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Summary............................................................................................................1
The Cliffs of Dover............................................................................................2
Summary
Entry for the Age of Edward 2010 contest. A story of love and loss in the midst
of war. Set in England and France during WWI. Please note: this is labeled
tragedy for good reason. You have been warned! AH EPOV Rated M for
graphic descriptions.
Isabella was always at her side, sometimes helping, sometimes playing. She
was just my age, and I would sneak down after my studies to be with her. She
hadn't had much schooling, but her mind was quick and her imagination highly
developed. She fascinated me.
Pretending she was the Queen of England, I would play her humble servant. If
she wanted to play Robin Hood, I was her Little John. To her King Arthur, I
was her faithful knight of the round table. I only wanted to please her, love her,
follow her to the ends of the earth if need be. She owned my heart and soul
completely and unequivocally from our first meeting. As far as I was
concerned, the sun rose and set according to her whims.
When we were twelve, she let me kiss her hand. When we were thirteen, she let
me kiss her cheek, and when we were fourteen, she allowed me to sneak a peck
on her lips. I wanted to marry her.
I made the mistake of announcing my intentions at breakfast one morning. The
clatter of dropping silverware and my parent's dismayed faces shocked me into
silence and after that, Isabella's joyful presence was banished from my home,
her mother replaced with another.
A year passed in which I thought about Isabella every day, but never laid eyes
on her. She was the center of all my boyhood fantasies, the first and only face
that came to mind when I awoke, aroused and ready. Hers was the only touch I
sought when I had only my hand to please myself with.
A miraculous and chance passing on the street one day brought her physical
presence back into my life. I wanted to believe she was still the same
half-grown child I had seen her as last, but she was different now, more of a
woman, shapely and rounded in all the right places. Her clothes were simple
and poorly made, but clean and neat all the same. Her eyes had changed as
well, no longer bright and innocent, but resigned, almost leaden. They sparked
with recognition when she caught sight of me, a faint smile drawing up the
corners of her mouth. Just when I was about to lift my hat in greeting, she
scampered out of my way and hurriedly crossed the street.
I was confused and hurt by her avoidance, but I changed course and followed
her anyway. Staying out of sight but not too far behind, I watched her walk, her
pace quick and her head down. Women gave her wide berth and men appraised
her with their eyes as she passed them on the street. No one seemed to take any
notice of me, too old to be a boy, but too young yet to be judged a man.
Isabella suddenly veered to the right, disappearing between two buildings. I
jogged to catch up, reaching the corner and finding an empty alley. Sure that
she had to have gone in that direction, I made my way down the dark corridor.
Navigating through various bits of refuse and debris, I found myself in
unfamiliar surroundings. Though I knew parts of London could be seedy and
dangerous, I had never before been exposed to them. Out of the darkness, a
hand grabbed my wrist.
At every opportunity, I walked the streets of London, seeking out the most
unsavory areas in hopes of finding Isabella. I returned home every night, filthy,
tired and on several occasions, robbed of my pocket money.
More time passed and I despaired of ever seeing her again. For all I knew, she
could have already died, as illness and disease ran rampant through the city
tenements. And if she met her death there, she'd be buried in an unmarked
pauper's grave just like her mother.
The winter months were bitterly cold, and I prayed most fervently that Isabella
had such simple luxuries as a warm hearth and a dry place to lay her head, no
matter what she had to do to obtain them.
The first of February dawned wet and dreary, the English winter seemingly
dragging on forever as it did every year. An epidemic of influenza spread
across Europe, and England was not immune from its deadly touch. The Great
War continued on another year, the frequent sounding of the air raid sirens
reminding us that death could come in many forms.
I was still too young to officially join the leagues of men in uniform, but I often
felt the call to serve my country battling with the desire to find Isabella. Many
of my acquaintances, I must call them that as I really had no friends, had
already been dispatched to serve His Majesty at the far corners of the British
Empire. From Persia, to Egypt, the trenches of France and the Italian
countryside, British soldiers defended our interests against the Kaiser and his
German forces. They boarded ships at Dover, where I had often spent summers
on holiday with my parents, and went to face the enemy. Standing against
machine gun fire, gas attacks, and the many horrors of life in the trenches, the
armies of England were slowly regaining lost ground.
Finally, an orderly took pity on me and offered to search the wards, for a price
of course.
