Hindi Movie

By Jagadish

Paisa kaise ghar aaya

Aishwarya Rai: shaam ho gayi, bazaar se aata laye ki nahi

Shah Rukh khan: haa laya wo bhi teen kilo , khush
Aishwarya rai: Maine to do kilo manga that, teen kis khushi mein
Shah Rukhkhan: teen dino mien interview aa raha hai, tayar hona hain, is bazaar ke chakkar mein nahi
padna
Aishwarya rai : haa malum hain, par ghar grihasti kaise chalegi, pure chaar mahine ho gaye bina wetan
ke aur aap hain ki interview hi interview pe phel , kaise
Shah Rukhkhan: wo, padayi kum ki jab naukri thi, pata nahi tha ki shur se lekar ant tak job theek thak
rakhne ke liye padna zaroori hai
Aishwarya rai: aise kaise aap, mujhe to har samay aapke haatho mein pustak dikhti thi
Shahrukh khan: wo isliye bhagyawan, wah naukri bachane ki pustak nahi thi, tension relief ki pustak thi
Aishwarya rai: oh !!! Maine bhi dhyaan nahi diya
Shahrukh khan: recession khatam hone ko hain sare jahan mein aur main budhoo kisi kaamkaaz ka nahi
Aishwarya rai: aisa bolke meri bhi himmat tut Jane wali hai, jaisa pati waisi patni
Shahrukh khan: aage se no disheartening dialogues , khush
Aishwarya rai : khush

Paise ki boli sabzi mandi mein

Amir khan: kaisa hai bhav mere pyaare baingan ka

Arshad Warsi: sahib baingan mein kya rakha, Taaza aaloo ka zamana hai
Amir khan: wo kal hi kha chuka, daam bol
Arshad Warsi: pure chaalis rupaye

Amir khan: last week aya tha to tees tha, yeh chaalis kab ho gaya
Arshad Warsi: ek hafte mein aur meri nani bhi guzar gayi
Amir khan: ab teri nani marne ka shok bhi mein Karoo, pure tees rupaya dunga
Arshad Warsi: theek hai sahib
Amir Khan: Yeh Hui na baat
Amir khan: aaloo kitna
Arshad Warsi: ab aaloo ka daam pachas rupaya
Amir khan: oh baingan ka daam ghata aur aaloo ban gaye chalis ki jagh pachas
Arshad Warsi: kya kare sahib, zamana mehanga hai, aapko bagan militi hain, mujhko nahi
Amir khan: meri bhi middle class life hain, tu apne bacho ki shiksha school ke badle mein zilla mein karta
hain aur mujhe izzat bachane ke liye private school bhejna padta hain
Arshad Warsi: sahi hain sahib, aap apni jagah, mein apni jagah, par mehangai to mehangai hain
Amir khan : haa wo to sahi hai, bag mein daal sab, main chala job
Arshad Warsi: acha saab kal phir aana
Amir khan: nahi hafte mein ek baar, fresh stock rakh, yu kharid
Arshad Warsi: beshak, alvida sahib

Interview kis ke liye

Kabir Bedi: aapke records ke anusar aapne chaar mahine se kya kiya
Shah Rukh khan: attending interviews
Kabir Bedi: aapko kya lagta hain ki aap is baar interview jeet payenge
Shah Rukh khan: self belief
Kabir Bedi: hum kaise maan le ki is baar aapko lene se hamari taraki hogi

Shah Rukh khan: kachua agar jeetna chahe to hare se dosti karni padti hain
Amir khan : hum kachuye ko nahi lete
Shah Rukh khan : oh!!!!!
Kabir Bedi: itni baar aap interview mein fail huye uski wajah kya main jaan sakta hun
Shah Rukh khan: lack of reading proper books relating to subject
Amir khan: na padne wale bhi self belief mein yakeen rakhte hain
Shah Rukh khan: give me time I will prove my mettle ship
Kabir Bedi: wo kaise
Shah Rukh khan: I have 15 years of experience, bad luck has eaten me
Amir khan : humari company mein paanch sau log kaam karte hain, unko motivate kaise karenge
Shah Rukh khan: apne ko dikhakar aur example bankar motivate kar sakta hun
Amir khan: paanch sau log aise hi maan jayenge aapko dekhkar
Shah Rukh khan: five minutes time
Kabir Bedi: beshak , jitna waqt Lena chahe
Shah Rukh khan: ek prashn puch sakta hun
Kabir Bedi : beshak
Shah Rukh khan: competitor ko dekhkar aapne decisions li aur itni badi empire create ki, dusre bhi
mujhe dekhkar seekhkar business groom kar sakte hain
Amir khan: aur prashn kya hain
Shah Rukh khan : prashn prashn, please wait I am thinking
Kabir Bedi: business mein waqt nahi hota janab
Shah Rukh khan: oh!!!!! Sorry
Kabir Bedi: if selected we will call you for the post, thank you
Shah Rukh khan: thank you ufff!!!!

