ASTRAL TRAVELS

Written By A Lazy Writer

ASTRAL TRAVELS
Written by A Lazy Writer

CONTENT

Chapter One - Food (verse 1) Deep Fried Marathon

(verse 2) A Need For Greed In The Face Of Abundance
(verse 3) Yellow And Brown Swirly Chocolate Pie And Custard
Chapter Two - Care Support Working (verse 4) Arti Intel The Care Support Worker
(verse 5) Looking after the vulnerables
(verse 6) The Visit
(verse 7) What Did He Reply?
Chapter Three - Holiday Vacation (verse 8) Dream Logic
(verse 9) Inspired
(verse 10) The Cockles Of His Heart
Chapter Four - Criminal Behaviour (verse 11) Taking Cover
(verse 12) The Scene
(verse 13) 'This Geezer'
Chapter Five - Astral, Family And Friend (verse 14) Reluctant
(verse 15) Met Het Yet?
(verse 16) Grow Up!
(verse 17) Neighbourhood Watch
(verse 18) Screams And Dreams Within Dreams
(verse 19) What?

(verse 20) Tested

(verse 21) Things Happen In Threes
Chapter Six - Astral Thoughts (verse 22) Old School
(verse 23) Talking Is Incorrect
(verse 24) Tiny Planet
(verse 25) Inductive Reason Is Not Proof
(verse 26) 'Fold It'
Chapter Seven - Unwanted Musician (verse 27) Positions Please
(verse 28) Back In The Warehouse
(verse 29) There Was Only Disdain
(verse 30) That, That Is Within The Delivery
(verse 31) Wake Up!
Chapter Eight - Down In The Toilet (verse 32) This Crap Job
(verse 33) Oi! Fart Arse!
Chapter Nine - Off Track (verse 34) Terms And Conditions
(verse 35) Arti Intel Goes Rouge
Chapter Ten - The Asian Aspect (verse 36) The Piss Take
(verse 37) Manipulation
(verse 38) Public Transport
Chapter Eleven - Presentations (verse 39) Presenting himself
(verse 40) Remember Roy Castle?

Chapter Twelve - Other Consciousness (verse 41) Dog Fish

(verse 42) A Ghostly Appearance
(verse 43) The Technician
(verse 44) Shifting Realities
Chapter Thirteen - I'm Happy And I Know It (verse 45) Roll Up, Roll Up
(verse 46) The Book Of Life
(verse 47) Women Who Organise
(verse 48) Astral's Dream Girl

Chapter One - Food

(verse 1) Deep Fried Marathon
(verse 2) A Need For Greed In The Face Of Abundance
(verse 3) Yellow And Brown Swirly Chocolate Pie And Custard

(verse 1) Deep Fried Marathon

Astral was with his friend Muhammad at the pavilion. They

were going out on a motorcycle. Astral was going pillion, but
before they did they had to take the panniers off, then this
old lady called them. Muhammad had been quizzing this lady
previously. She showed them a fancy twenty pence piece
with colourful inscriptions on it and Astral asked her if she
had seen the new plastic five pound note. So Muhammad
was asking this old lady some questions and she was
interested to answer. Astral was fascinated by her hair and
the way that it had been cut. It had been cut really short at
the back, but there were small fuzzy dots within this really
short hair at the back and sides and the rest of her hair was
longish and a dark brown in colour. Astral was doing some
deep fried cooking outside. Some other people had set it all
up. Astral was very conscious of those people around him.
He was concerned that he would get in their way as he was
putting all sorts of food in the deep fat fryer, but he could
not find all the utensils that he needed, so Astral was
running about trying to find these utensils. It was like a
marathon where every so often there were tables set up, but
instead of cups of water they had food and deep fat fryers on
them. There was a tray full of dough for making pizza
afterwards, for when they had done with the deep fat frying.
So when Astral did finally find the utensils and some plates
and he had got back to the deep fat fryer, the food that
Astral had put into the deep fat fryer had been taken out and
there was no trace of the food anywhere.
Astral Could remember that there used to be a chocolate bar
called a 'Marathon' before the name was changed to a
'Snicker.' If you took a chocolate bar like this into your local
fish and chip shop then they would batter it and deep fat fry
it for you. This was probably the fattiest and most

unhealthiest meal that Astral could imagine.

(verse 2) A Need For Greed In The Face Of Abundance

Dreaming of an abundance of words, the abundance of
words was represented by the word 'all', which sat on the top
of a pile of other words and these words became a slice of
bread. So Astral ate the slice of bread and the problem was
solved.

(verse 3) Yellow And Brown Swirly Chocolate Pie And Custard

It was a quiz on food. You had to answer the question in two
parts. If you got the questions right, you got the food. Astral
had his eye on a yellow and brown swirly chocolate pie And
custard. There was a black lad and Astral was being polite.
He was wondering did the black lad want the pudding? Astral
smiled at him as he made his way to hold the silvery spoon
in the yellow and brown swirly chocolate pie And custard.
The black lad was okay with Astral and so he was thinking
that it would be okay for him to have this pudding, but then
Astral had to disappear before he could get a chance to eat
it.

