Sunday Message – Holistic Healing 06

22/07/07
<Genesis 3:8-15; Romans 12:3-21>

INTERPERSONAL HEALING, LIFE OF BLESSING

• God has never left us and His work is always on us
• Are we still having some weaknesses? Do not be afraid because God will heal and use us
• We talked about lifestyle healing last week. Lifestyle healing is not simply about being strong. To
have lifestyle healing, we must first understand that we have gotten a royal identity and mission
• We won’t be weak forever; neither will we be strong in all things. However, we are absolutely royal
• Healing will take place when a person knows that he is royal
• Regardless of what we’d done in the past one week, as long as we come to God with an
expectant heart, God will cleanse us
• Since we are God’s royal children, the people whom God has placed among us are royal too
• Therefore, none of the people whom we have met since birth has harmed us or has caused us to
have bad luck
• God uses all the people beside us to nurture, teach, anoint, challenge, and renew us, as well as
to make us joyful
• We won’t be what we are today without these people and the experiences they brought us. In
order for God to complete His work in us, none of them could be left out
• It is probably our parents whom we have the most quarrels with. Without our parents, will we
become who we are today? How can we serve the Lord, meet our wives, have such adorable
children?
• We might always think that our parents give us a lot of hurts. However, after we are healed, we
realize that all the past hurts are actually blessings for us
• In the past, we might have hated our Chinese teachers the most. However, we use Mandarin in
sharing God’s word now
• We should never blame anyone or question God, why He allowed me to meet such and such a
person, who gave me much hurts. If we are still blaming someone, we are not able to discover
God’s love or examine His perfect will. In the end, we will end up blaming God
• If we are still blaming someone today, we will blame 10 more persons later
• God has clearly shown us two things: His words and the people beside us
• E.g. God blessed Adam after creating him. He blessed him by giving him His covenant (through
His word & Spirit). After which, He used His word and Adam’s life to create Eve (a visible person)
• The people beside us represent God’s guidance, help, comfort, love, challenges, etc. Therefore,
they represent all the different roles of God
• The people beside us will become a pain to us when our relationship with God has problems
• Satan uses the people beside us to attack us because he knows that relationships are so
important
• We will forget the hurts we receive from a stranger very quickly. However, it is not easy to forget
the hurts imposed on us by our loved ones
• God wants to bless us. Therefore, He gave us His words and gives us the people beside us
• After we have received grace today, we can give thanks to God for all the people whom we’d met
since young even for those who had hurt us before

Read <Genesis 3:8-13>

• v8 God has never departed from us
• v10 Men’s first enemy is himself. Men started having fear in himself
• This is the result of man after his fall

Read <Romans 12:3-21>

• v3 Interpersonal relationship must be done with sober judgment (合乎中道). We shouldn’t look
down on ourselves, neither should we think too highly of ourselves
• v6 We shouldn’t speak too spiritually if we aren’t that spiritual. Do not force yourself to speak
spirituality, as those who listen to you will not be able to stand it. It doesn’t mean we can’t talk
about anything spiritual. We just speak in accordance to our spiritual level
• v15 We can’t rejoice with those who are in joy or cry with those who are in pain because we
haven’t really love them

1. The truth in the interpersonal relationships that God has determined for me
<Gen 2:23, 2:10-20, 1:27-28; Eph 4:1-16; Matt 28:18-20; Romans 16:1-27…>
• We must first restore the truth that God has determined. Only through this truth are we able to
restore the correct interpersonal relationship
1) We, the children of God, are the source of all blessings
• We are the source of all blessings. This truth is independent of our conditions
• It is God who initiated the blessings on Adam and His life has entered the body of Adam.
Therefore, the Garden of Eden became the source where blessings flow
• We have the potential in us to bless all nations
• No matter how weak we are now; our family members receive grace only because of us.
Likewise, the people beside us are blessed because of us, despite our weaknesses
• It is because of our existence that people around us are blessed. This is the truth
regardless of whether we believe or not
• We are God’s children who received great love from God! Therefore, nobody can harm us
• We have enemies only because we had received small grace and are worried that others
can snatch it away
• We have “all blessings” in Jesus Christ. “All blessings” means endless blessings. If
someone did snatch our blessings away, God will top it up with greater ones
• Very often, we tell others that we are very pitiful. Thus, we are hurt easily by the words of
others. Those who always feel that they have limited blessings are afraid that they are left
with nothing if somebody is to snatch their blessings away
• Our vessel must be big. We won’t be easily deceived or attacked by the words of others
when our vessels are big
• If our vessels are indeed big, even if we give blessings to others, it will not be used up

