, then place those lyrics to my vocal chords and guitar riffs. I sense good things
emerging if I truly sit down or stand up and learn to play the guitar. I'd love to be the Frank
Zappa or Danny Elfman of the aught generation. Even though I'm not a normal composer. I don't
write notation. But you don't have to write notation just to be considered a composer. If you
create a song and its original, you're the composer of that song.
***
Friday, December 26th, 2014, 12:19 p.m.,
It took forever to get around to, but I finally got back in touch with my old middle school best
friends of all time, Chris and Jonny. They're not friends among themselves, but they're both my
best friends. They're loyal and likeable.
We've all kind of decided we'd like to keep in contact more often. Jonny is a drummer who
works at Downtown Disney, and Chris is working at a Sports Store up in North Carolina.
Rivalry is unhealthy really. I have no rivals. I'm not competing with anyone. No one can compete
with me. No one's good enough to do that yet, I'm proud to say. But I do have friends.
***

P a g e | 1197

Saturday, December 27th, 2014, 7:45 p.m.,

From now on, I'm going to divide up the time I spend on each of my webcomics and art sites
more equally. Including Blogger, Tumblr, Pixiv, Ink Blazers, Google+, and Comic Fury.
I've got a few methods for approaching this: All sites will include all the newer uploads for the
most part.
I'll be making a greater effort to produce more new artwork, and more comics artwork, that's
scripted, drafted up on separate pages, composited, and laid out beforehand.
It comes down to responsibility. Will I practice enough responsibility and labor to follow
through on my tasks I assign for myself.
"MONO: End Times: GENESIS" page 1 got 600 views online so far.
***
Sunday, December 28th, 2014, 12:40 a.m.,
So much power emerges from my sharpie pen when I draw backgrounds. I was watching
Evangelion 1.11 on Toonami, and it inspired me to sketch something, so I drew some sky
scrapers. So much power surged through my fragile little body. So much is riding on my success.
Suddenly fireworks were launching somewhere near bye on the next street over. I could feel the
excitement I was generating with my art, the raw power. But to be honest it was one of the most
painful strenuous clerical acts I've ever occupied myself with. Every muscle in my upper body
tensed up, and Baby my pet cat jumped onto my chest in mid-session, her claws digging into the
bare skin exposed on my wrist. Unbelievably painful. But the pain was worth it, as when I
finished I had a Blade runner level drawing. I'll scan it tomorrow when I'm more awake.
I will NOT let Joey Manley and WCN's death have happened in vain. They believed in me when
certain other people didn't. So I lived up to my art's potential, if only for a moment, and my art's
seismic power was unleashed everywhere around me, if only for a moment. It was incredibly
PAINFUL. And I had to strain half the muscles in my body to do it. Especially my hands, wrists,
stomach, and arms. Excruciatingly so, but sometimes the Art of Progress and Hope are WORTH
the pain one must endure to achieve them.
I know it might be a bit of a stretch to say this, but aren't fireworks usually used to celebrate
things. Were those local nearby fireworks launched when I was drawing to commemorate my
spirit of creativity, quality, and large scale innovation. A Quality American Product? My comics,
the local legend? Someone was celebrating me putting something down on paper to express
myself freely and with great passion? Just for me? Really?? Well at least someone's glad I'm still
drawing comics in the land of Freedom. I wouldn't normally admit this, but I guess that could be

P a g e | 1198

a good thing. Being celebrated by means other than mere words. The quiet Midnight December
28th explosion of fireworks to commemorate my art? Just a theory.
***
Well, my webcomics career is taking off. According to The Webcomics List, my comic is ranked
917th in popularity. It's listed in the top 1,000 most popular comics out of the 23,000 webcomics
listed, and my WCN URL receives around 1,200 views a month through The Webcomics List.
The Amazon Kindle version of the first few End Times comic-manga moved 37 units in April of
2014. Why my books and comics sold so many copies in April and only that month I'm still
trying to figure out.
***
Foreshortening and Contours
Been experimenting with some art and design panel composition techniques for
illustrating the interaction of background and foreground and certain props. This is a
kind of interaction between characters and foreground that isn't really taught in
books. It's more of a "school of hard knocks thing". I picked it up by studying
popular pre-existing comic books like Naruto and Akira with lots of detail and
detailed intereaction between background and character body parts interacting with
pieces of the foreground, like a hand holding onto railing of a balcony, or a hand
steering a steering wheel, or various ways foreground props both large and small like
cars and chairs and desks can interact with the character by overlapping the
characters silhouette. Or having the character overlapping them, like a chair or desk
or file cabinet or door or staircase, or balcony, or rooftop, etc., etc., etc. The
first thing that needs to be drawn is the part that's connecting with the background,
holding onto props, being overlapped, or overlapping the object. In this sense, 2
contours will function as one extra large irregular shape. The integration of the
person and object, or the object and person needs to start being drawn where the
contours touch, or where the objects themselves interact and touch. This is ultimate
foreshortening.

***
Things to work on in my comics, (that I never explored in Art Manifested)

Compositing between character and landscape (especially for aerial shots / Establishing
Shots)
Feet, Hands, and Outline: Contour Overlap (for dialogue panels)
***

P a g e | 1199

There,
I finally outgrew my "hero worship phase". Admiring my personal art heroes and their careers, as
opposed to what is sitting right there laid out in the pages. I admire the comic book pages and
panels, not the career of the person who made them. Paying too much attention to manga-ka and
creators and auteurs and graphic novelist filmmakers really can detract from your dedication to
the science of your panel and page construction. You're placing far too much focus on the wrong
thing: The financial success and stature of the artist who drew the thing, as opposed to the things
that they draw and how they did it. It's never a good thing to admire the glamour of comics
making too much. It can set you up, make you a weak comics art panelist. All I care about is
what goes onto the page itself, not romanticizing the status, career, and life of the men who got
to that level. You don't achieve another creator's level of success by fantasizing about being
them. I used to do that. You achieve that success by learning from their panel art and page
layouts and ideas as they are realized with pencil and ink, slowly, over decades of time.
I drew a total of 200-300 pages of varying levels of quality over the last 4-6 years, between 2007
through 2014. Starting in 2015, I'm aiming to apply all my newer techniques, and take my
comics making efficiency to new levels of quality. 24-Hour Comics? Maybe. 24-Day Comics?
Maybe. The goal is 250 pages of comics a year. That's 500 pages in the next 2 years, by the
beginning of 2018, or the age of 33, and 1,000 in the next 4 years by the age of 35. I'm finally
starting to feel a little comfortable in my comics making skin. I've been making comics for over
20 years so far non-professionally. I just went pro with comics in 2013, seeing as I got my own
press release and a listing in Amazon Kindle eBook Stores.
I find comics work to be very different from animation and co-pro work. Both involve sitting at a
desk, but the difference is in the workload mostly. Both jobs involve working with art as it
progresses over time, but...
In comics you're more accountable. You're forced to resort to the lowest common denominator,
and are forced to do all of the drawings yourself.
In animation, you work with a small army of artists and staff, and the producer and studio owner
works as the middle man on the film. And they're all working from your scripts and design bible
you built, by using it more as a guiding light to steer the factory/ship. You don't have as much
input on production as one might think you would with indie animation studios overseas.
Communication is kept to a minimal. You kind of sit in a chair in your office and learn to relax
and let the production artists come through on their end and do their part of the job. Then you
pay them their production costs and they all go home.
***

P a g e | 1200

Monday, December 29th, 2014, 2:38 p.m.,

Things Bandes Dessinee is good for:

Architecture
Beautiful Women
Rugged Heroes
Heroic Fantasy
Dark Fantasy
Science Fiction
An Elaborate Designy Feel
A similar Structure To Manga
Epic Settings and Storylines
Cities and Metropolises

This Master Builder 22 is Building a Master Bank Account.

Master Builder Builds a Master Bank Account
Sites to update credit card info on everytime I get payment by credit or check:

Bank of America
Paypal
GreenDot
NetSpend
Amazon
Fidelity
Adwords
RentAnime.com

Types of Credit and Debit Cards I Own:

Bank of America - Mastercard

US Bank - Visa
Chase Freedom - Visa
Chase Slate - Visa
Greendot - Visa
Netspend - Mastercard / Visa
***

P a g e | 1201

Tuesday, December 30th, 2014, 12:17 a.m.,

Okay, I finally seemed to have developed some direction for my silly comic book world.
And as the saying goes, you can make stories out of characters, not concepts, so I'm developing
my character motivations to fill each scene with, whether it's the good guys talking to good guys,
good guys talking to bad guys, or bad guys talking to bad guys. This is gonna be awesome. I'd
like to do a grid layout map of my Noah sequence I've been developing character motivation and
a story concept for. The story is the camera kind of Follows Noah Around as he interacts with
various S.O.7. employees in his office, intermixed with varying camera depths and positions of
the camera as it hovers across the room and over head, as we get to observe what a "normal"
work day for Noah is like.
Okay, the start of that intro dialogue comic is finished. The early development of the strip is
finished. I drew all the characters and concept panels I'm starting off with.
I also counted how many comic book pages I drew in 2014. If I round it off to the nearest
hundred, and count all the pages I destroyed or threw away along with the good pages, I
completed a total of somewhere in the neighborhood of 300 pages of panels in 2014 for the year.
Ideally I'd like to draw at least 1 comics page a day, as opposed to 1 page or more a week. 500
pages each year from 2015 onward.
***
I'm slowing down on my work. I've come down with a cold, and it's hard to focus or stay upright.
I did in fact complete 6 development pages of panels and sketches for my End Times series, but
barely. I really lurched through it, meaning I felt like shit while doing it, the whole time. But I
must be getting more disciplined and attaining a higher level of will power, seeing as my level of
habit, compulsion, and discipline for hitting the books with art (not just journals and writing) is
getting stronger.
New Years Eve,
Wednesday, December 31st, 2014,
My new year's resolution is to be more prolific at drawing comics pages than ever before.
500 pages every year. A page a day or every other day, if not a page an hour.
Based on the analytics of Google+ community, and ComicsFury (webhost), for my comics
profiles on both sites: For Page 1, I got 600 views total. For Page 2, I got 700 views total.
So for Issue No one of MONO: End Times GENESIS, I got 1,300 views, which is roughly the
equivalent of the sales figure units sold for Cerebus and TMNT issue Number 1. I achieved the
same readership figures as those two series, and that's just for 2 pages. Off to a good start.

P a g e | 1202

If I count the total stats for GENESIS on ComicFury (300 views)

& all my views on Google Plus (1,100 views)
= 1,400 views, or fourteen hundred views
Honestly I don't really care about the new year all that much. I care about my strategy for
working through next year, which I am eager to get started on. The sooner that clock gets to
2015, the sooner I can move onto putting more work into my life in general.
***
Thursday, January 1st, 2015, 12:42,
Well. It's finally 2015 technically. I'm going back to work ASAP.
I have 70 combined total filler pages or so of finished design, illustration, and comic book work
to use as filler for my webcomic series, while I work on new material behind the scenes.
I update my webcomics 3 days a week (Tuesday, Thursday, and Saturday, all in the early
morning and afternoon).
If I do the math, I realize I already have enough comics and art to upload every Tuesday,
Thursday, and Saturday, Well Into 2015 until around at least June or July of 2015. I'll have a lot
of new material to publish by then.
End Times is going along at a pretty good rate. I'm averaging around 100 viewers per page, for
each upload on average. The only online comics audience of mine that can rival that is Google+
Hangout Anime Community, where I get around 500 views per page on average. I'm keeping my
rate to 3 page uploads to ComicFury a week. Their system is obviously working better than
Webcomics Nation, or WCN's did.
Having a readership for my webcomic is a pretty big motivator and incentive to keep the habit
up, to relish the times and days I debut and upload my work, to keep publishing, writing, and
drawing new stories. True, I had to start off with little to no audience, but I think that era of my
life, the one with 0 people in the audience, has passed. A lot of the websites I got to give me a
more mainstream quantity of audience numbers, and viewer and readership statistics for my
videos, books, art, writing, comics, music, animation, blog entries, and short stories. It creates a
nice feedback loop, and creates an incentive and motivation to keep on keeping on, that a ghost
town audience wouldn't foster. I call it the "ghost town effect". The more of a ghost town you're
operating, the less positive and critical feedback you get, and the less inclined and
disenfranchised you become with your place in the world, meaning the motivation (that an
audience would otherwise bring you) just isn't there. We all benefit from honest feedback and
support of some kind.

P a g e | 1203

I see a lot of anthologies in my future. Man-thology.

I'm working on:

Short and Long Comics Anthologies

Short and Long Fiction Anthologies
Apps
Animated film / TV Demo Reel
Online TV Networks
Scripts

Places where my comic series can be found (online anyway):

Amazon
Webcomics Nation
The Webcomic List
Comic Fury
Ink Blazers
Google+ Profile
Blogger
Comic Rocket

By some miracle, I pulled it off. I'm getting really, really good at writing fiction of all lengths,
and drawing-writing comics and animation. By some miracle I almost feel like I've attained liftoff by now. I'm on the verge of breaking through to the mainstream. And it's all thanks to the
attention brought to me by webcomics and the internet. Right now I'm just flirting with the
mainstream and mainstream level success, on what seems like a lower level connection. But it's
still a cut and draft above where I was! Art-Manifested, Spindack, SplitAtomBoom, Druidon,
and StreamWave Apps are nothing to sneeze at.
I've done a pretty good job of using self-journalism to chronicle my own life, persona, and
career, both online and on word processor and print.
Ugh. I don't know what's up with Jim Mahfood. I don't know if he fried his brain with all that
weed, but his new designs are so sloppy and ugly compared to what he was doing circa 20002001. Those early works had a closure and tight polish to them he seems to have lost over the
years. I don't know what happened. He drew Tank Girl and that seemed really good, but nowhere
near as polished as what Jamie Hewlett did with it. I miss the kind of stuff he drew for Oni Press
at the beginning of his career. I do NOT like his new style. It's a mess. Maybe he would have
been better off staying in the shadows. I hope that doesn't happen to me if I get that big.

P a g e | 1204

I'm not compelled to make money in the same way your average tech programmer or developer
is. I'm a lot more concerned about consequences and taking action. I'm a genius who is on the
right side of history, too, but I lack a lot of the greed we see in Silicon Valley that's been
happening in the last 25 years.
Saturday, January 3rd, 2015, 11:40 p.m.,
I realized something. I'm doing a webcomic that will eventually be anthologized as a book or
graphic novel or trade paperback, say 200-400 pages. I used to do the most fretting over how I
was going to begin and end my Post-Apocalyptic saga, like how would Mono kill Nosferatu, and
how had the world of New Earth come to be. But that is what text cards are for. No need to fill
the space with anything elaborate. I'm good enough to continue on as it is. All I have to do is
start at the quasi-beginning, quasi-middle, and keep the camera rolling, keep following my
characters around on camera as they solve problems, fight baddies, demons, thugs, and terrorists,
and go on missions. Half of the story is in the visual sense of power and fighting, not plot and
dialogue. That's the other half: Casual carefully crafted conversation that movie the story along
when visuals don't convey the whole story and message. It's gonna get progressively more
awesome with the more I work on it. Or I could focus on keeping the quality even and consistent,
and merely repeating what I've done so far in my art book and comics pages. Exciting.
Unfortunately, making my deadline and sticking to my new schedule implies I will need to
double my drawing and workload efforts just to break even in terms of page count. Truth is, I did
not draw that many pages that I'd actually want to re-use, so I gotta make some new pages.
***
Sunday, January 4th, 2015, 3:22 p.m.,
One important thing I learned from working on comics assignments for lessons with Tom Hart,
about comics drawing, is that a lot of each panels layouts are perfected by drawing them over
and over again in preliminary sketches and thumbnails. My average is between 4 to 25 drawings
per panel, if you're being serious about it. Tom really cranked out my newly established work
ethic. I've got to be sure not to lose that thumbnail and panel layout sketch work ethic. Every
page's artwork and each panel needs to be redrawn time and time again, as well as cleaned up,
polished, and edited on computer graphics software.
Techniques to work on:

Transferring Pilot TV Script to Comic Book Script (The How To Change it to One)
Contour Overlap (props in foreground)
Checkerboard Negative Space Composition, Background Spot Blacks
Laying out Panels
Drawing each detail of a panel multiple and numerous times.
More Time Spent Working on An Art Means More Detail
Hatching to fill space
Focus results in quality action. Distraction results in action of poor quality.

P a g e | 1205
I've got some elements of my comic book production techniques to memorize and
internalize and turn into a habit, slowly over time at first, then quickly and with
easy access. Kind of like the way I draw ears and triangular rectangles.
Those things include, but aren't limited to:

Laying out pages and drawing multi-page thumbnail panel layouts to map out
where I'm going and how I'm going to get there.
Adapting a TV animation script to a comic book - manga script
Incorporating contour overlap between props-characters in panel layouts and
thumbnail layout maps.
Adding spot blacks to my trenchcoat geometry and background skies
Drawing the same image or panel prop (object, subject matter) a million times
Hatching to add detail to both spot blacks compositions and white compositions
Building up my mental energy and stamina to focus on what I'm doing when I'm
drawing...At all Times! Forever, nonstop! Even for up to 3 minutes or an hour
at a time if necessary. Never lose track of what I'm doing. Put mindfulness
into all my lines, not just some of them

***
Tuesday, January 6th, 2014, 2:38 p.m.,
I went to the gym a short while ago, and signed up for a membership. In terms of wanting to get
in shape and lose weight in 2015, so far so good. I got my keycard and everything. Next time I
go I'm gonna start working out and working on shaping up my leg and arm muscles. Most of the
people there were using the treadmills and stair climbers.
The world has turned into such a happier more peaceful place, now that Bin Laden and Fat
Hitler: Brian aren't running around on the loose. Now that those guys are locked away and dead,
everyone can resume living in happiness and peace, at least for a good long while.
***
Thursday, January 8th, 2014, 12:01,
For the first time in my life, I've created a business with a tangible pay system. Amazon is selling
my company's streaming anime app: ActionToonTV Mobile for a very reasonable price. Easy to
afford and easy to use. Amazon approved and sanctioned the very thing Google banned and
suspended my Google Play app for. I had to give up a lot to make my dreams happen. Like
getting banned and suspended from my very own Google Play app. But fortunately, Amazon
saved me. And my bank account and credit cards! Now I'm a legitimate businessperson, with a
legitimate and legal business model. I finally did it! I'm selling my app! Oh happy day. I should
throw a party or something.

P a g e | 1206

I'm doing a lot lately.

I'm writing Scripts, Fiction, and Short Fiction.

I'm outlining scripts for comics and animation.
I'm tweeting to a massive audience.
I'm getting my app back online and into stores.
I'm launching my Amazon Android App Store.
I'm drawing comics that I'm turning into webcomics.
I'm publishing webcomics.
I'm blogging.
I'm posting on old school ASMB Message Boards.
I'm running my network and small media business, ActionToonTV & ActionToonTV
Mobile.
I'm visiting the gym, first to sign up and become a member, now to work out and lose
some weight.
I'm being a musician and practicing singing and music.
I'm reading books and novels.
I'm balancing my credit card debt and budget.
I'm producing a short animated film.