Chapter Two - Care Support Working

(verse 4) Arti Intel The Care Support Worker
(verse 5) Looking after the vulnerables

(verse 6) The Visit

(verse 7) What Did He Reply?

(verse 4) Arti Intel The Care Support Worker

Astral was back in his old job looking after people who had
challenging behaviour. He was spending all his time stopping
a female client from scratching people and himself with her
nails. The other staff were mostly leaving it to Astral to deal
with her. He met another staff member who he had not seen
for a long time, but she looked different to how she used to
look. She had become much calmer, more distant. He looked
into her eyes as she was helping him to restrain this lady. He
wondered if she still recognised him, but she was cool and
unreadable.

(verse 5) Looking after the vulnerables

Astral was travelling with a group of people. Some of these
people were care support workers and some of these people
were their service user clients. They were discretely
discussing how their service user clients were getting on and
some of the difficulties that they were facing. So as the care
support workers were sharing their concerns for their service
user clients. It was all a bit vague, but there was another
female care support worker who Astral was talking to and
they were talking about somewhere called Liverplace, not
Liverpool but Liverplace. This all appears bland now because
the subtleties of their discussions have been lost in the
vaguity of Astrals recall.

(verse 6) The Visit

Astral went away with his old work friend Muhammad.
Muhammad took Astral for a spin in his car at very high
speed. They checked into a hotel and went to their separate
rooms. Astral left his card in a machine reader in his room
and the staff behind the desk reminded Astral to take out his
card and he thanked the lady for reminding him. The hotel
then became more hospitaly. It became clinical. Astrals mum
and his sister were there. Astrals sister was relying on her
mum and she was telling her mum how helpful she was, just
by being there. Astral was getting bored just listening to
their conversations so he decided to go off. So he walked
away and in this clinical setting there was a lad in a
wheelchair who Astral had gone to visit, although he did not
know who this lad was? This lad was messing around
strapping Astral up with straps from the his wheelchair.
Astral was going along with this knowing that he could easily
get out of it, but then the lad in the wheelchair suddenly
seemed to have a seizure. Astral called staff. A male nurse
came rushing over, then the lad in the wheelchair
miraculously became okay again and Astral let him out
through a door into the next room. Astral asked him, are you
allowed in this room and the lad in the wheelchair reassured
him, but Astral was not too sure about this so on leaving the
ward Astral told the male nurse what he had done and the
nurse said that that was okay. Astral went outside, it was
nice and sunny. There was a school next door and behind a
very high brick wall you could see a fountain shooting up
behind the wall. Astral had a packet of cigarettes in his hand
and he was struggling to get into the packet, because he had
opened them up upside down, or so he thought, but then the
cigarettes were the right way up, but the silver foil was

folded over them, so they had been packed wrong. Then

Astral pulled out a skinny roll up that he had put in there
previously. He thought as he pulled it out 'I don't know why I
have saved that in there because I will not want to smoke it.'
So then he pulled out a filter cigarette and he was smoking
that. Suddenly over the wall where the school was these
fountain spouts started to act strange. There was a massive
pressure of water and it came out like a water cannon high
up into the air. Suddenly there was a rumble and someone
shouted out, "What's that!" and as Astral looked into the
distance there was a massive tidal wave. Astral thought
'that's a tsunami' and someone said, "We are living in
strange times." At first Astral was concerned with his safety
but then he became more relaxed and carried on enjoying
his cigarette and as he looked out into the distance the wave
became iridescent. It was blurring into rainbow colours. It
was a very impressive sight. Later it started snowing and
Astral watched the flakes of snow gently descend to the
ground as he carried on smoking his cigarette. The distant
view had become grey.

(verse 7) What Did He Reply?

Astral wasn't fully asleep but in his dreaminess he was
cycling down a road and he passed these people coming the
opposite way. One of them said, "Hey! Watch it, he is liable
to lash out, he will direct it" and this man demonstrated this
in slow motion with his own fist up to his own jaw line. Astral
got the sense that this man was more of a correctional
officer than a care support worker and this man had five
dodgy people with him. There was a tall man to the right of
the correctional officer and he looked like he might be
autistic. This was the man that Astral was warned about and

the man that Astral had cycled closest to from the opposite
direction. There was another man to the left of the
correctional officer and three more in a wheelchair being
pushed along. They were all sat in a row. One in the front,
one in the middle and one at the back. By this time Astral
had cycled past and he was looking back. Astral said to the
correctional officer, "They make you work don't they?" The
correctional officers reply was incoherent and Astral was
trying to understand what had just been said when ...

