Quarterly Newsletter Volume 8

October 2015

Emmaus House
Cap Haitien, Haiti

LEARNING TO LOVE (AND BE LOVED)

Two years after its beginning, Emmaus House has been more of a
success than any of us dreamed. Many Haitians and Americans
who work in Haiti told us that our standards were too high and the
youth simply would not comply. We can honestly say that this
group of young people has grown far beyond what we imagined
and they are completely different people than they were upon arrival at Emmaus House.

abandonment or death. The young adult years are when one decides how they will perceive that loss and how it will affect the rest
of their lives. This time of life is critical to processing the traumas
endured in childhood and how the challenges that lie there will
define who they are to become. This is when one chooses to
overcome or to succumb to the anger and pain. All of our young
people have been and are very much living in the emotional turmoil of that reality. Most are choosing to overcome, however
However, not every young person entering our program has been some are choosing to succumb.
successful. It is important to highlight our obvious successes,
however, it is also important not to downplay what could be per- Overcoming this anger and pain requires something very specific
ceived as failures. Our staff and board works hard to make sure and seemingly simple. It requires learning to give and receive
that if our youth work the program, there is hope for their future. love, a sometimes insurmountable task when, as a child, one has
However, they have to put a great deal of physical, spiritual, and rarely felt safe and cared for, only learning the skills of survival.
emotional work into that program. There have been several young Without learning to trust authority to care for you, it is difficult for a
people who have chosen not to work the program and who have child to learn to receive love, much less give it.
voluntarily left or have been
dismissed.
These young Our brains have done a majority of their growing by the tender
people remain heavy in our age of 3, during that time children are learning if their world is safe
hearts and prayers and their or if they need to learn to survive on their own without the help of a
futures weigh on all of us loving caretaker (most of our youth came to live at Cap Haitien
Childrens Home after the age of 3.) God designed us to be loved
every day.
and cared for. Even an infant understands that if they are not
In order to understand the properly cared for, they will die, hence the blood curdling scream
depth of our successes as every mother endures when feeding time rolls around. When a
well as our perceived fail- child learns not to trust they will be cared for, they build up defensures, one must understand es such as aggression, controlling behaviors, manipulation, lack of
that all of our youth have trust, and severe independence. They learn to protect themselves
endured
a
tremendous from people and love. They dont trust anyone, they rely only on
amount of emotional trauma themselves to get their needs met. Their brains become proover the course of their grammed for alert, constantly deciding between fight or flight.
young lives. Studies have When a child is focused on survival and not learning, it is difficult
shown the most traumatic to process simple cause and effect. They truly cannot reasonably
event a person can endure in process the consequences of their actions. Think about when you
childhood is the loss of a are extremely hungryits difficult to concentrate on anything else.
parent. All of our youth have Your survival instinct kicks in and your world becomes consumed
lost one or both parents to with the thought of your next meal. Once you eat, you are once

Studies have
shown the most
traumatic event a
person can endure
in childhood is the
loss of a parent. All
of our youth have
lost one or both
parents to abandonment or death.

www.emmaushousehaiti.org

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again able to concentrate. For many of our youth, they have

been in survival mode so long, learning to trust others is extremely difficult; they simply stay in survival mode. Therefore, simple
rational thought processes such as cause and effect dont come
easy to them.

heart breaking dismissal from the house.

The outcome for this young lady has been similar to what we
predicted for all of our youth had Emmaus House not existed.
She has no real home, she has turned away everyone who has
tried to love her, and she is now pregnant with nowhere to go.
Emmaus House was set up using the family model created by Although she cannot live in the house due to her maladaptive
God. Participating in a family requires allowing and trusting behavior, we are still doing what we can to help her survive and
someone to love and to provide for you. It requires trusting they offer the love that she will need in order to find real peace.
will keep you safe. The intimacy and love created by that model
can be threatening and sometimes scary for our youth. The idea God gives us the love of a family when we are young to introduce
of trusting another person to meet their physical and emotional us to His love for us. The only thing that will ultimately save our
needs is scary when most bonds made with adults throughout youth or any one of us is the love of God. None of us will find
their lives have ended in hurt. When a person encounters fear, peace if we dont ultimately trust in Gods love for us. Nothing
the fight or flight instinct kicks in and they sometimes develop can separate us from His love (Romans 8:35-39.) Until we can
maladaptive behaviors making it impossible to live in a family unit all learn to trust His love, true healing will never take place.