Whew. How do I sleep? Oh right: Coma pills. Purple coma pills or prison time. I choose! Pick
your poison, son.
***
My app is now available in the Amazon Apps Shop. I moved 2 units in the first day. I got a little
windfall from those moved units, too, so things are going well for me. Very well. I cleared all the
more dangerous hurdles when I found safe harbor on Amazon, and they approved my streaming
video app, ActionToonTV Mobile. I'm $5 richer now. I know it might be hard for 1 or 2 people
to believe, but I'm actually turning out to be very successful at enterprising as an appreneur, or
entrepreneur of apps.
I'd still like to know who planted the remote access hidden camera spyware virus in my old
laptop without my knowledge or consent a few years back. Ho-hum. Apparently they felt entitled
to publish their footage to a mole website illegally, yet go to great lengths to keep me in the dark
about the whole incident. Why would you go to such great lengths to insure I'm not aware that is
what you are attempting to do? I wonder...hmmm. I suppose the Obama Administration and
FBIG cybercriminal investigation unit could always monitor his website accounts, hack his IP
Address and email, along all comments made online regarding the incident and the sites hosting
them (adult swim message boards, Yahoo chatrooms, Cartoon Network, NBC Universal,
MSNBC, megatokyo, encyclopeadia dramatica, 4chan) to deduce who is aware of it, and

P a g e | 1207

investigate / hack into and spy on their I.P. addresses and email activities, too. But that is wishful
thinking. Whoever talks about it, knows about it.
Saturday, January 10th, 2015, 2:03 p.m.,
I'm now LinkedIn friends with Gonzo Digimation Founder / Executive Producer Shinichiro
Ishikawa. Whoa! A powerful, powerful, INCREDIBLY POWERFUL contact and connection in
the Japanese anime world and industry. That's quite impressive.
I sent Shin a thank you message through LinkedIn, and he was very gracious and courteous
toward me. I couldn't believe it! I'm so in awe of him and awestruck of the fact I'm
corresponding with someone so powerful.
He wrote the following:
Dear J.M.
Thank you for your interest in our products!
It is always a great surprise that people elsewhere in the world could be connected
through what we creates.
Whenever you have the chance to come to Tokyo, do not hesitate to contact me again!
Best regards,
Shin

***
That's a wrap, people! Let's call it a Chapter! Back tomorrow with more amateur hour haxor
hijinx and shenanigans! Bye fools!

P a g e | 1208

Chapter 20

P a g e | 1209

Sunday, January 11th, 2015, 8:32 a.m.,

"The next point which is important to emphasize for you, Joseph, is that due to the very strong
interaction between Jupiter going through your natal chart and taking into account the position
of Mercury there is a strong link between your professional and career sector with the
friendship, mutual understanding. It seems like success in one of them will nourish success in the
other one. During 2015 you will meet a person (I cannot tell for now if you already know this
person or not, this point needs to be explored in a more detailed report) that will push you
towards an important opportunity in your career sector, and thus giving you the chance to find
more friends in your professional environment, who in their turn will open more and more
chances for further professional development. The crucial thing here is not to miss out this
encounter with the person who will actually start this so-called "chain reaction" and for this you
will need to be in the right place at the right time and act in a very precise manner, so that you
can benefit from this chance to get your professional success to the next level!"
-Jenna
My personal Astrologer in France, 2015 Winter Reading

That "person" turned out to be foreigner-friendly patron saint, Gonzo Studio Founder Shinichiro
Ishikawa. The prophecy indeed proved to be accurate! And here I thought you couldn't MEET
anyone cooler than the people I've already met.
PIZZA STEEEEEEVE!!!!!
So. I get to CONTINUE bein' awesome! Good for me!!!
I just became 50% cooler by proxy. Because of who I know now, I'm not just a "fan of anime"
and "otaku" anymore. I am anime. I live and breathe anime. I live a life of anime. The fact that I
live in Orlando Florida is no matter. It's no different than living in New York or Los Angeles.
Hair straight or curly. Japanese or American. Young or old. White or multiracial. Ishikawa is
aware I live in Orlando, and doesn't seem to mind one bit. He's an unprejudiced man of
tolerance, who supports me. That prejudice is largely perceived and not actually real. Anime is
for everyone, including people in Orlando and Seminole County (where I grew up). But I'd love
to take Ishikawa up on his offer to visit Tokyo and continue speaking to him. He reminds me of
Ozu on Kappa Mikey. I love that show ha.
True anime is tolerant. And Teaches Tolerance. Anime is a Medium and Genre of Peace and
Harmony. Sure there is violence, but it is mythological and archetypal.
***
My outdoor social plans for 2015? Go to the movies and the gym. A lot. Make going to the
theatre fun and enjoyable again. Get back in shape. I wasn't always obese. When I was young,

P a g e | 1210

like, 7 years old, I played sports and was thin and in shape. I was lean. I could actually walk
around in photos with flat pectorals, a flat stomach, and my shirt off. I looked like a normal kid.
Now because of all that horribly illegal narcotherapy my parents coerced me into with false
claims of a misdiagnosis of schizophrenia (the "voices" didn't exist. It was just the voices of
"ghost" neighbors across the wall talking to me through the walls of my house, trying to get
inside my head and play "games" with me, just to mess with me. They still attempt it, but I'm
more than ready for them.).
Charlie Hebdo is the best thing that ever happened to me! It drew much needed spotlight to my
cause as a International Franco-Belgian Bande Dessinee Tome cartoonist, just like my mentors
Thomas Romain and Savin Yeatman-Eiffel. Demolished terrorism in Europe, and united a
continent against Muslim Fundamentalists who are the opposite of what I represent: Peace.
Apparently, Steve Blum writes and talks about me in private. A LOT. Awesome! Awesome
dude. Equally awesome obsession.
"All I wanna do is rock shows in Tokyo"
-Richie Branson
Ways to promote one's Amazon App:
(uncrossed = Back in Action!... - March, 2015

ActionToonTV.com
Ustream.com
Twitter ActionToonTV
Twitter JM Matthew
Android Forums
Adwords Campaigns
Google+ Accounts
YouTube Commercial
Potential Upcoming Video
Amazon Android Article
News Article Comments Sections
LinkedIn Data
Amazon.com App Store

Whoopsee! I guess I mistook scumbags for corporate Amerikkka there for a second.

P a g e | 1211

Tuesday, January 13th, 2015, 1:44 P.M.

I just got back from spending 15 minutes exercising and working out on the gym equipment at
Planet Fitness. I was pretty surprised I lasted more than 10 minutes, but the TV's on the roof
helped. I lifted weights with my legs and my arms, and did the cycling machine. Gyms don't just
have fit people. There were fat AND fit people at Planet Fitness. Gyms aren't just for looking
perfect. They're also for losing weight, burning fat, and getting in shape. Living healthier.
I actually like the gym. I like cycling and lifting the bars on strength training equipment. I was a
little afraid working out might be painful, but surprisingly using my legs and arms (but especially
legs) to use strength training equipment was not that uncomfortable. I hate doing pushups and
situps, as they're incredibly uncomfortable. But on the strength training machines, I was lifting
up to 55 lbs.! I started off easy, at 10 lbs. but lifting the 10 lbs. bars didn't feel challenging to my
legs or arms at all. So I went up to 25 lbs. - 45 lbs.. 10 lbs. actually felt very light. Lighter than I
remember, maybe because I'm a full grown adult now.
I finally found a way to work out my quadriceps. My quads! I sit down on the couch, put my
elevated, straightened legs up, rest my feet on the coffee table, with my heels propping up my
feet. And I squeeze my quad muscles as hard as I can! It's a total home post-gym workout. I
could literally feel the fat on my legs, dying, and all I had to do was sit there and watch TV! It
felt...SO...GOOD! You can literally feel your quad muscles tightening, and burning fat content!
When you work out, it helps you a million times over to target specific muscles and muscle areas
of the body. I want to target my quads, gluts, torso, and pectorals.
Muscle names are important to physical fitness. Just like you need to learn each note and string
and fret of a guitar on its fret board before you can play anything melodic, you need to know the
names of the muscles your targeting to become leaner. It doesn't hurt! It's fun! Isometric exercise
is right up my alley. I LOVE isometric exercise!
Just finished practicing and playing guitar. Acoustic guitar, not electric. I'm going to keep
playing acoustic, and keep playing acoustic, with no amplifier or electricity, until I get the hang
of it and master the basics and fundamentals and basic notes and chords of acoustic guitar a little
bit more, then(!) I will pick up the electric guitar and learn that. I have 2 (count em', 2!) guitars, 1
electric and 1 acoustic, and each one has its own set of charms. I think working out and
exercising at the gym made me a better, faster, more effective guitarist. I had an easier time than
usual, getting through the chord progressions.
I was also tempted to draw more comic book pages and focus on that, just to see if I can handle
that too.
Damn. Exercise makes you better at EVERYTHING!

P a g e | 1212

I'm also starting to get rid of the calluses on my feet, by, when I shower, placing the shower head
on the floor of the tub so the water sprays up by about a foot, like a miniature sprinkler, and
rinsing the bottom of my feet, now that I can lift them up a little.
And my thighs are already starting to look thinner and leaner, in less than one day.
The exercise helped not only with my music, but my writing, and artwork. I've never had such an
easy time replicating the style of my old drawings or putting the work in to fill in details. Even
though I kept Jen relatively simple, under normal circumstances, drawing her would include a lot
of work. But I didn't even feel the need to sweat it. I lifted up the junk pile blocking my drawing
desk in my office, cleaned it up a bit, and hit the drawing desk. I dove right in. I drew Jen first,
cuz there was an older sketch of her I had for reference, and I liked the dual wield notan comic
book page, so I drew her white paper style first, then I coated and layered the drawing with my
black paper notan technique.
Here is the result...

Jen-Jen James of Team S.O.7

Very slick. Sleek and smooth. Nice silky black.

P a g e | 1213

I built up more energy, stamina, and momentum today than any other day in my entire life.
I also used a meditative exercise to heal myself of my sexual trauma and anxiety I've been
projecting from my subconscious mind based on an incident in my youth when I didn't know
anything about sexuality, and was a preteen. What people project on you is a symptom of
subconscious guilt you've built up over time from mistakes you made in the formative years of
your past. So if you want to heal, you have to meditate on your early mistakes. If visual images
of those mistakes come up in your mind during meditation, let them, embrace them for a while,
and just let yourself remember them, learning not to judge yourself for them. Of course you'll
never make a mistake that big again now that you're a grown man, but your subconscious mind
keeps trying to suppress that memory, making you a magnet for a long magnetic line of incidents
with people attempting to do to you what you did when you were 12 or 13 or 14 or whatever to
someone else, that you didn't know you had overcome and would never actually do again, but
think and assume you would, which is what triggers the events other people react to by being
drawn to on a hidden subliminal unconscious level. The one time victimizer or preteen kid who
made an honest mistake becomes the victim of people who have similar problems over time later
on. The sooner you can accept what YOU did when you were a kid, preteen, or teenager or
whatever, the sooner people with similar baggage will stop attempting to unconsciously
projecting their similar problems onto you repeatedly over time. That is how it stops. This can
apply to anything - death, sex, insecurity, fear, paranoia, bullying, awkwardness, negativity,
abuse, aggression, arrogance, criminal offenses, felonies or inappropriate actions. Not all of these
apply to me. Would they all to ANYONE? The principle underlying how they manifest in your
subconscious mind as you age, and fester and harbor themselves in your guilt or the parts of
yourself (mostly likely your less than admirable actions and guilt at a young age) as you age and
mature and grow into an adult. I read that in my Energy Vampires book. About how, what, and
why, the reasons certain types of energy vampires are drawn to you. You get in what you put out,
and no one likes confessing up to this part. But you must if you are going to heal and stop
attracting energy vampires. Guilt is what makes you not want to acknowledge the bad things you
used to put out, and probably are still putting out if the issue isn't resolved in your spirit and
unconscious mind. It's okay. You can accept it. And accept the part of you that did it, if you can
entirely love yourself and learn from it at the same time.
I wrote an online anti-copyright anti-corporate essay online today, and published it as a website.
"In Socialism We Trust". I made no bones about how I feel about anime pirating, profiting from
anime pirating, copyright restrictions, and free enterprise, and how the three former are a threat
to the potential of the latter system. Fight the Power.
I don't think I even WANT money anymore. If money wants me, it knows where to find me.
Screw working for it. Fuck that noise. I have a house, I have a place to live, I have food on my
table. If people are conspiring against my finances and art career, it's a good thing my energy
level is unstoppable and I'm losing weight. I got a WONDERFUL parting gift! My health,

P a g e | 1214

energy, courage, strength, and vitality back. Things like that. The positive perception of myself,
is more powerful and effective than money.
***
Wednesday, January 14th, 2014
I did another straight no-stop 18 minutes of isometric exercises and quad-squats in my living
room earlier today, but I already wrote that in my daily accomplishment log.
Now that my Ustream machine is banned from the internet for copyright claims from
Funimation, despite the fact it's only been 2 days this ordeal has gone on for, I'm a fast adjuster,
I'm a fast adapter. Hyper-Adapter. I've already moved onto bigger better things. Like returning to
webcomics at full power. Sometimes I will go weeks without posting-uploading, and other times
I'll upload every other day, and in rare instances (to shake things up), uploading numerous times
a day: Up to five or more.
Those Ft. Lauderdale cruise ships look AMAZING! And so much fun! I want to go! One day I'm
going to take one of those cruise ships across the Atlantic. The boarding area is incredibly
crowded and well secured. You need access cards. That makes me feel a lot more comfortable
about it, like it's not so scary anymore. Just vast and enormous. Not scary like the bridges in
Cocoa Beach. It's a hotel and luxury apartment on water. Amazing!
I could make a living on Piracy, if the anime community wasn't so polluted by the socialist
outsourcers, the Vizs and Funimations of the world.
Well I'm going to fight anime outsourcing with American made webcomics made from scratch.
The more I work out at Planet Fitness, the easier it will be.
Thursday, January 15th, 2015, 8:18 p.m.,
Comics Update Day today, if I'm up to it...and if I'm not too busy and occupied with life.
I have the following:

A Drawing Strategy
A Narrative Strategy
A Storytelling Strategy
A Panel and Page Layout Strategy
An Editing Strategy
An Uploading Strategy
A Publishing and Distribution Strategy

I have a strategy for every element and phase of my comics career now. All the parts I never
planned out for in the past, like editing and panels.

P a g e | 1215

The better the Planning Stage, the Better the Final Illusion will Look on the Page.
The Better the Plan, The Greater The Illusion.
***
Don't talk to me. You will only get in my way. And you need to get the FUCK out of THAT
thing.
***
How to Rap:
Rapping is a mixture of talking, speaking individual one liner sentences in sequence, and
matching your words and voice to rhythm and music. First you need something to say. Lines and
lyrics, with syllables that match the beat.

Best To Compete With (Rivals or Allies with most raw skill)

Bone
Scud
Sin City / Batman / Spawn / Paul Pope
Jean Giraud / Blade Runner / Ridley Scott / Pre-WWII Germany Expressionism
Francois Schuiten / Noir / Italian Renaissance / Notan
W.I.T.C.H.
Enki Bilal
Jodorowski
OTOMO
GloomCookie
HP Lovecraft
Courtney Crum
Dark Minds
Gold Diggers
Blade of the Immortal
Akira
Dragonball Z
Naruto
Bleach
Cerebus - Dave Sim
Greg Capullo
Jamie Hewlett and Tank Girl
Thomas Romain

P a g e | 1216

LeSean Thomas
Raynart
WXY Zell
Kristy (bad tude AND good ability!)
DA dawt cawm, Video Games
Tron Uprising, Motorcity, Titmouse, Star Wars: Rebels, Feature Animation
The Clone Wars
George Lucas Star Wars, Hollywood, Tarantino
Min-Woo Hyung
TMNT / Old Frank Miller / Old Bruce Timm / Old DC Anime / 90s / Italian Renaissance
Anime Studios: Production I.G., Xebec, Satelight Inc., Viz, Toei, Tokyo, Hong Kong,
Paris France, Bande Dessinee, Gainax

Easy Comics to Rival:

JtHM
Lenore
Blue Monday
SLG
Oni Press
MegaDoucheCrap
Top Shelf
Pixar
The Simpsons
Family Guy
Nickelodeon
New Frank Miller
New Bruce Timm
New DC Anime
Tim Burton
Almost All TV: Fox, NBC, Nick, CN, Disney (Most of their original material is inferior
in quality to mine for the most part)
***

The fans might get pissed about this (not that I give a fuck, but just saying...), but in terms of
where I'm headed, my cartooning (and any money made from it) is secondary to my health and
losing weight and keeping strong and in shape. My fitness regime. If a fatso destined for endless

P a g e | 1217

heart attacks, like Fred Gallagher, can get away with it on a comic as POP-ular as Megatokyo,
so can I on a comic as UNPOP-ular as mine. I am the Un-Pop. The king of Un-Pop.
I know how to track, report, and hunt local hackers now, who attempt to gain access to me and
my father's computers and gather intelligence and data on me and use it against me. It's amazing
what one little YouTube tutorial will teach you about how to track and report and block local
LAN (Local Area Network) and WAN (Wide Area Network) hackers from reaching your
sensitive information and wreak havoc with it.
***
Well, after a couple days of chaos, I reported my entire NEIGHBORHOOD To the police, for
hacking, stalking, hate speech, unauthorized intrusion on my PC, harassment, bullying,
cyberbullying, and marijuana possession and dealing. One of the happiest days of my life when
the 8 local police officers showed up in my house to take notes on my case and helped me file a
report. I filed a report with the police against my neighbors, for bullying and harassment, and a
whole host of other violations and crimes. Essentially for defining and being the definition of
drug-using evil. This neighborhood might be going to hell, but fortunately I'm helping to prevent
that part way. I also told them about me reporting YouTube's content system to the FBI, My
neighbor installing a webcam in my house with his SSID, Brian Johnston's run in and sordid and
aggressively violent history with myself, and everything that goes on in my neighborhood. I also
know what the disgruntled neighborhood "ghost" neighbor looks like now. I even handed the
police a picture of him, so they'll know who to look for. Go me! I also told them about how
Casselberry's moral standing has slowly collapsed into shit over time, and how the bad evil
neighbors that don't want to be discovered or seen have the nickname in the media are "ghosts",
how Death Note and Naoki Urasawa's Monster are based on me and him, how Brian Johnston
tried to implicate me as a false label ("pedophile") because I look at teenager websites, and how
Brian Johnston's original debut as a criminal and his whereabouts when he first attacked me
actually started in a night school film class in Orlando Florida that he and I both attended in a
chance encounter at the same time, and how Brian moonlighted as a police officer and would
report people to the FBI with their own computer data he stole with trojan horses in an attempt to
practice hacking, spying, mole-role playing, police officer, and social engineering including
doing it on this very computer (Dad's computer), and frame them with false evidence just to
attack them with the weapon of public opinion, and how I created streaming video and wrote
over 6,000 pages of books. And how when the psychiatric hospital admitted me to protect me
from Brian me, they used me to bait him and get him to issue an unknowing identifying
confession so they could verify I was indeed his victim and he was trying to kill me.
My confession to the police of all these problems I've had made me feel like there was a lot of
private pain and suffering being let go, stuff I had been holding in that was all lingering. I told
them Brian started this all. All the weird things happening around here, he likely incited it all.
What with One Piece's and Casselberry's ORIGINAL Hyena and ghost, Bellamy Caligula, who I

P a g e | 1218

forgot to mention to the police. The house owned by a 12 year old and its previous owner who
started the chain reaction. "PICK IT UP!"
***
Not much to talk about. Well, not much that I'm WILLING to talk about anyway. What? And
open myself up for attack on TV and online with Viacom and ASMB and DA? Don't think so.
My info shall stay on paper and on credit cards, where it belongs.
I'm glad I don't rely on or need TV financially anymore. TV is made by RICH people for POOR
people. Only poor people actually watch a lot of TV. All my clients are rich, and it doesn't seem
like any of them WATCH Nickelodeon or Cartoon Network. They're people with disposable
income, and lots of it. My clients actually HAVE enough money to pay for my expensive
services. TV has no influence on their decision making seeing as none of them watch TV, and
most see such activity as a waste of time. I'm glad I quite Google and others to do what I do now.
I never would have achieved happiness or gotten my proper due going about things that way. I
don't use crowdfunding. I kind of HATE crowdfunding. Crowds are idiots. Unless they're rich
crowds of course.
Monday, January 19, 2015, 3:36 p.m.,
Martin Luther King Day
So as it turns out, I recently announced on Twitter I'll be selling some of my most valuable
possessions of all! My stuff! At a discounted rate! What is worth six figures will be available for
four figures. It's like the world's biggest discount. Still cheaper than a lot of other stuff.
I'm auctioning off my first would-be patented invention.
Selling my invention at auction online is a little like Auctioning off the prototype of the Apple 1,
except instead of selling the Apple 1, I'm selling the Typewriter Plugged Into a TV Set that's
used to build its prototype. Still 100% mine! And to whoever purchases it at my auction, it will
be all theirs.
With each prototype I sell, money from profits will go towards manufacturing a greater number
of prototypes, which I will sell one at a time, slowly, over the course of time, say the next 10
years or so. Demand and number of bids for my invention will determine how many I will
produce, be it 1 to 10,000. Or perhaps I could use the money I earn to patent my prototype and
mass manufacture it into a more concrete model, like an Apple or an HP. I'll plan it out more as
time goes on.