Chapter Three - Holiday Vacation

(verse 8) Dream Logic
(verse 9) Inspired
(verse 10) The Cockles Of His Heart

(verse 8) Dream Logic

Astral was meditating on a sandy beach by the sea and as
he did so he tried to work out how long he had meditated for.
Through a diagonal lattice, in his minds eye Astral could see
if he had meditated for an odd number of days or an even
number of days and to see if he had meditated for an odd
number of nights or an even number of nights. The diagonal
lattice was a map of linear and non linear timelines and so in
his meditative state he did his subconscious calculations.

(verse 9) Inspired

Astral was dreaming about the sunny foreign beach as a

relaxing piano jazz song. Muhammad was there, the god like
womaniser, cool dude. Astral was determined to get to the
sandy sunny beach as he checked out of this building with a
circular doorway entrance. He made sure that he was on that
dream beach and enjoying the sunshine freedom of his
travel. Astral then made his way back to the large building.
He came back through a different entrance. Two privileged
people got in Astrals way briefly as they walked across his
path in front of him to get to a table and sit down resting
their baggage. Astral had witnessed Muhammad the god like
womaniser, casually and coolly socialising on the beach. 'So
why could I not be that cool?' Astral thought to himself as he
made his modest way in comparison to Muhammad.
Muhammad was truly an inspiration.

(verse 10) The Cockles Of His Heart

Astral had his little white tub of cockles as he drove up in his
massive motor home. He made a wrong turn, looking back
he could see the arrow pointing to the double doors that he
should have driven through, but he carried on driving on a
pedestrian way. There were signs and symbols and arrows
pointing here there and everyway as he drove ever higher up
the green slopes. As he found himself and his motor home in
the highest room in the house. Astral had a problem though.
There was only parking for the disabled. He looked around
and all the parking spaces had disabled symbols in them. He
took his sealed white round tub of cockles out of his pocket
and place them on a table in the room before descending the
steep decline in his motor home down the green ramps.
Astral was aware of a large group of pedestrians outside the

building. So as he descends the steepness of the decline, it

was a bit overwhelming for him, and so cautiously he slowly
managed to manoeuvre his huge motor home, his massive
motor down these green cliff like ramps. Astral had a
knowing that he would meet the pedestrians ascending as
he made his descent. He also knew that they would be going
up into the room where he had left his cockles. 'I should
really have put those cockles in the fridge and here I am
driving down a pedestrian way.' These were his thoughts and
he was unsure of himself.

Chapter Four - Criminal Behaviour

(verse 11) Taking Cover
(verse 12) The Scene
(verse 13) 'This Geezer'

(verse 11) Taking Cover

Astral could hear noisy aircraft so he was hiding out from the
aircraft as a voice in his head said, "Do you think that they
cannot get you from there?" Astral hid a little better and the
voice in his head said, "Good." It looked like it was a
helicopter. Cream in colour as Astral saw it briefly between
two buildings in the distance.

(verse 12) The Scene

People wanted to know details about a bridge and the police

force who were represented by this man with a megaphone,

was shouting out the details. People came rushing to get the
details, but only the first person to arrive got the details,
'because people wanted to know.' But on giving the details
across they were fumbled and the details tumbled and the
people were unhappy as to how the details were handled.
Astral was on the bridge during the whole time. It was a
pedestrian bridge with ramps either side. What the bridge
was going over is a bit unclear as it was foggy, but Astral
thought that it might have been a river? This is probably one
of the details mishandled by the police. Astral was an
observer in this scene. He was not the police and he was not
the public rushing forward for details. It was a young lad
about twenty years old who arrived at the police first
followed by some women. The fumbling between the lad and
the police was represented by a square which was about an
inch square and as it tumbled, it tumbled down through a
model of the foot bridge. It was clear to see in the publics
eyes that they were annoyed. It was a silent disgust aimed
at the police through the eyes of the public who were
indignant. As with so many other details there was much
more to this story that has been unremembered. What has
led up to this scene has been unremembered?

(verse 13) 'This Geezer'

They were having a bit of banter 'This Geezer' and Astral.
'This Geezer' had thick dark side burns and a dark
moustache and spoke in a gruff voice. They were slowly
chasing each other in old fashioned gangster cars and
coming up with catch phrases. 'This Geezer' came up with
"Don't chase me round again" and Astral came up with

"Don't say those words again." There were others there too
who were also involved. It all came to a head when 'This
Geezer', who Astral had never met before, pranged his car.
The next thing Astral noticed was that the pavement was
opening up and 'This Geezer' drove himself and his car under
his own house. Astral watched in detail as the pavement
closed back up and sealed back up with 'This Geezers' six
foot high house wall. With that Astral looked around to find
that he was on his own, everyone has gone.

Chapter Five - Astral, Family And Friend

(verse
(verse
(verse
(verse
(verse
(verse
(verse
(verse

14)
15)
16)
17)
18)
19)
20)
21)

Reluctant
Met Het Yet?
Grow Up!
Neighbourhood Watch
Screams And Dreams Within Dreams
What?
Tested
Things Happen In Threes

(verse 14) Reluctant

Astral was put into a position where he had to look after a
baby. The parents just went off without taking their baby and
he was left with this baby in the street. Astral could not just
leave the baby. Somehow he found himself in someones
house and these people were fussing the baby. Astral felt

guilty that he had not looked after the baby properly. Astral
had a melt down and exclaimed, "I can't look after the baby
I'm only 12! Not really I'm 35." The people laughed at Astral
and he retorted, "I need to get the police. Does anyone know
whose baby this is?" But nobody knew the parents of the
baby.

