By Inessa Kotkov

The Anxiety of Cultural Differences

The very moment a person decides to start life in a new country, they can experi
ence vast cultural differences. For instance, all throughout adulthood, I vividl
y remember being caught in unfair social situations, harsh moral dilemmas, and i
nescapable life circumstances. Frankly, these tragic events always left me wary
and distrustful of other people. As soon as the plane vessel landed on North Ame
rican shores, I felt as though I had lost my true identity, and severed contact
with the outside world. All of a sudden, I felt extremely lonely, separated from
dear old friends, who kept me company and supported me throughout the years, es
pecially in dire, troublesome times. But now our bonds had weakened, and they ex
isted far away; in an alternate universe, where there was no hope of ever return
ing. It took a while to accept this fact, but I found ways to ease my mind of st
ress in the process. I gradually began to immerse myself in works of fiction, re
ading novels, watching foreign movies, and listening to classic music. Maybe I w
as searching for answers, or perhaps it was merely a distraction, but I realized
then that I had no intention of adapting to the traditional ways of doing thing
s this strange, foreign world. But in order to survive, venturing outdoors would
be inevitable. (Of course, it’s not as if I had sufficient resources to live in
some kind of self-imposed exile, anyway!)
After divorce with my husband occurred, I lost my sense of initial purpose. Only
my children were there to remind me, that I still had a duty to fulfill. It was
that keen sense of curiosity, that brave willingness to explore and adventure t
hat made life seem worthwhile. It was a foolish, almost child-like passion, but
looking back in retrospect, I do not regret it at all. Thanks to this chosen pat
h, I was granted the privilege of attending UWM -- a wonderful, prestigious scho
ol. If I remained dormant and idle, I would never encounter the rare persons who
attend this school as well. For the first time in over half a decade, I could b
reak free from the shackles of solitary confinement, and engage in various socia
l activities. My intention was renewed and clear: I resolved to find a place in
society where I definitely belonged. I simply grew tired of living like a slave
or zombie, being subjected to internal and external forces. I wanted to regain s
ome vestige of my former self, an understanding of freedom, and feel like a genu
ine human being again. One who could face herself in the mirror, without feeling
pain or remorse. I embraced mortality, the fact that I had vices and flaws, was
guilty of committing sins, making errors of judgment, among other things. For o
nce, I was only concerned about living according to whim, and taking pleasure in
the little things that bring joy. To do this, I rejected the status quo, and lo
st interest in trying to climb up the corporate ladder. To me, this was not as i
mportant as spiritual or artistic fulfillment. It was too shallow -- besides, I
have virtually no influence in the political sphere, so what was the point of mu
lling over these issues to the point of madness?
At first, I was daunted by the mystery of America. I was confused about capitali
sm as a viable economic system. All my life I’ve been told it was cruel and unju
st, prone to victimizing and exploiting lower classes for the sake of financial
gain. I heard horror tales, of tired children being forcing children to work in
dreadful, unsanitary conditions and whatnot. But I always took these words with
a grain of salt. I wondered if it was really true, or just a matter of perspect
ive. If they are indeed guilty of taking advantage of the weak, then how come so
me of these victims express gratitude for working at these places? The reason is
plain and obvious: their alterative fates are much worse: crime, prostitution,
scavenging through trash, ad nauseam… In other words, it’s impossible to tell, w
ithout getting to know them personally, and setting foot in their shoes. I concl
uded that these economic ideas may work perfectly well (at least in theory), but
they’re still being helmed by innately flawed human creatures at the reins. It
could easily spin out of control, if the original commission is ignored, or exec
uted in an unintended manner. As intelligent, sentient, autonomous beings, we ar
e motivated and driven by a plethora of personal agendas, so taking ideas and be
nding them in directions favorable to expected goals is to be naturally expected
. I mean, if everything was carried out in a strict, bureaucratic fashion, there
would be constant public outcry. It’s nigh to impossible to do things without m
aking sacrifices. For example, government is very similar to the profession of a
director, or a fine artist. We have specific ideas for our vision that we want
to replicate in actual conditions, but unfortunately we are always limited by fu
nding, resources, censorship, and the capabilities of those involved in the proj
ect. In other words, it’s really a collaborative effort, and modern civilization
tends to have disagreement on a broad range of topics. When this conflict arise
s, due to inner disputes, matters are usually settled with either compromise, or
destructive war campaigns.
Now, to establish a state ordained by a class of ruling elite, it requires the s
anctioning of many laws, and in some cases, the loss of individual autonomy. Thi
s is precisely why the pyramid hierarchy is such a popular system in the constru
ction of working economies. However, I can never fathom such a place existing, b
ecause people are willing to fight for freedom, not to mention that our society
is also dependant on random contributions and lucky discoveries. Despite the fac
t that my roots are of Russian heritage, and my culture is seen as “odd” by some
, I can still relate to fellow citizens who reside in the same nation through ba
sic, universal laws. That is, the simple willingness to let others be. To gain b
etter understanding of different cultures, we need to shatter these barriers of
language, make compromises, negotiate, and learn to delineate truth from illusio
n and fantasy. In other words, we need to broaden our horizons, and see things f
rom different points of view, instead of narrowing it down and living on the fri
nge. With this done, we can erode the fears that drain our conscious will to lov
e, and embrace the inner self that we secretly want to project. I believe ignora
nce and fear-mongering is the true enemy of this progress, because the only purp