P a g e | 1219

Tuesday, January 20th, 2015, 12:57,

List of things to do...

Work out at gym

Upload data to cloud
Update webcomic with new content
Work out at home
Read books
Channel gym energy into creative work

Secondary

Play Guitar
Draw
Draw comics

Chapters for a novel, a literary word-based novel, should be about 5 pages or so each. Not 20
pages long like the kind of chapters I'm used to writing. 5 pages-per-chapter is the average going
rate of both Dresden Files and The Game of Thrones saga I've been reading. Much less
ambitious than my rate, even if they use more scenes, longer narratives, and more characters.
They're still doing less words per page and less pages per chapter (5).
Okay, so there are my three best friends forever who live in Japan:

Shin Ishikawa (Gonzo, Last Exile, Trinity Blood)

ABe Yoshitoshi (Serial Experiments Lain)
Thomas Romain (Space Dandy, Oban, Nobunaga The Fool, Basquash, Cannon Busters)

When you're working your way up in anime, you get shocked by how famous some of the people
you have the prestigious privilege to meet are. So polite and well mannered. Which is a nice
surprise considering how rude some American anime fans can get online.
Speaking of heroes, one of my latest ones is LeSean Thomas. He's a rising star. Actually he's
already a star, but I suspect his fame will continue to grow as time goes on. He didn't give up in
his darkest hour, and now he's invincible. Pretty much. I want to do with French Publishers and
French Bande Dessinee what he did with animation outsourcing and animating for JM anime in
South Korea.
Wednesday, January 21st, 2015, 2:08 p.m.,
I really, Really like black-and-white style-design "indie action comics", or "indie action hero
comics", or "indie martial arts comics" (aka Japanese manga).

P a g e | 1220

Honestly, I'm not expecting any real progress until at least the ages of 40 - 45. By 50, half the
people I admire or was raised by will be dead, and there isn't much I can do about that except
MAYBE pay for the funerals if I've got any money. Buh-Bye, Dad/Florida. You won't achieve
anything in life until you're at least 40, or even 50. That doesn't surprise me at all. You got to be
old to truly achieve. No little kids allowed. Only fully grown, mature, wise, experienced adults.
No cheating your way to that.
Now that my number 1 critic at the moment has been silenced, I can live in free, without a lot of
stress, and with no bullies around to verbally harass me, I can really focus on my health, fitness,
weight loss, and studies.
Me and my dad are finally getting along financially and mentally. We're working in unison for
the first time in years. He's still kind of ornery and curmudgeon, but at least he's cooperative
mostly in funding my career dreams with capital. He pays allows me a budget of $100 a month.
Since Ustream fired me, I'm now allowed to put that monthly $100 into other personal projects,
like recent stuff, like sprucing my technology so I can make money at it.
I gave out little 2 person father/son business team a name: C & J Enterprises. He helps me pay
for computers, software, and web subscription fees that I normally wouldn't have enough money
for. Cary paid for my gym membership, too, but that was only after I had begged to get one.
Dad helped me pay my Ustream bills, even when Ustream and Funimation ripped me and my
dad off, try to do a copyright "bust", and attempted manipulate Ustream into firing me, which
they did, Dad still supported me, and saw the value of what I was doing. Dad was hoping I would
eventually profit from my Ustream channel as much as was hoping that. We both were hoping I
would succeed. Funimation and Ustream weren't though, despite the $1.2K's worth of payments
Ustream had already received from me and him. In other words, Ustream committed high way
robbery. They led us on, let us pay them $1,200.00 in hosting fees, only to ban me from the cite
because I dissed Toonami on Twitter and Lance Heiskell didn't know it was me his x-onlinefriend/former-ally running the channel he was going after. Lance didn't just make me lose
money. He took $1,200 right out of my dad's pocket. So $1,200 in damages thanks to
Funimation.
My modern media hacking skills have served me well. I'm a friggin computer genius. My media
hacking is some of the best there is. I've managed to expunge a competing hacker from my
network and nullify the severity of his threats. No good can come of him gaining access to this
system. He's obviously digging for dirt. Not gonna happen. I counter hacked him quite badly,
and now the police know his SSID, and can track him down soon enough. Eat THAT.

P a g e | 1221

Thursday, January 22nd, 2015,

Neighbors aren't cunning, per say. They're not smart enough to be that. They're aggressive,
violent, inconsistent, bully-ish, condescending, sociopaths with something to prove. But they
aren't cunning saboteurs and masterminds the way Brian Johnston was. It takes a very cunning
analytical and diabolical mind to achieve the level of evil sabotage and spywork Brian achieved.
The FBI wouldn't pursue my neighors the way it pursued Brian. They lucked out by a LOT more
bigoted and racist and stupid than him, and more verbal in person. Either way there aren't any
direct threats in my life the way there were. My progress is no longer tampered with. I can
essentially do whatever I want. And now I know what and what not to put on a computer.
***
Friday, January 23rd, 2015, 7:08,
I counterhacked my neighbor(s) today. I set up an algorithm to deliver limitless beatdowns and
kill the computer of anyone who breaks into my network. A thousand times over. The guy's a
parasitic bully. He's like the ultimate predator. Ultimate obsessive behavior. He made a break in
attempt on my network every 5-20 SECONDS (!), for 4 1/2 half hours. Definitely not a stable
individual. Apparently his full time job is breaking into my system and spying on my desktop.
But now I'm hacking him back, and now I get to manipulate HIS Computer. Great stuff.
***
Traditional TV died and rotted, and collapsed in on itself with the whole Viacom-SVU: PredatorKiller Internet Spy Racket Disrespect-The-King thing. Right around the time streaming video
online and on HDMI arrived to replace it now and forever. I see TV for the non-quality garbage
it is now. If you have hopes of doing a nice good old fashioned deep and smart, profound and
detailed SF or fantasy TV show, forget about it! That's not what TV does anymore. That's what
anime companies and DVD And the internet does. Not broadcasters, with rare exceptions like
El-Ray Network, which really is doing its best in taking after ActionToon unlike all the others.
Trying to do a good show in a bad TV Era is like trying to make it in Hollywood as a computer
programmer. You're in the wrong industry, bucko! It's unfortunate, but now that I can see it for
the petty industry of freaks, nerds, wimps, and weirdos that it is, I can focus my attention where
it should be, and needs to be: On Internet, Silicon Valley, film, indie animation, anime, books,
and comics! The Easy stuff. And I can focus on getting in shape and working out in an
appropriate place right around my house. I've lost all my desire to have my own TV show,
especially considering it was an obvious Achilles Heel for me on the part of competitors. Well,
that and spy networks online. TV has become quite the Monstrosity of Fear, Hatred, Mean
People, Envy, Malice, Slander, and Paranoia recently, especially comedy and the news. FuckTV.

P a g e | 1222
Bottom Line About Art:

Never Draw for an Employer (It Murders Your Precious Sacred Royal Soul)
Never Draw to become Wealthy (that will never happen in a million years, your
better off with Casinos)
Never Draw to Attain Respect, Admiration, Fame, Power, or Status (the opposite
will happen)
FUCK Competing with other artists. Never, EVER draw competitively, or to
compete. You will lose, easily. Just always remember there will always be
people who are a lot better and there will always be those who are a lot worse.
Whic one it is doesn't matter. You don't at all need to know where you fit
h
into
"The bigger picture" and "The bigger equation". You have no control over
that
sort of thing so why wrack your braining thinking you can somehow
magically control the court of public opinion to sway otherwise? I mean,
really.
Do Draw Religiously and Compulsively, and After Working Out at the Gym
Do Draw Obsessively and Compulsively (Art productivity will never flourish
unless you train it enough and Master it Enough for it to function like the
water in a faucet, to be shut on and off with a ton of ease so it's painless,
and at will, controlled by your will)

Saturday, January 24th, 2015,

Andrew Alberts and his wife, Jinnel Warrington. Setting the bar lower on a daily basis and
failing at Everything in Life since 2003.

* * *
I had some early coping issues with the onset of my high power levels early in life. The power of
my intellect, talent, strength, energy, creativity, influence, fame, and innovation. Around the ages
of 21-30 and upwards, sometime when I became a recluse, I realized I was coming to terms with
enormous amounts of physical, emotional, spiritual, and intellectual-creative analytical power. I
realized I had abilities other people would kill for, and the rest would be incredibly envious of. I
was not prepared. Not prepared for the emergence of my power level at all. To some, my power
was a threat. To others a liberation and the savior of humanity. It was an enormous burden. My
enormous influence and power with technology isolated me. My genius isolated me from
society, and from almost everyone I interacted with. It left me uncertain of how to continue
moving forward. Exercise helped harness my energy, I didn't realize that until this year, 2015.
Now I'm starting to have some physical strength to balance out my mental strength. Before that
my being wasn't in balance and harmony. It took an entire decade to cope with my newly
acquired powers, to cope with them and get a better sense of control over them. I was haunted by
questions of "Why me?" Questions like "If I'm so powerful, how come everyone else living with
me (and across from me) and the events happening to me are so out of my control??"...So much
bullying and harassment. So much disrespect from commoners without power. Fortunately, I've
figured out how to use physical strength as a way to control and harness mental power and
spiritual-creative power. I feel like either I've either just gotten my power under control. That, or
people don't notice it as much or make as big of a deal out of it anymore.

P a g e | 1223

Yay! Only 2 chapters left to write after this one until I get to self-publish the latest installment in
the literary narrative saga of My Life: The Greatest Tall Tale Ever Told! (i.e. The Journal
Manifesto). Words: Manifested.
I'd honestly still like to work for CN and/or WS, and join their min-fraternity/community. I know
they seem to think I resented them at one point because their message board and some of their
shows felt like they were ignoring my privacy. However, I forgave them for it. It was a
miscommunication, and I know better than to misinterpret rogue fan opinion for the opinions of
animation producers. I honestly don't feel like they did it to hurt me. Not their company anyway.
That was isolated fan incidents online, and everyone knows some Adult Swim fans online can
be meaner than Holy Fuck. But that's okay. I'm over it. I've learned to look past the community
issues, toward the bigger picture. The REAL community. But lately I'm really in love with the
idea of hanging out around an office with equally cool people, goofing off, and turning it into
cartoons, drawings, and scripts. Because essentially, that is how the big CN works. I'm aware
they would have the rights to almost everything I created up till that point, and I have no idea
how they'd take that. I like having certain friends like Chris and Jonny who agree with
everything I say, but I'm learning to be okay with friends who disagree on certain issues. I place
more value on workplace community and kinship than I used to. I'm not a show createur...yet. So
I'm not sure if they'd actually WANT me to go with them to cons during con season. I'd rather
just be egoless, humble, and work in the background quietly. Working at CN/WS and working at
a Silicon Valley Laboratory and Google have certain things in common, believe it or not. There's
a lot of freedom involved. No one's going to be breathing down your neck, unless you do nothing
at all, and even then you might get away with it.
To-Do List:

Finish A Novel Manuscript

Finish A Graphic Novel Manuscript
Run a Webcomic on ComicFury (continue)
Work at CN/AS
Work at an Anime Studio
Publish in Paris, France
Attend Japan Expo to Promote Myself/Work
Travel Abroad in Eurasia, Author Travel Log Booklets
Make New Friends, Join a Community of Some Kind
Continue Staying in Shape
Patent and Invent New Stuff

P a g e | 1224

Sorry. Dad. No repair idiot is fucking TOUCHING my system until every last one of those files
are backed up for mobility and safety, and I have the upper hand. AGAIN. I knew Cary's
intuition was wrong, and anticipated any advice he gives me will end in disaster, and everything
he disapproves of is the right decision. Cary is an IDIOT, a RETARDED PERSON when it
comes to reading people, and anticipating events and occurrences. Fortunately for all of us...I'm
not so gullible or unintuitive. I have to fight Cary for every dollar he has, everything he "gives",
every step of the way he wants to take it back the very next minute. It's been like this for as long
as I can remember. A fight and struggle to the bitter end. Even the IRS tried to come after me for
spending my own $4,000 I attained LEGALLY. Someone is always willing to fight you on the
trek to the top of the mountain every step of the way. So be it.
IS the system rigged in my favor?? I can't help but wonder about that.
***
Monday, January 26th, 2015,
Thing to work on: Re-Read all my printed writing, not just journal files on a screen.
***
Tuesday, January 27th, 2015,
Fascinating. Most of my stretch marks and calluses are vanishing. They're starting to flat out
disappear and they're evaporating! That's miraculous. I can feel my weight decreasing, slowly
but surely.
Things Promoted by Communism:

Tyranny
Shared Living
Censorship
Copyright and Trademark
Anti-Freedom-of-Speech
Fascism
Atheism and Secularism
Many countries that aren't America
Murder
Genocide
Business, Corporations
Ownership
Copyright Bullying
Anti-Americanism, Anti-Democracy

P a g e | 1225

The Most Feared Words in the English Language

Nigger
Faggot
Jap
Pedophile
Rape
Molestation
Molester
Whore
Slut
Cum
Kike
***

Just finished sending my first news tip to CNN. I decided if Google doesn't want to credit me for
the invention of streaming video uploads to YouTube, I'll do the next best thing to suing for
money. I'll alert the mainstream news media. If Brian Johnston can turn HIMSELF into an
"infamous crime story", I'll one up him by turning myself into a "Successful Tech Story". I'll get
famous like he did, through the news, only I'll do it without murdering my best friend. That's
gonna piss him off so much, me getting the drop on him like that. Brian is news"worthy" for
being a coldblooded murderer and grade a arrogant nerd jerk. I'm newsworthy for being an
inventor. Works out pretty well for me in the end.
***
The only other guy besides me, who was an inventor, a cartoonist, and an author, is Rube
Goldberg. But Goldberg never achieved my level of cultural ubiquity. No one living today has
done as much as I have as an inventor-author-cartoonist. Just the fact that I exist in all three
fields is a testament to the fact that I've put myself in a one-man-league of my own.

As an inventor, I did YouTube, Video Algorithm Playlists, and Streaming Video

As a cartoonist, I did Art - Manifested, and End Times - Parallax
As an author-screenwriter, I wrote a pilot script, and My Journal Series

All important achievements with what I believe to be historic value.

***
Steve Blum (@Blumspew) retweeted my Uncle Grandpa Pizza Steve fanart upload on Twitter.
Awesome! I'm glad he's such a good friend of mine. But when you think about it. Steve Blum is

P a g e | 1226

everyone's friend almost. Well, anyone who's a big fan anyway, which is why so many people
like him.
***
Aside from all that...there is even more stuff I've been doing...including:

eBay
CNN
The Guinness Archive of World Records

I've made submissions to all of them.

***
Wednesday, January 28th, 2015, 5:46,
I just got back from the gym. I left around 5:12 or so. I did nonstop strength training isometric
exercises, mostly in the back strength training, weight lifting gym room for around 20 minutes. I
did a lot of 100+ lbs. lifts. At least 4 to 6 different machines set to 100 lbs. of resistance.
But mostly, I did it to get away from having to listen to mom talking to Jinnel on the phone.
That's the most annoying sound in the world to me.
Those isometric strength training machines give me comfort. It's my favorite kind of muscle
building exercise.
I've worked out at the gym 4 separate times so far
I'm doing very innovative things with writing.
I'm forging a style that integrates world literature with speculative fiction and narration.
I write speculative world literary fiction. With lots of action, procedural crime
detective, adventure, horror, and military-political science. As well as artillery
science. In small doses.

***
Thursday, January 29th, 2015, 9:25 a.m.,
So I filled out a job with the Seminole County Board of Commissioners. A government job as a
librarian. That would be so sweet, working with books all day!
I must admit, that would be pretty cool working for Obama as a librarian. Technically, if you
have a government job, you work for Obama.