Naukri kaise mili bina paise se

Shah Rukh khan: naukri ki letter ayi hai is baar

Aishwarya rai : kis company ki
Shah Rukh khan: Kabir Bedi ki company se
Aishwarya rai: wo kaise, tumne to kaha tum select ho hi nahi sakte
Shah Rukh khan: haa par mili to sahi, jashn
Aishwarya rai : beshak , kya khaoge
Shah Rukh khan: gobi ke parathe
Aishwarya rai: joining date
Shah Rukh khan: ek mahine ke baad
Aishwarya rai: itni door
Shah Rukh khan: bank balance kitna hai
Aishwarya rai: ek lakh
Shahrukh khan : bas
Aishwarya rai: humne cheh mahine mein saare paise gave diye bache ki phees dene mein, dar lag gaya
tha ki tumhe naukri milegi bhi ya nahi
Shah Rukh khan : ab to mili to sahi
Aishwarya rai: wetan kitni hai
Shah Rukh khan : 1.5 lakhs
Aishwarya rai: back once again
Shahrukh khan : back
Aishwarya rai: papa puch rahe the , humko paise dene ke liye agar tumhe aage job na mili to
Shah Rukh khan : oh!!!
Aishwarya rai: is mahine mein ghar kaise chaloon
Shah Rukh khan: pur day basis pandrah hazar puri rakhkhar har din paanch sau ka wetan lagakar

Aishwarya rai: very smart

Shah Rukh khan: thank you

Jab paisa jyada ho to

Amir khan: ab biwi kya hua

Sushmita Sen: bache ki tution fee pay karni hai
Amir khan : kal hi to diya tha bees hazar rupaya bank se withdraw karke
Sushmita Sen: kharch kar di Maine nek kaam par , humari kiti party ne ghoshna patr kar di ki sab biwiya
jinke paas paisa ho to majdoor ki padayi likhayi
Amir khan: agar main control nahi kar saka to tum to mere ko diwala kar jaogi
Sushmita Sen : sorry
Amir khan: ek baat batao, hum malamall kaise jo itni badi rakm ada kar di bina jaanch padtal kiye
Sushmita Sen: CEO family
Amir khan: malum hain CEO family par paisa ped par ugta hi nahi, aur aap mahashray kabhi kaam karte
bhi nahi
Sushmita Sen: mein kyon, pati teen lakh har mahine late hain
Amir khan: haan haan main bank balance and you are withdrawal, bata kitne paise chahiye, is baar to
nadaani mat kar, yeh association teri, main to buri tarah phasa
Sushmita Sen : pachees hazar
Amir khan : fine , check likh raha hoon, is baar bacha
Sushmita Sen: fine , thanks

Job mein paise ki keemat

Salman khan: mein Kabir Bedi ka beta aap sabko dhayawad bolta hoon jinhone kadi mehnat karke
hamari company ko is mukam par pahunchaya hai
Amir khan: thank you sir
Salman khan: aaj se yeh business main run karoonga aur kuch usul humari company ka jo aap sab ko
nibhana padega

Pehla usul: jitna wetan usse dugni tarakki manjoor

Sab : manjoor
Doosra usul: jo koi bhi paise lega in the form of loan, unko paise cheh mahine ke anar wapas karna
padega manjoor
Sab : manjoor
Teesra aur akhiri usul: jo koi bhi paisa lekar farar, usko zindagi mein job nahi milega manjur
Sab : manjur

Salman khan: ok boys and women apne kaam par lag jayiye
Amir khan : sir , Shahrukh khan
Salman khan: ek project specifically aapke liye karenge
Shahrukh khan : beshak
Salman khan: show him my room
Amir khan: yes sir

