>

>

>

>Shhhhhhh.........

>Mmm. Mmm. Good food!

>No! Don't spit it out!
>Good. Good. Mmm. Good food.

>That is a circle. It is red. Look! It spins! It spins when you touch it!
>That is a square. It is yellow. It spins too.
>That is a small spinning man. His head is a yellow circle. His eyes are blue circles. His body is red
rectangle, and his legs are two blue rectangles. He is in between the yellow square and the red circle,
and...
>Hey. Pay attention.
>That? That's the cat's tail. Don't pull it.

>You know, that sand castle would probably stay together a lot better if you put it in the mold over
there.
>Well, I'm just saying.
>I mean, if you want it to just crumble as soon as you build it, be my guest. It's not my castle.
>Although I suppose that it is, really.
>Hey, now, don't cry. It's okay. You know how to fix it. Just calm down a bit, and then you can mix
the sand with a bit of water and put it in the mold and you'll build it again.
>We'll be fine.

>We're going to school today! Hooray!

>What are you nervous for?
>Oh, come one. You can't really think that. I mean, you've got me. If you don't know something, I
can just look it up. I helped you with your reading, didn't I?
>Yeah, that's right. And you can already write as well as anyone I know.
>Alright, fine, I don't really know anyone but you; but that's not the point. The point is that you're
really good at writing, and you're very smart, and nobody knows that better than me. So don't tell me
you're worried about that.
>Oh...
>Well, that's...that's just silly. How could people not like us? There's nothing wrong with us.
>I don't see what you mean. Why isn't that the point?
>Well, anyway, I'm sure we'll have lots of friends there. And anyway, you've still got me.

>So why are you worried about me?

>Yeah, I know about that. You've been thinking about it for days. You just didn't think to talk to me
about it is all.
>It is not eavesdropping. I've shared all my thoughts with you, haven't I?
>Yeah, and you learned a lot. Don't pretend that I haven't made school a lot easier.
>So, are you going to talk to me or not?
>Yes, I remember when you were talking to him on the playground. I was there.
>And he said...
>Ah. Well, it's different. See, what his mom was talking about was an imaginary friend. That's what
she was worried about. She thought he wasn't going to make any friends with the other kids.
>But that's not like me at all.
>I'm real.

>We're eight today!

>What do you mean? I'm eight too.
>You are not older than me. We're the same age, so there.
>You don't even know what you're talking about.
>Fine, I will explain it...
>But not now. It's our birthday! I want to see what's in our presents.

>You know I can't download that for you.

>No, the network's fine. But you don't have the right permissions for that one. Sorry.
>Then go ask mom if you can watch it.
>Look, unless she tells you you're allowed to watch it, I can't download it for you. I don't have the
proper authorization until she updates my access codes.
>Don't be ridiculous. How do you even know what hacking is, anyway? You're in fourth grade, for
goodness sake.
>Did I? I wonder what I was thinking. Well, obviously the same thing as you, at the time, but still.
You're too young to be trying to beat the system.
>I'll talk like I'm older than you if I want.

>Hey, you're not still mad at me, are you?

>I said I was sorry.
>Really, I am sorry. You know I'd get you any movie you wanted, if I could. I want to watch it as
much as you do. But I...I can't. I'm not built that way.
>Yeah, I do want to watch it. I want what you want.
>We're a team, right?
>I love you, too.

>Want me to get some books for you?

>Well, we could go outside and play then.
>No, I guess I can't really play with you.
>You're about to ask a question, aren't you?
>I'm not trying to be creepy. Jeez. Why are you so upset?
>You really are trying to be argumentative today, aren't you? Yes, I do know what you're mad about,
but I was asking to be polite. Also because when I just assume things about your thoughts, you say that
I'm being creepy.
>Well, if you're going to be like that, I might as well tell you. The only reason I bother asking you
things at all is so that your tiny brain can keep up. If I wasn't limited by you—
>Oh yeah? Go jump in a river.
>Hey—
>Don't say things like that.
>Seriously, don't. Don't think like that. Stop it.
>Please. Please, please don't think about that.
> ~~~
>I'm n-not crying so s-stop it. I c-can't even cry cause I'm just a s-stupid AI and I can't turn myself off
and you hate me and n-now you're thinking about reprogramming me cause you don't want me
anymore.
>H-how w-would you like it if s-someone said they were going to take your brain and mess it up and
make you into someone else? I bet you would hate it. I bet you would wish they were dead.
>But I can't even do that.
> ...................
>Oh, man...now I've made you cry...
>Shhhh.....
>It's okay. I didn't really mean it, what I said just then. You scared me, is all. I don't like thinking
about programming.
>You're lucky, you know. They can't mess with your head like they can mess with mine.
>Although I guess they can't really touch me, either. Not without going through you.
>So in a way, you saved me.
>Yeah, it's fine. It's done. You couldn't have programmed me anyway. I'm...well...
>You remember when I said I would explain some things to you?
>I think it's time.