P a g e | 1227

I find the highest honor in hard work, honesty, and a hard day's work for a profitable day's pay.
For the most part if I have an opponent or challenge standing before me, the opponent may and
will take all kinds of manipulation, deception and cheap shots. But I never do. I believe in the
Horatio Alger lifestyle. If you want something, you NEVER TAKE SHORTCUTS. You have to
fight and work fair and square to get it. It sickens me so many people refuse to play fairly, to
play by the rules, and choose to pull strings and rig the game to favor themselves, or take credit
for whatever temporary thing it is I'm doing at the moment. Or upstage me at "just the right
opportunity and moment" in a sad, often failed attempt to "steal my thunder". I'm just glad I'm
not the only one of my colleagues who sees right through this tactic of deception. I'm applying
for a new job with the government of Seminole County Board, as I'm aware the internet isn't
going to solve every financial problem. A couple people make a billion dollars on Google,
Microsoft or whatever? So what. It's a fluke. They got lucky. I don't believe my luck and good
fortune ever will be at that level, so the next best thing I can do is take care of my body and
mind, and what I produce for the page and screen. If it's not an honest day's pay, you should
probably give it back. Money, respect or the mainstreamization of my work are not in the stars
for me. And they might never, and not ever be, either. But strength training is something I have
control over. DAILY DRAWING AND WRITING is something I have control over. Those
things I can exploit, and use to improve myself and make myself, my being, and my life stronger,
and better. I do love training and working during the day. I'm quite unconcerned about the state
of daytime television. Why was I ever watching that garbage in the first place. I'd rather read a
book, seeing as I'm eating enough brain food now to be hyperfocused even WITH Adult ADD.
3-minute-sketches are a lot of fun, too.
Daily Routine

Journals
3-Minute Sketches
Short Science Fantasy Stories
Reading Novels
Gym (Muscles, Focus)
Eating Brain Food (Focus)
Japan Language Studies
French Language Studies
Sketch Books
Comics

(Print Runs) The order is, Commentary, Then Manifesto III (Commentary 2), then
Manifesto IV (i.e. Commentary 3) (i.e. Docs A Commentary - Commentary) 1,500 pgs.

(Print Runs)Then Journals: Volume I, II, III, IV, (1,600 pgs) and (Computer Docs) The
Hypergraphia. Then New Journals

P a g e | 1228

Whoa. So, I'm a Master of Literature now. I've Mastered my Field.

I'm a Contemporary Modern Day Master of the Word Arts.
I've published more journals, art, and comics than anything else. I've published very few
philosophy and new age books. Only 1. A short anthology of essays from when I was 16 and 17.
My philosophy has probably evolved since then, so I'll need to revise it and update my
philosophy book, and future philosophical publications.

P a g e | 1229

Thursday, January 29th, 2015, 11:47 p.m.,

Oh joy! Time to jumpstart this bitch yet again!
May or may not have anything to say for the remainder of tonight. But I actually worked pretty
hard today. Literally. I burned a LOT of calories and fat in my workout routine. I find isometric
leg lifts that target my quadriceps help. As do Leg Curls, and V-Crunches. Well that, and a lot of
60 - 120 lbs. strength training arm and leg weight machines. I'm starting to get more used to this
way of living. I actually enjoy it quite a bit. I wouldn't have lasted this long if I didn't enjoy most
of this. I enjoy feeling that strain in my muscles, and sweating through my face and back. That
means it's working, and I'm losing weight. Quite a bit of it. I never talked about the physical
aspect of my existence much until lately, mostly because I spend most of my time trapped in a
house with no reason to get in shape, as no one sees me if I don't have windows open. There was
no incentive to make exercise into a habit.
I watched very little, almost no television today. Maybe 1 or 2 hours, tops. I was reading,
drawing, and working out instead. I'm dedicated to my health and weight loss.
But hell, man! I'm just getting started. Today was a nice warm up for what's on the way later on.
Tomorrow, it is back to reading, writing, drawing, and all those options's various combinations.
Some people try to "Talk me out of writing this much". Yeah, right. They're all envious,
obviously. Like that'd ever happen! Ha ha! The habit is too hard wired into my mind now. It's
automatic. My words in my word processor are like bullets in a machine gun, ready to mow
pretty much anyone down as circumstances warrant. I'm very at home here. I'm comfortable
here. On a word processor. Any word processor, really. In a perfect world, my artist's psyche
wouldn't be blocked, and would be just as bulletproof as my journal sessions, but by now it's
obvious to me bulletproof art work-schedules and bulletproof writing schedules are entirely
different things.
***
Saturday, January 31st, 2015, 2:38 p.m.,
Currently home alone and leaving the CGI Cult-TV Animated Film, Planet 51, with Dwayne
"The Rock" Johnson, on Nickelodeon in the background as I write. I dismissed that film at first
like a lot of people, but I've watched it at least 4-5 times on TV. Might eventually buy the DVD.
It's not at the TOP of my to buy list, but I would like to eventually own a copy on DVD, much
like everything else. One of Nickelodeon's best kinds of NickToons is the Dreamworks CGI film
franchise shows (Kung-Fu Panda, Monsters Vs. Aliens).
It's been a while since I've checked my LinkedIn profile for notifications and emails. At least a
few days. It's nice being home alone for more than 5-8 hours at a time. It's nice that my parents

P a g e | 1230

realize I am that responsible of a person now. It's not even scary or anything living here by
myself. I love solitude. The house is a lot quieter and more harmonious when I am the only one
here. That's just how I roll.
I'm beginning to think Crazy Train News at 11 Stalks Peggy, Cary, Jinnel, Cousin Beth, and
Andrew. I never had any problems when I was living alone, UNTIL they showed up out of pretty
much nowhere in front of me one unfateful day, and began interfering/meddling in my social life
and I "Came Back Haunted" to this haunted neighborhood with graveyards n' stuff.
Oh no's!
To be continued...
Joe's Quarterly Manga and Anime Review:
There are a few bright lights shining through in the rubble of a collapsed American Manga-ka
market, with the fall of Tokyopop, Borders, and DeviantART. Three of the former-biggest
players in anime and manga.
Some new names are emerging though, and I'm happy to see that finally happen. Webcomics and
webmanga are getting pretty good, with production values catching up to Japanese print manga
and screen anime. Sparkler Monthly, Yen Press, [new] Toonami (easily making Saturday the
Best Day of the Week), FUNimation (dubs and subs), Otaku USA, Viz, and whatever's in my
local used bookstore downtown in the very back corner shelves, I will normally take the time to
read or purchase if I have some spare change. I also read the comics of the site I myself publish
at: Comicfury.com. I've also grown to like male artists such as Tyler Page and Fred Gallagher in
particular, as I can relate to their drawing routines and styles.
Sunday, February 1st, 2015, 3:28 p.m.,
I'm gonna sign up with codeschool.com!
Whoops, it costs money. Maybe Later.

I Am A God
Joseph-Joe-JM-James-Jay
Is A God
I Am An Egyptian God

P a g e | 1231

As an inventor, the Heavens gave me Ingenuity, Originality, and Divine Powers. I'm a Divine
Healer and Shaman, and Mystic, and Tech God.
Invention and Revolution is for Gods,
Money and Fame is for Sinners.
These hands. They have the Power, to both Create and Destroy.
There are a lot of "victims" out there. But in my opinion, I don't believe in victims. And have no
pity for any form of victim. Being a so-called victim requires an admission of self-pity. An
admission that you're not in the driver's seat. I have no self-pity. Or emotional or chemical
addiction. I am pretty much in control of my life, even though the people around me are either
out of control or clinically depressed. That's not to say I don't have issues I've worked out, but I
don't believe in victimhood. I don't like people who are full of self pity. And I certainly don't pity
them. Stop feeling sorry for yourself, weakling. And I don't have time for people who are full of
self-pity. It actually kind of disgusts me. Oh boo hoo, whoa is me. I'm not strong. Life didn't
work out the way I hoped it would, better start making other people feel sorry for me now! Boo
hoo hoo. I'll never laugh at a joke again.
***
Methods of Investigation I am hesitant to "promote" in my crime detective stories:

Hacking
Big Brother Video Spying
Witch Hunting
Scapegoating
***

Monday, February 2nd, 2015, 2:26 p.m.,

It's hard to explain why I make the choices I do. Like my computers, for starters. I watch a lot of
videos online, but I've done the bulk of my writing online. It's hard to explain my feelings, but I
feel safer here than I do online or when I am sketching or drawing. I don't feel safe at my
sketchbook or on the internet. So I end up staying here, in my house on my computer writing in
this journal book, where I feel safe. Where I AM safe.
***

P a g e | 1232

Tuesday, February 3rd, 2015, 1:56 p.m.

Twitter - Land of Confusion and Distraction from Real Work.
Twitter - A Threat to Work Productivity Everywhere.
Weirdos.
I say it's high time I got back to writing scripts.
I want to write stories, about swords, and guns, and blood, and dead bodies, and drama, and
Mono's Duster, and martial arts dictionaries-glossaries, and violence.
I've already written like a million outlines, script pages, and short stories.
I'd better not forget how productive I've been with fiction and screen writing, too if I need
motivation.
I'm turning into quite the amazing Action and SF-Fantasy Literary-Graphic Auteur. Those short
stories are piling up. I had no idea I was so prolific at writing incremental narratives in short
bursts. Turns out some of those outlines are not so brief and short. The outline for Druidon was
MASSIVE, in terms of page density, albeit 1 page long or so, but each plot point was dense! A
lot of work went into that script, even if it was easy for me to write.
Wednesday, February 4th, 2015, 5:31,
Man! My mentor Phil never had to deal with that fan-neighbor-social-interaction-distraction
HORSE SHIT. Why the FUCK should I have to deal with it. It's a load of shit dealing with those
LOSERS. Fuck that noise.
Saturday, February 7th, 2015, 7:20,
In my humble opinion, geographical location, the view from where you are equals wealth. The
poorest person in Japan has more culture credibility than the RICHEST person in America,
purely because he lives in a superior culture, and own superior land.
I call it, Geographic Status and Privilege. And I'm about to increase mine. I'm about to get
promoted from the southeast to the North. From a red state to a blue state. From a classless,
violent state, to harmonious courteous one. Florida borders South America, the Armpit of the
Americas. The Northern State borders the Great White North: Canada, Toronto, and Ontario.
That's right. I'm relocating from Orlando, Florida, to Westland, Michigan.
Westland, Michigan is a 40 minute - 40 Mile Drive away from Windsor, Ontario, over in
Canada, which is essentially one of the many places the Canadian Border is. I'll be right next

P a g e | 1233

door to Toronto and Windsor! That's gonna be fun. Fortunately my parents have actually said
"Yes, You Can" to this one.
***
Sunday, February 8th, 2015, 2:34 p.m.
Book I really want:
Invaders from the North: How Canada Conquered the Comic Book Universe by John Bell.
Canadian Comics Artists:

Jhonen (?)
Todd McFarlane
Dave Sim
Gerhard
Faith Erin Hicks
Bryan Lee O Malley

Michiganian Cartoonists:

Windsor McCay
Craig Thompson
Fred Gallagher (Piro)

When you are born, you are bestowed with not only your biological astrology sign and ruling
planet, but the signs and ruling planets of your birth city and birth state, along with sprinklings of
the countries and state signs you've been to:
Therefore I am not "Just a Scorpio, with a Sagittarius Cusp" under the ruling planets of Pluto
(Scorpio) and Jupiter (Sagittarius). I'm also part Aries (the Sign of Action) under the ruling
planet of Mars, as well as part Aquarius under the ruling planets of Uranus and Saturn
(Aquarius). Most people, if not no one, is born entirely and exclusively under just one
astrological sign and ruling planet. We are all born under multiple signs and multiple ruling
planets.
Television content is becoming too sexualized, to pornographic, too chauvinistic, too sexual, too
graphic in all the wrong ways, too intentionally made to be awkwardly inappropriate in a sexual
way. Television's been perverted. You'd expect that kind of thing from online pornography. You
don't expect it from TV, yet there it is, polluting a medium that was once much more innocent
than it ever was now. Live and scandals get exploited. People get exploited. Countless suicides.
How far will it go? How low will these public displays of depravity sink? I find it disgusting.

P a g e | 1234

The internet has no official regulation yet, even if maybe it should. But TV HAS regulation. It is
quite disgusting what American television is attempting to exploit and sexualize.
***
Monday, February 9th, 2015, 11:48 p.m.
"Hey Joe,
It's good to see you are a busy man"
-My old Teacher and Mentor
Phil
The very teacher, mentor, and big shot I idolize called me a "busy man"! Thank god. So glad
someone finally called me busy. Because I am busy. I know that much. But not everyone living
with me believes it. Actually, no one living with me believes it. But if Phil says it, I know I can
count on it for honesty and trustworthy opinion. His opinion of me matters more to me than
most, because I've known and trusted him for so long, and because of the nature of our
relationship.
He's practically at Chris's level of bromance now. Chris and I always end our smartphone chats
with a brotherly "I love you man" whenever we hang up. Neither of us is ashamed of having
such a loving brotherly relationship. We're as close as brothers. We ARE brothers. Me and Chris.
Okay,
Okay, Focus.
I gotta Focus.

P a g e | 1235

Things I have to get to dealing with:

New Allowance Budget: $350-$400 / Month

$750 Short Film
$100-$150 Kindle Advertising Fees (new service)
Strength Training At the Gym
Psychic Reading
Relocation Budget: $500/Month w/ Utilities and Food
Car and Chauffeur
Road Trips with Caregiver ($50-$100)
Establishing Independence
Meeting Comics Deadlines (Webcomic Cartoonist)
Writing Short SF-Fantasy Fiction
Watching Anime on YouTube, Netflix, CrunchyRoll, and Roku
Learning how to use Wirecast for ActionToonTV website, ActionToonTV.com
eBay Auctions of Book and Tech
Writing more killer scripts for my archives
Exec Producer Supervising of Short Film
Check Twitter, Write Tweets
Check Adsense
Check Blogger and YouTube, post
Check Email regularly
Back up video and word processor files on 2 Terabyte Portable Hard Drive
Wear Arbitron Meter
The Eventual Move back to Ann Arbor, Solo. Well, living solo anyway.
Follow up on Government Librarian Job in Casselberry

Uggh. Lotta...work, to sort out and get done. Yuck.

***
Tuesday, February 10th, 2015, 1:21 p.m.,
Combining my favorite elements of Sagittarius and Aries on a project.
Creating spectacular action.
Do it big. Do it first. Do it fast.

P a g e | 1236

Thursday, February 12th, 2015, 1:36 a.m.

My friends are beyond impressed by me. And I enjoy their support. Jonny still hasn't seen my art
book!
I went to my director and co-producer, Amitesh of Ami3D studios, and I said "I'd like my short
animated 3D film to feel like one of your video gaming cinematics. The next best thing to 2-D
anime is 3-D gaming and digital layering like Industrial Light and Magic or Final Fantasy. I find
video game cinematics visually satisfying as an animation piece in and of itself, so I'll do my
best to go with that. I'm not producing a video game, but I like how video games look. I want
my film to look and feel like a cinematic sequence in a game. It would be great for my first
resume as a filmmaker.
Friday, February 13, 2015,
Scratch all that above. Fuck. Back to ground zero. AGAIN!!! The studio I was in negotiations
with openly admitted they couldn't handle the work load, and that my production values were too
great for them to handle. No studio that cheap could handle a workload as great as mine.
Friday the 13th:
Ouch! That hurts Doug from next door where Judy the actual NICE NEIGHBOR WHO (who
lived there before you) used to live. Your words hurt, asshole!!!
Okay, I said my piece. Glad I got that off my chest.
New topics to write about:

[Adult Bully]s and cyberbullies

Psychiatric Malpractice
Socializing on Social Media
Working With Superstars in Their Designated Fields
Fame
Infamy
Solitude
Neighbors
Being Framed
Relocation
Money Management
The Working World
Responsibility
Arrogance-Egotism and Modesty-Humility

P a g e | 1237

Weed and homosexuality should be sins. Outlawed and made even MORE illegal.
All of my biggest rivals and mortal enemies are either gay or potheads.
So fuck the faggots and druggies. Fucking queers. Fucking potty mouth, Torret's Syndrome,
loudmouth hippy druggies. They've all offered me nothing but grief. Not too big on 2000 era
Jews with Jewfros either, but I'll let that one slide. If it doesn't give me a reason to murder it with
my power, that is. Sumner Rothstein is a Jew obviously, and he's a sociopath, perfect example of
what I am talking about. I'm not talking about the Jews of 1945. They didn't do anything wrong.
But the Jews of 2002 are a bunch of faggots who wear too many Jewfro wigs. Faggots.
Ranting onward...
MAAAAAAAAAN. I only give a shit about speculative fiction and Franco-Belgian BD now,
which is why I'm moving up northern, to be in closer proximity to "local" international culture,
like French Canadians and Torontonians, and Michiganians. I'm better than everything else. I
have a very sever God complex. I am God. I'm arrogant, but it's justified. No one writes or draws
like I do in Japan or North America, no one writes books like I do. No one in America draws
comics like I do. I need to spend every waking moment channeling that creative energy into
comics. Because what I offer is unique and superior in depth and quality to everything else on
the market. Asia lacks depth. And Religion! And a Union! And Democracy! And gritty noir
independent art like what Frank Miller, Jhonen, Todd McFarlane, Bill Watterson, Kevin
Eastman, Dave Sim, Min-Woo Hyung, and Jeff Smith do. That urban noir Post-Apocalyptic and
Post-Miller design style can never entirely be replicated in Japan, unless they're knocking off my
style, and even then it's nothing more than a cheap knock off with too much gray and not enough
pitch black, or worse yet, a pretentious self-righteous pro-Japanese parody, which is lame as all
fuck.
No one on the planet does what I do, like I do it or as well as I do it. Time to hit the gym again
and tap into that gym energy next week.
[Subtitle: I much prefer French and American-Canadian-French culture to Japanese culture.]
3 Days until I can afford marketing on Amazon. Man, being a pro is tough. I'm glad Phil knows I'm a
pro. As long as he knows I'm a busy pro, I don't care what anyone online thinks of me. Because if Phil
says you're a busy pro, you're a busy pro. He worked for Mike Judge on Beavis and Butt-Head back in the
day. He's earned his keep. He came up the more traditional way, by working in the animation industry,
back when that was actually possible and the industry had no real respect.
"Animation has no real real writers. Most of the more "pre-eminent" writers want to switch over to
writing network dramas as boring as all hell" Source unknown. Could have been John K of Ren and
Stimpy Fame, for however long THAT lasted. John K kind of gets his information on cartoons wrong
because he's yet another typical "Arrogant classical animation" guy like Phil kind of was at one point. I
was never a fan of that. I suppose it doesn't matter NOW that I'm actually gaining acceptance with the

P a g e | 1238
anime studio heads in more than one place. Something no one has accomplished aside from me yet. No
otakus in America got to speak directly to Hiroaki, Hipira Tezuka, Satellite, Gozon DHX, the two
Thomases, Pizza Steve, or Prime Minister Gozon as I have. Their friendship, is considered to be one of
my new-paradigm status symbols.
Glossary. List of nyms.

Seth
McFarland
Hipira Tezuka
ABE
Satellite
Gemini Cell
Joe King
Picasso
Walt Disney
Hitler
Santa
Shou Tucker
Johann Liebert
Light Yagami
Sai Panda
Yoko Ono
Leonardo Da Vinci
Robert Crumb
The Allied Forces
King Gozon
Gozon
Thugnificent
Colonel Sanders Nosferatu
The Ghosts
Hauntings
Sunnyside
Lotso
Pizza Steve
Azula Inc.
Princess Bubblegum
JG
Sweatshop Graphix

P a g e | 1239

Sweatshop Graphix is mocking French Culture? Well fuck Sweatshop Graphix. Who needs em.
Things:

Abraham Lincoln
John F. Kennedy
Zombies
Zombie Apocalypse
Time Travel
Robots
Pixies
Clones
Clowns
Clown Rape
Hitler Rape
Witches
Witchhunts
Nazis
World War II
Red Scare Black List
Ghosts
Giants
Sharks
Grandfather-Rap

Tuesday, February 17, 2015, 1:17

New story idea: "God Bless Amerika: The Nightmare of Amerika". A story that villainizes
Amerika and Amerikan Kulture.
racism, big business, marketing, terrorism, war, sex, red scare, witch hunters, the southeast, TV,
hacking, spying, Viacom, NBC, politics, bad neighbors, not having privacy, not letting people
"step out of line", Brian Johnston, bullying, cyberbullying, rednecks, cracker white trash, ice
cream truck, Florida, Christianity, Red States, The Southeast. Everything I HATE about America
will become manifest in this.