Paiso se kaam kaise hoti hain

Salman khan: aapka naam phir se

Shahrukh khan : Shahrukh

Salman khan : haa Shah Rukh ji kaam bahut seedha hai, apko pachas lakh diya jayega, business of mine
advertising sambhalne ke liye uska dugna karke mujhko lautana hain manjur
Shahrukh khan : manjur
Salman khan : done , mera khaas Aadmi Akshay Kumar aapko kaam sikha dega, equal partner of yours,
kaam seekhiye aur aap malamaal at end of project
Bring in Akshay Kumar

Akshay Kumar: yes sir

Salman khan: Kaam Shah Rukh ko samjahiye aur aapki promotion or bonus check waiting for you
Akshay Kumar: thank you sir
Salman khan : shah Rukh Akshay Kumar ne is saal dugni nahi triguni tarakki karke advertising ka naam
uncha kiya hai, I am giving you the best guy of our company aur kuch chahiye
Shah Rukh khan: nahi sir , happy
Salman khan : me too
Salman khan : ok Akshay, here is Shahrukh and here is your check, fine phir milenge

Paiso ki taakat

Shah rukh khan : congrats akshay tune to kamaal kar diya, ek hi jhatke mein triguna affect, manna
padega wakay I feel proud to associate with you
Akshay Kumar : thanks
Shah Rukh khan: ab aage kya karna hai
Akshay Kumar: main apna check or bonus le loo phir baat karenge
Shah Rukh khan: fine , I will wait for you
Akshay Kumar: mil gayi aur online mein transfer bhi ho gayi paise, yaha pe paisa yun kama sakte hain
Shahrukh khan: phir to achi baat hain

Akshay Kumar: phir kaam shuru kare

Shah Rukh khan: beshak next
Akshay Kumar: ab jo project tayar huyi hain, usko aage le jaana hain without losing money, kitna actually
paisa sanction hua hain
Shah Rukh khan: pachas lakh
Akshay Kumar: normally is tarah ki projecto mein bees lakh se jyada milte bhi nahi, they look after
welfare of employees
Shah Rukh khan : oh !!!!

Project goes haywire

Salman khan: project of Akshay Kumar is fabulous, company pragatisheel ban rahi hain amir
Amir Khan: Yeh to khushi ki baat hain par kya main project dekh sakta hun
Salman khan : beshak , yeh rahi
Amir khan: kitna bonus diya Akshay Kumar ko
Salman khan: dus percent of profits earned
Amir khan: that is excess than what kabir sir actually proclaims
Salman khan: kaam karo aur bhageedar na bano, I am broad minded
Amir khan: kabir sir bhi aise hi the
Salman khan : thanks , papa ki project ab meri, usko bulandi pe le Jane ki baari hum sabki without losing
paisa
Amir khan: wo to haan, paisa na ho to Aadmi ki aukad zero
Salman Khan: Yeh dekh kabir industry ka biggest project success
Amir khan : beshak
Salman khan: kuch tense
Amir khan: haan, sixth sense

Salman Khan: Yeh to buri baat hain , haa haa haa

Amir khan: project ki logo kisi competitor ki yaad dilati hain
Salman khan: wo logo nayi hain, brand fresh
Amir khan : kyon
Salman khan: bhai jab son takes over empire logo to fresh honi chahiye
Amir khan : oh!!!
Amir khan: kisne sketch aur pass karvayi
Salman khan: wo Akshay Kumar
Amir khan: aur aapne dekhi bhi nahi
Salman khan : nahi
Amir khan: main puch sakta hoon kyon
Salman khan: Akshay ne galat kiya kya kuch
Amir khan: aap batayiye to sahi
Salman khan: take over from father ki tension mein nahi dekh paya
Amir khan : he unexpectedly copied competitor logo as company logo and passed it in patent without
verifying it
Salman khan : gone
Amir khan: kareeb bees karod ki loss hogi
Salman khan : usse kam
Amir khan: hogi bhi nahi, agar huyi to luck
Salman khan : ab
Amir khan: bring in the team and verify
Salman khan : beshak