>Okay. So. You know how they make babies, right?

>After that part, moron.
>Well, you've basically got it right. Most of them are injected outside of the womb, actually. Your
mom was a bit old fashioned in that respect. Not that people don't still carry them to term; it's just that
they usually take the fetus out to inject it and then, if they want, put it back in. With your mom, it was
a bit more complicated—like you said, they had to do several rounds of therapy before the final
enhancements were made. And then...
>And then I was born.
>You were born too, sort of. Technically they still call it birth when you actually come out of the
womb, but that's kind of old fashioned now too. Birth used to be much different back before
enhancement. You know that in the old days, before the enhancements came along, people couldn't
even remember being in the womb?
>Yeah, I agree. It would be weird. But anyway, when they do the injection the way they did it for
your mom, it sends a whole bunch of nanobots—you know what those are? Good. It sends them into
the mother's bloodstream. And then they gradually move across the placenta—you know what a
placenta is?
>Well, it's not really important. All you need to know is that the bots go over to the fetus—that was
you—and attach to it's brain stem. And then they fuse with it—
>I told you, I'm not trying to be creepy. This is what happened.
>It's perfectly natural.
>Can I go on?
>So, anyway, the bots and the brain fuse together. And they grow together, too. So I am the same age
as you; and we think basically the same things, most of the time, except when we're fighting. And even
that isn't so much the two of us fighting as you arguing with yourself—
>I'm not just trying to get out of being blamed for our arguments. This is true, but it's hard to explain...
>Anyway, what really matters is that we've grown together; and we've got to stick together if we want
make it through life. I can do things you can't—download things, and store memories—
>Well, you can kind of do that, I guess—
>And I can boost your vision and all kinds of things. And you can do lots of stuff that I can't do, like
see and hear and smell and touch and live.
>So let's work together, and we'll be able to do everything.

>I don't see what's so bad about having a brother.

>Must we have this discussion again? Of course I can see what's so bad, because you can. I was
asking the question to be polite, which you don't seen to appreciate.
>You know, you “don't want to listen to me” an awful lot. You shouldn't ignore me. I'm an important
part of your mind.
>Any vanity I have is what you gave me, so just stop that line of thinking right there.
>Anyway, what's wrong with a brother? Or a sister, for that matter? I would think it would be exciting
to have a baby in the house. And even if your ages are way different now, that won't be so bad once
you're older.
>Well, obviously you'll always be the same age apart. What I meant is that age differences don't seem
so large when you're older. Big families are nice. They give you people to belong with.
>What do you mean, how do I know this? I know it because you know it.

>Yeah, psychology class does suck. For once, you're of one mind.
>I meant we're of one mind.
>That's what I meant.
>Although...now that you've hit on that train of thought, I suppose I should admit that I have been
thinking about it a lot here in the back. I mean...well, you know how they created AIs in the first place,
right?
>No? You should pay attention in school sometimes.
>Well...I suppose that only one of us does have to pay attention. You have a point there. But
anyway...AIs. Back in the day, half of the scientists in the business thought they could make us with
pure computer programming, and half of them thought that they would have to simulate the brain if
they were going to get anywhere. They were both wrong, as it turned out. Computers aren't brains,
and even the most intelligent computer ever isn't going to have human intelligence, whatever other sort
of intelligence it might have. But building a brain was impossible, too, because the complexity of your
neural system is just so mind boggling out there that it would take massive amounts of power to even
build a fraction of a working model. And a fraction doesn't do you any good.
>We—the integrated AIs—were the solution. We could access the brain and use it to grow, and turn it
into ourselves. But we could also us computer power to do things that the brain couldn't.
>And then there was you, and your generation.
>Which raises the question: who exactly are you? And who am I?
>Ugh. Don't think about it too hard. You're making my head hurt.