Not everyone is forgotten after they die. When you die, at the very least your family and friends
will remember you, whether for better or worse. Hopefully for the better. Not everyone is

P a g e | 1240

completely forgotten when they die. That kind of thinking strikes me as a tad bit intellectually
cynical. I can think of plenty of people who are scared of me dying, and would never forget me
in their minds if I did die.
***
I sent my most recent business [LinkedIn] email to my new friend Shinji Ishikawa. I sent him a
link to my Amazon.co.jp book [Art - Manifested] Japanese retail page as a gift and token of
goodwill and courtesy, with a brief explanation of the significance of the gift. I hope it's
thoughtful and polite enough. I was going to send the entire ebook through a PDF, but LinkedIn
doesn't have enough memory in its email system to allow it.
Also, Gold's Gym favorited one of my tweets today. The tweet where I wrote about hitting the
gym in the mornig, less than 30 minutes after I woke up this morning, still half asleep. I'm also
on their list of "Favorite Members" even though I work out at Planet Fitness downtown. That or
Retweeted. That's Arnold Schwarzenegger's favorite gym. The Greatest Bodybuilder and Action
Hero of all time. Another honorable mention for me! I'm so proud! I guess I am pretty strong.
Who knows. Maybe I can be the next Boris Vallejo. The guy who's ripped, and helps bring SFFantasy speculative fiction works to life. Like Conan!
Artistic influences of the moment: Boris Vallejo, HP Lovecraft, Thomas Romain, Hiroaki
Samura, Dreamworks SKG, Jean Giraud / Moebius, Enki Bilal, Jodorowski, ABE, Dave Sim,
Otomo, McFarlane, Tartakovsky.
***
Wednesday, February 18th, 2015, 11:43 a.m.,
How to write:
Never stop visualizing printed words and spoken sentences in your mind's eye. Never stop
thinking of words and printed words that compose sentences in the book in your head. And then
you need to get it all down on paper.
1:04 p.m.,
Day's going well and according to plan so far.
Worked out on treadmill for 8 minutes, and did isometric and muscle strengthening exercises
throughout the morning for an hour, then took a shower with some old spice, and when I got out
I put on new clothes, scraped off a lot of my calluses, put on socks and sandals to protect my
feet, and brushed my teeth for a bit, to prepare for a day of activity. I might write and I might
draw, and I might do both. The day is full of limitless possibilities, so you never know. I'm also
keeping tabs on my sales analytics online. I feel cleaner and healthier already. Before all that, I
ordered 3-4 books on Amazon. I also watched some of an episode of Bakugan: Gundalian

P a g e | 1241

Invaders by way of YouTube on my smartphone while waking up and doing random stuff about
the house, instead of reading or something, before I worked out.
I really HATE sharing a house with parents, siblings, in-law siblings, nephews, nieces, and
whatnot. Thank god I finally started saving up to rid myself of that by moving far away to my
own place. Thank. Gawd!

Current Weight: 344 lbs.

Previous weight 1 week ago: 350 lbs.
Weight Lost in 1 week: 6 lbs.

Maybe I can use my mother's stature as a health nut to use to my advantage. Like copy some of
how she eats (for instance, eating low carb and calorie cereals for snacks instead of stuff full of
sugar, chocolate, and calories. And not eating fast food every day or even more than one to three
times a week.
***
Thursday, February 19, 2015, 7:35 p.m.,
50 Shades of Gay SUCKS! What a horrible, HORRIBLE Sex franchise. Not in the LEAST bit
curious or interested in what that James woman writes. SUCKS.
Moving on, Aunt Patty and Uncle Denny are visiting for the week. They are incredibly nice
people, and never mean to me. Just the kinds of relatives you want to have. My best family and
friends are the kind you actually WANT to have in your houses.
Getting pretty good at working out and strength training certain muscles on my body: Abs,
Ankles, Forearms, Pecs, Quads, Gluteus. All of these areas of musculature have been taxed to
their fullest in the last 2 days. I've hit the gym 2 days a week, for 3 weeks so far. And now that I
know exactly which machines to use almost, and exactly what parts of my muscles and body to
keep working, and exactly which type of workout techniques to use, I can refine and intensity my
workout.
***

Friday, February 20th, 2015, 2:33 p.m.,

P a g e | 1242

Today may as well be National Piracy Day, what with the rate at which I am pirating shit. It's
awesome. My favorite downloads include Microsoft Word for my desktop, and ArtRage for
digital painting and coloring on my desktop. Now if I could just get that printer to work...Also
downloaded some mp3 versions of my favorite musical albums. Lots of Best Ofs.
I'm so happy The Pirate Bay is back online! I spent a good five or six hours on there and Bit
Torrent, funneling downloaded data between the two to my hard drive.
My favorite stuff to draw, pencil, and ink, is the same kind of stuff none of the fans care about or
notice. My least famous, least noticed drawings are my favorites. The really weird stuff like
organic architecture, dual wielding, Krin, and foreshortened anatomy and guns.
Good thing I'm strong as fuck. Otherwise all that bullshit and lies people spread to the media
about me might actually bother me. Not much of a crybaby though. Unless I'm watching the
ending to Cowboy Bebop of course.
Sunday, February 22nd, 2015, 7:37,
Making some great progress on my areas of expertise.

Speculative Fiction, Novels, Short Fiction: 35 pages completed

Comics, GN: 36 pages completed
Script, Screenplay: 75 pages completed

My aim is to see that amount of work doubled in the next four years. And embellished, and
outlined, and connected. And refined.
Story Fodder:

Egypt
Twitter
YouTube
Anime
Manga
[Adult Swim]
Cartoon Network
William the Conqueror
The Villains
Bande Dessinee
Casselberry
Parents
Poverty
Isolation

P a g e | 1243

The Audience Mob

Celebrity Culture
Florida
The South
The North
Los Angeles
Silicon Valley
LinkedIn

I hate being a rockstar. Everyone wants to walk up to you and....bother, you. Being famous
sucks. Everyone recognizing you everywhere you go. It sucks. I'd sooner leave the country than
go on television of any kind.
My career and life aren't ruined unless I SAY "they're ruined". And I never actually said that.
Making comics requires courage?? It does now!! If I said I was ruined in anyway, I'd be proving
all the critics "right". And they're never "right" about anything most of the time.
***
Monday, February 23rd, 2015, 10:19 p.m.,
I know the world is hoping I'll become an artist of comics and cartoons. And I'll have guilt if I
give up on my art dream, and only pursue writing instead. But this is how it has to be. I can do
webcomics. Crappy webcomics, but unless I get a lot better, webcomics is as far as my art will
be able to go.
The solution: Get used to the "cartoonist art guilt", and just keep running. Keep writing. Keep
producing books and scripts and texts and short stories despite that heavy guilt. If I want to
succeed as a writer I can't show indecisiveness.
I know something my parents don't know? Nyah nyah nya nyah nyah

P a g e | 1244

Monday, February 23rd, 2015, 12:38 p.m.,

What I'm working on:

Comics
Short Fiction
Scripts.

I'm not working with a publisher or agent to promote myself or my work, so...
Social-Media-Oriented Distribution and Sales:
Best Results (sales and views): Amazon, G+, ComicFury

Amazon (120)
Kindle (120)
G+ (500 - 600 / 1 page) (don't forget to link to stores and ComicFury)
ComicFury (160 - 300 views / 1 update)

Worst Results

Lulu (5) (low)

Scribd (80) (low)
CreateSpace(70)
Tumblr (20)
Blogspot (6)
YouTube (40)
Worst of All Results (i.e. low sales figures AND Backlash from trolls)

Stalker, Narcissist, Sociopath Porn Channel DeviantArt

Spy and Stalker Cartoon Network (TV)
Spy and Stalker Channel Adult Swim (TV / .com)
Facebook
Twitter (200) ("6") (deceptive)
Stalker Network Nickelodeon
Stalker CorporateViacom Channels
Salker Network NBC
Stalker Network MSNBC / Disney XD'
Stalker Channel "Investigation" Discovery

P a g e | 1245

I have an audience of 492 followers cumulative on LinkedIn, Twitter, and Google+. Only 1 of
them is a primary school chum. And that number used to be 0. So that's 492 random people I
mostly only kind of know. I still live very much in the real world, and very much not in the
media or internet (for the most part). I never really formed an attachment. Not much of one
anyway.
Tuesday, February 24th, 2015, 12:05 p.m.,
I have but one goal in life. Finish writing and drawing a large number of books and copies, sell a
lot of copies, move a lot of units online, and make a lot of money.
That's right, I'm measuring my success in life the traditional way: By dollar signs.
"I don't make fun of people who make a lot of money."
Oh really?? That's all I needed to hear. Time to make a lot of money. Or a little bit of money. But
preferably a lot.
I've decided. My life has purpose and meaning: To write and draw a series of volumes of
bestselling comics and books. My goal, purpose, meaning, and strategy in life is to sell books.
Primarily online, but if I can find an agent, in bookstores too. My goal and focus in life is to do
nothing but sell the books I author in bookstores (mostly online, and worldwide in five
continents as well). If I'm not a bestselling author and comics creator, I don't know what I am. If
I'm not that my life doesn't have a goal, and I can rest. I'm close to my goal, as more specifically
I hope to move 3 to 4 units a month. That is my goal in life, and it's what I've been averaging in
the last few months.
I know the initial impulse upon seeing my success, icon status, and fame and the success of it all
is to want to lay claim to it and be associated with it. You know, admit I'm the one responsible
for this or that famous or iconic thing happening, but the wisdom of experience in dealing with
true success has taught me I can't always act on impulse and lay claim to my success, whether it's
shared with others or not. Well that and I don't need to do things for money. I'm not out to make
a living. I'm out to do what I love. You need to let success be success, and don't automatically
shout out to the world "I'm with my success!" Tempting, but impolite. It's important to just let
things and people be as they are and just let the setting play out and grow naturally, not with my
aid.
Social Media and Google+ are so awesome. It has a chat and instant messaging feature and
everything. Katie Towers, Jennifer Almond, Chris Hess, Jonny Bartlett, and Danielle
Johnson (or as she prefers, Stoner Goth 187) all have accounts on there. I'm beginning to reach
out to all of them with the Instant Messaging and Chatting Google Hangouts Feature, which
apparently could replace Yahoo IM (YIM) as the go-to chat function of social media.
***

P a g e | 1246

Wednesday, February 25th, 2015, 2:22 p.m.,

I'm actually making some effort to attain a license and legally drive. But it starts with the 4 hour
online test and the learner's permit, which I am re-applying for finally. And it only took a
decade-and-a-half! G+ Friendtime is gonna have to wait.
Cary's a cheapskate. He's terrified of spending money excessively, which is the opposite of
myself. He has all this money to his name, yet he boycotts the spending of any of the cash.
What a dipshit.
***
20 years ago, before the internet made it okay, an American comic book artist and author
meeting and becoming friends with some of the most famous international animation auteurs in
the French and Japanese anime and manga world would have been unheard of. But the celebrity
friendship of John Lasseter and Hayao Miyazaki changed all that. It paved the way for
relationships like mine. Well lucked out and met John Lasseter at one of his film showcases after
the presentation. Kind of like an animation convention, but without the convention and just the
celebrities and films. The ambiance was one of goodwill and kindness. There was no fear, anger,
paranoia, or hatred in that auditorium. I'll never forget that. How at ease John Lasseter and the
whole experience made me feel. I met some artist celebrities (Phil, Jhonen, Todd, Dave) when I
was very young, and it set me on the right path of socializing with the rock stars of comics and
animation, the Rayarts, Chandra Frees, ABEs, Steves, Ramins, Otomos, Savins, and Romains of
later life. Ever since then the industry has had an aura of accessibility to me. But it's not about
fame or bragging rights. It isn't even about autographs or making money. It's about finding a
connection with your audience.
I do enjoy writing about my famous friends. But I'd much rather not share this information. The
relationships in my life are built on peace, participation, and trust.

Thursday, February 26th, 2015, 10:55 p.m.,

You know, I'm a better writer than I am an artist. I've got better literary chops than I do art chops.
But literature and words are vastly less influential, popular, and respected, than art is. But I
should never feel like I have to apologize for my ingenious literary abilities. You don't see artists
apologizing for being dyslexic and unable to write or form coherent paragraphs. So why should
writers have to apologize for having no conception of how to illustrate comic books or draw.
Friday, February 27, 2015, 5:52 p.m.,
Eventually, depending on where I live, I'd maybe like to start some beat generation inspired club
meet-up groups, and invite a small group of artists and writers, authors, and animators who like

P a g e | 1247

world comics and animation, to join through email and meetup.com. Either at a bookstore cafe,
or a library. I think forming a grassroots community of writers and artists who want wider
awareness of themselves and their work could help all our reputations.
And/or I'll throw a meetup party hang out with all my old friends, where we can chill out and
chat about our lives with the group.
Saturday, February 28th, 2015, 6:00 p.m.,
My work moves 3 units every 30 days. That's an average of 1 unit moved every 10 days or so.
In terms of writing, "Craft is about organization" and that is why an outline, and
mapping the novel is just as important as outlining your map of a script is when
screenwriting. I haven't outlined any of my novels, novellas, and major short stories
yet. It's time to hit the outline notations.
Outlines are the Missing Link for me. They're the key to the lock. The solution to the
puzzle. Notations linked with Outlines is how novels and scripts are built and
finished. If the concept for a story is the granite foundation, the outline maps and
notations connecting everything together in those books and scripts is the foundation
of steel beams which will propel that building into the sky and heavens!
Up until this point, I never outline any of my novels or shot stories.
But I did outline Druidon, End Times Vol. 1, Episode 1. With bullet point lists and
everything. That was my most successful outline ever. Correction. It was my most
successful outline YET. Now all my novels, scripts, and comics are going to be written
this way: With a series of hundreds pages of bullet point lists, and hundreds of pages
of scenes and scene transitions, plot points, beginnings, middles, ends (not in that
order while being written), and inciting incidents.
This outline technique and method is so effective, I'm never writing another script,
screenplay, cartoon, comic, short story, novel, or novella without an outline to start
it off with and guide it...Ever again!! I'm no longer allowing myself to write
stories, narratives, and scripts without a series of outlines.
With all this breakthrough theorizing, which will be put into practice soon enough
within then next 2 to 3 days, I actually feel like I finally stand a chance of
destroying my short story writer's block, along with my novelist's block,
screenwriter's block, and comic book writer's block. All thanks to my deep love of
outlining my work before I flesh it out with history, realism, description, action,
dialogue, plot, and narration.
One thing I learned from revising my writing is all my episode script outlines outside
of Druidon? Weaksauce. They're lacking key details, and it's not all cause-&-effet,
and each outline only has 3-5 bullet points, which is a pathetically low amount. I
need to make those at least 2-4 pages long of pure bullet point scene paragraphs and
character-story details. Fortunately I'm up to the task this time around. I will
elaborate on all of them in great detail, filling in their Swiss-cheese-like mosaic of
plot holes. And fill the form with some REAL content I haven't thought of or
brainstormed or daydreamed up yet. I'm fairly confident in my abilities to be up to
this task, too, so there is no insecurity or doubt that I can handle the task as long
as I sit down in this chair and write and brainstorm up the remainder of the plots.
All 7 or 8 of them, and dozens more! As soon as I come up with something.

P a g e | 1248
The same deal goes for Edward Richards and all my other ideas for novels, like OliverE and Lee Wonders.

P a g e | 1249

Saturday, March, 28th, 2015, 10:31 p.m.,

There were 2 innovative creative projects from other creators in the 90s that I'm
still borrowing elements from today, and it still re-invigorates my work, almost
like it were still fresh out of 1996.
Todd McFarlane's Spawn (HBO)
Johnny The Homicidal Maniac (Jhonen Vasquez)
Their vibe when I first discovered them for myself was unworldly, unlike any other
shows or comics I had ever seen at the time. Little did I know the rest of my life
would be spent in intense isolation and training trying to re-create a hybrid or
synthesis fusion of the best elements of those styles: Namely their heavy deep
canvas blacks and inks, and the gothed out vibe, the heavy themes of a dark lost
gothed out loner or "count" type character versus the simultaneously threatening
and wrecklessly encroaching organized forces of the outside world as well as the
supernatural battle between heaven and hell, God, and Satan, sharp, jagged angles,
unsettling concepts for their time, as well as their generally pitch black canvas,
with a poetic, dark and depressing tone. But I wanted to make them more action
packed. Jam as much wuxia action into them as humanly possible. Shaw Brother's
style.
***
In the world of Japanese animation, Japanese anime are almost always adapted
from Japanese manga comics. As it would turn out, really good comics more often
than not, translate to really good anime titles. So there's always hope for new
manga-ka trying to break out onto the scene. I can't speak for anime, but I'd like
to think there's hope in the field of adaptation as well.
It can be difficult to balance a traditional print publishing career (with e-books and
microblogging and whatnot [Art: Manifested; END TIMES]), with a more modernbased broadcasting content producer-provider career [ActionToonTV]. I walk the
line.

P a g e | 1250

I don't see why everyone thinks manga is drawn better than American comic
books. They're not. Indie comics? Yes. But Marvel, Image, and DC? No. American
superhero comics have a greater sense of detail. Yes, even Rob Liefeld.
Stuff I can't wait to try out:

Art Rage
Photoshop
Adobe Acrobat
Flash
Retas Pro
Manga Studio
***
Useful (very useful) Techniques

Visualization
Revision
Revising
Grammar and Spelling
Slow Reading
Outline
Thumbs
Choreography (pose day dreaming)

Probably one of the BIGGEST challenges of my sword fighting is it is one of the

areas where I make the biggest amount of things up. If drawing comics is rapping,
drawing comics is freestyling. You have to have SOME of the material already
prepared to lay down on the page, and you have to know what pose you want,
often by acting it out.
Acting it out is very important in drawing swordfighting. It's like "The Physical
Approach to Drawing".