I waited an hour or more, simultaneously hoping that Isabella would be found
and dreading that she may be terribly ill. The orderly reappeared, motioning for
me to follow him. The hospital floor was packed with patients, staff running to
and fro, and the lingering smell of death permeated the air. I removed my
handkerchief from my breast pocket and covered my mouth in an attempt to
keep myself from retching.
The orderly continued on, down a hall and into a second, overflowing ward. A
tall, blonde-haired doctor was leaning over a cot, examining a patient in the far
corner of the crowded room, and that was the direction in which I was led.
As soon as we were within a few feet of the cot, I knew it was Isabella lying
there. The hand which I had held on every available occasion hung down
limply, the pale flesh of her arm marked with tell tale pink and purple
splotches.
Hearing our approach, the doctor swung around to face us. "What are you
doing here? Visitors are not permitted. Do you want to become infected
yourself?" he questioned angrily.
I ignored him, pushing past his outstretched arm and kneeling beside Isabella's
prone form. Her usually reddened cheeks held a deathly pallor, the circles
under her eyes dark and pronounced.
"Are you responsible for this girl?" he asked.
Looking at her like this, I could hardly tell she was alive. Her skin was clammy
and hot to the touch, her breaths shallow and raspy. The groans and hacking
coughs of the other patients echoed around the room. The faint weeping of
children and moans of those about to die made me wish I could do something
to help them all, but there were so many...
An hour passed in which Isabella barely stirred beyond the fluttering of an
eyelash. Afraid to speak in case I disturbed her, I simply held her hand in
between my own, gently rubbing her knuckles and massaging her palm with
my thumbs. I felt the strange prick of tears in the corner of my eyes, a feeling I
hadn't had since I was a small boy. Willing them away, a dry, stuttered sob
escaped me instead. Isabella's hand jerked in mine, her lips pursed and her eyes
cracked open. She attempted to speak, but her gasps became a hacking cough.
"Shhh, I'm going to make it better. I'm going to make it all go away, Bella."
Finally, several orderlies approached and I moved out of the way to allow them
space to remove her. I followed them up to the top floor, where they installed
her in a small but pristine room.
Though I was unable to see her, I was constantly reassured that her condition
was improving and she had not contracted pneumonia, which was often the
death knell for flu sufferers.
On the twelfth day, the head nurse informed me that Isabella would be
discharged within the week. Hearing that news, I was overjoyed to say the
least, but it also meant I had important plans to make. Isabella could not be
allowed to go back to a life lived amongst ruffians on the streets of London.
This time, I would refuse to take no for an answer, or permit her to shock me
into silence and fear. I loved her and wanted to care for her, and she would just
have to accept it. In my heart of hearts, I hoped that she would be able to love
10
On the day she was set to be released, I waited anxiously on the hospital steps
for her to come into sight. Because I knew that she would be unable to travel
comfortably by foot, I "borrowed" my father's car. If anything could be said to
be second in my heart to Isabella, it was that car. A white, Rolls-Royce Silver
Ghost, my father had acquired it brand new in 1911. It was a rare occasion
indeed that it was used for motoring, and when it was, every head turned. He
had never said I couldn't drive it, so I decided to take that as tacit approval,
besides, the wide back seat allotted quite a bit of room for Isabella to relax and
lie down on the way to her rooms.
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Arriving home, I found the house silent as a grave. There were no maids
rushing back and forth, no places set for the evening meal. My footsteps
echoed loudly down the front hall, and I grew more concerned the farther I
went without seeing anyone. When I reached my father's study, I pushed open
the door, fully expecting to see him ensconced behind his massive desk as was
normal. Instead, I was greeted with the sight of Alistair Davies, my father's
friend and barrister.
"Edward, come in and sit down, please. I'm afraid I have some bad news to
impart."
I crossed the room and settled into one of the stately, old wingback chairs,
crossed my legs and gripped the wooden armrests.
"Your parents fell ill a few days ago while visiting their country estate. I'm
sorry, there's nothing that could be done. They were both gone before dawn
today."
13
He leaned back in his seat and folded his hands across his bloated belly,
awaiting my reply. My voice was stuck in my throat and my hands shook. I
simply could not and would not discuss the transfer of assets and property like
my parents hadn't just passed on so completely unexpectedly.
"With all due respect, Sir, you can't possibly expect me to make sound
decisions right this moment!"
"Of course not, that's why I'm here, to protect your interests and make sure you
aren't taken advantage of. I assume you have no idea how to run a household,
am I right?"