(verse 15) Met Het Yet?

Astrals sister said, "I was talking to Hetty Hothead yesterday
and I said to her, you are the drama queen and she said, "Oh
no I'm not the drama queen, thank you."" Astrals sister was
talking to Astral on the phone which was different, because
they had just been talking face to face in the previous
instance. This was also unusual because Astrals sister does
not know Hetty Hothead, as Hetty Hothead is Astrals ex
girlfriends friend. Astrals sister has never met Hetty Hothead
as they live sixty miles away from each other and they are in
very different social circles. Previously before the telephone
call, Astrals memory had gone vague, but he did remember
that there was Muhammad and Astrals sisters husband
there. Astral thought that Muhammad and he were talking
about music? Astral was not too sure about that though.

(verse 16) Grow Up!

It was like Astral was in a discussion group. There were three
of them. Astral, Astrals dad and some chap who was saying
that the lyrics of old songs are better. They were also talking
about how bad it was to play practical jokes on fathers' day.

As they were talking Astral had made a model out of nails

and he was playing with it. Moving it around with his hands
like a child would to animate it and he was saying,
"Exterminate, exterminate." Like a Dalek from Dr Who. Astral
thought to himself 'I'm being childish' and so Astral casually
threw the model of nails to the ground. There was more to
this discussion group, but this last scene is all that Astral can
remember after searching his mind for a little while. Astral
thought that the premise of the discussion group was that
things had not progressed for the better, which was a case in
point about practical jokes on fathers' day and that the lyrics
to songs were much better written than the lyrics of the new
songs that we get now.

(verse 17) Neighbourhood Watch

Astral had the feeling that he was living on a caravan site
and he was playing his guitar. He noticed that there was
someone, down hill across the way. Astral thought, 'I hope
that I am not disturbing the neighbours with my guitar
playing.' The next thing he knows the neighbour is showing
him his rifle and it is fixed to a stand and the neighbour is
demonstrating to Astral how the rifle and stand works. His
neighbour is leaning on his rifle and stand whilst aiming to
fire, but he is aiming in all directions quickly as if there are
moving targets. Astral liked to go out with his guitar in a
cloth case that he strapped to his back and so Astral was
thinking, 'I bet he thinks that it is a fishing rod and that I go
fishing.' So Astral explained to his neighbour that he does
not go fishing, but that he likes to go down by the river to
play his guitar. So then Astral was looking for a guitar amp.
He had the choice of two amps, he chose the smaller one.

His neighbour said, "That's a small amp." and Astral said,

"Yes, It's a practice amp." Astral noticed that the plug was
broken. It did not have the copper earth pin in it. So Astral
was looking for another plug to fix this one and he noticed
another plug without an earth pin in it. He was thinking,
'Why are all these plugs without earth pins?' So then they
just hung out and listened to music and had a chat before his
neighbours children came. On their arrival his neighbour said
that he would have to go. Astral did not know who this man
was. He remembered his personality and what he looked
like, but he did not know him. He did not recognise him from
anywhere. When they were chatting Astral was explaining
how he was not working. Astral was trying to find some
common ground. Astral asked his neighbour "what sort of
music do you like?" His neighbour didn't quite hear Astral
with the music on. The neighbour asked Astral, "What did
you say?", but Astral did not repeat himself. He got the
impression that his neighbour was more into hunting and
fishing. Astral was living on his own so it was good to have a
short casual chat with a neighbour that he had not met
before.

(verse 18) Screams And Dreams Within Dreams

Astral was asleep and in his sleep he was dreaming that he
was asleep dreaming. In that dream Astral was consciously
trying to be happy by singing in his sleep. He was singing so
that the darkness could not get to him. This was a lucid
dream because in his sleep he knew that he was asleep and
he was concerned that he might be singing in the waking
world whilst he was singing in his sleep. Astral imagined that
he was loud and noisily disturbing the household as he was

sleeping, then there was a short scream from the bedroom

next door. It was Astrals sister, Astral thought, 'that is not
the first time that she has screamed. I wonder if she is
having a nightmare or maybe she can hear my singing and I
am disturbing her?' Astral was singing a song that he had
made up in the moment: 'Forever Is Where I Go Now.' There
was a chill down Astrals spine as he woke up. Astral thought
that he was in his old bedroom, waking up in his old bed
from twenty years ago. Astral was looking around to get
orientated when he woke up in his real bed. There were chills
still going down his spine as he started to recall what had
just happened. He was hoping that his sister was okay.

(verse 19) What?

Astrals ex partner and her sister were looking for each other
to become water sisters?