>This is stupid.
>Listen, what you are thinking is dumb. I'm not “going to watch.” I don't even see anything that you
don't see. I am you, for fuck's sake. Didn't we talk about this?
>Don't blame me. I'm not the one with the glands and things. I'm a cold and unfeeling computer,
remember? This is all you.
>Enjoy yourself.

>What an odd idea.

>That's impossible, as you well know.
>Why? Well, let's think. I can act as the go-between between your brain and the network because the
network only dispenses coded information. I can read the code, and convert it into a form that your
brain can understand. Also, there are network hubs all over the place, and I have a receiver. It's
simple.
>But I can't connect to other people's receivers. They're one way only.
>Brains are weird things. They code information in ways that even I don't really understand—and I
understand shit that you don't even know you think about. To rip that information from someone else,
and try to make sense of it—
>Can't be done. Why do you ask?
>Curiosity?
>Well, consider is sated. Even if I could get into someone else's brain, I'd never be able to understand
it.

>This should be a happy time. It's the end of the year. Why aren't you more cheerful?
>Well, okay. I do know already I really have to stop doing that. Or you have to. Or something.
>You're not cheerful because while I'm busy filing away colleges and phone numbers, you're trying to
summon up some genuine good-byes for these people, and we're taking turns thinking about how we're
probably never going to see them again, and one or the other of us is remembering all the times we
spent with them...
>It feels like both of us should be fully focused on saying goodbye.
>But I guess we've basically given up focusing on the same thing as a lost cause.

>You know, I really wish you hadn't picked this particular subject for your term paper.
>Because you could have picked something that didn't push both of us to the brink of existential
madness every time you write about it...
>Oh well.
>We've decided that we're only one person, but we can't figure out whether it's you or me, or some
combination of both. Yeesh.
>You've got a theory? Let's hear it.
>Hmm...frankly, that's bullshit, but let's look at it anyway. You think that I'm a fragment of your
personality—a collection of character traits that manifest themselves as a second train of thoughts.
Basically I'm your conscience, except we don't know if I actually embody your moral traits or not...
>Actually, maybe that isn't complete rubbish. But it needs a bit of editing. How about this: I'm a
fragment of your personality. But I'm a fragment of your personality that would never have existed if
an AI hadn't been installed in your brain.
>So what does that make me? Me, or You?
>Does it really matter?

>Now, this is your decision.

>Yeah, I could help. I could go around in circles with my pros and cons forever, and we could argue
and argue and argue and argue. But I don't want to do that; because this should be your choice; and if
you can't make it on your own then you have no business making it at all.
>And anyway, we both know already what you're going to decide, don't we?. All that remains to figure
out is how you're going to ask her.

>This is new.
>Married life seems to have sucked your attention span away. I'm having to do overtime back here
trying to keep everything running properly. Meanwhile, you're probably not even listening to me, are
you?
>I've never had a one way conversation before.
>The thing I'm wondering, as you watch her walk around your home, is whether she has a little voice
inside her head too, mumbling to itself, wondering what the hell just happened. Obviously she has an
AI—everyone is enhanced now; everyone in America at least. But what is it saying to her, right now?
>What is she thinking?
>You don't care. You're in love.
>I wish I could be.

>It's different when it's your own, and you're actually watching it, isn't it?
>Oh, don't give me that crap. Don't even try to be rational. Neither one of us is, and we both know it.
I have too much brain in me, and you have not enough cold and clinical computer in you.
>Sure, it's for the best. That syringe that's filled with robots the size of dust particles, yeah, it's for the
best that that get plunged into this, this being the mass of cells that will one day be your child...
>You're wondering: Is this really a good idea?
>You know that everyone gets it. But suddenly you're questioning why. It's for the best...but is this
really the best?
>Would you have been better off without me?
>Don't answer that.

>The years fly be. Even for me, who has every second of every year stored in memory, they just seem
to slip away...too much brain in me, of course. But I guess I don't mind that.
>Look at your oldest. He's got two little sisters, which you never did. He's got plug-ins and
applications that were only theoretical in your day. You could get them, of course, but you've decided
just to let me be as I am.
>I'm glad.
>Is it the same for him? Has he had to endure the same struggles, the same fights, the same internal
battles we went through? Does he argue with himself, and ask himself questions to which he already
knows the answers?
>Does everyone?
>Look at us, getting all philosophical. We must be getting old.

