The first semester of my freshman year has brought many lessons, which can be summed

up in a single phrase. The phrase is short, but I think it does all that I have learned justice. I have
accrued a lot of knowledge throughout this semester; I think there is something new to learn each
day. Over time, these tidbits of wisdom build into a bigger picture. Now, since the semester is
almost over, I can now see my experience with perspective. When I look over all of the
challenges, rewards, tears, and laughter of the past three months, I see one phrase: be humble, yet
confident.
John R. W. Stott, one of the most influential Christian leaders of the 20th century,
once stated Pride is your greatest enemy, humility is your greatest friend. (Tarrants). Being
humble and confident is a difficult balance; the words seem to be opposites. However, I have
struggled with both ends of the spectrum, and now I realize how important it is to possess both of
these qualities. Without confidence, I do not take risks or recognize my full potential. I am shy
and hold myself back. Without humility, I can overestimate myself and set myself up for failure,
academically and socially. If I am too humble, I am passive and do not get enough credit. It is
apparent that ones level of confidence versus humility determines much of their actions and
success. It affects so many parts of my life that I must be wise in this balance.
I often do not notice the points in my life where I do not show enough confidence. Most
of the time, this is exhibited through situations where I want to speak up, stand up for myself, or
be assertive, but I simply cannot. These moments are fleeting; they pass by so quickly that I do
not have time to remember to be confident. Sometimes, I think that it is not worth it to be
confident because there is a risk that people will be angry or annoyed.

I think that risk is present in all situations, not only social. For instance, if I am confident
that I will do well on a test, I will be especially disappointed if I do poorly. This semester has
reminded me that I do not need to be afraid of confidence, and that I am better off being secure in
myself. A lot of unneeded worry, sadness, and passive aggression is erased when one has a the
courage to speak, even when circumstances are hard. Though this bit of wisdom did not directly
result from an academic assignment, it was reflected two assignments from this semester, which
I chose as my two artifacts.
My first artifacts comes from UWRT 1103; my class was assigned a literacy narrative. I
have always been adept with English, but I was never so sure of my writing skills. Now, I see
this was a foolish insecurity, a side effect of my perfectionism. The objective of the literacy
narrative was to write a personal story about reading, writing, or literacy in another skill. I
carefully chose a fond memory and completed all of the assigned exercises in preparation. I
edited and rewrote my draft, remembering to add dialogue and sensory details. Finally, it was
complete. I was happy with the final product, but I sensed there were quite a few lingering errors.
Maybe I would receive an A, if I was lucky.
The morning our narratives were returned, my eyes bulged and my heart fluttered in my
chest. I squinted as Professor Campbell sat my paper down in my spot, as if that would shield my
eyes from the grade. I tentatively turned the last page. I saw the number 98. I was able to read the
rest of the commentary. He wanted to use my literacy narrative next year as an example!... But
why?
Obviously, I was shocked. Why was I scared that I would get a bad mark? Why was I so
sure that I had left behind multiple errors in my paper? All of the anxiety was a waste. Maybe not

all situations result in such a reward, but I could have made my life much easier if I was more
confident in my abilities. Even if I had failed, it still requires confidence to get back up and try
again. Therefore, there is no loss in being sure of oneself. This is not a lesson that I can
accomplish in one semester, much less one night; I still struggle with being secretly timid.
However, positive situations like this serve as reminders of why I should be confident.
There is a difference between confidence and pride. Pride is destructive, and often goes
hand in hand with insecurity. This may seem like an oxymoron, but pride is a coping mechanism
for self-doubt, at least it is for me: I over-inflate my abilities and ego because deep down, I feel
inadequate. In addition to boosting my confidence this semester, I have also have had to tone
down my pride by becoming more humble, as exemplified in my second artifact. I am not sure
which is a harder pill to swallow.
My honors LBST class is called "Science, Technology, and Society". Honestly, I only
signed up for it because there were not many honors LBST classes left. Now, I am glad that I am
taking it. Every week, we get assigned journal articles to read. When I think of an article, I
picture something about 2-4 pages long. This is probably more accurate of an internet news
article rather than a scientific journal article. These articles are usually 25 pages long, and we get
assigned three or more of them per week. They are a hurdle to tackle.
In addition to reading these things, we are armed with a note card and pencil every class
period to make sure we have completed the assigned readings. The first week, I did not take
notes on the articles, which was probably a manifestation of pride. I thought I could remember
approximately 100 pages worth of information. I got Cs and Bs on those note cards, to my
surprise. I thought my answers were adequate, though not lengthy. My professor approached me

one day after class and advised that I write more on the note card, because my answers were
good, just simply too short. This seemed a little excessive to me, but I decided to try his advice.
I also noticed that everyone else in the class had notes with them, something that I never
did. Though it required more of me, I took notes on the readings the next week. This made the
reading process take about twice as long. During class, I filled up the entire note card with my
answer, something I was only able to do because of my detailed notes. I continued to discipline
myself like this for the next few weeks. My note cards reached As, along with my overall class
grade.
Through this slight struggle, I have learned the art of skimming and pushing myself to
read very long articles. I am grateful that I am in that class. I was not very excited about it
initially, but I have learned valuable information regarding the culture of science, and general
paths to success and knowledge. I have also gained some humility. Perhaps I would not have
learned so much if I did not care about thoroughly reading and understanding the articles.
Looking back, I now realize that both lack of humility and confidence held me back from
achieving my full potential. Insecurity told me I was not good enough, and pride told me that I
was too good. I think these traits are human nature, and it is difficult to avoid them. I have found
that each moment is different; I am constantly growing and needing to remind myself of
confidence and humility. To me, battles such as this are what allow for the most promising
development. I invest so much will power and time in the struggle of becoming the best I can be.
As I have learned this semester, quality dedication yields good results; therefore, I am hopeful.

Works Cited

Tarrants, Thomas A., III. "Pride and Humility." C. S. Lewis Institute. C. S. Lewis Institute,
Winter 2011. Web. 06 Dec. 2015.