I nodded in agreement.
"Just as I thought. Your father already made his wishes known that he expected
me to see to your well being in the event that he died before you reached the
age of majority, and I plan to see that to fruition. Your family hasn't held their
standing this long without hard work and good luck. It would be a shame to see
anything come to pass that would put that in jeopardy. Don't you agree?"
I nodded again, understanding that his reasoning was sound and in my best
interest.
"I think this is all I can handle this evening. If you wouldn't mind, may we
schedule any further discussions for a later date?" I inquired.
14
The majority of the next few days I spent by Isabella's bedside. She slept most
of time, but when she was awake I attempted to shove as much nourishment
into her as possible. I didn't tell her about my parent's deaths or their
subsequent funeral. I attended, and was glad to find that it was understated and
without great fanfare. Over the last few years, death had become so
commonplace, even among the upper classes, that funerals failed to hold as
much entertainment value as they once had.
By staying out most of the day, I successfully avoided any more social calls
from Mr. Davies, though he left his card on several occasions to show that he
had come calling on me. The servants avoided me, skittering down hallways to
15
One day in late April, it was unseasonably warm and dry. We ventured out to
the gardens together and strolled slowly so as not to wear Isabella out
prematurely. I cradled her arm in my own and she leaned on my shoulder for
support. The light but chilled breeze ruffled her loose, wavy hair and she drew
her wrap closer for warmth. I halted our walk and gathered her up into my
arms, rubbing her shoulders vigorously to produce heat.
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She turned from me and walked several feet down the path, clutching her wrap
tightly at her elbows.
"You'll regret this; that's what I'm afraid of," she responded, looking back at me
over her shoulder.
"The only thing I regret is the time we've wasted. You could have easily died
and kept us from ever being together. I don't want to take that chance anymore.
But enough of what I want, tell me what it is that you want."
Her head hung and her fingers fidgeted nervously in the ends of her hair. "I
would like nothing more than to be your wife," she raised her eyes to mine, "in
this world and the next."
I didn't let her go on. Instead, I raced forward and scooped her in my arms,
spinning her in a circle and whooping loudly. She giggled in a way I hadn't
heard in quite awhile and threw her arms around my neck, her hair falling
down and covering our faces, hiding our fervent kisses from view.
Though I could have gone on kissing her all day, I could tell that she was
reaching the point of exhaustion. Eventually, I persuaded her to go back to her
rooms to eat and rest. I promised her I would return in the morning with a plan
in place for our marriage.
18
Her simple, white gown skirted her ankles and gathered quite fetchingly at her
small waist. I wore my best suit, which hadn't seen the light of day in ages, and
polished my shoes until they shone. We stopped first to have our wedding
photo taken, and then went straight on in the Rolls Royce to have the ceremony
performed. It was very quick, just a short exchange of words and promises, but
it meant so much to look into each other's eyes and say them. Mrs. Cope wept
quietly into her handkerchief and leaned on her daughter's shoulder. We
returned them to their home directly after the ceremony and picked up
Isabella's few belongings before driving back to my home; our home now.
Hurriedly leaping out of the car, I ran around to the passenger side and plucked
Isabella out, scooping her into my arms and carrying her up the pathway and
into the house. I brushed past the housekeeper, a cranky, middle-aged woman
known as Mrs. Clearwater, and continued toward the main staircase. I could
hear her muttering noisily behind me, but introductions to the staff could wait.
I bounded up the stairs with Isabella giggling cheerily in my arms. I didn't
break stride until I reached the door of my room, jabbing it with my elbow
19
Isabella made the first move to deepen the kiss, licking my bottom lip with her
tongue and pulling my face closer to hers. I was quite willing to let her lead.
Though it pained me to think on it, I knew she was far superior to me as far as
experience went. However, she surprised me when she stopped abruptly.
"Edward?" she whispered.
"Hmm?" I had attached my mouth to her throat when she had moved in order
to speak.
"Do you think you could retrieve my bags from the car? I need to change."
I nodded into her neck and tried to wriggle from the bed. "I'll be right back."
Rushing back down to the car, I yanked her bags from the back seat and raced
back to the room, taking the steps two at a time. I burst through the door and
switched it locked behind me, and then turned around to see Isabella sitting
demurely on the side of the bed.
"Your things, Lady Masen." I bowed at the waist and held out her bags,
grinning facetiously.