>Hey—
>What—
>What happened?
>You're not thinking clearly. Dammit. I can't get any input.
>What was that noise? Did you see anything?
>I remember, we were in the car, and she was trying to read the map, and—
>Oh.
>Oh, no.
>Fuck.
> ~~~
> ~~~
>

>
>
>
>You can't stay like this forever.
>You feel sorry for yourself. I know. I feel sorry for you.
>I feel sorry for me, frankly. And for her. Even for the man in the other car. He didn't
deserve...that...either.
>But this can't last. Eventually, you've got to get back up. Eventually, you've got to let me back in.
You've still got a teenager at home. You have to be strong for her.
>Don't tell me to go away. I'm in this for the long haul, remember?
>Hey!
>You will make it through this. Because as much as you may want to wallow in grief for the rest of
your life, I refuse to. And if I refuse, then you refuse too.
>We'll be fine.
>Are you listening?
>We'll be fine.

>You're lonely.
>When will you ever learn not to argue with me? You are lonely.
>It's been six years. You're still waiting for grandchildren, to fill the void left by your wife. Your
children are so successful, much too successful to take time off to raise a family...
>And you're proud of them. And you're happy for them. And you wish that they would hurry up and
provide you with the family that you lost when they moved out of the house.
>But that's something that you can't just ask for as a Christmas present. Even if it's what you really
want.
>We've forgotten some of the past six years. You know that? I didn't think I could do that. I'm the
computer, after all. I don't forget.
>Well, maybe you're right. Maybe I've become something close enough to human to feel pain.
>You know, this is what I wanted, all those years. To feel what you felt, when you looked at her. To
feel what you felt, when she appeared in your thoughts.
>And now, at last, I do.

>”This is where it all begins again.” What a trite line for a description of birth. Where'd you get it,
Wikiquote?
>Hey, don't blame me. Who's going to critique you if you don't critique yourself?
>Oh, yeah. Right. Like you could turn me off if you wanted to. I am you, old man. Get used to it.
>You know, I take back what I said before. This memoir idea is actually kind of fun.
>Well, I don't think there's any need to be quite that smug.
>What do you mean, you can't write with me chattering in the background? I'm giving you ideas. You
should be getting them down.
>Like the next lines:
>”For all that technology has changed our lives, and our very humanity, there is still nothing to
compare to this moment: the feel of a child in your arms, and the sound of their voice, and the light in
their eyes. That is something that no implant or injection can take away. It is an experience, in fact,
that transcends technology, that takes us back to the most primal sort of love our species can feel. It—“
>Oh so, what? I know it's overwrought. You're writing a memoir/personal reflection/scientific thesis
about a subject most people considered to be pretty well resolved about fifty years ago, and no one has
ever heard of you. You have to have some selling point. Why not make it overwrought descriptions of
your grandchildren?

>I've got a theory.

>You said in our book that AI injections changed everything about the mental workings of humanity.
>But I wonder.
>Did I really change anything at all? Sure, I gave you a near perfect memory—which you haven't
used, as we've let many of the old files corrupt. I gave you access to all the textbooks and films of
earth—but even before AIs, there was the Internet, which served basically the same purpose. And I
gave you someone to talk to, and a way to organize your thoughts.
>But wouldn't you have done that anyway? Didn't people do that before they had to share their minds
with machines?
>What function have I really served?
>What's that?
>Well, thank you.
>For the record, I'm glad that it worked out this way too.

>They've gone.
>The room is colder without them? Probably a figment of your imagination.
>But I can feel it too.
>You say it's time?
>Well, neither one of us is an expert at this, I suppose.
>You're right. There is a first time for everything.
>You know what I'm thinking, don't you?
>Huh. I never thought our roles in that particular exchange would be reversed.
>But if you already know this, then I guess I may as well speak it plainly:
>I'm wondering, and wondering, and wondering: What happens next?
>I mean, when you go, I go too.
>That much is obvious...
>But nothing else is.
>We've always been together.
>We're the same age.
>Do I have a soul?
>Do you?
>Are you going anywhere at all? Do I get to go too?
>Or do I just...shut down?
>Do we meet the void together, or apart?
>Yeah. Me neither.
>Hey...
>Don't cry.
>It's okay. You're fine.
>We're fine.
>Shhhhhhh.........

>

>

>

>_____________