such as Emmaus House. As strange as it sounds, that love actuAll of us at Emmaus House are working hard to help all of our
ally pushes them away rather than brings them closer.
youth succeed. Jonathan, Vivian, Gerome, and the Kittrells are
I have had many discussions with our house parents, Jonathan an excellent example on the ground of unconditional love for
and Vivian, educating them on a professional level regarding this these young people. However, many our youth need critical therdynamic. They are on the front lines of this battle for these young apy during these young adult years to work through these deep
peoples hearts. I encourage them to continue to be patient, to issues if they are going to successfully learn to love and be loved
show love, to make them feel safe yet still hold them accounta- in a healthy way. Childrens homes in America usually offer indiblea difficult balance to find. Raising two children who have vidual and group therapy for their residents on a weekly basis.
suffered early childhood trauma myself, I am all too familiar with We are working to offer more tools to help them on their journey
the challenges Jonathan and Vivian face. It hurts to give so to heal. Helping our boys in working through these issues is a
much love and get very psychologist, Roni Bhullar, who lives and works near Cap Hailittle in return and the task tian. He has graciously volunteered to come and work with our
seems overwhelming at young men in a weekly group therapy session. Progress is slow,
times. Their job is a battle but it has been helpful. There is a highly qualified Haitian woman
to be sure. However, our in Cap Haitian who is available to work with our girls, howevyoung people will never er, Emmaus House lacks the funds to pay for her services.
heal if they dont feel safe. For the 5 girls living in the house, the cost would be $200/
Most of our youth over the month (a very reasonable fee by American standards.) Overlast 2 years or so have all, we have seen a great need for therapy for our girls as they
learned to, maybe not em- seem to have a more difficult time finding stability and accepting
brace, but accept the fact that Jonathan and Vivian are going to love.

As strange as it

sounds, that love actually pushes them

away rather than
brings them closer.

love them regardless of their bad behavior.

simply find this love too threatening.

Some, however,

If God has put it on your heart to help our young women in this
way, please email Emmaus House, or me at:
tanya_pirtle@comcast.net. We dont want to see any more leave
I think of a time when one of our girls, who has since been dis- our program without first reaching their goals.
missed, was being challenged regarding her poor behavior by the
rest of the group. As the girl sobbed, not knowing how to fix it,
Vivian hugged her tightly telling her she loved her. Despite the
abuse this young lady brought upon Vivian during her stay at
Emmaus House, Vivian still expressed her unconditional love for
her; exactly what this young lady needed to heal. However, for
her, accepting this love, letting go and allowing herself to feel
safe goes against all the survival skills she has been using to get
by. In order for her to heal and accept this love, she would have
to let go of her control, manipulation, and aggressions. The very
behaviors she sees as self-preserving, were actually the behaviors destroying her. Trusting that another person will love you is
too much, its too hard, its too much work to process the pain of
her abandonment and loss. And much to her demise, she continues in her self-destructive behaviors which eventually led to her

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www.emmaushousehaiti.org

WHAT ARE THEY UP TO NOW?

By Jillian Kittrell

Merly recently moved to southern Haiti

where she is now attending a university
and studying Physical Therapy. She is
very busy with classes, but is working
hard and has impressed her professors
and school administration. We are looking forward to spending Christmas with
her.

In September Willey started his professional training in cruise ship hospitality. Willey has taken a leading role in
his class and is often asked to assist his
teachers. Since starting school Willey
has made level 4 every week in the
house.

Andy will complete driving school this

month in Cap Haitien. After receiving his
license he will be eligible to apply for a
professional school in Port au Prince
where he will learn to operate large
machinery. As construction continues,
Andys goal is to help build and improve
Haiti.

Lobe is in his final year of secondary

school. He is currently studying for the
TOEFL exam and will soon begin applying
for universities in America where he
would like to study Radiology. Lobe is in
need of partial support for his education.
If interested, please contact Tanya
Pirtle for more details.

Djooly recently graduated from secondary school. After working with multiple
medical teams, his goal is to study Health
Care Administration and help improve
hospitals in Haiti. Djooly is currently applying for schools in Arkansas. In the
meantime he is tutoring the Kittrell kids,
translating for local organizations, and
helping around Emmaus House.
Jetro is also in his final year of secondary school and prepping to apply for
universities in America. He dreams of
studying Psychology and wants to use
his education to motivate and educate
Haiti. He also needs partial support for
his education. If interested, please contact Tanya Pirtle

Kencia is currently attending a nursing

school in Cap Haitien and will apply for
the only midwifery school in Haiti for Fall
of 2016. Kencia is currently in need of a
gently used laptop for school. Please contact Jillian Kittrell if you are willing to
donate one.

Jenny is currently in her final year of

secondary school. Following graduation
next summer, she would like to attend
nursing school in Cap Haitien to becoming a Pediatric Nurse. Jenny will be in
need of financial support for nursing
school beginning the summer of 2016.

If you or someone you know are interested in financially supporting any of these youth still in need to pursue their career
please contact Jillian Kittrell at kittrellsinhaiti@gmail.com . Please help us reach out to individual donors and/or take this
cause to your congregation so this important work can continue.

www.emmaushousehaiti.org

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MEET FREDO
Newest arrival to Emmaus
House from the CHCH
Age: 18 years old

Emmaus House
Contact Info:
PO Box 35001
Westminster, CO 80035

Education: 7th grade

Career Goal: Wants to be a
preacher!

www.emmaushousehaiti.org
kittrellsinhaiti@gmail.com

Already one month away

from earning *honors level,!

Go to our website for

shipping instructions.

*Which means we will be looking for $50 more per month to

meet this need.
Sponsorship is a valuable tool for our youth, however, as you might guess, Emmaus House also pro-

vides housing, utilities, fuel, directors and mentors to provide guidance, etc. required to provide a
safe, comfortable living environment. Currently we are also seeking ongoing support to meet those

Search for:
Emmaus House

needs so we can keep the individual youth sponsorship levels at a reasonable level. Please help us

Make a Donation
Online:

Recurring payments
WWW.ETSY.COM/SHOP/EMMAUSWORKSHAITI

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