(verse 20) Tested

Astral was lamenting how spiritually undeveloped he was,
but then he had the idea that he was limitated and that
maybe it was not as bad as he first thought. Astral was sat
on a bus next to his ex partners sister and his ex partner was
there too. They were testing their blood and there was a
trace of a drop of blood. Astrals ex partner said, "Yes, that's
how it goes." They pricked their thumbs and that's how they
were testing to see if a drop of blood showed up in a black
tray that looked a bit like an egg box with its individual
compartments. At the bottom of these individual

compartments was where they looked to see if they could

see a drop of blood and in one of these compartments there
was a drop of blood.

(verse 21) Things Happen In Threes.

i,
Astral was playing a computer game and as he was using the
game controller his hand gestures were impolite. No matter
what he did he could not help but make impolite hand
gestures as he used his game controller.
ii,
Astral walked in and out of his caravan, the steps were
broken. There were foot prints that had been made
previously, they had approached the broken steps at an
angle to avoid the rubble and Astral did the same. He went
nowhere and he came back from nothing.
iii,
Astral was discussing time lines with his sister: "If you don't
have an experience, then all those time lines associated with
that experience are not accessible to you." he explained to
his sister. "Yes I believe that." She concluded in agreement.
Astral had pencil drawn a picture. He asked his sister if she
liked it. They discussed the starkness of the light against the
dark and the contrast between them and then to Astral's
horror she was penciling in the light shades, but he was cool.

Chapter Six - Astral Thoughts

(verse
(verse
(verse
(verse
(verse

22)
23)
24)
25)
26)

Old School
Talking Is Incorrect
Tiny Planet
Inductive Reason Is Not Proof
'Fold It'

(verse 22) Old School

Astral was sitting a test in class and he had written many
paragraphs before handing it in. Later in the class as the
tutor was marking the tests he held up Astrals test and said
whilst laughing "You know you are very lucky with this one."
Astral knew what he meant because he had written in a style
that was so generic that it only answered the test in a very
superficial way. Astral was wondering if he would get away
with it, but then he thought to himself, 'Well that IS my style
of writing.'

(verse 23) Talking Is Incorrect

x plus x equals talking. He went crazy writing on Astral
stabbing him with his pen. Astral was with a lady and she
was surprised at what he did to Astral, but that is what you
get when you do mathematics with challenging behaviour.

(verse 24) Tiny Planet

There was a pea on a spherical octahedron walking around

on it like it was a tiny planet. Astral thought that the pea was
reading a news paper, but on further inspection he realised
that it was a map of equilateral triangles each of which had a
different colour that corresponded to the triangles on the
spherical octahedron that the pea was walking on. This tiny
planet was infinitely large because it could rotated with any
infinite number of degrees and so it had a dark side that the
pea could never walk to.

(verse 25) Inductive Reason Is Not Proof

Astral had been talking to extra terrestrials. They were
Pleiadian and he could only remember a problem that he
was given. The Pleiadians just said, "Create 28 from 47?"
Astral soon came up with (2^2)((2^3)-1) = 4 x 7 = 28 and
the answer was perfect. After a little more thought Astral
decided that (2^(P-1))((2^P)-1) is always perfect if P is a
prime number, but he did not know how to prove it.

(verse 26) 'Fold It'

Astral was in a group of people beings called 'number
beings', just a 'fold it.' The collective noun for number
beings. Astral could be any number, just like he could be any
number base in which to work from.

Chapter Seven - Unwanted Musician

(verse
(verse
(verse
(verse
(verse

27)
28)
29)
30)
31)

Positions Please
Back In The Warehouse
There Was Only Disdain
That, That Is Within The Delivery
Wake Up!

(verse 27) Positions Please

Astral had a double bass and he was really trying to play the
double bass nicely. He was thinking that he was playing okay.
It was in a big hall full of people. There were a lot of Chinese
people there. The double bass had holes in it to sing through
about an inch, or two and a half centimetres in diameter. So
as Astral was playing his double bass, he was not confident
and there were some youngsters who were laughing at him
and his playing of the double bass. Next thing there was an
activity. Astral had never heard anyone say anything to him,
he just knew that he had to assemble with some of the other
people in the hall. Astral was walking across the hall with his
double bass and as he was assembling with the other people
he realized that he was the only one with a double bass. It
was then that Astral realised that they were all meeting up
to sing. They were supposed to sing through these holes. So
Astral clumsily rested his double bass by the wall under the
window and then he finally got himself into place.

(verse 28) Back In The Warehouse

Two of Astrals friends were round and they were talking

music and playing guitar. Astral asked one of his friends
"What can you play?" As his friend had his acoustic guitar
with him and he was strumming a little. Astrals other friend
said "Send me your email when you are in Germany and we
will send you some of our stuff that we do." Astral said okay
and he went off and he was walking out, it was a warehouse.
Astral passed someone else who had just walked into the
warehouse. Astral aknowledged him, but he did not know
him. Astral was just going to walk out the building when he
thought 'I've forgotten my guitar.' Astral was going back for
his guitar and the man who Astral aknowledeged earlier was
opening up some shutters. The shutters were operated by
chains and the chains hung down to the ground and as the
chains were being pulled down, the shutters were being
lifted up vertically.