Her head cocked to the side and she stifled another round of giggles behind her
hand. "Why thank you, kind sir. I must see to my toilette."
She rose and took her bags, stopping to look at me questioningly.
20
While I pondered, the door opened slightly and Isabella peeked out. "What are
you doing?" she asked.
I shrugged.
"Get into bed. I'll be out in just a moment."
I suppose that was the answer to my question.
Nervously, I pulled off my clothes, all but my combinations, and slid the sheets
back. When I was a boy, the bed seemed absolutely massive, easy to hide in
and impossible to accidentally roll out of. Now that I was over six feet tall, it
didn't look quite as big, but there was still more than enough room for Bella
and I, and little chance that we'd roll out.
I sat propped against the headboard, anxiously awaiting Bella's return. My left
leg shook a bit and my fingers tugged ruthlessly through my windblown hair.
Finally, I heard the door creak open and Bella emerged. She had changed into a
floor length ivory nightgown that had straps instead of sleeves, leaving her pale
arms bare. I could hardly stand the sight of her exposed flesh, as it seemed to
incite a riot of sensations inside my own body. My faced flushed and my toes
went cold, my knees shook and I could feel sweat gathering on my brow. She
drew closer, her lips twitching and trying to form a smile. When she reached
the foot of the bed, she pulled up her nightgown, freeing her legs, and boosted
herself up onto the mattress. She edged up slowly, her eyes never leaving mine.
Grasping the sheets in her left hand, she yanked them down, revealing my
lower limbs. Her hands traced my ankles and slid up to my knees, before
diving down to grip my hips. She pulled and I sank down until I was flat
against the mattress.
21
I started tugging her nightgown off at the same time she decided to start
yanking open the buttons on my combinations, resulting in both of us being
tangled messes and we had to stop and laugh while we sorted ourselves out. Of
course, as soon as we had gotten all of our remaining clothing removed, things
got quite serious again.
I wrapped her in my arms, pulling her as close to me as possible before I began
kissing up and down her neck and jaw. She went back to rotating her hips, but
the delicious friction was no longer aided by material between us. Instead, she
slipped and slid over the head of my cock, causing me to tense with
anticipation on each pass.
With one hand on her neck, I forced my lips onto hers, and with my other hand,
I gripped her backside, halting her motions just long enough to situate myself
and thrust gently inside of her. She smiled against my mouth, nipping my lips
with her teeth and sighing.
Being inside of her was like nothing I had ever felt before. The warmth, the
heat, the closeness of our bodies was liberating, yet at the same time it was
deliciously constricting. She sat up, and I could see everything. My eyes went
wide as I tried to take it all in. Her face flushed with passion, her skin naked
and wet with perspiration, her breasts full and supple, and the place where we
were joined, my cock hard and throbbing. I watched as it disappeared inside of
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"I've never seen you look more handsome than you did just now," she
whispered. "Your skin is glowing, your hair is a major catastrophe, and you
look happier than I've ever known you to be."
"I am. Well, except for the day you agreed to be my wife. I couldn't possibly be
more happy than I am right now."
Rolling on to my side, I nudged her chin up so I could reach her lips and kiss
her some more. I knew there would never come a day when I would ever tire of
having her lips brushing against my own. She took my hand and first placed it
on her breast, encouraging me to touch and squeeze, before guiding it down to
the apex of her thighs. Together, our fingers explored her heated flesh. I
diligently followed her lead, watching her face in order to find out what
pleased her most. By this time, I was hard again. Her thigh rubbed my cock
continuously while I did my best to delight her with my hand. Our kisses grew
more heated, and I could see that she was teetering on the brink of orgasm. Her
whispered pleas and pants were becoming more desperate, her rotating hips
and glistening fingers more insistent in their movements. Abandoning her lips,
I peppered her breasts with kisses and lapped at her nipples with my tongue.
Her pants turned to moans with each bit of attention I gave her breasts, so I
took her nipple into my mouth and sucked it, swirling my tongue and enjoying
the taste of her soft skin in my mouth. She writhed harder against our
commingled fingers and threw her leg over mine, bringing us closer still. My
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I bolted upright in the chair, almost toppling Isabella to the ground with my
sudden movement. "Mr. Davies, how good of you to stop by this evening," I
greeted him with false enthusiasm.
He seethed; his lumbering body vibrating with barely disguised disgust and
anger.