2) Because we are the source of all blessings, we will become the blessings for all nations.
Nobody among the nations is able to make us lose out
→ All nations are targets who need our compassion, help, edification and blessing
• If we know that we are the source of blessings, we can then bless all nations. We need
not compete with them
• Our pastor is just a small figure who is known hardly to anyone
• It is all right for people to look down on us. More importantly is God must accept us
• Since we have gotten the things that are infinite, then it is all right whether we are able or
not to have things that are subjective
• We should pray that “from now onwards, I’m not going to receive anymore hurts”
• We receive hurts because our vessel is small. We will not be hurt if our vessel is big
 3) In order for us to bless the whole nations, God has already prepared the most unique
position, roles, gifts, etc for us
→ Use all these conditions to commune, supplement and grow up with others
• This is the perfect will that God has determined for us
• We must know what our roles and positions are. We can use them to bless others
• E.g. A daughter must use her role as a daughter to bless others. And a father must also
use his role to bless his children
• We can only build a relationship with the people among us, after we’d known what our
positions, roles and gifts are
• Regardless of what our character is, we just need to use that unique character to bless
others so that they can also taste the goodness of the Gospel
• This is what it means by “sober judgment”, which is equals to “God-determined”

4) And since I had received such wonderful blessings and enjoy them, I will love those who are
always with me more. At the same time, I will receive more of life’s grace from God
• We are the blessed ones. Therefore, as we continue to enjoy God’s love, we will also love
more and build a better relationship with the people among us
• No matter how we dislike our family members, we will still feel uneasy if something
happened to anyone of them. No matter how much we don’t like our parents, we will not
want to kill them that easily. Family ties are God-determined
• After we have become blessed (changes to lifetime purpose and interest), those who like
to be together with us and those whom we valued will become our blessing, just like how
we are a blessing to them
• Therefore, in <Romans 16>, the names that Paul wrote were his co-workers’. Having
received blessings, he met these people, developed a relationship with them and they
became co-workers
• After we become blessed, people whom we meet are likes bees. Before that, people
whom we meet are like houseflies. However, there will be some houseflies who will
become bees

5) Gradually, the boundless network that God prepared for us will expand
→ Especially for those who live a congregation- and church-centred life to develop their
inter-personal relationships, their life’s network will extend to many important people (贵人)
of this era
• After we become blessed, we can differentiate people. This is because every aspect of
our lives has changed. Therefore, the people and things we see as important or not will
be different from how we saw them in the past. We will slowly spend less time with people
whom we just engage in meaningless conversations with
• After we become blessed, we will discover that the most precious thing that God has
prepared for us is the congregation. We will love our fellow brothers and sisters and live a
congregation-centred life. After our congregation comes our relatives and friends
• After we have become co-workers, doors of evangelism will continue to open. Our
network will also expand
• The inter-personal relationship that God has fixed for us has a system
• It starts from God. Coming in together is a heart that loves people and blesses people.
After we have acquired the heart, knowing that we are the source of all blessings to
others, we will then bless the people closest to us, bless other people and then the whole
world

* We must clearly understand: The devil Satan is most afraid when two people who have known the
gospel come together to become spiritual co-workers
• There will always be obstacles to having a blessed interpersonal relationship
• A person’s understanding and trust for another person will not be complete. Even the
understanding and trust between a couple is limited
• Within a person, there will be messy and complicated thoughts and views (different personalities
within a person). At times, it is very difficult for someone to become one person
• Therefore, two different people cannot become co-workers or become one body, unless they have
the same spiritual gospel, the same spiritual perspective, purpose, method, same vision of the
kingdom etc
• Two people come together to do business. When business is good, things are fine. However,
when there are losses, there will also be a strain to the relationship
• The devil Satan is most afraid when two people who understand the gospel, come together with
the same perspective, method and purpose. He is not afraid of deep and stable relationships
• What Satan is most afraid is when a couple who have acquired a gospelized perspective, are able
to have a common perspective in physical, spiritual, psychological aspects and in turn love each
other and work together
• Satan’s attack is to prevent co-workers from joining up together, to understand one another and to
see everything using God’s perspective