(verse 29) There Was Only Disdain

Astral was complaining that there was nowhere private
anywhere for him to play his acoustic guitar. There was a lad
from Astrals last place of work. Astral was in some kind of
stadium. He was guessing that it was for horse racing. There
were some dodgy people there and Astral was not confident
to play his guitar there. When Astral was talking to the lad
who Astral used to work with, it was like a battle. The lad
who Astral used to work with didn't seem to believe what
Astral told him. He was quite negative in his conversation
and yet Astral cannot remember any specific details about
what they spoke about. There was an air of mistrust, mainly
because of those people in the background that Astral was
aware of, but who never approached him. Earlier on in this

episode there was a female who Astral was shunned by, but
it was all very vague and Astral couldn't recollect it. This
episode was a very negative episode. Everyone in this
episode was negative. Even those people in the background
who did not speak were watching Astral from a distance in a
suspicious way. Astral was trying to win them over with his
talk and his guitar playing. Astral was playing the best stuff
that he knew on guitar. He was singing the best songs he
knew. He was choosing his words carefully when he spoke to
people, but the people were not on his side. At first Astral
didn't see it. Nothing negative registered with him, but then
after a while, slowly little snip bits of this episode came
together like a jigsaw puzzle, but with many pieces missing.

(verse 30) That, That Is Within The Delivery

The post woman was out doing her rounds. Astral greeted
her and put his arm around her. She had a base ball bat and
a base ball with her. She threw them both up into the air and
caught the base ball bat which became short and thick and
stubby. The base ball bat had gotten so short and stubby
that at first glance it looked like a rugby ball. The base ball
bounced freely along the ground and Astral swept it up in his
hands to give it back to the post woman. She smiled at
Astral as she went on her merry way and he watched her
cycle off in her mottled black and white clothing which had
two round lumps as the short stumpy base ball bat and the
base ball had been stuffed under her clothes. She briefly
stopped to look at two of Astrals solid guitar cases standing
side by side with their guitars in, that Astral had situated
about one hundred meteres down the road, before she
carried on cycling into the distance.

(verse 31) Wake Up!

Astral was at a residential college for music and there were
students with disabilities. There was a girl there who was so
small, she looked like a doll. People were saying that she
looked so happy and Astral was wondering if she had been
sniffing something. There was some dating going on and
there was an attractive girl that Astral was seeing, but the
relationship faded off. Astrals mum was also there. He was
aware that she was in the background sometimes as they all
socialised. Astral had a nice bed and he hung his plastic bag
on the end of his bed and went to bed which was then when
he woke up.

Chapter Eight - Down In The Toilet

(verse 32) This Crap Job
(verse 33) Oi! Fart Arse!

(verse 32) This Crap Job

Astral was at work and he's talking about how all the doors
do not fit. He was having a right good moan about this. He
was talking to the maintenance man and saying to him, "I

think that the others have heard me talking about the doors
not fitting." The maintenance man gets upset exclaiming,
"They know that we've been talking?!" Astral said "Well it is
about your job. You are allowed to talk about your job."
Astral was very aware of an attractive lass who worked
there. All the doors that didn't fit were toilet doors and the
maintenance man had a cubical for an office at the end of
the row of toilets. The attractive lass who worked there and a
manager would have over heard Astral talking from another
room out of the toilet area and Astral was aware that he
might have been talking too much.

(verse 33) Oi! Fart Arse!

Astral was at this house in the gardens and it was like a
crazy party. There were people chasing each other, people
asleep under shrubbery. Astral saw an old work friend and
they were having a chat when Astral farted. It was silent but
smelly. Astrals work friend did not know that Astral had
farted at first but then Astrals work friend smelt it. He made
a fuss and ran off. Astrals work friend and Astral had both
done up their push bikes and were there to sell them. Astrals
work friend had not been very confident about selling his
push bike, which Astral thought was odd, because he was
usually confident. So Astral went looking for his friend to tell
him that he too was there to sell a push bike that he had
done up and what were the chances of that?

Chapter Nine - Off Track

(verse 34) Terms And Conditions
(verse 35) Arti Intel Goes Rouge

(verse 34) Terms And Conditions

Astral was driving trains and these trains would get
damaged. Odds were being placed on these trains being
damaged and it was possible to make some money doing
this. One train was being disputed on how it was being fixed
and only certain fixations were allowed to be used.