"Lord Masen, it seems you didn't take my warnings to heart and have let this
lovely wench rob you of your sanity. I believe your recently deceased parents
are rolling over in their graves at what you have allowed to enter their home.
Do you realize what you've done? The position you've put yourself in? The
disgrace you've put on your family name?"
He kept sputtering out insults, rubbing his hands together and shaking. I was
momentarily stunned into silence, angry replies trying to make their way out of
my frozen vocal chords. Isabella pitched herself off my lap and fled the room,
bursting into tears as she passed Mr. Davies at the door.
"I'm afraid that if your only goal tonight was to insult my wife, I'm going to
have to ask you to leave, Sir," I finally answered.
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Upon my return, I found Bella still sleeping soundly, so I took the time to write
out a long, torturous letter, detailing my decision and reasoning, and then the
many things I wanted her to know that I loved about her and how I would
return to her a redeemed man.
That night, I made love to her like I was crazed, with a feverish intensity that
surprised her. Once, twice, thrice; it would never be enough, but she had to
know how much I loved and wanted her, how much her mind and body called
to me.
By dawn I had exhausted her, and while she slept, I gathered the few
belongings I would take with me. On the pillow beside her, I left the letter and
the white feather; the symbol of my cowardice.
Mrs. Cope's daughter arrived just as I was about to leave, and with her I left the
other letter I had prepared; a will to place in the hand's of Mr. Davies, directing
that all of my property and assets were to go to my wife, who I loved above all
things, in the event of my death.
The British military was nothing if not capable. I was trained, equipped and
shipped out with preternatural speed, and found my place in the Third Army
just in time to see my first action at the Second Battle of the Somme. Sir Julian
Byng was the general in charge, and I was attached to him as a glorified errand
boy, too educated and well bred to be sent to the front lines, but not
27
Many times I had started writing her letters, but I always ended up shredding
them. I knew it was quite likely that she was very upset with me for leaving her
the way that I did, but I also knew if I had explained it to her face, I would
never have gotten out of the door. Sometimes I wondered if she would even
still be waiting there for me when I finally got home.
The Allied counter-offensive lasted for weeks, beginning in late August and
keeping us constantly on the move. The noise of the battles was deafening, the
constant specter of death or dismemberment disheartening, but we were finally
making progress. Pushing the Germans back was becoming easier now that we
had an infusion of fresh bodies, thanks to the Americans. Though they had
been not-so-secretly aiding the Allied cause for several years, the additional
manpower was really the key to achieving victory.
28
I burned.
The pain was indescribable, as if a blowlamp was being held steady on my skin
and down my throat at the same time. I could feel myself heaving everything
out of my stomach over and over, but my eyes were stuck shut and I wandered
in a daze of blindness, tripping and falling repeatedly. I could feel the screams
ripping out of me, but they still seemed inadequate in expressing my pain and
horror.
I don't know how long I went on like that. The noise of the battle disappeared
at some point and it was quite possible that darkness had fallen, but I had only
the lack of light filtering through my stuck fast eyelids to tell me so. My skin
was seared worse than it had ever been, far worse than any sunburn could do.
I drifted into blessed unconsciousness, but the pain broke through, continuing
to torture me.
Sometime, whether it was hours or days later, someone touched me, picked me
up, and threw me over their shoulder. The sting of the touch sent me back into
a tailspin of screaming lungs and flailing limbs before I passed out again.
Time moved on, but I was stuck in a hell on Earth that I had never imagined
could have existed. Burning flames of pain coursed through me at all times, my
lungs failed me, my limbs seemed like nothing but charred remnants. I only
thought of the pain, I only saw the darkness; I had no other thoughts or
feelings.
29
Marcus helped me stumble through this new existence. I knew my name was
Edward, and that I had been a British soldier, but I remembered little else. My
body was slow to recover; every step was full of pain and confusion.
Marcus told me that the war was over, that I could go home, but I didn't know
where home was anymore and I felt a lingering sense of duty to him. He had
helped me when I was untouchable, defenseless and needy like a newborn
babe. I stayed with him, doing little things that his aged and decrepit body no
longer allowed, and because he offered a quiet companionship when I had no
one else.
And then, one day, he left me. He died sometime in the night, as quietly as he
had lived. I was unsure what to do with myself. It seemed wrong to stay on in a
house that wasn't mine, but I was afraid to leave as well.
That night while I slept, I dreamt of brown eyes and brown hair, splayed so
beautifully across pristine white sheets, of feminine curves and naked flesh,
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