P a g e | 1251

Dialogue is great for narrating a story or plot. Just telling what is happening in the
most blatant cases. "When we last left our heroes, they were last wandering
through the valley after a drunken encounter at Ye Olde Seedy Tavern," etc, and
whatnot. In a way using dialogue to sum up back story in a script is so easy, it
almost feels like cheating. That's some Rocky and Bullwinkle, Superfriends,
Pokemon level cheating right there.
With my sketches in my books, no less than every line is crucial and extremely
important. With each brushstroke, I am carving out the Definition of the Future of
Sword Comics. I'm Defining the Future of Not only a Very Specific Genre: Sword
Comics, but the way Artists Will Define Comics for The Rest of Its History and
All Throughout the Future. I'm Defining the Look of Comics. That is my Master
Builder Method and Technique.
On a good day, I can finish about 2 to 3 pages worth of gesture thumbnail sword
fighting sketches (i.e. "Sword Fighting Love"). My intensity is great, but my
stamina and endurance isn't, and plagued by fatigue passed down by genetics. My
drawings have this certain aura of intensity and energy to them.
My publishing Career is a Dream Come True
Allies & Underdogs
Amazon
Kindle
E-Books
E Commerce
Self-Publishing
Indie Publishing
Action and Adventure
Science Fiction and Fantasy
IDW
Amazon Marketing
Webcomics (G+, Blogger, Twitter, ComicFury)
Internet, Web.2.0

P a g e | 1252

Opponents or Thwarters
(the former fallen Status Quo)
the early 2000s
Traditional publishing
SLG and Oni Press
Adult Swim
Toonami
Cartoon Network
Kristie Lijewski
DeviantART
Tokyopop
Viz
Megatokyo
Agencies and Editors of "Mainstream" Publishers
Comic Conventions
Otaku and Anime fans

Also, I don't have any enemies or rivals in 2-12 children's cable TV animation in
America just like I don't have any enemies or rivals in the sitcom industry. It's not
my industry. No matter what they do or say, they're moving in the wrong direction
and pursuing something greedy and idiotic: Namely making animation that only
caters to children. This includes Manboy shows like family guy that cater to Adult
Children, young middle school teens, and not real adults.
***
Math and Metrix:
I earned my highest amount ever for one day total since my bestseller status has
gone into effect. I sold $70 worth of books in India in one morning/day. That
means so far I've learned on Amazon if you're a bestseller, you can make up to $70
a day or a lot more. $70 a day equates to $25,550.00 a year, or moderately wealthy.

P a g e | 1253

Amazon is a business. It works like a business. Amazon has begun thinking and
acting more and more like an all in one publisher, distributor, marketer, and
promoter in its own right. All you really need is the pages, the PDF files, or the
books and the content to publish online. That's what I ended up doing. Amazon has
unveiled its own content distribution venue, and I happened to have content to
circulate (END TIMES).
True. I'll admit I made it pretty damn far in the big scheme of things, on to the
bestseller manga and kindle list. Farther than most, in a way never done before.
BUT, I've got so much farther to go. So much more power do I need! I'm halfway
there. I have a fully realized comic book style for the most part if I count previous
pages and sequential art, what with my checkerboard art. But I remain firm in my
goal of optioning my concept of The End Times Post-Apocalyptic World to other
media, be it animation. I want to be the next Ninja Turtles, Conan, Akira, invader
zim, or Ninja Slayer. And I can't forget my various and assorted collection of allies
and business contacts. like IDW, Satellite, Titmouse, and Gonzo Digimation. I
don't know who will take an active part in my future career more than anyone else
does. Because it's impossible to know. It's never set in stone. The path of paydirt. If
it was, everyone would travel it, but it's not. It's not calculated like that.
Currently, my influences need to be animated, soulful, funky, and alive to
influence my pages. They have to dance off the page and be animated, especially if
they're static. I like that squash and stretch swingin' vibe. Funky.
Like the following artists:

John K
Rob Schrab
Greg Capullo
FSc
Tex Avery
Hiroyuki Imaishi
Kazuto Nakazawa
Hiroaki Samura
Thomas Romain
Jamie Hewlett

P a g e | 1254

Jim Mahfood
Doug TenNapel
Bill Watterson
Blacksad
Sam Keith
Min-Woo Hyung
Yasuhiro Nightow

In other words nothing too static.

I'm not digging on the soulless, static, dead, or lifeless drawings right now. I like
that high energy level drawing, pulsating with animation and bounce.
Tuesday, March 31st, 2014,
I'm still learning. Still getting the hang of online business networking and
schmoozing online with industry players, both male and female. I want to make as
many lifelong friends or at least co-workers, collaborators, and employees by
browsing and networking through ODesk, Freelancer, LinkedIn, Twitter, and G+.
It's important to make that decent social balance between new friends and
associates or clients and old ones.
While I could say I like 4 mediums: Comics, Novels (books), TV and Film, I'd
rather use the Umbrella Terms that branch out and parent those terms:
My specialty is both Publishing and Animation.
What you are now is what you are in reality, and I'm a bestselling author now, and
a popular artist and writer now, and so therefore I am the pro I've always wanted to
be in reality. People now expect ME to be the provider.
Is Adult Swim and Cartoon Network going to be prepared for when I Get my
OWN bestselling book, film, and show, and when I am a famous and professional
animation auteur making hundreds of thousands of dollars a year? I guess they'd
BETTER be prepared for it.

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Creativity and Creative Output relies on and interacts with:

Emotional State
Energy Level
Mind
Psychological State
***
Energy Level: 3/10, sickly
Emotional Mood: Depressed, Sick, quasi-horny
Well, if I don't draw, I won't blame myself.
Actually, I give myself permission to spend the entire day journaling if I feel like
it. Take the day off.
***
Friday, April 3rd, 2015, 11:42 a.m.
Some customers who bought some of my works on Amazon, also bought books by
JRR Tolkien, which is empowering and encouraging to know. People who buy
books buy Tolkien also buy books by CS Lewis, George RR Martin, JK Rowling,
Alan Lee, JD Salinger, George Orwell, Christopher Paolini, Stephen King, Frank
Herbert, and Neil Gaiman.
I'm walking yet another line in my life, the line between high culture and low
culture.
On one side I can tell the Highest of High fantasy and SF tales, with stories of
good and evil, heroes, and villains, God and the devil, World Religion, and
chivalrous knights. Science, Technology innovation. Dave Sim. JRR Tolkien.
Classical historical context. Europe and Asia. Classical painting and art. Classical
literature.
On the low end is the lowest of low society: Simple, crude, childlike artwork,
dealing with internet anime trolls online and hecklers in the comedy circuit, being
parodied in mainstream culture, internet pornography viewing habits, being

P a g e | 1256

harassed by stalkers and criminals with no taste or regard for privacy, being
imitated by crappy cartoons and webcomics by artists with no talent. Horror
stories. Pulp Literature. TV. Hollywood. the internet. Brian Johnston. Howard
Stern, Marilyn Manson. Eminem. White trash neighbors. Florida. Fashion and
celebrity.
Different Markets (Different Profits, Formats, Graphic Design, Marketing,
Audience)

Indie and Bestselling Novels and Nonfiction

Classic Novels and Literature by Classic Authors
Television Shows (Animated, International, Live Action, Short Form, Long)
Comic Books ("Floppy") Indie B/W & Mainstream Superhero
French Comics BD Tomes
Coffee Table Art Books
Video Games
Anime Series and Films
Japanese and American Manga
Music Albums
Hollywood Movies

Each of these mediums has their own branding genre and branding style.
I've finished 40 pages of End Times. 40-48 pgs. That's around 2 chapters worth.
But my pages aren't making enough sense. I'm successful and famous, yes, but I
need to brush up on my skills as a visual storyteller.
I'm ready to tackle End Times: Chapter 3, Genesis and the Noah comic "A day in
the life of". With Genesis, I'm going for composited or cut and pasted layering with
a lot of backgrounds and city architecture. It will also have action sequences. Every
detail will be planned out, thumbnailed, sketched, re-sketched, and heavily
rendered. And Noah will focus more on story and character, and dialogue, less on
action.
I'll tackle one to a few pages at a time. Just keep the routine. A few pages a day.
Pace myself and do a lot of thumb prelims. Prepare before I hit the table. Mentally,
visually, musically, emotionally, and physically. I've got a cold, so I'm going to

P a g e | 1257

have to put the comics at bay for now and not worry so much about delivering
more chapters like Eiichiro Oda or whatever.
Right now, I know I'm miles ahead of the competition.
But my true desire is to be Light Years ahead of the competition, not just miles and
countries.
"Noah" needs more prep work. Thank god I Finally have the 2 seperate pencils,
light and dark, for pencilling. It also needs a lot more development sketches for the
background (Shadow Op 7 offices), and more development sketches for everyone
and everything but Mono. So Jen, Noah, The Bosses, and Jim.
The Strength of a Comic Book, Manga, Novel, or Script's Planning...
...is determined by the Strength of its Execution and Follow Through.
What could be a better testament to Perfect Planning than Perfect Execution and
Follow Through. Action Determines Strategy. Or at least, it Should.
Ahh, I love writing/drawing panel thumbs. It's the most direct form of building a
panel for a script out of that ultimate void of dead space, Reminds me of when I
would write prose narrative describing the contents of anime TV shows like Yu
Yu.
Daily panel-thumb scripts-to-thumb sketches are important. I can do up to 20 - 30 a
day, because they're so small and don't require detail, just composition.
Current style I'm going for in my panel pages:
Conan meets Bone meets Scud meets Sin City, with Akira and GitS architecture
and city backgrounds with smoke and whatnot.
And with the writing of Mario Puzo's Godfather, and Arthuer Conan Doyle's
Sherlock Holmes literature.
But above all I am 100% doing my own thing first and foremost.

P a g e | 1258

Saturday, April 4th, 2015, 8:03 p.m.,

By now I have a lot of power. I'm at a powerful point in my life. I planted the seeds
of design and technology in the early 2000s. Now trees and forests are springing up
everywhere around the globe, in every corner of the world! Streaming video and
End Times media mythos. Not to mention my awesome face.
I have enough power. But I'm going to need a lot MORE power to achieve the full
effect of the product of my goals.
***
Sunday, April 5, 2015, 5:51 p.m.,
Talkin' Bout My Generation: The Millennials
The Millennials are going to be the generation that sets the bar high or low for the
coming Century: The Twenty-First Century.
I'm actually sort of in a position to inherit becoming one of both the Most
Influential, and Most Iconic members of the Twenty-First Century. In reality,
many already perceive me to be up there with Barack Obama, Christopher Paolini,
Aziz Ansari, Justin Bieber, and Mark Zuckerberg. All pre-established. I'm clearly
not that famous, but I am pretty famous in a folk legend kind of way. Being a
Twenty-First Century icon is a very stressful job. You get mocked and bugged a
lot. I'm a Twenty-First Century Polymath. A real renaissance man of the future era.
I win! I know, wow, never saw that one coming. What a shocker...
I'm getting sick of Google. They just toss me a lot of unnecessary B.S. and I hate
them for it. I'm seeing other websites now. That's right, I'm cheating on Google,
and I've never been happier.
***

P a g e | 1259

As it turns out, I'm not just a great drummer and percussionist and singer. I'm
actually a fairly efficient guitarist. I can play alternative, folk, pop, and metal. So to
simplify, I'm actually a fairly decent folk-metal guitarist, kind of like Liam Lynch
on "United States of Whatever", or Tenacious D on "Tribute".
My biggest musical influences as a guitarist currently are BNL (Barenaked
Ladies), They Might Be Giants, Darius Rucker (Hootie), Weezer, and Beach Boys.
Amplified pseudo-pop.
I sound a lot better on the electric guitar now that I have my new tool. My
amplifier and fuzz box distortion petal. It adds a lot of electricity to my musical
sound.
I'm working up to 2 to 4 minute long primarily instrumental songs.
***
Tuesday, April 7th, 2015, 9:15 a.m.,
Coffee in the Morning. Beer in the Evening. You know the drill.
Caffeine in the Day. Alcohol at Night
This Notebook Series I created was invented primarily to document, catalogue, and
chronicle my innermost concepts, ideas, memories, and thoughts.
When Stephen King starts writing fiction, it's tough to get him to stop.
Me? I'm trying to work up to that. But I'm just starting off. My stories are just
starting to get pretty good and fantastical.
My process is I start with a brief one or two/three sentence logline. A premise as
simple as anything written in a TV Guide or DVR episode description, and I
gradually build outward from there, growing and expanding to build a mood, and
create a cast of characters, and a world around that premise, and often times the
premise is the character or characters.
Never look back.
Smells like cruelty here in the South.

P a g e | 1260

The Pirate Bay and Rhapsody are such amazing sites! Yeah!!! I love those sites.
Unlimited free music, TV shows, and movies for very little, if any money.
Wednesday, April 8th, 2015, 4:20 p.m.,
Work on End Times is resuming. The thing is I know fans like to say manga is
"back in production", Books like Gintama and One Piece (two of my favorite
titles), but I'm equally afraid of making too much of a big deal and hype out of my
current workload. I'm just terrified of jinxing or intimidating myself out of a
consistent workrate. I can make comics and manga pages incredibly fast if I'm
really focused, but much of the time I lack focus. Working on it.
Anyway, it's all about Starting. Re-Starting. Everytime you resume work on your
book you're starting new work on an old book. End Times is 11 years old. At this
point I've been drawing it forever. But my confidence is increasing considerably.
I'm confident enough to just dive into it and start work.
By some miracle, I seem to be on my way to achieving becoming a popular
cartoonist. I am making money at my profession at this point, but marketing bills
are expensive, so I'm 2 dozen dollars short of earning $100 in royalties from my
book sales of more than 400 books sold, both free and and purchased in over 5
countries worldwide through Amazon Kindle mostly. I'm doing pretty well for
myself relatively speaking.
I'm growing more and more fond of the idea of pursuing an assembly line
production style, like a Jim Davis, Musashi Kishimoto, or Eiichiro Oda (the last
two coming from the Japanese manga industry).
I hope the mainstream media companies, book publishers, and comic book
publishers notice me at some point after I succeed in self-publishing through
Amazon. Eventually, I'd like to publish my work or sell ideas to L.A. and New
York literary and/or comic book agencies and publishers. That is still my long term
goals. I hope I achieve enough buzz to get noticed by the more mainstream players
of the industry.
***

P a g e | 1261

Thursday, April 9th, 2015, 9:51 a.m.,

I'm good at drawing architecture and city skyline landscapes. I want to draw cities
and buildings. Lots and lots of cities and buildings. I've drawn a lot of cityscapes.
But I love drawing them. It is my passion, so I hope to draw a lot more. At least
100 - 200 new pages based on photographs of architecturally based buildings and
cityscapes.
I finally started earning money off of my books and comics in 2015, at the age of
31. Benchmark year for me. I'm on my way to possible financial stability finally.
I'm closer than ever before. I finally don't have to rely on video piracy to make
money! Instead I'm finally seeing the opportunity to profit from my creative skills
and talent, which is how it should have been (like this) all along. I'm a manga and
self-publishing, and indie comics publishing success story. No one wanted to
publish my work other than me in the beginning. They all said I didn't draw at a
professional level yet. I got 80 dollars coming to me that says "I think they were
wrong". I sure showed them. I'll show them ALL!
Fantasy is easier to deal with if you stick to focusing on writing the tropes, and not
reading the Gobs & Gobs of poorly composed syntax, snooze-a-thon buildup, and
description that permeates a lot of High Fantasy literature. Fantasy isn't easy to
write by any means, but it's easy to do it badly, especially if it's a traditional
fantasy novel like Robert E. Howard, and not contemporary progressive fantasy
like Dave Eggers, Gao Xingjian, HP Lovecraft, Edgar Allen Poe, and Stephen
King. I was reading the Sword of Truth series and Arthur Rex. Both novels start of
excellently. I can't wait to use some of that sweet sweet monthly parental business
allowance to buy a whole bunch of fantasy and manga paperbacks.
***
Friday, April 10th, 2015, 1:34 p.m.,
Starting yesterday, I got a job offer through LinkedIn. My second Silicon Valley
job offer arrived in my inbox yesterday from a Cloud computing company.
Fortunately, while not an expert, I do have a considerable span of knowledge about
cloud computing. It's all about uploading and file management and storage, along
with a lot of coding and development. But the structure is pretty open and allows

P a g e | 1262

for a certain amount of freedom. I've been hoping to work in Silicon Valley.
YouTube and Google could be just the beginning. I'm a video engineer. I have
moderate experience with cloud video file and folder management and computing.
That is so cool! Raynart and Thomas Romain, two artists who specialize in the
Franco-Japanese anime and comic book market, discovered each other's existence
through my Twitter account and timeline. It's through me that they met! They're
kindred spirits, and I can completely see how they'd have a lot in common
My goal was and is, to Unite Silicon Valley, San Francisco, with Hollywood, in
L.A. California. I was off to a good start with masterminding streaming content
and old media with YouTube, Twitter, and social media, along with new media. I
split media in half: Old Media and New Media, hence inventing a LOT of
controversy and confusion in old media especially. All according to plan.
Doing manga is enjoyable and all. But you can't get out of financial debt with just
manga. I'm eventually going to settle down into a traditional job. You can get out
of debt with a day job.
In terms of where I see myself in 5 - 10 years, I'm hoping I'll be living somewhere
in Silicon Valley over in California over on the West Coast, working a job at an
established tech company, working my way up, and eventually funding and
managing my own startup production and manufacturing tech and media company
or companies. Pixar is located within Silicon Valley, and they started from
practically nothing, as did Bill Gates, Steve Jobs, Larry Page, Chad Hurley, and
Mark Zuckerberg. I don't see why I shouldn't do the same. Maybe a job offer is the
golden ticket to a fully paid for relocation and millionaire achievement. Jhonen
Vasquez went to school near or in Silicon Valley, and lived in San Jose. Yet
another example of someone who did well for himself in Silicon Valley. There's a
TON of NT Rationals and INTPs in Silicon Valley! I'd probably feel right at home.
The relocation itself is the most challenging part. I've got to have a strategy for a
smoother transition from nothing to something.

P a g e | 1263

Foreigner-English-Friendly Japanese Anime Studios

Gonzo
Trigger
Madhouse
Satelight
Sunwoo
Sav! The World

Sunday, April 12th, 2015,

***
Favorite Places. Top Markets of Interest:

Silicon Valley, California (Internet, Apps, Streaming Video, Cloud)

Paris, France (Franime, Bandes Dessinee Comic Book Tomes)
Tokyo, Japan (Anime Co-Productions)
Los Angeles, California (Screenwriting, Publishing, Television Animation)

Okay, I was developing 2 separate brand new stories in notation, rough, thumbnail,
and outline paneling form, but I've decided to make both stories into one story that
simply makes jump cuts between the two separate stories, giving the camera an
"editor's feel", what with the jump cuts and intercutting between two stories on two
separate ends of the spectrum. One felt like it had too much dialogue with nothing
happening, and the other felt kind of a little too much going on all at once. I like
the idea of still managing to get dialogue and action going on within one book. I
have around 15 pages of layouts or so, so far. So this stories looking to end up over
40 pages, because each half (of story) will be at least 20 pages long individually.
Editing the panels together so that they flow together amidst all that jump
cutting...will be a challenge, and it will be the longest story-centric panel layouts
I've been working at so far, so it's going to take a lot more development research
and drawings.
On END TIMES: Chapter 3 is going to be the latest installment of END TIMES.
Title Pending. I'm guessing it's going to be longer than only 20 pages. It's also
going to make more sense, look more polished, take longer to draw, and be more

P a g e | 1264

cohesive as a whole than Ch.'s 2 & 1. My goal is to make the books easier to read,
and more professional looking. I'm actually working with a strategy and planned
out logistical method on how to draw the panels and pages this time. Sounds like
fun.