2． The absolute answer in interpersonal relationships

<Gen 3:1-19(15, 21)> <Eph 2:1-22> <Ro 12:3-21> <2 Cor 5:14-19> <1 Pet 2:1-10>
1) See through: Satan’s work and tricks / deceptions. People are not out to cause harm to
others, but they are victims themselves
→ Therefore, we have to understand God’s vengeance using the mystery of the spirit
• The answer within answers is to be able to see through Satan’s tricks/ deception / work
in our relationship with our family, colleagues, friends
• Our enemy is not Man. Therefore, God told us not to repay evil for evil. Man is not the one
who caused harm to us. Man is just a tool used by Evil One to attack us. If we just face
Man alone and go against them, not only will our hurts not be reduced, we will have even
more problems and be at a greater disadvantage
• Only God can see the works of the evil one. In the most appropriate time, God will send
His angels and heavenly host to defeat the evil one and expose his scheme
• God tells us to rather give way. When we see our enemies hungry, we will feed them;
when they are thirsty, we will give them something to drink. God will give us back the true
justice and rewards
• God is just. He will avenge. However, His method is to first tackle the evil one who attacks
us
• Because God loves His children, He therefore tells us that He will avenge and repay. He
wants to protect us. He knows that the one who caused us to be disadvantaged is not
Man but the evil one
• When we listen to God’s words, it may seem to be like moral education but behind this
has a spiritual purpose
• We must understand the spiritual truth from the Bible. Otherwise, our lifetime will be in
suffering
• When we are nice to people, and vice versa, we will only feel a little happier, but we will
not have any exceptional feelings
• However, if we are nice and sincere to people, but others dislike us or get angry with us,
we must be prepared to receive more blessings. The more we must pray and anticipate
on God
• We must first see that the evil one is attacking us. Otherwise, the more we teach our
children, the more we will think that they are in the wrong or that we are in the wrong. In
the end, we will just enter a vicious cycle
2) Truly believe: Through the great love that was fulfilled on the Cross, all people are a blessing
to me
→ Therefore, when I have such a conviction from the Cross, all people are adorable to me
and they are people whom I can bless
• All people are a blessing to me and also people whom I can bless
• <Eph 2:11-22>
• No matter what kind of hurts we have experienced before, we should not be too
concerned about these hurts. We must first announce, there is no one hurt that is greater
than the hurt Jesus Christ experienced on the Cross. There is no one sacrifice that is
bigger than the sacrifice Jesus Christ made on the Cross
• Those who truly received the grace from the Cross will know that they have sins, but
Jesus who has no sins, died for the sinners. Therefore, they will not quarrel with other
people who also are with sins
• We do not want to look at people’s actions. People will be weak or moody in a matter of
time. No one can really abide by the Laws. Therefore, Jesus Christ Himself came to
eliminate the evil one
• No matter how disadvantaged we are, how much we have sacrificed, we are unable to
compare ourselves to what Jesus Christ had bear on the Cross for us. Therefore, we
must learn to be like Jesus all our life
• Is there anyone who doesn’t understand us right now? Our Lord Jesus Christ was also
not understood by many people
• Is there anyone who is angry with us? Aren’t there many more people who are angrier
with Jesus Christ?

3) Confirm: I have received love, grace and am called by God

→ Therefore, our entire life’s purpose is to be centred on loving God, loving people, and
confirming who we are
• While we live, we must be guided by the conviction of the Cross. Then will we be able to
have mercy on others in all things. Such people will not have enemies. While others may
hate them, they will be able to love all people
• Those who have the mercy of the Lord, who died and resurrected with the Lord will love
God, love people. They will be able to accept God’s love and love themselves
• There are many times when we cannot even love ourselves. If we have received God’s
love, and know that God will cleanse us and hence know how to love ourselves, we will
not hate other people
• The Bible tells us to forgive others. However, what does it mean to forgive others? What
do we use to forgive others? We must know that we are sinners ourselves. We are
actually to bless others
• Jesus Christ did not just tell His disciples that He has forgiven them. Jesus Christ only
asks that we follow Him
• We must be certain that we are loved. This first comes from seeing ourselves as sinner of
all sinners
• We are not to forgive all people, but we are to have a heart to bless all people (love God,
love people)

4) Understand: What is the position, status, role, gift that Jesus Christ has given me at this
present moment?
→ Therefore, in front of God and man, we should make sober judgment ( 合乎宗道 ), such
that our lives can become faultless, be it in front of God or man,
 • God has given different people different positions, status, roles. We just need to use them
and complement each other
• If we want to put on the Gospel shoes, we must wear shoes that are “fitting”
• E.g. If we are deacons, we must know that we are to serve others, serve the church. We
should not look upon ourselves too highly or reprimand others like how the pastor can do.
However, we should also not look too lowly of ourselves, and view ourselves as helpless
etc
• No matter what we do, we must do it have sober judgment
• E.g.: If a married sister has some strong views she wants to put across, she should do so
through her husband. This is because not everyone will listen to her and her husband
may not have “face” if she puts across her views too strongly
• We should have sober judgment in all things, in all situations, and on all people. There
should be different tones used when speaking to our staff, our bosses, our children,
commander etc
• Those who know their positions and roles well will have wisdom. They will know how to
say the right words at the appropriate time
• If we do not make sober judgment, even if the content is right, there may be unpleasant
consequences