(verse 35) Arti Intel Goes Rouge

Astral remembered seeing a flying train crash. He watched it
as it came off its horizontal launch pad. The train was high
up and essentially it was driven off a cliff. Astral watched it
as the big clumbering mass arced, arched downwards. Astral
wondered what it was going to crash into at first and then
there was an unreal splash as two columns of water shot up
into the air and arced, arched back in opposite ways to each
other like two chunky water snakes. Astral could hear
almighty quenching sounds of the crash as the heat of the
crash reacted quenching it into the river water. Astral was
excited that the train had crashed. It was in the direction
where he was heading back through, but then he felt guilty
for being so excited about a disaster like that. So Astral was
heading back and he had his push bike with him. He had
gotten off his push bike and was walking with it because the
ground was grassy and uneven. He was dubious about going

over this land because it was not a public space and he was
not permitted to cross this land. Astral was not comfortable
with trespassing. So as he got close to the crash site, he first
heard a fuss and then some shouting and he saw a military
man pointing his rifle. It was not pointing at Astral. The
military man was silhouetted up to the right of Astral on
higher ground and he was pointing his rifle in the opposite
direction to Astral, as he was shouting and ordering
aggressively to people who were out of sight from Astral.
Astral thought 'Shit!' He hasn't seen me, so Astral gingerly
carried on making his way across this waste grass land and
then suddenly he was spotted. Before he knew it he was
intermingling with the other people who were being rounded
up and he, like these other people, was reluctant to go in the
direction that they were instructed to go. So by now Astral
was walking without his push bike and there was a woman
who was watching him and was there to entice them all to
go through this narrow pass to be detained. Astral
recognized this woman, it was Arti Intel. He went up to her
and they connected. It seemed to Astral that she was not
happy with her job role, with having to round them all up and
all. So together they made their exit incognito from this
private wasteland and onto a more public space.

Chapter Ten - Ali The Asian Aspect

(verse 36) The Piss Take
(verse 37) Manipulation
(verse 38) Public Transport

(verse 36) The Piss Take

All that Ali remembered was that he was talking to
someone? He was telling them about someone who he was
talking to on the phone and Ali started to imitate their
accent. It was a cross between Pakistani and Jamaican. Ali
was aware of someone who was sat on a step. He was
wearing white robes and he was smiling at the accent that
Ali was imitating. This was in a pedestrianize street and
there were buildings with scaffolding up. Ali had been
looking at different types of vegetables.

(verse 37) Manipulation

'This man' came over to Ali saying that he wanted to talk to
him. He was a foreign man, because his vernacular was
unusual to Ali. Ali was expecting 'this man' to talk to him, but
he wanted Ali to phone him and then 'this man' went off, he
just walked away. Ali thought to himself, 'I don't want to talk
to him.' Ali was thinking that 'this man' wanted his frying
pan. This would be a problem because Ali wanted to do some
cooking. It was this lasses wedding that day. So Ali was doing
this cooking with his frying pan, thinking that he should ring
'this man', but Ali could not bring himself around to do this.
Ali remembered watching this lass with her wedding clothes
on and they were not traditional wedding clothes. Ali mainly
remembered her putting on her very thick platform shoes.
She had skinny jeans on and a cream and silver cardigan,
but she was about seven foot tall and she was about to
stand up in these platform shoes. Ali was thinking, 'She's like
a tall girl on stilts.' He noticed she had dark hair and it just

ended there.

(verse 38) Public Transport

Ali was on a crowded bus and people were smoking. There
was a Russian and he was smoking stolen cigarettes. The
bus was full of people and there was a lot of casual chatter.
Ali was talking to someone sat close to the Russian and they
were discussing about him smoking stolen cigarettes. Ali was
careful not to be too obvious that they were talking about
the Russian. Ali knew he was Russian because Ali had
previously spoken to him. They discussed his smoking, but
his accent was strong and it was difficult to communicate.
When Ali had spoken to him, the Russian was drawing on his
cigarette thinking about what Ali had just said. It would take
him a long time to respond to Ali and then he spoke with his
Russian accent which was difficult to understand. There was
another lad on the bus who came walking past them on the
bus as they were sat down. The lads hands and arms were
wet and soapy and people were saying to him "You are
always asking about Jamie." It was just a crowded bus full of
lads and they were all just casually talking away.

Chapter Eleven - Presentations

(verse 39) Presenting himself
(verse 40) Remember Roy Castle?

(verse 39) Presenting himself

Astral was dreaming that he was a sports presenter with a co
presenter called Chris. Chris had blonde hair and he was a
traditional style presenter. He liked sport. Astral was not
traditional as he would mess around and be more
flamboyant. Astral was spinning around in his chair. He was
singing. Astral was having a good time, but he did not know
sport and he was not interested in sport and yet he was a
sports presenter.

(verse 40) Remember Roy Castle?

Remember how it used to be? When there was Ross and
Norris and Norris and Ross. Roy is standing up presenting in
a studio with dramatic lighting and dramatic music and he is
very focused on his delivery. Roy is a co host and it is very
important to get the timing and delivery correct. Roy is
conscious of people watching him and how he is coming
across. Roy can see circles like giant camera lenses
projecting out and flashing down a countdown, three, two,
one. There are facts being presented here first by Roy and
then by the co host and this is all done to the music 'Master
Of Puppets' by Metallica.