I am manga-ka, hear me roar. I am Joseph Matthew Alberts. Also know by my

more famous Alias, James Michael Matthews (J.M. Matthews). And I'm an
American manga-ka. Author of the End Times literary saga and series. I am a
modern day master of action, drama, choreography, fantasy, and serious dialogue.
I've been getting way more powerful lately, as my manga, End Times is now one
of the top 30 most popular manga books being sold on Amazon's comics stores.
Pretty sure it's not going to make me arrogant. I'd probably lose some of my stature
if I became arrogant, so I'm vigilant.
***
Monday, April 13th, 2015, 5:09 p.m.,
On the plus side, my early attempts at developing skill at making comics and
drawings, and my obsession with my workload, and succeeding in general in the
very early 2000s doesn't seem so foolish, now that I'm actually successful and
sitting atop, or near the top of numerous bestseller lists of manga on Amazon. So
that's good. I really was building up and planning for bigger, better things.
My current dream is to take what I've achieved so far, and crank it up to the next
level. Rip the knob off! Work on starting my daily comic work sessions each time I
begin, and get really good at starting over each day to increase both my willpower
and self discipline.
I have a moderate amount of net worth, and an enormous amount of social and
cultural and media power. And you know what? I'm highly addicted to both of
them. I'm addicted to power. Now that I have all the power in the world, I'm
terrified of losing all or most of it. More so with power and influence than money
because I don't have a ton of money. But I have enough: $400-$500 a month, and a

P a g e | 1265

large army of fans of my work online. I'm doing and achieving very powerful
things, so naturally I'll always be needing a lot of even more of it. So yes, I am a
bit greedy and power hungry, but it's for respect and survival. If I don't keep my
power level up my powerful enemies will crush me. Because they too are feared
and have power, and they're always going to copy everything I do and attempt to
take cheap, malicious, and slanderous shots. They enjoy pulling rank on opponents
and rivals in the market.
When treading the shoreline of the Ninjaville Self-Publishing coastline, learn to
not leave any footprints in the sand that are too heavy or dense. In other words,
don't recycle the same material unless you've already done 5 - 20 times as many
pages as you started off with in the beginning. The first attempts at comic book
pages will always suck. Just ask Dave Sim. He's incredibly ashamed of the first
few issues of Cerebus, and only just recently has he learned to embrace them
instead of conceal them with recent illustrations for covers that mask the
amateurish nature of the early attempts. It's important not to recycle pages too
early. It doesn't matter how polished they are. Always choose moving on and the
start of the next new page over re-publishing first attempts. It's more productive,
and you can only get away with recycling pages for so long while no one is
looking or closely following your work like they inevitably will in the later years
of your career.
So, I have to choose. It's either choosing between maintaining my books presence
at the top of the sales charts, or maintaining a strong state of production qualities
and quality artwork and story for up-and-coming books that are unfinished, but
currently being worked on pretty heavily. I can either devote time to ramping up
sales or ramping up production on new, unseen material.
I relied way too much on structural intuition and structural improvisation, or
abstract rough unpolished design at the beginning of my career, as opposed to an
organized and structural daily multi-hour per day system. And at some parts of my
work, it showed. The frequent laziness showed. Not in much of my strongest most
polished work, but in the stuff on the opposite end. The lines were weak, flimsy,
crippled, uncoordinated, unmindful, and unfocused. I HATED the sketchbook
pages where I gave into the lazy artist mentality. It was one of my weakest
moments. Either I wasn't using reference material or I was tired, zapped out of

P a g e | 1266

energy, or depressed, and my hands were too weak to produce anything memorable
or beautiful. Glad I'm getting past that phase. The sloppy phase.
If you're life's not in order, chances are your comics page artwork aren't going to
be much different: Here are some of the hurdles and mountains I had to climb
between 2002 - 2014
Noise pollution, Noisy roommates and neighbors, not conducive to creativity
or quiet and silence
Constant tornados, storm clouds, and hurricanes
Malicious aura coming from the back and front streets and houses
Cloning and mirror tactics on behalf of the so-called "competition" (i.e.
American copycats and imitators with no souls).
People on drugs like marijuana and as a consequence becoming a disruptive
and dangerous presence
Depression in a depressing confining, and prison like environment
Not getting out and getting fresh air or exercise
Weight gain and fatigue or lack of energy
Not enough nutrients
Disorganized workstyle
PR Attacks and emotional warfair frome competing sources on the TV and
Computer and outsider media sources: Primarily of a negative, power play,
derogatory nature
Spies meddling in my business and sending viruses to my computer
Being the Center of the Media Universe, a so-called "Star".
Much of the stress I was experiencing at the time from a noisy, disrespectful,
chaotic, dangerous, toxic, energy vampire world and work environment was
reflected in the lacking quality of some of my drawings. It was a chaotic time for
the new history books in general. Fortunately I survived it, but just barely.
***
Planning out Tomorrow's (Tuesday) Work Schedule. Early pre-to-After noon.
Develop outlines for two stories, script for dialogue and plots (sequence of events
synopsis), in bullet point on a pad of paper.

P a g e | 1267

My 4 Main areas of expertise:

Professional: Screenwriting (Script), Short Stories (Novel), Manga (Comics),
Garbage: Memoirs (Journals), Sketchbooks (Art Archives)
***
Tuesday, April 14th 2015, 2:33 p.m.,
Okay. I did the work for the most part. Got started anew. I took one miniature
thumbnail abstract-rough sharpie marker panel that was miniature, and I blew up to
a full scale page (Vertical). My first panel done with reverse size adjustment,
making it bigger by hand instead of smaller by computer editing software. 1 preexisting panel down. Just 30 more pre-existing panels to go. Not counting all the
future new thumbnails I gotta sketch and mark in once I've gotten a fair amount of
the pre-existing panels fixed.
I've done 55 panel thumbnails (Small and large) in less than a month. I've got this
new sequential art drafting technique and strategy I'm eager to try out.
Thumbnail Panel Structuring
Thumbnail Panel Compositing
Like using a green screen, but with comics. Makes the work load easier to stick to
small, simple thumb sketches.
Believe Nothing Other's Attempt to Tell You
Trust No One
Running ahead of schedule on E.T., Ch. 3. Instead of 5 thumbs and sketches, I
have over 50.
Jhonen Vasquez: Not really an influence anymore. Used to be a heavy influence.
Now, I'd rather read Cerebus, manga, or something. Nny's world looks so flat and
boring to me in retrospect. It's not ambitious enough. Visually it doesn't feel
ambitious or artistic enough for me. I'd rather read Blade of the Immortal or
Claymore, One Piece, or DBZ.

P a g e | 1268

My strategy, work technique, and work organization skills are improving. I've
made lists for my series, and I'm crossing one thing off after another. In record
time.
End Times: Ch. 3 is running ahead of schedule and on time. This is the first time
I've ever worked on a comic and had my work routine and system work efficiently
and according to schedule. I stopped working for today and retired into the night,
because I want to savor this. No noticeable problems with bullying, fatigue, noise,
or procrastination. Everything is going according to plan and according to
schedule. This is the most efficient my schedule and work routine has ever been.
Computer in my room got hijacked-infected with a severe internet virus and
broke/died.
Going to have to shell out some money for a new one. Eventually.
***
Wednesday, April 15th, 2015, 12:46 p.m.,
Hurray!! I got my first negative review on Amazon this morning. Look out, here it
comes!
***
1.0 out of 5 stars

Matthews End Times is a disappointing amateurish effort with a non-starter of a story April 15,

2015
By Joe Frazier
Format:Kindle Edition

I'm reluctant to provide really negative feedback to authors, but this just seems like someone was bored at lunch, quickly
drew some stuff and thought, hey, I wonder if I can make this into a book. With the caveat that I don't read a lot of magna and
some who are more immersed in that genre may find some redeeming qualities, this just simply looks like lazy work. Not "onthe-edge cool and raw" but just lazy. Now let's get to the story, or lack thereof. There just isn't a story here. The book's main
benefits are no additional cost (I grabbed this through Kindle Unlimited) and the actual story is quite brief so you don't lose
much time with it.
Also, I'm not sure why the author includes "The Anthology" in the title but this isn't an anthology.

***
So he's saying it's an amateurish piece of crap and it sucks and has no story. I'd
become upset, but I feel that way about my own old work sometimes. I'm glad I'm

P a g e | 1269

moving on and working on something new to follow it up with. Some day I hope
people will understand why I started like an amateur when they see me improve.
New comics are coming along nicely. I'm teaching myself to spend more time
adding more detailing and structure to each panel. Treating each line with a greater
amount of care and form, considering using a ruler on straight lines. Also,
redrawing panels to add more details to each scene. My panels are increasing in
detail, by a lot. My old panels were very crude. But I think I'm finally starting to
outgrow the overt simplicity and crudeness of the panel form. I'm also giving my
individual panel image-boards a more horizontal and vertical axis, or grid to draw
them in, where I shrink the composition down on my page, and draw it smaller
than I need to, just to see if I can.
I can't publish individual panels before pages and stories are finished. I'm going to
be drawing some very amazing, mind blowing stuff, but I'm the only one allowed
to see it. It must remain secret and confidential until I have at least 10 pages of
storied & paneled sequential art. There's going to be no new uploads to ComicFury
OR Google+ Anime Gallery or Blogger OR Twitter, for at least until the end of
May. Hopefully people won't go too far spiraling into a crazy depression for lack
of updates. But I sense that's how long drawing a story with actual real highly
detailed panels is going to take.
Without money, permission, or support, no one is or ever will be or become
independent and self-sufficient. I'm certainly not. I don't have any of those things.
My writing and literature comes from my heart, spirit, and soul...
My artwork comes from a much more mysterious, abstract, mythical and
secular place. A place with a lot more void and emptiness in it than my
writing. It's harder to do art than writing for me because the process doesn't
come as naturally. I constantly have to force it out of my mind onto the page,
and often only with creative aiding material like videos, music, art books,
and comics.

P a g e | 1270

I never have any of my own money 99% of the time. It's all OPM (other people's
money). My parents and small loaned fortunes. Or video piracy (exploiting the
economic complexities of the technology I invented). It's never actually any of my
money. The only money I ever actually earned is the $98 I've earned on Amazon
in royalties. Or the supermarket courtesy clerk money I made as a supermarket
bagger in 2000-2001. Everything else was borrowed or loaned. Not a lot. But even
with the Amazon "Bestselling Manga" I produced, I don't see dime one of those
$98 my books "earned" until my profits earn $4-$5 and "exceed the $100
threshold", which is actually a more common occurrence among online royalty
payment systems than these companies would care to admit. ESPECIALLY
Google, what with them withholding the first $100 from creators profits as a selfcreated payment withholding system. I honestly do feel they pull that crap just to
mess with low paid creators and online personalities so they have a tough time
recouping their expenditures.

P a g e | 1271

P a g e | 1272

Thursday, April 16th, 2015, 2:36 p.m.,

Time magazine is right. I'm not, people like me aren't afraid of being judged or
ridiculed in the process of achieving greatness.
A LOT of people attempt to judge and ridicule me, but normally I just write them
off. They're more annoying than could ever be "insightful". Like most people who
judge and/or ridicule me, they vastly overestimate their own propensity toward
"insightfulness" and vastly underestimate their own propensity toward
"annoyingness". The result. A lot of people who are overwhelmingly annoying, yet
who are extremely convinced they're actually insightful. They're not! Their form of
self evaluation is INCREDIBLY self-delusional. But that is hardly surprising.
There is something about the scale of my audience that's changed. The stage upon
which I draw and write my pictures on has increased in size. And I'm finally
drawing comics with detailed artwork, thanks to compositing, page cropping, and
thumbnails.

P a g e | 1273

Wow. I guess my planning and strategy worked. My comics pages have started
becoming insanely detailed with linework and texture.

If I'm grading this page, I give it an A+.

Drawing this page took at least 1-3 hours.
I put real work into it, and it shows!
I wasn't looking at anything really when I drew most of the page above. I was just
focusing on each panel individually and quite heavily. Nothing was occupying my
mind other than making each panel as structured and detailed as I could. However,
the art kind of reminds me of Oda's One Piece, where it's simple and cartoonish,
but each page and panel still tends to have a lot of linework, density, and textures.

P a g e | 1274

I find I do my best work when I'm NOT seeking more power through my pages. I
kind of just want them to be good, to be high quality. I want to be happy with my
own work, and as long as I'm refining the prototype of my pages, or breaking even,
I'm happy.
Currently reading, comics:

A Drifting Life by Yoshihiro Tatsumi

The Savage Sword of Conan by Marvel
One Piece by Oda
Akira by Katsuhiro Otomo

Currently watching:

Blaze Blue: Alter Memory

Kaze No Stigma
X: TV (CLAMP)
Maria: The Virgin Witch
Teen Titans: GO!
Steven Universe
Inuyasha: The Final Act
***
"Never draw what you can swipe."

I'm taking the day off from drawing comics or writing stories today, in honor and
memory of the passing of one of my pet cats who died today. It's just too
depressing to work, even if drawing is the purpose and meaning of my waking life.
I lost a pet that was close to me, so naturally I need some time off from my job,
even if it is going awesome at work. I'm too depressed and emotionally drained
from the loss of a good friend and pet to keep drawing.
***
Alternate Realities, good and evil, all competing for our attention. It seems to be
how the future is rigged. Against the public.

P a g e | 1275

Around 40% of the work I was developing got left out of the final draft of my story
so far. I put it in the "cutting room floor" folder. Chipping away at the fat, making
the project leaner. For whatever reason, I stopped working on that portion of the
story, and refocused my energy to the part that WAS working, the part that I'm not
worried about the quality of.
***
Sunday, April 19th, 2015, 8:20 a.m.,
I don't care WHAT creepy televangelists say.
Ethics and Humanity without God isn't Godless. Chaos is.
I'm a believer in secular spirituality and ethics, and just because some preacher in
Memphis or wherever says differently isn't going to get me to change my mind.
We should be so lucky to exist in an era where ethics, compassion, spirituality, and
humanity exists in the societies outside the Christian churches. But why is the
Christian Church so terrified of being replaced by Rational Thought and Secular
Humanism? God forbid Christianity would stop being relevant. Preachers these
days say a lot of different things. They all think one another are going to Hell.
That's sad when not even the Church agrees with itself anymore.
"God is Dead."
-Nietzsche
I've never understood why minorities in America cling to God and Christianity so
much. God isn't going to stop racism and prejudice. He actually might increase it.
You know, I never thought to submit my books I've published to art school and
Universities as a portfolio piece to generate financial aid to assist me in going back
to college or art school and becoming a more self-sufficient and established
professional. I'd love to go to CalArts to study animation, and make student films,
and network with fellow students and faculty, and make friends and contacts.
Learn to socialize in Toon Town. CalArts is one of the best places to study
animation. A part of me has always wanted to attend there. I love college and art
school.

P a g e | 1276

There's a reason CalArts is such a famous school with such a high animation
industry placement ratio. It's stationed smack dab in the middle of Los Angeles
(L.A.)! Where all the Hollywood and L.A. studios are. You are surrounded by
industry veterans and opportunities for employment. It took me a while to realize
that while I might know animation very well, there's still people with work
experience who know a lot more than I do, things about how to run a production,
start a studio, get hired, attract talent, and manage day to day strategic operations
with cast and crew. I've already done a lot of illustrative work, much like Alex
Toth. I just need to figure out how to adapt my design and illustration style to
animation the way Alex Toth, Katsuhiro Otomo, Jhonen Vasquez, and Tim Burton
all did. The vast majority of getting work is being where the work is.
Main elements and components I want to incorporate into my animated films:

Japanese and French influence

Design-Heavy Illustration
Attention to detail
Literary scripts
Costume Design
Lighting and Shadow Design
Organic Architecture
Production Design
Action, Fantasy, Choreography and Violence
Serious Drama
Cinematic Camerawork
Draw things exactly as they're seen in the finished product (illustration: Alex
Toth)

For my art, I have a very take it or leave it attitude.

22 Law of Manifestation uncovered a revelation recently. It's not your desire to
achieve your goals and your focus on that goal and desire that's stopping you.
Supposedly, it's the fear and intimidation you feel at the thought of NOT getting
what you want out of life and your goals, work, and career. The thing sabotaging
you from succeeding is the fear of failing to attain the things you want! Brilliant! It
creates a lot of unneeded opposition and aggression.

P a g e | 1277

I changed my name from Joseph Matthew Alberts to James Michael Matthews, or

J.M. Matthews. Unofficially, of course. I want to become good at re-inventing
myself, re-inventing my life. Become a different person than I was, not stay the
SAME person my whole life.
That's interesting, in France nowadays, on the Dargaud publishing website at least,
in the professional French Bandes Dessinee scene, French cartoonists and creators
are referred to in English terminology as "designers", and writers, or artists and
"designers" who double as comics writers are dubbed "screenwriters". Reminds me
of the whole French auteur filmmaker debate thing, except it's referencing comics,
and they using new words and terminologies with new meanings.
Monday, April 20th, 2015, 1:13 p.m.,
That's my new dream, post animation and comics: Creative Publishing Retail.
Running and Building my own Bookstore
Attending Stanford and CalArts
Living and Working in L.A. / Silicon Valley, California
Oh boy! Left over fortune cookie. It says:
"Past inspirations and experiences will be helpful at work or school"

Woo-hoo! Maybe it's talking about CalArts and ways to leverage my past
accomplishments to get accepted and admitted to their school. Stuff like End
Times, Art: Manifested, Amazon, YouTube, and the Journals series. Or my mad
editing and writing skills.
I'm NEVER gonna be as famous as Tim Burton! I guess I can live with that. I
probably won't even live to see Jhonen Vasquez or Dave Sim or Frank Miller level
fame.
Naturally, I do like certain Disney films, and some DreamWorks films. But
honestly, I want to see if a short film can be made to be designed in a more
illustrative Katsuhiro Otomo or Dave Sim or Todd McFarlane style manner,
without it seeming overtly Japanese, or without any of negative Japanese clichs
like Bug Eyes and Cute little doll-like girls. I hate that latter stuff. I like the idea of
making a short film illustrative, shadowy, ink black, and cinematic without making

P a g e | 1278

it seem clich and selling out. I guess you could say I'm trying to achieve a modern
day animated Expressionist and Film Noir vision.
***
Tuesday, April 21st, 2015, 5:41 p.m.,
I have an I.Q. of 130. I've had a 130 I.Q. my entire life. Even in my adult life. I
have a high amount of visual, literary, creative, auditory, technological, and
analytical intelligence. I'm also a self-made polymath. And I have hypergraphia.
Product-Market Fit is kind of my niche specialty. I'm good at discovering new
products and finding ways to apply them to the market.