5) Living it out: My entire life purpose is to serve in a ministry that saves people, heal them and
bless them: Become all things to all men so as to win more people
→ Therefore, conflicts in interpersonal relationships that are not beneficial will also occur
less
• “I have become all things to all men so that by all possible means I might save
some” <1 Cor 9:22>
• We do so that others can be comfortable. Our purpose is to bless others, heal them but
not to become hypocritical people
• When we do this, we will quarrel less with people. If we are really serving a ministry that
saves people, heals them and blesses them in our lives, there will not be many conflicts
• The reason why we have conflicts with others is because we want to play and touch the
things of the world
• We must also have time to go out and play with others. But the principle is to “play as you
serve”. The purpose of watching a movie together is to bless people. Therefore, even if
we cannot get the tickets, we will not blame others
• When we dine with brothers and sisters, it is not because the meal is exceptionally good.
Neither is it because we want to gossip about others. We dine together because we want
to bless one another, love one another. At that time, we will definitely have blessed
conversational topics

3． Sustain and develop interpersonal relationships

<Phi; 2:1-11> <Acts 2: 37-47, Acts 11: 19-30, 19: 8-20, 28:30-31> <Rom 16:1-27>
1) We have to learn about interpersonal relationships for our entire lifetime. Therefore, it is not
about focusing on not getting into ironies, quarrels but get a breakthrough, renewal, wisdom
and evidences in contradictory relationships
• Man is never perfect, therefore, we have to learn about interpersonal relationships for our
entire lifetime
• We have to learn because there exists contradictions. Therefore, we must seek answers
from contradictory interpersonal relationships
• Our focal point should not centre on “not quarreling”. Even if we quarrel or even when
there are contradictions, it is all right. The worst method is to “escape”. A person who
 escapes will not know where God’s blessings are and he will also not able to learn
anything
• God is pleased when we find answers in contradictions
(1) Relationship with the congregation
• God’s principle is: first love, then speak the truth. This is to edify a person and not to
expose his weakness
• Once we have told the person the truth, do not expect him to change immediately. We
ourselves cannot change immediately
• Once we have said the truth, we should work towards being one body, joined up and
held together
• Satan will never give up when he sees the congregation joining up as one body. If we
see the weakness of our brothers / sisters, but we do not bother, or do not find him or
the pastor, we will “explode” one day
(2) Relationship with non-believers
• God’s principle is: Be harmonious with them. They do not have God, hence how
much can you expect them to change?
• To remain harmonious, we must help them. When they need help, assist them; when
they need financial assistance, provide them some
• Non-believers totally dislikes one aspect of Christians, that is, they just say but there
is no action
• We are the “Prince of Peace”. When others see us, they will know that we believers
are not out to break people up
• When there are opportunities, we will testify to them. They will not be moved in one or
two occasions
• When we do these, we will definitely receive evidence

2) Rely on the Holy Spirit to differentiate people and evangelise. We must be absolutely God-
driven, message should be clear and to have an eager heart that loves lives
• We must first differentiate people before evangelizing to them. For those whose time table
is not ready, do not force them
• In the process of testifying to others, they themselves will meet with more and more
problems and will be blessed this way. Therefore, just wait
• When people look for us, we have to be honest, sincere in sharing the gospel to them and
also have a heart that loves their lives
• Therefore, this must be done by relying on the Holy Spirit. More than that, we must be
equipped before we know what to say

3) Develop a lifetime relationship with co-workers

Remember: What is more important than the ministry is the relationship, trust and perspective
between co-workers
• <Acts> talks about the meetings of co-workers and their progress
• When we become co-workers, our network will expand. Therefore, Satan will try to
intervene
• Before two people become co-workers, they will definitely encounter some trials / tests
• Many people can come together to work. But coming together to serve, there will
definitely be tests. The tests will call us to trust one another more
• When we become co-workers with others, doors of evangelism will open quickly. If God
wants to expand His ministry, He can do so very quickly. God is waiting for the
relationship between co-workers to be built up. This is because relationship and trust
require time to build up
 • When our relationship with others get better and better = mutual trust, will understand one
another’s lives
• If we have not reached this step, we will quarrel over trivial things and we cannot move
together
• This must be our lifetime goal
• If we often say, “Don’t tell pastor, preacher”, it means that we cannot face God in the
things we do. Therefore we are unable to face people. Otherwise, it means that we do not
trust our pastor
• Actually, no matter how we hide ourselves, people will find out about the things we do,
just like how others know that David committed adultery

Sharing and Prayer Topics

1. In this week, from the Truth that God sets on interpersonal relationship, give
thanks to all the people we have met / known. Find out the reasons for
thanksgiving
2. Today, what answer has God given me in my interpersonal relationships? How
should I treat those whom I love and detest presently?
3. From today’s message, how do I develop my interpersonal relationship with
believers and non-believers?