Paisa kaise haath se fisla

Akshay Kumar: good morning sir

Shah Rukh khan: good morning sir
Salman khan: good morning
Amir khan: aap logo ke samne kya hain
Akshay Kumar: Sir humari project on the wall
Amir khan: use gaur se dekhiye
Shah Rukh khan: we didnt understand
Salman khan: aapne kabhi hidden object game khela
Shah Rukh khan: nahi sir, par beta jaroor khelne mein mahir hai
Amir khan: ab aap bhi mahir ho hi jayenge
Shah Rukh khan: sir mere aye kuch mahine hi huye hain, Jauhari ka kaam to aap hi logo ke saath
seekhoonga
Salman khan : beshak
Salman khan: aap hamari company mein kitni der tak tike hain
Akshay Kumar: yehi kuch paanch saal
Amir khan: aur aapne khud is logo ka avishkaar kiya hai
Akshay Kumar: yes sir
Salman khan: paise bhi mile hamari aur se
Akshay Kumar: yes sir
Amir Khan: Yeh logo aapne kahi se churaya nahi
Akshay Kumar: nahi sir ispar Maine research bhi kiya hain aur teen mahine ki experience bhi hain
Salman khan : oh!!!
Amir khan : kaisi research

Akshay Kumar: internet sir

Salman khan : internet
Akshay Kumar : internet
Shah Rukh khan: yes sir, unhone kud bataya hain aur team bhi hain sir, if you permit us
Amir khan: kabhi shipyard gaye ho
Akshay Kumar: no sir why
Amir khan: nahi logo unka ho sakta hain
Akshay Kumar: oh !!! Sir har industry segment ka anuman lagana to mushkil ka kaam hain
Amir khan: aapne shipyard company ki logo churayi hai, mante hain ya nahi
Akshay Kumar: no sir its not possible teen mahine ki kadi mehnat hain par yeh bata jaroor sakta hoon ki
shipyard was missing from our research
Shah Rukh khan: sir , jitni der se Maine Akshay ji ke saath kaam kiya hain, we aisi neech harkat kar hi
nahi sakte
Salman khan: meeting barkhast

Paiso ki munafa kitna hua

Amir khan : sir , shipyard se Vidya Balan aur Kangana Ranaut ka phone hai
Salman khan: tell them I am meeting them face to face all alone
Amir khan: fine sir

After 1 hour

Vidya Balan: kahiye salmanji, hum aap par mukhadma dayar kare , pure paanch karod ki gaplabaji ki hain
humari Sanstha ka logo churake
Salman khan: sorry aage se nahi hoga
Vidya Balan: to aap mafi mangte hain

Salman khan : haan

Kangana Ranaut: main Vidya Balan ki vakeel, sign it here and here
Salman khan: what is it
Kangana Ranaut: papers hain jo aapne accept kiye ki aapne without any pressure accepted to give
paanch crores to Vidya Balan without filing petition in the court
Vidya Balan: waise bhi humari ngo company hain aur hum paiso ke liye mukadma dayar karke apna aur
aapka waqt jayara nahi karna chahte
Kangana Ranaut: we can leave the case without any money but companies dont run like that,
explanations deni padti hain, chaho ya na chaho
Salman khan: wo to sahi hain , thanks
Vidya Balan: sorry for what happened, malum hain apne galti nahi ki, isliye face to face settle kar di,
thanks for cooperating without creating tension from both sides
Salman khan: jaate jaate muh to meetha kariye
Vidya Balan : kis khushi mein
Salman khan: meri business sole trader banne wali thi agar aapne mukadma dayar ki hoti to, so thanks
Kangana ranaut : beshak , thanks, bye

Paisa aur izzat ki roti

Akshay Kumar left the company feeling ashamed of himself for letting down and returned back the
bonuses and cash given to him, he is working for another company
Shah Rukh khan as usual is working with the company because he was not part of the team which
designed the logo
Amir khan became loyal and extra loyal to Salman khan keeping the business intact
Salman khan lost and won money based upon performance of his employees and keeps telling everyone
without employees he is nobody

Vidya Balan ran the ngo and then collapsed because she was too altruistic than normal
Kangana Ranaut left the ngo once it collapsed and started her career once again
Aishwarya rai never took money from the father because her husband kept the promise that he would
work till he is competent
Sushmita Sen left the women's club and settled down as housewife realizing that money is crucial for
her family and it is not donated for fun without approval from family members

Aur akhir mein main bhul gaya sabji wala ab bhi daam girata hain aur badata hai, apni marzi ka Malik
hain aur kabhi kabhar uske sadasya gujar bhi jaate hi

END