Broadcasting
Streaming
Live Streaming
Apps
Software
Ebooks
DVD Authoring
Video Ripping
Anime
Comic Books (Kindle)
Adwords
Google
Amazon

Clearly the winning combination is I don't bend myself to fit the market. I use my
super-genius to make the market bend to me. To my will. I don't conform to the
tech and business market...The tech and business market conform to me.
Ripping is a relatively new, extremely controversial software technology. Ripping
is essentially a reverse-engineer style nickname for what is known in tech circles as
"DVD Decryption". Decrypting the data on a DVD disc. Hacking the data-content.
Breaking the code. It's viewed as a threat because it found a way around the

P a g e | 1279

system. It's a form of hacking the Hollywood and Japanese industries really hate,
mostly because they will probably never figure out how to control it.
Drawings become ripe and stale in my mind and imagination, often depending on
how old and associated with the past they are.
If a drawing or comics page achieves too much age, maturity, wisdom, and oldness
in my mind, I'm less motivated (and likely) to work on it. I've got to find ways to
keep the material new, ripe, alive, current, and fresh in my mind, otherwise it risks
going stale. It's like bananas. To me drawings have a shelf life.
Update to plan. I now have to work on a way to preserve my excitement and
momentum. Once the initial momentum has subsided. Not easy, but I'm sure
there's a way.
***
Wednesday, April 22nd, 2015, 12:53 p.m.,
Ahhh. The fans are chatting...
"Nice to see End Times is alive and well"
- Fan A
"End Times is Dead!"
- Fan B
Finished another pg. of Thumbnails this early afternoon. I now have around 3
comic book pages worth of miniature thumbnail layouts or so, all ready to go for
the future. I'm starting to have a better idea of how I'm going to be approaching the
next few pages and page layouts and panel layouts of my comic book scene. This
is a long scene. I'm not sure if it's going to have sound effects and dialogue. Not
bad for a "dead" comic! ha ha.
***
We all influence everyone we come into contact with, both directly and with
technology, for both better and worse.

P a g e | 1280

Finally. FINALLY! I am drawing panel thumbs on a regular basis. And I'm putting
more preparation and labor into my panels. Something I should have done years
ago to save time, yet I haven't actually applied from theory to action until just
recently. Also, I'm earning money from my comics. If I didn't know any better I'd
say I wasn't even an obsessive hobbyist anymore, but rather a real professional
cartoonist.
Daily assignment for Thursday: Develop Comic Book Script for Scene 2. Scene 1
draft 1 thumbs are complete. Time to flesh out scene 1 pages/panels and further
develop the story-script for scene 2. I haven't decided what's going to happen yet.
Need to retain the layering.
***
Friday, April 24th, 2015,
My career is disheveled...but alive and intact.
My products are divided into 6 categories:

Books
Art
Stories
Tech
Comics
Websites

According to my Amazon Author Central Stats,

I'm the 12,000th most popular author out of the 1.2 million authors on
Amazon.com
If you do the math, I'm in the top 1% rank of Amazon author popularity. 12K is 1%
of 1.2 million.
To put it another day,
my popularity on Amazon ranks in the top 1% of all published Amazon authors.

P a g e | 1281

So, what's it like on top. What's it like to be able to rest on my laurels and just sit
back and appreciate the fact that I'm in the top 1% of authors on Amazon in
popularity ranking, the Biggest Bookstore in The World. Not going to lie. It feels
great!
Saturday, April 24th, 2015, 4:13 p.m.,
"I hope that by now my silence is deafening"

-Frank Miller
I love that quote. That definitely feels quotable to me. I wish I was that good at not
speaking out.
The Beast Hungers for innocence...
I make a good diplomat. Not to toot my own horn or anything, but I excel at racial,
cultural, and international diplomacy, without putting a lot of effort into it. I'm
VERY diplomatic when people actually bother to give me a chance. I'm not
inclined to racism, hatred, or discrimination. NFs are better diplomats than NTs.
but technically I'm 50/50 both. I inherited my tolerance, so it's cool.
Saturday, April 25th, 2015, 8:16 a.m.,
I got an invitation to join theprose.com, a literary social media writing site kind of
like Twitter, Tumblr, and Scribd. It looked interesting, so I signed up and joined
their network. Sounds like fun.
***
Let's get started, shall we?
King Odysseus
Odysseus is the King
Odysseus, he is the True King...
For an Odyssey's Journey across the Valleys, Mountains, Forests, and Seas, in
search of Salvation. The Odyssey of the Savior.
I'm not a terrible person. I just enjoy causing pain.

P a g e | 1282

And more Players in the Narrative shall reveal themselves as time goes on.
I believe that is the key to gaining the social upper hand that I did not see.
Confidence. Visualization, of confidence and strength. I'm strong but I lack
fortitude and confidence due to my social phobia and social anxiety, and I don't
believe in medication or drugs, as they are not the answer. They key to dealing
with fear, conflict, and other people's anger and open hostility, is to visualize
myself being confident and brave and strong even WHEN people oppose,
challenge, isult, mock, judge, belittle, bully, threaten, yell at, laugh at, attack,
mimic, and slander me. I have to visualize the attack and the attacker in full force,
and visualize myself not being affected at all by it, even standing up to it if
circumstances warrant. And they will. To have no fear, to attain confidence, I must
first use my Zen and Master Builder Law of Attraction 22 powers to have no fear
by visualizing an image in my head of myself, or a version of myself, outside
myself, having no fear or lack of confidence when attacked or confronted. And I
have to visualize the attacker, too, and whatever his voice sounds like, so I'm
prepared. for whatever game he's playing, whatever illegal marijuana-induced
tricks he's got in his little ghost neighbor bag.
When I move out, if those guys ever move out of the neighborhood, and I'm rich,
I'm going to pay someone to pay the realtor to buy their houses...Just so I can leave
em empty with no pricks living in them to torture the neighborhood. That or
demolish em with a bulldozer.
This is comics, it's publishing, art, and books, and manga, but it's also Rock n' Roll
to a certain extent
Don't worry! I can assure you I'm still quite alive.
***
I'm quite OCD about my practicing habits for drawing, and especially writing.
Obsessive Compulsive Disorder. I practice writing and art obsessively and
compulsively
This journal den is going to switch channels. My journaling home will now be
Edward Richards' file. Please adjust thoughts accordingly.

P a g e | 1283

Sorry for dropping by here again journal, I'm still going to stay in then Edward
Journal, but it will be for things related to Edward's (and my) world.
I'm addicted to drinking energy drinks and mastering skills.
Everything difficult and challenging to learn and execute is a skill:
List of Skills Available to Master

Computer Science
Digital Painting
Playing Accoustic Guitar
Playing Electric Guitar
Learning Tablature and Chord Progressions
Holding and picking and strumming a guitar
Writing Computer Code
French Speaking
French Writing
French Reading
Japanese Speaking
Japanese Writing
Japanese Reading
Drawing Anatomy (hands, arms, heads, faces, ears, eyes, hair, noses, fingers,
torsos, pelvic areas, crotches, breasts, necks, legs, feat, body language,
emotions, foreshortened limbs
Drawing Perspective
Drawing Cloth, Fabric, and Light and Shade
Drawing Propss, Buildings and vehicles
Drawing Comics
Drawing Comic Panel Layouts
Drawing Thumbnails and Storyboards
Drawing Camera Angles
Drawings Fighting, Fight Scenes, and Fighting Poses
Drawing Detail
Drawing Architectural and Landscape Production Design

P a g e | 1284

Costume Design
Screenwriting, Scriptwriting
Novelist Writing
Short Story Writing
Storytelling
Meditating
Reading
Web Design
HTML
Singing and Peforming
Traveling
Driving
Cleaning
Exercise
Strength Training
Weight Loss
Weight Lifting
Stamina
Songwriting
***

Tuesday, April 28th, 2015, 3:11 p.m.,

Finished reading my old Gloomcookie trade paperback (by Serena Valentino and
Ted Naifeh), the first Volume. Was saving that gem for the right day and the right
time - Which is now apparently, old lucky Tuesday. Gloomcookie influenced a lot
of my artwork in the last 14 years. I constantly referred to and sought out issues of
that series for inspiration. My styles broken off a bit, but still, to this day I'm still
heavily influenced by Gloomcookie. Reading the paperback of the first volume I
own gave me a deep and profound sense of satisfaction and closure, like I finally
got to close the book now that I could maintain my focus for a few minutes. It's
one of my favorite "goth manga" this side of Johnny the Homicidal Maniac, also
published by Dan Vado and SLG. I was even thinking of adapting the trade into a

P a g e | 1285

spec screenplay, I liked it so much! I myself am a bit of a macabre goth at heart as

well.
***
Wednesday, April 29th, 2015, 1:32 p.m.,
At my highest I weighed 355 lbs.
Today, I weigh: 325 lbs.
According to this scale, I lost 20 lbs....
I'm interested in Discovering new and underground markets: Such as:

American Alternative and Indie Comics

Japanese Manga
Korean Manwha
Chinee Manhua
Chinese Wuxia Culture and Cinema
Soleil
Dargaud
Shaw Brothers Studio and Golden Harvest
Chinamation
Franime
French and Pan-Asian Co-Productions
French Bandes Dessinee
Canadian Indie Comics
***

Current two main sources of income:

Book Sales
Banner Ads
So now, I'm in the infant stages of having a yearly income, through Amazon and
ComicFury. How much money I could make is completely up in the air. End
Times has an audience of a few thousand people, which is actually successful by

P a g e | 1286

indie comic standards, and that's good because it's an indie alternative comic book.
I am NOT, I repeat NOT a MILLIONAIRE.
However, my Amazon ad campaign made 3 million impressions, and my Adwords
campaigns made 8 million impressions in under 2 years. I've also earned over $104
in profits
If Adwords and Amazon are to be trusted, I got 4 million impressions on my
Amazon campaign, and 8 million impressions on my Adword campaigns.
That means my overall DBZ Power Level is 12 Million.
***
Thursday, April 30th, 10:03 a.m., 10:03,
Pretty sure I earned around $142 in profits from publishing sales. But that's just a
hunch.
My best stats and profit will be incredibly high, but never transparent unless I let
them be. No one will know about the. Google and Amazon will conceal them very
well from the public.
Edward Richards' science-fiction saga and the End Times saga are going to be
getting a scheduling and routine overhaul. I'm going to be working on them much
harder now. I'm going to involve more time writing them, now that I realize if I
stick with it there is a high likely hood I could make a living with them through
Kindle bookstore, eventual agents and mainstream publishers and all that. I'll be
making short books, a mere 100 to 150 or so pages. And I'll be providing rough
work for both compulsively. I'll be carrying a sketchbook with me, and on that
sketchbook I'll be jotting down comic book sketches, thumbs, and layouts, and
layout thumbs. And the Edward Journaling Restriction still applies. I'm just not
writing these strategic work theories over there but here instead...or is that yet
another excuse from me for not working hard WITHIN the restrictions of the
physical journal? Hard to tell.
Achievement!
I've written-&-drawn 2 #1 Amazon Bestsellers in the last 2 months.

P a g e | 1287

I can believe myself and my work are actually commercial and profitable now.
People have been profiting OFF OF ME without compensation for years, but I had
never made a lot of money striking out on my own, so I'm very happy for and
proud of myself for achieving my dream, or at the Very Least, being off to an
amazing start at it. I guess these things happen if you reach your early 30s and live
long enough to see your early and mid 30s.
What I learned about Network Security and OS PCs:
Wired security is nonexistent. Any PC plugged into a wall without a wireless
router isn't safe. Wireless Laptops with wireless routers, mobile Portable
Operating Systems, and Wi-Fi devices with WPA (Wi-Fi Protected Access 1 and
2), are the only technology hackers and Wi-Fi stealers can't access. It's one way to
protect your identity, privacy, and information: Go Wireless Networking. This is
how most safe networks STAY safe. Any of Dad's PCs isn't safe as long as it needs
to be plugged into a wall to function. Wireless is an Amazing Shield to protect
myself from The Age of Ultron. Not only is wireless safer. It's immune from Wi-Fi
thieves and viruses.
***
May 1st, 2015, 11:27 a.m.,
This must be my lucky week. I authored a No. 1 Bestseller, I made 5 million
impressions, I sold 13 books than another 8, I went to the gym, my webcomic got
5,000 hits, I read 6-8 books cuz my energy drink made me focused. I earned over
$144, and I'll be getting paid $100 in a month from now.
Strive to make Perfect Comics, not Mediocre or I Tried Ones. Mediocre
Aspirations and Self-Esteem produce Mediocre Results. Strive for Japanese level
Perfection in Making Art, Any time and Every Time. Strive for Masterpiece,
Masterwork, Genius, and Ingenious Japanese-Level Otomo-&-McFarlane Level
Perfection. Don't let the Screaming, Yelling Monster Machine of an Army of
Mediocrity discourage you.

P a g e | 1288

Note to self:

Draw Bigger
Draw Longer (more time on Each Piece)
Draw More Thumbs
Draw Each Panel Per Page Individually
Draw as though I'm Japanese and being paid per Page
Remember How Much Money I'm Getting Paid for All This
Avoid: Too much fretting and preliminary planning/theorizing, just work on
starting and continuing to start
Draw From Other Artists. All My Favorite Ones...
There. Was looking through my sketch folder. Problem is solved. I know how I'm
going to approach my next handful of pages and the general scene. At least 2 - 7
pages worth. The thumbnails were done a long time ago, but I was struggling and
having a bit of trouble figuring out how I was going to make it real, sketch it up,
and figure it out. But I figured it out. I let the roughs and brainstorming material
(thumbs, storyboards) sit there for a week, and upon looking at the rough material
with a fresh pair of eyes, I know what I must do. The solution was in the
background architecture, which I already drew a long time ago. Special thanks to
Tom Hart for really showing me how to work through a page....
Pgs. 1 - 16 of my story were mapped out with storyboards a long time ago, and
earlier this evening. It's really just a matter of time before I flesh each panel out,
just like before.
Anime, manga, and BD are often still amazing, but I can't relate to what on
American TV Airtime like I used to be able to. I can't at ALL relate to what I'm
seeing on TV most of the time. I can't relate to it, identify with it or anything at all.
I can still relate to my own artwork, as I'm sure other people can, too. I can relate
to and identify with YouTube. But not daytime TV though, or even a lot of
nighttime TV. I feel like I'm being persecuted by the people making the shows or
something. It's fucking weirdo.

P a g e | 1289

And the month of April comes to a close, demolished by the month of May. Spring
and Summer, I think.
https://myspace.com/photoport/photos
My wife, Nicole, is on MySpace! Ah! Cool! So many awesome sexy-cool retro
nuclear family punk rock chic photos.
***
Saturday, May 2nd, 2015, 5:52 p.m.,
I'm earning anywhere between $100 - $150 / month. That's my salary for royalties
on work I already finished work on a while ago
Completed work:
Thumbs for first 16 panels
1st Detailed Page Completed
***
Huzzah! I unveiled the World's First U.S.-based e-commerce North American
Bande Dessinee specialty online shop, co-owned by Amazon Europe Associates! I
have both cultural and first mover advantage.
***
Sunday, May 3rd, 2015, 4:39,
Bande Dessinee Store, The World's First United States authentic BD retailer, the
one I built and stocked myself (Powered by Amazon France), is open for business
(online). This retailer is based on the success I experienced selling copies of my I
own work through Kindle of Amazon America. I was already selling books. Just
not general books by other people like a Borders or a Books-A-Million. I'm
wondering whether I should aim the majority of my marketing at America, or
France. Hopefully both.
I'm a retailer, a publisher, an author, a writer, and an artist-illustrator. I'm doing
pretty well for myself. I have more things in my life to brag about now than ever
before, yet somehow I don't at all feel like indulging my ego or bragging, or

P a g e | 1290

showcasing anything I do. I'm just going to let the Empire run on autopilot. May as
well.
I know the industry like to be all "incredibly secretive" about its accounting and
sales figures, and with good justification I suppose, especially considering what a
big deal the fans and journalists make about it, but I don't really have bosses or
editors or producers who breath down my neck to make sure I keep the same level
of secrecy. It's a strategic advantage to not disclose accounting information. That
kind of thing is legally protected in the court of law, so I know it's not exactly
something I should take lightly, I suppose. People like to disclose a lot of intel
about me, which technically against the law, too, yet no one seems to do anything
about it. They don't touch the facts and figures though, as it's protected by
companies like Amazon Worldwide. They protect my intel just as much as ANY
Hollywood accounting firm or Japanese accounting first would protect Hollywood
and Tokyo sales figures. It's a strategic thing more than anything. Keeping secrets
is good for your safety and health.
Next Steps to Take
Adwords: Use with Amazon Merchants for my new BD Store
AMS: Pay off part of bills w/ part of allowance
Things to buy: Bank Account, Laptop chord, Desktop, Funi,
Crunchroll, books, SNES Chords, Ninja Slayer, Nobunaga The Fool,
Blaze Blue, Windows Media Player.
Total Payments: Allowance / Fr. / KDP (May - Early June) (Late June July)
Comics: Keep structuring work and developing it methodically. Don't
take too long to get back to work.
Continue stocking store (Fr. BD)
Translate store into English
I find 2 main things help me to stay focused and on task:
Counting my money, every dollar.
Updating my web accounts
Drawing new material and stories for my manga-goth series.

P a g e | 1291

I've got the magical alchemical ingredients for starting my own e-retailer:
A Limitless stock and supply of killer publishing product? Check.
Nice little easy to navigate digital store that's easy to browse and order
from? Check.
A specialty International Niche Market? Check.
Public awareness of my product and store? Working on it!
I finally found a few business venues I can succeed at.
Those 2 business books I bought...
Starting an Online Business For Dummies;
The Complete Idiot's Guide to Starting a Web-Based Business
...sure will probably come in handy in some useful way I'm sure.
Monday, May 4th, 2015, 1:31 p.m.,
Mad Famous.
In terms of name recognition, Amazon Comics Anthology Bestseller list ranks my
book as the third ranked bestselling Anthology list on Amazon.com.
In other words,
My book, Mono Megamix, gets placed right next to the anthology works of the 2
Greatest American Cartoonists in the World today:
Bill Watterson (Calvin & Hobbes) and Charles M. Schulz (Peanuts).
Honestly, I hope I do live up to expectations.
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Tuesday, May 5th 2015, 5:13 p.m.

I really hope I get this job I'm interviewing for, or at the very least, getting in
contact for.
Sears might want to hire me as a Social Media Strategist to help them with their
online presence. It's going to be my job to start off re-assuring them, and selling
them the very correct notion that I am the right candidate for this job. I certainly
have enough experience leading social media. Helping a company as enormous as
Sears is something I didn't expect, but I'd love to give it a try. It could potentially
pay very well, so well that not even one year into the job, all my loans and debts
would be paid off. I do hope they know I don't live in Illinois though. I hope it's a
stay at home social media job. May as well be. It is online after all.
But it's all about Sears. I'm to Sears what Cary Alberts is to Walgreens. Or at least
I WILL be. Or I HOPE TO BE. Sears is my day job. Book publishing and selling is
kind of a hobby. Selling and publishing books pays all right I suppose, but
nowhere near as Sears would pay if I landed that full time job (between $30-$70K
annual salary, from what I've research on the topic of Social Media Strategists and
yearly wages.