ose they seem to serve is to fan the flames of war. The truth is, the native ori
gin of a person can only reveal so much in their actual character. You can make
assumptions based off impressions, but it will never be absolutely right unless
you get to know them on a personal level. Besides, human beings, as instinctive,
smart creatures, are known to question themselves, and even resort to deception
. It’s too dangerous and risky to assess personalities this way.
Yaping Tang, in her essay “Polite but Thirsty”, wrote that American schools make
exceptions and allow students to eat food in the middle of class. However, in h
er own native land, it’s considered rude to eat in the presence of other fellow
students, who may be hungry, malnourished or starving. I understand that class s
tratification plays a major role in civilized society, but it‘s very common to u
pset less fortunate individuals this way, even unintentionally. Of course people
will adhere to rules regardless, but I assure you, the moment they see an oppor
tunity without fear of consequence, they will strike, and try to enact revenge.
The school board knows that in order to suppress this vindictive rage, they cann
ot grant specific rights to people. Americans, on the other hand, have busy life
styles: attending school, working multiple shifts at jobs, caring for children o
r siblings, and so on. They barely have time to spare to reflection, let alone t
ime for a meager snack. As a result, fast food is preferred choice when it comes
to satisfying that craving to eat. However, fast food is problematic, as the in
gredients and substances within the food itself can be extremely addictive and h
azardous. But we don’t really pay attention to this detail, as long as our stoma
ch agrees to stop growling.
Russians, on the other end of the spectrum, do maintain a single job, mostly bec
ause they discovered exactly what they’re so passionate about, or simply follow
the path of their mothers and fathers. This is especially common among law enfor
cement, teachers, and fire departments. In addition, it seems discrimination is
worse in America. In Russia, I never had to worry about people treating me in wa
ys based off my gender or ethnicity, but here, I get paid less, even when I take
the job equally as serious and perform more tasks. In Russia, the issue of race
is virtually irrelevant, especially in jobs focused around mental rigors. In po
orer, undeveloped third-world nations, it is not uncommon to see slavery, even n
ow in the 21st century. I believe we can attribute this problem to rich CEOs, ba
nkers and executives, who all know that in order to make profit, it’s crucial to
 reduce spending, in spite of human decency. This is why American jobs are outs
ourced: Americans demand a certain quality of life, and it’s usually quite expen
sive compared to it’s foreign counterparts. If living expenses were equal throug
hout all realms, I can guarantee you there would be less incentive for the Fortu
ne 500 to invest and work abroad. Furthermore, since Buddhists and Hindu adheren
ts see no value in materialistic gain, they have little understanding of Western
values. If they’re being exploited, they probably don’t know it, and figure the
money they’re receiving is fair and balanced, when it’s actually extremely low,
and close to nothing.
Needless to say, in destitute countries, survival is of the utmost importance, t
aking priority above all other matters. For example, eating species of animal, s
uch as canines or felines may seem questionable to Americans, but be perfectly a
cceptable and necessary in some other countries, who must resort to doing this i
n order to feed their family. In other words, most Americans don’t understand wh
at it feels like to be utterly hopeless or desperate. Our modern generation is b
rave in almost every regard. In terms of ideologies, practice, and even the art
and style of living itself. We have difficulty maintaining a healthy balance, dr
awing lines between hobby and passion, etcetera. The final example for cultural
difference lies in the structure of society itself. In Mother Russia, social ser
vices, college, hospitals, and doctors were all handled and paid for by my month
ly check. In return, living was affordable, and I had no trouble paying for rent
, gas, water, electricity, or other basic, essential utilities. It was a smooth
operation run by the government, instead of private organizations, whose only in
terest was gaining revenue. Here, in America, living is urban cities is costly,
and people easily get stressed out and put in arbitrary situations, such as evic
tion. In this world, money literally rules supreme.
Knowing this information, it seems cultural differences happen because of the wa
y our unique societies function. However, personalities can be independent, or s
trongly influenced by culture. It’s variable and depends on many contributing f
actors. Several years ago, I had to deal with a xenophobic Spanish woman, who th
ought I was an idiot because she could not understand or relate to the way my cu
lture handled affairs. But another Spanish woman came to visit me in a hospital
when no one else could. Before then, I was treated very badly by racist black ne
ighbor, then I met an African American woman who treated me as if we was a famil
y member. Finally, I’m glad fellow students help me carry heavy objects to the g
ym, be polite and open doors in public places, and on rare occasions, give free
treats or presents to my beloved children. In conclusion, we simply cannot judge
people based off their cultural identity alone. It’s like looking at a compass:
you can see the pin point in a general direction, but it won’t tell you exactly
how many yards away your destination is, or what you might encounter there. The
best approach is to spend a lengthy amount of time getting to know someone as a
unique individual. I always enjoy listening to teachers from a diverse range of
backgrounds. They present interesting points of view, sometimes different than
my own. But these ideas are still mature and valid -- they deserve all the right
to express opinions on these subjects. I don’t know what the future holds in st
ore, but the trend does seem to be heading towards globalization. One possibilit
y is that cultures will become assimilated and homogenized into a single entity.
Whether this is a good or bad thing, remains to be seen, but I always welcome t
he prospect of peaceful co-existence, as long as we retain our civil liberty.

Work Cited
Yaping, Tang. “Polite but Thirsty”. MATSOL: Intercultural Communication,1996