Chapter Twelve - Other Consciousness

(verse 41) Dog Fish
(verse 42) A Ghostly Appearance

(verse 43) The Technician

(verse 44) Shifting Realities

(verse 41) Dog Fish

Somehow Astral had met a native person and he was
travelling with them which made three of them altogether,
but the third person was very vague and Astral did not know
who he was. They travelled across a frozen sea which was
frozen into corrugated sine waves. The native man said, "It
would only take one explosion and we would all be gone in
an instant." Astral said, "Let's get back then. It looks cold
down there to swim in." They went back, but they still ended
up swimming under water. They were retrieving some goods
from under water with some manual pallet wheels. It was all
a bit suspicious as to, if they should be getting these goods
from under water, but they got them back to dry land
anyway. Astral remembered dropping some goods off near a
dogs kennel before waking up. The goods resembled dog
food?

(verse 42) A Ghostly Appearance

Astral went to this woman's apartment. She was Scottish and
she had a big playful white dog. Astral was in her apartment
and he was looking out the window at something? It was
grassy and he was watching someone on that field in the
distance. Astral thought that he had been talking to that
person previously, but he didn't know what was said?

(verse 43) The Technician

The technician was a man in a white coat and he was
chatting to Astral. Astral remembered thinking that his teeth
felt okay. He couldn't feel them. Astral said, "Do you want to
have a look in the front?" Astral thought he was going to
have to disconnect the interior light from the front as they
were in the back of the vehicle. Astral thought that he was
going to have to turn the electric power off. Astral had a
screwdriver in his hand, but there were operating machines
on in the vehicle. Astral didn't know how they were going to
get the bulb out from the front of the vehicle without getting
an electric shock. The man in a white coat said, "Let me
have a look." So Astral left it with the technician.

(verse 44) Shifting Realities

Astral was really struggling to remember this reality. As he
was remembering it, it was changing. It was wriggling away.
He was trying to remember who he was conscious of. He was
familiar to Astral and yet he did not know who he was? Astral
remembered that he was smelly though. Like a wet plastic
mac smell and then Astral overheard someone say, "He's a
bit smelly. He's looking good though." Astral thought that
there was a teaching element to this consciousness. This
smelly consciousness was very difficult to remember. Astrals
memories of this consciousness had changed, as though the
way that it presented itself was not possible to express in
this reality. So all Astral could get when he tried to remember
what the consciousness was saying/doing/teaching? was a
memory that wriggled away from Astral. This was the only
was to describe the elusive element of this consciousness.

This consciousness was very abstractly surreal and could not

be communicated any better than Astral had just done here.

Chapter Thirteen - I'm Happy And I Know It

(verse
(verse
(verse
(verse

45)
46)
47)
48)

Roll Up, Roll Up

The Book Of Life
Women Who Organise
Astral's Dream Girl

(verse 45) Roll Up, Roll Up

Someone had given Astral some roll up papers that were
loose out of a rizla packet. Astral didn't ask for them
someone just seemed to read Astrals mind. Astral was then
waiting for tobacco. He was aware of some things that had
been going on with other people who were not around him.

(verse 46) The Book Of Life

Astral was resting on his bed and he was not quite asleep,
but he imagined in his dreaminess a book and each page
represented something and Astral got the idea to move on
and so he turned the page and the next page was
representing "Eye It." This was the title of the page. Astral
was trying to see what the other pages represented and so
he was looking at the titles, but it was not clear for him to

see. Then Astral came out of his dreaminess.

(verse 47) Women Who Organise

There was a lass from Lincoln and she was doing a party for
children. She had a box full of decorations and she was
starting to decorate the room. Astral was there and this lass
from Lincoln was telling the ladies from Notts That she would
be sorting out a birthday party for Astral. Astral was there
listening and he was grateful for the trouble that she was
going to. Astral was at a loss of words, not really knowing
how to react to her generosity, So he decided to play it cool.
Astrals birthday and birthday party was on Thursday. In the
meantime it was Tuesday and so they were concentrating on
doing the children's party. As the ladies were chatting to
each other Astral was just in the background taking it all in
and generally keeping a low profile.

(verse 48) Astral's Dream Girl

Astral was at his party. Alison and Kari were there from the
Shiny Show. They were all socialising. It came time to leave
the party and Astral had got all this stuff to take away with
him. There was a large yellow toy truck that he had and it
was on a long handle that Astral pushed or pulled the truck
with. Astral was making his way out of the party and people
were saying "Have you got all your stuff?" He gathered it all
up. He filled up his truck and carried some stuff as he left the
party with Kari. First Astral was pulling the truck then he was
pushing the truck making his way between people, out of the

party and into the lift with Kari and the truck of stuff. Kari is
wearing a silky green dress. Astral definitely had a crush on
Kari, but that's just a dream : )

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'Astral Travels' is a surreal novelette 8419 words written by

Adi Cox. Started on 11th September and was finished on 8th
October 2016.