Professional Documents
Culture Documents
LEADER’S PREPARATION
• Read chapter 6 of Teaching Your Children Healthy Sexuality before the session. As you do, highlight ideas, quotes
or comments that you would like to explore in the group setting.
SUPPLIES
• Television and DVD player
• Prior to the session, make sure that each participant (or couple) in the group has a copy of Teaching Your Children
Healthy Sexuality.
• Print enough copies of the Participant’s Guide Session #5 from the CD-Rom to distribute to each participant at the
beginning of the session.
• Enough white sheets of paper for each participant
• A large box or crayons
• Enough pens or pencils for each participant to use
LEADER’S NOTES
As we mentioned in the last session’s leader’s notes, during this session you will be exploring the issue of sexual abuse. As
a reminder, while this session is designed with young people as the focal point, undoubtedly issues from the past will arise
for participants as well. Be ready to hear some stories and do your best to help participants walk through their own hurt and
pain. Once again, be very sensitive to the balance between “getting through the material” and doing the more pressing work
of ministering to the lives of the people in your group.
In this activity, each team will create a list of items they have in common with each other when it comes to parenting. Give
teams 5 minutes to come up with their lists.
When the 5 minutes are up, have each team read their lists to the rest of the group. The team with the most items wins.
CHECK IN
Have participants pair up with a partner from their small group last week and take a few minutes to share with each other
what happened regarding their plan to discuss the consequences of sexual activity outside of marriage with their children.
Invite the group to gather back together and ask the following questions:
1. Now that we’ve been together for four sessions, what is one main thing you have learned from our reading and
discussions together?
2. How has our time together changed the way you parent? How have these sessions changed your relationship with
your child?
2. Getting Started:
Introduce the session by saying that we’ll be exploring the issue of sexual abuse: bringing hope and seeking prevention.
Hand out a white sheet of paper to each participant and set out the large box of crayons. Have each participant take a
moment to draw images or symbols of their feelings when they think of the phrase “sexual abuse.” Remind participants that
there is no right or wrong here, you just want them to express their feelings visually. (Be aware that in this kind of exercise,
feelings of hurt and anger over the past may emerge in some of the drawings that participants create.) After everyone has
finished their drawing, ask several people to share what they drew and what it represents for them. Not everyone will feel
comfortable sharing what they drew and why, so be sure to allow people the freedom not to share what they’ve drawn.
Introduce the video segment, letting participants know that this week you’ll be discussing the issue of sexual abuse. In the
video, Jim will be discussing the importance of reaching out with love and hope to those who have been sexually abused, as
well as bringing hope to anyone in your group who may have been sexually abused in the past.
4. Going Deeper:
LEADER’S NOTE
This might be a good time to let participants know what the phone number is for Child Protective Services in your
particular area. You might also want to have a phone number for a professional Christian counselor who is trained in dealing
with adolescent sexual abuse.
4. Knowing what to do if we suspect that our child has been sexually abused is obviously a skill we need to have as
parents. But preventing sexual abuse is just as valuable. Let’s take a few minutes to brainstorm a list of as many
ideas as possible for how we can help prevent our kids from becoming victims of sexual abuse.
LEADER’S NOTE
Allow participants to respond. Encourage them to write the group’s ideas down in their Participant Guide. If participants
mention ways that Jim included in the book, (“It’s okay to say no.” “If in doubt, stay away.” “Develop a ‘report in’ policy”),
that’s great! If they don’t, go ahead and add these to your group’s list.
LEADER’S NOTE
This section has been created in an effort to have participants interact with what the Scriptures have to say in regards to
this session’s topic. Depending on the amount of time you have for this section, you can choose between either having the
entire group read through the passage and discussing the questions, or forming smaller groups of 4 to 6 people to foster
relationship-building and greater participation in discussion.
6. So What?
Have participants get into groups of three or four. Have each group read the Kaitlyn story in their Participant’s Guide. Have
each subgroup work through the questions found on the handout:
1. If you were Kaitlyn’s mom, what would you say to her?
2. Do you feel that Kaitlyn has been sexually abused? Why or why not?
3. What action, if any, would you take in this situation?
Prompt everyone to gather back together as a group. Invite participants to briefly share their responses to the Kaitlyn
handout.
Ask participants take a few moments to answer the question under the So What heading on their Participant Guides:
What is one action step you want to take in the coming days to either prevent or deal with issues of sexual abuse with your
children?
Practical Action Step Ideas (Samples to help participants think through what they might write.)
• Have an age-appropriate discussion with my kids about what sexual abuse means.
• Ask kids from time to time about whether they have felt they have been sexually abused.
• Take a more thorough approach to investigating backgrounds of babysitters.
Close your time together by spending few moments in corporate prayer. Allow participants the freedom to pray about
whatever they wish, either out loud or in private. Close the prayer time by asking God to give participants strength and
peace to know how to go about talking with their children about the issue of sexual abuse.
Encourage participants to read chapter 7, “Dealing with Your Own Sexuality,” in preparation for the next session. Also,
encourage each participant to bring an object with them to the next session which represents the vision of a healthy sexuality
that they have for their children.
YOUNGER CHILDREN
• Bed-wetting
• Sleep disturbances
• Nightmares
• Lack of appetite
• Clinging with a fear of being left alone or with someone they have been alone with
• Depression
• Sexually acting out or sex play with dolls or toys
• Drawing naked pictures
• Acting seductively
• Acts of sexual aggression
OLDER CHILDREN
• Learning problems in school
• Poor peer relationships
• Self-destructive behavior, suicidal, medicating their pain with drug and alcohol abuse
• Nervous, aggressive, disruptive, destructive behavior (perhaps acting out their hurt to secure attention)
• Running away
• Seductive and promiscuous behavior
• Shutting down sexually and emotionally
• Lack of trust and hostility toward authority figures
• Fear of going home, fear of being left alone with the abuser
• Severe depression
• Pain, itching, bleeding, bruises in the genital area
• Extremely low self-esteem